Page 1

The police chief shot his hunting buddy. P. 9

Everything you need to know about Juggalos.



P. 24

Better understand species dysphoria. P. 19

Kicked Out of Town




VOL 42/30 5.25.2016


Willamette Week MAY 25, 2016





No one knows who Thurman Street is named after anymore. 4

Portland will finally have a massive hipster sports bar. 18

The sheriff’s behavior has been “increasingly erratic,” say two of his three chief deputies. 6

If you want to eat gold leaf for dessert, there is a place. 21

This newspaper once published a story headlined “Corndoggle.” 8

When you claim to know how magnets work , we know you’re fronting. 25

Portland’s top cop shot a buddy and may have lied to cover it up. In unrelated news, Portland cops who shoot people on duty still can’t be questioned by investigators for 48 hours. 9

A weird mindfuck of a movie from 1973 will finally make its American premiere in Portland this week. 40



Photo by Julie Showers.

Ducks destroyed a beautiful mountain lake in California. Oregon Ducks, that is.

STAFF Editor & Publisher Mark Zusman EDITORIAL News Editor Aaron Mesh Arts & Culture Editor Martin Cizmar Staff Writers Nigel Jaquiss, Rachel Monahan, Beth Slovic Copy Chief Rob Fernas Copy Editors Matt Buckingham, Maya McOmie, James Yu Stage & Screen Editor Enid Spitz Projects Editor Matthew Korfhage Music Editor Matthew Singer Web Editor Lizzy Acker Books James Helmsworth

Visual Arts Jennifer Rabin Editorial Interns Grace Culhane, Russell Hausfeld, Jenna Mulligan, Ben Stone CONTRIBUTORS Mike Acker, Dave Cantor, Nathan Carson, Peter D’Auria, Alex Falcone, Shannon Gormley, Jordan Green, Jay Horton, AP Kryza, John Locanthi, Mark Stock PRODUCTION Production Manager Dylan Serkin Art Director Julie Showers Special Sections Art Director Alyssa Walker Graphic Designers Rick Vodicka, Xel Moore Production Interns Henry Cromett, Clifford King, Gabi McKenzie, Skylar Nguyen

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Willamette Week MAY 25, 2016



I was a good friend of Kay’s right after her graduation from Reed College [“Our Beloved Geek,” WW, May 18, 2016]. I also knew Paul Pomerantz at that time. Between the two of them, there was more intelligence than could ever be measured. Kay died on my birthday. Not a pleasant gift. —Scotty Richardson For the record, I was just the publicist for that benefit reading in 1992 featuring Dunn [who canceled], Jean Auel and Ken Kesey. The late Joel Weinstein was one of the ringleaders. I would’ve given anything to see KK Dunn breathe fire. —Angie Jabine What an interesting journey of a life. I have never read Geek Love, but it seems fantastic. I will have to check it out. —“brettchalupa”


“I would’ve given anything to see KK Dunn breathe fire.”


The sheriff needs a car that’s less than a year old in order to make appearances in various parades around town [“The Sheriff Rides Again,” WW, May 18, 2016]. Next time you’re viewing a parade and you spot a clown, wave to Sheriff Dan Staton. He’ll have his head poking out the sunroof. And he’ll be gunning his big V8. Which compensates for the two-stroke that usually resides in his “garage.” —“PaddyPower” Give me a break. Staton is the sheriff of the biggest county in Oregon, population-wise, where more


The alphabetical streets of Northwest Portland are named after historic Portlanders, but I can’t imagine that the 26 most deserving lined up neatly, one per letter. Did any total schlubs wind up with their own street just because their name started with an uncommon letter? —Capt. Xavier Quackenbush

Regular readers with extremely dull lives may remember our discussion of the Great Renaming (Dr. Know: “The Mystery of the Stained-Glass Numbers,” WW, Nov. 4, 2015), a flurry of streetname changes that followed Portland’s brutal 1891 annexation of two neighboring towns, the occupied territories of East Portland and Albina. 4

Willamette Week MAY 25, 2016

than 100 people a day go to jail. I think the sheriff should have a cut above the standard patrol car, and this agency has more than 500 sworn officers. Take a look at all of the money wasted by the Multnomah County Board of Commissioners (millions of dollars spent on studies related to I-5 bridges that are federal and state projects, not county). —“PDXSucks” This is an example of what so infuriates and frustrates me about the absolute incompetence of our government [“Give Us This House,” WW, May 18, 2016]. Multnomah County allowed a private party (Wilde Properties) to make a profit of $330,000 in eight days, and no one seems to be concerned. No one is accountable? —“help97221”


This article is ridiculous [“Pretty Hurts,” WW, May 18, 2016]. The same criticisms could be leveled at any number of dog breeds. Which is completely irrelevant to the individual dog owners, many of whom adopt rescue dogs, and their participation in an event that benefits the Oregon Humane Society. Your negative publicity hurts the very people who do what they can to clean up after irresponsible breeders. —“Arf ” LETTERS TO THE EDITOR must include the author’s street address and phone number for verification. Letters must be 250 or fewer words. Submit to: 2220 NW Quimby St., Portland, OR 97210. Email:

The Renaming was designed to make street names consistent citywide. This was apparently so much fun that the city fathers, drunk with power, decided to rename the already-consistent streets of the Alphabet District (formerly known simply as A Street, B Street, etc.) after some of their favorite white male landowners. Simple arithmetic dictates that a given dead guy’s chances of getting one of these streets named after him increases proportionally to the rarity of his last initial, which inevitably leaves one L.P.W. Quimby squirming uncomfortably in the spotlight. Quimby’s résumé—founder of a trucking company and state game warden—is indeed thin, but so are many others. Burnside Street, for example, isn’t named after Civil War general Ambrose Burnside, but after businessman and volunteer fire department enthusiast Davis Burnside, who doesn’t exactly bestride history like a colossus. Even perfectly good letters are represented by scrubs. John Marshall’s main claim to fame was being best friends with city founder Asa Lovejoy. (One can easily imagine Marshall hanging out the passenger’s side of Lovejoy’s ride, trying to holler at future historians.) The champion? A 1921 Oregonian article on street names reported that the namesake of Thurman Street was already forgotten. However, other sources note that a G. William Thurman was drinking buddies with the guy running the renaming project—a theory that has the pathetic ring of truth. QUESTIONS? Send them to

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Chief Deputies Ask County for Protection From Sheriff Dan Staton

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Franklin’s Advanced Scholar Program Loses Founder

Since teacher Susan Anglada Bartley helped start the Advanced Scholar program at Franklin High School in 2007, graduation rates have soared, particularly among black students (“Starting a College Stampede,” WW, Jan. 28, 2014). Now Bartley is leaving Franklin and the program she championed. She’ll transfer to Grant High School next fall,

returning to the classroom full-time. “We all need an opportunity to grow and change,” she said, declining to discuss her reasons for leaving Franklin. Portland Public Schools spokeswoman Christine Miles says the Advanced Scholar program will continue. Franklin officials “are working to name a replacement,” Miles says. W W S TA F F

deals good throUgh 5/30

Burgerville Warns Employees Not to Join Union

A newly formed Burgerville Workers Union has gotten an icy reception from management. On May 6, all Burgerville employees were given copies of a letter by their general managers signed by Jeff Harvey, Burgerville’s CEO. According to union organizer Luis Brennan, he and his fellow employees were told not to talk about the letter at work. “We have a special culture at Burgerville,” the letter reads, “which could be greatly changed by bringing a union into our organization.” The letter was the first major pushback for the new union, which was in the planning stages for months but became publicly visible only in late April. The union’s initial demand is a $5 raise for all hourly workers, and it has held marches across Portland and delivered messages to Burgerville’s Vancouver headquarters. (On May 14, the union gained the endorsement of Democratic presidential candidate Sen. Bernie Sanders.) Burgerville chief cultural officer Jack Graves tells WW the company will not interfere with employee decisions: “We respect their right to support or not support a union.”



Chloe vs. Steve


“My personal guess is, they have no respect for mankind, but professionally, I don’t know.” —Rob Sandbloom, sergeant in charge of the boating unit for the Shasta County Sheriff ’s Department, answering why college students would abandon more than 90 tents on an island in Northern California’s Lake Shasta. Much of the garbage left on Slaughterhouse Island on May 22 bore the logo of the University of Oregon. University officials described the mess as “disgraceful” and vowed to take action. LIZZY ACKER.


Nearly 60 percent of Portlanders who cast ballots in the May 17 primary voted for someone other than first-term City Commissioner Steve Novick. That pushes Novick into a November runoff with second-place finisher Chloe Eudaly, a housing activist and owner of Reading Frenzy, an independent bookstore on North Mississippi Avenue.

The Novick-Eudaly matchup promises to be one of the liveliest contests at Portland City Hall in years. It pits two avowed lefties and Bernie Sanders supporters against each other in a presidential election year. Here’s the tale of the tape:




Election Night Winners and Losers AARO N M ES H

WINNERS Ted Wheeler The next Portland mayor dispatched his would-be spoilers before sundown, eventually finishing with 54.7 percent of the vote. Mark Callahan He secured the Republican nomination to run against U.S. Sen. Ron Wyden (D-Ore.), despite never stating his position on the Easter Bunny. Tawna Sanchez The victor in the state’s closest race, in a North/Northeast Portland House district, wins by 123 votes, becoming the only Native American representative in the Oregon Legislature.


DHM Research The Portland pollsters not only failed to predict Sen. Bernie Sanders’ win in the Oregon Democratic primary—they missed it by a whopping 28 percentage points. Matt Wingard The former state representative from Wilsonville left Salem in 2012 after admitting to sex with a staffer. He’s not going back—Republican voters chose Richard Vial instead. Initiative Petition 28 Supporters of November’s $3 billion corporate tax proposal saw dire omens when a city gas tax narrowly passed, receiving just 52.1 percent of the vote in tax-happy Portland.

Chloe Eudaly

Steve Novick




15 percent


43 percent







Marshall Runkel, aide to former City Commissioner Erik Sten, donated $3,000 worth of political consulting.


Portland firefighters’ union gave $10,000, developer Martin Kehoe gave $6,000, and $5,000 came from the Greenbrier Companies, a barge manufacturer.

Started a Facebook group, “That’s a Goddamn Shed,” to protest high rents. It has 2,404 members.


Campaigned for U.S. Senate in 2008, starred in a TV ad in which he opened a beer bottle with his prosthetic hook.

Real estate developers. “Urban renewal has wreaked havoc on our low-income residents and communities of color,” she says.


The Oregonian editorial board.


“We must maintain our commitment to building subsidized housing,” he says. “But another part of affordability is getting our zoning code out of the way of smaller, attached housing. We should provide as many housing types at as many price points as possible, and prioritize stable, affordable rents.”

“I would declare a real state of emergency for housing,” she says. “I would also crack down on illegal shortterm rentals (single-family homes that are available year-round), which are likely to number somewhere between 400 and 1,600 units.”

Willamette Week MAY 25, 2016




Plumb, who says he doesn’t know Noecker, worries that investors with no historical allegiance to the business will turn Oregon marijuana into a commodity like corn or soybeans. In commodity markets, producers produce large volumes of undifferentiated products. They compete on price and often make thin profit margins. Plumb says the marijuana market in Portland should be more like the beer, wine and native who graduated from the University of Oregon, was just coffee markets in which consumers want top quality. another up-and-coming real estate investor. (Disclosure: Plumb has been an unpaid consultant for a But in 2014, Noecker and his sister and business partner, WW-sponsored marijuana event, Cultivation Classic.) Lauren, went on a buying spree funded largely by Nicolas “The generic model just isn’t going to work here,” he says. Berggruen, a Los Angeles billionaire with property interests “I don’t think warehouses flooding the market is going to fly all over the world. like it has in Colorado and Washington.” Berggruen is no stranger to Oregon. A decade ago, Still in its infancy, the Oregon recreational pot market is he invested $80 million in an ill-fated Clatskanie etha- growing fast. nol plant (“Corndoggle,” WW, April, 7, 2009). His other Tax receipts from recreational marijuana through existinvestments have fared far better. On April 17, the Sunday ing medical marijuana dispensaries are averaging nearly $3.5 New York Times business section described a new think million a month—vastly exceeding expectations. tank he’s funding, the Berggruen Institute, as a Davos-like Although the OLCC strictly limits the amount each gathering of elite intellectuals, but in Los Angeles. licensee can grow, there is currently no limit on the number “Mr. Berggruen stands out,” the story said, “because he of licenses an individual can obtain or the overall number of is a little-known but well-connected player licenses that will be issued. Noecker says at the nexus of wealth and rumination.” some growers believe the law allows splitIn 2014, Spencer Noecker says, he ting of tax lots—in other words, lining up believed industrial real estate—specifically, several different licensed grow operations “PEOPLE ARE warehouses—was significantly undervalued. in one building or on one piece of land. “If STILL OPENING Residential and commercial prices had you can split tax lots, there’s going to be a BREWERIES AND race to the bottom, and that will wipe out already spiked. And warehouse prices in Washington and Colorado were going crazy, the small growers,” Noecker says. DISTILLERIES driven by new demand from recreational One example of that is New York-based EVERY WEEK. marijuana investors in those states. Kalyx Development’s 107,000-squareOregon voters legalized recreational THE UPSIDE FOR foot Eugene warehouse. Kalyx bought weed Nov. 3, 2014. Less than two months the building for $3 million, The RegisterMARIJUANA later, on Dec. 31, 2014, Noecker bought his Guard reports, and plans to spend millions first warehouse—plunking down $3.65 mildividing it into multiple 10,000-squareIS ALMOST lion for a 49,000-square-foot building in foot grow sites. INFINITE.” Northeast Portland. He then went on a buyOLCC spokesman Mark Pettinger says ing spree, acquiring four more warehouses in multiple licensees may operate in a large —Spencer Noecker the next six months. In all, Noecker bought warehouse but they must have distinct just over 400,000 square feet of warehouse ownership—one large grower can’t operate space in the span of six months, spending $26 million. five or 10 licenses at a single location. Don Ossey, a veteran real estate broker with CapacBut despite the concern that big-money players may overity Commercial Group who represented the seller in one supply Oregon, Noecker walked away from a thriving real of those transactions, says the surge of interest in com- estate business. “Look, people are still opening breweries and mercial indoor marijuana grow operations tightened an distilleries every week, and those are mature industries,” he already red-hot market. says. “I think the upside for marijuana is almost infinite.”


Jeremy Plumb is watching the parade of marijuana investors bound for Oregon—and predicts the green rush could be headed for problems. Plumb has grown marijuana for nearly 25 years and aims to become a licensed recreational grower in addition to operating his dispensary Farma on Southeast Hawthorne Boulevard. (He’s already a medical marijuana grower, but Oregon’s recreational system is regulated separately.) He says he’s heard from and about a flood of out-of-state investors in the past year seeking to get rich quick by producing massive amounts of marijuana. “There’s going to be massive speculation, unrealistic expectations and epic flops,” Plumb says. Not everyone shares Plumb’s view. But as Oregon’s recreational marijuana market approaches the June 2 date for launching the sale of edibles and concentrates, it’s clear that investment dollars—many of them from out of state—are shaping the new industry. Already, the Oregon Liquor Control Commission has received 658 applications to grow recreational marijuana. Earlier this year, the Oregon Legislature removed restrictions that kept out-of-state investors from financing those growers. It’s far from clear how large the Oregon market in recreational weed can become. Yet investors are making huge bets on marijuana grow operations, grabbing up any warehouse space they can find in the Portland metro area. And there are few better examples of big money underpinning the explosive future growth of the Oregon weed market than Spencer Noecker. Until a couple of years ago, Noecker, a 31-year-old California 8

Willamette Week MAY 25, 2016

“Last year, there was a lot of activity,” Ossey says. “Now, there’s nothing for sale.” Noecker did well by getting in early. Ossey says prices went up at least 10 to 15 percent in the past year, and Noecker’s company has already taken advantage of the stronger market. Records show that on April 7 the company sold a 70,000-square-foot warehouse on Swan Island for $6.25 million—almost $2 million more than they’d paid for it less than 14 months earlier. Noecker didn’t stop at buying warehouses. He also struck a deal to purchase an established Hillsboro nursery called Duck Holdings Nursery LLC, for an outdoor growing operation. The nursery acquisition turned into a court battle, which made public the Noeckers’ grand plans. An email Lauren Noecker sent to the seller of the nursery gave a sense of the scope of their ambitions: “We have 350K square feet of prime industrial [warehouses] under contract,” she wrote in January 2015. “The nursery is an added interesting component.” But last year, as the regulatory environment around recreational marijuana became clearer, Spencer Noecker came to a realization: He had to choose real estate or weed. Bankers won’t lend money to anyone involved in the marijuana business, and even with Berggruen as an investor, Noecker’s real estate operation borrowed regularly. So Noecker quit the real estate partnership and bought one of the warehouses and the outdoor grow operation. Berggruen has no involvement in his weed business. Noecker’s companies have applied for 13 recreational licenses from the OLCC, the regulator of recreational weed—11 retail licenses and two production licenses.


PUBLIC SAFETY PARTNERS: Portland Police Chief Larry O’Dea (left) reports directly to Mayor Charlie Hales.

Hunting for Cover


gation is unclear, but it’s a misdemeanor under Oregon law to “negligently wound another” with On April 21, Portland Police Chief Larry O’Dea a gun. Conviction can cost a hunter his license shot a rifle, as he had many times in decades of for 10 years. hunting. It’s unusual for one Oregon hunter to shoot But the .22-caliber bullet he fired, at about another. There was only one reported incident in 4:37 that afternoon, tore into the back of a friend 2015, and O’Dea’s was the first reported this year. who had joined him to shoot squirrels in Eastern (The shooting didn’t dull O’Dea’s appetite for Oregon’s Harney County. The man had to be air- hunting. Records show that on May 16, the day the lifted to a Boise hospital after the incident. Oregon State Police began its criminal investigaBut it’s what happened next that may kill tion, O’Dea applied for new hunting licenses for O’Dea’s career. antelope, deer and elk.) Harney County Sheriff Dave Ward says when Second, the choice not to tell the public—or O’Dea first informed his agency of the Police Bureau’s rank and file— the incident April 22, he said it was “a could undermine O’Dea’s authority. “Larry self-inflicted accidental shooting.” “This incident has compromised Ward says he only learned May O’Dea is the integrity of the Police Bureau,” 16 that O’Dea, 53, had fired the bulPortland Police Association Daryl let. That same day, the shooting was a great Turner said in a statement. referred to the Oregon State Police chief whO The revelation comes in the midst for criminal investigation. of Hales’ efforts to negotiate a new is heartBut Portland Mayor Charlie Hales contract with the police union— knew O’Dea had shot his friend far including a possible end to the rule sick Over earlier. A spokeswoman for Hales allowing officers to wait 48 hours hurting told WW that O’Dea had informed after a shooting before speaking to the mayor of the incident three a frienD.” investigators. It’s one of Hales’ last weeks earlier, in an April 25 phone chances to burnish his legacy before —Charlie Hales call. leaving office Jan. 1. Yet the shooting only became pubFinally, if O’Dea lied to Harney lic when WW broke the story May County sheriff’s officials or allowed 20. Hales said there was no reason to disclose the his friends to do so, he’s in violation of a key incident publicly and defended his chief. Police Bureau rule. “Larry O’Dea is a great chief who is heartsick “The integrity of police service is based on over hurting a friend,” Hales said May 20. honesty and truthfulness,” the police rulebook But the questions—about what O’Dea did, says. “Members will not make any false statehow he handled the aftermath, and whether he ments to justify a criminal or traffic charge, or misled investigators—now imperil the chief ’s seek to unlawfully influence the outcome of any career, two years after Hales named him chief of investigation.” the Portland Police Bureau in April 2014. Past punishments for officers caught lying O’Dea declined requests for interviews, citing have ranged from suspension to termination. an internal bureau investigation as well as the On May 24, Hales bowed to pressure and state investigation. placed O’Dea on paid administrative leave pendThere’s a a lot at stake for the chief, the mayor ing the outcome of the various investigations. and the Police Bureau. The repercussions could “There are ongoing internal and external hit O’Dea in three ways. investigations related to this incident,” says mayFirst, there’s the question of whether he com- or’s spokeswoman Sara Hottman. “The mayor mitted a crime in the incident. is awaiting their outcomes before reaching any The scope of the Oregon State Police investi- conclusions about apparent contradictions.”

Willamette Week MAY 25, 2016


MOVING ON: Shanaquewa Finney and her family were moving their things to storage May 20.


