Cary Living Magazine

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retirement J A N UA RY | F E B R UA RY 2 0 1 0

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J a nua ry | F E B rua ry 2010 publisher/partner Gina Stephens advertising sales Myra Gammon Sarah Oglesby creative director Travis Aptt art director Jennifer Blue graphic design Heath Murray contributing writers Christa Gala | Kate Turgeon | Dan Bain April Maness | Matthew Moriarty | Jeanine Finelli Susan Ely | Dr. George T. Bartels photography April Maness Photography Timeless Photography Jennifer Robertson subscription inquiries Call 919.782.4710 or visit caryliving.com

Printed on 100% Recycled Paper

Cary Living is published six times annually.

Any reproduction in part or in whole of any part of this publication is prohibited without the express written consent of the publisher.

4818 Six Forks Road, Suite 204 Raleigh, NC 27609 Phone (919) 782-4710, Fax (919) 782-4763 www.CaryLiving.com Cary Living is not responsible for unsolicited manuscripts, photography or art. Unsolicited material is welcome and is considered intended for publication. Such material will become the property of the magazine and will be subject to editing. Material will be returned if accompanied by a self-addressed stamped envelope. Cary Living will not knowingly accept any real estate advertising in violation of U.S. equal opportunity law.

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PuBLISHEr’S nOTE

new year! happy

It is hard to believe that we are entering the seventh year publishing Cary Living. We are just as excited about this issue as we were about the very first issue. Cary and its surrounding areas have been fascinating to explore. as you know, many local, regional and national publications have closed their doors due to last year’s economic slowdown. While it hasn’t been easy, Cary Living has continued to be the most sought-out magazine in Western Wake County.

Our company has continued to grow since we started Cary Living in 2003. We also own Pinehurst Magazine and Southern Weddings in the Sandhills, and we launched Midtown Magazine covering the north Hills area in 2007. Finally, we are excited to announce that we are the new owners of Premier Baby & Child. Our goal with each and every publication is to provide interesting stories about the unique people and issues in our community. your opinions matter to us. We want to continue to hear from you. When we recently updated the look of Cary Living, we received great feedback from many of you – thank you! you also told us that you like our “people” stories. We are working hard to be your “favorite” local publication. as a mom of four myself, I relish any time I get to read – and when I do, I want to be both entertained and informed about what’s happening where I live. I find staying connected with local people and activities gives me a real sense of community and joy.

So keep those comments coming. Don’t be shy about letting us know what topics you enjoy and what you’d like to see more of in 2010.

Gina Pearce Stephens Publisher/Partner 4818 Six Forks road Suite 204 raleigh, nC 27609 919-782-4710 | gina@caryliving.com

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contents JANUARY | FEBRUARY 2010

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departments 20 30 60 66 71

chef’s corner calendar shades of green healthy living sightings

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features Today’s Retirement Options

Wellness, Care and Lots of Fun Retirement community options aren’t what they used to be!

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Dapper Design

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Valentine’s Splurges

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Meat The Family

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Heirloom Stitchery

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100th Anniversary Year

Former Trading Spaces designer Edward Walker offers help for your biggest design dilemmas.

Treats to spoil your love for under $100!

There once was a time in America when visiting the butcher shop wasn’t just an errand, it was an experience. With a new business, a local Apex family is renewing the tradition.

Longing to create something with your own hands that can be passed down to future generations? Sewing an heirloom garment is easier than you think!

“A smile is a curve that sets everything straight.” ~ Phyllis Diller

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special thanks to timeless photography for our bridal guide photography

Perfect Time to Join Scouts As the BSA prepares to hit the century mark, we talk to local volunteers about what Scouting means and why your children will want to join.

PLUS...Don’t miss our special pull-out bridal guide!

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TODAY’S RETIREMENT OFFERINGS:

Wellness, Care and

Lots of Fun It’s the proverbial elephant in the room. Everyone grows old, but nobody wants to talk about the related decisions – when to move into a retirement community and which one to choose. These decisions can be daunting, but only because people mistake retirement communities for the dismal nursing homes of old.

Today’s options are brighter and more enjoyable. Two popular styles are independent living communities – where services and activities are provided to healthy seniors – and continuing care retirement communities (CCRCs), which offer activities for healthy seniors as well as assisted living and nursing care for later in life. Here’s a look at some of Western Wake’s best options.

by DAN BAIN

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Windsor Point Located on 17 acres along Fuquay-Varina’s Broad Street, Windsor Point is a CCRC offering a small-town atmosphere with convenience to shopping, entertainment and medical care. The facility is family-owned and operated, and the owners have attempted to keep the atmosphere personal, says Kim Poindexter, marketing director. “There is a sense of family that residents feel when they come to Windsor Point,” she says.

The community has 281 units, a library, a gift shop/convenience store, a bank, a pharmacy, a billiard room, a card room, a parlor, an art room, a putting green, a beauty/barber shop and a fitness center with an indoor pool, hot tub and exercise room. Services include five different levels of health care to meet the residents’ changing needs as well as weekly housekeeping, meals, maintenance, transportation, excursions and activities.

The community holds parties on holidays and other special occasions such as its anniversary celebration in March, when residents attend Casino Night. Family members and friends are welcome to attend the annual Spring and Fall Festivals as well as other events. Activities during the rest of the year include regular exercise classes, weekly line dancing and singing, semi-monthly discussion groups, a memoir-writing class, Friday afternoon bingo, nightly games, visiting performers, movie nights, shopping

expeditions and various trips to cultural and historic landmarks across the state and up and down the East coast.

Poindexter says some units have a wait list, but others are available immediately. In either case, she recommends moving at a relatively young age. “Many of our residents will tell you that they are glad they made the decision to move to Windsor Point when they were younger. That way they could enjoy all that Windsor Point has to offer. This also takes the stress off of children having to make a decision in a crisis.”

Windsor Point has furnished apartments available for prospective residents to spend a night or two in order to “try out” the community before deciding, something Poindexter recommends.

“They can meet with residents, have lunch and dinner, participate in activities and really get a feel for the community,” she says.

Woodland Terrace

Woodland Terrace offers independent and assisted living, plus Alzheimer’s care. Located between Kildaire Farm Road and Southeast Maynard Road, the community has 80 independent living apartments, 24 independent living cottages, 36 assisted living units and 44 Alzheimer’s units. It’s unique in that it’s a rental community, says Sales and Marketing Director Wendy Mallon.

“Residents are able to enjoy month-to-month rental with a large number of services that are typically included in their base rent, without a huge up-front cost or lease,” Mallon explains.

The community has 22 acres of landscaping, including a lake, fountain, courtyard and raised garden boxes throughout. Residents

have access to chef-prepared meals, a recreation room, wellness programs, a library, a beautician/barber, Posit Science training, a state-of-the-art fitness center and housekeeping services.

Mallon believes Woodland Terrace staff offer another, less tangible service to prospective residents – reassurance. “During our tour process we try really hard to find out what it is that is most important to them, what is driving this move, how they hope their lives will change as a result of moving,” she relates. “As we tour, we focus on connecting each person to those things they have indicated are important to them. For example, if a daughter comes to us and is looking for a place for her mother, she may mention that her mom is not eating well and this has caused her to be weak and lose interest in day-to-day life. While touring, we will make sure we introduce her to a server or our dining services director. I’ve had folks tell me afterwards that is why they chose Woodland Terrace over others – we listened to what they needed and connected them with that service.”

Mallon says the best time to move is different for each individual. Still, she recommends starting the search early and says most families tour anywhere from three to seven communities before choosing one. “The key is to find a community that offers the services that created the need for you to begin looking in the first place, and is convenient to family so that they may visit,” she adds.

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Jordan Oaks Located on Penny Road near Kildaire Farm Road, Jordan Oaks is an independent living community with 115 garden apartments. The community welcomes pets and offers monthto-month leases. Manager Pat Fitzgerald points out that rent is truly all-inclusive. “All utilities, even cable, are included,” she says. “All meals, linen and housekeeping service, even toilet paper, light bulbs and trash bags are included.”

Other amenities include chef-prepared meals, transportation to appointments, complimentary laundry facilities, hiking trails, a billiard room, a library, an exercise room with Tai Chi lessons, a beauty salon/barber shop and an onsite manicurist, pedicurist and massage therapist. Additionally, the community employs two sets of live-in management teams. “We are available 24 hours a day for any emergency that occurs,” Fitzgerald explains. “Our managers cater to our residents. Our goal is to make all our residents feel safe, secure, and cared about.”

Jordan Oaks offers a full activity calendar and is part of a travel program in conjunction with its parent company, Holiday Retirement. Under the program, residents can stay for up to seven days at other communities across the U.S. and Canada, provided rooms are available.

Fitzgerald says family members are usually the first to know when the time is right for seniors to consider moving into a retirement community, as seniors are often reluctant to leave their current situation. To that end, she offers some pointers: “When looking back is all you do, it is time to join us and make new memories. When a daily diet consists of a sandwich, a TV dinner or leftovers, it is time to join us for a healthy variety of nutrition. When the best conversation is talking to the cat, it is time to join us and have someone your own age to talk to who understands what you are feeling because they, too, have been there. When you do not feel safe and are concerned who will be there if you have an emergency, we will be 24 hours a day.

When you are not driving any longer, let us help.”

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SearStone Under development at the intersection of Davis Drive and High House Road, SearStone occupies 75 acres of farmland that’s been in the founder’s family for at least eight generations. Architect Bill Sears designed the CCRC to help his parents enjoy their golden years on their family land.

Laura Lowe, director of sales and marketing, says SearStone will consist of a specialty retail village and a 43,000-square-foot clubhouse overlooking a treelined lake with a piazza and fountains. The clubhouse will include a state-of-the-art fitness center, a pool/ sauna, a cocktail lounge and three dining venues.

Nearby will be a concert conservatory and botanical garden. Lowe says residents can look forward to “a vibrant, maintenance-free lifestyle in a resort-like setting.”

The first phase of SearStone will consist of 171 homes, scheduled for completion in late 2011 – although pre-sale deposits are already being accepted. The community will include four different home styles and dozens of floor plans ranging from 1000-squarefoot, one-bedroom apartments to 3900-square-foot estate homes, most with garages or underground parking.

Residents will receive paid utilities (with the exception of phone service), home warranty, housekeeping services, wireless Internet service, maintenance, taxes and transportation – the last of which won’t always be necessary. “What makes SearStone unique is that all of the services you might need will be a walk or golf cart ride

away,” Lowe explains. “Our specialty retail village will include a CVS, café-style restaurants, banks and other amenities you find in the best communities – all without having to get in the car or take transportation. Compared to what most retirement communities offer as a small sundry shop, we will have retailers on our campus that you currently use but have to drive to – we bring that lifestyle directly to our residents.”

