“I remember that, being a child, I was afraid of clowns and, above all, I feared that my parents would take us every year to the circus that came to town during the local holidays. I would not say it was a phobia, even though, instead of smiling at the grotesque makeup and appearance of the clowns, I felt something more than anguish to the fearing of being attacked by those crazy clowns.
One day, even, I escaped the vigilance of my parents when getting into the circus and ran as fast as I could to where I thought there was a safe exit. Unfortunately, I fell into some kind of a tent where, horror!!!, there were the troop of clowns dressing up for the show. Terrified, I started looking for a way out when I encountered a clown still without makeup that turned out to be the most beautiful and handsome man I had ever seen.
Since then, I did not want to hide myself from the clowns and I discovered what would scare me from that moment on, and that it would have more to do with my sexual orientation and how to hide it from others than with my childhood phobias.
After a failed marriage of convenience and two broken relationships with wonderful men, I find myself now in front of a circus in the vain hope that behind the makeup of s o m e o f t h e c l o w n s I c o u l d f i n d t h e l o v e o f m y l i f e .