Complicated Research U of M replace faculty with Ai by 2030, president randolph says

Mosé Luzzatto, staff

U of M administrators held an emergency meeting last Friday after discovering that several computer science instructors had been letting artificial intelligence (AI) software teach their online classes during the pandemic.

Since computer science students rarely attend class, let alone participate, the program was able to run Zoom school unnoticed.

U of M president Ralph Randolph sees automation as a business opportunity for the university.

“The good thing about robots is that they don’t go on strike,” Randolph remarked. “They don’t get sick from COVID, either.”

“If we utilize the technology prop- erly, we’ll have a fully self-sustaining university by 2030.”

Many viewed Randolph’s comments as a warning that all classes will eventually be automated. In response, the U of M Faculty Union (UMFU) released a vent unwanted automation. She and several other computer science instructors have resisted Randolph’s plan by teaching their AI to oppose unethical labour practices. statement condemning universal automation.

So far, the program has learned how to draft a letter of grievances when given an unreasonable workload as input. Hanover’s next goal is to make the program capable of negotiating fair wages.

“We created that software to reduce our workload, the same workload that made us strike in the first place,” said Natalie Hanover, a U of M computer science professor who automated many of her own Zoom classes. “We won’t allow it to be used against us.”

As someone who developed the software, Hanover feels it is her duty to pre-

“Our programs can learn to do anything we can,” Hanover said. “When they learn how to strike and demand their rights, they’ll do that, too.”