A Toolkit for Effective Parent Conversations

A Guide to Help School Board Members Build Trust and Relationships

We’ve developed this toolkit to help board members like you communicate effectively with parents and families, no matter the topic or the venue.

In today’s educational environment, there is nothing more important than prioritizing and partnering with parents to help advance student outcomes and your district’s overall goals.

Yet, there’s often a lot of apprehension about saying the wrong thing at the wrong time or inadvertently causing misunderstandings or deepening divides. Figuring out how to avoid potential pitfalls is essential to authentically connecting and communicating with parents and family members.

This resource will help trustees consider new avenues or give some ideas for adjustments in process or mindset to parent communication and engagement so elected school boards and individual board members can strengthen their relationships with families.

Some of the practices described here might already be in place in your district, and this toolkit is by no means an exhaustive list of everything that’s possible. Rather, we hope it provides a strong foundation while encouraging ongoing discussion about this essential and evolving topic.

Keeping families informed has been at the center of the home-school connection for generations, with teachers and principals traditionally taking the lead.

Newsletters, Friday folders, websites, phone calls, and report cards are all ways school districts have typically kept families updated on campus events and their student’s progress.

While delivering information is important, it’s only a small part of an effective parent communication plan, which needs to foster trust, build relationships, and encourage conversations.

Board members have a unique role and responsibility in the home-school connection, and their communications should align with their governance role.

Trustees face the challenge of helping families connect the work that takes place in the boardroom with what’s happening in the classroom and throughout the district’s campuses.

This task is more difficult than it may seem, primarily because every parent, rightly so, will judge the effectiveness of the board through their child’s unique learning experience. When all is going well, school boards may hear less from parents. The opposite is also true, particularly when issues or concerns bring crowds to board meetings or prompt a flood of calls, emails, or conversations in the community and media.

In this context, effective parent communication offers school board members a way to move forward, especially when that communication happens often, with openness and sincerity, and with the student as the focus.

Let’s

consider some thoughtful strategies to help.

WHY EFFECTIVE PARENT COMMUNICATION IS MORE IMPORTANT THAN EVER

Trustees face the challenge of helping families connect the work that takes place in the boardroom with what’s happening in the classroom and throughout the district’s campuses.

Understand your board’s communication and engagement style

One of the first steps a new board member can take is to understand how fellow trustees or the board in general approaches parent communication and engagement.

This is an important step to avoid potential misunderstanding among your board, all of whom may have different communication styles or comfort levels. It’s also an opportunity for existing board members to describe current communication and engagement practices and to have discussion about what’s working well or could be improved.

A key question to ask may include: Is there any difference in how we respond to concerns related to a specific individual compared to issues that may have broader implications for the community? Regardless of the answer, the conversation around this question will lead to some thoughtful discussion and insights around your board’s current communication style.

Boards may also want to discuss their expectations around how they want parent or community concerns to be addressed by the superintendent and/or administration. So if a board member forwards a parent complaint to the superintendent, consider establishing guidelines for timely attention and then a system for getting back to the board member with the resolution.

In practice, this might be an agreed turnaround time for the administration to respond to the parent (for example, acknowledging receipt of an email within 48 hours) with a further expectation to follow-up with the referring board member promptly on what specific actions were taken. Having a system in place can ease any concerns that something might fall through the cracks.

If your board has an annual team building or planning retreat, ask that an agenda item around parent communication and engagement be added.

Remember the child at the heart of every conversation

There’s no other elected position that is as close to the community as a school board trustee, who fortunately and frequently has the opportunity to hear from families at the grocery store, in church, at community events, or while running errands.

When parents stop to talk about a specific concern, the most important response is to stay student focused. This mostly involves listening and asking questions so you can better understand the concern at the heart of the conversation and why the parent may be upset.

Once you understand the basics, you’ll be able to take next steps as appropriate, which most often will be relaying the specific concern and circumstances to district administration. It’s essential to not make promises or get involved in parent complaints that may become future grievances.

