The Miscellany News
Vassar College’s student newspaper of record since 1866
MAMDANI ELECTED NYC MAYOR
Mamdani secures over 50 percent of votes
From his acceptance speech: “The future is on our hands. My friends, we have toppled a political dynasty.”
Campus celebrates Mamdani mayoral victory
Concluding a mayoral race that generated widespread public discourse and drew international attention, Democratic nominee Zohran Mamdani was elected as the mayor of New York City, defeating former New York State Governor Andrew Cuomo and Republican Curtis Sliwa. On Vassar College’s campus, many students celebrated the results of the election, expressing excitement about Mamdani’s proposed policies and vision for New York City.
Mamdani, a state assemblyman for New York’s 36th district in Astoria, Queens, surprised Democrats when he beat Cuomo by 12 points in the Democratic primary, securing the party’s nomination. His victory
in the general election follows an extensive grassroots campaign, which included over 100,000 volunteers and an expansive social media presence. Mamdani’s campaign energized city residents as well as people around the world. He secured over 1 million votes in the general election, which had the city’s highest voter turnout in a mayoral election since 2001.
Mamdani collected endorsements from numerous federal, state and local officials. Vermont Senator Bernie Sanders and New York Representative Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez endorsed Mamdani in June, ahead of the primary election. New York Governor Kathy Hochul followed in September. On the other hand, House Minority Leader Hakeem Jeffries endorsed Mamdani only in late October. Senate Minority Lead-
Institute panel discusses community, honesty in media
“Journalismis an incredibly hard profession. I embrace people when they decide to come in because journalism is like long-term unrequited love. It will never love you as much as you love it,” Lynette Clemetson, the Charles R. Eisendrath Director of Knight-Wallace Fellowships for Journalists at the University of Michigan, explained to a crowd of Vassar students, faculty and community members. She continued, “You can produce something that causes legislation or influences policy, and it will still be like: ‘What do you have next?’ It wears you down.”
Clemetson was one of three media makers featured in the “How Media Illuminates Critical Stories and Perspectives” panel. This segment was held on day two of the “Storytelling for Change: Shaping and Sharing Inclusive Narratives in Higher Education, Media, and the Arts” Signature Program at The Vassar Institute for the Liberal Arts, which took place on Nov. 7 and 8. Clemetson was joined by Eric Marcus ’80, Executive Director of the award-winning podcast “Making Gay History,” and Mike Gillis, Head Writer at satirical news
publication The Onion. The program was convened by Vassar Associate Professor of Psychological Science and Media Studies Dara Greenwood and Vice President of Communications Victoria Grantham.
Despite portions of the conversation centering on journalistic ethics and freedom of the press, the work Clemetson, Marcus and Gillis undertake does not necessarily fit within the traditional confines of mainstream, cut-and-dried journalism. Rather, each panelist shares a common goal that propelled them into the business of storytelling: the pursuit of something honest.
“From a young age I was good at writing and bad at everything else. Really, what transformed me from a writer to a comedy writer was picking up a copy of The Onion in middle school and feeling like it was the most honest writing I had come across,” remarked Gillis. This statement might initially seem ironic given that The Onion prints satirical, fictional news. Yet, for The Onion, an average Joe pulling off the highway and deciding whether to get Wendy’s or McDonald’s is top-of-the-fold news.
Traditional journalism often neglects the mundane and universal; however, for Gillis, the mundane and universal is often
See Institute on page 4
er Chuck Schumer never endorsed him. While Schumer did endorse Eric Adams ahead of the 2021 mayoral election, his announcement came only days before the election.
Several Vassar students from New York City expressed overwhelming support for Mamdani in conversations with The Miscellany News. Many students emphasized that their vote for Mamdani was unique because it was not just a party line vote. “I voted for Zohran Mamdani, finally, not because he was the only viable candidate, [but] because I actually was excited about his progressive views for New York City,” said Avery Epstein ’28, a Brooklyn Heights native who canvassed for Mamdani over the summer.
Marley Correll ’28, who lives in the East Village and also canvassed for Mamdani, com-
mented, “I was excited to vote for him, not just as ‘Don’t vote for Cuomo,’ which was an incredibly new experience. I’ve never been that excited to vote for someone.” Atia Guzman Briones ’27, a Jamaica, Queens resident who voted for Mamdani, expressed her appreciation for the mayor-elect’s perspective on politics: “We need more young people in politics, they’re more open-minded and dare to try or even just suggest new things that might just work and pull us out of these very dark times.”
Many students described a positive environment throughout the city in the lead-up to the election. “The community I live in is mostly Muslim and Brown and Arab,” said Ahnaf Ahmed ’28, from Jamaica, Queens. “It’s a no-brainer. And if you go to every
Bedlam performs at Tiny Desk
TheMaria Mitchell Observatory was illuminated with soft morning light and furnished with books, CDs and other knickknacks as performers, audio engineers and eager audience members watched Bedlam take the stage. Every semester, the Student Music Union (StuMu), Vassar College Entertainment (ViCE), Vassar College Television (VCTV) and The Miscellany News produce and record student performances in their Tiny Desk series. On Sunday, Nov. 9, student rock band Bedlam became one of the newest groups to immortalize a performance in this format.
Bedlam, consisting of seniors Denver Brown [Disclaimer: Brown is the Live Events Chair for The Miscellany News], Duncan Beauchamp, Kalina Sloat and Walt Schoen, has been playing together since Fall 2022. Fresh off their first New York City show, Bedlam prepared a set of three songs: “Lemon Tree,” “Seen” and “St. Elizabeth.”
Vassar Tiny Desk first began in 2019 as a series of at-home performances and interviews. It served not only as a performance opportunity but also as a chance to reflect on their music and work. However, Tiny Desk was put on pause in the wake of the COVID-19 pandemic. “The bulk of the
productions before the revitalization were also multi-genre: poets, lots of bands, solo acts and stuff like that,” said ViCE Co-Head Kwabena Adae ’26. “The desire was just to have a space that could be an offering for all those different types of groups to have their voices heard from a Vassar perspective.” In 2023, StuMu, ViCE, VCTV and The Miscellany News revitalized the project, capturing performances by Margot Gordinier ’24, The Night Owls [Disclaimer: The author of this article appears in this video and was a member of the Copy Staff for The Miscellany News at the time of filming] and 30 Minutes Late. Since then, Tiny Desk has become a space for Vassar musicians to take part in a unique recording and performing experience. Based on NPR Music’s “Tiny Desk Concert” program, Vassar’s Tiny Desk is a fully filmed and edited live concert where student musicians present a short set in an intimate setting.
For this concert, Bedlam chose a more minimalist approach to their usual sound. To adjust for the more casual atmosphere of Tiny Desk, the band utilized acoustic guitars, rather than their usual electric guitars, in the first two songs of their set. They also added more harmonies to the vocal lines in “Lemon Tree.” The band mentioned that these songs adjusted well to this format, as “Lemon Tree” already featured
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See Mamdani on page 3
Welcome to our Veterans’
Day issue!
In addition to this reflection by senior Andrew Casperson, see pag- es 6 and 7 for poetry by Vassar Vet- erans Association President Caleb DiBartolo ’26, a reflection by Robert Kissell ’27 and an interiew with Lilly Kinney ’28 by News Editor Julian Balsley.
Veteran reflects on scars, scholarship
Iservedin the United States Marine Corps infantry from 2008 to 2016. During those eight years, I learned more about discipline, sacrifice and brotherhood than I ever thought possible. The Marine Corps did not just shape who I was, it fundamentally redefined what I believed I was capable of enduring. My deployment to Marjah, Afghanistan, in 2011 was one of the most defining chapters of my life. It was there, amid the dust, fear and constant uncertainty, that I came face to face with the cost of war.
The battlefield is a place where you grow up fast. You learn how fragile life is, how quickly everything can change and how much strength it takes to keep moving forward when everything around you feels like it is falling apart. You see the best and worst of humanity, often within the same day. The memories from those months have stayed with me. Not just the loss, but the lessons as well. War does not end when you come home; it follows you, reshaping how you see the world and your place in it.
When I left the Marine Corps, I thought I had left that part of my life behind. What I did not realize was how much it had become a part of me. I carried invisible scars that could not be treated with medicine or rest. Post Traumatic Stress Disorder crept into the quiet moments, and narcolepsy made even ordinary routines unpredictable. There were days when it felt like
the world had moved on without me, and I was left trying to catch up. But I also knew that giving up was not an option. The Marines taught me resilience—to adapt, to overcome and to never stop pushing forward, no matter how steep the climb.
That same mindset eventually led me to Vassar College. The transition from combat to campus was not easy. In the Marines, every day had a purpose: orders, objectives, a clear mission. College was different. Suddenly, I had the freedom to think, question and redefine who I was outside of the uniform. It was disorienting at first. I often felt out of place among students who had not lived through the same experiences. While they talked about theories and ideas, I carried memories that could not fit neatly into the classrooms. But over time, I began to see how those experiences could actually enrich my education rather than isolate me from it.
The structure and discipline of the military helped me adapt to the academic world. I approached each assignment like a mission, striving for excellence. But more importantly, my service gave me a unique perspective on the subjects I studied. In psychology, for instance, I found a field that spoke directly to the questions I had been living with for years: Why do people react to trauma so differently? What allows some to recover and others to break? How do we rebuild meaning after loss?
Those questions became
my motivation. I realized that my path was not just about earning a degree; it was about understanding the very things that had defined so much of my own life. Studying human behavior and mental health gave me the tools to analyze my own experiences rather than simply endure them. It helped me transform my pain into purpose.
At times, my conditions have made my academic journey grueling. There are days when staying focused in class or maintaining energy feels like a battle in itself. But I have learned to treat those challenges not as obstacles, but as part of the process. Every step forward, no matter how small, is a victory. The perseverance that carried me through Afghanistan now carries me through long nights of writing papers and studying for exams.
What I have discovered at Vassar is that strength is not only about endurance. It is also about vulnerability. It takes courage to admit you are struggling, to ask for help and to face the parts of yourself that you once tried to bury. The Marines taught me how to fight, but education has taught me why we fight… for understanding, for growth and for something greater than survival.
When I reflect on my time in both worlds, the military and academia, I no longer see them as separate chapters. They are two sides of the same story. The Marine Corps gave me structure, discipline and a relentless drive to push beyond limits. College has
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given me reflection, empathy and a deeper understanding of what it means to heal. Together, they have taught me that purpose is not something you find once, it is something you continually redefine.
Today, as I approach the end of my senior year, I am proud not just of the degree I am earning, but of the journey it represents. I have learned that strength does not always roar; sometimes, it is simply the act of showing up again and again, even when it is hard. My experiences in war and in the classroom have shown me that growth often comes from the places we least expect it.
I carry the lessons of the Marine Corps with me in everything I do. But I have also learned that true resilience is not about being unbreakable; it is about learning how to rebuild yourself when you are broken. My time at Vassar has helped me do just that. It has allowed me to turn my pain into perspective, my discipline into drive and my past into a foundation for something meaningful.
In many ways, I am still that Marine. My mission is just different now. It is about understanding the mind, helping others heal and finding peace in places I once thought impossible. The battlefield will always be a part of my story, but it no longer defines it. My purpose now lies in education, in empathy, and in using what I have lived through to make a difference for others who are still fighting their own unseen wars.
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Carina Cole
Allison Lowe
Darja Coutts
Luke Jenkins
Soren Fischer
Clara Alger
Julian Balsley
Emma Brown
Hadley Amato
Madeleine Nicks
Grace Finke
Aurelia Harrison
Ben Kaplan
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Students react to NYC mayoral election
mosque or every Friday prayer, you’ll always see someone talking about Zohran. It was pretty hyped up, but I didn’t see people talking about policies and stuff.”
“The vibe was so joyful. It was kind of amazing,” Epstein recalled. “People wanted to engage in these long conversations and say how excited they were. Honestly, the whole energy of the city in the summer was amazing. People at the beach were excited about Zohran and talking to each other.”
Mamdani’s platform was primarily focused on affordability. On housing, he proposes freezing the rent of New York City’s two million rent-stabilized apartments, as well as building 200,000 housing units in the next decade. This proposal would fast-track 100 percent affordable developments. He also plans to create a network of city-owned grocery stores, designed to keep prices low; make all city buses free; raise the corporate tax rate to 11.5 percent, matching New Jersey’s and tax those making over $1 million annually at two percent. He pledges to make childcare free for children six weeks to five years old and provide all new parents with a free “baby basket” of essentials like diapers, baby wipes and post-partum pads. Mamdani also plans to create a Department of Community Safety to address mental health problems and crisis responses such as putting outreach workers in 100 subway stations.
“These days, the police are not trusted in NYC; they’ve gained a reputation for not only failing to do their jobs but also for doing more harm than good,” wrote Guzman Briones. “The idea of a new department meant to deal with mental health crises specifically gives me a sense of safety, knowing that the people who are causing trouble due to possible mental health crises aren’t just going to be getting yelled at or beaten around, but actually getting the help that they need.”
