September 26, 2011

September 26, 2011 | VOL. XCIII ISS. VII

Gluten intolerant SINCE 1918

RESOURCE GROUPS COORDINATOR RESIGNS AMS steps in to adminster opt-outs, groups see funds frozen for failing to submit budget P3

U U-TURN BISON THE UBYSSEY

ON

U-PASS UBC allows students on financial hold to receive monthly passes

P3

HUNTING UBC wins homecoming game, moves to second place in Canada West.

P6

GREGOR

GETS

ROASTED

P8

PENDULUM

RESTAURANT

TO CLOSE

The Gallery will play host to a scaled-down version of the Pendulum menu as construction begins on the new SUB in December.

P3

2 | Page 2 | 09.26.2011

What’s on 26 MON

This week, may we suggest...

Our Campus

One on one with the people who make UBC

BOREDOM >>

?

Nothing: All day @ Vancouver This isn’t even a joke. There is really nothing happening on Monday.

Please do not panic; go about your day as though it were any other. Send us your events so we don’t have this unfortunate void in the next issue!

27 TUE

BoG >>

29 THU

VIFF >>

Board of Governors meeting: 8:30am–2:15pm @ Arbutus Room, Ponderosa Centre Do you care what happens at UBC? Are you interested in the school’s upper-level politics? Sit in on the BoG meeting to satisfy your curiosity.

28 WED

AMS >>

AMS Council meeting: 6pm @ SUB room 206 Your beloved AMS Council is meeting! If you thrive on petty politics and an over-inflated sense of self importance, AMS Council is for you! And there will be free food.

16 FRI

GEOFF LISTER/THE UBYSSEY

Reverend Roberta Fraser in the sanctuary at St Anselm’s Church in the University Endowment Lands.

Vancouver International Film Festival: 10am @ Empire Granville 7 VIFF is one of the largest film festivals on the continent; more than 350 films will overwhelm your emotions and entertain you. The event runs 16 days—your mom would want you to bring at least one change of underwear.

TECH >> Great Canadian Appathon 2: 5pm @ room TBA at greatcanadianappathon.com Students across the nation will work in teams for 48 hours straight to develop a smartphone app. The winning game will take $25,000 of the $50,000 prize purse. Nerds rejoice, your time has come!

U

Got an event you’d like to see on this page? Send your event and your best pitch to printeditor@ubyssey.ca.

THE UBYSSEY September 26, 2011, Volume XXXIII, Issue VII

EDITORIAL

Coordinating Editor Justin McElroy

coordinating@ubyssey.ca

Managing Editor, Print Jonny Wakefield printeditor@ubyssey.ca

Managing Editor, Web Arshy Mann webeditor@ubyssey.ca

News Editors Kalyeena Makortoff & Micki Cowan news@ubyssey.ca

Art Director Geoff Lister

art@ubyssey.ca

Culture Editor Ginny Monaco

Copy Editor Karina Palmitesta

CONTACT

copy@ubyssey.ca

Business Office: Room 23 Editorial Office: Room 24 Student Union Building 6138 Student Union Blvd Vancouver, BC V6T 1Z1 tel: 604.822.2301 web: www.ubyssey.ca

Video Editor David Marino

video@ubyssey.ca

Web Writer Andrew Bates

abates@ubyssey.ca

webmaster@ubyssey.ca

BUSINESS

Senior Culture Writers Taylor Loren & Will Johnson

Ad Sales Alex Hoopes

business@ubyssey.ca

tloren@ubyssey.ca wjohnson@ubyssey.ca

advertising@ubyssey.ca

Sports Editor Drake Fenton

Andrew Hood, Bryce Warnes, Catherine Guan, David Elop, Jon Chiang, Josh Curran, Will McDonald, Tara Martellaro, Virginie Menard, Scott MacDonald, Mike Dickson

features@ubyssey.ca

Business Office:

604.822.6681 advertising@ubyssey.ca

feedback@ubyssey.ca

ijoel@ubyssey.ca

Webmaster Jeff Blake

Business Manager Fernie Pereira

sports@ubyssey.ca

604.822.1654

Graphics Assistant Indiana Joel

culture@ubyssey.ca

Features Editor Brian Platt

Print Advertising:

STAFF

LEGAL

The Ubyssey is the official student newspaper of the University of British Columbia. It is published every Monday and Thursday by The Ubyssey Publications Society. We are an autonomous, democratically run student organization, and all students are encouraged to participate.

Editorials are chosen and written by the Ubyssey staff. They are the expressed opinion of the staff, and do not necessarily reflect the views of The Ubyssey Publications Society or the University of British Columbia. All editorial content appearing in The Ubyssey is the property of The Ubyssey Publications Society.

Stories, opinions, photographs and artwork contained herein cannot be reproduced without the expressed, written permission of The Ubyssey Publications Society.

The Ubyssey is a founding member of Canadian University Press (CUP) and adheres to CUP’s guiding principles.

Letters to the editor must be under 300 words. Please include your

phone number, student number and signature (not for publication) as well as your year and faculty with all submissions. ID will be checked when submissions are dropped off at the editorial office of The Ubyssey; otherwise verification will be done by phone. The Ubyssey reserves the right to edit submissions for length and clarity. All letters must be received by 12 noon the day before intended publication. Letters received after this point will be published in the following issue unless there is an urgent time restriction or other matter deemed relevant by the Ubyssey staff.

It is agreed by all persons placing display or classified advertising that if the Ubyssey Publications Society fails to publish an advertisement or if an error in the ad occurs the liability of the UPS will not be greater than the price paid for the ad. The UPS shall not be responsible for slight changes or typographical errors that do not lessen the value or the impact of the ad.

UBC’s portable pastor Bryce Warnes Staff Writer

As a UBC undergrad in the 70s, Reverend Roberta Fraser never suspected that faith would play an important role in her life.

“If you had said to me, when I was in my 20s, ‘You’re going to be called to be a priest,’” said Fraser, now UBC’s chaplain, “I would have fallen down on the floor laughing.

“I had grown up in an evangelical, born-again, biblical literalist congregation, and had lost my faith at 16. And basically [I] had no interest in religion at that point in my life.”

Fraser completed her Bachelor of Science in zoology (honours) at UBC. Her honours thesis was concerned with the population ecology of field mice. She described “many, many long hours sitting in dark rooms watching mice interact with each other.”

It was while planning her wedding—Fraser met her husband at UBC—and supporting a friend during her baptism that she found herself drawn towards the church.

She began attending services at Christ Church Cathedral in Vancouver.

“I couldn’t even have articulated, really, why I was going,” she said. “Just this vague sense that there was something missing...that

I needed to do this in some way.”

Years later, she returned to school. It was during this time that she presented a lay sermon in a church. Afterwards, many parishioners approached her, asking if she planned to become a priest. It so happened that the sermon she had just delivered had been on the importance of sharing one’s gifts with others. This, it seemed, was her calling. “’Thanks for the call, God,’” said Fraser, describing her reaction at the time. “‘Call somebody else.’”

It took a while, but eventually she picked up and enrolled at the Vancouver School of Theology— recognizable to students as the stony “castle” behind Gage—for five years. It was during this time that the National Church chose her to visit as an emissary to a partner church in Uganda.

