Submerge Magazine: Issue 203 (December 21, 2015 - January 4, 2016)

Dive into Sacramento & its Surrounding Areas december 21, 2015 – January 4, 2016

#203

Sai Wong Ramen Empire 3

Dance Lessons for Just $1

the good fortune straight from the soul

16 2016!

vN Y E Parties to Usher In

0 to 26.2 our writer's resolution to

run a marathon in 365 days

Bring Home a New Fur Friend for the Holidays

dj crook free

the life of the party

TickeTs & GifT cerTificaTes Make GreaT GifTs! thur, deceMber 31

ViSit hiStoric GraSS Valley for neW yearS eVe!

Wed, january 13

Simon Phillips’ Protocol

Sun, february 28

Ani DiFranco

with andy timmons, ernest tibbs and Steve Weingart

Laughs, Lolo & Legs!

Special Guests: rupa & the april fishes

neo Vintage jazz pop: lolo Gervais, comedy: Katie rubin, burlesque: bow tie beauties, dj jamal Walker Tix range from $22 - $122 $122 ticket includes winemakers dinner

Saturday, january 9

VeteranS MeMorial auditoriuM 255 S. auBurn ST, GraSS valley $22 member, $24 non-member

$38.50 member, $48.50 non-member

Saturday, january 30

friday, february 5

Saturday, february 20

Sunday, february 21

Special Guests: lorraine Gervais, Kate Haight, Peter Wilson & Jacob aginsky

riders in the Sky

Marc cohn

Sean hayes

alo

$18 member, $22 non-member

$30 member, $34 non-member

$47 member, $52 non-member

$27 advance, $32 door

$24 member, $27 non-member

friday, february 26

Saturday, March 5

Saturday, March 26

Saturday, april 9

friday, april 29

the chillbillies

elvis’ 81st birthday party

From Punch Brothers:

noam pikelny

darlingside

behind the lens Photographers Pattie Boyd and

the Smithereens

One Man, One Banjo, One Joke

Special Guests: caitlin canty

Henry Diltz present a multi-media show of their extraordinary lives.

Makana

$27 member, $30 non-member

$20 member, $24 non-member

$24 member, $27 non-member

$20 member, $24 non-member

Play Songs From The Who $30 member, $34 non-member

530.274.8384 • 314 W. Main St, GraSS Valley all shows at our intimate Main StaGe theater unless otherwise noted

B e co m e a m e m B e r & Sav e

For a complete listing of events visit:

thecenterfortheartS.orG 2

Issue 203 • December 21, 2015 – January 4, 2016

*Ticket prices do not include applicable fees

Dive Into Sacramento & Its Surrounding Areas

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1217 21st stReet MidtOwn sacRaMentO 916.440.0401 kuproscrafthouse.com @kuprossacto Issue 203 • December 21, 2015 – January 4, 2016

3

Submerge: an independently owned entertainment/lifestyle publication available for free biweekly throughout the greater Sacramento area.

203 2015 2016 december 21 – january 4 cofounder/ Editor in Chief/Art Director

Melissa Welliver melissa@ submergemag.com cofounder/ Advertising Director

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Issue 203 • December 21, 2015 – January 4, 2016

calendar

wars: The 10 star 28 Force Awakens

a running resolution

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Submerge your senses

the shallow end

18

Sai Wong

the grindhouse

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Contributing Writers

Zach Ahern, Amber Amey, Ellen Baker, Bocephus Chigger, Ronnie Cline, Justin Cox, Alia Cruz, Josh Fernandez, Catherine Foss, Andy Garcia, Fabian Garcia, Blake Gillespie, Lovelle Harris, Eddie Jorgensen, Niki Kangas, Derek Kaplan, Nur Kausar, John Phillips, Ryan Prado, Andrew C. Russell, Amy Serna, Jacob Sprecher Contributing photographers

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All content is property of Submerge and may not be reproduced without permission. Submerge is both owned and published by Submerge Media. All opinions expressed throughout Submerge are those of the author and do not necessarily mean we all share those opinions. Feel free to take a copy or two for free, but please don’t remove our papers or throw them away.

Submerge welcomes letters of all kinds, whether they are full of love or hate. We want to know what is on your mind, so feel free to contact us via snail mail at 1009 22nd Street, Suite 3 Sacramento, California 95816.

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Dive Into Sacramento & Its Surrounding Areas

dive in Mandy Johnston Pearson, You Are the Most Amaze-Balls Person I’ve Ever known Melissa welliver melissa@submergemag.com

On Friday, Dec. 11, 2015, one of my dearest friends, Mandy Johnston Pearson, passed away.

When my husband Jonathan and I started Submerge years ago, Mandy reached out because of her love for journalism. She offered to help do a little editing for our newborn publication during her spare time. I had already known Mandy for years. I was lucky enough to meet and become good friends with this brilliant lady 15 years ago, when we worked together at a publication in our college town of Chico.

However, it was during our time working closely together after starting Submerge when I truly feel like we became the bestest of friends.

In this time of our lives, where everyone is growing up and unfortunately growing apart, interests change. That’s just how life goes when people move, or get new careers, or have families. But I feel like Mandy and I happened to do a rare thing: we grew closer together as we got older.

“Work” was the reason we constantly chatted, but realistically 90 percent of our conversations were just about life itself.

From silly shit like informing me she was eating Pop-Tarts and drinking vodka for dinner, to how it was her birthday so she forced her husband John to watch American Horror Story even though he hates scary things, to the more serious stuff like getting married, to the trials and tribulations of each of us buying our first homes, to her being diagnosed with and beating cancer, and eventually to her decision to stop with chemo treatments this past October after her cervical cancer unfortunately had returned and spread to other areas of her body.

I’ve never lost a really close friend before. It’s been rough. While I struggle with being extremely sad about the world losing someone so amazing (and yes, she was way too young, just 34), I like to think about the impression she left on everyone whose paths she crossed.

And what gets me through each day is knowing I was one of those people lucky enough to experience one of the kindest souls with the wittiest sense of humors I’ve personally ever known.

SubmergeMag.com

Mandy will always be remembered as the most “amaze-balls” person I’ve known. Oh, how she loved her word, amaze-balls.

And so it goes. Life. It’s great at times, and unfair at others. You can’t help but be mentally exhausted asking yourself why bad things, like getting cancer fucking twice, happen to such good people. But rather than get caught up in those types of questions, I’d love to remember the great times with Mandy.

For me, just a few of the greatest times in chronological order were: When we sang all of the songs from My Chemical Romance’s Three Cheers for Sweet Revenge together, especially the song “I’m Not Okay (I Promise).”

When we went to a Halloween party in 2005 (I think) with a group of friends at a barn where our buddies were playing as an Andrew W.K. cover band for one night only. We raged, we “partied hard,” but what I remember the most was the moment she announced that she was gonna start dating this “new guy,” John.

I’ve never seen her so alive, so happy.

When I got to witness Mandy and John Pearson getting married years later. From their cute bike entrance to the reception and their first dance. Then everything afterward. Soul mates.

When Mandy interviewed celebrity chef/writer Anthony Bourdain for Submerge, then he re-shared the link over Twitter and thanked her for the great interview.

When Mandy beat cancer for the first time, and she couldn’t turn down anything, I presented her with the opportunity to skydive with the Red Bull Air Force for an article, and she did it.

In memory of my dear friend Mandy, alongside the thoughts of her husband, “Accept each moment for what it is. Be present and find beauty in all things.”

Enjoy issue #203. And consider making it your 2016 resolution to hang out and/or talk with the people you love the most and those people who’ve meant the most to you over the years.

Melissa

i n l o v i n g m e m o ry o f

Mandy Johnston Pearson November 2, 1981 - December 11, 2015

Issue 203 • December 21, 2015 – January 4, 2016

5

Move In SacraMento jennifer

hayes CalBRE# 01343344

The stream With New Ownership, Expect More Live Music and DJ Nights at Pour House

Serving Buyers and Sellers in Sacramento Since 2002

Jonathan Carabba

Send regional news tips to info@submergemag.com

Looking for a place to call home?

Do you need to sell a property?

How about an investment property or second home?

916.798.1786 • MoveInSacraMento.coM Facebook.com/moveInsacramento 2801 J Street, SacraMento, ca

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movie 7:30pm $8 - $10

movie 7pm $8 - $10

When Bob Shallit of The Sacramento Bee first reported in early October that the Midtown Sacramento bar/restaurant/ venue Pour House was being sold, we sort of shrugged it off and thought to ourselves something along the lines of, “We sure hope the new owners utilize the stage that’s in there and throw more shows!” Looks like our prayers may be answered. Turns out the new ownership group is none other than the rad dudes behind Dad’s Sandwiches and Dad’s On J, D.J. Rogers and Mick Stevenson, who are known to be heavily involved in the local music scene. Justin Isaacks has worked with Rogers and Stevenson for years and is also involved with Shuffle Six, a local promotions company that throws killer metal/punk shows at various venues around town. Isaacks recently told Submerge that, “We will be booking

shows here [Pour House] definitely. Not necessarily the heavy or hard punk stuff, but shows and DJ nights for sure. A lot more so than the previous owners, who kinda just outsourced the booking.”

Isaacks also mentioned that the back bar at Pour House, which had been converted into a vape bar by the previous owners, is being turned back into a regular bar where they’ll hold their DJ nights. Of the new back bar, Isaacks said to expect a “laid-back style” and that it will be “divey for locals that are into good music.”

Isaacks also gave us an early look at what Pour House’s new weekly schedule will look like: “Heavy Mondays” will take place in the back bar, where they’ll be playing heavy metal, new and old, and every other Monday night they’ll have game night and trivia hosted by the Bruce

twins in the front bar; Tuesday nights will be “Loveless Tuesdays,” (dream pop, shoegaze); Wednesday nights will be “Youth Cult Wednesdays” (post-punk, new wave, goth, deathrock); Thursday nights will be “Trash Rock Thursdays” (indie, garage, classic rock) in the back bar, while in the front bar Gerald Bucho and Mick Stevenson will host an acoustic jam; Friday nights will be “Feel Good Fridays” (‘90’s hip-hop and R&B), except for the first Friday of every month, when the ‘90s cover band Total Recall will play; and finally, Saturdays are when we can expect a “rotating stable of bands.” Phew, that’s a lot of stuff.