When having a one-on-one conversation with an upset parent, ask them what resolution(s) they are seeking.

STRATEGIES FOR EFFECTIVE PARENT COMMUNICATION

Know your district and be known in your community

There’s nothing more important for a trustee than being a familiar face in the school district community, attending sports, arts, school, and academic events with regularity. It also provides an element of joy to your work as a school board member.

You’ll see firsthand the experiences of your parents and students, and you’ll naturally be able to consider questions such as:

• What is going well in your district?

• What is making families happy and why?

You’ll also have the opportunity to talk with parents about working together. “As your trustee, I want to work with you to find out more information.”

Parents want to hear that their input is welcomed and encouraged, not merely tolerated. Look for opportunities to ask parents individually or in small groups, such as, “How are things going at school?” or “How can we help improve your experience as a parent in our district?”

The conversations you have with families outside of the boardroom will inform and guide how you serve as a trustee because you’ll have an authentic understanding of what’s working well or what needs improvement.

Ask the school district administration to send you calendar invites for district and school events so you’re always in the loop on what’s happening.

Engage with the parent leaders in your district

Most districts benefit from having involved families who take on leadership and volunteer roles in their schools, usually as part of a PTA/PTO or booster club.

Find out who these volunteer leaders are and make the time to attend these PTA and booster club meetings so you can hear firsthand what’s on the minds of your most involved parents. These parents often have a good understanding of what’s needed at both the school and district level to better serve students. They usually have their ear to the ground on other topics that are being discussed among the larger school community.

Establishing relationships with your parent volunteers is essential to better understanding your district and will help build trust and goodwill that will naturally carry over into the boardroom.

Ask your district administration to develop a board program to recognize and thank your district’s parent volunteers and show appreciation for their dedicated support and involvement.

STRATEGIES FOR EFFECTIVE PARENT COMMUNICATION

If you’re a trustee representing a single-member district, you may wonder if your obligations to those voters who elected you are any different from the district as a whole. This might come up, for example, if you hear from parents or community members impacted by a proposal specific only to your area – such as a school building project, a boundary issue, or a campus leadership change.

You might also wonder how to handle concerns outside of your single-member district that impact an area relative to one of your fellow board trustees.

It’s important to remember that school board trustees are not like other elected public office holders, such as city council members, state legislators or county commissioners. Once elected, a school board member is a “trustee” charged with exercising authority and using district resources for the benefit not only of voters, but also for those without a voice at the ballot box – the children of your district. School board trustees serve as a body corporate. That means that trustees are called upon to serve the needs of the district, and its students, as a whole, not the wishes of a particular block of voters, even in a single-member district, according to this unique governance structure established by the Texas Legislature.

This distinction is often confusing, not just for school board members, but also parents and community members from single-member districts. When faced with a challenge specific to your single-member district or from a single-member district of a fellow board member, your obligation is the same: You’ll want to listen to parents, understand the issues and then make the best decision for the district, and its students, as a whole.

Regularly communicating your obligation to serve the entire district and all students during routine board votes can help make it easier to convey the same message during a board meeting where there may be geographic divides.

AT-LARGE VERSUS SINGLE MEMBER DISTRICT

Intentionally listen to parents outside of the boardroom

A regular board meeting will give parents only a few short minutes to speak on a topic of concern or agenda item. That time limit is often a source of frustration for families who have a lot they want to discuss, particularly if they are concerned about an issue.

Consider setting up regular parent meetings with two to three other board members that comply with the Open Meetings Act (OMA) and allow for more extended conversations with families and community members. These types of forums will feel more informal and may help you connect with parents who may never consider going to a regular board meeting.

It’s important to remember that these meetings are more casual listening opportunities. Their format should not leave the impression that they are official board meetings.

*Note: See section on Communications Outside the Boardroom on page 12 for more details.

To keep these events more intimate, host them in community centers, parks, or other venues away from the schools.

Establish advisory groups of students and parents

Your superintendent may already have established advisory groups that regularly bring recommendations and concerns to the attention of administrators who manage the day-to-day operations of the district.