Correll added, “I think that his campaign is really hopeful, very inspiring in a time when we have horrible political things going on. And I also think that his campaign is the most person [and] need-centered campaign
that we’ve had in a really long time.” Charlotte Sand ’26 expressed similar sentiments, writing, “I have always really liked his platform and the way that he plans to prioritize working class New Yorkers as opposed to catering to billionaires and corporate interests. I think that his approach represents a break from establishment [D]emocrats in the politics of NYC and the country.”
Not every student agreed with all of Mamdani’s policies. Epstein criticized Mamdani’s plan to freeze the rent of rent-stabilized apartments, because such apartments are often held in families for generations.
“You end up with a lot of people occupying rent-stabilized apartments who no longer
need it, and a lot of people who could really use a rent-stabilized apartment, who will never get one because they’re a finite supply,” Epstein explained. “So I think that that is not the best way to address the housing crisis in New City.” Epstein added that she supports Mamdani’s plan to build more housing units and fast-track affordable housing.
Some students emphasized that Mamdani may not live up to the high expectations placed on him. “The thing is, even though he’s promising all this stuff, as fast as he went up, we can bring him down that fast too, if he doesn’t deliver on his promises, and if he’s not the person that we thought he was to be,” noted Aqib Shajahan ’28, from East New York, Brooklyn. “I voted for him. But in the end, I still think he’s a politician.”
Correll expressed a similar sentiment. “I would hope that we all stay involved and keep him accountable for whatever he’s doing, which I think we will do,” she said. “And also, I do have a certain hope in his mayorship, but I think I would rather think that he’s gonna do something good and be excited about visions of something better than settle for something that feels more attainable, that’s not actually good.”
Mamdani’s victory concludes a highly contentious mayoral race which featured widespread attacks on the state assemblyman’s character, religion, policies and lack of political experience.
Some noted their concerns with Mamdani’s level of experience. “The two biggest things I value are candidate experience and personal character… Mamdami has no managerial experience and would struggle to lead a team that could smoothly administrate, but has a personal character that is much closer to what a leader should have,” wrote Nat Zucker ’27, a Brooklyn native.
Students expressed their concerns over Cuomo’s 2021 resignation from the Governor’s Office, which followed the publication of a report by the state Attorney General’s office which determined that Cuomo sexually harassed at least 13 female employees. “It’s ultimately very important that people who do have a long history of sexual assault claims against them are not president
or mayor of New York,” wrote Lucy Gaffneyboro ’27, a Brooklyn resident. “[When] Andrew Cuomo was governor, he did his COVID reports and that was nice, but then he stopped being governor and we need to think about why that is.”
Others critiqued Cuomo’s mayoral campaign. “Cuomo has blatantly shown that he does not care for the people of New York City, especially people who rely on food stamps and government subsidies who are the most vulnerable to the rising price of living,” wrote Gloria Strettell ’28, a Manhattan native.
Some felt Mamdani’s win was primarily an expression of New Yorkers’ dislike of Cuomo. “I think it was more not liking Cuomo,” said Ahmed. “People did like Zohran, though, people obviously liked him, but I feel like they were just looking at it based off how much they hated Cuomo and how much better Mamdani is as a speaker and a politician.”
Mamdani’s victory represents one of many Democratic victories in state and local elections across the country. In New Jersey and Virginia, Democratic candidates Mikie Sherrill and Abigail Spanberger won their respective gubernatorial elections. On the West Coast, California constituents voted to pass the state Democratic party’s Proposition 50, which mandates the redrawing of the state’s congressional maps ahead of the 2026 midterm elections. The proposal is a response to the Texas legislature’s approval of a redrawn congressional map.
In Dutchess County, Democratic and Working Families candidates beat Republicans in multiple races. Kara Gerry beat incumbent Ned McLoughlin to become County Court judge, a 10-year position. Dan Aymar-Blair beat Republican Will Truitt in the comptroller race. Furthermore, Democrats flipped the county legislature from red to blue for the first time since 2008. In Poughkeepsie, Democrat Rebecca Edwards, Vassar Professor of History on the Eloise Ellery Chair who is on leave, won re-election as Town Supervisor. Democrats also hold a super-majority on the town board, with five of six seats.
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Continued from Mamdani on page 1
Image courtesy of Kara McCurdy.
Image courtesy of Kara McCurdy.
Storytelling for Change panel spotlights media leaders
Continued from Institute on page 1 true. “What The Onion did for me as a middle-schooler was talk about the everyday experience of American life, which is often stupid or boring,” said Gillis.
For Marcus and Clemetson, this pursuit of honesty took on the form of asking questions with the hopes of receiving authentic answers. When asked by Greenwood about his time at Vassar College and love of storytelling, Marcus recounted: “Here at Vassar, I did my undergraduate thesis about the unbuilding of Main Street Poughkeepsie… I did an interview with the Mayor of Poughkeepsie and I found out that I loved asking questions.” Clemetson shared a similar sentiment: “I grew up in a large family with dinners and a door that wasn’t locked. I came from storytellers but also was in an environment as a child where serious questions weren’t welcomed,” Clemetson recalled. “And as a journalist, your job is to ask people questions all the time and get answers… It felt like the most amazing thing in the world, to be led by curiosity and passion.”
Although Cletmetson explained that the environment she grew up in was not conducive to asking serious questions, it did instill in her the value of community and vulnerability, particularly in the face of difficult choices and cultural moments.
“My job [as the Director of Knight-Wallace Fellowships] is to say, ‘Put all of that down. Let’s sit together. Let’s cook some dinner.’ My job is to try to let them [the fellows] rediscover why they are doing what they do.”
The Knight-Wallace Fellowship program provides accomplished journalists with the funding and opportunity to pursue timely stories while addressing current challenges the journalism industry faces. “This [The Wallace House] is a space dedicated to having journalists recenter themselves and be
in community. It’s a beautiful house, obviously, but I show it to people because it is a subversive place.”
For Marcus’ work on the podcast “Making Gay History,” which has millions of downloads over more than 200 countries around the world, this community is often fostered digitally. “There are huge opportunities in what we do because of the changed [digital] landscape.” In reflecting on the podcast as a medium, Marcus emphasized, “We can reach people in a way we couldn’t before, and in countries where they aren’t supposed to read or view these things. I saw downloads from Libya and Saudi Arabia, and I thought, ‘Yes!’”
Marcus’ emphasis on space and community is not to say that the podcasting medium he uses within his work is unimportant; rather, podcasting allows him to connect with his audience and convey emotion. “Making Gay History” celebrates iconic queer figures and anecdotes. In many cases, these narratives are joyous; often, however, they carry weight. During the panel, Greenwood noted how this audio-based medium is particularly useful in showcasing heavy stories, “The value of the podcast, to hear the voice, to hear the pauses. What a treasure trove to have access to this.”
Although his work is not audio-based, Gillis also notes the benefits—and occasional downfalls—of utilizing unique storytelling mediums. The Onion often uses quippy, nonsensical headlines and stories. In an age of misinformation, these modes can be simultaneously effective and difficult to navigate. “I think part of that is it can be easy to confuse satire with misinformation, but I think the difference between satire and misinformation is very similar to the difference between art and propaganda, and part of that comes from intention,”
Gillis explained in an interview with The Miscellany News. “We’re not trying to willfully deceive people. We’re actually really taking efforts to think about the reasonable reader and how they’ll interpret what we’re putting out.”
The Onion occasionally re-prints headlines. Although this choice might initially appear confusing, it is intentional and non-deceptive. Mass shootings, for example, are a horrific, ongoing reality of living in the United States. In the aftermath of each shooting, The Onion will re-use the following headline and change the dateline: “‘No Way To Prevent This,’ Says Only Nation Where This Regularly Happens.”
Gillis also shared the importance of communication and consideration when transforming the dark realities of our current political and cultural moment into something light and joyful. “There’s a ‘This American Life’ episode where they go into The Onion’s writer’s room; they say, the loudest sound in the writer’s room isn’t laughter. It’s silence.” Gillis continued, “We do laugh about jokes, but a lot of our time in the writer’s room is really spent obsessively going over every single word of the headline, making sure that it is going to be communicating the message we want to be communicating to our readers, and fixating on the precise wording that we’re using, the meaning that we’re going for.”
Humor in the face of tragedy and a disturbing reality can be a deeply healing—or even necessary—experience. “It [making jokes] is one of the most inherently human things to do. After a loved one passes away and you’re standing in the hospital and cracking the first joke… it’s realizing you will not be dragged down by the struggle and mire,” noted Gillis. “There is the ability to breathe that comes from telling a joke.”
In medium, mode and consequence,
the journalistic work of the panelists is non-traditional; this fact, however, does not diminish its value.
Vassar Visiting Assistant Professor of Sociology John Andrews, who attended the panel, emphasized the importance of non-mainstream media in a written comment to The Miscellany News: “Independent and non-traditional news media are invaluable; it can tell the stories that mainstream media cannot or will not since mainstream media is, in the end, oriented toward profitability. In this sense we might say that access to independent and other non-mainstream media is requisite for citizenship today.”
Greenwood additionally stressed the value of storytelling in connecting people, both with each other and their humanity, while also introducing people to new, meaningful knowledge. “Whether sharing important stories from gay history in America with an LGBTQ teen who is listening to a podcast secretly in another country, enabling journalists from war-torn regions to land in a safe space where they can do important work, or eliciting laughter and relief from an Onion headline, each of the speakers aimed to contribute comfort and community, along with information,” she noted in written correspondence with The Miscellany News
Operating outside the confines of mainstream media is no easy task, yet it can be incredibly rewarding. Amid attacks on free speech and dwindling trust in journalistic media, the event emphasized that the pursuit of something honest is, perhaps now more than ever, a noble pursuit indeed. Clemetson acknowledged this complex, fragile state of news media, but emphasized the importance of conveying honest stories whenever possible. “The pursuit is difficult, but it is vital.”
English Department rallies to keep classroom
Following controversy over Vassar College’s plan to turn an English Department classroom into a computer lab, Dean of Planning Marianne Begemann and Professor and Chair of the English Department Wendy Graham have reached an agreement to continue the department’s use of the classroom. Per the agreement, two other classrooms will be combined for the computer lab.
Three weeks ago, Graham was informed via email by Begemann that Sanders Classroom Room 013 (SC013) was going to be repurposed into what she described as a “high-end” computer lab. The decision was made after the College received a substantial financial gift to support the project. Construction was scheduled to begin in May 2026 and be completed before the start of the Fall 2026 semester.
In response, Graham, along with other Vassar students and faculty, protested the proposal by sending emails to the Dean’s Office. On Oct. 27, Vassar English Department Intern Emma Youngblood ’26 sent an email out to all English majors and correlates, asking for students’ help in supporting Graham’s effort to retain control of SC013. Youngblood urged students to email the Dean’s Office and Begemann directly, including personal experiences and anecdotes about the classroom.
In her email, Youngblood wrote, “Though [administrators] have said we will
still have access to the room, the new set up will destroy what made the room useful and accessible.” Youngblood continued, “This classroom is one of the only accessible classrooms we have—it has movable chairs and a large space for performances, conferences, and group/partner work.” In contrast, Youngblood noted, “As I’m sure you know, the other SC classrooms are small, cramped, and uncomfortable.”
In an interview with The Miscellany News, Youngblood spoke directly about the unique services SC013 has provided her and other students within the English department: “[SC013] has movable seating, which the other classrooms do not… I’ve had performance classes [there]. I had a Shakespeare class and we had to do acting out and stuff like that… I’ve used it for group projects, and I’ve used it for creative writing workshops.” Youngblood explained that SC013’s size also allows for the department to accommodate larger classes, noting, “I’ve had a class where students are literally sitting on the floor for the entire semester.”
Youngblood explained that, to her, the greatest danger of losing SC013 has to do with classroom dynamics: “English is all about connecting with your other students and hearing what others have to say. And that’s really hard to do if you’re uncomfortable in a room that doesn’t fit people.” She identified fixed seating as her primary concern, saying, “Being in rows [means] you can’t see each other, [which makes] it harder to have a free-form discussion.” She also shared, “A lot of professors don’t even allow
you to have computers in the classroom, so if you have a screen just staring at you…It’s super distracting. You can’t engage in the class in the same way.”
Emma Pearson ’27, an English major, echoed similar concerns and spoke about the valuable learning experiences she has had in SC013: “My first class that I ever took in the English Department, my first year writing seminar, was in that classroom. So it has sentimental value, because that’s the classroom where I decided I wanted to be an English major.”
Pearson added, “Also, the class I took in that classroom was with [Adjunct Assistant Professor of English] Christian Lewis, who specializes in Disability Studies, and that really opened my eyes to how English and Disability Studies can overlap…. It’s also one of the only accessible classrooms. And then it being taken away felt sadly ironic.”
Similarly, Vice President of the English Majors Committee Miranda Chen ’27 advocated for the value SC013 provides disabled faculty and students: “[If SC013 is repurposed,] we will lose one of our most accessible classrooms in Sanders. This will affect students and professors with mobility issues, as they may no longer be able to use the classroom.”
