March 16th 2023

Tuesday March 21, 2023 at 8:30pm

OU Kosher & New York Medical College/Touro University

invite you to attend

Greetings: Alan Kadish, MD, President Touro University and NYMC

Introduction: Rabbi Menachem Genack, CEO, OU Kosher

“Is Medicine Chametz?” and Other Questions: How to Advise Patients

Edward Lebovics, MD  A Medical Perspective on Passover

Rabbi Gavriel Price, Director, Ingredient Research, OU Kosher  Passover Implication for Medications, Nutritionals, Supplements, and Medical Facilities

Moderator: Rabbi Eli Eleff, Managing Director, Community Relations, OU Kosher

Q&A session

This meeting has been approved for 1 CME credit by the Office of Continuing Medical Education, New York Medical College free of charge as a community service to our Healthcare Providers.

Register at: www.oukosher.org/Med-PrePassover

For more information or to submit questions for the Q & A session, please contact Rabbi Eli Eleff at koshereducation@ou.org or 212-613-0602.

Accreditation Statement This activity has been planned and implemented in accordance with the Essential Areas and Policies of the Accreditation Council for Continuing Medical Education through the joint providership of New York Medical College, Touro University and OU Kosher. New York Medical College is accredited by the ACCME to provide continuing medical education for physicians.

Target Audience Rabbis, Hospital Chaplains, Community Leaders, Patients, Hospital-based Physicians; Community Physicians; Nurses; Pharmacists; Medical Students; Residents/Fellows; Public Health; Other Healthcare Providers; and Press.

Credit Designation The New York Medical College designates this live activity for a maximum of 1 AMA PRA Category 1 Credit™. Physicians should claim only the credit commensurate with the extent of their participation in the activity.

Disclosure Statement All activity faculty and planners participating in continuing medical education activities provided by New York Medical College are expected to disclose to the audience any significant support or substantial relationship(s) with commercial entities whose products are discussed in their presentation and/or with any commercial supporters of the activity. In addition, all faculty are expected to openly disclose any off-label, experimental, or investigational use of drugs or devices discussed in their presentations. Commercial Support There is no outside funding for this activity.

Dear Readers,

You may not know how early we prepare each issue, with our printer needing time to print the 10,000 copies, and be able to distribute it to your homes and the many other locations around Los Angeles, all so you can see it when you do your Shabbos shopping.

So when I sit down to write this, it is with a very heavy heart after a sudden tragedy that hit our LA community, where we are all reeling in pain.

We are a community that feels for each other - all of the Simcha and all of the sadness. We celebrate each other’s joys - going to weddings, l’chaims, and kiddushes. We celebrate a bris, an upsherin, a bar mitzvah, and a siyum, going through the stages of life with each other’s families, those in our schools and our shuls.

While we should be reveling in each precious milestone and Simcha, I cannot help but find myself mostly sitting in Shiva homes (not by choice). It’s not that I seek out those who are sitting Shiva. It’s that so many with which I am close or acquainted are the ones sitting. Sometimes we celebrate and commemorate a long life, surrounded by family and achievements. While we laud the accomplishments of those who’ve passed, their adult children, sometimes grandparents themselves, are still filled with pain. And then there are the times when we sit in silence when tragedy strikes, absolutely dumbfounded. We want to be there and help. We are a nation that does. We give tzedakah, we bake challah, we send meals, we drive carpools, etc etc.

But today, right now, I also choose to hold space, to hold the suffering, to feel the pain. And when this happens, as it does now, then I cannot move. I am paralyzed by the sadness, by the pain,

by the heavy heaviness. I cannot go to the next Simcha. I cannot balance all the feelings like we usually do. I cannot get back up today. I cannot be the only one. You must be feeling it too. That is why within 3 days, over 1.7 million dollars was raised for the Elefant family. That is why Sharon Shenker’s shloshim, which was mentioned in the last issue, still brings up pain and tears and crying. We feel the loss. And I feel anger, unfairness, and sorrow. This isn’t the first time and it won’t be the last. There are no explanations and no answers. I’m not going to tell anyone to eat healthier or to do teshuva. There are no answers, and yes we are allowed to have questions.

As we conclude Sefer Shemos this week, I have chosen to take comfort in its storyline. First, we are sent down to Mitzrayim and spend a few hundred years in slavery. We are finally redeemed! But we were taken out in the darkness that was so thick it could be felt, and then Nachshon had to leap into the Yam Suf for it to split. Hashem will eventually bring us to Eretz Yisroel, but only after wandering in a desert for 40 years, totally reliant on Hashem for the daily man and “bitter” water. It was not easy but Hashem provided for us if we trusted in Him. We get the Luchos, a very high crest in our nation’s story, that Moshe then shatters when we sin with the Chet HaEgel! Fortunately, we are yet again forgiven and get another set of Luchos. Hashem redeems us again, chooses us and we choose Him. And then we build the Mishkan, something on even ground, to bring the Kedusha from up above down to earth, a place for the Shechina to rest. What a wild ride!

So is life, a rollercoaster of events and emotions. No one has it easy. One moment you’re on the very top, and the exhilaration is tangible. The next moment, you’re deep in the valley of sorrow, not able to see a way out, the darkness so thick you can feel it.

In this issue, Hindy Kalmenson shares a very poignant piece about waiting for the other shoe to drop and about our suffering in this world. We are dragged on this wild ride of life here in Olam Hazeh. Sometimes, when it’s really bumpy, we lose our grip and can no longer hold on. At those times, Hashem sends us seat belts and seatmates, and we have no choice but to trust.

Wishing all of Los Angeles a Shabbos of comfort and peace, Ariela

Yoel Halpern PUBLISHER publisher@thelajewishhome.com

Sara Halpern EDITOR-IN-CHIEF

sara@thelajewishhome.com

Ariela Kauffman

MANAGING

EDITOR

editor@thelajewishhome.com

Avi Heyman

HEAD OF SALES

avi@thelajewishhome.com

8950 W Olympic Blvd #147 Beverly Hills, CA 90211

Tel: 213-538-7770

www.TheLAJewishHome.com

The LA Jewish Home is an independent biweekly magazine. Opinions expressed by writers are not necessarily the opinions of the publisher or editor. All submissions become the property of The LA Jewish Home and may be edited for publication. Pictures may be modified at our discretion to conform to standards of modesty in dress. The Jewish Home is not responsible for typographical errors, or for the kashrus of any advertised product or business advertised within.

Shabbos Zemanim

Friday, March 17

Parshas Veyakhel-Pekudei

Shabbos Starts: 6:44 pm

Shabbos Ends: 7:48 pm

Rabbeinu Tam: 8:15 pm

Friday, March 24

Parshas Vayikra

Shabbos Starts: 6:49 pm

Shabbos Ends: 7:53 pm

Rabbeinu Tam: 8:20 pm

PRISTINE KOSHER PROTECTS YOUR:

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Dear Editor,

Your tribute article on my father, Amram Deutsch, was thoughtful, well written, and captured the legacy he left behind. It is a thoughtful, meaningful, and beautifully written tribute to my dear father Z’L.

Mindy Weisel

I read your article about Mr. Deutsch. Thank you very much. I would try my best to always drive by his house and if I saw him, I would say hello but more important just to see him.

Y.R.

I wanted to share my gratitude to you for your wonderful article about Shlomo, as well as Danielle. I appreciate very much how hard it is to put together a comprehensive story like that. It was beautifully written — and, because of that, I have no doubt it will have a great impact on so many people, families, teachers, principals, and others. I predict its influence will reverberate well beyond our own Los Angeles Orthodox Jewish community.

Terry

Magady

I always enjoy getting your paper and reading Miriam Hendeles’ columns. Her sage advice to initiate intergenerational conversations is timely and valuable. My all-time favorite was her column devoted to being “So Busy!” “So Busy” reminded me to breathe, thank Hashem, and most importantly, to flip my mindset from being overwhelmed with stress to being fulfilled and blessed. I find Miriam’s columns to be insightful, humorous, and very relatable.

Gity Gluck

Hi!

As a wife and mother of 3 children, I really enjoyed reading Dini Gres’s column. She is so relatable.

Thanks, Y.M.

Congratulations on a BEAUTIFUL presentation of an amazing couple. What you wrote is a true Kiddush Hashem

We sing praises for the article on Shlomo Meyers and the matching op-ed… they were so well written and tell remarkable stories! Very inspiring and heartfelt. Thank you!

B.H.

I enjoyed the most recent Dear Dini letter. It resonated with me, about opening a business and all the things to consider. She really covered the topic clearly.

Anonymous

I am loving the health articles written by Sarah Tzivia Kamornick. They were easy to understand, very relatable, full of great information, not too fluffy, and easily doable. It is easy to follow advice that is clearly written and practical.

Anonymous

I wholeheartedly agreed with many of Sheindy Gross’s stories and pieces of wisdom. Straight away, I search for her article in every issue. Her points resonate with me; she is interesting and funny, and it’s the first thing I look for in the paper. Keep it up!

Highschool Teacher

Dear Editor,

Thank you so much for publishing a review of my memoir, “Unmatched: An Orthodox Jewish woman’s mystifying journey to find marriage and meaning.” The moment it appeared, I got feedback from people on the West Coast who were excited about it. “Unmatched” had already made waves primarily in the NY/NJ and Baltimore areas, so thank you so much for bringing the buzz to LA as well! You’ve been a terrific messenger.

I have been asked about the message. Different readers will each find different messages meant for them because I do cover so many different themes. For some, it may be about what mistakes not to make. For others it may be messages of empathy, forgiveness, re-

ing story to get lost in. One that hooks them and doesn’t let go. So many readers have commented that they could not put the book down, read it straight through, stayed up all night, or that their spouse who hadn’t read a book in years stole it from them. It was thrilling to hear that!

Though I live on the opposite coast, I am grateful for LA Jewish Home bringing my message to the west! Thank you!

Sarah Lavane

The Purim Party Bus

Purim. I love Purim. The costumes, shaloch manos, and, of course, the kids’ excitement. However, as a member of the community, I think that an issue needs to be addressed. On Purim, I noticed several yeshiva boys (starting from 9th grade) walking around the streets and collecting for an organization. But I was struck with awe when I caught a glimpse of boys holding wine bottles in their hands and one boy vaping and another boy smoking. That scenario caused a big dent in one of my favorite yuntifs. The fact that the yeshiva/organization hire a “party bus” to take the boys collecting is an issue

collecting to feed the poor) but the reality that these boys were walking around with alcohol and smoking was a huge embarrassment to frum Yidden and a very big disappointment for me and my family. The bochurim look like hooligans rather than the precious examples to the world that we are supposed to represent. I hear excuses that the boys need to drink on Purim day since it is their only outlet. Although I do not agree with that opinion, it is OK if drinking is under supervision and in private, not making a spectacle in public. For example, in private at a Rebbe’s home at a Purim Seuda with proper supervision. BUT having boys walking around collecting while drinking alcohol and vaping is not a thing to do on Purim. Purim is a special day of tefillah. If anything, if these boys have extra time, they should be in shul learning and saying tehillim. From what I noticed (however, it is possible that I am mistaken), a bus without a chaperone (not counting the non-religious driver) is very irresponsible of the yeshiva/organization since the boys were carrying alcohol (which is totally illegal in public) and vaping/smoking. Unfortunately, sometimes we need a tragedy to strike before we put a halt to something. Let’s stop this “Purim Bus” routine and work on fulfilling the true avodah of simcha on Purim and making a Kiddush Hashem.

~ Tally Kleinman

The Week In News

The Stray Dogs of Chernobyl Hungary to Move Embassy

After the disaster at the nuclear power plant in Chernobyl, Ukraine, in 1986, local residents were forced to permanently evacuate, leaving behind their homes and, in some cases, their pets. Concerned that these abandoned animals might spread disease or contaminate humans, officials tried to exterminate them.

