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February 2015 • PRICELESS

the money issue Lenders

lawye r s

lov e r s


TOPS AROUND TOWN 25 Out & About 26 TOPS January Preview Party I 28 TOPS January Preview Party II 30 Adult IDD Christmas Party 32 The Bourbon Classic Christmas Party I 34 The Bourbon Classic Christmas Party II 36 New Year’s Eve I 38 New Year’s Eve II 40 UK Basketball Action I 42 UK Basketball Action II 170 Henry Clay Medallion for Distinguished Service 2014 I 172 Henry Clay Medallion for Distinguished Service 2014 II 174 Martin Luther Kin, Jr. Day Celebrations I 176 Martin Luther Kin, Jr. Day Celebrations II 178 Progressive Dinner to Benefit the Lexington Philharmonic I

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180 Progressive Dinner to Benefit the Lexington Philharmonic II 182 National Association of Women Business Owners (NAWBO) Holiday Affair 184 Lexington Art League Gala 210 TOP Shots

174 Captions for event photos are typically provided to TOPS by the event organizers. We do our best to check names and spelling…but we are all human and make mistakes. Please contact kristen@topsmarketing.com with any corrections and we will make note of it in the next issue.

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IN EVERY ISSUE 44 Sports: We Can Talk About “IT” Now 47 Posh Paws: Pet Insurance 48 Etiquette & Entertaining: Party Possibilities Galore

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97 Gardening: The Valentine Rose 128 Fashion: Loving Leggings 130 Luxurious Living 164 Parties: Celebrate Your Little Ones 165 Family: Love Languages for Grownups 168 What’s New 186 TOP 5 Dining: Romantic Dining 189 Recipes: Valentine’s Day Breakfast in Bed 196 Weddings: ‘Something New’ and a Silver Sixpence for Your Shoe, Too! 198 Lesley’s List 200 Lex & The City 205 Save the Date

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The views and comments expressed by the authors are not always that of our editors or publishers. While every effort has been made to ensure the accuracy of the information in this publication, TOP Marketing Group accepts no responsibility or liability for any errors, omissions or resultant consequences, including any loss or damage arising from the reliance on information in this publication. All images contained in TOPS in Lexington Magazine are subject to copyright of the artist or photographer as named, but not limited thereto. Reproduction of any part of this magazine without prior written permission is prohibited.

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TOPS Around Town

NEW YEARS EVE I Photos by Ron Morrow, Jim Burgett, Estill Robinson, Woody Phillips and Keni Parks As 2015 arrived, Lexington brought in the New Year with a plethora of great parties and events ranging from family friendly parties to cocktail hour at Lexington restaurants and bars. The end of 2014 was a celebration to remember for the people of Lexington! Scan here to see all the photos for this event at topsinlex.com

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TOPS Around Town

NEW YEARS EVE II Photos by Ron Morrow, Jim Burgett, Estill Robinson, Woody Phillips and Keni Parks Merry makers rung in 2015 in style! New Years Eve in Lexington was filled with gatherings featuring great music, food and drink. There were a wide variety of parties to join, ranging from family friendly parties to cocktail hour at some of the finer downtown Lexington restaurants and bars. Scan here to see all the photos for this event at topsinlex.com

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TOPS Around Town

UK BASKETBALL I Photos by Keni Parks, Michael Huang, and Woody Phillips It has been no surprise that the University of Kentucky Men’s basketball team has led a successful first half of the season. With the guidance of Coach Calipari, the team has worked their way to the top while being divided into two well-known groups: The Blue Platoon and The White Platoon. The boys are number one ranked and have been in-a-class-of-their-own as they have been undefeated thus far in the season. ukathletics.com

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Scan here to see all the photos for this event at topsinlex.com


TOPS Around Town

UK BASKETBALL II Photos by Keni Parks, Michael Huang, and Woody Phillips The University of Kentucky Wildcat’s men’s basketball team is holding strong this year. The team is in-a-class-of-their-own, wowing crowds with their defeats. They are thus far ranked number 1 in the SEC with an undefeated record. Led by Coach Calipari it is no surprise to the city of Lexington that these boys are doing us proud. This first half of the season is keeping Wildcat fans on edge for the rest of the year. ukathletics.com

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Scan here to see all the photos for this event at topsinlex.com


Etiquette & Entertaining

Party Possibilities Galore In

February, the shortest month of the year, there are more holidays than in any of the longer months. Anyone who entertains often will attest to the fact that theme parties are the easiest to plan. It is the theme that coordinates the colors, decorations and foods. It also adds an element of surprise and excitement to the party. The cold drabness of the winter needs to be left at the door when the guests enter a theme party.

square of heavy plastic. Mound dirt or potting soil on the plastic hollowing out a hole in the center. Place a stuffed animal resembling a Groundhog in the hole. Votive candles randomly placed on the table complete the look. The menu could feature brown foods creatively presented. Possibilities are Black Bean soup, small sandwiches on dark brown bread and chocolate mousse. Once you begin thinking along the line of a brown party, ideas spark. Valentine’s Day Parties have been recognized with red roses and heart-shaped cakes. Changing the party into a costume party offers a different focus. Have guests and their significant other come dressed as “Two Great Lovers”. Parades and prizes always turn into memorable moments. To select an interesting seating arrangement at the table, cut out a red paper heart for each guest. Then cut the heart into two pieces with angles, curves, etc. Give one half piece to each person while the other half of the heart is at a place on the table. Guests match their part of the heart to the one on the table. Random seating then takes place. Washington’s Birthday Party could be set up as an actual birthday. Instead of cake, serve a Cherry Pie cut with a hatchet instead of a knife. Use signage to show the house as Mt. Vernon, the hostess as Martha and the host as George. Costumes for Martha and George would add a fun note. Further research will reveal other historical references.

What qualifies February as a “Party Month”? It is not just the holidays in the second month of the New Year but the additional party possibilities as well. A February party can celebrate Super Bowl, Groundhog’s Day, Valentine’s Day, Washington’s Birthday, Lincoln’s Birthday, President’s Day, Mardi Gras, Chinese New Year, and a U.K. Wildcat Party. Suggestions for some of these parties are: Groundhog’s Day Party – On the invitation, ask guests to wear brown. Have guests make hats out of brown paper bags to be worn during the party. Decorate with enlarged poster-size pictures of the guest of honor, the Groundhog! Prepare pieces of paper with different times. Put them in a brown hat. Have each guest write their name and time they think the ground hog will see his shadow. Draw out one piece of paper which will determine the correct time. The person who guesses closest to that time wins a prize. The prize could be a six-pack of decorated brown bottles of beer. Cover the table with a burlap cloth. In the center, place a

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Lincoln’s Birthday Party will provide another historical research project. The party or a portion of the party could be held at the Mary Todd Lincoln House. With the many Todd-Lincoln ties in the Lexington area, the party would be an ideal Scavenger Hunt Party. Presidents’ Day Party – Have each invitation designate the name of a President or President’s wife. Then, the guests would arrive dressed as the assigned person or with a sign noting a famous quote from the assigned person. The menu should feature foods liked by some of the Presidents. Small signs would identify the foods. For example: Washington’s Cherry Pie, Regan’s Jelly Beans, Kennedy’s New England Clam Chowder and Lincoln’s Chicken Fricassee. With nine party possibilities in February and 28 days, all you party people can throw a party every three days with one day left over to plan for a March party. Have Fun!

by Sue Ann Truitt Etiquette & Entertaining Consultant


Mortgage Loans

You’ll need a mortgage first! by Billie Dollins

Buying a new home can be a stressful adventure; now, add-in “shopping for the right mortgage loan” and you’ve got yourself a full blown panic attack! Shopping for the right mortgage loan is one of the most important steps in becoming a new homeowner. Who has the lowest rate? How much should I pay in closing costs? Should I get a fixed or adjustable rate loan? How much cash do I need up front? How much of a payment can I afford? All of these questions can be answered during what is called a mortgage pre-approval. Most banks offer this service; more importantly, realtors will love you when you show up with a pre-approval letter in hand stating how much you can afford to pay for a home and you’ve already gone through some of the preliminary screening; i.e. credit rating, income vs. debt calculations, etc. So, what happens if you find your dream home before you’ve been preapproved? The sellers have accepted your offer and you now have thirty (30) days to secure financing. Here comes the “panic attack”! Here are some tips on what to do and what NOT to do when applying for a mortgage loan.