Fraser spent three months travelling the small towns of Uganda, working as an assistant to the local bishop.

“They didn’t realize that they were sending me some place where people don’t speak English,” said Fraser. “I arrived all by myself not knowing what language people were speaking around me, let alone what they were saying.”

Fraser was ordained in 1998 and came to St Anselm’s in 2002. As a university chaplain, she serves the needs of both church parishioners

and students on campus.

Not all members of Fraser’s student ministry attend Sunday services on a regular basis. Some are not members of the Anglican Church. Many prefer taking part in reading or meditation groups, or the fellowship dinner Fraser holds at the church every Sunday at 6pm during the school year.

“The role of a chaplain is to be kind of a portable pastor,” said Fraser. “There’s a chaplain’s office on campus [in Brock Hall], and I hang out there on Tuesdays during lunchtime, so people can drop in and chat, or ask a question, or whatever. And people can phone me.” U

Roberta Fraser Occupation Chaplain Church St Anselm’s Anglican Original Degree Zoology On being available for all students: ”You don’t have to be a member of the congregation. I’m a chaplain for the whole university.”

News

09.26.2011 |

3

Editors: Kalyeena Makortoff & Micki Cowan

RESOURCE GROUPS >>

Resource groups stumble as coordinator resigns, assets frozen Kalyeena Makortoff News Editor

Turmoil struck the AMS resource groups last week, as resource group coordinator Andrea MacDonald resigned on Thursday—one day before the AMS froze their accounts for not having drafted a budget.

When contacted by The Ubyssey, MacDonald refused to comment on her resignation. The Ubyssey also asked for comment from the resource groups on Friday and later received a threatening phone

call from Pride co-chair, Abigail Feresten, urging The Ubyssey not to write the article. However, after multiple attempts to contact Feresten, she apologized.

“Andrea resigned and the resource groups are shuffling around and trying to figure out how to fill those positions to sort ourselves out, and there’s a little bit of dissent going on. But it’s not unmanageable, and I feel like I’m caught in the middle of it,” she said.

The coordinator is responsible for overseeing the administrative

duties of the resource groups, an umbrella of student groups dedicated to fighting oppression and challenging authority through various social causes. The resource groups—which currently consist of Pride, Allies, the Social Justice Centre, Womyn’s Centre, Student Environment Centre and Colour Connected—receive a combined fee of $1.50 per student.

MacDonald was hired in July following a year where the coordinator was an unpaid position, rotated on a monthly basis. After

concerns arose over the effectiveness of the system, the groups opted to reinstate a year-long hired position.

There is currently no word as to when a new resource group coordinator will be hired, though there will be an emergency meeting to discuss the next step this week.

AMS President Jeremy McElroy and VP Administration Mike Silley will both attend.

In the short term, however, the resource groups are still responsible for ensuring that students

U-PASS >>

October U-Passes no longer withheld Andrew Bates Senior Web Writer

Students on financial hold may be able to ride the bus again.

“We’ve worked out an agreement with the province,” said Carole Jolly, director of Transportation Planning at UBC. UBC received permission from the provincial government to allow Enrolment Services to close a loophole that prevented students from receiving a U-Pass if they were on financial hold.

A contract between UBC, the AMS and the province required U-Passes to be pre-paid. According to Jolly, they have given the university the ability to ensure that they’re still in compliance with the contract while allowing passes for students who had been put on financial hold in the current school year.

According to AMS President Jeremy McElroy, UBC’s U-Pass code, which contacts Enrolment Services to ensure they are eligible for the pass, was built to only accommodate students who applied for tuition deferral.

“But apparently, and this is news to me, there are a number of students in the thousands who choose to pay their tuition late in installments or in chunk sums throughout the year and just accept the interest that’s charged,” he said.

The issue came to light after a post by student blogger Erik MacKinnon, and by Wednesday night, Jolly said they were working to allow students to have access to the pass.

McElroy said he knew that students with outstanding fees wouldn’t be able to pick up October passes before the last day to withdraw from classes without paying.

wishing to opt out from the $1.50 resource group fee can do so in the next two weeks. That responsibility was supposed to fall to the coordinator.

McElroy added that they hope to have the resource group budget sorted out by Wednesday’s AMS Council meeting, but that freezing the account in the interim was a necessary step.

“We haven’t recieved a budget as of yet, so we unfortunately have to put a hold on their accounts until we do.” U EATERIES >>

Pendulum food to relocate to Gallery in January

GEOFF LISTER/THE UBYSSEY

Will McDonald Staff Writer

The October U-Pass will no longer be denied to students on financial hold.

GEOFF LISTER/THE UBYSSEY

However, he said he didn’t know that students wouldn’t be able to pick up their pass after the cut-off date for class withdrawal.

“They should get access to the pass. That was the obvious oversight from UBC’s perspective.”

The change was in the U-Pass FAQ, but was not noted in the “five important changes” to the program that were advertised more heavily

by UBC. “Our communication strategy was trying to keep the messages as high-level as possible with the key program changes and then pointing people to the details,” Jolly said.

“That’s what we were relying on the FAQ to do, so we were hoping

that the majority of students would become familiar with the program with the FAQ page.”

McElroy never knew that there would be a problem with needing to pre-pay passes beyond the deadline to add or drop classes. According to Jolly, she didn’t know the issue, which is in the same contract that all institutions were required to sign.

“We had input from all people, it wasn’t just UBC negotiating this contract or just one person,” she said on Thursday. “I’m not knowledgeable enough about how the tuition fee system works, or how many students don’t pay their tuition on time.

There’s tuition deadlines in place for a reason.”

But according to McElroy, UBC moved quickly to deal with it.

“UBC was very sympathetic and responsive to the concerns that we heard from students, and Enrolment Services really did everything they could,” Jolly said on Friday. “We’re pleased with the outcome.”

“I do think that they responded remarkably quick and have been very understanding of students and things,” McElroy said, noting that the author of the U-Pass code was away on maternity leave.

“It’s a bunch of people who aren’t as familiar with the system who were able to go in and make this change rather quickly.” U

$500,000 “genius grant” goes to UBC biologist

HIV testing project coming to UBC Hospital

$1.2 million gift awarded to monitor child development

An evolutionary geneticist from UBC has been awarded a $500,000 grant from the MacArthur Foundation—a prestigious award popularly known as a “genius grant.”

Professor Sarah Otto specializes in creating mathematical models that unwrap the mysteries of ecology and evolution. Her recent research focuses on why some species reproduce sexually and why some carry more than one copy of each gene.

More than 20 of the prestigious grants are awarded by the US nonprofit foundation each year. None of the recipients has ever applied, but are nominated anonymously.

A new pilot project is set to expand HIV/AIDS testing in Vancouver hospitals.

Optional testing will be offered to patients requiring blood work at the UBC Hospital in 2012 until March 2013.

The initiative is part of the provincial Stop HIV/AIDS campaign, a four-year, $48 million program funded by the Ministry of Health.

There are an estimated 3500 people living in BC who are not aware that they are HIV positive, according to the Vancouver Health Authority.