SearStone offers a health care continuum spanning in-home care, assisted living and skilled nursing. A state-of-the-art health care facility is planned for the campus, with private suites. The community will also offer Life Care, a program guaranteeing long-term care costs for the duration of the resident’s life. “SearStone is raising the bar on retirement living in the Cary market,” says Lowe.

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Glenaire managed by Presbyterian Homes inc., glenaire is a nonprofit ccrc. “Presbyterian Homes has over 50 years of experience providing services to the senior population,” says Patty Scotten, director of marketing. “glenaire’s retirement population benefits from a variety of delightful trips, activities and performances, but one of glenaire’s most outstanding services is the extensive health and fitness program.”

Scotten says the encompass program emphasizes eight dimensions of health and wellness. additionally, glenaire employs two full-time fitness instructors. “glenaire prides itself with an enviable reputation in health care,” Scotten exults. “The skilled nursing facility has a five-star rating and has achieved the highest possible standards in delivery of health services.”

This is important, she maintains, because the true value of a ccrc is its assurance that quality health services across a spectrum – assisted living, skilled nursing facilities, adult daycare and medical clinics – are available within the community. “Everyone hopes that they never utilize the services of a nursing facility, but it is a great relief and assurance to know that you have access to a reputable nursing facility if needed,” she empathizes. glenaire offers housekeeping services and full recreational, cultural and social calendars. its community center adjoins the

health care facility and the apartment homes via enclosed walkways and offers activities and perks that include two dining rooms, an aquatics center, a woodworking shop, a post office, a bank, a gift shop, an auditorium, a beauty/barber shop, an aerobics room and a stationary equipment room. The campus sits on 34 acres near the intersection of maynard and Kildaire Farm roads.

The community has 164 one- and two-bedroom apartments, two free-standing homes and 46 duplexes. The duplexes and homes range from 1750-2200 square feet, the apartments from 800-1150 square feet.

Scotten emphasizes that it’s important to make the move while still healthy enough to enjoy the activities. “often a person or couple waits until there is an event or an illness that prompts them into looking into the move. more often than not, this is too late,” she warns, as most ccrcs have physical and health qualifications for joining.

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the manor Village at preston The manor village life centers is a chain of independent living communities with supportive care, and the newest just held its grand opening in the fall. The manor village at Preston sits on nearly eight acres at the intersection of nW cary Parkway and chapel Hill road, and has 166 residential suites ranging in size from 848-square-foot, one-bedroom units to two-bedroom units up to 1278 square feet. The center caters to “seniors who have decided that taking care of their long-time home is just too much work and not worth the effort,” says Tom Stewart, certified club manager and administrator. “The children might feel that mom or Dad needs to enjoy these golden years and that the upkeep and maintenance requirements are just too much for all involved.” amenities include a dining area, garden café, convenience store, fitness rooms, fireside lounge, billiards room, beauty salon, arts and crafts rooms, movie theatre, library, computer lounge and concierge desk. The outside grounds were designed for elegance, with numerous walking paths surrounded by aesthetic elements such as a gazebo, fountains and other landscaping touches.

Services include transportation to shops and medical appointments; group trips to museums, parks and sporting events; and a full-time activities coordinator who leads fitness classes and

organizes special events, trips and clubs. Says Stewart, “We have a full dining room offering a la carte service seven days a week, with healthy and delicious meals prepared by chef guy Bross, formerly of the Umstead Hotel.”

Stewart stresses that retirement should mean giving up the grind of having to maintain an older home, and that anyone considering moving to a retirement community should visit different types of communities, assess their health needs and decide what kind of lifestyle they want to lead. While retirement used to equate to “nursing homes and places where people went to face the end,” Stewart maintains, “today the manor village is a cruise ship on land, allowing our seniors to live life to its fullest.” and living life to its fullest is what retirement should be all about.

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Another

Important Consideration in Retirement

As if moving weren’t enough to think about, it’s important for seniors to focus on a less pleasant aspect of the future – what will become of their estate. This is essential because it protects and provides for the retiree and their loved ones, says Jackie Bedard, attorney and counselor at law with Carolina Family Estate Planning in Cary. “First, you want to make sure you have a say in how you will be taken care of in the event of disability,” she says. “Second, in the event of death, estate planning will allow you to specify what you want to give, to whom you want to give it, the way that you want to give it and the amount of protection and control that you want the beneficiary to have.”

Bedard says an estate plan should include a will, health care powers of attorney, HIPAA authorizations, durable financial powers of attorney and possibly a living trust. “Your plan should include specific instructions about how you want to be cared for in the event of disability and who you want making your health care decisions and managing your financial affairs on your behalf,” she explains.

Some of the things to consider when creating an estate plan are: 4 A community’s equity refunds and how/ to whom they are paid.

4 Disability instructions and how they fit into the community’s policies.

4 What the community’s assisted living and nursing facilities are like.

4 Long-term care insurance planning and Medicaid pre-planning.

4 The best use of financial assets, and the order in which they should be depleted.

It’s also important to remember that “right now” is always a good time for estate planning – don’t wait until retirement, Bedard stresses! Lastly, she says, “Estate planning is also not just about your financial wealth, but your wisdom, dreams and the lessons and values you have learned over a lifetime – who you are and what’s important to you. Think about how you are going to pass on your stories, values and wishes to future generations.”

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shopping

S O U T H C A RY

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chef’s corner

recipes chef mario copy darcy brennan-huante Photography april maness photography

one bowl wonders

Cooked in one pot, served in one bowl so they’re loaded with flavor, without loading up your dishwasher!

The beginning of a new year is a time for reflection and most of us search for ways to simplify and get more out of our lives.

One big place to start is in your kitchen!

2010 is bringing a resurgence of home cooks and a desire to cook for our families, but we don’t have the amount of time to spend in the kitchen of generations past as most families rely on two incomes to keep the ball rolling. Let’s take a page from the book of our grandmothers and mothers and keep it simple with all-in-one-bowl meals! Cooked in one pot, served in one bowl for all the flavor, all the kudos and much less of the dishes so you have more time to do the things you love and desire doing, like helping your kids with a finger painting project or that jewelry box made of macaroni!

Great Northern Cassoulet 10-12 servings 1/2 lb bacon, diced 1 lb chicken breast, largely diced 1 lb pork loin, largely diced 1 lb turkey kielbasa sausage 3 cups onion, medium dice 3 cups celery, medium dice 3 cups carrot, medium dice 1 tsp garlic, minced

6 cups chicken stock 1 qt can diced tomatoes 1/3 cup brown sugar 1 tsp fresh thyme 1 Tbsp Dijon Salt and pepper 3 cans of great northern beans

Cook bacon in a large pot over medium high heat until crisp. Remove with slotted spoon and set aside in a paper towel-lined bowl. Pour off all bacon fat. Brown chicken breast, pork, and kielbasa separately in batches until golden and set aside with bacon. Add the onion, celery, carrot, and garlic to the pot and cook until softened 5-6 minutes. Return the bacon, chicken, pork, and kielbasa to the vegetables. Add the chicken stock, tomato, brown sugar, thyme, and Dijon. Bring to a boil. Season with salt and pepper. Simmer on low, stirring every 5 minutes or so until meat becomes tender (about 30 minutes). Add beans (don’t add them too early or they’ll turn to mushy paste) and simmer 10 minutes more. Add chicken stock if mixture seems dry (should have the consistency of Grandma’s gravy or a thick stew. Add too much, it will be more “soup-like”, add too little and it’s a thick hearty sop-it-up-with-a-roll meal, but either way, still yummy!). Serve in bowls with mashed potatoes, rice or all by itself. Enjoy!

(Chef’s overall tip: Cooking times will always vary because ovens and other factors will continually vary. Always keep an eye on what you have on the stove top or in the oven and have a thermometer and tasting spoon at the ready!)

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Spicy Turkey Bean Chili 8 servings

Chicken with Sausage and Capers 8 servings 4 tsp olive oil 1- 1/2 lbs skinless boneless chicken breasts cut into 1” pieces 1/2 lb hot Italian sausage,

cut into 1/2” slices 4 cups diced peppers 4 cups chopped red onion 1/2 cup chicken broth/stock

1 tsp minced garlic 1 tsp dried basil leaves 1 tsp dried oregano leaves 1 cups chicken broth/stock 4 Tbsp red wine vinegar 4 Tbsp capers, drained 5 cups canned crushed tomatoes 4 Tbsp grated Parmesan

In a large skillet, heat the oil. Add the chicken and sausage (let chicken and sausage sear well to caramelize the outside and get all that yummy flavor. Once you get a nice sear on one side, use your spatula to flip the meat and get a nice sear on the other side). Cook until browned and cooked through, 8-10 minutes. Remove from skillet; place in a half hotel pan or lasagna pan (about the size of a regular cookie sheet pan, but with high sides). Add peppers and onions to your skillet and sauté until tender, 4-5 minutes, stirring occasionally. Add 1/2 cup chicken stock to loosen bits from bottom of the pan (yes, these are yummy parts and where a lot of your flavor can get the left behind! This process is called “deglazing”). Add garlic and herbs and sauté for 2 minutes or so. Add 1 cup chicken stock and tomatoes and bring to a boil. Reduce heat and simmer for 8 minutes or so. Skim if necessary (skimming removes the fat that floats to the surface. The more you skim, the less fat ends up in your dish! Fair warning though – fat equals flavor, so don’t go overboard). Pour over chicken and sausage in lasagna/hotel pan and dust with Parmesan cheese. Place uncovered in a 350 degree oven and bake for 25 minutes.

1 Tbsp olive oil 1 lb ground skinless turkey breast 3 colored bell peppers,

seeded and diced 2 onions, chopped 6 garlic cloves, minced 1 Tbsp ground cumin 2 tsp dried oregano 1 Tbsp chili powder 1/2 tsp cayenne pepper 3 bay leaves 1 (28oz) can crushed tomatoes

(no salt added) 2 cups black beans, rinsed and drained 1 (15oz) can fat-free refried beans 1/2 cup diced green chilies In a large pot, heat oil. Add turkey, bell peppers, onions, garlic, cumin, oregano, cayenne, and bay leaves; cook, stirring as needed, until turkey is browned and the vegetables are softened, 6-8 minutes.

Add the tomatoes, beans, and chilies; bring to a boil. Reduce the heat and simmer, covered, stirring as needed, until the flavors are well blended, about 45 minutes. Discard the bay leaves. (If you’ve ever felt some items are actually BETTER the next day, you’re right!

