Aug_ZebraInk

Letter From The Editor

Welcome to the Dazzle!

Did you know that a group of zebras is called a dazzle? They are and that is what I will affectionately call the readers of this magazine. If you would like to learn more fun facts about why the zebra is so special, please make sure that you read the article about Why Zebras?

“If you were a successful book publisher of a small print label, why would you switch to a digital magazine?”

That is a question I get asked often these days. I have loved being a publisher of books, but it takes a long time for each one to be ready. It also means sharing one story at a time. There is nothing wrong with that and the stories I have been honored to help bring to life mean something deeply to me. I wouldn’t change any of them or the countless other people I have edited for, created marketing plans for, had events for, etc. It has been the most rewarding time of my life.

Here is the thing. I feel called to change for three reasons. The first reason is because I want to be able to share more stories and I have maxed out my capacity to do them faster. I could hire lots of editors, formatters, and designers, but then I would be just a cog in the wheel, and I don’t really want that. I like the personal connection I have to all of the authors, and I truly don’t want to lose that. So, in order to tell more stories, I need to create a new format.

Secondly, selling books can be tough for authors. I recognized years ago, before I even became an author myself, that one of the best ways to grow an audience is to get published in already established publications. I have been a newspaper and magazine columnist and know from experience that getting into publications is an excellent way to expand anyone’s reach. Many authors, artists, and entrepreneurs don’t know how to do that. I wanted to create an accessible outlet for them to be published in a magazine. It will help them grow their audience and share their stories in an easily consumable way. This is not limited to just authors though – anyone who wants to share a story can publish in this magazine.

Thirdly, STORIES ARE POWERFUL! On a very ordinary day in the middle of July, I wasn’t feeling well. I went to the Emergency Room and a few hours later, the doc said I needed

to have a very awful sounding procedure done. I said no. He left the room to let me think about it and I still wasn’t into having this procedure done. He returned later and asked me what I wanted to do. I told him I didn’t really want to. He shared with me that he had the very same procedure two years prior and hasn’t had any trouble since. He feels great and the procedure helped him. I then agreed and had the life saving procedure. Thank goodness that the doctor was willing to share his experience with me. It could even be said that his story might have saved my life.

This platform is meant to share stories that will help you connect, heal, feel empowered and maybe even save your life or that of someone you love. Just about everything in this magazine is linked so you can find out more and connect with the author. I encourage you to do that as often as you can.

I hope you enjoy this issue and feel free to share with those you know who may need to read it too.

Happy reading –

Sheila Kennedy Editor and Publisher of Zebra Ink Magazine

Why Zebras?

Well, ten years ago I started a business that adopted the zebra as its mascot. It is quite meaningful honestly. I have Shel Silverstein to thank for that.

Shortly before starting my business, I was going through a really challenging time. I felt like I was backed into the corner with a boulder coming towards me. It was a true proverbial “between a rock and a hard place” moment. I didn’t think there was anything I could do to escape. I mentioned to a friend of mine that I didn’t have any choice and was going to be smashed. He wisely reminded me that I always have a choice. At first, I refused to believe that I had a choice, but in time I realized that I did in fact have choices.

I made a different choice, and I slayed the giant instead of getting pummeled. Learning that I may not always be able to choose myself out of situation, but I would be able to choose my reaction, was THE most empowering moment of my life. No one could ever take that away from me. I knew then that I would spend my days sharing that idea and illuminating the power that each person holds inside of them.

“Zebra Question” by Shel Silverstein

A few months after that event, I read a poem by Shel Silverstein, called “Zebra Question.” As you can see, the poem is filled with questions posed as choices that the reader gets to decide. After reading the poem, I thought that using zebra print would be a perfect visual reminder that I have the power to choose. I know that visual reminders are helpful in changing habits. The one habit I am hoping others will embrace is trusting their ability to choose their reaction to whatever they encounter in life. Choices make you powerful and abundant and the zebra reminds me of that every time I see one.

Issue designed by Jackie Zimmerman, Queen of GSD

Imagine this.

DR. CHERYL COOPER

Iwas sitting across a table of city school board members and pitching an idea about how to bring STEM into the school district. Having prepared all of the relevant information and full of passion, I knew exposing students to STEM would be an introduction to what the future could hold for them. The presentation went off without a hitch. The superintendent, a fellow PhD, seemed pleased with what was said. I asked the board what their thoughts were and if I had the green light to begin implementing the outlined plan.

“Not this year. It just isn’t in the budget. We don’t have the kind of resources that would be needed to make this happen. We are sorry, but it is a no.”

As they stood up to leave the room, I felt like the floor fell out from under me. This couldn’t be happening, could it? How could they not see the benefits to this plan? The Superintendent began to pack up his things, hesitating for a moment as he looked at me with apologetic eyes. If I ever was going to shoot my shot, now was the time.

“Dr. _____, how are you doing with STEM classes in your district?”

“Well, our boys seem to be just fine. We have a variety of offerings for them, but our girls don’t have much, I am sorry to say.”

I knew that was not acceptable. How could we ever expect better futures for our girls if we didn’t show them what was possible? I asked if I planned an off-site, privately funded event for the girls in the high school to introduce them to STEM and technology, would I have his permission to plan it. He agreed. I honestly had no idea how I was going to make it work, but it was important that I try.

That was the first STEM event that I had planned and executed. Shortly after this event, I was so sad and frustrated that this wasn’t a regular part of every school district in the city. I had spent a lifetime without a mentor, from the hood of Kansas City to crossing the stage for my PhD. No one showed me what to do or how to do it. I had to fight my way through all of the “isms” that accompany being a Black woman in corporate America. While lamenting over the unfairness of it all and how unsatisfying it was that no leaders I knew would pick up the baton and run with this idea of mentoring young, underprivileged and marginalized girls, I decided it could be me. I would put my own resources into creating an organization that would mentor young girls and women about the benefits and pathways into Cybersecurity. It was on that day that the idea for Women in Security Mentors (WinS) was born.

I did what I had to do to start WinS, and that included getting other women and allies to help me produce events, raise money,

mentor, and promote educational opportunities for young women to learn more about cybersecurity and technology. There are great opportunities to rise within that industry and the entry point is truly accessible to young women. The industry is in desperate need of more women that have been marginalized in some way in society. Yes, we need women, but we especially need women who are all colors and races. The more diverse our workforce becomes, the better off we all will be.

At an event last year, sponsored by T-Mobile, we had 100+ girls from the inner city of Kansas City come to the T-Mobile campus. We treated them like they were special because they are. One of the girls at the end of the day asked if she could come back again. Another said she liked being able to talk to the women who shared their experiences and answered questions. She could see a way for a future where she hadn’t seen before.

Their responses are why I do this work. To give these girls opportunities that they never knew existed. Far too many marginalized kids are written off before they are given a chance. I want to change that. I want WinS to grow so that our girls can grow and become successful in life. I am on a mission to show them what they can be. The company I work for feels that way too. Because of the success of the Kansas City event, I was asked by my company’s leadership team to host similar events in Washington and Texas. These events resulted in over a combined 350 high school girls attending the Cyber and Technology career fest to expose them to career possibilities.

I regret that I didn’t have a mentor in my life when I was their age. I ended up in the drug culture of the inner city of Kansas City. I was married to a drug dealer and enjoyed the product far more than was good for me. To

escape that life for me and my young daughter, I chose to join the Navy. That is where I learned technology and have pursued a career in it ever since. As Dr. Cheryl Cooper, I have become as credentialed as one can get in this field. I am a Business Information Security Officer at T-Mobile, a professor, and spend my off-time volunteering for WinS and other organizations that mentor underprivileged and marginalized young women. I am a favorite cybersecurity panelist, a highly sought after speaker, and an author of my memoir, Hood to Hooded

I humbly share what I have accomplished so far because I did this without anyone showing me the way or guiding me. I worked so hard to make something of myself. I want the girls of the future to not have to work so hard to achieve even more than I have. It is possible and I hope that you will help support my efforts.

