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October, 2009

Ways to Maintain a Healthy Level of Insanity 1. During lunch time, sit in your parked car with sunglasses on and point a hair dryer at passing cars, and see if they slow down. 2. Page Yourself Over The Intercom. Don’t Disguise Your Voice. 3. Every Time Someone Asks You To Do Something, Ask If They Want Fries with that. 4. Put Your Garbage Can On Your Desk And Label It “In.” 5. Put Decaf In The Coffee Maker For 3 Weeks. Once Everyone has Gotten Over Their Caffeine Addictions, Switch to Espresso. 6. In The Memo Field Of All Your Checks, Write “ For Marijuana” 7. Finish All Your sentences with “In Accordance With The Prophecy.” 8. Don t use any punctuation 9. As Often As Possible, Skip Rather Than Walk. 10. Order a Diet Water whenever you go out to eat with a serious face. 11. Specify That Your Drive-through Order Is “To Go.” 12. Sing Along At The Opera. 13. Go To A Poetry Recital And Ask Why The Poems Don’t Rhyme 14. Put Mosquito Netting Around Your Work Area And Play tropical Sounds All Day. 15. Five Days In Advance, Tell Your Friends You Can’t Attend Their Party Because You have a headache.

16. Have Your Co-workers Address You By Your Wrestling Name, Rock Bottom. 17. When The Money Comes Out The ATM, Scream “I Won! I Won!” 18. When Leaving The Zoo, Start Running Towards The Parking lot, Yelling “Run For Your Lives, They’re Loose!!” 19. Tell Your Children Over Dinner , “Due To The Economy, We Are Going To Have To Let One Of You Go.”

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DOCTOR’S ADVICE

Q: Doctor, I’ve heard that cardiovascular exercise can prolong life. Is this true? A: Heart only good for so many beats, and that it... Don’t waste on exercise. Everything wear out eventually. Speed up heart not make live longer; that like say you can extend life of car by driving faster. Want live longer? Take nap. Q: Should I cut down on meat and eat more fruits and vegetables? A: You must grasp logistical efficiencies. What does cow eat? Hay and corn. What are these? Vegetables. So, steak nothing more than efficient mechanism of delivering vegetables to system. Need grain? Eat chicken. Beef also good source of field grass (green leafy vegetable). And pork chop can give 100% recommended daily allowance of vegetable products. Q: Should I reduce my alcohol intake? A: No, not at all. Wine made from fruit. Brandy is distilled wine. That means they take water out of fruity bit; get even more of goodness that way. Beer also made out of grain. Bottoms up! Q: How can I calculate my body/fat ratio? A: If you have body and you have fat, ratio is one to one. If you have two bodies, ratio is two to one, etc. Q: What are some of the advantages of participating in a regular exercise program? A: Cannot think of single one, sorry. My philosophy: No Pain...Good! Q: Aren’t fried foods bad for you? A: YOU NOT LISTENING!!! .... Foods fried in vegetable oil. How getting more vegetables be bad for you? Q: Will sit-ups help prevent me from getting a little soft around the middle? A: Definitely not! When you exercise muscle, it get bigger. You should only do situps if want bigger stomach.

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October, 2009

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October, 2009

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October, 2009

Howdy to all! Hope this finds all of the Texas Twister Fans doing great and enjoying the cooler weather, we sure are here in Pittsburg. Only had time for 2 recipes this month, been putting up squash relish, thanks to my neighbor(Jean) and her recipe and pear relish. Also been making pear bread. Will have to share those with you next spring when they get ripe again. Sure hope you enjoy these two recipes. Take care now and see ya next month. Aunt Pat ********************************************* Crispy Oatmeal Cookies servings: 36 Prep Time: 15 minutes Cook Time: 12 minutes Ingredients 1/3cup canola oil 3/4cup unpacked light brown sugar 3/4cup sugar 1eggs 1egg whites 1tsp vanilla extract 1 1/2cup white all purpose flour 1tsp ground cinnamon 1tsp baking soda 1 1/2cup Oats, rolled, old fashioned 1/2cup chopped pecans 1cooking spray Directions 1 Preheat the oven to 350 degrees F. 2 Use a large bowl, and stir together the oil, brown sugar, sugar, egg, egg white, and vanilla. 3 In a separate small bowl, combine the flour, cinnamon, and baking soda. 4 Add the flour mixture to the sugar mixture. Add the oats and pecans, mix well. 5 Coat a cookie sheet with non-stick cooking spray and drop cookie batter by rounded teaspoonfuls onto baking sheet. 6 Bake for 10 to 12 minutes, or until lightly browned. Remove from oven and let cool on wax paper. Nutrition Facts Makes 36 servings Amount Per Serving Calories 92.2 Total Carbs 13.6 g Sugars 7.3 g Total Fat 3.6 g Dietary Exchanges 1 Fat, 1/2 Other Carbohydrate, 1/2 Starch ******************************************** All American Fried Chicken Boneless chicken breast coated in pecans and lightly fried. Servings: 4 Prep Time:15 minutes Cook Time:10 minutes Ingredients 16oz boneless skinless chicken breasts, butterflied and lightly pounded (4-4 oz. pieces) 1/2cup chopped pecans, divided, 1/4 cup finely ground

Texas Twister and 1/4 cup coarsely ground 1eggs, beaten 4egg whites, beaten 2pinch black pepper, freshly ground, to taste 2pinch salt, to taste (optional) 2tbsp safflower oil (oil for frying) 1 Season the chicken with salt (optional) and freshly ground black pepper. Combine the eggs and egg whites in a bowl. 2 Dip the chicken into the finely chopped nuts and coat. 3 Next, dip the chicken into the beaten egg mixture, and then into the coarsely ground nuts, coating evenly. 4 Fry the chicken on medium heat until golden brown, approximately 4 minutes per side. 5 When removing the chicken, handle with care, and place on a paper towel to drain excess oil. 6 Season with salt (optional) and pepper to taste, and serve. Nutrition Facts Amount Per Serving Calories 338.3 Total Carbs 2.4 g Sugar 0.9 g Total Fat 20.6 g Dietary Exchanges 3 1/2 Fat, 4 1/2 Very Lean Meat


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MORE DOCTOR’S ADVICE Q: Is chocolate bad for me? A: You crazy? HELLO ... Cocoa beans! Vegetable!!! Cocoa beans best feel-good food around! Q: Is swimming good for your figure? A: If swimming good for figure, explain whales to me. Q: Is getting in-shape important for my lifestyle? A: Hey! ‘Round’ is shape!