After several weeks of writing emails and collaborating with faculty and students, Graham was able to sit down with Begemann and Dean of the Faculty Demetrius Eudell. In an email to The Miscellany News on Nov. 10, Graham wrote, “Today, I received assurances that the reconfigura-
tion of 013 Sanders as a Computer Science lab is off the table.” Instead, the Dean’s Office now plans to combine two classrooms on the basement floor to construct the computer lab.
To Graham, this outcome was ideal. She wrote to The Miscellany News, “[SC013 is] the only room that permits a forum for ideas.” Additionally, she noted that the College’s decision to keep SC013 a classroom aligns with its and the English Department’s larger goals to improve accessibility campuswide: “The college has expressed pride in the English Department’s contributions to Disability Studies, both through the curricular innovation of Professor Emerita Leslie Dunn and through hiring. We feel that it is crucial to keep Sanders 013 for the use of the English department and others as a reasonable accommodation for the benefit and convenience of all with mobility issues.”
Though proponents of the mission to save SC013 are satisfied with the outcome of the College’s decision, some feel that not enough has been done to protect the English Department’s academic needs. When asked about the plan to repurpose SC013, Youngblood explained that her frustration with the College was nothing new: “The English Department is already spread out across campus because our classrooms keep being taken from us… It’s the same issue. We only have about three or four actual classrooms within Sanders that we use. And the basement classroom, 013, is one of them.”
Jackson Hrebin Guest Reporter
Bedlam strips back their sound for Tiny Desk
quite a few open strings, and “Seen” was one of their slower songs. Brown, a guitarist and vocalist for Bedlam, said, “I feel like some of the songs we do have really vulnerable lyrics that are drowned out by really distorted guitars. Stripping it back and having the vocals come through a lot makes it more intimate.”
Beauchamp added, “[My favorite moment] was being able to hear the raw lyrics in this stripped-back form, and knowing that the audience could hear them pretty well too and hopefully appreciate them a bit more as a result of that.”
The audience and Tiny Desk team were captivated by “Lemon Tree” with Sloat, Bedlam’s bassist, noting the attentive silence as a standout moment of the performance.
Bedlam continued with “Seen,” a fan-favorite ballad sung by Schoen, featuring a more laid-back drum line played by Beauchamp. Sloat mentioned that, besides the change in instrumentation, their live rendition was quite similar to the recorded version.
Bedlam fully leaned into their signature sound for the final song of their set, “St. Elizabeth,” with Brown and Schoen making the switch back to electric guitars. Schoen said, “We wanted to keep our identity as we are an emo-ish alternative rock band, so with the last song we had to get a little bit of the distorted electric guitar in there.” The previously silent audience members were now dancing in their seats and bobbing their heads with a new sense of energy.
Members of StuMu, ViCE and VCTV made it clear that Tiny Desk has been a labor of love for all involved. “I think this experience has been really interesting because every person that’s involved is really passionate about it and wants to make it the best it can be,” said Katherine Bernstein ’27, ViCE’s Tiny Desk Coordinator. Linus Barnes ’27, StuMu’s Tiny Desk Liaison, additionally mentioned that this project has been evolving into an independent effort with the involved student organizations adding designated roles for Tiny Desk. “It can be a lot—it can be very overstimulating, the number of people in such a small space,” said Barnes. “But working with everybody, it’s really cool getting such a diverse set of opinions and interests musically.”
Members of Bedlam mentioned that with their set, they were hoping to reach a wider audience and showcase the variety in their discography. “On our record, I feel like there’s something for everybody,” Brown said.
It was obvious that everyone, both onstage and behind the scenes, was passionate about creating a product that would speak to the broader Vassar community.
“I hope they just learn a little more about us,” Sloat said. “I think so far our legacy on the campus of the things we’ve been playing is obviously heavier; we do rock shows, we try to do things with a big audience so people have space to dance and really be part of that, but I hope everyone learns a little bit more about what we want to say and our music. And if they like what they
heard, they can hear a heavier version of all of it.”
Schoen added, “Just for us as a band, being diverse in our abilities and being able to adapt to these new situations and still maintain our identity was a big thing. Also to showcase to people that we want to meet them where they’re at… there’s always a way to connect with people.”
The release date for Bedlam’s Tiny Desk premiere is to be announced. In the meantime, you can listen to their debut album, “This Too Shall Pass,” on various streaming platforms and keep up with their social media for updates on future concerts.
‘LUX’: Scaling Rosalía’s sonic Tower of Babel
Eduardo Culmer Columnist
Hundreds of bodies crowd into the dimly lit space, smoke and mist dancing through the artificial light that emanates from the stage. Their eyes are watching her at the center of it all like some sonic saint—her martyrdom is musical, and she reigns over the crowd from a reliquary box of white and pale blue fabric. With her face turned away from the listening party audience, she is like a self-contained image of the sublime.
With her latest album “Lux,” released on Friday, Nov. 7, Rosalía subverts the story in Genesis and invents a contemporary Tower of Babel. Rock drums, intricate orchestral and choral arrangements and acoustic guitar replace crude mud bricks. Rosalía’s voice—oscillating between operatic and contemporary—elevates the crowd of onlookers beyond the “7th Heaven,” or the eighth or even the 1000th. This Tower of Babel ambitiously reaches for a paradise where language barriers are broken and music is the lingua franca of lost love and loneliness.
Following up her 2022 alternative reggaeton album “Motomami,” Rosalía’s “Lux” deals in a continuation of the same topics: heartbreak, mortality and the divine feminine. At the recent New York City listening party christening the album, the phrases “When was the last time you were in complete darkness?” and “Sometimes being in complete darkness is the best way
to find the light” were projected on a dark screen behind the singer’s stage, which was draped in rumpled fabrics to evoke the image of a massive bed.
As its title suggests, “Lux”—meaning “light” in Latin—intends to guide its listeners through this proverbial darkness and toward the light. In Rosalía’s own words: “Artists aren’t giving you what you want, they’re giving you what you need.” They are giving you the world. But how does one artist shed light on the world, especially with the limitations of language scattering and obscuring her message like the disenfranchised citizens of the fallen city of Babel?
Evidently, when one language is not enough to express the wide breadth of emotions a human being is capable of feeling, you use 14 instead.
“Lux,” unlike “Motomami,” not only features lyrics in Rosalía’s native languages of Catalan and Spanish but also includes lines in Arabic, English, French, German, Hebrew, Italian, Japanese, Latin, Mandarin, Portuguese, Sicilian and Ukrainian. This blending of languages is not just some impressive gimmick, however: It is an artful exploration of the quasi-divine pain every human is capable of experiencing. Fittingly, each language reflects a similarly ubiquitous concept: female martyrdom.
“No, no, no soy una santa, pero estoy blessed,” sings Rosalía in Spanish on track two, “Reliquia.” She claims that, although she herself is not a saint, she is still blessed and imbued with mystic feminine power.
She, like the listeners of “Lux,” shares the same emotions as any canonized martyr suffering for their love. Rosalía abandons her vanity and offers herself up as a relic—“Soy tu reliquia”—to the “playboys” and “emotional terrorists” who have hurt her, speaking in the same language as the Peruvian saint whose self-sacrifice she emulates. Like Saint Rosalía of Lima, who self-flagellated and isolated herself for her Christian devotion, Rosalía and countless heartbroken people around the world tear themselves down for the sake of pleasing another.
Echoing a similar sentiment in Spanish, Latin, English and Japanese on track four, “Porcelana,” she says, “Ego sum nihil, ego sum lux mundi,” or, in English, “I am nothing, I am the light of the world.” In Japanese, she sings, “I’ll throw away my beauty before you have the chance to ruin it,” echoing the story of the Buddhist nun Ryōnen Gensō, who disfigured her face in search of spiritual truth. Rosalía flips the script, using Gensō as an allegory for preemptively making oneself feel unworthy or ugly before heartbreak has the chance to do the same. In “Porcelana,” Gensō’s ecstasy and suffering clash to create a poignant and paradoxical image of self-actualization.
This painful devotion takes on cosmic proportions in track 11, “La Yugular,” when, in Arabic, she asserts that she would “destroy the sky” and “tear down hell” for love—the same kind of celestial passion first defined in Sufi mystic and poet Rabia Basri’s “Ishq” or “Doctrine of Divine Love.”
Each track then becomes a hagiography—a biography of a saint or mystic’s life—reflecting the multicultural nature of martyrdom and breaking the language barrier of pain. Like Joan of Arc, Olga of Kyiv or Teresa of Avila, Rosalía is willing to risk it all for the sake of love. Whether this affection is for the divine or for an “ain’t-shit” dude is null and void. The distinction between the two is blurred to create a universal message of unrequited or toxic love—the kind that leaves you broken in the dark. As both “nothing” and the “light of the world,” Rosalía tells the many stories of sainted women from around the globe in their native tongues to prove that her own heartbreak and darkness can be a unifying fire that transcends language. As “Lux” fades into silence, what lingers in that space is not confusion but communion. The Tower of Babel, in this case, stands not as a testament to human arrogance but to our intrinsic need to be understood and loved.
Where the old Babel scattered humanity into disenfranchised chaos, Rosalía gathers the languages of a broken people and layers Catalan atop Japanese, Latin over Arabic, until language dissolves into just feeling. Because that is all that language is, is it not? Feeling. She not only rebuilds Babel to reach God, but so that we might reach each other.
Through “Lux,” heartbreak becomes architecture, and Rosalía’s voice lights the way to heaven as the lingua franca of the brokenhearted.
Image courtesy of Zander Ostrovsky ’28.
Continued from Bedlam on page 1
Themeless exhibit brings color and emotion to the Deece
Tait Tavolacci Guest Columnist
One of my favorite times of the fall semester is here again: Vassar Artist Group’s (VAG) themeless student art exhibit in Gordon Commons (the Deece). As always, I am endlessly impressed. Our student body is very talented, and the exhibits are always arranged so thoughtfully, with this year being no exception.
The sheer range of materials represented is astounding. This exhibit features everything from digital art to watercolor, oil pastel to collage and even embroidery floss and fabric with acrylic paint, as seen in Tasi’s “Bombshell.” It pops out from the wall in an exciting bloom of textures and colors, and the expressive embroidered face surrounded by swaths of fabric, full of life. My only complaint is that it is too far up the wall for me to reach out and touch it.
That desire to get up close and see the details was completely satisfied with “Robyn” by Jaron Milman ’28, a large portrait in watercolor, collage and colored pencil. I could have studied the piece for hours. The subject, dressed in richly patterned clothes, stands beside a yellow bicycle, their expression calm and confident. The shading work is incredible, with layers of color adding depth to each curve of the face and straight edge of the bicycle’s frame. The precision and care poured into every inch of this piece is obvious and truly commendable. It is truly inspiring to be able to look at a work of art and practically see every hour that went into it.
Beyond technical skill, this show is brimming with emotion. One of the most striking examples is “Forgetfullness,” a large digital print by M. Berk Meral ’28. The piece depicts a faceless, shapeless figure whose head is pierced by jagged streaks of gray, white and black, the backdrop fiery and ominous. In terms of shapes and textures, this piece is simple but so evocative, calling to mind an assault
upon one’s personhood. We do not know what is being forgotten, but it is clear that it is a violent process, a sharp invasion into the subject’s body, blackened and charred as though ravaged by fire. The visceral intensity is impressive and more than a little haunting. Another piece that stopped me in my tracks was “Frankenstein’s Monster,” a digital painting by Ezrikel. The creature sits hunched in the foreground, wrapped in a blanket, face turned toward the light. His scars are rendered with care, enhancing rather than marring his beauty. The lighting feels real and emotional, golden rays pouring into the shadowy space and illuminating his features. The soft brushwork lends tenderness to a figure so often depicted as grotesque. His expression carried so much emotion, sorrow, desperation, longing and rawness that lingered with me long after I moved on.
“Cloudy Nights,” another digital piece by Kelsey Wang ’28, depicts two women, glamorously bathed in deep tones of blue and purple, their features glowing in faint moonlight. One clasps the other’s hand, holding it up to her lips, and their shared gaze is pensive, an almost cinematic moment of tension and longing. Every brushstroke captures the feeling of something soft and intimate. It is a quiet invitation to step one foot into their world but not fully enter.
On a more whimsical note is “Splash-ed” by Mia Walker ’28, a charming black-and-white composition of paper, ink, watercolor and acrylic markers. It depicts a mountainside town built from bridge to rooftops, disappearing into the clouds above. Tucked into the side of the mountain is a girl’s face, peeking out of the landscape like a child poking her head out from beneath a thick blanket. Her long, dark
hair blends into the lines of buildings, and from the top of her head, three black birds take flight. Her large eyes are filled with such exquisite calm that one cannot help but feel it with her. It seems as though she is the one dreaming this world into being, and we get to share the dream with her, stepping into the land her mind creates when she is at rest. These are just a few of the pieces I loved, and overall, this year’s student art exhibit once again demonstrates what makes this tradition so special: the freedom of themelessness and the imagination of our artists.
The show bursts with color, texture and feeling, transforming the Deece’s plain walls and making the space come alive with creativity.
As the semester deepens and the days grow darker, it is a joy to take a moment between classes to stop and admire the inspiring work of fellow students.
Veterans’ Voices Poetry Spotlight
a poem by caleb dibartolo
What can I say about Vassar, That can’t be said about the others?