Check out Facebook.com/ pourhousemidtown for more info on the changes, and to check out details for their New Year’s Eve, where they’ll host two parties under one roof!

doors 8:30pm $35 - $65

movie 7:30pm $8 - $10

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$10 - 12 $35 for pass

1013 K sTreeT downtown sacramento (916) 476-3356 • cresTsacraMenTo.coM

6

Issue 203 • December 21, 2015 – January 4, 2016

1 - 8pm tues-sun

Walk-Ins Welcome

1018 22nd St. Sacto•916.758.5958•chiefpiercing.net Dive Into Sacramento & Its Surrounding Areas

The Optimistic Pessimist These Are the Droids You Are Looking For

Bocephus Chigger bocephus@submergemag.com

If any of your five senses currently function,

Sorry, I got caught up in the fever.

then you already know that a new Star Wars

It’s hard not to; like I said, it’s almost

movie is out now. I have yet to see it, but I

everywhere. And therein lies the problem.

was happy to hear that George Lucas wouldn’t

Star Wars is almost everywhere, but it’s not

be around to fuck it all up again. Lord only

everywhere. It could be in more places. If this

knows what kind of despicable character he

advertising campaign has taught me anything,

would create if given another chance. Disney

it’s that more is better. There has got to be

certainly wants the world to believe that the

something else we can slap a picture of a

old Star Wars is back, as those rat bastards

Chewbacca on.

reportedly paid $4 billion to remove Lucas’ iron chokehold from the neck of LucasArts and its crown jewel.

You read that right. Disney paid $4 billion

Of course there is. I have some excellent ideas for you advertising wizards out there.

Where are the BB-8 droid butt plugs? How

keep Walt Disney’s head frozen, so Mickey

about the Lightsaber dildos? At least give

Mouse and Co. need to get that money back,

us condoms that are protected by the Force.

toot sweet. That’s why Disney is wasting no

People like sex, and they like sex toys and

time cashing in on their newest baby. The ads

condoms. A lot of those same people love Star

and licensed products are almost everywhere.

Wars, so why not give them what they really

It’s nearly impossible to watch TV or go

want? so I’m kind of surprised they were overlooked.

makes sense or not. For example, did you

Chewbacca hair products are another prime

know that Sith Lords eat spicy Popchips and

example of a missed opportunity. He is

that the Rebel Alliance keeps the troops

covered in hair for Christ’s sake! Hell, you

fed with $5 foot-longs from Subway and

could have even gone with Ewoks for the baby

Campbell’s Chicken Noodle Soup? Apparently,

shampoo. It doesn’t matter if they are in the

in the power vacuum left behind by the fall of

new movies or not. If it ever had something to

the Empire, Verizon stepped in to handle cell

do with Star Wars, it’s fair game.

It could have been perfect, but instead

of the Imperial forces alike. And of course,

we have this. How can I survive without C-3P0

none of them are getting anywhere unless

gold teeth, or Jawa contact lens cleaner? Why

it’s in a Jeep, Chrysler, Dodge or Fiat, because

doesn’t my doorbell sound like a blaster going

cars apparently work in space.

off every time it rings? Life without these

Where will it all end? Are they going to

wonder products sounds dull and depressing,

start selling tauntaun meat at Safeway? You

and I don’t even have my Darth Vader Anti-

might laugh, but in Europe they are already

Depressants to help me through it all.

selling Darth Vader Foie Gras and Anakin

That is a travesty. That shouldn’t happen.

Skywalker Chicken Hot Dogs stuffed with

We can do better and we will. Advertising

ketchup, so it’s really not much of a stretch.

execs, take a cue from the title of the latest

On this side of the pond, you can buy oranges

Star Wars movie and let the Force awaken in

with BB-8 droids, apples with Darth Vader and

you; and by that I mean, don’t stop forcing

grapes with Yoda on the bag, right now. RIGHT

this crap down people’s throats until they see

NOW! WHY ARE YOU STILL HERE? GO BUY THEM

this damn movie … or else!

DAMN YODA GRAPES, ALREADY!

SubmergeMag.com

sATUrdAY

CorY Morrow

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And tHe Midtown Moxies

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A HepcAt HolidAy witH

Big eyed FisH

A triBute to tHe dAve MAttHews BAnd

new yeAr’s eve witH

MUsTAChe hArbor

I feel like those are pretty obvious tie-ins,

related to Star Wars, whether the pairing

service for both the Rebels and the remnants

ChUCk rAgAn

There are at least two more movies left to go, so pay attention and get it right next time.

for Star Wars. Now, it costs a lot of money to

anywhere in public without seeing something

2708 J Street Sacramento 916.441.4693 HarlowS.com

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Mania: beatles experience Peace killers {late} The Motet Joy & Madness steelin’ dan some fear none {late} glen Phillips foreverland

2/19 2/23 2/26 3/05 3/08 3/19 5/20

Issue 203 • December 21, 2015 – January 4, 2016

Alo infamous stringdusters david lindley dengue fever Anderson east The brothers Comatose kris Allen

7

9 9426 Greenback ln, Orangevale 9426 Greenback ln, Orangevale Tickets Available at Dimple Records, Armadillo records , or online at Tickets Available at Dimple Records, Armadillo records , or online at theboardwalkpresents.com theboardwalkpresents.com all shows

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SUnDAy january 24 t 18

8

FRiDAy

january 29 SATURDAy january 3023 TUeSDAy february 2 fRiDAy Oct

Issue 203 • December 21, 2015 – January 4, 2016

Dive Into Sacramento & Its Surrounding Areas

T

t

a

9426 Greenback ln, Orangevale 9426 Greenback ln, Oran Tickets Tickets Available at DimpleAvailable Records, Armadillo records, or at online Dimple at Records,

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ThURSDAy february 25 SATURDAy march 5 FRiDAy weDnesDAy nOv

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april 10 SUnDAy april 17 FRiDAy april 22 ThuRsDAy nOv 12

SubmergeMag.com

SATURDAy

april 30fRiDA

Issue 203 • December 21, 2015 – January 4, 2016

9

The grindhouse

Passing the Torch … er, Lightsaber Star Wars: The Force Awakens Rated PG-13 It’s time to give George Lucas his due. He has done pretty well for himself after all.

And yes, I know there are a lot of you nerds out there who are still bummed that the lackluster prequels were more hype than substance (hey, I’m one of them too), but let’s cut him some slack.

He created Star Wars for crying out loud!

Chewy, Han, Leia, Luke, Vader, frickin’ Yoda … each one is a household name and captured the imaginations of many an American youth, myself included.

Lucas’ amazing characters no doubt nurtured the creativity of J.J. Abrams as well, who has successfully bridged the Star Wars franchise into a new generation with The Force Awakens.

The film is grounded in a delightfully simple premise: Where in the universe is Luke Skywalker? Many years have passed since Return of the Jedi, and though the Empire is no more, the Dark Side of the Force has licked its wounds and is on the rise once again, this time under the guise of The First Order. Resistance forces led by General Leia Organa (yes, formerly Princess Leia, played by the incomparable Carrie Fisher) are all that stand in The First Order’s way of toppling the Republic.

Luke, the last known Jedi, has disappeared for mysterious reasons, and both sides are furiously trying to find him to no avail. However, clues to his whereabouts surface on an otherwise inconsequential desert planet of Jakku.

A map to Luke’s location has been entrusted to a ridiculously adorable droid

10

Issue 203 • December 21, 2015 – January 4, 2016

Words James Barone

(BB-8), who happens upon a scruffybut-gorgeous scavenger (Rey, played by newcomer Daisy Ridley) with a fragmented past, spawning an actionpacked space caper of epic proportions.

Sound familiar? That’s because it is. The parallels between The Force Awakens and Episode IV: A New Hope are pretty plain to see. Abrams and his screenwriting partners Lawrence Kasdan and Michael Arndt seemed to be content with sticking to what worked, and the good news for them is it still does. Seeing Han Solo (Harrison Ford) and Chewbacca (Peter Mayhew) reunited after all these years on the big screen was a huge treat; a visit to an alien bar, loaded with colorful characters, hearkened to that famous scene in the Mos Eisley cantina; watching the

Millennium Falcon soar at warp speed and take on TIE Fighters, even though it looks like nothing more than an interstellar hooptie, still leaves me with the feeling that anything is possible.

But it’s the new parts that made The Force Awakens such a joy to watch.

Ridley’s Rey is a heroine who’s easy to root for, a perfect mix of vulnerability, humor and bad-assery. She’s well-suited to create a new icon for a new generation of fans. Joining her is another relative unknown, John Boyega, who takes us beneath the helmet of a Stormtrooper as Finn. Taken from his family as a youth, Finn was stripped of any identity, and cloaked in the iconic white armor of The First Order, but he never lost his humanity. After witnessing his army commit a horrible atrocity on Jakku, Finn helps Resistance pilot Poe Dameron (Oscar Isaac) escape from The First Order’s clutches. Boyega is hilarious at times in his role as a burgeoning, lovestruck young hero who’s in a bit over his head.

No Star Wars movie would be complete without a strong villain, and The Force Awakens is no exception. Adam Driver dons the dark cloak and mask of Kylo Ren, a wielder of The Force who has been seduced by the Dark Side. Driver’s voice is almost devoid of emotion as Ren; however, his expression and demeanor creates a character easy to sympathize with. During an epic showdown against Rey in the snow, the two actors create a struggle that not only feels like a broad battle of good versus evil, but something much more intimate and personal.

Abrams and company thankfully didn’t decide to make a darker or grittier relaunch of the Star Wars franchise. The Force Awakens is something you can take your kids to, that both young and old will enjoy. It follows the the blueprint Lucas laid out in the original trilogy, and maybe even improves upon it. Still, none of this would’ve been possible without the man himself, so thanks, George, for everything.

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Issue 203 • December 21, 2015 – January 4, 2016

11

ROTATING TAPS HOUSE COCKTAILS SEASONAL MENUS & GOOD TIMES!

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Happy HOur mOn - fri 4 tO 7 pm 12

Issue 203 • December 21, 2015 – January 4, 2016

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Dive Into Sacramento & Its Surrounding Areas

8

Your Senses

10

Words Jonathan Carabba

1 15

3

5

HEAR

It’s time to say goodbye to 2015. From rock concerts, to dance parties, to comedy shows and everything in between, here is your ultimate guide to Sacramento-area New Year’s Eve parties! Have fun, be safe and please don’t drink and drive.

1

4

If you’re looking for a funky dance party head to T orch C lub and party with two fantastic local bands: IdeaTeam (featuring Aquifer) and Black Star Safari. Cover charge is $25, 9 p.m., 21-plus. Torchclub.net for more info.

Groove to late ‘80s and early ‘90s hip-hop, hip-house, and R&B at “New Jack Fling” at P ress C lub , brought to you by DJs Crook (featured on this issue’s cover!), BenJohnson and Satapana. $7 cover, 21-plus, 9 p.m.

