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SPECIAL INSERTS

- SHE HUSTLES TALKS - FASHION AT THE BOUTIQUE

Kristen Bauer-Gross TAKING ACTION ON HER DREAM

PLUS...

- TALKING HOMELESSNESS WITH MARY LUPIEN - UNSTOPPABLE WOMAN WITH PAM DENTON - NAVIGATING THROUGH COVID-19 & MORE!


WE DON’T JUST SELL ESTATE JEWELRY, W IT TOO!

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ESTATE & FINE JEWELRY BY HARRY 3025 MONROE AVENUE ROCHESTER, (585) 453-2860 WWW.KRIKORIANJE


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REGULARS

REGULARS

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CNY INSPIRING WOMAN Dr. Shanelle Benson Reid

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TRACY TALKS

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ANIMAL CARE SACTUARY CORNER

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YOU MATTER

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LIVING CONFIDENTLY

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A WOMAN’S PERSPECTIVE

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WOMAN WHO INSPIRES Felicia Fracassi

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MANIFESTING YOUR TRUE PURPOSE

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CHILDREN AWAITING PARENTS

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WOMEN IN POLITICS

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IN HER OWN WORDS Meredith Dawes

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KARMA SPEAKS

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GO

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VISIONARY MINDS Sherry Genga

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FOR A GOOD CAUSE The Geneva Half Marathon

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WOMEN OF STRENGTH

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TIME TO FLY LADIES

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FASHION FORWARD

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REAL ESTATE WITH RITA

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BEAUTY TALKS

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GIVING BACK AT RGH

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HER EDGE

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COACHING WITH KRISTIN

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CROWN POSSE

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SHE HUSTLES ENTREPRENEUHERS Dana Madison Interiors Novi Paluch Lummier Medi Spa Hope in Art Studios OGLearn Vega Family Chiropractic Hair by Cassie Pinot’s Palette

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HEALTH & WELLNESS

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MIND, BODY & SPIRIT

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THE FITNESS DIVA

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MENTAL THINKING

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ASK ROBIN HERTZ

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GET VITALIZED

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LIFE IN BALANCE

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PARTNERS IN A JOURNEY

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ASK THE DOCTOR

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MENTALLY THINKING

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THRIVING THERAPY

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{ FROM THE PUBLISHER }

“The strongest actions for a woman is to love herself, be herself and shine amongst those who never believed she could.”

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his edition of Rochester Woman Online brings you an amazing cover woman who is not scared to follow her dreams, Kristin Bauer-Gross. “Don’t be afraid to go after your goals and find the courage to take action on your dream! ” Be sure to read all about her amazing story of empowerment starting on page [22].

We are very excited to be announcing an all new Rochester Woman Online platform called “She Hustles Talks”. This is a Youtube channel and LIVE ZOOM videos for all the entrepreneuHERs out there, where we can come together to build our community, share our business, talk about tips and ideas and “dish” with other lady bosses from all over the area. This plaform will also include a monthly special section feature 10 hustlin boss ladies. As leaders, we need a vision of where we want to go. Holding each other up and supporting one another as a team will only help to get us there! Join us if you know you crave success, believe in your brand/ business, want to support other women in your local community and want to create a legacy. Check out this section on page [35]. Here’s to women empowering women, by empowering each other.

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ON OUR COVER

On our cover this month we have model, coach and empowering woman Kristin Bauer-Gross. A Photographed on location by Dan Doyle.

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{ A LOOK AT OUR TEAM }

PUBLISHER ASSOCIATED EDITOR CREATIVE DIRECTOR/GRAPHIC DESIGN LEAD PHOTOGRAPHER PHOTOGRAPHY

CONTRIBUTING WRITERS

ADVERTISING SALES SOCIAL MEDIA DIRECTORS WEB DESIGN & MANAGEMENT

Kelly Breuer Tammy Reese Kelly Breuer Charlene Mann Ford Dan Doyle Devin Mack Charlene Mann Jason Breese Mark Knopp Tammy Reese Mary Lupien Robin DeWind Olga Monacell Alana Cahoon Lisa Wagner Judi Swanson Dr Larry Peshkin Christina McDonald Indra Quagliata Denise Karma Clifford Dr Pam Denton Giovanna Walton Tracy Simone Becky Picone Ellen Feldman Terry Daniele Meredith Dawes Robin Hertz Alicia Hicks Bonnie Floyd Kristin Bauer-Gross Tammy Vreeland Devon McLeod Laurie McKnight

Angela Vahue Lay’Lah Jennifer Frary Daniella Woodward Jeffrey Hoffman Apple Domingo Dana Madison Natalya Gristka Cassie Bartosch Reese Jones

Kelly Breuer Katie Lawler-Melia & Toni Natalie The Next Design

Rochester Woman ONLINE is the premier professional woman’s online publication in the greater Rochester area. Our feature articles address major topics that interest local women. Each issue includes articles on health, fashion, fitness, finance, dining, lifestyle and personal perspectives, as well as a spotlight on local area women. The electronic magazines are distributed freely through your favorite app store and will be in your inbox electronically by the first week of every month. The publication is available free of charge. Please feel free to contact publisher Kelly Breuer at 585.727.9120 or you can email us at networkrocqueen@gmail.com. Download our current media kit at www. rochesterwomanonline.com. The magazine is published 12 times a year by Rochester Woman ONLINE. Copyright © 2020 Rochester Woman ONLINE. No part of this magazine may be reproduced or republished without the consent of the publisher. Rochester Woman ONLINE is not responsible for unsolicited submissions, manuscripts, photos or artwork. All such submissions become the property of Rochester Woman ONLINE and will not be returned.


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KRISTIN BAUER-GROSS PHOTOS BY DAN DOYLE & MARK KNOPP

I jumped out of my 3rd floor office window! I saw my body flailing toward the pavement below. Then I looked up at my computer and spreadsheets. Suffocating. I felt like I was suffocating, dying inside.

There I was 10 years later at 24, still not taking action on my dream. I gave 2 weeks’ notice at my job. Packed all my stuff into my car.

Why couldn’t I just be happy? Why did I keep imagining I was leaping out of my office window? All of my unemployed college friends congratulated me on landing a well-paid 9-5. My boss was amazing.

It felt crazy to leave my well-paid position in beautiful Connecticut. But my dream since I was 14, was to make a full time living as a model.

Shortly after arrival my car got towed and cost….you guessed it $300 to retrieve. Perfect, now I’m broke. My back-up plan if I failed was to beg my mom to let me move back home.And *gulp* find a normal job. (Grateful to have mom as a back-up plan not everyone is so lucky).It was time to stop staring out of windows daydreaming about my career as a model.

I moved into a beautiful apartment in an affluent neighborhood in Connecticut. On the outside it looked like I had the dream life; but inside I felt like I was dying. Each day from my office chair, I felt my dream sitting in the pit of my stomach begging me to take ACTION. Every time I would allow myself to dream all the fears would come up. What if I fail? What if I quit this job and end up broke and washed up? What if I’m not pretty enough, thin enough, talented enough, tall enough? What if I get scammed? But even with all the fears I couldn’t ignore this feeling. I had to find the courage to go after my dream. But how?

a room I found on roommates.com My bank account had only $300 after relocation expenses.

It was time to take ACTION! I remember wishing so badly for an honest knowledgeable industry person to help me. I wanted more career direction from my agent back home, but she was too busy with her own agency and her expertise was limited to the upstate NY. My mom and dance mentor Sean McLeod encouraged me to pursue my dream which helped give me the courage to finally go for it!

Drove for 2 days from Connecticut to Miami, FL. Alone. I knew no one. No clear plan. No industry connections. I borrowed money from my sister to pay 1st month rent and security for

Yet, I kept wishing for a successful veteran model who could tell me the inside scoop and lay out a plan for me.I wanted the quickest path to success. That is how I started my full-time modeling journey in Miami. ROCHESTER WOMAN ONLINE :: EMPOWERMENT EDITION 2020

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“Don’t be afraid to go after your goals and find the courage to take action on your dream! ”

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{ COVER STORY } “Coach, your wisdom and knowledge of the industry has shortened our learning curve immensely. You invest so much in your clients and it shows!” Katrina W

These 7 years were a combination of successes and failures. I fell into every pitfall. I wore the wrong outfits to auditions that made me look “too green” and “too small town”.I spent too much time and energy shooting for free with the wrong photographers. It seemed like a waste of money to pay photographers when so many would shoot me for free. I spent too much time pursuing assignments that were not suited to my type and look. After going through all of those struggles, looking back, I wish someone had encouraged me to pursue other types of modeling. Wish I shot with the right photographer for those other niches of modeling sooner. Wish I had gotten commercial acting training with a top industry expert. Wish someone had helped me develop a more competitive look and mindset sooner. Wish someone was cheerleading me on and helping me develop more confidence. Wish I had supportive people around me instead of a boyfriend that thought my dream was silly. Wish I had strategies to handle the jealous models who didn’t want to see the new girl succeed. Less jobs for them. Or so they thought. I thought we should, instead all be

friends, and help one another and refer one another jobs. Wasn’t there room for all of us at the top? It became a very difficult and lonely career at times. I almost gave up 100 times. My family and friends were far away back home in Upstate NY. There was no Google, no Youtube, no Instagram, no smartphones.

Beach, FL. For $500 he said he would help me develop my look, my portfolio, niche in the industry, take hi-caliber photos, provide make-up and styling. W H AT ! F I V E H U N D R E D DOLLARS!!! At the time I said to myself “that is a TON of MONEY!” “NO WAY!” “What if I spend all this money and it doesn’t help me make more money?” I had already spent money on things that didn’t work and look where that got me. NOWHERE. Plus, so many photographers will shoot me for FREE. “I can’t invest in myself like that” I thought. I didn’t make the investment, instead I wasted another 4 years without much career growth. But today I know the opposite is true, that the quickest path to success is through expert help.

In those early years of my model career, my days were spent trying to figure everything out all by myself. I fell into all the pitfalls. Got myself into some scary situations. I invested money into the wrong things I thought would help my career. Yet, failed to invest in the right things that would’ve given me a quicker path to success. I met a photographer who was also known for being a model coach. I met him my first week arriving in Miami

Four years later I did fork over even more money for that photographer’s coaching and help. His rates had gone up, so I paid even more than the $500. But it was worth every single penny. He helped me focus my goals. He gave me advice on my hair and nutrition. And he helped me get the most gorgeous high-quality photos I had ever shot in my life. MY WHOLE CAREER CHANGED OVERNIGHT! His photos and advice helped me get ROCHESTER WOMAN ONLINE :: EMPOWERMENT EDITION 2020

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{ COVER STORY } “My motivation as a model and talent career coach began because I got many questions daily from people interested in getting started in modeling, acting, promotions, and entertainment. ”

noticed by agencies, other photographers and leveled up my portfolio. He helped me believe in myself. His connections helped me get more work. That year, was my most successful year of modeling in Miami. I got published in several magazines and catalogs (published tearsheets are street cred for models). I walked in dozens of high-end fashion shows. Bigger agencies were interested in signing me. I started to get more callbacks and bookings soared! The very next year the whole economy crashed in 2008. All modeling and acting work in Miami and across the nation dried up! 26

Next, a close family member fell ill. I moved back home to rural Upstate NY as caretaker. It felt like I was just getting started and then it all crumbled before my eyes. But that success I felt and what I learned before the recession, taught me how to be resilient. As the recession passed the next phase of my career reached new levels of success! I’m so glad I invested in myself and got that photographer’s help. Otherwise I might of given up on my dream altogether when the recession hit. But what if I hadn’t waited 4 years for his coaching? What if I had gotten more career guidance and the right photos

ROCHESTER WOMAN ONLINE :: EMPOWERMENT EDITION 2020

sooner? Of course, I had no idea the economy would topple and a family member would fall ill. No idea my time in Miami would end abruptly. Now, I try to seize each day because we don’t know what tomorrow will bring. There isn’t always a tomorrow. My life mission now, is motivating and inspiring others to find the courage to go after their dreams. Even if family, friends, or society think the dream is silly or ridiculous. We each have special gifts and a unique story to share. I can’t go back in time to be the support and career expert I needed. But I can be that guidance for YOU!


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{{ COVER COVER STORY STORY }} “I can’t go back in time to be the support and career expert I needed. But I can be that guidance for YOU!”

I was able to find meaning in everything I went through and now I’m able to use it together to serve you. My motivation as a model and talent career coach began because I got many questions daily from people interested in getting started in modeling, acting, promotions, and entertainment. I’d give people a few tips and send them on their way knowing they really would need so much more guidance and support. Finally, I completely switched my health coaching practice to model coaching, based on the demand. Now, I enjoy helping others find their courage and developing a plan for their dream. It makes my heart sing to be the help I wished and prayed for as an aspiring model and talent. As a new model or actor, the many things one must learn can be overwhelming: • How to determine the right niche for you • How to manifest the goal you desire • How to present yourself to agencies as a professional • How to use social media effectively as a tool • How to develop your Instagram into a branded portfolio • How to walk the runway with grace and ease • How to confidently attend auditions and castings

• How to self-tape auditions at home like a pro • How to nail paid bookings and book yourself solid! I created the ACTION membership model and talent training program, so that you can get quality affordable training, a coach to guide you, and community on your side to take you on the faster path to success! I’m giving

Don’t be afraid to go after your goals and find the courage to take action on your dream! What people are saying about Coach Kristin and the ACTION Program: Amy M – “I don’t feel so awkward about talking about my modeling dreams to the Action members... we are all in this together!! I have appreciated the Action team encouragement and being comfortable talking about it. I think my biggest take-away is that models come in all shapes and sizes and there is a niche for everyone. This has given me courage to take action and allowed me to do something for myself.” Katrina W- “Coach, your wisdom and knowledge of the industry has shortened our learning curve immensely. You invest so much in your clients and it shows!”

RWO readers a very special offer of just $1.00 for their 1st month of membership! Use code: 1Dollar at checkout on www. KristinB.com/action-program Intro pricing is still in effect through spring: - $49.00 a month (minimum 4 months commitment) - $490.00 annual membership After spring pricing will increase!

I’m your Model Success Coach: Kristin Bauer-Gross. You’ll find me hanging out on Instagram and Facebook @KristinBauerGross and on www.KristinB.com and teaching my online program ACTION designed specifically for small market models and actors to learn, connect and succeed at www.KristinB.com/action-program SPECIAL OFFER for RWO readers: 1st month of membership just $1.00 with code at checkout: 1Dollar

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Live your smile to the fullest.

TM

INDRA QUAGLIATA, DDS

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C A L L TO DAY F O R A F R E E C O N S U LTAT I O N

@IQ_Dentistry @IQFamilyDentistry

IQ DENTISTRY 300 White Spruce Blvd. Suite 134 Rochester, NY 14623


SPECIAL INSERT

SHE HUSTLES TALKS WOMEN OWNED BUSINESSES

WOMAN OWNED BUSINESSES

-FASHION DESIGNER NOVI PALUCH - HOPE IN ART - HAIR BY CASSIE - DANA MADISON INTERIORS - PINOT’S PALETTE - VEGA FAMILY CHIROPRACTIC AND MORE!

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COME ENJOY THE BEAUT SUITE#1

ROCHESTER WOMAN ONLINE SHE HUSTLES TALKS ROCHESTER WOMAN’S BOUTIQUE STUDIOS

SUITE#3

NAILS BY PRESHAY

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INDIGO FLOW MUSIC STUDIOS

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FAMILY FIRST HAIR STUDIO

301 EXCHANGE BLVD LL1 I ROCHESTE


UTIFUL SUITE LIFE WITH US! SUITE#6

PERFECT 10 NAILS

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PCK SALON

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ER, NEW YORK 14608 I (585) 278-0314


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DANA MADISON INTERIORS BY DANA MADISON

Hi, Im Dana Madison, owner of Dana Madison Interiors based out of Rochester, NY. I offer full service residential and commercial design. My goal is create beautiful livable spaces and keep your project on budget. I graduated from Syracuse University school of VPA in Interior Design and a minor in Architecture. Contact me to request an in-person design consultant.

Dana Madison Interiors is a fullservice Interior Design Studio in Rochester,NY. Creating homes and offices that are beautiful and timeless, yet with a minimalist lay back approach to enhance your lifestyle. I believe one of the best ways to build your collection is to purchase one good piece of furniture every year. Once you have it in your home, see

what you love about it and decide what piece will complement it next. Be sure to stay tuned for monthly design tips from me in Rochester Woman Online starting in May.


“If you are stuck on a home design project, Dana can get you past it! We had been wanting to redo our spare room that we use as an office for a loonng time. I just had no idea how to configure the space, what furniture to get, how to make it all match! Dana was able to see past our clutter and design the perfect home office. We love the space now, and I would have never been able to put it together without her!! Hands down, if you need help with a home design project, save yourself some stress and time. Call a professional, like Dana! �


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{ SHE HUSTLES TALKS } “What Spring design/trends and tips would you like to know more about? Just contact Dana...”

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{ { SHE {HUSTLES SHE HUSTLES ENTREPRENHERS TALKS } }} SHEHUSTLES ENTREPRENHERS

NOVI PALUCH WITH SASMITA BATIK BY APPLE DOMINGO

BEAUTIFUL HAND MADE INDONESIAN BATIK IS NOW AVAILABLE IN BUFFALO, NEW YORK AT SASMITA BATIK INDONESIA.