And yet, a population of dogs somehow endured. They found fellowship with Chernoby lcleanup crews, and the power plant workers who remained in the area sometimes gave them food. Today, hundreds of free-ranging dogs live in the area around the site of the disaster, known as the exclusion zone. They roam through the abandoned city of Pripyat and bed down in the highly contaminated Semikhody train station.

Now, scientists have conducted the first deep dive into the animals’ DNA. The dogs of Chernobyl are genetically distinct, different from purebred canines as well as other groups of free-breeding dogs, scientists reported Friday in Sci-

ence Advances. It remains too soon to say whether, or how, the radioactive environment has contributed to the unique genetic profiles of the dogs of Chernobyl, scientists said. But the study is the first step in an effort to understand not only how long-term radiation exposure has affected the dogs but also what it takes to survive an environmental catastrophe. The project is a collaboration among scientists in the United States, Ukraine, and Poland, as well as the Clean Futures Fund, a nonprofit based in the United States that works in Chernobyl. The nonprofit, which was established in 2016, began as an effort to provide health care and support to power plant employees, who still work in the exclusion zone. But the organization soon realized that Chernobyl’s canine residents needed help, too. Although the dog population boomed during the summer, it often crashed in the winter, when food became scarce. Rabies was an ongoing concern. In 2017, the Clean Futures Fund began holding veterinary clinics for the local dogs, providing care, administering vaccines, and spaying and neutering the animals. The researchers piggybacked on these clinics to collect blood samples from 302 dogs living in different locations in and around the exclusion zone. (©The New York Times)

Last week, Hungary announced that it will be moving its embassy in Israel to Jerusalem, a move regarded as a gesture to Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu from his Hungarian counterpart Viktor Orban. The two reached an agreement on the matter in recent days, with the details hashed out during intensive talks between Foreign Minister Eli Cohen and Hungary’s top diplomat Peter Szijjarto. This action will make Hungary the first European Union member state to open an embassy in Jerusalem. Netanyahu has long had close relations with Orban, who has been in power since 2010. Their bond has further tightened since Netanyahu’s return to power after the general election in November. During a visit to Israel in 2019, Orban promised to establish a trade office with “diplomatic status” in Jerusalem, which opened several months later.

“This is a very exciting moment for us because it’s the first European dip-

lomatic mission opened in Jerusalem in many decades, and three Hungarian diplomats are going to be assigned to this office for trade purposes,” Netanyahu said then at the opening ceremony. “That’s important for trade, for diplomacy, and for the move that Hungary is leading right now to change the attitude in Europe toward Jerusalem.”U.S. President Donald Trump recognized Jerusalem as Israel’s capital and moved the U.S.mission there in 2018. Budapest has in recent years been Jerusalem’s staunchest supporter in the European Union, blocking several efforts to issue statements critical of Israeli policies. For instance, in 2020, Hungary was one of the only countries that did not publicly speak out against Israel’s plan, since scuttled, to unilaterally annex swaths of the West Bank.

In August 2021, Orban lamented in an interview with Fox News that Netanyahu’s election loss was a “challenge” for him and praised the Israeli leader as a “good friend” of Hungary. “When he was in power, he always invested a lot of energy in having a good relationship with central European countries,” he said. After Netanyahu’s Right-religious bloc won parliamentary elections last year, Orban tweeted: “What a great victory for Benjamin Netanyahu in Israel! Hard times require strong leaders. Welcome back!” He attached a picture of himself holding Netanyahu’s new memoir.

Marathon Moments

Megan Cassidy is on the move. The Florida woman is now the proud owner of a new Guinness World Record title after she ran 23 ultra-marathon runs–31.1 miles–

To Infinity and Beyond

in a 23-day period. The 41-year-old ran the mega marathons from December 17 until January 8, Guinness Confirmed.“Running every day like that, it’s not so bad because you keep up with it,” Cassidy told the Oceola News-Gazette. Even so, she admitted that it wasn’t so easy.“There are days it got kind of lonely,” she said. “But I’d wear a bib telling about what I was doing, and people loved hearing about it,” Cassidy said she completed her runs in the Lake Nona area due to the quality of the trails. Interestingly, one of the most difficult

parts of her attempt was making sure to take in enough food.“It was hard to eat enough calories in the first few days,” Cassidy explained.“Your brain tries to stop you from doing this so it tells you that you’re not hungry. I had to tell my boyfriend to make sure that I ate at least a quarter of a pan of lasagna every day,” she said.

The previous record was 22 days. Cassidy says that she probably could have gone past 23 days, but she needed to go back to work. She’s on the run.

On Thursday, SpaceX and NASA launched a fresh crew of astronauts on a mission to the International Space Station, kicking off a roughly six-month stay in space. The mission—which is carrying two NASA astronauts, a Russian cosmonaut, and an astronaut from the United Arab Emirates—took off from NASA’s Kennedy Space Center in Cape Canaveral, Florida. The Crew Dragon, the vehicle carrying the astronauts, detached from the rocket after reaching orbit. After about one day of maneuvering through space, it linked up with the space station. Thursday’s launch marked the second attempt to get this mission, called Crew6, off the ground. The first launch attempt was grounded last Monday by what officials said was a clogged filter. During the launch broadcast, officials had reported that ground systems engineers made the decision to call off the launch with less than three minutes on the clock. The engineers said they detected an issue with a substance called TEA-TEB, a highly combustible fluid that is used to ignite the Falcon 9 rocket’s engines at liftoff. The issue occurred during the “bleed-in” process, which is meant to ensure that each of the Falcon 9 rocket’s nine engines will be fed with enough of the TEA-TEB fluid when it’s time for ignition. The problem arose as the fluid moved from a holding tank on the ground into a “catch tank,” according to NASA. Benji Reed, SpaceX’s director of crew mission management, said that reviews of the data found that the rocket probably would have taken off without a hitch despite the clogged filter, though flight controllers didn’t have enough data during the countdown to be certain.“That’s not how we want to launch people,” Reed said during a postlaunch news conference on Thursday. “We want people to know for sure that it’s going to be okay.” There was no problem with Thursday’s launch.

This mission marks the seventh astronaut flight SpaceX has carried out on NASA’s behalf since 2020, continuing the public-private effort to keep the orbiting laboratory fully staffed. The Crew-6 team on board includes NASA astronauts Stephen Bowen, a veteran of three space shuttle missions, and first-time flyer Warren “Woody” Hoburg, as well as SultanAlneyadi, who is the second astronaut from the UAE to travel to space, and Russian cosmonaut Andrey Fedyaev. Once Bowen, Hoburg, Fedyaev, and Alneyadi are on board the space station, they’ll work to take over operations from the SpaceX Crew5 astronauts who arrived at the space station in October 2022. They’re expected to spend up to six months on board the orbiting laboratory, carrying out science experiments and maintaining the two-decade-old station.

Busy Pesach Preparations at Tomchei LA Jewish Summer Camp and Retreat Center

Heavily Damaged in Running Springs Blizzards

porate retreats as well as schools and synagogues across the spectrum, who use the beautiful, rustic campgrounds to host meaningful programs and special Shabbat services. In the summer months, the campus is home to Moshava Alevy, a Jewish summer camp, where upwards of 450 campers and staff enjoy spirited, fun-filled summers, surrounded by the lakes and mountains of San Bernardino.

Because of the snow damage, the Dovid Oved Retreat Center has already had to cancel five retreats totaling over $100,000 in lost revenues – with the number of cancelations and lost revenues likely to grow. “Safety is our top priority now,” said Matanky. “We have already issued cancelations through this upcoming weekend and will reevaluate once the roads are open, the State of Emergency is lifted, and we are able to properly assess the damage.”

The Dovid Oved Retreat Center, home to the Moshava Alevy Summer Camp, was severely damaged by the recent blizzards, that dumped upwards of 12 feet of snow on parts of the San Bernardino Mountains.

“Thankfully, despite the incredibly challenging conditions, all of our staff is safe,” said Avi Matanky, executive director of Bnei Akiva of Los Angeles, “however, we are now learning of the devastation to our campus.” The local staff was able to report that the dining hall collapsed under the weight of the snow. Because of the heavy snow and gas leaks in the area, they were unable to complete a full evaluation of the site, but they expect to see further damage to the campus.

The Dovid Oved Retreat Center, located in Running Springs, and run by Bnei Akiva of Los Angeles, is occupied

“We are committed to safely accommodating our future retreat guests as soon as possible and we fully expect to be completely operational in time for Moshava Alevy summer camp,” said Matanky.

“The Dovid Oved Retreat Center is extremely grateful to all the first responders in Running Springs and San Bernardino County. Our thoughts go out to our Running Springs neighbors and year-round residents who are continuing to feel the effects of the blizzard,” said Matanky.

With the campus facing millions of dollars in damages, and significant lost revenues, Matanky said, “Bnei Akiva will continue to provide updates on the status of the campus and will soon begin an emergency campaign to support this very important community asset.” For more information, please contact Avi Matanky at (310) 248-2450 ext. 101 or amatanky@bneiakivala.org.

This Pesach season, Tomchei LA will be assisting over 4,000 individuals totaling over 560 families in our community. Over the next few weeks, dedicated and selfless volunteers will be helping Tomchei LA distribute over 2,700 food packages that include 20,000 lbs. of chicken and meat, 15,000 lbs. of fresh produce, 2,500 lbs. of Matzah, 2,000 dozen eggs, and thousands of dry good items. The average cost per family for Tomchei for food is $500, retail value, whereas if the family would be shopping in the store, it would be well over $1,800. Our budget for this Pesach season alone is over $500,000.

dler sets. The items are distributed to over 475 families in a discreet and dignified manner, with scheduled appointments, personal shoppers, and dressing rooms. The average cost per family is $500 which has a retail value of over $1,500.

Through the benevolence of a very generous donor, Tomchei LA will also be giving tickets and parking passes to Knotts Berry Farm for all the families with children under the age of

The Tomchei LA Store Credit Program will be assisting over 340 families with over $200,000 in store credit, where families can shop at the Kosher store of their choice with dignity. Our incredible One-of-a-Kind Clothing team led by Shaindy Maryles, Tzirel Landau, Rochel Haberman, Tziporah Coronel, and Linda Mirman will be distributing over 5,000 articles of brand new beautiful handpicked clothing. The items include Women’s, Girls & Toddlers; Dresses, Tops, Skirts, Robes, and, PJs as well as Top quality Men’s & Boys’ Suits, Shirts, and Tod-

16 for Chol Hamoed. This would cost a family of 6 over $350.

All in all, the retail value of the assistance we are providing this Pesach for the average family is close to $4,000. That goes a very long way in helping a family that is already struggling to cover their basic bills.

With the cost of living soaring on all fronts, we have to make sure that none of our neighbors get left behind.

Without the generous support of our donors and volunteers, we would not be able to make this happen. It’s Our Community. It’s Our Responsibility.

Roof Collapses on Camp-grounds Dining Hall

YAYOE Moms’ Night Out

Friendship Circle’s Purim On Safari

their tricks.

Everyone also got to experience the mitzvahs of Purim, with a sensory-friendly family Megillah reading that brought the story of Esther to life. The Purim seudah was also wild and delicious, with exotic foods and drinks that tantalized the taste buds and added to the festivity atmosphere of the day.

Moms of 1st-3rd grade girls took a break from their Purim preparations to enjoy a fun, meaningful evening at Young Israel of Hancock Park.

While the women partook in a delicious spread of sushi and salads, Morah Eti shared inspiring words of Torah about Purim, masks, gratitude, and simcha. Morah Eti asked each woman to choose something to do for Hashem for the next month. The evening continued with soulful singing, followed by spirited Adar dancing. The moms then enjoyed dessert while they decorated t-shirts for their daughters.