That I built a family on this campus? New sisters and new brothers?
No, that’s too easy, It doesn’t make me think. It doesn’t give, “Raise your glass.” It gives, “Yeah, I guess I’ll drink.”
I had so very little purpose, Y’know, fresh out the gate. I thought of this as a real start, Honestly? A professionally cleaned slate.
I mean, I still wake up early, And know exactly what to do.
I know just when to go to boxing, And I memorized rugby practice times too. I know where all the bathrooms are, I talk to the AFC crew.
And if you need a nice place to study, I might just know a few.
Don’t get me wrong…
My GPA could be higher,
But my involvement is where I excel. Russian, Athletics, Philosophy. I was wrong to think school would be hell.
It’s senior year now, though; and I was definitely proven wrong. I didn’t think that I could contribute
To the Vassar College Student Song.
The song that wipes away the tears,
The song that builds you up.
The song that’s sung throughout the years,
The song that fills the cup.
The song that introduces you,
To your best and worst friends.
The song that boils your blood sometimes.
The song that asks for amends.
The song that you know instinctively.
The song that transcends the strife.
The song of the Vassar College Student.
The song that you’ll carry for life.
I’m proud to become an Alumni, For the school that helped me face my fears.
I can’t wait to walk down the line, Heart full of joy and a face full of new tears.
It’s been real and it’s been fun,
And it’s been real fun.
Thank you, Vassar College, for everything you have given me—and for everyone you have introduced me to. For better or for worse.
The U.S. Army taught me a lot. I practically grew up in it. From 2014 to 2022, all I knew was the routine in front of me and the countless bad ideas I came up with when I had nothing better to do. Along the way, I made friends—family, really—who will be a part of my life forever. It had its ups and downs, but I do not regret the years it took to shape me into the stubborn, strongwilled and sometimes falsely confident person I am today.
Madeleine Nicks/The Miscellany News.
Military student reflects on Vassar experience
Julian Balsley News editor
Lilly Kinney ’28 is a Petty Officer Second Class in the Navy, where she works as an analyst. She is a sophomore majoring in International Studies with concentrations in Political Science and Sociology. Our conversation has been edited for length and clarity. Why did you enter the military?
I did not enjoy high school at all. I was not gifted academically. I had no idea what I wanted to do. No military family. No nothing. And when I was in high school, there was an NJROTC [Navy Junior Reserve Officers Training Corps] program that I, on a whim, decided to do. Our instructor was a retired Master Chief in the Navy. He was amazing. When I got closer to graduation, I felt like it might be a really good out for me. I came from a super small town. There was nothing around. I was like: This might give me a really good stepping stone to do something elsewhere, get a little bit more experience, be exposed to people. It was a mixture of wanting to get out of my small town and wanting to have the option to pursue my education, because I wasn’t going to be able to do that straight out of high school.
What is your military work like?
My role in the military has been as an analyst, and I’ve done a lot of cultural studies in different regions of the world. In the Navy, depending on the job, Reserves can feel very similar to what it feels like on active duty. When I travel back to base to go to work every month, those couple of days that I’m there, I
Without
am active duty. You definitely get the civilian role in the Reserves, because everybody has a full time life outside of the military. You get a lot of different life experiences, a lot of people with really massive responsibilities outside of the military. But when we’re all at work, it’s a team. We’re all there for the exact same reason.
What is it like to be in the Reserves while also leading a full civilian life?
When you are in the Reserves, there is always the possibility that you get that call [to deploy]. It’s something that we all live with every single day, that that call may come. And when it comes, you answer and you go. We have seen it happen. I’ve had many friends that have been called up over the last few years on a whim, and have had to forward deploy. My commander just got called to forward deploy. It does happen. It’s not all the time. I’ve been in for quite some time now, and I’ve never been involuntarily mobilized.
Is it strange to go so frequently between a college and military environment?
Absolutely. I’ve always called it a dual identity because you very much have to adapt to both roles. The roles that a military student is playing at college versus what they’re doing at work are so different, but they go hand in hand. Everything I do in the military, everything I’ve learned in the military, has helped me be a better student, and everything that I’m learning at Vassar, I’m able to take into work with me.
Have you gotten any flak from either
place for being a part of the other?
No, the military has been so supportive of my education here. Many of the people that I work with went to very similar schools to Vassar. Pretty much since day one, Vassar as an institution has been so beyond supportive. They have made me feel very welcomed with what I do in the military. They’ve accepted me with open arms as I am. Sometimes I think it’s hard for other students to understand what it’s like to be in the military and a full time student, but I don’t feel like I’ve gotten flak in that way. Maybe it’s also because I am younger, and I fit in pretty well that a lot of people don’t even realize I’m a military student. But when people do realize, I usually get a positive reaction. We have a politically active campus, so I think sometimes when the organization is under fire, military students can be associated with that automatically, which can be tricky. But I never feel an individual negative reaction to me being a military student. Because I hold a lot of similar values to other students here, I’ve always felt very accepted for who I am. I’ve always felt like the College does a really good job at balancing general consensus about certain global topics and still making sure that we feel like we belong here at the end of the day. Does it feel weird that you are around people who are your age, doing the same thing, and yet you are at a very different place in that you have been in the military?
I definitely don’t feel weird about it. I love it. I think it’s been really good for me to be in a traditional college environment. It’s actually
really refreshing to be around other students who don’t have military experience, because a lot of people have followed a traditional route, and that’s something that I never did. But there’s also a population here that does understand and does get my position, so I get the best of both worlds. But most of the time, my military career doesn’t even come up because I am just a Vassar student getting my education, and I do all the exact same things that every other Vassar student does. I have another portion of my life outside of Vassar, but my biggest priority always is being a student and trying to be a part of the community, and I have definitely been able to. What is it like being a woman in such a male-dominated field?
The military has made exceptional progress with women being in the exact same position as men. We have woman leadership that are pinnacles of leadership. They emulate everything that everybody wants to be. It can be tricky sometimes being a younger woman, because I feel like people automatically assume that I’m less educated or less experienced—and I very well may be—but I think being a woman can play into that a little bit. The progress that’s been made on gender roles in the military has really caught up to speed. I’ve been given the exact same opportunities as every single man that I’ve been with since day one of training until now, and I continue to rank up the same—or even more so—as men in my unit. It feels very natural to be in a male-dominated field, maybe just because they don’t make me feel like I’m any different than them.
illusions (or not that kind of patriot)
Everyone has their reasons. Some of us wanted stability or a way out of a difficult situation, and others sought belonging or purpose that civilian life had failed to offer. Some of us thought we were making a real difference and doing something that would help people. Many of us who served did not enlist out of blind allegiance or political ideology. Whatever brought us there, most of us entered the military hoping to do some good in a complicated world.
What they do not tell you is that the military preys on those from difficult backgrounds. The poor, the under-educated and the damaged. They post recruiters at high schools and show the idealistic life of a “hero” in TV commercials and movies, but everything they tell you comes with an imperceptible asterisk. They make promises they never intended on keeping, and the stability and camaraderie is a selective “good ol’ boys” club.
“Don’t make waves and you’ll eat.” This statement was one of the first things I heard upon landing at my first, and final, assignment. It took less than six months to shatter the nationalist, patriotic idealism they try to instill through the floundering American education system and then again at Basic Training. Over time, the “hero worship” that surrounds the American Military, among other professions, presented itself as the problem that it is. When every enlisted member and veteran is treated as a flawless hero, it silences the harder conversations we need to have about the human behind the uniform. That kind of blind reverence is dangerous because not everyone who serves is a good person. A belief that any one person is above accountability and criticism turns intelligent people into fools. Real respect means being willing to question the people and the systems that perpetuate damaging cycles, both within the
military and beyond.
As a veteran, it is hard to watch the rise of authoritarian and fascist movements here at home.
Many veterans still remember the oath we swore as more than just words to recite at our enlistment, or when we finished Basic Training. The oath is not to a political party, a leader or the flag; it is to the Constitution and to the country and her people. For those of us who have seen what unchecked power and dehumanization can lead to, the warning signs have been impossible to ignore.
You may not like veterans, and you may not want us around in your spaces or our influence in your lives, but it would be wise to not forsake the veterans who remember our oath. Do not assume that because our service once benefited the military industrial complex that we are incapable of standing against it. Many of us are trying to reckon with the contradictions of our service. Speaking out against the same hyper-militarism and political manipulation that once shaped our lives is how some of us continue our service. Not every enlisted member and veteran will be an ally to a righteous cause, nor will every one of us care to remember the oath we swore. But I can guarantee at least one as an ally in the fight for accountability, justice and peace.
Many veterans carry a deep awareness of the contradictions in which we were part of, and some of us live with that every day. We do not want praise or pity. We want honesty, humility and a country that lives up to the ideals we once swore to protect. “Hero worship” will not save democracy, but solidarity might. The most “Patriotic American” thing we can do is stand up against the same forces of hate and control that countless Americans once fought to defeat abroad.
As they say, “chinga la migra,” and every empire that calls genocide “security.” Different lands, same blood, same silence.
Welcome to Veterans’ Voices!
Each year, during the week of Veterans’ Day, The Miscellany News features pieces written by Vassar Veterans. This tradition was started six years ago by veteran and former Humor Editor Francisco Andrade ’22.
Veteran students have long found a place on Vassar’s campus, ever since 1946, when Vassar acquired a special charter to admit World War II veterans eligible for the then-new GI Bill. In 2012, Vassar became the first college partner with the Posse Veterans Foundation; since then, anywhere from six to 10 veterans matriculate with each incoming class.
We would like to extend thanks to President of the Vassar Veterans Association Caleb DiBartolo ’26 for his help coordinating this year’s Veterans’ Voices issue.
Robert Kissel
FEATURES
Covering ‘Beyond Survival’: Justice and community at Vassar
Cici Zhang Guest Columnist
On the evening of Monday Nov. 3, the Villard Room glowed with soft lamplight as students, faculty and community members gathered for a screening of “Beyond Survival,” a documentary about the long fight to pass New York’s Domestic Violence Survivors Justice Act. Hosted by the Support, Advocacy and Violence Prevention (SAVP) Office and the college’s Counseling Service, the screening promised more than a film. It became a space for reflection on justice, resilience and collective care.
Before the lights dimmed, SAVP Director Rachel Gallert welcomed the audience and gently pointed out the resources available: the Faculty Parlor for private support, gender-neutral restrooms and advocates nearby for anyone who needed them. Her introduction felt less procedural than protective, set-
ting the tone for an evening rooted in empathy and safety.
The film opened with white text on a black screen: “This is the story of the Domestic Violence Survivors Justice Act. The community that fought for it. The people working to implement it. And the survivors who continue to lead the way.” From that first line, the room fell completely silent. Through interviews with legislators, judges and survivors, “Beyond Survival” followed a decade of tireless organizing that turned pain into policy. It showed how the justice system often mirrors the very patterns of control that survivors escape.
At one point, a survivor, tears streaking her face, looked into the camera and said, “We survived, and we deserve it.” Around the room, many wiped their eyes. The atmosphere was heavy but warm, a shared ache that seemed to pull everyone closer.
The story struck deep for Vassar. Nicole
“Nikki” Addimando, a former Vassar employee, was among the first people in New York to receive a sentence reduction under the act. Many on campus had joined efforts for her release, and the film felt like both a remembrance and a reminder of unfinished work.
After the credits, the panel began. Michelle Burman, Addimando’s sister, spoke softly about the pain of watching the court system replay cycles of abuse. Kate Mogulescu, Legal & Policy Director of the Survivors Justice Project, explained how survivors still struggle to access the law meant to protect them. “Passing a law isn’t the end,” she stated. “Justice happens in every courtroom, every hearing, every story retold.”
Then, Judy Clark, a longtime activist who spent decades incarcerated, connected the dots between domestic violence and prison itself. “If we understand abuse as control,” she said, “we must see incarceration as part of the same pattern.” The room stilled again.
During the Q&A, students asked about the cost of advocacy and how to stay involved. The panelists returned to one idea: Change takes community. The act passed because survivors and allies refused to give up, working together year after year until lawmakers finally listened.
As the evening ended, Gallert reminded attendees of campus and local resources, from SAVP advocates to the Family Services Victim Center hotline. Conversations lingered by the refreshment tables, low and thoughtful. No one seemed eager to leave.
“Beyond Survival” may have been filmed in courtrooms and prisons across New York, but its message belongs here, too. It showed how people—survivors, organizers, students—can build something powerful together. As the crowd stepped into the cold November night, one truth felt clear: Justice is not a verdict. It is a community, sustained by those who keep showing up.
Film screening celebrates Jane Austen’s 250th Birthday
Jane Austen was born almost two and a half centuries ago, and yet she lives on in 2025—that is, through her stories. Heartwarming, witty windows into English women’s lives in the 19th century, Austen’s novels are timeless in their representations of empathy, female strength and, of course, romance. The most famous of Austen’s works, “Pride and Prejudice,” is the focus of the special event, “Austen 250: Four Fridays with Jane,” hosted in collaboration by the English, Film and Global Nineteenth Century Studies Departments to celebrate Austen’s 250th year.
