National Coming Out Day with Life4All

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NATIONAL COMING OUT DAY

"I BELIEVE THAT TELLING OUR STORIES, FIRST TO OURSELVES AND THEN TO ONE ANOTHER AND THE WORLD, IS A REVOLUTIONARY ACT."

Janet Mock Transgender rights activist

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Living Openly: Coming Out Guides and Resources Feature: To Come Out Or Not To Come Out: Here’s The Dilemma!

Brave Space Alliance

Project Vida

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Magazine curated by:

Soumita Das, The Nascent Group

All of us who are openly gay are living and writing the history of our movement.

We are no more - and no less - heroic than the suffragists and abolitionists of the 19th century; and the labor organizers, Freedom Riders, Stonewall demonstrators, and environmentalists of the 20th century.

We are ordinary people, living our lives, and trying as civil-rights activist Dorothy Cotton said, to 'fix what ain't right' in our society. ~Senator Tammy Baldwin

Thirty-two years ago, on the anniversary of the National March on Washington for Lesbian and Gay Rights, National Coming Out Day was first observed as a reminder that one of our most basic tools is the power of coming out. Coming out — whether it is as lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender or queer — STILL MATTERS.

An Overview

October 2020

CELEBRATE NATIONAL COMING OUT DAY WITH LIFE4ALL!

Whether you're lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender or queer, be proud of who you are and your support for LGBTQ equality this Coming Out Day!Every year on National Coming Out Day, we celebrate coming out as lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender or queer (LGBTQ.) This year, we will mark the 32nd anniversary of National Coming Out Day!

COMING OUT: LIVING AUTHENTICALLY AS LESBIAN, GAY AND BISEXUAL+

By Human Rights Campaign

We all deserve the right to live our lives genuinely, completely and honestly. Race, ethnicity, language, religion, culture, gender expression, sexual orientation and gender identity should never be barriers to us living our full lives. For LGBTQ people, coming out is often a significant part of reclaiming this right and living in our identity publicly.

While some people are attracted only to people of the gender different from them (commonly known as being straight), others may be attracted to people of genders that are similar to theirs, or to more than one gender. We use many words to describe non-straight attraction — lesbian, gay, bisexual, pansexual, queer and fluid are all commonly used labels.

Coming Out: Living Authentically as Lesbian, Gay and Bisexual+ was designed to help you and your loved ones through the coming out process in realistic and practical terms. It acknowledges that the experience of coming out and living openly covers the full spectrum of human emotion — from paralyzing fear to unbounded euphoria.

COMING OUT: LIVING AUTHENTICALLY AS TRANSGENDER OR NON-BINARY

In the United States, gender is often presented to us as the mutually unchangeable opposites of either male or female. The truth is that gender is a rich, broad spectrum that comes in as many forms as there are people.

For many, expressing gender is unconscious. It’s as simple as styling their hair or choosing their outfit, and causes no angst or uncertainty.

But for those of us whose gender identity or innate sense of our own gender doesn’t match with what was assigned to us at birth, unraveling and expressing gender can be complex and difficult.

Many of these individuals identify as “transgender,” an umbrella term that describes a wide range of people who experience or express their gender in a way that does not necessarily align with what they were assigned at birth. The term “transgender” covers many different gender identities, such as nonbinary, gender fluid, agender, genderqueer, trans man, trans woman, or simply just trans.

Coming Out: Living Authentically as Transgender or Non-Binary will use the phrase “transgender and non-binary” to try to best capture this broad array of identities. That being said, it is important to recognize that not all people in these groups may identify as transgender or non-binary. In addition, there may be transgender or nonbinary people whose gender does not fit in any of the terms described above. This resource is meant for anyone and everyone whose gender does not fit what they were assigned at birth.

No matter who you are, we affirm you, and your gender is valid.

To Come Out Or Not To Come Out: Here’s The Dilemma!

By Anjali Joshi

“If you possess enough courage to speak out what you are, you will find you are not alone.” ― Richard Wright, Black Boy October 11th every year is recognised and celebrated as National Coming Out Day; a day where you walk your truth, celebrate your difference and find a bunch of people who share your love and glory. Even as October 11th, 2020 will mark the 32nd Coming Out Day and lesbian, bisexual, gay, transgender, queer, intersex, and asexual folx have continued to fight and raise awareness for queer right and acceptance, we still have a long way to go.