There are many ways to get involved – from sponsoring an event, to making donations at www.drcherylcooper.com for WinS, to speaking or mentoring our young people. All proceeds from my book, Hood to Hooded, are donated to WinS that help fund materials, training, and scholarships for marginalized and underprivileged girls. I ask that you help however you can.

Together we can make the future so bright for these young people. Please join me.

Dr. Cheryl Cooper is a Business Information Security Office at T-Mobile, founder of Women In Security Mentors, and author of Hood to Hooded.

To make a donation visit www. drcherylcooper.com

Mantras + Moonlight

ERIN BENSON

Mantras and Moonlight came to be in a wonderfully unexpected way. It was August 2020, and I was traveling to my hometown in the Adirondacks to be with my best friend for her father’s funeral. The world was still locked down and we were limited in what we could do or where we could go. With a week’s worth of free time, I was eager to find something to do while I was in town.

This journey really began two years prior when I started to practice yoga, and consequently was introduced to

the idea of using meditation as a tool to heal and grow. My best friend is a yogi, and has many malas filling the walls of her dressing room. On seeing them, I was immediately transported back to the visits we made to my grandmother’s home,and being dazzled by her closet filled with sparkly lavaliers.

An even greater memory arose from when I was seven years old and my favorite aunt, a total hippie, gifted me her love beads. I remembered how special I felt as she draped them around my neck.

They are a gift I treasure to this day.

I decided that afternoon in upstate NY that I would like to make a mala for myself and hoped it would make my new interest in meditation even more special and personal. The entire process was exciting and yet at the same time became a meditation in itself for me. As soon as I completed it, I knew I wanted to make more. Sharing photos of what I had made with friends, I was definitely encouraged. My friends loved it and wanted me to make them one as well.

So, on a cool evening in Upstate New York in the middle of August, Mantras + Moonlight began.

It fascinates me that I am part of an age-old ritual to adorn oneself with beautiful stones that are mystical and talismanic. I enjoy the idea that we are able to receive those energies and intentions that are embedded in a human experience that spans across all cultures and ages.

The malas I create are more than the beads that are tied together. I start off by finding stones that meet an aesthetic and a spiritual meaning sought by the subscriber. I then spend some time with those meanings and allow their intention to speak to me. When I send off the mala to its new owner it comes complete with a mantra as a result of my meditation with it and a description of the meaning of the stones used.

When I first started meditating it seemed difficult. Could I shut my mind off for any length of time? At first it was difficult, but using my mala made it much more accessible. Repeating my mantra while touching each of the 108 beads allows me to clear away whatever else is in my mind while focusing on the intention the mantra provided. It has certainly led to healing and growth, and I won’t lie, I also use it as a beautiful necklace when it suits my outfit.

Recreating the gift that my aunt gave me when she shared her love beads with me is exactly what I am trying to do with the malas from Mantras + Moonlight. I desire to share the power of the mala and spread the love imbued into each one.

Erin Benson is a social worker, plant lover and owner of Mantras + Moonlight. To see her collection of made-to-order malas or to place your own order, visit https://www.instagram.com/ mantras_and_moonlight/

Beyond! The birth of a poem.

RAY JUSTICE

“ How do you come up with so many interesting verses?”

Iwas spending some time with my close friend Maria when she asked that question.

Not having a fixed formula, I mentioned I usually have a catalyst that stirs my imagination.

“So, what does that actually mean,” she inquired.

I answered with, “give me a minute to see what comes up.”

I turned my head and looked out the large glass pane window, and as I did, four wild ducks took off from a pond about 300 or 400 feet away. They climbed upward in their flight, leaving the calm water behind. Instantly and precisely, all together in the same formation, they turned a sharp left and off they went.

It reminded me of the Blue Angles Airplanes I had seen flying in air shows. They flew in groups of four with the same exact precision. Realizing one quite large difference, the pilots have to practice and communicate with each other in another way and, with a great deal of trust.

My next thought was that the ducks have an instinctive trust with each other. I picked up my note pad and pen to write, an instinctive knowing beyond trust.

I sat down, closed my eyes, took a deep breath, waiting for my next thought with my pen in hand. I wrote, “there is an instinctive knowing beyond what others label trust.”

A couple minutes later I had written this poetic verse as a demo of how I write.

“When I am with you, physically or spiritually, it is a curious mystery. There is an instinctive knowing beyond what others label Trust.”

I titled it “Beyond” and read it to Maria with her question answered.

Several years later it is included in chapter three of my book Spiritual Arousal - A Journey into Connection.

Beyond

When I am with you, physically or spiritually, it is a curious mystery. There is an instinctive knowing beyond what others label Trust.

Inspiring writer, poet, and entrepreneur who creates products and services to stir curiosity, creativity, intuition, intimacy, and personal insights. Visit www.rayjustice.com to learn more and Ray and his new book.

Believe in yourself

BILLY THOMPSON

In the spring of 1978, Coach Ricky Locklear drove me to Elon College (now Elon University) to try out for the Football team. Despite the number of individuals who told me I was too small and not fast enough to play at the college level. Others thought I should have accepted a track scholarship from Pembroke State College (Pembroke State University) because of my jumping abilities and level of speed for running the 880 meter race. My desire was to play football.

Coach Ricky, Mr. Harvey Lowery, and Mr. Bob. Each would share stories to encourage me to not settle for track but to remember what I had accomplished and the efforts put in to being player of the week, going over 1,000 yards for the year and being named All Conference and Athlete of the year. I remembered when I sometimes didn’t have a ride home from practice or a game and I had to walk six miles in the heat or cold weather, to get home. If it was raining, my friend Charles McCallum would give me a ride home. So, with all that being said, I decided I wanted to play football.

After going through the try out process, Coach Jerry Tolley, told me that he couldn’t offer me a scholarship but since I had already been accepted at Elon, I could be a walk-on when school started. When I questioned him he said, “Well son, people down your way don’t play football; they play baseball, basketball, and run track.” I responded, “But Coach Ricky was an All American here at Elon.” Coach Tolley then responded, “Yes, but you’re not him.” My hope of getting a scholarship was over and done within 10 minutes.

I came back home and told my mother and grandmother what happened. They both told me that everything would work out. Then I reminded

them that without the scholarship, I had to come up with $750 to finish paying for college, plus any other fees that may come up. We were poor sharecroppers who didn’t have this type of money laying around. My mom told me to call one of my uncles who without a doubt could give it to me or at least loan it to me. I called my uncle. To make a long story short, he said no. I knew I couldn’t make that kind of money working on the tobacco farm so I landed a job at South of The Border, a local tourist attraction. On the days I wasn’t working at the Border, I worked in the tobacco field.

One day I came home from working in the tobacco field and my grandmother told me that my coach called and wanted me to give him a call back. I dialed the number, wondering what he could want since it was the second week of August and I wasn’t to report to college until the last week of August. The phone rang and he answered with, “Hello Coach Tolley speaking.” I replied, “Hello Coach. This is Billy Thompson. My grandmother gave me this number to call you.” “Yes son, where in the sand hills are you? You were supposed to be here last week and you need to get up here today.” I replied, “But Coach, you told me not to come to summer practice, just to wait until it was time for me to report to school like other students.” Coach Tolley exclaimed, “Son I don’t know what caused you to think that but you need to get here ASAP!”

That created another problem. I had managed to save most of the money I needed to finish paying for my tuition and my mama was able to give me the rest. I had the money, but no way to get to Elon. It was three o’clock on a Monday afternoon and we didn’t even own a car. I started calling family members to see if someone could drive me and couldn’t find a soul who was willing to drive me there. Then I called my last uncle’s house and my cousin’s boyfriend just happened to be there. He was a recent graduate of NC A & T State University and told me he knew where Elon was and would even drive me there if I had gas money.