Some items like chilis, soups, stews and most Italian dishes like having an extra day for the flavors to develop.)

Beef Stroganoff 8 servings 2 tsp vegetable oil 2 lb sirloin steaks, trimmed and cut

into 2”x 1/4” strips

(for best flavor, use skirt steak or sirloin,

but pre-cut stew beef will work) 4 cups sliced mushrooms 4 cups onions, chopped 2 tsp garlic, minced

2 Tbsp all purpose flour 6 cups chicken broth 2 Tbsp Worcestershire sauce 1/4 cup minced parsley 1/2 cup sour cream 8 cups cooked egg noodles

In a large, deep pot (with sides), heat the oil. Add the beef and cook, turning as needed, until all liquid has extracted and reduced to nothing (beef should be brown and crisp on all sides) about 20 minutes. Transfer to a bowl. In the same deep pot, add the mushrooms, onions, and garlic and sauté until tender, about 4-5 minutes, stirring occasionally. Add 1/2 cup chicken stock to loosen bits from bottom of the pot. Let liquid reduce.

Sprinkle flour over the vegetable mixture and cook, stirring constantly, until the flour is lightly browned, about 1 minute. Return the beef to the pot and add chicken stock and Worcestershire sauce; bring to a boil. Reduce the heat and simmer, skim as needed. Place in a 350 degree oven, uncovered, for about 45 minutes total. (Be sure to check cooking progress every 20 minutes or so as this process “reduces” your mixture, meaning the water will evaporate out, leaving the flavor behind. Add chicken stock if mixture seems too dry. It should still look juicy and delicious!) Remove from the oven and let cool about 20 minutes. Stir in the sour cream. Place noodles in serving bowls and top with stroganoff.

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DAPPER DESIGN � Known as the Southern gentleman on TLC’s Trading Spaces, Edward Walker calls the Triangle home.

by CHRISTA GALA

TLC’s Trading Spaces pushed Edward Walker as an interior designer.

“I couldn’t do the same design ideas over and over,” says Walker, who spent five seasons on the hit show that ended in 2008. “I was able to try a lot of different looks, not just stick with the traditional.”

Trading Spaces had an interesting premise: neighbors swapped houses for two days to “makeover” a room in the other’s house with the help of a designer and a $1,000 budget. Fans loved seeing the end result and getting to know the designers themselves. Walker, who grew up in

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© Day Meets Night photography © Jo sh N o r r is

Bedding from Edward Walker’s signature line for teens and tweens – available at Cuddlebugs-N-Cocoons in Apex.

Whiteville, nc, became known as the Southern gentleman with a dapper and elegant style.

The show taught him, quickly, how to assess a room and figure out both the problems and challenges and then come up with a design plan. “it really solidified to me how to approach a room,” Walker says.

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© Day Meets Night Photography

�

a full plate Walker has had a home in the Triangle since 1997 when he moved from New York City to start a custom wedding dress business. He’s been here full-time since 2008.

When Cary Living caught up with him, he was in the throes of designing costumes for the live nativity program at New Hope Baptist Church, along with a string of other projects.

For starters, he’s founder of Edward Walker Designs. He does some private client work, but Walker’s goal is to do more commercial design, including corporate interiors, hotels and restaurants. He also licenses a bedding line for teens and tweens, available locally at Cuddlebugs-N-Cocoons in Apex, and he hopes to re-launch his pillow collection, Edward Walker Graphics.

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The line almost launched last summer. “The embroidery was pretty, but the quality of the fabrics they were using was not up to my standards,” he says. “That was tough, but i really do stand by my work. if it’s not going to be quality at a fair price, then i don’t want to show it or use it.” although Walker’s got a lot on his professional plate, a personal goal of his is to work with middle and high school students who are interested in design but don’t know much about the industry as a profession. He spoke recently to a local 4-H club about the topic.

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© Day Meets Night Photography

Walker named this bedding set the Sylvia Ann, after his mom.

�

What’s your design dilemma?

When Trading Spaces was cancelled, it was bittersweet for Walker. “I definitely was disappointed because I loved doing the show,” Walker says. “I loved what it stood for and what we were trying to accomplish. But it was time.”

Nationwide, there’s still plenty of interest in decorating on a budget, and the Triangle is no exception. Walker agreed to give Cary Living readers a few tips about some common design dilemmas.

1. The missing focal point:

We all have a room like this one – bland and with no defining features. If there’s no focal point, Walker says, make one. Structural attributes, like a fireplace or bay window, can be focal points, but you can also create your own. Consider hanging a collection on the wall—be it artwork or something else. “Grouping a collection of artwork as opposed to spreading it around the room is a great focal point,” Walker says. If you have a large piece of furniture, that will work too.

2. Making a small room look larger:

“Use larger scale furniture.” As surprising as it sounds,Walker says a large-scale piece will make a small room seem larger. Try a large piece of artwork. “It doesn’t take up a lot of depth in the room, but it gives you big impact visually.” Also, design “up” with floor-to-ceiling bookshelves, which add height. “People think too horizontally as opposed to vertically,” says Walker.

3. The skinny room:

Does your living room look like a bowling alley? “Instead of decorating the entire long, narrow room, arrange it in zones,” Walker says, noting, too, that the furniture shouldn’t be against the walls. “You can establish those zones with an area rug, a grouping of furniture as a conversation area, an entertainment area for playing cards, a reading nook or a TV-watching area.”

4. Giving old items new life: The best fix could be the cheapest. Move stuff around. Just because a piece was originally designed for one room doesn’t mean it has to stay there. Walker takes his own advice. He recently moved his grandmother’s breakfront, part of the dining room set, into his guest bedroom. “I didn’t have space for it in the dining room,” he says. “I filled it with books and items that would go into a guest room to make a library of sorts. I’m always thinking of moving things around. Why does a buffet with all the drawers have to be just a buffet for china? Why couldn’t it be for clothes or books in another room?”

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� Tips for any room

shopping

southern WAK E

De-clutter:

�

It’s one of the simplest room re-dos there is. “Edit what’s in there,” says Walker. “Get rid of all the little chotsky stuff that has accumulated in there and maybe buy some new pillows for the sofa,” he says, noting that having too much stuff is quite possibly the biggest design mistake people make.

Paint last:

With paint, you get a lot of bang for the buck, there’s no doubt about that – but there are a few things you should know before you start collecting color swatches, says Walker. First, paint last. That’s right; wait until the very end of your project to paint. “I always start with my fabrics first because that’s what I can’t change,” says Walker. In other words, it’s a lot easier to match paint to fabric than the other way around.

Light and bright is best: Nonsense, says Walker. “I love to paint [small rooms] in deep, rich colors and make them look like Faberge egg jewelry boxes,” says Walker. “Just because the size of the room is small doesn’t mean you’re limited with color.

Color is such a personal preference. I really encourage everyone to use the colors that work for them.”

But what are the latest color trends? “A lot of designers are moving away from the brown tones and moving into the grays – steel gray and pewter and white and silver together with some gold accents. There have been some beautiful combinations of grey and gold.” Metallic hues are still very popular and are often used together with stunning results.

If you don’t favor those colors, sit tight. “It will pendulum back,” says Walker.

Go for it: According to Walker, there are no major design rules these days. “The design edicts have disappeared,” he says.

While that signals freedom for some, for others it simply makes things harder. Walker’s not buying it.

“Get out there and try it,” he says. “It doesn’t have to cost an arm and a leg to redecorate a room.” And, he points out, if you don’t like what you did, you can always change it back.

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shopping

SALEM STREET

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calendar

OF EVENTS

J AN U AR Y | F E B R U AR Y 2 0 1 0

1/8 - A rt After Dark 2nd Fri day. 6pm-8pm. Art walk in Holly

1/15 – 1/17 – Tip th e Scales in Your Favor. Duke Integrative

Springs & Fuquay-Varina, various locations.

Free. Details 919-387-9448, www.TheNatureOfArtFrameShop.com.

Medicine. Join us for a unique and exciting three-day weight loss program led by experts in the field of Integrative Medicine. $295.

Call 866-313-0959 to register.

1/8 - Opening Art Reception.

6pm-8pm. Oil paintings by Rocky Alexander. Show through January 31st. The Nature of Art, Sunset Lake Commons, 5229 Sunset Lake Rd, Holly Springs. 919-387-9448, www.TheNatureOfArtFrameShop.com.

1/9 – Second Empire Gran dprix series: Run for young.

10am. 120 East Edenton St, Raleigh. www.secondempireraceraleigh.com.

1/9 – Carol Stein’s Gar den Forum. 11am. Attracting bluebirds.

Free, but registration is requested. The Garden Hut, 1004 Old Honeycutt Rd, FuquayVarina. 919-552-0590, www.NelsasGardenHut.com.

1/16 - Ch ine se Brush Paint ing. 1:15pm-3pm. $30. Preregistration required. The Nature of Art, Sunset Lake Commons, 5229 Sunset Lake Rd, Holly Springs. 919-387-9448, www.TheNatureOfArtFrameShop.com.

1/17 – Open Hou se. 2pm-4pm.

The New School Montessori Center, 5617 Sunset Lake Rd, Holly Springs.

919-303-3636.

1/17 – Raleigh Drum C ircle.

7pm-8:30pm. Rain or shine. No experience is necessary. Loaner drums are available; facilitated by Greg Whitt. Lake Johnson Park at the Boat House, 4601 Avent Ferry Rd, Raleigh. $5 admission per person or $10 per family. For more information, call the park at 919-233-2121 or visit www.raleighdrumcircle.org.

1/17 – Bri des and Brunc h.

11am-1pm. You have the groom and the ring, now it’s time to plan the big event.

Area vendors provide information for planning your wedding. Light brunch served.

Register to win gift certificates from area wedding vendors. Free, but RSVP required.

The Paper Company, 5273 Sunset Lake Rd, Holly Springs. 919-303-9431.

1/17 – Ch ild and Infant CPR and P ediatric First A id.

2pm. Space is extremely limited. $40 CPR only. $60 CPR and First Aid. The Diapering Doula by The Triangle Diaper Company, 4109 Grace Park Dr, Morrisville. For more information call Karissa at 919-961-9885.

1/23 - Watercolor Batik Painting. 1pm-3pm. $30 + $5 materials fee. The Nature of Art, Sunset Lake Commons, 5229 Sunset Lake Rd, Holly Springs. 919-387-9448, www.TheNatureOfArtFrameShop.com.

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1/30 – La Boutique for Kids Fashion Show. 10am-1pm. Show will be held at My Gym, 1040 Darrington Dr, Cary. www.LaBoutiqueforKids.com; 919-749-5368.

1/30 - T riangle’s largest Chinese New Year Festival.