National Coming Out Day, an emotional day for a lot of people and marks the anniversary of1987 National March on Washington for Gay and Lesbian Rights to call on the thenpresident Ronald Reagen to address the epidemic of HIV/AIDS, that had killed thousands of people. Since then, this day is a remembrance of the different identities we occupy and the power that collective solidarity that still holds. However, 31 years later, perhaps it is also time to address some of the questions that have been asked repeatedly in the context of LGBTQIA rights and contextualize this in the current context.

Why is speaking out important?

Homophobia/queerphobia thrives on silence. When someone walks their truth, it not only inspires someone else to speak up but also emphasizes visibility. To tell the world that we exist and that we deserve to exist without harassment and have equal rights. Speaking up takes a lot of courage and strength. For many queer folx, coming out is a deeply personal journey and yet inherently political.

The fact that many people from our community spoke up before we were even born, fought for our common rights and ensured that there exist spaces like drag balls and the Pride March that provide a safe space for the LGBTQIA+ community, is why a lot of us also have the power to assert ourselves so unapologetically. For that we are eternally grateful and will keep speaking up.

Why do only queer people celebrate Pride? What about straight pride?

In an alternate universe, straight pride could be an amazing thing. After all, when you are proud of your identity and want to celebrate it, shouldn’t be amazing? The problem is, that we live in a deeply unequal world; one where a certain people/communities are persecuted because of who they are and where living your truth can be construed as a radical and threatedning act for the prejudiced. When we live in a world where certain individuals are reduced to their immediate identities, perceived as dangerous and “unnatural”, claiming pride in your identity is a revolutionary act. Pride is meant to acknowledge and celebrate the existence of queer people across the spectrum. The LGBTQIA+ community has had to live in silence, faced violence and have had to hide their identities for survival alone. Against the backdrop of everyday realities of queer folx, the term “pride” resounds with resilience and strength.

What is the problem with heteronormativity?

H e t e r o n o r m a t i v i t y d o e s n o t e q u a t e h e t e r o se x u a l i t y . T h e d i f f e r e n c e i s t h a t w h e n t h e b e h a v i o r s a n d i d e n t i t i e s o f h e t e r o se x u a l p e o p l e i s a ssu m e d t o b e t h e “ n o r m ” a n d a n y difference is rendered “deviant”, it creates a power hierarchy that has claimed many l i v e s i n t h e p a s t a n d c o n t i n u e s t o d o so . I a m su r e y o u a r e f a m i l i a r w i t h t h i s homophobic phrase “It’s Adam and Eve, not Adam and Steve” or something similar on t h e l i n e s o f “ T h i s i s n o t h o w i t i s su p p o se d t o b e ” . T h i s “ su p p o s e d n e s s ” o f w h a t constitutes normal behavior and what is unacceptable for society breeds prejudice a n d h a t e . T h i s i s w h y h e t e r o n o r m a t i v i t y n e e d s t o b e d i st a m a n t l e d .

W h a t d o e s “ c o m i n g o u t ” m e a n ? I s i t m a n d a t o r y fo r e v e r y q u e e r p e rs o n t o “ co m e out’?

“ C o m i n g o u t ” t o y o u r f a m i l y , f r i e n d s o r l o v e d o n e s i s w h e n y o u a c k n o w l e d g e /d i s c l o s e your identity as a queer person in expectations of acceptance and love. This is i m p o r t a n t b e c a u s e n o t h a v i n g t o sh a r e a n i m p o r t a n t a sp e c t o f y o u r i d e n t i t y w i t h p e o p l e y o u l o v e c a n v e r y d i s t r e ssi n g a n d a l o n e l y e x p e r i e n ce . Co m i n g o u t i s u s u a l l y a l o n g j o u r n e y , t a k e s a l o t o f c o u r a g e a n d st r e n g t h , b e c a u se g i v e n t h e u n e q u a l w o r l d w e l i v e i n , t h e f e a r o f r e j e c t i o n c a n b e so p e r si st e n t .

