SINGLE OR IT’S COMPLICATED: Steps To Keeping The Blues At Bay This Holiday Season Well, Honeybuns, it's that time of the year again. The holidays are upon us and, like clockwork, our emotions are in full bloom. You're either singing Mariah Carey's "All I Want For Christmas Is You" or you're mumbling the lyrics to "I Want To Come Home For Christmas '' by Marvin Gaye under your breath. This season every year seems to call for a full-on reality check, a good, hard look in the mirror. Will I be alone again this year? Will I be spending another 365 days with someone who makes me stick to my stomach? Or, if you're among the blessed ones, is it time to pop some champagne because the holidays are about to be lit? Whether you're single, taken, or it's complicated, the holidays can be as tough as a three-day-old bagel. But, never fear, I'm here to offer you a "how-to" guide on navigating this festive chaos without falling into the pit of despair because your life isn't looking like a Hallmark movie. And let's be real, whose life actually does? For our single souls, this isn't a season to flood your mind with thoughts of why you're still single. You're fabulous, and here are five ways to make sure you remember that this holiday season: 1) Treat yourself: You're your own best date. Take yourself out for a fancy dinner, buy that expensive bottle of wine, or splurge on that gadget you've been eyeing. Girl, get the new dress and the shoes too. 2) Friendsgiving: Who needs a significant other when you have friends who love you? Arrange a friends-only holiday party and celebrate the love you share. Don’t forget to tell each other how much you appreciate them and oh yeah, you can’t forget the wine and the chocolate!!!!! 3) Volunteer: Give back to the community. It's a great way to spread joy and you might meet some amazing people while doing it. If nothing else, you will start to appreciate the great things about your life. 4) Self-care: Take a spa day, read a good book, or simply relax. You're under no obligation to be "busy" this season. Stop and smell the freaking roses. Okay maybe not, roses don’t actually smell like anything to me but that dish at your favorite restaurant smells really good. Solo dates are nicer than you think. 5) Travel: If you can, take a trip. Experiencing a new place can be a fantastic way to rejuvenate and gain new perspectives. You never know, you just might meet your Wow Factor. Now, for those of you who are taken but not exactly on cloud nine, here are five ways to ensure that you and your mate sail through the holidays with as little tension as possible: 1) Communicate: Talk about your expectations and fears. It's cliche, but communication really is key. Stop walking on eggshells and learn to express yourself to your mate. In a diplomatic matter of course. 2) Create new traditions: If old holiday traditions are causing stress, create new ones that you both enjoy. 3) Time apart: It's okay to take some time for yourself. You don't have to be joined at the hip. We all need a break from our realities every so often. 4) Be forgiving & considerate: The holiday season can be stressful for everyone. Be easy on each other. Take the time to talk to your mate and ask them how they are doing and wait for an answer. 5) Seek help: If things are really tough, don't hesitate to seek professional help. There's no shame in it. Therapy or a life coach can make a big difference in your life. Are you ready, Honeybuns?. The holiday season is here, and it's going to be a wild ride. But remember, whether you're single, taken, or somewhere in between, the holidays are about joy and love. And you, my dear, are deserving of both. You got this! It’s all in how you choose to move. LaTonya MeChelle
THE HEAT SEEKERS MAGAZINE 6
