QSaltLake Magazine - Issue 306 - November 21, 2019

UNIT Y FES T SPOR T S & NIGH T LY E VEN T S • WORLD AIDS DAY • GRINDR /SCRUFF SCAM IN SALT L AK E

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ISSUE 306 | November 21, 2019

PRESENTING SPONSOR

KICKOFF PARTY FEATURING THURSDAY, DEC. 12

NOVEMBER 21, 2019 |

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7 SPORTS. 4 DAYS. 1 CITY. DECEMBER 12–15 SALT PALACE CONVENTION CENTER

SALTLAKEUNITYFEST.COM

Thursday, Dec. 12 • Bowling • Kickoff Party • Foreign Figures

EQUALITY UTAH

education, advocacy, political action

Friday, Dec. 13 Saturday, Dec. 14 • Family Game Night • Pickleball • Bar Bus • Roller Derby • Trivia • Dance Night

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Downtown 32 W 200 S

Sunday, Dec. 15 • Basketball • Swimming • Dodgeball

4 | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE

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Dennis McCracken

Artistic Director

ISSUE 306 | November 21, 2019

staffbox

publisher/editor Michael Aaron

ASSISTANT editor Tony Hobday NATIONAL NEWS editor Craig Ogan designer Christian Allred sales Tony Hobday, 801-997-9763 x1 sales@qsaltlake.com contributors Joshua Adamson Pickett, Diane Anderson-Minshall, Chris Azzopardi, Paul Berge, Jeff Berry, Paul Campbell, Laurie Bennett-Cook, Stephen Dark, Jennifer Dobner, Mikki Enoch, Jack Fertig, Greg Fox, Oriol Gutierrez Jr., Tony Hobday, Ashley Hoyle, Joshua Jones, Christopher Katis, Rock Magen, Sam Mills, Craig Ogan, Mikey Rox, Terri Schlichenmeyer, Gregg Shapiro, Petunia Pap Smear, Steven Petrow, Ed Sikov, JoSelle Vanderhooft, Ben ­Williams, D’Anne ­Witkowski distribution RJ Graham publisher

Q Media Group 222 S Main St, Ste 500 (by appt. only), Salt Lake City, Utah 84101 tel: 801-997-9763

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December 13 & 14, 2019 - 7:30 pm December 15, 2019 - 4:00 pm First Baptist Church, SLC, UT General Admission $20

Tickets are valid for any night, and are available from choir members, Club Try-Angles, and online at brownpapertickets.com

QSaltLake Magazine is a trademark of Salt Lick Publishing, LLC., Q Media Group Copyright © 2019, Salt Lick Publishing, LLC. All rights reserved. No material may be reprinted or reproduced without written permission from the publisher. 8–12,000 copies are distributed free of charge at over 300 locations across the state. Free copies are limited to one per person.

For additional copies, call 801-997-9763. It is a crime to dispose of current issues or otherwise interfere with the distribution of this magazine. Printed locally in the USA on recycled paper. Please recycle this copy when done.

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WHARTON | O’BRIEN

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ISSUE 306

news The top national and world news since last issue you should know

BY CRAIG OGAN

More religious liberty shenanigans National Adoption Month started off on the wrong foot with the U.S. Department of Health and Human Services authorizing adoption agencies affiliated with a religion to deny services to LGBT parents. The proposed regulation ends the policy that prohibited federally funded agencies from discriminating on the basis of sexual orientation and gender identity. The new regulations, though still in the 30-day public comment stage, will go into effect immediately. HHS said the rule “imposed a regulatory burden.”

Other programs that could be affected by the extension of the religious-liberty argument are elder services, Head Start, refugee resettlement, HIV services, and programs for runaways.

Cuomo misgenders himself, maybe?

Chris Cuomo thumbs couldn’t move fast enough on Twitter to apologize for a lame joke about gender pronouns. At the CNN LGBT Forum, Sen. Kamala Harris declared her pronouns as “she, her and hers.” With a twinkle in his eye, Cuomo responded, “She, her and hers? Mine too.” The backlash was swift on Twitter, where, among others, GLAAD tweeted “it was so disappointing” for Cuomo to mock

Harris’ declaration “on such a major stage.”

The National Center for Lesbian Rights, meanwhile, tweeted that “people’s pronouns are not a punchline.”

Cuomo said he was sorry, but in either a syntactical error or a subtle “coming out,” said he should be forgiven because he is “committed to helping us achieve quality.”

UK survey good news, bad news The Annual Hate Crime Report in Great Britain contains a little good news for LGBT people, such as more than 4 in 5 people said that LGBT+ people should be free to live as they wish. Bad news: 18to 24-year-olds hold higher negative views towards LGBT communities than other age groups. And 20 percent of the 1,600 adults polled say LGBT should not be free to live as they wish, with 25 percent of 18 to 24 sharing that view. Ten percent of all people polled said being LGBTQ could be “cured.” Twenty percent of under 25 agreed with a possible cure, compared to 5 percent of those ages 55-65.

Three percent of the older group said LGBT are dangerous with 16 percent of 18 to 24 sniffing danger.

Bi congressperson resigns Katie Hill, elected to U.S. Congress from California, declared her bisexuality as part of her campaign and proved it by having consensual affairs with both male and female campaign and congressional staffers. Her husband, in the middle of a divorce action, released nude photos of her on the internet.

She resigned rather than fight a Congressional Ethics Committee complaint about her staff dalliances. She blamed her troubles on an “abusive ex,”

sexual shaming, the general misogyny of U.S. culture, a broken political system, and the current president.

March On DC, blink and you’ll miss it If you blinked you probably missed the dozen or so individuals who no longer identify as gay or lesbian marching on Washington D.C. to lobby against the Equality Act and the Therapeutic Fraud Act. Sponsored by Church United and a political group named “Changed,” marchers claimed that, “Changing the Civil Rights Act would create a super-class for anyone identifying as LGBTQ at the expense of people who are not.” They argued the Equality Act would provide workplace and housing protections for gender and sexual minorities for “discrimination that does not exist.”

St. Louis fined $20 million How much is “your gayness” worth? To a St. Louis, Missouri police officer, it’s $20 million. The officer sued St. Louis County for job discrimination after he was passed over for promotion because he is a gay man. He said he was told by a member of the county’s Board of Police Commissioners that his sexuality was holding him back and he’d have to change to advance, “If you ever want to see a white shirt [get a promotion], you should tone down your gayness.”

He filed a complaint with the feds and then sued. The jury awarded him $20 million.

“We wanted to send a message,” the jury foreman said.

“If you discriminate you are going to pay a big price.”

Male couples dance on TV competitions The USA’s Dancing with the Stars, serves up Sean Spicer in a cabana shirt and gay men

dancing their little hearts out with C-list starlets.

The BBC in the United Kingdom serves up two hot guys dancing while vocalist Emeli Sande belts one out on Strictly Come Dancing. One of the men, professional dancer Johannes Radebe a from South Africa is gay and the other, Graziano di Prima, is straight, but it was a hot 3.5 minutes.

After the show, Radebe posted photos with the comment “Love knows no boundaries.” Di Palma, like most “Hets” reaction to their first time with a gay man, tweeted, “Unforgettable moment.”

In Denmark, Jakob Fauerby and Silas Holst are making history with their appearance together on Vild med Dans, Denmark TV’s version of the DWTS franchise. They are the first same-sex couple in the show’s history and have scored the highest points in four out of eight episodes.

‘Queer Eye’ star mobbed Speaking of Dancing with the Stars, last summer, Queer Eye star Karamo Brown was cast with former presidential spokesperson Sean Spicer.

Brown said some nice things about Spicer, even using the word “friendship” in People magazine. That was enough to spur the “outraged mob” to flood Brown’s social media with sobs of, “How dare you?”

The mobbing was so bad he deactivated his Twitter account.

The bullying worked, though. In a recent interview, Brown took it all back saying, “There was no friendship. I was just saying that if we’re going to be on the same show, I’m going to have a respectful conversation with someone who’s different from me.”

Brown was voted off the show, but Spicer continues to dance, albeit, Brown says, “rhythmically challenged.”

8 | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | NEWS

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ISSUE 306 | November 21, 2019

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New HIV strain identified

U.S. scientists at Abbott Laboratories identified HIV-1 Group M, sub-type L, the first new strain since 2000. Abbot says, “Group M viruses are responsible for the global pandemic, which can be traced back to the Democratic Republic of Congo in Sub-Saharan Africa. We must continue to outthink this continuously changing virus.” Dr. Anthony Fauci, director of the National Institute of Allergy and Infectious Diseases, says existing medication is effective against this strain and others.

Porn awards called homophobic Nick Fitt and Clark Davis, two performers in gay porn for the world’s number one internet trafficked site, PornHub, walked out of the website’s awards ceremony in LA. In a “first world problem whine,”

they tweeted that they weren’t allowed to walk the red carpet and had general admission seating, calling the ceremony, “the most homophobic experience of [their] lives.” They also claimed winners in gay categories weren’t allowed to accept onstage, saying, with no sense of irony, that gay performers received their awards in the “fucking trophy room.”

PornHub replied that red carpet walks were cut short as the line was very long and the show needed to start and “half of all category winners accepted their awards on stage. The other half and fan awards were called out on stage and received in the lounge. They included straight and gay winners.”

Illinois school rejects Harvey Milk?

Noted children’s author Robin Stevenson was scheduled to visit an Illinois elementary

school. Her latest book, Kid Activists, explores the childhoods of 16 activists, including Frederick Douglass, Martin Luther King, Jr., Autumn Peltier, and Helen Keller.

However, she was disinvited because the book’s cover features a cartoon Harvey Milk waving a rainbow flag.

nies for same-sex couples. The Notorious RGB and the famed softball catcher did not.

Fabulous impeachment inquiry hearing coverage What turned out to be the most exciting thing about the opening of public hearings for the House of Representatives’ impeachment inquiry was the appearance of Pissi Myles, a New Jersey-based drag queen.

Reporting for the streaming channel Happs News, she wrote, “It’s a crazy day in Washington!

I’m flipping my wig over the high-energy proceedings today. Tensions are high, and the bar for who’s allowed in the Longworth House is very, very low.” Q

J ’Accuse, recuse, Alito and Kavanaugh told Supreme Court Justices Brett Kavanaugh and Samuel Alito have been asked to recuse themselves from LGBTQ rights cases after the publication of a photo of them with the president of the putatively anti-LGBT National Organization for Marriage, Brian Brown.

In 2015, the American Family Association asked that Ruth Bader Ginsburg and Elena Kagan recuse themselves from a case because both had officiated marriage ceremo-

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10 | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | NEWS

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ISSUE 306 | November 21, 2019

Unity Fest: 7 sports, 4 days, 1 city

BY MICHAEL AARON

Michelle McCardell has been mulling the idea of a sports festival in Utah for a few years now. Then, the story of a man whose plans for his life were destroyed when he was outed in high school cemented McCardell’s decision to move forward.

“I spoke to a gentleman from New York and he told his story about being a competitive tennis player in high school with college scholarship offers,” McCardell explains. “He was ‘outed’ and harassed so much that he quit participating in the only sport that he really loved.”

“He became so depressed and suicidal that he didn’t go to college for a few years because he just couldn’t bring himself to pay for an education that he should have had under a tennis scholarship,” she continued. “Fortunately, he stumbled across an LGBTQ+ sports league in his community, got back into playing tennis and is now happy.”

His story seemed foreign to McCardell.

“As a lesbian in Salt Lake, I couldn’t imagine that happening. I have always felt so safe and fearless; I was never an incredible athlete, but always felt welcome to participate in any sporting event. It was incredibly sad to listen to his story,” she said. “That was truly the moment that I felt like the idea of starting a sports festival in Salt Lake would be a great opportunity to show off how progressive and accepting our beautiful city is and that we would welcome anyone and everyone to participate in the Salt Lake Unity Fest.”

This year, the inaugural Unity Fest will take place at the Salt Palace Convention Center and locations across the valley.

FOUR-DAY FESTIVAL The Salt Lake Unity Fest is a multi-day festival uniting the LGBTQ+ community and allies through sports while highlighting the urban amenities of Salt Lake.

Organizers McCardell, Heather Simon, and Kyle Manwaring want this event to be a safe environment for everyone to participate.

“We hope to bring people from all

over the world to compete in this annual sports festival, stay in Salt Lake, ski, shop, and enjoy our amazing state,” said Simon.

“We also want to give back by donating money back to our local LGBTQ+ community,” explained Manwaring.

“We hope to have over 250 people participating in at least one of the sports this year,” McCardell said. “But we would love to see over 2,000 come through the doors to hear the opening band, Foreign Figures, perform.”

SPORTS For its first year, the organizers chose seven varied sports categories in which people can compete, including roller derby, basketball, bowling, dodgeball, pickleball, and swimming.

For those perhaps more skilled in the mind than body, there is a trivia competition as well.

Organizers teamed up with local sports groups Stonewall Sports Salt Lake, QUAC Aquatic Club, and Wasatch Roller Derby for many of the sports.

COMMUNITY EVENTS At the Salt Palace, Unity Fest will have a vendor area and lounge with food and beer each night.

The KICKOFF PARTY, at which Oremborn band FOREIGN FIGURES will perform, will raise money to be donated to local LGBTQ+ organizations including Encircle, Stonewall Sports, and the Utah Pride Center.

Foreign Figures released a single this year, “Jank”, which rounds out their sixsong EP released last year, Overzealous.

Salt Lake City Mayor Jackie Biskupski will welcome Unity Fest guests to the city, followed by dance, music, and art performances by local LGBTQ+ talent.

There will also be raffle giveaways and prize drawings.

“We would love to see the community come out to support this event and have a great time,” Manwaring said.

On Friday night, a FAMILY GAME NIGHT with drag performers and an ugly sweater contest, as well as a BAR BUS

will take place.

A DANCE PARTY will be hosted by DJ Pauley on Saturday night.

Spectators are also welcome at most of the sports competitions.

SPONSORS AND VOLUNTEERS Unity Fest needs additional volunteers and sponsors to make the event possible.

Those interested can email contact@ saltlakeunityfest.com

Schedule Events at the Salt Palace unless otherwise noted.

Subject to change. See SaltLakeUnityFest.com.

THURSDAY, DEC. 12 Bowling at Bonwood Bowl Kickoff party with Mayor Jackie Biskupski and Foreign Figures band

FRIDAY, DEC. 13 Family Game Night Bar Bus

SATURDAY, DEC. 14 Pickleball Roller Derby Trivia Dance Night

SUNDAY, DEC. 15 Basketball Swimming Meet at Fairmont Aquatic Ctr Dodgeball More information about Unity Fest can be found at ­SaltLakeUnityFest.com, on Facebook and Instagram @saltlakeunityfest and Twitter @slunityfest.

NOVEMBER 21, 2019 |

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ISSUE 306 | Qsaltlake.com

Grindr/Scruff scam targets gay men in Salt Lake City

Project Rainbow places 283 flags ahead of Transgender Day of Remembrance Project Rainbow, the group who places LGBTQ-related flags through the year across the state of Utah to raise funds for local charities, placed 283 transgender flags at Salt Lake City Hall — one for each transgender person known to have lost their lives to transphobic violence in the past year.

Transgender Day of Rememberance happens each November 20 across the world to memorialize those lost. This year, Utah’s TDOR, sponsored by TEA of Utah and the Utah Pride Center, will be held at the Utah State Capitol Building. It will also be live streamed via Facebook by Equality Utah.