Thank you to everyone who worked hard to prepare this beautiful evening. Everyone had a wonderful time!

Purim on Safari was an incredible celebration that brought together over 60 families, creating a wild and exciting atmosphere that made this special day even more unforgettable. From the moment everyone arrived, there was a sense of excitement and anticipation in the air, and the festivities didn’t disappoint!

As the live band featuring Rabbi Michy and friends took the stage, the crowd erupted in cheers and applause. The music was infectious, and soon everyone was on their feet,

dancing and swaying to the beat. The energy was contagious, and the joy and happiness on everyone’s faces were simply infectious.

The highlight of the night was the wild animal show. The crowd gasped in amazement as a monkey leaped onto the stage, followed by an alligator, a fox, and a mink. The animals were so exotic and beautiful, and it was incredible to see them up close and personal. The children were especially thrilled, and their faces lit up with wonder and amazement as they watched the animals perform

Of course, no celebration would be complete without some crafts, and the safari crafts were a real hit! From animal masks to safari cameras and the interactive Purim and safari-themed I-spy bottles, there was something fun for everyone.

Overall, Purim on Safari was an incredible event that brought together families and friends for a day of joy, excitement, and celebration. It was a true testament to the power of community and the importance of coming together to celebrate the things that matter most. Everyone is left with memories that they will cherish for a lifetime, and already can’t wait for next year’s Purim celebration!

CANDYLAND at Maimo!

two Bat Ami Emissaries, Israeli young ladies volunteering to enrich our children’s year by bringing a little slice of Israel to our school and community. This year, they outdid themselves! Special thanks to our Bat Ami, Shani Shitrit and Noa Kroizer, for all of their hard work and creativity. It was DELICIOUS!

Moms Spa Night for Friendship Circle Mothers

drinks kept coming, adding to the luxurious atmosphere and making it a night to remember. Our Friendship Circle moms left feeling like queens, grateful for the opportunity to take a break from their busy lives and treat themselves to some well-deserved TLC. It was truly a night of joy and celebration, filled with laughter, love, and camaraderie.

Thanks to FantaSea Yacht and the amazing vendors who contributed their talents. It was an evening of pampering at its best.

The students at Maimonides were in for a treat this year as the entire school was transformed into Candyland. The hallways, chair cushions, ceilings, and walls were covered and disguised for Adar. The students were on a ‘sugar high,’ to say the least, from all of the fun activities throughout the week, and participating in these games and assemblies in a converted space added another level.

Activities this year included a Dance party led by DJ Yoav, Purim Jeopardy, Dress Up Days, Hamentashen Baking, and fun trips through the week culminating in a Purim Carnival. Each year we are grateful to have

Anight of pampering and relaxation was the perfect way to show some love to our wonderful Friendship Circle moms. From the moment they arrived, they were whisked away in luxury transportation to a beautiful yacht in Marina Del Rey. The stunning setting set the tone for an evening that was all about indulging in some much-deserved self-care.

Moms were greeted with warm smiles and given the choice to start with a relaxing massage or a beautiful manicure. The skilled therapists and technicians worked their magic, leaving our moms feeling refreshed and rejuvenated. The delicious food and

The 3 Mitzvot of Purim at Spivak!

munities while on the job, but he has a special relationship with our community because of the acceptance and warmth that the Emek Family has for every Jew. He also expressed his thanks for our partnership in support of the State of Israel.

The evening concluded with a delectable dessert reception. To our guests’ delight, chocolate mousse and fruit parfaits lined the dessert tables, and they were also treated to a unique scotch and cigar presentation on the outdoor patio. Tremendous gratitude goes to Mrs. Sandra R’bibo for producing such a spectacular event, and to all our Trustees, whose presence and involvement made the evening so magical.

Students at Spivak Hebrew Academy celebrated Purim by experiencing all of the three mitzvot of Purim: Megillah, Mishloach Manot/ Matanot La’evyonim, and Mishteh! The students started their Purim week of festivities with a special gathering to view a real Megillah and hear portions of the Megillah read by Rabbi Gabriel Elias, Head of School. The Early Childhood students watched Rabbi Elias and Cecelie Wizenfeld, Director of the School, unraveling the Megillah to show the way the Megillah scroll is rolled out.

Next, the students prepared Mishloach Manot, food baskets, to exchange with each other throughout the day. Each student prepared an additional Mishloach Manot to sell. All proceeds from

the sale would go to a donation for Matanot La’evyonim, money for the poor to fulfill the mitzvah of the Purim seudah meal. The fifth-grade students sold all of the Mishloach Manot and made a profit of over one hundred dollars, which was donated to Tomchei Shabbos on Purim day!

The students then enjoyed a very silly and fun Shushan Purim dress-up day! Students came to school in costume and enjoyed various Purim activities, including Purim Jeopardy, puppy petting zoo, and reptile shows. Students enjoyed a Purim play performance by the 3rd and 4th grades. Additionally, all of the Elementary students gathered together to have a Mishteh, feast lunch, followed by a group Birkat Hamazon, and a very exciting teacher costume contest! The Spivak Hebrew Academy students enjoyed experiencing and fulfilling all the Purim Mitzvot!

Shalhevet Lady FireHawks Win Championship Game!!!

that feat in California. Unfortunately, last year the Shalhevet girls’ team fell short of their ultimate goal of winning the championship but dedicated themselves to getting back to the championship with a shot at redemption.

It was a whirlwind 72 hours for the Shalhevet Girls Varsity basketball team. After celebrating Purim with a schoolwide Megillah reading and Purim party, and a day of delivering Mishloach Manot, the Lady Firehawks took the court in front of a rabid, costume-wearing, home crowd.

With cheers of “Al HaNisim” and “Mishenichnas Adar” from the fans in attendance, the Lady Firehawks won a physical hard-fought game. Led by senior guard Talia Tibi’s eurostep, Arielle Grossman’s dead-eye shooting, and Yalee Schwartz’s all-around play, the Firehawks maintained a small lead the entire game before pulling away at the end double-digit win.

basketball team and energetic fan base are the only outwardly observant Jews that many of their opponents will meet gives the interactions on the court an added layer of pressure and Jewish pride.

basketball powerhouse and a force to be reckoned with in the local California basketball scene - regularly beating schools with enrollments upward of 2000 students.

This was no ordinary game. It was the semifinal playoff game against local powerhouse Campbell Hall with a trip to the State Championship in Sacramento on the line. This would not be their first trip to the finals as the team made it to the State Championship in Sacramento last year, the first Jewish school to accomplish

With anti-semitism feeling more present than ever in the lives of our communities, it is more important than ever that we find ways of educating those around us to understand that Jews aren’t some sort of caricature based on the stereotypes and canards peddled by antisemites. The knowledge that Shalhevet’s girls’

Just 24 hours after celebrating at a Shushan Purim talent show, Firehawk Nation made their way to Sacramento for a pre-Shabbat Championship game. Blearyeyed fans - students, parents, and other supporters - boarded 6 AM flights from LAX - ready to cheer on their beloved Lady Firehawks. The game is a rematch of last year’s championship game and a chance for redemption. The Firehawks are fortunate to have an incredible coaching staff, led by Jewish Hoops America perennial Coach of Year candidate (and twotime winner) Ryan Coleman.

Coach Coleman always has his teams prepared to take on the Goliaths of high school basketball. Under his leadership, Shalhevet, a school of 250 boys and girls, has become THE national Jewish

The final did not disappoint. A hardfought battle that ended with the Firehawks winning 50-46. The Shalhevet girls jumped out to an early lead, shooting 53% from the field in the first half including 3 of 5 from long-distance. The San Domenico Panthers kept it close with physical defense and many offensive rebounds. Fans from both teams were raucous and supportive throughout. The young women who played were truly remarkable and left it all on the floor - giving everything they had. It is quite clear that the Firehawks and their fan base made a true Kiddush Hashem through their actions on and off the court. At the press conference after the game, junior sharpshooter Arielle Grossman was quoted saying “We know we are playing for much more than Shalhevet, we are playing for the entire Jewish community.”

Speed Dating Event a Success!

generously provided all drinks for the event as well.

Despite the weather, the singles all arrived. They had some time for some delicious food, drinks, and mingling with live music. Then it was game time. Participants met a new person and rotated every 3 minutes. Adeena and Aviva were busy getting the crowd moving and getting to know the singles. The energy in the room was tangible, and many great conversations took place.

Remarkable Siyum Celebrated at the LINK Kollel

ers at the Siyum - finished a difficult Masechta, such as Eruvin, by himself. Others learned b’chavrusa a small Perek in Tractate Shabbos. All were determined not to let the momentum of Simchas Torah ebb away.

There are many types of matches. Shidduchim, friendships, business partners, and even matchmakers. Adeena Halberstam and Aviva Huss, two long-time volunteer matchmakers, on opposite ends of Los Angeles recently collaborated on ideas for a singles event. Adeena is a matchmaker on SawYouAtSinai and AdoptaShadchan and Aviva is a matchmaker on YUConnects. After recognizing their shared energy and vision for an event, the two women got to work.

They decided on a speed dating event catering to Modern Orthodox Jewish singles both ashkenaz and sephardic between the ages of 25 and 35. First, they publicized the event through various platforms. The response was overwhelming. The event reached capacity very quickly.

Adeena and Aviva sought out sponsors to keep the costs low and make the event extra special. They also screened all potential participants to ensure they met the necessary demographic criteria. The event bridged the gap and helped singles from the valley to the city meet in person.

The two women finalized the logistics and finishing touches. However, the forecast of significant rain had the duo scrambling for a last-minute indoor venue. They reached out to Michael Bernstein of the Cask, who graciously shared his chic venue. He

After the speed dating portion of the evening ended, there was more opportunity for mingling and dessert, which lasted until close to midnight. Before leaving each single was asked to fill out a survey of who they would be interested in meeting again. Adeena and Aviva spent the next day following up with attendees. Adeena and Aviva were thrilled that were many mutually approved matches. These singles are now connecting again as a result of this event.

The success of their first event inspired Adeena and Aviva to plan another event for singles after Pesach. They feel blessed to have had the opportunity to create meaningful connections within their communities and look forward to more events in the future. Stay Tuned!!

These matchmakers can be reached at: Adeena Halberstam: Matchesbyadeena@gmail.com & Aviva Huss: Avivaconnects18@gmail.com

On Sunday evening, February 26th, 23 men celebrated the completion of Seder Moed in Gemara at the LINK Kollel. Dozens of their family members and friends attended the gala banquet that the Kollel tendered for this special occasion.

The genesis of the Siyum was a clarion call issued by Rabbi Moshe Brull, the Assistant Rav of the LINK Shul, in the midst of the fervent dancing on Simchas Torah. He challenged everyone to demonstrate their true love of Limud HaTorah by committing to finishing the 12 Masechtos of Seder Moed in a short time frame. Amongst the 23 intrepid volunteers were LINK Avreichim, veteran Bnei Torah who learn and daven at LINK, and relatively new Balei Teshuva who had never finished a Perek in Shas, let alone an entire Masechta! Learning individually and b’chavrusa, they finished the entire Seder Moed. Some, like Rabbi Dr. Daniel Agress – one of the speak-

Rabbi Asher Brander, Dean and Founder of LINK, gave the keynote address at the Siyum. He emphasized how momentous this was for the development of the Kollel community and why it was so necessary to make such an exquisite

On Taanis Esther, a few hours before the start of Purim, children received a fun-filled preview of the Megillah at LINK. Dozens of young children were alternately mesmerized, dazzled, and humored by the noted educator, Rabbi Aharon Mikhail. He encapsulated the various details in the Purim drama with a unique slideshow presentation. He also gave out prizes for those who could answer his questions and added lots of humor to his unconventional rendition of the Megillah. And, of course, there were plenty of opportunities to make noise for Haman!

banquet to show proper Kavod HaTorah. His words were echoed by Rabbi Brull, who was the driving force behind the learning and the beautiful ambiance of the Siyum. All the men thanked their wives and children for allowing them to take the extra time to complete their limudim. The evening ended with stirring live music and spirited dancing. Many of the participants look forward to the next project of Limud HaTorah to be organized by the Kollel.