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October, 2009

1880 - Most state laws provide for capital punishment, usually by hanging. Unfortunately, hangmen’s ignorance produced horrific scenes of slow strangling deaths and gruesome decapitations. 1881 - Dr. Albert Southwick, a dentist and former steamboat engineer, sees elderly drunkard touch terminals of electrical generator in Buffalo, New York. He is amazed at how quickly and apparently painlessly the man is killed and describes episode to friend State Senator David McMillan. March 29, 1889 - William Kemler kills his lover Matilda (“Tille”) Ziegler with an axe in Buffalo, New York, which was then known as :the “Electric City of the Future.” Spring, 1889 - Joseph Chappleau, convicted for poisoning neighbor’s cows, is first person sentenced to death under Electrical Execution Law. His sentence is commuted to life imprisonment. May, 1989 - William Kemmler is sentenced to death. 1889 - 1890 - Westinghouse funds appeals for Kemmler on the grounds that electrocution is cruel and unusual punishment. Edison and Brown are witnesses for the state. The appeal is denied, as are two subsequent appeals to the U.S. Supreme Court. 1890 - Edwin R. Davis, Auburn Prison electrician, designs an electric chair model which closely resembles our modern device, as well as elaborate testing procedures involving large slabs of meat. August 6, 1890 - Kemmler is executed in the electric chair at Auburn Prison, the first person ever to be executed by electrocution. The first application of current is botched and Kemmler does not die until the current is fired up a second time.

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GHS Junior Attends “G.A.T.E.” Program

Lacey Thibault, a junior at Greenville High School, recently attended Texas A&M University’s G.A.T.E program in Corpus Christi and was also awarded a $600 stipend to selected candidates. Thibault attended the program July 12- August 1. GATE is a free three-week summer educational program for talented high school students who are interested in teaching careers - especially in the fields of mathematics and/or science at the elementary or secondary levels. Participants spent three weeks on the campus of Texas A&M University-Corpus Christi enriching their educational skills, interacting with other talented teens, and learning from experienced master teachers. Students participating in GATE enrolled in a full-credit university-level teacher education course, which can give them a head start on earning college credit and preparing for the professional world. The program included field trips, films, guest speakers, mentorship from exceptional educators and firsthand teaching experience in “Kid’s College,” a summer program for elementary students. GATE was held on the island campus of Texas A&M University-Corpus Christi. The campus is home to state-of-the-art facilities, recreational opportunities, and a nationally-known and respected college of education.

Playing it Safe Parents reminded of flu prevention tips While there have been no reported cases of H1N1 Virus (Swine Flu) in Greenville ISD, the district is beginning the school year by reinforcing some timeheld tips for preventing this and other, more common illnesses. An outbreak of swine flu last spring caused the U.S. to issue a public health emergency. While there were

October, 2009

no known cases in the district last year or now, the district is doing everything possible to protect the health of our students. The Hunt County Health Department remains watchful along with regional, state and national health authorities, and information is constantly being provided to local medical community partners and schools. Parents can help out in prevention efforts, too, by taking everyday steps to help prevent the spread of all flu viruses. These include: • Cover your nose and mouth with a tissue when you cough or sneeze. Throw the tissue in the trash after you use it. • Wash your hands often with soap and water, especially after you cough or sneeze. If soap and water are not available, alcohol-based hand cleaners are also effective. • Avoid touching your eyes, nose and mouth. Germs spread this way. Teach your child to take these actions too. • Try to keep your child from having close contact (about 6 feet) with sick people, including anyone in the household who is sick. • Keep surfaces like bedside tables, surfaces in the bathroom, kitchen counters and toys for children clean by wiping them down with a household disinfectant according to directions on the product label. • Throw away tissues and other disposable items used by sick persons in your household in the trash. Symptoms of seasonal flu and novel H1N1 flu include fever, cough, sore throat, runny or stuffy nose, body aches, headache, chills and fatigue. Some people also may have vomiting and diarrhea. Anyone experiencing these symptoms should contact their family physician/health care provider.

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GHS Cheerleaders earn honors at national camp Members of Greenville High School’s Freshman, Junior Varsity and Varsity Cheerleading squads earned honors at the recent National Cheerleaders Association Camp held in Denton. All three squads earned bids to national competition, scheduled for December, and the Freshman and Varsity squads also won Performance Top Team in their divisions. The Junior Varsity squad won the NCA Spirit Award. The competition was held at the University of North Texas. Numerous team members were nominated for NCA All–American. Team members can earn nominations from areas such as tumbling, jumps, motions, dancing, stunting and leadership. Scoring high enough to make the All-American squad were Lacey Tenney (freshman squad), Hannah Himes, Sarah Kym and Chandler Bigby (junior varsity squad) and Taylor Putman, Alicia Antoine, Jessica Vowell, Lauren Shepherd, Jocelyn Hawkins, Emma Hollingsworth, Stefanie Sliger and Natalie Jenkins (varsity squad.) Monica Malone won All-American Mascot. The National Cheerleading Association serves as the sanctioning body for cheerleading.

Members of Greenville High School’s Freshman, Junior Varsity and Varsity Cheerleading squads earned honors at the recent National Cheerleaders Association Camp. Participating were, front row from left, Stefanie Sliger, Natalie Jenkins, Jessica Vowell, Alicia Antoine, Taylor Putman, Morgan Driggers, Nichole Draude; second row from left, Gabby Tucker, Lacey Thibault, Jocelyn Hawkins, Emma Hollingsworth, Sam Blakemore; third row from left, Chandler Bigby, Sarah Perkins, Hannah Himes, Sarah Kym, Jordan Gray; fourth row from left, Jasmine Sanders, Ashleigh Hall, Keri Porter, Mandy McKamie, Kaye-Lin Doty; fifth row from left, Cheyenne Little, Crystal Ramirez, Lacy Tenney, Hailee Tennant, Sara Matlack; sixth row from left, Haley Meador, Rosa Castillo, Alexandria Hall, Pamela Moore. Mascot Monica Malone is in front. Not pictured are Lauren Shepherd, Lindsey Carter and Lindsey Shepherd.


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QISD Homecoming 2009 Come One…Come All! One School…One Team – The Panthers! Bring YOUR Lawn Chairs!!!! All Wednesday & Saturday Events are NOW FREE to Attend!!!

Wednesday, October 21, 2009 2nd Annual FHS Community Bonfire and Homecoming Pep-Rally! FHS Parking Lot After Local Church Services

Saturday, October 24, 2009 1st Annual Hometown BBQ Cook-Off, FHS Parking Lot! 12:00 Noon – 2:30 PM $10 Entry Fee for Each Category! Best in BBQ Meat (any kind), Beans & Sauce! Trophies & Prizes! BBQ Plate Lunches! All Proceeds Benefit the QISD Education Foundation! (Foundation and Museum only groups to sell items at cook-off area before alum football game)

Friday, October 23, 2009 JMECC Homecoming Parade – 9:00 AM at Lytal Field! Come celebrate with our Early Childhood Center!!! 2nd Annual QISD Hall of Fame Induction Luncheon! Invitation Only – FHS Band Hall