Every other Friday for the remainder of the fall semester, four film adaptations of Austen’s “Pride and Prejudice” will be shown in the aptly antique theater of Blodgett Auditorium, including the irreverent modern rom-com, “Bridget Jones’ Diary” (2001) on Nov. 21 and the Bollywood take, “Bride and Prejudice” (2004) on Dec. 5. The series of screenings will culminate in a final celebration on Dec. 12 with Joe Wright’s “Pride & Prejudice” (2005) and an
obligatory birthday cake, just before Austen’s official semiquincentennial birthday on Dec. 16. Each screening will be prefaced by a 10-minute talk presented by a professor from the sponsoring academic departments. They will provide historical context and information relevant to Austen and each film, as well as their own research.
The event kicked off last Friday, Nov. 7, with a screening of Robert Z. Leonard’s 1940 film “Pride and Prejudice,” starring Greer Garson as Elizabeth Bennet alongside Laurence Olivier as Mr. Darcy, with an introduction from Professor of Music on the Mary Conover Mellon Chair Kathryn Libin. Libin helped to spearhead the organization of this eight-week-long event alongside Professor of English on the Mary Augusta Scott Chair, Susan Zlotnick.
The warm chandeliers of Blodgett and a table of popcorn and black and whitethemed treats—to match the black-andwhite film—welcomed a mixture of students, Vassar staff, professors, community members and their loved ones as they emerged through the double doors like Matthew Macfadyen from the misty evening.
Though that particular reference would
have to wait for December, because last Friday’s Mr. Darcy (Olivier) would be seen riding through the sound stages of MGM Studios rather than the rolling hills of the English countryside. As explained by Libin, this “Pride and Prejudice,” the first surviving film adaptation of Austen’s bestknown novel, faced obstacles even before filming began. Its production and plans to film on-site in England were interrupted after a certain world war broke out, principle actors like Clark Gable and Norma Shearer were lost to other notable films of the time, and, after the release of Victor Fleming’s “The Wizard of Oz” (1939), MGM Studios no longer had the budget to make it a Technicolor film.
On trend with contemporary products of Hollywood’s “Golden Age,” Libin also explained in her introduction that this “Pride and Prejudice” did not intend to be Regency period-accurate—not in its unabashedly Victorian costume design and certainly not in its score, done by lesser-known “The Wizard of Oz” (1939) composer Herbert Stothart.
“I’m always very intrigued by how the film adaptations use music to support the narrative in various ways, or highlight aspects of particular characters,” described Libin in written correspondence. She continued, “You can hear him [Stothart] borrowing little fragments of music that the audience already knows and weaving them in to create certain associations; for example, the bit of Elgar’s processional ‘Pomp and Circumstance,’ which we’re used to hearing at commencement ceremonies, accompanies the haughty aristocrats when they enter the assembly room.”
So, despite a rough start to production, with the help of an elegant, sweeping score from Stothart, Oscar-winning art direction and a talented cast of actors—even if they were not the producers’ top picks—the charming film managed to stand strong. Even today, it continues to hold its own alongside its many modern successors.
“I was very excited to see the 1940 version again, and it did not disappoint.” Libin continued, “I had forgotten how very faithful it was to the original novel, even with a few added scenes and a general look that evoked the 1830s rather than 1813.”
As for Libin’s interest in bringing what has become a worldwide celebration for Austen’s big day to Vassar, she explained, “First, there are several of us who love Jane Austen, and teach Jane Austen. I have a
course called ‘Jane Austen and Music in the Domestic Sphere’ that is cross-listed between MUSI and GNCS. I’ve also been very involved with the Jane Austen Society of North America for many years, so have been well aware of big plans to celebrate Austen’s 250th birthday literally around the world.”
As for how the event was brought into being, she explained, “Susan Zlotnick and I started talking about this at the end of the summer, and decided that we really wanted some kind of recognition or celebration of this at Vassar, so we lined up some other colleagues to help introduce films with ‘Ten-Minute Talks,’ and talked with our chairs about financial support, and our colleagues in Media Resources about tech support, and there we are.”
The event’s cozy atmosphere, the film’s quality and the foreword from Libin on her area of expertise certainly did not disappoint. As a die-hard fan of the 2005 adaptation and score (highly recommend for studying ambience) and as someone who was not aware that a 1940 adaptation existed before I saw news of this event, Libin’s insight was invaluable not only to appreciating this film’s place in cinema and music history but how its beautiful settings and satisfying performances, with plenty of the all-important chemistry between Olivier and Garson, continue to live and breathe through the centuries. I, for one, am looking forward to seeing how this is further explored, as Austen’s source material is passed between generations in adaptation after adaptation at the event’s next three screenings.
“This is the beginning of a wartime, a time of real struggle, a time of intense anxiety and, increasingly, a time of austerity [...],” explained Libin in her final remarks about the 1940 film. “They [MGM] had those two huge blockbusters that came out in 1939, both used enormous resources. This is a much more modest production, and I think this was seen as an opportunity to pull back, to still give people entertainment but make it light, gentle, comedy-romance in black-and-white—a domestic drama, not an epic drama. It’s lower budget, lower stress, and as so often, it’s Jane Austen as a kind of panacea, a comfort in troubled times. I think we can all appreciate that.”
I only have one request: Can we include “Pride and Prejudice and Zombies” (2016) for Austen’s 251st?
Sydney Jones Assistant Features Editor
Sydney Jones/The Miscellany News.
FEATURES
Dr. Burnett lectures on human fracking and attention
Isabel Holmes Guest Columnist
Terms like “human fracking” and “attention activism” filled the room at the Vassar Institute for the Liberal Arts on Friday, Nov. 7, during Dr. Graham Burnett’s keynote speech on the subject of AI. Entitled “Will Higher Ed Survive AI?,” Burnett’s speech covered a range of subjects on the use of AI at higher education institutions like Vassar College and Princeton University, where he teaches. For the audience’s understanding, Burnett used two sections of his keynote speech to define these terms and, in doing so, introduced a distinctly unique and insightful approach to the emergence of AI and its relationship to our attention spans.
Burnett is the Henry Charles Lea Professor of History at Princeton University, where he leads a class on the history of human attention. He began his talk by establishing himself as an activist and advocate for the reclamation of human attention. Burnett explained that he works with a group called “Friends of Attention,” who are dedicated to a movement to protect our intentional practices. These “intentional practices” are the human things we do that require our care and attention. Practices like reading, or interacting with others. He explained that he is a part of this movement and this group. “It is a movement of people who care about you, protecting and nourishing human attention.” This movement is imperative, he explained, to educational spaces. To keep these spaces full of our hu-
man thought and contribution, we have to work to protect them. He explains: “Education and storytelling need to be rethought as practices of attention.”
According to Burnett, our attention is threatened by a process called “human fracking.” He explained that human fracking is the process by which our attention is commodified for money through social media and technology. We lose hours on end to social media as a result of an algorithmic manipulation of our interests and personalities. Human fracking exploits our minds and takes away from our time dedicated to our actual interests.
Following his explanation of this “human fracking,” Burnett asked the audience, “Do you ever feel concerned about your attention span?” There was a unanimous response of raised hands and nodding heads. Seemingly, everyone feels that their phone, or their technology more generally, is impacting their ability to pay attention. Burnett argues that this theft of attention is an exploitation of our minds for money: “Right now, new technologies have made possible new forms of exploitation, new ways to make money. A new generation of tech capitalists have figured out that it is possible to extract money value directly from human consciousness.”
This is the use of our attention for money and what Dr. Burnett defined as human fracking. “Human fracking is to the internal environment of our consciousness, what petroleum fracking is to the terrestrial environment,” he described. After defining
this term, he emphasized the importance of calling this process out. Rather than leaving the audience with this dark and sobering concept, he explained that there are easy ways in which we can protect our minds from this exploitation. We have to identify the processes of human fracking in order to be able to protect our attention and our educational spaces.
He urged the audience to begin to designate collective spaces of shared interests and protect them from erasure, which is “attention activism” in his own terms. Burnett made the distinction that he does not believe technology, or even the use of AI, is destroying our actual intellect: “Intellectual life is not coming to an end, our relationship to text is not coming to an end.” Rather, he believes that we have to think about a new way to dedicate our attention to study and learning. Finding new ways to interact with study, literature and the humanities—the subjects many academics fear are coming to an end with AI—is imperative to keeping them intact. This is the kind of attention activism that is required to protect our learning.
Despite his arguments against the exploitation of human attention, Burnett is not against technology in and of itself., “I’m not anti-tech. I’m anti-exploitation.” He described his own incorporation of AI and technology into his courses as a professor and the ways in which technology provides us with a connection. Technology is a part of education now, and Burnett actively acknowledges this by asking students to use
AI in certain assignments. Students use chatbots to engage in conversation about the course subject, and in doing so the course incorporates our evolving technology into a place of learning. The invention of these technologies on their own is not the problem—it is the loss of our intentional practices to be turned into money for a business.
The emergence of artificial intelligence has posed a lot of difficult questions to students and educators alike, particularly in the face of plagiarism and circumventing assignments using the tools of AI. Many educators, even at the same institutions, take widely different stances on the use of AI in their classrooms, some insisting that we must acknowledge its existence by incorporating it into their curriculum. Others are avidly against its use and believe that it is destroying the humanities by way of eliminating the process of thinking and reflection in writing.
Burnett’s speech provided an incredibly insightful perspective on how protecting our attention is a movement that must be collective. He closed by referencing an analogy that compares a movement to the process of “swailing,” where small brush fires are lit to restore the overall vegetation health and prevent future fires. The movement of attention activism turns towards lighting “smaller fires” to renew intentional practices of human attention and protect intellectual capacities from commodification. Burnett’s speech prompted the room to reflect on what it means to have attention in our changing, technological world.
Prof. Beisaw discusses ‘The Archaeology of American Protest’
Tina Mao Guest Columnist
In recent years, protests seem to have undergone a social transformation. Some argue that what used to be acts of resistance performed exclusively by activists have become a new form of social gathering, geared toward progressively-minded individuals on Saturday afternoons. Dr. April Beisaw, archaeologist and Professor of Anthropology at Vassar, finds herself wondering: As protests in America today appear to grow more and more frequent, are they also becoming less impactful? Beisaw sought to answer that exact question when she began writing her newest book, “The Archaeology of American Protest,” with UMass Boston archaeologist Dania Jordan-Talley around five years ago. On Wednesday, Nov. 5, I had the privilege of listening to Beisaw discuss the work— which was published Oct. 28, 2025—with the Vassar community.
When I first heard the title of the book, I had a hard time piecing together the connection between “archaeology” and “protest.” Beisaw, having anticipated that this would be a common response from the audience, clarified at the outset that she defines “archaeology” as the study of the change in human experience over time and space. “A lot of people think that archaeology is something completely different from what I do,” she joked. “It doesn’t have to have dirt.”
Beisaw is fascinated by the question of how we select what we choose to remember when it comes to protests throughout American history, and how we frame the legacy of certain protests to create our national narrative. One of the protests that we are taught again and again as representative of the American spirit is the Boston Tea Party of 1773. We are taught about the Bos-
ton Tea Party as this national mythic event that highlights how effective protesting is—but this version of the story is far from being historically accurate. “In its time, the protest that was the Boston Tea Party was heavily criticized,” Beisaw explained, “It was written up as an act of cruel people who chose anarchy to provoke the reign of terror.” The protestors were not proudly resisting either: They dressed up as Native Americans to keep their identities secret, making it so that Native people would be the ones who suffered the consequences. In the aftermath of the protest, the passing of the Intolerable Acts caused significant suffering for Bostonians. It was not until 50 years later that police officer George R.T. Hewes wrote a memoir that would reframe the Boston Tea Party into a mythical story about the spirit of the American Revolution.
“Everything is the past—everything that justifies today is the past,” Beisaw commented. Protestors today often receive criticism from the public that what they are doing is a waste of time; that they should “get a job.” Yet they are unaware that the protestors who are now known as heroes of American history, such as the Boston Tea Party protestors, received the same public disdain during their time. When we look at protest history through the lens of archaeology, we begin to see the present as not a singular point in time, but as a never-ending condition.
As Beisaw put it, “I look for patterns over centuries. When you do this with protests, you see that protests rarely result in immediate change or clear resolution of conflict, that protesters can suffer consequences for their actions, and that Americans are fighting for the same foundational ideas that they have been since the beginning.”
Beisaw’s new book began to form as a
result of a research paper she published in 2020 with a former student. This paper sought to understand the Standing Rock protest against the Dakota Access Pipeline (DAPL) through the context of the Native peoples’ occupation of Alcatraz Island from 1969 to 1971. The DAPL, which was constructed in 2016 on unceded Sioux territory, is a direct violation of the Treaty of Fort Laramie (1868) that claims no white person or person shall be permitted to settle upon or occupy any portion of this land without the consent of Native Americans. Beisaw’s research on looking at the history of Native American resistance movements from an archaeological perspective inspired “The Archaeology of American Protest,” which tackles an ambitious scope of movements across U.S. history, from Bacon’s Rebellion in 1676 to the Stonewall Riots in 1969.