2

5

3 Sing along to your favorite hard rock hits with Radio Heavy at our favorite downtown Roseville watering hole, B ar 101 . This party is free and 21-and-over, with a 9:30 p.m. start time.

Bar101roseville.com for more info.

SubmergeMag.com

9

16

7

16 Parties to Usher In 2016!

Enjoy a soft rock explosion at H arlow ’ s with Mustache Harbor. Tickets are $30 in advance, doors open at 9 p.m., 21plus. Hit up Harlows.com for a link to buy tickets.

14

Ace of S pades

wants to party hard with you on NYE when they host legendary heavy metal band Y&T, with opening sets by locals Skin of Saints, ONOFF and Roswell. Tickets are $35 in advance, available at Aceofspadessac.com. 7 p.m. doors.

This show is all-ages!

6 The newest dive bar on the grid B -S ide invites you to check out their digs and get down to sounds

by DJ Whores and friends.

No cover, 21-plus. Search for “B-Side” on Facebook for more info.

10

We here at Submerge are teaming up with the Lipstick crew for an epic NYE dance party at O ld I ronsides featuring live music from local dreamy/synth-y pop group The Good Fortune, as well as DJ sets by Shaun

Slaughter, Roger Carpio

and Adam Jay. 9 p.m., 21-plus. $8 advance tickets available at Cuffs.

8 Laugh away the new year at P unchline S acramento during “2015’s Last Laughs” featuring sets

by Ngaio Bealum, Keith Lowell Jensen and many other local faves. Two shows: 7:30 p.m. ($20) and 10 p.m. ($25). 18-andover. Punchlinesac.com for more info.

C enter for the A rts’ “Laughs, Lolo and Legs” party featuring comedy from Katie Rubin, neo vintage jazz pop music of Lolo Gervais, burlesque from the Bow-Tie Beauties, DJ dance party hosted

by Jamal Walker and more!

8 p.m. doors, tickets start at $22.

Hit up Thecenterforthearts.org for advanced tickets.

11 For a family-friendly daytime celebration that everyone can stay awake for, head to C rocker A rt M useum ’ s “Noon Year’s Eve” event, which is free for all ages and runs from 10 a.m.–5 p.m.

Performances from Germar the

Magician, Ebo Okokan, Ohana Dance Group and

many more.

9 B lackbird

Visit historic Grass Valley for

recently reopened and they’re throwing a party this NYE co-presented by Rue 27, THIS Midtown and 1810 Gallery featuring live tunes by nudisco act Figgy, and a DJ set from Sacto faves Sister Crayon. 7:30 p.m., $40 per person, $75 for VIP upgrade. Studio53.eventbrite.com for more.

12 Enjoy some amazing homegrown talent at C rest T heatre when Jackie Greene and his band perform a special NYE concert! Doors open at 8:30 p.m. and tickets start at $35 in advance.

14 Groove to some soul, funk, disco, reggae, latin and more from a few of Sacto’s best selectors at Fox & G oose . DJs Larry Rodriguez, MC Ham and Wokstar will be spinning all night! $10 cover, 21-and-up, 9 p.m.

15 Bundle up and head up the hill for three days of SnowGlobe (Dec. 29–31) in S outh L ake Tahoe featuring headliners like Jack Ü (aka Skrillex and Diplo), Kaskade,

Dillon Francis, Run the Jewels, E-40 and many

more. All-ages event. Check out Snowglobemusicfestival.com for details.

16 NOW 100.5 FM and MIX 96 are throwing a masquerade party for the ages at the H yatt

R egency S acramento featuring cover band and headliner

Apple Z, plus DJ Rated R, Quinn Hedges and Ryan Hernandez. $75 in advance for general admission, 9 p.m. start time, 21-plus.

13 The kind folks over at B lue L amp are throwing a free NYE bash featuring great music, plenty of booze, good company and a champagne toast at midnight. 9 p.m. start time, 21plus, no cover.

Issue 203 • December 21, 2015 – January 4, 2016

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Issue 203 • December 21, 2015 – January 4, 2016

1/8

PAGE

Dive Into Sacramento & Its Surrounding Areas

Words Eddie Jorgensen

Your Senses

TOUCH

Get Three Dance Lessons for $1 at The Ballroom of Sacramento’s Dollar Daze Dance Camp! • Jan. 3 Have four quarters burning a hole in your pocket? For those who have two left feet or abysmal dance skills, the cost of these classes can’t be beat. The folks at the The Ballroom of Sacramento will be opening their doors to the public to teach partner dancing. The first class starts at 1 p.m. and focuses on the highly interpretive Latin American dance known as merengue. And while the 2/4 signature rhythms are fast-paced and usually tricky, teacher Andy K. will break everything down step by step. Also on the menu is a beginning waltz course taught by Mark Vangere whose steps will impress your wannabe high-brow friends. Lastly, there is an East Coast Swing class led by Johnny Ochoa for all you hipsters stuck in another time period. Each lesson is 45 minutes in length plus an added 15 minutes to practice what you learned. Anyone 12 and older is encouraged to join this not-so-lazy Sunday soiree, so dress appropriately and bring your most comfortable shoes. After the class is over, you’ll never have to go to a wedding and sit idle for fear of embarrassment on the dance floor.

Check out this and other upcoming events at Facebook.com/theballroomofsacramento.

SEE

Hundreds of Adoptable Animals Are Only $25 During “Home for the Holidays” at the Bradshaw Shelter It’s no great secret there are more animals in shelters and walking the streets of the Sacramento Valley than our residents know what to do with. Those looking for a new companion should always consider a shelter as their first option for finding that special cat or dog. The kind staff of Sacramento County Animal Care encourage all to come take advantage of their limited $25 adoption special which continues through the end of December. All of their in-house adoptions include a spay/neuter surgery, necessary vaccinations, microchips and even a license for a year. Make sure you have time and patience before considering taking in a first (or second) pet, as these furry friends all require a fair amount of love, attention and affection. You also must be 18 or older to adopt. Spread the word, whether you are in need of a pet or not and, most importantly, help the local Bradshaw Shelter bring the number of cats and dogs housed there back down to a more comfortable level. Call (916) 368-7387 for more info.

TASTE

Eat What You Roll at Sac Food Co-op’s “Sensational Sushi” Class • Jan. 12

Tired of buying crappy sushi at your local supermarket? Can’t afford to dine out every night? Have a sushi addiction that you just can’t kick?

Even if you’re just looking for bragging rights for your next Facebook status update, the “Sensational Sushi” class will cover all the bases.

Depending on how quickly you can pick up sushi-making, this upcoming class could be a very cost prohibitive exercise for the Sac Food Co-op.

For only $49, one will learn the fine art of preparing sushi using a variety of common and not-so-common ingredients. This class will be led by instructor Dionisio Esperas and all the different pieces you need to make some tasty fare will be at your disposal. Learn how to make nigiri, hand rolls and maki sushi rolls with no pressure from your peers. Additionally, everyone will make a seasonal veggie roll, a spicy California roll with avocado and a smoked-salmon hand roll with pickled red onions. They’re allowing you to eat everything you roll so pay attention in this short class and leave your cell phone in your car. Make sure you enroll in advance as limited space is available. For sign-up details visit Sacfoodcoop.com.

SubmergeMag.com

Issue 203 • December 21, 2015 – January 4, 2016

15

1417 R STREET SACRAMENTO

DRew BalDRiDGe

F R i DAy

January 29 oM3n • RiChaRD the RoCkStaR

F R i DAy

newyears eve!

February 12

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December 31

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with SpeCial GueSt

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January 10

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January 16

w E D N E S DAy

MotoRize

February 13

February 3

MetRo Station

w E D N E S DAy

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January 13

SAT u R DAy

January 23

Issue 203 • December 21, 2015 – January 4, 2016

F R i DAy

February 5

M O N DAy

February 15

Dive Into Sacramento & Its Surrounding Areas

Ciara SAT u R DAy heRMituDe • Ganz

w E D N E S DAy

February 17

March 5

T h u R S DAy

March 31

like paCifiC • knuCkle puCk

M O N DAy

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oCD: MooSh & twiSt futuRiStiC

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All Shows All Ages ButCheR BaBieS • ne oBliviSCaRiS

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March 1

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TiCkETS AvAilAblE @ DiMplE RECORDS, ARMADillO, AceOfSpadesSac.com by phone: 916.443.9202

Issue 203 • December 21, 2015 – January 4, 2016

17

The Ramen King

Ryujin and Raijin Ramen House Owner Sai Wong Words Ronnie Cline • photos evan e. duran & ronnie cline

L

ately nothing sounds better to me on a cold winter day than walking over to a local ramen house and refueling by way of slurpable noodles in a piping hot, deeply flavored broth. For a while, Sacramento had very few places to satisfy this craving; now the demand is growing and highquality ramen is not so hard to find. One man responsible for bringing high-quality ramen to Sacramento is Sai Wong. Mr. Wong is a restaurateur who lives and breathes ramen, so it made sense for him to open not just one, but two ramen houses in the area. What caught my eye, however, was the fact that they are located right across the street from each other.

I popped into one of the ramen houses to try to set up an interview with Mr. Wong; I thought I would ask someone for a card or a phone number. Knowing he’s a local restaurateur (Akebono, Ryujin Ramen House, Raijin Ramen House), I assumed he was very busy—being a restaurateur and whatnot—and might be hard to track down. Upon entering the bustling Raijin Ramen House I asked the friendly woman behind the counter for Mr. Wong’s contact information; instead of handing me a card or giving me an email address, to my surprise she turned around and said something to the chef who then came over and introduced himself.

“Hi, I’m Sai Wong,” he said. “How can I help you?”

18

Issue 203 • December 21, 2015 – January 4, 2016

I was surprised to see you behind the counter cooking. Do you work at all of your restaurants?

Yeah, right now I’m working here, but I worked at Ryujin too. It has been open for three years already so they have a good system, but I make sure to go over there and taste every day.

I have to make sure it’s good, make sure it’s right.

When you’re hiring someone to cook your recipes what kind of person do you look for?

They have to like cooking and eating ramen. A lot of people come looking for a job, but just for the salary. They have to love the food. If they don’t love it, then they are out.

Can you tell me about your childhood?

Where did you grow up?

I was born in Laos, then at 17 or 18 I went to Japan. I lived in Tokyo for about 15 years. When I was there, during my first week somebody took me to

eat ramen. At first it was funny to me because when you order ramen on the street they just give you a bowl. No spoon, no chopstick, no table, no chair.