Many people know some of the dangers when using Grindr, Scruff, and similar apps as we hear stories of men being attacked or robbed. But the apps are now being used to extort money.

A Utah man called QSaltLake Magazine looking for a resource to help him after he received a threatening call demanding money.

The man had chatted with a user on Scruff who was purportedly 21 years of age, according to his profile. The two exchanged messages and photos on the app, and took their conversation to text messages, but did not meet.

The next morning, someone claiming to be the father of the person he was chatting with called the man and told him that he was actually chatting with his 15-year-old son. Further, he said his son attempted suicide after the interactions and demanded $2,200 for the hospital bills.

He said he would go to the

police and tell them he was exchanging sexual images and messages with a minor if he did not pay.

When the Utah man called QSaltLake, he was told to call Chris Wharton of Wharton O’Brien PLLC, who specializes in legal issues in the LGBTQ community.

Wharton explained to him that this was a scam being seen across the country. He told him to block the profile on the Scruff app, block the phone number that the man had called from, and completely disengage from the conversation.

Some victims of these scams are being approached in person with demands for payment.

Anyone in this situation should call an attorney. Any further contact with the scammer should be referred to the attorney and under no circumstance should the scammers be given any money. Q

from 6-9 p.m.

The Red Party 2019 will be a ‘RED’iculous fundraising event where UAF encourages guests to have fun, let loose and celebrate unity. Like the name, UAF wants to encourage our guests to wear red. Be creative. Be brave. Be fun!

It’s an evening of hors d’oeuvres, music, dancing, a silent auction and entertainment.

UofU campus, once again brings its annual Day With(out) Art ’19: Together, Healthy, Proud event on Wed., Dec. 4.

The evening includes making textile art — inspired by the AIDS Quilt — experimental live music by It foot, It ears, guided gallery exploration, resource tables, refreshments, and more. The museum will conceal Viola Frey’s Ethnic Man (1991) to recognize Day With(out) Art among over 800 participating art organizations.

Attorneys who work with the LGBTQ community can be found at qpages.com/ cat/attorneys/.

World AIDS Day events in Utah The theme for the 2019 national observance World AIDS Day is “Ending the HIV/AIDS Epidemic: Community by Community”.

World AIDS Day was first observed in 1988. Each year, organizations and individuals across the world bring attention to the HIV epidemic, endeavor to increase HIV awareness and knowledge, speak out against HIV stigma, and call for an increased response to move toward ending the HIV epidemic.

Here in Utah, this year’s theme for World AIDS Day recognizes the vital role of communities in supporting and educating at a local level, helping to deliver services at

a regional level and raising awareness at a global level.

For the research that investigates how to harness community power to reduce transmission of HIV and improve the well-being of people living with HIV/AIDS, visit the ISRCTN registry at isrctn.com

RED PARTY The Utah AIDS Foundation, in partnership with University of Utah Health, brings the annual Red Party that raises thousands of dollars each year for AIDS research and hospice. This year, on Thursday, Dec. 5, the Red Party will be held at Jaden Event Center at Trolley Square in downtown Salt Lake City

Info at bit.ly/uafredparty2019

DAY WITH(OUT) ART Also in recognition or World AIDS Day, the Utah Museum of Fine Arts, located on the

Info at umfa.utah.edu/node/492

12 | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | NEWS

Qsaltlake.com |

Trans woman forced to remove makeup at Utah DMV against department policy A transgender Utah resident was taken aback when after having her driver license photo renewal taken at the Fairpark Driver License Office, a supervisor engaged her with “hostility,” demanding that she remove her makeup for the license photo.

“Because my appearance didn’t match my gender, it wouldn’t be able to be picked up by face recognition Jaydee Dolinar, via Facebook software,” the victim Jaydee Dolinar said of what the supervisor told her.

Dolinar explained to Fox13 News that the supervisor cited state policy in her reasoning. When Dolinar asked what the policy stated, she said the woman shrugged her shoulders and told her they

can’t “have confusion in the system.”

Jaydee asked the supervisor what she should do.

“She said, ‘Well, we have hand sanitizer you can use,’” Dolinar said. “Like, alright… so I used the hand sanitizer and paper towels and I scrubbed it all off.”

Chris Caras, Director of the Utah Department of Public Safety Driver License Division, explained to Fox13 News that they learned about the complaint the following day.

Caras clarified that the policy is meant for makeup that is extreme in nature, or a material change that would alter a person’s appearance in a way that could complicate a photo ID from previous photos, or to facilitate some type of fraud.

“We obviously would not want anything like this to happen in one of our offices ever again,” Caras said.

DPS stated that additional training would take place in partnership with TEA of Utah.

Qmmunity Utah Pride Center: The Pastor Is In On the 1st and 3rd Thursday of each month the UPC hosts a local pastor (Rev. Curtis Price, of the First Baptist Church) will be on location in the Center’s lobby 6–8 p.m., for open to conversation with anyone who would like to talk about religion. Price has long been an ally to the LGBTQIA+ community and a partner with the UPC as well.

Anyone who wants to ask questions, work through feelings, laugh/cry/be angry on the subject of religion is welcome to sit with him, or gather his information to make an appointment for a more private conversation if they prefer.

Upcoming Dates: Thurs., Nov. 21; Mon., Dec. 5; and Thurs.; Dec. 19. , 1380 S. Main St.

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The Royal Court of the Golden Spike Empire’s Prince Royale XLIV Kolton Riley and Princess Royale XLIV Sandi Panties From Hell present Snowball 2019: Christmas in New York. Each year, the RCGSE’s Prince and Princess Royale throw a Snowball Gala

ISSUE 306 | November 21, 2019

to raise proceeds to benefit those in the community who are living with HIV/AIDS. All funds from this gala will go directly to recipients, which helps them in purchasing much needed medications, food, clothes, housing during the holidays.

Snowball 2019 commences on AIDS Awareness Day, Sunday, Dec. 1, at the Rose Wagner Performing Arts Center, 138 W. 300 South. Doors and dinner at 4 p.m., with the spectacular show at 6 p.m. Tickets are $25, available through artsaltlake.org.

Lecture: The ‘Born This Way’ Wars: Sexuality, Science and the Future of Equality On Thursday, Dec. 5, Westminster College’s B. W. Bastian Foundation Diversity Series presents “The ‘Born This Way’ Wars: Sexuality, Science and the Future of Equality” with Patrick Grzanka, Ph.D., a professor of psychology and women, gender and sexuality studies at The University of Tennessee.

In this lecture, he will discuss the social implications of scientists’ search for the biological origins of sexual orientation. An expert in intersectionality, Grzanka’s work broadly investigates the psychosocial consequences of complex structural inequalities at the nexus of race, gender and sexuality.

This free lecture will be held in the Bill and Vieve Gore Business School Auditorium, 1840 S. 1300 East, at 7 p.m., followed by a book signing at 8:15 p.m.

LGBTQ Utah author book reading and signing Utah author and member of the LGBT community Rachel Anne Cox, will be at the Main Street Emporium, 66 S. Main St., Bountiful, for a reading and book signing of her debut dystopian novel A Light From The Ashes, on Saturday, Nov. 23, 4:30-6 p.m.

The novel is set in the future wasteland of Virginia where Sam, the son of revolutionaries, wants nothing more than to leave the violence of his past behind him, but the impending Third Revolution and the two women he loves may not let him. With his loyalties torn between his affection for Sophie and maintaining the tentative peace which has prevailed in the land, Sam must navigate the fine lines between peace and rebellion, love and hate, while trying to find his humanity in an inhumane world and within himself.

To learn more about the author, visit her on at instagr.am/rachel_anne_cox_writer/ or fb.me/rachelannecoxwriter/ Q

NOVEMBER 21, 2019 |

ISSUE 306 | Qsaltlake.com

ask mr. manners

VIEWS | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | 13

Holiday savings

BY ROCK MAGEN

It’s the

holidays, and once again time to start selecting the perfect gifts to give away to loved ones.

As much as we don’t necessarily want to think about the price tags associated with those perfect gifts, it may be time to set your strategy. You don’t want to be that person who overspent your Christmas budget last year and didn’t pay off your Christmas bills until Easter!

Here are five things I have found helpful when trying to hang on to more green and keep you out of the red during the holiday season.

MAKE A LIST Don’t dismiss this perennial piece of advice as too simplistic. Writing down which stores you’ll visit and which gifts you plan to buy helps focus your shopping excursion and makes the chore more pleasant because you don’t get caught up in holiday hysteria. And need I point out that you’ll spend less money than if you rush from store to store snapping up “bargains” on a whim!

THINK OUTSIDE THE GIFT BOX Plenty of alternatives are less expensive, and more fun, than buying a gift for every sibling, in-law, niece, and nephew.

Instead, have a family gift exchange in which you each choose one name and put more thought than money into selecting a single gift.

COUNT YOUR PENNIES A few weeks ago I was waiting for my sandwich in a deli around the corner from my office. When I bent down to pick up a dime from the floor, a gentleman standing next to me struck up a conversation. He told me he always picks up coins (even pennies) and tosses them into a big jar, along with the change from

his pockets every day. That’s the money he uses to buy his holiday gifts — and every year it adds up to between $900 and $1,100!

Regardless of the tactics you use when selecting your gifts, what is important about the holidays is spending time with those that we love. While it can be exciting to open a shiny new package, I find it ironic that some of the best gifts I have ever received did not come with a bow.

As you are selecting gifts for your loved ones, it is incredibly important to treasure the time you spend with them. I hope that you each have a great holiday, and I look forward to catching up in the New Year. Q

KEEP A RUNNING TALLY OF YOUR CREDIT-CARD SPENDING When you come home from a day of shopping, immediately subtract what you’ve spent from your checking-account balance. Not only does that give you a visual record of how much you’ve spent, but also it ensures that you’ll have enough money in the account to pay the bill in full when it arrives.

PAY CASH No, that’s not hopelessly old-fashioned.

Recently I heard a podcast where the host shared that for the holidays, they always pay in cash, preferably $100 bills.

The bank teller may look at you strangely when you ask for hundreds, but it makes you think twice when you go to buy something. You really don’t want to break a Benjamin!

Know who WANTS your business and will treat you with the DIGNITY and RESPECT you deserve

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ISSUE 306 | November 21, 2019

quotes “Christmas will always be as long as we stand heart to heart and hand in hand.”

— Dr. Suess

“I worked for a big department store, and strangely, on my first day, they put me in charge of Christmas wrapping.

I didn’t know how to wrap a present and make it not look like it fell off a truck.”

— Joel Edgerton

“No matter what, I always make it home for Christmas.

I love to go to my Tennessee Mountain Home and invite all of my nieces and nephews and their spouses and kids and do what we all like to do — eat, laugh, trade presents and just enjoy each other… and sometimes I even dress up like Santa Claus!”

— Dolly Parton

“On the morning, Daddy and I get up at six o’clock because Christmas trees must be bought in the dark. We walk to the other end of town, as the big harbour is just the right setting for buying a Christmas tree. We spend hours choosing, looking at every branch suspiciously. It’s always cold.”

— author Tove Jansson

“I’m bad on Valentine’s Day, but even worse on Christmas.

I go shopping at nine o’clock on December 24th every year.

Nobody else is there. I’m in Toys’R’Us all by myself. I get there five minutes before closing. ” — Jamie Foxx

“Christmas is a stocking stuffed full of sugary goodness.”

— Mo Rocca

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guest editorial

Hallmark, Lifetime, the gay question

BY MARK SEGAL

Like me,

I’m sure you’re beginning to think about the holidays. The Hallmark Channel and Lifetime are already running holiday romance movies 24/7. This year, not only do they have holiday movies for the black community, they even have one that has a Jewish storyline. Wonder if they have a Chanukah bush? These new movies are an attempt to be diverse and inclusive.

So, Hallmark and Lifetime, how long are we going to have to wait for that LGBT holiday romance movie? After all, the channels produce at least 32 new movies each for the holiday extravaganza — 64 films between the two. Netflix, Amazon Prime, Apple TV, and other streaming services also add to the holiday-movie producing spectacle with many of their own. We don’t exist, but we should since the demographics, ratings and advertising dollars for LGBT shows are already there.

GLAAD, which serves as the leading authority and watchdog of media for the LGBT community, recently reported in their Where We Are on TV Report, “Broadcast television exceeds GLAAD Challenge in just one year as the percentage of LGBTQ series regulars reaches an all-time high.” Take a look at how well LGBT characters are doing on TV. Is there any question that the gay couple on Modern Family is why that show has high ratings?

Same for Will & Grace. In daytime, Ellen is queen. There’s nothing that controversial about LGBT characters on TV any longer. Even in the news divisions, Rachel Maddow is the ratings queen of news, while all TV networks and cable news outlets have LGBT reporters.

And what’s up with all the gay male meteorologists?

At the movies, the money is rolling in — three movies last year with major LGBT characters made over $100 million at the box office. Universal even has a program to increase LGBT participation on screen and behind the camera.

Hallmark and Lifetime movies are so formulated that plotlines show the difference between the two channels.

On Hallmark, a couple meets, begins to fall in love, and each person knows that they’re perfect for the other; then, a dramatic moment when the two are about to have their first kiss is interrupted by someone.

In the end, the audience has to wait until the last scene to have that first kiss. On Lifetime, the first kiss comes at about the 90-minute mark, and more of the storyline follows.

Which demographics are waiting breathlessly for those kisses?

Women and gay men. So ratings won’t be hurt. The competition to witness the first gay kiss will most likely make it a hit. As for advertisers, they’re already there.

Can you imagine Target, to name one, pulling their Hallmark advertising budget over a gay kiss?

The reality is new advertisers want to be in on the event, and even if not, the backlash would be too much to overcome.

The formula you have, we all love, and it will work just as well for a gay couple. We can wait 90 minutes for a first kiss.

We can even wait two hours, as long as it’s between people like us. So, Hallmark, Lifetime: How about a gay Christmas in 2020? Q Mark Segal, PGN publisher, is the nation’s most-award-winning commentator in LGBT media.

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ISSUE 306 | November 21, 2019

who’s your daddy

Give and receive

BY CHRISTOPHER KATIS

Santa is

busy making his list and checking it twice but let’s be honest, how many people do you know are going to be on the “Nice List”? Looks like it’s up to you to make the holidays bright. Not to worry — Who’s Your Daddy has your back with some great gift ideas for the LGBTQ parents and their rug rats in your life.

As far as I’m concerned, you can’t go wrong with giving books! There are some great new (and old) titles specifically for gay parents and their kids.

For the little ones in your life, consider The GayBCs by M.L. Webb, in which kids will learn that “A” is for ally, “D” stands for drag, and “N” is for non-binary.

Meanwhile, Jessica Love’s Julián is a Mermaid is the delightful story of a little boy that wants to transform into something beautiful.

For the young activist try Kid Activists: True Tales of Childhood from Champions of Change by Robin Stevenson, Queer Heroes: Meet 53 LGBTQ Heroes from Past and Present by Arabelle Sicardi, or books about queer history from Rob Sanders — Pride: The Story of Harvey Milk and the

Rainbow Flag and Stonewall: A Building, an Uprising, a Revolution. Hey, why not both?

Cool tweens will enjoy The Misadventures of the Family Fletcher by Dana Alison Levy. This series focuses on the adventures and antics of a couple of brothers, who just happen to have a dad and papa!

