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THERE ARE HEROES AMONG US! By Ginger Lane Pat Smith from Pittsburg, Tx., who also contributes Aunt Pat’s Diabetic Recipes to Texas Twister each month, is an amazing woman of many talents. Today, I’m going to tell you about her crocheting. She does such nice work and by nice, I mean that is so many different ways! Pat works tirelessly crocheting stuffed animals and clothes for dolls. She gives them to non-profit organizations for children who might be victims of abuse, fire/police departments to be distributed to families that have lost everything so that a child just might have one thing to keep of their very own immediately after a tragedy. Though Pat is retired, she continuously keeps her eyes out for previously loved dolls to ‘rehabilitate’ with new hairdos, shoes and accessories so the gift a child receives has a bright new look. She literally spends hours of her time and also her money to give a child a reason to smile on what could be a pretty bleak day for them. Our hats are off to Pat and we thank her for the contribution!
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May, 2015
A car mechanic received a repair order that read: “Check for clunking sound when going around corners.” So he took it out on a test drive and, sure enough, whenever he went round a corner, he heard a clunk. However he quickly located the problem and returned the repair order to the service manager with the notation: “Removed bowling ball from trunk.” ***** Walking up to a department store’s fabric counter, the pretty girl said, “I would like to buy this material for a new dress. How much does it cost?” “Only one kiss per yard,” replied the male clerk with a smirk. “That’s fine,” said the girl. “I’ll take ten yards.” With expectation and anticipation written all over his face, the clerk quickly measured out the cloth, wrapped it up, then teasingly held it out. The girl snapped up the package, pointed to the old geezer standing beside her, and smiled, “Grandpa will pay the bill.”
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A resident in a posh hotel breakfast room called over the head waiter one morning and read from the menu. “I’d like one under-cooked egg so that it’s runny, and one overcooked egg so that it’s tough and hard to eat. I’d also like grilled bacon which is a bit on the cold side, burnt toast, butter straight from the freezer so that it’s impossible to spread, and a pot of very weak, lukewarm coffee.” “That’s a complicated order sir,” said the bewildered waiter. “It might be quite difficult.” The guest replied sarcastically, “It can’t be that difficult because that’s exactly what you brought me yesterday!” ***** “What time does the library open?” the man on the phone asked. “Nine A.M.” came the reply. “And what’s the idea of calling me at home in the middle of the night to ask a question like that?” “Not until nine A.M.?” the man asked in a disappointed voice. “No, not till nine A.M.!” the librarian said. “Why do you want to get in before nine A.M.?” “Who said I wanted to get in?” the man sighed sadly. “I want to get out.”
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May, 2015
Texas Twister
A Loan for Kermit
A frog goes into a bank and approaches the teller. He can see from her nameplate that her name is Patricia Whack. “Miss Whack, I’d like to get a $30,000 loan to take a holiday.” Patty looks at the frog in disbelief and asks his name. The frog says his name is Kermit Jagger, his dad is Mick Jagger, and that it’s okay, he knows the bank manager. Patty explains that he will need to secure the loan with some collateral. The frog says, “Sure. I have this,” and produces a tiny porcelain elephant, about an inch tall, bright pink and perfectly formed. Very confused, Patty explains that she’ll have to consult with the bank manager and disappears into a back office. She finds the manager and says, “There’s a frog called Kermit Jagger out there who claims to know you and wants to borrow $30,000, and he wants to use this as collateral.” She holds up the tiny pink elephant. “I mean, what in the world is this?” (You’re going to love this)
(A masterpiece)
(Wait for it)
The bank manager looks back at her and says...”It’s a knickknack, Patty Whack. Give the frog a loan. His old man’s a Rolling Stone.”
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English Language… Sort of!
