MASTERY MASTERY MAGAZINE MAGAZINE SELF Is Burnout Preventable Mama Mama Me-Time Me-Time
““Self-mastery Self-mastery is the challenge iof s the challenge of transforming tyourself ransforming yourself from your own fworst rom your own worst enemy into eyour nemy into your greatest gally. reatest ally.” ” WES WFESLER ES FESLER
I’m delighted to have an opportunity to have your readership, and I Ihope ’m delighted to have an opportunity to have your readership, and I hope you will enjoy every article and every page as much as we did creating ythis ou will enjoy every article and every page as much as we did creating this publication. publication.
FROM THE FFOUNDER ROM THE FOUNDER
The vision behind this magazine is to motivate, inspire, and empower Tyou, he vision behind this magazine is to motivate, inspire, and empower you, my dear reader, to have faith that everything is possible, and that YOU mare y dear reader, to have faith that everything is possible, and that YOU are the tPLACEBO. he PLACEBO. As you immerse yourself in the journeys and transformations of our Aauthors, s you immerse yourself in the journeys and transformations of our authors, you will be convinced that challenges are only temporary and that they yare ou will be convinced that challenges are only temporary and that they are put in our paths to make us grow Just like the muscle tissue that has to pbe ut in our paths to make us grow. Just like the muscle tissue that has to be torn to be regenerated, to then bulk up and get stronger, we are tcreated orn to be regenerated, to then bulk up and get stronger, we are created the same way. Obstacles are stepping stones. Lessons are our blessings. tA he same way Obstacles are stepping stones Lessons are our blessings A new word ‘Blessons’ has emerged to describe just that. I hope you can nadd ew word ‘Blessons’ has emerged to describe just that I hope you can add it to your vocabulary, and use it when life throws a new rock at you. iThank t to your vocabulary, and use it when life throws a new rock at you. Thank life for your “blesson”, open yourself to the possibility, to the unknown, lto ife for your “blesson”, open yourself to the possibility, to the unknown, to the miracles that follow every challenge, just like a rainbow that is tbound he miracles that follow every challenge, just like a rainbow that is bound to come out after a train o come out after a rain. We welcome you, our dear reader, to stay in touch, send us your feedback, Wa e welcome you, our dear reader, to stay in touch, send us your feedback, a review*, your questions, topics you’d like us to cover in future issues, rand eview*, your questions, topics you’d like us to cover in future issues, and so son. o on If you have a transformational story that made you a better person, Iplease f you have a transformational story that made you a better person, please reach out to us to apply to become a contributor in one of the rfuture each out to us to apply to become a contributor in one of the future iissues. ssues. We also welcome partnerships and collaborations from Waligned e also welcome partnerships and collaborations from aligned organizations and obusinesses rganizations and businesses. Enjoy the reading, share, subscribe, join our community, and watch Eour njoy the reading, share, subscribe, join our community, and watch our videocast! Let’s create a Positive Impact movement together, one person vat ideocast! Let’s create a Positive Impact movement together, one person at a atime! time!
Note from the Editor in Chief ANNOUNCEMENT: We are accepting part time internship applications from creative and detailed oriented individuals. Apply to Collaborate or Join Our Team at SelfMasteryMagazine.com Welcome and Thank You As a multi faceted media professional, working in the publication industry as the chief editor is a dream come true. Megan Flahart Smith Focused on Self Mastering and the bettering one's self, I am looking for articles that truly impact, educate and provide tips that can be implemented immediately. About the Editor in Chief Megan is the founder and creative mastermind behind MFS Digital Marketing. @mfsdigitalmarketing www mfsdigitalmarketing con Megan thrives in creating content that lifts women up and makes them visible to their ideal audience in a way that is out of the box and integrates the essence of your business in every piece.
what's happening www. selfmasterymagazine.com Focusing on men and those who want to be by their side ready to support, encourage, and uplift. Come learn from inspiring stories of men who hit rock bottom, climbed out of it, and how they did it. Learn coping techniques and strategies. MEN'S MENTAL WELLNESS SUMMIT Last 3 days of September 2022 Virtual Summit Register Today Click Here Workshop dedicated to helping businesses widen their digital footprint. Julia Vitality invites you to work with her in 'done for you' PR concierge program. http://DigitalPR.Works DIGITAL PUBLIC RELATIONS WORKSHOPS Recurring Online Event by Zoom An interactive LIVE Panel of experts discussing relevant hot topics around entrepreneurship and wellness. Contact us to join as an expert. LIVE PANEL OF EXPERTS (WELLNESS & BUSINESS) Every 2nd and 4th Thursday of every month 11AM & 12PM EST Join our FB community facebook.com/groups/pitvg UPCOMING save the sdate! ave the date! https://www.facebook.com/groups/pitvg
"You don't stumble upon your heritage. It's there, just waiting to be explored and shared"”
""One's "One's One's heritage hand eritage hand eritage and roots ris oots ris oots is something sto omething sto to be proud bof e proud bof e proud of and acherished" nd acherished" nd cherished" Sonja SMorgan onja SMorgan onja Morgan
“We may have different religions, different languages, different colored skin, but we all belong to one human race.” – Kofi Annan
By Ohouo Goa
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Relationships AUGUST 2022 DATE YOURSELF TO SELF-INTIMACY
Who am I? I don’t know anymore. I am no longer who I thought I was. I am not who I am today. And I don’t know how to merge the two and be my authentic self because of my scars and past. This was me a few years ago. I was lost because I believed my identity was my circumstances.