On Monday, UBC announced a $1.2 million gift from the Lawson Foundation to develop a system to monitor differences in child development across Canada. The gift will support a pan-Canadian network of researchers and practitioners, led by UBC’s Human Early Learning Partnership (HELP).

The system will include the implementation of a national Early Development Instrument‚ a tool that HELP has used in BC for the past decade to measure the development of kindergarten children.

Premier rolls out international student plan for province

News briefs

Last week, Premier Christy Clark announced a plan to boost international student enrolment at post-secondary institutions by 50 per cent. Alongside BC, the US, UK, Australia and China are implementing similar initiatives.

“Universities around the world... are doing this,” said UBC VP Research and International, John Hepburn. “It’s a competitive market [and] the premier is signalling that she recognizes that it’s a competitive market and they’re going to take steps to address that.” U

The Pendulum is closing at the end of this term due to construction of the new SUB. However, the Gallery Lounge will be renovated over the winter break to serve some of the Pendulum’s food.

“Losing the Pendulum, we felt, would decrease what the SUB has to offer. And by amalgamating the two restaurants, the Business and Facilities Committee saw an opportunity to not only increase revenues but also mitigate that loss,” said AMS VP Admin Mike Silley.

The Gallery will accommodate a scaled-down version of the Pendulum’s menu, serving some of the Pendulum’s more popular breakfast and lunch items, as well as prepped food—similar to the current salad display case—until 1am.

The renovations are expected to cost $15,000–$20,000, but AMS Food and Beverage manager Nancy Toogood said that combining the Pendulum and the Gallery will benefit both customers and the businesses.

“The Pendulum suffers sometimes. They’re as busy as they can be, but then there’s limited seating so people don’t go because there’s no place to sit down. The Gallery sometimes is a whole big empty space full of empty tables that we could be using for people to be eating. It really seemed to make a lot of sense to put the two of them together,” said Toogood.

Due to the Gallery’s liquor license, its new food will be restricted to those over the age of 19.

“We didn’t want to change the liquor license. And also just from our reports, we saw that the majority of the people going to the Pendulum were 19 plus,” said Silley.

However, Silley said the AMS is considering serving the Pendulum’s food from a window outside Bernoulli’s Bagels to accommodate minors. U

4 | News | 09.26.2011 ELECTIONS>>

RCMP >>

UBC RCMP face staff shortage

GEOFF LISTER/THE UBYSSEY

Andrew Bates Senior Web Writer GEOFF LISTER/THE UBYSSEY

Undergraduate society elections are underway and student campaigns begin as candidates vie for votes.

Arts Undergraduate Society readies for uncontentious elections Scott MacDonald Staff Writer

The annual Arts Undergraduate Society (AUS) fall elections are currently underway, and unlike last September, there are no vacant executive posts up for grabs.

“Last year, three out of six executive positions were up for by-election in the fall,” said AUS President Justin Yang. These were President, VP Finance and VP Internal.

“So my sentiment was that it was nice to see the AUS with a measure of stability this year.”

The positions up for election this fall are three AMS representatives,

a general officer, two first-year representatives and one representative for each of second, third and fourthyear students.

While there are many candidates running for the first-year representative and AMS representative positions, competition for the other slots is much less tight.

Tierney Milne and Robert Larson are in contention for the role of general officer, Montana Hunter is the only candidate running for fourthyear representative and there is currently nobody in the running for third-year representative.

Voting opens September 26 and officially concludes on September

30. Voting takes place entirely online and can be completed by logging into the Student Service Centre, clicking on the Webvote link and choosing from the list of AUS representatives.

Officials are hoping to generate more voter interest than has been present in past elections.

“As for voter turnout, it has never been very high. In fact, it has been very low…around five per cent,” said Tina Mash, AUS VP Internal.

Potential candidates will be attending free hot chocolate sessions at Totem Park on September 26 and Place Vanier on September 28. The election results party is September 30. U

UBC’s RCMP detachment has been facing staff shortages, resulting in decreased office hours and what’s said to be a temporary operational freeze of a community advisory committee.

“Staffing issues have taken up more of my time than I’ve anticipated, but I’m working on resolving those [issues],” said Kevin Jones, who replaced Kevin Kenna as head of the UBC detachment in June.

In order to solve the problem, Jones said, he’s had to reach into other jurisdictions. “I have casual employees that I’ve brought in from other detachments, but they have different jobs elsewhere.”

One casualty in the staff shortages has been the RCMP Community Consultative Committee, which was started by Kenna and has not yet been revived under Jones.

The committee brought together representatives from the AMS, the Greater Vancouver Districts Parks, UBC, the University Neighbourhoods Association (UNA), the University Endowment Lands and the UBC RCMP. “It was a really good committee to hear the common concerns that different stakeholders have on campus around policing issues,” said Jan Fialkowski, executive director of the UNA. At their September meeting, the UNA asked when the committee might return, in order to discuss a DJ concert that took place at Thunderbird Arena in June. The

event was not licensed but police reports show there were both drug and liquor confiscations. The UNA has voiced concerns about hosting large concerts on campus that might result in disturbances to nearby residents.

Jones said the committee has not been disbanded.

“When I took over the detachment here, there was a lot of things I needed to get caught up on, and that is one of the things that fell off my plate,” he said. “I’ve had some phone calls from folks involved in that committee, who are very interested in getting that reinstated, and I’ve let them know that it is my plan to do that before the end of the year.”

The staff issues have also affected applications for special occasion liquor licenses, as the RCMP office is currently only open two hours a day, three days a week. “If on any given day I have the staff here that maybe I wasn’t anticipating, we’ll open the door earlier, but that’ll be hit and miss. Those hours will change as time goes on.”

Still, stakeholders say they are happy with relations after the first month of the semester.

“Communication with the RCMP has been good, in this transitionary process there has been very good communication with me,” said AMS VP Academic Matt Parson, who has only met Jones briefly, but has been in contact with an RCMP operations manager.

“I’m sure he’ll do a great job.” U

TUITION >>

Average tuition raised 8% over two years

Tannara Yelland CUP Prairies & Northern Bureau Chief

SASKATOON (CUP)—As universities try to balance their budgets in the face of a sluggish economy, Canadian university students have seen their tuition go up by eight per cent in the last two years.

A four per cent increase for the 2010–11 year was followed by another 4.3 per cent hike this year, according to recent Statistics Canada study. The Canadian average for undergraduate tuition is now $5366.

Ontario students, who pay $6640 on average, pay the highest tuition in the country while Quebec undergrads enjoy the lowest tuition in the nation, paying an average of $2519. Students in Newfoundland and Labrador, where tuition fees have been frozen since 2003–04, are paying an average of $2649.

In Alberta, tuition is nominally capped to the Consumer Price Index (CPI), meaning it increased

by about two per cent for the 2011–12 year. Average fees for fulltime undergrads in that province sit at $5662.

“However, that number is misleading,” said University of Alberta Students’ Union VP External Farid Iskandar. “Alberta has the highest mandatory non-instructional fees levied on students in the country: they’re $1399.”

The national average for compulsory fees went up 5.5 per cent for undergrads. Graduate students in Nova Scotia were the only students in the nation to see a decline in compulsory fees; they went down by 7.5 per cent.