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1. Contact several banks and/or mortgage companies to obtain rates, fixed and variable (ARM) rates. Shop aggressively to get the best deal! A fixed rate will not change for the life of the loan and variable rates will/can change up or down, depending on the structure of the loan. If this is your “forever” home, then you probably want to go with a fixed option. If you don’t plan to stay in the house for longer than 5 – 7 years, an adjustable rate might save you some money on interest. Keep in mind though…rates will go up; it’s just a question of when that will happen. 2. Calculate how much of a payment you can afford. A good lender will counsel you on how much that is. There are numerous financial calculators online that you can use also. Very helpful! Don’t forget to consider how much you spend on utilities, groceries, gas, vacations, etc. A good rule of thumb is your total debt should be no greater than 40% of your total gross income, monthly. If you want to include your property taxes and homeowner’s insurance in your mortgage (escrow), this will increase your monthly payment. Refer to your Good Faith Estimate (GFE). 3. Know how much of a down payment you can afford. Some lenders require 20% of the home’s purchase price as a down payment.


Mortgage Loans

However, many lenders now offer loans that require less than 20%, sometimes as little as 5%, depending on the structure of the loan. Lookout though, if 20% isn’t paid down; some lenders will require you to purchase Private Mortgage Insurance (PMI) to protect the lender in case the buyer fails to pay. This can substantially increase your monthly mortgage payment. Ask about all the lender’s programs. 4. Know your credit score! You can obtain a copy of your personal credit report from major reporting agencies; i.e. Equifax.com, TransUnion.com or Experian.com. They will charge a minimal fee ($12 -$15). Review your report carefully and make sure any mistakes, missing or outdated information is corrected prior to applying for a mortgage loan. Get any changes/corrections in writing. Your lender will require this. Generally, a credit score of 720 or higher is considered strong; under 660 is looked upon as weak and may lead to you paying a higher interest rate. 5. Before signing for the loan, your lender is required to provide you with a full, detailed breakdown of all costs associated with the mortgage loan (GFE). This is very important as it will show you how much the loan will cost you in fees and how much you will need in cash, at closing. Home loans can have many fees, such as loan origination, underwriting fees and broker fees. Watch out for “no cost” or “low cost” loans because they can have higher interest rates. Ask for an explanation of any fee that you do not understand. Some fees can be negotiable, always ask! You will hear the word “points” which are fees paid directly to the lender and are often linked to the interest rate. You can pay more points to get a lower interest rate. Weigh your costs vs. actual interest savings before making this decision. Each “point” equates to 1% of your mortgage balance. While points are often rolled into your loan and have a minimal effect on monthly payment, they do increase the overall cost of the loan. 6. Be prepared to provide a lot of documentation to verify what you are saying on your application. The lender will look at your previous financial records, so make sure you have them in order before sitting down to apply for the loan. • Copy of W-2 form for the most recent two years of employment. • Year-to-date paystub(s) • Most recent two years 1099’s for retirement/social security/ commission/VA income. • Divorce decree for alimony or child support, if applicable. • Copies of complete individual federal tax returns covering the most recent two year period.

• If you are self-employed, copies of complete business tax returns covering the most recent two year period. • A copy of the homeowner’s policy or binder showing proof of insurance for one year. • If purchase, you will need a sales contract signed by all parties. Doing your homework before applying for a mortgage loan can be a bit overwhelming, but following these tips can make the process much easier. A good lender will spend time with you because they want your business. He/she should explain the many financing options available. Remember to shop, compare, ask questions and understand what you are being told! Fair lending is required by law! The Equal Opportunity Act prohibits lenders from discriminating against credit applicants in any aspect of the a credit transaction on the basis of race, color, reli-

gion, national origin, sex, marital status, age, whether all or part of the applicant’s income comes from a public assistance program, or whether the applicant has in good faith exercised a right under the Consumer Credit Protection Act. The Fair Housing Act prohibits discrimination in residential real estate transactions on the basis of race, color, religion, sex, handicap, familial status, or national origin. Under these laws, a consumer cannot be refused a loan based on these characteristics nor be charged more for a loan or offered less favorable terms based on such characteristics. The FDIC website offers a very good Mortgage Shopping Worksheet at fdic.gov/consumers/looking/. •

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Love Your Lender

First Security Bank HAMBURG BANKING CENTER, 2352 SIR BARTON WAY | 859.899.8880 WELLINGTON BANKING CENTER, 345 RUCCIO WAY | 859.410.6560 FIRSTSECURITY.NET

Lance J. Lawrence, SVP/Lexington Market Exec. Addam Lewis, VP/Retail Market Manager Ryan M. Cooper, VP/Commercial Lending Nathan A. Bay, Mortgage Loan Originator Not pictured, Gesela Flesher Brown, Mortgage Loan Originator

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n January 2, First Security Bank opened its second location in the Lexington market at Ruccio Way. The Owensboro, KY. based bank has differentiated itself from larger competitors with its focus on relationship banking and the ability to make credit and other business decisions locally. Lance works extensively with real estate professionals and business owners. A graduate of Georgetown College, Lance has over 15 years of lending experience and is a member of the LBAR, HBAL, and Commerce Lexington. “We are in a competitive industry, and it means a lot

to me that our customers choose First Security for their financial needs,” says Lance. Addam played football at Concord University and has been a lender for 15 years. His civic involvement includes the Reach Program, MBA, YRB, and LBAR. Ryan has a B.A. in Economics from the University of Kentucky and belongs to Commerce Lexington, DLC, and HBAL. He has 14 years of experience in community and regional banking. “I have a great relationship with my clients, and I work hard for their success,” says Ryan. Nathan has a B.S. in Business Administration and Finance from the University of Kentucky. Nathan has 18 years of banking experience and volunteers for Habitat for Humanity and the Hope Center of Central Kentucky. Gesela is the newest member of the First Security Bank team. “I have been lucky to learn from others in my 20+ years in lending through community involvement, education, and networking,” says Gesela.

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Love Your Lender

Amerifirst Home Mortgage Bryan Dollins Branch Manager 859.368.8790 | 2039 REGENCY ROAD AMERIFIRST.COM

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ryan has been a lender for eleven years. For the last two and a half, he has been working with AmeriFirst, a stand-alone mortgage banker committed to doing business the right way. They pride themselves on establishing quality relationships with clients. “We feel like every time we are able to finance a home loan, that in some small way, we are a part of the family that just bought their dream home,” Bryan explained. In his spare time, Bryan enjoys taking bike rides in the mountains. His favorite TV show is “Two and a Half Men”.

NMLS#62611

Cooperative Business Services Perry Dunn, Assistant VP of Business Development 859.543.2507 | 2557 SIR BARTON WAY 40509 | CBSCUSO.COM

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erry has 23 years of bank experience with 17 years in commercial lending, including small business and middle market commercial credit. His experience covers investment real estate, owner-occupied real estate, SBA, revolving lines of credit and equipment finance. CBS provides commercial financing in partnership with area credit unions. “What separates CBS from the others is the ability to handle large, complex deals and completing them in a timely and honest manner,” he explained. Perry is committed to being successful as a father, husband and business leader in Central Kentucky. In his spare time, he enjoys tennis, snow skiing and coaching youth sports, as well as attending his sons’ sporting events

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Love Your Lender

Forcht Bank Jill Shirley Banking Center Manager 859.263.6809 | 3358 TATES CREEK ROAD FORCHTBANK.COM

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ill has recently joined the Forcht Bank team and is excited to bring her 15 years of lending experience to her customers. She has a passion for helping her clients achieve their goals and dreams. In doing so, she aims to help them save time and money while simplifying their lives! Jill considers herself to be hard-working and loyal, two qualities that certainly help her give her customers an excellent banking experience. In her spare time, Jill enjoys exercising, playing word games and listening to and playing music– she can play the drums! She particularly enjoys classic rock.