www. selfmasterymagazine.com In the midst of my pain, I had to choose myself over my demons and circumstances How did I do that? In three words. Self intimacy. Self acceptance. Self awareness. My approach date myself to self intimacy. 1. Heal your wounds and traumas You need to descend into your abyss to truly understand your emotions and discover their origins Once you have understanding then you can recalibrate and with calibration comes healing and new beginnings. Why descend to your abyss? So you may fully accept yourself and be aware of your beliefs and triggers since you can’t change or heal what you don’t know. In other words, self intimacy is a journey of clarity, understanding, self acceptance, and self awareness. Collabs AUGUST 2022 BENEFITS OF SELF INTIMACY By Ohouo Goa
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Flirting with your demons and getting to know yourself will help you transcend from your conscious mind to to your subconscious, which holds the key to your limiting beliefs and traumas. Your connection with your subconscious will allow you to uncover any repressed emotions or events, so you may find the right outlet to heal, release, and reframe. Ohouo Goa
Collabs AUGUST 2022 RELEASE REPRESSED EMOTIONS By
How to Reach Self Intimacy? Simple. Date yourself to self-intimacy. Self-intimacy will enable you to connect with who you are while building your resilience and self intimacy muscles. How would you reach self-intimacy? You may do so through solo dates or solo trips. BE YOUR AUTHENTIC SELF TIP
Once you have accepted yourself fully, the good and the bad, the past and the present, and your circumstances you can unapologetically be yourself. You need self-intimacy and self-acceptance to shine your genius and accept yourself as a whole. Consequently, you need courage to heal and be your true self with confidence despite the norms.
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www.
Tips to Date Yourself PRACTICAL ADVICE by Ohouo Goa
Start with an inviting environment where you can spark a conversation with strangers. Yes, the objective is to step outside of your comfort zone, dare, discover yourself, and build your intimacy and resilience muscles so what better way than being uncomfortable. selfmasterymagazine.com
Collabs
Dating yourself is a magical tool to understand yourself, heal your heart, release, and be. Set a weekly routine. Mark your calendars with weekly self date appointments. Same day and possibly same time to minimize self resistance.
Here are a few more practical tips: Make a reservation because then you will be less inclined to cancel. Have an accountability partner that will encourage you to proceed with your plans. Stretch your comfort zone but not too much, otherwise you will be discouraged and will stop Give yourself small and incremental challenges and continuously renew and update them. Make it fun and enjoyable.
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TIPS TO DATE YOURSELF HOW TO REACH SELF INTIMACY? by Ohouo Goa You need to descend into your abyss to truly understand your emotions and discover their origins Date yourself to self intimacy Self intimacy will enable you to connect with who you are while building your resilience and self intimacy muscles. The key to your healing is self intimacy. Yes, you are the KEY to your healing. The key to your healing is self intimacy. Yes, you are the KEY to your healing. So what would you do next? I dare you to date yourself and see the MAGIC unfold. You got this! Highlighted quotes 1. 2 3. About Ohouo Goa Ohouo is a Heartbreak Coach. She helps you be more resilient and transition from heartbreak to ecstasy + self-intimacy. Her life’s trajectory has also been dotted with several breakups forcing her to heal through self intimacy. Hence, she has vowed to help women do the same. Website: www.ohouo.com Email: info@ohouo.com IG: https://www.instagram.com/ ohouo heartbreakcoach/ Visibility
Observe and record your emotions, challenges, fun, lessons, opportunities, and progress in your journal. Give yourself self-date goals and reward yourself for your successes small or big ones. If you decide to have a date at home. Set the tone and ambiance. Dress up and mark your calendars still for a block of time. No visitors or interruptions then. Just spend time with yourself doing something you enjoy The sky is your canvas. www.selfmasterymagazine.com
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www.selfmasterymagazine.com Fitness Who is Thomas Johnson Jr. (TJ). One of the Top Executive Wellness Coaches for Busy Business Professionals Previous Celebrity Personal Trainer certified by National Academy of Sports Medicine and also have a Degree in Food & Nutrition National Posture Institute Posture Specialist recognized by New York Magazine for expertise in Posture and alignment C-Suite Advisor & Philanthropist Civil War survivor that believes in turning your pain into power Specializes in helping high performers improve their wellness long term by focusing on the root cause of their lifestyle habits instead of just a quick fix
When I reflect on the effect of being raised in a communist society, I’m divided. I did have a happy childhood, carefree and innocent, without worries of war, elections, or where the next paycheck is coming from. Mind you, that is from a very limited perspective of a child who was sheltered from reality and adult concerns. I gained a different perspective on life in the Soviet Union a few years after my family moved to Canada, and after I started asking questions and digging. It appears that things were not as rosy as we were made to believe as kids. I learnt that my father was boxed into his scientific role without any prospect of promotion, and that my mother had no career potentials despite a PhD in chemistry. When the USSR fell apart and all their meager savings collapsed to a value of a quarter (25 cents), they were grasping for ways to provide a better future to their children, and themselves in a way. When they heard that Canada was a socialist country, they started making moves quietly, only announcing the final decision to us, the kids, when it was a done deal.