1st Annual Alum Flag Football Game! 3:00 PM Odd vs. Even years! Registration starts @ 1 pm Pre Game – 2:30 - Alum T-Shirts on Sale (Sponsored by FHS cheer) FHS Practice Field at FHS (behind Multi-Purpose Facility) Cheer will be only group to sell drinks & more during Alum Games at the fields. 1st Annual Alum Tug of War Games! Current and Former students band Vs. choir, basketball even vs. odd years, volleyball vs. basketball girls, athletes vs. non athletes and more! Meet at the practice Fields behind the Multi-purpose facility at Ford High School! 1 – 2:30 PM

Friday, October 23, 2009 FHS Pep-Rally – FHS Gym 2:45 PM Pre-Game Ceremony – Lytal Field 6:45 PM FHS Panthers Vs. Rains Wildcats 7:30 PM Former Belles Perform at half-time!!! Saturday, October 24, 2009 2009 Homecoming Parade - Parade Line Begins – 8:30 AM Parade Start Time – 11:00 AM Calling All Groups, Graduating Classes, Former Queens and Kings and all Former Teams! FREE To Ride & Fun for ALL! Go through Butler Dr. that leads to Cannon! Parking at Cannon and Butler campuses! Hall of Fame Inducteeswill serve as Grand Marshals. Parade Route Starting at Cannon Elem, travel north on Spur 264, turnright on SH 276 through downtown. Turn right on Picadilly St. (by QISD admin. bldg.). Turn left on Richmond St. Turn right on Clardy Dr. and back to Butler campus.

Contact tiffony.hopper@quinlanisd.net for BBQ Cook-off and Parade forms. Contact bonita.hobden@quinlanisd.net to play Flag Football or to reserve a booth for the Fall Festival. Call (903) 356-1222 or 1602 for more information.

73rd Annual QISD Fall Festival – 4:00 PM FHS Parking Lot – Rent Your Booth Today! Games, food, prizes, and MUCH MORE! Raise money for your organization – Rentals are $25 school groups & $35 non-school groups! Sponsored by the Quinlan FFA. Cheer is only group to sell cold drinks – others can sell water! 1st Annual Homecoming Street Dance/Concert FHS Coach Parking Lot! 6:00 PM Featuring Quinlan Alum artists including Nashville Singer – Tommy Joe Wilson ‘90 & QISD’s Own Derek Sneed!!!!


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October, 2009

THE LEGEND OF STINGY JACK (Or why we call them Jack O Lanterns!)

As the story goes, several centuries ago amongst the myriad of towns and villages in Ireland there lived a drunkard known as “Jack the Smith” or “Stingy Jack”. Jack was known throughout the land as a deceiver, manipulator, and otherwise dreg of society. On a fateful night the Devil overheard the tale of Jack’s evil deeds and silver-tongue. Unconvinced (and envious) of the rumors, the Devil went to find out for himself whether or not Jack lived up to his vile reputation. Typical of Jack, he was drunk and wandering through the countryside at night when he came upon a body on his cobblestone path; the body with an eerie grimace on its face turned out to be the Devil. Jack in a somber mood realized this was his end, the Devil had finally come to collect his malevolent soul. Jack made a last request: he asked the Devil to let him drink ale before he departed to hell. The Devil finding no reason not to acquiesce the request took Jack to the local pub and supplied him with many drinks of alcoholic beverages. Upon

quenching his thirst Jack asked the Devil to pay the tab on the ale, this to the Devils surprise. Jack convinced the Devil to metamorphose into a silver coin with which to pay the bartender (impressed upon by Jack’s unyielding tactics). Shrewdly, Jack stuck the now transformed devil (coin) into his pocket, which also contained a crucifix. The Devil, unable to escape his form (bound by the crucifix) agreed to a demand of Jack that his soul be spared for ten years (in exchange for the Devil’s freedom). Exactly ten years senior to the date upon which Jack originally struck his deal, he found himself once again in the presence of the Devil. Same as the setting before, Jack happened upon the Devil and seemingly accepted it was his time to go to Hell for good. As the Devil prepared to take him to the underworld, Jack asked if he could have one apple, with which to feed his starving belly. Foolishly the Devil once again agreed to this last request. As the Devil climbed up the branches of a nearby apple tree, Jack surrounded its base with crucifixes. The Devil, frustrated at the fact that he been entrapped again, demanded his release. As Jack did before, he demanded that his soul never be taken by the Devil into Hell, the Devil agreed and was set free. Eventually the drinking and unstable lifestyle took its toll on Jack, he died the way he had lived. As Jack’s soul prepared to enter Heaven through the gates of St. Peter he was stopped. He was told that due to the lifestyle he had led, the life full of deceit, drinking, and sinful behavior, he was not permitted entrance into Heaven. Jack in a dreary state now went and stood before the Gates of Hades and begged for commission into underworld. The Devil, fulfilling his obligation to Jack, could not take his soul; to warn others he gave Jack an ember, marking him as a denizen of Hell. From that day on till eternity’s end, Jack is doomed to roam the world between the planes of good and evil, with only an ember inside a hollowed Turnip (Jack’s second favorite food, after rutabagas) to light his way. (Some countries still use turnips, but pumpkins are larger and more readily available in the U.S.) (taken from wikipedia.com)

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Photo (left): Middle school students all dressed up and lined up for the Middle School Dance sponsored by Middle School Student Council.

Photo (right): Over 50 parents, firemen, police officers, and community members attended an informative session by Carlos Cruz regarding drugs and their warning signs.

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Photo (left): 3rd grade teachers, Principal and counselor meet with the parents’ of Griffis Elementary 3rd graders.

Photo (right): Over thirty students in grades 9-12 particpated in a PSAT/SAT workshop presented by Knel Gandy.

CADDO MILLS SCHOOl BOARD

Thank you for the many hours that each of you devote in making Caddo Mills ISD a Great District!

About 150 Senior Citizens of Caddo Mills were honored Friday night, August 28, 2009 before the first home football game between the Caddo Mills Foxes and the Gunter Tigers. The evening started with a delicious meal prepared and served by the FCCLA sponsored by Mrs. Lacey Mills. Entertainment was provided by the CMHS Band, Flag Corp, Drill Team, and Cheerleaders. Each senior citizen left with a Senior Citizen Athletic Event Pass and a Caddo Mills Fox Cap. A great evening was had by all.

The Caddo Mills High School Band and Drill Team have been busy showing off their new uniforms this month. A combined Pre-Game show with QuinlanFord High School in honor of September 11 included the Band, Drill Team, Choir, Flag Corp, and Cheerleaders at the September 11 football game in Quinlan. The Caddo Mills High School Band also performed at the Cotton Bowl with the Texas A&M Commerce Band for the Harvey Martin Classic. In October look for the band to perform at the Mesquite Marching Festival, the NEXTEX Marching Contest, as well as the Region 3 UIL Marching Contest.