Prime Lending

859.554.4216 | 424 LEWIS HARGETT CR. SUITE 120 | PRIMELENDING.COM Seldon Sullivan, Sr. Loan Officer

NMLS#455467

Abdul Muhammad, Production Mgr.

NMLS#436167

Vee Pryor, Mortgage Loan Officer NMLS#716225

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rime Lending specializes in new home loans, refinancing, and renovation loans. Their caring staff helps make the process easy for clients. Abdul strives to provide a wonderful life for his family by helping other families obtain the dream of homeownership. “I believe the road to a great life starts at home and I want to help pave the way,” he said. Vee has been a lender for 7 years. She believes that treating people with respect and appreciation goes a long way in this industry. Seldon is a seasoned loan officer who gets a great deal of satisfaction helping her clients. Seldon said. “The greatest compliment I can receive is my loyal referral base.”

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Love Your Lender

Traditional Bank Shawn Woolum, Assistant VP 859.225.2197 | ZANDALE BANKING CENTER 2197 NICHOLASVILLE ROAD | TRADITIONALBANK.COM

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hawn joined Traditional Bank in 2014 to oversee lending and deposit operations at their new Zandale Banking Center. He brings over ten years of experience to the position, as well as a motivation to help others. “I love being a community banker,” he said. “This profession allows me to meet so many great people, build relationships and have a positive impact on people’s lives.” In his spare time, Shawn enjoys playing sports, fishing, hunting, golfing, cooking, spending time with family and attending UK sporting events. He says his proudest accomplishment is being the father to two wonderful children.

Benchmark Brad Hacker, Certified Mortgage Planner, 859.977.5239 | 1084 EAST NEW CIRCLE ROAD BRADLEYHACKER.BENCHMARK.US

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rad has been in the business for over 13 years. He specializes in helping clients select the mortgage that best fits their overall financial plans and goals. This level of comfort is why his clients are extremely loyal and satisfied. Benchmark is built on integrity, honesty, accessibility, attention to detail, and extensive knowledge of the mortgage industry. Brad is proud to help his team meet these goals every day. In his spare time, Brad enjoys golfing, hunting, fishing, reading and spending time with his family and friends. Brad considers himself a huge UK fan. He and his wife have two daughters.

NMLS#22435 | KyLic. 9457

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Love Your Lender

Benchmark Marty Preston, Partner 859.967.1777 | 1084 EAST NEW CIRCLE ROAD MARTYPRESTON.BENCHMARK.US

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arty, a UK alumnus and father of 4, became the first Certified Mortgage Planner in the state of Kentucky in 2004. He and his team use their extensive financial experience and expertise to ensure that each and every client can maximize their savings by tailoring the loan to the financial goals and needs of their family. When it comes to choosing a mortgage, Marty advises, “There are a lot of moving pieces people are not aware of so it is essential to have an advisor in your corner who understands the market and how to position you to save money.�

NMLS#20984 | KyLic. 8567

Benchmark David Willoughby Certified Mortgage Planner 859.977.5933 | 1084 EAST NEW CIRCLE ROAD DAVIDWILLOUGHBY.BENCHMARK.US

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enchmark Mortgage is a core values-based organization, focusing on achieving success through maintaining and improving client relationships, remaining dynamic, reaching for excellence and maintaining a positive attitude. They emphasize placing relationships above all other things. They base their business on preserving and strengthening all current and future client relationships. With 16 plus years of experience as a Certified Mortgage Planner, David specializes in VA, FHA, RHS and Conventional home loans. His family motivates him; he and his wife have seven children and five grandchildren. In his spare time, David enjoys watching his favorite sports teams, including the UK Wildcats.

NMLS#20146 | KyLic. 8536

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Love Your Lender

Fairway Independent Mortgage Corp. Dana Back-Pack, Branch Manager 859.621.0169 220 LEXINGTON GREEN CIRCLE STE 130 LOANSBYBACKPACK.COM

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ana is an accomplished mortgage lender with over 15 years of experience. Her areas of expertise include FHA, VA, Rural Housing Service and Kentucky Housing Corporation lending, in addition to conventional and jumbo loans. She specializes in customizing mortgage solutions and working with first-time homebuyers for low down payment programs. “My experience and industry knowledge assures my customers a smooth transaction from prequalification to closing,” Dana said. “I take great pride in having a stellar reputation and have been fortunate to have worked with outstanding people and companies throughout my career. I’ve learned to always have the client’s best interest at heart and appreciate their relationships first and foremost.” Dana was recently named Branch Manager for Fairway Independent Mortgage’s first Kentucky location. They proudly operate in 46 states and are currently rated the 5th largest lender in the nation. In her free time, Dana enjoys riding cross-country with her husband on their Harley-Davidson motorcycle. They are proud members of the Combat Veterans Motorcycle Association, which supports those who have defended our country. She also enjoys collecting stamps on her passport, experiencing other cultures, reading on her Kindle and spending time at the beach with friends.

NMLS#71942

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Road to Retirement

What you need to know and how to plan. by Barbara Meyer

The concept of retirement as we know it has its be-

ginning in the Industrial Revolution of the nineteenth century. At that time, work was much more dependent on manual labor, and without modern mandated safety standards and conditions, older workers had to retire simply because they couldn’t physically perform the work at their former levels. Retirement once represented an ending, whereas now it’s simply become the next phase in life, a phase that can be exciting and fulfilling—if planned for properly. Today, people gradually transition into retirement, cycling between jobs and retirement activities, often continuing to work part time at existing jobs while traveling, taking classes, consulting, or even starting new small businesses. Sound good? It can be, but before you start thinking about retiring, you should be thinking about how you’ll save for it, and you can begin right now.

Don’t Rely on An Outdated Roadmap A common, and dangerous mistake is to assume that since your parent or grandparent received a company-sponsored pension, a gold watch, and health insurance for life from a company that took care of everything upon retirement, you will too. Another misconception is that if you have worked all of your life, you can just rely on Social Security to cover your retirement needs, even if you have to live on a fixed income. “Today’s retirement planning must be very specific, fluid, and flexible”, says Bruce Hanks, president and CEO of Wealth Management of Kentucky, Inc. “Most people now have to rely on only what they can defer in their company’s 401K, IRA, or investments/savings.” Changing economic times and employment trends have eliminated the pensions of previous generations, and those that can still get healthcare must pay the biggest portion of those premiums. The increasing rate of inflation

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TOPS Cares

Board Chair Amy Wickliffe noted that while all donations are appreciated, job appropriate new, or nearly-new items for women are especially welcomed. “As our very first client said, “When you look good, you feel good” and the clothing in our boutique reflects that sentiment, enabling our clients to put their best selves forward when they are finished being suited. They walk out with a new found confidence and energy, much more prepared to land that new job.” According to Analisa, “We are truly blessed by the outpouring of support we have received from the community. As a young organization, we are in need of job appropriate attire for our women, supplies for our Career Center, and volunteers to help us make it all happen.” Although this amazing organization is locally based and operated, it’s one of 139 Dress for Success affiliates throughout the world. The Lexington organization was approved as an affiliate in 2012, and has become a highly regarded source of hope and inspiration, positively changing lives since opening its doors. •

HOW YOU CAN HELP Key individuals involved in this organization include Executive Director Analisa Wagoner, cofounder Jennifer Monarch, and Board Chair Amy Wickliffe. Following is their Top Priority Wish List: • Size 16+ clothing, conservative in color and style, appropriate for interviewing with a would-be employer, as well as ‘wearables’ to work once hired. • Long sleeve button-down shirts in all sizes—black and white—for those women working in the hospitality field. • Scrub tops and bottoms, any and all sizes needed for individuals who are seeking employment in medical facilities or child care. • Black no-skid ladies’ shoes for clients whose newfound employment requires standing on their feet for a significant amount of their work day. • Black neck ties for hospitality workers. • Donations of portfolios for clients who will be taking resumes, letters of recommendation and ways to showcase their creative work to prospective employers. • Work appropriate shoes in sizes 10+. Donations are accepted by appointment on Tuesdays and Thursdays. They are sorted and earmarked for the Suiting program, deemed inappropriate for the workplace and donated on to other partner organizations, or selected for one of their quarterly sales; the proceeds of which go directly back into funding their programs. They are also looking for mentors; local women who have the time, patience, and willingness to work with qualified job seekers who really need and would greatly appreciate gaining insights from individuals who understand how important self-confidence is when one is interviewing for a badly needed job. According to Wagoner, “If you’ve got mentoring or human resources experience—on any level—we’d welcome you as a volunteer in our Career Center. Nothing is as impactful for those we’re working to help as being able to sit down and discuss their hopes, expectations and fears for entry or re-entry into the job market with someone who has experience to share!” Contact: Analisa Wagoner, lexington@dressforsuccess.org or call 859-231-7848. You can also visit their website, dressforsuccess.org/lexington or find them on Facebook.