For the adults, you can always pick up one of these great books: Pride and Joy: A Guide for Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual and Trans Parents by Rachel and Sara Hagger-Holt, Love Makes a Family by Gigi Kaeser, The Kid by Dan Savage, or Confessions of the Other Mother: Non-Biological Lesbian Moms Tell All by Harlyn Aizley.

All these books are available at THE KING’S ENGLISH BOOKSHOP — if you don’t see it on the shelf, they’ll be glad to order it for you.

Looking for a great stocking stuffer?

Check out the offerings at CaféPress or Etsy. They have several terrific coffee mugs that any gay parent would enjoy.

Among my favorites are the snarky “Jesus Had Two Dads” and “World’s Gayest Dad.” I also love the inspiring “I Support

Holiday Social an evening to celebrate our members

WEDNESDAY, DEC. 4, 6–8 PM SUN TRAPP, 102 S 600 WEST

My Transgender Grandsondaughter” option.

Both sites also offer some cute clothing options as well. What kid wouldn’t be a hit in a T-shirt announcing “Before you ask, they are BOTH my real moms” and “Ain’t No Mamas Like the Ones I Got”? With a wink to the great Dr. Seuss characters, there are also grown-up shirts declaring “Dad 1/Dad 2.” And for the mom-to-be, how about the clever maternity top announcing “Wife, Wife, Baby”?

Thinking outside of the traditional gift box, you can always get your favorite daddies or mommies a subscription to Gay Parent Magazine, a national publication focused on supporting and empowering LGBTQ parents and those wishing to become parents. You can get a subscription at gayparentmag.com. (In full transparency, I’ve written for them.)

Another great option is to donate to important organizations like the Family Equality Council, a non-profit whose mission is to advance the rights of LGBTQ familiesfamilyequality.org/ donate, or COLAGE, which works to help LGBTQ parents become skilled, self-confident and just leaders in the community colage.org/donate/.

Together they co-host Family Week, a week-long event of fun and programs for families like mine.

I don’t know which of Santa’s lists you’ll be on, but clearly I’m on the pre-approved Nice List — I already received an early holiday gift courtesy of QSaltLake readers: my third FABBY for Best Columnist! Thank you to everyone who voted, I am honored and humbled.

Happy Holidays, everyone! Q

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ISSUE 306 | Qsaltlake.com

creep of the week

Civility

BY D’ANNE WITKOWSKI

Once upon a

time there was a president so unpopular with and loathed by the American people that on the same day he announced the killing of ISIS leader Abu Bakr al-Baghdadi he was booed when he showed up at the World Series.

That was, of course, Donald Trump.

Keep in mind that Trump doesn’t make impromptu appearances. He prefers rallies filled with supporters and carefully scripted interactions. He surrounds himself with yes men and yes women.

So when his name was announced at the World Series game, he was all smiles at first, waving at the crowd.

But it quickly dawned on him that people weren’t cheering, they were booing.

And the look on his face changed to a pout, his shoulders slumped. Some videos of the occasion you can hear crowd members yelling, “Lock him up!”

It’s a beautiful thing.

Watch the video. It’ll give you joy. Or it’ll make you clutch your pearls and launch into a lecture about civility.

Take “Morning Joe’s” Joe Scarborough, for example.

“We are Americans and we do not do that,” Scarborough said. “We do not want the world hearing us chant ‘lock him up’ to this president or to any president.”

And then there was Nate

Silver who whined on Twitter that liberals were mean and couldn’t let Trump have one good thing. How dare they boo him on a day when the military killed a bad guy?

Some Democrats were upset, too.

“I have a hard time with the idea of a crowd on a globally televised sporting event chanting ‘lock him up’ about our President,” Delaware Sen. Chris Coons said on CNN. “I frankly think the office of the President deserves respect, even when the actions of our President at times don’t.”

There are plenty more examples of people aghast that the American people would be so uncivil.

And you know what I have to say about that? Fuck civility. What we have is a lawless leader who has been accused of so many crimes it’s hard to keep track, but it’s never far from my mind that he is an accused rapist and sexual assaulter. Booing him is the least people can do.

Booing him at a baseball game isn’t disrespecting the office of the President. It’s expressing loudly, and in the only way Trump can understand, that we do not approve of what Trump is doing and that this man doesn’t represent us. It’s expressing that the office of the President should be occupied by a person who deserves and is qualified to be there.

It’s not sending the wrong

signal to the rest of the world. Someone on Twitter complained that as a result of the booing “our enemies are laughing at us,” as if our enemies didn’t know that millions of Americans voted for this unfit reality TV star garbage monster and our Electoral College rules made him the president. If anything, booing him at a public appearance is sending exactly the right message to the rest of the world: “We hate this guy and wish he wasn’t president!”

As for chanting “lock him up,” it’s not a bloodthirsty chant for revenge, it’s turning the language of his supporters against him as a way to say, “Hey, nobody in the U.S. is supposed to be above the law!” Also, it’s important to note that the people at the baseball game were chanting this about a sitting president who is accused of actual crimes and is facing impeachment. When Trump encouraged his supporters to chant the same thing it was directed at his political opponent. There’s a goddamn difference.

As for not letting Trump bask in a glow of adoration for the ISIS operation, baseball fans didn’t take that from him. Trump took that away from himself. You can’t take kids away and lock them in cages, lie more often than you tell the truth, praise murderous dictators, fuel and refuse to condemn

white supremacist violence, continually threaten to take away access to health care from millions of Americans, declare mainstream media the “enemy of the people” — not to mention his administrations countless attacks on LGBTQ people, immigrants, asylum seekers, women, students and the poor — and expect people to forget all of that (and more!) when you do something that might be praiseworthy.

There are those who bemoan the crassness of political discourse and note that the bar for what is appropriate has been lowered a great deal in the last few years.

And Trump has been rightly blamed for lowering that bar.

Some say we shouldn’t boo Trump because that is stooping to his level. But I’d like to remind those people that this small-minded and cruel man, this man who sees himself as a king and has no respect for American institutions and laws, is the president. We created and cannot control this monster. The only power we have is our vote and our dissent, whether that’s booing, or putting a “Tuck Frump” sticker on our car, or wearing an “Impeach the Motherfucker” T-shirt, and we’re going to use it. Q D’Anne Witkowski is a poet, writer and comedian living in Michigan with her wife and son. She has been writing about LGBT politics for over a decade. Follow her on Twitter @MamaDWitkowski.

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ISSUE 306 | November 21, 2019

lambda lore

40 years of KRCL

BY BEN WILLIAMS

December

3 will mark the 40th anniversary of “Listener Community Radio,” KRCL FM 91, broadcasting over the airwaves of Salt Lake City. All thanks to a civil-rights worker, anti-Vietnam war leader, politician, environmentalist, and gay man named Stephen Holbrook.

KRCL had been on for little more than six years when sitting alone at my work cubicle, I first heard a woman’s deep, throaty melodious voice say, “If you are, or know or love someone gay or lesbian, the next half hour will be informative as well as entertaining.” I nearly peed my pants. I had just discovered this funky station calling itself “Radio Free Utah” a few days before.

It touted itself as being the voice behind the Zion Curtain

but I was mostly intrigued by its mix of eclectic music and liberal news programming which I discovered while channel surfing.

On that day as I was listening, unsuspecting that my world was soon to be turned upside down, this program came on calling itself “Concerning Gays and Lesbians.”

I jumped out of my swivel chair and quickly turned the volume way down low, only audible enough for me to hear the salacious and audacious program. By the end of the program, I was a changed man. I realized for the first time that there were gays, other than me, in the city; enough to warrant a local program.

The woman calling herself Mickey read a series of phone numbers and I quickly

scrawled out the numbers and tucked them into my pants pocket. Miraculously this little half-hour program gave me the courage, the resolve and the hope to live a more authentic life.

How in the world did a weekly program dedicated to local gay and lesbian events happen in Salt Lake City of all places! It began with a vision by a gay social activist named Stephen Holbrook.

Holbrook started out as your typical Bountiful young Mormon Republican; however, he came from an old, well-connected Mormon family. As expected, he served an LDS mission and was sent to Hong Kong and Chinatown in San Francisco. There, stark poverty among the Chinese profoundly affected him. It became the foundation for his belief that “Democracy cannot function if some groups have far more and other groups have far less.”

Holbrook left his mission and quit the LDS Church.

At home in Utah, Holbrook’s sense of social justice made him astutely aware of the racial discrimination that existed as mixed-race marriages were illegal and African Americans were not allowed to purchase certain real estate properties. However, still as a Republican, the 21-yearold went to work for Utah’s Congressman Sherman Lloyd in Washington. While there Holbrook was given permission by the congressman to attend the March on Washington for Jobs and Freedom in 1963. He heard Martin Luther King famously state that he had a dream. And now so did Holbrook.

However, an aide to Lloyd said that Holbrook could either work for the congressman or for civil rights but he couldn’t do both. For Hol-

brook, it was an easy decision.

He chose to join the Salt Lake branch of the National Association for the Advancement of Colored People and soon found himself within the year registering blacks to vote in the deep South.

During the summers of 1964 and 1965, Holbrook campaigned for voter registration in the South along with other Freedom Riders, helped by his friend and progressive, Robert Freed, then owner of Lagoon amusement park. Freed actually paid Holbrook expenses to Mississippi and also was responsible for the desegregation of Lagoon. Freed abolished its former policy of prohibiting blacks to swim or dance at the park.

While in Mississippi, Holbrook worked in the office of Charles Evers, the brother of the murdered civil rights leader Medgar Evers. It was an intense time, where thousands were arrested and over 50 black churches were bombed or burned to the ground. In 1964 at the age of 23, while helping two black women register to vote, Holbrook, himself was arrested. His crime; taking a picture of a water fountain with a sign stating “Whites Only.”

Thrown into a cell called a “hot box”, Holbrook spent time there sweltering in the summer heat and humidity.

The jailers also turned on the actual cell heater to increase his misery. Eventually, Holbrook was freed after a group of Jewish people from New York and officials from Utah raised the money for bail.

Back in Utah, the headlines read “Utah Junior Arrested in Mississippi.”

Upon his return to Utah, Holbrook continued to work for civil rights, including campaigning to persuade the

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LDS church to support civil rights as a moral issue even though the church prohibited African Americans from holding the priesthood.

However, as the war in Indochina escalated, Holbrook soon became a leader in Utah’s major anti-Vietnam War movement called the United Front to End the War. The United Front held marches, protests, sit-down strikes and War Moratorium rallies until 1971. Even early members of Utah’s Gay Liberation Front participated with the United Front to end the war.

During the course of its existence, over 5,000 people participated in the moratoriums and other major events sponsored by the United Front, thanks to his efforts.

One of these events was organizing Utah’s first Earth Day in 1970 at Sugar House Park.

At the age of 29, Holbrook began to work within the system and he ran for the office of Salt Lake City Commissioner to represent students and the impoverished of the city.

While he lost, from 1971 to 1973 he was the chairman to the Advisory Committee on Housing and lobbied the Utah State Legislature for Utah’s first for low-income housing.

In 1972, Holbrook was a delegate to the Democratic National Convention and then he ran and won a seat in Utah’s House of Representatives as a Democrat. As a left-leaning elected legislator, newspaper reporters loved to comment on the length of Holbrook’s hair and how Holbrook was the first man to have a beard in Utah’s legislature since 1896. Despite his appearance or because of it, he was elected to the legislature for three terms, during which Holbrook successfully helped raise money for Utah’s first

homeless shelter and was the primary mover of reform of the juvenile justice system.

Because much of Holbrook’s social-justice activism involved interacting with the news media, he found that much of Utah’s media outlets were unwilling to cover local dissenting opinions and anti-establishment news.

In 1974, he then began a five-year effort to open a nonprofit community radio station which culminated with KRCL 91 FM airing in 1979.

Among Holbrook’s vision for the new station was always to include local programming for minorities, including gays and lesbians. Holbrook chose not to seek re-election for a fourth term in 1980 because he was working as the station’s first general manager.

In 1979, KRCL’s first GLBT program was an hour-long show called “Gayjavu.” The program evolved over the next few years into “Concerning Gays and Lesbians” which was one of the nation’s longest, (if indeed not the longest) continuous local gay and lesbian radio program in the nation.

Becky Moss, first using the alias of “Mickey Moss”, was the producer of the show from 1982 to 2003. During the course of “Concerning Gays and Lesbians,” Moss had had many co-hosts; among them, Mel Baker, Erik Meyers, Beauchaine, Dan Fahndrich, Jeff Freedman, Jim Rieger, Debbie Rosenberg, and Ben Williams.

Disappointingly, as of now, KRCL has not kept its commitment to have local GLBT programming. With the end of Troy Williams’ RadioActive segment, the vision of Stephen Holbrook is now left unrealized. Q

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ISSUE 306 | November 21, 2019

Mikey Rox’s Ultimate Guide to Gay Gift Giving 2019

BY MIKEY ROX

Gifts

galore for him, her, they, and them — because secular Santa doesn’t discriminate like hypocrite “Christians” do.

Budsies Selfie and Petsies Dolls Lookalike dolls made to order from submitted photographs of your human and pet pals are stuffed with so much holiday cheer that this thoughtful treasure will be cherished for years to come. Ideal for drag queens that have everything but this. $99, budsies.com; $59–199, mypetsies.com

Bluprint Subscription Kick-start your secret Santa’s side hustle with Bluprint — NBCUniversal’s digital subscription service that offers classes, projects, and supplies across 20-plus crafting hobbies, like quilting, knitting, embroidery, and crochet — that can easily transform a creative procrastinator into a weekend money maker. $8–200, mybluprint.com

OurShelves Children’s Book Box Guncles and lesbi-aunts will be bedtime-story superstars when they deliver this quarterly subscription box filled with racially and ethically diverse children’s books featuring LGBTQ, feminist, and other traditionally under-represented characters and families. $20–70, ourshelves.com

Kimball Quero Boots Step up your partner’s foot-fashion game with these ruggedly constructed wingtip boots featuring mixed leather and rubber for a no-slip stride that are as dapper as they are ‘damn, boy — you lookin’ fiiine!’ $245–255, querohms.com

this killer-cozy bed that’s totally fin-tastic. $85, thecatball.com

The 5 O’Clock Box & Tom of Finland Vodka In these three-step kits — available in sparkling rosé, spiced Old Fashioned, smoky margarita, and Moscow mule — all 5-o’clock-somewhere-ers have to do is add alcohol (like Tom of Finland vodka), shake or stir, and garnish to get tipsier than a freshly cut Tannenbaum. $30, twistyourspirits.com; $35, ­tomoffinlandvodka

Kombucha Making Kit Whether you guzzle it or gag on it, kombucha has proven it has staying power, and now the most health-conscious homos in your squad can whip up a fresh batch of their favorite fermented fizz without forking over a bundle per bottle. $45, farmsteady.com

Dessert Gallery Party in a Box A successful holiday potluck requires two staples: free-flowing booze and plenty of sweet treats. You’ll find the latter in this Party in a Box available in Southern Pecan Pie, Tres Leches, To-Die-For Fudge Pecan Pie, or a customizable tasting box. $40–$89, dessertgallery.com

Quartz Collective Healing Crystals

Sprints Running Hat The super-light, moisture-wicking Tropical Jaguars hat (unisex) protects athletes and outdoor enthusiasts from noggin burn and wet eyes whenever they feel like running wild. $29, getsprints.com