On May 20, Shanaquewa Finney was packing the last of her things to put into storage. For six years, Finney has lived in a five-bedroom house in the outer Southeast Portland neighborhood of Mill Park with her family, including four children and now a grandchild. Rent is $1,500 a month. In March, Finney’s landlord told her to leave—but didn’t say what she had done to get kicked out. In Portland, the landlord doesn’t have to. “We didn’t know what we were going to do,” Finney says. “It’s unfortunate, and it’s unfair, very unfair.” After a year of working to improve her credit, paying off all her debts, Finney says she can actually get a mortgage, but not one large enough to buy a house in the go-go real estate market that is Portland. At least not within commuting distance of her job at the Urban League of Portland. “I’m not going to move to Salem,” she says. “I’ve looked in Vancouver. I’ve looked in Gresham. I’m not approved for the amount of money I’d need.” From one angle, Portland has never been more appealing. Unemployment is at its lowest level in 15 years. More than 12,000 people a year are moving to the city. Media everywhere compete to extol the virtues of our food, beer, coffee and now cannabis. Yet Portlanders like Finney live in fear—the dread that they’ll soon be told to leave their homes. According to a growing number of voices, this is not just a matter of market economics. It’s also that Portland and Oregon give tenants less protection than do some other U.S. cities and states. In Oregon, you can be evicted for no reason. Called a no-cause eviction, it’s not allowed, for example, in Seattle. Portland landlords can decide to throw you out even if you pay rent on time and never cause trouble; they don’t have to give a reason as long as they give you proper notice. Low income and requests for repairs may come into play, as long as landlords don’t divulge the reasons. CONT. on page 12


Willamette Week MAY 25, 2016


Willamette Week MAY 25, 2016


“Between a rock and a hard place, I chose the hard place.” —James Porter

In the past month, we’ve talked to a dozen people who have experienced no-cause evictions in the past year. We’ve chosen four of their stories. Some may feel these examples are what the laws of supply and demand and property ownership are all about. Others may view them as simply not the rules by which civilized society should operate—particularly when the tenants are elderly or disabled. Some of these evictions would be unlawful elsewhere. Other cases are more complicated. All share the backdrop of rapidly rising rents and landlords who can evict renters without a reason. “We see it as hugely destabilizing,” says the Rev. Joseph SantosLyons, executive director of the nonprofit Asian Pacific American Network of Oregon. “It allows unrelenting market forces to drive how our neighborhoods look and feel.” Tenants and advocates are pushing for protections offered elsewhere. Now they have a powerful ally: Portland Mayor-elect Ted Wheeler made restricting no-cause evictions a central theme of his campaign. That may be a hard promise to keep. Needing to unexpectedly find a place to live is a common upheaval for Portlanders. The sale of a 16-unit apartment building at 3562 SE Harrison St. last November for $2.65 million—more than 10 times what it previously sold for, in 1988—sparked fear in the building. In some cases, the sale of an apartment building results in the new owners evicting all tenants—or at least many of them—so renovations can be completed. Buildings that once served low-income renters are turned over to wealthier residents. S, a 32-year-old student who requested anonymity, was among the tenants told to get out by the new owner, Bristol Urban Apartments, while units were upgraded. If she wanted to move back in, S would now face a 66 percent rent increase on her $750-a-month unit. “I feel like I got an Old Portland deal,” she says, noting the rent on her month-to-month lease hadn’t gone up in her four years living there. “We all really made it our home.” A former organic farmer, S moved to Portland for the food culture and access to the outdoors. Plus, the city was affordable. The new owners offered displaced tenants $200 toward moving expenses, but given that the company never responded to questions after the building’s sale, S says she decided not to pursue the offer. Still, she considers herself one of the fortunate ones—she has a car and credit cards to get her through the cost of moving. She was able to rent a two-bedroom house—albeit outside Portland, in West Linn. Her rent doubled, but she will soon be paying the same amount as before after a roommate moves in later this summer, she says. Other cities offer renters more protection than Portland. Seattle’s just-cause policy would allow a new landlord to evict S for renovations, but the landlord and city must split the cost of $3,340 paid to low-income tenants for relocation. Steve Rose, owner of Bristol Urban Apartments, points out that he gave more notice than was required, warning tenants as soon as the building was sold. He says no-cause notices were issued only to apartments where work was needed. “The building needed a significant amount of work,” says Rose, whose company owns about 30 apartment buildings. “There has been very little maintenance done in the last 20 years.” He contends that no-cause evictions allow landlords to get rid of bad tenants for the protection of other tenants. He also believes there is no way to legislate against all bad landlords, though he supports education and driving bad landlords out of the business. “They should all be punished,” Rose says, noting that bad landlords create problems for good landlords. “It screws up everybody’s life.” 12

Willamette Week MAY 25, 2016


CHANGEOVER: Finney’s daughter Dazjonae Finney, 21, and granddaughter Laniyah Barrow, 7 months, before the family learned it had a reprieve in its living situation.


estricting no-cause evictions can give tenants more security in the face of health and safety problems at their homes. Shanaquewa Finney’s house has a mold problem—she says she complained about it to the landlord soon after moving in, but she stopped complaining, she says, because she wanted to stay. The problem became more acute, and she worried about it more after her grandchild arrived last fall. On March 9, Finney called the city to complain. Eight days later, she was told she would have to move. Chris Gasperini, the daughter of property owner Ada Tryon, says the tenants’ departure was necessary to clean up the mold, which Gasperini learned about this year. “It has nothing to do with her,” Gasperini says of Finney. “The house has a mold problem.” “We notified her we have to take care of it,” Gasperini added, before referring WW to the property manager, who did not return calls seeking comment. On May 20, Finney consulted a lawyer, who told her the landlord had failed to give proper notice of the eviction. At WW press deadlines, Finney still has no idea if she’s going to be evicted. The prospect that her landlord could refile the eviction notice fills her with anxiety. “Am I going to be unpacking my stuff now? No, I’m living out of boxes,” she says. State law provides some protections for tenants whose landlords are aware of health and safety issues.

There can be more protections under “just cause” eviction laws, stipulating that landlords may have to cover a tenant’s relocation costs if there are health and safety violations. Even when a landlord has good reason to evict a tenant, a no-cause eviction can offer an easier eject button. Landlords can use no-cause evictions instead of taking their claims to court, where tenants would have a chance to correct the problems raised or argue their side of the case. One result of skirting a formal legal process? It’s often hard to tell who’s really to blame. Consider the case of Janice Carr. For three months, Carr rented a room in a Parkrose house. She had known her landlord for at least 15 years. On Sept. 15, Carr was asked to leave by owner Becca Lyons, with no cause listed. Carr, a former contractor who is now disabled, still wonders why she was evicted. Was it because she had volunteered too many opinions about the way contractors were working on the house? Or was it that her erstwhile friend and landlord decided she could charge more rent? Carr paid just $400 a month, she says. Lyons, Carr’s landlord, says she had good reason to evict: Carr didn’t pay her rent and argued with other tenants. (Records show Lyons called police about Carr the day before she sent her an official eviction notice, and on three other days afterward.) Carr denies that she caused trouble and says she paid rent until the eviction.

A police report shows Lyons and Carr’s friendship clearly deteriorated after the eviction notice. On Oct. 3, police responded to a complaint from Lyons. “She said she confronted Carr about leaving and told her she was going to call [Department of Human Services] on her,” the report says. “She said Carr pushed her and then picked up a metal pipe in a threatening way.” Carr and her son denied that allegation to police. The officer made no arrest and “advised Carr and Lyons (separately) to avoid contact with one another.” The closer you get to stories of eviction, the messier they become. What looks from one angle like a heartless landlord looks from another like self-preservation. But the Oregon law is clear: The decision rests with the owner of the property. Lyons says she and a lawyer discussed going to court to evict Carr for harassment or failure to pay. That process would have provided clarity about who was at fault, and might have been faster. But a no-cause eviction was simpler. Carr left the Parkrose house in December and has been shuttling between friends’ homes in her aging, blue Dodge pickup, carrying a plastic tub of her possessions. “It gets old,” she says. Lyons says she was unprepared for dealing with her friend’s behavior, and notes she was new to being a landlord. “It’s a steep learning curve,” she says. CONT. on page 15

Willamette Week MAY 25, 2016



Willamette Week MAY 25, 2016

O STAYING PUT: Davion Finney, 16, and his family are living out of boxes while they wait to hear what’s next.

regon isn’t alone in failing to provide tenants protection from no-cause evictions, advocates say, although far greater protections are provided, for example, in San Francisco and Seattle.

Portland’s problem is exacerbated by vacancy rates below 4 percent, and monthly rents in Portland climbed last year more quickly than almost anywhere else in the nation. “We have unbelievably weak renter protections,” says Lisa Bates, a professor of urban studies and planning at Portland State University. “Eviction is a very hot topic in housing right now. It’s a national conversation. “In most of those conversations, it’s about providing additional legal protections for tenants. It’s very different from a conversation here, which is sudden termination with no recourse of any kind.” Portland renters do have some protections, though many are federal. Landlords are forbidden from discriminating on the basis of race, religion or Section 8 voucher. It’s also illegal to retaliate against anyone on the basis of making a complaint about the landlord. But that can be difficult to prove in court unless it’s blatant, argue tenant advocates and lawyers. Nobody knows how many Portlanders have been evicted for no cause, because unlike home foreclosures, evictions often don’t go as far as court. (Landlords often don’t even call them “evictions” because they usually don’t reach court.) The exact number of renters evicted “without cause” in Multnomah County is unclear. But there are indicators. Earlier this year, the David Douglas School District, which is located in a densely populated swath of East Portland, analyzed students who were identified as homeless (which, by the school definition, includes living on couches, in hotels or in shelters) during one hectic week. It found that more than half of 79 homeless students had faced no-cause evictions. “It’s not as affordable in David Douglas as it was a year ago, two years ago, three years ago,” says student services director Barbara Kienle, noting that a district official spends a couple hours each week helping families try to find housing. Margot Black, an organizer of the activist group Portland Tenants United, says she hears of more no-cause evictions each month, though she attributes that partly to a growing tenants’ Facebook group. Tenant advocates say Portland and Oregon have failed for a generation to enact protections for renters. Nothing short of more housing is likely to solve the problem of rising rents, but

Mimi Cernyar Fox The Ever Rolling Sea

“Winter Sea in C Minor“ acrylic on canvas, 42” x 56”

Exhibition runs June 3–30, 2016 Opening reception is Friday June 3rd, 5–8pm Gallery hours are Mon–Sat 10–5 Brian Marki Fine Art, 2236 NE Broadway St •


Demand for rental units in Portland is so strong that the problem of no-cause evictions now extends to the city’s lower-cost suburbs. In Gresham, the sale of an apartment building last year carried higher stakes for James Porter, 61, who has stage 4 kidney disease after suffering, he says, six heart attacks in the past three years. Porter, a disabled appliance technician, says he has paid rent promptly. “Never a day late, never a dollar short,” he says. Yet, in March, he was told to leave, and he has to be out of his apartment by the end of May. “They’re going to kick me out so they can do whatever,” he says, speculating that the $850 a month he pays for a two-bedroom unit isn’t enough now that similar units are renting for $1,200. In fact, two-bedroom apartments at Parkside Apartment Homes are now listed for as much as $1,806 a month and marketed on the building’s website as having stainless-steel appliances, including access to a 24-hour fitness center with a relaxing “sauna spa.” Porter and his partner, Theresa Pribbenow, 50, live on $1,600 a month, they say. “It’s Gresham,” she says. “It’s not supposed to be expensive.” Porter and Pribbenow say they have no place to go. “I count coins to get my medicine in the middle of the month,” Porter says. “I’m in the last whatever of my life. I don’t deserve to be outside. It’s just not right.” He’s reaching out to social-service agencies for help. But the situation has left him increasingly desperate. “The only option is to go and rob a bank for a dollar and have them put me in jail,” he says. But Porter won’t overstay his welcome for fear that a court-ordered eviction in this market would mean he won’t be able to find a new place to live. “Between a rock and hard place, I chose the hard place,” he says. The landlord declined to comment.

Portland Nonprofits! It’s almost time to apply for the 2016 Give!Guide and nominate someone for the Skidmore Prize.

JUNE 1 AT GIVEGUIDE.ORG. Willamette Week MAY 25, 2016



NEXT UP: Mayor-elect Ted Wheeler has promised to change the rules on Portland’s no-cause evictions.

new rules could give tenants some leverage in a market where they currently have little security. In Seattle, for example, landlords cannot evict tenants without having one of 18 reasons, including the tenant’s failure to pay rent or abide by the lease, or the owner’s desire to sell or live in the unit. In some cases, landlords must pay for a low-income tenant to move out. Tenant advocates have identified “just cause” as a key for Portland. “At this point, it’s our highest priority,” says Justin Buri, executive director of the advocacy group Community Alliance of Tenants. “It would drastically reduce the fear tenants have when they’re asking for a repair or defending their rights in some way.” John DiLorenzo—a lawyer and apartment owner who last fall sued the city for passing a rule that requires a 90-day notice for rent increases—says tenant advocates and politicians have failed to make the case there’s a growing problem with no-cause evictions. “Where a scalpel will do, you’re going to use a sledgehammer,” DiLorenzo says. “That doesn’t make any sense unless, again, you’re an advocacy group that wants a whole lot of stuff to put on a brochure, or a politician who says, ‘Hey, look what I’ve done.’” The politician promising to restrict no-cause evictions? Portland’s next mayor, Ted Wheeler. Though he won’t take office until January, the mayor-elect says he will keep that campaign promise. “I made the just-cause eviction process the centerpiece of my tenant bill of rights because I do believe we have the legal authority to implement it,” Wheeler says, though he expects a legal challenge. “Admittedly, it will probably have to be clarified in the courts; that’s the way it works in America.” One key lawmaker backs him up. “The way I interpret the law, I don’t see a reason why localities couldn’t abolish ‘no cause’ on their own,” says state Rep. Alissa Keny-Guyer (D-Portland), chairwoman of the Oregon House Committee on Human Services and Housing. But Multnomah County officials and Portland city attorneys have decided that the legal case for local action is tenuous at best—and may first require a change in state law. Portland city attorney Tracy Reeve stated in an opinion last month: “Based on our research, we do not believe Oregon law currently would permit such an ordinance.” Her opinion offered no rationale, but the idea is that state law pre-empts the city from acting, given that it mentions that landlords may get rid of tenants “without cause,” though only with the proper amount of notice. City Commissioner Dan Saltzman, who oversees the Portland Housing Bureau, says state law gives him few options. “It’s pretty draconian,” Saltzman says. “It doesn’t give any recourse to tenants.” Wheeler says he’ll try to change the rules anyway. “While I do respect the opinion of the city attorney, attorneys aren’t engaged by government to dictate policy; they are there as advisers,” Wheeler says, noting he will push for change in Salem if his efforts fail in court. “I would encourage those in the realtor and developer and landlord community to work with us now on some pragmatic solutions,” Wheeler says, “if for no other reason than to alleviate the likelihood that the Legislature might do something that they don’t like.” Tenants hope he will succeed. “You can be evicted for no reason whatsoever,” says Finney. “It can really cause your life to spiral downhill. The landlord should have to have a legit reason.” 16

Willamette Week MAY 25, 2016



Gathering of the

Juggafacts P. 24

Willamette Week MAY 25, 2016


“If I found them, I would break their fucking jaws.” page 24



Y O G A A N A T O M Y. O R G

YOGA FIGHT: An international yoga scandal came to Portland last weekend, as owners of the Yoga Union studio clashed with the owner of their building over the booking of a controversial speaker. Yoga Anatomy author Leslie Kaminoff is scheduled to give lectures at the studio June 24-26. Earlier this month, he made misogynistic comments about victims of assault in yoga communities, which drew the ire of other yogis. “I don’t support his presence at YU,” Chris Calarco, the building’s owner and a prominent local instructor, wrote on Facebook. “His comments display his strikKAMINOFF ing white, male privilege.” Todd Vogt, co-owner of the Yoga Union studio, replied: “We do not feel there is a threat. He obviously isn’t a mere stereotype of a privileged white male.” Yoga Union later apologized: “We regret our language around these matters. In truth, we feel very sensitive and confused.” There will now be a public forum to discuss studentteacher boundaries, but Yoga Union says it is still under contract to host Kaminoff.

CENTURY STARTS: The long-awaited hipster sports bar Century has finally set an expected opening date. The bar tentatively plans a soft opening June 10 at Southeast 9th Avenue and Sandy Boulevard with a streetside patio, multiple bars, a giant painting of Johnny Unitas, and retractable bleacher seating with huge projector screens for movies and sports. “It was supposed to open last August,” says Phillip Conner, spokesman for the bar. But while the bar has lost an entire football season, and most of the basketball season, “it’s come out as envisioned,” says Conner. “We have these mockups that the architects sent out. It looks exactly like the artist renditions.” >> The former St. Jack space on Southeast Clinton Street will reopen this summer as Jacqueline, from chefs Derek Hanson (Broder, Laurelhurst Market) and Brandi Lansill (Old Salt, Renata). It’s named after the submarine in The Life Aquatic With Steve Zissou, not St. Jack, and will feature a seafood-heavy menu. SUPPORT THE TROOPS: In April, U.S. Sen. Jeff Merkley (D-Ore.) helped pass an amendment to an appropriations bill that would allow Veterans Health Administration doctors to discuss and make recommendations about the use of medical marijuana with patients. Last week, U.S. Rep. Earl Blumenauer (D-Ore.) passed a similar amendment to the same bill on the House floor. If the bill goes through with these amendments, veterans will be allowed to talk to their VA doctors about cannabis in states where medical cannabis is legal. “We lose veterans to suicide at a rate 50 percent higher than the regular population,” says Blumenauer. “What we’re doing now isn’t working for them.” TRIAL STAGE: Lori Sue Hoffman, former executive director of the all-volunteer Defunkt Theatre, was arrested May 19 and stands accused of 10 counts of theft related to her management of the company’s finances. Andrew Klaus-Vineyard, co-artistic director of Defunkt, says Hoffman stole about $50,000 from the theater between 2010 and 2015. A year ago, Defunkt removed Hoffman from her volunteer position and turned the matter over to police. “We knew this was coming for a long time, but that doesn’t make this any easier,” Klaus-Vineyard says of Hoffman’s arrest. 18

Willamette Week MAY 25, 2016


GO: Furlandia 2016 is at the Sheraton Portland Airport Hotel, 8235 NE Airport Way, 503-281-2500, furlandia. org, on Friday-Sunday, May 27-29. $45.


WEDNESDAY, MAY 25 Earthquake Hurricane

[STANDUP] Before Curtis Cook becomes the next big comic in Portland to blow up, watch him do drunken and hilarious crowd work at this weekly bike-shop showcase with patriarchy mole Alex Falcone, “accessible Kardashian” Bri Pruett and Anthony Lopez, the little one. Velo Cult Bike Shop, 1969 NE 42nd Ave., 503-9222012. 9 pm. Free, $5 suggested donation. 21+.

Free Speech

[GIRLS WITH FANGS] Uncensored story time with a feminist slant takes over the posh tomboy boutique Wildfang once a month. Round 3 features ladies from W+K, local runner/baker Karolyn Tran and Judge Adrienne Nelson. Free, if you bought anything at Wildfang in the last 30 days. Wildfang West, 404 SW 10th Ave., 503964-6746. 7 pm. $10.


Pretty Penny Pop-Up


People don’t really understand furries. You think you do, because you saw them on Tosh.0 humping each other while wearing full-body plushwear. But seriously: No. With furryfest Furlandia 2016 landing softly at the airport Sheraton this weekend, it might be time to check your preconceptions about this much-maligned subculture and adopt a more supportive attitude toward people experiencing species dysphoria.

Furry means different things to different furries.

Furries get into furry fandom for a number of reasons, some more spiritual than others. There are many furries who report species dysphoria— similar to gender dysphoria in the trans community—and plenty of others who just like Star Fox video games and dressing up in costumes. “Furry is actually difficult to define, explain or understand because it’s very nebulous,” says Furlandia spokesfurry Alexander Olivarez-Sanchez. “There is no central pillar like Star Trek, comic books or what not.”

There are different degrees of furry.

Some furries go full furry. Others have just the ears. It is possible to identify furry without even dressing up. Sydney “Moths” Whitcomb, founder of Mothsicle Suits (which produces furry costumes, called fursuits), says the main classification that


[WEIRD SOUTH] Atlanta’s Awful Records is the South’s answer to Odd Future circa 2010, and Father is its de facto leader. On his new album, Father raps in a subdued drawl that suggests disillusionment with the drug-fueled lifestyle he glorifies. Analog Cafe, 720 SE Hawthorne Blvd., 503-2067439. 4 pm. $17. All ages.


defines furrydom is a mix of animal and human characteristics. A furry could be a four-legged talking dog, a bipedal wolf or a depressed bear.

Committing to furryhood is expensive.

Websites for the top fursuit producers don’t even list prices. Instead, furries contact the site personally for a quote. One national fursuit producer, Autumn Fallings, lists the average pricing for a full fursuit at $3,000 to $5,000. Another national producer, Dexterous Zombie, sells fursuits in partial pieces: sockpaws ($270), tails ($30), handpaws ($207), arm sleeves ($60) and masks ($800). Through her site, Mothsicle Suits, Whitcomb made 10 costume pieces last year, and says business usually ranges from four and 10 pieces a year, depending on how busy she is with school. “Supply costs change every few months, and prices can vary based on character designs,” Whitcomb says. “Typically my partials can be as cheap as $500 and as expensive as $1,000.”

It’s fandom, not a fetish.

[CHICKEN?] Fine St. Jack and La Moule chefs Aaron Barnett and Cameron Addy will put their vast wealth of Continental culinary knowledge and experience to use by making fried chicken sandwiches and chicken finger baskets, one day only, in the old Lardo food cart. Lardo, 1212 SE Hawthorne Blvd., 503-234-7786, 5-9 pm or until they get tired.

There are sexual fetishes within furry fandom, just as there are fetishes in Harry Potter fandom. (See “Words to the Wolves,” WW, Sept. 11, 2012.) But if you boil the meat of furry fandom down to fetishism because anthropomorphic animals make you think of bestiality, who’s the one with the problem?

[WINE] Southeast Wine Collective will host a party and tasting of 24 spring releases from the 10 wineries housed there—from flagship Division Wines to newcomers Stedt and Welsh. Southeast Wine Collective, 2425 SE 35th Place, 503-208-2061, 3-6 pm. $20$25, includes food.

TUESDAY, MAY 31 Tim Heidecker and His Ten Piece Band

[COMEDY ROCK] Best known as the dominant half of the comedic duo Tim and Eric, Heidecker’s music career actually predated his other entertainment forays. On his recent LP, In Glendale, hokey, MOR radio rock is done convincingly enough to make your head itch. Mississippi Studios, 3939 N Mississippi Ave., 503-288-3895. 7:30 pm. $25 advance, $28.50 day of show. 21+.

Willamette Week MAY 25, 2016


FOOD & DRINK Traditional taste, contemporary nourishment. The only all gluten-free, Middle Eastern lunch buffet in town. Delicious vegan and meat dishes. Signature cocktails with Middle Eastern herbal infusions. Join us!


320 SW Alder St. M-F 11:30 a.m.- 9 p.m. Sat. 12:30 p.m. - 9 p.m.

By MATTHEW KORFHAGE. Editor: MARTIN CIZMAR. Email: See page 3 for submission instructions.

THURSDAY, MAY 26 Pretty Penny Pop-Up

La Moule chefs Aaron Barnett and Cameron Addy serve up fried chicken sandwiches and chicken fingers in the Lardo parking lot. Lardo Hawthorne, 1212 SE Hawthorne Blvd., 503-234-7786. 5-9 pm.

FRIDAY, MAY 27 Enso Sangria Can Release

This will be the fizziest and cheapest wine party this weekend: $4 for 12 ounces. Enso Winery, 1416 SE Stark St., 503-683-3676. 4-11 pm.

SATURDAY, MAY 28 Shandong Basque Supper Club


In a secret location, chef Jose Canteras will mix the food of his own Basque heritage with modern culinary techniques, from prawns with foie gras flan and chorizo aioli to monkfish with cauliflower pil pil. Tickets at 7 pm Saturday and Sunday. $95.