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The Law & You

by Barbara Meyer

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e live in a nation of laws, which dictate how we work and socialize with others. As a profession, lawyers go back to ancient Greece. Governments throughout history have had laws as their foundation, with lawyers helping to interpret those laws and uphold the courts and legal systems. From making purchases to our personal relationships, laws guide our actions. We all want to follow the law, but it takes knowledge and experience to truly understand it. That’s where the experts come in. Just as attempting to repair your car engine or fix your home furnace without having knowledge in those areas is potentially dangerous, in many instances trying to navigate complicated laws also invites disaster if done without the help of a lawyer. If you’re considering starting a business, buying a home, getting a divorce, writing your will, or any other of life’s milestones that involve legal guidelines, you should first consult an attorney. Laws change continually, and it’s important to work in conjunction with someone who is not only up-to-date on them, but who is trained to understand how they can be interpreted in a wide range of different circumstances. Since so much is riding on a favorable outcome, it’s vital that you have legal representation that’s trustworthy. But why is it that the lawyers have garnered a reputation for being anything but? Mostly because exaggerated portrayals of them are entertaining in spite of being inaccurate. Who comes to mind when you think of lawyers? For every Atticus Finch, the attorney in “To Kill A Mockingbird” who defies racism by defending an innocent African-American man accused of rape in a small Depression-era Alabama town, or the not-so-dumb fair-haired attorney Elle Woods in “Legally Blonde” who cleverly and stylishly defends her client in a murder trial, entertainment is packed with lawyers who lack their noble qualities. In the stage musical and subsequent movie “Chicago”, sleazy superstar celebrity attorney Billy Flynn doesn’t let the fact that his client actually is guilty of a murder charge stop him from razzle-dazzling his way to an acquittal. The ruthless, mob-controlled Memphis law partners serve as the villains

themselves in “The Firm”, and the legal team in the television show “L.A. Law” have more personal and romantic problems than the clients they serve. Even the lifestyles of real lawyers seen in media with their outlandish personal entanglements and extravagant incomes are also not a reflection of the lives of most attorneys. While many are well compensated for their time, expertise, and contributions, typically lawyers would cite helping people and getting them through difficult times of their lives in a way that changes them for the better as their calling. The practice of law can be “the grind of all grinds” — stressful, demanding, and requiring long hours and loads of paperwork. Lawyers must be knowledgeable about a number of different subjects, detail-oriented, flexible and open-minded as laws evolve to meet the needs of changing societies; such as new ones regarding the environment and digital privacy. Not to mention lawyers must be highly sensitive to the emotions that their clients are facing at what is often the worst time of their lives – anger, desperation, fear and despair. A LAWYER’S LIFE Most people think that all lawyers work in courtrooms every day, but there are actually far more working in offices than in trial settings. While a day in the life of a lawyer may involve time litigating a case, on other days of that week they might have consultations with clients or mediations with opposing counsel. That doesn’t include additional days spent researching and writing briefs, preparing responses, letters, demand packages, motions and other duties involving their cases. Lawyers are dedicated to their clients and subscribe to fiduciary duty, which means that they cannot allow their own interests, or those of another, to interfere with their representation of their client. Attorney-client privilege isn’t simply a figure of speech— lawyers cannot disclose what you tell them to anyone, from those in the courtroom to the police, if you tell them in confidence. In most states, a person taking the bar exam must undergo a moral character and background check in order to be eligible.

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The Law & You

It’s no easy feat becoming a lawyer, and law school applications far outnumber open spots. Becoming a U.S. lawyer requires a four-year degree (English, pre-law, or political science are popular), followed by three years of law school, then passing the bar exam. Familiar Faces in Law

Andrea Bocelli

John Cleese

What do singers Andrea Bocelli and Julio Iglesias, actor John Cleese, artists Henri Matisse and Wassily Kandinsky, sports figures Howard Cosell and Steve Young, and political leaders Mahatma Gandhi and Nelson Mandela have in common? They all earned law degrees. Successful lawyers are passionate, goal driven, prepared, witty, competent and caring. As both involve public speaking, a desire to help others, and a thorough knowledge of our judicial system, it’s no wonder that politics and law go hand-in-hand. 25 of our 44 presidents have been lawyers, including Barack Obama, a 1991 Harvard Law School graduate and former professor at the University of Chicago Law School. First Lady Michelle Obama is also a lawyer who also earned a law degree from Harvard Law School, and met her husband when they were both working at a Chicago law firm. Types of Law Laws are intertwined into all aspects of our lives, and the many different areas of law necessitate lawyers who are experts in those specific areas. Here are some of the more common ones, and the instances in which they’re used:

Henri Matisse

Family Law: divorce, separations and annulments, child custody, and child support. Business Law: starting a new business or partnership, basic business matters including taxes, mergers and acquisitions. Labor Law: advice and representation of you or your business in union matters, workplace safety issues, and compliance with government regulations like OSHA. Estate Planning: property management, wills, probate and estate planning.

Howard Cosell

Immigration: representing parties in citizenship and naturalization procedures. Intellectual Property: helping you to establish trademarks, patents, and navigate copyright regulations. Real Estate: assisting you while selling, buying, or renting a home or business, or developing properties or working with zoning issues.

Mahatma Ghandi

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Personal Injury: representing you if you’ve been injured through intent or neglect, and helping to file workers’ compensation claims through employers.

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Criminal law: proving your innocence or negotiating a plea bargain if you are accused of or involved with a crime. Criminal lawyers will provide representation for you should your case involve going before a judge or going to trial. They will also help you to prosecute someone who has committed a crime against you. Do-it-yourself doesn’t work Thinking of going it alone in court in order to save money? Think again. If you act as your own attorney, be aware that while it is legal to represent yourself, judges and courtroom personnel are not allowed to give you advice, and you will be held to all the same standards as an actual attorney, including following procedures, meeting deadlines, and completing paperwork. When there are potentially serious financial or personal risks at stake, the cost of an attorney is a worthy investment that could drastically increase your chances of a favorable outcome. Lawyers also know the politics and personalities involved and how to focus on the important issues. Each county and each judge can be very different and knowing the system that you are dealing with and the inclinations of the judge on the bench is absolutely vital if you want to achieve the best result possible. Ready to get started? To find the right lawyer, begin by asking family members, colleagues or friends to recommend one, or by searching through your state bar association. Your community may have a referral service to help, and your employer may offer a pre-paid legal services plan that you can join. Legal clinics, which typically center on standard services like wills and traffic offenses, may charge less than traditional law firms for services. While you may have a right to free legal representation in certain criminal cases, you do not have a right to a lawyer free of charge in civil matters. However, there are legal assistance programs offering inexpensive or free legal services to those in need, though there are usually strict guidelines for eligibility, such as military status. In the popular 50s television program that bore his name, L.A. criminal defense lawyer Perry Mason relentlessly targeted and interrogated the real guilty parties to free his falsely accused clients. Out of almost 300 cases, Mason lost only three, and he got one of those reversed on appeal. Many people thought that he was a real person and called California law firms trying to hire him. Mason is a fictional character, but when life puts you in difficult and challenging situations involving the law, you can similarly find an experienced lawyer of your own who helps their clients address and successfully handle them. Show some love for lawyers and get an expert in your corner. •


Gardening

The Valentine Rose I have a confession—I have never been a big fan of Valentine’s Day. The realist in me always saw it as an overly commercialized day full of hype to boost candy, card, and flower sales. Sure, it’s nice to get flowers on Valentine’s day, especially when everyone around you is getting them, but I am one who appreciates the unexpected. How about flowers, just because day? Now that would be special and memorable. With that confession aside, here’s a look at the history of the day and it’s gift of choice, the rose.