Cat Ball Bed Cats lick their plates clean when there’s fish on the menu, but roles are reversed when cute kitties become shark bait in

You don’t have to believe in magic to reap the benefits of this collection of curated stones and crystals — which is backed by scientific research, btw — that can help facilitate healing, luck, confidence, and calm and soothe negative nervous energy like anxiety. Rub ’em hard enough and you might even conjure up a top that can host. $29, quartzcollective.com

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CBD Under $20 Pop a literal chill pill when your in-laws start their shit at Christmas supper with CBD hemp capsules or gummies clocking in at under $20 for more than a week’s worth of you-don’t-give-a-fuckness. $7–20, cbdfx.com

Axol & Friends Succulentsbox.com The best gift for friends in tiny apartments is even tinier plants that don’t require a ton of care. Live-and-let-live succulents and minis are the perfect present — because who the hell wants to attend another ficus funeral? $5–228, succulentsbox.com

Rory Rockmore Pronoun Necklace Using proper pronouns in the LGBTQ community can be confusing — you’ll stand corrected if you accidentally misgender — but these 14K gold or white gold nameplate necklaces (also available in HE/him and SHE/her) remove all the guesswork so you can save face. $240, roryrockmore.com

STOCKING STUFFERS Mokuyobi Wallets This color-blocked, couldn’t-be-queerer-if-it-tried collection of clothing and accessories pop so hard Crayola is bluegreen with envy. Wallets so bright they’ll make a bish swish harder. $12–156, mokuyobi.com

These cute plush critters with a purpose have companion storybooks — Axol is gender neutral, using only the pronoun “they/them” in the books — which teach children about rare endangered species and advocate for sustainable, ethical production and consumerism while donating a portion of proceeds to youth empowerment programs around the world. $19, axolandfriends.com

Socks That Save LGBTQ Lives Take a cue from today’s black-sock-showing youth and don this out-and-proud rainbow-stripe pair, the proceeds from each will benefit The Trevor Project to provide crisis intervention and suicide prevention for LGBTQ youth. $17, fairtradewinds.net

HipDot Pressed Glitter Palette Hey Sis!, Big Boss Miss Ross, and Royal Riot are just a few of the names in HipDot’s 15-shade pressed glitter palette designed for all genders to beat their faces like Ziggy Stardust. Proceeds will be donated to the Anti-Violence Project. $30, hipdot.com

Tighty Whities Ornament Baby, it’s really cold outside with these festive, glass-assed skivvies that add some bulge to your bulbs. $18, alwaysfits.com

felixSEBASTIAN Earrings Burl Ives sang the praises of silver and gold in 1964’s Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer, but you can accessorize all the same with the very-now Nascence Collection Studs available in three shapes and metal tones. $50, iamfelixsebastian.com Q Mikey Rox is an award-winning journalist and LGBT lifestyle expert whose work has been published in more than 100 outlets across the world. He spends his time writing from the beach with his dog Jaxon. Connect with Mikey on Instagram @mikeyroxtravels

When selling real estate, you don’t want any part-�me agent working homes as a side hustle. You want a professional who’s versed in 1031 Exchanges, when to sell to avoid capital gains, taxes, and who works well with your lawyer, CPA and re�rement plan. With 35 years experience and broker/owner of my own firm, I’ve been in the top 10% of sales agents for decades. And I was the first ‘out’ LGBTQ agent on the Salt Lake Board of Realtors. Your money is important and I don’t charge high fees to provide you outstanding service.

Babs De Lay, Urban Utah Homes and Estates 801.201.8824

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Vegan gift guide for non-vegans

an-owned business), each sale of which provides 25 meals to families in need across the U.S. fjallraven.com; adventuristbackpacks.com

BY MIKEY ROX

Hiking shoes

Want to

be more eco-conscious but draw the line at eliminating animal products from your diet? Here are ways to live a semi-vegan lifestyle without going whole hog.

Bamboo straws Now that we’ve all ditched single-use plastic straws (you’re welcome, turtles) and turned to alternatives, it’s time to make this choice: theotherstraw bamboo straws hold up where paper crumbles and is easier on your pearly whites than unforgiving stainless steel. theotherstraw.com

Eco-fashion isn’t generally associated with on-trend style — sorry, vegans, it’s true — but Boulder, Colorado-based Lems changed that with its selection of vegan hiking shoes, like the Trailhead V2 and Mesa. The shoes’ mesh keeps feet aired-out and fresh while their natural foot shape keeps your dogs from barking on a lengthy roundtrip trail. lemsshoes.com

Hygiene Skincare There’s no shortage of vegan skincare products on the market. It’s the category’s most abundant non-edible, even though you can technically eat it — but, ya know, don’t. Favorites include Fork & Melon’s fine cleansing wash and rich hydrating cream with imported French watermelon oil, and daily eye cream from America’s first 100% men’s grooming and skincare brand Act of Being with its fancy-schmancy (and totally smooth) roll-on applicator. forkandmelon.com; actofbeing.com

Crystal Mineral deodorant sticks and stones (comprised of only one odor-preventing ingredient — pure mineral salt) allow you to raise your pits with PRIDE while Sprinjene’s vegan, kosher, gluten-free, halal toothpaste leave your chompers beaming with it. thecrystal.com; sprinjene.com

Backpacks Wanderlust with a clear conscience when you stack your rations into Fjallraven’s Re-Kanken backpack, constructed of vegan polyester made from recycled water bottles and available in a rainbow of colors, or the all-weather Safari backpack from Adventurist Backpack Co. (a lesbi-

Herbs SLC Haze

Nail polish Make a statement without opening your mouth (don’t want that purse to fall out) when you paint on chip-resistant, quick-drying, high-shine ella+mila cruelty-free, vegan nail polish available in more than 140 color shades. ellamila.com

SLC Haze is a cannabis lifestyle boutique located on State Street in Sandy. This holiday season, the Haze recommends, in part, their candles made with THC — now “That’s Holiday Cheer” — and longtime but obscure tea brand, The Queens Tea, created by Seth and Michael — the first same-sex couple to be

Faux fur jacket Velu’s faux fur reversible vegan jackets, particularly the Instagram-worthy Mac Daddy collection, lets you cruise the streets like a beast without killing any to keep you warm. velufur.com Q Mikey Rox is an award-winning journalist and LGBT lifestyle expert whose work has been published in more than 100 outlets across the world. @mikeyroxtravels.

legally married in Utah — who created it.

So stop by the boutique and say “High.”

The Queens Tea, starting at $13 Hand Poured Hemp Candles $20

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Holiday Markets Not Yo Mama’s Holiday Market SAGE Utah and Clever Octopus Creative Reuse Center teamed up to bring the Not Yo Mama’s Holiday Market to the Utah Pride Center. Local artisans and vendors will be selling their art, jewelry, photography, and more.

On Saturday, Dec. 7, 10 a.m. to 6 p.m., browse all the local talents, and pick up some oneof-a-kind gifts for the holiday season. The market is hosted by the Utah Pride Center, 1380 S. Main St., and is free and family-friendly.

This event will be a great place to showcase local artist’s handmade creations. If interested in applying to be a vendor (items priced under $100), go to bit.ly/UPCholidaymarket.

Urban Flea Market The Urban Flea Market at The Gateway will have a special Holiday Edition of the indoor market Sunday, December 8 from 10 a.m. to 4 p.m.

On the second Sunday of each month, the market transforms 20,000 square feet of industrial warehouse style space at The Gateway (across from the Snowflake Fountains) into Salt Lake’s biggest monthly Flea Market.

Over 80 vendors will offer eclectic and unique vintage and antique finds. Local crafters will provide cool handcrafted and upcycled vintage items. Local food trucks Fry Me To The Moon and Thai-licious Mobile Cuisine will be serving favorites throughout the day, along with coffee, cold beverages and snacks. Special guest DJ Bad Brad Wheeler from KUAA RADIO will be spinning Flea Market Rock all day.

They invite you to support the Wildlife Rehabilitation Center of Northern Utah by

HOLIDAY SHOPPING GUIDE | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | 23

donating your gently used clean towels and sheets at the Urban Flea Market information table.

Admission: $2 for adults.

Children under 12 free. Parking is free in the North lot.

Annual Clay Arts Sale “Black Friday” shopping doesn’t have to mean crowded malls with generic gifts made far, far away.

Here in Salt Lake City, the better answer for Thanksgiving weekend shopping is the 20th Annual Clay Arts Utah Holiday Sale.

The Sugarhouse Park Garden Center, 1602 E. 2100 South, hosts the event from 10 a.m to 5 p.m. on Friday and Saturday, Nov. 29 and 30. Admission and parking are free.

Local artists will offer their handmade clay artwork for sale, including functional pottery, dinnerware, sculpture, and decorative artwork.Participating artists are skilled in clay and ceramics arts, including wheel-thrown and hand-built pieces. Included are several award-winning artists and noted studio teachers. The range of designs and of prices (from as low as $10) will make for a colorful and inspiring shopping experience.

More info at ­clayartsutah.com

Made in Utah Winter Fest Utah Stories and The Gateway will be holding the second annual Made in Utah Winter Fest in collaboration with The Gateway’s holiday light experience Dec. 7–22 from 1 to 9 p.m.

The Fest is a community-driven, free, family-friendly market that showcases some of Utah artists, musicians, artisans, product makers including breweries, distilleries, restaurants, food trucks, and other local businesses in Utah, while boosting our local economy.

Rio Grande Street will be closed to traffic so you can walk down the street, look at the winter decorations and lights and listen to music by local artists while drinking hot winter-themed beverages. Q

Gay Mormon Dad

A MEMOIR CH AD ANDER SON

Available Now on Kindle or in Paperback at Amazon.com

Chad Anderson grew up gay in a large Mormon family. After years of trying to conform to religious standards, which promised a cure for homosexuality, he married and had children before finally coming out of the closet. Gay Mormon Dad is his story of finally learning to love himself in a complicated world. Chad currently resides with his two sons in Salt Lake City, where he works as a social worker and a writer.

Order now at bit.ly/GayMormonDad

24 | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | HOLIDAY SHOPPING GUIDE

Qsaltlake.com |

ISSUE 306 | November 21, 2019

Holiday Shopping Guide:

Season’s Readings A book is a present they’ll open again and again.

BY TERRI SCHLICHENMEYER

So, it’s

a wrap. Everything’s under paper and under the tree.

You’re done with all your shopping, except for one person. Or two. Maybe four.

So what do you get for that hard-to-buy-for person who never likes anything? Well, as they say, a book is a present they’ll open again and again, so why not head to your local bookstore for these great gifts:

LGBTQ INTEREST For the person who loves someone who doesn’t identify strictly as male-female will appreciate unwrapping SHE HE THEY ME by Robyn Ryle this year. It’s a book that acts a bit like those old “choose-yourown-adventure” as it examines and explains gender, its definitions, and the way it’s been perceived historically.

Hint: this is fun, and it’s also a book for someone who’s questioning.

If your giftee is exploring the ideas and limits of gender, you can’t go wrong by wrapping up NONBINARY: MEMOIRS OF GENDER AND IDENTITY, edited by Micah Rajunov and Scott Duane.

This is a book filled with tales of those who’ve examined (or are examining) questions of gender, sexuality, age, and race.

For the child with two mommies or two daddies, and for the kids in that child’s preschool session, THE GAYBCs

by M.L. Webb will make a great class gift. It’s the A-B-Cs, but with terms familiar to the LGBTQ community and their families, so it’s for them, too.

Or it might make a great gift

for the adult who still possesses the wonder of a child. Or for an adult, just because.

For the newlywed (or the about-to-be-wed), THE GAY MARRIAGE GENERATION

by Peter Hart-Brinson is the book to give. It takes a look at how same-sex marriage became law across the country, and how it changed the way America looks at gay men and lesbians. The gay giftee might also like OUT OF THE SHADOWS: REIMAGINING GAY MEN’S LIVES by Walt Odets in that same wrapped gift.

The person on your list who enjoys reading short stories will love EVERY TRUE PLEASURE: LGBTQ TALES OF NORTH CAROLINA edited

by Wilton Barnhardt. It’s absolutely filled with tales from the South and from the heart.

For the parent of someone who’s come out this year, consider giving EMBRACING THE JOURNEY by Greg and Lynn McDonald, with Beth Jusino, foreword by Greg McDonald Jr. It’s a guide, really, for Christian parents who learn that their child is gay, lesbian, bisexual, or transgender, and how it fits with your spiritual beliefs.

The movie buff on your list will love reading HOLLYWOOD CHINESE: THE CHINESE IN AMERICAN FEATURE FILMS by Arthur Dong. This beautifully illustrated book tells the story of Chinese and Chinese American actors from the first films shot in Chinatown, to modern times and contemporary film professionals. How can you go wrong?

For the giftee who is

searching for new meaning in life, wrap up MY BUDDHA IS PINK: BUDDHISM FOR THE MODERN HOMOSEXUAL by Richard Harrold. It’s a book of essays being a gay Buddhist and reconciling old beliefs with a new way of mindfulness and fulfillment in a new lifestyle.

ANIMALS AND PETS There are actually three kinds of people who will love seeing NO BEAST SO FIERCE by Dane Huckelbridge under the tree: animal lovers, for sure, will want to read this book about deadly tigers. Conservationists will be eager to see what the author says. And adventure lovers will thrill at the danger inside this book.

Lucky are those three people with this book. Lucky you, if they’re one in the same giftee.

Shaw is unwrapped. Filled with the cutest of kitten pictures, this book is a delight right there. Add plenty of information and tips on saving orphans, and you’ve got a book absolutely meant to give this holiday.

No dog lover is going to want to miss UNLEASHING YOUR DOG by Marc Bekoff and Jessica Pierce. It’s about how your giftee can learn more about their dog by learning about the dog’s senses and how to make Doggo as happy as possible through those senses. Wrap it up with SMOKY THE BRAVE by Damien Lewis, the true story of a tiny Yorkie dog and his role in World War II. The lover of wildlife and the feeder of birds will squawk when they open SAVING JEMIMA by Julie Zuckefoose. It’s the story of a blue jay and the woman who helped raise her, who kept the bird alive, and who loved a feathered friend. For more wild book lovers, try THE HIDDEN WORLD OF THE FOX by Adele Brand, and let your giftee see what the fox says. (Hint, this makes a great stocking-stuffer).

BIOGRAPHY / AUTOBIOGRAPHY / MEMOIR

That cat lover on your list will yowl with joy when TINY BUT MIGHTY by Hannah

For the fiercest of fierce women on your gift list, look for PASSIONATE SPIRIT: THE LIFE OF ALMA MAHLER by Cate Haste. It’s the story of Mahler, wife of the artist, who was also the first woman to write an opera at a time when women were supposed to be shadows of their husbands.

It’s one of those little-know stories you should know.

NOVEMBER 21, 2019  | 

ISSUE 306  |  Qsaltlake.com

The giftee who needs a boost of confidence will love unwrapping MORE THAN ENOUGH by Elaine Welteroth. It’s the story of the author’s realization that she really was everything she needed to be, and that’s a great lesson to take into the new year.

They say that America’s Royalty sprang from the New England area and if your giftee is a fan or follower, then wrap up THE KENNEDY HEIRS by J. Randy Taraborrelli. This big book is all about the JFK kids and their generation, as well as their cousins.