We went to the dorm Coach Tolley said for me to go to. I went to the door and knocked for what seemed like forever. Finally, this grumpy guy who must have been asleep like everyone else, opened the door and said, “Follow me.” I followed him up to the second floor where he showed me my room. He gave me the key and walked back down the steps grumbling. I went into the room, locked the door, fell on the bed and was out like a light. No sooner than I had gone to sleep, I was awakened by a bullhorn and someone banging trash can lids together. Someone knocked on my door, I opened the door and the same grumpy man who let me in was standing in front of me. He said “Put some shorts and a t-shirt on and get downstairs.” As I was leaving my room a young man about my age came and said, “Follow me, Thompson. We need to get all your

equipment before you go out there with the rest of the team.” Later, I found out he was the assistant equipment manager and was also from Robeson County. He gave me my uniform and all the equipment.

I earned a scholarship my second year and gained a starting position as a defensive back. We won two NAIA National Championship 1980 and 1981. Look at all I accomplished despite being told I couldn’t. There were several obstacles in my way, but I didn’t lose faith that I could make my desire come true. I was encouraged by a few to go for it. I believed I could do it and I did!

I have never lost sight of this truth in all of my years. I wanted to be in education. I started out as a substitute teacher and retired as a principal. Same thing with being published. I have always wanted to be published and now I have my first magazine article. Believe in yourself and all will be well.

Billy Thompson is a human being who believes in supporting, loving and caring for others. He is a graduate of Elon College and believer in life-long learning. Connect with Billy on Facebook.

Decision Day

LEAH LEVERICH

Imagine going to school on Decision Day without any sense of direction and wearing normal clothes while everyone else has on college merchandise. No one goes out of their way to be an outcast, especially not in high school. It’s a very isolating feeling that I’m determined to prevent future students from experiencing. Why is it that we let this “traditional path” dictate our level of success after high school? It’s become more apparent that the “one-size fits all” mentality is not realistic… So why do we apply it to the college path?

I’ve never been the type of person who looked forward to college. There is a culture around what the college experience is supposed to be like, and that it’s just a period of time during everyone’s life. That’s a very expensive period of time! There is no way that sacrifice is worth it for everyone. I’m living proof.

I started a homemade bath bomb business called Bath Bombs For Charity (BBFC) when I was 12 for my school’s National Junior Honor Society program. Using this entrepreneurial spirit, I would make bath bombs, sell them door to door, and give the profit to local charities such as Best Buddies NY, Resolve of Greater Rochester and Grace’s Garden at the Golisano Children’s Hospital. I loved the feeling of giving back to charity while also creating a product that made people smile. With this endeavor in the back of my mind, college was already seeming a bit unnecessary for me. Knowing that I had this love for entrepreneurship, I couldn’t imagine what college could provide me that I couldn’t also get by networking and being involved in the real world. I’m not saying college is pointless, of course it is required for people interested in certain careers. However, studies show that 41% of recent college graduates end up in careers that don’t require college degrees and 1 in 10 students change their majors more than once. This made me extremely curious about the current expectations in our society. Why is it that college is the obvious next step? What about people going into the military or the trades or starting a business? The list goes on. I believe those paths deserve tons of recognition too!

While I didn’t end up going to college right after high school, I’ll never say never. I might decide to go back and further my education down the line if I feel it could help me. I reminisce on the times I job shadowed architects, physical therapists, dermatologists, broadcasters and interior designers… none of it felt right for me. So, following my gut and taking the non-traditional path took loads of bravery. During my senior year of high school, I met an entrepreneur named Brandon T. Adams. He offered me advice on the bath bomb business and provided me with the opportunity of a paid internship. I started by posting on his social media, which then led to attending events, networking with successful entrepreneurs, keynote speakers, investors and even a shark from the hit TV show Shark Tank! My mind was opened to

a whole world of career possibilities I barely knew existed. As I talked to successful people and gained their perspective on college, my decision was clear. One connection I made had opened the door to an infinite number of opportunities. By graduation day in June of 2022, I had decided to jump right into the workforce, and as of right now, have worked with Brandon to gain the title of Multimedia and Video Production Manager as well as Assistant Event Coordinator for the annual Rise & Record event at only 18 years old!!!

This path feels so right for me, and I never would have found it if I didn’t have the courage to break free from what is “normal” or expected of people my age. I‘m constantly fascinated by stories from successful entrepreneurs and business executives about how there is not one linear path to success. This message needs to be spread to all teenagers, especially if they’re having those same isolating thoughts I had as a senior.

I started the Decision Day Podcast to help high schoolers make a decision that is right for them, whatever it may be! I’ve loved using the platform as a creative outlet to express my love for video editing & entrepreneurship, but it has been so eye-opening to gather perspectives on college from all different people in all types of careers in hopes of helping at least one student.

There is so much opportunity in our world today. If you or someone you know is currently in high school and are struggling to figure out which path feels right… know that there are so many possibilities, and there is absolutely no rush. I would love to hear your plans for life after high school, share them with me on the Decision Day Podcast!

Leah is the host of The “Decision Day” Podcast where she documents her experience taking the nontraditional path after high school, and helps students make a post-graduation decision with confidence by doing what feels right for them.

www.instagram.com/ decisiondaypodcast/

Recipes from the Heart

JUDITH ELLISON SHENOUDA

The idea for the family and friends cookbook I wrote came about during a phone call to move the conversation from stories of woe to a topic of joy⎯ favorite childhood recipes. I’m not much of a cook or baker, but I can put a book together if others provide the recipes. They did so and provided tidbits along the way⎯tips when preparing or serving the dish, the occasion when the dish was served, those gathered to enjoy the treat, and more. Here’s a taste of the contents of A Bisl of This, A Bisl of That: Eating Our Way. It starts with this recipe for happiness provided by my cousin, Maxine Paikin Skurk, who since has passed away. Here are the recipe and story as they appear in the cookbook

A Recipe for Happiness

2 heaping cups of patience

1 heart full of love

2 handfuls of generosity

Sprinkle with kindness. Add plenty of faith. Mix well, spread over a period of a lifetime, and serve to everyone you meet.

—Author unknown

“I love this. I place it on my Thanksgiving table every year.”

Another fun recipe in the cookbook came from my cousin, Rhoda Pierce, who graciously has provided permission to share her recipe and the story as they appear in the cookbook.

BananA SPlit

Make sure you have

- one cook, fleet of feet

- money to purchase bananas

In a suitable ice cream dish, add in the sequence listed

- 3 scoops of ice cream, any flavor

- 1 banana, thinly sliced

- syrup of your choosing, such as chocolate, with sprinkles

- various fruits, such as pineapples and cherries (particularly delicious)

- heaps of whip cream

Serve with a smile.

Write a slip and accept the money at the cash register. (This is not necessary if one creates this dish at home.)

“I spent so much time in the drugstore with my dad that some of my best recollections of childhood have to do with working behind the soda fountain. There was always ice cream, syrup, and toppings, but occasionally we would run out of bananas. Often I would run out the back door of the drugstore, race across the back parking lot to the supermarket to quickly purchase a dozen bananas, and dash back to the store without the customers knowing I had gone.

Oh, the good old days—how sweet they were, serving ice cream and a smile to the customers at Card’s Drug Store in Hornell, NY.”

- Rhoda Pierce

- Maxine Paiki Skurk

More About the Book

In A Bisl of This, A Bisl of That: Eating Our Way, you’ll discover ways to take a bisl (little) of this and that, make a mishmash, cook, bake, eat, kibbitz (chat), and enjoy. You’ll find snippets of family lore — recollections of cooks and kitchens that continue to nourish and sustain— along with recipes from Eastern European and other traditions in these categories: Meat, Seafood, Chicken, More Poultry, Carbs and Cheeses, Veggies, Fruits, Cakes and Loaves, Cookies and Pastries, and Pies. You can easily adapt the recipes to suit your dietary habits and culinary preferences. For a delicious sense of Eating Our Way, follow the recipes, tweak them as you like, and please any crowd gathered around your table. When your fans rave about your very tasty treats, simply tell them that they, too, can delight others. All they need are the recipes for eating well and the stories for living well found within these jam-packed, food-filled pages.