FINDING A NEW HOME COUNTRY BY ACCIDENT by Julia Vitality
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By Julia Vitality
Mayan Riviera Culture Shock Everyone knows that Latin cultures have little respect for time. I experienced it often, and to various degrees. At first full of frustration and a sense of entitlement, I was taught a valuable lesson about the gift of time. Now, if someone cancels an appointment last-minute, or simply doesn’t show up, I view it as a gift of time. I get to use this time for something else, something next on my to-do list. Fast forward 2 years, and I feel more at home in Mayan Riviera than I ever felt in 20 years in Canada. I don’t speak Spanish fluently, but enough to get by. I get a lot of encouragement to learn the language and a lot of validation from the locals for knowing as little as I do. With this level of English I would be undergoing constant embarrassment in Canada, a ‘mullti-cultural’ nation. But in reality, Mexicans are a lot more accepting of my limited Spanish, an obvious accent, and quite frequent use of Google Translate. They are happy I’m making an effort. They gave me a temporary residence status just for the fact that I love their country, the food, the music, and the culture. Of course, no place is perfect, and I could go on about Mexico’ s flaws, and what can be improved. However, overall, I think it made me a better person in so many ways. Let me give you a few examples.
Fast forward 20+ years later, I did it again, this time out of my own will. I never really felt at home in Canada. I was itching to go to a place where I could utilize the concept of “ geoarbitrage” , and the pandemic presented the perfect opportunity to do so. Well, it didn’t come overnight. I was studying investing principles, and geo-arbitrage was just one of them. It really appealed to me, and I started researching countries that could offer me that opportunity. When the real estate market in Canada was at its peak, I decided to take advantage of it, sell the house and make the jump. It took some time figuring out where I wanted to move, and I knew central or south America had a better chance than other countries due to being in the same general time zone with Toronto, and the perceived ease of learning Spanish versus, for example, an Asian language. Long story short, Mexico topped the list, although my heart was not really set on it. I thought, if I didn’t like it, I could always come back or try another place.
About Julia: Julia strongly believes that Digital PR works, hence her website name. She thrives on multiplying the impact of transformation coaches, authors, experts, and conscious entrepreneurs, in turn, positively impacting more lives and businesses. Beside teaching her audience to use Digital PR to grow their influence, she showcases incredible talent in the personal development space in her own digital PR channels, the Self Mastery Magazine and the Positive Impact TV videocast.
Many associate Cancun to allinclusive hotels and 5-star dining.
Well, that’ s just 2% of Cancun. The rest of the city with a population of almost 2-million is working class immigrants, yes, immigrants from all over Mexico, Latin America and the rest of the world. Cancun is only 40-50 years old with the majority of the population coming here from major cities in Mexico to escape the fast pace of life. They are attracted to the ‘big village’ style of living, yet civilized enough to serve all their needs for comfort and safety.
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Another lesson I had to take to heart, which may be hard for some germaphobes to swallow, was that street food is by far the most delicious. Yes, it could be put together by the hands with questionable cleanliness, and the open air setting may invite a few extra insects to the feast, but what doesn’t kill you makes you stronger. And honestly, in the 2 years here, I have only gotten a serious food poisoning 2-3 times after eating at ‘fine-dining’ air conditioned establishments that pride themselves in food quality. So, live like a local, eat like a local…
What a blessing! The rest will work itself out. The plumber will arrive eventually. The internet guy will come 3 hours later, but so what? Life goes on. You get an extra opportunity to be grateful for life, for living in paradise, for being surrounded by genuine loving and simple people, and for an opportunity to dip your feet into turquoise water and white sand if you take a few extra minutes of your busy day to allow yourself that opportunity.
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BLESSINGS www.selfmasterymagazine.com content section here LESSONS MEMORIES
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When you see women vendors on the beach with a newborn baby, and 2 years later, the same little girl is helping her mom sell woven trinkets with joy, coming up to tourists and locals alike, you wonder, what keeps them going, what is their life at home like, and how can they find joy in such a menial task… Mexico is full of life lessons, life questions, and deep truths. It’ s a land of opportunity where real estate and business ownership is encouraged more than it ever was in Canada. It’ s a land of deep-seeded family traditions right alongside emerging gay rights and blatant womanizing. It’ s a place to be real, to fit in, to stand out, to pave your own way, to figure out what you stand for, to live on $1 a day, or on a million. It’ s so diverse, rigid, yet allowing for differences, it really is an incredible place to discover who YOU truly are, what you stand for, and what you will do to chase your dreams. Because in Mexico, it’ s all possible.
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Nomadic Lifestyle
Julia was always drawn to location independence. Her business allows her this lifestyle, and she hopes to explore other continents in the near future. To get in touch with Julia, please visit http://DigitalPR.Works
When you see a family celebrating their matriarch’ s 90’ s birthday and putting a slide show of her life for the family, mariachi’ s singing till 1 am, and tequila flowing freely for all the neighbors, you wonder, what things in life are truly valuable?
By Julia Vitality MEXICO
I could go on forever talking about valuable personal lessons moving to Mexico has taught me, but let me mention a few business benefits also. The slow pace of life is really conducive to the nomadic entrepreneur lifestyle. You have all the luxuries of life minutes away, yet, life itself is fundamentally so much more simple. When you see the landscape maintenance crew, for example, having great conversations and enjoying each other’ s company despite blistering heat and long hours, you wonder, what makes these people so happy and content deep inside. Why don’t they complain and whine? Where is this joy coming from?