The rose is believed to have been the flower of choice for Venus, the Goddess of Love. The red rose, specifically, stands for strong romantic feelings. Wherever the roots of the day were planted, it’s a tradition with some mind boggling statistics. I have compiled a list of fun facts. My list of sources includes the U.S. Census Bureau and the U.S. Customs and Border Protection. Valentine’s Day may be just one day, but the numbers will tell you it’s big business around the world for flower producers. • The majority of flower buyers on Valentine’s day are men, although one study found that 15% of women in the United States will send themselves flowers on this day. • California produces 60% of American roses. • The majority of cut flower shipments are imported from South America. Colombia leads with 536 million stems (67%). Ecuador is a distant second with 194 million stems (23%). • U.S. ports of entry for shipments of imported cut flower imports: Miami and Los Angeles. • The top cut flower imports are Roses, mixed bouquets, and Dianthus. • More than 200 million roses are sold in the U.S. during an average year.

The origins of Valentine’s Day are about as reliable as a garden’s productivity on any given year. There are theories. The tie between mid-February and love dates back to a pagan fertility festival. It has been said that the day was derived from the namesake of a 5th century priest named Valentine, who defied his ruler and still performed marriages for young men during a time when it was prohibited. It was believed focused soldiers were needed without the temptation of love, therefore they should not wed. Valentine was sentenced to death on February 14th. Prior to his fate he fell in love with the jailer’s daughter and sent her a declaration of his love and signed it “from your Valentine.” Other theorists believed February 14th was the beginning of the mating season for many birds. Love was in the air.

My most memorable Valentine’s Day was my freshman year in college. My 19-year old boyfriend “WOWed” me with a dozen red roses, a box of chocolates, a bottle of Dom Perignon and two Baccarat crystal champagne flutes. Memorable alright, but I dare say my young suitor was simply out to make a flashy impression based on how much money he spent. Little did he know I am a fan of affordable mixed bouquets. Flowers are nature’s loving gift to us all and food for our soul. I suggest they adorn your desk to be enjoyed all year long. by Michelle Rauch Gardening Enthusiast

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TOPS IN EQUINE

Filly of the Month: Lynn Pedigo design and interior deSsigntructural aren’t usually a pair of talents for one person to have, but Lynn Pedigo has both. She can plan houses from the outside in, with an eye for the details of space planning as they relate to the structural aspect. Horse barns are houses, too. Pedigo has served on the Kentucky Horse Park Foundation’s board of directors since 2008 and was involved in the barn-building process at the Horse Park for the 2010 World Equestrian Games. She made sure the cupolas were in scale with the barns, for example, and that other exterior and interior details were correct. Three of the four barns have been built. “Eventually they’ll be connected with an overhead roofed walkway to get the horses from the barns to Alltech Arena,” she said. The barns are 128 feet by 185 feet. Each can hold 112 stalls. “We designed the barn so the stalls are not permanent,” she said. The stalls can be assembled in any configuration– or no stalls at all so a barn can be used as a riding ring or as an event venue.”

By Kathie Stamps

Pedigo has worked on projects with quite a few horse farms in the Bluegrass, including Bluewater Farm, Idle Hour Farm, Mt. Brilliant Farm, Patchen Wilkes Farm, Pine Knoll Farm and Summer Place Farm. She won a silver award in 2013 from Qualified Remodeler magazine’s national competition for a wholehouse remodel she did for Patchen Wilkes Farm. She has also designed for clients in Chicago and California, aw well as in Fort Lauderdale and Bal Harbor, Florida. She also designed the house that Coach Calipari bought. When Garry Milton purchased the double lot on Richmond Road, he and his wife called Pedigo. “I sketched something out, an Italianate style,” she said. “They fell in love with it.” She drew the design for the house plans and helped the couple get the finishes done. They sold the house a year or two later, and that’s when the Caliparis moved to town and bought it. Pedigo was having lunch at Dudley’s one day, and John and Ellen Calipari were sitting nearby. At her friend’s urging, she stopped by their table to say she had drawn the plans

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A native of Glasgow, Kentucky, Pedigo went to UK, where she majored in Interior Design (after taking Political Science courses and flirting with the idea of becoming an attorney). She graduated in 1987 and stayed in Lexington, as so many do. Then she went to work for Cravens & Associates. “I fell in love with the architecture stuff,” she said. “I drew all of his projects for him, with his oversight.” In 1990 she started her own company, Pedigo Design, making her business 25 years old this year. She is certified by NCIDQ, the National Council for Interior Design Qualification.

semester she keeps an intern or two busy, always from the University of Kentucky College of Design. “I pay them and they get credit,” she said. Pedigo Design started 2015 with 23 projects in various stages of progress.

TOPS IN EQUINE

for the house they bought. “He shook my hand and said thank you,” Pedigo recalled. “I said, if there’s anything about your house you would change, what would it be? He said, there’s not enough closets, and laughed. I said, there’s never enough closets.”

When clients meet with her before they have a builder in mind, Pedigo puts together a package with drawings and specifications for lighting fixtures, flooring, paints and appliances, and sends the package out for bid. “I try to think of three builders,” she said, “and match personalities with the client.” When she is drawing plans, she meets with people in their current house to see the art they like and their day-to-day living style. “When I’m drawing, I’m thinking about the type of people they are and the way they like to live,” she said. “When when they speak to you about what they want, if you’re listening you get it.”

There are certain homes in In the early days, she handed Chevy Chase with facelifts that out a brochure to new-home Pedigo Design had a hand in. builders at job sites, in subdivi“My dormers are something sions like Hartland and Dogthat people notice,” she said. “It Lynn Pedigo (Pictures by Keni Parks) wood Trace. She drew home has to be the right scale and the plans for Mac Crawford and othright proportion to the house.” er builders. Over the years, her list of builder clients has included Atchison Heller, Padgett Construction, LCM Management, Bob She loves to cook and does her own home canning. Her knowledge of the culinary arts helps Pedigo design kitchens for cooking pros. Myers and Phase IV Contractors. She’ll often create zones for one cook or two, and for congregating AutoCAD wasn’t around yet when Pedigo started out, so her hand- guests... or a very different design for those who don’t know their drawing skills were meticulous–and still are! She makes sure every way around an oven. “If someone’s not a cook, you want to design a detail is correct in the line weights: the closest lines are dark, while kitchen to help them, not make it more difficult,” she said. “It needs lines in the background are lighter to show distance. to be convenient.” She chose not to learn computer-aided design software. “I was When she’s not at her drafting table in downtown Lexington, Pedialready well-established by the time that rolled in,” she said. “Ev- go enjoys spending weekends in the country with a friend on his erybody likes hand drawings. It hasn’t hindered me.” She scans her Thoroughbred horse farm. She grew up on a beef and dairy cattle drawings and emails them to clients. She has a full-time interior farm in Glasgow, so she’s quite comfortable living off the land. “You designer on staff, Ben Deaton, who helps manage job sites and han- can’t take the farm girl out of me,” she said. dles a lot of the furniture, drapery and other design aspects. Each

