Supplement to Jewish News June 27, 2016
Se n ior L i v i ng Published 22 times a year by United Jewish Federation of Tidewater.
Judith L. RosenbLatt, P.L.L.C. attoRney & CounseLLoR at Law
Reba and Sam Sandler Family Campus of the Tidewater Jewish Community 5000 Corporate Woods Drive, Suite 200 Virginia Beach, Virginia 23462-4370 voice 757.965.6100 • fax 757.965.6102 email firstname.lastname@example.org
Have you heard about the elderly ladies in Florida who had their
• Family Law • Divorce • Property Settlement • Child Custody • Estate Administration • Guardian ad Litem for Incapacitated Adults
mahjong game stopped by police for illegally gambling? Sounds
Terri Denison, Editor Germaine Clair, Art Director Hal Sacks, Book Review Editor Sandy Goldberg, Account Executive Mark Hecht, Account Executive Marilyn Cerase, Subscription Manager Reba Karp, Editor Emeritus Sherri Wisoff, Proofreader
ridiculous, but true! The piece about these women is on page 20. Our Senior Living section offers articles that run the gamut, from the silly about the women in Florida, to the dismal about some seniors in
Jay Klebanoff, President Alvin Wall, Treasurer Stephanie Calliott, Secretary Harry Graber, Executive Vice-President www.jewishVA.org
Israel who are forced to go without necessities because of income. And that pretty much sums up being a
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senior in 2016…there is no norm,
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no standard lens to view the senior
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status. And, so, we offer articles on a range of topics. For instance, on
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Beth Sholom Village and Eastern Subscription: $18 year For subscription or change of address, call 757-965-6128 or email email@example.com.
Virginia Medical School for a study on the effect of music on memory is highlighted. Laine Rutherford’s article about
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seniors at the JCC’s Yiddish Club on page 15 is not only fun, it is informative. Want to join? It’s free!
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Of course, we have others that include tips on talking to aging loved
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14 | Jewish News | June 27, 2016 | jewishnewsva.org
Topic Legal Matters
Deadline July 1
Aug. 15 Guide to Jewish Living July 29
NMLS 144509 Mobile 757-581-8067 Ofce 757-217-3309 firstname.lastname@example.org
Terri Denison Editor
Se n ior L i v i ng
Seniors find naches (joy) and mishpocha (family) at JCC’s Yiddish Club
Laine M Rutherford
We actually had assignments for that one—and some of the things rlene Kessel’s boom box is they came in with were so bad, large and awkward, but it has like ‘you should be pregnant with a CD player in it and the porcupines!’” speakers are loud, so for the past Since Kessel began leading the three months Kessel has shlepped it club’s meetings, attendance has up to the second floor of the Simon grown from about 15-20 seniors to Family JCC. as many as 35, with some traveling The player is integral to the current from Beth Sholom Village, in wheelfocus of discussion for the 30 or so chairs, with their aides. participants of the JCC Seniors’ Yiddish Michele Goldberg, JCC Cultural Club, which meets on the last Thursday Arts director, says seeing the growth of every month. Music, specifically and popularity of the Yiddish Club songs sung in Yiddish by performers is heartwarming and exciting. such as Mandy Patinkin or the Barry “The club provides an outlet Sisters—and the lyrics to the tunes, where our Jewish seniors can conprinted in a handout—are the basis Yiddish Club leader Arlene Kessel, right, nect to their past, where they can of conversation and discussion for the with participants Abbott and Kitty Saks. learn, where they can share their hour, or two, that the club meets. own knowledge, and where they can kibitz and shmooze “Not everyone understands all of the words, but they with their peers.” get the gist of it—and that’s enough for us to talk about,” Kessel allows the club members to set the pace, says Kessel. “Sometimes we’ll sing, or discuss why the determine the discussion topics, and then she plans songs are so sad, and sometimes we’ll even dance.” accordingly. And although she’s an active volunteer with Kessel is the maven (expert) who took over the club Temple Emanuel and the Holocaust Commission, she when former JCC senior director Sherry Lieberman says that coming to the Yiddish Club is the highlight of retired two years ago. her month. “I had been coming to the club at the request of my “We always start with a word, and they tell me what good friend Kitty Saks, and really enjoyed myself,” says they think it means—of course they all know—but rarely Kessel. “When Sherry was leaving, she said ‘I’m so sorry, do they agree,” Kessel says. I don’t want to see this group disband,’ and I didn’t want “The magical thing is that all of these words trigger to either—so I agreed to take over.” memories and adventures and relatives who aren’t around Kessel was a natural to lead the group. A retired anymore. They just light up when they share these stories teacher, she’d taught German for 38 years at Lynnhaven and I learn so much! Middle School in Virginia Beach, and can read and under“I find this experience so humbling, and so rich. We’re stand Spanish and French. She taught herself Yiddish as listening to each other and we’re laughing and we’re smila young child, after listening to her mother speak to her ing. I wonder, if not for this club, who would listen to grandmother on the telephone and wanting to understand them and hear these stories?” what they were saying. The JCC Yiddish Club is free and open to all seniors. “For me, it was a puzzle—trying to detect the words Arlene Kessel, a real mentch (good person), says a and their meanings, and I just picked it up,” she says. familiarity with some Yiddish is helpful, so participants “Yiddish, though, is not just a language, it’s a culture, don’t feel meshugenah (crazy), and won’t be verdreht and so at our meetings we may focus on books, or music, (confused). Have a nosh (snack) beforehand to fuel your or what I’d like to introduce next—food and cooking,” chutzpah (courage) to speak up, and know that it’s okay says Kessel. to kvell (burst with pride), a bissel (a little). “We’ve traded books back and forth—we laughed Call 757-321-2341 or visit www.simonfamilyjcc.org for together as we read Yiddish with Dick and Jane one week— more information. and for a couple of weeks we brought in Yiddish curses.
