AGUIDETO ADOPTINGAGAIN WITHSTDAVID’S
LETTERFROM THECEO
As CEO of St David's Adoption Service, I’m delighted to introduce our new guide: “A Guide to Adopting again with St David’s” This comprehensive resource reflects our ongoing commitment to supporting families at every stage of the adoption journey.
Adopting a child is a significant and life-changing decision especially when there are already children in the home. This guide has been thoughtfully developed to offer practical advice, insights, and key information to help families navigate the unique dynamics that can arise in this situation. Our aim is to empower families to create loving, secure, and nurturing environments for all their children those already in the home and those joining through adoption.
We work closely with adoption specialists, psychologists, and experienced adoptive families to ensure the guide is rich in expert insight. From preparing children for the arrival of a new sibling, to understanding legal and financial considerations, this guide offers realistic, practical steps to support informed and confident decision-making.
We also know that adoption is an emotional journey That’s why we’ve included guidance on emotional wellbeing, strategies for resilience, and signposts to further support The guide features real-life success stories from families who’ve welcomed adopted children into homes with existing siblings stories that offer inspiration, reassurance, and hope
At St David’s, we believe every child deserves a loving and stable family Our team is here to provide tailored guidance and support to help families grow with confidence and compassion I invite you to explore “A Guide to Adopting again with St David’s” and make use of the tools, tips, and stories it holds Whether you’re just beginning to consider adoption again, are well into the process, or are supporting someone on their journey, we hope this guide is a valuable companion.
Thank you for your continued trust in St. David’s Adoption Service. Together we are building brighter futures for children and families.
Warm regards,
Jason Bak
JASON BAKER,
AFAMILY’SGUIDETO ADOPTIONWITH CHILDREN
THE PROCESS
Second time adopting with St Davids
If you are adopting again, the process is slightly different from what you experienced the first time, but much will feel familiar
To start, get in touch with us again If you are still in contact with your previous social worker, you might want to reach out to them first If not, please contact our office at 02920 667 007 or info@stdavidscsorg
Someone will get in touch with you to discuss the next steps
Initially, we will arrange a visit to your home to talk about returning to adoption. Ideally, this visit will be conducted by someone you already know, so you won’t need to revisit information you’ve previously shared. During the visit, we’ll discuss how your life has changed since your last adoption and why you believe now is a good time to adopt again.
If you decide to proceed after the visit, you will need to submit a ‘Registration of Interest’ form. This form may look familiar if you began the adoption process after 2020.
We will aim to assign you a social worker you know, but that’s not possible, we’ll carefully match you with a suitable social worker for your assessment Unlike your original assessment, there is no Stage One and Stage Two Instead, you will undergo a ‘Fast Track Assessment,’ which combines the required checks and references with the social worker’s assessment, and is completed within 4 months
In the early stages of the ‘Fast Track Assessment,’ you will be offered a short ‘Preparation to adopt a second time workshop.’
While it’s not a requirement, some families choose to refresh their knowledge or gain new insights from the perspective of already parenting a child, by attending the three-day ‘introduction to adoption training’, others may feel they do not need to repeat it.
Since we have previously assessed you, we won’t need to cover all the same ground. Instead, we will focus on updating your assessment to reflect your current experience as a parent and your expectations for family life after adopting again
From here, the process will feel very familiar Your assessment will be completed and presented to the adoption panel within 4 months of accepting your registration of interest You might find it helpful to review our other guides, such as ‘Coming to Panel’ and ‘Linking and Introductions,’ to refresh your understanding of the processes, as each adoption can differ from the previous one.
When assessing second- or third-time adopters, it’s important to consider the children already in placement. Your social worker will talk with you about how you have adjusted to parenthood the first time and how your initial placement developed.
The assessment also needs to explore your capacity to meet the needs of an additional child or children, recognising that you will not only be caring for two , three or four children but also supporting them to settle into a newly formed family structure Where the children are not siblings, we will explore with you the demands of contact arrangements and life journey work with two sets of birth families
PREPARING THEFAMILY
Adopting again is a significant and life-changing decision one that requires careful thought and preparation, especially when there are already children in the household. At St. David's Adoption Service, we understand the importance of this journey and are here to offer practical guidance and support every step of the way.
Talking together about the decision to adopt gives everyone children included a chance to share their thoughts, ask questions, and express any worries These conversations help ensure that every family member feels heard, valued, and supported
Assessing your family’s readiness is a vital step This includes reflecting on emotional preparedness, stability, financial resources, and the strength of your support network For families with existing children, it’s especially important to consider how each child might be affected, and to ensure that everyone feels included and involved in the journey ahead.