[Laughs] For me it was the first time just holding the bowl and I thought, “I cannot eat like this” [laughs]. But that’s how they do it.

And after having your first bowl of ramen …

It was cold when I got there so eating a bowl of hot ramen made me feel good. From that time on I kept eating ramen. During my time there I ate a lot of ramen, over 400 bowls a year. I love ramen. People in Japan thought I was crazy for eating ramen every day.

I can tell you are very passionate about ramen.

I opened Edokko, my first ramen shop, in Japan in 1985 and I’m still learning about ramen every day! There are always new kinds of ramen in Japan.

I have ramen contacts there that tell

Dive Into Sacramento & Its Surrounding Areas

me about new ramen and send me photos.

Every day I look at new photos of ramen and ask questions about the flavors and what’s in it. Then I go to Japan and try it. I have to study all of the time.

[While telling me this he eagerly pulled out his iPhone and showed me the different people he follows on Facebook who post photos of ramen] So what brought you to America?

My parents moved here a long time ago.

When I moved to Japan, they came here.

They kept asking me to come here so I came.

And when you came here did you open a ramen house?

I opened a ramen house in 1993 here in Sacramento on Broadway and called it Edokko like in Japan, then I moved it to Greenhaven, then back to Broadway, but at that time not too many people ate ramen. They thought it was Top Ramen or something, but now people know a lot about ramen.

Before this location was Raijin Ramen House it was an Izakaya. What made you decide to move away from the Izakaya

style restaurant and open a second ramen house?

I love Izakaya. San Francisco, New York they have many Izakayas but in Sacramento we didn’t have one so I tried to introduce everybody to the Izakaya. It became a problem because a lot of people drank too much and got into trouble, bothered other customers. They even went outside to fight.

What are some of the differences between the menus at Ryujin and Raijin?

Here at Raijin we have more spicy stuff, more new stuff. The basic broth is almost the same. Our main broth is a pork broth.

Some customers asked if we can make a chicken broth, so we made one at Ryujin.

If our customers want everything chicken, we’ll make it for them over there.

Were you hesitant about opening up a new ramen house right across the street from Ryujin?

Yeah a little, but I thought the first one is very busy and a lot of customers can’t get in; if I open one more it will be better for the customers. They can come here, try this ramen and choose which one they like.

I noticed a difference in your noodles as well.

Yeah, some are different and some are the same. Here at Raijin I have two kinds of noodles. Over at Ryujin I have one kind. The basic noodle is thinner, but for the spicy ramen here I use a thicker noodle.

I noticed you have many types of ramen on both menus. How do you come up with your recipes?

I have to go eat a lot of ramen. I go to Japan every year, twice a year to eat ramen. I go to four or five ramen houses a day looking for new ramen, new ideas.

Right now they have a lot of spicy ramen so I brought that to Raijin. I make the ramen, taste it, make it, taste it, make it, taste it. Then I decide if it’s good enough.

A recipe can take 3–6 months.

After trying so many styles of ramen do you have a favorite?

It would probably be a soy sauce-flavored ramen, a shoyu ramen. The first ramen I ate was a shoyu ramen and I’ve kept it in my mind my whole life [laughs].

So what’s next for you? Do you think you will open another ramen shop?

Well let me just say if I open one more ramen shop it’s going to be different.

Completely different.

“I go to Japan every year, twice a year to eat ramen. I go to four or five ramen houses a day looking for new ramen, new ideas. Right now they have a lot of spicy ramen so I brought that to Raijin. I make the ramen, taste it, make it, taste it, make it, taste it. Then I decide if it’s good enough. A recipe can take 3–6 months.”

– Sai Wong on creating the menus at his ramen houses.

SubmergeMag.com

T Besr a B iLLe v e ros

2s0T1r5iBune s - Pre

in

free Live Music

fri/saT 9:30PM - cLose, 21+

Dec 26 Denver j Dec 31 nye with raDio heavy jan 2 scoTTy vox jan 8 sPare ParTs jan 9 DanieL PeTTy jan 15 skiPPy & The BoWL junkies jan 16 The hiLL in MinD jan 22 Brian rogers jan 23 Denver j ***cLoseD*** Dec 25 & jan 1 Trivia MonDays oPen Mic WeDnesDays 6:30PM

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7 Days a Week Ryujin Ramen House is located at 1831 S Street. Raijin Ramen House is located just across the street at 1901 Street. Find hours, menu, and more for both online at Ryujinramen.com and Ramenhouseraijin.com.

Issue 203 • December 21, 2015 – January 4, 2016

101 Main Street

roSeville 916-774-0505

Facebook.coM/bar101roSeville

19

Keep on Spinning

DJ Crook prepares to ring in the New Year at the Press Club and hints at the future of Team Sleep Words Alia Cruz • photos kevin fiscus

J

ohn “DJ Crook” Molina, aka CrookOne, has been a staple Sacramento DJ for nearly 15 years. The Los Angeles native came to Sac in the mid-’90s, and we have claimed him as our own ever since. “My first official gig was at the Monkey Bar in 2002. That kind of got the ball rolling for me. Years later, and I’ve DJed at most places that will allow it in this town,” says Crook.

DJ Crook has been known to bring his funky music palette to countless party epicenters in our area. You may have experienced his work at the Golden Bear, where he has held a residency for more than a decade every Friday night and Second Saturday, or for his randomly occurring (soon-to-be-resurrected) FFFreak dance party at The Press Club to name just a few.

He is also one of those DJs who can seamlessly go from a latenight bar/dance party setting to providing backing sets for full rock bands. When he wasn’t manning turntables at nightclubs and

bars, he was working with bands like Team Sleep, Decibel Devils and Deftones, where he would intertwine his work with the likes of Chino Moreno and Zach Hill.

As a new year approaches, Crook has a whole fleet of projects on hand to fill it. He met with me for a beer to discuss the current state of his DJing endeavors, and to prove that he’s not slowing down as the years pass. Not only is his band, Team Sleep, working on new material, but his weekly DJ nights are expanding to include at least one regular slot at the new B-Side vinyl bar. His work at B-Side will be experimental at first, and as Crook told me, “a lot of different crowds have come and gone … What I was playing back then is a little different from now, but I also have to adjust to mixing the old with the new. It’s all a matter of keeping up with it all. I am grateful to be doing this.”

How did you get yourself into DJing?

I’m gonna age myself now … It started way back in the ‘80s when I was in high school and trying to do the whole break/graffiti thing. I would listen to this radio station in L.A. called KDAY, and they had live DJ mix shows. It was probably around 1985 … and I thought it was pretty interesting and something I would love to do. I would just listen to the different guys DJing and study their techniques.

Then, I moved from L.A. to Whittier and met some guys who were DJs there. I hung around them and from there, got my own turntables. I was about 15 or 16 at the time. We were all just a bunch of kids, but they were all so good at what they did. I would watch them and then go home and sit in my room and create my own stuff.

What sort of records captivated you at that time?

At that time, I would say the Planet Rocks, Egyptian Lover, Run DMC and stuff like that.

Early hip-hop and mid-’80s electro were my thing. At the time, I still didn’t even have a job, or was barely in the process of getting one, so I didn’t have any records. I would go into my dad’s or stepmom’s records and try to mix anything I could get my hands on; I would take something like a Madonna and mix it with something of my own.

How did you end up in Sacramento?

My friend, Frank Delgado, and a couple of other friends of mine, moved down here. Frank got a DJing gig and actually ended up meeting the guys from Deftones and eventually joined the band as a DJ. He would always tell me to come up, so I found myself visiting really frequently … pretty much just going home to work. The year 2000 is when I decided to make the move to Sac. I saw that I had opportunities here.

You eventually worked with Deftones when you moved to Sac. Tell me how that relationship blossomed.

It was 1996 when I first met those guys, and they were beginning to get really big at that time because their first record was just getting ready to come out. So the singer [Chino Moreno] played me the record and I played him a hip-hop demo tape, and he listened to the whole thing. Back then, it was cassettes.

When I moved up here, they had put out their third record. My friend Frank Delgado really connected me with those guys, and I’ve collaborated on a couple of songs and projects ever since. Chino and I are both in the band Team Sleep.

20

Issue 203 • December 21, 2015 – January 4, 2016

Dive Into Sacramento & Its Surrounding Areas

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SEEING RED

“I would go into my dad’s or stepmom’s records and try to mix anything I could get my hands on; I would take something like a Madonna and mix it with something of my own.”

– DJ Crook Is Team Sleep alive and well?

We did a show last October in Woodstock, New York, and that record came out in July. We are working on the DVD part of the performance now.

Currently, we are working on new material. Zach Hill has been super busy with Death Grips, so he hasn’t been involved this time around, but I’ll text him every now and then (mostly when I’ve been drinking), to talk about projects and catch up. He’s always working on a bunch of different things. We have Gil Sharone working with us on drums right now. He came with us to Woodstock last year, which wasn’t supposed to initially happen, but I am happy it did. He was originally scheduled to go on tour with Marilyn Manson at that time, but that somehow got delayed so he ended up with us. We are definitely working on some new things and will be chipping away at a new album for the coming year with a few shows in the works too.

How did you become connected with B-Side?

I know the owners. I’ve known Jason Boggs and Garrett Van Vleck for years, and actually Garrett used to be the door guy at Monkey Bar many years ago when I was a DJ there. Jason kind of told me what his vision for that bar was, and it was really exciting. I was just waiting and waiting for it to open, I was really anxious to just get in there.

It is really great. It’s so new, and I have only had a couple of nights there, but the environment and the way it looks is awesome. It has this old school ‘70s feel. They did such a good job with the interior. When I had my night there, we did the all-vinyl thing, and there was good energy and a good turnout. Me and a couple of guys are going to try different themed nights and see what really sticks.

SubmergeMag.com

veteran, Senior, activiSt, a.d.a. patient diScountS

NEW PAINTINGS BY

JOHN HORTON

What are your nights there like?

Thursday I am going to be DJing with my friend Ben [Johnson], of Delta Breeze Records in West Sac. We are focusing on modern funk. Also, on the first Saturday of every month, when he isn’t busy touring with Deftones, Frank Delgado and I will be trying to collaborate. Years back, Frank and I actually had a night at Monkey Bar we would put on called “Heavy Duty,” and we are looking to revive that concept; it has a really open format.

What sort of things are you looking forward to in 2016?

I am hosting a New Year’s Eve party at Press Club called “New Jack Fling.” I usually host it a few times a year. It’s more of a late ‘80s/early ‘90s new jack swing dance party, kinda like Tony! Toni!