For the person who’s spent time this year as caregiver to a parent, HOW TO FORGET by Kate Mulgrew is the book to wrap. It’s the story of caring and loss, and coming to terms with a past that one may or may not know until secrets are no longer kept.

her activism, her life, and her music.

If there’s a Hollywood watcher on your gift list this year, then wrap up SEDUCTION: SEX, LIES AND STARDOM IN HOWARD HUGHES’S HOLLYWOOD

by Karina Longworth. It’s the story of a very rich man, the women who wanted him (or his money, or both) and the women who got what they wanted — much to their regret.

Historians and connoisseurs alike will love reading THE BOURBON KING by Bob Batchelor. It’s the story of George Remus, his crimes, and his totally illegal prohibition-era empire.

SPORTS The sports fan is going to love THE STRENUOUS LIFE by Ryan Swanson. It’s the story of Teddy Roosevelt, arguably America’s most fit President, and how his influence (almost obsession) made Americans want to be fit and healthy, too, which launched a country-wide love of sports.

HOLIDAY SHOPPING GUIDE   |  QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE  |  25

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The Anglophile on your gift list will love having OUR RAINBOW QUEEN by Sali Hughes under the tree. It’s a celebration of Queen Elizabeth’s colorful style and the splashy fashions she favors.

For the lover of music, feminism, and fierce women, NO WALLS AND THE RECURRING DREAM by Ani DiFranco will make a perfect gift. It’s the story of DiFranco’s first thirty years on earth,

For the reader who loves a little bit of romance with their ghost story, THE GHOST CLAUSE by Howard Norman is a good choice. It’s the story of a ghost and his reflections on his marriage, as he observes the union of the new owners of his former home. Wrap it up with THE PLUS ONE by Sarah Archer, a novel about a robotics engineer who needs a date for a wedding. So why not just make one?

Many more books are on the QSaltLake.com website. If you have any questions, need more ideas, or need help finding things, be sure to ask your local booksellers. They’re the ones wearing invisible Super Hero logos because they know things and they know how to make your giftee smile.  Q

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To schedule an appointment, please call 801-883-9177 Evening and Saturday Appointments Available Most Insurances Accepted

26 | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | HOLIDAY SHOPPING GUIDE

Qsaltlake.com |

ISSUE 306 | November 21, 2019

sex and salt lake city

Stuff your own stocking

BY DR. LAURIE BENNETT-COOK

At a recent

social gathering the topic around the room came to best sex necessities. I gotta say, there are some pretty sexually creative people in this town.

With all the ideas, there were three, clear, top contenders, that everyone in the room agreed on.

time with a partner. Not sure what your favorite is? Go to any of the adult stores in town and pick out several.

Practice masturbating with each until you find one that feels best to you.

PRO TIPS: Place a drop or two of lube on your penis PRIOR to placing on the condom.

This will greatly increase your sensitivity. Also, condoms do expire. Make sure to check the dates on any you’ve been hanging onto for the past year.

Vibrators

Condoms The gift that prevents over-giving. I suggest heading to Costco and picking up a good size pack of your favorite brand. The worst time to realize you don’t have any at your disposal for sexy time with a partner is …. when you’re in the throws of a sexy

If you’re unfamiliar with vibrators it’s easy to feel overwhelmed. If this is your first introduction to a vibrator, don’t spend too much. Simply head to Walgreens and pick up a hand-held “massager” for about $10. Using this is usually enough to decide if the vibrating sensation is even something you’d enjoy. If you decide it’s for you, and you decide you want something with a bit more power or made more specifically for a certain piece of your anatomy, head to your friendly neighborhood adult toy store.

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tor sold in the world is the Hitachi Magic Wand, so it deserves mentioning here.

The vibrator was created for physical therapy patients and can be found in most physical therapy doctor offices. I can personally vouch for this — it does a lot more than just heal sore muscles. For around $50 you really can’t go wrong.

PRO TIP: For some the Hitachi can be too powerful when used directly on the skin. Placing a hand towel (or “dream catcher” as I like to call them) between the Hitachi and your skin can spread the sensation and lesson the intensity, making it even more pleasurable. When shopping for it, keep in mind the original Hitachi plugs into the wall so you never have to worry about batteries dying when the going gets good, but newer versions do have interchangeable attachments that can be ordered.

If you (or the gift receiver) are a more seasoned vibrator user, consider my personal favorite, the Crave. It’s a small, classy, piece of jewelry that hangs as a pendent on a chain.

The Crave comes in Sterling Sliver, Rose Gold, or 24 Karat Gold and can be engraved. It vibrates on several settings and is very quiet. It’s also rechargeable via a USB port and can easily be cleaned after use with some rubbing alcohol on a cotton swab. Also, it travels really well. Personally I’ve worn mine as a necklace though many airport security screenings. Truly, this is a per-

sonal gift that will definitely keep giving.

Lube If lube is something you’ve yet to try, now is the time. If lube is something you’re familiar with, get more familiar. And if lube is something you use often, kudos to you and keep it up!

Here’s the thing with lube — not only do sensations increase when sexy bits are slippery, but lube also reduces the risk of STIs. By lubricating the soft places we put hard things in, we mitigate the possibility of small tears or abrasions, thus reducing the ability for any STI to have an entry point or way to be passed along.

Let’s be honest, there is NO shame in contracting an STI. However, while all of them are treatable, they are still a nuisance and require medical care that isn’t always easy to go through. If you can reduce the probability of contracting something, as well as try out new flavors, sensations, temperatures — then really, what are you waiting for?

Pro tip: There are many different variations of lube.

Do yourself a favor and Google: the difference between silicone and water-based; PH differences for those with sensitivities; and which lubes to use with toys and which not.

If only there was room in this article alone, but really we could dedicate a whole issue to lubes alone.

Happy Holidays! May you play safe, consensual, and live out your fantasies. Q Dr. Laurie Bennett-Cook is a Clinical Sexologist offering private sessions at her location in Salt Lake City as well as via Tele-Therapy. She is the director of Sex Positive Utah, which can be found on Meetup. She can be reached at DrLaurieBennettCook@gmail.com

NOVEMBER 21, 2019 |

HOLIDAY SHOPPING GUIDE | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | 27

ISSUE 306 | Qsaltlake.com

screen queens The Johns

BY CHRIS AZZOPARDI

Polyester John Waters staged a live chicken decapitation for his 1969 debut feature Mondo Trasho.

In the following year’s Multiple Maniacs, he made anal sex with rosary beads a thing. And in Pink Flamingos, Divine, his drag muse, committed fully to her art by eating real dog crap for a scene. So by the time 1981 rolled around, the King of Filth was over it, ready to move away from the filth and find some fresh inspiration via the 1950s.

He looked to bygone moms, specifically the classic trope of the overburdened middle-class housewife. With a beefed-up budget of $300,000, he rounded up his motley crew of John Waters regulars, including Divine as Christian mother-of-two Francine Fishpaw, for Polyester, released in 1981.

A hysterically melodramatic spoofing of the American suburbs, the film holds up as one of Waters’ finest comedies — due in large part to the game cast, including Edith Massey as Francine’s debutante friend Cuddles, who regularly dispenses basic-mom-type inspirational bromides to soothe Francine.

And with Tab Hunter playing opposite Divine as, naturally, the hunk who swoops in to save her from domestic agony — his

name, Todd Tomorrow, is overthe-top perfection — Polyester nudged Waters closer to mainstream notoriety and would eventually give him enough household-name clout to make Hairspray and Serial Mom. Among the supplemental features on Criterion Collection’s new Waters-approved Blu-ray edition is a feature where Hunter, in an interview shot several years before his death in 2018, appears on-camera to discuss playing Todd despite his agent’s advice to pass. In a separate interview conducted by out film critic Michael Musto specifically for this special edition, Waters discusses various aspects of the film, including the movie’s wide-ranging smells (the Criterion edition includes an “Odorama” scratchand-sniff card), Tab Hunter’s kiss with Divine, and Divine’s evolution from monster to heralded sympathetic housewife.

Rocketman Elton John’s on-the-surface glitzy, larger-than-life story can’t be contained to a mere biopic.

The shiny gay costumes, the shiny gay glasses. The drugs, the overdose. The parental rejection.

But then, of course, the story’s greatest turn of events: how Elton John rose above it all to become, well, Elton John. So Rocketman, fortunately, is a razzle-dazzle, Broadway-big musical with an apt surrealist flair that arranges the elements — the dark, the decadent — of Elton’s life and career into a wild, oth-

erworldly fever dream (it even leans proudly into its subject’s innate queerness, unlike last year’s Bohemian Rhapsody). In the film, directed by Dexter Fletcher, we meet Elton as he makes a very Elton entrance, storming into the scene with fully bedazzled devil horns, feathered wings and gem-encrusted heart specs to go to … rehab.

Amid parental pushback on his passion for music and his homosexuality, a critical career moment occurs at one of L.A.’s historically famous music venues, the Troubadour, where Elton jams on the piano, playing his hit “Crocodile Rock.” When he hilariously levitates, the crowd joining him in mid-air as he hovers over his piano bench, Elton’s life is no longer a match for reality. Only a supernatural flourish can truly register his emerging stardom. Capturing the essence of Elton with precision, charm and his own singing voice — and the heartbreak of having your parents reject you — is Welsh actor Taron Egerton. His magnetic presence is such a staggering revelation it’s impossible to imagine what Rocketman would be like without him carrying it on his sequined shoulders.

Included among the supplemental features is “Becoming Elton

John,” where Egerton talks about transforming into John; during the short feature, John, executive producer, discusses watching the film, calling it simultaneously “eerie” and “satisfying.”

Clips on staging the musical numbers and the costumes, as well as Egerton’s studio session (where John gives Egerton free rein), are also among the loaded special features.

Booksmart Nerd-friends Amy (Kaitlyn Dever) and Molly (Beanie Feldstein) have a bright future ahead of them. Amy is going to Columbia, and Molly is off to Yale. They worked hard to get into those Ivy League schools and have been rewarded accordingly… and, wait, the kids who drank and smoked and partied also got accepted to those schools? Q

28 | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | A&E

BALLET

In 1944, critics were stunned when Christensen staged the first full-length NUTCRACKER in America. “We can’t understand why a vehicle of such fantastic beauty and originality would not be produced in its entirety in this country until now.” It was produced on a shoestring budget, but captivated a nation. Now, during this momentous year and following a $3-million new production, see the original choreography, just as Mr. C intended it — and only at BALLET WEST. SATURDAY — THE NUTCRACKER: 75TH ANNIVERSARY

Tony’s 7 Gay CONCERTS Agenda

Capitol Theatre, 116 S. Rio Grande St., times vary through Dec. 26. Tickets $42-109, balletwest.org

BY TONY HOBDAY

As a long-jawed Salt Lake City tradition, join the SALT LAKE MEN’S CHOIR for their 38th annual Christmas Concert. Ring in the holiday season with this family-friendly music event. The choir sings Christmas music from many genres: classical, swing, contemporary, sacred, humorous, and always with a smile on their faces. This year the choir is joined by an orchestra, full brass section, and the First Baptist Church’s incredible pipe organ. And don’t forget to take food donations to help the Homeless Youth Resource Center, which will collected at the door.

FRIDAY — SLMC: CHRISTMAS FLOURISHES

13

First Baptist Church, 777 S. 1300 East, 7 p.m., through Sunday. Tickets $20, slmenschoir.org or at the door.

Qsaltlake.com |

ISSUE 306 | November 21, 2019

SPECIAL ENGAGEMENTS

The new holiday rock opera THE BELL RINGER is coming to Utah. The show features former TRANS-SIBERIAN ORCHESTRA members JODY ASHWORTH and VALERIE VIGODA, and delivers a powerful and inspiring experience in the early TSO tradition, combining rock music with poignant storytelling. The Bell Ringer is the debut album from Seattle-area progressive rock band SYMPHONY NORTH, and it relates a story that builds on the ideas of selflessness and self-worth, employing the talents of musicians hailing originally from as far as Sweden, Spain, Russia, and Turkey. The Bell Ringer album also features members of Dream Theater — James Labrie and Jordan Rudess — weaving anthemic renditions of Holiday classics with powerful original songs. The show is raising money for the TOYS FOR TOTS LITERACY PROGRAM, to give kids not just a gift to open during the holidays, but the skills to help them build their futures.

THURSDAY — THE BELL RINGER

19

Jeanne Wagner Theatre, Rose Wagner Center, 138 W. 300 South, 7:30 p.m. Tickets $30–40, artsaltlake.org

THEATRE

A Red Rider BB gun, a tongue stuck to a frozen pole, a gaudy woman’s leg wearing a fishnet stocking lamp, a boy’s mouth washed out with soap, hillbilly neighbors with 785 smelly hound dogs, and more weirdness — all make for the perfect CHRISTMAS STORY. AN OTHER THEATER COMPANY stages the Christmas holiday hit by writer David Sedaris, THE ­SANTALAND DIARIES. Out of work, our slacker decides to become a Macy’s elf during the holiday crunch. At first the job is simply humiliating, but once the thousands of visitors start pouring through Santa’s workshop, he becomes battle-weary and bitter. Finding consolation in the fact that some of the other elves were television extras on One Life to Live, he grins and bears it, occasionally taking out his frustrations on the children and parents alike.

The title says it all — and that’s why it was one of Broadway’s funniest and longest-running plays, and now it comes to the PIONEER THEATRE COMPANY stage.

A hilarious hybrid of Monty Python and Sherlock Holmes, the opening night of THE MURDER AT HAVERSHAM MANOR is one you won’t forget. With an unconscious leading lady, a corpse that can’t play dead, and actors who trip over everything (including their lines), it’ll be a riot for this holiday season.

TUESDAY — A CHRISTMAS STORY

3 6 6

Delta Performance Hall, Eccles Theater, 131 S. Main St., times vary through Dec. 8. Tickets $50-120, artsaltlake.org

FRIDAY — THE SANTALAND DIARIES

An Other Theater Company, 1200 Centre Blvd., Provo, 7:30 p.m., through Dec. 21. Tickets $12-15 online/$14-17 at the door, anothertheatercompany.com

Ballet West’s ‘The Nutcracker,’ now in its 75th year.

PHOTO: BEAU PEARSON

FRIDAY — THE PLAY THAT GOES WRONG

Pioneer Theatre, 300 S. 1400 East, UofU, times vary through Dec. 21. Tickets $33-47, pioneertheatre.org

NOVEMBER 21, 2019 |

A&E | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | 29

ISSUE 306 | Qsaltlake.com

Utah Rep’s ‘American Psycho’ is bloody sexy Trump

and his unyielding hunger for power and prominence inspires Patrick Bateman’s callous behavior and mindless murders.

With repeated, shouted choruses of “Lock Him Up” at public events, the passion felt toward Donald Trump has dramatically shifted since Patrick Bateman idolized him reverentially as “The Donald.”

“Bateman and Trump are both textbook narcissists,” says Johnny Hebda, who plays the lead character in the musical adaptation of American Psycho, Brett Easton Ellis’ combustible bestseller. “They view themselves as above the rules and superior to other people. What they have achieved, or more importantly the perception of what they have achieved determines their value and worth, and success is the most important thing in their lives.”

Where the 2000 film focused more on the horror and black humor of the novel, the musical goes for the jugular, ramping up the ridiculous humor and graphic sexuality to reflect the heightened state of a musical. The soulless murders are not for suspense or drama, but used as an intellectual trope, emphasizing the caustic satire about materialism and unbridled sex — and the empty feeling that comes with being satisfied by nothing.

