Radical Self Respect. Setting our Boundaries and Knowing our Non-Negotiables

Excerpt from Chapter in “30 Days to Transformation”

by Carolina M. Billings

Radical Self-Respect is about changing our mindsets and how we view our lives. It is about taking ownership and responsibility for how we treat ourselves and how we let other people treat us. It is understood that if we are constantly being mistreated, we are cooperatng with the treatment. I hear many people complain that they would do anything for others, but they rarely get the same treatment.

Oddly enough, setng boundaries begins within. Boundaries are about what you choose to let into your life, whom you chose to let into your life and the experiences and life you choose to live.

Resources, Relationships, Self-Development and Self-Maintenance

The old master’s teachings, even afer two and a half thousand years, are worldrenowned, studied and practsed by millions around the world. Refectng and beginning to know who you are through the four fundamental areas of life, helps to understand not only who you are, but what you want and do not want to have in your life. Afer all, you are 100% in control of your mind, body and spirit.

Number One: Resources.

Having your resources at peace is like stretching a bow. The high is lowered, the low is raised, the excess is reduced, and the defciency is replenished. The Way reduces the excess and replenishes defciency. People’s way is ofen not so.

Flow and Balance

The concept of balancing the complementary parts can be applied to the subject of resource management. We have to make sure we don’t use too much of one resource at the expense of another.

When you use your talents in your job to excess, you get promoted, and you enjoy doing overtme at work, doing what you love, but you completely ignore your health. You don’t take your tme to replenish your physical power in the long run. This can be very detrimental and can even shorten your life. If you use one resource to excess, you create disharmony in the universe.

Number Two: Relationships

Living in harmony means doing no harm and, moreover, nurturing, protectng, and contributng to the well-being of everything around you. As all humans are part of this universe, we have to see others as our extended family. We have to take care of each other.

“No person is an island, and being happy has much to do with the relationship between you and what surrounds you.”

Scientfc studies prove the importance of having a healthy social life. For example, a Harvard study on adult development found that good relatonships are the key factors that mater most for long-lastng happiness. Good relatonships keep us happier and healthier. One of the most important ways to achieve lifelong happiness is to focus on meaningful relatonships and on trying to improve or eliminate the bad relatonships in our lives.

Number Three: Self-Development lovingly protectng that border -- is what makes a naton a sovereign, independent naton. Whenever we travel, we always pass through border control. The ofcers are generally kind but frm (to me, anyway). Kindness and frmness: the two greatest qualites of a boss boundary seter.

Self-mastery plays a major key in people who spend enough tme working on selfdevelopment and self-mastery to understand themselves in a beter way. They can control their thoughts. They know how to avoid negatve thinking. And they know how to learn from their mistakes.

Chances are you need to set some boundaries in your own life right now. Maybe you need to delineate what you will and will not accept in your personal life or professional life. Perhaps you need to be clearer about what you will and will not tolerate from family members, clients, team members, etc.

Number Four: Self-Maintenance

“How you treat yourself is teaching others how they can treat you”

The human body is said to have its own energy patern, which is known as Zang Fu. The Zang Fu model has partcular organs that correspond to the fve elements; wood, fre, earth, metal, and water. The organs have Yin and Yang propertes (energies) assigned which, if not balanced, will result in partcular illnesses to keep the Yin and Yang energies in balance.

Putting it all together

To really start to implement this way of living I would love for you to consider three exercises. Past, Present, and Future.

Journaling & Self-Discovery Exercise #3. From now on…

6 Words To Help You Set Better Boundaries

Setng stronger boundaries is central to strong leadership and your ability to reign as sovereign queen of your own life. Think about it: having a border -- and

In other words -- to reach your next level of success, you may need to become your own border control ofcer from tme to tme.

When that tme comes, I have 6 words which -- when used in this exact order -- allow you to frmly and elegantly set boundaries, enforce them, and actvate your power as sovereign queen of your own life and person.

Here they are:

That does not work for me.

A simple, straightforward phrase you can use anytime to firmly and respectfully set a boundary.

That does not work for me. No apology. Instead… “but this will” after all, every non-negotiable ought to have a negotiable on your own terms.

For the full chapter and all three exercises click here:

US - click here Canada - click here

My favorite pair of socks have an important message. They boldly tell anyone who sees my ankles: I’m silently correctng your grammar.

Yes. I’m one of those people. The people who wince when you say “between you and I” or “mis-chee-vee-ous’ or “me and him” are going to the store.

It’s not a superiority thing – a point of contenton between my husband and me (see what I did there?) – instead, it is about taking ownership of your message and being the best version of yourself you can be.

The quality of your messaging is what separates the women from the girls. When you are clear, concise, and you speak to your intended audience in a way they understand, you can create a community of raving fans who will happily buy your books, products, and services. Why? Because you get them. Even more importantly, you will be making this world a beter place because you will be sharing your incredible mission and vision with those around you.

I have been preparing for this role as Powerful Women Today Magazine Editor in one form or another for my entre career. Back in the aughts, I was walking red carpets with celebrites, writng press releases, and pitching stories to media outlets. Afer completng a master’s degree in Broadcast Journalism at the University of Southern California, I set to work as a news anchor and reporter on the radio then worked as a newspaper reporter.

The next step in my career won’t sound like a logical trajectory: I became an entrepreneur and designed and manufactured breasteeding clothing which sold on Nordstrom.com, Amazon, and at boutques across North America. Now as a book marketng strategist for nonfcton and children’s book authors, I help coaches, speakers, and consultants grow their audiences, make more money, and make a big impact with their book.

At Powerful Women Today Magazine, our mission is to elevate the conversaton and empower our readers to feel like the world changers you are.

Cheers, Melanie

Connect with Melanie: htps://www. linkedin.com/in/melanie-herschorn/