610 Main Street in Buffalo’s theater district.

SASMITA BATIK, GOES TO NEW YORK FASHION WEEK

I made my way to Buffalo New York in 2008 by way of Jakarta, Indonesia where I worked as a trader at the Indonesian Stock Exchange. I noticed immediately how friendly people were and right away I realized Buffalo truly is the city of good neighbors. After spending more time in the city, I saw an opportunity in the local market to offer a fine selection of hand made Indonesian Batik, an artform and type of style I’ve long been familiar with. After selling retail merchandise alongside other vendors for over a year, I made a bold decision to set up operations at the Market Arcade and opened Sasmita Batik during the 2011 holiday season . That bold decision soon proved to be the right one and Samsita has become a staple in the downtown Buffalo community. You can find Sasmita Batik at it’s new home at 58

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was invited to showcase her designs in New York Fashion Week, one of the most prestigious fashion shows in the country. Sasmita Batik Indonesia showcased her designs along side iconic designers like Michael Kors, Marc Jacobs, Christian Siriano and Nicole Miller to name a few. NY Fashion week organizers were searching for international clothing designers and came across Sasmita Batik Indonesia. They reached out to Paluch and she submitted her portfolio. Three months later, she received news that she will be showing at NY Fashion Week. Pa l u c h c h o s e t o showcase her “Jumputan Kawung Batik” collection. The red color symbolizes universal energy and the sacred origin of life. Paluch stated the collection empowers oneself with energy and passion.

Fall 2019, 11 years after moving to Buffalo, Novi Paluch is at the top of her game. Sasmita Batik Indonesia

610 Man Street Buffalo, NY 14202 (716) 949-0192 www.sasmitabatik.com Follow us on:


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{ WOMEN OWNED BUSINESSES } “Paluch chose to showcase her “Jumputan Kawung Batik” collection. The red color symbolizes universal energy and the sacred origin of life. ”

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LUMMIER MED SPA BY NATALYA GRITSAK

Natalya Gritsak has 23 years of experience in business management. She loves to bring our community together. She delights in planning and coordinating patient and community events for Lummier Medi Spa. Her love for the industry truly runs through her veins. She’s always known that aesthetics and customer service are her passions and Lummier Medi Spa is a perfect fit for her. She is experienced and comfortable working in all areas of the industry. From day to day staff management, to working with treatment providers, Natalya Gritsak is an integral part of the Lummier Medi Spa team. Lummier Med Spa offers traditional services that have long been proven to gain the results our guests have come to expect from a boutique med spa. However, our service offerings do not stop there. Lummier Medi Spa’s vision is to be the innovative leader in the medical spa industry by offering the latest cutting-edge technologies and therapies offered in the wellness and aesthetics industry. Lummier Medi Spa is purpose driven; helping women and men of all ages to look beautiful and feel confident in their own skin. We are also driven to help our guests meet their personal beautification and wellness goals. Our highly educated expert team of medical professionals and practitioners 68

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focus on meeting the needs of our guest by recommending products and services that are sure to get the results they want for themselves. We understand that everyone’s needs are different. Therefore, we create individualized health and beauty plans that are designed to meet their

Medi Spa offers the full spectrum of innovative, age-reversing treatments geared to rejuvenate your complexion and replenish lost stores of collagen and elastin, restoring youthfulness and joie de vivre in the process! While these compounds have become increasingly well-known in the past ten years, it’s important to remember that only a team of highly trained and vetted aestheticians will have the skill, education and artistry to accurately inject your skin and ensure a pain-free, seamless outcome that appears natural and spontaneous. Practitioners without the proper experience and credentials can wreak havoc on your skin, in some cases causing permanent damage. Our nurses and aestheticians are distinguished healthcare providers who have performed thousands of successful lummiér Medical spa BOTOX and other injections. We are frequently sought out by our upstate New York aria clientele and by those from all around the country and abroad for our commitment to excellence.

specific needs. Lummier Medi Spa’s commitment to providing results oriented products and services to our guests is nothing like you’ve ever experienced from a medical spa before. At the Lummier Medi Spa, glowing skin is no longer a luxury, but your new everyday reality. Our top Lummier

BOTOX and other injectable clients will find that treatment is tailored to their individual anatomy. There is simply no such thing as one-injectionfits-all at The lummiér MEDI spa. Our work is subtle, nuanced and geared to exploit the patient’s attributes at every turn. Lummiermedispa.com


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565 BLOSSOM RD UNIT G2 I ROCHESTER, NY 14610 I 1 (585) 750 151


11 I LUMMIERMEDISPA@ICLOUD.COM I WWW.LUMMIERMEDISPA.COM


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HOPE IN ART STUDIO BY LESLEY SHAKESPEARE-BROGAN

ART IS NOURISHING FOR THE SOUL My name is Lesley Shakespeare-Brogan and I own Hope In Art Studio, located at 144 Mill St, Canandaigua NY. Whether you are a beginner or intermediate you will find something here to get excited about. Art has the ability to lift our spirits. As a teacher I am here to inspire, give you the tools you need, teach you the right techniques and create an atmosphere you can socialize as well as learn in. Many people are under the false assumption that art is a gift that people are born with. This notion could not be further from the truth. Even though there are varying degrees of creativity Art is a learned skill! All you need is desire and a good teacher! Beginners are my specialty! There is always many exciting things going on at my studio. From Paint n’ Sips, Date n’ Paints, Mother/Daughter workshops, Family

Nights, Corporate & Work Team Parties and more. Hold your own workshop! I come to you bringing all materials and instruction. Perfect for birthdays, girls nights, work parties or team building. All you have to do is choose the project you’d like to paint from www.Pinterest.com/lbrogan2-paint-

night-ideas. You can also use my facility/studio for your paint party if you do not have space to hold one in your home. Or come join us for a fun and relaxing afternoon of stillness, where you will learn the tools to relax and become a human “be”-ing instead of just a human “do”-ing!

This workshop will begin with an hour long gentle yoga class, taught by a registered yoga teacher, infused with deep stretching, mindfulness and mini-meditations. We will then create a Mandala together on black paper using colored pencils. This process will be facilitated by short mindful meditations. The Mandala is an ancient symbol used to balance and center ourselves. This is a form of active meditation that combines the mindful based practice of art, science and spirituality. It also is a stress management tool and promotes physical, emotional and spiritual healing. Come connect with your Self and with others! $60 includes all supplies and British Cream Tea as a refreshment Please bring a yoga mat if you have one and a large beach towel ROCHESTER WOMAN ONLINE :: EMPOWERMENT EDITION 2020

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SHE HUSTLES HUSTLES TALKS TALKS }} {{ SHE “Whether you are a beginner or intermediate you will find something here to get excited about. Art has the ability to lift our spirits.”

I LOVE to paint pet portraits and find myself even attaching to them by the time I complete the painting. 76

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My fees depend on the size and medium but usually runs around $200 – $400.

Call/text/email me 585-727-4574 with questions. lsbrogan@rochester. rr.com


studio

HOPE IN ART * TEACHING ART STUDIO & GALLERY * PAINT PARTIES (PRIVATE) * PAINT N’ SIPS (MONTHLY) AT THE STUDIO * ART/YOGA WORKSHOPS * PET PORTAITURE 144 MILL STREET , CDGA NY 14424 I WWW.HOPEINARTSTUDIO.COM WWW.PINTEREST.COM/LBROGAN2/PAINT-NIGHT-IDEAS I LSBROGAN@ROCHESTER.RR.COM HTTPS://WWW.FACEBOOK.COM/HOPEINARTSTUDIO/


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WOODWARD FLOORING BY DANIELA WOODWARD

My name is Daniela Woodward and I am a Bolivian wife, mother and owner of Woodward Floor here in Rochester. I was very fortunate to grow in a family of strong women. Starting with my grandmother who made her living of being a dressmaker in a third world country to my mother who traveled more than four thousand miles away from home to give me and my siblings a better future.

My husband and I started off by remodeling one room in our starter home. We liked it so much, we did all three bedrooms, the kitchen, the bathroom and living room. We had little to no money so we did the installation ourselves learning in the way all the variety of materials out there. The next house we moved into had a

A great man once said: “If a woman is called to be a street sweeper, she should sweep streets even as Frida painted, or Beethoven composed music, or Shakespeare wrote poetry. She should sweep the streets so well; so that all the hosts of heaven and earth will pause to say: here lived a great street sweeper who did her job well.” Before I am an entrepreneur, I am a mother and a wife because being that person is what determined my goal to build this company. From having to support myself, and my family, to take care of my customers by giving them a product that can forever impact their life and the home they are building. This is why Woodward Floors was born, to bring comfort to homes starting at every step of the way.

spare bedroom that we turned into a nursery for our first kids that were due. (twin boys!), because thinking about the future, we wanted to give our kids a comfortable place where they will take their first steps. We then spread to every other room in the house, putting down the floor ourselves and learning all the techniques needed for each different

room and circumstance. Of course also learning how to handle different materials like the ones that we offer, like engineered hardwood, premium flooring and luxury vinyl plank. We have moved several times since. Each time we moved into a house, we redid the floors leaving them better than how we found them. It has been very satisfying knowing that we left a little bit of ourselves in each house that made it “home” for us in the time being. Word got out that we did floors and since our initial beginnings we have installed countless floors. Every time bringing comfort to people’s homes and hearing how much they love the final product because it makes the room looks bigger, or getting a floor that is besides beautiful, easy to clean. And the most special one to me, that people feel like they are in a new home because they are joyfull to walk barefoot in their own home feeling comfortable. Our mission is to never be lacking in zeal, but keep our spiritual fervor serving. That way we can offer our service to everyone out there who is in need of a new floor, that important surface that builds up our confidence.


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{ SHE HUSTLES TALKS } “Before I am an entrepreneur, I am a mother and a wife because being that person is what determined my goal to build this company.”

I myself have experienced the feeling of having a new floor, and I am not going to lie, that when it is something you have been missing for a long time, you know immediately what feels right.

and that they needed, exceeding the home owner’s expectations. But also, walking people thought out the journey of finding the right floor that suits them. The one that I call it “the perfect match”.

From all the different homes we have put floor, can’t help but smile at the fact that people loved the end product. In each and every single one of them, people are so thankful because Woodward Floor has given them the floor they expected

Woodward Floors offers engineered hardwood, premium flooring and luxury vinyl planking for installation with only making a free estimate appointment where we can get to meet you and learn your needs. We can also help you find

the best prices for your budget. Just let us know and we will be there to guide you every step of the journey of what is to get a new floor in the home you love. Not just for the change, but for the importance of getting comfort at your step, in the sacred place that it is your home. We were called to floors and we are humbled and bestowed at the opportunity to serve your family. ROCHESTER WOMAN ONLINE :: EMPOWERMENT EDITION 2020

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NEED PUBLICITY/ PRESS/ VIDEOGRAPHY/ PHOTOGRAPHY FOR YOUR EVENT ? EMAIL VISIONARYMINDSNY@GMAIL.COM


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BEAUTY FOR ASHES BY TAMESHA BECKFORD I PHOTOS BY MICHAEL THAXTON

It says in Isaiah 61:3 “To appoint unto them that mourn in Zion, to give them beauty for ashes, the oil of joy for mourning, the garment of praise for the spirit of heaviness, that they might be called trees of righteousness, the planting of the Lord that he may be glorified.”

suicide attempts, living the life of a prostitute, figting with anxiety, depression low-self esteem during my teenage years going into adulthood. It seemed like ashes upon ashes. I got married at 22 was divorced by 29. I thought my marriage was the

I have come across this scripture so many times, but I didn’t have a clue what it meant. However little did I know not only would I understand this scripture, It would be my life story, and oh boy what a story it is! I lived in Rochester, New York for 27years. My parents moved me up here from the Bronx , New York I really had no clue what this city had in store for me or what plans God had for me living here. I was about to soon find out. I grew up in a very loud household. I am the second oldest of 8 siblings. I felt more like the red-headed step child then the second oldest lol! Now I know the scripture states beauty for ashes, however I was yet to experience the beauty of everything that I had gone through, yet and still God is good! I used to be ashamed of everything I had gone through, from being molested at the age of 13, having to live with the pain, guilt and fear right in my own home, surviving 3

me the strength I needed to walk away from it all. And boy does he answer prayer! I struggled with the idea of being a single mother, since I grew up in a two-parent home. But no matter how hard the struggle I knew I had to trust God with this new journey. I’m telling you there were days when I didn’t think I had it in me to raise 5 children on my own and keep a sober mind. But the bible says that God’s strength is made perfect through our weaknesses. And I had rely on his everlasting arms for strength, his grace and mercy to help me through what I would call a tough, yet rewarding journey. I was still struggling with what my purpose in life was though. I struggled with bitterness, unforgiveness and regret for many years. Then one fine Sunday morning in 2016 I was invited to visit another church during the alter call was made, I decided to raise my white flag in surrender to the Lord and laid every problem in my heart that I was holding onto for such a long time. That was the day that I traded in my will for God’s will. That’s it!

beginning of my “beauty” portion of the scripture, however that beauty was short lived. Dealing with physical, mental & emotional abuse for most of the marriage, I finally asked God to give

Once I surrendered my will in exchange for his will, that was then and only then he exchange my garment of mourning and give me a garment of praise. In 2018 the Lord blessed me to start my first ministry called “Wake up and Live Ministries” which ROCHESTER WOMAN ONLINE :: EMPOWERMENT EDITION 2020

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SHE HUSTLES HUSTLES TALKS TALKS }} {{ SHE “In 2018 the Lord blessed me to start my first ministry called “Wake up and Live Ministries” which airs each week on Facebook.”

which airs each week on Facebook. Then in 2019 the Lord blessed me to host my first women’s conference. I was and still am so amazed how God chooses to use me each and every time despite my past! How great is our God! Today God blesses me to share my testimony with other women. I share 90

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my story proudly, I’m finally free! Free of the guilt and shame of my past, no longer do I have to pretend to be happy, a smile on the outside but hurting and broken on the inside. He’s made me whole now and in that I can rejoice! Now not only do I understand this scripture, I am actually living it, he’s given me a garment of praise, he’s poured the

oil of joy over me in exchange for my mourning and he’s given me beauty for ashes. God will get the glory out of my story, and I plan on sharing my story with the world!


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HEIDI CARSON Heidi Carson is the founder of Rochester, NY based organizational learning business called Orglearn. Orglearn is an organization that reflects Carson’s background and philosophy. She developed a source for small to large sized business owners to obtain valuable resources, education, something that is very close to Carson’s heart. The organization is an enterprise that features and celebrates diversity and the unique abilities that employees bring to the table. We assist these innovative business owners by contributing to their growth and added success while teaching skills that transfer immediately. In addition, Ms. Carson’s thirst for learning, unwavering persistence and determination laid the foundation for the organization. Her strength and conviction were formed, in part, by the struggle she endured when beginning her own education. She learned from that experience and executes what she learned every day. Carson turns meaningful training ideas into products.... like the game Divein, which is intended to enhance relationships by way of connection and mindful philosophies (excellent for organizations, families, and individuals). Education is something that Ms. Carson is very passionate about as well, she also learned early on that running a business is multifaceted. Many owners do not realize the extent of the responsibilities necessary to lead and operate a business. Hence, she imparts practical application. It is extremely prudent to hire and

maintain an index of highly skilled individuals who contribute to your company as well as the organizations that we serve. Armed with a fierce passion for learning, Heidi Carson’s journey to Orglearn is packed with experience and a true pulse on how people learn best. “I always had an idea that I wanted to be in the

educational field, but I was not sure how the landscape of this journey would flush out. I discovered organizational training and felt that with my education and experience, this was a natural fit for me, “says Carson. Carson has a successful track record of delivering unique and meaningful educational initiatives that prove to be extremely valuable not only to the

organization but to the employee as well. Organizations are concerned about ROI and we make sure to ensure that the organizations see a return on their training and development. Carson started from humble beginnings back in 2008 when the economy has just hit bottom. “I had a lucrative consulting contract with RGH that was due to end. I had nothing else lined up due to the volatile economic scene and I was scared beyond belief. I started cold calling companies and built my client portfolio, one after another”. Part of Carson’s back story is that she had thoughts of going to Smith college for her MS degree when her mother became ill. “I had applied to several MS programs around the country, University of Rochester was one of several schools that I had been accepted into. I decided on U of R due to the grave situation with my mother. Fighting through tough situations imparts a mindset that anything is possible in life. I try to incorporate this philosophy into workforce trainings. Think about the average workplace environment. You are bringing these different people together with various worldviews and life experiences. You place them into an environment and say, now work nice, produce and have no conflict. This is where organizational learning/ training comes into play. A great part of the human condition is that conflict is inevitable and can be very positive if dealt with in appropriate ways.”

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SHE HUSTLES HUSTLES TALKS TALKS }} {{ SHE “Heidi Carson’s company, Orglearn is a WBE (women business enterprise) certified by New York State. The company is a full-service organizational learning business that offers unique and meaningful learning experiences.”

Carson is also called upon to coach those in leadership roles that need some skill-set enhancement or employees that are being groomed for advancement. In addition, I have dealt with everything from discrimination issues to workplace violence issues. I get very concerned when organizations cease or decrease their training dollars and initiatives. You cannot expect people to grow and flourish with no workforce development. Carson likes to go beyond workplace learning endeavors and impart skills that teach work-life balance. “There are so many lines that get crossed between work and our personal life,” said Carson. 94

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Heidi Carson’s company, Orglearn is a WBE (women business enterprise) certified by New York State. The company is a full-service organizational learning business that offers unique and meaningful learning experiences. Heidi Carson often utilizes blended learning solutions that go beyond mixing training delivery modalities. Our blended learning solutions include a mix of ILT (delivered by a subject matter expert trainer in a synchronous or asynchronous (self-paced), learning delivery format) and web technologies. We often include follow-up coaching to ensure participants retain and apply the

knowledge and skills delivered during the learning process. Carson has developed over 175 live trainings and 250 online webinars designed for live facilitation as well as self-directed learning. In addition, she has developed curriculum for organizations to launch at their leisure with their own branding. Client list includes: Utilities, Firestone, New York State, Manufacturing, healthcare, hospitality, Federal Gov’t.