This being said, it is also my prerogative to point out why there are people who are increasingly advocating against the concept of “coming out” . While “coming out” can be a necessary step in many people’s lives, it need not be an essential phenomenon in everyone’s life. For many of us it may not be a possibility, for some of us we may just want to continue to form non-biolohical families that accept us unconditionally, or maybe we are estranged from our biological families. Whatever choice we make, as long as we are happy and find meaning in it, that’s okay. In many cases it may not be possible for a person to acknowledge their identity publicly and this may also endanger their life and make them susceptible to other forms of violence, aggression and ostracization.

This being said, it is also my prerogative to point out why there are people who are increasingly advocating against the concept of “coming out” . While “coming out” can be a necessary step in many people’s lives, it need not be an essential phenomenon in everyone’s life. For many of us it may not be a possibility, for some of us we may just want to continue to form non-biolohical families that accept us unconditionally, or maybe we are estranged from our biological families. Whatever choice we make, as long as we are happy and find meaning in it, that’s okay. In many cases it may not be possible for a person to acknowledge their identity publicly and this may also endanger their life and make them susceptible to other forms of violence, aggression and ostracization.

As I ask these questions to people and to myself repeatedly, I am also made aware of the complex everyday realities of queer people and that perhaps there is not overarching answer but a need to cultivate a better and accepting community. Good news is, in an era of post-globalization with increasing connectivity, we can form as many families as we want. We can find new people, from different nation, different classes and color and find common ground of shared experiences and collective solidarities. And even though 2020 feels like the end of the world, there is hope, there is love and there is kindness and acceptance. That’s all we need to begin a better and safer world.

BRAVE SPACE ALLIANCE

Brave Space Alliance is the first Black-led, trans-led LGBTQ Center located on the South Side of Chicago, dedicated to creating and providing affirming, culturally competent, forus by-us resources, programming, and services for LGBTQ individuals on the South and West sides of the city. We strive to empower, embolden, and educate each other through mutual aid, knowledge-sharing, and the creation of community-sourced resources as we build toward the liberation of all oppressed peoples.

STRATEGIC PRIORITIES Health and Wellness – We view health and wellness as broad concepts, reaching far beyond getting tested or focusing on medical services. Queer and trans people face unique barriers to living full, healthy lives. We break down these barriers by offering programs that focus on the needs in our community, such as food insecurity, housing insecurity, and economic justice.

Visibility and Expansion – We want Black and Brown queer and trans people to be seen, wherever and however they want to be seen. And we know our community deserves services that are accessible to them, in the neighborhoods in which they live. Brave Space is striving to expand our programming to all parts of the South and West sides; if you are located there and want to partner with us, please reach out!

Bravery and Solidarity – We step away from the language of safety, because we know that queer and trans people can never truly be safe in spaces and communities that are not of our own making. We instead emphasize bravery-- living one’s fullest, truest, and best life in the face of oppression-- and solidarity as ideals for the longevity of our communities and the best hopes for queer and trans liberation.

To know more about the work they are doing visit: Brave Space Alliance

PROJECT VIDA Project VIDA was founded in 1992 to address the urgent needs of racial and ethnic minorities. Initially, the agency provided HIV education through street outreach services to area youth. Now, Project VIDA has expanded its community scope by initiating a variety of programs: direct services for people infected or affected by HIV/AIDS and various prevention education programs.

Their mission is to improve quality of life and reduce health disparities in underserved communities by promoting self-empowerment and providing holistic health education and direct services.

Public Benefits Social Services Risk-Reduction Counseling Prevention Services Prevention Workshops HIV/STI testing Condom Distribution for the Community Acupunture Massage Therapy Individual and Group Behavioral Health Counseling To know more about their exciting work check out their website: Project Vida

LIFE 4 ALL Founded on the belief that it takes only ONE person to save another human life. With the support of every single one of you, we can succeed no matter your sexual orientation, race, or age. The bullet that is health disparities aims at all and it is our goal to provide support for all to receive the services they deserve. So, until the disparities face by communities with unfair access to appropriate primary and mental health services, we vow to be a leader in brining health equality and resources to the disenfranchised by breathing education and prevention services in our communities, thus creating a clear path for a more unified, stronger, and healthier future.

OPENNESS MAY NOT COMPLETELY DISARM PREJUDICE, BUT IT'S A GOOD PLACE TO START.

Jason Collins