Middle School Parent Resource Night: September 21, 2023

MIDDLE SCHOOL PARENT RESOURCE NIGHT

September 21, 2023

COUNSELING DEPARTMENT

Ashley Giljum (Grades 6-8)

Stephanie Sparks (Grade 9)

Karen Verstraete, Mary Bodlovich, Chrissy Boyce (Grades 10-12)

Meghan Swaller (Administrative Assistant)

“Middle School years are a time of rapid growth; the only other time in a child’s life when they changed this rapidly was between birth and age

- Phyllis L. Fagell, LCPC

FUNDAMENTAL QUESTIONS:

1. Who am I?

2. Am I normal?

3. Do I fit in?

GUIDING PRINCIPALS OF PARENT-SCHOOL INTERACTIONS:

HIGHLIGHTS TO KEEP IN MIND

# 2 – Allow your child to advocate for herself.

# 4 – Accept that real growth often results from short-term disappointment.

# 5 – Keep things in perspective.

MS COUNSELING PROGRAM

MS Program

(Early

ADDITIONAL PROGRAMS

MS CAMP, ORIENTATION AND TRANSITION MEETINGS WITH NEW STUDENTS

STUDY SKILLS CLASS (6TH – 1ST QUARTER)

MS WELLNESS CLUB

STUDY SKILLS CLUB (7TH & NEW 8TH)

PEER-2-PEER TUTORING

COTILLION BY ETIQUETTE ST. LOUIS (8TH)

CHADS “SOS: SIGNS OF SUICIDE” PRESENTATION –

SEPT 27 (PARENTS) AND OCT 17/19 (STUDENTS)

ROSALIND WISEMAN PRESENTATIONS – OCT 25 & 26

MS PARENT SPEAKER NIGHT (FEB/MARCH – TBD)

ACADEMICS

OUR GOALS IN MS:

MIDDLE SCHOOL STUDENTS HAVE AN OVEREMOTIONAL BRAIN WITH AN UNDERDEVELOPED PREFRONTAL CORTEX.

(Dr. Lori Desautels)

DEVELOPMENT MILESTONES

Social and Emotional Impacts of Covid (2nd – 4th Grades)

HOMEWORK EXPECTATIONS

ON AVERAGE, 1.5 - 2 HOURS PER NIGHT

• Will vary based on schedule and which classes drop

• Increases each year

• Advisory

• Enrichment

VIZ PORTAL & ONENOTE

• Class information; homework, quiz and test dates (test calendar)

• Viz calendar, news & resources

VIZ PLANNER

• Daily schedule

• Record homework

• Calendars

• MS Information

LAPTOP

Guidelines for Use at Home

- When? Where? How Long? - Consequences

Monitoring

- Use in a visible place

- No

minimizing

- Software

THINGS TO NOTE:

COMMUNICATION DURING THE SCHOOL DAY

• How to handle communication during the school day with your student?

LEAVING EARLY & SKIPPING EVENTS

• Unless a student must leave, encourage them to stay and participate.

EMERGENCY VS. NONEMERGENCY SITUATIONS

• What constitutes an emergency for missing class vs scheduling an appointment at school?

SOCIAL LIFE & EMOTIONAL WELL-BEING

CHALLENGES:

Fitting In & Belonging Making New Friends

Changing Friendships

Cliques vs. Friend Groups

Social Media & Technology

CHALLENGES:

Body Image

Sexuality, Dating, & Relationships

Mixers & Parties

Exposure to alcohol, drugs & vaping

Stress & Anxiety

Learning Healthy Coping Strategies

COMMUNICATION

- Warmth & compassion

- Listen closely

- Share & discuss family values

- Set clear expectations

PERSONAL RESPONSIBILITY

- Handle own problems

- Reserve judgment

- Learn through challenges & failures

DEALING WITH CHALLENGES

STRUCTURE & ROUTINE

- Sleep – 8 to 10 hours per night for MS

- Meals – many do not eat breakfast

- Physical activity

- Time & place for homework

- Help around the house – chores and responsibilities at home and in community

- Time with friends and leisure (down) time

SETTING LIMITS

- Consistency

- Be willing to be unpopular; not her friend

- Limit media that might increase anxiety or fears

- Create a family media plan

- Monitor TV and Social Media usage – limit use, especially at bedtime (avoid laptops and phones in bedroom overnight)

HEALTHY SUPPORT

- Circle of control

- “Name it to tame it”

- Change how adults talk about stress and anxiety

- Weightlifting analogy

DEALING WITH CHALLENGES STAY CONNECTED AT SCHOOL

- Identify available resources

- Follow all school communications

- Connect with faculty, advisor, counselor, and principal

- Outside referrals when necessary

BE AWARE OF…

… RELATIONSHIPS

• Know your daughter’s friends and their parents

• Talk to other parents

• Notice changes

… TECHNOLOGY

• Music

• Movies/TV/Netflix

• YouTube

• Social Media

• Distractions/ Safety

FOR EXAMPLE…

THINGS TO KNOWOVERHEARD AROUND VIZ!