Owner and Business Coach of The Fearless Climb Go to www TheFearlessClimb com to download your FREE copy of my book, "Grow a Pair of Antlers: The Fearless Climb to Lead Your Herd" kathleen@thefearlessclimb.com
First, SHARE courageously. Share courageously and show up consistently on social media, at speaking events, in blog posts, and on video. Be authentic and genuine with others. Be willing to put yourself out there and be vulnerable. Tell your stories and empathize with your followers' challenges. Include posts that express what you enjoy, what you struggle with, what you know, and how you can help. When you're open and honest with your audience, they're more likely to connect with you. MORE SALES
Business THE 3 MOST COURAGEOUS ACTIONS SMALL BUSINESS OWNERS CAN TAKE TO CLOSE
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by Kathleen Ries Jubenville
Small business owners often undermine their success by focusing on their fears. Fear holds them back from taking the types of courageous actions that create success.
In this article, I am going to help you overcome your fears and give you the three most courageous actions you can take in your business to attract more leads and close more sales. And I'm going to challenge you to implement one idea in each category this week!
Third, TRY courageously. Be willing to courageously try new things. This can mean creating new products or services, experimenting with marketing techniques, or even just trying something new in your personal life. Stepping out of your comfort zone can be scary, but it's also where the magic happens. Be willing to experiment and fail. It's the only way you'll learn what works and what doesn't When you're passionately trying new things, your courage shows and people will want to follow you. Business What is one story you can tell about yourself that feels a little scary to share with others but is relevant to your target market? Post it on social media this week! Use my hashtag #growapairofantlers so I can cheer you on! Second, GIVE courageously. Freely give value and support to others. It takes courage to be generous with your time, energy, and knowledge. When you do this, people will be drawn to you and your business. They will see you as a leader and an expert in your field. Be confident when talking to potential clients and customers. And sell with a heart to serve. When you believe in yourself and truly care about the success of others they'll be more likely to want to work with you.
CHALLENGE #3: www.selfmasterymagazine.com
CHALLENGE #1: What is one step you've been meaning to take in your business for a long time, but haven't done it yet? Get up one morning this week and just do it! Then, post your journey on social media. Share what worked or what you learned from the process. Use my hashtag #growapairofantlers. If you're looking to attract more leads and close more sales, one path to success is to take courageous actions, then share them with your followers on social media. Authentically share your ideas, your values, your successes, and your struggles. Show your vulnerability and express empathy for the problems of your community. You will connect with those who are aligned with you. You will attract those who could use your help. You will nurture relationships and develop authority in your field. Your business will thank you! So, SHARE courageously. GIVE courageously. And TRY courageously.
CHALLENGE #2: What is one success strategy you can share with your target market that you usually only share with your clients? Post it on social media this week! Use my hashtag #growapairofantlers
www.selfmasterymagazine.com Spirituality
RELATIONSHIP BETWEEN
AND IMPROVED
When you think about spirituality, what’s the first thing that comes to mind? Do you think of some 70 year old guru seated in the meditating Buddha position who has all the answers to life? Or maybe you think of someone who wears baggy pants and has made a pact with the Universe to never shave or bathe again!
What if I told you that spirituality looked like you and me. That's right. Spirituality has less to do with what you look like and more to do with an overall connection with what most call their Higher Self (God). The late spiritual teacher and educator, Dr. Wayne Dyer revealed that we are in fact spiritual beings having a human experience. Not the other way around. UNIQUE SPIRITUALITY HEALTH by Crystal Harrell
BEHAVIORS
THE
Spiritual Questions What does spirituality mean for me? Am I showing up as my true self? What is my connection to the world around me? How can I live my life in the best way possible? How is spirituality different than religiosity?
By Crystal Harrell
www.selfmasterymagazine.com Spirituality
Spirituality has mainly been defined in culture as an aspect of religiosity. However, more recently, many individuals have discovered the non-religious elements of spirituality and the definition has shifted in modern society. Today, spirituality is broadly defined as the sense of connection to something greater than ourselves, and it typically involves a search for meaning in life. Surprisingly, scientific communities have begun to embrace the significant role that one ’ s spiritual connection plays in their overall well-being. A 2017 research study by Joseph and colleagues revealed that spirituality should be understood as “ a more general, unstructured, personalized, and naturally occurring phenomenon, where a person seeks closeness and/or connectedness between him/herself and a higher power or purpose. ”
The term religiosity has been used to refer to the “interpersonal” and “institutional” aspects of spirituality that are derived from participating in a formal religious group ’ s policies, ideals, and traditions, with comembers of a tradition. However, spirituality has been used to refer to the “intrapsychic” experiences of religiosity/spirituality that relate to an individual’ s sense of connection with something transcendent; integration of self; and feelings of awe, gratitude, compassion, and forgiveness.
Religion and spirituality are not the same things, nor are they entirely distinct from one another. To understand this, we will explore some scientific terms used in spiritual/religious research.
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A health behavior is any activity used to prevent or detect disease or to improve health and well-being. Broadly speaking, our health behaviors are typically related to our beliefs about health and what has been modeled to us in our communities. If our thoughts about health are not consistent with what is best for our overall well-being, then our health behaviors will not reflect health activities.
Conclusion Having a true connection with one ’ s spirituality leads to health behaviors like mindfulness activities (i.e. yoga, meditation, prayers, etc.) that contribute to a healthier lifestyle. One’ s spirituality is expressed in how they live their lives.
The music we listen to, what we read, and the conversations we have with ourselves and those around us, all contribute to how we express our spirituality in everyday life. Spirituality is who we are and it is revealed in all areas of our lives, especially how we choose to show up in this world.