18 Yiddish words to know …and use today Alter cocker . . . . . . . old fuddy duddy Bubbela . . . . . . . . . . darling Dreck . . . . . . . . . . . . worthless Farblondzhit . . . . . . . confused Fermisht . . . . . . . . . . shaken up Haymish . . . . . . . . . . friendly Macher. . . . . . . . . . . big wig Nebbish . . . . . . . . . . unimportant person Nudnik . . . . . . . . . . . a pest Plotz. . . . . . . . . . . . . to burst Shanda. . . . . . . . . . . a scandal Shlemiel . . . . . . . . . . dimwit Shmata. . . . . . . . . . . a rag, or old dress Shvitz. . . . . . . . . . . . sweat Shmutz. . . . . . . . . . . dirt Shpilkes. . . . . . . . . . . nervous or jumpy Tuches. . . . . . . . . . . rear end Yenta . . . . . . . . . . . . a busybody The YIVO Institute for Jewish Research describes Yiddish as a language that has been spoken by Ashkenazi Jews (Eastern European) and their descendants for 1,000 years. Before World War II, an estimated 11 million of the world’s 18 million Jews understood Yiddish, and a majority used it as their primary language and means of communicating with one another. Between the effects of the Holocaust and assimilation, that number dipped considerably. Far fewer speak the language today. However, it is taught in colleges and universities, many words have been incorporated into popular culture (klutz, bagel, tchotchke) and its essence is prevalent in everything from cooking and music to films and literature. Visit www.yivo.org for a wealth of Yiddish resources.
Yiddish Club meetings Thursday, June 30, 1 pm Room 238, Simon Family JCC Meets the last Thursday of every month
jewishnewsva.org | June 27, 2016 | Senior Living | Jewish News | 15
Hampton Roads Retina Center was
Se n ior L i v i ng
established in 2002, by Jon M. Adleberg, M.D., to provide specialized retinal care
Talk about driving:
for the greater Hampton Roads area. We care for a myriad of diseases that affect the eye. The most common of which are: Diabetic Eye Disease and Age- Related Macular Degeneration. Our offices are equipped with advanced imaging for retinal diseases, including Spectral Domain OCT, ophthalmic ultrasound, and fluorescein and ICG angiography.
plan ahead to help keep seniors independent, safe on the road
new scratch on the bumper or
LetsTalkAboutDriving.com. The pro-
avoiding activities that require
gram offers free resources and tips to
leaving home are often the first signs
help families build a roadmap with their
that families should talk with their aging
senior loved one for limiting or stopping
parents about driving. Unfortunately,
driving when the time is right. These
those conversations do not happen
resources include an interactive Safe
Driving Planner to help families assess
A new survey by Home Instead Inc.,
their senior loved one’s driving habits
franchisor of the Home Instead Senior
and provide tools to help older adults
Care® network of franchise offices
drive safely, consider options for driv-
that provide in-home care services to
ing reduction or cessation, and identify
seniors, found that 95 percent of the
alternative transportation options.