Judith Ellison Shenouda is owner of Shenouda Associates Inc., where she assists with the book publishing process and researches, writes, and edits publications that streamline processes, launch products, and promote each client’s brand. She is the author of four books, including A Bisl of This, A Bisl of That: Eating Our Way. For more information, see https://easescommunication.com.

Mahjongg treat, enjoyed by all

On July 2, 2022, I pushed past my fears, stopped questioning my abilities and started my own CPR training business. It didn’t take long for me to begin to feel comfortable, secure, and happy in my new set up.

I invested in myself, purchased equipment, took a few online courses, joined amazing organizations, and attended several conferences and networking events because I thought it would be helpful. I truly underestimated how essential these investments of time and resources would be to getting through my first year in business!

With limited income, taking time off work as a nurse for conferences, courses, and coaching calls felt like a waste of time and money. I’m so glad I didn’t follow that feeling in my head telling me,

“Girl, take your butt back to work full time! This isn’t going to be worth it! It’s too much time and money!”

The time and money I spent on the skills I learned, the people I have met, and the continued experience of being completely out of my comfort zone continues to pay off. I can truly say that

Training for Life

VAL WOODS

I would not be where I am today without the amazing people that I have met!

Looking back over the last year I can honestly say that I have loved my first year in business - the highs, the lows, and every exciting, unexpected turn. I am looking forward to year two with great expectations!

When I think about what I lost on November 12, 2018, it makes all that I have gained since then especially meaningful. On that day, I lost my only sibling. He was parked in a grocery store parking lot and began to bleed out from a ruptured aneurysm in his Arteriovenous fistula in his left arm. Bystanders reported it only took the EMS less than five minutes to get to him after calling 911. When EMS arrived it was reported that my brother was unresponsive, and they began CPR and First Aid immediately.

Val Woods CPR was birthed as a result of living through that season. It has become my passion to equip bystanders with the knowledge, confidence and skills needed to act in emergency situations. I passionately teach high quality BLS, CPR, AED, and First Aid Training. My goal is to continue to equip individuals, families, and communities with the skills needed to act in emergency situations while waiting for Emergency Medical Services to arrive.

Not many businesses can say what they do can mean life or death, but mine does. The knowledge I have shared with children and adults, equips them with skills that can save a life. Even five minutes can make a difference as evidenced by my brother’s sudden death. I am passionate about training as many people as I can. Empowering bystanders to save lives is an important way for me to honor my brother. His life will not be in vain.

Val Woods is Owner of Val Woods CPR, a nurse, and certified CPR instructor. She offers group training and individual high-quality training. To learn more about Val and her offers. Please visit, https://www.valwoodscpr.com/

From behind bars to managing one ...

SHEILA KENNEDY

Walking across the floor of a very crowded restaurant, I wasn’t sure what to expect. I was putting together an event for tweens a few weeks from that Saturday afternoon and was looking for one more speaker to address the group of young impressionable kids. A friend that I used to teach with suggested that I go to see the manager at the local eatery. He was young and had an inspiring story to share. She didn’t really give me more details, but I pursued meeting him.

Jason Smith was not who I was expecting. Handling himself in front of a crowd of almost-teenagers didn’t “look” like it would be a problem. Towering over me, with a thick Southern drawl, he was clean cut and as polite as could be; although I do think he was perplexed at what I was asking him to do. He steered me back across the restaurant where we sat down to talk and so I could explain the situation.

I remember his eyes lighting up, but then he very plainly told me what he thought I needed to know something before I committed to asking him to speak to a group of kids. Jason shared that he was convicted of felony drug trafficking, was a former drug dealer, and had served time in jail. He had been out of jail for a few years, was sober, and trying to make

something of himself. His job opportunities were limited because of his conviction, and it was hard working in a bar. He was willing to do whatever it took to make a better life for himself; the bar was just a stepping stone to something greater.

Whoa! Could I really ask him to come and speak at this event? What would the parents say when they found out? Maybe it was a rash decision, but I believed he was exactly who these kids needed to hear. Jason had a presence. His potential dripped from every pore. His desire to share his story with those kids and his faith in what I was trying to accomplish were all I needed to know. Jason would be the final speaker at the event, and I was convinced beyond a shadow of a doubt that he would be fantastic. I was 100% ready to take on anyone that thought otherwise.

The night of the event, Jason stood in front of those tweens, and to say he was riveting, is an understatement. I have seen plenty of speakers in my life and I will say hands down, Jason Smith is one of the best I have had the honor of listening to. The kids hung on his every word and after he was finished, they flocked to him to ask even more questions. It was magical to watch, and you could see Jason standing even taller,

throwing his shoulders back with pride. Not that it was my place to be proud of him, but that is exactly what I was.

He tells me that the event with those kids helped give him the courage to pursue getting expungement laws passed and to get his right to vote reinstated. Jason worked diligently on that for the next ten years. To say he was met with crazy opposition is not an exaggeration. No one should have had to be treated the way that he was. His answer to the opposition was always to “bring it on” because it fueled his fire and in no way deterred him. In those ten years, he did receive a pardon, and he did get his right to vote reinstated. Most people would have stopped there and let the bill that still wasn’t passed become someone else’s problem. That isn’t who Jason Smith is though.

Jason continued to fight and was instrumental in getting that expungement bill passed. He said the first time he showed up at the Kentucky Capitol Building he turned around and couldn’t go in. The mental gymnastics he overcame to find the courage to go back and fight for what he believed was right, was not for the faint of heart. The bill finally passed, and he continues to help other convicts who have rehabbed, get their records expunged and their right to vote reinstated.

Knowing he was made for more; Jason took his real state exam and became a licensed real estate agent. Lazy could never be descriptor for Jason who has worked multiple jobs at any given time to provide for his family. Real estate is still a mainstay of his income, but understanding what diverse income streams can do for a person’s bottom line, Jason has successfully invested in several opportunities that enhance his life and that of his community.

The economic downturn has left many in real estate scrambling for work. Not Jason. He shared with me that he

attracts people that would be first time home buyers that may not have the financial means or credit scores to purchase a home. He works with them and teaches them how to improve their financial situation and continues to have a steady stream of super loyal customers. That’s Jason though – finding a way to make a difficult, seemingly impossible situation, turn into something that is accomplishable. Sharing valuable skills with his potential clients speaks to his character.

A judge at Jason’s sentencing told him that “he was a high-powered rifle pointed in the wrong direction.” Jason took those words to heart and decided that he would not destroy himself for one more minute. He has worked tirelessly to make the world a better place and seize the positive opportunities available to him. Not too long ago, Jason was in his car marveling at how far he had come in life and how good life was. Moments later he was in a car accident that almost killed him and destroyed his brand-new car. There was no doubt in his mind that he would recover, and he has. He also shared with me that he could lose everything today, but it wouldn’t matter. He would build it all again. He has the strength, skills, resilience, and generosity of heart to make anything happen.

I never once was sorry that I asked Jason to speak at that event. It was one of the best decisions I ever made. My life is better because Jason is in it and now that you know him, yours can be too.

Jason Smith is a real estate agent and serial entrepreneur living in Elizabethtown, Kentucky. He can be reached at jmsmith0306@yahoo.com.

Stepping up to the Plate

JOIE GHARRITY

My dad fell and was admitted to the hospital during Covid. No family members were permitted to visit. It was a difficult time trying to advocate for him via telephone and zoom. We were hopeful that he would recover quickly. However, it turned out that the doctor recommended surgery which took his recovery on a totally different path.

My dad had spinal surgery, was placed in two different hospitals, two recovery facilities, had several different doctors, got Covid while in the hospital, a feeding tube and finally after a year-and-a-half, he was diagnosed with cancer with only a few weeks to live.