While Canadian undergrads are paying more each year, they are still significantly better off than either their international student counterparts or graduate students.

International students, who represent a rapidly growing portion of the student population, pay an average of $17,571 in tuition—up 9.5 per cent from two years ago.

09.26.2011 | News | 5

New Aquatic Centre for Gage South Open house presents MacInnes Field as best location for new centre Tanner Bokor & Micki Cowan Contributor & News Editor

As contention surrounding development in Gage South continues, MacInnes Field has been presented as one of the most viable options for a new Aquatic Centre.

The location of such a large facility, which is proposed to house two indoor pools and a children’s pool, is the most contested issue for the $37 million venture.

“We’re not super happy, but we do recognize that are very few places on campus it could go,” said AMS President Jeremy McElroy, regarding the proposed site of MacInnes Field.

McElroy’s concern was primarily the loss of green student space.

Building the centre on MacInnes Field would take away one of the largest green spaces available on campus for community use, and would heavily affect future development options for Gage South, he said.

One possibility is to have new green space created on the site of the old Aquatic Centre after it is demolished. In the meantime, intramurals, kids’ camps, Block Party and the Welcome Back BBQ, which MacInnes Field is used for, may be on hold until a suitable space is created.

“Welcome Back BBQ could possibly be accomodated at the West Plaza after the new SUB is built, but Block Party is significantly bigger, and wouldn’t be able to be

Plans for the new Aquatic Centre on MacInnes Field, as pictured at the September 20 open house.

accommodated in its current size and capacity elsewhere,” he said.

McElroy said the AMS had advocated for a different location that would be positioned in an L-shape, wrapped around the south and east sides of the Student Recreation Centre (SRC).

“We had advocated for the wrap around because it would put the

aquatic centre very close to the SRC and very close to the SUB, yet still maintain a large amount of green space on MacInnes Field.

We’re a little disappointed that idea was not considered as fully and not brought to the public,” he said.

One of the reasons given by Campus and Community Planning

GEOFF LISTER PHOTO/THE UBYSSEY

for building on MacInnes Field was that it would cause less disruption of services.

However, wait times during demolition and reconstruction would make site replacement unfeasible for community members and groups like the UBC Water Polo Club.

James Baylis, president of the

UBC Water Polo Club, said a few years without Aquatic Centre access would be less than desirable.

“I feel there are a lot of clubs and rental groups that use the pool. For us, if we didn’t have use of the pool, we would probably be out of business for a couple of years,” said Baylis.

“It’d be bad for us as a club and bad for the pool as well.”

However, Baylis agreed that a new facility is a good idea.

“From what I’ve seen...the building has a lot of maintenance problems, heaters break, pumps break, right now there’s only one power outlet on the entire deck that has electricity,” he said.

“I think it’s quite necessary given the problems they’ve been having with the showers and steam rooms. The showers are literally in bits and pieces now.”

In 2009, a study was performed by an architecture firm to determine if the current building could be renovated. The determination was that the expenses outweighed the benefits of building a new structure, listing the capital cost of renewal as 20-25 per cent more expensive than building anew.

The Gage South and Environs planning process is expected to conclude in early 2012, with a formal public hearing to be held soon after with the results of their decision.

Public consultations will take place in late October/early November 2011. U

Pricey real estate: the most expensive buildings at UBC Tanner Bokor Contributor

UBC’s Point Grey campus houses over 250 different buildings, ranging from the brick-clad undergraduate residences at Place Vanier to the timber box-like huts along West Mall to the too-confusing-to-navigate Biological Science Centre—and everything in between.

With a mixture of original structures from the early 20th century such as the recently renovated IKB, and modern construction like the Koerner Library, UBC stands as having one of the most eco-friendly and architecturally diverse campuses in Canada.

However, beauty, functionality and eco-friendliness doesn’t come cheap. The most expensive buildings on campus are a testament to UBC’s recent expansion initiatives; they are all recently completed or in current construction.

An honourable mention in fifth place goes to UBC Vancouver District Energy System ($84.8 million). If you’ve ever taken a shower in rez or walked into a heated building on a wintry Vancouver day, you’ve benefited from UBC’s campus-wide steam-driven energy system.

This year the Board of Governors approved an estimated $84.8 million upgrade project to switch from steam to hot water energy, reducing energy demand on campus by 24 per cent and lowering emissions by 22 per cent. The plan, with construction already in process, calls for connecting all buildings on campus together to the Bioenergy plant on Lower Mall.

We’ll soon be able to take a shower from the largest and possibly most environmentally friendly hot water system in North America.

4

New SUB ($103.26 million)

The current SUB isn’t able to handle 45,000 students in its current form. As a result, the AMS and UBC are nearing the construction phase of a brand-new 255,000 square foot SUB in the area south of the current SUB. The project, expected to be open in 2014, will house AMS administration, meeting areas, retail food outlets, an auditorium and an art gallery.

Following the lead of many other UBC buildings, the new SUB is expected to attain LEED Platinum status. With substantial funding for the project coming from student fees (about $78.26 million in total), the university has also dedicated $25 million to the project and will be funding ongoing non-commercial costs. Rumour has it there will even be a spiral slide to get you from level to level. Blue Chip Cookies and a spiral slide: what more can you ask for?

3

2

Pharmaceutical students rejoice! Opening in 2012, the new Pharmaceutical Sciences and Centre for Drug Research and Development building represents a giant infrastructure investment.

With an $86.40 million grant given to the university from the provincial government and additional funding coming from the UBC endowment fund and fundraising, the building will allow the Faculty of Pharmaceutical Sciences to increase its size from 152 open undergraduate seats to a total of 288 seats, 72 of which will be open to first-year students. This will effectively double the amount of available graduate student slots. The building, expected to attain LEED Gold status, will be a prime asset in addressing the lack of trained pharmacists in BC, which must be music to the Ministry of Health’s ears.

It’s student housing! It’s classroom space! Actually, it’s all of that. The planned Ponderosa Housing Hub, or the Ponderosa Commons, is part of UBC’s plan to help create a more vibrant and active student centre.

Intended to open in fall 2013, Ponderosa Commons will be situated at University Boulevard and West Mall, featuring studio-like housing units and adding 1,116 student beds, according to UBC Student Housing and Hospitality Services.

The plan also calls for classroom space for both the Faculty of Arts and Faculty of Education.

It also features a space for commuter students in the form of a possibly member-only collegium, designed to increase inter-faculty interactions and create an area for commuter students to identify with. Like much of the other new construction on campus, the Hub will be LEED Gold certified.

Pharmaceutical Sciences and Centre for Drug Research and Development ($155.23 million)

Ponderosa Housing Hub ($167.43 million)

1

Life Sciences Centre ($197.12 million)

The grand-daddy of all buildings on campus, this 556,599 square foot behemoth was initiated in 2001 to adhere to the BC Provincial government’s mandate to double the amount of Medicine students on campus in order to tackle the shortage of specialists and generalists in the province. A shared space between the Faculties of Science and Medicine, there is ample room for multi-disciplinary research in life sciences and areas to train MD students. Also LEED Gold status, the Province of BC provided $100 million towards the project, with an additional $42 million coming from the Canada Foundation for Innovation and BC Knowledge Development Fund.