By Ginger Lane This story is from a dewdropper that was wearing cheaters so we’re not sure he knows his onions…. “A bell bottom had a beef with a doll. The two of them had some gigglewater and the bellbottom tried to give the doll some cash. The doll explained that the bank was closed. It’s a good thing the bellbottom listened as the doll might have put him in a big sleep. Then, he decided it would be better to offer her a handcuff to which she thought was the bee’s knees!” You’ll know what all that means if you were living in the 1920’s! Just as any new generation that comes along, there are new phrases that catch on; the roaring twenties were no different. Here’s some words and their meanings for a flash from the past! Need To Iron My Shoelaces - To excuse oneself to restroom Gigglewater - Liquor or Beer Gams - Legs Cat’s Meow - Awesome Dewdropper - A young unemployed man who sleeps all day Applesauce - An expletive Clams - Money Big Sleep - Death Know One’s Onions - To be well informed on a subject matter Ducky - Alright And How - Stongly agree Bank’s Closed - No kissing Bee’s Knees - The ultimate Beef - A complaint Bell Bottom - Sailor Bump Off - To kill Cash - A kiss Cheaters - Eyeglasses Doll - An attractive lady Don’t Take Any Wooden Nickels - Don’t do anything stupid Fire Extinguisher - A chaperone Fly Boy - Glamorous name for an aviator Glad Rags - “Going out of town” clothes Kisser - Mouth Handcuff - Engagement ring Spiflicated - Drunk
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Texas Twister
IRRATIONAL IRRITATIONS!! By Ginger Lane
You know until a few years ago, paper towels
were all the same size. They need to come with a warning label because for over a year now every time I pick up a package they are the ones that are perforated in one-half. Each time I tore one off, I promised myself to be careful to buy the ones with the full sheets.
Tearing off one-half a sheet was always barely
enough to do the job at hand. I was just as irritated at myself every time I reached for one as I was that they even made such a tiny size! Why didn’t they just do something obvious so you know what you are buying? Why can’t I remember to get the size I wanted?
Well, low and behold, the last ones I bought are
the full sheets. And, now every time I have a tiny mess, I’m thinking how irritating it is to have to use the full sheet! Humans.. go figure!
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Little Johnny came downstairs crying loudly. His mother asked, “What’s the matter now?” “Dad was hanging pictures, and just hit his thumb with a hammer,” said Johnny through his tears. “That’s not so serious,” soothed his mother. “I know you’re upset, but a big boy like you shouldn’t cry at something like that. Why didn’t you just laugh?” “I did!” sobbed Johnny. ***** Two confirmed bachelors sat talking, their conversation drifted from politics to cooking. “I got a cookbook once,” said one, “but I could never do anything with it.” “Too much fancy work in it, eh?” asked the other. “You said it. Every one of the recipes began the same way - ‘Take a clean dish.” ***** The Magician and the Parrot
A magician was working on a cruise ship in the
Caribbean. The audience would be different each week, so the magician allowed himself to do the same tricks over and over again.
There was only one problem: The captain’s par-
rot saw the shows every week and began to understand what the magician did in every trick. Once he understood that, he started shouting in the middle of the show.
“Look, it’s not the same hat!” “Look, he’s hiding
the flowers under the table!” “Hey, why are all the cards the Ace of Spades?”
The magician was furious but couldn’t do any-
thing, it was the captain’s parrot after all.
One day the ship had an accident and sank. The
magician found himself on a piece of wood, in the middle of the ocean, and of course the parrot was by his side.
They stared at each other with hate, but did not
utter a word. This went on for several days.
After a week the parrot finally said, “Okay, I
give up. What’d you do with the boat?”
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Texas Twister Awful Day Fishing
Jim had an awful day fishing on the lake, sitting in the blazing sun all day
without catching a single one. On his way home, he stopped at the supermarket and ordered four catfish. He told the fish salesman, “Pick four large ones out and throw them at me, will you?” “Why do you want me to throw them at you?” “Because I want to tell my wife that I caught them.” “Okay, but I suggest that you take the orange trout.” “Why’s that?” “Because your wife came in earlier today and said that if you came by, I should tell you to take orange trout. That’s what she’d like for supper tonight.” ***** Believe Your Husband “Do you really believe your husband when he tells you he goes fishing every weekend?” asked Jane’s best friend. “Why shouldn’t I?” said Jane. “Well, maybe he is having an affair?” “No way” said Jane “he never returns with any fish...” ***** Two young blonde women were playing golf at a foggy par three, and could see the flag, but not the green. Each hit their ball anyway. When they walked to the green, they discovered one ball about three feet from the cup, while the other ball somehow had gone directly in. The blondes tried to figure out which ball belonged to who, since they were both using Titleist number threes. Unable to decide, they returned to the Club House and asked the golf pro for a ruling. After hearing their story and congratulating them both on their superb shots under such adverse conditions the pro asked, “Okay, so who was playing the yellow ball?”