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195 PARRISH ST, SUITE 260 I CANANDAIGUA, NY 14 96

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4424 I PHONE: 585-905-3414 I FAX: 585-394-5942


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VEGA FAMILY CHIROPRACTIC BY DR. YASELLYN DIAZ-VEGA

Dr. Yasellyn Diaz-Vega is a partner owner and chiropractor at Rochester Chiropractic Clinic also known as Vega Family Chiropractic. Dr. Diaz-Vega was born and raised in Puerto Rico and did her undergraduate studies in the University of Puerto Rico in San Juan. She later decided to continue graduate school and advanced her education at the New York Chiropractic College in Seneca Falls. Since 2001, she has lived in this area and loved the farm lands such as the ones she was raised in Puerto Rico.

chiropractors and some of the few Spanish speaking chiropractors in this area.”. Dr. Diaz- Vega has received a Certification by the Academy Council of Chiropractic Pediatrics (CACCP). This Certification is a comprehensive program that enhances the practitioners adjusting techniques, evaluation, assessment of different stages of development from pregnancy, birth, infancy

In 2004, during and after her chiropractic internship in Buffalo, NY she was hired temporarily with her now husband Dr. Edwin Vega Jr. at a chiropractic practice. “After graduation, the doctor we were working for was convinced that we had all the skills necessary to establish our own practice, and so we did in September 2004 and opened our office doors to serve the Rochester Community” says Dr. Diaz-Vega. “Edwin was born and raise here and most of his family was here, so it made lot of sense for us to start here and after looking at all our options, we decided to establish our own roots here. It has been such as enriching and learning process. At the time when we opened in 2004, I only knew of a handful of women chiropractors in the area and most worked with other larger chiropractic office groups. Now the amount of women chiropractors has grown but in terms of diversity we were and still are -15 years later, the only Latino 98

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throughout childhood. Dr. Diaz-Vega has also further her education in the fields of neurodevelopmental childhood conditions such as ADHD, Autism, Developmental Delays, Sensory Processing Disorders and more. She has a special interest in Women Health which is why she has taken also further education on Fertility, Prenatal Health, Functional Nutrition and Hormone Health. She is currently one of the very few

chiropractors in this area that hold this advance specialization with a Certification Program from the Academy of Chiropractic Family Practice. “In our office we have a focus of seeing families, mom, dad and children. Since here they can receive a specialized care from prenatal care all they way until adulthood, they feel very comfortable coming in knowing that they will receive care that is designed for all ages- of their family members.” A circumstance that I faced that changed my live was in 2011-12, within 6 months I had 2 miscarriages that completely changed the way I saw health, women bodies and our health. It was a very painful experience. I never felt so out of control, vulnerable and sad all at the same time. I had to search deep in me to look for answers and eventually knew who I was meant to be and who I was meant to serve. I was already in the “right” path, but that experience helped me anchor my desire much further, it helped me see how much stress as it comes in different forms: physical, emotional and chemically can impact anyone, even when we are already practicing good healthy habits. This experience anchored even more my passion to serve women in our community and their families. It helped me realized that my passion and mission to serve women was stronger than my desire to please or be agreeable by others. I had understood that in order to make the change and fulfill my mission I had to be different and execute differently.


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SHE HUSTLES HUSTLES TALKS TALKS }} {{ SHE “When Dr. Diaz-Vega is outside of her office, she enjoys spending time with her family of 6, exercising, going for walks, reading, traveling, and personal and professional growth activities.”

We had committed ourselves to bring long lasting solutions to our patients and experiences that will last a life time not only related to their care, but also to the community we wanted to create in our office to continue to promote health. WE strongly believe that every human, child, man and woman in this world should get the opportunity to have a healthy nervous system through specific chiropractic care. “We have found that many families feel comfortable with us, because they find: a lot of education, a judgement free-zone, empowering and supporting environment”. Our office also offers workshops of different topics from nutrition, to how to care for your pelvic floor, neurodevelopmental disabilities, women health, general spinal health and more. We also have relationships with many other providers in our area from: massage therapists, physical therapists, mental health counseling, OB/gyn, doulas, lactation consultants, nutritionists, speech pathologists, occupational therapists and more that we have made available to our practice members to enhance their health. Drs. Diaz-Vega and Dr. Vega have a wealth of experience and are committed and passionate in delivering the most up to date, research -based services. For 15 years they have been helping the Rochester Community in getting not only relieve from common ailments such as headaches, neck pain, disc herniations, back pain, radiculopathy but also in a more specialized cases. Our main approach is to enhance the function of the nervous system by looking at the brain and spine and decreasing or removing 102

any interference, pressure, inflammation in the spine that can place extra stress on those nerves that come out of the spine and travel throughtout the body to deliver information from the brain into every cell in our bodies and then backwards from our cells into our brain. Our brains along with our bodies should have the ability to react and adapt pending on the changes on the internal or external environment. But this is much difficult if the communication of our brain and body is interrupted at the spine level where there might be pressure, compression or inflammation into the nerves that then reduces the information designed to be going from the brain into the rest of the body decreasing then the body ability to function. Our office is highly designed with the latest equipment to find, analyze and correct those areas that we may find that are interfering with your nervous system, weather you are a newborn, child, or adult we can do that due to our training and expertise. Living in the world we are living in, especially under the health pandemic of the COVID-19, most of us are under a tremendous amount of stress. Our bodies are working 24/7 tirelessly to fulfill the constant high demand of not only nourishing our bodies but not also processing all the mental and physical changes that come from being under stress. Cortisol and adrenaline levels increases, we increase our heart and respiration rates, this increasing blood pressure, decreasing of digestion which we can start then suffering from malabsorption, food sensitivities or indigestion problems, headaches due to the muscle tensions and aches, insomnia, depression, anxiety, anger, mood swings, changes in eating habits, hormones imbalances

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amongst others. These all have the potential of improving once we improve the nervous system through chiropractic care. There is research that demonstrate how chiropractic care can enhance the body’s ability to heal itself and improve the overall immune and nervous system function. Specially more in populations that are already at a vulnerable stage due to changes in their bodies such as during pregnancy and childhood which are population Dr. Diaz-Vega specializes in serving. Dr. Diaz- Vega has a community group who meets once a month designed to empower, support and discuss health topics just for women. We also have a VIP group to answer questions and provide tons of valuable information along with video interviews with other professionals that serve women in our community .(https://www.facebook. com/groups/2441329862629586/about/) Dr. Diaz-Vega serves as a board member of the Rochester Area Birth Network. In 2018, both Dr. Diaz-Vega and Dr. Vega received the Healthcare Service Community Award from the Latino Rotary Club for using their medical knowledge to serve the community. She is also an active member of the International Chiropractic Pediatric Association. When Dr. Diaz-Vega is outside of her office, she enjoys spending time with her family of 6, exercising, going for walks, reading, traveling, and personal and professional growth activities.


WellTrail has been proudly serving our Western, Upstate and Central NY communities since 2008, providing health and injury consulting services, programming and training opportunities to companies and organizations throughout the region. Now more than ever, supporting our local community and the amazing individuals who call this their home is our number one commitment. If we can support you or your organization during this difficult time, or beyond, please let us know. Our doors and hearts are open and we stand ready to assist now or whenever your doors may reopen for business. Stay safe, stay healthy, and keep pursuing your Healthy U. Kelli LaPage, Founder and CEO


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PINOT’S PALETTE Josie has had a passion for customer service since a young age. Her father, mother and siblings emigrated here in 1966 from Italy for a better life for their family. He instilled many morals and values into his children including a passion for customer service. Josie is a first-generation Italian-American, born and raised in Rochester, NY. Josie has lived in Rochester her whole life and is a mother of 2 beautiful daughters, a grandmother to one and another one is on the way. She has worked in customer service since she was 15 years old and has grown in this field. As a female entrepreneur, Josie has been involved with direct sales companies, managed local business, and owned and operated a local bar. She absolutely loves working with people and will continue to do so because it is what she is most passionate about. She enjoys making people smile and loves the feeling of making them happy. After working with another local paint & sip company Josie and her business partner realized they loved the customer service aspect of it and decided to venture on their own to open their own franchise. This passion and desire led her to continue working in the paint and sip industry by owning and operating Pinot’s Palette in Greece, NY. Pinot’s Palette is in the DIY and Paint 106

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& Sip Industry, located in the Town of Greece, where her and her business partner have lived their entire lives. The studio is located in the Erie Canal Commons plaza on Ridgeway near Long Pond Road. It has two enormous party rooms as well as the infamous backlight room, where customers can paint start to finish in the backlight

palettes, bags, pre-cut shapes, wine glasses, and wine bottles. Also the artists will teach hand-made crafty items like; chunky blankets, hats, scarves and macramé planters. They use an assortment of techniques of painting including marble art, paint pouring, splatter paint, and traditional acrylic painting.

with fluorescent acrylic paint. Their core values consist of creating wonderful family-inspired experiences while making lasting memories that their customers enjoy.

Pinot’s Palette offers public classes, birthday parties and private events at its location as well as providing an opportunity to do mobile and off-site events with other business and organizations. Private parties or events are able to have a customized painting that is specific to their organization as well as the option to choose a painting from the entire Pinot’s Palette gallery. Pinot’s Palette offer monthly fundraisers where Josie gives back 50% of the gross sales to the charity hosting the event. Josie and her staff have worked with the following organizations thus far; Rescued Treasures, Pancreatic Cancer Center, Parkinson Foundation, DAV, Stop The 22 A Day, Verona Animal Society, Laurel House, Brindle Posse Rescue and Mended Little Hearts.

Their artists guide their customers with step-by-step instruction to create their very own masterpiece. The products and services consist of acrylic painting on; variety of canvas sizes, wood boards/

Pinot’s Palette has created a customer rewards program that is top notch and that to Josie and her business partner is very important. The program is named Pinot’s Perks and it allows guests to earn


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SHE HUSTLES HUSTLES TALKS TALKS }} {{ SHE “We go over and above to make sure our guest are happy with their completed masterpiece and offer them to attend a free one on one session with an artist if they are not happy.”

earn “cork points” towards future classes where eventually they will earn a free class, as well as receiving points for a percentage off a future class. This is one of the reasons Josie knew she had made the right decision, it is all about keeping our customers happy and making them want to return for another fun night out! Josie believes their customer service is top notch at Pinot’s Palette. Josie says, “We go over and above to make sure our guest are happy with their completed masterpiece and offer them 110

to attend a free one on one session with an artist if they are not happy. But let me just say, that we have never had to set up an appointment for a customer because we make sure they are 1000% pleased when they leave. That is what keeps them coming back!” Josie is very proactive and works hard to follow up with customers because she believes that no one should have to wait for a call or an email. Josie prides herself on following up with customers that attended her studio and makes sure to respond personally by thanking them

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on their reviews and encouraging them to come back again soon. Her reviews are outstanding and that is how Josie likes to keep it. As the artist’s say, “This is FUN art, NOT fine art!” and Josie makes sure that her customers leave with a smile and a painting they love. Josie and her staff are friendly, energetic, entertaining and everyone that walks through our door is considered family. Josie wants customers to feel right at home when they walk in and she strives for it every day.


Art Supplies Included

PAINT. DRINK. HAVE FUN. Join us for an evening of friends, fun and painting! Whether you want to destress, connect with PINOTSfriends, or make new ones, we provide everything you need for a great night out. From the seasoned painter to the newbie, these painting classes have something for everyone!

Birthdays

Date Night

Just for fun

2544 B Ridgeway Avenue Rochester, NY 14626 585.730.5147 rochester@pinotspalette.com www.pinotspalette.com/rochester


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HAIR BY CASSIE BY CASSANDRA BARTOSCH

My name is Cassandra Bartosch with @hairbycassandramarie and I have been a hairstylist in Rochester, NY for the past 9 years and counting. I was born and raised in Brockport and have always been drawn back to this city. As I’ve gotten older I have grown a huge appreciation for the beauty of this city and everything it has to offer. Now that I have a little family of my own that gets to grow up here, like I did, I hope to show them all the things that have brought me joy in Rochester.

to have gotten to the place I am. I found a career at a young age that I can honestly say I have immense passion for. The beauty industry has brought so much joy and constant challenges to better myself. I owe so much to this industry.

I have been fortunate enough to have been recognized for my work on multiple platforms thus far. Each time your work gets recognized, it fuels even more passion and drive to keep getting better. My goals for myself and my craft only keep getting higher and higher by the day. One of my greatest (and most challenging) qualities is I always want more for myself and I can’t ever just be “ok” at something. My clients appreciate this because every time I get to work with them I am trying to outdo my last time, making their hair better and better every time they see me.

I have two boys that give me every reason in the world to be the best that I can be. Thatcher and Lawson have brought me so much growth in my life. Being a young single mother, they have tested me in every way possible, and have helped me grow into the woman I am today. Patience, strength, vulnerability, self-reflection and so much laughter make up my daily life and I’m so lucky for that. There are hard days (a lot of hard days) but this life that I have created here in Rochester has become my dream life. I think the one thing people always look for in life is balance. Balance is something I have strived to find for years and will constantly work toward. Balancing work and family life takes a lot of effort but I am grateful

niche in low maintenance hair color styles such as balayage, colormelts, and grey blending vs. grey coverage. While my natural talent has brought me into these styles, I also fully enjoy haircuts for all lengths and styles, bridal and formal hairstyling, and fashion colors. The main goal of low maintenance hair is that no matter how long you go between appointments, you will continue to get compliments and have confidence the entire time, even until you’re back in my chair.

Being a hairstylist is an absolute dream. I graduated from Shear Ego Beauty School in 2011 and have been addicted to learning everything I can in the beauty industry ever since. Working in Rochester, I have developed my

This industry is so exciting to me because it is constantly evolving and the education is abundant at all times. My love for education and growth has always been a top priority, and this world I’ve chosen to be a part

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SHE HUSTLES HUSTLES TALKS TALKS }} {{ SHE “This industry is so exciting to me because it is constantly evolving and the education is abundant at all times.”

My clients are always more than “clients” to me. They become friends and family. They know about my crazy kids and I know about their loved ones. My chair is like a world of its own. We share things there that keep us connected as humans, things we don’t even say to our family, but we share with each other and bring those walls down. That is almost more gratifying to me than the finished product of beautiful hair; the comfort, 114

the openness we share and this amazing dynamic we get to create while creating beautiful wearable art. There are so many amazing and exciting things coming up this year and I’m excited to share them all with you. I can’t wait to meet more of you in this beautiful city and share with you everything I am about.

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Remember where you are and how you’ve always dreamed of being here, appreciate it, now make the next highest goal and keep pushing. Can’t wait to meet you!


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PINOTS

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{ WOMEN WHO INSPIRE }

HOMELESSNESS IN ROCHESTER BY MARY LUPIEN

Last Sunday Governor Andrew Cuomo issued the New York State On Pause order, shutting down all non-essential businesses and instituting Social Distancing. Pause stands for Policies that Assure the Uniform Safety of Everyone. Everyone, used in this context, must by necessity mean everyone. It cannot be taken to mean, everyone we find relevant. The most vulnerable among us, the homeless, have not been addressed adequately in this declaration. These measures are critical to the survival of the citizens of our state and we cannot pretend that the homeless are not a part of our state, and potential victims of the current pandemic. Most of us can follow the guidelines of Social Distancing when away from our homes. For those without homes, Social Distancing becomes immeasurably more difficult. They are crammed into crowded shelters at night and left to roam the streets during the day. With businesses and libraries closed there is nowhere for them to go. Shelters are doing the best they can. They have policies in place to check temperatures and numbers to call if residents appear symptomatic. They have been asked to keep beds three feet apart and have guests sleep head to toe to increase the distance between them. But potential transmissions are increased by the reality

of shared bathrooms, dormitories and dining areas, as well as working with skeleton crews. Keeping their guests safe from infection is worse than difficult, it is nearly impossible. Those who have taken it upon themselves to help the homeless are finding it an insurmountable task to maintain Social Distancing in crowded shelters. Michael

Gil, an advocate for the Peace Village Homeless Encampment, said this. “The people out on the street are not fully aware of the severity of the pandemic. And there are too few examples still of the best practices for people in designated essential businesses. I see very few people wearing masks and very little adherence to proper distancing. The cost in dollars

to the public to quarantine any infected homeless person is considerable, and the cost in lives and suffering is heartbreaking. Most victims of homelessness have trust issues with authority. They often feel threatened when dealing with police or social workers. Few will voluntarily seek help until their symptoms force them to seek medical attention, some not even then. For this reason alone it is inevitable that their rate of infection will soar if we simply accept the status quo of the homeless community. It is critical that steps are taken immediately to remove them from an environment which makes it nearly certain that they will eventually be exposed to the Coronaviris and once infected, spread it to others. Quite often the homeless interact with different people every day. Keeping them well protects all of us. Rather than crowded shelters, empty hotel rooms should be procured to give them a safe space. Current shelter conditions violate the policy of groups larger than ten people congregating together. The homeless literally have no choice but to put themselves in a position which the CDC says constitutes a major risk of infection. By their very nature, most shelters violate the policies put in place to minimize the transmission of contagious diseases, and they should ROCHESTER WOMAN ONLINE :: EMPOWERMENT EDITION 2020

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{ WOMEN WHO INSPIRE }

“Most victims of homelessness have trust issues with authority. They often feel threatened when them to seek medical attention, some not even then. For this reason alone it is inevitable that

be closed or forced to limit numbers of occupants to allow compliance with safe distancing protocols. They should also allow twenty four hour access. We must shelter the homeless in ways that follow the guidelines established to slow the transmission rate between members of the community. Renting unused hotel space will cost less than the amount given to most Americans for unemployment compensation. It will be a lifeline for the hotels whose cash flow has been decimated by stay at home orders and it will save the lives of hundreds, possibly thousands of homeless and others who might come in contact with them. Because of the level of coordination this will require between city, county, and state agencies as well as hotel operators and non-profit housing providers, any time wasted at the beginning of this endeavor will translate into loss of life in the coming weeks and months. Lessons learned by implementing this policy would serve as a model for areas not yet experiencing the crisis levels seen here, enabling them to save even more lives. St. Josephs Hospitality House serves the community by providing hospitality and meals during the day and winter shelter at night. Jasmin Reggler, House Coordinator at St. Joseph’s House of Hospitality summed up the situation perfectly. 124

“Why are we waiting for the people in shelters to become symptomatic before they are moved to hotels? By the time someone shows symptoms they could have exposed others in the shelter. Also, people don’t always come forward to say they aren’t feeling well and I doubt shelters have the capacity to do wellness checks every day on folks staying in shelters. We are told to social distance and not be in

gatherings of more than ten people. Many shelters in Rochester are already beyond that. Is that not reason enough to start placing people in hotels before they start showing symptoms. This effort will reduce numbers in already crowded shelters and begin to slow the spread of this virus.” Inherent in making plans for when this

ROCHESTER WOMAN ONLINE :: EMPOWERMENT EDITION 2020

crisis passes, is the acknowledgment between all of us that it will pass and that we will have learned from it. One of the most important lessons we need to learn is that housing the homeless and preventing future homelessness should be an immediate priority for the safety and security of the victims of this tragic shortcoming our society has allowed to happen. The response to the Coronavirus pandemic has shown us the need and the ability of individuals and officials at every level of government to work together to make sweeping changes in situations we never imagined we would face. While our immediate focus must be helping as many people as possible survive the unfolding threat, we will have the opportunity after we have overcome this disease to reexamine the systemic failures it has exposed. We must use the things we have learned to reorient government to the cause of providing the best possible life to the most possible members of society. We will have the best opportunity of the last seventy five years to shape the future of America into one where the needs of every citizen share equal importance in the eyes of those we elect to govern us.