Additional funding was provided from UBC’s coffers. U —Information provided by John Metras, managing director of Infrastructure Planning, UBC Campus and Community Planning.

Sports

6

09.26.2011 |

Editor: Drake Fenton

T-Bird Standings Football Calgary UBC Manitoba Sask.

Regina Alberta

W

L

4 3 2 2 1 0

0 1 2 2 3 4

Soccer (M) W L 2 1 2 2 0 2 5 5

0 1 1 1 3 2 0 0

Soccer (W) W L

T

Calgary TWU Sask.

Victoria UBC Alberta Lethbridge Fraser Valley

Alberta TWU UBC Calgary Sask.

Victoria Fraser Valley Manitoba Lethbridge Regina

6 3 3 3 2 2 1 1

T

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The Thunderbirds’ defence shut down Manitoba in the second half of Saturday’s contest. UBC came from behind to win 29-23.

Defence, not Greene, will make or break UBC Moving the chains Drake Fenton I watched Moneyball on Friday night and then went and watched the UBC football team defeat the University of Manitoba Bisons 2923 on Saturday afternoon.

I realize that no player on the UBC football team is earning a salary, and that head coach Shawn Olson is not using sabermetrics to put his team together, but there is a direct correlation between Moneyball and UBC’s performance on Saturday.

I won’t dissect Moneyball too heavily in this column, but essentially what the movie suggests is that over the course of a season, putting faith in statistics will win you games. Unfortunately, as the Oakland Athletics found out in the playoffs, statistics cannot replace fundamentals when the success of the entire season is dependent on how a team can perform in a single game.

Statistically, the T-Birds have been impressive this season. At the halfway point of the season they’re 3–1, something they haven’t accomplished since 1999, and are in second place in the Canada West. Quarterback Billy Greene has been blowing up the stat sheet every week; in four games he has amassed almost 1500 total yards.

Though Greene has put up shiny numbers—including this week,

when he threw for 306 yards and 3 touchdowns with no interceptions—his statistical success will not be enough to mask UBC’s fundamental flaws.

Like the Oakland Athletics, UBC will not be a contender unless their fundamentals improve. Right now, the biggest question mark for the ‘Birds is the consistency of their defence.

Against the Bisons, UBC’s defence pulled a Jekyll and Hyde routine. Their performance in the first half was sub-par, but in the second half, they shut down a potent Manitoba offence.

As the old, and incredibly cliché, saying goes, “defence wins championships.” If UBC is going to have any shot at making a run at the Canada West title, their defence will have to make that cliché come true. For now, they need to focus on playing a full 60 minutes.

In the first half, UBC’s defence got torched on the ground and in the air. The defensive line struggled to generate an effective pass rush, and Manitoba’s quarterback Khaleal Williams had plenty of time to find open receivers.

Williams went 17 for 22 for 243 yards and threw 2 touchdowns.

Williams also rushed for 54 yards. When he scrambled out of the pocket, it wasn’t because the rush was getting to him, but because his offensive line managed to create enormous holes and scrambling became a viable option.

The defensive line and UBC’s linebackers were also unable to prevent Manitoba from

DAVID ELOP/ THE UBYSSEY

Billy Greene got off to a slow start Saturday but managed to throw for 200 yards and two touch downs in a second half comeback.

establishing a powerful running attack. In the first half, UBC surrendered 145 yards on the ground.

The T-Birds’ tackling was suspect, and when a team plays a “bend but don’t break” style of defence, missed tackles can’t happen. UBC wasn’t strong at the point of attack and they were consistently losing the battle at the line of scrimmage.

Simply, UBC’s defence broke.

To make matters worse, Billy Greene was not Superman-esque in the first half. He only threw for 107 yards and UBC only managed to score one touchdown. When Greene can’t put the team on his back, the defence needs to step up.

At some point this season, Greene is going to struggle or an opposing defence will manage to slow him down. When that happens, the defence needs to stop being Robin and become Batman.

Luckily, the second half of the game showed that the defence is capable of taking on that role.

After giving up 20 points in the first half, the defence held Manitoba to only three points in the second half.

“At the half, we went in the locker room and [the game] wasn’t going our way at all,” said defensive end Serge Kaminsky. “We just kind of said we need to do our job, we have to play as a team, we have to make our tackles, and we came out on fire in the second half, we did our jobs. We only let them get three points, it’s the tale of two defences right there. That’s how we should play all day.”

The big difference in the second half was that UBC didn’t break.

Manitoba still managed to gain large chunks of yards and was able to drive down the field, but when it counted, the defence shut them down.

With 12 minutes left on the clock and UBC leading 27-23, Manitoba had the ball on the ‘Birds’ 29 yard line. On second down, Williams dropped back to pass and Kaminsky knifed through the offensive line to come up with a sack. Manitoba missed the ensuing 47-yard field goal and the momentum of the game stayed in UBC’s favour.

Then, with two minutes left on the clock and the Bisons on

UBC’s nine-yard line, the defence came up huge again. On third down, Williams dropped back to pass and UBC brought the blitz.

Williams fired the ball out quickly to his check down man and UBC’s Adam Konar was all over the coverage, forcing the incompletion and essentially sealing Manitoba’s fate.

As the season goes on, Greene is going to continue to be a nightmare for opposing teams, but football is a team game. If the defence isn’t able to step up and play consistent, fundamental football, then this team is going to get stepped on in the postseason.

Next week, UBC will be travelling to Saskatchewan for a pivotal matchup against the Huskies. If UBC’s second half defence shows up, they will be a team built like the New York Yankees rather than the Oakland Athletics. U

Game Notes

3-1 1999 377 176

UBC’s record after Saturday’s game.

The last time UBC started a season 3-1.

Quarterback Billy Greene’s total yards.

Jordan Grieve’s total receiving yards

09.26.2011 | Sports

|7

HOCKEY >>

UBC crushes SAIT 5-0 in exhibition play Allison Mah Contributor

Six months after a disappointing end to their playoff hopes, the UBC Thunderbirds men’s hockey team crushed the Southern Alberta Institute of Technology (SAIT) Trojans 5-0 Saturday night, sweeping both games in the first exhibition series of the new season.

If there’s any rust left over from the summer, it hasn’t shown.

The Thunderbirds drew first blood on a power play as Justin McCrae fired a quick one-timer from the slot, giving the home team an early 1-0 advantage.

Shortly after, UBC scored two goals less than a minute apart on a weak wrister by Jordan Inglis and an alert tap-in by March-Antione Juneau after some frantic play in front of the Trojan net.

In a game that was clearly out of hand for the visitors after the first 20 minutes, the Thunderbirds did a good job maintaining focus and applying continual pressure, punctuating the beginning and end of the second period with goals by Scott Brkich and McCrae. Despite some hostility at the end of the period, UBC emerged unscathed on the scoreboard 5-0.

In the last frame, the Thunderbirds’ emotions seemed to get the better of them as they engaged in multiple scrums and both sides took senseless penalties, nine of which were drawn in the third period alone. At this point, the game was out of reach. The Trojans were playing to hurt, and UBC was not entirely immune to their antics.