Fire Vibing

Sus Cringe

Bae

Snatched

Low Key Mid

Basic

Slaps

Bruh Tea

Gucci

Bussin’ Yeet

Rizz

Drip

Simp

APPS PARENTS SHOULD KNOW

https://www.bark.us/blog/dangerous-apps-kids/ and https://www.foxla.com/news/pasco-sheriffs-office-names-15-apps-parents-should-look-out-foron-their-kids-devices

2023 EMOJI MEANINGS

1. �� — Used to express annoyance about something

2. �� — Used when getting caught in a mistake or when feeling like a fraud

3. �� — Indicates being “ghosted” (dumped with no explanation)

4. �� — Symbolizes a lie, which could also be called a “cap”

5. �� — A response that means, “It is what it is”

6. �� — Used when sending or receiving nudes

7. �� — A stamp of approval; “I agree”

8. �� — Used to refer to sexual activity

9. �� — Emoji slang for Marijuana/weed

And more…

https://www.bark.us/blog/emojislang-guide/

MONITORING AND SUPPORT WITH TECHNOLOGY

Technology Contract and Home Rules – from school and parents

Bark App

Facebook Group – “Parenting in a Tech World”

Circle Common Sense Media

inform Viz if using)

WITH STUDIES SHOWING THAT 60-70% OF AMERICAN TEENS LIVE WITH A BORDERLINE TO SEVERE SLEEP DEBT, WE NEED TO KNOW HOW GOING WITHOUT THEIR RECOMMENDED (OPTIMAL) 9 HOURS A NIGHT AFFECTS THEM. SLEEP DEPRIVATION PUTS TEENAGERS IN A KIND OF PERPETUAL CLOUD OR HAZE…

- Child Mind Institute, 2023

HOW MUCH SLEEP IS NEEDED?

(National Sleep Foundation -

https://www.sleepfoundation.org/how-sleep-works/how-much-sleep-do-we-really-need)

SURVEY RESULTS

WHAT THE MIDDLE SCHOOLERS WANT YOU TO KNOW –ABOUT LIFE AS A MIDDLE SCHOOLER

MUSIC

6TH GRADE (45 OUT OF 46 RESPONDED)

Taylor Swift

Morgan Wallen

Olivia Rodrigo

TV SHOWS

Outer Banks

Summer I Turned

Pretty

Gilmore Girls

Dance Moms

High School

Musical Series

WEBSITE & SOCIAL MEDIA

YouTube

Shopping Sites

Run 3 (game)

Instagram

TikTok

Snapchat

WhatsApp Discord

MUSIC

7TH GRADE

(58 OUT OF 64 RESPONDED)

Taylor Swift

Zach Bryan

SZA

Morgan Wallen

Nicki Minaj

TV SHOWS

Summer I Turned

Pretty

Gilmore Girls

Dance Moms

Outer Banks

Riverdale

WEBSITE & SOCIAL MEDIA

YouTube Discord

Games/Roblox Be Real

Shopping CapCut

Snapchat

WhatsApp

TikTok

Pinterest

Instagram

Omegle

MUSIC

8TH GRADE

(43 OUT OF 51 RESPONDED)

Taylor Swift

Zach Bryan

Olivia Rodrigo

Morgan Wallen

Jonas Brother

Billie Eilish

TV SHOWS

Summer I Turned Pretty

Never Have I Ever

South Park

Stranger Things

Dance Moms

Only Murders in the Building

Gilmore Girls

WEBSITE & SOCIAL MEDIA

Shopping

Netflix Omegle

FaceTime

YouTube

CapCut

Wordle

WhatsApp

Snapchat

Instagram

TikTok

DID YOU KNOW? SURVEY RESULTS

• Time on phones

• Cyberbullying

• Average Sleep Amounts

• Breakfast

• Balance between activities, schoolwork, and time to relax

• Source of stress and pressure

PARENT PERSPECTIVE (SURVEY RESULTS)

Cell

Phones

Parent Education

* Be gentle with everyone – especially yourself

* Take time for self care

* Help your daughter develop a self-care toolkit –you can create one too!

* Focus on safety and attachment – spend time strengthening connections

* Adjust expectations and practice radical self acceptance – no one can do it all!

* Find humor, focus on what you can control and look for opportunities to be grateful

* Remind yourself (& family) this is temporary

* Reach out for help – who is in your village?

RESOURCES

BOOKS REFERENCED & RECOMMENDED

Technology Resources:

https://www.bark.us/blog/dangerous-apps-kids/

https://www.foxla.com/news/pasco-sheriffs-office-names-15-apps-parents-should-look-o ut-for-on-their-kids-devices

https://www.missingkids.org/netsmartz/home

https://www.healthychildren.org/English/family-life/Media/Pages/How-to-Make-a-Family -Media-Use-Plan.aspx

www.safekids.com

https://www.commonsensemedia.org/

2023 Teen Slang Meanings Every Parent Should Know | Bark

Sleep Resources:

https://www.sleepfoundation.org/how-sleep-works/how-much-sleep-do-we-really-need When Teens Don't Get Enough Sleep | Sleep Deprivation Effects | Child Mind Institute

Additional Resources:

Breakfast at home may prevent psychosocial health issues among youth (medicalnewst oday.com)

https://revelationsineducation.com/

https://www.crslearn.org/

https://www.edweek.org/leadership/educators-see-gaps-in-kids-emotional-growth-dueto-pandemic/2022/02

https://www.understood.org/en/articles/developmental-milestones-for-typical-second-a nd-third-graders#social_and_emotional_milestones

http://www.susanfee.com/