This Memorial Day wine tour features tastings of 24 releases from 10 wineries, plus lovely coconut pork banh mi. Tickets are $20 at, $25 at the door. Southeast Wine Collective, 2425 SE 35th Place, 503-208-2061. 3-6 pm.

Memorial Day in Wine Country

Simple ApproAch

Bold FlAvor vegan Friendly

open 11-10


An epic 158 Willamette Valley wineries open their doors to the public this weekend. Check willamettewines. com for a full accounting. Willamette Valley Wine Country, various locations.

SUNDAY, MAY 29 Seafood Sunday at Teutonic

Nothin’ says “fuck it” like holding a Texas-style crawfish boil at your winery on Memorial Day weekend. Teutonic Wine Co., 3303 SE 20th Ave., 503-235-5053. 1-7 pm.

1. Laurelhurst Market

500 NW 21st Ave, (503) 208-2173

Fuck fancy. The spicy Italian grinder is the greatest American sandwich ever invented. Don’t get me wrong. I love the bacon-relish asparagus at Meat Cheese Bread, the five-spice pork at Devil’s Dill, and the puffed-up muffuletta and Cubano at Bunk. But when I think “sandwich”—the Platonic form of sandwichhood—what I think of is the spicy Italian sub the way it’s made at O-Bros Osteria, a new food cart perched on the far western edge of the pod at Southwest 10th Avenue and Alder Street. The O-Bros, Oscar Olalde Oviedo and Jose Marcos Alvarez, started this Italianstyle sandwich, panini and pasta cart in March. And their spicy Italian is probably my new favorite in town. The sandwich contains the holy trinity of cured meat, with ham, salami and pepperoni blooming out of chewy French bread. On top is the other holy trinity of thick-cut fresh tomato, semi-circles of red onion and just enough lettuce to add crispness. There is, of course, provolone. And Parm. And dear Lord, there is banana pepper. Stone-ground mustard, mayo, olive oil and vinegar are applied judiciously and evenly, with no oil overflow or mustard sinus hit. The fillings outshine the bread, as nature intended. Acids balance fat, as God decreed. It is classic as Jack Purcells. And it costs $8, the price of a sandwich. It is a perfect sandwich—the most perfect rendition of the old-school grinder I know anywhere near, rendered with loving attention to detail. Are the meatballs good? Yes, the meatballs are good, whether served sandwich-style or as adjunct to pasta, with a housemade, stewy marinara that is neither watery nor acid bath nor sugar syrup, covered on the sandwich with a fat blanket of Parmesan. The O-Bros’ slow-cooked beef is nice enough—though it doesn’t touch Devil’s Dill’s braised beef across the river. And their “downtowner” pastrami is likewise reasonable, although it’s unclear pastrami wanted the deli-sub lettuce-onion-tomato treatment. But oh, man, the spicy Italian. It’s the stuff of dreams I’ve been having since childhood. MATTHEW KORFHAGE. The O-Bros Osteria cart makes our new favorite spicy Italian in Portland.

2. Wiz Bang Bar


820 NE 27th Ave., 503-234-7151, A towering fried chicken sandwich with a crisp crust and drippy, juicy flesh—too tall to stand on its own without a knife stabbed in it. $.

4. Wild Hunt

3303 SE 20th Ave., 971-282-2181, Viking Soul Food cart spinoff the Wild Hunt is in front of German-style wine bar Teutonic, serving up lamb meatloaf with a side of lingonberries. $-$$.

5. Akasaru

2712 NE Alberta St., 503-284-7000, Tiny Akasaru is not going to knock any ramen titans off their perches, but the little corner soup shop has a quite nice bowl of agedashi tofu. $.

Willamette Week MAY 25, 2016

Bumpin’ Grinders

EAT: O-Bros Osteria, Southwest 10th Avenue and Alder Street. 10 am-4 pm Monday-Friday.

3. Basilisk


BELLISSIMO: The spicy Italian.

3155 E Burnside St., 503-206-3097, There’s a grill. In the parking lot. With killer smoked chicken. 126 SW 2nd Ave., 503-384-2150, Mmmmmmmmmmmmm, peanut butter and jelly sundae. $$.

accepting reservations for Father’s Day brunch


= WW Pick. Highly recommended.

Cerveza Negra Caliente (BARLEY BROWN’S)

If I were Tyler Brown, I’d just give up the hop thing. Sure, his Baker City brewery is best-known for hopbombs like Pallet Jack, Hand Truck, Ratchet Strap and Turmoil, the Cascadian Dark Ale that took gold at the World Beer Cup earlier this month. But if you ask me, the brewery’s very best beers are its spicy, chili-infused creations. The Citra Hot Blonde was one of our top 10 beers in 2013, and the Cerveza Negra Caliente might follow suit. This dark beer has the beautiful color and subdued maltiness of fresh-kegged Negra Modelo, plus some gentle, juicy heat from jalapeños and rounded depth from cacao nibs. Every sip begets the next—it’s dangerously poundable. Chili peppers are a lot cheaper than hops, Brown told me. So why not sell off his contracted hops, and roll out a line of hot craft creations? Recommended. MARTIN CIZMAR.



RED AND HAIRY: Inside Jamison Square’s new lobster house.

Boiled Over

foam on the side (neither mentioned on the menu) “go surprisingly well together.” After trying this grotesque curiosity, I’d agree, but only to the extent BY MICHAEL C. ZUSMAN both are yellow. The “ginger-kaffir lime brined Geographically, Jamison Square should be a pork tenderloin” ($15) is, too, a total shipwreck. prime spot for an upscale restaurant. The Pearl The disharmonious components were nothing may be soulless, but there are lots of neighbors like their billing—instead, the dish was dominated with plenty of money and small kitchens. And by an abundance of basil and acrid “leek coffee yet, the newish Hairy Lobster is the third spot to ash,” which might as well be code for burnt coffee land at the north edge of Jamison Square, where grounds. On the dessert menu, avoid the sticky the fancy, Francophonic Fenouil flopped. Prime toffee pudding ($10). Served simply, this earthypatio season is coming, but I worry about the sweet cake might be humble and lovable. Here the Lobster’s long-range prospects. ruinous pileup of superfluous components includes From the bizarre moniker—no one likes to gold leaf, celery leaves, caramel sauce, spicy candied eat hair—to dissonant decor and furnishings, but pecans, a possible bagel chip and vanilla ice cream. especially to the freeform stream If Uncle Earl from Iowa of disconnected, disconcerting hits town this summer and dishes, multiple visits yielded insists on a great patio spot in only bewilderment. the Pearl, go ahead and cushion On arrival, you’ll notice the alcohol with the red flan“THL” emblazoned on the nel confit duck hash ($16). It’s foyer wall and menus. A blue pretty much self-explanatory wall stocked with a collection of and decent, as are the chicken door knockers is the incongruLemon chiffon pie fried shrimp ($13), which are ous backdrop for two hostesses imbued with the magic of batter busily tapping their computerized seating map. In and the deep fryer. The caramelized lamb ($18) is my case—once with a reservation, twice without— also fine—notwithstanding the thick rim of fat on comfy banquettes or a cozy spot next to one of the the rosy slices of meat and the absence of anything Fenouil-era fireplaces proved elusive. Instead, I that might fairly be called caramelization. got a rustic wood-and-steel stool that would have Nothing quite encapsulates the Hairy Lobster benefited from a second stool to climb up to it. The experience more than this: At the end of my third stools along with abundant distressed barnwood (and final) visit, my dining companion and I ponon the walls comprise the vestigial remains of the dered whether to order a chocolate dessert or the restaurant’s most recent tenant, Jamison. lemon chiffon pie ($10). Our irrepressibly efferIn addition to the array of door knockers, the vescent server recommended the latter because, new operators have added a disconcerting portrait she said, “it’s not just a dessert, it’s a work of art.” of a saucy redhead working a stovetop, her peek-aWhen it arrived, I understood. boo posterior revealed by a lobster clawing at the Along with the lightly lemoned cuboid of cake, back of her slinky green dress. In another twist, the dish featured green dots of cilantro-flavored all the modernist-tilting meals are served on the gel, shards of bitter cilantro-flavored meringue, owners’ vast collection of vintage floral dishware. quenelles of cassis-ginger sorbet plus a bunch The trappings at THL feel nearly normal com- more shards, dots, crumbs and even tiny pâte pared to the food. The menu is divided into three feuilletée butterflies. This bizarre dish made main categories, “Water,” “Garden” and “Barn.” me think of the landscape at Disneyland’s It’s A Be especially wary of the water. Small World ride, and like so much else here, it In hindsight, my server might have been dis- was more a showpiece than a meal. creetly trying to warn me off the signature Maine lobster Cubano ($19) when he observed that the EAT: The Hairy Lobster, 900 NW 11th Ave., 971-229-1166, 5-10 pm vanilla-scented cornbread and the mass of mustard Tuesday-Saturday, 5-9 pm Sunday.


Willamette Week MAY 25, 2016



Willamette Week MAY 25, 2016

Willamette Week MAY 25, 2016


BY R U S S E L L “ B I G



Allies AND Enemies


A glossary of selected Juggalo terms. Assed out: Broke. Blue neck: When a Juggalo rocks so hard at the Carnival his makeup starts to run down his neck. Chicken: A redneck. Always offered as an insult. Dark Carnival: The mythology that stretches across most of ICP’s discography, depicting an afterlife in which souls go to a limbolike space and are judged for their individual actions. Faygo: The inexpensive Michigan-made soft drink of choice for Juggalos. Gangslang: A group of punk-ass bitches talkin’ shit about your Juggalettes. Hatchet: The icon representing Psychopathic Records, where all the real Juggalos are signed. Juggalette: Female Juggalo. Juggalo: See “What Is a Juggalo?”

ICE CUBE The sometimes rapper and star of Friday After Next, Are We There Yet? and Janky Promoters performed at the Gathering in 2011.

DISNEY Owned Hollywood Records, which pulled the release of The Great Milenko, canceled ICP’s tour and terminated its contract. The album was later picked up by Island Records.

VANILLA ICE The one-hit wonder turned house-flipper signed with Insane Clown Posse’s label, Psychopathic Records, in 2011. Happily, Violent J has not dangled him from a hotel balcony by his ankles.

EMINEM Promoted ICP as performers for a party he was hosting before actually asking them to play. This started a yearslong feud that has led to multiple assaults and insults.

KID ROCK The White Trash Elvis is featured on the ICP track “Is That You?”

BEASTIE BOYS Allegedly tried to have ICP remove the line “fuck the Beastie Boys and the Dalai Lama” in a song called “Fuck the World.” (But, seriously, fuck the Beastie Boys.)

JACK WHITE A former critic of hip-hop, White commissioned ICP to record a raprock cover of a Mozart song and released it through his Third Man Records label. This actually happened, we swear.

SHARON OSBOURNE Filed a lawsuit against ICP for kicking Coal Chamber—a band she managed at the time—off a tour.

—“Oh, he gets butt-naked/ And then he walks through the streets/ Winking at the freaks/ With a two-liter stuck in his butt-cheeks”

’Lo love: Short for “Juggalo love.” MMFWCL: A Juggalo greeting meaning “much motherfucking wicked clown love.” Neden: Vagina. Ninja: “Bro,” “dude” or “man.” Nurdle: A bowel movement, as in, “Ninja, I gotta go have a nurdle. Richie: A wealthy person. Whoop Whoop: How to say “What’s up?” to other Juggalos.

Which Psychopathic Records artist is which?

1. Blaze Ya Dead Homie 2. Jamie Spaniolo 3. Dark Lotus 4. Big Hoodoo 5. Anybody Killa 6. Paul Methric 7. Shaggy 2 Dope 8. Violent J


Sometime in the mid-’80s Joseph Bruce (Violent J) and Joseph Utsler (Shaggy 2 Dope) meet in Oak Park, a suburb of Detroit.


Sometime in 1989 The future ICP releases a single called “Party at the Top of the Hill” under the name JJ Boys.

Sometime in 1990 Violent J does time for death threats and robbery, then begins a career in professional wrestling. He becomes friends with Rob Van Dam and Sabu but leaves the industry later the same year.



Sometime in 1991 Violent J and Shaggy 2 Dope release their first self-produced EP, Dog Beats, under the name Inner City Posse. Local radio stations refuse to play the record— allegedly because the group is white. Inner City Posse changes its name to Insane Clown Posse, adopting a horrorcore aesthetic.



Oct. 18, 1992 ICP releases its first album, Carnival of Carnage, featuring Detroit rappers Kid Rock and Esham. It also features the only appearance of John Utsler (aka John Kickjazz), Shaggy’s older brother and an original member of the group. Utsler, a heroin addict, later takes sporadic work in the group’s warehouse before dying of a seizure in 2015.

‘94 Sometime in 1993 Between the release of the Beverly Kills 50187 EP and Ringmaster, Violent J first refers to ICP fans as “Juggalos.”

‘95 March 8, 1994 Ringmaster is released, marking the first ICP album to be fully produced by Psychopathic Records house producer Mike E. Clark. At some point that year, the band makes a habit of spraying crowds with Faygo soda.


‘97 Oct. 10, 1995 Long-standing fan favorite Riddle Box is released.

Aug. 12, 1997 After having its contract with Disney-owned Hollywood Records terminated, The Great Milenko is finally released on Island Records.

From: “What Is a Juggalo?” by Insane Clown Posse


“There’s Portland Juggalo Family, and then the fucking Juggahoes saying they’re us threatening those businesses [using fliers posted on gentrifying North Williams Avenue]. If I found them I would break their fucking jaws. Then there’s the independents, which all do their own thing. Sorry for the Juggahoe thing—that shit ain’t Juggalos.”


—“A Hulkamaniac/ He powerbombs motherfuckers into thumbtacks/ People like him till they find out he’s unstable/ He Sabu’d your momma through a coffee table”

Ryda: A down-ass Juggalo or Juggalette who’ll ride-or-die you.

Posse Time Mid-’80s

—“He just don’t care/ He might try to put a weave/ In his nut hair /’Cuz he could give a fuck less/ What a bitch thinks/ He tell her that her butt stinks/ And all that” —“He drinks like a fish/ And then he starts huggin’ people/ Like a drunk bitch/ Next thing, he’s pickin’ fights/ With his best friends/ Then he starts with the huggin’ again”

These muthafuckin’ Faygos are tearing up my ass.”

Quoted Wicked Ryda of the Portland Juggalo Family on Portland’s Juggalo factions and tensions caused by North Portland gentrification.

magnetic field, and boom—magnetism. The theory from classical physics states that magnetic fields are clouds of energy that surround magnetic particles and pull in or push away other magnetic objects. But there is another theory in quantum mechanics that electrons actually emit undetectable particles that tell other objects to move away or come closer. The verdict is still out. So until further notice, motherfucking magnets are indeed a miracle.

What Is a Juggalo?

Juggaho: Fake-ass Juggalo.

FBI Classified “Juggalos” as a gang.

Insane Clown Posse wasn’t necessarily wrong categorizing magnets as “miracles,” because science still doesn’t quite understand them. We know that magnetism happens because of magnetic fields created by moving charged particles—usually electrons. Every atom in an object generates a magnetic field, but they typically point in different directions, canceling one another out. If you line them up, though, they create a net

‘00 May 25, 1999 The Amazing Jeckel Brothers— featuring cameos by Ol’ Dirty Bastard and Snoop Dogg—is released.





July 1999 ICP performs at Woodstock 1999 and incites a melee by throwing $100 bills into the crowd of angry young men who showed up to hear Limp Bizkit. Compared to the other incidents of arson, property destruction and sexual assault at the festival, this is relatively tame.

July 2000 The first Gathering of the Juggalos is held in Novi, Mich., with aspirations of becoming a “Juggalo Woodstock.” The Gathering lasts two days and draws 7,000 people to the Expo Center for a weird weekend of rap and professional wrestling.



‘09 Nov. 5, 2002 The Wraith: Shangri-La—notable for acknowledging ICP’s belief in God—is released.

Aug. 31, 2004 Hell’s Pit, intended to illustrate the horrors of the infernal regions, is released.



Sept. 1, 2009 Bang! Bang! Pow!, featuring the infamous single “Miracles,” is released, bringing the group the most mainstream attention it’s received to date.

ANSWERS: Match the Faces



‘10 Aug. 12, 2010 The 11th annual Gathering takes place at CaveIn-Rock, Ill., with reality-TV star Tila Tequila as a headlining act. The crowd pelts her with objects from the stage, chasing her back to her SUV and smashing the windows.

1. D. 2. G. 3. C. 4. F. 5. E. 6. H. 7. A. 8. B.


RON JEREMY The famously hairy porn star has gathered with many Juggalos.

I L L U S T R AT I O N S B Y E L I S E E N G L E R T ; R U S S E L L H A U S F E L D ; R I C K V O D I C K A

Gathering of the Juggafacts The


Jan. 8, 2014 ICP files suit against the FBI after its fans are labeled a “loosely organized hybrid gang.”

‘16 May 31, 2016 ICP plays at the Hawthorne Theatre in Portland as part of its 2016 Riddle Box tour.

SEE IT: Insane Clown Posse

plays the Hawthorne Theatre, 1507 SE Cesar E. Chavez Blvd., with Young Wicked, DS8 and Knothead, on Tuesday, May 31. 6:30 pm. Sold out. All ages.

Willamette Week MAY 25, 2016




ready to finish


Open 7 days 503.284.0655 | 800 NE Broadway

Willamette Week MAY 25, 2016

MUSIC Editor: MATTHEW SINGER. TO BE CONSIDERED FOR LISTINGS, go to and follow submission directions. All shows should be submitted two weeks or more in advance of event. Press kits, CDs and especially vinyl can be sent to Music Desk, WW, 2220 NW Quimby St., Portland, OR 97210. Please include show or release date information with all physical mailings. Email: Fax: 243-1115.


= WW Pick. Highly recommended. Prices listed are sometimes for advance ticket sales. At-the-door increases and so-called convenience charges may apply. Event lineups are subject to change after WW’s press deadlines.

WEDNESDAY, MAY 25 Paul Simon

[SINGER-SONGWRITER] The term “cultural appropriation” might’ve been invented for Paul Simon’s music, going back to the Peruvian flutes of “El Condor Pasa” and the early-adopter reggae “Mother and Child Reunion.” Graceland pissed off some anti-apartheid activists on its way to becoming Oprah’s favorite album, and you can Google “Los Lobos Steve Berlin” alongside Simon’s name for another sordid tale from its creation. Ever in search of fresh inspirational fodder, at least on the forthcoming Stranger to Stranger, he’s collaborating with Italian EDM artist Clap! Clap! and borrowing ideas from avant-garde composer Harry Partch, instead of more quasi-imperialist sonic plunder. JEFF ROSENBERG. Arlene Schnitzer Concert Hall, 1037 SW Broadway. 8 pm. $64.50-$134.50. All ages.

Tengger Cavalry Raid

[FOLK METAL] Tengger Cavalry Raid is often referred to as Mongolian metal, but that’s slightly misleading. The band was founded by guitarist and throat-singer Nature Ganganbaigal in Beijing back in 2010, but these days Tengger Cavalry is based in New York City and has enjoyed international acclaim from MTV, CNN and the Huffington Post for its blend of Mongolian folk music and mythology, incorporating traditional instruments with melodic, anthemic heavy metal. Ash Street offers a very intimate look at a highly unique band currently promoting its fourth album, 2015 game-changer Blood Sacrifice Shaman. NATHAN CARSON. Ash Street Saloon, 225 SW Ash St. 8 pm. $15. 21+.

THURSDAY, MAY 26 Macklemore & Ryan Lewis, Raz Simone

[GUILT RAP] Macklemore is trying really hard, y’all, and he wants everyone to know. Not since Nirvana has an artist seemingly felt so guilty about their success and worked so hard at every opportunity to apologize for it. His heart is usually in the right place, but dude is the rap game Jerry Gergich—well-meaning as he is, he can’t help ripping his pants and then falling into a pond while farting. That’s also an apt metaphor for his most recent album, This Unruly Mess I’ve Made. It’s not that bad, but it is indeed a total fucking mess, piling message raps atop earnest autobiography atop selfdirected handwringing atop cornball punchlines. The Macklemoriest moment is when he recommends his daughter read Langston Hughes and suggests A Raisin in the Sun, which sounds sweet…until you realize that’s not who wrote A Raisin in the Sun. Damn it, Jerry! MATTHEW SINGER. Veterans Memorial Coliseum, 300 N Winning Way. 8 pm. $39-50-$59.50. All ages.

CONT. on page 28

Savages SATURDAY, MAY 28 Three weeks after gunmen stormed the Bataclan in Paris last November and slaughtered 89 people at a rock concert, a band called Savages stood onstage 2 miles away and sang songs about love. Not the hippie-dippie, “shine on your brother” kind of love, or even really the romantic kind, but a raw, instinctual kind of love—the kind that gives life, inoculates against evil, and sounds best played loud and vicious. It was just the catharsis the audience needed. “It was really intense, that show,” says Savages drummer Fay Milton over the phone, on a break from record-shopping at home in London. “There were a lot of people crying. I think we were crying as well.” At the time, Savages was a month away from releasing its second album, Adore Life, and in a way, the Paris show affirmed the new direction the band was headed. When it debuted three years earlier, with the widely acclaimed Silence Yourself, it was as post-punk ice queens, raging against sexual violence and patriarchal oppression through hailstorms of cold, concentrated noise. With Adore Life, the instrumental attack hasn’t softened a bit, but the tone has shifted— from a band lashing out to one reaching inward, ripping open its chest and proclaiming, in no uncertain terms, that “love is the answer.” It’s a change directly inspired by the band’s desire to forge a greater communion with its audience. In the beginning, Savage’s chilly sound and steely stage presence didn’t exactly foster a sense of togetherness. Sheathed all in black, singer Jehnny Beth would assume a fighter’s stance, throwing jabs at the air and staring down the front row like Holly Holm preparing to kick an opponent’s head off. (The band would also post notices asking fans to refrain from using phones during concerts, a request they typically complied with, probably out of sheer intimidation.) Savages earned a reputation as one the world’s fiercest live acts, but the intensity proved distancing. “When we started with Silence Yourself, we would go onstage and be very confrontational,” Milton says. “For our first year or so, people would come and watch us but they would be looking at us like animals in a zoo almost, trying to work out what was going on.” As the band continued to tour, both the quartet and their fans came to see Savages shows as a form of collective release—what Milton describes as “a massive kind of party.” What that led to was not necessarily a kinder, gentler Savages, especially as the music itself is concerned: On Adore Life, Ayse Hassan’s bass remains at once sludgy and liquid, like magma sliding down the face of a volcano, and guitarist Gemma Thompson still emits sparks and cast shadows in equal measure. But it did cause Beth to open up more, in performance—she now often ventures into the crowd rather than just menacing them— and on record. Adore Life explores love in all its convolutions, from jealousy to lust, and comes to the conclusion that it’s worth it. It’s a bold stance for a band working in a genre whose antecedents compared love to a case of anthrax poisoning and declared “anger is an energy.” But while Savages might wear its influences unashamedly, the band members have come to reject the post-punk ideal of empowerment through negation. In fact, it almost offends them. “It’s always positivity,” Milton says, “for sure.” MATTHEW SINGER.