Any assessment of a second- or third-time adopter will explore the attachment and trauma history of the child or children already in placement, alongside an analysis of how introducing another child might affect both the existing child(ren) and the prospective adopter. These considerations are particularly relevant within the ‘fast track’ process, though additional issues may arise depending on the individual family. Such matters are complex and require sufficient time and resources to ensure that the adopters are well-matched and suitable to care for an additional child
Adoption is a journey that involves the whole family support network It’s vital that everyone is committe and prepared St David’s offers a workshop to fami and friends to refresh existing supporters or involve ones in your network
When you already have children, preparing them fo adoption and a new sibling is key Age-appropriate conversations, answering questions, and involving th in preparations help foster love, acceptance, and inclusivity.
For families adopting a child of a different cultural o racial background, learning about and celebrating th child’s heritage is essential. St. David’s supports families to embrace diversity, build cultural understanding, and create inclusive environments that honour identity. Emotional support is also crucial. Connecting with o adoptive families, joining support groups are a stron way to develop your support network even further.
Learning from your previous experiences of attachm trauma-informed parenting, being patient and flexib during your first adoption we will build upon these s to prepare you and your family for adopting again
ROUTESTO ADOPTINGAGAIN
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Adopting siblings as a second-time adoption
This offers a unique and fulfilling journey, full of both challenges and rewards. Providing a loving, stable home for multiple children not only meets their need for security and belonging but can also strengthens the bond between siblings. It’s important, however, to carefully consider the practical and emotional demands of raising more than one child.
This includes assessing your ability to meet the diverse needs of each child, manage financial resources, and provide sufficient attention and support to every sibling. While the journey may be complex, the chance to keep siblings together and offer them a nurturing family environment is deeply rewarding, creating a strong sense of purpose and connection for both you and the children. At St. David’s, we have extensive experience placing sibling groups with adoptive families.
Within our adoption service, we also have a specialised programme called Adopting Together, which provides therapeutically led support for children and families We work closely with local authorities to identify children who may wait longer for adoption, giving you the opportunity to learn more about them and discuss potential matches If you are approved and matched with a child through Adopting Together, you will receive a tailored support package before, during, and after the child or children join your family Our Adopting Together families benefit from 1:1 consultations with a clinical psychologist, alongside ongoing access to therapeutic, psychology-led parenting support group, facilited by our partner orgnaision The Family Place.
To hear directly from an adoptive family, you can watch our In Conversation session with Sarah, who shares her experiences of adopting siblings. You can find the video [HERE].
IN CONVERSATION
Naomi and Nick are parents to four children through adoption an energetic, loving family built over time and with intention. They first adopted a sibling group of three, and more recently welcomed a fourth child into their home. We caught up with them to talk about how their family has grown and changed, what they've learned along the way, and what it's like parenting four children through adoption.
How has your family dynamic changed since welcoming your fourth child, and how are your original three children adjusting to the change?
In some ways, the dynamic hasn’t changed too much we’ve always been a busy, loud family who love spending time together. But it’s definitely shifted in other ways Our youngest is a very active toddler who loves to climb everything, and we quickly realised that what we thought was a child-proof house wasn’t quite up to the task! We've had to make changes to the house and garden again to keep up with him
The older kids have adjusted well They adore their little brother, though they’ve had to learn how to play with him in a way that suits his age and energy and when to give him a bit of space too.
What helped you decide the right time to adopt again, and what hopes did you have for your growing family?
We both come from big families, and even when we were adopting the first time, we had a feeling we might go through the process again. But we also knew it would depend on how things went we didn’t want to move forward unless it felt right for our children too.
Thankfully, the older three are very open, nurturing, and welcoming. Our eldest brought up the idea of adopting again before we even mentioned it, which meant a lot. As a family, we felt we had the space and love to offer another child a home, and that led us to take the next step. Our biggest hope was simply to be the right family for another child to give them the best possible chance of a loving and secure future.
What have been some of the unexpected joys and challenges in parenting four children through adoption?
There have been so many joyful moments one of the biggest is watching our children grow and thrive Seeing them come out of their shells, develop confidence, and become bold, caring individuals has been a privilege It’s also really touching when people are surprised to hear they’re adopted, because they’ve picked up so many of our traits and mannerisms along the way They’re still very much their people, but there are lovely echoes of our personalities too
Of course, every child adopted or not comes with their challenges, and we’ve learned that what works for one doesn’t always work for another. We’ve also had to grow in confidence ourselves around having open conversations. We’ve worked hard to create a space where nothing is off limits, and they know they can ask anything about their past or their future. That’s been a big learning curve, but an important one.