“Beginning in the ’80s, men were prettifying themselves in ways they weren’t before,” author Ellis has explained. “They were taking on a lot of the tropes of gay male culture and bringing it into the straight male culture — in terms of grooming, looking a certain way, going to the gym, waxing and being almost the gay-porn ideals. That seemed to me much more interesting than whether he is or is not a serial killer.”

“It is surprising how much of myself I see,” says Hebda about playing the designer-dressed — and undressed — antihero. “Though set in 1989, the subject matter is surprisingly topical.

Patrick Bateman, as well as characters in

the story, represent at least on the surface, the American Dream — successful careers, financial security, elevated status in society, the height of fashion, perfect bodies, haircuts, tans, and a very fun and exciting social life. But underneath, they are characters void of depth or meaningful relationships. They are deeply unhappy and their reputation and society dictate their decisions in life.”

American Psycho: The Musical, a production by the adventurous Utah Repertory Theater Company, is the brainchild of Tony- and Grammy-winning musician Duncan Sheik (Broadway’s Spring Awakening) and Roberto Aguirre-Sacasa, best known for his work for Marvel Comics and The Chilling Adventures of Sabrina.

“So smooth, so rich, so ruthless. A carnal carnival of song and dance,” reviewed The New York Times, while the Associated Press wrote, “American Psycho slays onstage!

Wonderful!

Graphic sex acts, torturing, stabbing, slashing, ax-wielding, snorting coke off toilets and a marvelous score.”

“I look at American Psycho as a fable, as an allegory, as an amazing commentary on contemporary Western civilization,” the composer told an interviewer. “He’s sort of the victim of the world in which he lives.”

Pure joy from curtain up to chainsaw down, American Psycho: The Musical veers between comedic and horrific, between satire and splatter-horror, and between a savage social diary of the times and a vivid exploration of psychological disintegration. The slick, sexy, highly disturbing show will have you snort-laughing into your chardonnay before coward-punching you in the gut. Q American Psycho: The Musical opens Nov. 30 and runs through Dec. 15, Eccles Theatre, Regent Street Black Box Theater, 144 S. Regent St., SLC. Tickets available at utahrep.org.

PHOTOS: BLAKE YELAVICH

30 | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | Q&A

Qsaltlake.com |

ISSUE 306 | November 21, 2019

‘Hedwig’s’ John Cameron Mitchell:

Love me little, love me long

BY CHRIS AZZOPARDI

You very

well may have uncovered a truer you thanks to John Cameron Mitchell.

Maybe it happened while you were experiencing some kind of divine queer intervention through soul-searching heroine Hedwig Robinson, who comes into herself after making the most of a botched sex change in one of cinema’s greatest slow burns, Hedwig and the Angry Inch. (The project only became lucrative for Mitchell as a Broadway smash 13 years after his indie cult film premiered in 2001.) Or maybe the real queer sex in 2006’s Shortbus, which took shame out of human sexuality, stimulated your own queer sexual awakening.

Mitchell’s career has also included directing Nicole Kidman in 2010’s Rabbit Hole and co-writing, co-producing and directing the 2017 sci-fi punk rom-com How to Talk to Girls at Parties. His TV credits include The Good Fight, HBO’s Girls and Hulu’s Shrill.

But Anthem: Homunculus is another animal altogether. Mitchell styled the project as a radio play, engaging the imagination while relying only on voice and music to tell his emotional story. Available via the Luminary podcast app, the darkly humorous 10-part series presents a richly poignant, autobiographical narrative that touches on themes of loss and religion as it imagines Mitchell’s life if he’d never left his small-town of Junction City, Kansas. His broke, uninsured and struggling artist alter ego, Ceann Mackay (voiced

by Mitchell), suffers from a brain tumor, the result, he says, of growing up plagued

by Catholic guilt. To help pay for his surgery, he launches an app-based “tumor telethon” to crowdfund his survival. In confronting his own mortality, he reflects profoundly on his past, including his brother’s death (Mitchell was 14 when his 4-year-old brother died from a heart condition) and a cast of Broadway icons — including Patti LuPone as his Aunt Ida, and Glenn Close as his mother — inhabit versions of friends and family members from Mitchell’s life. For his Origin of Love Tour, he’s been performing songs from the

podcast as well as sharing the backstory of how Hedwig became Hedwig. I caught up with Mitchell while he was on a train en route to Boston.

You go deep into some of your own heavy life experiences during “Anthem: Homunculus.” How emotional was the process of creating it? When you do something like this you don’t get an opening night, you don’t get an audience, so you don’t get the whole arrival that an opening night of a play or a movie or even a concert has with an audience, which kind of seals it in a way. So it still feels unfelt. Making it was very intense and emotional, but it was spread out over a year-and-a-half. But we just scheduled a marathon listening session in a movie theater, so we’re going to have food and breaks and live music and listening to the whole thing with 200 people. We’re going to do a special cinema mix for it so that’ll be, I think, our beginning of letting go, which is good because that’s what an opening should be: graduation for your child.

So far, how has “Anthem” resonated with listeners? What are you hearing? The thing is, it’s not as many people as we’d hoped and we knew the risk of a paywall was a part of it. Some people are just subscription fatigued, so a lot of people haven’t really listened to it. Those who do, generally when they’ve heard it, they’re very into it. There’s also not a thing like it you can compare it to. As with most of my work, it’s kind of different, so it’s hard to market, which means the initial run of the play, movie, podcast does not smash or knock it out of the park; it tends to be something that’s passed on ... like a disease. (Laughs.) No — like an heirloom!

So it becomes more special that way. But it does take time to do that, and it’s still in the filtering stage.

That really is just the John Cameron Mitchell way. Yeah. It means less money and less of the usual definition of heat and buzz and all of that. But a little over a long period of time is always my way of working.

It’s “love me little, love me long.”

NOVEMBER 21, 2019 |

ISSUE 306 | Qsaltlake.com

It must be encouraging, at least, knowing that a project can have its moment much later, which was the case for Hedwig and the Angry Inch. This is pushing the envelope and people have to catch up with it. Same thing happened with Shortbus and Hedwig, and even, I suspect, my last film How to Talk to Girls at Parties will be something that will come around later.

Why did you want to tell your story at this point in your life? It’s just when people do.

You’re 56. Is that the age people tell the story of their life? It can be. It’s usually the time when your parents go and that can embolden some people. Kids are out of the house, if you have kids. And it’s kind of a mid-career thing to do. I like the idea of auto-fiction, where you’re still making things up and telling stories that are true but rearranging them. So autobiographical fiction is my favorite kind of fiction.

Well, you did tell me the last time we spoke that reality bores you. Yeah. I mean, I’m not completely bored with realism, and I love artists that work in supernaturalistic ways, but my take just tends to be more fairytale and a little bit of comic book.

Tell me about this incredibly dramatic, geometric dress you’ve been wearing during the Origin of Love Tour. I think it’s called the “transformer.” (Laughs.) It’s not called anything.

That’s the name that’s floating around. So you didn’t name it, but somebody did. The “transformer” dress, I’ll take it. It’s Erik Bergrin, someone I have known for a very long time and always admired. But there’s a lot of talented people, and when I was first thinking about the tour I knew I couldn’t bring much of the sets, so I knew the costumes should be a kind of set and I wanted it to break into multiple costumes. I first spoke to Thom Brown, the fashion designer, about it and he was really into it, but designers can rarely do plays. Fashion designers don’t have time for other projects unless it’s a video or something already existing.

A lot of my collaborators are people who are brilliant but coming up, that people don’t know. I get great pleasure introducing people’s work to the world,

and plus they work their ass off when they’re hungry and have something to prove. And Erik is such a genius that I expect to work with him on a stage version of Anthem and other projects, and he did exactly what I wanted: a six-costume “transformer” dress (laughs) inspired by the cubists, and he exceeded my dreams.

We’ve got a light-up removable heart. The costume has been around the world and is very sturdy and industrial and lights up and so I’m thrilled with that.

Also, as we go along it’s kind of like (the fable) Stone Soup: we add elements. In Korea, they added a live projection design with an overhead projector and someone manipulating color forms with their hands live. We adopted that. I think we’re gonna do it in Ann Arbor too. And then we often sing a song from that town or in the language of the country we’re in, so I sing Korean songs or Spanish songs in Mexico, and in Boston we sang “More Than a Feeling.”

At this point, I imagine “The Origin of Love,” the song from Hedwig, carries a lot of weight because there are so many personal stories wrapped up in it from you hearing fan stories over the years. Where do you go in your head now when you’re singing that song? Does it take on new life depending on where you perform it? It does. As an actor I often just see the images I’m singing about and that comes out in different ways. It shouldn’t be too rigid. Doing it for various shows, we do “The Origin of Love” and then we do “The End of Love.”

What else are you working on right now?

I heard there’s something happening with you and Hulu. I am developing a television show with them that I can’t really talk about right now because they have to decide this month whether it’s going to go forward. They go through all the projects and decide, but I’m very excited about it. I’m still determined to get Anthem on stage.

I do love Anthem in the audio format. I love that my imagination gets to take me places. Yes, that’s what a book does too. And people aren’t used to it so much in the audio form — there are some fictional

Q&A | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | 31

things, but they seem to be a little more stylized. It’s great to work in that form.

I’d like to see what the Broadway version would be like. And I also did a little benefit 12-inch LP of Lou Reed songs that will be coming out for the holiday called Turning Time Around, produced by Peter Buck of R.E.M. Jumping back to Origin of Love: I’m so moved by the fact that the tour really came out of needing to financially assist your mother, who is living with Alzheimer’s. How is she doing and has this tour accomplished what you set out to accomplish when it comes to helping her? Well, it helped. And it continues to help. The amount of money is so large, and Shrill is my real big money job. The Origin of Love brings in some, but I didn’t want to do it alone to track, so I get to bring a lot of people around and that makes it less lucrative but more fun. It’s turned out to be something I’m really proud of and that will continue for years, off and on, because it’s just an easy show to do without doing a whole musical, which I’m kind of tired of.

You’re tired of the Hedwig musical? Yeah.

So this can still touch on the themes and touch on other themes that deal with today: growing up and my boyfriend and the motivation for a lot of things, and it’s just a lot more fun. On Broadway they didn’t let me crowd surf for insurance purposes, so this is a corrective.

Right, you crowd-surfed at the Sydney Opera House in Australia. I do it every night.

What does it feel like to be carried by humans you don’t know? That’s a lot of trust you’re putting into complete strangers. Yeah, but they trust me. It’s a direct metaphor for the work and the person receiving it, and it’s being held up in a very gentle way. Sometimes it’s the story, or I am too heavy, and someone else steps in to help. I believe in audiences and being in the same space. Q As editor of Q Syndicate, Chris Azzopardi has interviewed a multitude of superstars, including Cher, Meryl Streep, Mariah Carey and Beyoncé. His work has also appeared in The New York Times, Vanity Fair, GQ and Billboard. Reach him via Twitter @chrisazzopardi.

32 | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | FOOD & DRINK

Qsaltlake.com |

ISSUE 306 | November 21, 2019

Local restaurants are the best certificate gifts

BY MICHAEL AARON

I thought Salt Lake City’s BEST VEGETARIAN! Dine In, Take Out, or WE CATER!

234 West 900 south verticaldiner.com

x E

tr em

e Cuisine

I was “just giving a gift certificate,” but the look on their face was almost disbelief. We grew up in Sunset, Utah, right behind the Pizzeria and Circle Inn. As I was driving up for Christmas, I wondered ... do you think they have gift certificates? I mean, I’ll go in and ask, and if they say no, I can stop at an Olive Garden or something.

They did. Printed on a laser printer, hand-signed by the bartender. And they had a cute envelope to put them in.

And they were a connection to our past.

THAT is buying local.

Look around on these

two pages, and you will see ­LOCALLY OWNED restaurants who WELCOME your business. A gift certificate from them stays in the community, helps a small business — or even a family — make payroll that week.

You know these restaurants welcome our community, because they are paying to reach out to us.

Local, LGBTQ-friendly, small businesses, community-oriented. How far away from the one percenters can you get?

Reach out and do something great this year with a gift from a LOCAL LGBT-friendly restauarant. I dare you. Q

Gift Certificates Available

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FOOD & DRINK | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | 33

ISSUE 306 | Qsaltlake.com

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34 | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | COMICS

Qsaltlake.com |

ISSUE 306 | November 21, 2019

NOVEMBER 21, 2019 |

PUZZLES | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | 35

ISSUE 306 | Qsaltlake.com

LGBT Slogans

Each Sudoku puzzle has a unique solution which can be reached logically without guessing. Enter digits 1 through 9 into the blank spaces. Every row must contain one of each digit, as must each column and each 3x3 square. Qdoku is actually five separate, but connected, Sudoku puzzles.

Q doku

Level: Medium

2 4 8 5 6 2 7 8

2

3 5

6 9 7 8 2 1 8 3

8 7 9 6 4 1 7

4 2 1 7 6

5

5

8

4

2

5 2 7 4 8 6

7

5

2 1

4

9

7

9 2 3 4 3

2

2 4 4 6

6 9

7 1

9 5

6 2 8 1

9

6

8 3 6 5

7

1 9

8 7 8 3 5

7 8 9

2 3 4

4

9

9 4

3

3

1 6 7

8

1 2 7 8

9

4

4 1 7 3 9 6

8 1

1 3

8

5

6 4 5 3 9 2 7

43 Trick joint, maybe 44 “The end of ___” 46 Mama’s boy ACROSS 47 Wood and more 1 Clay Aiken and 48 Tiny bits on South others Beach 6 “Dancing Queen” 51 Bellows of Ally band McBeal 10 Adam and Steve’s 53 Slogan used to draw locale? attention to the 14 Oscar winner Marisa AIDS crisis 15 Vibrator measure 59 Label on a lemon 16 Winged goddess that isn’t a fruit 17 “Ready ___, here I 61 “Queen of Country” come!”

McEntire 18 Piece of Aaron 62 Kilmer simile phrase Copland 19 Chin stroker’s words 63 Star Trek counselor Deanna 20 Slogan on banners 64 Deviate of the Pink Pistols 65 Helmeted cartoon 23 Atlas Shrugged character author Rand 66 A. Spear’s state 24 Mob collectors 26 “Suzie Q” band, for 67 Slips up 68 Words said from short one’s knees 28 T, as in Leviticus 31 With 33-Across, DOWN slogan coined by 1 “Believe ___ not!”

Frank Kameny 2 Nickelodeon ex33 See 31-Across plorer 34 Sorta 3 Potent leader?

37 Grazing ground 4 Sculptor da Vinci 38 River of Michelange- 5 Be passive lo’s land 6 Admit openly 39 Woman who goes 7 Conks on the head both ways?

8 Words on a book 40 Give a pink slip to jacket 41 Tyler of _Lord of 9 Cruising, maybe the Rings_ 10 It’s hard to figure 42 Kahlo’s country out PUZZLE SOLUTIONS ON PAGE 37

11 Gay-friendly theme park 12 Barely get, with “out” 13 Born, in gay Paree 21 How punctual people come 22 Pop of pop 25 Sibling issue 26 Removing a fruit center, e.g.