Finding love in a noisy place.

SEE IT: Savages plays Wonder Ballroom, 128 NE Russell St., with Head Wound City, on Saturday, May 28. 9 pm. $18.50 advance, $20 day of show. All ages. Willamette Week MAY 25, 2016





Vytell plays We Take Holocene on Wednesday, May 25. See our profile at

FRIDAY, MAY 27 Titus Andronicus, La Sera

[PURE PUNK] New Jersey’s Titus Andronicus has been at the punk forefront for over a decade now. While the band has made tweaks here and there as to what it means to be both noisy and conceptual, it has mainly delivered a consistent helping of raucous rock ’n’ roll that would be just as much at home today as it would be at CBGB in the ’70s. That balancing act hasn’t been easy on the band, with a former-member list that extends well into double digits. Last year, Titus Andronicus dropped The Most Lamentable Tragedy, its fourth studio album and possibly the closest thing to blazing indie rock it has approached thus far. MARK STOCK. Revolution Hall, 1300 SE Stark St., No. 110. 9 pm. $20. All ages.

Ginuwine, Karlos Farfar, Will Jordan

[R&B] Don’t worry, everyone: He’ll assuredly play “Pony,” and probably gyrate a little. Wonder Ballroom, 128 NE Russell St. 8 pm. $30-$75. All ages.


[WORKING STIFF] Labelmate of Elvis Costello, Nick Lowe and Ian Dury amid that first flowering of New Wave troubadours, Wreckless Eric could never quite credibly play the part of Angry Young Man, and the blending of punk dynamics with pop sensibilities proved rather less salable. In the U.K., the former Eric Goulden enjoyed his share of late-’70s fame—signature anthem “Whole Wide World” garnered a late-life boost from Will Ferrell’s Stranger Than Fiction warblings— but the 62-year-old has spent the past few decades immersed in a series of ramshackle passion projects. For AmERICa, his first solo album in nearly a dozen years, the Newhaven native tackles his adopted homeland through a typically joyous collection of off-kilter pub rock, shambling garage sing-alongs and incisive narratives about the roads less traveled. JAY HORTON. Turn! Turn! Turn!, 8 NE Killingsworth St. 8 pm. $8. 21+.


[OBLIQUE INDIE] Brooklyn’s Yeasayer has long been one of the most inventive bands in indie rock, wringing strangeness from the juxtaposition of spirituality and technology. Nowhere is that more apparent than on Amen & Goodbye, the group’s latest album, which encapsulates a band with no clear sense of direction. The psychpop LP ambles along, dotted with synth harpsichord and woodwinds, while trying to make sense of our modern political system amid a sea of atmospheric reverb and jumbled commentary that’s borderline religious. It’s spectacular when it’s digestible, sure. But sometimes the genre-hopping experimentation can leave you yearning for greater structure. I guess that’s what a back catalog is for. BRANDON WIDDER. Wonder Ballroom, 128 NE Russell St. 9 pm. $25.

Father, Lui Diamonds, Tommy Genesis


[WEIRD SOUTH] Atlanta’s Awful Records is the South’s answer to Odd Future, circa 2010. It’s a stable of young rappers and R&B performers that weaves mainstream braggadocio into a specific kind of youthful nihilism that walks the line between abstract and accessible. On his new album, I’m a Piece of Shit, Awful’s de facto leader, Father, raps in a subdued, almost monotonous drawl, suggesting thorough disillusionment with the drug-fueled lifestyle he ostensibly glorifies. He’s joined by labelmates Lui Diamonds and Tommy Genesis—just a dip into Awful’s deep bench of left-field talent. WALKER MACMURDO. The Analog Cafe, 720 SE Hawthorne Blvd. 4 pm. $17. All ages.

Willamette Week MAY 25, 2016

Wreckless Eric, Dusty Santamaria

[GOTH GODS] From the late 1970s to early ’80s, legendary U.K. goth pioneers the Cure released eight unassailable albums. And while the band has struggled to produce music of this depth and quality ever since, live reviews seem unanimous—the band still slays. More to the point, Robert Smith and company seem to revel in epiclength concerts that leave few stones unturned. Gigs on the current tour are stretching to 35 songs after five encores. Over the first six shows of this current tour, 70 different songs have been performed. It’s hard to imagine even the mopiest fan leaving this show unsatisfied. NATHAN CARSON. Sunlight Supply Amphitheater, 17200 NE Delfel Road, Ridgefield, Wash. 7 pm. $92.

The Cure, the Twilight Sad



The Twilight Sad, Completions

[POST-PUNK BUMMER JAMS] As Portland has a penchant for producing bands that reflect the city’s rainy melancholy, Scotland seems to have the same effect on its own populace across the pond. The Twilight Sad, a trio that formed outside Glasgow in the mid-2000s, is one of the leading Scottish bands in this parallel scene. Its music usually features a base level of acoustic folk rock but builds layer by layer, with shoegaze-inspired electric guitar droning and squealing synths mimicking Scottish squalls. HILARY SAUNDERS. Doug Fir Lounge, 830 E Burnside St., 2319663. 9 pm. $15. 21+.

TUESDAY, MAY 31 Tim Heidecker and His Ten Piece Band, JP INC

[FOR YOUR HEALTH] Best known as the dominant half of the comedic duo Tim and Eric, Tim Heidecker’s music career actually predated his other entertainment forays. As in his painfully awkward sketches and performances, lines dividing parody and abject realism are virtually nonexistent. On his recent LP, In Glendale, hokey, MOR radio rock is done convincingly enough to make your head itch, but whether or not the joke—if there is one—warrants being made at all (for nearly $30 a head) depends on if you get it. CRIS LANKENAU. Mississippi Studios, 3939 N Mississippi Ave. 7:30 pm. $28.50. 21+.

Kurt Vile and the Violators

[PRETTY PIMPIN] Philadelphia’s cosmic guitar wizard swings through Portland on his way to Sasquatch thanks to WavePDX, a group connecting volunteers with local nonprofits. Entry to tonight’s show is free, provided you complete two hours of volunteer service through their web site. Revolution Hall, 1300 SE Stark St. No. 110. 8 pm. See for ticket information. All ages.

Baroness, Youth Code

[DEATH-DEFYING METAL] Progmetal anthems have fallen out of favor in the past 30 years, but Southern heshers Baroness have been promoting a renaissance for more than a decade. Last year’s Purple is a dense and rewarding effort that inspires both fist-pumping and solemn meditation. It came after a serious bus accident that caused two full-time members to leave the group entirely, and seems to have inspired lead-baron John Baizley toward a tighter, more focused and melodic sound that’s as alluring as the strange paintings he makes for

their album covers. CRIS LANKENAU. Wonder Ballroom, 128 NE Russell St. 8 pm. $25. 21+.


[BYRD SONGS] Every August, Portland plays host to the world’s pre-eminent festival devoted to the magisterial choral music of England’s greatest Renaissance composer. But William Byrd, a contemporary of Shakespeare, wrote a lot more than choir music. Scholar-singer Kerry McCarthy, who plays a major role in the August festival, co-leads this concert by a group of early-music specialists, featuring Byrd’s consort music for voice and the quietly expressive but unfortunately archaic violas da gamba that dominated the chamber music of Byrd’s time and place. BRETT CAMPBELL. Trinity Episcopal Cathedral, 147 NW 18th Ave. 8 pm Friday, May 27. $20. All ages.

Portland State Man Choir, Vox Femina and University Choir

[PROTEST SONGS] Portland State’s choral programs are on a roll, winning international awards and major grants. This concert will show why director Ethan Sperry’s singers have achieved such success. The group displays not just purity and precision of sound but also fiery, youthful energy. This time, they’re singing songs from various traditions that protest violence, war and oppression while exalting the resisters. Prime percussionist Valerie Naranjo of the Saturday Night Live house band is guest drummmer. BRETT CAMPBELL. Lincoln Recital Hall at Portland State University, 1620 SW Park Ave. 7:30 pm Saturday, May 28. $15 general admission, $7 seniors and PSU students. All ages.

For more Music listings, visit



Kaytranada [ULTRALIGHT BEAM] When did pop music get so dour? While recent production trends in hip-hop and dance music have skewed moody (cough, Drake, cough), 23-year-old producer Louis Kevin Celestin is one of a handful of young pioneers sprinting in the opposite direction. Under the name Kaytranada, Celestin makes jubilant noise, and he’s become something of a SoundCloud “star” with a series of intoxicating remixes and DJ sets interpolating Janet Jackson and Amerie songs within transcendent house breakdowns. With 99.9%, he’s managed to do something even more monumental—craft a debut album as warm and joyous as the first sunny day of spring. 99.9% blends features from the likes of AlunaGeorge, Vic Mensa and Anderson .Paak with mind-bending drums (both programmed and played live courtesy of BadBadNotGood) and bright, airy synths. It’s dance music, sure, but using that blanket term undermines just how creative, exuberant and goddamn funky this music is. It’s the perfect summertime record, both as an anecdote to Views and a reason to keep partying all night long. MICHAEL MANNHEIMER. Euphoria Nightclub, 315 SE 3rd Ave. 10 pm Sunday, May 29. $20 advance, $25 day of show. 21+. Willamette Week MAY 25, 2016


Music Calendar Last Week Live

Editor: Matthew Singer. TO HAVE YOUR EVENT LISTED, send show information at least two weeks in advance on the web at Press kits, CDs and especially vinyl can be sent to Music Desk, WW, 2220 NW Quimby St., Portland, OR 97210. Please include show or release date information with all physical mailings. Email: For more listings, check out

The Secret Society

thomas teal

116 NE Russell St Pete Krebs and his Portland Playboys; The Weather Machine, Bart Budwig’s Amperband, Brad Parsons

Trinity Episcopal Cathedral

147 NW 18th Ave. Cascadia Viols


232 SW Ankeny St Gooo, James Curry IV, 1000TrashCans, Body Shame

White Eagle Saloon 836 N Russell St The Von Howlers

Wonder Ballroom

128 NE Russell St. Ginuwine, Karlos Farfar, Will Jordan

SAT. MAY 28 Alberta Street Pub

1036 NE Alberta St Jeremiah Clark & The Reasons Why

Alberta Street Pub 1036 NE Alberta St Ojos Feos, Wamba

FOOLED AGAIN: What a difference 27 years makes. Last time I saw The Who, it was 1989. Only Keith Moon was in the grave, and the band was just beginning to stoop and gray. During “My Generation,” Roger Daltrey sang, “Hope I die before I get older.” The Who was slated to hit Moda Center last year, but doctors ordered Daltrey to rest due to viral meningitis. He’s since recovered and looked in good health at the rescheduled show May 17. Pete Townshend also looked and played well. At 70, he’s still a rhythm guitar ace and affable on the mic. I want to keep saying nice things. But by the time they got to the group’s first major U.S. hit, “I Can See for Miles,” the lackluster energy—from the band and the audience—became impossible to ignore. The reality is that 50 years is a long time to play music. Perhaps it works for an old bluesman to play until he falls off his chair, but for a band that made its name on vitality, explosive performances and smashed equipment, this was a very tame, state fair-level gig. Nothing was terribly off. The backing musicians were fantastic—especially the vocal harmonies provided by all the keyboard players. Pino Palladino’s bass work was superb. Daltrey was generally in key, even if his reflexes had a tough time keeping up with his classic mic-swings. In particular, Zak Starkey threw down a truly climactic (and brief) drum solo during the finale of “Won’t Get Fooled Again.” But in the end, there was no encore. The audience didn’t deserve it. They perked up for “Pinball Wizard” and sang along to “Baba O’Riley,” but the only teenagers they know in this wasteland are their grandchildren. NATHAN CARSON. = WW Pick. Highly recommended.

WED. MAY 25 Alberta Street Pub

1036 NE Alberta St Brad Parsons & The Local Talent, The Sam Chase, MAITA

Arlene Schnitzer Concert Hall

1037 SW Broadway Paul Simon

Ash Street Saloon

225 SW Ash St Tengger Cavalry Raid

Bunk Bar

1028 SE Water Ave. Pony Time, Deathlist


1001 SE Morrison St. We Take Holocene #3

LaurelThirst Public House

2958 NE Glisan St Ducky Pig; Hilary Scott

Mississippi Studios

3939 N Mississippi Ave. The Wild Reeds

Roseland Theater

8 NW 6th Ave Mac DeMarco, James Ferraro

Star Theater

13 NW 6th Ave. Cody Blackbird

Wonder Ballroom 128 NE Russell St.


Brian Jonestown Massacre, Federale

THUrs. MAY 26 Alberta Street Pub

1036 NE Alberta St Bad Mitten Orchestre, Corwin Bolt and the Wingnuts

Duff’s Garage

2530 NE 82nd Ave Spirit of 206

High Water Mark Lounge

6800 NE MLK Ave Atriarch, Taurus, The Blood Of Others


1001 SE Morrison St. Tamaryn, Tender Age, DJ Honey O

Jimmy Mak’s

Thong, Mood Beach, Butter, The Super Secret Hot Girls Club

The Secret Society

116 NE Russell St Baby & The Pearl Blowers, Stumptown Swing


232 SW Ankeny St A Certain Smile with Airport, Brakemouth

Veterans Memorial Coliseum

300 N Winning Way Macklemore & Ryan Lewis, Raz Simone

White Eagle Saloon

836 N Russell St Kelsey Mousley and Blind J. Wakins


221 NW 10th Ave. Chance Hayden; Mel Brown B3 Organ Group

Alberta Street Pub

LaurelThirst Public House


2958 NE Glisan St Jon Ostrom Band and Tate Peterson; Lewi Longmire & the Left Coast Roasters

Mississippi Studios

3939 N Mississippi Ave. King Gizzard and the Lizard Wizard, the Murlocs, Sun Angle

The Analog Cafe

720 SE Hawthorne Blvd.

Willamette Week MAY 25, 2016

1036 NE Alberta St Merridian, Matt Buetow 350 West Burnside Eve 6

Doug Fir Lounge

830 E Burnside St. Autolux, Eureka The Butcher

Duff’s Garage

2530 NE 82nd Ave Organic Acid

Hawthorne Theatre

1507 SE César E. Chávez Blvd. Prong; Earth Anchor

High Water Mark Lounge 6800 NE MLK Ave Endorphins Lost, Vastation, Immoral Majority


1001 SE Morrison St. School of Rock Portland & Genders play Rilo Kiley

Jimmy Mak’s

221 NW 10th Ave. Saeeda Wright

Kelly’s Olympian

426 SW Washington St. Speaker Minds, Free Thought Takeover

LaurelThirst Public House

2958 NE Glisan St Kory Quinn & the Quinntesentials; Lynn Conover & Little Sue

Mississippi Studios

3939 N Mississippi Ave. King Gizzard and the Lizard Wizard, the Murlocs, Bombay Beach

Revolution Hall

Arlene Schnitzer Concert Hall

1037 SW Broadway Leon Bridges

Ash Street Saloon 225 SW Ash St King Ghidora

2026 NE Alberta St Marion Walker, Divers, Strangeweather

8 NE Killingsworth St The Toads, Daisy Deaths, Lord Becky

White Eagle Saloon

836 N Russell St Size 85 High Tops with New Social Outcasts, Jack Mortensen Band, and Shadows of the Revolution

Wonder Ballroom

128 NE Russell St. Savages

SUN. MAY 29 Crystal Ballroom

1332 W Burnside St Matt Corby

Duff’s Garage

2530 NE 82nd Ave Bakersfield Rejects; Rosco Brothers

2530 NE 82nd Ave Rosco Brothers

Hawthorne Theatre

1507 SE César E. Chávez Blvd. Oddisee, Serge Severe, Big Mo

Jimmy Mak’s

221 NW 10th Ave. Sabroso

LaurelThirst Public House

2958 NE Glisan St Bullets and Belles, The Talbott Brothers; The Yellers; Billy Kennedy

Lincoln Recital Hall at Portland State University

1620 SW Park Ave. Portland State Man Choir, Vox Femina and University Choir

Mississippi Studios

6800 NE MLK Ave Mania, Huldrekall, Withering of Light, Hail


2958 NE Glisan St Freak Mountain Ramblers

Mississippi Pizza

3552 N Mississippi Ave Harbor


600 E Burnside St Rio Grands, Sinless

Star Theater

13 NW 6th Ave. Witchburn, Zero Down and Queen Chief

The Analog Cafe

720 SE Hawthorne Blvd. War Machine, Transtorno; Plastic Pets, Mane of the Cur, and Hot Won’t Quit

The Know

2026 NE Alberta St Peach Kelli Pop, Patsy’s Rats, Honey Bucket

Turn! Turn! Turn!

Revolution Hall


13 NW 6th Ave. Scott Pemberton

Sunlight Supply Amphitheater

17200 NE Delfel Rd, Ridgefield, WA The Cure, the Twilight Sad

The Analog Cafe

720 SE Hawthorne Blvd. Father, Lui Diamonds, Tommy Genesis

The Firkin Tavern

2026 NE Alberta St Smoke Rings, Animyst, The Bedrooms, Sea Charms

The Liquor Store

3341 SE Belmont St, Mr. Len, Rev Shines

The Old Church 1422 SW 11th Ave

1507 SE César E. Chávez Blvd. Insane Clown Posse

White Eagle Saloon

Jimmy Mak’s

836 N Russell St Hutson and Calliope Musicals

TUEs. MAY 31 Arlene Schnitzer Concert Hall

1037 SW Broadway The Lumineers, SOAK

Beacon Sound

3636 N Mississippi Ave Lau Nau, (Visible) Cloaks, DJ Galaxy My Dear

Bossanova Ballroom

722 E Burnside St. Anti-Nowhere League, Chartbusters, The Whiskey Dickers, Bomb Squad


350 West Burnside The Obsessed, Karma to Burn, the Atomic Bitchwax, Sons of Huns

221 NW 10th Ave. AJAM; Mel Brown Septet

LaurelThirst Public House

2958 NE Glisan St Jackstraw; Dylan DiSalvio

Mississippi Studios

3939 N Mississippi Ave. Tim Heidecker and His Ten Piece Band, JP INC

Revolution Hall

1300 SE Stark St #110 Kurt Vile & The Violators

The Analog Cafe

720 SE Hawthorne Blvd. Strangers You Know; Ultra Magnetic

Wonder Ballroom

128 NE Russell St. Baroness, Youth Code

High Water Mark Lounge

3939 N Mississippi Ave. The Coup

Star Theater

Hawthorne Theatre

2026 NE Alberta St Vasas, The Minders, Landlines

Euphoria Nightclub

8 NE Killingsworth St Wreckless Eric, Dusty Santamaria

1300 SE Stark St #110 Chelsea Wolfe, A Dead Forest Index

The Know

315 SE 3rd Ave Kaytranada

LaurelThirst Public House

The Know

The Know

Turn! Turn! Turn!