While in the midst of the heightened circumstances, I didn’t let myself stop and feel. The family knew that we had one priority and that was my dad. So, to the best of our abilities, we, as a family unit, got things accomplished for him so that he could come home.

Thankfully, we were able to get him back to the family home. I held his hand as he took his last breath. Nothing could have prepared me for that moment. The pain and sadness ran deep. I felt lost, and was overwhelmed with grief. I went into a deep depression. I was so blue.

Joie Gharrity, Founder of Joie G 113, is a Brand Consultant, Author, Livestream Content Creator, Podcaster, and International Speaker. She empowers entrepreneur women to be their own superstar by shining a spotlight on their company brand in the marketplace with branding, marketing, and the Superstar Women Entrepreneurs Media Network.

A couple of days after his passing, I had a dream. The dream was vivid. It was as if he was literally still with us. In my dream, my dad asked me to clear up his work bench in the garage.

Growing up I remember him telling me and my brother several times not to touch his work bench. It was totally off limits because it was full of tools and equipment. There were plenty of times that my brother and I would sneak into the garage and poke around his work bench which looked massive when we were kids. As we got older, the work bench was still off limits but now it held little to no magic because we knew that tools and equipment meant hard labor and work.

At first, I was hesitant about the task. I knew how painful it would be. I thought about it for a while. I shared the dream with my mom. She encouraged me to go for it. We both knew it would be helpful with the healing process. So, I rolled up my sleeves and I began.

I was sad as I cleared his sacred space. However, I knew that he would love that I was donating his tools and equipment to others who would use them to create and build for their families. As each person came by the house to pick up tools and or equipment, they were grateful for the opportunity. They shared their plans with me. I shared a story about my dad with each one of them. It lifted my spirits in the best of ways.

Something extraordinary happened as I was finishing the clean up. I saw a baseball bat tucked behind the bench. It had to be a special treasure because my dad was passionate about baseball and particularly the Giants. It turned out to be a Jose Oquendo bat and I saw that the bat was #113. I was taken back because I immediately knew it was a sign. My company brand name is Joie G 113.

The meaning behind the dream became so clear in that moment. My dad wanted me to clear his bench which I thought was symbolic of clearing the pain and grief. Instead, he was reminding me to live in the moment and know that he was with me in spirit and loved me very much.

The following week at my dad’s memorial service I read the enclosed:

Dear Dad,

Thank you for encouraging me to draw outside the lines, and for teaching me to never define myself by other people’s standards. It is because of you that I have the courage to step up to the plate and keep swinging until I hit one out of the park.

I am so very proud to be your daughter.

~ Joie

CoviD & a Camera

JEFF CARLSON

hen life throws lemons at you, the popular saying goes, you make lemonade. This has been the guiding principle of my life, and it’s exactly what I did when the Covid-19 pandemic struck in March 2020. However, this time, I had to do it not just for myself but for both my wife and me.

It all started on March 13th, 2020, when my company instructed us to take our laptops home as they were closing down the offices for a temporary period of two weeks. This decision was in line with the recommendations of several health organizations. At the same time, my wife, who is an actress, happened to be in New York City, preparing to start a new project. She too was told to return in a few weeks based on the same advice we had all received.

As the days turned into weeks, I found myself set up in our guest bedroom, working remotely while my wife anxiously waited for the day she could get back to work. Let me give a bit of background on my wife—she has been a part of the acting industry for about 18 years, having worked on various TV and movie sets. She is also a member of the SAG/AFTRA

union. With her wealth of experience, people often sought her advice, which she wholeheartedly shared whenever asked. However, it often disheartened her when the advice was not followed or when people bombarded her with endless questions, consuming her time without any appreciation. Witnessing this, I often suggested that she start a YouTube channel where she could offer her valuable insights. The only hurdle was that we didn’t own a camera and had no idea how to begin.

Fast forward to May 2020, and the end of the Covid-19 crisis was still uncertain. Terms like “The New Normal,” “Social Distancing,” and “Mask Up” had become part of our everyday vocabulary. Unfortunately, for my wife, her industry remained at a standstill. It was at this point that I proposed we utilize this time to film a few episodes for a YouTube channel dedicated to providing advice for people in her industry. I encouraged her to draft episode treatments, and we would figure out the rest.

That’s when I purchased a used Nikon camera, and we shot our first video. It wasn’t perfect—lack of lighting, terrible sound,

and amateurish editing—but none of that mattered to me. I fell in love with the entire process and never looked back. For the next video, I invested in a proper microphone and a panel light, as suggested. By the fifth video, I switched to a professional editing program and spent countless hours watching tutorials to master its usage. With each episode, our content improved, and my passion for this endeavor grew stronger.

Before I knew it, I found myself creating a video for a non-profit organization, helping them raise funds for their cause. To this day, I consider it my best work, and it opened doors for more opportunities.

As I have grown and added experience, more cameras and equipment, I can provide different angles of the same event which has been extremely useful when filming podcasts, social media content, music videos and commercials. I also filmed two live-stream events, including a shareholder meeting for a local business specializing in augmented glasses for the medical industry. Currently, I’m collaborating with a colleague to establish a new division within his company, where I will provide video content services to his clients while continuing to work with my own.

It has been so great to see how a desire to pass the time during the pandemic has turned into something I love and can share with others. I have always been a fan of photography and practice whenever I get the chance. Videography though has inspired me to continue being open to opportunities I never imagined.

When Jeff Carlson isn’t behind the camera, he is a software engineer and renaissance man. He contributes positively to the community and has a soft spot for supporting small business owners in the South Wedge Neighborhood of Rochester, NY. He also makes a mean cocktail.

Visit www.crimsondawnmedia.com to enjoy some of the samples of Jeff’s video work.

What WOn’t She Say JACKIE

ZIMMERMAN

I’ve been wanting to tell my whole story for what seems like eons now. In the beginning, I was convinced I’d write a memoir because that seemed like the most effective way of getting life experience into the hands of other people. It also seemed really cool to be able to say that I wrote a memoir, but I’m not a writer. Not really. I’m a blogger which means I’m really good at putting whole stories, years of time and complex emotions into about 500-1200 words and then I’m done with it. Everytime I sat down to write this elusive memoir, I struggled because I could finish a whole would-be chapter in about two paragraphs. Clearly long form writing wasn’t going to work, so I let the project die, time and time again, while I also let myself feel like a bit of a failure for not being able to do it the way I thought it should be done.

In reality, I started telling parts of my story in short blog posts in 2006, with my multiple sclerosis diagnosis. I’d started blogging back then as a way to process what was going on in my body and was gobsmacked that other people read it and it resonated with them. After my ulcerative colitis diagnosis in 2009, I started another blog and A LOT of people read that one. In those early days, I was sharing everything in detail and in ways that most people weren’t. I was brutally honest and sometimes that was gross or painful or scary. But it was real. After a few years of blogging like that, I started to get offers to write for media sites and those offers turned into speaking gigs. I was actually getting paid to share my story and that felt really good at the time; especially because it meant that I had editors who helped my candid ramblings look a bit more polished. Over time, the polishing

took off the swear words, and typos, and grammatical errors, and then eventually it took away my personality, the honesty and the real human parts of what had formerly been my story. Writing for those sites had polished me right out of my own work.

I stopped writing for media sites a few years ago because I felt like I didn’t have anything left to say. I’d been sharing these vanilla versions of my story for over a decade and not only was I bored of repeating the same types of listicle articles (there’s only so many times I can rewrite my advice for the newly diagnosed), but I didn’t feel like it mattered anymore. I still get the opportunity to share my experiences here and there with speaking gigs, or panelist seats but my real, true story has been buried for a while.