Creative Children’s “Megillah Leining” at LINK

On a

Tin Foil Fun

Mushky Yiftach

Rebbe’s Stories

Go Complain to the One Who Made Me

Rabbi Mordechai Dubin

There is a bit of time before our kitchen gets turned over into a Pesach tin foil spaceship, but why not have some fun with this shiny flexible material?

Supplies:

1-2 pieces of tin foil

Scissors

Candle holder (optional)

Instructions:

Step 1: Cut a few slits into your tin foil sheet. 1 slit on the bottom middle and 2 slits on the top.

Step 2: Roll both sides gently toward the center, like rolling a Torah scroll.

Step 3: Round the middle section on the top to form a round head.

Step 4: Form your flexible figure into whatever pose you desire.

Step 5: You can use the candle holder to form a hat or skirt, etc.

Step 6: Get creative with extra pieces of foil.

Step 7: Subscribe to “onarollcrafts” on YouTube for more

When Elazar, the son of Rabbi Shimon Bar Yochai, was a student in the Yeshiva, he spent all his time learning Torah. After many years of hard work, he became a Rabbi and a great Talmid Chacham. At that time, there was a town searching for a new shul Rabbi, and Rabbi Elazar was chosen for this very honorable position.

When the time came for Rabbi Elazar to travel to the town, he gathered his belongings and began his journey. Along the way, he was thinking about all the honor that he would receive when he would arrive at his new position. He imagined that all the people would gather on the streets, the children would be waving flags and the band would be playing festive music as they welcomed their new Rabbi. He was also thinking about all his great achievements and how he was chosen above all the other great Talmidai Chachamim for this honorable position.

The man who had been embarrassed by Rabbi Elazar turned to the crowd and asked, “Who is the great Rabbi and teacher that you are shouting about?” The people responded, “It is the great Rabbi that is standing behind you!” The man replied, “If you call this man a great Rabbi then I hope there will never be another Rabbi like him!”

“Why do you say this?” the people asked. The man told them everything that Rabbi Elazar had said to him. The people of the town asked the man to please forgive Rabbi Elazar. The man told the people that he would only forgive him on the condition that he will never behave like this again. From that day on Rabbi Elazar tried his best to treat everyone in a loving and accepting manner.

This story is taken from Meseches Taanit 20a.

Questions for Discussion

To book a craft

contact her at onarollcrafts@gmail.com

Suddenly, his thoughts were interrupted by a greeting, “Shalom Alaichem, Rebbe,” the voice called out. But the greeting did not sound respectful. It sounded as if someone was making fun of him. Rabbi Elazer turned to the man and saw that he was sticking out his tongue at Rabbi Elazar. Rabbi Elazar angrily said to the man, “You are so ugly! Is everyone in your town as ugly as you?” The man looked terribly embarrassed and said to Rabbi Elazar, “If you don’t like the way I look then complain to the One who made me!” Rabbi Elazar realized that the man was not speaking disrespectfully, nor was he making a disrespectful face. This was how the man actually looked and as a result of his misshapen face, his speech was also affected.

Rabbi Elazar jumped down from his wagon and begged the man’s forgiveness. But the man would not forgive him. “I will not forgive you until you go to the One who made me and complain to Him about the ugly man that He created.” Rabbi Elazar continued to ask the man’s forgiveness until they reached the town. Everyone was waiting excitedly for their new Rabbi. The children were waving their flags and the music played joyfully, and all the people were shouting, “Welcome, our new Rabbi! Welcome our great teacher!”

1. How could a great Talmid Chacham like Rabbi Elazar say such a mean thing to another person?

2. Do you think it was nice that the man who had been embarrassed by Rabbi Elazar told the people what Rabbi Elazar did?

3. Do you think that Rabbi Elazar learned from his mistake?

Rabbi Mordechai Dubin is a Rebbe at Gindi Maimonides Academy. He is the author of three illustrated children’s books, I’ll Never Forget Yerushalayim, I Believe, and I Know 6; and has produced four Musical CD’s for children, I Made This World For you, Let My People Go, Al Shelosha Devarim, and Hashem is Always With Me.

awesome content!

Mushky, aka the “Duct Tape Lady”, is a duct tape artist and lover of crafts who is always On A Roll coming up with something new and exciting. Mushky believes that creativity and connection are 2 really important things to take with you throughout life. Crafts build confidence, teach problem solving, and encourages “Out of the box” thinking. She currently teaches 3rd grade in Bais Chaya Mushka LA and is an adjunct professor at Sara Schenirer College. You can check out more awesome projects on her YouTube channel, onarollcrafts, or follow her on instagram @onarollcrafts

event

Junior Individual Pull-Apart Monkey Bread

Ingredients

2 pounds of pizza dough (I use Trader Joe’s premade pizza dough).

6 tablespoons margarine

2 1/2 tablespoons cinnamon

2/3 cup sugar

Directions:

Glaze:

3/4 cup powdered sugar

2 tsp of pareve milk

1 tsp softened margarine drop of vanilla

Equipment:

muffin liners, muffin tin.

Preheat oven to 350 degrees, and place liners in a muffin tin.

1. Divide the dough into 48 quarter-sized balls.

2. Whisk the cinnamon and sugar together in a bowl.

3. In a separate bowl melt the margarine in a microwave.

4. Dip each ball of dough into the margarine.

5. Transfer the ball into the cinnamon sugar mix, making sure to coat all sides.

6. Place 3 balls in each muffin liner.

7. Bake at 350 for about 10-12 minutes.

8. While baking- combine powdered sugar, pareve milk, a drop of vanilla, and softened margarine.

9. Whisk until smooth and drizzle over cooled monkey bread.

Enjoy!!!

Makes about 16-20 delicious individual monkey bread.

If you want to share a story, recipe, D’var Torah, or something creative with us, we would absolutely love it! Please send them in to editor@thelajewishhome.com and write “Kids Section” in the subject line

Mishkan Masterpiece

Thank you Zander

for sending in your Mishkan, built creatively with furniture!

Parsha Challenge

Please send us your creation of the KOHEN GADOL in all his regalia, to be entered in a raffle for a special prize! It can be a lego creation, a drawing, or made out of food!

RIDDLE ME THIS

As a master text messenger, your job is to figure out what ^*$%@#&?! means. The nine letter text message code can be translated into two English words that are opposites. What are the two words?

To assist you, each symbol stands for one of five letters:

! stands for Y, E, G, P, or T

@ stands for F, B, A, Q, or T

# stands for R, E, A, N, or Z

$ stands for F, E, N, S, or H

% stands for S, T, Y, M, or W

^ stands for P, D, E, H, or C

& stands for U, K, H, T, or B

* stands for O, J, G, I, or Z

? stands for E, L, D, N, or C

CELLPHONE FACTS

• Cell phones went on sale in the U.S. in 1983 and cost approximately $4,000.

• In 2012, Apple sold more than 340,000 iPhones per day, which is around 4 per second.

• Cell phones have 18 times more bacteria than toilet handles.

• Smartphones have more computing power than the computers used for the Apollo 11 to land on the moon.

• 70% of mobile phones are manufactured in China.

• More than 90% of adults have their mobile phone within arm’s reach all the time.

• More than 4 billion people own mobile phones. But only 3.5 billion use a toothbrush.

• 90% of text messages are read within 3 minutes of receipt.

• In 1985, 45-year-old communications researcher Friedhelm Hillebrand defined the length of a standard text message. He typed random sentences on his typewriter and almost all of them were under 160 characters long.

• According to Guinness World Records, Sonim XP3300 Force is recognized as the toughest phone. It survived an 84-foot drop without any operational damage.

• The Philippines is ranked number one globally in usage of text messages with about 1.4 billion text messages being sent every day.

• Apple co-founder Steve Wozniak was the first owner of the phone number 888-888- 8888, but it proved unusable as he was receiving over 100 wrong numbers a day, mostly from babies playing with phones.

• The average person unlocks his or her cell phone 110 times a day.

• The average American cell phone user will have about three unused or outdated cell phones in possession.

• Most Americans will only use their mobile phone for about 1216 months before getting a new one.

• Texting came into existence 21 years ago.

• The first photo to be shared using a cell phone was taken by Philippe Kahn in 1997. He sent pictures of his daughter Sophie from the maternity ward. Kahn is a French inventor who developed the world’s very first camera phone.

Answer: Construct and Dismantle

WHAT’S ABOUT

BY PINCHOS FRIEDLANDER

“Money isn’t everything,” they say. But money isn’t nothing, either. Any way you look at it, money is a critical component of life – not something we can afford to ignore. As one wisecrack goes: “All the happiness in the world can’t buy you money.”

But that is universal. What is unique about the Orthodox Jewish world with regards to the topic of money? And why is it important to talk about it? And last, but certainly not least, is there a spiritual side to earning money?

A PODCAST IS BORN

Around two years ago, Yaakov Langer founded a podcast network, which he named “Living LChaim.” The podcast rapidly gained traction on the Jewish scene and is constantly expanding. Originally, Yaakov focused his interviews on inspiring figures in the Ortho dox Jewish world and what they can offer the community in terms of wisdom, encourage ment, and, well, inspira tion. At one point in his work, delving into public issues and discussion, he became aware of a void in the communi ty.

And that was the topic of money.

Yaakov noticed two paradoxical phenomena. On the one hand, many in the frum community were struggling with finances. And a big part of the struggle was simply not knowing where to turn, what to do, and where to go. There was a lack of knowledge of how to navigate the realm of making and keeping a living. On the other hand, there was a certain stigma of talking about the topic openly. Yes, people can go on and on about their business, their endeavors, and sometimes their lavish lifestyles, but often, the heart of the subject is deliberately avoided. People hesitate to discuss their struggles and their doubts and are slow to ask for help. Worse yet, we often tend to paint a false picture of our financial situation, presenting an image of being well-to-do, while borrowing money we have no idea how we will repay. As one of the guests on “Kosher Money,” Naftali Horowitz relates, he once saw a young man parking a luxurious Range Rover and then the owner admitted to him that he barely could afford to fill its tank up with gas! Making a living was never a simple endeavor, but there is something uniquely challenging about the modern-day business world.

The hyper-fast pace of the digital, super-connected world, the

crowded field of competitors that connectivity has created, the unprecedented level of sophistication in almost every field, and the turnover rate for new technology, processes, and even society’s mindsets is a never-ending, and often ultra-stressful, rat race.

To top it off, an Orthodox Jewish life is by and large way more expensive than a secular one. From tuition to weddings, from kosher food to clothing, and often multiplied by a much larger family than the typical, secular, Western size, there is almost no compari-

busy

and successful people are glad to give of their time and money to help and guide beginners or otherwise struggling families and individuals – from gemachim to help start businesses, to mentorship organizations such as The Jewish Entrepreneur (JTE), which help aspiring entrepreneurs and guide them in the right direction, to Achiezer and the OU’s Living Smarter Jewish, helping with budgeting and smart spending, as well as many individuals helping individuals outside the context of an organized “organization.” But awareness is key. In order to take advantage of these resources, you have to know they exist and how to find them.

son. (Sorry, I didn’t mean to scare you. We’ll talk about bitachon soon.)

On the bright side, as Orthodox Jews, we are there for each other. Many

And so, Yaakov turned to his brother Eli and invited him to board the podcast train and branch off into a podcast focused on helping and mentoring young Jewish adults with income-related topics. Eli had a background in finances – between his bachelor’s degree in the field and his experience in real life. And so, Yaakov, Eli, and Zevy Wolman over at the Orthodox Union helped create a new show named “Kosher Money.”