Enjoy eight hours of music, dance, and cultural performances on stage; authentic Chinese snacks and meals for purchase, kids activities, and cultural exhibits. Expo Center, NC State Fairgrounds. Purchase tickets at www.nctacas.org or at the door.

Kids six and under are free. 919-625-1207.

1/31 – Opening Art Recep tion. 2pm-4pm. 2010 Meredith College Alumnae Art Exhibition. Over 65 alumnae representing each decade since 1946 are represented. Featuring ceramics, paintings, mixed media, sculpture, textiles, photography, drawings and other media in this retrospective look at the Meredith College Art Department. 1/31 – 4/4 in Rotunda Gallery, Meredith College, 3800 Hillsborough St, Raleigh.

919-760-8374, www.meredith.edu.

2/4-2/6 – triangle wine event. Wine Makers Dinner and Grand Gala with fine wine auction.

All proceeds go to the Frankie Lemmon Foundation. 919.845.8880. www.trianglewineexperience.org.

2/4 – 2/7; 3/8 – 3/21 – Mindfulness Training for Professionals. Harnessing the Mind/Body Connection to Optimize the Health and Well-Being of Those You Serve. An eight-day training in two parts.

Duke Integrative Medicine. $1995.

Call 866-313-0959 to register.

2/7 – Secon d Empire Grandprix serie s: Run for t h e roses 5k. 2pm. 1015 Halifax Street, Raleigh. www.secondempireraceraleigh.com.

2/12 - Art After Dark 2 nd Fri day. 6pm-8pm. Art walk in Holly Springs & Fuquay-Varina, various locations.

Free. Details 919-387-9448, www.TheNatureOfArtFrameShop.com.

2/12 – Stay Awh ile for L ove and St yle. 5pm-7pm. Meet our new group of talented stylists. Stylists will be available to offer complimentary color and style consultations on-site to all of our attendees. Wine and cheese served. Gel Salon, 1061 Darrington Dr, Cary. 919-297-0111. www.gelsaloninc.com.

2/13 – Pruning Demon stra tion. 11am. Pruning demonstration by owner and horticulturist Nelsa Cox. Free, but pre-registration is requested. The Garden Hut, 1004 Old Honeycutt Rd, FuquayVarina. 919-552-0590, www.NelsasGardenHut.com.

2/16 – Fat Tuesday Benefit for Meals On W heels. 6pm.

Join Meals on Wheels supporters for the Triangle’s premiere Mardi Gras event – an evening of fun that you won’t want to miss. Raleigh Convention Center.

Call 919.833.1749 or e-mail lindad@wakemow.org.

2/20 - Ch ine se Brush Paint ing. 1:15pm-3pm. $30. Preregistration required. The Nature of Art, Sunset Lake Commons, 5229 Sunset Lake Rd, Holly Springs. 919-387-9448, www.TheNatureOfArtFrameShop.com.

2/20 – Secon d Empire Grand-prix series: 5K Benefitting Special Olympics.

9am. 2400 Campus Shore Dr, Raleigh. www.secondempireraceraleigh.com.

2/20 - TH E NATURE OF ART Birthday Part y.

1pm-3pm. Celebrating 30 years in business.

Cake & pictures. Free. The Nature of Art, Sunset Lake Commons, 5229 Sunset Lake Rd, Holly Springs. 919-387-9448, www.TheNatureOfArtFrameShop.com.

2/21 – Open Hou se. 2pm-4pm.

The New School Montessori Center, 5617 Sunset Lake Rd, Holly Springs.

919-303-3636.

S e n d u s you r e v e n t s Community events you would like published in the calendar can be emailed to myra@caryliving.com.

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shopping

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ASHWORTH DRUGS 1 0 5 W. C H AT H A M S T R E E T, C A R Y N C 2 7 5 1 1 P H O N E 4 6 7 - 1 8 7 7

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919.467.1877 MONDAY-FRIDAY 9AM-6PM/SATURDAY 9AM-5PM 32 | caryliving.com

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Valentine’ s Splurges UNDER $100

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3

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1. PURE PASSION. Make every day Valentine’s Day for the one you love with this symbolic bracelet. She’ll remember each special moment every time she wears it. Beads start at $23. Swagger Gifts.

2. THE ULTIMATE VALENTINE EXPERIENCE! Three spa services to indulge the love of your life.

Papillion’s Ultimate Experience – $100. I Love You Package – $75. Chocolate Lover’s Delight – $60.

Papillion Salon and Spa. 3. VALENTINE PHOTOGRAPHY SESSION BY APRIL MANESS PHOTOGRAPHY. Capture the loved ones in your life for memories that last a lifetime. $39. April Maness Photography.

4. THE JANE MARVEL “CARRY-ALL” BAG. It’s roomier than it seems. Great for work and play.

Comes in 14 different patterns. You won’t be able to choose just one. $82. Cute Buttons Gift and Paper Boutique.

7. LIQUID SMILE™, the first and only professional whitening pen, offers consumers convenient and affordable teeth whitening. Liquid Smile is easy to apply and fits into your evening routine of brushing before bedtime. $99. Carolina Medi Spa.

5. CUSTOMIZED EMBOSSER for stationery, etc. $59.95 + shipping. The Paper Company.

8. PICNIC BY THE FIRE IN FEBRUARY. Lolita Wine Glasses (Big Hearted Lover or Wild Thing), $24 each. Monogrammed Picnic Basket, $36.99.

6. UNCOMMONLY CHIC. Jewelry made from sterling silver and freshwater pearls. Necklace, $34. Earrings, $36. Blue Tiger.

Carolina Silver.

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Wedding Tip-In.indd 1

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WELCOME

2010 western wake

bridal guide

By Kate Turgeon Photos timeless photography

If you’re engaged or know that a proposal is on its way, congrats! While happiness abounds, it may feel like decisions abound, too. There are seemingly endless choices about gown color, invitation fonts, favors, bouquets, napkins, jewelry and more. Right down to the flavor of the icing on your wedding cake, there are decisions to be made.

But it’s your big day, so the choices are yours.

And the 2010 Cary Living Bridal Guide is here to make planning easy. We’ve talked to area experts for tips on planning the event that’s right for you, and we’re catering to your questions about invitations, photography, jewelry, receptions, flowers and attire.

Brooke Dillard understands how planning a wedding can leave a bride-to-be swamped in details.

For Dillard, hiring wedding specialist Caroline Shipman was one way to help alleviate stresses associated with event planning. “It allowed us to relax and actually enjoy our season of engagement,” says Dillard. “She kept us on track throughout the planning process and introduced us to many great vendors.”

After five years in the industry, Shipman knows that every event has its challenges. So she encourages all brides to take a step back if they reach their breaking

points. “I tell my brides…think about the wonderful man you are committing your future to, and think of all the reasons that led you to say ‘yes.’”

And while you’re committing yourself to your future spouse, it’s also a good idea to commit yourself to enjoying the process of planning your big day, Shipman adds. “The greatest tragedy to me is when brides choose perfection over enjoyment. Take the challenging moments in stride and remember to relax and enjoy this exciting time,” she says.

Let the enjoyment begin with a look at engagement rings!

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THE RING

more than

bling

Jeweler Ron Lodholz loves a good love story. “We had one young man who knew his girlfriend was going antique shopping at the coast…without her knowing, he went to the coast early and left a surprise gift at every store she would be visiting [with the help of a friend]…the last gift led her to a pier where he was waiting on a sailboat with dinner and the ring,” says Lodholz, owner and creative director at Stonehaven Jewelry Gallery in Cary’s Stonecreek Village.

Lodholz loves his place inside the love story, too.

In fact, when a new customer is looking for the perfect engagement ring, Lodholz begins by asking him to talk about the woman the ring is for. “It’s always great to see his eyes light up,” he says. “As crazy as it sounds, I have to remember that this is never about the ring. It is about love…commitment…romance.”

After discussions about the bride’s personality and style, as well as what the man hopes the ring will say, Lodholz can start designing the perfect engagement ring to express these things.

According to The Knot, men should keep a few things in mind before venturing out to purchase an engagement ring.

The shape of the diamond is top priority, so make sure he knows if you prefer a round to an oval, or an asscher to a princess cut. Settings are important, too, as the right combination of setting and diamond shape makes a big difference.

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“Shop around... education is truly the best tool a diamond shopper can have.”

-Barak Henis, Diamonds Direct Crabtree

Richard Schwartz didn’t rush his quest for the right engagement ring. He visited at least five jewelry stores over several months before deciding on Diamonds Direct Crabtree, where he says he found a comfortable, low-pressure environment in which to shop.

“They want you to know as much as possible about what you’re looking at and what you’re buying,” says Schwartz. “And the follow-up service is incredible.”

Initially, Schwartz shopped with his girlfriend (who is now his wife) to get an understanding of what she liked. It’s a trend more and more guys seem to be following according to Diamonds Direct vice president Barak Henis. “The surprise now is not ‘if’ they’ll get engaged, but when and where,” he says.

Another trend in engagement rings is the cushion-cut diamond because most of the carat weight is in the surface of the stone and that gives a big look for the price, says Henis. Tension mount settings are popular, too, especially for the bride seeking a more modern look. “[And] antique style rings are still gaining a lot of attention, but lately brides have been adding mismatched bands to give the ring a personal touch,” he says.

Above all, Henis believes education is key for anyone in the market for an engagement ring. “My best advice to couples searching for that perfect diamond is to educate themselves and to shop around…education is truly the best tool a diamond shopper can have,” he says.

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pining for the

LOCATION

party

Cutting the cake, tossing the bouquet and dancing the first dance - there are plenty of reasons to love the wedding reception.

But preparing for the merriment of your family members and friends can turn any blushing bride-to-be into a ball of stress.

Choosing the venue, staff and equipment that best suits your needs, style and budget is a huge, and important, decision for any couple. “This aspect is so important that it can make or break a happy wedding,” says Diane Blalock, co-owner of The Nathan Blalock House: A Wedding Place in Raleigh. “The best advice I can give is to plan ahead.”

Historic venues, such as her 1910 Classical Revival-style house, are popular among brides seeking a certain charm and intimate setting for their weddings. But make sure what you’re getting is more than just a beautiful spot, says Blalock. “It’s also important that the host of the venue is easy to work with and organized, and that everything that has been promised to you happens. You have to really trust the host,” she says. “You are not just paying for a venue, you are paying for a wedding.”

Talking to friends, contacting a host’s references and doing other research can help you find a place that will deliver on its promises. Mary Rachel White, facilities coordinator for One

Eleven Place in Cary, suggests brides take time to imagine what’s most important to them.