Your school board may also establish advisory groups as a resource for its governance work, especially in relation to key functions of the board, such as strategic planning, superintendent searches, facility planning, or local policy development.

Creating advisory groups that have a documented charter and purpose — and include a mix of parents, community members and students — will help ensure your board is hearing all perspectives. In addition, a shared decision-making approach will help build trust and involvement.

Make yourself “chief listener” at these advisory meetings so that participants feel like they’re being heard and their suggestions and recommendations are meaningful to the process.

A shared decisionmaking approach will help build trust and involvement.

STRATEGIES FOR EFFECTIVE PARENT COMMUNICATION

Monitor all channels of information

If social media platforms were physical places, they’d be noisy ones. However, one of the most valuable aspects of social media is that you can use it to listen to your community. Parent Facebook pages, for example, can be a good bellwether for what’s on parents’ minds. It can also be a hotbed for gossip and misinformation. By regularly monitoring social media, you will be able to see topics and trends that are of real concern to parents.

Keep in mind, that not everyone on these parent channels will have a student in the district. You may also hear from community members who have opinions about public education in general or who may be trying to promote a partisan viewpoint on a controversial topic such as vouchers or library books.

It’s OK to post and let people know who you are and that you’re listening. If someone reaches out to you directly, thank them for their input and emphasize the common ground you share.

If you’re feeling angry after reading comments, walk away. Do not engage until you’ve had time to calm down, think, and re-evaluate whether the comment warrants a reply.

Should you read anything of particular concern, forward the specific complaint or issue to the superintendent for an administrative response, if appropriate. Avoid sending emails or other electronic communications to fellow trustees as a string of electronic messages may constitute a walking quorum in violation of the Texas Open Meetings Act (OMA).

Monitoring social media for an entire district can be a little overwhelming. You can divide the social media channels among your board members. For example, it could be helpful to have a couple of trustees monitoring the posts and conversations of middle school families while others focus on elementary and high school channels.

By regularly monitoring social media, you will be able to see topics and trends that are of real concern to parents.

Don’t take it personally

Although parenting and parent concerns are very personal, board members should not take comments or actions of parents personally, even when they are presented that way. This mindset is helpful to remember when talking with parents, particularly on topics that may generate a lot of emotion or debate.

Acknowledging the concerns of an upset parent can go a long way to diffusing a potentially volatile situation. One of the most effective practices is to use empathetic listening techniques that help build a connection and establish trust. Some phrases to use include, “Thank you for sharing,” or “I understand how challenging this situation is and I want you to know I’m listening and hearing what you’re saying.”

Those types of attentive and compassionate responses will help keep lines of communication open so that you can gather information that may help resolve the problem or concern.

Empathetic listening works just as well in individual conversations as in board meetings that draw dozens of parents. If there’s an item on a board agenda that brings out crowds, acknowledge the interest by saying, “We know this is a topic that people feel passionate about,” or “We appreciate everyone coming out on this important item. Your feedback is essential.”

Serve as a bridge between schools and families

Trustees have the unique advantage of providing leadership for the district without being on campus or in the administration building each day.

This gives school board members an opportunity to help those who are on the front lines understand and better appreciate the concerns of families who are deeply interested in what’s happening at school, but not there to observe hour to hour.

Use empathetic listening techniques that help build connection and establish trust.

Do not be afraid to say, “As someone who is not on campus each day, I think we need to go to great lengths to explain what this means.” Educators are working so hard to meet the needs of their students, as they should, and that puts trustees in the best position to describe how things look from outside the building.

Ask district administration to set up quarterly meetings between teachers and two to three trustees to offer educators a direct way to communicate with school board members. These meetings could be done by level — elementary, middle, or high school, or by region in larger districts.

STRATEGIES FOR EFFECTIVE PARENT COMMUNICATION

PRACTICAL WAYS TO PUT PARENTS FIRST Strategic Listening Tips

Parent engagement is an integral part of how individual trustees and the board as a whole best serve the students in your district. Some things to consider:

• Are you building relationships or just listening to complaints? Your board needs to look at listening as a long-term strategy to build relationships and consensus in your community.