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TOPS IN EQUINE trainers as well as up-and-comers. Each competitor employs their own techniques and training methodology, but all make a lasting connection with their horse. The collection of untouched geldings hailing from Texas are released into the arena, and their innate beauty is a striking sight to behold of gleaming coats, flowing manes and flashing tails. Each horse is then paired with a trainer, and the metamorphosis begins. These 3-year-old colts are transformed almost as is by magic into responsive, well-behaved horses by the guiding hands of their trainers under the watchful eye of the crowd over the course of three days. With a final test at the end of the competition, the competitors are judged not only on their display of skill, but HOW they achieved their results. The enormous effort required to present an event of this caliber every year is the price that Tootie and her colleagues willingly pay to bring the dream to life. Their approach has, in effect, carved out a unique niche in the highly competitive world of horse training that is termed “colt-starting” in this event’s vernacular. The stories of the sweat, grunge, heavy hauling, and just plain old hard work of the people responsible for this competition are just

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part and parcel of it, the makings of memories. The humble beginnings of yesteryear as compared to the current extravaganza is a testament to the perseverance and dedication to a group of people invested in a philosophy that promotes the understanding of the horse’s ways. ALL ABOUT THE HORSES One of the most well-known Quarter Horse ranches in the United States, 6666 Ranch has been recognized as an AQHA AllTime Leading Breeder of Performance Horses. As a partner with Road to the Horse, each competitor hand picks the horse of their choosing to work with throughout the competition. 6666 Ranch keeps many of the horses for work on the ranch, and the geldings that are selected for the Road to the Horse are horses that have the potential to be a part of the “cowboy string” at the Four Sixes Ranch. This string helps manage the cow operation that involves thousands of calves and is a huge part of the Ranch’s operation. The powerful presence of horses has always been an integral part of Road to the Horse. These creatures have played a pivotal role.


TOPS IN EQUINE

2011 - Pat Parelli, Chris Cox, Clinton Anderson

horses and broodmares. “Each year the final portion of the auction is reserved for our Spotlight edition. This is a group of show horses that have achieved exceptional success in the show ring. Over the years the Spotlight edition has offered many World Grand Champions and Reserve World Grand Champions. It provides a unique opportunity to purchase some of the most accomplished and capable horses in our industry.”

2012 International:

www.horsesaleslp.com

Committed to the vision of The Road to the Horse and its’ longterm success, Tootie Bland is a dreamer that knows how to make them come true. PAST WINNERS OF ROAD TO THE HORSE

1. Team Australia - Guy McLean & Dan James 2. Tean Canada - Jonathan Field & Glenn Stewart

H’ARTFUL OF FUN

3. Team USA - Craig Cameron & Pat Parelli

Friday, February 6, 2015 - 7:00pm to 11:00pm

2013 - Dan James, Sarah Winters, Guy McLean, Obbie Schlom

Alltech Arena

2014 - Jim Anderson, Antoine Cloux, Jonathan Field, Dan Steers

Living Arts & Science Center

Horse Park Calendar of Events

“An annual fundraiser, celebrating its 25th anniversary, H’Artful of Fun supports the creative and educational arts and science programs provided by the Living Arts & Science Center for over 40,000 Central Kentuckians each year.

THE KENTUCKY AFTER CHRISTMAS SALE Friday, February 6, 2015 - 10:00am to Saturday, February 7, 2015 - 5:00pm Alltech Arena Horse Sales, L.P. and The Kentucky After Christmas Sale, Inc. The 2015 edition of The Kentucky After Christmas Sale will be the 30th consecutive year that this sale has been in operation and the first event of the Tennessee Walking Horse industry season. During the sale, a large selection of Tennessee Walking horses are available for purchase from pleasure and trail horses to show

This year’s H’Artful of Fun event will be held at the Alltech Arena Exposition Center at the Kentucky Horse Park on Friday, February 6, 2015 at 7 p.m. From feathers to sequins, from bright colors to lively entertainment, the LASC’s “A Night in Rio” will set the stage for a fun-filled, unique evening of fabulous entertainment, delicious appetizers and desserts, wine, beer, bourbon tastings, and incredible art.” info@lasclex.org www.lasclex.org/index.php/events/hartful

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Fashion

Loving Leggings

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photos by Kristin Tatem

e are well into the chilly weather meaning we are well over the chilly weather, am I right? I was chatting with some girlfriends and we’ve pretty much all decided we are all done with dressing for these frigid temps. Sadly, however, us gals still have to look presentable but just really aren’t in the mood for trying to get all creative with our winter wear. So I have a solution, ladies. Leggings. Oh they’re so darn good, they’re so versatile, they’re so affordable, and they’re everywhere. Let’s break it down, shall we? Sequin Leggings One would think these are only for New Year’s Eve but I tend to disagree. I see no problem sporting these sparkles year round. And with Valentine’s Day right around the corner—how fun to toss on for a little dinner for two be it with your beau or your best girlfriend. Little tip to downplay the shine—sport them with some sneaks and the look will instantly become more casual. “Leather” Leggings Any by leather I mean faux. If there is one legging to own, these would be it. They go with just about everything. Chunky knits, button down blouses, ponchos, anorak jackets, heels, flats, sneaks, you name it, these guys will complement tons in your wardrobe. And bonus, ladies, they’re super slimming and slenderize your figure! Cotton Leggings These are by far the most comfy of the three in addition to being the most casual. These are kicked up a notch with the tuxedo stripe down the side which adds a fun graphic element. Like the leathers, these guys will go with everything. How about tossing them on with an over the knee boot? They’re equal parts comfortable and diverse. While I would love to say we only have a month or so more of the chill, something tells me it’s here to stay for a bit. Make getting dressed in the morning easier (and more stylish) by upping your legging game. Remember, add elements of detail, be it stripe or sequin; toss on sneaks instead of heels, or try a textured ‘leather’ pair. Either way you go, I guarantee you’ll feel comfy and polished…and WARM!

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by Beth Parker Fashion Blogger/Stylist seersuckerandsaddles.blogspot.com


Tour of Homes

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rom the foyer, we take the center stairway up a half level and into a multi-purpose office and lounge. Mullins placed a working desk in front of the room’s broad arching window, which is dressed in sweeping crimson curtains. Mullins notes this room is also used for family time, as evident by the large caramel couch and herringbone print tufted ottoman included in the heart of the space To the right of the foyer, I’m amused by a slender French door, which opens to a library resembling Old World Europe. The enchanting room is decorated with a coffered ceiling and sliding ladders that skim across walls of wood custom-built shelves. The room feels like it belongs in another place and time, but serves a practical use for the homeowner today.

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Tour of Homes

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eturning to the foyer, we progress toward the center of the first floor, passing through an elaborate Venetian archway that introduces a sophisticated dining room. The elevated ceiling with two layers of molding is highlighted by a contrasting ceiling tone. The dining room is complete with a sleek 10-seat dining table, a front window trimmed in silk black and white printed curtains and a gold-trimmed imported black buffet. Past the dining room, the natural flow of the home leads to an open area exposing a series of Venetian style columns setting off the living room. At the core of the open area, and adjacent to the living room, a glassencased wine cellar holds a thousand bottles of wine collected by Mullins. At this point in the tour, we step down from the hardwood onto the beige carpet of the living room. The formality of the space is emphasized by the coffered ceiling and faux finished sage walls, which are trimmed in white railing. It’s impossible to overlook the massive cast stone fireplace, which was imported from Mexico. A bronze sectional couch and two Victorian style upholstered sitting chairs complete the living room.

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Tour of Homes

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ar walls of the kitchen are assembled with cream cabinetry finished with elaborate molding. Matching corner cabinet sections with glass facings are incorporated for china display. A pair of oversized, dramatic bronze chandeliers hover over an 18-foot, two-tiered granite countertop, complemented by stools upholstered in an olive iKat print. On the right side of the room, a section of the granite workspace provides a view out to the property.

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Tour of Homes

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“It’s really nice having a glass of wine while looking over the pool”

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urning the corner back toward the great room, Mullins gestures toward a light and refreshing sunroom soaking up natural light and warmth through two walls of glass panels with sliding doors, which open to the upper level deck. In warm weather, the room serves as a transitional area guiding guests toward the lavish outdoor settings. The sunroom continues the home’s theme of detaildriven refinement with its quatrefoil print accent wall and four comfortable linen sitting chairs. The porcelain tile extends from the sunroom onto the outside deck, which is furnished with a set of lounge chairs tossed with pillows matching the wall print from the indoor section.