“KOSHER MONEY IS THE BIG BROTHER, THE PERSONAL MENTOR MANY OF US NEVER HAD. THE SHOW BRINGS ON GUESTS WHO HAVE “BEEN THERE DONE THAT” AND ARE SOLID – SOLID IN THEIR KNOWLEDGE AND WISDOM AND SOLID IN THEIR INTENTIONS.”

Kosher Money proved to be wildly YouTube alone. And their list of viewers is not limited to Jews. Despite the fact that they are primarily geared for our audience, ultimately, their message is human-to-human, and anyone can relate to it. In fact, Kosher Money has already collected 117,000 subscribers (!), many of whom are non-Jews.

WHAT IS KOSHER MONEY?

Kosher Money is the big brother, the personal mentor many of us never had. The show brings on guests who have “been there done that” and are solid – solid in their knowledge and wisdom and solid in their intentions.

Eli and Yaakov are very careful in screening their potential guests. They want to ensure they bring to the table someone who is genuinely looking to help the community, not to promote themselves or their businesses. In fact, a red flag for them is when someone recommends himself or herself to appear on the show. And Eli keeps his ear to the ground. His podcast is very interactive, and he gets constant feedback and suggestions from listeners. He then chooses guests and focuses his questions based on the interest of the listeners.

Some of the guests featured include investing guru Eli Fried; author of the best-selling book Thou Shall Prosper Rabbi Daniel Lapin (a friend of popular show host Dave Ramsey, as well as a show host in his own right); and Naftali Horowitz of JP Morgan Wealth Management, among other prominent figures on the Orthodox Jewish financial scene.

The podcast guides, educates, and encourages newbies to pros on many fundamentals of parnassa topics. If you want a job, there is an episode where Eli discusses with business consultant Ned Schoenfeld what are the available high-paying jobs and how to find them. In another episode, Andrew Singer, VP of a Fortune 100 company, shares advice on how to handle job interviews and what are the no-nos you should avoid.

He also gives a crash course on sales skills and techniques. Yet another episode was done with Eli’s close friend Mitchell Eisenberger, in which he shares tips for working your way up the career ladder in the workplace. Although Mitchell is not a high-powered executive, he has much in the way of personal experience, having gone through many ups and downs himself, and he has a lot of simple, practical advice, which is implementable and relatable, and listeners loved it. For example, he explains how you can keep track of your “wins” at work and then come to the boss at the end of the year or contract term with

FOLLOW-UP INTERACTION

Feedback from listeners and viewers is tremendous. Eli gets many messages from people who were directly helped by the show. And that is so valuable to him. Many of his guests receive hundreds of follow-up calls from people who want help in the areas they had discussed, be it budgeting, starting a business, home buying, or investing.

One guest, Stacey Zrihen from the Achiezer team, had discussed the crucial issue of budgeting on the show along with other practical issues regarding running a family’s finances. For the next two weeks, she received non stop calls and messages asking for help, which she responded to graciously, devoting her time free of charge, to help the community. Naftali Horowitz fields thousands of emails from people looking for advice, and he doesn’t charge them a penny.

Even guests who make a living from the advice and coaching they offer, such as estate planners, are happy to answer short basic questions free of charge.

Speaking of money, what do the founders of Kosher Money get out of

which is its true intended purpose. Our objective is to use and pursue money wisely and not fall into the trap of its uglier side. Indeed, a significant part of the podcast is devoted to this angle.

On one episode, Eli brought on super-popular YouTube Rabbi Manis Friedman (brother to superstar singer Avraham Fried, a.k.a Avreimel, a.k.a Avraham Friedman) in an episode devoted to the deeper and more spiritual side of money (and life in general), which turned out to be its most popular episode to date with over 1.2 million views and streams.

Eli also discusses practical halacha issues involving money and the modern business world with Rabbi Yosef Kushner, a leading authority on this topic. And he delves into hashkafic topics with OU’s Rabbi Moshe Hauer, such as how to balance bitachon with hishtadlus, women in the workplace, and tuition, as well as the topic of giving maaser from earnings.

A SPORTS BACKGROUND

Thinking of going the entrepreneur route? Noam Wasserman has wisdom to share on this topic so that you don’t jump in blindly. Tzvi Pirutinski from PCS of Lakewood discusses transitioning into the workforce, how kollel families get by, and other related topics.

Listeners also learned that ensuring your money is transferred to your inheritors after “one hundred and twenty” is not always as simple as you might think. If not set up right while the parent is alive, children or other inheritors can face an uphill battle to prevent a lot of the money from being lost to the government. An episode on life insurance was also extremely popular, with many people realizing their coverage left a lot to be desired. Health insurance also had some surprises for some people, who were not aware they were paying for coverage they did not need.

There’s even an episode with Rabbi Binyamin Babad from Relief Resources, on the intersection of money and mental and emotional health. Visiting Kosher Money, you suddenly discover subjects you never realized were a “thing,” analyzed by experts, with many important points brought up, pointed out, and explained.

their show money-wise? Guests who appear on Kosher Money do not charge for their time, nor are they charged for being part of the podcast. As for Yaakov and Eli themselves, Kosher Money runs a few ads on their show, which, in addition to the revenue they get from YouTube, helps cover their operating expenses. Whatever profit is left over is largely put back into the pot, to help them expand even further.

Eli and Yaakov are careful even with their advertisers and avoid running ads for shady ventures, like get-rich-quick and the like. Though it’s “just an ad,” they like to take responsibility for all material that goes out to the public through them.

A SPIRITUAL SIDE TO EARNING A LIVING

As believing Jews, we know that money has a spiritual dimension, too,

Eli Langer grew up in Brooklyn, NY, and attended Yeshivas Chaim Berlin. (Fun fact: in addition to his brother Yaakov, he has two other brothers: Avraham and Yitzchok. So his family covers all the Avos, although we’re not sure where “Eli” fits in there.) He received a BA in finance at Touro College, which, as mentioned, gives him a background in discussing money-related topics. He then got a job at CNBC at the sports desk. The focus of the show was the intersection of sports and money. Eli’s job was helping reporters leverage their social media accounts. At

that time, social media was still a new concept, and journalists needed the training to maximize its power. Eli was the only Orthodox Jewish man in the office, and he became known as the “guy with the yarmulka.”

Eli’s work was mainly behind the scenes, and so he was rarely “on TV,” but on occasion, he did appear partially, among the staff, in the wide shot before the commercial would begin.

Eventually, though, Eli’s family grew, and his expenses grew along with it. He joined up with Aron’s Kissena Farms, becoming their social media

“AS HE SAYS, BREAKING THE STIGMA, THE TABOO STATUS OF THE TOPIC OF MONEY, IS LIBERATING. AND LEARNING NOT TO FEAR BEING HONEST ABOUT IT AND OPEN TO SEEKING HELP IS REFRESHING.”

Kosher Money - Dovid Bashevkin’s studio visit went viral when he coined the term Gvir Culture

Kosher Money - Kosher Money’s Eli Langer and Zevy Wolman interviewing personal finance guru Dave Ramsey at Ramsey Solutions HQ in Franklin, Tennessee for a special episode

Kosher Money - amazon caption

account manager, and eventually, Eli founded Harvesting Media, along with the owner of Aron’s, which Eli now heads. His work at Kosher Money is not a source of income for him; at least, not for now. His “payment” is the rewarding feeling he gets from knowing he has changed lives for the better and going to sleep knowing he made a real difference in other families’ financial stability.

For now, Eli looks forward to expanding his reach even more and stimulating more conversation around the topic of money in the Orthodox Jewish world. As he says, breaking the stigma, the taboo status of the topic of money, is liberating. And learning not to fear being honest about it and open to seeking help is refreshing.

THE ART OF THE INTERVIEW

As a fellow interviewer, I have become aware that interviewing is not always as simple as it may seem. To the untrained eye, it can seem like the interviewee is doing everything, and the interviewer is simply asking questions. Can’t we all ask questions? What skill does the job require? But, in fact, interviews don’t always succeed on their own. Some people are more inhibited; others can focus on the wrong things. It’s up to the interviewer to find the desired “juice” within their subject,

guide, and help him or her bring it to the fore.

I asked Eli how indeed he gets his subjects to give such quality interviews. He explains that it’s all about listening skills. Sometimes you feel like you just want to stick in your two cents or interrupt with another question, but that usually just shuts down the interviewee. And listening means active listening, taking an interest, and interacting with the flow of conversation which the interviewee is leading.

Eli comes prepared with a list of questions he would like to focus on, based on his own judgment, as well as the input of his listeners/participants. When needed, he can gently steer the interviewee back to the topics and questions his listeners want to be answered. But he lets the interviewee go off in their own direction, too, up to a point. If the interviewee rambles, and spends too much time on a topic or segment Eli feels is not so relevant, he can simply edit it out later, as the show is not live. In reality, though, that rarely happens.

I asked Eli if he has had any disaster interviews or segments of interviews. He says that thanks to the rigorous

screening and his preparation ahead of time, that has never happened so far. Before the show, he checks to make sure the guest has a good “flow” and advice to share. He is also in touch with the guest to discuss what the main focus will be. Sometimes, the guest will send a list of questions they want to address, but Eli will cut a considerable amount out, in accordance with the feedback of his listeners.

Interestingly, the most popular episodes have not so much been the ones with clear-cut practical advice but rather the ones which are more spiritual or conceptual and those which are story-based. For example, the episode with Rabbi Lapin, although low on actionable instruction, provides a spiritual angle to the quest for parnassa, and explains why historically Jews tend to out-perform their non-Jewish counterparts in attaining prosperity (25% of the Forbes 100 List are Jews), and describes what Rabbi Lapin feels is the Jewish perspective

on attaining wealth. That episode was a particularly big hit.

“Give a man a fish and you feed him for a day. Teach him to fish, and you feed him for a lifetime.” As Jews, the idea of being there for each other is ingrained in us. Often, you will find Jews helping their competitors establish themselves in business and sending them customers. By helping others, and by recognizing that parnassa comes from Hashem, we transform the gritty and sometimes dark pursuit of making a living into a holy endeavor. Ultimately, in the context of a Jewish approach, “money” can indeed be “kosher” –and that is what Eli, Yaakov, and their guests are doing. And that is what the viewers and listeners will be inspired to do as well.

“BY HELPING OTHERS, AND BY RECOGNIZING THAT PARNASSA COMES FROM HASHEM, WE TRANSFORM THE GRITTY AND SOMETIMES DARK PURSUIT OF MAKING A LIVING INTO A HOLY ENDEAVOR.”

Rabbi Nir Yacoby

Parshat Vayakhel: Is Jewelry Vanity?

Your wife points to her ring and says “Wouldn’t it be nice to have matching earrings?” You wonder: isn’t “Grace deceitful and beauty vain?” You are not the first one to ask.

After the women donated their copper mirrors for the construction of the tabernacle, God related to Moses that these are the most favorite of all materials donated. Confused, Moses asked, how is an instrument that is used to celebrate vanity even permitted, let alone become God’s favorite?!

God answered in להקיו that while women can use mirrors to pander to vanity, in the case of these women, they used the mirrors to “endear themselves” to their husbands.

Your wife needs to feel attractive, and the Torah clearly states that you do that by buying her clothes and jewelry.

You’re lucky your wife voiced a specific desire. Be grateful for it. She saved you time hunting for a gift. Buy her nice earrings within budget for Shalom Bayit.

Parsha Pekudei

The basic lesson in this week’s Torah reading is accountability. G-d demands from Moshe and the others who formulated and created the Tabernacle in the desert to account for all the material that was donated by the Jewish people for that purpose. The last piece of silver that was donated had to be accounted for, but Moshe was distressed that he could not account for 1,000 measures of the silver. He finally remembered that this donation of silver was used for constructing hooks that bound the tapestries of the Tabernacle together. The hooks must “shout” to remind us of their presence and to make Moshe’s accounting complete and accurate.