Toné! Also, same-era hip-hop and R&B will be included. It’s always such a fun night.

I will also be continuing to do my night at the Golden Bear. January will mark my 10-year anniversary of DJing there. Sometimes I forget how long I’ve been doing this.

FIRST FRIDAY JANUARY 1ST

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Don your favorite pair of stonewashed jeans and swing down to The Press Club to see DJ Crook and others spin late ‘80s and early ‘90s hip-hop and R&B at their New Year’s Eve celebration, New Jack Fling, on Dec. 31 (duh). The party starts at 9 p.m. and the cover is just $7. Decade-appropriate attire is not mandatory, but it is encouraged. The Press Club is located at 2030 P Street in Sacramento.

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Issue 203 • December 21, 2015 – January 4, 2016

MEntion “SubMErgE”

11AM-10PM 7 DAYS A WEEK

21

Sonic High

Keeping it dreamy with The Good Fortune Words Lovelle Harris

W

hat do you do when you are raised on classical music, majored in music in college and played the flute in high school? Start an electronic dream pop band, of course.

That’s exactly what Jeremiah Tsering did when he and four friends—Mark Johnston on guitar, Phillip Moskalets on bass, Dave Moskalets on keyboards and Mark Tuzman on drums—launched The Good Fortune last summer.

“I’ve always had an urge to write, since high school, which was not that long ago.

I started playing guitar first then my goal switched over to writing because I kept having all of these sounds playing in my head (I sound like a crazy person), but eventually I was around some people who inspired me to just start recording,” Tsering says.

This urge eventually metamorphosed into a full-on musical effort when Tsering and Johnston were approached by a friend to fill a last-minute slot at a show at Lounge of Life.

The fortuitous event would prove to be the catalyst from which The Good Fortune would emerge.

“It was kind of an accident, we had a friend who asked us to play just this one-off [show] , and we did a bunch of cover songs and a couple of originals, and it went really well,” Johnston says. “The band meshed really well, and [we] just decided to roll with it because we got a really good reaction and then we accidentally became a band, and it’s been fun.”

While each individual member of the band wasn’t new to the music scene (all five have played in other musical projects and bands), they admit that throwing together a quick set list and forming a band on the fly was a challenge, but one which they fully embraced.

“It was the most bizarre, euphoric thing, Johnson continues. “We walked on stage having no idea what was going to happen and thinking ‘Let’s hope they like the cover songs.’

And people were dancing, people really got into it and we walked off stage and into the green room and we just looked at each other like, ‘That really just happened. OK let’s do another one of these.’ We thought it was going to be a one-off but it was the best. There’s an intangible to getting off stage and going ‘People who I’ve never met in my entire life

22

Issue 203 • December 21, 2015 – January 4, 2016

just liked what I did.’”

The accidental band then forged on, playing shows at small venues and cultivating and honing their lush, dreamy sound. Soon the fivesome were being invited to play at larger gigs, culminating with a performance at this summer’s THIS Midtown block party, a stint at Sam Sascha Keshavarz’s Le Twist Tuesdays dance party and a slot on the bill at the Submerge Presents Lipstick! New Year’s Eve party at Old Ironsides. But all of the attention hasn’t distracted the band from their mission to bring a soulful and thoughtful voice to the local music scene.

“I always had this dream of playing in a band and bringing a team with me and not doing something super selfish—there’s a lot of people out there who write and say ‘It’s all about me,’ so I think it’s really cool when you can do something and involve other people and they can find their role and everyone kind of grows with you, and that’s what it’s been like so far,” Tsering says.

The longtime friends cite their diverse musical backgrounds and interests as the spark that ignites their collective passion for bringing their distinct vision of music to life—a vision that strives to balance professionalism with a collaborative spirit where all of the players are empowered to have fun and enjoy themselves.

“We all respect each other as musicians,” Johnston says. “Our bass player Phil has surreal amounts of talent. He’s incredible.

One of the other guys in the band, Dave, he was in Nashville like two years ago writing country music. Jeremiah grew up listening to a bunch of progressive, indie rock bands, and I grew up listening to metal and hardcore. But all of those influences … and all of us really respecting each other’s musical backgrounds, and really liking the central vision for what we do, makes it such a fun experience.”

The band’s first EP, Social Crowns, was recorded in Tsering’s home studio and was comprised of a collection of songs that the singer-songwriter had been amassing since his senior year in high school. The experience of writing and recording was a therapeutic experience for the singer, who admits that the process helped him get through a bout of depression and that the music is more than just catchy verses and tunes.

Dive Into Sacramento & Its Surrounding Areas

“When music really affects me it bypasses all of the senses and goes straight to the soul and emotions, and it’s almost like a high, it’s crazy.”

–The Good Fortune’s Jeremiah Tsering

SubmergeMag.com

“A lot of those songs I started writing even before we got that first show—probably like a year in advance, in total,” Tsering says.

“I’ve been writing pretty consistently since senior year of high school. When music really affects me it bypasses all of the senses and goes straight to the soul and emotions, and it’s almost like a high, it’s crazy. My goal is to have real-life messages that we talk about, that make people think about the lyrics, not like, ‘Oh, this is a catchy tune or this is a catchy verse.’ I want people to think about it a little deeper and maybe understand the meaning of the song or question what it’s about.”

And that is what is at the core of TGF’s musical philosophy—a longing to encourage an honest and thoughtful dialogue about everyday life that isn’t pretentious or isolating that celebrates Sacramento.

“I actually ranted about this the other day on Instagram,” Tsering says. “I see Sacramento as we’re laying a foundation for something, and I feel like a lot of other cities and the world has kind of looked at Sacramento as a second-class city, and I like that. I’ve always felt like the underdog, I’ve always felt like I didn’t really have everything but if I was diligent enough I can go ahead and get to the place I need to be, so that’s where I see Sacramento. Especially with festivals like TBD and how that’s growing, and I see the growth of these things and I just want to be part of it and contribute as much as we can to show people that Sacramento isn’t some random city that you just pass through; we have culture, we have a lot of great things.”

The bandmates’ love for music and the magic that a live performance can conjure is also at the center of what they want to

bring to the vital Sacramento music scene.

As the band looks to the new year, they’re encouraging themselves to continue to push forward. They’re currently working on news songs and hope to release their first full-length effort next year while also embracing the DIY ethos that is at the heart of the new music business by looking to create a series of music videos on YouTube. Oh, and if we’re lucky we might even see Tsering bust out the flute during a future performance.

See The Good Fortune live at Old Ironsides as part of the Lipstick New Year’s Eve party, presented

by Submerge. DJs Shaun Slaughter, Adam Jay and Roger Carpio will also be on hand. Admission is just $10 and the party starts at 9 p.m.

Go to Theoldironsides.com for more information.

Issue 203 • December 21, 2015 – January 4, 2016

23

12.26

904 15th Street 443.2797

Between I & J • Downtown Sacramento

torchclub.net

Saturday

music, comedy & misc. Calendar

dec 22 - jan 3 TUeS

Hans EbErbacH 5:30Pm

Wed

acoustic oPEn mic 5:30Pm

22 23

THURS

micHaEl ray 8Pm Hot city Jazz 9Pm

FRI

24+ 25

SaT

closEd for cHristmas EvE and cHristmas dElta city ramblErs 5:30Pm

SUn

bluEs Jam 4Pm

26

mind X 9Pm

27

front tHE band 9Pm

TUeS

laurEn WakEfiEld 3-8Pm

Wed

sandra dolorEs 5:30Pm

29 30

micHaEl ray 9Pm PEtEr PEtty band 8Pm

nEW yEar’s THURS EvE! 31

FRI

1

idEa tEam black star safari PailEr & fratis 5:30Pm

tba 9Pm

dec. 21 – jan. 4 submergemag.com/calendar

12.21 Monday

The Boxing Donkey Open Mic Variety Night, 8 p.m.

Distillery Karaoke, 9 p.m.

Fox & Goose Open Mic Night, 7:30 p.m.

Goldfield Open Mic Night hosted by James Cavern, 9 p.m.

Louie’s Cocktail Lounge Karaoke, 9 p.m.

LowBrau Motown on Monday’s w/ DJ Epik, 9 p.m.

Luna’s Cafe Nebraska Mondays hosted by Ross Hammond, 7:30 p.m.

Shady Lady Snowfall! w/ DJ Shaun Slaughter and Guests, 8 p.m.

12.22 Tuesday

The Blue Lamp Marlon, 9 p.m.

Distillery Karaoke, 9 p.m.

Dive Bar Dueling Pianos, 9 p.m.

Kupros Craft House Open Mic, 8 p.m.

LowBrau Le Twist Tuesdays Holiday Party w/ !!! (DJ Set), Sam I Jam, Adam J, Roger Carpio, 9 p.m.

Old Ironsides Karaoke, 9 p.m.

Pine Cove Open Mic Night, 9 p.m.

Powerhouse Pub Live Band Karaoke, 8 p.m.

Torch Club Hans Eberbach, 5:30 p.m.; Michael Ray, 8 p.m.

12.23 Wednesday

Bar 101 Open Mic, 7:30 p.m.

The Blue Lamp A Really Awesome Show w/ Emory Hayes and more, 8 p.m.

Club Car The Double Shots, 7:30 p.m.

Distillery Karaoke, 9 p.m.

Dive Bar Open Mic, 8 p.m.

El Dorado Saloon DJ River, 9 p.m.

Fox & Goose All Vinyl Wednesdays w/ DJ AA Knuff, 8 p.m.

G Street WunderBar DJ Larry Rodriguez, 10 p.m.

Goldfield Janmondo, 9 p.m.

Harlow’s Hepcat Holiday w/ Peter Petty and the Midtown Moxies, 5:30 p.m.

Laughs Unlimited Karaoke, 8 p.m.

Mix DJ Gabe Xavier, DJ Peeti V, 9 p.m.

Nicholson’s MusiCafe Acoustic Open Mic, 6 p.m.

Old Ironsides Open Mic, 9 p.m.

Powerhouse Pub Local Licks Free Music Series w/ Element of Soul, The Good Samaritans, 8 p.m.

Press Club Youth Cult: New Wave Dance Party, 9 p.m.

Starlite Lounge Gaylord Kingdom, 8 p.m.

Torch Club Acoustic Open Mic, 5:30 p.m.; Hot City Jazz, 9 p.m.

12.24 thursday

Club Car Songwriters Showcase, 8 p.m.

The Coffee Garden Open Mic Night, 8 p.m.