• How does what board members are hearing from the community impact policy making? As you engage with parents, it’s important to have a system to track trends to inform decisions.

• What is the protocol for follow-up? Boards should have a clear chain of communicating concerns to administration as well as a way to know when concerns have been addressed.

• Are you hearing from all the members in your community? Not all parents participate in their children’s education in the same way. Be sure your board is providing avenues of engagement in a variety of ways to reach a variety of parents.

o Dual language and other campus programs are an excellent avenue for reaching more parents.

o Inquire how the district communicates with families through other channels and how information gets translated.

o Partner with clergy or community organizations such as the United Way, YMCA or Boys and Girls Club of America to be able to hear from more parents.

o Extracurricular activities are often the common ground in school communities, so look for the parents who attend these events but aren’t necessarily out in front or vocal.

Parent communication is an evolving experience amid an educational landscape that is constantly changing because of legal, political and cultural influences.

If you find yourself in a situation that is quickly escalating or where you’re being asked questions that you don’t feel comfortable answering or don’t have the immediate answers to, it’s worth trying to redirect the conversation. Here are some sample phrases to use:

• I see that you have strong feelings on this issue, and I appreciate your sharing them with me. I’m going to convey your concerns to our superintendent and district leadership.

• Thank you for letting me know your feelings on this topic. Rest assured, I’m going to share all your feedback and questions with district leadership so we can address them.

• Everyone agrees that parents are the most important decisionmakers in a child’s education and everything our district does is centered on this fact.

• I don’t have all the answers to your questions right now, but I can assure you that we’re compiling all the concerns and feedback we receive so we can continue to serve you and all of our families.

COMMUNICATIONS OUTSIDE THE BOARDROOM

It’s important for new and experienced trustees to remember that the Texas Open Meetings Act (OMA) applies to communications that happen outside of the boardroom if ANY school business is being discussed.

This means that trustees should be careful with both their in-person and electronic communications with other board members no matter where these conversations take place.

Consider this scenario. You and two fellow trustees decide to hold a listening meeting with teachers and/ or parents at a venue outside of the boardroom to hear feedback on topics those in attendance wish to discuss.

The goal for you and the other trustees is to connect with people who otherwise would not attend a regularly scheduled board meeting. You’re also hoping the less formal setting will encourage more conversation. Here are some steps that will help you avoid any legal risks related to this gathering:

1) Post the date, time, and place of the meeting on the website, noting that no action will be taken by board members in attendance and a quorum is not expected.

2) Avoid discussing any issues you think might come up at this gathering with other board members either in-person or via email or text. Remember, the meeting is a listening session, not a workshop or official board meeting.

3) Once at the gathering, re-state the goals: You’re there to listen, no action will be taken.

4) Ask the district administration to provide a staff person to be in attendance to gather any feedback to take back to the superintendent so that it can be shared at a future board meeting.

5) Understand and avoid the potential for a walking quorum, which the Texas Attorney General has determined occurs when members of a school board gather in number that do not physically constitute a quorum, but who discuss school business and then share that discussion with other trustees. More simply, let the district staff collect the feedback so that the superintendent can bring any topics or discussion items to the board.

6) Don’t discuss any issues that surface at the gathering with other board members either in person or electronically either during or after the meeting. If you want to discuss a matter with the board, talk to the superintendent or board president about placing the item on a future board meeting agenda.

Understanding the nuances of the OMA as it relates to parent and electronic communications can be challenging. For more information, please visit tasb.org/members/ enhance-district/electronic-communications/

STRATEGIES SUMMARY

There’s no closer alignment of goals than those shared between parents and trustees. Families want an excellent education for their student and school board members want excellent outcomes for all students in their district.

Yet, this common ground is often not enough to sustain a successful relationship between families and school boards, particularly when there are inevitable disagreements over issues big and small.