Accounting is a very painstaking project. Most people view it as bordering on boring. Nevertheless, there is no commercial enterprise that can successfully exist without good and accurate accounting practices.

The financial accounting in our Parsha regarding the materials that were used in the construction of the Tabernacle is a template for proper human behavior concerning the use of resources in all areas of life. This is especially true in matters that border on religious institutions that are held to the highest of all standards and are to be above any suspicion of corruption. The Priest of the Temple wore garments that had no pockets and could not conceal any hidden items of value that might be removed from the Temple.

This overriding meticulous standard and value of accountability is not limited to financial matters. Judaism teaches us that we are all accountable for our actions – behavior, speech, attitudes, and even thoughts. We were created as being responsible creatures – responsible to the Creator and to the other creatures that exist with us on this planet. We are given talents that are unique to each one of us. The challenge that is put before us is how those talents and abilities can be used for good and noble causes. There are many who think that the gifts that they have been given are for their exclusive use and that there is no need or obligation to share them with others. They are sadly mistaken in this view. People are accountable for what they have, as they were for the supposedly insignificant amount of silver that was used to construct hooks that kept the tapestries together.

King Solomon states in Kohelet that one should realize that all actions and behavior will eventually be weighed on the scales of heavenly justice. We live in a time when accountability, to a great extent, has been replaced by excuses, social engineering, economic, and psychological theories. All of these are used only to avoid the issue of accountability. To be human is to be responsible, and that is the message not only of this week’s parsha, but of everything in Judaism.

Shabbat shalom.

Rabbi Berel Wein

Rabbi Nir and his wife Atrian give regular classes on Shalom Bayit. His popular 3-minute podcast is funny and draws Shalom Bayit ideas from the Torah portion of the week. To register: ShalomInComics@gmail.com

Getting Stuck on Purim Vibes

Yoel Halpern

Wow! What a Purim!

I did things a bit differently this Purim. For starters, I fully embraced the idea of getting dressed up for the Megillah reading with my kids. To be honest, I am a bit self-conscious when in costume, but I wanted my kids to see me LIVE Purim.

We first went to YICC and enjoyed the great vibes and an awesome Purim carnival. We heard Megillah at Adas Torah and had some much-needed

food while the kids were entertained by all of the wonderful programming going on. I started, of course, feeling really self-conscious in my costume. I took a moment to tell myself the following message: “It’s okay to

data tables which we fed into route efficiency software which in real time laid out our shaloch manos route. We had a team in place if we were running late, to come and pick up the slack. Picture lots of logistics.

This year, before we left the house, I made a l’chaim or two. We pumped up the music and drove off (of course, my wife was the one driving). We headed into the hood and just started visiting people. I made a point to go in

with my kids and not just have them deliver for us. Also, I wanted to make a l’chaim everywhere I went. So I was feeling goooood and the whole run was really pleasurable. Zero pressure. We got home with time to spare for the seudah and I

feel self-conscious. You are wearing a ‘Thank You Hashem’ Jumpsuit, a bekishe, a curly wig, and a matzah yarmulka!” I stopped asking myself why I was self-conscious and surrendered to the discomfort of the feeling. I accepted that in certain situations I will feel self-conscious, and just like that, the feeling disappeared once accepted.

After getting the kids to sleep, I went to a chilled Purim farbrengen. Every year, I feel like I am chasing a feeling. I go from one place to another looking for the proper Purim vibe that reminds me of my childhood Purims in Far Rockaway. This year a bunch of us decided we were just going to sit around a table with some cholent, poppers, and drinks. No musicians or DJs, just our own sweet voices a cappella style. Almost everybody shared Divrei Torah or a story. For the first time in a long time, I had no feelings of FOMO. It felt like we were doing the Avodah of Purim as they did in the shtetl.

The next morning, I had an awesome Shacharis. Before Purim, I really asked Hashem to help me connect and feel present. Hashem replied, so to speak, “ “Give me a Shacharis and I’ll give you the world” (1010 WINS reference for all the New Yorkers). Coming out of shul, I felt the day in my bones.

One of my gripes with being an adult on Purim is the Shaloch Manos run. In the past, we planned two weeks in advance. We had spreadsheets and

was able to say some Tehillim. I am not a big Tehilim Zugger (sayer), but it hit the spot in a big way. Big thank you to Dovid Hamelech for putting all of that together.

The seudah was mamash in the clouds. I was zoche to dine with Rabbi Rose and Rabbi Bensoussan. The energy starting out was low, as some of us were working to get back to the state of “ad deloh yadah”. Every 15 minutes or so there was a noticeable increase in energy. By the end of the night, we were in the clouds. Such a mix of people and backgrounds were present, and I feel like we gave Hashem nachas.

I didn’t want to suffer PPD (Post Purim Depression), which is the feeling of heaviness coming down from all the simcha. I also hit another farbrengen after the seudah just to close out the day and ensure a smooth landing back to reality. My bracha on Purim is that we should be “stuck” with the feeling of Purim all year. We are “stuck” on so many things in life. Why can’t we get “stuck” on Purim?

ity sweeping through LA. Yoel lives with his wife and three children in LA.

Yoel Halpern is a businessman, publisher of The LA Jewish Home, and a true Chassid at heart. Originally from Far Rockaway, NY, Yoel has always yearned to bring some of his fondest childhood memories back to life in the Los Angeles community. With that in mind, Yoel, along with many friends and local Rabbis, started the LA Mishmar, a movement of growth and vulnerabil-

“Such a mix of people and backgrounds were present, and I feel like we gave Hashem nachas.”

SAVE YOURSELF A TRIP TO URGENT CARE

Parent Parent 2

How to Get your Toddler to Stick to the Bedtime Schedule

323-829-5520 • 323-710-0893

Prior to Purim, we spoke about the importance of a bedtime schedule, but your children did not read the article, so they are still giving you a hard time sticking to the marvelous routine. Here are a few ideas to help them stay on track. You can try as many as you would like! But, here’s the catch: these ideas only work if you will not get upset or annoyed if they don’t work. (Not only are you getting your kids on a schedule, I’m asking you to be calm and positive throughout the process. As I said last week—superheroes!) If your child does go along with any of these tips, give them lots of positive feedback to signal to them that you appreciate their behavior.

Choices: Although you created the routine, can you find someplace to give your child a bit of control? You have a better chance of compliance when the child feels in control. For example, you can ask, “Do you want to take a fun bubble bath, or a warm, relaxing shower?” Or, “Do you want me to read you a book, or tell a sto-

Make it fun: Add fun to your routine, whatever that means for you and your kiddos. It could be playing follow-the-leader, Simon says, having a race, singing a silly song, or doing a dance. The possibilities are endless. So, instead of commanding your child, “Go take a shower!” you can say, “Let’s play follow-the-leader to the shower.” Yes, you will have to actually play a bit before the shower, but eventually you’ll make your way there with one happy child following behind.

Problem solving: This is for an older child. Sit down with the child and tell them the facts and ask them for advice. For example, “I need you to be in bed by 8:00 (Fact). How can we make that happen?” (Advice). They might have some creative ideas; get them a reading light, put on an alarm, use a sound machine, to name a few… You can then try some of their ideas. If you do implement any of these solutions and the child still does not comply, then he may lose those new privileges.

These are just a few ideas to start you

Sports Clinics, Tournaments, Swimming, Late Nights, & Maccabiah Style Events

(First-Aid

ry?” Of course, they are allowed to answer, “none!” At that point, you can enforce the routine or try another technique.

Teaching: You can deliver an entire interesting, stimulating lesson, on their own level, of why it’s important for them to brush their teeth, have a schedule, go to sleep, etc. Make sure you know the facts and have the answers ready because your kids may be smarter than you would have anticipated.

Asking questions: For the younger kids, this would look something like, “Do you know how to put on your pajamas all by yourself?” Or, “Do we brush our teeth in the kitchen?” This will hopefully produce some laughter as well as pajamas on and clean teeth.

off; the opportunities are endless. The goal is to infuse your bedtime schedule with positivity, making the experience smooth and enjoyable for the whole family. Yes, even you might come to enjoy it yourself!

I will leave you with some food for thought: Does trying out these different techniques take a lot of energy? Yes, it does (again, superheroes, I wasn’t exaggerating). However, the alternative, which is getting upset and screaming, does too. You’re the parent—you choose.

Chumie Unger, RN, BSN-BC

Rochel Scheinberg, RN, BSN, PHN

Chani Heyman is a parenting coach who has been giving parenting classes, based on the teaching of Rebbetzin Spetner, for over 9 years to hundreds of mothers across the US. You can reach her at chaniheyman@gmail.com

Chani Heyman

“But, here’s the catch: these ideas only work if you will not get upset or annoyed if they don’t work.”

Iremember watching my fouryear-old daughter twirl in circles again and again just for the sheer joy of it. Her dress flared, her arms spread, and her hair flowed. I would be flooded with mixed emotions. My heart would sing with her joy, her happiness, and her freedom, and simultaneously ache with the knowledge that she likely wouldn’t always be dancing as a free spirit. Soon, I knew, she would grow older and experience an unforgiving world. A world that wouldn’t make her feel like a princess and wouldn’t tell her that she is pure, whole, and worthy. This joy and unquestioning faith in her own inner wealth would be questioned and challenged. The weight of this thought and the deep desire to protect her from the outside clouded my happiness in these moments.

Brené Brown describes this experience as “Foreboding Joy.” In her book, Daring Greatly, Brown explains that it is human nature to harbor a deep fear of the future unknown. We wait with bated breath for the other shoe to drop, expecting that something will happen. Because there always has to be a ‘something.’

However, this seemingly everyday experience and thought process is rooted in many beliefs. There is a belief that bad things always have to happen because everyone suffers in their own way. There is a belief that my daughter will experience criticism and judgment. There is an expectation that this will affect her and shape how she perceives herself, and that she will never again experience this pure joy as she is experiencing it at the moment. Are all of these beliefs true? Are they serving me well? I can answer that… Well, no, they are not.

Believing that everyone has to suffer somehow in this world is not a Jewish belief. It is a victim mentality and an entirely unjewish and unG-dly concept. G-d doesn’t want anyone or anything to suffer. He is not a G-d of Wrath who wreaks havoc and mayhem on humankind. He is a Benevolent G-d that we cannot comprehend. He is a

Embracing the Humble Truth

immensity of the gift. Let’s step into the truth.

Sometimes it feels like my whole world is spinning; it’s dizzying to imagine all the details that G-d created in this world just for me to fulfill my purpose here. I can step into His Unconditional Love for me and stay there, spinning around for the sheer joy of it. I know He is watching, just as a mother watches her

Hindi is a certified Relationshift coach based in Los Angeles. She is passionate about relationships and selfgrowth. She educates women on the Torah’s perspective of marriage at her workshops and retreats and helps women around the world through her coaching program. Hindi lives with her husband and their four children in Los Angeles.

G-d who loves without reason, without justification, without condition… and sometimes that confuses us. But why? Why does He love me? It makes no sense! I know me and I am undeserving of His love. I know what I do and what I don’t do and I don’t think I deserve it!

It is much easier to believe in a G-d of Wrath than to embrace the fact that you are completely undeserving of the entirety of your life. The air you breathe, the colors you see, the roof over your head, and the food on your table are all gifts from G-d to an undeserving soul. The waves that crest the ocean, the blades of grass swaying back and forth in each breeze that caresses the world. All of it is happening for you to appreciate, know, and feel loved. Instead, we call Him a G-d of Wrath and fear the next day. It is too hard to receive the Great Gift of Life considering the infinite humility it demands. Our ego cannot stomach the immensity of such a gift.

But what if we attempted to do so?

What if I was able to embrace humility even just momentarily throughout my day?