“I thought [SAIT] was pretty

ERIC INASI/THE UBYSSEY

UBC’s Dalton Pajak dangles around a SAIT defender Saturday night.

undisciplined and took some bad penalties in the third period,” said UBC head coach Milan Dragicevic.

“We just wanted to keep our composure and not lose anybody to injury because it was a little rough out there. I just kept telling

U

LET’S GO INSIDE THE MIND OF A BILLY GREENE COME BY THE UBYSSEY OFFICE SUB 24, FOLLOW THE SIGNS

the players, play the game like it’s 0-0 and just focus on ourselves.

Don’t worry what the other team is doing.”

One of the more intriguing recruits coming into Saturday’s game was goaltender Steven

Stanford. In his previous season with the Saskatoon Blades, he tallied an impressive 40 wins in 48 games with a 2.78 GAA and .910 save percentage.

The strong reputation preceding Stanford seemed to prove itself

on Saturday night. He looked calm and composed, handling the puck with relative ease and making a number of point blank stops en route to a 23-save shutout win.

One of the major storylines heading forward will be the goaltending match-up between Stanford and Jordan White, the latter of whom carried the Thunderbirds through last year’s season with solid and consistent play.

“We knew we were going to bring in another goaltender and it’s going to be a competition between those two guys. We’ll give them both the opportunity in the exhibition to see who we want to start. They’re both going to get better because of it. I thought tonight Steven was very composed, played the puck very well and made the key saves, especially early in the first period,” said Dragicevic.

As for the rest of the new recruits, Dragicevic was pleased by what he saw.

“I thought [Cole] Prudin, [Michael] Wilgosh, Juneau and [Cole] Wilson all played very well up front. They created a lot. Every one of our players has to contribute, whether they’re first-year or fifth-year, it doesn’t matter. They have to be buying into the role that’s given to them, be part of the team and contribute on and off the ice.”

Whether the Thunderbirds will completely buy into this philosophy is yet to be determined. But they’re off to a good start.

Their next home game will be the regular season opener versus the Calgary Dinos on October 7 at 7pm. U

Culture

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Editor: Ginny Monaco

VANCOUVER >>

Mayor Gregor gets in on the joke Jonny Wakefield Print Editor

Top left: North Shore, Lake Surperior by AY Jackson. Bottom left: Canturbury Meadows by Thomas Sidney Cooper. Right: Mao by Andy Warhol.

COURTESY OF THE VANCOUVER ART GALLERY

ART >>

Vancouver Art Gallery celebrates 80 years with retrospective Mike Dickson Contributor

It looks a lot like Chairman Mao is wearing lipstick. That might be the point.

Mao, by Andy Warhol, is one of the works being shown as part of the Vancouver Art Gallery’s (VAG) newest exhibit, titled An Autobiography of Our Collection.

To celebrate its 80th birthday, the gallery is displaying 100 works carefully selected to tell the story of the VAG, chosen from among the 10,000-plus holdings in their collection.

With such a vast array of works

and limited space to show them, the gallery turned to curators Iain Thom and Heidi Reitmaier to select the pieces they feel best capture the essence of the gallery’s storied past and its future aspirations. It’s a task that requires some difficult decisions.

“When you have over 10,000 objects to choose from, you have to make some fairly definite choices,” said Thom, senior historical curator at the VAG. “We’ve tried to look at some of the major strengths of the collection and also where it’s changed dramatically to tell the entire story of the gallery.”

Among the works on display is

George Segal’s Execution, being shown for the first time in over ten years, which depicts the aftermath of an execution. Others include The Sheep’s Nose by Arthur Lismer of Group of Seven fame, works by Emily Carr, posters by Lawrence Weiner and Canterbury Meadows by Thomas Sidney Cooper, one of the gallery’s first aquisitions.

The gallery’s social and cultural roles are also explored in the exhibit with works like Confused Sexual Views by Paul Wong. In 1985, its presentation was cancelled by the gallery director for its controversial subject matter, which sparked outrage in the Vancouver art

community. The gallery acquired the work in 2000.

The VAG’s collection continues to expand, and the gallery is hoping for a new home to accommodate this fact. “With such a vast and varied collection,” said Thom, “it’s tough to tell the whole story when there aren’t enough pages to write on.

“One thing this show demonstrates is that there are some real gems in the Vancouver Art Gallery,” he said. “We have some of the most important collections of a number of major BC artists, and that’s one reason among many we’d like a new home to show them.” U

Under review THEATRE >>

The Light in the Piazza shines Justin McElroy Coordinating Editor

The Light in the Piazza is the most curious of musicals.

It’s a show that premiered on Broadway in 2005, but has an aesthetic and sensibility firmly rooted in the 20th century. There are no muppets or puppets or Disney characters, no classic rock standards or Mormons, little meta-humour and no million-dollar sets.

There are, however, earnest and conflicted characters, trying to find meaning in their life and expressing it through song.

In other words, it’s a traditional musical. And in the confines of a small theatre, performed by a talented cast, The Light in the Piazza (pardon the pun) shines.

Set in Italy during the summer of 1953, the show tracks the romance of the winsome Clara Johnson, who while vacationing falls in love with Fabrizio Naccarelli, a young man cut from the cloth of every traditional Italian family set to stage or screen.

The catch?

Clara’s mother, Margaret, is less than thrilled with the romance and happens to be traveling with Clara. Katey Wright plays Margaret

expertly, creating a tension that drives the first act and provides a fascinating character study in the second.

Sometimes the Naccarellis speak and sing in broken English, sometimes in fluent Italian, but the audience will never be lost.

The songs, performed by a fiveperson band that plays on, rather than under the stage, are not of the hummable variety, but the lush, neo-Romantic score brings out the sweeping emotions of love and yearning inherent in the plot.

Yes, some of the songs are performed in Italian—but allow yourself to get swept up in the moment as the characters do, and you will be rewarded. U GRAPHIC NOVELS >>

Pre-WWII Germany + comics= a success for Lester’s The Listener Linda Peng Contributor

David Lester is a man of many talents. Though primarily a visual artist and guitarist in the Vancouverbased band Mecca Normal, Lester recently wrote and illustrated his first graphic novel.

The Listener ties together the story of Germany’s last democratic election before Hitler’s rise

COURTESY OF LIGHT IN THE PIAZZA

The Light in the Piazza plays at the Norman and Annette Rothstien Theatre until Oct 9.

to power with the story of a young sculptor whose art leads to a political act that claims the life of a civilian.

“I had no publisher when I started,” said Lester. “So I was operating on the basis of faith that someday, this might see the light of day, or it may not.”

Lester need not to worry. His book is getting rave reviews from the public and critics alike, including Publishers Weekly and the prestigious New York magazine, School Library Journal.

The decision to create a graphic novel was an easy one for Lester.

“When it came time to tell the

story, it seemed natural to write it as a graphic novel as opposed to just prose, because then I got to explore art, and that’s how I am most comfortable,” he said. “For me, it just seemed natural.”

The book, which was originally intended as a 100-page, one-year project, developed over the course of seven years. The resulting product was just over 300 pages.