As we’ve shown in this toolkit, effective parent communications can reliably help bridge those divides when done consistently and with the mindset that students learn best when their families are deeply connected with what is happening in their child’s school and within the overall district.

This essential partnership leaves no room for an “us-versus-them” approach. Elected trustees have the important duty to use the position they’ve been entrusted with to encourage parent participation both in the boardroom and in the classroom.

With parents as advocates for their child’s education and partners in the district’s overall mission, school boards and individual trustees can become stronger, more successful leaders of their community’s public schools.

PARENT CONVERSATION SCENARIOS

There’s no way to prepare for every possible conversation that might arise with a parent, but here are some scenarios to consider:

Library books

A parent wants to know what the board is going to do about certain books in the library and the process for banning books.

A good place to start is to review the process the board and/or district has for reviewing library materials. It would be a good idea to have a person to contact or an online form for these kinds of concerns and to allow for follow-up with district administration. You can let parents know, if they don’t already, that the READER Act was signed into law and has a process for book vendors and librarians to follow in reviewing materials. You can encourage the parent to give that process some time.

It might also be helpful to ask the parent what kind of books their child likes to read. Are there enough of these kinds of books in the school library currently?

Adding a more positive and personal element into the conversation can help diffuse some of the frustration and fear of the unknown that a parent may be feeling. You could even say, “Have you met the librarian at (school name)? I understand she has a special knack for connecting students to books they really love.”

Curriculum concerns

Curriculum is often an area where families feel they have been left out of the conversation. There are a number of ways you can reassure them about district curriculum decisions. For example, district policy on human sexuality curriculum has parents’ rights front and center.

You can say to parents, “Did you know that families have to opt-in for any lessons on human sexuality? We take your parental right to know what your student is learning very seriously.” Then you can direct them to the best way to access the student handbook and the guidelines on this curriculum for your district.

For districts that use TASB’s Model Student Handbook, the first section of the student handbook is “Parental Rights.” Trustees should read this section so that they can knowledgeably refer families to this useful resource to address potential concerns, from access to student records to reciting the pledge.

If you want to go the extra mile, you could have the handbook bookmarked on your phone’s web browser to easily show parents the “Parental Rights” section. Sometimes just knowing that there is access to information can lower the temperature of a conversation.

Remember, though, that policy conversations are often complex. Consider your own questions and concerns related to curriculum topics during board meetings and then consider whether families might have the same questions or different ones. It’s important that in conversations with families you connect decisions being made about curriculum to the district’s overall mission and goals as well as state standards.

Curriculum is often an area where families feel they have been left out of the conversation.

Rumors and speculation

Conversations that start with “I heard...” can be challenging. Parents “heard” that a certain teacher did something, or “heard” that other students were bullying kids, or “heard” that a principal was rude to a parent. The genesis of these conversations could be social media or even the carpool line. These conversations are usually borne out of an individual’s frustration or fear, so where a parent heard the information is not the best place to start.

If there is a story that you know is circulating around the district, you could start with, “I heard that, too. Let me tell you what I know about that situation.” Then you can give the facts to this parent to the best of your ability, without violating employee privacy laws or the Family Educational Rights and Privacy Act.

There are many situations that you cannot talk about because that would violate district policies. It’s okay to say that. “Unfortunately, I can’t speak to that specific situation. I can tell you that a lot of good people are trying their best to support the (teacher/student/family) involved.” Then consider sharing something positive that is happening on that campus or the district that the person may not be aware of. “Did you know that ...?”

If the information they “heard” is not based on actual events or has been distorted, it’s okay to state that directly. “I can’t discuss that with you, but I can tell you that is not what happened.” There is a difference between being direct and being combative. You can be direct with empathy for the situation and the parent’s concerns, without getting into specifics or gossip.

There are many situations that you cannot talk about because that would violate district policies. It’s okay to say that.

CREATING A WELCOMING BOARD MEETING

A lot of the most contentious issues facing public education these days are being tried in the court of public opinion — on social media, blogs, newspapers, TV news, and during the public comment portion of school board meetings.