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May, 2015 GREAT TRUTHS 1. In my many years I have come to a conclusion that one useless man is a shame, two is a law firm, and three or more is a congress. -- John Adams 2. If you don’t read the newspaper you are uninformed, if you do read the newspaper you are misinformed. -- Mark Twain 3. Suppose you were an idiot. And suppose you were a member of Congress. But then I repeat myself. -- Mark Twain 4. I contend that for a nation to try to tax itself into prosperity is like a man standing in a bucket and trying to lift himself up by the handle. --Winston Churchill 5. A government which robs Peter to pay Paul can always depend on the support of Paul. -- George Bernard Shaw 6. A liberal is someone who feels a great debt to his fellow man, which debt he proposes to pay off with your money. -- G. Gordon Liddy 7. Democracy must be something more than two wolves and a sheep voting on what to have for dinner. --James Bovard, Civil Libertarian (1994) 8. Foreign aid might be defined as a transfer of money from poor people in rich countries to rich people in poor countries. -- Douglas Case, Classmate of Bill Clinton at Georgetown University. 9. Giving money and power to government is like giving whiskey and car keys to teenage boys. -- P.J. O’Rourke, Civil Libertarian 10. Government is the great fiction, through which everybody endeavors to live at the expense of everybody else. -- Frederic Bastiat French economist(1801-1850) 11. Government’s view of the economy could be summed up in a few short phrases: If it moves, tax it. If it keeps moving, regulate it. And if it stops moving, subsidize it. --Ronald Reagan (1986)
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May, 2015 When her car broke down, a woman called out a local mechanic to repair it. He lifted up the hood, looked in the engine, whacked something with a hammer and said: “Try it now.” To her amazement, the car started straight away. “That’s incredible,” she said. “You’ve been here less than a minute and you’ve managed to fix it. I’m so grateful.” “All part of the job, madam. That’ll be $250.” The smile vanished from the woman’s face. “How much? How can you charge $250 when all you did was hit it with a hammer?” “I can write you out an itemized bill if you like.” “Yes, please,” she said firmly. So he wrote out the bill and handed it to her. It read: “Hitting engine with hammer – $10. Knowing where to hit it – $240.” ***** After a particularly poor game of golf, a popular club member skipped the clubhouse and started to go home. As he was walking to the parking lot to get his car, a policeman stopped him and asked, “Did you tee off on the sixteenth hole about twenty minutes ago?” “Yes,” the golfer responded. “Did you happen to hook your ball so that it went over the trees and off the course?” the cop asked. “Yes, I did. How did you know?” the golfer asked. “Well,” said the policeman very seriously, “Your ball flew out onto the highway and crashed through a driver’s windshield. The car went out of control, crashing into five other cars and a fire truck. The fire truck couldn’t make it to the fire, and the building burned down. So, what are you going to do about it?” The golfer thought it over carefully and responded, “I think I’ll close my stance a little bit, tighten my grip and lower my right thumb.” ***** Bubba and Junior were standing at the base of a flagpole, looking up. A woman walked by and asked what they were doing. “We’re supposed to find the height of the flagpole,” said Bubba, “but we don’t have a ladder.” The woman took a wrench from her purse, loosened a few bolts, and laid the pole down. Then she took a tape measure from her pocket, took a measurement and announced, “Eighteen feet, six inches,” and walked away. Junior shook his head and laughed. “Ain’t that just like a dumb blonde! We ask for the height, and she gives us the length!”
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Fourteen students from Caddo Mills Middle School TMSCA traveled to San Antonio to compete in the state-wide competition this weekend. They competed in Number Sense, Mathematics, Calculator Skills, and Science. In the overall sweepstakes, Caddo Mills took home 5th place out of all Division 3A schools. The math team placed 6th overall and the science team placed 4th overall.
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Some community and business leaders were recently honored for their outstanding support and generosity to the students and schools of Caddo Mills. They are from left to right Payne’s Supermarket, Twelve Overflowing Baskets Food Pantry, and Southwest Automall.