When asked whether he has any words of wisdom for aspiring writers, Lester simply said, “Stamina, both physical and mental; a belief that whatever you are working on is worth doing; and have a damn good idea.” U

Attending a roast in the lead-up to a major election may not seem like the best idea for an embattled incumbent politician. But in what must have been one of the strangest “gets” in its three year history, the Olio Festival managed to convince Mayor Gregor Robertson to appear onstage for an hour of embarrassment.

Last Thursday’s Comedy Roast of Gregor Robertson, held at Club 560, showed that the mayor is in on the joke.

The roasters were a mix of people close to the mayor, including Vision city councillor Andrea Reimer and Mike Jackson, head of the waste management union, as well as some low–profile local comedians.

“Tonight is going to give new meaning to the phrase, ‘Who are these fucking hacks?’” said roastmaster Ryan Beil, the man behind the “Shit Harper Did” blog. “Is it political suicide? Maybe.”

Robertson, fresh out of a city council meeting which reportedly lasted eight hours, played along well. Seated in a faux leather chair beneath a huge portrait which proclaimed him “Man of the Hour,” Robertson squirmed around and occasionally updated his Twitter account, but mostly kept his cool throughout the hour-long roast.

Kaitlin Fontana played Lacey Lewis of the People to Re-elect Gregor Robertson, and peppered her act with lots of mouth-breathing creepiness.

“Let’s talk about the bike lanes.

And the spandex bike shorts,” she said, before confessing her love to our famously handsome mayor.

“Let’s all agree that there should be a mayoral proclamation that those are mandatory for you all of the time.”

Even Reimer played off the weird sexual tension that occasionally follows the mayor.

“I’ve known Gregor for a long time, stretching all the way back to when I was a brand new executive director at the Western Canada Wilderness Committee,” she said.

“And like all young executive directors of environmental non-profits, I had a need for something only Gregor could provide. Free juice.”

Jackson, a barrel-chested union man, joked about the mayor’s greenest city aspirations.

“You can learn a lot about people by what they throw away. But I wasn’t able to dig up anything on Gregor, because he doesn’t throw anything away,” he said. “So I asked my buddies in recycling, and they found an unwashed tetrapack in his blue box. What a slime ball.”

Overall, though, the roast was apolitical. Not once did anyone mention the riots. Only occasional jabs were taken at Suzanne Anton, Robertson’s rival in the upcoming municipal elections.

In the end, Robertson’s chance to say a few words for himself came off as any old stump speech. It seemed like he wasn’t entirely clear what he had agreed to do, but managed to play down his obvious bewilderment by turning on the politician switch.

“I think they were very funny and nice to me; it could have been a lot worse,” he told The Ubyssey after the show. “Most people save [roasts] for their retirement. It shows how funny people in Vancouver can be.” U

09.26.2011|Advertisement | 9

A SUPERIOR

KIND OF

CULTURE WRITE FOR THE UBYSSEY

Ginny Monaco culture@ubyssey.ca

Opinion

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Editor: Brian Platt

The cult of Gregor Editor’s Notebook Jonny Wakefield

This is your mayor. He is better than you in every possible way and he knows it.

VIRGINIE MÉNARD/THE UBYSSEY

The Last Word Parting shots and snap judgments on today’s issues U-Pass reversal was an unnecessary problem It is good that UBC has made a quick change to its policy on withholding U-Passes from students on financial hold. But the university should never have had this “punishment” in the first place, considering UBC’s stated commitment to aiding students in financial need.

Some people won’t even receive their student loans until October 7.

Bursary deadlines are September 15. Applications for subsidies for the U-Pass, SUB fees and AMS fees aren’t even available until the end of September. Opt-outs have finished for some groups like The Ubyssey, but are just starting for the resource groups and CiTR. Only after all these financial sources are exhausted can UBC students try obtain last-minute funds through Policy 72, which holds that no eligible student will be denied their courses for financial reasons alone.

Most students have a legitimate reason for not being able to pay their fees by the deadline (though yes, sometimes it’s just laziness.)

We’re glad you’ve realized this, oh benevolent university. We look forward to riding the bus in October.

Student union staff quietly keep things running The Simon Fraser Student Society (SFSS) is currently engaged in a lockout with its unionized administrative staff. There are a few issues at play, but the main one is wages; the SFSS is facing a large structural deficit and wants to reduce wages, while the union is obviously fighting against that.

We aren’t going to take sides in this dispute, but it is worth reflecting on how seriously it affects a student union to not have its administrative staff working. The AMS would be crippled if its employees stopped processing the cheques, compiling and emailing documents, keeping track of complex code and

bylaw requirements and managing its various businesses.

So appreciate these people, is what we’re saying. While student politicians are often in the limelight (for good reasons and otherwise), they are only able to go about their business because of a small group of dedicated employees quietly working away in the background.

Are you ready for some football?

The Thunderbirds football team played their homecoming game this weekend and it was awesome.

There were loads of people in the stands, the drinks were flowing in the beer garden and there was even a marching band. Best of all, UBC won 29-23 against the University of Manitoba, giving them a 3-1 record on the season.

This is looking like the best football team we’ve had in years.

Unless things go horribly wrong, we’ll have a football team in the playoffs for the first time since 2006, and likely a home playoff game for the first time since 1999.

On top of that, the Vanier Cup is in Vancouver this year.

So if you haven’t already, jump on the bandwagon and enjoy the ride. Just don’t riot if we lose.

Aquatic Centre site options don’t seem like a choice After months of strange smells, broken steam rooms and alleged sludge, the plans to replace the Aquatic Centre are underway.

However, as we move into UBC’s consultation phase, it seems a little too familiar: three development site options. Three is a magic number, we get it. Not too many, not too few, just right. But it’s reminiscent of other situations where it’s clear that there’s a “best choice” (read: the choice the university’s committee is advocating for) and the other alternatives are presented as nearly unfeasible.

In this case, it may be true that the only place where the Aquatic Centre can go is MacInnes Field— or that could simply be where university wanted it from the beginning, and the other alternatives have been shunned. We know, for example, that the AMS is annoyed that their preferred option (the L-shape around the SRC) doesn’t appear to be getting full consideration.

We’d be better suited to cast judgment on this if the Gage South & Environs working group sessions were open to the public. Instead, the working group meetings are closed, and we are left to trust that the university has given due diligence to all of the possible Aquatic Centre sites. This is a tough pill to swallow.

At the very least, if we’re going to be given multiple choices for public consultation, make them actual choices, not red herrings.

Pendulum closure is bad news for campus vegans Going vegan generally isn’t too difficult—unless you spend a lot of time on campus.

There are still a few solid options here. Bernoulli’s Bagels has a serviceable vegan-friendly menu and Sprouts is always reliable for a selection of baked goods.

But as anyone will tell you, The Pendulum is the go-to spot for those who adhere to a cruelty-free diet. Between their salads, wraps and vegan stew, there are plenty of lunch and dinner options. Their vegan brownie is also one of the best in the city.

It’s good that the AMS plans to keep a scaled-down Pendulum menu at The Gallery when the former closes in January. But the scaled-down menu also likely means that the variety of vegan options will be cut back. For a university striving towards increased sustainability, vegan and vegetarian options should be a priority. U

When comedian Ryan Beil welcomed “our fair mayor, his worship” Gregor Robertson to the stage for a roast last Thursday at Club Five Sixty, he did so with tongue in cheek. But as the following hour of comedy showed, it’s easy to talk about the mayor of Vancouver as though he’s infallible.