The explanation of how spirituality might have positive effects on health has been linked by social and psychological outcomes (or resources), such as self-esteem, healthy behaviors and lifestyles, and social support, which ultimately lead to better health.
About the Author Crystal Harrell, MS, MPH is a Yale Ph.D. student, certified Academic Success Coach, motivational speaker, and bestselling author of Crystal Clear: A Journey of Self-Discovery (From Public Housing to Ivy League). Her story has impacted students worldwide and created a push for self-awareness and personal development in academia. Learn more about Crystal and her work at www.crystaltharrell.com.
Spirituality
“Culture is the “arts Culture is the arts elevated to a set eof levated to a set of beliefs.” beliefs.” –
Thomas –Wolfe Thomas Wolfe
Habits
“What will the end goal look like once I start this journey? Start with Intention I know this sounds a bit weird and woo woo, but this is a powerful habit to build. Try this when you are starting anything new in your life, from habits to new projects! Ask yourself these questions and answer them truthfully to not only kickstart your journey with a strong mindset but also sustain the process by taking intentional steps without wavering towards a future you wish to create for yourself!
“Why am I doing this?”
“What is the purpose for starting this journey?”
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by Madhurima Sappatti Take mini-breaks! Here’s the deal! We are not GOD. We don’t need to take a break only on Sundays after having created the entire universe in 6 days. Plus if you are a workaholic like I was, you won’t respect your day off and try to get more work done. (I see you) We have the idea of “Making every second count” and “Earning our breaks”. You don’t need to earn your time off! Learn to listen to your body and the signs it sends your way (Read step 1 to know how to do that). A small stretch is nice and good, but if you feel yourself breaking and struggling to get thoughts out and it is causing you stress, you NEED a break. The best way to figure out a pattern is by taking mini breaks! What this means is instead of having to wait for a Day Off, you take mini breaks throughout the day. Sit down, switch on a timer, and take note of how long you can stay focused on your work without getting distracted. Again, stretch just a bit in this scenario. If you find yourself getting distracted but you can still get yourself back to the job at hand, keep the timer running, till the point where you find yourself getting distracted
TIPS TO MAKE BETTER HABITS HABITS TO PREVENT BURNOUT AS A CHANGEMAKER!
Continued... Keep track of the habits you are starting and the intention behind starting them The flexible plan to help you stay accountable to the habit but also leave space for creativity to take over. For example if you would like to include exercise, you can aim to exercise for 5 minutes daily, but you can leave some space open for the type of activity you wish to choose like dancing, swimming, playing a sport, jogging, etc. Also, this doesn’t mean that you don’t take a break on Sunday. Reflect Reflection is key on this journey as it helps you:
4.Witness and document your journey!
3.What part of the habit worked best for you and you can continue on, and what part of the habit didn’t work that well and you can create some sort of tweaks or changes to try to get that part work better for you!
1. 2
Habits
5.Have a specific time where you have to communicate with yourself to work on yourself!
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The entire purpose of this point is to make sure that you can take breaks throughout the day rather than waiting for a day to help you reset!
every minute or so. This time can range from 20 minutes to 90 minutes. After this period of focus, spend anywhere from 5 minutes to 30 minutes doing something that will help you reset your mind like reading your favourite comics, watching an episode of your favourite anime, or spending time petting your dogs! This can look like anything that will keep your mind off of work. This will actually help you stay focused and get your work done quicker and faster without any silly mistakes!
You have had a set habit or lifestyle for a pretty long time that has been programmed into your mind as the perfect routine. Start small and with mini changes that you can sustain over a long period of time!
Love every aspect of yourself! We are beings that have different interests that satisfy us and help us enjoy life! Think of it as different hats that we wear that help us participate in different activities! However, when we do something that we are extremely passionate about and make it into our source of income (for example), then it gets very difficult to remove this hat and wear anything else. This hat soon becomes a part of our personality and starts to run our life. Anything and everything else becomes unimportant or unnecessary.
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The hat starts to create emotions of guilt and worthlessness if we try to do something other than what it is all about. Everything needs to be about the hat… and honestly, we don’t stop it. But like I was saying earlier, we are here to experience life to its fullest in every aspect of the journey. Remember that the hat is just an accessory to your life, not your entire being! Try to find activities that invoke nostalgia and happy memories and do them not as a way to check this activity off a to do list but rather to enjoy your time and have fun! I hope that these steps help you in your journey of preventing burnout and having the freedom to experience your life! While these steps are amazing, don’t rush into it and try everything all at once. Visibility
Once you find that something is working, try to add on a new habit on top of that! Also, remember that these are just a few habits! Give them a try! There are so many more types of activities that exist and some that are the perfect fit for you and your cocktail of triggers!
I have a Pay What You Want coaching session called Aarambh, that you can book here if you would like more help on your burnout or in finding ways that might support you on this journey. Let's go!
TIME” AS A MAMA.
www.selfmasterymagazine.com Parenting 4 SIMPLE WAYS TO FIT IN
As moms, we know that we need more self care than almost anyone else… yet we get the least! How many times have you said to yourself “I just don’t have time for this”, “There’s too much to do”, or maybe your To Do list is so long, taking time out of your day to have a nice bath or go get a massage was never even a thought that crossed your mind! “ME by Breckly Quinney Cheryl McColgan
1.LEAN INTO YOUR SUPPORT SYSTEMS
2. PRIORITIZE TASKS In order to move time around in your schedule so self care is evident, you must prioritize! What chores need to be done for you to have peace of mind? If it’s more than a few simple things, which one takes precedence over anything? Do you need to have swept and vacuumed floors to have peace of mind? Or as long as the dishes are done you don’t mind other messes much? Maybe those things don’t matter as much as the bathrooms being sparkling. Each person has their preferences! Let go of perfection, and choose to get the tasks done ASAP that would otherwise bother you all day long! The idea that our homes all need to be perfectly clean is what keeps us doing chore after chore until we’ve forgotten to eat lunch and it’s suddenly 6 pm.