The top 20 students received awards in each event. Several of our students placed in the top 10. Individual awards are as follows:
Number Sense
8th grade Matthew Marlborough - 10th Antonio Sanchez - 17th 7th grade Hunter Parrish - 18th 6th grade Julie Johnson - 20th
Mathematics
8th grade Matthew Marlborough - 4th Antonio Sanchez - 19th 7th grade Hunter Parrish - 8th 6th grade Julie Johnson - 15th
Calculator Skills
8th grade Matthew Marlborough - 9th Gaby Lopez - 16th Miranda Zapata - 16th
Science
8th grade Matthew Marlborough - 6th Antonio Sanchez - 7th Debbie Williams - 8th 7th grade Hunter Parrish - 6t;h Brett Harrington - 7th Chloe Lawless - 8th 6th Grade Kylie McHargue - 3rd Lillie Cardwell - 18th
Congratulations to all of our students! They worked really hard! We are so proud of them!
Caddo Mills ISD Baccalaureate
May 31, 2015 Paradise Baptist Church 2:00 p.m.
Graduation
June 6, 2015 Texas A&M – Commerce 10:00 a.m.
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Answer on Page 25
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DID YOU EVER WONDER?
The character got his name from two brothers
who were childhood classmates of Freleng and nicknamed “Porky” and “Piggy”. Porky got his stutter from a voice actor named Joe Dougherty. Joe had a stammering problem in real life and because he couldn’t at times control his stutter, a new voice recorder was hired. The versatile Mel Blanc replaced Dougherty in 1937, to become the new voice of Porky Pig. Though still in supporting roles, he got most of the laughs. The large fan following made the directors realize that they had a star in disguise. “Porky’s Duck Hunt” was Porky Pig’s first major break as a lead role that was released by the Warner Bros. Pictures in 1937. The movie was also the first for Mel Blanc, who voiced for Porky and hence, became the permanent voice for Porky, until his death in 1937. Porky was then voiced by another talented voice artist, Bob Bergen. Porky starred in a series of movies after his first hit in the late 30s. However, the directors had no hold on the age, appearance and personality of the character. Porky appeared in different age groups, with different personalities and roles in different movies. Bob Clampett, reformed and fixed the character of Porky for his future screen appearances. Hence, Porky became a permanent young adult with a cuter, slimmer and more appealing personality and with less stutter. Despite the ups and downs, Porky Pig has truly been one of the most lovable and adorable cartoon characters of all times THHHHHHAATTT’SSSSS ALL FOLKS! lifestyle.iloveindia.com
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Quinlan ISD...There’s an App for That! Easier, Faster, Quicker Communications Right on your Smart Phone...Download our New App Today!
FIRST RESPONDERS HONORED On Thursday, April 9, 2015, the FHS FFA organized a special dinner and recognition banquet for area first responders. The dinner was catered by Soulman’s BBQ of Quinlan. Judge David McNabb served as the guest speaker for the event. He spoke about the statistics in each of the first resonders fields, employment, daily duties, saving lives and more. His speaking congratulated first responders on their strong efforts to protect and serve. The Quinlan ISD FFA honored each volunteer fire department and police department in attendance with dinner and a plaque.
The FHS Wind Ensemble and Symphonic Band traveled to Corpus Christi, TX from April 9-12. They competed in the South Coast Music Festivals held at Flour Bluff High School. According to Director of Bands Marty Filip, “I am very pleased and proud to announce that both bands did an outstanding job representing Quinlan ISD at the contest. The Wind Ensemble brought home a “Superior Rating” and trophy for their performance. Additionally, the Symphonic Band brought home an “Excellent Rating” and trophy for their performance. The students worked hard to prepare the program for contest and earned every bit of this recognition. Congratulations to the FHS Panther Bands on the the well deserved awards.”
QISDPD Explorers Place at Dallas PD Competition:
On Saturday, April 4th, QISD PD Explorer Post #356 competed in the Dallas Police Department’s Battle at Big D Explorer Competition. QISD Police Officer Steve Allen reported, “Our team placed third in the Robbery in progress scenario - scoring their first trophy ever for the Post! The Explorers competed against 24 other law enforcement explorer posts from across the State. We are very proud of these Explorers for their hard work and hours of training and practice that went into this win.”
Congratulations QISD Police Explorers!