Duff’s Garage

1332 W Burnside St Saint Motel

Roseland Theater

720 SE Hawthorne Blvd. The So So Glos, Dirty Nil

116 NE Russell St The Git Rights Gospel Revue, The Low Bones, Rakes; Get Rhythm

1001 SE Morrison St. Kevin Garrett, My Body, Calm Candy

1937 SE 11th Ave Challenger 70, Cartoon Spirit, The Familiar Names

The Analog Cafe

The Secret Society

Crystal Ballroom

1300 SE Stark St #110 Titus Andronicus, La Sera 8 NW 6th Ave Purity Ring

Mbrascatu, Luz Elena Mendoza

[MAY 25-31]

232 SW Ankeny St YARDSSS, Wrtch

Wonder Ballroom 128 NE Russell St. Yeasayer

MON. MAY 30 Dante’s

350 West Burnside Karaoke From Hell

Doug Fir Lounge 830 E Burnside St. The Twilight Sad, Completions

Jimmy Mak’s

221 NW 10th Ave. Dan Balmer Trio

LaurelThirst Public House 2958 NE Glisan St Kung Pao Chickens; Portland Country Underground

Revolution Hall

1300 SE Stark St #110 Kaleo

WED. MAY 25 Crush Bar

1400 SE Morrison 2016 Six Feet Under Dress-Up Party

Ground Kontrol

511 NW Couch St. TRONix (electronica)

THUrs. MAY 26 Dig A Pony

736 SE Grand Ave. Discogs & present For The Record!

The Embers Avenue 100 NW Broadway Thursday Electronic

The Liquor Store

3341 SE Belmont St, Wake The Town (bass music)

FRI. MAY 27 Black Book

20 NW 3rd Ave The Cave


1001 SE Morrison St. SNAP! ‘90s Dance Party

Jack London Bar

529 SW 4th Ave. Decadent 80s (new wave, synthpop, dance)

Killingsworth Dynasty

832 N Killingsworth St Paper: Sean Pierce, Bloom Offering, DJ Wax/Wane


3967 N. Mississippi Ave. Monkeytek & Friends (Jamaican vinyl)

Star Bar

639 Southeast Morrison St. DJ Truhn Juice

The Goodfoot

2845 SE Stark St Soul Stew (funk, soul, disco)

The Liquor Store

3341 SE Belmont St, Flight (acid house)

SAT. MAY 28 Crystal Ballroom

1332 W Burnside St 80s Video Dance Attack: New Wave Edition


1001 SE Morrison St.

Marcus Marr, DJs Kiffo & Rymes

Killingsworth Dynasty 832 N Killingsworth St Soul A Go-Go (soul, mod, R&B)


3967 N. Mississippi Ave. Lamar LeRoy (hip hop, 90s on up)

The Analog Cafe

720 SE Hawthorne Blvd. ANDAZ Bhangra Bollywood Dance Party

The Lovecraft Bar 421 SE Grand Ave Darkness Descends (deathrock, 80s, new wave)

SUN. MAY 29 Dig A Pony

736 SE Grand Ave. Do Right Sunday (rap, electro, R&B)

The Lovecraft Bar

421 SE Grand Ave Blue Sunday (new wave, synthpop, post-punk)

MON. MAY 30 Ground Kontrol

511 NW Couch St. Reagan-o-mix (new wave, hip-hop, soundtrack)


1001 SE Morrison St. Toro Y Moi, Nosaj Thing (DJ sets), DJ Nathan Detroit

TUEs. MAY 31 Black Book

20 NW 3rd Ave Turnt Up Tuesdays


1001 SE Morrison St. Taking Back Tuesday (emo, high school)

The Embers Avenue

100 NW Broadway Recycle (goth, industrial)

The Lovecraft Bar

421 SE Grand Ave BONES (dark dance, goth, electronic)


18 NW 3rd Ave. Tubesdays



GILBERT AND HAROLD: The Mt. Scott Community Center has water slides and a roller rink, but the real spirit of the Mount Scott neighborhood seems to reside at the Old Gilbert Road Tavern (5501 SE 72nd Ave.,, which is located on Harold Street. In a residential crack between FoPo and Woodstock, the Gilbert Road is a rough-and-tumble, three-room space with a vaguely Masonic logo, a world of attitudinal kitsch on the walls, and pool tables in the back. Multiple avatars of Bernie Sanders preside over the middle room, the Champagne cocktail menu on each table declares bubbly to be “classy as fuck,” and there’s two guys out front reading graphic novels and two more at the bar discussing their careers in animation. On any given night, the stage might feature local folk-punk, a reading event devoted to the apocalypse, or a monthly Gilbert Road Grotesque bizarro night emceed by a woman dressed like a monkey. On a recent night, the cook making the chili dog special and the five varieties of “chicken stripper” sandwich had a neck tattoo and seemed to know everyone’s name. He was playing good cop for the gruff bartender, who stared at newcomers like they were made of farts but served decent beer like Pfriem and the new grapefruit gose from Ecliptic. But whatever got into Mount Scott’s water out here, it’s got plenty of fellow feeling. As the Blazers’ season drained out on the TV with another bucket from Steph Curry, a guy in the back called out to thank the team for the season, and the whole bar clapped. MATTHEW KORFHAGE. 3. Shift Drinks

Where to drink this week. 1. Skyline Tavern

8031 NW Skyline Blvd., 503-286-4788, Skyline Tavern, our 2016 Bar of the Year, is a singular mountain vacation within Portland city limits—an old roadhouse dive with a back patio looking out on trees and more trees, a barbecue out back and, lately, a credit-card reader and a great beer list.

2. Quarterworld

4811 SE Hawthorne Blvd., 503-236-2454. Quarterworld is slowly coming together—after a start that seemed a little unfinished. The newest addition? A giant goddamn Tesla coil like the one in every supervillain’s lair. Except this one, named Tessie, plays the Super Mario theme in time to flashing lights.

1200 SW Morrison St., 503-922-3933, Shift Drinks is a very smart bar, with very strong drinks, very good service and very idiosyncratic wines. It is, perhaps, the only westside drinkery we can trust to keep its cool even on a Saturday.

4. Toffee Club

1006 SE Hawthorne Blvd., 971-254-9518, English—and occasional Timbers— soccer bar Toffee Club can seem half-filled-in in places, but where else can you eat bangers and mash and down a Fuller’s while watching a backroom projection of an Everton game with a soccer ball bigger than any human head?

5. Common Law

126 SW 2nd Ave. Pine Street Market is full of weird ideas about what to drink. Alone among the eateries, Common Law is full of very good ideas about what to drink—including a turmericcoconut milk gin drink that is a marvel of delicacy.

Willamette Week MAY 25, 2016



No Cover Charge

Karaoke nightly till 2:30am

(503) 234-6171 3390 NE Sandy Blvd 535 NE Columbia Blvd






Willamette Week MAY 25, 2016




PAT R I C K W E I S H A M P E L / B L A N K E Y E .T V

PERFORMANCE = WW Pick. Highly recommended. Most prices listed are for advance ticket sales. At-the-door increases and so-called convenience charges may apply, so it’s best to call ahead. Editor: ENID SPITZ. Theater: ENID SPITZ ( Dance: ENID SPITZ ( TO BE CONSIDERED FOR LISTINGS, submit information at least two weeks in advance to:


Speculative Drama takes on Alan Bowne’s terrifying, disturbing postapocalyptic love story. Inspired by the AIDS epidemic of the 1980s, the play follows one woman’s journey behind the quarantine line amid a devastating epidemic in order to reunite with the man she loves. Expect a few jokes and a lot of sexual tension. The Steep And Thorny Way To Heaven, Southeast 2nd Avenue and Hawthorne Boulevard, 8 pm Friday-Sunday, May 27-June 4. 7 pm show Friday, June 3. $10-$50.

Circus Oddity: A David Bowie Tribute

Veteran and student circus performers will be soaring around the rafters of Curious Comedy Theater for Circus Oddities: A David Bowie Tribute. Highflying acrobatics and aerial dance choreographed to the late, great singersongwriter’s music will be the spectacle of the evening. The performance will include members from circus groups throughout Portland, including Sir Cupcake’s Queer Circus, Just Movement, Night Flight, Prismagic, M.F. Motion and Speculative Drama. It’s a wonder why people don’t pair musical performance with circus antics more often. Curious Comedy Theater, 5225 NE Martin Luther King Jr. Blvd., 503-477-9477. 7 pm Wednesday, May 25. $18.

Free Speech

Uncensored story time with a feminist slant takes over posh tomboy boutique Wildfang once a month. Round 3 features ladies from W+K, local runner/baker Karolyn Tran and Judge Adrienne Nelson. Pop a PBR and purchase a signature Tomboy tee to benefit Planned Parenthood. Wildfang West, 404 SW 10th Ave., 503-964-6746. 7 pm Wednesday, May 25. $10, free with Wildfang purchase in the last 30 days.

Live Wire featuring Chris Thile, Dave Hill, the Wild Reeds

NPR’s beloved staple, A Prairie Home Companion, has a new host taking over Garrison Keillor’s spot, and he will be the guest of honor at Live Wire! Chris Thile, the Nickel Creek and Punch Brothers collaborator, will talk about what he has in store for Lake Wobegon’s future as the fictional town’s newest spokesman. What will the show be like now that Keillor is gone? Are we losing characters like Dusty the cowboy and Guy Noir? Hopefully, Thile has some satisfactory answers for the public at this live recording session. Mississippi Studios, 3939 N. Mississippi Ave., 503-228-3895. 7 pm Wednesday, May 25. $20-$40. 21+.


Before killing six people and injuring 14 others in a 2014 rampage in Isla Vista, Elliot Rodger wrote a 150-page manifesto. For this gender-bending performance, three local actors turned Rodger’s misogynistic ideas into a script, using only his words, verbatim. Performed inside a therapist’s office on Southeast Belmont Street that seats 20, the show tackles masculinity and social violence. Expect an experimental, monologue-driven show, more of a reading than a spectacle, from creator Sam Reiter, who proved her world-building chops at this year’s Fertile Ground Festival with a shadow-puppet staging of Russian fairy tales. The Belmont Center, 3804 SE Belmont St., 7 and 9 pm Thursday-Saturday, May 26-28. $12.

Sexploitation! A Cabaret Tribute to John Waters

Go Go Rocket Productions’ third annual Sexploitation! A Cabaret Tribute to John Waters promises a night filled with “dance offs,” “tea bagging,” “burlesque” and “live on-stage births.” To some, this may sound like the last place you want to spend your evening. But for anyone among raunchy director John Waters’ cult following, this is the perfect amount of crazy for a Thursday night. Star Theater, 13 NW 6th Ave., 9 pm Thursday, May 26. $12-$25. 21+.

NEW REVIEWS Francesca, Isabella, Margarita on a Cloud

In Carol Triffle’s latest eccentric musictheatre piece, three Southern sisters spill their fame-shame moments, from backstage at a Tiny Miss pageant or accidentally naked on camera. Francesca, the smart one, inherited her childhood home for playing the loser in her parent’s pageant scam and now begrudgingly rents rooms to her sisters. Like a wornout dollhouse, the set features faded pastels, protruding corners, painted appliances and uncanny doors good for revolving entrances and exits. The Portland-famous Megan Skye Hale keeps her considerable energy contained for this role, the stump to her sister’s swinging branches. Isabella (Elizabeth Fagan) returns from Albuquerque where she acted in an art film, or a “sensitive scene,” or yeah, porn. She flops and flails, dropping polaroids and fishing for praise. She is no match for Margarita (Anne Sorce), who has endless energy for self-aggrandizing, often using the top of the kitchen table as her pedestal and dishing scornful affection to her admirer, Bob the Weatherman (Sean Bowie), who dedicates each bizarre broadcast to her beauty. Exposition drags the play down, but its exaggerated physicality and quirky humor earns the applause. JESS DRAKE. Imago Theatre, 17 SE 8th Ave., 231-9581 . Friday. Free.


Action/Adventure’s original crime drama hits the perfect pitch, drawing out the seedy, shadowy side of Portland’s central eastside like a lone saxophone. Richard E. Moore’s musical score sustains the suspense with wandering piano and haunting trumpet melodies, the white-washed set morphs elegantly with parallel sliding panels upstage and video projections give a glimpse of our detective’s Google research. Zoë Rudman as Anne Winters has the smarts, the insomnia and the drinking habit of all great sleuths. Androgynous in tailored vest, disheveled button up and chucks, Winters attracts all types: femme fatale (Jade Hobbs), “good cop” (Andy Haftkowycz), corporate gatekeeper (Michael Zimmer) and other cinematic characters who hire, help or haunt the case. Hawthorne follows a loaded missing persons case: Anne’s ex, Tom (Jake Simonds), disappears, leaving his petite fiancé (Beth Summers) alone managing a vintage shop with $2500 “antique” American Girl dolls on the shelf and suspicious funding sources. Gripped by guilt, Anne siphons support from her bartender sister (Ellery Jessen) who offers reassurance like “you’re a person more often then you’re not.” The subtext: don’t be a dick just because you’re a dick. The real mystery here is how to heal from hurt enough to be human. JESS DRAKE. Action/ Adventure Theatre, 1050 SE Clinton St. 8 pm Thursday-Sunday, May 12-June 4. $15-$18.

ELYSIAN FIELDS: Demetrius Grosse and Kristen Adele.



Demetrius Grosse, a gargantuan column of muscle definition and sweat-licked skin, dominates Portland Center Stage’s A Streetcar Named Desire as theater’s most well-known abuser, Stanley Kowalski. He slumps against an oxidizing street pole, strikes a match on the metal and blows cigarette smoke in two bullish jets from his nostrils before flicking the used match into the audience in one of the play’s best moments. Blink and you’ll miss it, though. The entire production is a perfectly cast and detailoriented take on Tennessee Williams’ classic, but for all its spilled beer and broken glass, PCS’s posh Pearl theater can’t achieve true grit. As one of our wealthiest theaters, PCS can afford Equity talent, extras, a warehouse of costumes, and sets by award winners like New York’s G.W. Mercier. Streetcar brings it all. But too many theatrical tricks distract from the show’s biggest asset—the cast. Alongside Grosse’s monolith of masculinity, Kristen Adele is the ideal Stella—a wide-eyed young wife frosting cakes and tidying. She looks at home in lace-collared pinafores, bare feet and a hairstyle like Dorothy’s in Oz. The addled Blanche, on the other hand, is an explosion of manic energy as played by NAACP award-winner Deidrie Henry, who tromps after Stella in towering heels and a red dressing

The Skin of Our Teeth

Thornton Wilder’s 1943 Pulitzer-winner is a farcical, fourth-wall-breaking rumination on the endless cycle of human suffering. The play is a mixture of poignant insight and lighthearted, irreverent playfulness. Each character represents a key aspect of humanity— whether it be the “secrets only known to women” or the roots of anger and war—which plays a part in our species’ historic succession of learning, building, destroying, then rebuilding. All of this staged around a mid-century suburban home and the Antrobus family who reside there. If all of this sounds a tad convoluted, that’s because it is. The actors (particularly Sara Hennessy’s sassy character, Sabina) hilariously break character throughout the play to let the audience know that they think so too. But, with three acts and a run time of about two hours and 40 minutes, the initially confusing dynamics of the production make total sense by the end. Watch the Antrobus family struggle through catastrophes that

gown. Blanche rarely sits still, scouring cabinets for liquor, fussing with her crimped hair and wordvomiting melodramatic monologues. Like sardines, the characters pack into the tworoom set, a dilapidated French Quarter apartment with crumbling plaster. That filth was costly. Mercier commissioned a New Orleans metalworker for the authentic second-story balcony. He hung a glittering chandelier in the drab kitchen, and the translucent walls let you glimpse neighbors passing or a woman hawking flowers in the background. The upside to a decadent production is the audience never gets bored. There’s always an extra to watch, a costume change to judge, a jazz riff punctuating dialogue or a prostitute lighting up in the wings. Restraint wouldn’t hurt here. Jazz blasts, lights strobe and extras swarm onstage during what should be a subtle scene change. Eunice and Steve making out on the balcony distract from Blanche’s nuanced meltdown, and it’s hard to appreciate Stanley when he’s constantly changing shirts or dodging props. Streetcar closes the PCS season with light tricks and star power, in a fussy version of a play about destitution, insanity and rape. Watch for the quiet moments, which deliver the most. ENID SPITZ. SEE IT: Streetcar Named Desire is at Portland Center Stage, 128 NW 11th Ave., 503-445-3700. 7:30 pm Tuesday-Wednesday and Friday; noon and 7:30 pm Thursday; 2 and 7:30 pm Saturday-Sunday. Through June 19. $25-$75.

have rocked the human race, such as ice ages, floods and devastating war. This family, as a face for our species, continually pushes on, miraculously saved each time by the skin of their teeth. No show July 4; extra show 2 pm Saturday, July 11. RUSSELL HAUSFELD. Artist’s Repertory Theatre, 1515 SW Morrison St., 503-241-1278. 7:30 pm Wednesday-Saturday; 2 and 7:30 pm Sunday, through June 12. $25.

ALSO PLAYING Almost, Maine

The most private moments in love are also the most fun to spy on. Audiences get to indulge their voyeuristic sides at Lyon Theatre’s Almost, Maine, where eight moments from relationships at totally different stages come front and center. You can see the slow downturn of Ginette’s mouth when she tells Pete she loves him and he’s silent. It’s intimate, with only three rows of seating inside the tiny Shaking the Tree Theater

and two actors on stage at any time. The tiny but impressive cast includes Portlandia veterans Katie O’Grady Field and Jaime Langton, who enthusiastically take the female roles, and John Zoller, who quadruple-turns as a bewildered boyfriend, a jaded husband, a man in love with his best male friend and a lost soul who reconnects with an old flame at a bachelorette party. The other male roles are played by tall and lanky Jason Satterlund, making his theater debut here after 25 year directing in the film industry. And it’s an impressive debut, where he assumes multiple roles with an ease that proves he’s been paying attention to the art of acting from behind the camera. Whether voyeurism makes a good date night is your prerogative. RUSSEL HAUSFELD. Shaking the Tree Warehouse, 823 SE Grant St., 503-2350635. 7:30 pm Thursday-Saturday. May 19-28. $17 online, $20 at the door.

CONT. on page 34

Willamette Week MAY 25, 2016


PERFORMANCE The fight scene in Post 5’s Desdemona, a play about a handkerchief (choreographed by Kristen Mun) follows a drunken, topless chill-sesh and ends in an offstage scream with a white cloth stained red. Why should Shakespeare’s dudes get all the violent outbursts? Playwright Paula Vogel imagined what Othello’s ladies were doing in their castle chambers. Just like the men, they are into betrayal and murder. Desdemona’s (Elizabeth Parker) weapon of choice is a wine bottle: she swings wide but pours generously to curb her privileged boredom. Emilia (Lucy Paschall) brandishes a crucifix, aiming to strike the sin she sees in women’s free sexuality with the fervor of a wife regularly raped by her husband. Bianca (Shannon Mastel), Cyprus’s top sex worker, is the only one ready for a real fight, pulling a curved dagger from her leather boot plus a hoof pick (once used to mockingly measure certain pricks.) No one wins in this fight, or in this play, which proposes that friendship between women is impossible and proves its point as frustrated ambition, jealous mistrust and status-climbing destroy any relationship that could have offered Desdemona an escape from her fated death bed. JESS DRAKE. Post5 Theater, 1666 SE Lambert St. 971-333-1758. 7:30 pm FridaySunday, through May 28. $20.

Grand Concourse

Before opening night, Artists Repertory Theater had already extended the run of this show about a nun, a homeless man, an immigrant and a weirdo in a soup kitchen. Before you go listen to an orgasmic blowjob while sitting in complete darkness with strangers, know that this is not Artists Rep’s best. But that’s only because the theater’s been killing it lately, setting the bar heavenly high. Concourse is meant to center on Shelley, a lifelong nun having a crisis of faith, and the rebellious Emma, a volunteer with rainbow-colored hair. At Artists Rep, this female-helmed play gets stolen by the men. Both Portland actresses do hit their mark. Ayanna Berkshire plays the plain clothes nun with a no-nonsense attitude and daddy issues like a cool aunt figure, and while newcomer Jahnavi Alyssa seems like an uncomfortable understudy when she swallows words and moves robotically, it works here because her character is exactly that unsure. But Allen Nause and Jon San Nicolas are the standouts. The two Artist Rep mainstays fast-pitch their roles into fully-formed characters and San Nicolas steals nearly every scene as the smooth-operating Oscar, a Joey Tribbiani type. ENID SPITZ. Artists Repertory Theater, 7:30 pm TuesdaySaturday; 2 and 7:30 pm Sunday, May 6-June 5. $48. Artists Rep, 1515 SW Morrison St Portland OR 97205. Sunday. Free.

James and the Giant Peach

Oregon Children’s Theater stages a song-and-dance adventure with massive produce and plastic bug props that are larger than some of the cast members. Lucky for James and his bug friends, when a mutant peach falls from it’s tree, the fruit sweeps them away on a magical adventure instead of crushing them. OCT is a sweet portal into the theater world for little actors and audiences. Only 2 pm shows on May 28 and 29. Newmark Theatre, 1111 SW Broadway, 503-8288285. 2 and 5 pm Saturday; 11 am and 2 pm Sunday, May 7-29. $14-$32.

Peter and the Starcatcher

Like a Disney movie exploded inside a tiny theater, Peter and the Starcatcher packs a zillion plot twists, puns, Three Stooges-like gags, and staging tricks into the Portland Playhouse for this prequel to J.M. Barrie’s classic Peter Pan. When Peter (Nick Ferrucci) meets Wendy’s mother (Jennifer Rowe), the duo battles pubescent awkwardness and the bumbling pirate Black Stache (Isaac Lamb with an epic


Willamette Week MAY 25, 2016


Desdemona, a Play About a Handkerchief

HAWTHORNE ‘stache). Ferrucci nails the 13-year-old orphan’s role, as does Darius Pierce as the sniveling Smee and Lamb as the gargantuan buffoon Black Stache. The dozen cast members fly around stage nonstop for nearly three hours— sometimes literally—giving each other piggyback rides, doing the cancan dressed as mermaids, and miming chase scenes through the jungle in what looks like alive-action Mario Kart race. The labyrinthine set, live musicians and theatrics make Starcatcher the biggest spectacle—if not the most nuanced production—on any Portland stage right now. Starcatcher’s one fault is its length. But you’re likely to be breathless through most of it, the sight of Lamb doing high kicks as a burly mermaid etched into your retinas. ENID SPITZ. Portland Playhouse, 602 NE Prescott St., 503-4885822. 7:30 pm Wednesday-Saturday, 2 pm Sundays. April 30-May 29. $20-$36.


Improv is, by definition, an unwieldy dramatic form that veers in all direction. Symbolism is like that. Swastikas! Evil Eyes! Dung beetles! Improvisers tell stories themed around “the signs” and making meaning out of “the chaos of the world” in this new longform show from Brody Theater’s Domeka Parker. Shaking the Tree Theater, 823 SE Grant St., 10 pm Friday-Saturday, May 20-28. $5.

The Udmurts

The coffee line at intermission was buzzing after a startling bit of bloody Udmurtian horse magic just before the break (Udmurtia is a region of Russia, if you were wondering). Then, a perky Southern lady says: “I’ve just never seen nothing like that before. Two boys kissing! But that’s just real life, even if it ain’t mine. That’s why I love Defunkt.” It’s hard to resist enjoying the lazy seduction of a shining, virginal gay boy by a smooth-talking, trust-fund dude and his fierce, thieving girlfriend. They pass a joint around the pullout couch bed with rainbow afghan in the apartment filled with eclectic treasures, or junk, depending on your eye. Then the seduction turns sinister, to edgeplay with sexual violence and straight-up scams. Apartment owner Mrs. Huff (Jane Geesman), a former actress and last of the Udmurts—pagan redheads whose land was stolen by the USSR for chemical warfare factories—takes in a renter, Nate (Samson Syharath), who has fled his abusive Florida megachurch family. This play elegantly shifts between vulnerability, violence, arousal and betrayal, raising the question ”Who can be trusted?” JESS DRAKE. Defunkt Theatre, 4319 SE Hawthorne Blvd., 503-974-4938. 7:30 pm Thursday-Sunday, May 13-June 18. Pay what you will Thursdays and Sundays, $15-$25 Fridays and Saturdays.

COMEDY & VARIETY Curious Comedy Open Mic

Sign up start at 7:15, and every comic gets a tight three minutes onstage in this weekly show hosted by Andie Main. Curious Comedy Theater, 5225 NE Martin Luther King Jr. Blvd., 4779477. 8 pm Sundays. Free. Curious Comedy, 5225 NE Martin Luther King Jr. Blvd., 477-9477. Sunday. Free.

Earthquake Hurricane

Some of WW’s favorite funny Portlanders showcase famous and not-so-famous, local and not-solocal comedians. Hosted by Curtis Cook, Alex Falcone, Anthony Lopez and Bri Pruett inside a pretty epic bike shop. Velo Cult Bike Shop, 1969 NE 42nd Ave., 922-2012. 9 pm every Wednesday. Free, $5 suggested donation. 21+. Velo Cult, 1969 NE 42nd Ave., 922-2012. Wednesday. Free.