{ WOMEN WHO INSPIRE }

n dealing with police or social workers. Few will voluntarily seek help until their symptoms force their rate of infection will soar if we simply accept the status quo of the homeless community.�

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{ VISIBLE MAN }

SUICIDE ADVOCACY FOR MEN BY JEFFREY HOFFMAN

Monroe County lost 189 men to suicide between 2015 and 2017 -- a staggering loss of life, stability, and normalcy in those left behind (source). Each man’s sudden absence rips the fabric that wrapped their children, spouse, siblings, and parents in the safety of knowing they would be here tomorrow and leaves unanswered questions, notably Why? And What could I have done to prevent this? Women have higher rates of diagnosed depression (source), are more likely than men to seek help from primary care providers for mental health (source), and utilize non-suicidal self-injury (i.e. cutting) three times more often than men (source) -- suggesting that women, not men, would die by suicide more often. Indeed, women attempt suicide 1.2 times more often than men (source), so it is surprising to learn that men die by suicide four times more often than women (source). This statistic highlights that men’s mental health needs advocacy, attention, and change to save the lives of those men who are important to all of us. Visible Man is a men’s suicide prevention advocacy group in Rochester, NY, founded by Jeffrey Hoffman in 2018 as a result of his experiences battling depression and suicidality during divorce and loss. The name Visible Man was chosen to counter the feeling of being expendable and invisible -- a feeling experienced by most providers, partners, and parents at some point, whether they are a man or a woman. Visible Man aims to address this feeling of invisibility in men by connecting men who share that feeling, 128

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training these men in self improvement practices in a peer setting, and providing a visible network of advocates for men’s mental health that serve as a fabric to connect those in need with local mental health providers. In other words, to address male suicide, we must first acknowledge that suicide looks different in men and women, empower our community to support these men in their journey, and reduce men’s reluctance to seek the advice of a trained mental health professional.

“I’m a woman - so I’m not a part of men’s mental health” is commonly heard when discussing Visible Man. But women are critical to men’s mental health. Privately, men rely on the safety and privacy of their intimate relationships with female partners for talking about emotional difficulties, while publicly maintaining an image of traditional masculinity (source). Ivana Colangelo, a Rochester-based Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist (LMFT), notes that “men tend to feel more comfortable sharing their honest and vulnerable thoughts with me

one-on-one, rather than in sessions with their partner present. Often it’s because of a fear that they will be perceived by their female partner as “weak” or “needy” or “unmanly” in some way, which would subsequently result in rejection. So I work with them on these beliefs so that they can let go of this walled off and defensive stance in couples therapy and instead share of themselves with their partner the same way they do with me in individual sessions.” This has been seen at Visible Man meetings (held once monthly at ROCovery Fitness) where patterns in openness were observed to be different among male-only groups compared to groups where women were present. And with 51% of Visible Man’s social media followers on Instagram and Facebook being women, it is clear that women are interested in men’s mental health. So the question arises, what can women do to help men’s mental health? ● Listen well: Recognize that a man’s choice to vulnerably discuss feelings directly challenges his need to project an image of strength and autonomy. As noted earlier, men do not want to appear weak, needy, or unmanly - and committing to create a discussion environment that welcomes the unconditional acceptance of feelings - without interrupting, fixing, or injecting small micro-aggressions - creates a safer place to share. The American Foundation for Suicide Prevention (AFSP) points out that “a person may be considering suicide include talking about killing themselves, feeling hopeless, having no reason to live, being a burden to others, feeling trapped, or unbearable pain.”


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DIY

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{ VISIBLE MAN } } { SHIFT+CONTROL “I’m a woman - so I’m not a part of men’s mental health” is commonly heard when discussing Visible Man. But women are critical to men’s mental health.”

● Observe: Note any changes in behavior that could be early indicators of changes in his mental health that even he may not be aware of. For example, increases in alcohol consumption, isolating from his family and friends, and changes in sleep patterns. As someone close to them, you may notice changes in subtleties like changes in texting frequency or avoidant behaviors that are uncharacteristic of his typical life. AFSP further describes “behaviors that may signal risk include increased use of alcohol or drugs, looking for a way to end their lives (such as searching online for method), withdrawing from activities, isolating from family and friends, sleeping too much or too little, visiting or calling people to say goodbye, giving away prized possessions, aggression, and fatigue.” The COVID-19 pandemic creates conditions

known to precede increases in suicide rates, such as social isoation (caused by necessary social distancing), job loss, and frighteningly, the potential for death of a loved one. The psychological impact will be far-reaching and as noted in a recent Visible Man blog post, these factors inject unprecedented levels of change that are known to be risk factors for suicide. These risk factors are noted by AFSP:

such as harassment, bullying, relationship problems or unemployment, stressful life events, like rejection, divorce, financial crisis, other life transitions or loss, exposure to another person’s suicide, or to graphic or sensationalized accounts of suicide.

● Health Factors: Mental health conditions (Depression, substance use problems, bipolar disorder, schizophrenia, personality traits of aggression, mood changes and poor relationships, conduct and anxiety disorder), serious physical health conditions including pain, and traumatic brain injury.

If you feel that someone you know is suicidal, call the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 800-273-8255, 211 (for more information about local resources in Monroe County), text anything to 741741 to text with a trained crisis counselor, or dial 911 if it is an urgent emergency.

● Historical: Previous suicide attempts, family history of suicide, childhood abuse, neglect or trauma

● Environmental: Access to lethal means including firearms and drugs, prolonged stress, ROCHESTER WOMAN ONLINE :: EMPOWERMENT EDITION 2020

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{ KARMA SPEAKS }

PENCILED IN BY DENISE “KARMA” CLIFFORD

There’s a close circle of girlfriends friends whom I have on a group text chat. It’s been this way for some time. We send jokes, gifs, we text our problems, and vent to one another like it’s our religious duty.

I’ve seen grow up written on dates. I’ve seen our names and hearts and smiley faces penciled in for camping trips and coffees. I stood there recognizing the impact and importance of these five women in my life.

We aren’t looking to fix what’s wrong, but we’re there for support. Like once two months ago I was hit with a wave of depression that came on like a swarm of locusts devouring crops, I didn’t tell them they just knew.

This circle is thick with personality,

These girls reminded me of my purpose. Showed up and didn’t let me ride the wave shut out from the world. Where depression spreads like moss on a dead tree. “Girls, it’s come to my attention that you and your families have been penciled into my life for 16 years,” was a recent text that came through one morning. One of the five I have in my text group shared through tears, and snapshots of her paperwork she is finally decluttering. Kayla owns and operates a daycare, in fact it’s how we met. She’s got a huge heart and wears it on her sleeve. She bends over backwards to make kids feel welcomed and wanted. She’s my friend who would give you her cheeseburger, even if she hasn’t eaten in five days. I looked at some of the pics she was sending, and saw names of the kids 134

opinions and experience. I came home the other day and found flowers on my front porch. No note, no explanation, just beautiful flowers left to make me smile. The rest of my circle received them too. Diana wanted to share these flowers with us all, to make sure we had something to brighten our day with. That pretty much sums up my friend Diana, she’s

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quiet, determined and works to make your life better from afar. She doesn’t look for recognition or want praise. She just wants to make sure you feel special. I love that about her. We text on the daily, sometimes we send jokes and laugh, other times we ask each other how we have managed this life so far. There’s things that happen and have no words, and sometimes you want to stop and rewind. But you can’t, so you make sure you’re there. For the years, the emotions, the times you have nothing besides just being there. My friend Gina is the strongest woman I know. It isn’t by choice, she’s had to be present in life and exist through things no mother should ever have to. She lives her life too, for others. Selfless and loyal. Just don’t piss her off, because she would have no problem unleashing her fury on those who hurt her or the ones she loves. There’s also the friend who may show up late, talk too loud and say the honest to god’s truth, even when those things would be best left unsaid. Loressa gives it to you straight whether or not you even asked. Don’t worry about the outfit you’re wearing or how your hair looks, because if your hanging around her, she will let you know. She is the fashion police and


{{ SHIFT+CONTROL KARMA SPEAKS }}

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{ KARMA SPEAKS } “ Does anyone want to meet at the high school, sit in our cars in a circle, six feet away from each other and have coffee together? I nearly screamed YES! Into the phone.”

will send you back inside to fix your face, before being caught dead with you looking like that. She’s blunt, little and loud, but this girl would walk on shards of glass if you were on the other side, and needed her there. Then there’s the anchor. The one that if she wasn’t so damn persistent, my entire life would not be the same. You see almost 16 years ago I was fat, the new kid in town, just had a baby and knew nearly no one. I was isolated and thought that was ok. I didn’t need anyone and no one needed me. Boy was I wrong. I met Kristina here at the local gym when I decided to join a class she was teaching. That moment, I met the girl who would tie this group of friends together with knots so tight, even Popeye couldn’t loosen. We had instant things in common, yet I was hesitant, I wasn’t used to letting strangers in. like I said, this one’s persistent and within weeks she was at my front door, babies in tow inviting herself into my home. We found the similarities in each other that 136

created the bond. She was competitive, and pushed me to challenge myself in life again. Kristina is the one person who managed to make a family for me out of complete strangers. I once told all of these women years ago, I’m not a hugger and I don’t

high school, sit in our cars in a circle, Six feet away from each other and have coffee together?” I nearly screamed YES! Into the phone. So, we met and sat in a circle, My circle. The circle of people who I confide in, laugh with, cry with, and have been penciled into life with. I’d like to think it’s gone from pencil to ink, which makes it permanent. Etched in stone, like the Ten Commandments are our texts. This is my circle, and yesterday even through social distancing, and chaos I needed to see them. And when we left, I said something that I would never have uttered years ago. “I feel like we need to hug.”

like people in my comfort zone. The first time Kris went to hug me I may have even gone to punch her. I know I at least looked at her sideways and questioned why she was “coming at me,” which is funny. Because yesterday morning, when I was asked in a group text by her “ does anyone want to meet at the

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We all drove off, headed back to our homes, our kids, our life. But it wasn’t long before I received a text. A group text. And for now, I’ll take that as my hug.


{ SHIFT+CONTROL }

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{ NEW IN THE ROC }

ALL ACCESS CBD BY MIKE MACARTHUR

Rochester native Mike MacArthur brings his company, All Access CBD, to Webster, NY. As a graduate of Fairport High School, Mike went on to pursue a career in music as a saxophone player. He moved to Florida along with his family to attend Florida State University School of Music, eventually transferring to Manhattan School of Music in NYC. After leaving school Mike settled in Tampa and toured the world with his saxophone playing with Maynard Ferguson, Diane Schuur and Frankie Valli among many others. Mike opened up All Access Vapor in 2014 and grew the business to 3 Tampa based locations. CBD became a natural progression as he built a pharmaceutical grade ISO-6 rated laboratory to manufacture his vapor e-juice and now products for All Access CBD. The company has 3 CBD retail locations in the Tampa area and now the 4th and newest location in Webster, NY. “Bringing the business to Rochester just made sense with the network of family and friends I have there”. 138

The mission statement at All Access CBD reads, “Our mission at All Access CBD is to provide an unparalleled retail experience for our customers. Along with customer service, knowledge,

perspective, not a corporate minded business. Mike says “The idea is to create a place where employees can feel appreciated and at home with a career in front of them. It’s simple, if you show them love, they will love you back”. Mike goes on to say that over the years they have experienced wedding engagements, weddings, first time home buyers and even babies! It is a true family. All Access CBD takes the utmost pride and time in crafting all of the artisan products that bear the name. In addition to the lab, which has 10x the amount of air filtration as a more common ISO-7, all of the staff who work in the lab are certified under Current Good Manufacturing Practices (cGMP). Lab Manager Manny Gacet runs the lab and along with GMP certification, is a graduate of Sativa University.

quality and vibe, our employees are what set us apart from the rest…and we call them Family”. The culture that has been created at All Access CBD comes from a family oriented

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The products include tinctures, lotions, creams, flower, cartridges, bath bombs and much more. All of this is in a store with a crisp and clean environment.


{ {INVISIONARY HER OWN WORDS MINDS } }

HOLLY KATIE

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{ IN HER OWN WORDS }

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{ NEW IN THE ROC } “This company and the people involved have become a huge part of my life and I can’t wait to see how much more we can grow together.”

The products include tinctures, lotions, creams, flower, cartridges, bath bombs and much more. All of this is in a store with a crisp and clean environment. That was important to Mike. “It has to be inviting, professional, crisp and comfortable”. Webster store manager Alex Stevens and Mike have known each other since high school and provides the foundation to extend the Florida based company to NY. Alex spent weeks in Florida with hands on training in multiple locations as well as the lab. Educating the customer is an essential part of the business and it is something that Mike takes seriously. With the emphasis on education and the facts about CBD, the products offered speak for themselves.

With the CBD world growing, it is important to understand where it is made, what is in it and most important, lab testing. When products are produced in the lab, one of every All Access CBD product is sent to a 3rd party testing facility that provides accurate lab results. This process is done for every batch of CBD that they receive from the farm. This will confirm that the amount of CBD on the label is the actual amount in the product. Not all CBD is created equal and All Access takes pride in sourcing the best possible product along with paying attention to every detail in maintaining the quality of what makes it to the shelves. Mike has made it clear that All Access

CBD would not be possible without the amazing team he has by his side. General Manager Richard Girard has been there from day one with the very first store and has seen the growth of the company. He said, “This company and the people involved have become a huge part of my life and I can’t wait to see how much more we can grow together”. You can find more information about All Access CBD and All Access Labs at www.allaccesscbd.com. 1991 Empire Blvd. Webster NY 14580 (585) 347-6568

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{ FASHION FORWARD }

KHANGLE DESIGNS BE DIFFERENT. BE UNIQUE. BE YOU. Khangle was launched in 2014 as a fashion brand by the former name Khang Le (Tin Tin). The label embodies a vast range of luxury products inspired by Prêt-à-Porte high fashion and unique “Avant-garde” styles. Khangle’s designs have expanded to encompass additional fashion merchandise, which include shoes, purses, bags, and jewelry. In addition to clothing design, Khangle works extensively with models and photographers. Khangle established his team of elite models, #TeamKhangle, in 2015. His current team has over 30 models from Upstate NY. He manages and trains his models using various personalized techniques in order to maximize their potential talent. Khangle offers modeling workshops throughout the year at his studio based in Syracuse, NY as well as studios throughout the Northeast 148

and Mid-Atlantic regions. Moreover, he conducts cutting-edge photo shoots for models and strategically strengthens their portfolios. Khangle was launched in 2014 as a fashion brand by the former

fashion merchandise, which include shoes, purses, bags, and jewelry. In addition to clothing design, Khangle works extensively with models and photographers. Khangle established his team of elite models, #TeamKhangle, in 2015. His current team has over 30 models from Upstate NY. He manages and trains his models using various personalized techniques in order to maximize their potential talent. Khangle offers m o d e l i n g workshops throughout the year at his studio based in Syracuse, NY as well as studios throughout the Northeast and MidAtlantic regions. M o r e o v e r, h e conducts cuttingedge photo shoots for models and strategically strengthens their portfolios.

name Khang Le (Tin Tin). The label embodies a vast range of luxury products inspired by Prêt-à-Porte high fashion and unique “Avantgarde” styles. Khangle’s designs have expanded to encompass additional

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Recently, Khangle partnership with Whisky Jacks and came up with the Glass Slipper. His first and exclusive ready-to-wear lines that are focus on bridal and elegant wear.


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{ FASHION FORWARD } “The label embodies a vast range of luxury products inspired by Prêt-à-Porte high fashion and unique “Avant-garde” styles.”


{ UNSTOPPABLE { SHIFT+CONTROL WOMEN } }

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{ UNSTOPPABLE WOMEN }

NOW IS THE TIME FOR WOMEN TO PLAY BIG BY DR. PAM DENTON

“Women by birthright are the change makers, the trend-setters, and the decision makers. Women are real creators and visionaries. We want you to hold a positive vision for the progress of humanity.” –Dr. Pam Denton

life and are willing to do what it takes to access the changes you seek, then you must:

Truly, in this moment we are going through a massive shift. The awakening is so profound that many of us are wondering what to do.