I’m here to tell you that it is entirely possible to fit in the time you so deserve for yourself, Mama. Whether you find it relaxing to get a facial, meditate, take an epsom salt bath with lavender essential oil (yum!), I’ve got you Here are 4 simple ways to fit self care into your daily and weekly routine! Parenting
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Maybe it seems counterintuitive to you, but I promise the chores will still get done! You don’t have to compromise your own downtime for them. Perhaps you think I’m out of my mind to suggest you not only don’t get things done that you normally would, but you should choose for it to be as such. If you’ve ever had a million items on your ToDo list that didn’t get done, so you added them to tomorrow’s list only to not get them done again and so on and so forth, you know what I’m getting at. The guilt that eats away at you when you don't get something done due to overwhelm is stifling. And frankly, unnecessary to say the least! In Japanese culture there is a practice called Kaizen that tells us to think of the very smallest possible step to take towards a bigger goal. This works so well to lessen the threat of not getting something “done”. The menial daily tasks are never truly finished anyway, so why bother stressing about them? Laundry for example. That is a never ending sentence of washing, drying, folding, picking up, putting away, etc. Laundry is my personal foe of choice. Breaking it up, what’s one thing you can do to take a step towards finishing this task? Maybe it’s just scooping them up and tossing them in the hamper. Bam. Check that one off the list! You get the idea. This not only makes you feel so much better by checking that box, but you may feel inclined and energized to actually do more than if you had overwhelmed yourself with the whole of the task.
This may seem obvious to some, but in a world that over values independence and doing it all yourself, it’s a very underutilized step! As moms, we’re so used to being our kids’ everything; From chef, to play mate, to referee, it’s always you! It’s okay to let go of the idea that you need to be everything and more for your kids. Drop them off, Mama! Hire a babysitter, call up Grandma, get them to the daycare, whatever works for you!
3. SHORTEN THAT TO-DO LIST
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ABOUT THE AUTHOR
Parenting
4. FIND “ME TIME” WITHIN THE TASK AT HAND If you didn’t think I was crazy before, now you might. We all know Mamas are the best at multitasking. So much so it seems we have two pairs of arms sometimes! So why not squeeze in some self care during chores like cooking and cleaning? Specifically ones where you’re mindlessly moving anyway. Consider where your mind wanders as you’re doing dishes or brushing your teeth. What if we could use these moments to be truly present? What if we decided to fill those pockets of time with gratitude? Being grateful for the small, seemingly insignificant things, makes a huge shift within your conscious and subconscious minds. You start considering how without your teeth, your life would look so different! Without your hands, eyes, toes, etc. gratitude would come much less easily. This is where you can find meditation within your tasks. In gratitude. It’s a simple shift that changes the lives of Mamas all the time! So maybe you weren’t able to fit in an hour or so of time for yourself today. If nothing else, the gratitude you can pour into the privilege it is to not only care for children, but a home, a car, perhaps animals, etc. is so beyond beautiful. I know how scary setting this boundary to prioritize self care can be for some parents. The dreaded Mom guilt comes flooding to the surface, intruding every thought. Know that your babies still love you! They deserve a Mama who can spend time filling up her own cup in order to show up more beautifully in their lives! You can’t pour from an empty one, as I’m sure you know!
The more you care for your own needs, the more easily you can care for not only the little humans in your life, but your own relationships with your spouse or other family members. Don’t underestimate the power of being selfish every day! You deserve space to meet your own needs. Your family deserves to see that from you, so they can mirror the same within themselves. We all just want our families to be happy and healthy. It starts with you!
Xoxo, Breckly Breckly Quinney is a certified Integrative Nutrition Health Coach for mamas with littles. She helps moms create space in their minds, hearts, and schedules to prioritize self care so they can show up more wholly and present in their kids’ lives, and find their unique purpose both within and outside of motherhood. Connect with her on Instagram! @gladnessfactory
By Johanna Godinez
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”Meditation is the only intentional, systematic human activity which at bottom is about not trying to improve yourself or get anywhere else, but simply to realize where you already are.” Jon Kabat Zinn There are times in our lives when our circumstances appear to be too much for us to handle. Our minds become harder to focus as we become overwhelmed by the duties we have at hand. As we become overwhelmed with the obstacles we are experiencing, attempting to imagine the outcome of future discussions, imagining unrealistic scenarios, or reliving old memories, it becomes difficult to be present or concentrate fully on the job at hand. When our minds move from one concept to the next, our ability to focus on a task falter, having a significant impact on our ability to efficiently complete them. AND OUR STATE OF MIND
Mindset AUGUST 2022 MEDITATION
Meditation is an ancient practice where we deliberately direct our thoughts, silence our chattering minds and center focus our intentions in finding peace and calm. This may seem tough when we are in a negative or repetitive mind pattern, but like everything, with practice, you may develop this ability to calm yourself so you can start to understand your thought patterns and where they are stemming from
Mindset AUGUST 2022 MEDITATION
“The relaxation response helps decrease metabolism, lowers blood pressure, and improves heart rate, breathing, and brain waves. Tension and tightness seep from the muscles as the body receives a quiet message to relax.”