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Ruth Cherry Intermediate School Dedication September 13, 2009 Norris Ruth Cherry

Homecoming Court 2009

Norris Ruth Tanton was born on October 13, 1943, into a family of educators. Her father, Norris Tanton was superintendent at Commerce ISD for 16 years and her mother, Charlean Tanton was an elementary school teacher at Campbell ISD for 30 years. Ruth graduated from Commerce High School and went on to receive her Bachelor and Masters Degrees from East Texas State University in Commerce. Ruth majored in English and Business Education, earned her Masters in Elementary Education and completed post graduate studies for her Supervisor Certification. Miss Tanton, began her teaching career at Royse City ISD in 1965, where she taught high school Business, English and elementary Math for four years. Ruth left Royse City to marry Ben Cherry and taught thirteen years in various school districts as she followed her military husband. Mrs. Cherry returned to Royse City ISD in 1983, as our high school business teacher. Ruth was promoted to Browning Primary Principal in 1984, and then eighteen months later moved back to the high school where she served as principal until her retirement. Ruth led our high school to receive our districts first “Recognized” status rating from the Texas Education Agency. After retirement, Ruth worked for five years at Dallas ISD as a consultant to low performing secondary schools. Mama Cherry, as she was affectionately named by students, spent 19 years impacting the life of each child she taught at Royse City. Ruth loved her students, wanted them to succeed, and went the extra mile to help her students, especially those less fortunate. At the close of announcements each morning, Mrs. Cherry would smile and remind her students and staff, …”remember Mrs. Cherry loves you.” After a total of 28 years in education, Ruth Cherry retired in June of 1998. We wish to thank you, Ruth Cherry, for making a difference for Royse City students and always remember Royse City ISD loves you! “Our children are a gift from God and should be cherished each and every day.”

Front Row: Left to Right- Sophomore Princess - Danielle Benavidez, Junior Princess -Jayci Nelson, Freshmen Princess - Kyla Simmons 2nd. Row: Left to Right- Queen Candidates - Amanda Boudreaux, Rheannea Howerton, Jocelynn Denham, Camille Flores 3rd. Row: Left to Right- Freshman Prince - Gerard Whetstone, Sophomore Prince - Zach Posey, Junior Prince - Ryon Phillips 4th. Row: Left to Right- King Candidates - Preston Corbin, Myrick Mosque, Mason Hartung, and not pictured Trey Crutchfield


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The loan officer said, ‘Sir, we are very Red Neck Bank Loan happy to have had your business, and this transaction has worked out very nicely, but we are a Never underestimate A Texas Redneck cowboy. little puzzled. While you were away, we checked you out on Dunn & Bradstreet and found that A Redneck from Sweetwater, Texas you are a highly sophisticated investor and mulwalked into a Bank in New York City and asked timillionaire with real estate and financial interfor the loan officer. He told the loan officer that ests all over the world. Your investments include he was going to Paris on an international reda large number of wind turbines around Sweetneck festival for two weeks and needed to borwater, Texas. What puzzles us is, why would you row $5,000 and that he was not a depositor of the bother to borrow $5,000? bank. The bank officer told him that the bank would need some form of security for the loan, so the redneck handed over the keys to a new Ferrari. The car was parked on the street in front of the bank. The redneck produced the title and everything checked out. The loan officer agreed to hold the car as collateral for the loan and apologized for having to charge 12% interest. Later, the bank’s president and its officers all enjoyed a good laugh at the redneck from the south for using a $250,000 Ferrari as collateral for a $5,000 loan. An employee of the bank then drove the Ferrari into the bank’s private underground garage and parked it. Two weeks later, the redneck returned, repaid the $5,000 and the interest of $23.07.

The good ‘ole Texas boy replied, ‘Where else in New York City can I park my car for two weeks for only $23.07 and expect it to be there when I return? His name was BUBBA....

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“You cannot legislate the poor into prosperity by legislating the wealthy out of prosperity. What one person receives without working for, another person must work for without receiving. The government cannot give to anybody anything that the government does not first take from somebody else. When half of the people get the idea that they do not have to work because the other half is going to take care of them, and when the other half gets the idea that it does no good to work because somebody else is going to get what they work for, that is the beginning of the end of any nation. You cannot multiply wealth by dividing it.” Adrian Rogers 1931


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Buffalos of the Past This year the Lone Oak Varsity Cheerleaders planned a retro pep rally to “Honor the Buffaloes of the Past”. The 13 cheerleaders on the squad borrowed cheerleader uniforms from community members (many of whom currently teach in the district) and wore them to the pep rally. The oldest uniform was owned by Sulane Norton Fannin in 1958. It is a handmade, reversable, wool uniform and was borrowed by JV Captain Haley Hinson.

LOHS cheerleaders and LOISD alumni employees.

Senior Marilyn Anderson is wearing Susan Gentry’s 1984 LOHS Football Sweatheart Varsity Cheer Uniform. Lone Oak Middle School at Quitman 7th Grade won 24 – 8. Scoring for the Buffaloes were Nick Goodwin on a 30 yard touchdown run. Devin Shaw ran in the 2-pt conversion. Andrew Nichols completed a 30 yard TD pass to Jacob Lemieux. Goodwin ran in the 2-pt conversion. Nichols also completed a 26 yard TD pass to Lemieux. Nichols ran in the 2-pt conversion. Jonah Carson added an interception for the defense. Record 1-0. Next game will be Thursday in Lone Oak vs Winnsboro at 4:30. 8th Grade won 14-0 Scoring first for the Buffaloes was Ethan Fite completing a 5 yard TD pass Sawyer Zachary. The 2-pt conversion was no good. Next was a 25 yard Fite pass to Jon Moore. Moore also ran in the 2-pt conversion. Record 1-0. Next game will be Thursday in Lone Oak vs Winnsboro at 6:00.

At this year’s MTV Video Music Awards, Beyonce’ earned Best Video of the Year for her “Single Ladies” video. At a Lone Oak Pep Rally, Senior Football Players Trey Malone, Trenton Overly and Travis Harvey performed their version of the “Single Ladies” video.


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EVEN MORE DOCTOR’S ADVICE For those of you who watch what you eat, here’s the final word on nutrition and health. It’s a relief to know the truth after all those conflicting nutritional studies: 1. The Japanese eat very little fat And suffer fewer heart attacks than Americans. 2. The Mexicans eat a lot of fat And suffer fewer heart attacks than Americans. 3. The Chinese drink very little red wine And suffer fewer heart attacks than Americans. 4 The Italians drink a lot of red wine And suffer fewer heart attacks than Americans. 5. The Germans drink a lot of beers and eat lots of sausages and fats And suffer fewer heart attacks than Americans. CONCLUSION..... Eat and drink what you like. Speaking English is apparently what kills you.


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Texas Twister

WHAT DO THEODORE ROOSEVELT AND FISHING HAVE IN COMMON?

A. Fishing License. I guess I’ve been mad that people had to buy fishing license for as long as I can remember. It just didn’t make any sense to me. Driver’s license, sure! I get it. We have to make sure that people (as best we can) know how to drive. And, there are obvious expenses that go along with that process So, I never had a problem with paying my hard earned money for that. But, a fishing license? That was just wrong. Until now.