• Begin to build power.

• Step beyond fear and restriction. • Let go of limiting thoughts and beliefs.

Now is the time. We have the time right now to change, grow, and shift. I know you have a project inside of you that is valuable, money-generating, and powerful. Your idea is inside of you, waiting to be born, monetized, and built into a powerful structure of purpose, business, and leadership.

If something inside of you wonders, “Is this article relevant to me to play big? Can I apply this to my particular needs? Am I a Play Big leader? Do I deserve to Play Big as a leader? Especially, right now, while people are suffering and challenged by health and possibly losing jobs.”

Move into your creative glory and abundance. Use community to support you, instead of suffering in silence. I don’t know the details of your life, but I do know you have a hidden power to Play Big. And the expansion of your Inner Knowing helps heal the blocks you are facing. I want you to own your space, hold the space, and create the space for you to Play Big.

I want to say, Yes. Yes. Yes! This time is for those who feel there must be way more to life than just the mundane parts of life to excel. • Maybe you want to live life from a more expansive place.

• Maybe you want to achieve more access to life change. • Or You want to make more money! Don’t buy into fear-based living. It’s not worth the investment. When you decide you want more out of

We are being called to make change a reality, to play big and step outside the box. Many years ago in my health and coaching practice I was guided that women must look to the other side of our stuck and sabotage to find their Inner Strength, become leaders, and activate on the ideas inside of us! Big Ideas!

So much has shifted from the change in our global health 2020. You may be wondering: “What’s next? How can I step forward? How do I repair what I have lost?”

• Maybe you believe in more possibility.

is the calling.

The Play Big process is for women who want to tune into purpose, find their calling to live a largely expansive life – outside of the box. Most of all, it’s for those who feel that it’s time for women to emerge as leaders and lead in their own feminine way. And this pressure we feel inside of our souls and in the global climate of change…..it

Play Big refers to breaking patterns that hold you stuck and in a small position. Women, in particular, are taught to “play small” at a very young age: hold back, hide our feelings, not be heard, not share the truth, fit in, and not stand out. “Be the same and fit in” is the message we hear repeatedly. Women are taught to apologize for our mere presence on the earth, say I’m sorry and make excuses for ourselves, our words, our thoughts, our actions. When we’re taught this, when these are

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the expectations for us, how can we ever Play Big and make an impact in the world? All we’re doing is running programs and stories, holding patterns imprinted into us as children, passed along through generations of training. So how do you shift this? Play Big begins with a calling, the inner knowing of a woman who is embracing purpose, choosing mission first, and leading from that mission. Play Big means honing the creative powers that create our passion. Play is using our inner creativity and knowing 168

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to make the life that we want. It is leading from our mission and playing in our natural birthright of success.

Play Big means you are done with lack and want abundance. This is spirit moving you forward.

That’s a calling. When we are called, we feel passion. It’s an inner surge of energy and a positive drive to do something bigger, to move outside the box we’ve created for ourselves (or the one that has been created for us!).

I call it ‘living in our star power’: it’s the gift, the superpower, the calling that is simply just what we are good at. Now is the time. I want to hear you roar!

When called to Play Big, there is a sense of inspiration.

Dr. Pam Denton is the founder of Superpower Your Success and Superpower Conferences. If you feel called to lead from purpose and passion join us at www.youhavesuperpower. com for success events. We are here for you to help you emerge as a female leader, owning your power!

There is a sense of spiritual guidance, because you are intuitively moved to step outside the box. You are moved to stop feeling constricted and limited.

Now is the time to Play Big.


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{ THE ANIMAL CARE SACTUARY CORNER }

THE EPIC RESCUE TRIP BY ANN LEWIS

Last week, six doggos made the journey from Sullivan County Animal Shelter in TN to ACS! Traveling through four states, with nine legs of the journey & close to 15 volunteers. After a yearlong partnership & 50 dogs transferred, we finally met our rescue partner Eva Brandenburg & foster extraordinaire Debbie Owen. This epic rescue trip happens every week and couldn’t be done without amazing volunteers who are giving these dogs a chance at a beautiful life, while making space for more in need!

approximately 10 times over the total course of the journey until they finally reached their new, and hopefully temporary, home at ACS. “We’re partnered with a Sullivan County shelter that helps us with this program to vet dogs at an overcrowded shelter and bring them up here where we have more room,” ACS’s Rachel Rossiter said. “These dogs have stayed at foster homes before coming up here, so we know they’re great dogs.”

On March 19, Animal Care Sanctuary took in six more dogs that made the near-1,000 mile journey from Tennessee thanks to the efforts of numerous volunteers across multiple states. Specifically, the six canines were transported to the shelter through a team of drivers and coordinators from an overcrowded shelter from Tennessee. The dogs were switched to new vehicles 170

It’s really amazing that these volunteers take sometimes up to four hours out of their day just to transport these dogs,” Rossiter said. “They do so much to help these little guys out. Brandenburg, who usually coordinates the trips but this time actually traveled the whole journey to meet the drivers personally, said all of the trips and transfers are monitored. “We try to maintain constant communication and keep updating all the drivers on locations and arrival times,” she said. “Because you never know when a driver might be held up or taken off course because of an accident or traffic. So we work with them through all of that.

Check out the journey below. Apply to adopt or foster today. If you’re interested in driving get in touch with us! Businesses may be shutting down and people may be staying out of the public, but shelter dogs still need to find new homes.

next leg of the trip.

ACS has been bringing in canines through the transportation program since May, and have now accepted 49 dogs since that time. According to coordinator Eva Brandenburg, volunteers throughout the journey’s course agree to take the dogs up to about two hours worth of the trip towards their destination. Those drivers meet with other volunteers at a certain point, and the dogs are transferred to those vehicles for the

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There’s no fear that we’ll get lost or lose time,” driver Claire Skinner said. “It’s all connected and coordinated. They do such a great job.” As the dogs exercised their energy built up on the trip on the grounds of their new home, Rossiter and Brandenburg shared a hug. After numerous coordinated trips and 49 dogs being transported to ACS since May, this was the first time they met. “Everything has just been so crazy lately, but people are still out here doing what they can to help animals find new homes,” Rossiter said.


{ THE ANIMAL CARE SACTUARY CORNER } “Everything has just been so crazy lately, but people are still out here doing what they can to help animals find new homes.”

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www.AnimalCareSa


anctuary.org


“MAKE EACH DAY YOUR MASTERPIECE” - JOHN WOODEN

SALON BELLA VITA I 32 S MAIN ST I PITTSFORD


{ GLENNA’S { IN HER OWN CBDWORDS CORNER} }

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{ ASK ROBIN HERTZ }

DETOXING BY ROBIN HERTZ

D E TOX I N G A N D BUILDING THE BODIES IMMUNE SYSTEM UP TO FULL SPEED! Ever wonder why some people sail through life with few health issues and others just struggle? During this Epidemic I often wonder why some people are effected so drastically by the Coronavirus and others very little symptoms, are carriers or only slightly!

Also if you have done the 23 and Me gene testing the answers are in there. That test will also show if your liver detoxes properly and if you make adequate supply of glutathione which is critical to your overall health. So genetically I was set up to have poor detox pathways which weaken my system…. HOWEVER... THEN… there was the implants. Nothing like adding fuel to the fire!

They involve many different chemicals and processes to work properly. AND our lifestyle plays a roll in it. Where we live, the water we drink and bath in, the products we use, the foods we eat, the air we breath and even our mind set.

I have a genetic predisposition to be one of the worst methylators according to my genetic Dr. . I do not get rid of toxins easy. Especially heavy metals and chemicals. My genetic snip also involves the absorption and utilization of B vitamins which are needed for every cell in the body to grow and function properly. It’s called MTHFR and over 70% of people have it in one form or another. A simple blood test will tell you if and what type.

I know how to eat right but one thing I needed was to chelate the toxins like mercury out. I tried so many things. Dr. Klinghardt’s protocol, eating tons of fruits, binding mercury with DMPS or EDTA… nothing was working and I was not getting better. Then I remembered my friend Sue Thompson. She had been sick for years and no Dr could figure out what was wrong. She was not functioning, overweight, her head was foggy, she had a hard time wanting to get out of bed and just felt awful.

Genetics play a huge role in it. How our bodies fight infections, our immune response, how we methylate toxins and how we detox.

Our genetics are huge and sometimes we need support where we don’t even realize it.

mercury was off the page and I felt like I was not right. After almost exactly 3 months some of my symptoms came back. This is common as we all need to detox after removing the implants. Actually everyone should detox whether or not you’ve had them or not.

No one with MTHFR should have implants. They are made of all toxic materials and chemicals. I had them for over 15 years and had so many weird symptoms along the way. Implants are toxic to everyone since you are putting a chemical soup of toxins inside your body but It’s even worse if your body doesn’t know what to do with the constant inflammation and toxins. I had them removed October 30, 2019 and instantly felt so much better but just because I removed the source did not mean I was out of the woods. My immune system was compromised and I knew from testing my

I hadn’t talked with Sue for a few years and when I heard from her she was rambling on and on about how she had to come see me. This woman use to talk like Eeyore! Slow and even had trouble finding her words. Now I’m hearing from an upbeat super happy articulate different person. She came over and I was shocked. She had lost so much weight and was just alive like I never saw her before. Why did I decide to try IMMUNOCAL®? Mainly because I saw the dramatic changes in my friend, but also because she explained that it’s a patented food supplement that’s guaranteed to supply the raw materials the body requires to make glutathione (GSH). It seems that every cell in the body has a requirement for glutathione and that the ROCHESTER WOMAN ONLINE :: EMPOWERMENT EDITION 2020

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{ ASK ROBIN HERTZ } “Our genetics are huge and sometimes we need support where we don’t even realize it.”

defensive mechanism of the body depends on GSH to neutralize and flush out toxins of every sort, including molds, candida, chemicals, and heavy metals. In fact when it comes to detoxing our need for glutathione is second only to water. When you look at glutathione in different age groups a striking fact becomes clear in the boring statistics… I don’t want to get too technical but clinical evidence shows that healthy young people make plenty of glutathione. But after 20 GSH production gradually drops off until by the age of 60 -80 most have critically low levels. On the contrary the oldest of the old continue to have a good amount of GSH. So you could say that we age because we make less glutathione! Because our body is designed to make it from the foods we eat, it becomes critical that we find a way to supply the amino acid building blocks that enable the body to manufacture GSH. Unfortunately they are difficult to get in adequate amounts in our modern diet. Happily I feel these positive changes … after 2 weeks it was as if I felt and looked brighter, healthier, even happier! I never had anything that worked like this in my life and I’ve tried SO many things! As my health improved while eating IMMUNOCAL® I came to understand that our life depends on glutathione - literally. Without it, your liver would shrivel up and die from the overwhelming accumulation of toxins, your cells would disintegrate from unrestrained oxidative stress and, as if you 178

needed more problems, your body would have little resistance to bacteria, viruses or cancers. Protective systems of the body including the immune system, rely heavily upon this exceptional molecule. So does the optimal functioning of antioxidants, detoxification pathways and cellular energy production. In fact it’s remarkable that we don’t all succumb to the daily onslaught of toxins in our food, air and water. as chemicals and heavy metals influence all sorts of living tissue and interfere with many bodily functions, the renal (kidneys) system, the cardiovascular (heart and circulation the hematological (blood) system, the gastrointestinal (digestive) system the endocrine (hormonal) system, and many others are impacted one after another, thus contributing to the aging process. We have our body’s defense mechanism to thank, especially the glutathione (GSH) detoxification process. But like all biological systems, this can be overwhelmed by extensive or prolonged attack, and may eventually begin to function poorly. Glutathione is the most important thiol in living systems. It plays a critical role not only in humans but in all life, including insects, plants and micro-organisms. I started to eat Immunocal because it contains the building blocks the body requires to manufacture glutathione to support the detoxification process. I also am preparing my body for the most effective immune system it can have to fight any virus or infection! Immunocal is proven to help build antibodies! Including COVID19! Im taking a full approach! I eat tons of organic fruits and vegetables, and clean antibiotic and hormone free organic meats along with this one product. OhI also take a bile builder for even more liver support.

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Its from UNIKEY! They have videos online on the importance of building your bile for detoxing effectively! I am also rebuilding all of my cells and muscles with the daily supply of essential and non essential aminos. As we age our bodies slow down the natural production of all aminos and we lose muscle, our growth hormone slows way down and our hormones decrease. Every system and organ requires aminos! Every muscle! Every tissue! I’m so excited to not only share my experience but a way to help everyone get healthier in order to fight any and all diseases and be as strong as possible during this terrible epidemic! I thank God for this product! My system was in trouble and I finally feel like I’m stronger than ever! I’m taking 4-6 packages a day right now to really build up! And as always I’m here for everyone for questions and support! AskRobinHertz@gmail.com You can find information in the drug section of the PDR, Physicians’ Desk Reference (https://pdr. net/full-prescribing-information/Immunocalcysteine-257) and to order it, please contact Sue yourself! She is in Montana which is Mountain Time Zone Sue Thompson 406-314-1147 suezqt7@yahoo.com


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{ WOMEN FOR WINESENSE }

WOMEN, WINE AND A CAUSE BY DONNA SCHLOSSER-LONG

As a member of the Rochester Chapter of Women for WineSense for almost twenty years, I have l learned a thing or two. I got in to Women for WineSense because I wanted to learn more about wine. I had no idea I would eventually make it my career nor that I would make life long relationships with so many women from all walks of life. Women for WineSense is first and foremost a Not for Profit, National Wine Education Organization. I thought I could learn how to order wine in a restaurant or how to pick out a great bottle at my favorite liquor store down the street. Wow, did I learn so much more. My very first meeting was back in 2000 or 2001. It was held at Locust Hill Country Club. I walked in to the room not knowing a soul. I checked in and sat at a table near the back. I figured if I hated it or was bored I could sneak out and no one would notice. The subject of the meeting was Wines of Argentina. The speaker was showing pictures from her recent trip to Argentina and we were drinking wines she had tasted on her journey. We also had food to match. I was whisked into a foreign land with food and wine. It was magical. The speaker even told us about the famous Tango of the region. I was hooked. I kept going back month after month. One month was France, another Italy, another Spain. Now this was my kinda organization. Food for the mind, the soul and the stomach. YUM. Well, once you are a member of Women 180

for WineSense for awhile you realize, hey I see familiar faces every month. I ask a lot of questions. I wanted to know more. It wasn’t long before some of the members took me under their wing and said – you should be on the board of Women for WineSense. What did that mean? I went to a meeting at the Co-President’s house. We were greeted with Sparkling Wine, my favorite. We were told that every meeting we would have good wine, good food and good

friends. Wow, were they right. I decided to jump in with both feet. I started helping the Board plan events and eventually became the Vice President. I made some amazing friends almost twenty years ago and still have them today. We planned some fun events like a Murder Mystery dinner, A Wine Jeopardy Game Night, A New Orleans Themed event. So many events where wine and education took center stage. Take a look back at the topic of this article, Women, Wine and a Cause.

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Well, we covered the Women. We covered the Wine. Now for the Cause. Women for WineSense has always been a generous organization to the community. Every year we would adopt a family at Christmas and make it special for them with amazing gifts and filled their home with food for the holidays. We eventually created a Charity Director position on the Rochester Board. That Director would select four local charities to donate money or goods too. Every year for as long as I can remember Women for WineSense has given thousands of dollars to charity. Our focus has always been women or children from the local area. We have had numerous charities educate us on what is happening in our backyards and how we can help them. One of my favorite charities to work with was the last one. Sleep in Heavenly Peace. They are new to the area. They make beds and get kids up off the floor. “No kid sleeps on the floor in our town”. I have goosebumps just saying it out loud. I guess what I am trying to say is, if you like wine, you like food and you like people. Women for WineSense is for you. Our meetings are the second Tuesday of every month. Come learn about amazing wines from your backyard and all over the world. You might make a friend or maybe even twenty. Can’t wait to see you at the next meeting.


{ IN HER DEFENSE }

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{ CNY{ WOMAN WHO INSPIRES } SHIFT+CONTROL }

DR. SHANELLE BENSON REID THE EDUCATOR “Education is the passport to the future, for tomorrow belongs to those who prepare for it today.” Malcolm X THE UNEXPECTED OUTCOME Dr. Shanelle R. Benson Reid never expected to be a teacher. However, she was told early on that she should be an educator, but she had no interest. She spent a great deal of time tutoring in high school and she liked helping classmates, though, she hated working on specific content. “That being said, success feels gratifying” so she worked hard in all of her classes: early mornings, late nights, whatever it took and she did very well. Please understand, school did not come easy to Dr. Benson Reid but she was committed. Upon graduating from high school, she was awarded an academic scholarship; unfortunately, she was also pregnant. She took he first quarter off then reenrolled. She failed miserably and was placed on academic probation. Attending college as a single, young mother was one of her greatest challenges. Eventually, she left the university and began attending the local community college. At that time, she lacked dedication and withdrew from more classes than she completed. Then something happened. She realized there was more to life than driving a school bus, not that driving a bus is bad; it still remains one of her favorite experiences. Nonetheless, she had a renewed commitment. She completed her coursework at the community college and returned to the university. She earned an A.A. and B.A.

in the same year. She was accepted into a graduate program and planned to study Sociology of Education with an emphasis on Race, Class and Gender. She was driven, focused and motivated. The thoughts of being a schoolteacher had faded and life was moving at a terrific pace.