What is the Purpose of Meditation? Through consistent practice, we may develop the ability to bring our awareness and focus where we desire. Our breath is a great place for our thoughts to anchor to as we begin to practice merely becoming the observer of our thoughts instead of identifying with the thoughts themselves As we gain more awareness of our thoughts, we can start to see their patterns and what triggers them to repeatedly arise. The ultimate goal is to notice our thoughts and the patterns we perceive to gain understanding of whether or not they are serving us. Once we understand our thought patterns, we can question them and then we can decide if we want to keep them or alter them if they are no longer working for this version of ourselves.
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By Johanna Godinez
What is Meditation?
Dr. Herbert Benson AND OUR STATE OF MIND
Practice and repetition are the basic requirements to establishing a foundation to incorporate meditation into our lives. The act of sitting silently in meditation may be challenging at first, so there are various concentration techniques you could apply first, such as candle gazing to practice focusing, nature awareness or breath awareness to learn sit in the moment as it is. As you learn to focus your mind you allow the thoughts to pass through your awareness of them which allows you the tools to start questioning their purpose all together. You can choose to write them down if you wish, however, refrain from engaging in mental conversation with them. If you find yourself still unable to detach from conversing with them, you may choose to repetitively say a phrase or word (called mantra in Sanskrit, the language of Yoga) No matter what method you adopt, you will need practice to develop and deeply incorporate this skill. We accept that it takes practice for us to be able to allow our thoughts to flow without conversation. It is important that we forgive ourselves for falling back to established thought patterns and can simply remind ourselves to come back to just being aware of what’s happening in our mind. As we explore various techniques and discover what works best for us to manage our thoughts, it becomes easier to enter and remain in a meditative state. The more you practice coming back to the present during your meditations, the easier it becomes to incorporate coming back to what you are doing during your regular day, when thoughts threaten to either take you away from the present moment or cause some sort of energetic or emotional shift based on their content.
MEDITATION AND OUR STATE OF MIND
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Benefits of Meditation Having the ability to focus our thoughts on a task serves us greatly as we move towards creating any type of change in our lives. When we take the time to find space and lessen the disturbances of our thoughts, we may relax the tense state of our bodies that is caused by the mental stress of never ending mind chatter. Therefore, meditation also increases the state of harmony between our bodies, our spirit and our minds. Once this cycle begins, this harmony creates less mental chatter in our brains, which allows more space to relax your body and come back to any project or task with a relaxed body and a fresher mind.
By Johanna Godinez
Incorporating Meditation Like with any other habit, it will take time to develop the ability to focus our thoughts.
Mindset AUGUST 2022
If you have time to breathe Iyou f you have time to breathe you have time to meditate. hYou ave time to meditate. You breathe when you walk. bYou reathe when you walk. You breathe when you stand. bYou reathe when you stand. You breathe when you lie bdown. reathe when you lie down. – Ajahn –Amaro Ajahn Amaro
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Meditation also opens the door to manifesting your deepest desires. As manifestation happens when you have a clear vision of what you desire and the ability to hold that vision in your mind to ask the universe to allow you to receive what you want. The main benefit on meditation develops as you become dedicated into the practice and ultimately fulfill the age old philosophy of “Know Thyself”
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Burnout in its essentiality is “Stress that hasn’t been managed properly for a long duration of time!”
Now the truth is, as we are human beings, we are constantly surrounded by and affected by different kinds of stress at different points of life. Plus there is never just one type of stress affecting us at any point in time because everything in our lives is often connected and one stress point can lead to more types of stress in other areas of our life.
As a Freedom Soul Coach, I am often asked to share my tips on preventing Burnout, and I always begin by explaining that no matter what we do, Burnout is not 100% preventable! And every time I say this, people think that I am basically destroying my career within seconds, but it is my job to share the truth about Burnout and create as much awareness as possible, even if the future of it seems bleak. The reality, however, is not so dark, if you understand the true essence of Burnout. So hang on and don’t jump away just yet.
Work
IS BURNOUT PREVENTABLE?
by Madhurima Sappatti
“Being “overwhelmed Being overwhelmed means that your life mor eans that your life or work is overpowering wyou. ork is overpowering you. Regain control Rby egain control by clarifying your cintentions, larifying your intentions, setting srealistic etting realistic expectations, and efocusing xpectations, and focusing on your next ostep.” n your next step.” — Daphne —Michaels Daphne Michaels
1.Communicate with yourself.
This is where the habits come into play, which can help you get rid of stress, release happy hormones and help you relax your body! Warning: These habits are not the final solution! They are just a way for you to practice well being and take proactive steps towards healing yourself. This is just a part of the process! Now, without further ado, let’s get into it!
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In this journey of preventing and conquering burnout, Self Awareness is a tool that can change the game for you, because with enough self knowledge you will know when stress is getting too hard to handle and could possibly be leading you towards the zone of burnout. This entire process can be kickstarted by having a conversation with ourselves. We are so used to brushing aside our inner voice as irrelevant and/or naive that we forget that all our inner voice speaks is truth. There is no fluff, no sweet intentions or hidden meanings behind it. It is time we apologize to our inner self and take a listen to what it has to say! Feeling awkward? A great way to start would be by taking yourself out on a date. Pick a time and a day, choose a favourite activity that you truly enjoy and then go out on a date. And when you do, please don’t dive right into the hard hitting questions of what life means and what our role in this big universe is. Start small, start by interacting with yourself, ask them about how they have been, what they like to do (You might receive answers that involve things you enjoyed doing when you were young), and what they would like to do on their next date. Start by communicating with yourself till you build a relationship deep enough to start having conversations around burnout and stress management!