“From there, you may be able to sacrifice part of your budget on other things once you are able to achieve the elements that are the most important to you,” says White. For example, if the meal is most important to you, allocate a substantial part of your budget toward it and see what other areas (such as party favors) that you can pinch from to make the meal as impressive as possible.

As with all other aspects of your wedding, you’ll want to have a firm understanding of exactly what’s included in the price.

For example, at One Eleven Place couples book the facility (the grand ballroom can hold 100-300 people) and equipment (such as chairs and tables), but the next step is to choose a caterer. The bride then works with the caterer on menu, rentals (table linens, flatware, plates and glasses) and layout. One Eleven Place offers extras at additional costs, such as on-site audiovisual equipment and a dance floor. Again, items like these can add up, so setting a plan is important.

“Have a budget…and be disciplined about it,” says John Hylwa, co-owner of Capital Events, a full-service party rental store in Cary. “It’s easier to work with someone if we know how much they have to spend.”

If you’re watching every penny, Hylwa suggests reserving a tent to act as the anchor of your event. “Having a reception under a tent is an elegant and cost-effective way to host a reception,” he says. Like almost everyone in the wedding industry, he recommends planning – and booking – ahead.

If you’re having an outdoor wedding, it’s a good idea to have a tent just in case of rain. Some brides put off reserving it (after all, no one likes to think of rain on her big day), but that can create problems, especially for events in May, June and October, months that are especially busy for the rental industry. “It may be too late, and either you can’t find one or you are going to pay the price,” says Hylwa.

Of course, tents and chairs come to mind when most people think of event rentals. However, many stores, such as Capital Events, also have chocolate fountains, columns, lighting, china and stages for bands. For more formal events, there are plenty of upgrades like chandeliers for tents, silk tablecloths and Chiavari chairs.

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And now on to the reason you need all the tables and chairs – food. For many people (most of them guests!) the food is one of the most important aspects of the big day.

Darcy Brennan-Huante, general manager of Chef Mario’s, understands how vital food and its presentation are to a wedding reception. It’s one reason she recommends buffet service for most catered weddings. For starters, it’s more affordable than a plated meal (because of staffing costs).

And a buffet also adds a display quality and casual warmth to a function, says Brennan-Huante. (But if your wedding is held at a hotel where plating is standard practice, that may be a different circumstance because all china and staff are already on-site, she adds.)

Brennan-Huante suggests that couples do their homework and find a caterer who is well liked, experienced and organized. “Our job is to make the day worry-free for our couple…and to make sure that every bride who comes across our books gets more than she expected,” says BrennanHuante.

To help clients realize their vision, Chef Mario’s has an extensive questionnaire for the bride and groom to complete during the initial planning stages. “When they are done filling it out, many have said their vision starts to solidify, whereas before they felt overwhelmed and uncoordinated.”

To help banish that overwhelmed feeling, it’s also important to know what common reception pitfalls are out there so that you can avoid them. Frequent mistakes include not renting the facility for long enough to accommodate for the “break-down” of the event and forgetting cake plates and forks. “You’d be surprised how often that gets overlooked,” says Brennan-Huante, who also encourages couples to have back-ups for specialty items that may not arrive in time. For example, keep some plain napkins on hand just in case your printer doesn’t deliver on the personalized napkins.

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invitations

perf

Long before your guests open your wedding program, they’ll be running a letter opener across the top of a specially addressed envelope. Of course, you wish for invitations to offer the proper information (such as setting, date and time), but you also want the cards to pop with your personality and set the tone for your big day.

When Elissa McCallum (now Elissa Rushton) set out to choose her wedding invitations at Cary’s Cute Buttons, she knew one thing: they had to be simple, yet elegant. And after two visits to the shop, she chose ivory invitations with a pearl border and cursive font. Interestingly enough, they were the first invitations she liked.

“Go with your gut feeling,” says Rushton, who recommends finding a stationery shop where a professional will listen intently and follow your lead with regard to style, timeline and budget.

“Invitation shopping is fun, but it can be overwhelming,” says Alison Kim Perry, Cute Buttons’ owner. “We ask our customers to come in with a few things in mind – What type of style do they like? Maybe engraved? How about letterpress?” Perry also suggests that customers have an idea of how many invitations are needed and what their budgets are.

By using a principle of threes, Perry helps customers navigate the selection process. “We have the bride narrow it down to no more than three. Any number higher than that proves too daunting,” says Perry. “[Then] we go through each style carefully.

Sometimes we do this in one visit, but most times the final decision is made during the second visit.”

Perry also encourages her clients to find – and follow – their own style. “Old rules…no longer apply,” she says. “Modern and contemporary styles don’t translate into inappropriateness any more than keeping with traditional means you are too old.

Find a style that fits you.”

In addition to knowing your personal style, it’s also important to know your wedding. Is it formal or more on the casual side? Do you have a theme, or a color scheme? Amy Grace of InvitationBox.com in

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erfectl Cary encourages her customers to carefully examine questions like these.

“We also strongly suggest that our customers purchase samples of their top choices to help them make a more educated decision regarding paper quality, design and texture,” says Grace. This hold-andcompare test can help a bride arrive at the best choice for her event.

But choosing the invite is just the beginning. Grace says brides should pay special attention to the wording of their invitations.

Keeping proper etiquette, she adds, is a must.

“A wedding invitation is the first indication of your wedding…this makes it all the more important to have everything written, spelled and tensed correctly,” says Grace.

If minding details and personal style are a bride’s best friends when it comes to

timed and trimmed

invitations, the proverbial last-minute may be her worst enemy.

That’s right, ladies, time to spare isn’t as glamorous as your up-do, but it’s just as important. “Allow ample time to complete the process,” says Lori Burns, owner of the Paper Company in Holly Springs. “We request at least five weeks turn-around time on custom invitation orders…that allows for proofing…printing and assembly.”

Staying ahead of your event can be tedious, but it’s worth it. Just ask Cary’s Nancy Adams, who ordered her custom invitations from The Paper Company. “I have to tell you, people got the invitations in the mail…and Steve and I actually got phone calls about them. The feedback was crazy,” she says.

Her invites, which were done in bronze, chocolate brown and orange cream were

quintessentially autumn, right down to the layered paper and one-of-a-kind seals. “The invitations were exactly what I envisioned,” says Adams. “Quality card stock…nice paper…it’s really important to me. I value that.”

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best dressed

wedding DAy look

Are you ready for what may be the biggest shopping trip of your life? It’s time to find a wedding gown! Like all the other wedding decisions, this one should be fun and enjoyable.

And just like any successful shopping trip, you’ll want to be careful about who goes along for the ride. “Too many opinions can make your experience unpleasant and sometimes disastrous,” says Liz Pogue, owner of Gorgeous Gowns and Wedding Dresses in Cary’s Village Square. “Choosing a select few to shop with – whose opinions you value – works best.”

So, now that your gal pals with good taste are ready to shop, it’s time to hit the fitting rooms. By now you have likely pored over bridal magazines and have some ideas of what you like. It’s important to remember, however, not to limit yourself to one or two

certain styles. An open mind will go far, says Pogue, whose boutique sells new and gently used wedding gowns.

Holly Springs resident Tanisha Walker chose a wedding gown she didn’t set out to buy. “But when I saw it I thought it had the most interesting and unique design: The top was strapless and corseted with a sheer, beaded overlay of fabric. The bottom of the dress was very full because the fabric was gathered,” says Walker, who was married in July. “It reminded me of a cloud moving when I walked in it.”

And she was on that proverbial “cloud nine” when she found the dress at Gorgeous Gowns after four months of shopping at about five other stores. The waiting, she says, was worth it and Walker encourages other brides to take their time and sleep on it, just like any other major decision.

She also suggests toting a camera along on shopping trips so someone can snap a few photos of the bride-to-be wearing prospective gowns. “Sometimes things look great in the mirror, but the pictures can tell a different story,” says Walker. “A picture is worth a thousand words.”

And if you’re hoping for pretty pictures, wedding experts have plenty of advice on dressing for your body type. To start, an Aline gown (with a fitted bodice with a skirt that comes straight out from the waist) looks good on almost every body type. And sashes are almost always flattering, too. Busty brides with a short waist often choose v-neck styles; tall and thin women often enjoy a straight or mermaid-style gown. And if you’re petite with narrow shoulders, a strapless-style gown is likely to look great on you.

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FLOWERS

bouquets

beautiful

If you’re stumped about flowers, inspiration is closer than you may think. Just ask Cydney Davis-English, who often directs undecided clients to their own homes. “Brides should embrace colors that they are comfortable with on a daily basis,” says Davis-English, owner of The English Garden in Raleigh. While you’re looking at bridal magazines, take time to also examine your clothes, window treatments and couch pillows.

Megan Palmer followed this advice for her October wedding. “Find pictures of what you love and share them with your florist,” suggests Palmer. “It helps them understand what your tastes and ideas are.”

Palmer, who used The English Garden for flowers from her cake to bridal bouquet, recommends finding a florist that you “click” with.

But maybe you’re thinking of not using a florist? If so, weigh your options beforehand. Arranging flowers yourself may seem like a good idea at the onset, but could prove to be troublesome. “A few dollars saved on candles or bulk flowers online may quickly vanish when the wedding day rolls around and the bridal couple and their families have to focus on putting together bouquets and centerpieces instead of enjoying the wedding,” says Davis-English.

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capture

PHotography

Talk to almost any bride and she’ll tell you that she planned for a year, and the wedding day seemed to pass in the blink of an eye. That’s what photography is for: making the blink of an eye last so moments can be shared and relived.

“It’s the one thing you’ll have to hold on to long after the wedding day has passed,” says Wanda Clayton of Timeless Photography.

For this reason, Clayton encourages brides to plan so that their budgets allow for the most professional photography they can afford.

For Clayton, who works with her daughter Christie Parrish, becoming a part of the wedding story is its own challenge and reward.

“One of our brides, Tobi Hamilton…she and her mother were so close and her mother was having a hard time ‘letting go,’” says Clayton.

So, they took a photograph of the bride resting her head in her mother’s lap while the mother was looking out the window. “It was priceless,” recalls Clayton. “And to be able to capture moments like this, that’s priceless, too.”

the

rapture

If you’re searching for a photographer to capture your priceless moments, here are some things to remember: • Get some names. Talking to friends, family members and co-workers can be a good way to start making a list of potential wedding photographers. And scour local magazines for images you like. Develop a short list of photographers you’d like to meet.

• Schedule a bridal consult to meet the photographer.

This will help you judge how comfortable you feel around this person. Remember, a photographer is practically your shadow on the big day, so choose someone you like.

• Review the photographer’s work. Taking time to look through albums of previous weddings is one of the best ways to know if a photographer’s style is what you envision for your wedding photographs.