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Celebrate Your Little Ones

ebruary is a sweet time of the year to celebrate your youngest loved ones. Valentine’s Day doesn’t have to mean just roses and boxes of chocolate. Break up the dreary, cold winter months with some fun, love inspired activities for your children. The following ideas will help make your February full of many hugs and kisses. Love Messages You can tell your kids how much you love them with a simple daily message. This is a great activity to do, even for your teenagers. Every child loves to hear what makes them special, even if they do not admit it. At the beginning of February, cut out 14 paper hearts and write something you love about your child on each one of the hearts. Starting on February 1st, tape one heart to your child’s door in the morning

before they wake up each day until Valentine’s Day. It’s a simple way to start the day with a reminder of your love. A Sweet Treat A White Chocolate Strawberry S’mores Parfait is super simple to whip up for a Valentine’s snack or Valentine’s dessert. Both kids and adults will enjoy the flavor combination of strawberries coupled with white chocolate. If you use skim milk, it’s a pretty light dessert, making it an indulgence you can feel good about! To make the dessert, mix 2 cups of cold milk and 1 package of white chocolate instant pudding mix according to package directions. Chill pudding for about one hour. Crush approximately 4-5 graham crackers. Place graham crackers in bottom of four small dishes, dividing equally. Roughly chop 1 cup of strawberries Top graham crackers with strawberries. Cover strawberries with prepared pudding. Top with plain or toasted heart shaped marshmallows. Showing Love to Others Valentine’s Day can be a time to encourage your kids to perform little acts of love for their loved ones or others. To help out loved ones, kids could do a chore for their sibling or grandparents. If you have family or loved ones that live out of town, kids could mail a hug to that person. To mail a hug, have kids trace each of their hands onto construction paper and cut them out. Cut a piece of ribbon about 36 inches long and staple or glue the hands to each end of the ribbon. Write a little message of love to the recipient on the hands. Small acts of kindness for are a great way to introduce service for others. A few simple ideas include handing out boxes of conversation hearts to grocery store cashiers, post office employees, and other workers, while out running errands; taping a couple of dollars to a movie rental machine so someone can enjoy a free movie; or write a note of encouragement to a classmate, friend or someone who might need a little lift. Making Valentines Encourage your child’s inner artist in the days leading up to Valentine’s Day. Instead of purchasing Valentine’s Cards, have children make cards using art materials you have on hand. Materials such as construction paper, paper doilies, fabric scraps, ribbon, paint, buttons and stickers can all be used to make Valentines. Set out supplies and let kids have free reign to design their own masterpiece. Kids will love having the freedom to create a Valentine and you’ll be by Deanna Talwalkar surprised with their creativity. Party Planner Extraordinaire

Photo & Styling by Mirabelle Creations

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Family

Love Languages for Grownups Because, you know, adult life happens. There once was a young, hopeful ‘Me’, enamored with romantic notions of husbands who came home with flowers and sparkly keepsakes for special occasions. Mature ‘Me’ has come to terms with reality, and it involves budgets and necessities. Instead of flowers and jewelry, there are vacuums. And yard tools. And new tires for the car. And the occasional sick pet. I certainly don’t mind when my husband shows up with superfluous tokens of affection, but I’m here to tell you: there is some true romance involved in the nitty gritty of every day life.

A wise friend warned me, once you set up housekeeping; you see departments in Sears you never knew existed. That friend was right. And the crazy thing is, my husband and I find ourselves walking hand-in-hand into these places, listening intently to customer associates explain the difference between the base and deluxe models of a power tool, or show us the features of newer appliances. Here’s the thing—in grown-up love language, buying the deluxe power tools screams, “I love you.” And let me ask: Is there anything more attractive than a man who just got a great deal on a new kitchen appliance? Our marriage works well because we own our portions of the reality bargain. It is quite romantic in a mature sort of way. Home improvement speaks to me, which means my husband never has to purchase sheets or towels, or select paint colors. Our mar-

riage survived a joint effort at wallpaper installation very early on, which led to an immediate “never again” resolution. (There are some things we bear alone as an expression of love. Wallpaper is certainly one.) And here is the best part for me—nothing speaks to my husband quite like a trip to a warehouse store. Because there is no place I would rather NOT be. The massiveness of such places overwhelms my introverted self, but his inner shopper shines bright. He loves that it’s big. The store is big. The products are big. The shopping carts are big. And sometimes he needs two of those big shopping carts to stock our home with the necessities. He combs the aisles for big savings.

And I love that he goes. I love that we have a six-month supply of toilet paper. I love that we have enough zip-lock bags to pack all our belongings should we suddenly need to move. I love that I didn’t have to push a 200-pound cart full of 124-ounce cans of tomatoes through the mile-long maze that is the warehouse superstore. And when he comes home and unloads all those great big packages, I love him! Now, if we can just figure out who speaks the language of cleaning up after pets, I think we can live happily ever after.

by Hallie Bandy

over

Motherboard

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If your new year’s resolution was to rekindle some romance, maybe it’s time to rethink your love language. And your budget.

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Relationships

Comfortable Silence

I remember my first romantic date with Mister Man like it was yes-

terday. I teased my hair making it extra large, put on a sassy little red dress, stuffed my bra with a pair of running socks and treated myself to a new set of acrylic nails. I must have looked like Dolly Parton, looking back in retrospect. But he didn’t seem to mind. Mister Man picked me up right on time and escorted me to a lovely little French restaurant downtown. I ordered a glass of red wine and he opted for a bourbon and coke. The candle in the center of the table provided the perfect glow as we gazed into each other’s eyes. Conversation flowed freely and I was pleased beyond words with his fantastic sense of humor. Sitting at a table beside us was an older couple. They were dressed sharply and it looked as if the woman spent as much time getting ready as I had. Although I was fairly certain she didn’t spring for the running socks. She, too, was drinking a glass of red wine and her husband appeared to be sipping on a scotch and rocks. I did note that for the entire hour two hours that we sat side by side, the couple barely spoke. They didn’t look angry or frustrated; it just appeared that they had nothing to say. Based upon their ages, it was entirely possible that they had been together for fifty plus years. Quite an accomplishment! But I was certainly taken by the lack of conversation. They did look at one another sweetly and when she stood to go to the power room he pulled her chair out and tucked it back in upon her return. But why didn’t they speak I wondered? The after dinner coffee finally broke their silence. “Excellent coffee,” uttered the woman. “I was thinking the same thing.” replied the man. And that was it. Perhaps years of life together, took away the words. Perhaps they simply knew each other so well that little was left to say. Was this a good thing or bad I pondered? Mister Man and I have been together exclusive since that first date. A few months back he took me to the same little French restaurant for the first time in many years. My hair was not quite as tall as it had been that first evening and I opted for a nice shirt and jeans. Needless to say,

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I left the running socks in the drawer where they belonged. I ordered a red wine and he chose iced tea. The food was just as good as I remembered. Half way through our fabulous dinner something very alarming occurred to me. Our conversation was quite sparse. Particularly compared to the young couple sitting beside us who were talking a mile per minute. They were clearly fascinated by each other and information could not come fast enough. At first I felt envious and downright concerned. But it also occurred to me that I felt strangely comfortable with the silence. Perhaps just being in the company of the man who knew me better than anybody was enough. It felt peaceful, safe and actually refreshing. With incredibly busy schedules, meetings, and phone calls, I realized that sometimes the closest you can feel to someone is in silence. I pointed out the young couple to Mister Man. “Do you remember when that was us?” I asked. “Do you miss those days?” “Sometimes, I suppose.” he replied. He continued,”It was like having a beautiful present that was to be carefully unwrapped.” “Does anything in particular stand out to you about that night?” I asked. Mister Man began laughing. Literally almost snorting with laughter. “What!!” I sharply replied. “What is so funny!” He finally gained his composure. “The socks.” “Huh?” I had forgotten about the running socks. “Well, one of them was…uhhhh, peaking out all evening.” I was mortified. We both laughed for the duration of the dinner, reminiscing the early days of our relationship. Although the newness had worn off, it was replaced by something that I wouldn’t trade for anything. Time. We were on our way to earning what that sweet old couple had. Perhaps another forty years down the road we might not even need the words. We would just know. And I was determined to embrace each moment of conversation, laughter…and silence.

by Buffy Lawson Relationship Veteran


Weddings

‘Something New’ and a Silver Sixpence for Your Shoe, Too!