Benson Reid’s frustration. Dr. Benson Reid recounts, “Every year after that was traumatic. He struggled mightily: poor tests grades, missing homework assignments, inattention during instruction, frequent trips to the principal’s office and numerous parent-teacher conferences.” She recalls one conference in particular; during a meeting the teacher disclosed, “She should not have to put up with his behaviors.” Dr. Benson Reid was livid, gave the teacher a piece of her mind and made the decision to change her graduate major. Education needed her and she was up for the challenge. She met with her mentor, enrolled in a teacher education program and the rest is history. THE STATE OF EDUCATION Philosophically, Dr. Benson Reid does not believe in the structure of public education. She states, “Our entire system is inadequate and antiquated. As a student, I recall thinking to myself; nothing this teacher is doing is causing me to get excited about education. I’m not interested in math, I’m not interested in science, I’m not interested in social studies and I’m not interested ELA, I guess in actuality I wasn’t interested in school but I trusted the process so I pressed on.”

As mentioned earlier, Dr. Shanelle was pregnant with her first child when she graduated from high school. Eighteen months after having a daughter, she had a son. She noticed glaring differences between the two children but she attributed those variances to gender. She was wrong. Her son’s kindergarten teacher explained her concerns and did her best to ease Dr.

She goes on to reveal, “In the profession, we like to believe that education has evolved. We’ve incorporated manipulative, charts, graphs and visual representations. We allow movement, flexible seating, alternate assessments but the curriculum remains the same.” Other aspects of society have improved, however the most important societal ROCHESTER WOMAN ONLINE :: EMPOWERMENT EDITION 2020

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“Educating students from diverse backgrounds and situations is a complex process involving big-picture considerations and specific instructional strategies; at the very least, these students need to know adults in their lives are aware of the cultural and social conditions they encounter on a consistent basis and truly care about their personal and academic success.�

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SHIFT+CONTROL } { CNY{ WOMAN WHO INSPIRES } “Education is the passport to the future, for tomorrow belongs to those who prepare for it today.” - Malcolm X

component has not; education has remained the same. “How can we justify not revolutionizing our current educational system while our students have evolved, our society has advanced and other industries have adapted?” The wheels of progress turn slowly in education so instead of waiting for a system-wide transformation, Dr. Shanelle R. Benson Reid decided to take a proactive approach. ACCESS Global Group (AGG) is her educational consulting company. Dr. Benson Reid is the President and CEO of AGG. ACCESS Global Group creates uniquelydesigned, programs for academic communities and professional organizations in the areas of cultural competency, social awareness, leadership development and employment / educational equity. The programs are based on extensive research, practical knowledge and over twenty years of mentoring, teaching, training and leadership experience. THE CARDS METHOD Educating students from diverse backgrounds and situations is a complex process involving big-picture considerations and specific instructional strategies; at the very least, these students need to know adults in their lives are aware of the cultural and social conditions they encounter on a consistent basis and truly care about their personal and academic success. From this foundation, trusting relationships develop and serve as an essential context for learning. While this bridge from awareness and caring to learning and achievement is necessary for a successful school career, it is vitally important

for students from marginalized backgrounds, who tend to experience more challenges in their personal and academic lives. Students from these communities benefit from the type of support that nurtures emotional growth while simultaneously providing optimal conditions for effective learning and based on this knowledge, the “CARDS Professional Development Method” was created.

to the organization. However, environments that embrace diversity, inclusivity and equity require comprehensive training and persistent adaptability, therefore, The CLEAN Method was developed based on these principles. ACCESS Global Group Welcome to ACCESS Global Group: The Coaching and Consulting Organization! They are here to serve! Prepare to be amazed!

THE CLEAN METHOD

THE ENTREPRENEUR “Fearlessness is like a muscle. I know from my own life that the more I exercise it the more natural it becomes to not let my fears run me.” Arianna Huffington HER JOURNEY Dr. Benson Reid earned a Bachelor’s degree in Sociology from California State University, San Bernardino (CSUSB) and a Master’s in Education (Special Education Option) from CSUSB as well. After teaching for several years, Dr. Benson Reid decided to pursue her doctorate in Organizational Leadership and later start ACCESS Global Enterprises. ACCESS Global Enterprises is the parent company of ACCESS Dental Laboratories.

The CLEAN Corporate Training Method is based on perception, performance and production. The program focuses on a holistic approach to building the corporate community by addressing the needs of all members. Diversity and inclusivity are vital to establishing a thriving workplace, especially when it comes to employee engagement and group dynamics. Furthermore, creating an equitable environment cultivates creativity and innovation because team members, from executives to apprentices, bring a variety of backgrounds, experiences and perspectives

MR. RIGHT After serving as an educator and consulting in Central New York for several years, she met her husband, Mr. Todd Reid. A seasoned professional himself, Mr. Reid has built a career as an expert in the dental field. He has over twenty-five years of experience in the industry and specializes in fullmouth reconstruction. Recently, the couple decided to expand the ACCESS Global Brand. ACCESS Global Enterprises is now the parent company of ACCESS Dental Laboratories, the first and only black-owned,

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{ CNY WOMAN WHO INSPIRES } “Fearlessness is like a muscle. I know from my own life that the more I exercise it the more natural it becomes to not let my fears run me.” - Arianna Huffington

full-service dental laboratory in the United States. Together, Shanelle and Todd now run ACCESS Global Enterprises.

in poverty. Life was hard but I knew it would be great one day. I know unequivocally, my next day is my best day.”

THE ENTERPRISE As a MWBE (Minority Women Business Enterprise, ACCESS Global Enterprises has several projects in development, from recently gaining site-control of a 16,000 square-foot building from the Syracuse Landbank to designing the state of the art curriculum and training program for the laboratory employees. As an MWBE, they were recipients of grants from the Alliance for Economic Inclusion (AEI) and the Regional Economic Development Council (REDC). Additionally, they are seeking support from SIDA (Syracuse Industrial Development Agency) and the National Grid Economic Development Program.

THE WOMAN…MY GRAND RISING “I don’t believe in magic,” the young boy said. The old man smiled, “You will when you see her.” Atticus

THE STORY Once complete, the four-story building will include office rental space, a childcare center, a café, a fitness center, the ACCESS Dental Laboratory and the ACCESS Dental Executive Offices. At capacity, the Reids anticipate hiring 50 people from the Southside of Syracuse. The couple has been intentional about locating their business in the city, getting community buy-in, and being a cornerstone in the rejuvenation of Syracuse’s Southside. They understand it will require a lot of work, but they are ready and willing. This project is the culmination of a two-year process that included, late nights, numerous meetings, unexpected expenses, yet here they are, ready to transform a community. ONWARD, UPWARD AND BEYOND For Shanelle, this desire to impact a community comes from within and knowing that her trajectory is onward, upward and beyond. “People see the businesses and degrees but have no idea that I was a teen mom, struggling to make ends meet, living 188

CONSIDERATIONS Here I am, the year is 2020 and life as I know it is in the rearview mirror. The world is at a standstill; quarantines, shortages, layoffs, etc. A global pandemic has caused an upheaval and it is time to prepare for the aftermath. So before I hunker down and

wait patiently for the world to reawake, I will consider my family, my friendships, my finances, my future and my Grand Rising. FAMILY Where do I turn when faced with catastrophe, most often towards love. No matter my status; married, parent, guardian, grandparent, etc., when life crumbles, I turn to the familial. The people who adore me without condition, those who long for my presence, the ones I cherished at first sight, the individuals I could not live without, now is the time to turn to love. Embrace this moment and be adored, be present, be cherished, be valued and be loved. I have been given an opportunity to wake up everyday and dwell

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in love. I will appreciate this experience, this moment and revel in love. FRIENDSHIPS We grow and vibe, then build and thrive. We cheer for each other and support one another. We share visions, passions and dreams, the visible, tangible and unseen. We are friends, comrades and confidants. Now is the time to build and nurture relationships, create support systems and expand networks. Send the text, compose the email, schedule the meeting, let’s connect; Hey girl, I love you in bunches, we are stronger together. FINANCES I am busy minding my money. Setting aside for the unknown, unseen and unexpected. Yes, I am in the midst of it all, yet I will continue to mind my money. Education is my passion and I work tirelessly in all areas: yes I am the professor, the consultant, the coach, the author, and the professional speaker. This is my life, I love it and I am minding my money. What else shall I do, perhaps another business is on the horizon, like I said, I am minding my money. FUTURE Embrace this life and the days to come; I walk, rest, breathe, be and know there is no life without health. I am well in my soul; I pray because I need to talk to God and I mediate because I need to hear from God. I have it all; I owe it to my ancestors to make the most of this life: Goddess, Queen, Wife and Mother. It is all for you; everything I am, I owe to you. Everything I do, I do for you. I am me, because of you. I Am Shanelle And This Is My The Grand Rising To contact Shanelle email: drshanelle@ accessglobalenterprises.com


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4th Annual Rochester

Catwalk for Kidneys Presented By

DATE TO BE DETERMINED Watch out for our announcements!

Join us for the premiere fashion show of the season! Catwalk for Kidneys is an opportunity to celebrate spring fashions modeled by local favorites, healthcare professionals, kidney and transplant patients and donor families and living donors. The event will offer an opportunity to celebrate friends, family and local seasonal activities, while also helping instill the importance of caring for the body, mind and soul when dealing with the effects of kidney disease.

Tickets: $50 regular ticket $45 young professional ticket (under 35)    $30 for patients $450 for reserved table of 10 Purchase     tickets at www.healthykidneys.org

It’s a fashion show like none other –  and it’s one you don’t want to miss!


THE NORTHEAST KIDNEY FOUNDATION ROCHESTER

BEYOND THE SCARS DATE TO BE DETERMINED

Watch out for our announcements!


THE { COVER HEROINSTORY EPIDEMIC } }} { {FINANCIALLY SPEAKING

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{ LIVING CONFIDENTLY }

THANKS MOM! BY ANGELA VAHUE

When it comes to managing your personal finances, there’s plenty of complex advice out there. But often, simpler is better. It turns out Mom really did know best when she laid down essential truths to live by. Here are some Mom-isms that have stood the test of time.

SLEEP ON IT Research shows many financially and emotionally confident working Americans put a premium on planning and getting information before making a financial decision. Taking a step back and assessing a situation can help you make the right choice.

WASTE NOT, WANT NOT Being mindful about spending got many of our parents and grandparents through tough economic times. Be honest: How much unnecessary spending do you do? Here are some painless ways to waste less of your money so you have more to put towards your lifegoals and passions.

BRUSH AND FLOSS YOUR TEETH Sure, Mom was trying to save on dental bills. But mostly she was trying to teach us the value of protective measures to prevent future pain. As

BUY QUALITY, NOT QUANTITY From candy to playing cards, this one could be a struggle for kids. But as adults, that nugget of wisdom can apply to both the objects we buy and the services we use, including your financial products. SAVE FOR A RAINY DAY What’s your “rainy day”? An interruption to your income? Retirement? An unexpected medical bill? A once-in-a-lifetime opportunity? The point is, becoming a world-class saver puts you in a better position to handle anything—good or bad—life throws you.

adults, we take that advice to heart when we consider ways to protect our income and our loved ones in the event of the unexpected, with things like individual disability and whole life insurance. PUT YOUR TOYS AWAY Taking care of what we love is one of our earliest life lessons. Later in life, our toys have been replaced by cherished assets, many of which we want to pass on to the next generation. Take time to protect what you love with legacy

and estate planning. LET’S PLAY THE QUIET GAME While mom usually pulled this one out when there was just way too much chatter, it helps to take quiet time for yourself. It can help you make thoughtful, long-term financial decisions, rather than react impulsively to the next big thing. TREAT OTHERS THE WAY YOU WANT TO BE TREATED This classic certainly applies to your social interactions, but it can also apply to your financials. By taking steps to protect yourself, you are protecting the ones you love, just as you would want them to do for you. A BIRD IN THE HAND IS WORTH TWO

IN THE BUSH One of the more esoteric mom-isms, this can apply to retirement planning. By selecting the right mix of retirement income solutions now, you can set yourself up with guaranteed income for the full length of your retirement. Never knew mom was such a financial guru, did you?

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{ KELLY’S CHOICE }

HOW TO PRIORITIZE YOUR HEALTH BY KELLY SPRINGER, MS, RD, CDN

DURING THE C O R O N AV I R U S PANDEMIC

It’s a frightening and strange time for us during the coronavirus pandemic. We must adapt to a new “normal” with the social distancing and working from home mandates. How’s that going for you? I am handling it and trying to help in whatever way I can. I encourage you all to commit to your health during this time. The CDC and WHO have given a lot of advice about the importance of frequent handwashing whenever you have been in public for your essentials. I fervently agree with handwashing but want to address the importance of losing weight and reducing stress during this time as well. It’s hard to lose weight during stressful times. We all succumb to emotional eating. If you are overweight, you are more likely to have heart disease and/or Type-II Diabetes, two of the major preexisting health conditions that put people at higher risk for contracting COVID-19. That’s a lot to swallow, right? Don’t be scared though; there are some basic steps you can take to begin losing weight: EAT ACCORDING TO MYPLATE MyPlate is a platform developed by the USDA that helps you to choose foods that support your health. The platform recommends 1-2 cups of fruit a day and 1-3 cups of vegetables a 194

day depending on your age. The platform expresses the importance of whole grains, advising that half of your grains are whole grains. The amount of whole grains MyPlate recommends varies between 3 and 8 ounces, depending on age and physical activity. In general, 1 slice of bread, 1 cup of ready-to-eat cereal, or ½ cup of cooked rice, cooked pasta, or cooked cereal can be considered as 1 ounce-equivalent from the Grains Group.

easy changes. If you and your family do not get enough fruits or veggies, start keeping a fruit bowl out for snacks and slowly reduce the cookies, candy, and other less healthy treats.

The platform recommends 2-6.5 ounces of lean protein a day, In general, 1 ounce

Chop some peppers, carrots and other veggies at the beginning of the week and keep a salad mix on hand to help fulfil the veggie recommendation. Frozen veggies are great to keep if you are worried about spoilage. Experiment with condiments. Cooked veggies get a bad rep for being mushy. But if you steam, roast or even grill them and add just a little seasoning they can be delicious.

of meat, poultry or fish, ¼ cup cooked beans, 1 egg, 1 tablespoon of peanut butter, or ½ ounce of nuts or seeds can be considered as 1 ounce-equivalent from the Protein Foods Group.

If you are not used to eating w h o l e grains, start simple. Replace regular pasta for whole grain pasta; swap out white rice for brown rice; have oatmeal for breakfast; choose whole grain breads over white bread; swap out chips for lightly salted air-popped popcorn (yes, popcorn is a whole grain).

And finally, MyPlate includes the importance of having 2-3 servings of low-fat dairy a day. In general, 1 cup of milk, yogurt, or soymilk (soy beverage), 1 ½ ounces of natural cheese, or 2 ounces of processed cheese can be considered as 1 cup from the Dairy Group. Learn more about MyPlate at myplate.gov. If you are not used to eating the way that MyPlate recommends, start by making

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Use this time to learn easy, healthy recipes Did you know that dining out is one of the biggest reasons people become overweight—portions tend to be large and meals tend to be more caloric than home-cooked meals. Now that you are forced to stay home, try learning some healthy recipes. If you have always been intimidated to cook, don’t be; it just takes practice and some easy-to-follow recipes. I have dozens of quick and healthy ecipes on my website. Check


{ WOMAN WHO INSPIRES }

FRACASSI

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{ KELLY’S CHOICE } “It’s hard to lose weight during stressful times. We all succumb to emotional eating.”

then out at https://www.kellyschoice. org/resources/recipes/. EXERCISE Going for a walk, jog, or bike ride is the perfect way to prevent cabin fever and it will help you to lose weight too. Or do yard work—that is considered exercise as well. There are also many gyms across the country that are offering free online workouts. Google “free online workouts” under the News tab and you will find hundreds of gyms offering online workouts f o r f re e d u r i n g the Coronavirus outbreak. BECOME A KELLY’S CHOICE V I R T U A L NUTRITION CLIENT Kelly’s Choice is here to help too. You can have live sessions with one of our amazing dietitians through a video chat or enroll in a program that includes videos that you can watch whenever you have time. The coolest thing is that many insurances can cover your sessions with one of our dietitians. If you are a state employee and are enrolled in the Empire Plan, Kelly’s Choice accepts your insurance! Several other insurance companies will reimburse you for your nutrition session expenses. 196

In addition to helping you lose weight and develop a life-long healthier lifestyle, Kelly’s Choice dietitians have had success at reducing clients’ cholesterol and blood-pressure numbers and have even reverse many cases of Type-II diabetes. Learn more at kellyschoice.org, calling 315-730-4459 or emailing kellyspringer@ live.com.

LOOK FOR POSITIVES AND REDUCE STRESS I will close this article with the importance of looking for positives. Smile when there are blue skies. Watch something that makes you laugh. Call a friend who is known for her positive mental

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attitude. And there’s a super cool Positivity Project I’ll be announcing on my website, Facebook page, an Instagram feed soon! I am partnering with Healhie and we will be including fun videos of members of my team sharing ideas to make this hard time a little bit more positive! Stay tuned and be safe! Tr y y o g a o r meditation for reducing stress. If you attend religious services, look for livestreamed services online. Remember this outbreak is not permanent. We will get through it! Kelly Springer is the founder of Kelly’s Choice nutritional company. She’s been featured in several magazines and has appeared on many television shows, including Good Morning America! For more nutrition tips, visit www. kellyschoice.org, find Kelly’s Choice on Instagram at https:// www.instagram.com/ kellyschoicenutrition o r Fa c e b o o k . a t https://www.facebook.com/KChoiceLLC. You can also connect with Kelly Springer on LinkedIn.