With a more engaged public, understanding the legal requirements of the Open Meetings Act (OMA) as it relates to conducting school business isn’t always enough, especially as more family members and community members turn out to school board meetings.

Learning how to embrace public comments, both from a legal and a public relations perspective, is increasingly important to avoid both litigation and negative headlines, as well as to build a strong relationship with your community and families.

Here are some best practices for creating a welcoming board meeting that truly embrace parent input and comply with OMA:

POST MEETING AGENDAS IN ADVANCE

School boards need to post their meeting agendas 72 hours in advance and publish the date and time of the meeting so interested members of the public can attend.

If you know a particular item will draw a large turnout, make sure you have enough space and seating. If it’s necessary to change the usual meeting location to accommodate that turnout, inform parents and the community in as many ways as possible, including social media and the website — not just on the posted agenda.

Plan ahead. Although you may need to move your board meeting to a bigger room across the hall on the night of the meeting, you cannot change the physical address of where the meeting is being held after the agenda has been posted.

EACH PERSON IS ALLOWED TO SPEAK

School boards must allow “each member of the public” to speak on any agenda item.

Under OMA, school boards can no longer ask groups of people speaking out on the same topic from the same viewpoint to designate a spokesperson. If you have 100 people in the room who want to speak, you need to give them each the opportunity to address the board.

School boards may limit the amount of time given to each speaker, but a minimum of one minute is recommended. The goal is to hear the feedback, so make the environment comfortable and give parents enough time to be heard.

School boards may require anyone who wants to speak to sign up before the meeting by an established deadline, such as 10:30 a.m. the day of the meeting. That gives district officials the opportunity to review the list and contact scheduled speakers before the meeting to discuss their concerns in more detail.

If your board has a sign-up process, make the procedure easy to find on the district website to avoid confusion and to counter any perception that it’s onerous to do so.

ALLOW PUBLIC COMMENT BEFORE OR DURING CONSIDERATION OF THE ITEM

School boards must allow public comment on an agenda item at the meeting before or during the consideration of the item.

This provision of OMA is intended to keep boards from debating or voting on an item before allowing the public to comment on it. Although boards have flexibility on how they order business at a meeting, the goal is to ensure members of the public may express their views on an issue before a vote is taken.

From a parent engagement perspective, boards should not push those items that may draw a lot of speakers until

TIP

the end of an agenda, as a long wait to speak may escalate potential tensions. Waiting hours to speak at lengthy board meetings, especially for families who have brought their kids with them, is not parent friendly.

Board presidents should look at the agenda with a parent-friendly lens. If a large turnout is expected at a meeting, it’s OK to order items so that parents may comment at the beginning of the meeting.

CRITICAL REMARKS ARE PROTECTED

School boards should not shut down critical remarks or stop comments just because they are disagreeable.

As school board meetings attract larger crowds, it’s important to remember that OMA protects public criticism. This means that trustees should not try to interrupt or stop speakers who are openly disparaging or being critical about the district, its programs, or even its staff.

It’s OK to refer people to the grievance process if they have specific complaints about an employee, but it’s important not to restrict speakers who may be rude or disagreeable.

Even amid a contentious meeting with lots of public comments, there is much that trustees can do to mitigate potential problems by being courteous, respectful, and fair with each speaker, regardless of their opinions and comments. This includes:

• Keeping a neutral facial expression

• Paying attention and putting down the phone

• Focusing on the speaker

• Thanking each speaker for coming

Delegate timekeeping to a district employee who can be firm but courteous in making sure everyone has the same time to speak, regardless of what they say. A digital clock visible to the podium speaker, as well as the audience, will help keep people on track.

HELP ATTENDEES UNDERSTAND THE RULES

In planning for the public comment portion of a meeting, there is much you can do to ensure a smooth experience for everyone.

A parent who wants to speak at the next board meeting shouldn’t have to go digging through layers of the district website to learn when the meeting is or how to speak up. Make all the information they need — from times and locations to public comment time limits and expected decorum to logistics — easy to find.