• Communicate with potential photographers. If you have an idea about the types of images you’re hoping for, share that with her. Open a dialogue about what you like best, and see how she responds.

• Get the specifics about cost and what the cost covers.

For example, how many hours will the photographer be working? Does she work alone, or have a team? How long does it take before proofs are ready? Are any prints included in the photography fee?

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wedding planner or directo

tips for hiring a tips

Most brides started planning their wedding day at about age seven or eight when they attended their first wedding. You think you know exactly what you want until the ring is on your finger and you realize the mountain of choices you will be asked to make. Colors, tablecloths, band or DJ, roses or orchids…the list goes on and on. The easiest decision – to hire a wedding planner – but how do you choose the right planner? We asked Chantel Smith, owner of Events in a Box, what qualities to look for when hiring a wedding planner.

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Make sure the planner you hire can deliver on her promises and doesn’t set unrealistic goals.

Trustworthiness. Make sure her taste is similar to yours or that she understands your desires – you need to be able to trust her judgment.

If you are a contemporary bride, it is probably not within your best interest to hire a planner that is a traditionalist.

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Experience verses reputation. It is great to have a planner with experience, but it is even better to work with one with a positive reputation. Ask other vendors who they have enjoyed working with and who they would be willing to work with again.

You need a planner who works well with others.

This includes vendors, family, and friends.

Make sure your planner is your champion. She needs to fight for you.

You will have people telling you what you should and should not do and it is important to have a planner who supports your decisions.

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engaged, utraged, BAIn’s Beat

UPSTAGED Advice for the Groom-to-Be

Face it, guys – as a gender, we’re skeptical about marriage. I’m not sure why, because it’s a wonderful institution – the one where I had myself committed 17 years ago.

But before the bliss comes the blitz – three to eighteen months of panic, otherwise known as being engaged. You’ll fight constantly over insignificant details. Think of it as trial by ire. It starts with the diamond, the perfect analogy for marriage – precious, unbreakable and formed only after a long period of intense pressure.

Buying the ring is your most important responsibility. In fact, it’s your only responsibility, so man up and accept it. Letting her choose her ring is akin to admitting you’ll never be able to please her – something that otherwise should take you years to accept.

Diamond size is measured in “points” so women can keep score.

Nobody would ever say, “Beautiful gown; what’s the size?” but it’s perfectly acceptable to ask how big of a rock you bought.

They say a ring should cost two months’ salary. This is a myth, started by the people who sell diamonds and the people who wear them. Be strong; don’t let her be as shallow as your diamond. Practice this line: “It’s petite and beautiful, just like you.”

Beyond the ring, she gets her way. Be there for planning, but stay out of the way. When she asks your opinion, she just wants to validate hers. Under no circumstances should you offer an actual opinion. You must pretend to care enough to consider the question, but ultimately agree with her.

There’s a look for times like this – when she asks what you think, use it. Imagine you’re watching the big game on a television just past her shoulder. Watch intently, as if it’s showing a slow-motion replay, then visualize the call going your way. Look at her and say, “Yes! It’s good!”

Religion is another area where compromise is essential. If you were raised in different faiths, you’ll need to find a denomination that suits you both. Also, it should have a church nearby that’s photogenic enough for her wedding album.

We chose Episcopalianism, an effective mix of our religious backgrounds. One night we invited the priest to dinner after premarital counseling, and he ordered a beer with his chili. My fiancee had been raised Baptist, so she was shocked to see a minister drinking.

I’d been raised Catholic, so I was shocked to see him stop at only one.

We adapted eventually.

Some couples write their vows. If she hasn’t heard of this, keep it to yourself! But if she wants to try it, go along with the concept.

Just don’t attempt to write your half, especially if you want to avoid offending her, her parents, the officiant and the guests. Instead, shell out the money to have it secretly written by a freelancer. Trust me. I’m a freelancer.

You’ll be expected to attend bridal shows. Wear a nice shirt, practice your smile and hold your complaints for the six-hour duration. Or just move to where her maid of honor lives, so she can take your place at these events. It’s worth the expense.

You can also buy bridal magazines for ideas. There are several that, inexplicably, publish new issues monthly. Each looks like the previous; buy it anyway. She knows the difference and wants them all.

If you’re engaged less than a year, maybe you won’t have to subscribe.

She’ll grow her hair out, which you’ll like. Don’t get used to it.

She’ll butcher it within months, as it’s for photos only – kinda like Glamour Shots.

Remember favor bags at birthday parties when you were a kid?

Some couples give them at weddings. Seriously. If she suggests this, don’t laugh – it’s not a joke.

Bridal showers are no longer for women only. If you get invited to a “couples shower,” don’t get too excited – it’s not nearly as fun as the name implies.

There will be other minor details such as invitations, flowers and the reception. You don’t pay for those, so repeat her mother’s opinions. They agree on everything, anyway.

Cold feet? Don’t worry. There’s a simple test to determine whether you’re right for each other. If you get through the engagement without killing each other, you are.

Trust me. I’m a freelancer.

DAN BAIN, MARRED MAN mail@dan-bain.com

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9. an exQUisite gift for the person who prefers the finer things in life. These beautifully embossed papers are ideal for writing thank you notes. 50 letter sheets, 50 foldover notes and 50 enclosures with 150 matching envelopes. $51. www.Invitationbox.com.

10. a signatUre faCial and 30-minute treatment on the revolutionary inch-loss machine Ion Magnum. $100. Eminence Day Spa. 11. the aPPle of MY eYe. Treat the “apple of your eye� to this fun, simple floral design featuring vivid red tulips. Designed in a compact style perfect for a desktop or table at your favorite restaurant. $25. English Garden.

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12. Chocolate lover’s Breakfast Delight. This basket is full of delicious chocolate treats! Enjoy the pleasures of both white and dark chocolate. White chocolate cherry swirl bread, chocolate teacake bread and marvelous morning muffins made with rich dark cocoa. Paired with a dark roast of Larry’s Bean’s Organic coffee. $40 basket. Great Harvest Bread Company.

14. Maximillians Pizza Kitchen.

Dinner for two. One appetizer, two pizzas/two entrees, two desserts and a bottle of house wine (red or white) - $50/$75. Maximillians Pizza Kitchen.

13. FOREVER FRESH arrangement of golden tulips, red poppies, terra cotta ranunculus, hydrangea, purple thistle, blush gerbera daisies, variegated ivy and red berries makes this a gift to be enjoyed for many years. $89.50. Floral Accents & Interiors.

16. Kit heath. Sterling Silver Chalcedony. $85. Stonehaven.

15. DEEP CONDITIONING TREATMENT. Treat your loved one to a Deep Conditioning Treatment and Haircut for $75. enV.

17. GOURMET ELEGANCE - Handmade chocolate truffles for your love. $23 per pound. Chocolate Smiles.

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18. Lavender Signature Massage. This massage will calm your mind and soothe your tired body. Warm aromatic pack will ease away tension, while lavender essential oils are massaged into the skin. Also includes lavender paraffin infusion for feet. 65 minutes, $98.

La ThĂŠrapie.

19. TIMELESS PHOTOGRAPHY EXCLUSIVE. 30 minute photo session, which includes a 5x7 and 8 wallets for $100. Limited time only! Timeless Photography.

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by mattheW moriarty

MEAT the Family Apex Family Seeks to Restore an American Tradition

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© timeless photography

Craig and Derek Wilkins plan on bringing quality meats to Western Wake. They hope to keep it a family business for generations to come.

The butcher, the milkman, doctors who make house calls — these are mythical figures of the “Leave it to Beaver” 1950s. They are symbols of a simpler, better time in this nation’s history. It was a time when things made sense, the economy was unstoppable and America had faced its enemies and won.

Milkmen are gone, never to return. Why should they when it’s just as easy to pick up a jug at the mega-mart? You’d sooner get your HMO to cover elective surgery than manage to pry a doctor out of his office. But the butcher — the man who knows whether a crown roast will feed a family of six when three of them are your teenage boys who always need seconds and sometimes thirds — is making a comeback, spurred on by American’s newfound interest in organic and/or locally grown foods and a generally increasing awareness about what you put in your body.

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ss © t im e l e

ph o t o g

r a ph y

The secret to a great steak is marbling. An inch and a half is a good thickness for grilling.

It’s a trend that Craig and Cynthia Wilkins of Apex, and their son Derek, are hoping to take advantage of when they open The Meat House in Cary in January. The Wilkinses have been working to open their shop for months.

The retired couple is working with their grown son to open the business in Saltbox Village on Kildaire Farm Road.

The Wilkinses, in doing research before opening the store, found that people wanted more than to pick up a prepackaged steak off the shelf of a grocery store. They wanted someone who would recognize them when they came in and could tell them the difference between a good cut of meat and one better put to use as taco filling. “We’ve noticed it since we got started,” says Craig, Chief Operations Officer. “There’s a real lack of that service we used to get in the ‘50s and ‘60s. I still remember going to the butcher shop as a kid. There’s that historic demand, that pent-up demand. We did feel there was absolutely something missing.”

The first Meat House opened in Portsmouth, New Hampshire in 2003.

Since then, franchises have sprung up all over New England. The Wilkins’ daughter, who lives in Maine, introduced Derek to the butcher shop. Derek recognized immediately that it would be a perfect business to bring back home. He called his parents that night to talk about it and they quickly jumped on board. The shop is scheduled to open January 11th and, along with one opening in Charlotte, will be the firsts in North Carolina. Considering how popular The Meat Shop is up north, where the grilling season is only three months long, Craig thinks the market here for high-quality meats could be huge. He and Cynthia, who’ve been married for 39 years, had been looking for a venture that they could pass on to their three children and five grandchildren. That’s why while most people their age are retiring, the Wilkinses are trying to build a new business.

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The steaks at The Meat House are cut to order. Don’t be afraid to ask the man behind the counter for advice on what makes a good cut of meat and even how best to prepare it.

The shop is likely to have 12 to 15 employees, several managers and caseworkers. (Technically speaking, a “butcher” slaughters the animal and then processes the meat. The Meat House is not a slaughterhouse.

Fifty to 100-pound slabs will arrive at the shop for the employees to cut down.) They’ll be looking for people who want to learn on the job.

“We’re not looking for experienced butchers,” Craig says. “For one thing, they don’t exist.”

The shop can provide all-natural, humane beef and chicken. In addition to beef, poultry, pork and lamb, The Meat Shop can provide wild game like alligator, elk, buffalo and rattlesnake on request. It’s also got Boar’s Head deli meat, cheeses, breads, produce and wines. Shrimp is the only seafood. “Everything you need to make a meal,” Cynthia says. If you’re so inclined, you can take advantage of one of its 14 different marinades, which are vacuum sealed in with the cuts and put into a tumbler to hasten absorption. About the only thing they can’t do, Craig says, is cut up something you killed yourself. “I already had somebody ask if he could bring his deer in.”