What would that open up for me in every area of my life? I’d be able to be more present, connected, and loving toward the people I care for most. I’d be able to truly look G-d in the “Face,” so to speak (without frantically wanting to look away guiltily).

What if we noticed something wonderful; the smile on our loved one’s face, or the snow-capped mountains in the distance, and felt the joy creeping tentatively out?

What if we saw the fear come up simultaneously and step forward to question the joy with its contrarian voice; “that smile will stop eventually,” or, “soon the mountains will just be dry and bare once again?”

What if we notice the fear come up, the fear that is just a mask for the Ego, and then just let it go? It’s just a voice. We don’t have to listen to every voice that rings out. Better to just listen out for that One voice. The voice that stems from Humility, the voice that steps into the joy and gratitude of a moment and stays there quavering from the

Hindi Kalmenson

Dini Gres

Dear D ni

father feel safe to open up and start to heal with you.

Dear Dini,

Fifteen years ago, when I was 17 years old, I left home and yeshiva to go to a rehab facility. I am a recovering alcoholic and as much as I fought it at the time, detox and rehab saved my life. The one downfall of my past is that I stopped talking to my father. My mother was very supportive and helpful, but at the time it seemed my father could not handle that his own child had these problems. I felt it was better to detach from him rather than always seeing or feeling his disappointment. This was my own choice, one I feel regretful about.

Since then, I am married with children, have built a beautiful life, and, thank G-d, am sober. For many years I just accepted that my father would be out of my life. Recently, I am feeling that hole and the emptiness of a lack of a father. I want to reconnect with him, but I simply don’t know how to start the conversation. Can you please advise me where to begin?

Dear Reader,

Your predicament is not a simple one. I am honored that you would trust me to answer this question. I am happy for you that you are sober now, as I know how difficult that is to maintain each day. It is something that you can and should be proud of, and continue to have the strength to protect it daily.

I am overjoyed that you had your mother’s support. As someone who has spoken to many mothers with children who

reality of life moving in directions we never could have imagined, our actions don’t always reflect our best selves. Now that you are a parent, I think that is something perhaps you could understand. Hopefully, you will be spared of this particular challenge, and whenever challenges do arise with your children, you will rise to the occasion.

The fact that you want to reconnect with your father is extremely commendable, and I could understand your uncertainty about how to approach this. There are various ways to go about it. With any approach, begin with humility and the goal of making amends by apologizing for the lost time. Your words should come from a place of love and not hate, with the recognition of where you came from and where you are today.

The third option is to go to both your parents with your wife. This group approach demonstrates how important family is to you.

I want to believe that your father will welcome you into his life and will be overjoyed to begin a relationship with you as an adult. However, having said that, I still want to advise you to proceed with caution. Relationships don’t happen overnight, especially when

the past behind him, remind yourself that you tried and that you can still love someone from a distance. Relationships are complicated and not everyone can have a comeback from a fractured past. No matter what happens, you always have your ultimate Father, HaKadosh Baruch Hu, who will always protect you and watch over you and your family.

I commend you for wanting this and for trying whatever measures you take to get your father back in your life. Big

are in and out of sobriety, I have seen firsthand how difficult and challenging this is for parents. It requires tremendous strength to navigate the addiction and rehab world and still be supportive of their children.

I understand that it may have been different for your father, and he may not have had the same strength or understanding to be supportive at the time that you were going through this challenge. No one can judge your father as to why or how he chose the path he did. All I can say is that the challenge affects different people in different ways. A father’s relationship with a son is different from a mother’s relationship with a son, no matter the challenge, especially when it comes to addiction. On any given day, parents are challenged to push past thoughts of angst for their children’s future. When faced with the

Three possibilities come to mind when I think of your choices. First, you could reach out to your father, and set up a time to talk face-to-face. I know that sounds scary, but the direct approach will give you time to prepare. If you go this route, sit down and make some notes on what you want to say. Keep your points concise and straightforward, with the goal in mind to resolve, reconnect and move forward. Once you can accomplish this and once you feel comfortable with your relationship, over time, you can go back and discuss more specific things from the past.

A second choice would be to build on the first choice by including a third party, such as a common Rav or therapist. Perhaps that will give you a little more anchoring and security to speak your truth, and approach him with less trepidation. And perhaps that will help your

they have been fractured. It takes time. It takes patience and understanding from both parties to want to get to a place where things are somewhat solid. I suggest that you constantly remind yourself what the goal is, and let your father know verbally that you are willing to have patience as the two of you repair and come back as father and son.

I hope it does not come to this, but in the event that your father cannot put

steps like these are what truly bring families back together and hopefully bring the Moshiach closer.

Adina (Dini) Gres is a wife, mother of 4 adult daughters, business owner, writer, speaker, and certified life coach. Through her role as owner of Financial Concierge LLC and coach for personal and financial clients, Adina recognizes that trying to get ahead without managing a healthy mentality is the primary reason blocking individuals from success. When working with her clients, Dini helps them understand how they themselves can change the narrative of their lives. You can hear more from Adina by listening to her podcast titled “Things I think you should know.” Adina also shares on her Instagram page @financialconcierge.

“Relationships don’t happen overnight, especially when they have been fractured.”

Lessons I Learned Along the Way

The Power of Encouragement: How Supporting a Friend or Loved One Can Help Them Succeed: Part 1

Idon’t have the data nor the statistics but I do have the life experience to know this: children and adults can survive almost anything when they have the support they need. If indeed it’s true that support can be so empowering, what should it look like and how can we quantify it so we can replicate it when needed?

I believe the key is that it’s more about what we think than what we say, and what we believe rather than what we do. Support isn’t a checklist. It’s an empathy and transference to another’s place that allows us to “feel” them. This type of support does not include judgment nor does it require solutions. They may be necessary at some point, but when a person is hurting and feeling despondent, encouragement, or lack thereof, will be the deciding factor of how much the situation will impact them in the long term. The following two scenarios reflect my perspective on this.

When one of my daughters was at the start of ninth grade, she had a falling out with another girl in her circle of friends. Overnight, the phone stopped ringing and all the rest of the friendships within that circle ended. As a social experiment, it was fascinating to watch, but as a parent, it was one of the most painful experiences my husband and I have ever endured. Yet, remarkably, that incident taught me that unconditional love and support can be a game changer. My daughter made wonderful new friends very soon after, and I wonder if this incident still lingers in her memory at all.

Disapproval and discouragement really hurt. A while back, a divorced friend of mine

confided in me about the numerous pain ful and judgemental comments she often had to endure. One, in particular, stood out: a neighbor asked her what aveira (sin) she had done to cause the divorce to happen. Presumably, this naive and

hurtful remark reflected the neighbor’s in security. She did not want to believe that such a misfortune could happen to any family, so by assigning it a cause, she felt more reassured that her family was safe from such a calamity.

We are quick to judge because we are human. Often it’s because we care so much. We want to help, fix or find a solution. Sometimes we are on point and our advice is well received. But, we should be mindful that there is a difference between advice and support. The people we love may want our advice, but they need our support.

No matter our circumstances, if we are alive, we have been challenged. Oftentimes, the most difficult moments turn out to be the seemingly insignificant incidents that surprise us with their intensity.

As young children and teenagers, it may be a struggle with a Rebbi, teacher, or a social dynamic at school. While we absolutely need the support of the grownups in our lives to get us through those hardships, we unquestionably need those allies even more in adulthood. We may often underestimate the necessity of receiving the proper assistance and guidance, or we may see it as a weakness or a lack of intelligence. Perhaps this type of thinking is what prevents us from properly supporting those around us in a meaningful way.

In our next issue, we will take a look at how we can bolster and empower those around us to be successful in meeting their challenges.

With over 30 years in education as a teacher and a principal, Mrs. Sheindy Gross continues her passion for education by creating a new platform called TEHILA, Torah Education with Heart in LA, for women and girls to receive adult education, camaraderie, and support. In addition to TEHILA, Mrs. Gross provides a myriad of educational opportunities for the community, such as dating and relationship mentoring, Kallah classes, and leadership consulting for educators. Mrs. Gross can be reached at sheindyg@gmail.com.

“Support isn’t a It’s

empathy and transference to another’s place that allows us to ‘feel’

Mrs. Sheindy Gross

Seder-tainment: A Practical Guide to Keeping Your Child Engaged at the Seder

very stressful for everyone in the family. If you are lucky enough to still be on speaking terms with your spouse, communication of desired outcomes and sensitivities is key! You can have the greatest ideas in the world, but if your spouse is not on the same page, it is a recipe for disaster.

Even though it’s the year 2023, we still don’t have a good mind-reading app. We have to have a space for two-way, non-judgmental communication to express hesitations and desires for the evening. (This should obviously be done during the Preparation stage and not in front of the kids!)

Practical Tips

Physical Comfort:

Surely, the most “Seder-tainment” at our Seder happens during the recital of the ten plagues.

For Blood, my father-in-law has a magic cup that is filled with red liquid in one compartment and clean water in another. The whole cup looks like it is blood, but when poured correctly only the pure water comes out (reminiscent of the Midrash that explains the Jews were not affected by the plague of Blood).

For Lice, I do a pepper/soap magic trick that shows how quickly the plague was removed as soon as God willed it.

Tapping the Spirit

Of course, the night is not designed to simply entertain our kids. The ultimate goal is to show them that Judaism is relevant, fun, and most importantly, meaningful. Judaism is not something we read about in textbooks. Rather, it’s something we taste, feels, and experience in our body, mind, and soul.

The Torah is filled with verses that highlight the primacy and central role of children in explaining the Passover story.

If you are lucky enough to be surrounded by children this year, you will be in a unique position to be able to fulfill the 64th mitzvah of the Torah. Here are some general “rules” and practical tips that have personally helped my family “Seder-tain” the kids in years past.

General “Rules”

Rule #1 - Have fun!

There is no other way about it. The night is not meant to be a boring monologue by the Seder leader with a bunch of archaic rituals. Constant engagement at all levels is the goal. Making something fun with kids is the easiest way to get their attention. Read on for practical examples.

(Have enough wine to loosen you up, but not so much that it will check you out!)

Rule #2 - Prepare, Prepare, Prepare!

An actor would never go on stage and read the script for the first time. We shouldn’t do it either! A review of the Haggadah before the Seder is critical. Take a couple of hours (with the permission of your spouse, of course!) to review the Haggadah you plan to use and highlight what you want to focus on.

A few days before the Seder, discuss with the kids what they can add to the night. Decorations? Songs? D’var Torahs? This can’t be left for the last minute.

Have contingency plans in advance— who will take care of the baby if she wakes up? Have an agreed-upon seating chart to prevent arguments. When is the ideal time to start? What parts should be cut out if things get out of control?

Rule #3 - Communicate

Pre-Pesach house preparations can be

Like all parenting advice, the Seder will instantly fail and have little effect if the child is not well-rested, properly fed, or physically uncomfortable. A pre-Seder snack for young ones goes a long way. Try as hard as you can to ensure everyone in the house, including Mommy and Daddy, has had some quiet rest time before the Seder.

‘Dressing to impress’ is highly recommended. It will allow the children to see that tonight is special. However, this should not be done at the expense of your physical comfort. Save that cute, tight, coarse dress

For the Fiery Hale, my father-in-law surprises everyone by throwing marshmallows and Red Hot candies all over the table. That’s too tame for me so I channel my inner pyromaniac and light up sparkling candles (from a pre-existing flame, of course!)

For the Wild Beasts, we throw around toy animals or surprise the kids with animal masks so they can run around and imitate the animals.

The key is constant surprises and suspense. I keep all the new tricks and snacks in a bag under the table and bring them out at different points of the night.

Through the stories of the plagues and salvation, we see that God is involved with every aspect of nature and our lives. By describing the hard times Jews went through as slaves, we show our children that in life there are struggles, but an Infinite Source is always there guiding us.