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Texas Twister
ROOFING
Deal direct with the Roofer. 30 yrs experience call for Free Lowest estimate! Rickey Casey 903-356-5001 cell 903-850-0463 INSURANCE Motorcycle Insurance Looking for Low Rates? We’ve Got Them! 903-356-6500 adam@trustsia.com www.trustsia.com 108 W Main St ( Down Town ) Quinlan
SELLING YOUR PROPERTY? Check out our newest magazine: East Texas Properties or go online at: www.easttexaspropertiesmagazine.com
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MODERN DEFINITIONS BLAMESTORMING Sitting around in a group, discussing why a deadline was missed or a project failed, and who was responsible. CUBE FARM An office filled with cubicles. IDEA HAMSTERS People who always seem to have their idea generators running. MOUSE POTATO The on-line, wired generation’s answer to the couch potato. PRAIRIE DOGGING When someone yells or drops something loudly in a cube farm, and people’s heads pop up over the walls to see what’s going on. SITCOMs
May, 2015
(Single Income, Two Children, Oppressive Mortgage) What yuppies turn into when they have children and one of them stops working to stay home with the kids. SQUIRT THE BIRD To transmit a signal to a satellite. STRESS PUPPY A person who seems to thrive on being stressed out and whiny. SWIPED OUT An ATM or credit card that has been rendered useless because the magnetic strip is worn away from extensive use. TOURISTS People who take training classes just to get a vacation from their jobs. “We had three serious students in the class; the rest were just tourists. XEROX SUBSIDY Euphemism for swiping free photocopies from one’s workplace. ALPHA GEEK The most knowledgeable, technically proficient person in an office or work group. GOOD JOB A “Get-Out-Of-Debt” Job. A well-paying job people take in order to pay off their debts, one that they will quit as soon as they are solvent again. IRRITAINMENT Entertainment and media spectacles that are annoying but you find your-self unable to stop watching them. The
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O.J. trials were a prime example. Bill Clinton’s shameful video Grand Jury testimony is another. PERCUSSIVE MAINTENANCE The fine art of whacking the heck out of an electronic device to get it to work again. VULCAN NERVE PINCH The taxing hand position required to reach all the appropriate keys for certain commands. For instance, the arm re-boot for a Mac II computer involves simultaneously pressing the Control key, the Command Key and the Power On key. DILBERTED To be exploited and oppressed by your boss. Derived from the experiences of Dilbert, the geek-in-hell comic strip character. “I’ve been dilberted again. The old man revised the specs for the fourth time this week.” OHNOSECOND That minuscule fraction of time in which you realize that you’ve just made a BIG mistake.
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May, 2015 for us. So, if you see one, past or present, tell them how much you appreciate them and their service to this country. *****
Texas Twister *****
Any Day Fruit Smoothie (Gluten Free)
Ingredients: 7-UP Punch 2 oz silken tofu I know most of you have probably tried this 1 1/2 cup frozen unsweetened strawberries with Ginger Ale, but I love it with 7-UP and so 1/2 cup frozen Blueberries Howdy Texas Twister Readers, does my family. 1 each Banana, medium, fresh Hope you are finally drying out from all 1 1/2 cup Fat Free milk these rains we have been having. I told my dear Ingredients: 4 each Splenda no Calorie Sweetener packets. hubby I’m not complaining, because come July 2 quarts 98% fat free vanilla ice cream Directions: or August we will be crying for all this rain. 3 quarts diet 7-Up soda Add all the ingredients to a blender and puree on We finally put our tomato plants in a Directions: high until smooth. large flower pot and put them on the front porch, Spoon ice cream into a large bowl. Stir in 7-Up, Makes 4 servings. since the ground is so wet. I love my tomatoes. leaving small bits of ice cream, and serve. I hope you enjoy these recipes. I thought we Makes 36 servings. Nutritional Values: Amount per serving. could us some cooling off as Summer is about Calories 82.0, Total Carbs 16.0 g, Sugars 11.7 to hit us hard. Nutritional Values: Amount per serving g, Total Fat 0.5 g, Unsaturated Fat 0.2 g, PotasCalories 41.4, Total Carbs 9.2 g, Sugars 6.3 g, sium 104.1 mg, Protein 4.3 g, Sodium 49.4 mg. I want to take this time to thank all our Total Fat 0.7 g, Saturated Fat 0.4 g, Dietary Exchanges: 1 Fruit, 1/2 Milk service men and women and their family, for all Protein 1.0 g, Sodium 33.7 mg. they do for us and the sacrifices they’ve made Dietary Exchanges: 1 1/2 Fat, 1 Other Carb