Jay Chandrasekhar

Jay Chandrasekhar is a founding member of the Broken Lizard comedy troupe (emphasis on bro) that has brought the world such classic films as Club Dread and Beerfest. Known for starring as Arcot Ramathorn, one half of car Ramrod, in Broken Lizard’s best-known film, Super Troopers, Chandrasekhar’s three-night pass through Portland should give him plenty of time to talk up the partially crowdfunded. MIKE ACKER. Super Troopers 2. Helium Comedy Club, 1510 SE 9th Ave., 888-643-8669. 8 pm Thursday, 7:30 and 10 pm FridaySaturday, May 26-28. $17-$23. 21+

Mo Mandel

With appearances on Conan, Chelsea Lately, and The Late Late Show with Craig Ferguson under his belt, Mo Mandel is a comic on the rise. Host of truTV’s Barmageddon and star of NBC’s Free Agents, Mandel barely has time to tell jokes, which is what he’ll be doing during a four-night, seven-show run at Portland’s original comedy club. MIKE ACKER. Harvey’s Comedy Club, 436 NW 6th Ave., 503-241-0338, 7:30 pm Thursday, 7:30 and 10 pm Friday, 5, 7:30 and 10 pm Saturday, 7:30 pm Sunday, May 26-29. $15. 21+.

Open Court

This weekly, long-form improv show combines performers from many Portland theaters and troupes. Newbies are welcome and teams are picked at random, then coached by an improv veteran before taking the stage. Curious Comedy Theater, 5225 NE Martin Luther King Jr. Blvd., 4779477. 7:30 pm Thursdays. $5. Curious Comedy, 5225 NE Martin Luther King Jr. Blvd., 477-9477. Thursday. Free.

For more Performance listings, visit

Willamette Week MAY 25, 2016


VISUAL ARTS = WW Pick. Highly recommended.


By JENNIFER RABIN. TO BE CONSIDERED FOR LISTINGS, submit show information—including opening and closing dates, gallery address and phone number—at least two weeks in advance to: Visual Arts, WW, 2220 NW Quimby St., Portland, OR 97210. Email:

River Road: Milepost 13, part of The Fallen Fawn

Coalesce; Above and Beneath

If you only saw the world from an airplane window at 10,000 feet, it would look a lot like Ann Lindsay’s abstract paintings. Using limestone clay on panel, Lindsay captures the tight grids, the swirling circles, and the meanderingly wild landscapes that can only be appreciated from above. In contrast, sculptor Joseph Conrad’s rough and pitted stone carvings make us feel as though are feet are firmly planted on the ground. Taken together, their work in the two-artist show Coalesce; Above and Beneath gives us the land at opposites. Waterstone Gallery, 124 NW 9th Ave., 226-6196. Through May 29.

The Fallen Fawn

If you walk into Charles A. Hartman Fine Art this month, don’t be surprised if it takes you a couple tries to leave. Holly Andres’ narrative series of color photographs, about two sisters who find a mysterious suitcase that they hide from their parents, will keep you lost in an imaginary world of the artist’s creation. Each image feels like a still from a film, capturing a moment that suggests more than it reveals— like a pink stiletto drowning in a lake, two lipstick-ringed cigarette butts stamped out in an ashtray, or an old car abandoned along a forest trail. Andres uses mid-20thcentury costumes and production design to stage a series that feels deeply reminiscent of the secrets and magic of childhood. Charles A. Hartman Fine Art, 134 NW 8th Ave., 503-287-3886. Through May 28.

Hidden Narratives

Portland Nonprofits! It’s almost time to apply for the 2016 Give!Guide and nominate someone for the Skidmore Prize.


Willamette Week MAY 25, 2016

Four glass artists present work that combines printmaking techniques with kiln-glass, further pushing the boundaries of both processes. Michelle Murillo explores her ancestry and identity in a standout installation comprised of rows and rows of ghostlike pieces of identification—travel documents, driver’s licenses—that are missing the faces of the people to whom they belong. Each was made by screenprinting glass powder and then kiln-firing it, resulting in objects so fragile, they look like they might dissolve if you touched them. Bullseye Projects, 300 NW 13th Ave., 503-227-0222. Through June 18.

The Museum’s Ghosts

Photographer Andrés Wertheim uses consecutive in-camera exposures to merge images of museum visitors with the artworks they have come to see. The resulting photographs range from hilarious— like the image of a bored visitor sitting in the hallway inches away, it appears, from two peasants fighting to the death—to tender, as when Wertheim juxtaposes a teenage boy lying on a museum

bench unknowingly mid-cuddle with a cherub who is sleeping in his lap. Sometimes it is hard to determine which parts of the final composition belong to which exposure, blending art and life in a way that makes us question if there is any separation between the two. Blue Sky Gallery, 122 NW 8th Ave., 503225-0210. Through May 29.

Nothing Lasts Forever

Toronto artist Brian Donnelly paints photorealist portraits of disembodied heads against optimistic backgrounds of cloudless baby blue skies. Once completed, he applies corrosive materials, like turpentine or hand sanitizer, to his subjects’ faces so that their features melt down the canvas in dripping trails of color. He could easily paint them this way from the start, but in the act of destroying something perfect, his work talks to us about loss, letting go, mortality and the inevitability of time. Stephanie Chefas Projects, 305 SE 3rd Ave., Suite 202, 310-990-0702. Through June 4.


White Box is devoting its three galleries to three different video shows from artists Peter Campus, Julia Oldham and Suzanne Opton. Oldham uses four projections screens to create an immersive environment in which she takes us through a black hole and back out again. Peter Campus’ work is meditative in contrast: Two videos of boats tethered to docks depict such little movement that one of them appears, at first, to be a still photograph. But stand in front of it awhile and you will see the subtle movement of the water and the shifting of rope lines, reminding us that video can be quietly observational. Opton films factory workers in India performing the rote “empty gestures” of their jobs—knob turning, lever pulling— in a captivating video about how well our bodies remember. White Box, 24 NW 1st Ave., 503-412-3689. Through June 4.


You might have the urge to pull down Emily Bixler’s sculptures off the wall. Using substantial and utilitarian materials like sailing rope, and creating forms from wood and horsehair bristles that evoke hand tools, Bixler’s sculptures scream to be held and put to use. But the wood that might otherwise serve as a handle boasts a raw wood edge and a luminous finish. And the rope that could be used to hitch or heave or pull has been wrapped with cotton thread, obscuring its original purpose while retaining the braided undulations of its form, now purely decorative. Don’t be fooled into thinking that you have to go to a gallery to see well-curated art; this month, the

best sculpture show in town is at a coffee shop. Stumptown Coffee Roasters, 4525 SE Division St., 503230-7702. Through June 8.

Surrounded by Feeling

Artist Ellen Goldschmidt’s series of graphite portraits on paper are like haiku. They are full but not busy, simple but always alluding to something greater and further beyond. Surrounded by Feeling is largely about Goldschmidt’s relationship with her older sister. The work conveys so much to the viewer— isolation, longing, otherness, playful antagonism—not by what she includes in her drawings, but by what she leaves out. It is the elliptical nature of her work that makes it so powerful because the viewer is left to fill in everything we can’t see. Goldschmidt says that the portraits “are created by inhabiting, rather than depicting, emotion,” and as such, she gives us a visceral window into the pains and rivalries of siblinghood. Blackfish Gallery, 420 NW 9th Ave., 503-224-2634. Through May 28.

Prison Obscura

Curator Pete Brook has put together a remarkable exhibition at Newspace Center for Photography that gives us a rare peek into the prison-industrial complex. Using everything from surveillance photography to pinhole cameras given to prisoners to take photos in their cells, eight different photographers offer vastly different perspectives on a marginalized population. Mark Strandquist’s ongoing series Some of Places We’ve Missed is a standout. He asks inmates, “If you had a window in your cell, what place from your past would it look out to?” The places are then photographed according to the inmates’ directions, and the photos are mailed back to them—an outside proxy for those on the inside. Newspace Center for Photography, 1632 SE 10th Ave., 503-963-1935. Through May 28.

Stupid Man

Ty Ennis’ series of grayscale paintings are rough and loose. Images of a heron, a cowboy in shadow and a man skinning a deer are rendered with few assertive brush strokes, conveying worlds with little gesture. With Stupid Man, Ennis set out to make a body of work that would return him to an earlier time—when he first started painting—with fewer materials, expectations and obligations. The simplicity, joy and freedom of that time are evident in the work, folded in with autobiographical references to his life as a new father (think Looney Tunes characters). He successfully uses the visual language and techniques of youth to question the expectations and obligations of adulthood. Nationale, 3360 SE Division St., 477-9786. Through June 18.

Twin Feather Meditations

When an artist presents a series that is in stark contrast to the type of work he has produced before, it is important to pay attention and be curious about what has caused his practice to mature. Since coming out after a life of being closeted, Emilio Lobato’s sharp rectilinear and geometric compositions have given way to the soft, layered monotype prints in Twin Feather Meditations. The incorporation of organic forms and the act of freer mark-making represent a more intuitive way of working for the artist. The feather imagery throughout the series serves as a personal totem for Lobato as he explores a belief in certain Native cosmologies that transgender and homosexual members of a community—so called “two-spirit” people—are highly spiritual beings. Elizabeth Leach Gallery, 417 NW 9th Ave., 224-0521. Through May 28.

For more Visual Arts listings, visit

BOOKS = WW Pick. Highly recommended. By JAMES HELMSWORTH. TO BE CONSIDERED FOR LISTINGS, submit lecture or reading information at least two weeks in advance to: WORDS, WW, 2220 NW Quimby St., Portland, OR 97210. Email: Fax: 243-1115.


In 1992, in a testament to its utter backwardness (I get to say that ’cause I’m from here), Oregon finally elected an African-American to a statewide office when Jim Hill, who had previously served in the state House and Senate, became treasurer. But in his new book, The New “N” Word, Hill argues that the next great fight for social justice needs to happen with white people. He argues that elites are preventing the white middle class from accessing good jobs, merely exploiting them for cheap labor as they did with African-Americans. Annie Bloom’s Books, 7834 SW Capitol Highway, 503-246-0053. 7 pm. Free.

Jo Baker

A young Samuel Beckett gets out of Mom’s place in Ireland and, as any young aesthete would, moves to Paris to vibe out and make art. Shortly thereafter, the Nazis invade. Bummer. But, rather than let it get him down, ol’ Sammy B. joins the French Resistance and experiences a bunch of events that lead him to writing hits like Waiting for Godot and that one that’s just the mouth talking. At least, that’s what Jo Baker imagines to have happened in her “biographical fiction,” A Country Road, a Tree. Powell’s Books at Cedar Hills Crossing, 3415 SW Cedar Hills Blvd., Beaverton, 800-8787323. 7 pm. Free.

The Power Paradox: How We Gain and Lose Influence

Power makes you evil, whether it’s the power that comes with a small loan of $1 million or that which comes with being married to the man with the nuke codes. According to UC Berkeley psychologist Dacher Keltner, those examples aren’t real power. Real power, he argues, comes from other people and is definitely a good thing. It should definitely give you some good tactics the next time the co-op’s at a quorum and quinoa is up for debate. Powell’s City of Books, 1005 W Burnside St., 800878-7323. 7:30 pm. Free.

THURSDAY, MAY 26 Pit Bull: The Battle Over an American Icon

With hits like “Timber” and “Give Me Everything,” rapper Pitbull, born Armando Christian Pérez, is undoubtedly an American icon, though certainly a polarizing one. Wait, this is about the dogs. Uh, author Bronwen Dickey, whose work has also appeared in The Best American Travel Writing, Slate, and The New York Times, explores our relationship with a dog. ¡Dalé! Powell’s Books at Cedar Hills Crossing, 3415 SW Cedar Hills Blvd., Beaverton, 800-878-7323. 7 pm. Free.

Mark Kurlansky

With previous volumes Salt and Cod, Mark Kurlansky explored how specific commodities shaped human history. In his latest effort, he ventures into the world of bisyllabic nouns with Paper: Paging Through History. It’s been a driving force in the spread of religion, media and art. And it’s here to stay: According to Kurlansky, that whole “paperless office” thing is never going to happen. Powell’s City of Books, 1005 W Burnside St., 800-878-7323. 7:30 pm. Free.

SATURDAY, MAY 28 Unruly Equality

Far from being merely the word that your local hardcore frontman yells before “opening this pit up,” anarchy has a rich history in the United States, stretching from advocation by poor immigrants at the beginning of the 20th century to its resurgence as a tool for ecological preservation. In Unruly Equality, Andy Cornell of Oregon Higher Education Organizing Project explores this history in detail. Mother Foucault’s, 523 SE Morrison St., 503-236-2665. 6 pm. Free.

Joe Hill

While working as a school nurse, Harper Grayson witnesses a man spontaneously combust. It soon becomes clear that the man’s condition is part of a worldwide epidemic, which forces Harper into triage work at a hospital and exposes both the best and worst sides of humanity. It’s The Fireman, the fourth book from Hill, whose Horns was turned into a weird movie with Daniel Radcliffe, and whose dad’s name rhymes with Schmeven Schming. Powell’s City of Books, 1005 W Burnside St., 800-878-7323. 2 pm. Free.

For more Books listings, visit


Chris McCormick, DESERT BOYS If Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas were narrated by a gay Holden Caulfield, it might read a little like Desert Boys ( P i c a d o r, 2 4 0 p a g e , $25). Love and loathing in Wr i tt e n a s a c o l Los Angeles County. lection of journal-like fragments, Chris M c C o r m i c k ’s d e b u t novel is a bildungsroman centered on Daley Kushner, an acnescarred reporter who flees his desolate Los Angeles exurb and Armenian helicopter mom to find solace and sex in San Francisco. The book careens wildly between straightforward stories like “The Immigrants”—in which Kushner returns home and eats feta-sprinkled watermelon by the pool—and writerly chapters with emoticons, Q&As or excerpts from emails. One section, “The Stars Are Faggots, and Other Reasons to Leave,” is made up of 30 numbered arguments for getting the fuck out of the Antelope Valley, the Mojave Desert region where both Kushner and McCormick grew up—including the fact that “my mother served me breakfast in bed every Sunday until I was fourteen.” McCormick’s strongest asset is his ability to illuminate social issues with well-chosen detail. In some cases, it’s the homophobia of his best friend, who shoots Kushner in the face with an airsoft gun for getting too close, or the complicated politics of immigration. His mother, an immigrant herself, made cheesy börek pastries for a dinner party because “those Mexicans love anything with a lot of cheese, I think.” This is not the glitzy Los Angeles County of The Hills. Kushner’s high-school mascot was a black kid in a Confederate soldier costume, Ford trucks with chrome testicles swarm the mall, and his mother’s idea of an outing is “to go to Starbucks, the one by the Target, and then take our coffees to Payless ShoeSource, where she wanted to buy me a pair of flip-flops.” While a story about two truck salesmen seducing underage girls might make you feel like vomiting a little in your mouth, McCormick’s conversational tone carries you along. If there’s a through line tying every story together, it’s the desert itself. The novel is as much a portrait of the Antelope Valley as the young men living in it. California’s desertscape takes on a near-biblical quality—a place of tumbleweed, prodigal sons and homophobia, where lizards race underfoot. ENID SPITZ. GO: Chris McCormick is at Powell’s Books on Hawthorne, 3723 SE Hawthorne Blvd., on Thursday, May 26. 7:30 pm. Free.

Willamette Week MAY 25, 2016



MOVIES = WW Pick. Highly recommended. Editor: ENID SPITZ. TO BE CONSIDERED FOR LISTINGS, send screening information at least two weeks in advance to Screen, WW, 2220 NW Quimby St., Portland, OR 97210. Email: Fax: 243-1115.

OPENING THIS WEEK Alice Through the Looking Glass

D Lewis Carroll’s Through the LookingGlass is a classic, the birthplace of some of our favorite characters in Disney’s animated Alice, like the Walrus and the Carpenter, and some who didn’t make the cut, like the Jabberwock. Unfortunately for Alice Through the Looking Glass, the Jabberwock died in the first film of this live-action series. What you’re left with is a tale of time travel and daddy issues in which the only connection to the source material is that Alice walks through a mirror. Johnny Depp’s quirky Mad Hatter is sad. He found a hat, you see. A hat he made for his dad. And so it’s up to Alice (Mia Wasikowska), who exists solely to solve all of Wonderland’s problems, to travel back in time and find out what happened to Hatter’s dad. Director James Bobin has turned down the quirk from Tim Burton’s atrocious predecessor— viewers are mercifully spared another Johnny Depp dance number—but the basic problems remain. Alice is a bland action hero. Helena Bonham Carter’s Red Queen is ear-piercingly obnoxious. Depp’s Mad Hatter just plain sucks. Time (Sacha Baron Cohen, with a thick German accent) provides an occasional laugh here and there, but they’re surrounded by a mess of lame attempts at wit, faux profundity and unearned emotional resolutions. It’s bad, and everyone involved should feel bad. PG. JOHN LOCANTHI. Bridgeport, Cedar Hills, City Center, Clackamas, Division, Living Room Theaters, Tigard, Vancouver.

The Lobster

C The Lobster is one of those dystopian sci-fi movies that needs to spend the first 30 minutes laying down the ground rules of the setting. David (Colin Farrell) is single, which is outlawed, so he goes to a singles retreat. But there is one catch: If you don’t find a mate within 60 days, you will be turned into an animal. On the plus side, you get to pick your animal. David chooses the lobster. Interesting concept, but this vision of the future mostly involves Farrell, John C. Reilly, Rachel Weisz and the rest of cast lurching through their lines in a dull, passionless monotone. When this GrecoIrish feature screened at the Portland International Film Festival in February, it had more star power than almost anything on the roster. Now, it’s Colin Farrell as a lobster. R. JOHN LOCANTHI. Bridgeport, Cinema 21.

Love & Friendship

Kate Beckinsale, Chloe Savigny and Stephen Fry show the wise-cracking side of Austen in writer-director Whit Stillman’s tongue-in-cheek romcom. Based on Austen’s untitled and little-known novella “Lady Susan,” the plot follows bad girl Susan Vernon (Beckinsale) as she searches for her next husband. It’s the most critically praised Austen since Knightley’s Elizabeth, but with Beckinsale’s edge and Stillman’s campy little additions, like title cards introducing the characters, dare we say this looks better? Screened after deadline. See for a review. R. Clackamas.

Ran, A.K.

A/C Legendary Japanese director Akira

Kurosawa’s 1985 masterpiece, Ran, is a violent and visually stunning play on King Lear, in which the aging Lord Hidetora Ichimonji (Tatsuya Nakadai) relinquishes power to his two eldest sons but is quickly betrayed. It’s classic for a reason. A.K., on the other hand, is renowned French filmmaker Chris Marker’s documentary following the production of Ran and Kurosawa’s cinematic techniques. While you won’t want to miss seeing the intensity of


Ran’s war scenes in this 4K restoration on the big screen, A.K. is something to stick around for only if you’re a big fan of slow-paced DVD extras and behindthe-scenes footage. R. CURTIS COOK. NW Film Center’s Whitsell Auditorium. 7 pm Friday-Saturday, 3:30 pm Sunday, May 27-29.

Sunset Song

B Lewis Grassic Gibbon’s 1932 novel presents an unobscured portrait of a young Scottish woman’s journey through education, labor, marriage, sex and childbirth. In this 2015 retelling, Agyness Deyn plays the demands of Chris Guthrie’s coming-of-age arc with touching curiosity and pain. Director Terence Davies sets up a few moments of Sydney Pollack-style countryside cinematography, including one beautiful shot of sheep trotting on cobblestone (it’s that kind of movie). If you’re a devotee of deep-cut BBC literary adaptations, then, aye, proceed. Otherwise, it’s a quiet slog through the tight-lipped tragedies of World War I, bucolic isolation and familial abuse. R. CHANCE SOLEM-PFEIFER. Fox Tower.


B Jesus (Héctor Medina), a gay hairdresser with dreams of breaking into Cuba’s underground drag scene, confronts his machismo father, Angel (Jorge Perugorría), when the absentee dad gets released from prison, shows up and punches Jesus in the face. In this Irishmade, Spanish-language Oscar nominee, the two are forced to confront their differences as Jesus struggles to strike a balance between connecting with his ailing father and staying true to himself. Viva takes a cautious approach to subjects such as poverty, prostitution and homophobia. But when there are emotional moments, they are punctuated by dramatic drag performances. After a particularly intense breakthrough, a sobbing Jesus takes to the stage, lipsyncing his heart out as mascara streams down his face. R. CURTIS COOK. Fox Tower.

STILL SHOWING 10 Cloverfield Lane

C+ The motto of J.J. Abrams’ latest thriller is, basically, don’t text and drive. Also, don’t break up with your fiance, or else you’ll get in a terrible car accident, be abducted by a Lolita-inspired murderer and watch your whole family die in the alien apocalypse—in one night. 10 Cloverfield Lane falls victim to the usual thriller clichés: It doesn’t come close to passing the Bechdel test and contains numerous gratuitous shots of Michelle (Mary Elizabeth Winstead) in her underwear, a cheap thriller soundtrack and, of course, aliens. Despite the clichés, Abrams shows for the first hour and 20 minutes that he’s almost capable of a smart psychological thriller. PG-13. SOPHIA JUNE. Academy, Avalon, Fox Tower, Joy, Jubitz, Laurelhurst, Valley, Vancouver.

The Angry Birds Movie

Perhaps the greatest Finnish-American collaboration this decade is this movie based on a game based on anger management therapy and avian flu. When green pigs take over Red’s island paradise, the vitriolic bird and his buddies take matters into their own hands. Birds don’t have hands, but these do have eyebrows to rival Scorsese’s. PG. Bridgeport, Cedar Hills, City Center, Clackamas, Division, Eastport, Lloyd, Milwaukie, Oak Grove, Pioneer Place, Tigard, Vancouver.

Barbershop: The Next Cut

D It’s been 14 years since we first entered Calvin’s Barbershop in South

Willamette Week MAY 25, 2016

BETTER THAN DAYS OF FUTURE PAST: Alexandra Shipp and Oscar Isaac.