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{ GET VITALIZED }

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ATHLETIC PERFORMANCE & STRENGTH/ENDURANCE This treatment is used to improve muscular performance, increase blood flow, and improve endurance. (1 Hour Treatment) ATHLETIC RECOVERY & ANTI- CATABOLIC (MUSCLE BREAKDOWN) This is used for muscle recovery after exercise, wound healing; reverse catabolic breakdown of muscle. (One Hour treatment) ADD ON: Glutathione push: A powerful antioxidant that provides immune system support, detoxifies your body, removes free radicals, boosts energy levels, and improves neurodegenerative diseases. TRI- AMINO Can be added to most treatment bags or can be given as an IV push. Improves circulation, growth hormone, muscular endurance, and helps reverse migraine symptoms. It also promotes the production of nitric oxide which helps with overall circulation. TriAmino helps in supporting healthy levels of Human Growth Hormone (HGH) by stimulating the release of HGH from the pituitary gland. It is commonly used to promote wound healing and recovery from sportsrelated or work injuries. L-GLYCINE An amino acid that helps to improve mood, energy, muscle performance; helps with cognitive function during

low carbohydrate diets or in general. This is given as an IV push. L-CARNITINE Assists with fatty acid metabolism and weight control, myocardial infarction protection, circulation disorders, promotes cellular energy and reduces fatigue. This can be added to most treatment bags or given as an IV push. PYRIDOXINE (B6) Involved in the process of making serotonin and norepinephrine and the formation of myelin. Off label use lowers homocysteine. Helps to alleviate depression and improve overall mood. MIC This is an intramuscular injection. Used to help aid fat metabolism; typically used for liver disease, and increases liver enzymes. LIPO B OR C This is an intramuscular injection. Used for liver disease, increasing liver enzymes, fat metabolism, and energy. VITAMIN B12 This can be added to a treatment bag or given as an intramuscular injection. This vitamin improves concentration, mood and energy; should be supplemented in vegetarians who do not get adequate amounts of B12 from diet. Vital for neurologic function. 980 Westfall Rd Rochester, NY 14618 585.287.5299 vitalizemedicalcenter.com ROCHESTER WOMAN ONLINE :: EMPOWERMENT EDITION 2020

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{ CHILDREN AWAITING PARENTS }

YOUTH WAITING FOR FOREVER FAMILIES BY LAURIE MCKNIGHT

In the United States in 2019, over 123,000 children were in foster care waiting to be adopted into a permanent, loving family (Adoption. com). Many are teens who have been waiting in fos-ter care for more than three years. Roughly 40% of adoptions are from the U.S. foster care system, and 29% of these children will spend at least three years in foster care. The even more bitter statistic is that every year, ap-proximately 20% of these youth “age out” of the foster care system at ages 18-21 without e ve r h a v i n g been adopted or having a support network. There is a generation of youth who have no real sense of belonging and often look for that belonging in places that often are not conducive to a healthy, productive life. Who are these children? The Adoption Exchange says that the children who wait are often the survivors of abuse and neglect. They are school-aged children, siblings, children of color, and children with special needs. These children often bounce around in a series of foster and group homes. There

they wait in hopes for the stability of an adoptive family of their own. “Some people wonder why there are so many teenagers still wanting to be adopted, still feeling that a family is so important. One 16-year-old we worked with said that when he graduated high school, he wanted one

person in that room to be there for him. It’s always important.” (Gloria Hochman, director of communications at the National Adoption Center.) As of 2016, there were 81,000 adoptive families, but in no way does that ensure adoption for many older youth or young adults. To help increase a nationwide awareness and visibility of these available youth, adoption agencies like Children Awaiting Parents (CAP) or Adopt US Kids photo-list

these youth on their websites along with a short description of who they are. These spotlighted kids are just a small sampling of the amazing, wonderful kids out there wait-ing for their forever family. Creative, smart, and friendly Sharelle describes herself as a happy person with a great person-ality and a sense of humor. She is very artistic and good at fashion and design. She enjoys arts and crafts, loves to hang out with her friends, and enjoys listening to music. She has dreams of going into nursing, and hopes to have a forever family who will support and encourage her in her future goals. Keesha will be 19 this year, and has a bright smile that lights up a room. Kind and compassion-ate, Keesha enjoys arts and crafts, swimming, and organizing things. She would love a family who will stick with her through thick and thin, give her unconditional love, and support her to be as independent as she can be.


{ CHILDREN AWAITING PARENTS } “These spotlighted kids are just a small sampling of the amazing, wonderful kids out there waiting for their forever family. ”

Josh is now 14 years old, but what he may seem to lack in stature, he more than makes up for in personality. He likes to play and use his imagination. Although he’s not really into sports, he does love to swim! Josh would like a maternal person in his life, and would thrive with affection and a sense of security. He is looking for a family to “do normal things with, like 204

hug and say I love you.” At Children Awaiting Parents, our goal is to build awareness of the youth who are waiting, find them families, and decrease the number of unadopted 18-21-yearolds before they are legally independent and age out without the necessary love, guidance and skills needed for a produc-

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tive life. Our mantra is “Every child is adoptable.” #areyoutheone? www. childrenawaitingparents.org.


Finding Families for Waiting Kids. For more information contact: 888-835-8802 or 585-232-5110 info@capbook.org ChildrenAwaitingParents.org

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{{ SHE { THEENTREPRENHERS PAIN RN } }} SHE HUSTLES HUSTLES ENTREPRENHERS

FINDING MY PATH BY MEREDITH DAWES

THROUGH GRIEF, GUILT AND LOSS I was 34 years old when I was diagnosed with RSD. I had survived the roller coaster of my twenties and looking forward to an advancing career as an RN and raising a family. That was what I thought my plan would be, but that’s not how things would happen at all. I spent the rest of my thirties in some of the worst pain imaginable, I was angry and I felt very alone. I had to work through these feelings and unfortunately accept an unacceptable “new normal”. For me there were no other options, it was either live or die. I wanted to live, I just didn’t know how to do it. When the term grief crosses your mind you think of losing a loved one or significant loss in your life. What happens when that loss is you and you’re still alive? The journey is dark and lonely, honestly I didn’t know if I could do it. Learning how to live with RSD will be the rest of my life. (For now) I am trying to live a dignified and purposeful life to the best of my ability. Right now that’s good enough for me. I am going to just outline the stages in grief as it applied to me in my battle with RSD. I feel that in order to find yourself again, you have to face it and feel it. -Denial: Shock and Disbelief .When they told me there was no cure for RSD, it took me several years to accept that fact. The disbelief was holding up my recovery. I wasn’t researching treatment options or looking at alternative therapies. Until I accepted my diagnosis I could not possibly begin to heal. 208

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-Bargaining and Desperation: I put on the bravest face I could bare it was hard to lie to everyone, because I tried to live like I didn’t have RSD. That landed me in more pain. I was desperate to hang on, I started to question my identity and my life. Trying to live your life as if nothing happened, pleading and bargaining to keep the life I knew. - Angry, Paingry: I was down right furious when I came to the conclusion that there was nothing I could do. The limitations I faced were permanent, there was so much I couldn’t do. There was no cure, and I seriously disliked the treatment options. I now have moved to paingry which to me is anger towards this painful disease that has left me powerless. - Anxiety, Guilt and Depression: This comes and goes, It’s worse for me during a flare or on bad pain day. Just recognizing it and giving myself permission to feel sad about the life I had lost, the limitations and fear and anxiety about the future .The Mountain of guilt, I felt like a burden on my family and I wasn’t enough for my husband, that was half the battle. The other half is finding a professional to talk about what and how you’re feeling. One of the best things I did for myself is find a psychologist that specializes in Chronic Pain. She kept me alive. -Loss of self and Confusion: Where do I fit? Who am I? What is my purpose? I questioned everything because I felt like I had finally found who I was, just to lose it all. I had a full on identity crisis. Dig deep your still there!

-ReEvaluating Your Life, New goals, New Dreams- I forced myself to explore new roles, make my life work within the limitations I have. I stepped out of my comfort zone to grow in my new life. For me right now it’s a work in progress. I never imagined I would be rewriting my life at 42 years old, but I am. -Acceptance-I strongly dislike people telling me to accept it, then I can heal. For now I accept this unacceptable pain. I keep hope alive that one day there will be a cure for RSD, for now I will try to live a dignified purposeful life to the best of my ability. The struggle is fresh in my thoughts daily and this is been extremely difficult to write about. When you have something happen to you that literally changes everything in your life in a negative way it’s hard to gain perspective. People would ask me all the time “how are you doing”. I hated that, I felt like saying Im in so much pain I can’t sleep, I can’t work, Im pretty much useless and I don’t leave my house. I never said that though and kept my feeling in for years. That did not serve me well, it wasn’t until I started talking about it and how I really felt that I could begin to heal the hole in my soul left there by this illness. I will continue to advocate for those affected with chronic depilating conditions, spread awareness so the research continues and a cure is found.


{ SHE HUSTLES ENTREPRENHERS }

FLEET FEET


{ MENTALLY THINKING }

COVID-19 AND EMOTIONAL DISTRESS BY BONNIE FLOYD

We’re all currently dealing with the mass uncertainty imposed by the COVID-19 pandemic. While we’re bombarded with information regarding the medical aspects of this pandemic, it appears that more attention needs to be paid to the emotional aspects of coping with this rampant virus. Dealing with this virus has ushered in a wide variety of changes in our everyday lives, ranging from the trivial, to those that are more significant in nature.

period of denial for any significant loss that we encounter, we lose the precious resource of time. I’ve already witnessed friends and family members engage in spirited discussions about the true nature of the COVID-19 pandemic, as well as about the most appropriate medical and political means to address it. Others are contending with the anger phase of adjusting to loss. We’re intensely irritated that our everyday routines have

It strongly appears that many of us are experiencing the typical stages of grief and loss as we attempt to cope with this pandemic. When we encounter losses, we typically go through the following stages: denial, anger, bargaining, and acceptance. Losses not only include the death of a loved one. There may be symbolic losses with which we are dealing, too. Perhaps your high school senior is prevented from attending his/her prom, a cherished rite of passage. Consequently, he or she is dealing with the loss of an important event that never was allowed to take place. Some of us are still dealing with denial, as manifested by attempts to downplay the seriousness of this pandemic. In addition, we may minimize the importance of continuing to engage in social distancing as a means of flattening the curve. When we choose to remain in an extended 212

been so powerfully disrupted. We find ourselves agitated by the quotas that have been placed on the purchase of everyday items that we need to us. Perhaps we feel frustrated by having to find novel ways to perform our workrelated activities. Personally, I’ve found myself very challenged by the process of converting the college class that I’ve been teaching to an online one. I’ve also experienced frustration with attempting

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to set up teletherapy sessions for my nursing home residents. Maybe we find ourselves in the bargaining phase of grieving, assuming that engaging in extended weeks of isolation will attenuate the ultimate impact of COVID-19. We promise to adhere to a limited period of altering our lifestyle, expecting that our reward will be that our lives return to normal. The sheer uncertainty of this novel pandemic makes it much so more difficult with which to cope. We don’t honestly know how much longer, after all, that our everyday lives will be so radically altered. We all struggle, to a certain degree, with adjusting to our new normal. It’s very important to be patient with ourselves as we navigate this novel territory; having unrealistic expectations for our degree of adjustment will only compound our level of emotional distress. Hopefully, most of us will eventually come to accept the new way of life that has been recently imposed on us by the COVID-19 pandemic. We’ll learn to be human “beings,” as opposed to human “doings.” We’ll learn to purchase adequate resources for our immediate family’s needs, as opposed to hoarding resources that are also truly needed by others. Optimally, we’ll learn to cherish increased


{ MENTALLY THINKING } “Hopefully, most of us will eventually come to accept the new way of life that has been recently imposed on us by the COVID-19 pandemic.”

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{ {RWO’S MENTALLY MENTAL THINKING HEALTH} }

“We’ll survive this pandemic, after all. We’ll survive together.”

time with our family members, as opposed to being irritated by one another’s flaws and imperfections. We’ll value our friendships to a greater degree and make scheduling lunch with a friend an actual priority, as opposed to a mere option. Hopefully, we’ll realize that our priorities were previously very distorted. We will learn to be more grateful for our everyday blessings, as opposed to always waiting for something positive to happen to us. We’ll avoid placing our happiness on hold. Basically, we’ll 214

learn to live in the present, as opposed to residing in future possibilities. We will find ourselves less defined by our accomplishments, as well as by our possessions. Every crisis presents an opportunity for us. We can actively choose to focus on what we have lost, versus deciding to focus on what remains. In novel situations, it’s critically important to focus on what we can continue to control. Maybe this involves making a daily schedule of things to do, as well as setting modest

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everyday goals to accomplish. Doing so will undoubtedly assist us with feeling more in control of our day-to-day life. We’re all in this together, after all. Maybe you can leave a bag on groceries on your elderly neighbor’s porch, just to make their lives a little easier. Perhaps you’ll choose to phone a friend that you may have lost touch with, for whatever reason. We’ll survive this pandemic, after all. We’ll survive together.


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{ YOU MATTER }

EMPOWERED BY JUDI SWANSON

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Do you have any things in your life you want to achieve or conquer? It could range from smaller accomplishments to those on a larger scale. I have been working diligently to stretch myself to overcome my own hurdles to achieve some goals that are important to me. Writing for Rochester Woman Online is an honor and I take writing these articles seriously. Let me explain why this one is different than the other articles I have submitted.

Weeks would go by with great plans of writing this article prior to the due date and it did not happen. Until today. Today I gave myself a firm deadline of writing the day before. No more excuses. As I am writing I feel more relaxed and in the flow. Often when I am writing on the due date I feel a time crunch, pressured, and stressed. Writing this the day before it’s due feels so much better.

I wrote this the day before it was due. Yep that’s it. Every time I know the deadline to submit an article is coming I procrastinate, waiting until the last minute to write. After I am finished, I skim the article over to look for any changes that are needed and then boom, I email it. . What happens more than not is I later I revisit the article. I always see mistakes or sentences that need editing. Sometimes I can resubmit it in the time frame I have, others not. . I know the best way for me to write is to write, then let what I have written sit and look at it the next day with fresh eyes. It helps improve how I write, what I write. For me it feels better. It’s like preparing a french toast bake the night before where it sits in the refrigerator overnight blending and absorbing all the delicious flavors together. You add a few ingredients in the morning and bake a wonderful, delicious breakfast.

There are some other goals that I am proud of myself for achieving. Towards the end of 2019 I began going to two 5:30am fitness classes getting up at 4:10am to get ready. Getting up at the wee hours of the morning is something that does not come naturally to me. It required sheer determination, a no excuses mind set and a wanting to change. Yep did it. In January I added a third class which is a cycling class. For those

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who have not taken a cycling class they are a beast. My two morning classes are intense. Cycling is a s whole new level of stretch for me. There is something powerful that improves my mood and confidence when I leave each and every class. Even though my work portions and other life stuff is just getting going I feel like I have crushed my day. These goals I set for myself I did not share with anyone. None on these goals or challenges are things I had to do. All of them are what I wanted to accomplish for myself. Some research supports the idea that it is best to keep your goal to yourself. Part of it comes from other people’s fears, the naysayers, their own sense of not accomplishing goals for themselves so when you tell them yours they subtly, or not subtly, put you and your goal down. An article in Science Daily dated September 3, 2019 titled “Share your goals, but be careful whom you tell” supports the idea of being choosy in regards to whom you tell your goal. Make sure it is someone who will build you up and support you. Not someone who will bring you down. By nature I am an internal person so my decision was to share my success after. I had some wonderful cheers and good for you from some people. Others not


{ YOU MATTER } “Celebrate come on. Celebrate your accomplishments or successes. It does not matter what they are. It matter’s that you did it. ”

so much. Regardless I was and am proud of myself. How often do we celebrate our personal victories? In my eyes not often enough. Regardless of the achievement we should be patting ourselves on the back and sometimes sharing it with others. When we were little it felt super awesome when we learned to tie our shoes, to read, ride a bike. There was this grand sense of “I did it” and we whooped it up! This should not be something that goes away. Thrive Global in an 218

article dated December 13, 2019 gives “10 reasons to celebrate your successes” like it’s a confidence boost, you can use the skills you learned in this achievement for others, you can inspire others around you to celebrate (one of my favorites). Celebrating your achievements is good for you. Celebrating your achievements is good for others. Celebrating others achievements is good for them and you. President Thomas S. Monson said,

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“If you want to give a light to others, you have to glow yourself.” Celebrate come on. Celebrate your accomplishments or successes. It does not matter what they are. It matter’s that you did it. What you achieve and accomplish is important because who you are and what you do matters. May your did it be with you


{ LIFE IN BALANCE }

YOGA AND MOVEMENT AS A TOOL BY KAITLYN VITTOZZI

Have you ever had to listen to a recording of your own voice? I always used to shudder at the thought. My vision would go blurry – thinking “my, voice, my breathing, who breathes like that!? I can’t listen.” My somatic yoga therapy practice changed that. When I do have to listen to a recording of my own voice, what am I really feeling? My stomach churns. If you’re a woman, odds are you have lived through a stomach churn or ten. By naming the sensation in my body, I become bigger than it, and it becomes feasible. “A n y t h i n g t h a t’s h u m a n i s mentionable, and anything that is mentionable can be more manageable. When we can talk about our feelings, they become less overwhelming, less upsetting, and less scary.” – Mr. Rogers I am currently sitting at my kitchen table writing this on day 9 of social distancing. It feels inauthentic not to mention it. While my body is healthy, and I am fortunate not to have lost my job, my shoulders feel heavy from being glued to a laptop each day. I find myself getting short of breath from the emotional weight in the air when I’ve been sitting for too long. The silver lining is that there are currently some awesome yoga classes online from my favorite instructors locally and on opposite ends of the country. Those yoga classes let me experience that weight from my own living room. Noticing when it feels heaviest and when the load starts to lighten. Not sure how that works? Here is a mini yoga therapy session you can do, right from your chair: #1 How are you feeling right now? 220

Name in a word or phrase, no more than a sentence. #2 Seated as you are, bring your feet to the ground and start to wiggle your toes. Scrunch them up, spread them out. If they don’t move, have your hands help them. #3 Then start to roll your ankles around. Let the legs go with them. Sway those legs and hips around gradually getting faster. #4 Run your legs in place as fast as you can for 30 seconds. Let your quarantined housemates laugh at you. #5 Stop. Close your eyes and breathe. #6 Name what you are feeling. What are you feeling in your body right now? Be specific about the raw sensations you are experiencing. Practice the act of being curious without trying to solve anything. For example, if you feel a tightness in your hips, don’t beat yourself up because your hips are tight, just notice it, speak it to yourself and give yourself permission to be where you are at. What does this have to do with empowerment? Mindful awareness of the sensations in our bodies allows us to cut through the mental nonsense story of “I can’t!” and tune it to where we are really at. From there, we can make more conscious decisions. Use your family as an example. Maybe you really love them but find yourself at annoyed at one another during holidays, all that build-up just to disappoint. Good news for you, Easter 2020 dinner is cancelled. Just kidding. While I am still very much a work in progress, I

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try to infuse this mindfulness when I’m with my family because they’re important to me. I love my father dearly, but he always has the TV on full blast, flipping between news networks. My immediate reaction is to say, “CAN YOU JUST TURN THIS THE F OFF UNTIL DINNER IS OVER!?” which I know from experience makes the whole room uncomfortable. Now if I mindfully check in with my body, I feel discomfort in my ears from the TV and a pulsation in my neck. I can choose to deal with that discomfort for the next few hours. Mindfulness can help not just with conflict, but in allowing us to live a fuller life. Since the gyms have been closed, I started running two miles a few times per week. I’m not training for anything, so there’s no timing or pacing. I have been leaving the house without my earbuds and listening to the sounds of my feet and feeling the burning in my lungs. On the first day of spring it was warm and sunny. Checking in with myself and what I really wanted, I stopped to walk for a little bit. Listening to my body, I spread my arms out wide and felt the sun on the sweat on my arms. It felt like a rush of warmth, and it felt like happiness. And I knew when I went back to my home, to sit at the kitchen table, the day would be a little bit better. Kaitlyn Vittozzi is a Therapeutic Yoga Teacher, currently completing her Yoga Therapy Practicum. To schedule an in-person or virtual session email Kaitlyn@tozziyoga.com or follow her on Instagram @tozzi_yoga.