It was clear from the outset that Robertson was among friends. The roast was really little more than a gentle ribbing, and the caricatures that emerged of the mayor were predictable and almost always good-natured. We saw Gregor as the spandex-clad eco-warrior, Gregor as the Vancouver sex symbol, and in a bit by a comedian dressed as a Vancouver police officer, Gregor as an idealistic child pretending to drive a SkyTrain.

It was the kind of uniquely Vancouver political theatre at which Robertson excels. Whenever he finds himself in a sticky situation, Robertson knows where he needs to be to shore up his base. If people are riled up by some new bike lanes, he holds a forum on cycling with ex-Talking Heads frontman David Byrne. If political opponents are trying to tar him with the hockey riots, he shows up for some free concerts and sings a song with Dan Mangan.

Getting roasted in the middle of campaign season, which Beil jokingly described as political suicide, was actually a pretty risk-free proposition for the mayor. Robertson got to show his good humour— something NPA candidate Suzanne Anton has a problem with—and made a fairly typical stump speech to some of the movers and shakers

in Vancouver’s arts scene. Not to mention the nice photo op it made for the reporters. All in all, it wasn’t a bad way to spend an evening.

It’s at public events like these where the mythos around Robertson develops. It was clear that this wasn’t the first time he’s heard jokes about his “juice” and pectorals. Reporters have been asking about his “GQ” good looks since he first ran. And it’s better to have people focus on high profile things like bike lanes and green initiatives (and, in turn, his thighs and penchant for organics) as opposed to issues that might hurt him politically.

The reality is that Robertson is so tied to these issues that it seems out of place to try and take him to task on anything else. The fact that city hall has remained relatively unscathed in the aftermath of the riots is remarkable. Blame was reserved for anarchists and fans from Surrey and Burnaby, not the municipality that set up the big screen TVs and invited a bunch of drunks into an undefended downtown core. And there are a number of lower profile issues we can point to: record campaign spending, mysterious million dollar donations and the closures of the East Van cultural spaces responsible for the artists that graced the SummerLive Stages. For a group of people who often decry a “no-fun” Vancouver, this seemed like the perfect opportunity to take potshots.

People seem to have a hard time associating Robertson with anything but bike lanes and the Greenest City plan. And beyond the opinions of a select few downtown business owners and the city’s cohort of cyclists, bike lanes are pretty apolitical. Robertson’s approval ratings reflect it.

Robertson is the fun mayor in a no-fun city, and it seems likely that it will stay that way. U

LaBoeuf, you are on notice Editorial Shia Laboeuf. The Ubyssey. The two entities have never crossed paths before. They will likely never meet again. But this autumn, the planets have aligned. LaBoeuf and The Ubyssey will, ever so briefly, share the same orbit.

Yet not all is well in this relationship. We have a beef with LaBoeuf.

Starting this month, LaBoeuf— best known for acting alongside robots, humans and Megan Fox in Michael Bay films—is in Vancouver shooting a film. Entitled The Company You Keep and directed by Hollywood legend Robert Redford, LaBoeuf plays an ambitious young journalist who discovers that wealthy lawyer Jim Grant, played

by Redford, is a former Weather Underground militant who used to dabble in robbery and murder.

The Company You Keep is slated to film at UBC, with at least one scene planned for the Pendulum.

Now, the Pendulum has been a Ubyssey haunt for decades. Thus, we have interest in this movie succeeding. But for Laboeuf to master his role, he needs to do what any actor worth his salt has done for decades—see it firsthand, method style.

Concerned citizens that we are,

The Ubyssey extended the invitation to LaBoeuf to enter our office and learn what it truly means to be a young, ambitious journalist. The crippling fear that the newspaper industry will continue to cut jobs until the end of time. The hunger to get that scoop, to get that quote, to prove that you are a journalist who will not be fucked around with. The frustration when the events page hasn’t been done and you need to find three more random events from the UBC Events website. The bitter cynicism that sees every event as a sign that the world will continue to screw you and your generation over until the end of time. The thrill when your workday is finished and you gorge on wings and beer.

But our generous offer was declined. “Unfortunately Shia does not participate in much press while he is working,” wrote his publicist, “so will be unavailable to participate.”

Now listen, LaBoeuf. It doesn’t have to be like this. We can be friends. It’s not too late to reverse your course.

But Labeouf Watch starts now.

Either accept our invitation, or we’ll be on your ass like a starved student journalist on a 25-cent buffalo wing.

Megatron’s got nothing on us.

The clock is ticking. U

Scene

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Pictures and words on your university experience

HUMOUR>>

Beware of documented debauchery Melodramatic Musings Will Johnson My roommate has an incriminating video of me on her iPhone.

The first image is of my heaving back as I struggle to pull myself off my living room floor. My face is red and pressed against the carpet. I look like a newborn calf learning how to walk as I struggle up into a sitting position.

“Don’t judge me,” I drunkenly slur at the two girls giggling nearby on the couch. Then, just in case they didn’t get the message the first time, I wave my finger in their faces and repeat the command.

“Don’t judge me, okay?”

Not long after this, for reasons I’m unable to explain, I take hold of one girl’s ankle and kiss the arch of her foot.

“Fuckin’ Sean,” I complain. “He got me so shit-faced.”

“No, Will. You got yourself shitfaced,” warns my roommate, who is narrating the scene in her best maternal tone. “You have no one to blame but yourself.”

After I sling my computer off the coffee table, palm a pierogi and

shove it into my mouth, I lumber towards the camera like a hippopotamus and kiss my roommate on the forehead.

For just a moment, the entire screen is filled with my pink flesh.

Then I stumble off to my bedroom.

For weeks, my roommate has been showing this video to my friends, who laugh and inevitably ask for it to be played again. They shake their heads and chuckle knowingly, because chances are, they’ve seen this type of behaviour from me before.

The rise of digital media has changed the entire landscape of social drinking. A few years ago, a particularly gruesome bout of alcoholism only led to a vengeful hangover or some oft-repeated stories at the bar. Nowadays, your actions can be captured for posterity and endlessly replayed.

Another friend recorded a video of my karaoke performance in a skeezy Whitehorse bar called the Boiler Room earlier this summer. As per usual, I chose to perform Third Eye Blind’s “Semi-Charmed Life.”

Though this song is one of my favourites, the only part I could sing with any confidence was the chorus.

In the video I strut across the stage, dancing like a brain-damaged gorilla. I fumble the lyrics and struggle to hit notes I’ve never attempted in my life.

INDIANA JOEL/ THE UBYSSEY

As the Game Seven rioters found out the hard way, your drunken exploits can come back to bite you in the ass.

I remember the performance as an all-around success. The video evidence cruelly taught me otherwise.

So next time you decide to drink 15 beers and make a blithering

idiot of yourself (a practice I strongly encourage for continued mental health), take stock of the various recording instruments present. And decide if you’re

okay with being the star of a debauchery documentary. Because whether you want to or not, sooner or later you’re going to make your debut. U