EMOTIONAL & MENTAL MASTERY
“I’M GIVING YOU A GIFT. IT’S A BUTTER CHURN!” We were in an improv class, and Kelsey was my teammate. We looked at each other and started to laugh, thinking of the “gifts” we would give each other. I leaned over, pretend-scooped my gift off the floor and handed the invisible gift to her. Kelsey grinned. “Thank you!” she said, full of enthusiasm. “I just got a pet cow, and this will be perfect to turn her milk into cheese!” We were both laughing at this point. “A pencil sharpener! That’s perfect,” I said, “I’m just starting to write a new book and I only like writing with super sharp pencils!” We gave invisible gifts back and forth, grinning and laughing at the creativity of gifts and perfection. Tommy called a halt to the exercise. “OK, new rule. Same idea, tell them what gift you are giving, only this time, it has to be the worst thing you can think of. And the receiver still has to react as if it’s the greatest gift in the world, and tell why it is perfect.” The whole room started to laugh. “Oh boy,” I heard someone mutter, “I have so many terrible gifts to give!” Kelsey looked at me, and I looked at her. I quickly pantomimed thrusting a gift at her. “I have a gift for you, a dirty diaper!”
DIRTY DIAPERS... Kelsey gingerly took it from me, looking from me to the dirty diaper. “Thanks!” she said. I could see the wheels churning in her mind, and then she smiled. “I have been looking for the perfect way to get my husband out of his man cave to do yard work. Hiding this in his room is just the trick!” Back and forth, we gave terrible gifts. It seemed like the more terrible the gift, the more enthusiastically we received it. Squashed worms, a bucket of tar, a dead bird, dirty underwear—no matter what was given, it was received with creativity, each terrible gift the perfect solution to a problem we had. Finally, Kelsey squatted down and motioned holding something that was out of control. “Here,” she gasped, “I’m giving you a crazy monkey!” 24 | IAE | HOLIDAY 2015
We both burst into laughter, seeing this invisible crazy monkey in her hands. I reached out and grabbed hold of it and quickly moved over to my pretend tree in my pretend yard. “It’s perfect! My fruit tree is full of birds, and now the crazy monkey will help keep them away from the fruit!” Tommy ended the exercise and asked a simple question: “What did you notice about receiving a terrible gift?” Several of us raised our hands. “I noticed that no matter what I was given, I could find a use for it.” “I noticed that I actually felt joy about receiving things that challenged my creativity.” “I noticed that instead of feeling like I was getting the bad end of a deal, I was feeling pretty abundant with all these perfect gifts.” “I noticed that my attitude going into this exercise completely changed how I experienced it. If I was expecting terrible gifts that were useless, I would have received terrible gifts that were useless. If I expected a gift that was perfect, somehow, it became perfect.” Tommy smiled. “So much of our lives are affected by our expectations. And if we go into experiences expecting to find things for which we are grateful, that is exactly what we find.” Gratitude. It’s not something reserved only for the privileged. Gratitude is something we have access to every single day. A new client recently shared, “I hear what you’re saying, but my life is hard. I have had really crappy things happen to me, and it’s not so easy to forget them. Every day feels like a challenge,
not a gift. How can I possibly feel grateful?” I get it, I do. You work really hard to achieve your goals, but one day to the next, it feels like one step forward, two steps back. Your body doesn’t feel great, you have hard times in your relationships, you’re in a job you hate, or you don’t have money to pay the bills. The holidays are upon us and stress levels are rising. And yet, gratitude is still open to you, like a beautiful and shining path, if only you will take it. The first and best way to this pathway? A gratitude journal. Go out, get yourself a notebook or journal, and set it by your bed. Then, every night before you sleep, review your day and find 3 things for which you feel grateful. Write them down. It almost sounds too easy, to begin changing your life by writing down 3 simple sentences. But study after study has shown that focus on gratitude actually changes your neural pathways—instead of looking for the negative, your brain begins patterning into positive pathways, and soon, you feel happier, more content....and more grateful....in all parts of your life. So go ahead, accept that crazy monkey—whether it be the wrong-sized sweater, an unexpected house guest or a dental bill—and let your creativity turn it into a beautiful gift of deep gratitude in your heart. Happy and Grateful Holidays to you and yours!
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Lisa D is a Transformational Intuitive Master Healer with 2 Master’s Degrees and 25 years of c ommitted leadership to her country and community. She works with women from all around the world who are on the path of self development and are seeking wholeness. Lisa D has two spirit guides and combines 10+ healing modalities to help you remember, embrace, and love the woman you were born to be. Contact her at lisa@lisadalessio.com for more inforomation and to schedule your complimentary information session. Website www.lisadalessio.com