Luna’s Cafe Christmas Eve Special w/ Kevin Seconds, Allyson Seconds, David Houston, Jonah Matranga and Friends, 8 p.m.

12.25 Friday

Harlow’s Union, James Cavern, 8 p.m.

Red Hawk Casino Big Trouble, 4 p.m.; Thunder Cover, 9:30 p.m.

Thunder Valley Casino Resort Shadia, 9:30 p.m.

Bar 101 Denver J, 9:30 p.m.

Cache Creek Casino Ambrosia, 8 p.m.

Capitol Garage Feel Good Saturday’s w/ DJ Epik, 10 p.m.

District 30 Benji the Hunger, 9 p.m.

El Dorado Saloon Island of Black and White, 9 p.m.

Fox & Goose Adam Block, Chowder Heart & Friends, The Wandering Souls, 9 p.m.

Goldfield Country DJ Dancing, 9 p.m.

Harlow’s Big Eyed Fish (Dave Matthews Band tribute), The Tipsy Hustlers, 8 p.m.

KBAR Z Rokk, 9 p.m.

Kupros Craft House Harley White Jr. Trio, 9:30 p.m.

Mix DJ Eddie Edul, 9 p.m.

Nicholson’s MusiCafe Free Ukulele Class, 1 p.m.

Old Ironsides Twilight Drifters, Keri Carr, Peter Petty, KB and the Slingtones, DJ Dereck, 9 p.m.

Pine Cove Karaoke, 9 p.m.

Powerhouse Pub Wonder Bread 5, 9:30 p.m.

Press Club DJ Larry Rodriguez, 9 p.m.

Red Hawk Casino The Wiz Kid, 10 p.m.

Shine Fulkerson & Clarke, Nikki Nelson, 8 p.m.

Thunder Valley Casino Resort Maxx Cabello Jr., 9:30 p.m.

Torch Club Delta City Ramblers, 5:30 p.m.; Mind X, 9 p.m.

PomEgranatE 5:30Pm

SaT

2

SUn

3

TUeS

5

24

WHooPiE Qat 9Pm bluEs Jam 4Pm

front tHE band 8Pm tba 4Pm

micHaEl ray

8Pm

12.24 12.25 Christmas Eve Special w/

Kevin Seconds Allyson Seconds, David Houston, Jonah Matranga and Friends Luna's Cafe 8 p.m.

Issue 203 • December 21, 2015 – January 4, 2016

Thunder Cover Red Hawk Casino 9:30 p.m.

Dive Into Sacramento & Its Surrounding Areas

12.27 sunday

Berryessa Brewing Co. Hot City, 3 p.m.

The Blue Lamp Punk Rock Coat Drive w/ The Moans, The Rollin’ Blackouts, Kill the Cute, Slutzville, 8 p.m.

Broderick Roadhouse Karaoke w/ DJ Jazcat, 9 p.m.

Cache Creek Casino Film Rattapoom, 6 p.m.

Capitol Garage Karaoke w/ Jeff Jenkins, 9 p.m.

Distillery Karaoke, 8 p.m.

District 30 Mix DJ Gabe Xavier, 8:30 p.m.

Powerhouse Pub Dippin’ Sauce, 3 p.m.

Press Club Sunday Night Soul Party w/ DJ Larry Rodriguez, 9 p.m.

Red Hawk Casino BB McKay & the Bumps, 7 p.m.

Starlite Lounge Squidz, Crude Studs, Blhans, 7 p.m.

Torch Club Blues Jam, 4 p.m.; Front the Band, 9 p.m.

12.28 monday

The Boxing Donkey Open Mic Variety Night, 8 p.m.

Distillery Karaoke, 9 p.m.

Fox & Goose Open Mic Night, 7:30 p.m.

Goldfield Open Mic Night hosted by James Cavern, 9 p.m.

Louie’s Cocktail Lounge Karaoke, 9 p.m.

LowBrau Motown on Monday’s w/ DJ Epik, 9 p.m.

Luna’s Cafe Michael Ray, Byron Colborn Quartet, 7:30 p.m.

Press Club Papa’s Culture, The Storytellers, DJ Larry Rodriguez, 7:30 p.m.

Red Hawk Casino Poparazzi, 8 p.m.

12.29 Tuesday

The Blue Lamp DubbLyfe, 8 p.m.

Distillery Karaoke, 9 p.m.

Kupros Craft House Open Mic, 8 p.m.

LowBrau Le Twist Tuesdays w/ Sam I Jam, Adam J, Roger Carpio and Special Guests, 9 p.m.

Old Ironsides Karaoke, 9 p.m.

Pine Cove Open Mic Night, 9 p.m.

Powerhouse Pub Live Band Karaoke, 8 p.m.

Press Club Miss Ashleigh, 9 p.m.

Red Hawk Casino Coleen Heauser, 8 p.m.

Torch Club Lauren Wakefield, 3 p.m.; Michael Ray, 9 p.m.

12.30 wednesday

Bar 101 Open Mic, 7:30 p.m.

Club Car The Double Shots, 7:30 p.m.

Distillery Karaoke, 9 p.m.

Fox & Goose All Vinyl Wednesdays w/ DJ AA Knuff, 8 p.m.

G Street WunderBar DJ Larry Rodriguez, 10 p.m.

Harrah’s Lake Tahoe The Weight, 7:30 p.m.

Laughs Unlimited Karaoke, 8 p.m.

Luna’s Cafe Beyond Uranium, 8 p.m.

Mix DJ Gabe Xavier, DJ Peeti V, 9 p.m.

Nicholson’s MusiCafe Acoustic Open Mic, 6 p.m.

Old Ironsides Open Mic, 9 p.m.

Powerhouse Pub Local Licks Free Music Series w/ One Sharp Mind, Andrew Castro, Johnny Ray, 8 p.m.

Red Hawk Casino Branded, 8 p.m.

Starlite Lounge Spite, Kriminals, Wrath Of Tides, Petroglyphs, Lightfinder, 8 p.m.

Torch Club Sandra Dolores, 5:30 p.m.; Peter Petty Band, 9 p.m.

12.31 Thursday

Ace of Spades Y&T, Skin of Saints, ONOFF, Roswell, 7 p.m.

Bar 101 New Years Eve w/ Radio Heavy, 9:30 p.m.

Blackbird Studio 53 NYE Art Disco w/ Figgy, Sister Crayon (DJ Set), 7:30 p.m.

Capitol An Epik New Year w/ DJ Epik, 10 p.m.

Club Car Songwriters Showcase, 8 p.m.

The Coffee Garden Open Mic Night, 8 p.m.

Colonial Theatre Twitch Angry, From Hell, Unprovoked, 7 p.m.

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Issue 203 • December 21, 2015 – January 4, 2016

25

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Issue 203 • December 21, 2015 – January 4, 2016

Crest Theatre Jackie Greene Band, 8:30 p.m.

District 30 Bad Boy Bill, 9 p.m.

Dive Bar New Years Eve w/ Good Company, 9 p.m.

Fox & Goose DJ Larry Rodriguez, MC Ham, Wokstar, 9 p.m.

Harlow’s Mustache Harbor, 9 p.m.

The Hideaway Bar & Grill Trash Rock Thursdays, 9 p.m.

Hyatt Regency Apple Z, DJ Rated R, Quinn Hedges, Ryan Hernandez, 9 p.m.

Laughs Unlimited Four Barrel, 10 p.m.

Main Stage Theater (Grass Valley) Laughs, Lolo & Legs: Lolo Gervais, Jamal Walker and More, 9 p.m.

Mix DJ Eddie Edul, 9 p.m.

Momo DJ Oasis, 9 p.m.

MontBleu Resort Casino Pop Fiction and DJs, 8 p.m.

Old Ironsides Submerge Mag and Lipstick Present: New Years Eve w/ The Good Fortune (Live), DJ’s Shaun Slaughter, Roger Carpio, Adam Jay, 9 p.m.

Powerhouse Pub 8 Track Massacre, 8 p.m.

Press Club New Jack Fling w/ DJ’s CrookOne, BenJohnson, Satapana, 9 p.m.

Red Hawk Casino Chris Gardner Band, 5 p.m.; Audioboxx, 10 p.m.

Shine Jazz Jam w/ Jason Galbraith and the House Band, 8 p.m.

Thunder Valley Casino Resort KC & the Sunshine Band, 10:30 p.m.

Torch Club New Years Eve w/ Idea Team, Black Star Safari, 9 p.m.

1.01 FRIDAY

The Blue Lamp Lucky Lefty, 9 p.m.

Capitol Garage Fyah Fridays w/ DJ Jaytwo, 10 p.m.

Golden Bear DJ Crook, 10 p.m.

Kupros Craft House Michael Ray, 9:30 p.m.

Mix DJ Gabe Xavier, 9 p.m.

Nicholson’s MusiCafe Open Mic Night, 6 p.m.

Pine Cove Karaoke, 9 p.m.

Powerhouse Pub One Leg Chuck, 9:30 p.m.

Press Club DJ Rue, 9 p.m.

Red Hawk Casino Random Strangers, 4 p.m.; Big Band Boogie Rock, 9:30 p.m.

Torch Club Pailer & Fratis, 5:30 p.m.

1.02 Saturday

Bar 101 Scotty Vox, 9:30 p.m.

The Blue Lamp John’Nay Lasha, Ase Royal, Treed Kush, JCreep, Boney Jay, Nameless, Kique Franks, 9 p.m.

The Boardwalk J. Stalin, Lil Yase, 7 p.m.

Cache Creek Casino Selena The Premier Tribute, 8 p.m.

Capitol Garage Feel Good Saturday’s w/ DJ Epik, 10 p.m.

Goldfield Tyler Rich, 9 p.m.

Harlow’s Todd Morgan & the Emblems, Xochitl, The Old Screen Door, 5 p.m.; Tao Tariki, The Ellusive Fur’s, 9:30 p.m.

KBAR Z Rokk, 9 p.m.

Kupros Craft House Andrew Castro, 9:30 p.m.

Luna’s Cafe Feisty Females Concert In the Round: Jenn Rogar, Annie Corbett, Linda Michelle Hardy, Kym Trippsmith, 8 p.m.

Mix DJ Eddie Edul, 9 p.m.

Nicholson’s MusiCafe Free Ukulele Class, 1 p.m.

Pine Cove Karaoke, 9 p.m.

Powerhouse Pub Branded, 9:30 p.m.

Press Club DJ Larry Rodriguez, 9 p.m.

Red Hawk Casino Cover Me Badd, 10 p.m.

Shine Animals In the Attic, Paul Nicholas Slater, Mleo, 8 p.m.