A beautiful example comes in the film when Beast, Mystique and Nightcrawler—blue-skinned all— gather in solidarity without stating the obvious. The whole world finds a use for mutants in Apocalypse BY N ATHA N CA R SON 503-243-2122 since the stakes are nuclear-level and worldwide. Disney just hit another home run with Captain If there’s a weakness in this film, it’s the nemesis. America: Civil War. Fox has struggled to compete, but Isaac is not to blame, though he was far more likable its latest in the X-franchise proves that the Marvel as Poe Dameron and far less so as Llewyn Davis. The Cinematic Universe is not the only home for A-grade issue is that, despite being a demigod, thousands of superhero fare. The fact that Civil War and Apocalypse years old, absorbing the powers of countless “infecame out the same month should not be grounds for rior” mutants over time, and leaving the entire world any arguments. It’s a very simple win-win for fans of in shambles by the end of the film, he simply never spectacular entertainment. seems all that effective or scary. It’s not that these When Bryan Singer jumped ship and left the third film adaptations should slavishly follow the comic’s X-Men flick in the incapable hands of Brett Ratner, storylines, but one thing that always set X-Men apart it nearly killed the franchise. Singer reintegrated from other heroes was just how imperiled they always himself as a writer of the excellent prequel First seemed to be. With a villain as deadly as Apocalypse, Class and director of the uneven Days of Future Past. the one point that stopped me from adding a plus to With Apocalypse, he has finally steered the the movie’s A grade was the constant sense ship back on course, crafting one of the that the good guys would inevitably win. greatest comics pictures to date. The There is great temptation to time streams may be muddy, but compare Apocalypse to Civil War. THE Singer draws liberally from X-Men The major difference (aside from EGYPTIANS comics writer Chris Claremont’s being set in separate Marvel toy box with great results. universes) is that gritty Captain WILL BE TOO The film opens in ancient America is dour in its seriousness. PALE Egypt, introducing the titular X-Men may deal with worldwide villain as the first mutant. Oscar peril, but it feels more like a comic. FOR SOME. Isaac portrays the blue-skinned Three-D is recommended since Apocalypse then, aping Marlon the film is so powerfully front-loaded Brando in Apocalypse Now. Jennifer with Tron-like tunnels and cameras flyLawrence and Michael Fassbender return as ing through debris. There is gratuitous CGI, but Mystique and Magneto, respectively, and Hugh honestly, no one misses the days when Superman Jackman makes a brief but satisfying cameo as the crossed the screen hanging from a wire. pre-Wolverine Mutant X. Factions on the internet will inevitably find First Class was set in the swinging ’60s, and Days reasons to hate this movie. The Egyptians will be of Future Past fumbled its alternate future but nailed too pale for some. The budding romance between the ’70s. Apocalypse reverently sends up the ’80s. Scott Summers and Jean Grey will fall flat for others. Quicksilver sports a Rush Moving Pictures shirt, Angel Psylocke’s comics-accurate body suit will madden lurks in the rafters of a gothic Berlin warehouse while someone’s mother. The question is: Do you want blasting Metallica’s “Four Horsemen,” and Storm to have fun and enjoy a comic book turned into (Alexandra Shipp) wears her iconic mohawk. a quarter-billion-dollar feature film or would you Super-powered mutants have always been a rather stay home reading Proust? stand-in for outsiders, giving nerds and pariahs who A SEE IT: X:Men Apocalypse is rated PG-13. It opens are drawn to the comic a sense of solace and hope. Thursday at most Portland-area theaters.

Side Chicago, and along with shiny, bald additions like Common, J.B. Smoove and Nicki Minaj’s bosom, there’s a new “No Guns Allowed” sign on the wall. The writing is too childlike to make an impact or come close to the subtle wit that brought up themes of masculinity, black America and class conflict in the original Barbershop. PG-13. LAUREN TERRY. Clackamas.

Batman v Superman: Dawn of Justice

D Batman and Superman are fighting, and it’s hard to choose a side. The new Warner Bros. Superman is classically boring, overpowered and out of place in the 21st century. Batman, on the other hand, has been reinvented as a huge dickhead. Played by Ben Affleck with a characteristic lack of gravitas, Batman walks around in a silly metal suit killing people. You know how Batman never kills people? He does now. Even when he doesn’t have to. He even assigns himself the task of killing Superman because, you know, “he might be bad later.” With nobody to root for, BvS:DoJ is just an unconscionably long slugfest simultaneously attempting too much and accomplishing almost nothing. Despite the rare bright spots— like Jesse Eisenberg’s intriguingly outlandish Lex Luthor and Amy Adams as a strong international war reporter version of Lois Lane—I left feeling bored and slightly concussed from giant men punching each other into buildings for no reason. PG-13. ALEX FALCONE. Academy, Avalon, Beaverton, Division.

A Bigger Splash

The Boss

B- This time, McCarthy stars as Michelle Darnell, a self-made tycoon whose confidence is rivaled only by the height of her turtlenecks. R. Bridgeport, Clackamas, Vancouver.

Captain America: Civil War


B Within the first 10 minutes. the titular “merc with the mouth” slaughters a baker’s dozen of goons to a soundtrack of “Shoop,” breaks the fourth wall by talking to the audience, punches multiple scrotums, drops more f-bombs than Tony Montana and takes a bullet directly up the butthole while giggling about it. Deadpool doesn’t reinvent the wheel. But it does teabag it. And sometimes that’s enough. R. AP KRYZA. Academy, Avalon, Fox Tower, Joy, Jubitz, Kennedy School, Laurelhurst, Valley, Vancouver.

D Undistinguishable from its counterparts, Part 1 ’s excessively dull proceedings are punctuated by generic action scenes in which the Bureau of Genetic Welfare uses a bunch of weirdo army shit to kidnap little kids and wipe their brains clean. PG-13. MIKE GALLUCCI. Valley, Vancouver.

doesn’t have a plot. But you’ll hardly realize it and you probably won’t care. The filmmaker who stunned the world with Boyhood’ brings his “fuck it” attitude to a film about a college baseball team in 1980s Texas. R. SOPHIA JUNE. Fox Tower.


Eye in the Sky

D To be remotely successful, Criminal needs to realize the absurdity of its premise. A CIA agent’s memories are injected into the frontal lobe of a nothing-to-lose convict (Kevin Costner). Complete with the prisoner going rogue from government grasp, it’s a plot worthy of ’80s Stallone or Schwarzenegger face-lifted by an overqualified cast (Gary Oldman, Tommy Lee Jones, Gal Gadot) and updated with a few cybercrimes. R. CHANCE SOLEM-PFEIFER. Vancouver.

Murmurs P.6

The Divergent Series: Allegiant, Part 1

A- Captain America: Civil War, though, is proof you can jam pretty much every superhero in your roster into one film and still let individuals shine. In pitting team Iron Man (Robert Downey Jr.) against Team Cap (Chris Evans) over a suspiciously fascist registration law for “enhanced humans,” directors Joe and Anthony Russo could have just put the heroes in a big-ass sandbox and let them duke it out. They do that, and it’s spectacular. But there’s nothing redundant in the action here, from a Bourne-esque opening chase to closecombat thrills reminiscent of The Raid to a surprisingly subdued and heartfelt finale. The Russos have heard your complaints about universe-building at the expense of story. Civil War is fun. It’s smart. It’s coherent. And, most importantly, it allows its heart to beat strongly amid the chaos. Your move, DC. PG-13. AP KRYZA. Bagdad, Bridgeport, Cedar Hills, City Center, Clackamas, Division, Eastport, Lloyd, Milwaukie, Moreland, Oak Grove, Pioneer Place, Roseway, St. Johns 1 & 2, Tigard, Vancouver.


B+ Luxuriate in the sexiness of director Luca Guadagnino’s hypersensual images of island love, before diving into the waves of its characters’ lives, fraught with regret and lies. A rock star (Tilda Swinton) and her boyfriend vacation on the island of Pantelleria, sunbathing and having sex in silence. Unexpectedly crashing the party is Ralph Fiennes as a wild, hard-living music producer intent on winning back the rock star he palmed off years ago on her current lover. While Guadagnino’s I Am Love (2009) established him as an auteur of visual decadence and Swinton his Pygmalion-like muse, in Splash, Fiennes is the life of the film. He delivers a performance of such energy that it threatens to overtake Guadagnino’s meditative beauties. The countrysides filled with swimming pools, dinner parties and nude sunbathing are photographed with an atmospheric attention to detail that lends to

the authenticity of being there. Dakota Johnson is more erotic here than she was in Fifty Shades of Grey, and Swinton embodies the Bowie-like rock star in a believable performance that relies solely on facial expressions and body language. While the film is billed as a suspenseful, erotic thriller, it’s more of a character study that builds to a surprising climax. Then, the film dances around, like Fiennes frolicking to the Rolling Stones’ “Emotional Rescue” in one of the most memorable scenes. R. EZRA JOHNSON-GREENOUGH. Cedar Hills, Clackamas, Fox Tower.

Elvis & Nixon

A- What’s great about this story is

that it focuses on a very short period of time and manages to extrapolate from those few hours a completely different version of these icons than you’re used to seeing. Kevin Spacey plays a Nixon who seems like he’d be fun to hang out with. Meanwhile, Michael Shannon (Boardwalk Empire) plays a brooding, gun-obsessed Elvis between his heyday and Fat Elvis phases. R. ALEX FALCONE. Living Room Theaters.



Everybody Wants Some!!

2735 E BurnsidE st • (503-232-5511) •

A- Richard Linklater’s newest film

C+ The year’s first movie on the ethics of drones and the last film featuring Alan Rickman, misses its mark. British Col. Katherine Powell (Helen Mirren) tracks infamous terrorists to a house in Nairobi, Kenya. The plot arc is more of a plot sine wave, with the withering Lt. Gen. Frank Benson (Rickman as a wandless Professor Snape in olive drab) throwing up his hands and staring down the people who just refuse to blow things up already. R. ZACH MIDDLETON. Bridgeport, Clackamas, Living Room Theaters.


B- Patience helps where fine art is concerned, and Aleksandr Sokurov’s documentary about the Louvre is no different. Feeding history and war through the lens of art, Sokurov gives us a platter of food for thought. After the first 10 minutes, which is a slogging slideshow of low-quality images, we meet the men who saved Paris’ art from German occupation and learn about a period when the Louvre was Le Musée Napoléon to house Napoleon Bonaparte’s spoils of war. NR. RUSSELL HAUSFELD. Cinema 21.


All shows held at the Whitsell Auditorium, 1219 SW Park Avenue Thursday, May 26

Matthew Barney’s River of Fundament

Friday, May 27

Set across the contemporary American landscape, the three-part River of Fundament is an epic story of regeneration and rebirth.

7 pm NW Filmmakers’ Open Screening 7 pm Ran

dir. Akira Kurosawa, Japan, 1985

Saturday, May 28 5 pm A.K.

dir. Chris Marker, France/Japan, 1985

7 pm Ran

Sunday, May 29 3:30 pm Ran 7 pm A.K.

Coming June 3-5

“The only thing you can say with any great certainty is that Barney’s magnum opus is deliberately calculated to divide opinion. It’s a significant work of art. It’s full of shit. But as Norman Mailer consistently and maddeningly proved, it’s quite possible for both of these things to be true at the same time.” —The Guardian, London.

Summer adult filmmaking classes + Film Camps for Kids & Teens — Enroll now!



Gods of Egypt

D It’s ancient Egypt like you’ve never seen it before: bigger, shinier and chock-full of deities punching each other. This is Egypt! PG-13. Vancouver.

Green Room

B+ Patrick Stewart plays the big bad

leader of a backwoods gang of white supremacists. The punk-rock band that falls into his clutches is loosely led by Anton Yelchin (Scotty in the new Star Trek films), and the band is on an unsuccessful tour, taking a detour to


CONT. on page 40

Street P.17 Willamette Week MAY 25, 2016



Matthew Fountain writes richly arranged chamber-pop that is equal parts Nick Cave, Rufus Wainwright, David Byrne, and Harry Nilsson. He and his 9-person band are releasing their debut album, “Born on the Hook”, in May.


Bart Budwig doesn’t write the big songs. He writes the songs about the places between the hills, in the draws and hidden canyons where truth is a little more in focus, stories can take their time gettin’ told, heartbreak is a place of deep reflection, and melodies don’t have to wear rhinestone suits or drive new, shiny, cars to be beautiful.

THE MONKEES ‘GOOD TIMES’ RELEASE PARTY FRIDAY, MAY 27TH AT 7PM Hear the new album, enjoy refreshments, win tickets to a performance at Chinook Winds Casino!


SATURDAY, MAY 28TH AT 2PM Rock ‘n’ roll has rarely been more smart, soulful or satisfying than it has in the hands of The Posies. During an on/off career that’s spanned three decades, the Seattle-rooted outfit, led by musical polymaths Jon Auer and Ken Stringfellow, have shaped and re-shaped their muse, creating one of the more compelling catalogues in modern pop.


Swing and Jazz and Blues combined for a soulful sound with Vocalist Upright Bassist Bill Coones, Daniel Noland guitar, Leonard Maxon drums. Melody is king and improvisation is spontaneous during the performance.

play a paying gig at a neo-Nazi compound. There, the band witnesses a murder that these guys won’t let them walk away from. The characters on both sides are loosely drawn but smart enough not to make stupid decisions, which makes the delay of action last longer than expected. Like Akira Kurosawa, Saulnier finds the anticipation of violence more cinematic than its outcome, which are brief but gratuitous acts that leave a stain. The outcomes are unpredictable, shocking, grisly and really fun. PG-13. EZRA JOHNSON-GREENOUGH. Cinema 21, Hollywood, Oak Grove.

Hail, Caesar!

B+ The Coens’ funniest film since The

Big Lebowski combines a zany caper, a communist plot, ’50s studio politics and a touching story about one man’s calling in life into a cohesive, lighthearted and quip-heavy comedy. It’s a neat package like only the Coen brothers can tie up. PG-13. JOHN LOCANTHI. Laurelhurst.

MAY 27TH through


MAY 30TH 10am to 7pm all days! 1000’S OF USED & NEW VINYL, TONS OF 45S! 1000’S OF USED AND NEW CDS! LOT’S OF OTHER FUN ITEMS!


Willamette Week MAY 25, 2016

The Man Who Knew Infinity

B- The most troubling things about

Keanu are also the best things about it. The movie is named after the adorable escaped pet of a Mexican drug lord, and the poster is of said kitten, but the film’s real draw is clear: Jordan Peele and Keegan-Michael Key, the comedy duo from the gone-too-soon sketch show Key and Peele and the not-gone-soon-enough MADtv. Key (the bald, tall one) plays neurotic family man Clarence, while Peele plays Relle, his desperate, recently dumped cousin. Relle finds Keanu, only to have the cat stolen in a Lebowskian drug mixup. It’s essentially a movie extrapolation of that bit about “White Sounding Black Guys,” which leads to some hilarious moments. At the same time, it’s a skinny framework for carrying a movie. R. JAMES HELMSWORTH. Bridgeport, Clackamas, Division, Fox Tower, Lloyd.

C+ Indian mathematician and autodidact Srinivasa Ramanujan (Dev Patel) struggles through racism and cultural bigotry along his way to solving the secrets of fancy theorems with formally trained English mathematician G.H. Hardy (Jeremy Irons) in writer-director Matt Brown’s second feature film. While math may be a glorious concept that binds us all to the fabric of the universe, chalkboards full of algorithms are not particularly cinematic. PG-13. CURTIS COOK. Bridgeport, Cedar Hills, City Center, Clackamas, Fox Tower.

The Meddler

C Just as her thick eyeglasses turn her brown eyes into saucers, Susan Sarandon magnifies all angles of her worrywart mother character, the titular Meddler. From writer-director Lorene Scafaria (Nick & Norah’s Infinite Playlist),


Hello, My Name is Doris

B Doris is a whip-smart comedy that pokes fun at the ultra-curated youthful lifestyle, while avoiding the recent trope of seniors finding a place amid the nostalgic fascination of millennials. You can almost feel John trying not to laugh as he offers custom-blended artisanal cocktails to Doris during Friendsgiving at his place. PG-13. LAUREN TERRY. Living Room Theaters, Tigard.


B- Based on J.G. Ballard’s novel of the same name, High-Rise follows Dr. Robert Laing (Tom Hiddleston) as he adjusts to living in an all-inclusive apartment building designed by the Architect (Jeremy Irons). The luxuries of Dr. Laing’s new domicile rapidly deteriorate as his neighbors begin to wage a literal class war, succumbing to their animalistic instincts, until people are having sex in the hallways and roasting dogs on a spit. If you’re willing to suspend your disbelief, forgo the luxury of a cohesive plot and stomach the heavyhanded metaphor for contemporary classism and urbanization, then director Ben Wheatley will take you on a visually captivating journey through an orgy of violence and mayhem. R. CURTIS COOK. Cinema 21, Kiggins.

A Hologram for the King





B You might’ve expected a film aimed at politically centrist and optimistic parents from Tom Hanks’ production company (Larry Crowne, Charlie Wilson’s War). A fish-out-of-water tale about an obsolete American salesman peddling IT to Saudi royalty, the film’s telegraphed cultural clashes aren’t xenophobic or exploitative, just safe and sentimental. Quips about forbidden alcohol in the Kingdom here, a polite misunderstanding about the CIA there. If you can buy the tone—and Hanks is doing his everyman damndest to convince you of this endeavor’s beating heart—it falls back on the clever flourishes of Dave Eggers’ source material. R. CHANCE SOLEM-PFEIFER. Fox Tower, Tigard.

The Huntsman: Winter’s War

B It’s been called an unnecessary sequel. And it may be, but as a steadfast lover of swords and sorcery films, I must steadfastly protect it like the Citadel Guards of Gondor. This sequel functions as both a prequel and sequel to the first film, and it actually does a competent job of completely leaving out Snow White. The thing is, Kristen Stewart as Snow White was the worst thing about the first film. She functioned almost solely as a lightly emoting MacGuffin with too much screen time. Snow White’s absence is more than made up for by a very game Jessica Chastain as the huntsman’s feisty partner, who is a lot of fun as a badass warrior, and Chris Hemsworth does Hemsworth well as the over-cocky, macho title character. Compared to similar genre entries recently, like The Last Witch Hunter, 47 Ronin and Seventh Son, it’s practically a masterpiece, and if I was 13 years old, it might be my favorite film. PG-13. EZRA JOHNSON-GREENOUGH. City Center, Clackamas, Division, Oak Grove, Tigard.

FACE-MELTING: Belladona of Sadness

Belladonna of Bong Hits “I belong in Hell,” a fallen peasant wife named Jeanne says. After her brutal rape on her wedding night at the hands of a repugnant, skull-faced Baron, she is seduced by the Devil himself and pledges her soul to the practice of black sorcery in the name of bitter revenge. She has become as terrifying as she is beautiful. She has become the “Belladonna of Sadness.” Belladonna of Sadness is screening for the first time ever in the United States, at Portland’s Hollywood Theatre. The cinema got a 4K remaster of this idiosyncratic and transgressive 1973 anime feature prior to its issue on Blu-ray. Belladonna’s action comes from a camera slowly panning over static watercolor scenes. Matter-of-fact narration by a woman with a calm voice punctuates the scroll, offering remarks on the dark proceedings with a distinct lack of empathy, while hallucinatory musical numbers show the remarkable atrocities conjured from Hell and transmitted through Jeanne, who has become the feminine vessel of pure evil. As Jeanne brings bubonic plague to her village, phased electric guitar swirls around electronically processed screams of women in agony. Depicted as a troupe of disgusting lampreys with undulating worm-filled mouths and baggy red eyes, the plague dances in zombie lockstep, intercut with a relief sculpture of the village melting into a puddle of vile black goo. This is not viewing for the timid or the casual stoner looking for a good time. You can’t just sit back and take bong hits to this, as you would with Heavy Metal. While the animation itself is limited, every second of Belladonna is jam-packed with searing images of disturbing, erotic violence that make Ralph Bakshi’s Coonskin or Heavy Traffic look like something you’d see on the Home Shopping Channel. In the rare instances when the film is fully animated, the explosive visuals leave you momentarily dazed. The subject matter is dour, there is a dearth of likable characters, and the plot progression is muddled, but it doesn’t really matter. This film exists primarily to exhibit its lurid and vivid phantasmagoria of colors that drip and congeal like blood as bodies melt and faces burn. It’s impossible to look away, especially when you want to. MIKE GALLUCCI.

Belladonna of Sadness gets its first-ever U.S. screening at the Hollywood.

B SEE IT: Belladonna of Sadness is unrated. It opens Friday at the Hollywood Theatre.

the script’s bones are a meaningful reversal of mother-daughter grief and recovery, but they’re forced to support Blues Traveler cameos, a weed-eating gag and a clique of Angeleno bridesmaids. Like a daughter to her prying mother, the film should toss up a palm to broad comedy tropes and ask to live its life. PG-13. CHANCE SOLEMPFEIFER. Bridgeport, Cedar Hills, City Center, Clackamas, Fox Tower, Hollywood.

Midnight Special

B The premise of a magical boy

running from the government sounds trite. But add a clever, light-handed screenplay, take away the kitschy magic, and include a dark take on the increasing flow of data through satellites, and you’ve got a fresh, modern science-fiction film. PG-13. LAUREN TERRY. Academy, Laurelhurst.

Miles Ahead

B Fans looking for a solely reverent portrait of Miles Davis won’t get it in Miles Ahead, the new, loosely biographical film on the jazz legend. Instead, Don Cheadle, who wrote, produced, directed and stars in the film, delivers a more complete picture of Davis as a groundbreaking musician who was also an abusive drug addict. R. SOPHIA JUNE. Cinema 21.

Money Monster

C- George Clooney stars as a financial TV show host in the vein of Mad Money’s Jim Cramer, with Julia Roberts as his capable director and Jack O’Connell as the gunman who takes the studio hostage during a live broadcast. The gunman, an average joe seeking revenge for the savings he lost when Clooney’s character promoted bad stocks, is fed up with the 1 percent screwing the little guy. Like a good Bernie Bro, he’s out to expose it all. But like Jon Snow, he knows nothing, and the plot devolves into an unbelievably absurd investigation into the nefarious management of a stock that went tits up, treating the audience like the same fools the rich and powerful think we are. R. EZRA JOHNSON-GREENOUGH. Bridgeport, Cedar Hills, City Center, Clackamas, Division, Eastport, Living Room Theaters, Lloyd, Oak Grove, St. Johns 1 & 2, Tigard, Vancouver.