Apparently, Theodore Roosevelt had the forward thinking that when the population exploded from 1880, 50 million people, to 1910 92 million people, our natural resources were going to take a beating if there weren’t restrictions put in place. Daily and size limits were eventually put into place and the fees we pay are for those

restrictions to be enforced, restocking, and many other services. So, the next time you grumble about having to purchase a license to fish or paying the fee, remember that fishing licenses not only help preserve fish populations, but better your chances of successfully landing a fish as well. Fishing Licenses A valid fishing license with a freshwater or saltwater stamp endorsement is required to take fish, mussels, clams, crayfish or other aquatic life in the public waters of Texas. A hunting license is required to take turtles and frogs. The first Saturday in June of each year is the annual Free Fishing Day and no person is required to have a fishing license or stamp endorsements while fishing on that day. A fishing license and stamp endorsement are not required if fishing from the bank in a state park or in

waters completely enclosed by a state park. All other fishing regulations, such as length and bag limits, remain in effect. Recreational anglers must have a Texas fishing license and saltwater endorsement to bring any fish taken in federal waters ashore in Texas. (from www.tpwd.state.tx.us)


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Best Comeback If you ever testify in court, you might wish you could have been as sharp as this policeman. He was being cross-examined by a defense attorney during a felony trial. The lawyer was trying to undermine the policeman’s credibility... Q: ‘Officer -- did you see my client fleeing the scene?’ A: ‘No sir. But I subsequently observed a person matching the description of the offender, running several blocks away.’ Q: ‘Officer -- who provided this description?’ A: ‘The officer who responded to the scene.’ Q: ‘A fellow officer provided the description of this so-called offender. Do you trust your fellow officers?’ A: ‘Yes, sir. With my life.’ Q: ‘With your life? Let me ask you this then officer. Do you have a room where you change your clothes in preparation for your daily duties?’ A: ‘Yes sir, we do!’ Q: ‘And do you have a locker in the room?’ A: ‘Yes sir, I do.’ Q: ‘And do you have a lock on your locker?’ A: ‘Yes sir.’ Q: ‘Now why is it, officer, if you trust your fellow officers with your life, you find it necessary to lock your locker in a room you share with these same officers?’ A: ‘You see, sir -- we share the building with the court complex, and sometimes lawyers have been known to walk through that room.’ The courtroom EXPLODED with laughter, and a prompt recess was called. The officer on the stand has been nominated for this year’s ‘Best Comeback’ line -- and we think he’ll win.

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UPDATE!! CAMERA FOUND!! If there is anybody out there who doesn’t know the tragic story of a tiny angel called home a bit too early for us. Here is a recap. This story begins almost a year ago. There was an accident on the 515 Bridge over Lake Fork between Emory and Yantis on December 15, 2008. Alanna Jisha, 14 months old, did not survive the tragedy. The car was submerged in water, and a camera was in it. This camera was very important to Alanna’s parents because it contained the pictures and videos of the last six weeks of their daughter’s life. Since the accident there have been people handing out posters, volunteer search parties and a dive team devoting their time and effort to bring this camera back to her family. And, last week Texas Twister received this! LETTER TO TEXAS TWISTER FROM RAMY JISHA. The camera was found by a fisherman in the tournament last weekend (9-19-09). His name is Leslie Wood and he lives in Kemp, Tx. Because the water was rough, and he has a small boat, he was fishing along the shore. He likes to look for “stuff” wherever he goes and is always finding things. He thought the bag might be someone’s fanny pack when he saw it, but realized it was a camera when

Texas Twister contact points, so they have had to take the card apart. They say the inside looks good, and they give me a 75% chance of being able to get the data off. I might have an answer today, but it will probably be Monday. Thank you so much for everything you have done to help with this. We really appreciate all the effort, concern, thoughts, and prayers. When I get some pictures, I will share them.

he picked it up. It was right at the edge of the water on the concrete embankment at the west end of the bridge, (about a mile from the site of the accident). He had not heard about the accident or the loss of the camera. He took everything out of the bag and laid it out to dry. Later, he stopped to visit a friend, Tom Evans, who is a fishing guide on Lake Fork. They got into a conversation of, “Well, what have you found lately?” and when he told Tom about the camera, Tom realized that it could be mine. He did not know how to contact me, but a friend of his did, and she called my clinic Monday morning and gave me Tom’s name and number. I sent the SD card to a computer forensics company in Arlington, and they are working on extracting the data from the card. There was too much corrosion on the

NOTE FROM THE GANG AT TEXAS TWISTER! We also want to thank everyone involved in the search for this camera! It was all the people who pitched in with flyers and search parties and just talking to one another that led to its recovery. You have to think about the miracles that took place: The camera floating a mile away to land in plain site. The rough waters that day that kept Leslie Wood, a man who likes to ‘find’ things, fishing along the shore. Leslie knew nothing about the treasure he found that day. He just happened to stop by to talk to Tom Evans. And, on that day, what made Tom ask Leslie, “Well, what have you found lately?” I have to say God was handing out the miracles! Anybody needing a guide service? Give Tom a call at Tom Evans Lake Fork Guide Service. His phone number is 903-383-3059. Just a little thank you to Tom for caring enough to get the camera back to the owners!


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October, 2009

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October, 2009

Texas Twister

WEIRD FACTS! Here are some weird facts I bet most of you don’t know! I tried to check on the validity of some of them, but most are both confirmed - and denied on the internet. There is a lot of controversy in the trivia world whether Marilyn Monroe had 6 toes on one foot or not. Really, who cares? *It is impossible to lick your elbow. *A crocodile can’t stick its tongue out. *A shrimp’s heart is in its head. *In a study of 200,000 ostriches over a period of 80 years, no one reported a single case where an ostrich buried its head in the sand. *It is physically impossible for pigs to look up into the sky. *A pregnant goldfish is called a twit. *More than 50% of the people in the world have never made or received a telephone call. *Horses can’t vomit. *The “sixth sick sheik’s sixth sheep’s sick” is said to be the tough est tongue twister in the English language. *If you sneeze too hard, you can fracture a rib. (If you try to suppress a sneeze, you can rupture a blood vessel in your head or neck and die. If you keep your eyes open by force, they can pop out.) *Rats multiply so quickly that in 18 months, two rats could have over a million descendants. *If the government has no knowledge of aliens, then why does Title 14, Section 1211 of the Code of Federal Regulations, implemented on July 16, 1969, make it illegal for U.S. citi zens to have any contact with extraterrestrials or their ve hicles? *Walt Disney was afraid of mice. *Pearls melt in vinegar. *It is possible to lead a cow upstairs...but not downstairs. *A duck’s quack doesn’t echo, and no one knows why. *The reason firehouses have circular stairways is from the days when the engines were pulled by horses. The horses were stabled on the ground floor and figured out how to walk up straight stair cases. *Richard Millhouse Nixon was the first US president whose name contains all the letters from the word “criminal.” The sec ond was William Jefferson Clinton. As I said, Texas Twister is not stating these as facts, but we will bet there were a whole lot of you out there trying to lick your elbows!