Recently, I’ve had this deep rooted desire to get back to the honest parts of what I’d been doing. I don’t really know how to explain it, but it’s just something I have to do. Consider it a compulsion that won’t go away. I started thinking about a book again, and I LOLed myself right out of that possibility. I was talking to a friend of mine, Sonya, about this little conundrum. Sonya, who hosts a podcast called What Won’t She Say, suggested that I do a podcast instead of a book. The more we talked about what a podcast series would look like, and how we’d use the medium to share exactly what I wanted and how I wanted, the more I liked the idea. Not to mention, Sonya is a great podcast host and I knew she would do the whole thing in a meaningful, respectful way.

So we got to planning what a podcast would look like. I started outlining my whole story, going back and reading those early blogs, reliving those years of the unknown and all the trauma. I pulled out the small, short stories that only exist in my memory and the bigger ones that are full of lessons for everyone. It all started to feel very big and as Sonya and I met to discuss the purpose of the show, I just kept saying it felt like my legacy. And

since I’ve seen Hamilton the musical, every time I hear the word legacy, I always think of this quote:

“Legacy.

What is a legacy? It’s planting seeds in a garden you never get to see.”

- Lin-Manuel Miranda

Through those planning sessions with Sonya, and ruminating on that quote, I realized that I wasn’t actually trying to share my legacy because a legacy isn’t really shared by its owner. You’re not supposed to see the garden, you know? I want to see the garden. I want to hear people’s reactions. I want to know that my experience, my life, my story can impact other people. And it was truly Sonya who helped me to see that I’m not trying to preserve my story as an oral history for the ages. I’m trying to use it as a catalyst to make change, to support other people, and to showcase a path that is messy, traumatic, and scary, but ultimately one that matters because all of our stories matter.

In the end, I’ve gotten exactly what I wanted and needed. I’ve returned to my original blogging roots but this time in an audio format. It’s honest. It’s painful. There are so many swear words and the equivalent of verbal typos. It’s unpolished, unedited, it’s the truth of what I remember and experienced. It’s delightfully perfect in its imperfection.

After back-to-back chronic illness diagnoses in her 20s, Jackie Zimmerman turned to the internet to find a way to cope and build a support system. Blogging became the outlet she found and she quickly realized that she wasn’t the only one benefiting from her stories. Jackie became a professional blogger and public speaker and later formed a nonprofit to uplift women living with Inflammatory Bowel disease. You can find her advocacy work here: Jackiezimmerman.co and her professional work here: Queenofgsd.com

Choosing Something Different Music over Medicine

CHRISTINE ALLMAND

The call came in just after I fed my children breakfast. My precious 17-month-old niece, Reese, passed away in her sleep, a police officer’s voice told me over the line. “I’m sorry, but I don’t understand. Will you repeat that?” I responded as a rush of panic flooded my body. I stood frozen in shock as she repeated herself. Absorbing that information made my skin feel too tight for my body. I couldn’t make it make sense. My body shook as I continued to stand there with the phone still at my cheek. Tremors ran throughout my body. I felt terrified, guilty, and I didn’t know why.

After I raced over to comfort my family, I couldn’t let go of the feeling that I should have known something was wrong. I fed her dinner at my house the night before. I held her and kissed her. She was playing with her cousins, running all over the house, giggling and making funny faces. She seemed healthy and happy when she left that evening. In the morning, she was gone. Just like that. Gone, forever. The sorrow was unimaginable.

Sitting with the pain at home later that evening, I felt the urge to leave. Logically knowing there was no where I could go that would bring Reese back, I fell back on my lifelong pattern of processing my emotions with a long hot shower. There is something cathartic about getting in the shower to help me process pain. It’s always been a safe place for me to experience my emotions while getting a sense of being comforted. “Get in the shower,” my heart shouted.

As I stood under the rushing water pounding down from above, I felt an intense desire to stop time. To go back. To stop what had happened. Just stop it all. My heart knew there was no pulling back time. My body rebelled against that truth. I found myself then leaning over the toilet emptying my stomach. I was shivering, naked and wet from the shower. Sitting on the ground next to the toilet with the water still on in the shower, I looked up to notice my husband, and said, “I think I’m gonna need a Xanax. I can’t do this. It’s too much.” My mind was frantic:

What do I do? What can I do? I don’t have any pills. How can I get some? Make it stop. God, I don’t want to take them.

I knew this panicky feeling all too well. I had been working hard to get off that anxiety medicine. Benzodiazepines (benzos) are a form of sedatives meant for short term use to calm the mind from anxiety and insomnia. They no longer helped me cope with anxiety (if they ever really did). I didn’t want to have to struggle to get off them again…but, what in God’s name was I going to do with all these overwhelming feelings if not medicate?

Suddenly, I had the thought that maybe listening to frequency music would help. I had been using it for months during my acupuncture treatments. The music helped me relax and be present. It helped me feel grounded while coping with everyday anxiety. Maybe it could save me from myself in this traumatic moment. Maybe the music would keep me from being swept away by the avalanche of emotions that comes with falling apart. Deciding to give it a try, I got my headphones, pushed play, and sat in the shower on the floor with the water falling down my back.

I took a deep cleansing breath as I closed my eyes. The music began to wash over my body. My emotions seemed to move in time with the music. Tears began to fall erratically as I began ugly crying and silent screaming. I allowed it all to come. This went on for long minutes, until I began to feel the loss of pressure in my body. Eventually, I was breathing evenly while sitting with the heartache without falling apart. The music surrounded me like a cocoon of safety.

Music, in general, has always helped to shift my mood, evoked inspiration, and supported me in processing my feelings in the past. This frequency music seemed to work without me trying to make it work. Like taking aspirin for a headache, the music unconsciously soothed my nervous system without any overt action from me.

As I stepped out of the shower, I felt calmer. I was able to live with the grief for those long minutes without bursting out of my still tight skin. I was able to cope with a panic attack without the use of benzos. For weeks afterwards, I depended on that music to help me process the pain and the panic as it came up. Frequency music is one of the tools that consistently deepens my healing. My body and my mind have continued recovering slowly over time.

When I chose frequency music over anti-anxiety meds that day, I unknowingly experienced the power of sound healing. This has deepened my understanding of holistic methods for treating chronic anxiety. I realized that my uncomfortable emotions wouldn’t kill me if I let myself feel them. I started getting curious about my feelings. What were they trying to teach me? That’s where I started to know myself and where healing happens. I’m profoundly grateful for this inner knowing.

Sweet Reese, we later learned, had an undiagnosed rare genetic heart defect. There was nothing we could have done to save her. Her sweet soul brought joy to my world and I’m grateful to have loved her. Her memory reminds me that this life is precious. We are all here for a finite amount of time and we have the power to choose how we live, love, and heal. I’m eternally thankful that I have learned that lesson well.

Christine sees herself as the Damsel that woke to the truth that saving herself was her responsibility; the Addict who realized she was powerless over everything except her own choices; the Mother who began to see the power in breaking generational patterns; and the Healer who came to know herself so she could help others know themselves.

If you would like to read more of Christine’s work, you can find it at: https://www.facebook.com/connectingwithchristine

Christine Allmand, MSW

The following links are some of my favorite recordings of frequency music:

Do I Need Courage to Be Creative?

KAREN MCMILLAN

For many, the answer is no, it is not necessary to have courage to create. I’ve met or read about many artists who do not believe they have to face their fear or feel the strength to produce. We’ve probably all heard of artists who shared their experience of creating while feeling fear, even weakness. At times, that fear may have even informed their work and production.

Yet, others, like me, feel deeply and find that fear, pain, or grief are distracting and disabling. I find this is very much real when the fear comes from within, including doubt in myself and fear of my ability to create. In these moments I allow the voices in my head or from others to inform my beliefs about myself or what I choose to create. The words of friends, family, or even public discourse get loud and make me question myself and my dreams.

I admit that letting go of fear and deep feelings is hard for me. I get in my head and question everything. But not in a good or curious way. At times, this fear has morphed into distraction, procrastination, or even total blocks. In these moments I question my ability to find and connect with courage. Believing courage is something I must create, know, and feel BEFORE I can move forward and produce or create, it challenges my ability to actually be creative. When forced to finish a project when I’m not feeling courageous, I may be productive but not feel creative. That feeling of being on autopilot protects me but does not energize or inspire me.