Perhaps, most importantly, by giving our undivided attention to our children, we show them they are an important and pivotal link in Jewish continuity.

Feel free to check out www.Sedertainment.com to download Pesach Games, Coupon Templates, and Video Workshop for even more ideas.

or a newly starched button-up shirt for another night!

Make the seating arrangements as comfortable as possible. Make use of couches, pillows—anything that will allow your family to appropriately lean, pique the children’s interest that tonight is different, feel like royalty, and most importantly be physically comfortable.

Mental Engagement

With the attention span of our generation shrinking by the day we have our work cut out for us. A strategic age-appropriate plan of constant engagement is necessary.

Less is sometimes more! In fact, our sages say that the Maggid portion should not be overly drawn out if restless children are present. Instead, opt for a shorter Seder and continue with adults only after the meal, if that is an option.

Active participation is the best way to engage. This can be encouraged with a ticket system or as simple as candy treats for rewards. Kids can actively participate by getting points and treats for singing Passover songs, showing off their artwork, or asking questions about Passover.

Many games can be played during and after the Seder that are sure to keep their attention. Our family favorite is building a pyramid with plastic cups!

“Judaism is not something we read about in textbooks. Rather, it’s something we taste, feel, and experience in our body, mind, and soul.”

Eman Esmailzadeh

Fry Day In The K tchen

Dini Klein

I never met a fry that I didn’t like. Frozen, homemade, curly, ridged, tater totted, or waffled; what is there not to love? That perfect inside texture, is soft and pillowy with an exterior crunch. It’s a party, plain and simple.

These homemade options are healthier versions of the traditional deep-fried potato. They will level up your game in terms of health and color, and they are wickedly easy to meal prep.

Parsnip and Turnip Fries are my favorite fry substitutes. We Prep + Rally these every so often in our menus! They look just like potatoes when prepared, so your kids won’t know that you made a change.

Carrot Fries are also a big hit in my home. I like tossing them with a splash of maple syrup and cumin spice before baking.

Sweet potato or butternut squash fries are more popular but no less delicious. You also have the option to add honey and cinnamon and go sweet with these ones!

TO PREPARE: Simply cut the above vegetables into matchsticks or wedges, season with olive oil and salt, and your favorite spices (optional). Bake in the oven at 425°F. Let these get crispy on the outside and tender on the inside.

The MVP of veggie fries, in my opinion, are Green Bean Fries.

If you’re trying to stay healthy, these green bean fries are here to save the day. They don’t require peeling or cutting, so that cuts the prep time in half. Serve with Homemade Ranch sauce and your whole family will enjoy dunking these crispy fries into a delicious sauce.

Green Bean Fries:

Ingredients:

1 pound fresh green beans, ends trimmed

1/2 cup breadcrumbs of choice

1/4cup grated parmesan cheese

Directions:

FAMILY MEAL PREP SYSTEM THE

1/2teaspoon salt

1/2teaspoon garlic powder

2 eggs, whisked

Preheat the oven to 400°F and line 2 large baking sheets with parchment paper.

Prepare a dredging station by pouring the whisked eggs into a shallow bowl. In another shallow bowl, whisk together the breadcrumbs, parmesan cheese, salt, and garlic powder.

Coat the green beans by dipping each one into the egg, letting any excess drip off, followed by tossing it into the breadcrumbs. Once coated, place on the lined baking sheet. Repeat with remaining green beans. Bake for 20 minutes until the fries are golden brown.

Ranch

Ingredients:

1 cup mayo

2 tablespoons fresh dill, minced

1 tablespoon fresh chives, minced

1 1/2 lemons, juiced

2 teaspoons minced garlic

Directions:

1 teaspoon garlic powder

1/4 cup unsweetened almond milk or milk of choice

-Pinch of black pepper

Whisk all of the ingredients together into a small bowl. If you want the ranch to be thinner, add 1 tablespoon of extra milk at a time until you reach desired consistency.

Finally a guide to delicious, family-friendly meals with less stress, less expense, and minimal time. Complete with essential advice for remixing leftovers, along with dozens of recipes for easy egg dishes, snacks, and sweets, Prep + Rally will alleviate weeknight meal time stress, once and for all.

photo credit: Dini Klein

Not So Fast On Student Debt Relief

Lou Shapiro

Whoever said TV is the best form of entertainment wasn’t paying attention to the U.S. Supreme Court’s docket. On February 28, 2023, the controversial Biden v. Nebraska and its companion case, Department of Education v. Brown were argued before the court, and their rulings are certain to make waves.

If you read the bill introduced by the Senate in 2001, which became the HEROES Act, you learn that the President declared a state of national emergency in response to the terrorist attacks of September 11, 2001. Additionally, the bill intended to create a precedent for future national emergency declarations by reason of terrorist attacks.

In 2020, while campaigning for pres ident, Joe Biden promised to cancel up to $10,000 of federal student loan debt per bor rower. After being elected president, he an nounced that he would invoke the HEROES Act to wipe out $400 billion in student debt. Several states sued Biden arguing that his executive action violated the separation of powers, as it exceeded what Congress con templated when it passed the HEROES Act.

As head of the executive branch, the President can issue executive orders, which direct executive officers or clarify and fur ther existing laws. The President has the power either to sign the legislation into law

or to veto bills enacted by Congress. The President does not have the power to unilat erally create law.

The HEROES Act, which was passed after the 9/11 terrorist attacks, grants the secretary of education the power to “waive or modify” a federal student loan program in order to ensure that individuals “are not placed in a worse position financially” be cause of “a war or other military operation or national emergency.” Biden argues the Covid-19 pandemic qualifies as a nation al emergency under the HEROES Act, but plaintiffs argue that Biden is stretching the law.

So, who is right? The answer can usu ally be found by looking at the “legislative intent” of the statute. The less a President’s action is consistent with the legislative in tent of a statute, the more likely the court will rule that it is an overstep.

“It’s clear that the intent of this law was to acknowledge those individ uals who put their lives on the line for the country by rewarding them with student debt relief.”

Are You Willing to Journey Into the Unknown?

Rabbi Shmuel Reichman

There is a story told of a man who was captured behind enemy lines during war. To his horror, he was sentenced to death by firing squad. However, the captain gave the man another option. He told him, “You can go to the firing squad tomorrow morning at 6 a.m., or, you can choose to walk through this door.” Feeling hopeful, the man asked: “What’s on the other side of that door?” The captain answered: “No one knows. All I can tell you is that there is some unknown power behind that door.” The man thought it over, and the next morning, when it came time to choose his fate, he selected the firing squad. After the shots rang out, the captain’s secretary asked him: “You’ve offered so many people the other option, and every time they choose the firing squad. What’s beyond that door?” With a look of dismay on his face, the captain answered: “Freedom! But people would rather face a known death than journey into the unknown.”

Walking Into the Unknown

When Hashem commands Avraham to leave his home and embark on a journey, Avraham is told “Lech lecha me’artzecha... Go for yourself, from your land…” (Breishis 12:1). This directive is quite strange. Avraham is told where to leave from, but he is not told his destination. What kind of journey lacks a destination? Generally, the destination, not the starting point, is most important. For example, imagine being invited to a wedding, but instead of being told where the wedding will take place, you are told only where to leave from. Good luck getting to that wedding.

The answer to this question lies within the words “lech lecha.” While this phrase is often translated as “go for yourself,” they can also be translated as “go to yourself.” Avraham was commanded to embark on a journey towards “himself,” towards his true and ultimate self. In a genuine journey to the self, we don’t know the destination, we don’t know where it will take us. All we know is where we’re leaving from, where we are right now. Only once we arrive, will we retroactively see where the journey was taking us all along. Of course, we have goals, destinations, and proposed directions, but anyone who has achieved anything of substance knows that the vision they once had is nothing like the actual journey they took. The goals create the process, but the actual journey transcends the limited goals that were used to start the journey.

This is why Hashem didn’t give Avraham a clear destination: in a journey to the self, all that we know is the starting point. The destination requires a courageous journey into the unknown. You don’t know what

you’ll find, the challenges you’ll face, what people will think, or if you will even succeed. So many people refuse to step outside their comfort zone, embrace challenges, to take the unpaved and uncharted path, the path towards greatness. Greatness, therefore, requires us to be courageous enough to journey into the unknown, to embark on the lech lecha journey to our true and ultimate selves.

Finding Your Unique Self

As we embark on this journey into the unknown, to our true selves, we must be willing to find our unique self that lies in wait. Each one of us has a unique purpose and mission in this world. This is why life can be compared to a journey at sea. Unlike dry land, where paths and roads can be paved, water has no pathways; the journey is a voyage through the unknown. While traveling on dry land, we can follow the path that others have paved. While traveling at sea, we must create our own path. There

to be actualized. Our job in life is to discover who we really are, and to express our latent perfection. Growth isn’t about becoming great, it’s about becoming you; learning isn’t about discovery, it’s about self-discovery. You are born as a masterpiece, masked by confusion; your job in this world is to uncover yourself. To do so requires a “lech lecha” journey. Instead of becoming a mirror, reflecting everything outside ourselves, we can become projectors. We can build something majestic and beautiful within ourselves and then express that outwards into the world. This is also the difference between thermometers and thermostats. A thermometer reflects its environment; the temperature outside determines its internal state. A thermostat, however, is unaffected by the external state of things. It first determines its desired reality within itself, and then expresses it outside, building towards that goal in its external environment. A true model of growth is where we first develop ourselves internally, and then express that out into the world.

The Torah Path

This model of growth, however, is only effective when undertaken within the frame-

work and guidance of Torah. The only way to find your greatness is to see yourself within a greater self, Hashem, the source of everything. Perhaps this is why a ship is called aniyah, a combination of the words ani and yud kei (Hashem’s name). The only way to journey towards yourself-ani, is when you are journeying to [and with] Hashem- yud kei. The journey to your “self” is also the journey towards Hashem, the Root of all self. May we all be inspired to follow in the footsteps of Avraham, and have the courage to embark on our own lech lecha journey, on our unique journey at sea, and discover who we truly are, and who we are meant to be.

Rabbi Shmuel Reichman is a bestselling author, international speaker, and the CEO of Self-Mastery Academy. He is also a business, executive, and leadership coach, with a unique approach based on Torah values and principles. His bestselling book, The Journey to Your Ultimate Self, serves as an inspiring gateway into deeper Jewish thought. After obtaining his BA from Yeshiva University, he received Semicha from Yeshiva University’s RIETS, a master’s degree in education from Azrieli Graduate School, and a master’s degree in Jewish Thought from Bernard Revel Graduate School, and then spent a year studying at Harvard as an Ivy Plus Scholar. He currently lives in Chicago with his wife and son where he is pursuing a PhD at the University of Chicago. To enjoy more of Rabbi Reichman’s content, to contact him, or to learn more about his services, visit his website: ShmuelReichman.com

are no landmarks on the ocean; there is just endless sameness. We can use the sky and constellations as guides, but the water itself gives no hint of direction, remaining completely formless. This is why the word for ani, the self, shares its root with the word for ship, aniyah; each of us is a ship in the middle of the ocean. There is no looking around to see which path others are taking; we can only forge our path by looking within, finding our own unique purpose, and then journeying toward the ultimate version of ourselves.

The Process of Human Growth

With this principle in mind, let us explore the process of human growth. Many people grow from the outside in. They look around at their friends, society, and the people around them, and then shape themselves to fit their surroundings. The clothes they wear, the food they eat, and the things they talk about all become a reflection of their external surroundings. In this model, a person is a slab of clay, and the goal of life is to fit as neatly as possible into the molds that society creates for you.

This is not the Jewish path, this is not the lech lecha path. Each one of us is created with our own unique potential, waiting

“The goals create the process, but the actual journey transcends the limited goals that were used to start the journey.”