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October, 2009

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October, 2009

Texas Twister

It’s almost fall weather again. It will be nice to have some cooler weather. The rains we have had are really good too. Only trouble is that the grass will really grow now. More mowing to do before that first fall frost. If you happen to have a pear tree or if a neighbor offers you pears (like Mine did!) take them and make you a pear pie. You make them just like you make a fresh apple pie. They are really good and an excellent way to use those pears! These pork chops will be really good on a cool day. Hope you tried “The Chicken Crescent Rolls”? They are not only as easy as they sound but a great treat as well. No Fuss Pork Chops 4 Boneless Pork Chops (3/4 inch thick) 2 T. Olive Oil 2 T Cider Vinegar 2 Medium Onions, Chopped ½ C. Pineapple juice ½ t. salt 2 T. Brown Sugar In a skillet, cook pork chops in oil until browned on both sides, about 8 minutes. Add onions and cook until the onions are tender. Combine pineapple juice, brown sugar, vinegar and salt; pour over pork chops. Cover and simmer until the pork chops are tender, about 15 more minutes. You can serve them over noodles. Makes 4 servings. Enjoy! This is another good slaw recipe that is colorful for a fall table and delicious. Apple Carrot Slaw 4 C. Shredded Cabbage 2 C. Shredded Carrot 1 ¾ C. Unpeeled Chopped Red Delicious Apples 2/3 C. Fat-Free Mayo 2 T. Sugar 1/3 C. White Vinegar 1 t. Celery Seeds Combine First 3 ingredients in a large bowl. Combine mayo and next 3 ingredients in a small mixing bowl or measuring cup. Pour over cabbage mixture tossing gently to coat. Cover and chill. Serve on Cabbage leaves if desired. This is wonderful with the No Fuss Pork Chops and warm, buttered French bread. Enjoy!! Since I started this article, we have had over 8 inches of rain. Many places have had a lot more. I said the rain was good, but now a little sunshine would be great.


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October, 2009

Smile:

Marriage changes passion. Suddenly you’re in bed with a relative. I saw a woman wearing a sweat shirt with ‘Guess’ on it. So I said ‘Implants?’ She hit me. How come we choose from just two people to run for president and over fifty for Miss America ? Now that food has replaced sex in my life, I can’t even get into my own pants. I signed up for an exercise class and was told to wear loose-fitting clothing. If I HAD any loose-fitting clothing, I wouldn’t have signed up in the first place! When I was young we used to go ‘skinny dipping,’ now I just ‘chunky dunk.’ Don’t argue with an idiot; people watching may not be able to tell the difference. Wouldn’t it be nice if whenever we messed up our life we could simply press ‘Ctrl Alt Delete’ and start all over? AMEN, AMEN !! Why is it that our children can’t read a Bible in school, but they can in prison? Wouldn’t you know it...Brain cells come and brain cells go, but FAT cells live forever. Why do I have to swear on the Bible in court when the Ten Commandments cannot be displayed outside?

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October, 2009

Q. Can you tell me how the Egyptians mummified their dead and is it still possible to have this done today? Jordan C. (Royse City, Texas) A. The Ancient Egyptians mummified as a direct result of their belief that the physical body survives death and will need personal possessions in the hereafter. In order to survive the next life, they believed that they needed to adhere to the strict rules of mummification at the end of this life. The Egyptians believed that there were six important aspects that made up a human being: (1) The physical body, (2) the shadow, (3) the name, (4) the spirit, (5) the personality and (6) the immortality of the person. Each one of these elements played an important role in the well being of an individual and each was necessary to achieve rebirth into the afterlife. Mummification is a preservation process, just as embalming is but they differ greatly. Some mummies are preserved wet, some are frozen and some are dried. This can be a natural process or it may be deliberately achieved. The Egyptian mummies were deliberately made by drying the body both inside and out. By eliminating moisture, you eliminate the source of decay. The body is dried by using a salt mixture called natron that pulls moisture from the tissues. The process itself is relatively simply though barbaric in its nature and (in my opinion) boarders on abuse to the deceased. The process began with washing the body with a solution of natron and water. In order to dry the body completely, the internal organs must be removed. The first organ removed was the brain. The brain was extracted by poking a hole in the thin bone at the top of the nostril called the ethmoid bone. A large bronze needle with a hooked end was used to perform this procedure. The brain is pulled from the nose in pieces and then palm wine and frankincense was used to flush and clean the cranial cavity. The next step was to remove the internal organs. A sharp black stone (made of black volcanic glass called obsidian) was used to cut a small incision on the left side of the abdomen. The heart, believed to hold the essence of the person was the only organ left intact. All other organs were removed and washed in frankincense, myrrh and palm wine and then dried using natron. After being individually preserved, the organs (liver, stomach, intestines and lungs) were place in special canisters called canopic jars; to be place later with the mummy at the time of entombment. After all organs with the exception of the heart were removed, the abdominal and thoracic cavities were rinsed with palm wine and myrrh. The hollow body was then stuffed with small bags of the natron solution to dry the corpse from the inside out. While this act technically was the end of the ‘embalming’ or ‘surgical’ procedure; the complete process was far from over. In the next issue of Ask the Director, we will continue the procedure of the full mummification and let you know if this is still practiced today. Read next month- you may be surprised by the answer. (If you have a question that you would like answered in this column, please write to ASK THE DIRECTOR c/o Ingram Funeral Home P.O. Box 2218 Quinlan, Texas 75474).

Texas Twister


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October, 2009

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HAVE A HEALTHY HALLOWEEN!

Ginger Lane

Oops! I’m pretty sure you can’t even say those two words in the same sentence. Or, maybe you can. I can’t imagine Halloween with all that candy, but there are ‘treats’ that won’t spin your child into the worst sugar rush of the year. So, if you’re one of those moms, dads, or grandparents who recognize that the kids will be getting plenty of sweets without you contributing to their loot, you may want to hand out some Halloween treats that lean toward the healthy side without compromising the spirit of the holiday for the kids. Try some of the following: Roasted pumpkin or sunflower seeds Granola bars Raisins tie them in individual packets to save some Popcorn - pop and wrap in paper or netting and tie with a string If you don’t want to provide food, try giving the children some of these fun items: Halloween pens/pencils tied together with a black and/or orange ribbon Halloween stickers Coins wrapped in orange netting tied with black ribbon Hair clips or ribbons for little girls Trading cards for the boys; Spiderman Cards, Batman cards; baseball cards Stickers – All children love stickers! Coloring books or crayons Mini Books And, make sure you examine all treats. Better Safe Than Sorry!