After the talk, I found myself wondering back to the question that Beisaw asked at the start of the talk: Are protests today becoming less effective? When I posed this question back to Beisaw after her presen-
tation, she answered that because social media has made protests more accessible to the average person, protests have become less impactful because they feel more like “parties.” Prior to the existence of social media, people attended protests because they knew someone who was organizing the protest; therefore, protesters felt a stronger sense of personal obligation to the cause. Beisaw brought up the Vassar community’s large-scale counter-protests against Westbury Baptist Church’s (WBC) demonstration on campus in 2013, for example. As a response to WBC members’ homophobic hate speech, Vassar decided to cancel classes so that its community could come together. The protest was so successful because of our profound, collective personal connection to the issue of the protest. Ultimately, Beisaw reminds us that social change is made possible through sustained efforts of activism; in other words, “what are we going to do after the protest?” If protests are becoming like “parties,” what do we do once the party is over?
MISCELLANY NEWS | VASSAR COLLEGE
Image courtesy of Tina Mao ’27.
HUMOR
From the desk of Josie Wenner, Humor Editor
High lead levels in Vassar water traced back to John Bradley sleep-leading Breaking News
Watergate hits Vassar: Who do we blame?
Maxes.”
We obeyed.
There we were: schmoozing up The Onion’s Head Writer with a basket of raw onions at last week’s Signature Program. He was unenthused by the handfuls of Greek yogurt we were feeding him from our jeans. After he escaped our clutches by rappelling off the Heartwood’s glass walls, we decided to head to the Salt Line for a drink. The iced water we drank before our shots of Tito’s tasted funky, but we thought nothing of it.
Our phones begin buzzing, along with our small, supple bodies. Thinking our Tinder notifs were exploding, we checked our phones sexily.
Our cracked screens showed us conflicting messages: “Need u back,” “Get your ass back here,” “Solve this or else.” These weren’t just the flirtatious musings of our boos, but actual cries for help an AI chatbot couldn’t fix. The messages—cryptic emails from dwixen@vassar.edu—described how campus water had turned.
Unsure of what to do next, we kept on drinking. After getting thoroughly sloshed, we had the grand idea to strip naked and plunge into the icy blanket of Sunset Lake. With the decreased amounts of water chestnuts, we broke through the surface. Water entered all our holes, seeping into our pores. With a cold tingle, we recognized that familiar umami taste: Deece water.
We realized the truth, drunk and wet amongst the wild geese: The College had been using Sunset Lake as our water supply, grinding water chestnuts to replace vital supplements.
Our wet phones lit up again. D. Wixen had emailed us: “Dry off pookies, the plot just got real. Meet me at the CDF Quad. Walk with the speed of an evil twink playing ‘Water’ by Tyla in his stickered Airpod
Once we arrived, the Vogelstein Quad (and Ferry House) began to rise like a drawbridge in the night. Light beckoned us to move forward. Inside, Agent Wixen’s wine cellar and mixologist station awaited. After we guzzled dry martinis and some loose olives, Wixen shared major intel in the form of a riddle: “Buzzy buzz buzz buzz, the chest of water brings the huzz. Let the dripping chestnut speak, big ol’ balls to eat eat eat.” Wixen kicked us out immediately.
What could this mean? Taking a walk around Main, we despaired. But as the old adage goes: “The world is my oyster. Baby, come touch the pearl.”
And just like that, Pearl Metcalf ’26 appeared. Like a crystalline fantasy of old, she began to enlighten us with the truth. The plot ran deeper than we expected: Vassar had genetically engineered water chestnut to listen in on student conversations. The goal: Discover who stole the spikeball set from PB’s porch.
They were ultimately successful. A rogue bear was seen being carted away by campus police, spikeball fragments visible in his teeth. The College used the same trailer they use for campus hayrides to take the bear away. Unfortunately, campus police forgot that five students were on the bales waiting for the next spooky adventure…yikes.
The bear, now full, fell fast asleep— dreaming of water chestnuts and making love in Yosemite.
Because the College was successful, they switched the water supply back to its original source. Students rejoiced, thanking us with hugs, kisses and Fizz posts with “#HuzzWins.” Even though we technically did nothing but swim naked and get drunk, we appreciated the good vibes.
But we would do something. The bear es-
caped from the College’s custody (with our help). Why would we do such a thing?
With our increased strength from water chestnut intake, we decided to defend PB’s notorious spikeball honor. Gathering cans of beans, we set up a gloopy arena in a kiddy pool on the roof of the Heartwood. Hotel guests watched from the patio below, holding empty jars to catch falling beans. Our goal: wrestle the bear into banishment.
Covered in bean sauce, we fought until our legs gave out, powered by determination and the joy of clean water. With one final gust of vigor, the bear slipped on smushed beans, falling onto a pillow of shrubs. He
Annie McShane/The Miscellany News.
laid there, defeated, eventually scurrying away never to be seen again. Just like the Head Writer of The Onion
With beans in our ears, and unblemished H2O in our hearts, we applied to host a Signature Program at the Institute next fall. Instead of a written title for the program, we inserted the tongue out emoji followed by the water splash emoticon. We plan to invite a manatee, the color Yellow and the man who invented water: Scott Pilgrim.
In community, As “Storytellers for Change,” The Liquid Lurkers
Luke Jenkins, Chloe Rogers
Liquid Lurkers
HUMOR
Vassar to open study abroad programs in places that suck
Wren Buehler Proud Baltimorean
Shock gripped the Vassar campus following last week’s announcement that approval would be retracted for several beloved study abroad options, soon to be replaced with new programs in “places that suck.” In an official statement from the Office of International Studies (OIS), it was explained that study abroad was “at this point, basically a vacation,” and the limp-wristed Vassar populace needed to be toughened up by some time in a place that sucks.
While many programs are still in development, and won’t be announced until the end of the semester, several have already been revealed, including the Great Pacific Garbage Patch, the Sinister Josselyn Cav-
ern, a maximum security Brazilian prison and London. Students studying abroad this spring have already been assigned new locations, while those currently abroad will be banned from Vassar campus until they grow some hair on their chest.
Reactions to the news are mixed, with many students being staunchly opposed. “This is not what study abroad is supposed to be about,” said Brock Blake ’27. “Studying abroad is about seeing new places. Meeting new people. Exposing yourself to a new culture, and then sequestering yourself in the dorms and getting shitfaced with the other Americans six nights a week. How am I supposed to do that in the Sahara? This is probably the worst thing that’s ever happened,” complained Blake.
Others are more positive. Edith Wayne ‘27 said that she was “overjoyed” with her
assignment. “I keep meaning to rid myself of all worldly desires, but I just can’t find the time. That’s why I’m excited for Vassar’s Monastery Exchange Program, which will allow a Buddhist monk to come get schnasty [sic] in the THs for a semester while I eat pine needles and prepare to be mummified alive through the process of sokushinbutsu.”
“I kind of don’t care,” admitted Tim “Crunch” Hamilton ‘27. “According to the OIS, I’ve never experienced real hardship in my life and I completely squander the privileges I’ve been handed from birth, so they’re sending me to the worst place they can think of. Unfortunately for them, I’m already from Philadelphia.”
Some students, outraged by this new direction for study abroad, have taken to the streets, demanding that they not be sent to
various inaccessible mountaintops, active volcanoes or bubbling oilfields. Vassar admin, per usual, responded to criticism in a measured and accountable way: by herding protesters into a shipping container and then mailing them to a desert island somewhere in the Southern Ocean.
Thus far, the experience has failed to harden the bodies and minds of Vassar students, but the OIS holds out hope. “Come on, something’s gotta work, right? We’ve tried every other way of turning our students into rugged studs: cigarettes, steroids, getting them really into a semi-ironic lumberjack thing. Nothing. Honestly, if this is a dead end, we’re kind of fucked.”
As of publication, Vassar is committed to making sure all its on-campus students can experience somewhere that sucks by making everyone live in Raymond House.
Dear scooter scum...reproachfully, fearful pedestrians
It was a blustery October morning, and the red leaves fell around me like tiny blazing embers. I was making my journey to the grand halls of Gordon Commons when I spotted out of the corner of my eye a sign of impending doom: five mounted riders, arranged in a V-like attack formation, similar to geese or fighter jets. This battalion of e-scooter cavalry sped towards me, a whiny din growing louder and louder. I had but a second to act before being trampled by the stampede. Fearing for my bodily condition, I jumped to the side and took refuge in the bushes surrounding the Nircle.
Following this traumatic experience, I have come to one resolute conclusion: E-scooters must go. To convince you of my position, dear reader, I will enumerate my complaints with the electric evil before presenting a modest proposal to solve the epidemic at hand.
The first and greatest issue with e-scooters
is the terrible safety concern they pose to us, the law-abiding denizens of the Vassar College sidewalks. “Put simply, scooters go fast; people do not! When a scooter meets an unsuspecting pedestrian, CRASH and owies ensue!” says Professor of Anthropology Martha Kaplan. Moreover, e-scooters endanger their own users. Truly, no person should ever desire to ride one, lest they, at great speed, collide with a low railing and be flung over the handlebars, where their head will be smitten upon a rock.
Beyond the safety concerts, e-scooters’ general presence is a detriment to the campus milieu. As a matter of principle, e-scooters are uncool. Their piercing shriek assaults my eardrums every morning, shattering the tranquility of the Hudson River Valley. Would Vassar have gained its picturesque reputation if, throughout its history, its sidewalks hummed with incessant electric buzzing and thronged with two-wheeled death traps? How would Jackie Kennedy feel if she had to walk to class every day fearing for her life?
However, what strikes me the most is how unnecessary e-scooters are. Vassar’s campus is known for packing great beauty into a small area. At the beginning of the year, President Bradley spoke to the first-year students about the importance of taking time to pause on Vassar’s meandering sidewalks— advice that has been ignored by much of the student body. The way people ride e-scooters, you would think they were cruising in the left lane on I-87 North towards Albany.
In my time pondering this subject, I have become acutely aware of two pieces of knowledge. Firstly, e-scooters are electrical, and secondly, electrical fires burn at great length. Naturally, my solution is as follows: burn them all!
Such a solution promises several benefits, including: an environmentally-friendly solution to the many months of winter heating, a cathartic release for those wronged by e-scooters and a ceremonial eternal flame that shall be displayed atop the roof of the house reigning as Brewer Games champion. It is with a (scooter-sustained) fire in my
[Students] A very special Sunday email
Josie Wenner
Shadow President Bradley
Dear all,
So many things happening this week! What busy, busy bees we are. Bees in a hive, and I am the queen. Bow down, bees. Read my email and weep.
Update on October Break Tree Removal
As you may know, several diseased and non-diseased trees were cut down over October break. Many students were disheartened by this and held open dialogues in restorative circles of togetherness. We hear you, and we are planning on cutting down even more trees over Thanksgiving. The whole quad will look like an apocalyptic wasteland. Questions? Reach out to gofuckyourself@vassar.edu for more information.
VCDNOTC WINS!
This weekend, the Vassar College Drills, Nails and Other Tools Club (VCDNOTC) took home the win at the National Collegiate Drilling Competition finals. They drilled over 200holes in a mere 30 seconds to win the gold medal. VCDNOTC meets on Mondays and Wednesdays at 4:00 p.m. in the Noyes basement. Interested in joining?
Reach out to Sparky Hammer at shammer@vassar.edu.
Spotlight on…the Deece
This week, the Deece will be serving Concept Concept at the Global Kitchen, inspired by. The dining team intends to highlight the cuisine of as well as the flavors from. Enjoy food at Global this week! Any questions? Reach out to the Vassar dining team.
Vassar Prowler - Any Information?
Several students have come forward with stories of a mysterious figure wearing a black cape sneaking around Vassar’s campus, especially near the South Commons. This person allegedly wears a cowl with little bat ears on it and has been following students home at night. Does Vassar have our very own Dark Knight, or is there a predator on the prowl? Please reach out to Campus Security with any information or new sightings.
Join Misc Humor!
The Miscellany News humor section is looking for more writers! Led by three beautiful, hilarious, kind, intelligent, stunning, contemplative, charming, witty, friendly, loving, gorgeous, hysterical editors, Misc humor is the place for any comical articles, cartoons or satire. When you write for Misc
humor, your hair becomes shinier, your skin clears up, your grades improve, your crush smiles at you in the Deece and your Arlington bucks magically refill. Questions? Reach out to Josie Wenner at jwenner@vassar.edu.
Staying Off My Phone!
For the past few years, in an attempt to stay off my phone, I’ve offered $5 gift cards to the Crafted Kup to students who catch me walking and looking at my phone (which buys half of a small black coffee). However, I’m sick of this. From now on, whenever someone “catches” me using my phone, which is my God-given right as an American citizen, they will owe me a gift card. Pay up, bitches.
Where is John?
I let my husband John out for his nightly walk on Monday and I haven’t seen him since. Usually, he finds his way back after a day or two, but sometimes he gets distracted by his own reflection and tends to wander. He is wearing a nightgown and sleepy hat and carrying a candlestick. Please reach out to me if you find him, and tell him to pick up some milk on his way back.