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Individual Care of Texas, Inc Assisted Living is unique for the type of residents we accept. Pritchett Oil & Grocery Lottery Retailer Most of the people who live here have mental disabilities. This is a 100 bed facility, located about 6 Pritchett Oil & Grocery Valero is located 4 miles west of Quinlan. We are a long term care livmiles South of Quinlan on State Hwy 34 and is lo- ing facility, striving to make it a comfortable home cally owned and operated by Doug & Lecia Pritchett. for our residents. Activities are available for those The Valero features 24-hour access to gas pumps. who wish to attend. We do medication supervision, Our Convenience Store hours are ADL and meal supervision. 6 AM – 10 PM seven days a week. ICT was opened in 1986 and is fully licensed We offer free 12 oz coffee with purchase by the State of Texas. Our employee’s care deeply of gas. Fresh Hunts Brothers Pizza, Texas BarB-Q, for the residents and strive to make this a home away Hormel Chili, Jumbo Hot Dogs and Breakfast Sand- from home for each resident. We also have contracts wiches makes meal time a snap. A wide variety of with Community Care for the Aged and Disabled snacks, drinks and ice creams will satisfy anytime (CCAD) and also with our HMO’s Molina and Suin between. Please come by and see us. We always perior. We also accept private pay. offer monthly drink specials too! ICT would like to thank the LTRCC for 903-356-0600 choosing us as Business of the Month for May, 2015! 1655 Private Rd 2530 PO Box 1810 Quinlan, TX 75474 903-356-4526
The Talent Box Productions Inc. is a 501c3 nonprofit organization located at 244 North 4th Street in Wills Point, Texas. TTBP was established in 2003 by a group of dedicated people who realized the profound impact performing arts has on a community and the need for diversified cultural and family entertainment. We are so excited by the recognition and enthusiasm that we’ve received and the outstanding support for our Children’s Theatre sessions. We are also excited to report standing room only for many of our productions!
Texas Twister
We currently offer a regular production season that offers a weekend of dinner theatre for three productions, children’s classes, a traveling troupe, special events and more! If you have ever wanted to be on stage, backstage, or just to come and enjoy quality entertainment, we invite you to join us! LET US ENTERTAIN YOU! Next Production: The Butler Did it! Performances: June 5 (7:30pm), 6 (7:30pm), 7 (2:00pm) (regular seating)- June 12 (7:30pm), 13 (7:30pm) (Dinner Theatre* 6:30pm)
It’s Spring allergy season and time to refresh your home and office with professional carpet cleaning. Bulldog Carpet Cleaning has been doing business in the Lake Tawakoni area for over 17 years, providing commercial and residential carpet cleaning at affordable prices. They provide odor control, upholstery cleaning, tile and grout cleaning, marble floor and countertop polishing, as well as automobile, boats and RV carpet cleaning. Special for May: Book 3 Rooms of carpets cleaned at regular price and receive an additional 1 room free (up to 144 sq ft). Be sure to mention this ad to receive the May special! Call Bob Hobbs, Owner to book your appointment to have your carpets and floors “Spring Cleaned” today! Fully insured with 100% satisfaction guaranteed! 903-356-0207 903-356-0207 800-551-8140 Mailing Address: P.O. Box 1476 Quinlan, Texas
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broiler pan. Broil 4 to 5 inches from the heat for 15 to
½ tsp. salt
20 minutes or until chicken is light brown, turning once
1.1 tsp. vanilla extract
halfway through broiling. Transfer chicken to a 3 ½ or 4
¼ tsp. ground cinnamon
quart slow cooker.
1/8 tsp. ground nutmeg
In a medium bowl, combine barbecue sauce, honey,
1 egg, lightly beaten
mustard, and Worcestershire sauce. Pour over chicken.
1 ½ c finely chopped fresh or frozen rhubarb
Cover and cook on low-heat 3 to 4 hours or on high heat setting for 1 ½ to 2 hours.