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surveyed seniors have not talked to
“The ability to drive gives seniors the
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their loved ones about driving, though
freedom to do what they want, when
nearly one-third (31 percent) say that a
they want—and we want to respect that
recommendation from family or friends
independence,” says Steve Secondino
that they transition from driving would
of the Home Instead Senior Care office
make them reconsider driving.
serving Norfolk. “Proactively talking
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16 | Jewish News | Senior Living | June 27, 2016 | jewishnewsva.org
“As adults, we don’t hesitate to talk
about driving with seniors allows
to our teenage children about driv-
them to take an active role in deciding
ing, but when we need to address
when and why their driving should be
concerns with our own parents, we
reduced or eliminated, while keeping
drop the ball,” says Elin Schold Davis,
Hampton Roads area families safe on
occupational therapist and project coor-
dinator for the Older Drive Initiative of
Nearly 90 percent of aging adults
the American Occupational Therapy
rely on their cars and driving to stay
Association. “We know that discussing
independent, according to the survey.
driving with aging loved ones reduces
Though many seniors 70 and older are
their discomfort around limiting or
able to drive safely into their later years,
stopping their driving. Often, families
it is critical for families to have a plan
just need to know how to start the
in place before a medical or cognitive
condition makes it no longer safe for
For many seniors, the idea of giving up driving sparks feelings
their senior loved one to get behind the wheel.
of anger, anxiety and loneliness. To
“Physical and cognitive changes,
help families navigate these sen-
such as those caused by Alzheimer’s
sitive conversations about driving
disease, changes in vision or medi-
cessation, the Home Instead Senior
cation usage, can put older adults in
Care network has launched a new
jeopardy on the road,” adds Schold
public education program, Let’s Talk
Davis. “Many drivers can continue to
About Driving , available at www.
drive safely as they get older, but it’s
Se n ior L i v i ng important for families to work with
after an incident occurs behind the
their loved ones to create a roadmap
wheel. This may be a sign their loved
that explores new technologies and
one needs assistance maintaining their
solutions, while planning ahead. The
independence in and outside of the
solution may not be to stop driving
home,” says Laura Bousman, owner of
completely, but could include adding
the Home Instead Senior Care offices
senior-friendly safety features to the car
serving Chesapeake and Virginia
or taking a safety class.”
Beach. “Our hope is that by having
Family caregivers can look for sev-
these discussions and knowing the
eral potential warning signs that their
potential warning signs in advance,
senior may be losing the confidence or
we can help ensure seniors and their
ability to drive, such as unexplained
families stay safe and independent on
dents, trouble turning to see when
backing up, increased agitation while driving, and riding the brake. “We often receive calls from families
Thank You, for Voting Us
To access the Safe Driving Planner, or to view other program resources and tips, visit www.LetsTalkAboutDriving.com.
Ten warning signs that seniors may be unsafe drivers on the road 1. Mysterious dents. If an older adult can’t explain what happened to his or her car, or there are multiple instances of damage, further investigation is needed to understand if there’s been a change in the senior’s driving abilities. 2. Trouble turning to see when backing up. Aging may compromise mobility and impact important movements needed to drive safely. Fortunately, newer vehicles offer back-up cameras and assistive technologies that can help older adults continue to drive safely.
READERS’ CHOICE AWARDS
READERS’ CHOICE AWAR
3. Confusing the gas and brake pedals. Dementia can lead to a senior being confused about how his or her car operates. 4. Increased irritation and agitation when driving. Poor health or chronic pain can trigger increased agitation that may, in turn, lead to poor judgment on the road. 5. Bad calls on left-hand turns. Turning left can be tricky and dangerous for older
READERS’ CHOICE AWARDS
READERS’ CHOICE AWAR
OF 2016 SILVER
OF 2016 SILVER
drivers, and many accidents occur where there is an unprotected left turn (no turning arrow). 6. Parking gone awry. Difficulty parking, including parallel parking, could cause damage to an older adult’s vehicle as well as to those around it. 7. Difficulty staying within the lanes. If you’ve spotted a driver zigzagging along the road, it could be a sign that fatigue or vision problems are making it difficult
READERS’ CHOICE AWARDS
READERS’ CHOICE AWAR
to stay on course. 8. Delayed reaction and response time. Aging slows response times which may create a situation where an older adult may cause an accident or be unable to respond quickly enough to prevent a crash. 9. Driving the wrong speed. Driving too fast or too slow may be indicators that a
The Talbot on Granby OF 2016 6311 Granby Street BRONZE NORFOLK Norfolk, VA 23505
driver’s judgment may be impaired. 10. R iding the brake. Riding the brake could be a sign that a driver no longer has confidence in his or her skills.
jewishnewsva.org | June 27, 2016 | Senior Living | Jewish News | 17
Three agencies with one common purpose:
C aring for Y ou.