Mother’s Day

D Unless you’re anticipating something other than Garry Marshall’s recent soulless romcoms (Valentine’s Day, New Year’s Eve), this is exactly what you’d expect. The two-dimensional characters represent a range of maternal strife, from an orphaned young mother (Britt Robertson) seeking to reconnect with her birth mom, to the Home Shopping Network empress (Julia Roberts) hiding a predictable secret. It is too bad, because more laughter might’ve distracted from the awkward demographics in this caucasian version of Atlanta. PG-13. LAUREN TERRY. Bridgeport, Cedar Hills, City Center, Clackamas, Division, Fox Tower, Tigard, Vancouver.

Neighbors 2: Sorority Rising

B- Following classic stories of friendship and sexual fumbles like Harold & Kumar and Revenge of the Nerds, Neighbors 2 is a dumb comedy that captures freshman year 2016 from a feminine perspective. Continuing the story of cool parents Seth Rogen and Rose Byrne, and their poor decision to live so close to campus, the focus shifts toward the newly established anti-sorority on the block, headed by Chloë Grace Moretz. Nicholas Stoller returns to write and direct this sequel, making smart use of millennial ineptitude and letting the comedic tone get weirder. Zac Efron’s perma-bro persona, Teddy, is now a hilariously tragic figure as the oldest employee at Abercrombie & Fitch, at one point slurping baby food shirtless while asking to crash at Rogen’s. Ten seconds into Teddy’s speech about the integrity of Greek sisterhood, the girls are on their phones, voting to kick the “old, hot guy” out of the house. He’s sufficiently prepared for the real

world now that he’s explained how rent equals five buckets of crumpled dollar bills. While a handful of scenes approach John Waters levels of obscurity, you’re going to need to get properly stoned to roll with a version of feminism that empowers girls to bro out. R. LAUREN TERRY. Bridgeport, Cedar Hills, City Center, Clackamas, Division, Eastport, Lloyd, Oak Grove, Pioneer Place, St. Johns Pub and Theater, Tigard, Vancouver.


The Nice Guys

A- The Nice Guys exists in some

weird, hyperviolent mirror image of Los Angeles—one that looks a lot like Atlanta. It’s like Roger Rabbit’s Toontown, but populated with cartoons that bleed. The Nice Guys plays like a 1970s spiritual sequel to writerdirector Shane Black’s 2005 Kiss Kiss Bang Bang, a winking landmark of self-aware grit that revitalized Robert Downey Jr.’s career. And it’s kind of perfect. The plot is inconsequential, involving a dead porn star, a bunch of gangsters, a missing student, some more gangsters and the auto industry. But all of that is just an excuse to get its perfectly cast stars lobbing insults. Showing comic chops that belie his fuckhead reputation, Russell Crowe is hilarious as a broad-bodied bruiser. He’s paired with Ryan Gosling’s shrill, alcoholic PI, whose Buster Keatonesque clumsiness adds “physical comedy” to the résumé of one of our generation’s biggest powerhouses. Investigating murder and missing persons, they fire off staccato quips as they rocket between scenes—including a crackerjack centerpiece at a mermaid-themed porn party. This movie starts at full speed and never stops. R. AP KRYZA. Bridgeport, Cedar Hills, Cine Magic, City Center, Clackamas, Division, Eastport, Fox Tower, Lloyd, Oak Grove, Tigard, Vancouver.

The Revenant

A- In terms of pure spectacle and cinematic beauty, Alejandro González Iñárritu’s The Revenant approaches masterpiece status. R. Vancouver.

Sing Street

A A New Wave rock-’n’-roll fairy tale set in early-’80s Dublin, for fans of quality nostalgia fare like Freaks & Geeks. A 15-year-old boy (Ferdia Walsh-Peelo) seeks to escape the harsh reality of his brutal schoolmasters and splintering home. Under the tutelage of his hash-smoking, dole-surfing older brother, he discovers Duran Duran videos and Cure albums. The story is about as believable as Almost Famous or School of Rock, but that’s not the point. This film fondly recalls John Hughes, tips its hat to Wes Anderson, and repeatedly nods to Back to the Future and “Thriller.” PG-13. NATHAN CARSON. Cedar Hills, Clackamas, Fox Tower, Tigard, Vancouver.

Star Wars: The Force Awakens

A- If there’s one thing we know about Star Wars fans, it’s that they’re as resistant to change as any religious zealot. And so, the best thing that can be said about The Force Awakens is that it’s almost old-fashioned. PG-13. Empirical, Valley.

You nominated your favorites

Voting Categories: Food & Drink Arts & Culture Health & Wellness Media & Personalities Local Businesses Night Life Outdoor Cannabis

Whiskey Tango Foxtrot

C+ Tina Fey stars in this light comedy about the war in Afghanistan. R. Laurelhurst.


B Every dynamic, doe-eyed character in this animated adventure brings laughs for the kids, and hope for adults that their children won’t adopt Donald Trump ideals. There’s a lesson under every hoof, inside every snout, and behind every bubbly buttocks. PG. AMY WOLFE. Bridgeport, Cedar Hills, City Center, Clackamas, Division, Lloyd, Oak Grove, Pioneer Place, Tigard.

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For more Movies listings, visit Willamette Week MAY 25, 2016



end roll

surgery on yourself—an accountant is also much cheaper than a tax attorney.


Don’t tell your landlord. Guess what? They have noses! And eyes! And if there are sheepish 20-somethings walking around with small, brown bags, it won’t take long for them to find out. The fine print of most rental agreements states that you must comply with all state and federal laws.


Believe that anyone, including you, can grow great weed. Yes, it’s easy to sprout and grow a few marijuana leaves. But you need more than YouTube videos and sunshine to grow something better than ditch weed. The research conducted by good growers equates to a bachelor’s degree.

19 Ways to Fail in the Weed Industry BY L AU R E N T E R RY



Like moths to a dab torch, people continue leaving lucrative jobs, leveraging their homes, and draining their 401(k)s to pan for keef in the great Green Rush. And yet, it’s not that easy—obviously. I spoke with local lawyer Samuel Grosz, who explained why he starts any client consultation involving cannabis with a 20-minute series of caveats. He specializes in tax, real estate and marijuana law, and he’s seen his share of train wrecks—though his input here should not be considered legal advice. I’m a medical patient, and after working at a great dispensary, a failed dispensary, and a medical grow, I’ve observed a few potholes to avoid. We decided to break down some of the common traps that lie ahead. Here’s what not to do.


Loan your kid money to start a dispensary. You aren’t going to get that money back. Even if he or she did a solid job supplementing tuition through dormitory pot deals, do they have a fighting chance in a hyper-regulated and hyper-competitive industry?


Start worrying about taxes in March. Regardless of your social-media skills or your product’s sleek packaging and great quality, being unprepared for taxes will end your business within the year. Remember, Al Capone did not go to jail for selling booze and murdering rivals—he went to jail for tax evasion.


Learn how to grow pot from a hydroponics store. Gardening-supply stores know how to sell gardening equipment; they don’t know how to grow weed. If you read the ingredients list, many of the mass-produced nutrients are water and chemicals. Talking to friends with healthy vegetable gardens is more effective.


Be your own bookkeeper. The road to hell is paved with good intentions. It doesn’t matter how familiar you are with Microsoft Excel, you won’t regret paying someone who’s qualified. Doing your own bookkeeping is sort of like performing


1979 NW VAUGHN ST. SUITE B PORTLAND, OR 97209 HOURS: 11-7, 7 days a week Just North of the Pearl District.




Make more money from your weed by shipping it to California. The quickest way to get the federal guys with ski goggles and search warrants to knock on your door is to rent a U-Haul and make a short trip down south.


Live like a king. We understand the excitement of seeing the profits from your first harvest. Before you head to the Mercedes dealer, take a moment to notice that most successful dispensary owners haven’t bought new cars, don’t have summer homes on the coast, and still wear the same flannel shirts they wore in college. Cash is king, and you will need plenty on hand to grow your business.


Make significant agreements with a handshake or text message. Yes, a company actually entered into an agreement to purchase over $1 million in equipment via text messages—guess how this turned out? You have now entered a legal business, so you can’t just send Eddie the Enforcer to straighten out a disagreement.


Interpret legislation and rules by yourself. Ignorance of the law is not a good defense.


Name your new product “Dummy Worms.” Besides the possible trademark infringement, you’ll lose your license if the Oregon Health Authority interprets your bad pun as marketing toward minors.

k Store e e W e t t ame Th e Wi l l

Name your business “Bob’s Best Buds.” Some banks that cash checks from businesses clearly dealing with marijuana and shady contractors will tack on extra charges for “discretion.”


Assume customers will always pay this much. It’s easy to see $20 prices on a gram of flower and think growers are raking it in. The majority of profits goes to overhead and licensing fees. Be aware that prices change depending on supply and demand.


Don’t carry insurance. Dispensaries and grows are targets for thieves, and pot’s legality doesn’t make it less valuable. Anyone in the business knows a friend or colleague who has been the victim of theft.


Spend tons of money on merchandise. You have no idea when a new city or state tax will be imposed, and if it does, you’ll regret the recent order of 4,000 PDX carpetthemed shirts. Oh yeah, and don’t forget how much you owe your investors. Keep your shelves full, but your backroom empty.


Lease a location in a city that bans marijuana sales. Some cities, like Gresham, have banned the sale of marijuana. So you find a store with a Portland address, and you’re good to go, right? Wrong. Just because the address says one city, the property may actually be located in another city. If you signed the lease, the landlord can make your mistake very expensive.


Argue that your shitty location will be fine. If you build it, they won’t come. Unless your building is easily accessible to someone making a rash decision to exit a major thoroughfare, give it up. I don’t care how easy a right turn, quick left, and another left look on paper.


Hire an expensive consultant. Hiring a consultant costing $20,000 per month and requiring you to hand over 20 percent of your company is not a sure way to success—unless you’re the consultant.


Be your own best customer. Finish processing those transfer forms before making sure the Sour Bhotz are still potent.



wiTh a DubDubDeal!


Willamette Week MAY 25, 2016


We’ve got plenty of affordable offers to start the year off right. Find certificate discounts to some of your favorite Portland restaurants. Visit

BY N at e Wag g o N e r

Cat and Girl

Willamette Week MAY 25, 2016





Willamette Week MAY 25, 2016


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AUTO PROCESSING PLANT North Portland. Men & Women, must drive stick shift 360-718-7443

FOR FREE ADS in 'Musicians Wanted,' 'Musicians Available' & 'Instruments for Sale' go to and submit ads online. Ads taken over the phone in these categories cost $5.

Play what you want to play.


With 2-time Grammy winner Peter Boe 503-274-8727

McMenamins Portland locations are now hiring Line Cooks!

Hiring locations include The Ram’s Head, Blue Moon, White Eagle, Ringlers, Broadway and Bagdad Theater. Qualified applicants must be open to cooking in a high-volume and busy pub environment. Qualified applicants will have an open & flexible schedule including days/eve/weekend/ holiday availability, and a positive and professional demeanor. Previous kitchen experience is a plus, but we are willing to train the right applicant if you are eager to learn. Please apply online 24/7 at mcmenamins. com or pick up an application at any McMenamins location. Mail your complete application to: McMenamins attn: HR 430 N. Killingsworth St. Portland, OR 97217 or fax to: (503) 2218749. Please no phone calls or emails to individual locations!!! EOE



McMenamins Edgefield is NOW HIRING!

Come to our job fair, on Thursday, May 26th, 2016. Walk ins welcome from 12pm to 5pm! We have both seasonal and long term opportunities available. Current openings include, Line Cooks, Prep Cooks, Dishwashers, Servers, Foodrunners/Bussers, Catering Servers, Bartenders, Hosts, Housekeepers and more! What we need from you: An open and flexible schedule, including days, evenings, weekends and holidays; Previous experience is preferred, but we are willing to train ; A love of working in a busy, customer serviceoriented environment. Interested in a career in the hospitality industry? We offer opportunities for advancement as well as an excellent benefit package to eligible employees, including vision, medical, chiropractic, dental and so much more! Apply online 24/7 at or stop by the Edgefield, anytime to fill out an application. EOE.

McMenamins GRAND LODGE is having a JOB FAIR! All Positions!

Join us on THURSDAY, JUNE 2nd from 3pm to 7pm. Managers will be on hand to talk to interested applicants. Current openings include, Line Cooks, Dishwashers, Servers, Foodrunners/ Bussers, Catering Servers, Bartenders, Hosts, Theater Servers, Spa LMT’s and more! What we need from you: An open and flexible schedule, including days, evenings, weekends and holidays; Previous experience is preferred, but we are willing to train! ; A love of working in a busy, customer service-oriented environment; Seasonal and Long term positions are available. Interested in a career in the hospitality industry? We offer opportunities for advancement as well as an excellent benefit package to eligible employees, including vision, medical, chiropractic, dental and so much more! If you cannot attend the job fair, you can still apply online 24/7 at EOE.

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MISCELLANEOUS ONLY WORDS? By the BLESSING of the Upright, the City is exalted; BUT it is overthrown by the mouth of the wicked (cussing)! Pr 11:11 (Join us in Prayer, that God’s Blessings will come upon Portland)


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Willamette Week Classifieds MAY 25, 2016




503-445-2757 •



by Matt Jones

“Plays With Words”–you can’t avoid the drama. Life” 60 Canadian singer/ songwriter ___ Naked 61 See 55-Across 63 Honolulu hangable 64 The Care Bear ___ 65 13th-century Mongol invader 66 “C’___ la vie!” 67 Tissue issue 68 Drummer Peter of Kiss


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Across 1 Alter, as text 6 Does in, slangily 10 Org. that enforces liquid regulations 13 Carpenter’s joint 14 Pouty expressions 16 “Bali ___” 17 Ibsen play with unintelligible dialogue? 19 Shade thrower? 20 “And that’s the way ___” 21 Chekhov play about the empty spaces in wine barrels?

23 Cleveland cager, for short 24 Classic 1950 film noir 25 First-year class, slangily 26 “Family Feud” host Harvey 28 Geek blogger Wheaton 31 Golfer Isao ___ 32 Group with pitchforks and torches 36 Captain Hansen of “Deadliest Catch” 37 O’Neill play about a brand-new

theater? 41 “Oedipus ___” 42 “California Dreamin’” singer 43 Speedy breed of steed, for short 45 Prevailed 46 Like some IPAs 50 T-shirt store freebie, maybe 52 Dot-___ boom 54 “Much ___ About Nothing” 55 With 61-Across, Williams play about living quarters on a tram? 59 “___ American

Down 1 Business school subject 2 Convene in 3 Fancy salad green 4 They can mean “yes” 5 Hereditary helix 6 University of Nebraska campus site 7 “Watch out for flying golf balls!” 8 Afrocentric clothing line since 1992 9 Behave like a bear 10 “What’s good for ___ ...” 11 Marketing rep’s product package 12 Aspires to greatness 15 Starter starter? 18 “Little” car in a 1964 hit 22 First name of a Fighting Irish legend 24 Jean jacket material 27 “Wet/dry” buy 28 Jane who

divorced Reagan 29 ‘98 Apple 30 Last word of a Ricky Martin hit 33 Chew like a beaver 34 San ___ (Italian Riviera city) 35 “___ Buddies” (Tom Hanks sitcom) 37 Like bartered things 38 Inquisition targets 39 Tailor’s goal 40 AOL competitor, once 44 Where Moscow Mules may be served 47 “Mutiny on the Bounty” island 48 Nike competitor 49 Difficult questions 51 Microscope piece 52 Air Force student 53 Boston Bruins Hall of Famer Bobby 56 Grub 57 IRS agent, for short 58 0, in Spain 59 Emperor that hasn’t been around for 99 years 62 Enumeration shortcut last week’s answers

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Classified 46

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©2016 Rob Brezsny

Week of May 26


ARIES (March 21-April 19) To convey the best strategy for you to employ in the coming weeks, I have drawn inspiration from a set of instructions composed by aphorist Alex Stein: Scribble, scribble, erase. Scribble, erase, scribble. Scribble, scribble, scribble, scribble. Erase, erase, erase. Scribble, erase. Keep what’s left. In other words, Aries, you have a mandate to be innocently empirical, robustly experimental, and cheerfully improvisational -- with the understanding that you must also balance your fun with ruthless editing. TAURUS (April 20-May 20) “One must think like a hero to behave like a merely decent human being,” wrote Taurus memoirist May Sarton. That’s a dauntingly high standard to live up to, but for the foreseeable future it’s important that you try. In the coming weeks, you will need to maintain a heroic level of potency and excellence if you hope to keep your dreams on track and your integrity intact. Luckily, you will have an extraordinary potential to do just that. But you’ll have to work hard to fulfill the potential -- as hard as a hero on a quest to find the real Holy Grail in the midst of all the fake Holy Grails. GEMINI (May 21-June 20) “Whatever you’re meant to do, do it now,” said novelist Doris Lessing. “The conditions are always impossible.” I hope you take her advice to heart, Gemini. In my astrological opinion, there is no good excuse for you to postpone your gratification or to procrastinate about moving to the next stage of a big dream. It’s senseless to tell yourself that you will finally get serious as soon as all the circumstances are perfect. Perfection does not and will never exist. The future is now. You’re as ready as you will ever be. CANCER (June 21-July 22) French painter Henri Matisse didn’t mind being unmoored, befuddled, or in-between. In fact, he regarded these states as being potentially valuable to his creative process. Here’s his testimony: “In art, truth and reality begin when one no longer understands what one is doing or what one knows.” I’m recommending that you try out his attitude, Cancerian. In my astrological opinion, the time has come for you to drum up the inspirations and revelations that become available when you don’t know where the hell you are and what the hell you’re doing. LEO (July 23-Aug. 22) Proposed experiment: Imagine that all the lovers and would-be lovers you have ever adored are in your presence. Review in detail your memories of the times you felt thrillingly close to them. Fill yourself up with feelings of praise and gratitude for their mysteries. Sing the love songs you love best. Look into a mirror and rehearse your “I only have eyes for you” gaze until it is both luminous and smoldering. Cultivate facial expressions that are full of tender, focused affection. Got all that, Leo? My purpose in urging you to engage in these practices is that it’s the High Sexy Time of year for you. You have a license to be as erotically attractive and wisely intimate as you dare. VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22) “Consider how hard it is to change yourself and you’ll understand what little chance you have in trying to change others,” wrote editor Jacob M. Braude. Normally I would endorse his poignant counsel, but for the foreseeable future I am predicting that the first half of it won’t fully apply to you. Why? Because you are entering a phase that I regard as unusually favorable for the project of transforming yourself. It may not be easy to do so, but it’ll be easier than it has been in a long time. And I bet you will find the challenge to reimagine, reinvent, and reshape yourself at least as much fun as it is hard work. LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 22) “Never turn down an adventure without a really good reason,” says author Rebecca Solnit in her book The Far Away Nearby. That’s a thought she had as she contemplated the possibility of riding a raft down the Colorado River and through the Grand Canyon. Here’s how I suspect this meditation applies to you, Libra: There have been other times and there will be other times when you

will have good reasons for not embarking on an available adventure. But now is not one of those moments. SCORPIO (Oct. 23-Nov. 21) Russian poet Vera Pavlova tells about how once when she was using a pen and paper to jot down some fresh ideas, she got a paper cut on her palm. Annoying, right? On the contrary. She loved the fact that the new mark substantially extended her life line. The palmistry-lover in her celebrated. I’m seeing a comparable twist in your near future, Scorpio. A minor inconvenience or mild setback will be a sign that a symbolic revitalization or enhancement is nigh. SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21) Norway is mountainous, but its neighbor Finland is quite flat. A group of Norwegians has launched a campaign to partially remedy the imbalance. They propose that to mark the hundredth anniversary of Finland’s independence, their country will offer a unique birthday gift: the top of Halti mountain. Right now the 4,479-foot peak is in Norway. But under the proposed plan, the border between countries will be shifted so that the peak will be transferred to Finland. I would love you to contemplate generous gestures like this in the coming weeks, Sagittarius. It’s a highly favorable time for you to bestow extra imaginative blessings. (P.S. The consequences will be invigorating to your own dreams.) CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19) I believe that every one of us should set aside a few days every year when we celebrate our gaffes, our flaws, and our bloopers. During this crooked holiday, we are not embarrassed about the false moves we have made. We don’t decry our bad judgment or criticize our delusional behavior. Instead, we forgive ourselves of our sins. We work to understand and feel compassion for the ignorance that led us astray. Maybe we even find redemptive value in our apparent lapses; we come to see that they saved us from some painful experience or helped us avoid getting a supposed treasure that would have turned out to be a booby prize. Now would be a perfect time for you to observe this crooked holiday. AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18) Sometimes the love you experience for those you care about makes you feel vulnerable. You may worry about being out of control or swooping so deeply into your tenderness that you lose yourself. Giving yourself permission to cherish and nurture can make you feel exposed, even unsafe. But none of that applies in the coming weeks. According to my interpretation of the astrological omens, love will be a source of potency and magnificence for you. It will make you smarter, braver, and cooler. Your words of power will be this declaration by Syrian poet Nizar Qabbani: “When I love / I feel that I am the king of time / I possess the earth and everything on it / and ride into the sun upon my horse.” (Translated by Lena Jayyusi and Christopher Middleton.) PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20) In November 1916, at the height of World War I, the Swedish schooner Jönköping set sail for Finland, carrying 4,400 bottles of champagne intended for officers of the occupying Russian army. But the delivery was interrupted. A hostile German submarine sunk the boat, and the precious cargo drifted to the bottom of the Baltic Sea. The story didn’t end there, however. More than eight decades later, a Swedish salvage team retrieved a portion of the lost treasure, which had been well-preserved in the frosty abyss. Taste tests revealed that the bubbly alcholic beverage was “remarkably light-bodied, extraordinarily elegant and fantastically fresh, with discreet, slow-building toasty aromas of great finesse.” (Source: I foresee the potential of a similar resurrection in your future, Pisces. How deep are you willing to dive?

Homework Confess, brag, and expostulate about what inspires you to love. Go to and click “Email Rob.”

check out Rob Brezsny’s Expanded Weekly Audio Horoscopes & Daily Text Message Horoscopes

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42 30 willamette week, may 25, 2016  
42 30 willamette week, may 25, 2016