Mirror, Mirror: What Makes You Beautiful?

MIRROR WHAT MAKES YOU BEAUTIFUL?

Lela came home from school crying. She was being bullied online and in person by some of her classmates. They called her names like “bamboo stick� and laughed at her for being too thin. In fact, Lela suffered from an illness that made it almost impossible for her to put on weight. No matter how much rice she ate, she just stayed skinny.

Trying hard to be “beautiful”, Lela kept eating more and more. Then, her metabolism started to change. Suddenly, she began to put on weight quickly. Within the space of two years, she went from a size 6 to a size 22.

Now, Lela was told she was fat. People around her joked about her size, and she found herself pressured to change herself again. She began dieting and exercising rigorously, but found it difficult to meet the standards of what people around her called “beautiful”. No matter what she did, it seemed, she would never be “good enough”. Would she ever be attractive enough to find a husband? Would she ever be accepted for who she was?

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Does Lela’s experience sound familiar to you?

Do you feel that you have to change who you are, just to be happy? Have you been teased about your size, your appearance, or the clothes you wear? Do you wonder if there is more to life than trying to force yourself into the ideal of “beautiful” to feel loved and accepted by others?

No matter what she did, she never felt like she was “good enough”.

The pursuit of beauty: HOW DO OTHERS SEE YOU? When I dated my first boyfriend, I tried to keep thin and never left the house without putting on make-up. After we broke up, he said he actually preferred me when I was a bit chubbier and had a “naked” face without any foundation, mascara, or lipstick. I didn’t realise that we had such different ideas of what beauty was. I thought I was trying to be beautiful for him, but he actually preferred me “ordinary”.

The dictionary says beauty comes from all the different qualities of a person or thing. Yet social media, magazines, and movies tend to focus only on the skin-deep aspects of beauty.

From young, we are told that women should be slim, pretty, and have perfect proportions. As a result, many of us come to believe that we need to look a certain way to be attractive. It not only puts pressure on us to fit in with the crowd, but also affects how we view ourselves.

In school, I was influenced by my friends’ efforts to be slim. Around the same time, my mother also began dieting. When she succeeded in losing weight, she received many compliments, which made me want to lose weight too. So I exercised obsessively, limited my calorie intake, and weighed myself every day.

Then, almost as if overnight, my body swelled up. I had no idea that my puffy face and bloating were actually due to an allergy to something I was eating. Until I received a diagnosis and was able to change my diet, all I saw in the mirror was a fat, lonely girl who was desperate to feel loved and accepted.

The passion of beauty: HOW DO YOU SEE YOURSELF? When you look in the mirror, how do you feel about your reflection?

In a survey of thousands of women around the world, more than half of teenage girls said they were not satisfied with their own body and looks. Most said they would not go out to meet people if they weren’t happy with the way they looked. And many believed they would not be as successful in life because they would not have the same opportunities and confidence that “better-looking” girls did.

This pursuit of physical perfection can affect the way we carry out our work, studies, sports, and even hobbies. When we try to gain the approval of others based on our outward appearance, it will never seem to be enough.

So we may avoid meeting people. This can lead to low self-esteem, fear of rejection, and even depression.

What lies at the core of these insecurities?

What are we trying to measure up to?

The problem with beauty: A TRUE REFLECTION Have you heard the fairy tale of Snow White and the seven dwarfs? In this children’s story, a beautiful but evil queen asks her magic mirror every day, “Mirror, mirror on the wall, who is the fairest of them all?” For many years, she is told that she is the most beautiful person in the land. But one day, the mirror suddenly gives a new answer: it is her step-daughter Snow White. Now, there’s more to the story, but what is significant is this: no matter how beautiful she is, the evil queen has to face the fact that her physical beauty is only temporary. Such beauty will not last forever.

Not only that, physical beauty is also subjective.

In some cultures, a fuller figure is seen as more desirable than a leaner one, because a well-fed woman is more likely to be wealthy, healthy, and of higher status than a thin one. Perhaps our concept of physical beauty is skewed because our understanding of beauty itself is flawed. Physical beauty—the shallow, skin-deep type—only captures a fraction of what makes you . . . you. It doesn’t reflect the qualities that make you unique or the really important things, like your character, personality, skills, and the way you care for those around you.

Being liked for how you look cannot bring you lasting joy. Why? Because your true value is not found in how you look. It is not found in the group you belong to, the number of followers you have on Instagram, or the size of your jeans. The truth is, you were made for something more. Much more.

Embroidery and photo by Elizabeth Mattson

The pursuit of true beauty: A NEW PERSPECTIVE You may never be perfect to others . . . but that’s okay. It’s okay because you are beautiful to one person: God, the one who created you. The Bible, on which the Christian faith is based, says that you are “fearfully and wonderfully made” by this Creator God (Psalm 139:14).

You are beautiful in God’s eyes because you were made in his likeness. He does not see or judge you as others do. Instead, he loves you as you are, for he has created you for a purpose.

And he is waiting to lead you on a journey to know true beauty and to understand how precious you are in his sight.

How can we know God and begin this journey?

The answer is: through his son Jesus Christ, who came to earth as a human being some

2,000 years ago. When Jesus came, he was more interested in those who were rejected by society and those who saw themselves as nothing, than in those who were popular and those who felt they were beautiful. What society rejected, Jesus saw as beautiful, because God had made them.

If you are searching for the beauty that the world pursues, it will leave you feeling inadequate and insecure. But if you discover the love of God shown through Jesus Christ, you will gain a new perspective of your true beauty and value as his special creation.

When you see yourself as God sees you, your understanding of beauty will also change. It will set you on the path of freedom to be who you are, not what is expected of you.

Lela still struggles with body image issues today, and so do I. However my perspective has changed since I came to realise that my looks matter to God in a different way. When I came to understand the depth of God’s goodness, love, and grace for me, I began to see the meaning of beauty in a whole new light. Sometimes, I still feel pressure to change how I look so that people will like me. But I know that I don’t need to change in order to be accepted by God, because He loves me just as I am.

When you discover the love of God shown through Jesus Christ, you will gain a new perspective of your true beauty and value as His special creation.

Psalm 139, a chapter in the Bible, gives me great assurance that I look uniquely beautiful to God:

For you created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother’s womb.

I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well.

My frame was not hidden from you when I was made in the secret place, when I was woven together in the depths of the earth.

Your eyes saw my unformed body; all the days ordained for me were written in your book before one of them came to be.

Would you like to know more about this God— this God who knows you and loves you just as you are?

Talk to a Christian friend and find out more about Jesus. Or take a look at A Story of Hope, a booklet that tells you a bit more about who Jesus is and what he has done for you.

You can read A Story of Hope online at: ourdailybread.org/resources/a-story-of-hope Or scan the QR Code here:

You can also contact us if you would like to receive a printed copy. See overleaf for contact details in your own country.

For more resources: odb.org For more articles by young people: ymi.today

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