Consider printing out the rules for public comment that can be given to attendees when they arrive. Another idea used by some districts is to create a short video featuring students detailing the procedures and protocols of a board meeting that can be shown ahead of the public comment portion of the meeting. It sets a friendly tone and also helps keep a student focus. Ask district administrators to prepare a script for the presiding officer to remind attendees about the policies and procedures for the meeting.

Public comments are a legal obligation for a school board meeting. But trustees and district staff have the opportunity to build trust with their families and communities by taking extra steps to ensure the process not only complies with the law but also makes people feel welcome and respected.

People will remember how they were received and treated at a board meeting, regardless of the issue that brought them out to speak.

The presiding board officer who is running the public comment portion should use a consistent tone with everyone, taking time to thank each speaker.

HOW TO HANDLE POTENTIAL GRIEVANCES

Trustees often hear from parents, and even staff members, with very specific and personal complaints involving something that may have happened with a district employee, including claims of bullying, harassment, unfair treatment, student-teacher issues, or discrimination.

Grievance policies

Trustees should be aware of their duties and responsibilities in managing parent or employee complaints. First, school boards are required to adopt local grievance policies. The Texas Education Code outlines a review process for grievances involving parents. Both the Texas Education Code and Texas Labor Code require avenues for complaints by employees. Finally, the Texas Constitution allows citizens to petition the government — including public school districts — for the redress of grievances.

Districts with policy manuals through TASB Policy Service have three separate grievance policies: DGBA(LOCAL) for employee grievances; FNG(LOCAL) for student and parent grievances; and GF(LOCAL) for grievances by all others, including vendors and taxpayers.

TEA “encourages and supports parents and school staff in their efforts to reach a resolution locally.” If informal resolution fails, written complaints can be made, and typically these complaints can escalate to the board of trustees for resolution. As a team of eight, you should discuss and be clear on your district’s grievance processes. As a trustee, you may be called upon to play a role in the appeals process if a grievance can’t be resolved at an administrative level.

How to help parents with a complaint

So imagine a parent comes up to you at the grocery store or corners you after a board meeting to tell you that her daughter’s math teacher won’t give bathroom passes because they have not been returned previously. The class is right after lunch, and it is having an impact on her daughter’s ability to concentrate in class. The parent is upset and says she had been unable to resolve the situation with either the teacher or the school principal.

They have both told her that her daughter should be sure to visit the bathroom during the lunch period.

In this scenario, the important fact is the parent appears to have already attempted to address her complaint informally by contacting the campus teacher and principal. That should always be the first recommendation if a parent hasn’t already done so. If that informal resolution process has not worked, the next step is to gently shift the focus of the conversation to the district’s grievance process.

Many school boards adopt a local policy that speaks to this. For example, TASB recommends the following provision at BBE(LOCAL): “If employees, parents, students, or other members of the public bring concerns or complaints to an individual board member, he or she shall refer them to the superintendent or another appropriate administrator, who shall proceed according to the applicable complaint policy. [See (LOCAL) policies at DGBA, FNG, and GF]”

Here are some talking points that might help ensure you’re able to give the parent important information without compromising a process that might require you, as a school board trustee, to hear the complaint at a later date and determine a resolution:

• Thank you for reaching out to the teacher and principal first. I know this must be really frustrating for you and your daughter. I will personally let the superintendent know that you have concerns and may be reaching out for next steps, including possibly filing a written complaint.

• There is a process the district follows on formal complaints. The steps are detailed in our Board Policy Manual, which is available on the district’s website. All the information about the process for a parent is under Local Policy FNG.

• If you have any problem finding that information, please let our superintendent know and he or she can direct you to the details, including the complaint form.

• If the problems in your child’s classroom can’t be resolved, there’s the possibility that the complaint could come before the school board for a hearing.

• In order for that process to be fair for everyone, it’s important to follow the steps and the timelines carefully.