Se n ior L i v i ng
Eastern Virginia Medical School partners with Beth Sholom Village for Music and Memory study
Jewish Family Service of Tidewater provides skilled home healthcare, in-home personal care, counseling, and a continuum of social services. Beth Sholom Village offers outstanding short-term rehabilitation, long-term care, and assisted living. Freda H. Gordon Hospice and Palliative Care of Tidewater provides hospice care to meet the physical, emotional and spiritual needs of patients and their families.
JFS Home Health Care
Thousands of Israeli elderly go without food, medicine or heating
JFS Home Health Care
Hospice & Palliative Care
reactions to music. The BSV staff will then give each participant an iPod loaded with music which is familiar to that person. Family members are consulted to determine participants’ favorite music. Based on the subjects’ reactions and mood changes, the need for certain medications may be reduced, and the individual’s quality of life may improve. Once the initial results of the study are analyzed, more residents at Beth Sholom will be eligible to participate in the Music and Memory program. The work at Beth Sholom Village occurs against a universal background of research and very positive results from expanded music therapy programs for individuals with dementia or Alzheimers. Beth Sholom Village seeks volunteers to assist the residents in the Music and Memory program. To volunteer, call 757-420-2512 and ask for Josh Bennett, Recreation Therapy director.
Beth Sholom Village
F R E DA H . G O R D O N
eth Sholom Village, in partnership with Eastern Virginia Medical School, will begin a study with 20 BSV residents using monitoring equipment and headphones to determine the effect of music on the biorhythms and behavior patterns of those with some cognitive impairment. The study aims to investigate how those living with dementia or Alzheimer’s can benefit from music therapy. The study will be led by Hamid R. Okhravi, MD, of EVMS. The group therapy sessions will be facilitated by Becky Watson, a board certified music therapist. Watson has extensive clinical experience in conducting music therapy programs for older adults living with dementia. Volunteers are needed to sit with the residents for several hours each Tuesday, Thursday and Saturday over a six week period. Each participant will be outfitted with a monitor called an Actigraph which will record various
18 | Jewish News | Senior Living | June 27, 2016 | jewishnewsva.org
ERUSALEM ( JTA)—Thousands of elderly Israelis give up food, medicine or heating because they cannot afford to pay for them, according to a survey earlier this year. Some 18 percent of Israeli elderly go without home heating and about 20 percent give up basic goods in order to pay for heating, according to the study by the International Fellowship of Christians and Jews. The survey of a representative
sample of 400 elderly, aged 65 and older, was conducted through the Geocartography Institute. The survey also found that 12 percent of elderly Israelis give up using hot water at least three days a week for financial reasons; 12 percent give up medication or medical care because of financial constraints; and one in seven gives up food for financial reasons. The survey also found that one in seven elderly report feeling lonely on a daily basis.
Se n ior L i v i ng
Stand up to improve health
WE TAKE PRIDE IN EXCEEDING YOUR EXPECTATIONS.
o sit or stand—that is the question that many ponder considering the latest data on how remaining seated during long periods of time can be hazardous to an individual’s health. In fact, studies show that sitting for long periods of the day can lead to being overweight and developing heart mindful about moving and making it a disease, cancer, diabetes, and even pretop priority. mature death. When standing, keep shoulders The body is meant to move throughback and aligned. Use stomach muscles out the day. Two to stay straight. Slightly bend centuries ago when the knees to ease pressure agriculture employon the hips, and use quality ment was 90 percent shoes that offer good support. of the work force, And what shouldn’t one people engaged in When standing, do? Don’t stick that chest out. proper movement Instead, try to keep the chest throughout the grab your hands perpendicular to the ground. day, not to mention Don’t stand in the same posiphysical exercise. lightly behind tion for long periods of time, Spring forward to and don’t wear high heels today, smack dab in you to pull your when standing for long perithe middle of the ods of time. electronic age that shoulders and A weekly strength and keeps people from flexibility program can help moving and using chest up to create the aging body correct and physical traits to get maintain good posture as good posture. This work done. well as a better quality of So what’s the life. Remember, the body will simple act will solution? Make it weaken unless it is taken care a habit to get up of through a consistent struckeep you mindful and move around tured routine. to promote circulaof your posture. tion as well as to —Tom Purcell, fitness and increase energy. membership director at the Don’t spend long Simon Family JCC, has decades periods throughout of personal training and fitness experithe day in the same seated position. ence. He can be reached at TPurcell@ Keep track of steps per day with a SimonFamilyJCC or 757-321-2321. pedometer or a fitness tracking device. Half the battle of the bulge is being
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We Salute Our Veterans.