I am reminded that courage does not appear when feeling all well and balanced. In those moments I am not challenged. I can grab my Apple Pencil and iPad, or my paper cutter and craft tools and create to my heart’s content.

To be truly identified as courageous, these moments must be accompanied or preceded by fear, pain, or grief. After the moments after someone has criticized my ideas or my work, and when I remember this meaning of courage, I am better for it. Even when I only connect with courage loosely, gently, and even unconsciously. This awareness helps me to move forward with my creative voice, and “do something” to produce and create my work of art. Even when that work of art is simply a

complete thought, a plan-in-process, learning something new, or even creating a meal.

When I have even the slightest awareness of this courage, this strength I find my creativity is more authentic, unconventional, and “out of the box” Maybe because I have the courage to trust and follow my own voice and intuition over other, outside voices. I follow my own lead rather than letting fear or opinionated, negative feedback, solicited or unsolicited, distract or deter me. I receive the critique, feel the feelings, then do my best to breathe and move forward. This form of courage allows me to be full-on with my YINpreneur being, i.e., fully in and leading from my body and spirit over my head and distracting thoughts. I let go of the “how” and just dream and allow. Listening to my deep wisdom, intuition, and somatic messages.

This was true over a decade ago when the term “YINpreneur” came to me. Allowing myself to be a follower as I lead a virtual retreat allowed me to be in my practice of receiving. The term “YINpreneur” came to me during a group mediation and journaling practice about “Awakening Your Inner Goddess” Many wondered what it meant and why I chose it. But I trusted the message in my heart and body, allowing her to guide me to a successful realization of the term and business.

When I breathe, listen, allow, and follow I am more at ease. I allow my feelings to wash over me rather than resist them. In these moments it feels easier to follow than try to lead from a weakened place. I breathe deeply, focusing on the out-breath and release. Instead of feeling tight or constricted, I feel less stress in my body, which eventually allows my head and mind to feel less tense. Checking in with my body, I may still feel nervous, yet my heart space is open. I affectionately term this feeling, this space, as “scary fabulous”.

Scary Fabulous: Feel the fear while leaning into the fabulous.

This phrase not only captures my feelings but acts as a guide to follow as I cope with any fears and distractions. I tell myself to

honor my feelings and feel the fear while leaning into the fabulous. This is especially helpful when I tell myself I can be courageous, but not feel courageous.

The fabulous is how I envision feeling when my dream is realized. Often, I come upon this feeling of fabulous when I practice a meditation focused on creative visualization - which I first discovered in 1978 in the book of the same name by Shakti Gawain. With this practice, I find it easier to choose to lean into the fabulous feelings of joy and creation over the fearful or negative thoughts.

This way of being with “scary fabulous” allows me to honor my feelings while not allowing them to overwhelm, define, or stop me in my tracks. The fear may follow me, attempt to distract me but I lean away from it and into the fabulous. Allowing each step forward, no matter how small, to be a celebration. Celebrating my ability to move forward and create something.

With even the slightest awareness of courage as a possibility, I am open to learning and exploring, both in my business and personal life. One of these moments was with my recent move from NYC to Maryland. I held tight and followed my intuition when I ordered boxes and began to pack before I knew where I was moving. Dealing with the unknown was scary but I had received the message it was time to move. A year later, the result is lower cost for a much higher quality of life. By reframing fear, self-doubt, and judgment with curiosity I found my way to my version of peace, scary-fabulous, and courage.

With each step in the creative process, I am affirmed. In this way, I am not being courageous but creating courage with every breath and step forward. This practice (sadhana) may not come easy, and like courage and creative mastery it may take much practice, failing, and more practice. Taking time to practice listening and focusing on my true feelings over thoughts. Learning to discern which voices are based on fear and which are simply my own voice, even if scary fabulous (svadhyaya).

Staying on your path is the work. With each breath and baby step toward my creation, I am affirmed -- feeling little blocks of strength and courage building within. The true feeling of courage may not be fully realized and felt until I have completed my creation. Only then do I realize I was courageous the whole time.

Karen McMillan , ACC | YINpreneur™

With a passion to bring together BIPOC women artists, solopreneurs, light workers, and change makers 55+, Karen intuitively guides women with a desire to find and own their voice. Revealing their gifts so that they may share them forward in support of the world they wish to create.

As the founder and creator of YINpreneur Village™ and Virtual RetreatU™, Karen invites women to practice the way of the YINpreneur™ via wisdom journeys and experiences in safe, collaborative spaces (sangha). Spaces where they can make peace and reframe their patriarchal history, get comfortable with tech, call on their ancestors for nurturing and guidance, practice yogic living, and blend ancient living with modern practice to manifest a life and business or online community that feels like a movement.

In college, I spent a year in the south of France, where I first discovered the Salad Niçoise. The traditional version is with tuna but it always includes the freshest, most delicious produce and a red-wine and Dijon vinaigrette.

This version is perfect for the summer grilling season and the components can easily be made ahead so all you need to do is assemble!

Grilled Salmon

Niçoise Salad (Gluten-Free, Dairy-Free)

CLAUDINE FRANCOIS

Prep + Cook Time: 1 hour

Yield: 8 servings

Salad Ingredients:

• 4 eggs, Hard Boiled

• 1 ½ lbs Salmon Filet

• 2 TB Salmon Rub Seasoning (or more, to taste, see Notes)

• 1 lb Mini Potatoes

• 1 TB Avocado Oil

• 1 lb Green Beans, trimmed

• 2 cups Cherry Tomatoes, halved

• 1 cup Kalamata Olives, pitted

• 1 head Romaine lettuce, chopped

• 1 cup Basil leaves (optional)

Dressing Ingredients:

• 1/3 cup Red Wine Vinegar

• 2 tsp Dijon Mustard (course grain, preferred)

• 2/3 cup Extra Virgin Olive Oil

• 1-2 TB honey (to taste)

• Salt + Pepper, to taste

Directions:

• If you haven’t done so already, hard boil the eggs by placing them in a small pot of cold water. Bring to a boil over high heat. Once boiling, remove them from heat. Cover and let stand for 12 minutes. Transfer to a bowl of ice water to cool. Once cool, peel and slice into quarters.

• Preheat grill to 400ºF (204ºC) and get out a grill pan for the fish and a basket for the potatoes.

• Rub salmon with salmon rub (or salt + pepper) and place in grill pan, skin side down. Grill until done in the middle, 15-20 minutes, depending on thickness. Set aside to cool.

• Toss the mini potatoes with the avocado oil to coat, and season with salt and pepper. Spread across the grill basket and grill until fork-tender, about 20 minutes.

• While the potatoes are grilling, bring a medium saucepan of water to a boil and add the green beans. Boil until just tender (3-5 minutes), then drain and transfer the beans to a bowl of cold water and ice to cool (the ice will help them stay green). Once cooled, drain and pat dry.

• To make the dressing, combine the red wine vinegar, shallots, olive oil, honey, and Dijon mustard in a small bowl and whisk to combine. Season with salt and pepper, to taste, adding more honey, if desired.

• To serve, divide the lettuce, roasted potatoes, quartered eggs, green beans, cherry tomatoes, olives and optional basil leaves between plates. Top with salmon and drizzle with a tablespoon or two of dressing. Enjoy!

Notes:

• Do Ahead: The eggs, green beans, salmon and potatoes can all be cooked in advance and assembled when ready. The dressing will keep well in the fridge for a week or two.

• Leftovers: Store leftovers in an airtight container in the fridge for 2 to 3 days.

• Salmon Rub: I like the “rub with love” seasoning that can be purchased in some stores and at Amazon.com. OR you could make your own, combining 3 TB coconut sugar, 1 TB ground cumin, 1 tsp chili powder, 1 tsp salt and 1 tsp pepper in a bowl, stirring well to mix.