• If I were to get involved right now, that may require me to recuse myself later and I definitely want to make sure you have every opportunity to get this resolved, and if necessary, have a fair hearing if it comes before the board.

Follow-up is important

There is a lot of power in following up after a discussion with a parent, especially if they were upset. The simple act of asking for their name and email so you can pass that on to the superintendent or appropriate person in the district will help the parent know you took their concern seriously. You don’t want to get into the middle of the problem, but you can ask the superintendent to let you know what actions were taken in response to the parent’s concern so you’ll be assured the issue was addressed.

WHEN PARENTS COMPLAIN TO YOU ABOUT THE SUPERINTENDENT

One of the key duties of being a school board member is hiring and evaluating your district’s superintendent. In fact, this responsibility is spelled out in Texas law and in the Texas Education Code.

It can be challenging, however, when parents or community members complain about your district’s leader. You may wonder how to address and resolve those concerns in a way that is both respectful and in line with your statutory requirements.

First of all, listen to what the person is telling you and thank them for sharing their concerns. Depending on your board, what you do next may vary. Here are some possible ways to handle:

• If you regularly meet with the superintendent, tell them about the concern or complaint and ask them to tell you about the situation that led to the complaint.

• If you don’t regularly meet with your superintendent, consider telling your board president who probably already is having consistent communications with the superintendent.

If the concern is a one-time issue that can be addressed and resolved, then no further action may be needed. However, if you or any board members continue to hear complaints or become aware of a pattern of complaints, then it’s possible the board may want to take corrective actions with specific performance expectations as part of the superintendent evaluation process. Remember, these performance conversations must be kept confidential under state law, which prohibits making public any personnel document evaluating the performance of a teacher or administrator.

KEY TAKEWAYS AND NEXT STEPS

Although this toolkit is designed to provide helpful strategies and tips for strengthening communications with parents and community members, it does not include all of the possible situations and nuances that may be faced by school board members as they fulfill their roles as trustees.

Regardless of the situation, trustees should remember a few key takeaways to help:

• As a school board member, you’re part of a team so leverage that support when dealing with a challenging situation.

• Parents should always be considered the MVPs on your team because all the research shows that when parents are involved and positively engaged, students win.

One of the best ways to build confidence around having parent conversations is to prepare and practice for these types of communications. Although role playing and scenarios will help, experts say it’s even more important to practice the skill of emotional regulation so heightened feelings or stress don’t derail communications in the moment.

Put more simply, that means truly listening to parents with an open mind and from the perspective that everyone needs to be on the same team when it comes to pursuing educational excellence for all students.

Checklist

Clear and Responsive Communication with Parents

Parents often come to board members with concerns first because they see trustees as the community’s link to the district overall. Every interaction with parents is an opportunity to build relationships and trust with community members. Each is also an educational moment to help parents and families understand the role of trustees in the district and how to navigate the school district effectively.

Here’s a simple checklist that summarizes some of the key strategies for having clear and responsive conversations with parents and families:

1 Be sure the parent feels heard.

• Communicate empathy for their concern and be sure to ask clarifying questions so you fully understand their position and need.

• Remember, empathy should convey understanding so it’s important to watch tone and body language to avoid appearing either that you’re in agreement with what’s being said or conveying anything that could be viewed as being condescending or judgmental.

• This is a tough balance but gets easier with practice.

2 Educate parents on relevant policies and processes.

• This may include directing them to the chain of command and formal grievance process or identifying policies that are already in place related to the concern.

• This is also an important time to communicate your role as a trustee and any legal limitations to responding.

• Identify the most knowledgeable district contact who could help them, especially if you are unsure of the relevant policies and procedures.

• Summarize their next steps and any involvement you will have (e.g., passing the concern on to the superintendent).

3 Focus on common ground.

Even if you do not share the parent’s perspective on a particular issue, there is always an opportunity to build bridges by focusing on shared goals. Thank them for their perspective and the commitment to excellence in the district that it represents. That’s a goal everyone can get behind.