Have a SAFE Halloween! Solution on Page 35


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October, 2009

1-877-FOOD-MINISTRY (1-877-366-3646) OCTOBER 2009 MENU SIGNATURE BOX $30.00 Balanced nutrition and variety with enough food to feed a family of four for a week. 1.5 lb. New York Strips Steaks (3 x 8 oz.) 1 lb. Steak Fajita Strips 2 lb. Chicken Stir Fry Skillet Meal 1 lb. Lean Ground Beef 1.5 lb. Breaded White Meat Chicken Tenders 1 lb. avg. Center Cut Ham Steaks (Hickory Smoked) 1 lb. Bake or Fry Fish Sticks (32 sticks) 1 lb. Pasta 25 oz. Marinara Sauce 1 lb. Frozen Baby Lima Beans 1 lb. Frozen Mixed Vegetables 2 lb. bag Fresh Apples (8-10 ct.) 10 ct. Flour Tortilla Wraps 32 oz. 2% Shelf Stable Milk Dozen Eggs Dessert SENIOR & CONVENIENCE MEALS $28.00 For Seniors or People on the Go! Ten perfectly seasoned, nutritionally balanced, fully cooked meals—just heat and serve. Each meal has been developed with the dietary needs of senior citizens in mind, and contains 3 oz. of protein, a starch & two vegetables or fruit. Roasted Chicken with red skin potatoes, sugar snap peas & carrots Meat Lasagna with green beans and cauliflower Salisbury Steak and Gravy with red skin potatoes, cauliflower and peas/carrots Meatloaf and Gravy with mashed potatoes, peas, carrots, cauliflower Chicken Chow Mein with sugar snap peas, cauliflower Cheese Manicotti with green beans, peas, carrots Chili with Beef and Beans with corn/red peppers, peas Boneless Pork Patty with roasted sweet potatoes, sugar snap peas, broccoli/cauliflower blend Fettuccini Alfredo with Brussels sprouts, zucchini

Lemon Pepper Baked Fish with rice, peas and zucchini/ red pepper blend Desserts: Assorted Cookies, Sugar-Free Applesauce, Vanilla Pudding Cup, Apple Juice, Orange Juice and Diced Pineapple 5 LB. ALLERGEN-FREE FOOD BOX $25.00 Processed to eliminate the eight top serious allergens: Peanuts, Soybeans, Milk, Eggs, Fish, Crustacea, Tree Nuts and Gluten (wheat, rye and barley). Great for children and adults! 1 lb. Breaded Chicken Breast Fillets (4 x 4 oz.) 1 lb. Breaded Chicken Breast Nuggets 1 lb. Breaded Cubed Steak (4 x 4 oz.) 1 lb. Breaded Wings 1 lb. Breaded Chicken Tenders Battered/Breaded with water, white rice, brown rice, modified tapioca starch, flax seed, sugar, salt, spices, dehydrated garlic, spice extractives/Breaded and oleoresin paprika. Breading is pre-browned in Canola oil. Thanksgiving Holiday Box $36.00 Available for Pre-order September 1st-October 28th!!!! This year we have an exciting menu that we think your friends and family will enjoy and will make a nice gift for anyone that you believe needs a little uplifting around the holidays. This will not affect the normal November order period. This is a special order in addition to your regular order and no Holiday Box orders will be accepted after the October 28th deadline. This Holiday Box will ONLY be shipped during the November distribution period and not beforehand. SNAP benefits cannot be accepted with this order until 35 days prior to the delivery date and cannot be accepted online. 7 lb. (avg.) Perdue Roaster 2 lb. Frozen Green Beans 4.5 oz. Brown Gravy Mix 2.5 lb. Boneless Netted Ham 1 lb. Frozen Cranberries 1 Dessert Item (Pie or Cake)

Texas Twister 2 lb. Frozen Diced Sweet Potatoes 17 oz. Ready to Cook Corn Bread Dressing 1 Recipe Sheet with scripture 3.5 lb. (avg.) Frozen Corn Cobbett’s (12) 8 ct. Heat and Serve Large Dinner Roll ***Specials may now be purchased with or without the purchase of any of the Standard Boxes listed above**** OCTOBER SPECIAL #1 $23.00 7 lb. Assorted Meat Grill Box 1.5 lb. Ribeye Steaks (3 x 8 oz.) 2 lb. Pork Chops (4 x 8 oz.) 2 lb. Lean Hamburger Steaks (4 x 8 oz.) 1.5 lb. Bratwurst Sausage with Cheese OCTOBER SPECIAL #2 $22.00 4.5 lb. Assorted Steak Combo 1.5 lb. Bone In Ribeye Steaks (2 x 12 oz.) 1.5 lb. Kansas City Strip Steaks (2 x 12 oz.) 1.5 lb. T-Bone Steaks (2 x 12 oz.) OCTOBER SPECIAL #3 $20.00 10 lb. Breaded Chicken Combo Box 4 lb. Breaded Chicken Pieces 2 lb. Breaded Chicken Tenders 2 lb. Breaded Chicken Breast Fillet 2 lb. Breaded White Meat Chicken Nuggets OCTOBER SPECIAL #4 $22.00 Fresh Fruit and Veggie Box 1 Premium Sweet Golden Ripe Pineapple 3 lb. bag New Crop Florida Tangerines 1 Premium Vine Ripened Cantaloupe 4 Premium Washington State Bosc Pears 4 Premium Juicy Limes 3 lb. bag Premium New Crop Large Red Potatoes 2 lb. bag Premium New Crop Yellow Onions 1 head Premium Green Cabbage 2 bulbs Premium Jumbo Garlic 2 ct. Premium Large Green Bell Pepper 3 lb. bag Premium Bagged Idaho Potatoes 1 lb. bag Premium California whole Peeled Baby Carrots Orders Due: Contact Your Local Host Site* Distribution Day: Contact Your Local Host Site* *Please note that some host sites have earlier order deadlines. Please contact your local host site for information. Visit our website to locate a host site near you www.angelfoodministries.com Angel Food Ministries Reserves the Right to Substitute Any of the Above Items Due to Availability, Cost and Quality. We Accept Food Stamps (EBT). Angel Food Ministries is an equal opportunity provider and employer. Complaints of discrimination should be sent to USDA, Director, Office of Civil Rights, Washington, DC 20250-9410


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BEAUTY, ETC. AVON WANTED Avon Representatives for my new unit. $10 Sign Up. Great Extra Income or just buy products at deep discount for yourself. Call Cindy Johnson @ 903-268-6271 or email ceejaysAVON@ aol.com

CLEANING SERVICE

Immaculate Cleaners

October, 2009

REAL ESTATE

903-358-4700 710 E. Quinlan Pkwy, Quinlan Tx 75474

WWW.TAWAKONILAKEREALESTATE.COM

972-974-5363 ROOFING HEY! If you are looking for a great Deal direct with the Roofer. 30 yrs exhousekeeper, Angie at Immaculate Cleaning is who perience call for Free Lowest estimate! Rickey Casey 903-356-5001 you want. cell 903-850-0463 I got a chance to meet her and got first hand knowledge of Mike Watts Roofing her great work and organizational Insurance Claims Welcomed skills! All Work Gauranteed! Call her today ......... 903-455-0422 Ginger Lane, Publisher Texas Twister

INSURANCE Paying too much for Medicare supplements? It doesn’t cost anything to compare? Bill Slaughter Insurance 903-356-4830 or 800-935-6193 Don’t let your guaranteed issue date expire.