Mystery Picture
Last Week: Last week’s mystery picture
was a zoomed-in photograph of an obscure part of campus that only dweebs and losers would ever go to. The first person to get it right was Dorkus Malorkus. The second, third, fourth and fifth people to get it right were Charles Ladder, Port Starboard, Baby Dunce and Brohn Jadley, respectively. CONGRATULATIONS!!!!!
This week: Where is this?
Quote of the Week “Yes, I did, yes, I did. Somebody please tell ‘em who the F I is.” (Nicki Minaj)
Keep it real, bee-yotches, President Bradley
heart that I write this, calling to all Vassar students: Bring your e-scooters to the Nircle, and together, we will gleefully watch the flames rise into the night.
Annie McShane/The Miscellany News.
Josie Wenner/The Miscellany News.
Mercedes Fippinger, Jared Palumbo Moving Targets
ARIES March 21 | April 19
HOROSCOPES
Emma daRosa Allergic to Shellfish
Can you give it a rest with the whole shellfish allergy thing? “Oh, sorry, I can’t do sushi Wednesday, I have a shellfish allergy.” This is why you don’t have friends. Grow up!
LIBRA Sept. 23 | Oct. 22
TAURUS April 20 | May 20
Shhh, little baby, listen closely. It’s gonna be ok. Next time they have ciabatta at the Deece, cut it open and butter it. Shhh, just sprinkle it with garlic powder. Put it butter side down in the panini press. Garlic bread. It’s all gonna be ok, baby.
GEMINI May 21 | June 20
CANCER June 21 | July 22
This week you’re going to face a ton of pressure to enjoy tuna sandwiches. I’m so sorry you’re facing this. I think that if someone invites you to grab lunch, respond with “NO, NO TUNA FOR ME DEAREST, THANK YOU VERY MUCH.” Then they’ll know you WON’T be doing tuna lunch.
I think you should put yourself out there more this week. Start a radio show that you record outside the Retreat. Interview people waiting in line for chicken nuggets. Why nuggets? Where nuggets? When nuggets? Figure it out, I’m no radio presenter.
LEO July 23 | Aug. 22
Maybe spend 24 hours in the Deece this week. Your life seems SO boring and sleeping on the grill would be such a rush. Like, will they notice you? Will you be grilled? Will you be paired with a lovely dipping sauce? Much to consider…
VIRGO Aug. 23 | Sept. 22
It’s so cold and rainy outside. On your walk to the Deece, if you see anyone carrying a jacket or sweater, snatch it right out of their hands and put it on. You should look like those people doing the 100 layers of sweater challenge by the time you arrive.
SCORPIO Oct. 23 | Nov. 21
If you go to Tasty Tuesday this week, you’re going to humiliate yourself. Like, you’re going to order without realizing you don’t have enough Arlington bucks, so your card will decline, and then you’ll drop your wallet on the ground, and you’ll spill your food all over trying to pick it up. Better luck next time.
Happy birthday to any Scorpios born this week! Gotta be the best week to be a Scorpio. How do I know? It’s nacho week at Street Eats! Well, it’s nacho week for those allowed to get Street Eats…oh, did you not know? Yeah, no more Street Eats for people who drink oat-nog. Yeah…sorry, it’s a higher up decision. Yikes…
SAGITTARIUS Nov. 22 | Dec. 21
Maybe you should take more risks this week. You’re always playing it so safe. It’s why your mom calls you a loser on the phone every night. Stop calling her every night! Anyway, ask the guy at Oasis for a little more when he’s filling your bowl of quinoa et. al. 50/50 shot he adds a little more or puts poison quinoa in. Do it!
CAPRICORN Dec. 22 | Jan. 19
The tostada concept at Global this week will make you realize that you need tostad-asking people out. No more longing looks from across the nonagonal table. Walk right up to them, get on both knees (Shane Dawson style), and ask them to join you at the other end of the nonagon. Swoon!
AQUARIUS Jan. 20 | Feb. 18
Watch out!!! You’re in danger! As you’re reading this, someone is sneaking huge amounts of star anise into your soup! Ah…too late. Well. I don’t know, maybe you’ll like it. Licorice is a controversial flavor, but your haircut is controversial too. Good luck, anise boy.
PISCES Feb. 19 | March 20
You need to start asking people for what you want. No longer will you hover from afar, watching to see if that person sitting at a booth is leaving. Go take their empty plates away. Tell them it’s last call. Start vacuuming and sighing really loudly at them. Eventually you’ll convince them that the Deece is a restaurant and they’ve REALLY overstayed their welcome.
OPINIONS
Burning dread with Bodhicitta
Jacob Cifuentes Opinions Editor
On Oct. 28, the morning I began writing this article, BBC News published an update to their live updates page about the horrific situation in Sudan. “Deaths from conflict immeasurable, Sudanese man tells BBC,” the headline reads. We are introduced to Althair Hashim, a man whom I know little about. Yet, when I read his quote, I tremble. He told the reporters that he had lost more than 10 family members in 10 days, and that his close, soup-kitchen-frequenting friend was executed along with other volunteers. BBC reported, “Altahir says it feels ‘like the world just ignores our suffering.’”
To most of us at Vassar College, the Sudanese civil war and its atrocities are far removed from our reality. It does not really matter how many people get brutalized or executed; construction noises will wake you up, and assignments will still be due at 11:59 p.m. However, I cannot get over this feeling of immediate helplessness. Yes, I am not the one who is helpless in this situation, nor in many of the ecological, economic and humanitarian crises happening globally. Yet I feel as if I am implicated, by virtue of sharing a planet with all of the people affected and at fault. Even closer to home, we are watching as millions of Americans are losing their SNAP benefits, and other residents, regardless of citizenship, are being targeted by an administration that works outside of the law. Some may label my concern for the world as empathy. I do not entirely reject that label, but I would rather describe this feeling as dread.
“Doomerism” is a generally online move -
ment that views lasting progress as unattainable. Bryan Walsh from Vox argues that the worst threat to humanity is not the usual culprits of AI-fueled climate collapse, nuclear war-mongering or genocide. Rather “It’s that we will cease believing in the one force that raised humanity out of tens of thousands of years of general misery: the very idea of progress.” Walsh runs through statistics and talking points that convince me my dread is unfounded and that life has historically improved. He is correct about the rising quality of life, but how can I fully appreciate all my privileges and comforts knowing that this development is inextricably linked to colonization and resource extraction? How can I be comfortable with the fact that the amazing laptop I write this article on, according to Amnesty International, was likely made using lithium and other materials extracted from exploitative mining practices in the Congo and Rwanda?
The crazy part is that the doomers and I have the majority position. In 2021, 56 percent of global youth agreed that humanity is doomed, per Vice. Fast forward four years, and many of this same age demographic are burning down their government buildings. One might ask why Gen-Z has become disillusioned with our intentionally fractured societies, but that question is not currently interesting, namely because it has already been tackled ad nauseam. I prefer to ask, what do we do with this collective dread?
Chogyam Trungpa, a problematic and confusing figure in the early history of Western Buddhism, taught one very profound lesson that yields the most supreme answer to my question. In his book, “Shambhala: The Sacred Path of the Warrior,”
Trungpa elucidates on the genuine heart of sadness. If you search for this heart within yourself, “You feel sore and soft, and if you open your eyes to the world, you feel tremendous sadness.” Later, Trungpa remarks that the embrace of tenderness leads to a willingness to “let the world tickle your heart, your raw beautiful heart.”
My—and I assume many others’—first instinct when facing the cruelty of this world is to develop callousness. It is easy to look around and say, “Well… nothing I can do,” and then develop a slothful apathy. The harder choice is to embrace tenderness. This is the point of cultivating bodhicitta, or awakened heart as Trungpa translates it. Simply put, bodhicitta is the yearning for the collective liberation from suffering of all beings that can feel pain across the cosmos. There is no ant too insignificant, no demon too evil and no politician too corrupt to be forsaken from the radiant compassion of bodhicitta. When falling into doomerism, we must do a sort of alchemy and transform our dread and helplessness into an all-encompassing, yet not naive, compassion.
Right now, bodhicitta may seem like an impractical, vague and lofty concept. To clear up misconceptions, Dzongsar Jamyang Khyentse, a Bhutanese monk and writer, outlines two aspects of bodhicitta in his book “Not For Happiness.” The first is this aspiration to liberate all beings. Khyentse remarks that the genuine wish for collective awakening to truth and freedom from suffering is a much more sophisticated level of compassion than simple concern for the downtrodden. Aspiration bodhicitta acknowledges that not only are those in Sudan, Skid Row, Palestine or Ukraine living harshly, but the person who is pray-
ing for them also suffers and is in need of awakening. The other is the bodhicitta of application, which involves practicing the six paramitas: generosity, discipline, patience, diligence, meditative concentration and wisdom. All departments that our world—myself included—are lacking in. While it may seem that the goal of bodhicitta is to awaken all beings, such is a misconception. One of the bodhicitta vows is to liberate all beings, despite it being impossible. The sadness from “the heart of sadness” comes from truly believing that the vast majority of people are ignorantly trapped in a mentally fabricated web of negativity. This illusory nature of this web is what one must awaken to, and thereby be free from suffering itself. I do not believe that our world will get any better, and every day the list of humanitarian issues lengthens. Still, I have found bodhicitta to be the best antidote to burning my dread.
Editor argues against grammar
Editor
Ispend a lot of time thinking about grammar. This might sound cheesy, but it is true: Whether I am writing an essay, editing articles for The Miscellany News or playing a game of Bananagrams with my housemates, I often find myself wondering about the “correct” way of saying things. And yet, I am still unconvinced that any use of language can be truly incorrect.
In a post on his blog, English writer Michael Rosen argues that language precedes grammar, stating, “Grammar is a descriptive apparatus to describe something, not the thing itself.” By positioning grammar as a tool that can be used to describe existing language use— rather than a set of rules to be imposed upon speakers—Rosen effectively illustrates the reasoning behind linguistic descriptivism. In the quest to describe language use, descriptivism and prescriptivism have long been the two main schools of thought. A descriptive approach seeks to reflect real-life language use, while prescriptivism encourages speakers to follow traditional grammar rules. Of the two, I almost always favor descriptivism. For example, I often get annoyed by the claim that something “is not a real word.” While this opinion gets me into arguments during Bananagrams, I stand by it. To me, any word with a comprehensible meaning should be considered “real.” The Merriam-Webster dictionary defines a “word” as being “a speech sound or series of speech sounds that symbolizes and communicates a meaning.” The English language does not have any strict parameters for accepting words. If a word is con-
sistently used by a community of speakers who understand its meaning, then there is no reason why its veracity should be questioned.
One semi-recent example is the word “irregardless,” which Merriam-Webster—a self-proclaimed descriptivist dictionary—recognized in 2020. Several pedantic grammarians criticized the dictionary, with one X (formerly Twitter) user even proclaiming that the move marked “the death of the English language.”
This claim is dramatic for several reasons. First, as Merriam-Webster argued in the word’s Usage Notes, “irregardless” easily meets the dictionary’s rules for inclusion, having been used by millions of people since its first known use in 1847. Furthermore, I would argue that accepting a new word into English is a marker of a vibrant, healthy language—not a dying one. In fact, English has a long history of both accepting new words and considerably shifting its grammatical structures over time. During my sophomore year, I took ENGL 213: “The English Language,” a course taught by Professor Mark Amodio. In it, we charted the history and development of the language, from its Proto-Indo-European origins to the present day. When looking at this history, it is clear that language development is far from static. The English that we speak today would be almost wholly incomprehensible to speakers of Old English. Since their time, English has dropped its grammatical gender and absorbed thousands of loan words from foreign languages. Therefore, it is illogical to concern ourselves with the recent changes in our language—when it is, in fact, this very flexibility that has allowed English to remain useful through the centuries.
Moreover, our preoccupation with minute grammatical rules is a relatively new one. Apostrophes were not included in English until the 1500s. Geoffrey Chaucer, who is widely considered “the father of English literature,” never encountered one during his lifetime. Similarly, English spellings were largely unstandardized until the invention of the printing press. Even after this invention, the spelling of words was called into question as recently as 1906, when President Theodore Roosevelt proposed simplifying several spellings. These simplifications included changing “through” to “thru” and “missed” to “mist.” As you might assume, Roosevelt’s alterations were rejected by the American people. However, you may recognize a few of his shortened words in modern texts and social media posts—the existence of which is yet another reminder of the fluidity of language development.
My opposition to prescriptive grammar stems from more than its historical inaccuracy, however. I am also wary of touting “correct” grammar as a marker of supremacy. For example, those who refuse to respect gender-neutral pronouns often claim that the singular they pronoun is “incorrect.” This misgendering is not out of cruelty, such proponents claim; they are merely strict adherents to English grammar. This stance is both bigoted and blatantly untrue: The singular “they” pronoun has been used for hundreds of years. It can be found in the work of canonical English writers such as William Shakespeare and Jane Austen. However, even without this backing from the canon, I would never be in favor of prioritizing technically “correct” language use over human benefit. The purpose
of language is to facilitate understanding and connection. Articulating the grammatical rules underlying language should be used as a tool to enhance this understanding, not to promote cruelty.