Already, people have been contacting the Wilkinses to ask advice.

The secret to a great steak is marbling, Cynthia says. You may think of fat as unhealthy and be culturally programmed to seek out “lean” meat, but fat adds flavor and keeps the steak moist throughout cooking. What you want to look for, Cynthia says, is a cut that has fat throughout the steak, not in big clumps. An inch and a half is a good thickness for grilling.

Everyone likes to cook his or her own way, Craig says, but he prefers to sear the outside with high temperature and then reduce the heat for slow cooking throughout.

They plan on opening three more of the butcher shops in the Triangle in the coming years. The first two additional shops will be in North Raleigh and a different part of Cary. They are looking at Durham and southern Wake County locations for the final store. The vast plans are about more than just making money. They’re about building something his family can proudly take over. “My ideal,” Craig says, “would be to continue to grow the business and bring them in.” And if it resurrects an American archetype in the process, there’s nothing wrong with that.

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Heirloom Stitchery Keeping The Art Alive

by susan ely

If you don’t know the difference between floss and floche, and think pin tucks and a roll and whip are wrestling moves, you’re probably unaware of the activity that has youngsters to senior citizens reaching for their sewing baskets – especially here in the South. It’s heirloom sewing and it’s one of the best-kept secrets in the sewing world.

The term “heirloom” refers to garments fashioned after elegant Victorian clothing: christening gowns, portrait dresses for little girls, and lacy lingerie for wedding trousseaus – all lovingly made to be worn (once) and then handed down to be treasured by future generations. These items traditionally may have taken months or even years to complete by hand, but the current revival, which

actually began in the 70s, takes advantage of hightech sewing machines and sergers.

Why now? Experts in the field, such as Ruth Sparks and Shelley Holmes, co-owners of Elegant Stitches in Cary, say it’s because sewing is a great stress reliever and they find that, “New stitchers are thrilled with their sense of accomplishment and new found knowledge.”

It was their own difficulty in finding materials for their projects that led the duo to open Elegant Stitches 23 years ago. The pair have worked hard to keep the artistry of heirloom sewing alive through a wide offering of classes as well as an extensive inventory of hard-to-find imported French and Swiss fabrics, patterns, supplies and laces.

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“Many of our original customers who were young mothers sewing for their children 23 years ago are now sewing for their grandchildren,” says Holmes. “Their grown daughters are becoming interested in sewing as well.” Children are taking up the hobby, too. The shop recently had several young girls enter their sewing projects in the North Carolina State Fair and came away with ribbons for their efforts.

Whether you dream of hand-smocking a dress for your toddler or embroidering tiny flowers and leaves on a baby blanket for your new grandchild, with the right materials and the proper instruction, you too can create heirloom- quality garments. Imagine making a christening gown that your great-great-granddaughter will wear someday. Now that’s a memory in the making. *Elegant Stitches will host their first annual Heirloom Sewing Retreat on April 16th18th, 2010. The three-day event will be held at the Hilton on the Hill and will feature hand and machine heirloom classes created especially for the occasion by three internationally-known experts. Visit www.elegantstitches.com for more info about the event.

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shades of green

Triangle Business Takes Steps to

Protect

Environment

the

Over the last year we have featured dozens of businesses that have made a commitment to reducing their carbon footprint, from homebuilders and restaurants to developers. Most of the businesses were meeting consumer demands, but in 2010 more businesses are going “green” because of their commitment to the future. The latest area business to make this step is FastPark & Relax. This Cincinnati-based parking business which opened in August 2008 provides airport parking services to customers at RDU and throughout the United States.

“We are proud of the steps we have made as a company with our facility in Raleigh. It sets a new standard of construction and operations practices for our industry and represents a starting point for all future FastPark facilities,” says Melanie Chavez, principal of FastPark.

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How is FastPark going green?

• Water reclamation system for on-site, complimentary car wash – this greatly reduces the demand of fresh water needed for the operations of this system.

• Office building in Raleigh is equipped with an efficient geothermal climate control system – this is typically 40% more energy efficient than traditional roof-top units.

• Covered carport parking reduces the heat island effect associated with large areas of pavement and cement. This helps lower electricity demands for air conditioning use, lowers greenhouse gas emissions and improves air quality.

• Energy efficient (T5) lighting, using photocell control devices under carport roofs is used, instead of high mast light towers. This lowers energy needs and reduces light trespass.

• Twelve-unit shuttle fleet in Raleigh consists entirely of Daimler Chrysler Sprinters, which get more than double the miles per gallon of standard shuttles. Sprinters emit less than half the CO2 per mile than other shuttles.

FastPark & Relax opened its RDU location in August 2008.

“It is important for FastPark to become integrated in the communities we serve. We can only become part of the community if we take a leadership role in responsible operating practices,” says Chavez.

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100th

Anniversary Year

the Perfect Time to Join Scouts

by DAN BAIN | photos Matt Price & Jack Bauer

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Left: Paul K. and Brian B., Scouts with Troop 444 in Fuquay-Varina, load up some of the items collected in their troop’s annual food drive; Above: Paul O., grandson to Scouter Matt Price, practices his lifelong policy of “catch, kiss and release” with his biggest catch – a five-foot catfish from a pond at Wichtrich Farm in Angier.

I

if one boy hadn’t found William Boyce, millions of others might never have found themselves. an american publisher, Boyce was traveling through london in 1909 when he became lost in the fog. a boy approached and offered to lead him to his destination. He tried to tip the boy, who refused and explained that as “a Scout”, he shouldn’t accept payment for a good turn.

Boyce inquired about “Scouting” and learned of lord robert Baden-Powell – a British soldier who’d created a program for English boys, developing leadership and survival skills. Boyce sought Baden-Powell to learn more, came home with a suitcase full of literature and on February 8th, 1910, incorporated the Boy Scouts of america [BSa]. a chance encounter in the fog helped to start an american tradition that’s flourished, increasing youth membership from 61,500 in 1911 to 2.8 million in 2008. That tradition is now 100 years old.

Building character, Fostering Leaders auctioneer matt Price is a local Scouter, or adult leader, who sees the birthday as testament to the program’s quality. “There aren’t many things on this earth that get to 100 years old; it’s really a milestone to the program,” he lauds. “This is once in a lifetime. it speaks volumes about what we’ve done – the two millionth Eagle Scout, the tenth anniversary of venturing, the 100th anniversary of Sea Scouts this year. all of this culminates at the national Jamboree this coming summer, when we’ll probably have 60,000 Scouts from all over the world show up to celebrate this one event.”

Price leads two Scouting units in Fuquay-varina and volunteers at the district and national levels of the BSa. He’s done so intermittently since 1988, attributing one reason for his motivation: “it’s the drive to put on a program for the boys that will make it enjoyable for them and pique their interest.”

Having joined cub Scouts in 1978 and Boy Scouts in 1981, Price worked his way up to the rank of life Scout. That experience, he says, “has allowed me to set my ethics bar high…it’s also led me to a career where ethics must be high.”

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Above: Members of Troop 444 inspect a plane with pilot Cecil Edgerton during their annual trip to the Harnett County Airport, where they fly as a requirement for the Aviation Merit Badge. Left: Scout Stefan L. takes a water break between classes during Occoneechee Council Summer Camp at Camp Durant in Carthage.

Scouting has led plenty of other people to careers, says the BSa, such as 57.4 percent of U.S. astronauts. additionally, more than 40 percent of the members of the 111th congress were once Scouts or Scouters.

Strong careers come from strong leadership – a quality that Price says develops naturally in Scouts. “Patrol leaders will reach back and pull everybody up with them,” he explains.

“That’s what we’re striving for in Scouting – to create the next generation of leaders who can reach back and pull the least of us up with the best of us.”

Scouting’s Foundation and Organization additionally, the program builds character and instills ethics – thanks to adherence to the Scout law, which states that a Scout is trustworthy, loyal, helpful, friendly, courteous, kind, obedient, cheerful, thrifty, brave, clean and reverent.

Following it, Price says, “has allowed me to balance out community service, ethics and just about everything in everyday life to develop as an overall person.”

Scouting has three divisions: cub Scouting, for boys in first through fifth grades; Boy Scouting, for boys aged 11-17; and venturing, for young men and women aged 14-20.

These are made up of local units – Packs, Troops or crews, respectively – that follow BSa guidelines under the operation of chartered organizations such as churches, schools and civic groups.

Within each unit, Scouts work on BSa-set achievements, which are intended to be fun and educational while developing character. They include activities to improve the Scouts themselves or the world around them, and are recognized via more than 65 cub Scout awards and more than 150 Boy Scout awards.

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From Bobcat to eagle – and Beyond The achievements also help Scouts advance in rank. cub Scouts must earn the Bobcat Badge, then progress through four age-differentiated ranks: Tiger, Wolf, Bear and Webelos. Boy Scouts progress through six ranks: Tenderfoot, Second class, First class, Star, life and Eagle.

The Eagle Scout rank is the result of an arduous career spanning hundreds of achievements, numerous reviews and the planning, leading and execution of a major service project that benefits the greater community. attorney John o’Quinn earned his Eagle in 1990, while living in Fuquay-varina. now living in Washington, D.c., o’Quinn served as Deputy associate attorney general from 2006-2009, earning the Secretary of Defense medal for Exceptional Public Service and a Special commendation from the U.S. Department of Justice civil Division. He lists them on his resume with one other honor – his Eagle Scout designation. “it means a lot to me when i see someone else who is one,” he says of the rank. “it’s a testimony to their intestinal fortitude and ability to carry through, and it tells me a lot about that person.”

Having argued federal cases pertaining to national security and constitutional rights, o’Quinn attributes his drive to Scouting, which he says gave him a desire to serve his country. He also credits Scouting for the qualities that helped him become successful. “Scouting taught me the virtues of setting out to do something and finishing it. it also taught me real leadership skills,” he says. “i learned the values of leadership, and that’s been invaluable in my career.”

The Scouts of Troop 444 build a gateway to be judged as a camp entrance.

To understand Scouting, says o’Quinn, “look at the good it does and what a difference it makes in boys’ lives.” good thing it made a difference in Boyce’s life, or multiple generations might still be lost in a fog.

To learn more or to find a unit near you, contact the BSA’s Occoneechee Council at 919-872-4884.

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living

h e a lt h y

how to make a new year’s resolution

like you mean it!

EDUCATION

What food does your body type need to thrive?