Torch Club Pomegranate, 5:30 p.m.; Whoopie Qat, 9 p.m.

1.03 Sunday

Broderick Roadhouse Karaoke w/ DJ Jazcat, 9 p.m.

Cache Creek Casino Valerie V Big Band, 1 p.m.

Capitol Garage Karaoke w/ Jeff Jenkins, 9 p.m.

Distillery Karaoke, 8 p.m.

Mix DJ Gabe Xavier, 8:30 p.m.

Powerhouse Pub Used Blues Band, 3 p.m.

Press Club Sunday Night Soul Party w/ DJ Larry Rodriguez, 9 p.m.

Torch Club Blues Jam, 4 p.m.

Dive Into Sacramento & Its Surrounding Areas

1.02

now though Jan. 2

Felicia Michaels Gene Pompa Punchline 8 & 10 p.m.

1.04 Monday

The Boxing Donkey Open Mic Variety Night, 8 p.m.

Distillery Karaoke, 9 p.m.

Fox & Goose Open Mic Night, 7:30 p.m.

Goldfield Open Mic Night hosted by James Cavern, 9 p.m.

Louie’s Cocktail Lounge Karaoke, 9 p.m.

LowBrau Motown on Monday’s w/ DJ Epik, 9 p.m.

Luna’s Cafe Nebraska Mondays hosted by Ross Hammond, 7:30 p.m.

Comedy

Laughs Unlimited E Clark featuring Shane Murphy, Dec. 26 - 27, Sat., 8 & 10:30 p.m.; Sun., 7 p.m.

New Years Eve Comedy Show w/ Mike Marino, Dec. 31, 6 & 8:30 p.m.

Mike Marino featuring Kristen Frisk, Jan. 2 - 3, Sat., 8 & 10:30 p.m.; Sun., 7 p.m.

Luna’s Cafe Open Mic Comedy Hosted

by Jaime Fernandez, every Tuesday, 7:30 p.m.

Comix Holiday Show hosted

by Jamie Fernandez and Mike Cella, Dec. 23, 8 p.m.

Ooley Theater Comedy Night at the Ooley, every Thursday, 8 p.m.

Punchline Comedy Club Mike E. Winfield: Holiday Laughs, Dec. 23, 8 p.m.

Clinton Jackson, Dec. 26 27, Sat., 8 p.m. & 10 p.m.; Sun., 7 p.m.

Doug Benson, Dec. 29 - 30, 8 p.m.

SubmergeMag.com

Terraforming by Jared Tharp White Buffalo Gallery

2015’s Last Laughs: Ngaio Bealum, Kelly Price, Johnny Taylor, Keith Lowell Jensen, Dorian Foster, Carlos Rodriguez and More, Dec. 31, 7:30 & 10 p.m.

Gene Pompa with Felicia Michaels, Jan. 2, 8 & 10 p.m.

Lance Woods and Friends, Jan. 3, 7 p.m.

Sacramento Comedy Spot Open Mic, Sunday’s and Monday’s, 8 p.m.

Improv Lab, Harold Night & Gordon Teams, Wednesday’s, 7 - 10 p.m.

Cage Match & Improv Jam, Thursday’s, 8 - 10 p.m.

Anti-Cooperation League, Saturday’s, 9 p.m.

Tommy T’s The Real Housewives of Rio Linda, Dec. 26 -27, Sat., 7 & 9:45 p.m.; Sun., 7 p.m.

NYE Resolution Comedy Jam w/ Faizon Love and Tony Roberts, Dec. 31 - Jan. 2, Thurs. & Sat., 7 & 9:45 p.m.; Fri., 7 p.m.

Misc.

20th Street (Between J and K) Midtown Farmers Market, every Saturday, 8 a.m.

B Street Theatre Family Series: A Christmas Carol, through Dec. 27 Mainstage Series: Handle With Care by Jason Odell Williams, through Jan. 3 Blue Cue Bar Bingo, Wednesday’s, 9 p.m.

Blue Line Arts Gallery 30 x 30 Exhibit, through Jan. 9 Freeze Frame: Photography Art Competition, through Jan. 9

The Boxing Donkey Trivia Night, every Tuesday, 8 p.m.

Cal Expo Global Winter Wonderland: Magic of the Seasons, through Jan. 3 Capitol Garage Geeks Who Drink Trivia Night, Wednesday’s, 9 p.m.

Crest Theatre The Muppet Christmas Carol, Dec. 23, 6:30 p.m.

Die Hard (on 35MM Film), Dec. 26, 7:30 p.m.

Pennies From Heaven (on 35MM Film), Dec. 27, 7 p.m.

Crocker Art Museum Noon Year’s Eve: A Free Family Festival, Dec. 31, 10 a.m.

Divine Ammunition: The Sculpture of Al Farrow, through Jan. 3, 2016 Rain Forest Visions: Amazonian Ceramics from Ecuador/The Melza and Ted Barr Collection, through Feb. 14, 2016 Back to Life: Bay Area Figurative Drawings, through May 1, 2016 Folsom City Zoo Sanctuary Wild Nights and Holiday Lights, through Dec. 23 Fox & Goose Pub Quiz, Tuesday’s, 7 p.m.

Harris Center for the Arts High Voltage Holiday, Dec. 23, 7 p.m.

Historic Old Folsom Farmers’ Market, Saturdays, 8 a.m.

Kupros Craft House Trivia with Triviology 101, Sundays, 7:30 p.m.

Luna’s Cafe Poetry Unplugged, every Thursday, 8 p.m.

Midtown BarFly Salsa Lessons, every Wednesday, 8 p.m.

Old Sacramento 7th Annual Macy’s Theatre of Lights, through Dec. 31

16th Annual New Year’s Eve Sky Spectacular, Dec. 31, 9 p.m. & 12 a.m.

Pine Cove Trivia Night, Wednesday’s, 9 p.m.

Press Club Flex Your Head Trivia, every Tuesday, 8 p.m.

Frack Girls Timeless Tease Burlesque Show, Dec. 17, 9 p.m.

Raley Field The Biggest Show on Snow, through Jan. 3 Sacramento Convention Center SacAnime Winter 2016, Jan. 1-3 Sacramento Zoo PJ Day at the Zoo, Dec. 24, 10 a.m.

Sacred City Derby Girls Warehouse Winter Wonderland Scrimmage, Dec. 27, 10:30 a.m.

Sutter Street Theatre Holiday in the Hills, through Dec. 23 WAL Public Market Art Exhibit: 10 Under 100, Dec. 11 - Jan. 7 West Sacramento Black Box Theater Cinderella: A British Panto, through Dec. 23 White Buffalo Gallery Art Exhibit: Terraforming by Jared Tharp, though Jan. 2

drink specials all night

2718 J Street Sacramento

916.706.2275 • TheRedRabbit.net Facebook.com/SacRabbit

Issue 203 • December 21, 2015 – January 4, 2016

27

Running Into a Realization

How I Survived My New Year’s Resolution … and How It Changed My Life Words Amy Serna

“W

hat the hell did I get myself into?”

I thought as I sat in a porta-potty on Sunday, Dec. 8, 2013. The temperature was 26 degrees, I had just turned 26 years old and I was about to run 26.2 miles.

As I sat in the porta-potty thinking about my poor New Year’s resolution to run a marathon, I heard the announcer on the other side of the sticky door … “THREE, TWO, ONE … GO.” And I quickly realized I had just missed the epic intro to my very first marathon. So I finished my business, swung open the door and tried my best to grasp the insanity that I was about to run from Folsom to Sacramento.

And sure, running a marathon these days isn’t really a big deal but let me give you a little backstory on myself.

In eighth grade, running the mile felt like my entire insides were going to fall out of my body.

In high school, I had to stay in during lunch to pass a PE class because I couldn’t get a volleyball over the net. In college the only sport I played was beer pong. Then, at 25 I realized I couldn’t exercise for more than five seconds without feeling completely miserable and the reality of living an unhealthy future hit me hard.

After watching runners at the finish line of the California International Marathon in 2012, I made an impossible New Year’s resolution: to go from zero to marathon in 365 days. I quickly became obsessed with marathons. I bought training books on Amazon, watched Spirit of the Marathon twice and looked up every marathon in California.

Last Cut wasn’t so super?

Get it fixed at anthony’s barbershop 2408 21st st • Sac • sacramentobarbershop.com (916) 457-1120 • Tues-Fri 9am-6pm • saT 10am-4pm

28

Issue 203 • December 21, 2015 – January 4, 2016

Dive Into Sacramento & Its Surrounding Areas

But there was a small problem: I’d never even ran a half-marathon or a 10k, and I could barely jog around the park without feeling like my legs were going to fall off. It started off as very painful and slow jogs and walks around the dirt paths of Southside Park. I was always sore, tired, sweated profusely and felt like I had asthma. I don’t weigh 500 pounds, but it sure felt like I did. I tried to make small goals for myself to run from one stop sign to the next without stopping. Since I never really grew up playing sports, I had no idea how much water to drink after exercise or how much I should be stretching. Everything was completely new to me, and I had to learn along the way.

I stupidly signed up for my first 26.2 mile race before even running any other distance race. Most marathon training schedules are designed for people already in good shape who can be ready to go in four to five months. And all of the marathon advice I read urged me to be a runner for at least a year, then start to train for distance. But really, what’s the worst that could happen? In three months, I’d worked up to running 10 miles. I chose a training schedule and stuck with it as best as I could, starting from mile one and slowly increasing my mileage every week. My weeknights consisted of running around Southside Park and weekends consisted of long jogs around town.

But there is a price to be paid for “too much, too soon.” Throughout training for my first race, the Shamrock’n Half Marathon, I started to develop painful shin splints and was forced to stop running before causing any permanent damage. For three months I had to rely on cycling to maintain my fitness level and change my entire training schedule to replace running with cycling, which is of course another piece of advice experts don’t recommend. After a full recovery, and full discouragement, I put my running shoes back on, but this time with more hesitation.

I soon realized I not only had to change my exercise habits but had to change my entire lifestyle. I went from eating frozen pizzas to vegetables and pasta, from staying up late drinking to going to bed early to prepare for a morning run, from staring at a computer screen to stretching on the grass. I became a part of the Sacramento running scene by surrounding myself with other happy runners, where I found advice, encouragement and beer drinking buddies after

joining Sloppy Moose Running Club. I started to feel stronger, healthier and more confident.