27 Homophobic type of therapy 29 Some have it to grind 30 Quo ___?

32 Drink from the land of the samurai 33 The Oscars, e.g.

35 Baylor’s city 36 First ____ 40 Like a pirate insignia 42 Chains around a knight 45 Hansberry’s wrinkled fruit 49 Cheek 50 Look from Snidely 52 My Own Private ___ 54 Good buddy 55 Features of Disney’s Dumbo 56 2012 Ben Affleck movie 57 Tin Woodsman’s rust source 58 Bunch of stallions 59 It swallows plastic 60 Hindu title of respect

36 | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | MARKETPLACE

Qsaltlake.com |

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NOVEMBER 21, 2019 |

MARKETPLACE | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | 37

ISSUE 306 | Qsaltlake.com

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38 | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | QMMUNITY

Qmmunity Groups BUSINESS

LGBTQ-Affirmative Psycho-therapists Guild of Utah  lgbtqtherapists.com * jim@lgbtqtherapists.com Utah Gay & Lesbian Chamber of Commerce  utahgaychamber.com * info@utahgaychamber.com LGBT & Allied Lawyers of Utah  lgbtutahlawyers.com * lgbtutahlawyers@gmail.com Utah Independent Business Coalition  utahindependentbusiness.org 801-879-4928 DOMESTIC VIOLENCE

National Domestic Violence Hotline 1-800-799-7233 YWCA of Salt Lake  ywca.org/saltlakecity 322 E 300 S 801-537-8600 HEALTH & HIV

Peer Support for Mental Illness — PSMI Thurs 7pm, Utah Pride Ctr Planned Parenthood 654 S 900 E 800-230-PLAN Salt Lake County Health Dept HIV/STD Clinic 660 S 200 E, 4th Floor Walk-ins M–F 10a–4p Appts 385-468-4242 Utah AIDS Foundation  utahaids.org * mail@utahaids.org 1408 S 1100 E 801-487-2323

Weber-Morgan Health Mon., Weds 1-4:30p 477 23rd St, Ogden Appt 801-399-7250 HOMELESS SVCS

VOA Homeless Youth Resource Ctr, ages 15–21 880 S 400 W 801-364-0744 Transition Homes: Young Men’s 801-433-1713 Young Women’s 801-359-5545 LEGAL

Rainbow Law Free Clinic 2nd Thurs 6:30–7:30pm UofU Law School, 383 S University St POLITICAL

Equality Utah  equalityutah.org * info@equalityutah.org 175 W 200 S, Ste 1004 801-355-3479 Utah Libertarian Party 6885 S State St #200 888-957-8824 Utah Log Cabin Republicans  bit.ly/logcabinutah 801-657-9611 Utah Stonewall Democrats  utahstonewalldemocrats.org  fb.me/ utahstonewalldems RELIGIOUS

First Baptist Church  firstbaptist-slc.org * office@firstbaptistslc.org 11a Sundays 777 S 1300 E 801-582-4921 Sacred Light of Christ  slcchurch.org 823 S 600 E 801-595-0052 11a Sundays

Qsaltlake.com |

Wasatch Metropolitan Community Church  wasatchmcc.org 801-889-8764 Sundays except the 2nd Sunday, 11:15a at Crone’s Hollow, 3834 S. Main SOCIAL

1 to 5 Club (bisexual)  fb.me/1to5ClubUtah  1to5club@

utahpridecenter.org

Alternative Garden Club  bit.ly/altgarden * altgardenclub@gmail.com blackBOARD Men’s Kink/Sex/BDSM education, 1st, 3rd Mons.  blackbootsslc.org blackBOOTS Kink/BDSM Men’s leather/kink/ fetish/BDSM 4th Sats.  blackbootsslc.org Gay Writes writing group, DiverseCity 6:30 pm 2nd, 4th Mondays, Community Writing Ctr, 210 E 400 S Men Who Move  menwhomove.org OWLS of Utah (Older, Wiser, Lesbian. Sisters)  bit.ly/owlsutah qVinum Wine Tasting  qvinum.com Sage Utah, Seniors  fb.me/sageutah  sageutah@ utahpridecenter.org 801-557-9203 Temple Squares Square Dance Club  templesquares.org 801-449-1293 Utah Bears  utahbears.com  fb.me/utahbears  info@utahbears.com

Weds 6pm Raw Bean Coffee, 611 W Temple Utah Male Naturists  umen.org  info@umen.org Utah Pride Center  utahpridecenter.org  info@utahpridecenter.org 1380 S Main St 801-539-8800 Venture OUT Utah  bit.ly/GetOutsideUtah SPORTS

QUAC — Queer Utah Aquatic Club  quacquac.org  questions@ quacquac.org Salt Lake Goodtime Bowling League  bit.ly/slgoodtime Stonewall Sports SLC  fb.me/SLCStonewall  stonewallsaltlakecity. leagueapps.com 385-243-1828 Utah Gay Football League  UtahGayFootballLeague.com  fb.me/UtahGayFootballLeague Venture Out Utah  facebook.com/groups/ Venture.OUT.Utah SUPPORT

Alcoholics Anonymous 801-484-7871  utahaa.org LGBT meetings: Sun. 3p Acceptance Group, UPC,1380 S Main Tues. 8:15p Live & Let Live, Mt Tabor Lutheran, 175 S 700 E Wed. 7p Sober Today, 375 Harrison Blvd, Ogden Fri. 8p Stonewall Group, Mt Tabor Lutheran, 175 S 700 E

ISSUE 306 | November 21, 2019

Crystal Meth Anon  crystalmeth.org Sun. 1:30pm Clean, Sober & Proud LGBTQIA+Straight USARA, 180 E 2100 S LifeRing Secular Recovery 801-608-8146  liferingutah.org Sun. 10am Univ. Neuropsychiatric Institute, 501 Chipeta Way #1566 Thurs. 7pm, USARA, 180 E 2100 S, #100 Sat. 11am, First Baptist Church, 777 S 1300 E Men’s Support Group  utahpridecenter. org/programs/lgbtqadults/  joshuabravo@ utahpridecenter.org Survivors of Suicide Attempt  bit.ly/upc_sosa  sosa@ utahpridecenter.org Trans Adult Support  utahpridecenter.org/ programs/lgbtq-adults/  lanegardinier@ utahpridecenter.org TransAction  utahpridecenter.org/ programs/transaction/ Sundays 2–3:30pm Women’s Support Group  utahpridecenter.org/ programs/lgbtq-adults/  mariananibley@ utahpridecenter.org Youth Support Group ages 10-14, 14-20  utahpridecenter. org/programs/youthfamily-programs/

Youth Survivors of Suicide Attempt  utahpridecenter.org/ programs/youth-familyprograms/  youthsosa@ utahpridecenter.org YOUTH/COLLEGE

Encircle LGBTQ Family and Youth Resource Ctr  encircletogether.org fb.me/encircletogether 91 W 200 S, Provo, Families Like Ours (ages 2-10)  utahpridecenter.org/ programs/youth-familyprograms/ Gay-Straight Alliance Network  gsanetwork.org Salt Lake Community College LGBTQ+ 8 slcc.edu/lgbtq/ University of Utah LGBT Resource Center 8 lgbt.utah.edu 200 S Central Campus Dr Rm 409 801-587-7973 USGA at BYU  usgabyu.com  fb.me/UsgaAtByu Utah State Univ. Access & Diversity Ctr  inclusion.usu.edu/ lgbtqa Utah Valley Univ Spectrum  facebook.com/ groups/uvuspectrum Weber State University LGBT Resource Center  weber.edu/ lgbtresourcecenter 801-626-7271 Youth Activity Night ages 10-14, 14-20  utahpridecenter.org/ programs/youth-familyprograms/

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NOVEMBER 21, 2019 |

BOOK REVIEW | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | 39

ISSUE 306 | Qsaltlake.com

the bookworm sez REVIEW BY TERRI SCHILCHENMEYER

Toil & Trouble

BY AUGUSTEN BURROUGHS C.2019, ST. MARTIN’S PRESS, $27.99, 320 PAGES

Halloween is over this year, but not for you.

Your decorations are still up because the season is young.

There’s plenty of time left for skeletons, monsters, and wind that howls like a banshee. You can still hear spirits high-stepping in your upstairs. Most important of all: as in the new book, Toil & Trouble by Augusten Burroughs, witches walk among us.

At just eight years old, Augusten Burroughs learned that he was a witch.

Riding the bus home from school, he’d had the sudden

q scopes DECEMBER

BY SAM KELLEY-MILLS

ARIES March 20–April 19

There is not much activity going yet and boredom has a way of creating false problems to worry about.

Avoid creating conflict with others and keep perceptions in check. The holidays will bring you face to face with family. Do your best to avoid drama.

Alone time works when imagination is used.

TAURUS Apr 20–May 20

Someone at work or school needs help. Do something to help perk them up and find a return gift as a result. Be cautious of providing too much help to someone you don’t like much. They may develop excessive expectations. It helps to be good at what you do, but don’t compromise.

GEMINI May 21–June 20

It’s time to receive some good stuff and give as well. Don’t fear taking action and have a good time. A fight may cause pain and pain can spread. A personal matter

realization that something happened to his grandmother; he knew without knowing, saw without seeing, and he rushed to his mother in a panic. Matter-of-factly, she calmed him; she was a witch, too, and had sensed that her younger son had the “Gift.”

“It was the strongest bond my mother and I had when I was young…” Burroughs says.

Most people think of Hollywood magic or crones on brooms when they think of witches but those are just myths, he says. The truth comes in three parts: witches have existed for as long as have humans. They’ve “always been misunderstood.” And yes, “witches are real,” and each is a little different, as Burroughs learned when his Aunt Curtis (a witch) introduced him to a root woman (another witch) who told him something about his future.

Witchcraft isn’t perfect, though. It didn’t help much while Burroughs was bullied

as a boy. Sometimes, spells took longer to work than he hoped they might. It isn’t for revenge or hurtful purposes, although there is a way to influence how things turn out and patience is key. “Magick” worked when he wanted to move from Manhattan to his beloved New England; it didn’t work when he wanted to talk to a friend on the phone. It warned him of a possibly-bad situation near his new home, but there were no details. It helps find lost objects, but not lost confidence.

And when his magick went missing as his husband fell seriously ill, Burroughs learned that “Things are not as they appear. They are much, much more.”

When starting “Toil & Trouble, you could be forgiven for thinking that author Augusten Burroughs is pulling your leg. He does, after all, write with humor and this witch stuff is conjured, right?

Isn’t it?

should keep it close to home. There is confusion regarding a family matter. By sorting things out, gratitude will come.

main focus, there is not much point in continuing.

CANCER June 21–July 22

It is a happy time. The temperatures fall but you will rise. All the ingredients for happiness are here. Be creative and don’t worry about making a mess. An important person will ask for some help regarding an issue that makes you uneasy. Smile, nod, but move them right along.

LEO July 23–August 22

LIBRA Sept 23–October 22

It is possible to fall and get up, but the pain of doing so should be avoided. There seems to be some confusion over what is really important. Step back from a situation and revisit when the dust has settled.

Personal matters suck, but sucking can become amazing if you try hard enough.

SCORPIO Oct. 23–Nov. 21

There is always someone to compete with. Balance modesty and pride to look your best. Cheer and satisfaction can come in the form of a great and intimate interaction, leading to some very pleasing results.

It might not be the best time to figure out yourself, so reflect and simply enjoy.

What makes sense to you baffles someone else. Don’t let this discrepancy become an issue. Agree to disagree. Much can be learned from alternate perspectives. Get behind this person and see life from their point of view. But don’t spend too much time back there. You risk losing yourself.

VIRGO August 23–Sep. 22

Nov. 22–December 20.

Priorities are good to have, don’t allow them to trap you in a method that isn’t working. Adapt and do what the moment requires. A relationship is in trouble. Take time to simply enjoy this person, and make them enjoy you too! If fun is not the

SAGITTARIUS

A vital task feels like pushing a hard rock uphill. Break up a burden and tackle it a little bit at a time. Consider whether it is worth the effort.

Examine a clear goal and make changes.

The heart may break but it is better to get priorities figured out now and not

After a few more pages, it won’t matter.

You’ll be so enAugusten Burroughs grossed by Photo: AXB this tale of the magick of life and so caught up in the stories Burroughs tells, that witchcraft really becomes no big deal, no less normal than blue eyes or brown hair. And while it’s the main reason for this book and everything attached to it, it’s more of a magically delightful, meaningful backdrop for tales of family, growing up gay, falling in love with a man, finding home, and forgiving.

Toil & Trouble is not a darkand-stormy-night kind of book, and it won’t make you jumpy. There are, however, a few hair-raising pages that’ll make you squirm but mostly, it’s funny and sweet and charming, a cauldron full of goodness. Q halfway up the hill.

CAPRICORN Dec 21–Jan 19

There is never a perfect situation, no matter how amazing a change may seem at the time. Don’t be quick to go back to an old way of doing something. There is always a reason for your actions, even if you don’t understand the choice at the time. It can take time for things to feel right.

AQUARIUS Jan. 20–Feb. 18

Romantic feelings could develop with a co-worker or casual friend. Not much has changed, but a little change in the heart can create a big difference. Put faith in feelings and don’t fear to explore a new outlook.

Life is about change, even when the routines seem to be the same.

PISCES Feb 19–Mar 19

It could be hard learning skills needed to overcome a problem. Don’t fear to ask for help from a buddy. Learn new ways to accomplish goals. A financial situation takes a toll. Spend wisely during this time. Luckily, your wish list is on the light side, so hold off on big purchases until later. Q

40 | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | TRAVEL

Qsaltlake.com |

Fun in the Sun awaits LGBTQ travelers in Puerto Vallarta

BY JERRY JONES, NEMA NEWS NETWORK

Having

been recognized as having some of the best “gay beaches” in the world, Puerto Vallarta opens her arms to LGBTQ travelers as one of the most welcoming destinations on Mexico’s Pacific Coast.

If travelers have not considered a vacation to Puerto Vallarta and its world-famous beaches before, this winter might just be a perfect time.

Puerto Vallarta is a jewel of a historical city cradled between the Bay of Banderas

Online and at over 350 locations across the Wasatch Front

and the Sierra Madre Occidental mountains. A combination of colonial Mexican charm and barefoot beach escapes, Puerto Vallarta is one of the best destinations in Mexico for visitors who truly want to “have it all” on vacation.

From the beaches in the Hotel Zone to downtown, the Zona Romantica (which some refer to as the Gayborhood) and beyond, there is no shortage of fantastic coastal access in Puerto Vallarta for the perfect beach holiday.

In the Hotel Zone, visitors will find side-by-side beaches that stretch along the

We also have wedding offciants

Advertise at 801.997.9763

ISSUE 306 | November 21, 2019

all-inclusive properties, ideal for taking picture-perfect sunbaths, enjoying an afternoon cocktail or taking a sunset selfie.

Puerto Vallarta is the only destination in Mexico where the historical colonial city center meets the sea. The bohemian ZONA ROMANTICA offers some of the most beautiful beaches in the city. Playa Los Muertos — lined by beach clubs, bars, and restaurants — is always happening.

By day, the beach is alive with activity, day parties and boat trips departing from iconic LOS MUERTOS PIER. By night, a visit to this section of town immerses visitors in Puerto Vallarta’s eclectic gastronomic scene and high-energy, electric nightlife.