W

hen embracing the “Something Old, Something New” theme in your wedding plans, there are two elements that tend to get brushed aside by the bride. First, many just default to their wedding gown as their “Something New”. Of course it is, but take that one step further to make “Something New” something special. Second, most brides don’t realize that the saying completes with “…and a silver Sixpence in her shoe”! The sixpence is a good luck token representing wealth and financial security, even if it was originally just worth six cents. Feature Your New Initials for Something New To add thoughtfulness to your “Something New” with your wedding gown, have your new initials embroidered inside your wedding dress. Depending on your dress, it may be easier to do it at the hem, and this way you can show it to friends and family during the reception. My favorite place for this is just inside the back closure, or in the front near your heart. Go ahead and have it embroidered in blue for double good luck. Debut Your New Initials at the Reception To show off your “Something New” initials to all your guests, incorporate it into your reception décor, from a bright light display with gobo lights, to monogrammed napkins. I love glasses etched with your new initials, and to keep that budget in mind, have them made for just the wedding party, or the two of you. The Silver Sixpence You can’t just pick up a sixpence anywhere, but they are readily available on the web and on eBay. Here is an important hint for the sixpence in your shoe. Place it in your shoe under the arch of your foot where it will bother you the least. Under the ball of your foot or heel has the potential to make walking and dancing miserable after a couple hours. Or after you walk down the aisle, take it out and put it in your new husband’s pocket. You can also super glue it on the sole of your shoe in the rise near the heel, which opens up the possibility for a very cute photo. Take the Sixpence Beyond Your Shoe

by Marsha Koller Wedding Consultant

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Your sixpence doesn’t have to be a shoe-in. Drill a hole in a sixpence and loop it into your bouquet, then you can wear it as a pendant later on. Ready made silver sixpence pendants and necklaces are

FEBRUARY 2015 | TOPSINLEX.COM

available online, and through artisans on Etsy. You are Your Something New A wedding is an important rite of passage, and gives you a point of reference to begin anew. All eyes will be on you, a new ‘Mrs.’ if you are old fashioned—oh, that’s ‘Something Old’ too!


Lex In The City

Even though the show is all about the tremendous work of the film industry, we are just as excited about the red carpet. Fashion and the Oscars have always gone hand in hand. Some of the most memorable gowns in history floated down the Academy carpet and we are certain this year will be no different. While we will miss Ellen and her record breaking selfie skills this year, ‘Gone Girl’ star Neil Patrick Harris is taking over hosting duties on February 22 nd on ABC. With his talent and charm we are no doubt in for an entertaining three hours.

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Lex In The City

Every February and September, fashion designers are scurrying about putting together their ready to wear collections. New York, London, and Milan will all show their Fall 2015 best starting on the 12th, with the undeniably chic Paris following shortly after in March. This will mark the first season in New York that Peter Copping will show his efforts as creative director for the late and unforgettable Oscar de la Renta. Copping left the elegant house of Nina Ricci last fall and has some very big shoes to fill. As for the runway, you can plan on seeing even more of model “it� girls like Gigi Hadid, Karlie Kloss, and Kendall Jenner strutting their stuff. We are mostly looking forward to what trends will be all the rage for Fall. Will it be bold colors? Fringe? Capes? Check out our fashion week coverage online throughout February to find out.

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Save the Date

Wags and Drags to benefit the Scott County Humane Society 6p-10 The Grand Reserve

26 Thursday

27 Tuesday

LIVE MUSIC

ENTERTAINMENT

Gregory Porter 7:30p EKU Center for the Arts

Specialty Store Sale Spectacular! 9:30a-4:30p Oleika Shrine Temple

42nd Street 7p Lexington Opera House

Cameron Carpenter 8p Norton Center

Walk for Warmth 10a-12p Phoenix Park

THEATRE

7 SATURDAY

Peter and the Star Catcher 2p & 8p Lexington Opera House

7 SATURDAY

12 Thursday

Hanfu Fashion, Dance and Ancient Music 7:30p-8:30p Singletary Center

Lexington Old-Time Music Gathering 7p ArtsPlace

19 THURSDAY

13 Friday

The 39 Steps 7:30p UK Guignol Theatre

21 FRIDAY

I Love Lucy Live! 8p Norton Center

22 Sunday

Chuggington Live! The Great Rescue Adventure 2p Lexington Opera House Se単ora Tortuga 2p & 4:30p EKU Center for the Arts

Sundy Best 8p Lexington Opera House Tchaikovsky & Crouching Tiger 7:30p Singletary Center

17 Tuesday

RAINN: A Tribute to The Beatles 7:30p Lexington Opera House

21 SATURDAY

Lexington Philharmonic PB&J 10a Aviation Museum of Kentucky

24 Tuesday

7 SATURDAY

Kentucky Sport, Boat & Recreation Show Lexington Center The Kentucky After Christmas Sale Kentucky Horse Park

8 SUNDAY

Kentucky Sport, Boat & Recreation Show Lexington Center

11 Wednesday

Alton Brown Live: Edible Inevitable Tour 7:30p EKU Center for the Arts Greg Morton 7:15p Comedy Off Broadway

18 Wednesday

The Price is Right: LIVE 7:30p EKU Center for the Arts

The Hot Sardines 7:30p EKU Center for the Arts

206

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Save the Date

Guy Torry 7:15p Comedy Off Broadway

21 Saturday

Jim Gaffigan 8:30p Singletary Center

11 WEDNESDAY

14 Saturday

12 Thursday

15 SUNDAY

The Artist’s Way: Nurturing Our Creative Life 6p Joseph-Bell Booksellers

An Evening with Ben Carson 7:30p-9p Norton Center for the Arts

22 SUNDAY

CKYO Teen Arts Concert 7p Singletary Center

14 Saturday

Chinese New Year Celebration 4:30p-9p Lexington Opera House

27 Friday

GLAA Las Vegas Night 6p-10p Marriott Griffin Gate New Home and Remodeling Marketplace 4p Kentucky Horse Park

26 Thursday

Henry Cho 7:15p Comedy Off Broadway

18 Wednesday

Black History Convocation 10a-12p Lyric Theatre

SPORTS

7 SATURDAY

Snowball Series Mounted Games Kentucky Horse Park

28 SATURDAY

Kodo 7:30p EKU Center for the Arts

8 SUNDAY

Snowball Series Mounted Games Kentucky Horse Park

LEARNING 10 tuesday

Bale Boone Symposium: Legacies of the American Civil War 7p UK William T. Young Library

10 tuesday

UK Men’s Basketball v LSU 7p AWAY

[ Visit TopsInLex.com for our full calendar ]

UK Men’s Basketball vs South Carolina 2p Rupp Arena

AKC Dog Test and Dog Tracking Dog Excellence Test 8a-4p Kentucky Horse Park

17 Tuesday

UK Men’s Basketball vs Tennessee 7p AWAY

21 Saturday

UK Men’s Basketball v Auburn 6p Rupp Arena KHSAA State Wrestling Championshop Kentucky Horse Park

25 Wednesday

UK Men’s Basketball v Mississippi State 4p AWAY

28 Saturday

UK Men’s Basketball v Arkansas 4p Rupp Arena Snowbird Dressage Kentucky Horse Park

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TOPS In Lexington Magazine February 2015  

The Money Issue! Check out the great features along with tons of photos from recent events and more.

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