I printed out Hal Higdon’s Novice 1 marathon training program and kept it tucked into my marathon training book. Week after week, I got excited to check off miles and was forced to adjust a few. Some of my runs were awesome and meditative, others were tiring and miserable. I watched myself train from 6 miles up to running 20 miles nonstop; it was hard to believe how far I’d actually come.

Then it was finally race day. I realized all the work I had put into one year was being put to the test in one morning. It was hard to relax and hard to get past the overwhelming thoughts of what lied ahead. The race started off with runners cheering,

Nicholson’s MusiCafe 6 3 2 E . B i d w E l l S t. F o l S o m tuesday

dec 22 7 pm

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dec 23 + dec 30 6 pm

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saturday

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Free ukulele class 1 pm

dec 26

Jan 2

acoustic oPen mic Beau J. halF steP doWn night Wilding acoustic-Folk-alternative 6 pm

*** closed dec 24, dec 25 & Jan 1 *** no ukulele class on dec 26 ***

Live Music. Beer On Tap. Organic Coffee.

SubmergeMag.com

laughing and talking. Miles 1 through 18 were more of a celebration of my training, I enjoyed the spectators, high-five stations and funny signs. But as the miles grew, all I could hear was the voice in my head and my feet pounding the pavement. The last remainder of the race felt like I was running the mile in middle school all over again. I wanted to collapse face-first on the pavement. Every mile after 21 felt longer than the mile before it. I remember one woman shouting at me, “Are you OK?!” I was running like I just drank 26.2 beers.

After I saw mile 26 slowly pass by, I tried my best not to look so miserable. I put my hands in the air, tears filled up my eyes and I crossed the finish line after 5 hours and 12 minutes.

One New Year’s resolution changed my

e

exercise, eating and sleeping habits, and put me the best shape I’ve ever been in my entire life.

Since then I’ve run two full marathons, one 18-mile trail run, four half-marathons and one duathalon.

And I don’t plan on stopping any time soon. My next goal is to run a half-marathon in under two hours (fast for me), then sign up for my next 26.2 race. I’m eyeing the San Francisco Marathon.

The best advice I can give for anyone getting through any New Year’s resolution is don’t let anyone tell you, “You can’t do it.” And especially don’t ever tell yourself that. Surround yourself with positive people and positive thoughts, no matter how crappy a moment can feel. Because you never know what can happen in 365 days.

T o k i c k- o f f T h e n e w y e a r & m a k e r o o m f o r n e w i n v e n T o r y, LiTTLe reLics is Throwing a huge

SaL ! december 28, 29, 30

30% off aLL jeweLry

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25% off SeLect art

LittLe ReLics Boutique & Galleria 908 21st Street (between I & J) Midtown Sac 916.346.4615 • Littlerelics.com

* Open Christmas Eve 9am-4pm Holiday closure to hang with our families: Dec 25-27, 31 + Jan 1 (well, because we like to celebrate)

Thank you in advance for supporTing LiTTLe reLics in The new year

Issue 203 • December 21, 2015 – January 4, 2016

29

tuesday

feb 23

saturday

mar 5

the shallow end Call Me Oracle

harlow’s • 2708 j street sacto • 21 & over • 8:00pm

harlow’s • 2708 j street sacto • 21 & over • 9:00pm

Mike Dillon BanD lil’ sMokies tsol + left alone the easy leaves holiDay social chicano BatMan scott PeMBerton trio the Motet

B lu e l a m p • 14 0 0 a l h a m B r a B o u l e va r d • s ac r a m en to • 21 & ov er • 8:0 0 pm

h a r l o w ’ s • 270 8 J s t r e e t • s a c r a m e n t o • 21 & o v e r • 8: 0 0 p m

B l u e l a m p • 14 0 0 a l h a m B r a B o u l e v a r d • s a c r a m e n t o • 21 & o v e r • 8 : 0 0 p m

h a r l o w ’ s • 270 8 J s t r e e t • s a c r a m e n t o • 21 & o v e r • 9 : 0 0 p m

h a r l o w ’ s • 270 8 J s t r e e t • s a c r a m e n t o • 21 & o v e r • 8: 0 0 p m

h a r l o w ’ s • 270 8 J s t r e e t • s a c r a m e n t o • 21 & o v e r • 9 :3 0 p m

soPhistafunk

h a r l o w ’ s • 270 8 J s t r e e t • s a c r a m e n t o • 21 & o v e r • 8: 0 0 p m

alo

Wednesday

jan 13 Wednesday

jan 13 sunday

jan 17 thursday

jan 21 sunday

jan 24 sunday

jan 31 Wednesday

feb 3 friday

Baskery

h a r l o w ’ s • 270 8 J s t r e e t • s a c r a m e n t o • 21 & o v e r • 8: 0 0 p m

the infaMous stringDusters the l adies & Gentlemen tour

h a r l o w ’ s • 270 8 J s t r e e t • s a c r a m e n t o • 21 & o v e r • 8: 0 0 p m

ProtoMartyr chastity belt • g. green

B l u e l a m p • 14 0 0 a l h a m B r a B o u l e va r d • s a c r a m e n t o • 21 & o v e r • 8: 0 0 p m

Dengue fever anDerson east + Dylan leBlanc the Brothers coMatose

h a r l o w ’ s • 270 8 J s t r e e t • s a c r a m e n t o • 21 & o v e r • 9 : 0 0 p m

h a r l o w ’ s • 270 8 J s t r e e t • s a c r a m e n t o • 21 & o v e r • 8: 0 0 p m

(cD release show) Miss lonely hearts

feb 19 tuesday

feb 23 saturday

mar 5 saturday

mar 5 tuesday

mar 8 saturday

mar 19

h a r l o w ’ s • 270 8 J s t r e e t • s a c r a m e n t o • 21 & o v e r • 9 : 0 0 p m

the Black lillies

h a r l o w ’ s • 270 8 J s t r e e t • s a c r a m e n t o • 21 & o v e r • 8: 0 0 p m

tuesday

mar 22

all tickets available at: abstractpresents.com & ticketfly.com tickets for harlow’s shows also available at harlows.com tickets for crest theatre shows also available at crestsacramento.com

30

tickets for Blue laMP shows also bluelampsacramento.com tickets for ace of sPaDes also available at aceofspadessac.com & 916.443.9202

Issue 203 • December 21, 2015 – January 4, 2016

People say it’s impossible to predict the future, but I think that’s because they’ve never actually tried. Stop being so defeatist, people, it’s easy to predict the future. I’m going to do it right now, and if I can do it, anyone can.

As 2015 ends, we should probably look forward to 2016, since it’s the next chronological year. Once the clock strikes midnight, signifying the shift from Dec. 31 to Jan. 1, the year that we knew as 2015 will be gone forever. It will be the New Year … which will be 2016, as previously mentioned.

See what I did there? I just predicted the future. I even did so accurately. See how easy that was?

If this feels like deja vu, that’s because we really have been here before. A year ends every year. Don’t think about that too hard, because it will blow your mind. To blow your mind even further, I’m going to predict a few more things that will happen in 2016.

I’m Getting Married in March: While you may find it hard to believe, I have convinced a young woman to marry me.

I’m as shocked as you are.

We’re getting married in March 2016. I know this will happen, because we’ve already set a date with a venue and a church and have spent roughly the gross national product of a small island nation on the whole thing already. Even if said bride-to-be comes to her senses and decides she’s better off without me, I’m still going to get married in March, even if I have to stand there by myself and pantomime the whole ceremony, because the cheapskate who dwells deep in my heart won’t let all that money go to waste.

Whatever Money I Don’t Spend on My Wedding, I’ll Spend on Magic: The Gathering: That cheapskate who dwells deep in my heart seems to have no qualms about me paying a biweekly tithe to Wizards of the Coast in exchange for their brightly colored 63-by-88 millimeter pieces of cardboard. I sort of blame Vice and their short, yet fascinating, documentary, Magic: the Gathering - Inside the World’s Most Played Trading Card Game, for reigniting my love for the game. Or at least for collecting the cards. I don’t really play the game. I do sometimes, but even though it’s “the world’s most played trading card game,” I don’t really know anyone who plays … I guess because I’m almost 40. But they’re just so

James Barone jb@submergemag.com cool. They have dragons and angels and elves on them and stuff. I even have a couple of unicorns.

I Predict You’re Judging Me Right Now: Don’t lie!

You totally are! I don’t judge you for your stupid shit—at least not to your face—so just stop!

Please … ?

I’m a perfect four-for-four so far on my predictions for 2016, but you’re probably saying to yourself that I’m taking the easy way out. I’m just making personal predictions. What about the whole wide world? Well, OK, try this one on for size: We Will Elect a New President on Nov. 8, 2016, and the Process of Doing So Will Make Us Sick: The Wall Street Journal has posted a Presidential election calendar on their website, marking all the major events along the campaign trail from now until The Big Day, from debates to primaries to National Conventions for both major parties, and I can’t help but look at it and feel queasy. It makes me think of all the Facebook posts we’re going to have to endure, all the useless bickering from both sides, all the “facts” that people are going to throw in our faces, all the petty name-calling and finger-pointing.

Look at the people who are running for President of the United States in 2016. Just look at them. Ben Carson is a neurosurgeon who doesn’t believe in dinosaurs. Ted Cruz filibustered a session of Congress by reciting Green Eggs and Ham. I’m pretty sure Hillary Clinton will say or do anything as long as it ensures that it will get her elected. There’s a Bush somewhere in the mix too, right? I could’ve sworn there was a Bush, because really, what’s a presidential race without a Bush involved? I don’t even want to say the T-word.

There’s a killswitch in my brain that prevents me from speaking the words “President Tr … u …” See? I can’t even type them. It’s crazy. But maybe you’re feeling the Bern. Yeah, I like him too. He’s old, kooky and really liberal. I totally want to be Bernie Sanders when I grow up. I love his Brooklyn accent and his crazy hand gestures.

But close your eyes. Look far ahead to Jan. 2017, which at this present time is even beyond my vision. Do you see President Sanders delivering his inaugural address? If you do, I’d love to have some of what you’re smoking.

For MJP. RIP to you, my dear friend.

Dive Into Sacramento & Its Surrounding Areas

SubmergeMag.com

Issue 203 • December 21, 2015 – January 4, 2016

31

Dive into Sacramento & its Surrounding Areas December 21, 2015 – January 4, 2016

#203

16 2016!

NYE Parties to Usher In

0 to 26.2 our writer's resolution to

Sai Wong Ramen Empire 3

run a marathon in 365 days

Dance Lessons for Just $1

TheGood Fortune

Straight from the Soul

DJ Crook Elixir

Bring Home a New Fur Friend for the Holidays

The Life of the Party

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