How is your current diet slowly making you sick?

How can you eat healthy on a budget? When the willpower begins to wane, it is the education that can motivate you to move forward.

INSPIRATION

by JEANINE FINELLI

are you in that “place” again? you know, that place in your mind where your thoughts circle around how to become healthier, lose weight, have more energy and perhaps reclaim your power over things like sugar, caffeine, soda, fast food or smoking? Then read on to learn why willpower alone won’t help you, and why other tools are a must for success! resolutions are about baby steps, so be practical, patient, and embrace the journey as you begin to fall in love with that beautiful, intuitive person…

you!

What has inspired you to make necessary changes?

For most people, it is realizing that they are worth the effort. When this happens, they no longer do it for a spouse, friend or relative who has been nagging them to make a change. They do it for themselves. inspiration can come in the form of spirituality, a loved one, or whatever whispers to your soul. For others, it can take a tragic, lifealtering event to inspire change.

SUPPORT SYSTEM

Without this, all the brown rice and organics in the world will not make you a well person! Take a moment to think about your co-workers and relatives and the way they can unintentionally sabotage your health. The unhealthy lunch crowd, or the person with the chocolate on their desk. you know who you are! The smoke break you take together.

The nuggets your kids are asking for that you nibble on! getting healthy may mean ending any toxic relationship that is negative and draining. after all, true friends help you strive for more, believe in you and aren’t threatened by your success. Being held accountable is one of the single largest factors in a successful transition.

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WILLPOWER

The intense desires for change that we feel in January are crucial, but not enough to sustain the transition towards health. inspiration, education, rewards and a support system are essential for the long haul.

REWARDS

your cholesterol has gone down 40 points! you are thrilled and want to treat yourself to a steak dinner. you have greatly reduced certain foods from your diet in order to reach your goal, and you deserve it, don’t you? Think again. maybe there is another way to tell yourself “i love you”…and mean it. instead, how about a movie, massage, or maybe an afternoon out with some friends while your spouse spends the day with the kids. Whatever the reward is, try not to make it be the very thing that is derailing your health.

FOOD CHOICES

advertisers spend billions of dollars to market their products. Bright packages with unfounded health claims can be so confusing – it’s no wonder some americans feel like they need a degree in nutrition to buy bread! The “food” they are selling to us is less of what mother nature created and more of what man has created with toxins. Have you ever stopped to wonder why so many people are sick in this country, or why a salad costs more than a fast food hamburger? Why don’t the ingredients on food packaging sound like foods we can identify?

We prefer to blame our poor health on genetics or on others, but the truth is that lifestyle choices have a much greater impact than genetics do on our health. However, given half a chance, the human body will not only crave healthier foods, but begin to repair and heal itself. a true health care system is about prevention and education, not strictly medication. after all, that might be called a sick care system instead of health care. What system do you want to be in? Eat like your life depends on it...

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h e a lt h y

living

Keeping That Weight Loss Resolution

recent research shows that while 52% of participants in a resolution study were confident of success with their goals, only 12% actually achieved them. Does this mean that you are doomed to be included in the 88% group of people who will not follow through on their goals? Quite simply, yes you are. That is, unless you go about setting and achieving your goals with proper planning, education and accountability.

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DR. GEORGE T. BARTELS BARTELS MEDICAL ASSOCIATES, PLLC

12/22/09 12:27:17 PM

Visualize success. Create a mental picture of the new, improved you.

Focus on this image when you’re tempted to blow off your goal.

Stay positive. If you slip up one month, let it go and get back on track.

Only make a few resolutions at a time.

It’s better to do one thing well than several things poorly (or not at all).

Practice new behaviors that encourage success. People who want to stop smoking don’t hang out in smoke-filled bars or casinos. Likewise, if you want to lose weight, don’t bring desserts, junk food, candy or ice cream into the house. Limit your exposure to people who are likely to encourage resolution-breaking. There’s a reason parolees aren’t allowed to hang out with known criminals – they’re a bad influence. Surround yourself with good, supportive people.

Take any necessary action needed to get started. Make important appointments with a doctor, sign up for a gym membership or buy any equipment you need.

Substitute a good habit for the bad one you want to break.

If your goal is to eat less junk food, find a healthy alternative.

If the healthy alternative is something like going for a walk instead of a food item even better!

The same research shows that men and women achieve their goals differently, particularly when it comes to losing weight. Men are 22% more successful with reaching their goals if they set small, measurable goals. For instance: A man should set a goal of losing a pound a week instead of saying he is going to lose at least 50 pounds this year. Women, on the other hand, succeeded 10% more when they made their goals public and got support from their friends. For instance: A woman should have a “diet partner” or “diet coach” to watch over her shoulder, diet with them and/or offer encouragement along the way. BOTH sexes were more successful losing weight when they were weighed in by someone else and had a significant health risk or a monetary investment.

Bartels Medical Associates, PLLC is a non-surgical, medical weight loss program serving the Triangle area.

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h e a lt h y

living

the world always looks

smile.

brighter

from behind a

~ Anonymous

Did You Know…Women smile 62 times a day – on average, that’s 54 MORE times than most men smile in a day (only 8!).

Does your smile look the best it can? If not, here are a few ideas on making your smile sensational!

Liquid Smile™, the first and only professional whitening pen, offers consumers convenient, professional and affordable teeth whitening. Liquid Smile is easy to apply, takes less than one minute. $99.

- Carolina Medi Spa

A Reason to Smile...Restoring your comfort and confidence with dental implants.

- Dr. Paul Kazmer

Jane Iredale Sugar Butter Lip Treatment.

Soft, beautiful and oh-so-kissable lips are yours with this lip exfoliator/plumper duo.

Organic brown sugar gently removes dull, dry skin. Then, apply the tinted lip plumper to moisten and plump. $24. (mention Cary Living for 20% off)

- Carolina Medi Spa

Six Month Smiles® has taken the best aspects of braces and modified the treatment and the materials to give adults a common-sense, cosmetic solution that fits their lifestyle. Average treatment times of only six months using clear brackets and tooth-colored wires that are barely visible.

- Preston Dental Center

Did you know…That after the eyes, the smile is the first thing noticed about a person.

If that is true, what does your smile say about you?

Do you avoid smiling?

Would you feel more confident if your teeth looked better?

Eminence Organic Three-Step Lip Treatment. Erase winter dryness with gentle fruit enzymes that refine the lip area, followed by an extra-rich masque that deeply hydrates. Finish with a delicious minty balm that stimulates lip-plumping collagen. - Eminence Day Spa

If you have always dreamed of the perfect smile or know someone who is deserving of a smile makeover, we want to hear from you. Dr. Paul Kazmer and Cary Living will help you get the smile you’ve always wanted.

Email us your story of how you think a beautiful smile would change your life to greatsmile@caryliving.com and one reader will be chosen for a smile makeover!

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sightings

be seen...

C a r o l i na family e stat e p lanning o p e n house

Carolina Family Estate Planning held their first open house on Saturday, October 24th.

Family, friends and neighbors enjoyed frozen custard from locally-owned Goodberry’s Creamery. Carolina Family Estate Planning focuses on the needs of growing families to ensure lifelong enjoyment of prosperity and financial security, all on a flat-fee basis.

S i l e nt Auc t i o n fo r B r e a st C a nc e r Nirvelli Day Spa, located in the Preston area, held a silent auction for breast cancer on October 22.

Proceeds went to the Pretty in Pink Foundation and patients with breast cancer. Nirvelli Day Spa is a full-service spa offering skin care services, body treatments and massage therapy along with chiropractic treatments, manicures and pedicures.

market street square opens in holly springs

Boylan Companies proudly marked the grand opening of its Holly Springs mixed-use community, Main Street Square, with a day-long celebration. The event kicked off with a formal ribbon cutting, attended

by Holly Springs Mayor Dick Sears, Holly Springs Chamber of Commerce members and team members of Boylan Development Company, followed by a public celebration complete with family-friendly activities and community tours. An evening VIP gala at the community’s recreation center concluded the evening, with over 150 people in attendance.

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sightings

K r i st e n’s S hoe B ou tique O p e n house

G arden hut b ec omes winter wonderland

Kristen’s Shoe Boutique held an Open House on November 12th featuring the jewelry lines of Moon & Lola. Kelly Shatat, Moon & Lola Designer, was on hand to greet guests as they shopped.

Kristen and her staff assisted guests with their shoe selections. Refreshments were enjoyed by all.

m a no r v i l l ag e grand o p e n i ng

The Manor Village at Preston celebrated its grand opening on Thursday, November 12th.

Refreshments and hors d’oeuvres were served as guests toured the many amenities offered by the community.

The Garden Hut transforms into a winter wonderland each November to become a fully stocked Christmas Shop. The Holiday Open House features over 15 theme-decorated trees, great food by Camille’s Sidewalk Café and music by Tom’s Creek Bluegrass Band.

A rtists & A ngels Open house at The nature of art Rocky Alexander gave an oil painting demo at The Nature of Art during their Artists & Angels Open House. Rocky is the featured artist for January.

Meet her at a free reception on Friday, January 8th from 6-8 p.m.

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Want your event featured in our sightings? Call

be seen...

april maness (919) 621-8529

glenair annual phi senior olypiCs

Glenaire Retirement Community held their 2nd Annual PHI Senior Olympics on October 21st.

Competitors chose from a variety of activities ranging from sporting events such as chair volleyball and table tennis to ballroom dancing and quiz bowl.

to B aC C o r oa d ou t d o o r s r i B B on C u t t i ng C e r e m ony

Tobacco Road Outdoors held its Ribbon Cutting Ceremony on December 7th in downtown Apex. Guests enjoyed refreshments as they browsed the selections of outdoor gear, shoes, apparel and equipment.

stampede to eXCellenCe fundraising auCtion

Middle Creek High School held its annual Stampede to Excellence Fundraising Auction on Saturday, December 5th at the school.

Guests enjoyed dinner, drinks and live entertainment as well as a live and silent auction.

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in the next issue MARCH | APRIL 2010

You’ve heard it said “It’s all in the details,” and that’s exactly right when it comes to drawer pulls, door knobs, faucets and light fixtures. We’ll show you how to choose the right fixtures for your home.

There are more spas than ever before – how do you choose the right one for you? We’ll take you inside the area’s best spas and show you their specialities.

Getting the perfect family photo can send almost any family over the edge…we talk to local photographers for tips on picture perfect photos, from clothing choices to location and even the best time of day.

Plus the best spring looks for children!

every issue

SIGHTINGS • HEALTHY LIVING TIPS • RECIPES • & MORE! Look for the MARCH | APRIL edition on the shelves the first week of March.

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