I am not proposing that we abandon grammatical standardization altogether. There is, of course, a lot to be gained from the institution of grammar. For publications, such as The Miscellany News, this is especially true. Keeping our style consistent ensures readability and keeps our processes streamlined. I will continue to make corrections in articles, and The Misc will continue to follow the AP Style Guide—apologies to Oxford comma supporters everywhere. Additionally, there is value in correcting unintentional mistakes: No one wants to be caught mixing up “to” and “too.” But, by and large, I argue that these very purposes are the best uses of “correct” grammar. When used to enhance clarity, grammar is an important tool. But to insist that one way of communication is more correct than another is untrue. This is the concept that you will find me arguing against—irregardless of what others think.
Allison Lowe Managing
Annie McShane/The Miscellany News. Luke Jenkins/The Miscellany
Our goal with Brewers Ballin’ is to feature Vassar athletes who starred for their team the week previous to publishing. If you would like to nominate an athlete, please email hfrance@vassar.edu.
Brewers Ballin’: Hoffman shines in LL Playoffs Brewers Ballin’
Name: Karina Hoffman
Year: Junior
Team: Field Hockey
Stats: Hoffman scored less than three minutes into the Liberty League Field Hockey Final to set the tone for the Brewers. The Brewers went up 2-0 just 20 minutes later, holding onto the 2-0 lead before the scoring heated up in the fourth quarter. Union answered with a goal with less than 10 minutes left in the match, cutting the lead to one. But the Junior forward answered, assisting on a goal by Zoe Robinson ’29 less than two minutes later. Hoffman scored both goals in the Brewers’ semi-final victory, and has tabbed 25 points on the year— second most on the squad to Robinson.
Statement: “I’m really proud of my team. I never have to worry about whether they are really committed because every practice, they are giving 100%. It is so satisfying to see it pay off this year and I love them more and more every day.”
Recently in Vassar Brewers sports
Women’s Soccer wins Liberty League Championship
The squad earned its first-ever Liberty League championship on Nov. 9 in a 1-0 victory over RIT. Ava Holman ’29 notched the singular goal, and Lindsey Nihei ’26 earned the tournament’s Most Outstanding Performer.
Women’s Rugby wins Tri-State Conference Title
For the tenth consecutive year, the squad won the Tri-State Conference Title, routing Fairfield 88-5.
Women’s Fencing starts season 5-2 at Vassar Invitational
With victories over FDU, Lafayette, Drew, Yeshiva and Hunter, the Brewers are off to a strong start in their 2025 campaign. The epee squad was the brightest spark for the Brewers, finishing the day with a 43-20 record.
Image courtesy of Karina Hoffman ’27.
Dodgers clinch back-to-back titles
Armaan Desai Columnist
Whata series! Congratulations to the Los Angeles Dodgers for winning back-to-back World Series titles after narrowly defeating the Toronto Blue Jays in what will no doubt go down as one of the greatest MLB championships of all time. Game 7 averaged 51 million viewers across the United States, Canada and Japan, making it the highest-watched MLB game in 34 years. Pitcher Yoshinobu Yamamoto won World Series MVP after pitching and winning Games 2, 6 and 7, including the masterful 10th and 11th innings in Game 7 to secure the title.
Entering the series as heavy underdogs, the Blue Jays put up a statement 11-4 win in Game 1, including a whopping nine-run sixth inning. Catcher Alejandro Kirk led the way with three runs, two RBI’s and one home run. Toronto fans took to the streets and social media after this exciting win, but it was short-lived after the Dodgers evened the series in Game 2, led by Yamamoto (nine IP, eight K).
The two teams headed to Los Angeles for Game 3, which resulted in an 18-inning 6.5hour slugfest—the second longest World Series game of all time. The Dodgers edged the
Blue Jays 6-5 with a walk-off home run from Freddie Freeman, making him the first player ever to hit multiple walk-off homers in World Series history. However, this amazing accomplishment was overshadowed by an absolute masterclass performance from superstar Shohei Ohtani. “Shohei’s game,” Freeman said. “I hope we don’t lose sight… our starting pitcher tomorrow got on base nine times tonight. Just incredible.”
Ohtani posted a jaw-dropping stat line: 4/4 Hits/At Bats, two HR, three Runs and three Runs Batted In (RBIs). Ohtani also became the first player to reach base nine times in a postseason game, as well as the first player ever to be intentionally walked four times in a postseason game. The craziest part is that this record breaking game was not even Ohtani’s best game this postseason. In Game 4 of the NLCS against the Milwaukee Brewers, Ohtani pitched six shutout innings with 10 strikeouts, and on top of that, he went 3/3 H/AB for three home runs—two incredibly difficult record-breaking feats on both sides of the ball- and he did it in one game. Ohtani continues to surprise fans and break records, already cementing himself as one of the greatest baseball players of all time. Despite the Dodgers heavily shifting the momentum, the Blue Jays were able to weather the storm in Game 4, winning 6-2
and cooling off Ohtani’s fire—holding him to zero hits. Superstar Vladimir Guerrero Jr. led the way for the Jays with 2/4 H/AB, two runs, two RBIs and one homer. The Blue Jays flew back to Toronto and capped off Game 5 with a dominant 6-1 win, giving them a commanding 3-2 advantage in the series—one game away from what would have been their first championship since 1993. The Jays held Ohtani to another 0/4 day, and Guerrero Jr. posted another home run in the victory. The light at the end of the tunnel was visible for the Jays, but one obstacle still stood in their way: Yamamoto was set to pitch Game 6.
Yoshinobu Yamamoto stepped up to the mound and delivered, posting six K’s on six IP, as well as only one Earned Run. The Dodgers maintained control over the game, and in the bottom of the ninth inning, the Jays were desperate for a score. Addison Barger stepped up to the plate and hit a line drive missile all the way to the back wall, where the ball would ultimately end up wedged in between the outfield padding and the ground. This evoked the “lodged ball rule,” meaning the play was blown dead and both runners were awarded two bases. Fans initially went crazy, as they believed the play resulted in a game-tying inside the park home run. The Dodgers would take Game 6
3-1, and the stage was set for the first World Series Game 7 since 2019.
The Blue Jays opened Game 7 with a three-run home run in the third inning by Bo Bichette. Tensions were high and emotions were flaring in the fourth inning as Dodgers pitcher Justin Wrobleski hit Blue Jays shortstop Andre Gimenez two times in a row with a pitch, causing the benches to clear. The Jays had a solid lead until Dodgers batter Max Muncy hit a solo home run in the eighth inning, and then Miguel Rojas tied the game at 4-4 in the ninth inning with another solo home run. The Dodgers then made an unprecedented pitching change— bringing in Yamamoto in the bottom of the ninth off of zero days’ rest. They were able to survive bases loaded by the Blue Jays, and the battle was headed to extra innings. In the 11th inning, Dodgers catcher Will Smith hit the game-winning home run to give the Dodgers the 5-4 lead, and shortstop Mookie Betts made an incredible defensive double play to give the Dodgers their second consecutive World Series title.
Both the Dodgers and Blue Jays provided us with some of the most exciting playoff baseball we have ever seen. It is back to the drawing board for the Blue Jays, and the Dodgers will head into the offseason as the champs once again.
Gambling turmoil strikes MLB
Henry France Sports Editor
For decades, professional sports gambling scandals were few and far between. Accessibility made the illicit activity challenging to access. But on May 14, 2018, in a 6-3 decision following a six-year legal battle, the U.S. Supreme Court struck down the Professional and Amateur Sports Protection Act of 1992. The Act was the federal statute that had restricted state-authorized sports gambling to primarily Nevada for 26 years, clearing the way for widespread access to gambling.
Over the past six years, the legal and financial unraveling at the intersection of professional sports and sports gambling has been profound. Dozens of professional athletes, coaches, officials and team personnel have been indicted and convicted of gambling-related offenses.
Most recently, Cleveland Guardians pitchers Emmanuel Clase and Luis Ortiz have been charged with sharing inside information about their pitches with bettors. This hit comes just weeks after the NBA’s biggest scandal in years. Federal prosecutors allege that Clase and Ortiz received thousands of dollars in bribes from bettors in return for tips on the variety and speed of certain pitches. Sportsbooks have options for bettors to wager on individual pitches at specified points in games. In July, MLB commissioner Rob Manfred told reporters that certain bets were “unnecessary and particularly vulnerable.” These were the exact vulnerable bets that were exploited by the two pitchers in a scheme to “misle[a]d the public, and betray America’s pastime,” according to the federal indictment unsealed by federal prosecutors on Sunday, Nov. 9.
Prosecutors allege that between May 2023 and June 2025, Clase agreed with bettors to throw specific pitches in specific games so that the bettors and Clase would profit from successful wagers. Around June 2025, Ortiz joined the scheme. Before a June 15 game against the Seattle Mariners, Ortiz agreed to throw a ball for his first pitch of the sec-
ond inning in exchange for a $10,000 split between him and Clase. Bettors won at least $450,000 from betting platforms on pitches thrown by Clase and Ortiz, according to the indictment, with the majority coming from Clase’s throws. The two were charged with wire fraud conspiracy, honest services wire fraud conspiracy, money laundering conspiracy and conspiracy to influence sporting contests by bribery.
In July, the two players were placed on leave after the MLB initiated an investigation into suspicious wagering activity on individual pitches in their games.
Ortiz was arrested in Boston on Sunday, Nov. 9 and appeared in federal court there on Monday, Nov. 10. Clase was not in custody as of Sunday afternoon. Ortiz’s lawyer said his client was innocent of the charges, as did Clase’s lawyer.
This indictment is the third involving
gambling on professional sports brought by federal prosecutors in the Eastern District in the past month. Professional sports and legalized gambling find themselves increasingly at odds, begging the question: what now?
In a time when gambling is becoming more accessible by the day, with futures gambling platforms like Polymarket and Kalshi growing exponentially in popularity, it seems unlikely that regulation is anywhere on the horizon. Polymarket and Kalshi allow individuals to wager on anything from professional sports game outcomes, to Grammy nominations, to the length of the government shutdown and way, way more. Professional sports may be just the tip of the iceberg in an oncoming saga of gambling conspiracies.
While the expansion of legal sports betting markets has illuminated the wrongdoings of
these athletes, proponents of legalization argue that the transparency and structure of the platforms enable monitoring and oversight. Without the record-keeping and cooperation of sportsbooks, federal prosecutors would be unable to identify the illicitelicit behavior in the first place.
It is perplexing to comprehend why Clase and Ortiz would engage in such a scheme, collectively earning millions of dollars annually for legally playing baseball. The athletes each now face up to 65 years in prison if convicted on all charges. Hopefully, the preceding weeks will serve as a warning to professional athletes, coaches, officials and all other individuals involved in the outcome of sporting events. All indicators point to an ongoing expansion of gambling accessibility, but the question remains as to whether this growth will lead to better oversight or decreased guardrails.
Image courtesy of Erik Drost via Wikimedia Commons.
The Miscellany Crossword Crossword Unplugged
By: Theo Burstyn-Paul
ACROSS
1. “Eleven plus two” and “twelve plus one”, for example
9. Medium bra size
13. Stadium frequenters
15. 1948 Hitchcock thriller
16. Location to be hit
17. Village People hit
18. Westernmost Aleutian island
19. Pure bliss
21. Sounds one might hear from a nest
24. Overflow (with)
25. “___ tova!” (Jewish New Year greeting)
28. Those bordering Iraq
32. It comes before sum.
35. Places of privileged seclusion
37. Oyster offering
39. Google : Android :: Apple : ___
40. Mex. misses
41. Meeting with a doctor
44. Orbiting research facility, in brief
45. Write a text again
46. Zones
48. Not interested in the govt.
50. 90s rock subgenre with bands hinted at in 19-, 37-, 54- and 63- across
54. Brie homophone?
57. ___ Piper
58. It is written
60. What one might submit to a shortform theater festival
63. Bagel’s center
64. “Don’t tell me the plot!”
65. Crossed eyes?
66. Like some wine glasses
DOWN
1. Showing or feeling no interest, for short
2. France, to España
3. Disputes
4. Co. that merged into Verizon
5. Queue after Q
6. “Not ___” (“Thumbs-down from me”)
7. French husband
8. Hägar the Horrible’s dog
9. Seven Sister college near Philadelphia
10. What one might wake up from with no memories
11. Merchandise ID
12. Podded plant
13. Opp. of legato, in music
14. “I don’t want to hear your excuses!”
20. Ford’s first minivan
22. Where Brutus was defeated
23. One who is in the know, for short
26. “___ can’t be!”
27. Scent
29. ___ Pot (sinus relief tool)
30. 401(k) alternatives
31. Leak sound
32. Practice fight
33. ___ the Frog (internet meme)
34. Enthralled
36. Belgian river
38. The Emperor’s New Clothes?
42. Many an ex-lib
43. Put-down to pick up?
47. Limber and graceful
49. Talk show host Jay and family
51. Frasier’s brother
52. First, second, reverse, etc.
53. Breyers rival
54. Car bar
55. Superlative suffix
56. Back of the neck
58. Your, of yore
59. Oddly shaped lip balm brand
61. Many a URL ending
62. Shop ___ you drop