In a small bowl, combine the flour, oats and brown sugar, cut in the butter until crumbly. Set aside 1 cup crumb
Time’s flying and it is already May. I wonder
where March and April went! I have found some great recipes for this month. Easy button has been pushed because I can feel summer so close and as busy as we all will be outside the easy button is going to be needed. And yes, I had to sneak in a rhubarb recipe! I am a Texan, born and breed, but nothing beats something sweet with that tart kick rhubarb adds. I even found a recipe for carrots and I will eat that’s not drowned in cheese sauce! The carrot recipe can be cut in half or quartered if there are 2 or less enjoying the meal. The BBQ chicken recipe calls for drumsticks but my dad and I like wings and breasts so I used those to the total of about 3 pounds. The cooking time was about 30 minutes longer for the breasts, but OH YUMMM!!!!
BARBECUE CHICKEN DRUMSTICKS 12 chicken drumsticks (about 3 pounds) 1 ½ c purchased barbecue sauce ¼ c honey 2 tsp. yellow mustard 1 ½ tsp. Worcestershire sauce Preheat broiler. Place chicken on the unheated rack of a
CRANBERRY-JEWELED CARROTS 8 large carrots, grated (about 6 cups)
mixture; press remaining mixture onto the bottom of a greased 9 inch square baking pan. Set aside.
1 ½ Cups fresh cranberries 3 Granny Smith apples, peeled, cored, finely chopped
For filling, in a small bowl, beat cream cheese & sugar
¾ C apple cider
until smooth. Beat in the salt, vanilla, cinnamon and nut-
6 Tbsp. packed light brown sugar
meg. Add egg; beat on low speed just until combined.
1 ½ tsp. salt
Stir in rhubarb. Pour over crust. Sprinkle with reserved
3 Tbsp. unsalted butter, cut into pieces
crumb mixture. Bake at 350° for 34- 40 minutes or until set. Cool on a
Preheat oven to 350°. Mist a 9 X 13P baking dish with
wire rack for 1 hour. Refrigerate bars for at least 2 hours.
cooking spray. In a large bowl, toss carrots, cranberries,
Cut into squares.
apples, cider, brown sugar and salt and mix well. Transfer
rhubarb while still frozen, then thaw completely, drain in
mixture to baking dish. Dot with butter.
a colander, but do not press liquid out. OH and YUM-
Tightly cover baking dish with foil and bake, stirring once
MM!!!!
or twice, until cranberries are soft and carrots are cooked through, 40 to 50 minutes. Serve Warm. And it’s YUMMMM!!!!
RHUBARB CHEESECAKE SQUARES 1 ¼ c ALL-PURPOSE FLOUR ½ c OLD-FASHIONED OATS ½ c packed brown sugar ½ c cold butter 1 pkg. (8 oz.) cream cheese, softened ¾ C sugar
If you use frozen rhubarb, measure
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OLD AGE AT ITS BEST Larry and Bob, two friends, met in the park every day to feed the pigeons, watch the squirrels and discuss world problems. One day Larry didn’t show up. Bob didn’t think much about it and figured maybe he had a cold or something.. But after Larry hadn’t shown up for a week or so, Bob really got worried. However, since the only time they ever got together was at the park, Bob didn’t know where Larry lived, so he was unable to find out what had happened to him. A month had passed, and Bob figured he had seen the last of Larry, but one day, Bob approached the park and -- lo and behold -- there sat Larry! Bob was very excited and happy to see him and told him so. Then he said, ‘For crying out loud Larry, what in the world happened to you? Larry replied, ‘I have been in jail.’ ‘Jail!’ cried Bob. What in the world for?’ ‘Well,’ Larry said, ‘you know Jane, that cute little blonde waitress at the coffee shop where I sometimes go?’ ‘Yeah,’ said Bob, ‘I remember her. What about her? ‘Well, one day she filed rape charges against me; and, at 95 years old, I was so proud that when I got into court, I pleaded ‘guilty’. ‘The damn judge gave me 30 days for perjury’.
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OUTSIDE SALES IS NOT A GAME, BUT IT CAN BE A LOT OF FUN! Sales Rep Needed Outside Sales Experience and References Required If You Love Outside Sales, We’ve Got The Proven Products! Check out our websites beginning with www.texastwister.us and our online editions. If you are interested, please send your resume to: ginger@texastwister.us. We’re looking for a motivated, organized self starter that can manage their time over a large area and many different types of projects. Outside sales is the main focus. However, as we also meet the needs of our customers with internet marketing, we need someone with those skills and that can bring fresh ideas with a leadership attitude! We’re constantly looking for new ways to promote our customers.
COME GROW WITH US! (Quotas, Schedules and Random Drug Testing are enforced.)