MUSIC LESSONS

Guitars, Amps, Drums, P.A.’s & Accessories

All your musical needs www.hogmusic.net 9701 Wesley St. Suite 200 Greenville Tx 75402 903-454-1993

SEWING Repairs * Alterations * Custom Work Hems * Quilts * ReStyles Affordable Prices * Fast Turnaround 8709 Wesley Suite C Greenville, Tx 682-554-4550 38 Years Experience THE STUDIO “Let Us Sew It For You!”

WELDING & FENCING

Welding & Fencing , Pipe & Wire Have Welder Will Travel Ronnie West 903-765-2697

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October, 2009

Sensible Observations

1) When I die, I want to die like my grandfather--who died peacefully in his sleep. Not screaming like all the passengers in his car.” --Author Unknown ======================================================= 2) Advice for the day: If you have a lot of tension and you get a headache, do what it says on the aspirin bottle: “Take two aspirin” and “Keep away from children.” --Author Unknown =========================================================== 3) “Oh, you hate your job? Why didn’t you say so? There’s a support group for that. It’s called EVERYBODY, and they meet at the bar.” --Drew Carey ======================================================== 4) “The problem with the designated driver program, it’s not a desirable job, but if you ever get sucked into doing it, have fun with it. At the end of the night, drop them off at the wrong house.” --Jeff Foxworthy =========================================================== 5) “If a woman has to choose between catching a fly ball and saving an infant’s life, she will choose to save the infant’s life without even considering if there is a man on base.” --Dave Barry =========================================================== 6) “Relationships are hard. It’s like a full time job, and we should treat it like one. If your boyfriend or girlfriend wants to leave you, they should give you two weeks’ notice. There should be severance pay, the day before they leave you, they should have to find you a temp.” --Bob Ettinger =========================================================== 7) “My Mom said she learned how to swim when someone took her out in the lake and threw her off the boat. I said, ‘Mom, they weren’t trying to teach you how to swim.’” --Paula Poundstone

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Faith is a Lifestyle

By Pastors Dean & Ruth Remmers FaithisaLifestyle@yahoo.com

Raymond C— had made the decision. He was going to end it all. His marriage was in shambles. His job was a joke—he sold life insurance and talked about death all day. He didn’t even know what real life was all about. He had no purpose, no reason for living. He had decided to take his life. With the decision firmly planted in his heart, Raymond decided to put his affairs in order. He wanted to make sure his children would be provided for when he was gone, so he delayed his final actions for a few days… …At that very time, a group of young Bible college students were in the “wrong” place at the right time. A large group of them had come to our church for a weekend of ministry. On Saturday morning, they had divided into groups and began to cover an area near the church. However, this small group ended up on the “wrong” street in a neighborhood past the specified area. Those few students found themselves in front of Raymond C’s house. Raymond and his wife listened intently to the young people’s testimonies and cried as they realized that God loved them so much that He sent His only Son to die for them. They felt God’s overwhelming love flood their spirits, and together they knelt before the Creator. “Dear Jesus, forgive me of my sins. God, I believe in my heart that You raised Jesus from the dead. Jesus, I receive You now as my LORD and as my Savior. Thank You for coming into my heart—I AM SAVED!” When they had knelt down, they were steeped in sin, their lives in shambles. Then Jesus came into their hearts and forgave them from every sin they had ever committed. They arose “new creatures in Christ Jesus” (2 Corinthians 5:17). Their faces were washed by their tears, and their hearts cleansed by the Blood of the Lamb. New life had sprung up from within them, and they were filled with joy. Their world was forever changed, and they set out to change others. Some months later, Raymond came to church weeping and very broken. That week the LORD had led him to visit in a home on the Poteet Highway. There he explained the Gospel message to a man and his wife and urged them both to surrender their hearts to God. The man clearly wasn’t interested, but his wife was ready to

October, 2009 accept Jesus as her LORD and Savior. Just as she was about to pray the Sinner’s Prayer, her husband stopped her—He told her he didn’t want her to have anything to do with what Raymond was preaching. As Raymond was leaving, the lady asked him to come back and talk with her again…but he never had another opportunity. Neither Raymond nor the man nor his wife knew that in a few fleeting hours the woman would be killed in a car accident near their home. Her life here had ended abruptly, and she would forever be in eternity. It would be too late for her to get saved then, too late for her husband to beg her to call on God, too late to listen to God’s warning that came through a young Christian. Even though Raymond had gone back and led the man to the LORD, he was heartbroken because he did not know if the lady had made peace with God. He had given her the opportunity, the LORD had dealt with her heart, but she had listened to her husband instead of the heavenly Father. Raymond had to leave it all in God’s big, capable hands. After all, God is merciful. He’s not trying to keep people out of heaven; He’s trying to get them in! The lady had just had the Gospel message preached to her and even in the last seconds of her life, she could have called out the Name, Jesus!, and she would have stepped from this life into the everlasting arms of our Savior (Romans 10:13). Saved from sin and damnation—Saved to heaven and everlasting joy and peace. Now, Raymond’s testimony is in your hands. What will you do with Jesus? Will you accept Him as your LORD and Savior or will you put it off? The choice is yours—for now. “Choose you this day whom you will serve” (from Joshua 24:15).

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October, 2009

Texas Twister

A blonde meets up with a friend as she’s picking up her car from the mechanic. “Everything ok with your car now? “”Yes, thank goodness,” the blonde replies. “Weren’t you worried the mechanic might try to rip you off? “”Yeah, but he didn’t. I was SO RELIEVED when he told me all I needed was blinker fluid!”


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October, 2009

A doctor is talking to a car mechanic, “Your fee is several times more per hour then we get paid for medical care. “”Yeah, but you see, doc, you have always the same model, it hasn’t changed since Adam; but we have to keep up to date with new models coming every month. “ AND NOW A DIFFERENT PERSPECTIVE! Morris the loudmouth mechanic was removing the cylinder heads from the motor of a car when he spotted the famous heart surgeon Dr. Michael DeBakey, who was standing off to the side, waiting for the service manager to come take a look at his Mercedes. Morris shouts across the garage, “Hey DeBakey! Is that you? “Come on over here a minute!” The famous surgeon, a bit surprised, walked over to where Morris the mechanic was working on the car. Morris straightened up, wiped his hands on a rag and asked argumentatively, “So Mr. Fancy Doctor, look at this here work. I also open hearts, take valves out, grind ‘em, put in new parts, and when I finish this baby will purr like a kitten. So how come you get the big bucks, when you and me is doing basically the same work? “Dr. DeBakey leaned over and whispered to Morris the loudmouth mechanic. . . “Now try doing it with the engine running!” Puzzle on Page 29

Puzzle on Page 14

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Texas Twister October 2009  

Texas Twister October 2009

Texas Twister October 2009  

Texas Twister October 2009

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