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www.CommonwealthAL.com jewishnewsva.org | June 27, 2016 | Senior Living | Jewish News | 19
Relax by the Water
Se n ior L i v i ng
Ready for you to enjoy! This all brick home overlooking serene Lake Smith is bright andWishart up-to-date. 1204 Lake $879,000 New roof and windows. Sometimes when you have more time to do Custom neighborhood the things you like, you need more space in convenient to all of which to do them. Hampton Roads.
5113 Crystal Point Drive $539,900
5001 Cypress Point Cir.
he United Jewish Federation of
ago, when the title to the properties
Tidewater fills many roles in the
were transferred to the Federation, with
community—some are fun and quite
the help of several volunteers. The plan
visible, others are more solemn and less
for the transfer was actually hatched in
noticeable, but no less important.
2000. Jewish leaders in Portsmouth had
5113 Crystal Point Drive
Easy Living • First floor condo with no steps to enter • 3 Bedrooms • Golf, tennis, and swimming available.
Janet Frenck, GRI • 757-439-4039
It is in this quieter role that the UJFT
become concerned that the cemeteries
recently began operating in Portsmouth.
would fall into disrepair as the Jewish
Earlier this spring, the organization
population in Portsmouth declined.
took over the maintenance and opera-
That’s when UJFT came to the rescue
tions of the Gomley Chesed and Chevra
and an agreement was reached whereby
T’helim Cemeteries, on Shell Road near
the cemeteries would be maintained into
Frederick Blvd. and George Washington
perpetuity. In addition to these cemeteries, UJFT
Howard Hanna William E Wood 757-439-4039 1321 Laskin Road, CRB, GRI Janet VirginiaFrenck, Beach, VA 23451 email@example.com firstname.lastname@example.org William E. Wood & Associates 1321 Laskin Road • Virginia Beach
Will your money retire before you do? Laurent Abitbol, Agent Registered Representative Bus: 757-416-7500 9 a.m. - 7 p.m. Mon - Thurs 9 a.m. - 5 p.m. Fri 10 a.m. - 2 p.m. Sat
UJFT fulfills caretaker role for Portsmouth’s Jewish cemeteries
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With the financial assistance of the
provides maintenance for two other local
Gomley Chesed Cemetery Fund, which
Jewish burial sites: Workmen’s Circle
is now managed by the Tidewater Jewish
Cemetery and Mikro Kodesh, both in
Foundation, UJFT provides a crew to
take care of the grounds, headstones,
Contributions to help maintain the
fences, and lighting. The organization
Portsmouth cemeteries are welcome.
also assists with reserving spaces and
Call Randy Parrish at 757-965-6104, or
assigning plots in the Jewish burial site.
mail a check, payable to Gomley Chesed
The cemeteries, which date back to
Cemetery Fund, in care of the Tidewater
the late 1800s, were associated with
Jewish Foundation at 5000 Corporate
the Portsmouth synagogues of the same
Woods Dr., Suite 200, Virginia Beach,
names; Chevra T’helim closed in the
1980s and Gomley Chesed held its last
For more information about any of
service in 2014. Gomley Chesed’s ceme-
the cemeteries the UJFT maintains, email
tery committee continued to superintend
Glenn Saucier, email@example.com, or call
the two cemeteries until a few months
Four elderly Jewish ladies busted for weekly mahjong game (JTA)—Four elderly Jewish women playing mahjong in Florida may not sound like a crime—but that’s what was alleged last fall in the city of Altamonte Springs. Lee Delnick, Bernice Diamond, Helen Greenspan and Zelda King—aged 87 to 95—had their weekly game interrupted by police who stopped them from playing in their usual spot, the Escondido Condominium clubhouse, on suspicion that the group was illegally gambling. King told the Heritage Florida Jewish News that a
20 | Jewish News | Senior Living | June 27, 2016 | jewishnewsva.org
“troublemaker” in the building had alerted authorities to their weekly game. The ladies were told by the Escondido property manager to “lay low” for weeks until the issue sorted itself out. “This is ridiculous!” King said. “We haven’t played in the clubhouse for weeks! We have to go to each other’s homes to play, and not everyone lives in Escondido. It is an international game and we are being crucified!” As it turns out, there is no ordinance in Altamonte
Springs against mahjong gambling. The Heritage Florida Jewish News reported that Florida’s gambling laws allow certain “penny-ante games,” or games through which a winner wins $10 or less. The bubbes’ mahjong game, which caps the winner’s earnings at a steep $4, falls within the confines of the law. King told the Heritage Florida Jewish News that the ladies can now laugh about the whole affair at their mahjong games in the condo clubhouse.