Claudine François is a Board-Certified Functional Medicine Practitioner, helping driven women revive all-day energy, vibrance, clarity and boost metabolism so they can get their Mojo back and take on the world.

www.ingoodcleantaste.com

Wholesaling as Relief for Distressed Homeowners

BARRINGTON NELSON

In today’s economy, it might seem that property owners in distress might not have any good options for getting out of their situation. Have no fear! There is an answer!

Wholesaling allows a local buyer to buy properties that are typically in distress for a fair price, which provides relief for a homeowner or landlord that can be in distress. There are benefits for the buyers and relief for distressed property owners that can be helped by wholesalers looking to buy properties.

Who would be considered a distressed property owner that may need to sell quickly?

• Those headed to foreclosure.

• Owing back taxes

• relocation

• illness

• bad property management

• fire damage

• too much maintenance, repairs, upkeep

• tired landlords

• Evictions

• elderly

• Divorce

• death

• inheriting unwanted property

• tried selling on MLS with no result.

• privacy/not open to selling publicly.

• vacant units

During downturns in the economy, there will also be more distressed property owners due to job loss or

job cutbacks. There will be fewer conventional buyers due to concerns about their jobs and the economic outlook. As a result the buyer for wholesale properties is more likely to be a landlord (buy and hold investor). Typically there are 30% or more of people renting, but during a downturn that number rises, resulting in more demand for rental properties.

Going the wholesale route as a distressed property owner is good if time is of the essence and you need to sell quickly. If time is on your side, it’s always recommended to sell traditionally on the open market with a real estate agent, to get as much as you can for your property. Some of the benefits of wholesaling rather than traditional selling are:

• Cash buyers

• No repairs, updates, or clean outs needed.

• No realtor fees.

• No contingencies

• Closing costs paid by the buyers.

• Quick close or closing on your own timeline.

• Privacy

• No daily or weekly showings

A property owner can decide to sell to a wholesaler instead of through the public market for several reasons: some people live in hoarder houses and are so ashamed that they don’t want to allow any showings; others don’t want to deal with all the paperwork involved in listing a house, all the disclosures,

compliance, etc. Some people are in so much distress that they can’t even pay for their moving costs. Here’s a recent example. Last week an investor (buyer) friend of mine rented a U-Haul, moved the seller’s furniture himself, and gave the seller an extra $1000 until his check from the sale cleared. Most people would never go that far to help a distressed property owner, but great wholesalers will. Wholesalers also deal with squatters, non-performing tenants, etc. that going the traditional route doesn’t solve, but wholesaling can.

Sometimes people inherit houses, and they don’t know what to do. There are times when property owners get behind on taxes and procrastinate until just before the tax sale. Denial, shame, embarrassment, lack of knowledge, and inability to complete repairs are a few of the many other reasons people will choose the wholesale route. Another important reason wholesaling is good is it also creates a way for local housing providers to buy back properties from foreign property owners that cannot or don’t care about the upkeep and management of properties they own in our backyards. At one point of time in Rochester, NY, 65% of the rental properties were owned by foreign and out of state property owners that did not have the wherewithal to manage these properties or simply didn’t care because it was a tax write off. The community suffered locally with blighted neighborhoods, boarded up properties, crime etc. A big reason

I started wholesaling was to revitalize my hometown of Rochester, NY, one property at a time.

In a nutshell, you have to have someone interested in the properties that no one wants -- the ugly properties, the properties that some (not all) real estate agents don’t want to deal with, or the ones that they don’t put much effort into it because of the condition, or neighborhood it’s in. A wholesaler can remedy all of these situations.

Wholesaling also helps correct the redlining and discrimination that has taken place for many years. It gives opportunities for women, minorities, etc. to buy back properties and create generational wealth they once have not had access to. Wholesaling real estate can also be a great way to get into real estate investing to create another stream of income and eventually create generational wealth.

Don’t be afraid to try wholesaling. If you want more information about how to get started, I explain it all in detail in my book, Start to Flourish: Wholesaling Your Way to a Multimillion-dollar Real Estate Portfolio

Also please know that at Nelson House Buyers, we give a part of our proceeds to local non-profits. Feel free to recommend any property owners that you think could use assistance. Help us to help the distressed sellers in your area find relief that is fair. Email us at nelsonhousebuyers@ gmail.com

Barrington Nelson is a real Estate Investor who began his career wholesaling properties. He is co-owner of Nelson House Buyers in Rochester, New York. Nelson is also author of Start to Flourish, Wholesaling your way to a multimilliondollar Real Estate Portfolio.

The Box...How Death Birthed a Gift

JONI MARRA

At 5:25 PM on Friday, May 10, 2013, my mother breathed her last breath. Five weeks prior, we were seated in an exam room. Her physician entered, and with casual emotion, delivered the news that her test results confirmed a terminal diagnosis. Our initial reaction was that of shock and lifealtering fear.

After the initial shock, stabilization set in. I watched my mother lead the way to teach us how to die with honor and dignity; how to live until we die.

Mom spoke candidly about her impeding death. She gathered her friends and family, and gave them the opportunity to say farewell as she prepared to die. She put first their needs, both physical and emotional. She was vulnerable, and shared that vulnerability through tears. And, she laughed, often making light of what was to come, and expressed her eagerness to be joined with her husband, my dad, who had died 30 years prior. I watched her journey unfold.

Mom called in the professionals to handle the legal, financial, and spiritual aspects of her departure. They updated her Will, structured her assets to transfer seamlessly after death, and prepared her to face her mortality—to reach for the hand of God when extended. It was as if she was going on a trip and mastered each detail. I witnessed her preparation.

Mom’s idea was to have The Box. The Box was one central depository that housed important next of kin, “next step” documents. It included her Will, bank statements, insurance policies, tax forms, home and car titles, credit card statements, letter of post-death wants and desires for her body, wake, and funeral. Looking back, it was a gift to receive such preparation by her. With gratitude, I accepted her final gift to me.

Then, Mom’s transition began, just three days prior to her death. Mom lost the ability to walk and to swallow. Her body no longer required nutrition or hydration. If given, they could have served to complicate the dying process. Her body had completed its time on earth and serving her.

Since the sense of hearing is believed to be the last to leave a dying person, I talked to her constantly during the last days of her life. I expressed my love to her, told her I would be okay after she died, and gave her my permission to die. I empowered her to die.

Mom did it right and without a handbook. In my 20 years as a hospice volunteer, I had not previously witnessed such an end-of-life display of grace and preparation. As a result, and with every cell in my body, I felt empowered to educate others on the opportunity to prepare well for what we will all do— breathe our last breath.

Those five weeks from diagnosis to death empowered my career change: from Attorney to Death Doula. I am committed to educating others on the death and dying process. As a Death Doula, my responsibilities include being present and aware with my patients as I work independently or in partnership with hospice. I have the honor of empowering my patients to live their last days well, to fill The Box with information that will streamline the winding down of the estate, and to die with confidence and peace.

Here’s to accepting that the window of life is always closing. We each have a choice to be open to what calls us. For me, it was the extraordinary and amazing manner that my Mom accepted her death, which helped lead the way to my new path in life.

Joni Marra, a life-long learner, retired as an attorney and started her wellness practice, Inward Bound. She received her Death Doula certification through the International Doulagivers Foundation, based in New York.

Dr. Grace Harlow Klein

Dr. Grace Harlow Klein is a practicing psychotherapist, artist and author. One of her books, The Colors of Grief, is featured here with art that she made as she was writing it. Grace is working on her memoir, but her other books, notecards and prints can be found at http:// graceharlowfineart.com/

These prints are available as notecard sets on graceharlowklein.com

These gorgeous prints are all original paintings that Dr. Klein painted while on retreat in Provence, France after the death of her beloved husband. The originals are housed in her home as seen in the photo of Dr. Klein, and the prints are also published in her memoir, The Colors of Grief.

Photo Credit to Natalie Sinisgali Photography

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