How are you balancing the different emotional and developmental needs of each child, especially as they process their stories and transitions?
The longer we’ve been parents, the more we’ve understood just how different each child is While we aim to treat them equally, we’ve learned that doesn’t mean parenting them all in the same way Each one needs something slightly different, and that’s okay
We try to give each child some one-on-one “mummy or daddy time” whenever we can even if it’s just a quick trip to the shop or a walk They value that time, and so do we We also make sure to give them notice about what’s coming up, so they have time to process or ask questions. And we try to be aware of moments that might stir up f li like key dates or school events so we can be ready to em.
elp has been important too. Whether it’s arranging o get to appointments or school events, we don’t try to do ourselves. We also mark Adoption Day each year as a celebrate our family and, if they want to, look at their life s together.
What support – formal or informal – from St David’s has been most helpful in this new chapter?
We were really lucky to have the same social worker for both adoptions, which made a big difference. That existing relationship gave us a lot of confidence and made everything feel a bit smoother. We felt supported right from the start again and knew that St David’s would help find the right fit for our family.
There’s also been great informal support like when one of us ran the Cardiff Half Marathon for St David’s. The encouragement we got around that was brilliant, and just another reminder that we’re not on our own in this
How are you managing different contact plans for your children?
All four children have letterbox contact The older three have it once a year, and our youngest has it twice a year There’s a mix in terms of engagement from birth families sometimes we hear back, sometimes we don’t
Our youngest isn’t old enough to understand yet, but we’re conscious that this may become more challenging as they grow. For now, we focus on what we can do which is to write those letters each year. We can’t control what responses come, but we can show our children that we’ve done everything we could to keep that link open for their sake.
What would you say to other adoptive families thinking about adopting again?
Take your time and be honest with yourselves and each other. Make sure it feels right for everyone in the family not just you as parents, but your children too. And if it does feel right, then it can be one of the most rewarding journeys you’ll ever go on
Naomi and Nick’s journey is a powerful reminder that family doesn’t stand still — it grows, changes, and deepens over time, especially when built on openness, love, and shared intention.
Ready for the next chapter? Lets start the conversation - Here
NEXT STEPS
We hope this overview has been helpful, however, if you have any questions or with to start your journey, please get in touch with one of our team on 02920 667 007 or contact us at info@stdavidscsorg
There is further information, including a Legal Framework for Adoption, on our website stdavidsadoptionservice.org
We look forward to supporting you on your adoption journey!
Other places to gain information on adoption:
Association for Adoption and Fostering Cymru (AFKA) – 029 2076 1155 afacymru.org.uk
Adoption UK 02920 230319 adoptionuk.org
NAS Room 475, County Hall, Atlantic Wharf, Cardiff CF10 4UW
029 2087 3927 contact@adoptcymrucom
CONTRIBUTORS
SHAUN HOUCKE
Shaun, a devoted advocate for adoption, joined St David’s in 2023 He and his husband adopted their son through St David's in 2020, providing him with unique insights into the adoption process. Committed to making a positive impact, Shaun brings first-hand experience to those considering adoption. His journey inspires him to create an inclusive space within adoption, offering support and guidance to families with children looking to adopt. Shaun's advocacy and dedica make him a valuable resource for those seeking informa connection within the adoption community.
DANIEL WARNER
Dan is a dedicated St. David's team member, joining in 2014 after valuable experience with another fostering and adoption charity. Passionate about creating inclusive dialogue, Dan fervently believes in encouraging prospective adopters from diverse backgrounds to participate actively in the adoption conversation. With a commitment to fostering a welcoming and supportive environment, Dan plays a vital role in this St David's Guide, ensuring that everyone feels empowered and informed on their adoption journey
CONTACT
St David’s Adoption Service
Lambourne House, Llanishen Business Park, Cardiff CF14 5GL
029 2066 7007 or info@stdavidscsorg
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Registered Office: Lambourne House, Llanishen Business Park, Cardiff CF14 5GL
St David’s Children Society is registered as a charity with the Charity Commission for England and Wales (Registration No: 509163) and a company limited by Guarantee (Registered Cardiff 1546688) St David’s Adoption Service is the brand name of the St David’s Children Society’s adoption service
Mae Cymdeithas Plant Dewi Sant wedi ei chofrestru fel elusen gyda Chomisiwn Elusennau Cymru a Lloegr (Rhif Cofrestru: 509163) a chwmni cyfyngedig drwy Warant (Cofrestredig Caerdydd 1546688)
Gwasanaeth Mabwysiadu Dewi Sant yw enw brand gwasanaeth mabwysiadu Cymdeithas Plant Dewi Sant
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