Work For example, if you missed your bus, you are stressed out about not reaching your office on time, which can lead to the stress of how your boss might respond and what your co workers might think of you, which can lead to stress of an important meeting that you have to participate in and add to the nervousness that has existed for a while, which can lead to you snapping at someone and feeling guilty, angry and hurt about it! This is something I like to call the cocktail of triggers, where you drink this cocktail that is made perfectly just for you, for long enough, it can lead to stress! Imagine being under this level of stress or more every single day, without having any processes in place to help you get rid of all the chemicals swirling inside of you and turning you into a walking stew of stress!
ABOUT THE AUTHOR Madhurima Sappatti is a Freedom Soul Coach and she is amazing!! As a Freedom Soul Coach, her aim is to guide changemakers, especially coaches, to get Freedom from Burnout and Limiting Beliefs, and go from being Burnt Out to Thriving.
I know it seems stupid, especially when a Freedom coach talks about limiting yourself, but it is inside your greatest limitations that you flourish the most! Here’s what I mean. If you don’t have good boundaries, you will be running from one place to another, trying to please everyone, and not having enough restrictions for you to experience your version of freedom. We are here to experience every moment to its greatest (yes, the good and the bad ones) in this journey called life. Sorry, I know that was a bit philosophical but it's the truth. However, in today’s digital world where everything mixes together, we don’t have the time to appreciate the moments we experience. Her journey began when she experienced a life changing burnout at the end of 2019 while working in a toxic environment without knowing what she was going through. It was only after 1.5 years that she realized what she went through was Burnout, and it took an additional 6 months to actually get out of it. Her intention as a coach is to help others get through Burnout without having to go through 2 years of Trial and Error. She aims to achieve this by creating a sustainable space that will help changemakers grow, expand, and experience Freedom. Madhurima brings together inner work and spirituality to enable as many people as possible to follow their dreams and passions without Burnout holding them back!
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By creating better boundaries, we create time blocks that help us stay focused and experience our work, our personal lives, and our personal time separately! When you create strict boundaries around your time, you will also be able to say no when you feel like the lines are being blurred by someone else or even you, in a moment of weakness. These are some amazing habits to kick-start the journey of preventing Burnout and sustaining them.
Boundaries are so important on this journey!
Work 2.Create Better Boundaries
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BY: SANIA HEATH Five Tips On How To Become A Tough Cookie
Life is like a merry go round. Situations get rough, tough and ugly at least once for all of us. Troubles, challenges, adversities or whichever you call it, we face them. Overcoming them with the grit and edge you've formed makes it possible to bounce back big. Separate your emotions and keep a positive mindset
selfmasterymagazine.com Mindset
When life goes sideways and spirals downwards, that regress can turn us into Negative Nancy or Complaining Carl. There's a burst of emotions that seem not to dissipate quickly enough. Grab a pen and some paper. Draw a table. At the top you write down your current challenge(s). In the left column, all your negative emotions and in the right column reasons to feel positive. This is a good tactic especially if you fire up like Goku and suddenly sink into Eeyore state when luck strikes out. If you can't immediately find a positive thought, try listing things you are grateful for. A positive mindset is a willpower to bounce back.
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EMBRACE CHALLENGES
Mindset
Embrace your challenges Trouble doesn't give a forecast. So when yours does arrive, why not look it in the eyes with your best smile? Life challenges and circumstances put our courage, strength, and resilience to the test. Whether it's a slap in the face, stab in the back, blow to the knee, you will get knocked down. The next question to ask yourself, "What am I made of?" Once you've discovered and named these, it's time to refine your outcome. Don't lose sight of your long term goals
Pivoting is not only for business owners, banks and world economies. At some point on our journey through life, we're forced to change gears, switch lanes or take a whole new route. The golden rule is to keep your long term goals in sight. Anything is possible and everything is "figureoutable", thanks Marie Forleo. Don't give up the fight! "You're gonna hear me roar…" These Katy Perry are true about the champion within you. Next time you feel like throwing in the towel, just remember to give your biggest roar fight back - you will overcome. Take notes. Learn from your failures. If there's one superior fact about life, it's filled with lessons. All your challenges, setbacks, mistakes or failures have something to teach you. Ask yourself questions : "What can I do better next time?" , "How can I improve my approach?" , "How can I better observe situations to foresee a downfall?" and more. Once you tune in and start to take notes, you can focus on how to solve your problems. The aim here is to bounce back and win. In the words of Malcolm X, "There's no better teacher than adversity. Every defeat, every heartbreak, every loss contains its own seed, its own lesson on how to improve your person next time."
Being a tough cookie means that you are strong, tenacious and determined. When circumstances try to knock you off your feet, give yourself and hug and remain positive as you fight back. This journey is not a race, but partially a test of your endurance.
About The Author Sania Heath is a Caribbean native who wears many hats She’s a 'teacherpreneur' and Language Nutrition Coach. She supports families raising bilingual children by exploring Spanish language and cultures around the world. Women's personal development is a secondary passion that she enjoys sharing as a gift. Connect at: https://m.facebook.com/preschoolpursuits
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