Puerto Vallarta is the most popular gay beach destination in Mexico and its LGBTQ popularity continues to grow. If you want to hang at the gay beach (just south of the famous Playa Los Muertos Pier), you can check-in at one of the exclusive LGBT Beach clubs that front the gay beach area, or just lay a towel on the sand for free. BLUE CHAIRS, SAPPHIRE OCEAN CLUB, RITMOS BEACH CLUB (often referred to as ‘green chairs’), and MANTAMAR BEACH CLUB, a favorite of actress Zendaya, all offer drink, food and chair options for LGBTQ beachgoers.

THE GAYBORHOOD (Zona Romantica) in Puerto Vallarta comes together at the intersection of Lazaro Cardenas and Ignacio L. Vallarta. Multiple gay bars and nightclubs are in a block radius of that crossing. Try the VALLARTA GAY BAR HOPPING TOUR for an easy lay of the land. Two new upscale gay nightclubs opened just this past year, CODE, and INDUSTRY, which bills itself as Puerto Vallarta’s largest gay nightclub. Industry is next to what may be the city’s second-largest gay nightclub, CC SLAUGHTERS. MR. FLAMINGOS and LA MARGARITA BAR are smaller but popular bars in the area and LA NOCHE’s private atmosphere made it Tamar Braxton’s spot to go while she was in town filming Braxton Family Values. REINAS, which means Queens, is devoted to all things royal as you will see from the decor. The newer ELLA BAR, gives you “Divas” throughout the decades from Ella Fitzgerald and Barbara Streisand to Whitney Houston and Mariah Carey, along with delicious tapas.

Puerto Vallarta also has its share of great LGBTQ hotels, including HOTEL MERCURIO, CASA CUPULA, and

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ISSUE 306 | Qsaltlake.com

PINATA PV, all of which are gay-owned.

The hotels are all within easy walking distance to the gay beach. Two other hotels are right at the gay beach — BLUE CHAIRS, which sits on the gay beach, and Mantamar Beach Club, part of ALMAR RESORT right up the hill. TOP SKY BAR on (surprise) the top floor of Almar has views as incredible as their food and creative drinks. Their house talent, SASSY QUEENS, is top notch entertainment.

Moving south from Zona Romantica, travelers will discover more of Puerto Vallarta’s “hidden” beaches, frequented mostly by locals or travelers in the know. PLAYA LAS GEMELAS, or “The Twins Beach,” is a pair of small beaches just a few miles from downtown. These quiet, off-the-radar strands are known for turquoise waters, gentle waves and crisp, white sand — the latter a rarity in Puerto Vallarta, renowned for the warm golden sands of most of its beaches.

The gay-friendly COSTA SUR RESORT AND SPA provides great access to these beaches.

Another picture-postcard beach on the south side of the city is CONCHAS CHINAS, also heralded for its turquoise water and sugary sand. Visitors love this beach for the rock formations that create fun pools of water. This is a very glamorous part of town, so be on the lookout for the gorgeous mansions up in the hills, or A-list weddings down on the shorefront.

Model Tess Holiday fell in love with Conchas Chinas and made it the location for her cover shoot with Nylon magazine this year, completely worth the extra effort.

Pamper yourself and rent a private yacht to enjoy a day on the BAY OF BANDERAS and access some of Puerto Vallarta’s most secluded beaches. The most popular is PLAYA LAS ANIMAS, a remote stretch of sand that’s one of the most famous in all of southern Puerto Vallarta — and entirely worth a day trip.

It’s packed with restaurants and bars perfect for spending the day lounging underneath the palm fronds of a traditional palapa shelter, frosty margarita firmly in hand. Visitors can rent paddleboards, take banana boat rides, snorkel or simply relax on one of the many lounge chairs that line the shore.

LAS ANIMAS can be the starting point from which to explore some other hidden beaches, such as EL CABALLO BEACH — a hidden oasis of calm, clear water and bleached sand with just a single bungalow-style hotel and beach restaurant/bar.

Another such hideaway is COLOMITOS

TRAVEL | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | 41

BEACH, a small strand fringed in the greens and blues of the jungle-covered mountains above it and the rolling waves gently lapping against its sands.

One stop farther lies the private paradise cove of YELAPA, where attraction and activities include not only the fantastic beach but jungle hikes to a stunning nearby waterfall. This safe, beautiful walk to the falls takes about 30 to 40 minutes and ends at a refreshing natural pool perfect for a refreshing dip. While Yelapa makes for a wonderful day trip, those looking for a wellness retreat should consider the XINALANI or stay the night at the gay-owned CASA PERICOS and enjoy the area’s other attractions including Rolling Stone magazine’s favorite LOS CHICOS BEACH CLUB. Another way to access the distant beaches is to take one of the many LGBTQ boat tours available.

DIANA’S TOURS, run by Diana DeCosta, a Canadia expat lesbian, boat excursion is an LGBTQ favorite. The tour runs every Thursday and includes a continental breakfast and stop for a beachfront lunch. The first stop is at Puerto Vallarta’s famed LOS ARCOS — giant rocks with hollow swim-through passages. Diana’s Thursday tours are made up mostly of gay men but are also straight-friendly.

The WET AND WILD tour is marketed to gay men, and, as the name implies, is a sexually-charged version of Diana’s cruise.

JET’S PRIVATE BOARD TOURS is also a LGBTQ favorite and also offers special NUDE CRUISES, and you can request a gay tour guide.

So, no matter your vibe — from peaceand-quiet to maximum-party-and-adrenaline — Puerto Vallarta has the gorgeous beach to match. There’s no time like the present to start discovering the beauty of what the beaches of Puerto Vallarta have to offer. Q

42 | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | QMMUNITY

Matrons of Mayhem raise $10,500 for Camp Hobé Summer Camp for Kids with Cancer PHOTOS BY BRAD MONTGOMERY

On one November Friday evening at First Baptist Church, camp drag troupe Matrons of Mayhem broke their record for most money raised for a charity ... by double.

The crowd was all-in as the packed Keck Hall buzzed with the energy of wanting to empty their pockets for a great cause — Camp Hobé, a summer camp for kids with cancer and similar illnesses. The camp serves more than 250 kids and teens each year.

Bingo boards cost $6 or two for $10. But the lion’s share of the night’s proceeds came from playful “party fouls” — for such aggregious crimes as being too cute, inappropriate leering at the queens, or whatever the queens decide. They are always judge and jury.

Drag Queen Bingo raises tens of thousands of dollars each year for a multitude of charities on the third Friday of every month except December. All queens are waaaaay too busy with parties and cotillions in December. First Baptist Church, 777 S. 1300 East starting promptly-ish at 7pm.

Info at fb.me/matronsofmayhem

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44 | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | FRIVOLIST

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the frivolist

BY MIKEY ROX

4

(seemingly) money-savings habits that can bleed you dry

Saving money

is a crucial aspect of financial planning. When we’re conscious of our spending habits, we’re able to make better decisions to build bigger cash reserves and prepare for the fu-ture. There are lots of ways to save — but sometimes our savings strategies end up costing us more. Nip these four in the bud right now.

1

Opening a store credit card to snag a discount

Many retailer credit cards feature enticing rewards programs that allow consumers to save on immediate, same-day purchases, and as a card member you’re probably entitled to exclusive dis-counts in the future. However, if the only reason you’re applying for the card is to score a dis-count on that day’s shopping spree (at a store you don’t frequent often), think again.

The opportunity to save on a purchase may seem like a good enough reason to apply, but unless you pay off the purchase in full by the next month, you’ll pay interest on the items you bought. And unfortunately, store credit cards have higher interest rates than most major credit cards, which means that purchase could end up costing more than your discount, especially if it was a smallish charge. The hard inquiry on your credit during the approval process may affect your credit score as well. Not worth the 10% to 20% on the first day’s savings if you’re not making a major purchase and planning to settle up 100% when the bill is due.

cash in a traditional 2 Stashing savings account

Maintaining and contributing to a savings account makes good financial sense,

but don’t count on it to grow your net worth. In fact, you’d be lucky to find a regular savings account paying an interest rate of more than 0.01% APR — which is right next to nothing. Even if you find a savings account earning slightly more, the monthly maintenance fee can chip at your earnings or cost more than your account earns.

Consider your options then. You’ll make out better opening a high-interest online-only savings account or exploring other options like a certificate of deposit or a money market account. These savings solutions pay a higher interest rate, which is exactly what you need to maximize your re-turns.

for a new car 3 Overpaying that depreciates immediately

New cars are beyond the average person’s ability to pay in cash, so financing is necessary — and that generally means you’ll need a loan. But loans are the last thing you want when trying to keep your debt in check.

Instead of trapping yourself in a fiveor six-year payoff schedule, save up and purchase an older car with cash. You won’t have to worry about a car payment or interest rates, and because the car’s older you’ll pay less in personal property taxes and insurance.

It’s a sensible approach, for sure, but only if you choose a vehicle wisely. In other words, don’t purchase the first car you find because you like the price tag.

Since the idea is to save money, have the car inspected by a trusted mechanic, and crunch some numbers on the cost of owning an older vehicle. If it’s not in the best condition, repairs could do you in more than the new vehicle would have.

Shop wisely.

Buying cheap health 4 limited insurance with coverage Health insurance is an expensive and necessary evil that’s not getting any cheaper, and the bot-tom line here is that you cannot afford to be without coverage. Even if you can’t swing the best health plan, some coverage is better than none.

Choosing a health plan because it’s the cheapest saves money on a monthly basis, but if you get a plan that doesn’t provide the coverage you need, you’ll end up paying more out-of-pocket for co-pays, deductibles, coinsurance, prescription drugs, and more over its lifetime. This doesn’t mean you have to purchase a plan that leaves you bankrupt. But you should seriously evaluate your healthcare needs before signing off on a plan and buy as much coverage as you can afford.

One trip to the hospital on a junk plan could leave you in debt for years or even decades, but that fate is avoidable. Q Mikey Rox is an award-winning journalist and LGBT lifestyle expert whose work has been pub-lished in more than 100 outlets across the world. He spends his time writing from the beach with his dog Jaxon. Connect with Mikey on Instagram @mikeyroxtravels.

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A&E | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | 45

JOHNNY HEBDA IS PATRICK BATEMAN

BOOK BY

ROBERTO AGUIRRE-SACASA (Chilling Adventures of Sabrina) MUSIC & LYRICS BY

DUNCAN SHEIK

(Tony-Winning Spring Awakening)

"A carnal carnival of song and dance.”

- The New York Times "American Psycho slays onstage!"

- The Associated Press

Nov. 30 - Dec. 15, 2019

Regent Street Black Box at Eccles Theater

www.arttix.org, • ArtTix Locations 801-355-ARTS or 888-451-ARTS A PRESENTATION OF

46 | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | FINAL WORD

Qsaltlake.com |

ISSUE 306 | November 21, 2019

the perils of petunia pap smear

A tale of a locomotion

BY PETUNIA PAP SMEAR

The road

to Disneyland is fraught with danger

and excitement.

Please allow me to continue telling you about my trip to Disneyland with the Salt Lake Men’s Choir I began last month.

For those of you who know me, you know that I have very bad back pain and cannot stand long or walk far when I’m not wearing a titanium-reinforced corset.

Now, since I’m a significantly “gravity enhanced” queen, the corset, while accentuating my breasticles nicely, tends to make it so I can’t breathe, so I pass out.

Consequently, wearing it while riding the Big Thunder Mountain Railroad might be problematic. Foreseeing that all the Disney Princes plus the Seven Dwarfs together would not be able to lift an unconscious sumo-sized buffet queen out of the train, I rented a mobility scooter for the weekend so I could get around and keep up with the rest of the choir boys. I was cautioned by the scooter people not to overload the machine, therefore since I am taller lying down than standing up, it was necessary for me to order a “heavy-duty” scooter. Oh, the shame!

When we arrived at the hotel, a scooter was waiting for me. I hopped on and quickly sped around the hotel parking lot three times to get a feel for how to drive the thing. Then I headed back into the lobby and to the elevator to go up to my room so as to change from my traveling frock into a princess dress fit to meet Cinderella. Unthinkingly, I left the scooter in high gear and crashed into the back of the elevator. I tried to make a three-point turn, and after several more crashes I ended up wedging myself ever so tightly between the scooter and the door, leaving a massive lipstick smear on the door as it slid open.

Once I pried myself from the lift, I signed into my GPS and learned that the Disney entrance was in reality, 1.3 miles from the hotel. Good thing I had planned on the scooter. Because the scooter was

a “heavy-duty” model, it looked ever so much like a tow-truck, very practical and functional, but it totally failed the style vs. substance test. Miss Vida Boheme would be ever so displeased.

Therefore, I set to work with some duct tape (every queen worth her tiara should always carry a roll of the magical stuff in her purse) and affixed my brightest pair of flashing breasticles to the front of the scooter, and draped a stylish feather boa around the handlebars. I quickly put on my opera length driving gloves, made sure my beehive hair was sufficiently cemented down with Aqua-Net, and we were off.

In the hotel lobby, as I was trying to catch up to fellow Matron of Mayhem Liberty Belle, I accidentally ran her over.

She ended up with her face wedged firmly between the breasticles on the front of the scooter as if she were “motorboating” them. The rest of the choir boys, seeing disaster in the making, quickly jumped into action to rescue Ms. Belle. Fortuitously, I had my purse with me. I withdrew a crowbar and Vaseline (that I use to wedge myself into the corset and remove myself from elevators) from my bag. We used them to grease Liberty up and safely pry her from between my nipples.

This situation certainly would not do. I decided to make some modifications to my ride. I removed one breasticle, therefore the remaining single breasticle could function as an old-fashioned cowcatcher to deflect any children and or princesses from inhibiting my forward movement. One of the choir boys remarked that with my beehive hair sticking up like a smokestack, in silhouette, I strongly resembled a steam locomotive.

We all set off down the sidewalk toward the main gate. On the scooter, I was easily able to outpace the rest of the choir boys and leave them in the dust. I began racing with choir director Dennis McCracken, who also had a scooter. I sped over a bump in the

pavement and the resulting jolt dislodged an “air biscuit” from my buttockus rotundus causing me to momentarily speed even faster as if the scooter were jumping into hyperspace. Oh, I am ready for Space Mountain!

After a full day of scooting all around Tomorrowland and Fantasyland, we were returning the 1.3 miles to the hotel and the battery pack on my scooter gave out. I was left, stranded, motionless, unable to progress. Luckily for me, Dennis came along on his scooter and I asked him to give me a push. It worked for about a block, then his battery started to give out because of the added strain. By then Liberty Belle and the rest of the choir boys had caught up to us.

They ended up pushing Dennis who kept pushing me, in a big line down the street.

Just like a train. Reflexively, I began a queenly parade wave to curious onlookers as if this was all planned.

This story leaves us with several important questions: 1. While Liberty Belle was trapped with her face in my breasticles, I became moist. Was that from nervous sweating, or were my mammary glands getting all maternal at the proximity to a mouth?

2. Should I develop a line of bedazzled crowbars?

3. Was my “air biscuit” the source of the Santa Ana winds that fanned the recent wildfires in California?

4. When I rode Big Thunder Mountain Railroad, was the crashing sound we heard a recording of thunder or the cracking of the track beneath my significant butticus rotundus?

5. Since I resembled a steam locomotive, would anyone notice if I replaced the Big Thunder Mountain Railroad?

6. Should I begin greeting people by saying Choo Choo?

These and other eternal questions will be answered in future chapters of The Perils of Petunia Pap Smear. Q

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