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{ MIND, BODY, SPIRIT }

YOGA! YOGA! YOGA! THE SPIRITUAL & THE PHYSICAL BY ALANA CAHOON

Breathe. Stretch. Repeat. Sounds like you’re washing your hair, right? Close. You’re washing your body. Inside out. I’ll never forget being introduced to yoga back in the 1980’s. A long haired hippie dude was teaching at a gym in NYC. He wasn’t very good. That experience turned me away from the practice for awhile. I was a modern dancer at the time and practiced hard core aerobics. I didn’t need to add yoga to the mix.

centers of the body. These are aligned along your spine, the first located at the base moving up to the seventh at the crown of your head. In addition to balancing these energy centers during meditation, they can also be activated during the physical aspect of your yoga practice. Some say the practice of yoga began approximately 5000 years ago in India. My course of study suggests less it dates back to the 2nd century BCE with the Yoga Sutras of Patanjala, the foundation for the

Today, I couldn’t imagine living without it. Yoga the spiritual and the physical. That’s the beauty of it. There are meaningful aspects of the practice that bring about a range of health benefits. And that’s what is needed today. More than ever.

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reading, you may want to engage in a book on the traditions such as the Bhagavad Gita or the Upanishads or Yoga Sutras. If you’re a visual learner, check out videos available online. Start with a simple search of Yoga and go from there. The spiritual side of yoga is found within its meditative practice. This elevates the conscious state to one that is clear and in divine union, ultimately bringing one to a sense of absolute freedom. Ommm. PHYSICAL I believe that the physical aspect of yoga is just as important as the spiritual side and vice versa. A balanced mind body and spirit involves the activation of all. Typically a yoga class is focused on the asanas. These are the physical poses of yoga. These poses can be held for several minutes which are often found in the yoga teaching of Iyengar. Or they can move from one to the next in a flowing series which can be found in the Vinyasa style.

SPIRITUAL The spiritual aspect of yoga is found within its philosophy and meditative practice. The aim being to unite one’s spirit with the Divine. Doesn’t that sound amazing? The meditative practice of yoga is equivalent to samadhi or concentration which brings about self awareness.

practice. These were brought to the West in the 20th century. Hatha yoga, which is the form we are most familiar with in the US emerged in India around the 10th century with origins in tantra.

As a teacher, I like to begin classes by setting an intention. This acts as the theme throughout the session and is frequently aligned with your spirit such as, ‘I feel calm and relaxed.’

‘What?’ You may be asking. No worries. Meditation is the first step to the spiritual side of yoga. Understanding its roots and beliefs of origin are the next.

Hatha yoga is the overarching style predominantly taught in the west. Vinyasa, Iyengar, and even Power yoga are all under its umbrella.

You may have heard of balancing the chakras. This is something I have been doing for most of my life. It’s a beautiful sequence of activating the 7 main chakras or energy

You may be fascinated to learn more. If so, there are dozens of books and videos available on the subject. I suggest you peruse several and see what’s a fit. If you learn best by

A well rounded yoga class will include focus on the breath, the asana and the concentration. These aspects will stretch and strengthen your mind, body, and spirit.

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As a dancer, which do you think is my favorite? Right. Vinyasa!


{ MIND, BODY & SPIRIT } “Breathe. Stretch. Repeat. Sounds like you’re washing your hair, right? Close. You’re washing your body. Inside out.”

Today there are numerous yoga studios both in brick and mortar and online. Circling back to my first encounter with yoga, may I suggest not to give up if at first you don’t like the experience. The teaching style, environment and/ or personality of the instructor have an impact on your personal experience. Find some one who speaks to you. In mind - body - spirit.

Half Moon - Ardha Chandrasana Half Spinal Twist - Ardha Matsyendrasana Headstand - Sirsasana Head-to-Knee - Janusirasana Locust - Salabhasana Lotus - Padmasana Low Plank - Caturanga Dandasana Mountain - Tadasana Pigeon - Kapotasana

Here are some of the yoga poses you may learn. I’ve noticed that depending on the source, the names may differ slightly. The first word is the basic English name. The second is the Sanskrit name. Have fun saying them and doing them! Asanas - Yoga Poses Boat - Navasana Bow - Dhanurasana Camel - Ushtrasana Cat - Marjariasana Chair - Utkatasana Child - Balasana Cobbler Bhadrasana C o b r a Bhujangasana Crescent Moon - Anjaneyasana Crocodile - Makarasana Crow - Kakasana Dancer - Natarajasana Downward Facing Dog - Ardho Mukha Shvanasana Eagle - Garudasana Easy - Sukhasana Fish - Matsyasana Garland - Malasana 224

Standing Half Forward Bend - Ardha Uttanasana Sun Salutation - Surya Namaskar Tortoise - Kurmasana Tree - Vrikshasana Triangle - Trikonasana Upward Facing Dog - Urdhva Mukha Shvanasana Warrior 1 - Virabhrasana I Wide Stance Forward Bend - Prasarita Padottanasana Yogi vs Yogini As a man who practices not only the physical but the philosophic aspect of yoga is considered a Yogi. For all you women out there on the path of yoga, you are on your way to being called a Yogini. Alana Cahoon is the founder & creative coach of Grow 2 B U, LLC. Grow your business. Expand your mind. Heal your soul. www.AlanaCahoon. com

Plank - Phalakasana Plough - Halasana Pyramid - Parshvottanasana Seated Forward Bend - Paschimottanasana Shoulder-stand - Sarvangasana Shoulder Supported Bridge - Setu Bandha Sarvangasana Side Angle - Parshvokanasana Side Plank - Vasishtasana Staff - Dandasana Standing Forward Bend - Uttaasana

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{ VISIONARY MINDS }

ARISSA “QUEENRI” JOHNSON BY TAMMY REESE

Arissa Johnson was raised in the heart of The Bronx, NY. I learned entrepreneurship from my parents and at six years old I was designing, creating and selling earrings. I loved the excitement I felt by earning money from my hobby. My parents and I would vend at different flea markets and events throughout New York City. As a pre-teen I modeled in several fashion and hair shows. This helped fuel my passion, increase my confidence and made me feel beautiful inside and out. I dreamed of one day owning my own clothing line and being able to style people and give them that same feeling. I moved to Syracuse, NY in 2002, and graduated Nottingham High School in 2003. While attending College in 2006 I became pregnant with my first child and left school in my final semester due to complications. In 2011, I earned my Associates Degree in Humanities/ Liberal Arts from Onondaga Community College. I took many business courses at Southside Innovation Center and completed Entrepreneurship bootcamp at The Syracuse University Whitman School of Management. Although I no longer had the time to make jewelry, the passion and drive to start my small business was great. I wanted to give more to my daughter and be able to leave a legacy. QueenRi’s Accessories was started in 2013 with a Hundred dollars and a dream. I purchased earrings and began 228

hosting jewelry parties and pop up shops around the city to get my name out here. I began to get excited when I noticed women were loving my products and telling their friends about me. Because of my love for fashion I decided to

expand and converted my business into QueenRi’s Boutique in 2016. I chose African fashion first because I am a Black, West Indian and Puerto

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Rican. I have always been proud of my heritage and want to showcase that. I want to celebrate us and our culture and help others like me feel proud. I want my customers to turn heads when they walk into a room. As a stylist I handpick one of a kind pieces and deliver them to my customers creating a total experience and this is what makes my Boutique unique. Customers select pieces from the comfort of their home before making their purchase. It also allows for me to get to know them for the future; many of them are return shoppers and word of mouth referrals. I am grateful for the amazing people I have met so far on this journey. In addition, I have attended several vending events like The Syracuse Black Expo where I am a proud board member and vendor coordinator, and The Watertown Juneteenth to name a few. In 2019 I was the backstage assistant for New York Summer Fashion Explosion fashion show in New York City. I assisted with runway operations and model wardrobe changes including Celebrity actress Karina Seabrook of Mob Wives. I co-coordinated fashion shows for the NYS Winter Fair in Syracuse, NY in 2019 and 2020 and was able to showcase my Boutique. QueenRi’s Boutique is a one stop fashion shop that sells African Clothing, accessories, African Black soap, African raw shea butter, sage smudge sticks, all-natural toothpastes, soaps, incense, oils and more. Back in November I


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I started a GoFundMe Campaign to Help QueenRi’s Boutique Go Mobile. I want to be able to purchase a bus and take my fashion business on the road. I would be able to attend different events throughout the city, as well as travel to different states while meeting new people along the way. It is truly a desire of mine to help uplift my people through expression of beauty and fashion. I love the feeling when I see my customers 230

strutting and feeling fabulous. I have built so many great friendships and partnerships while doing what I love and to me that’s the biggest reward. I am now a mother of two daughters, and I make sure to be a great example of how far love, compassion, empathy, drive, hard work, purpose and dedication can get you in life. I teach them to go hard for what they want in this world. Where I shine the brightest is in my desire

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to educate, motivate and empower. I will always make sure to reach my hands back to help comfort, guide, nurture and support with love and light. To contact Arissa “QueenRi” Johnson Email: ari.johnson24@yahoo.com


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{ SAUNIFIED }

SAUNAFIED INFRARED SAUNAS BY EVELYN SPRUILL

CREATE AN ALL OVER SENSE OF HEALTH AND WELLBEING Want to get in on a new upcoming way to improve and benefit your health while relaxing? Infrared saunas are becoming more and more popular. There are articles in newspapers, health magazines, podcasts, newscasts and talk shows. Infrared saunas are up to seven times more effective in releasing toxins than a traditional sauna. The infrared saunas heat is absorbed by your body before it heats the air aiding in the release of toxins through sweat and giving its user an overall sense of relaxation and well being.

Far infrared rays are the invisible light waves from the sun that warm our bodies directly, without heating the air. They penetrate deep into our body making us feel warm, energized and healthy. We can experience far infrared rays on a cold cloudy day. When the sun comes out we become warm, when the sun disappears we once again

Who doesn’t need a quiet hour to themselves to unwind? Infrared sauna therapy helps you relax while getting an invigorating deep tissue sweat, leaving you fully refreshed, rejuvenated & renewed. Unlike traditional saunas, infrared saunas provide a gentle, soothing therapeutic heat that promotes relaxation & improved sleep. The Experience – How does it feel

become cold. The air temperature did not change at all. We became warmer in the sun due to the rays. Saunafied is Born Evelyn Spruill opened Saunafied, an infrared sauna spa, in 2017 to compliment her massage business. Spruill (founder of Nurturing Hands Massage and Saunafied) has been a practicing licensed massage therapist

for over 20 years. She says, “I learned about infrared saunas from my brother who suffered from Morgellans’s Disease. In 2015 he suggested buying one to use at home with my husband who was diagnosed with Parkinson’s Disease. I educated myself on the many benefits of infrared saunas and decided that many of my clients would also benefit from them. In 2017 I bought my first infrared sauna. My clients began boasting about the effects the sauna had on them, so in 2019 I decided to add a second, larger sauna.. Now my saunas draw people looking for relief from everyday stresses as well as those who seek the health benefits to help them handle chronic illness and pain.” Spruill adds ”many of my clients enjoy spending time in my saunas with their spouse, or a group of friends. The larger sauna can accommodate up to four persons. I also offer make your own packages. Clients can select using the sauna and then adding on a massage, chair massage, reiki session, or YoMassage”. This can make a fun afternoon or evening for a small group. INFRARED SAUNA’S #1 BENEFIT IS DETOXIFICATION

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{ SAUNIFIED } “Infrared sauna therapy helps you relax while getting an invigorating deep tissue sweat, leaving you fully refreshed, rejuvenated & renewed.”

The main benefit of regular use of infrared saunas is to aid in detoxification. Due to today’s high levels of stress and toxicity the body’s natural ability to heal is often compromised. Some of us have reached critical stress and/or toxic levels and we do not have the energy to detoxify or repair our bodies. As humans, we all have dangerous toxins stored in our bodies, including pesticides and mycotoxins. We retain these toxins in our bodies’ fatty tissues, including breast milk, the liver, and blood plasma. When we are unable to rid our bodies of these toxins, they stockpile and eventually we become sick. Most of these environmental toxins are known to contribute to a whole host of diseases, including cancer, arthritis, autoimmune disease, autism, fibromyalgia, cardiovascular diseases, Alzheimer’s and more. Unlike traditional saunas which heat the air, an infrared sauna uses light to heat your body in much the same way the sun does. Because far infrared sauna therapy heats the body directly rather than simply warming the air, it raises the core body temperature and produces a deep, detoxifying sweat at the cellular level, where most toxins reside. Your sweat then pushes out the toxins, cleansing your body and rejuvenating your skin. While most sweat is comprised of water and a little salt, 15-20% of infrared sauna-induced sweat is composed of cholesterol, fat-soluble toxins, heavy metals, sulfuric acid, ammonia, sodium and uric acid. Recently Far Infrared Sauna Therapy has begun to be included in detoxification programs by many

healthcare professionals worldwide. INFRARED SAUNA USE TO BOOST AND ENHANCE YOUR IMMUNE SYSTEM The cold, flu and viruses don’t discriminate. We wash our hands, take our vitamins, & avoid germs the best we can, but without a healthy immune system you are vulnerable. Every infrared sauna session helps boost your immune system to keep it strong & fighting. Infrared heat is the invisible part of the sun’s spectrum, which has the ability to gently and comfortably penetrate human tissue to produce a host of health benefits like boosting your immune system. Stay healthy with the natural preventive properties of Saunafied Infrared Saunas which aid in cell health and overall increased immunity. Saunafied infrared therapy stimulates the circulatory system, causing the heart to beat more vigorously and blood vessels to dilate, which help cleanse the circulatory system and more fully oxygenate the body’s cells. Better blood circulation means more toxins flow from the cellular level to the skin’s surface to improve cell health and strengthen the immune system. Each infrared sauna session raises your core temperature inducing an artificial fever. A fever is the body’s natural mechanism to strengthen and accelerate the immune response, as seen in the case of infection. Raising core body temperature is key. Although Saunafied saunas heat you up differently than a fever, the increased

body temperature provides the same benefits, including white blood cell and T-cell production to ward off viruses. Our saunas have the ability to raise core body temperature .This enhanced immune system, combined with improved elimination of toxins and wastes via intense sweating, increases your overall health and resistance to disease. Not only will you come out of every session glowing on the outside, but you’ll be stronger on the inside. PROMOTES A SENSE OF WELLBEING Saunas have been traditionally used to produce a feeling of relaxation. The heat helps to relieve physical and emotional tension in your muscles, including your face and neck muscles, by triggering the body’s parasympathetic nervous system. This relaxation effect is also a huge benefitsto using a n infrared sauna. When you are relaxed, your energy levels increase, and you sleep better at night — thus, increasing your sense of well-being. Visit Saunafied and give a healthy sweat a try. You will find out why infrared saunas are so popular. With Infrared Saunas, massage and wellbeing classes Nurturing Hands Massage and Saunafied may soon become your favorite health spa. We are located at 640 Kreag Road Pittsford ( in Bushnells Basin ) www. PittsfordMassageAndSauna.com


{ GIVING BACK AT RGH }

“WHAT CAN I DO?” BY BECKY PICONE

SOME THOUGHTS ON THE QUESTION –

In a 2018 Volunteering in America report ranking all US cities for their volunteerism, Rochester came in second, with 45.6% of residents donating their time and talents in some way (see the full report at VolunteeringInAmerica.gov). This ranking is a reflection of Rochester’s rich history of philanthropy and volunteerism. Rochester was home to many communityminded legends such as Frederick Douglass, Susan B. Anthony, and George Eastman. It is no surprise that when faced with a crisis, the people of Rochester respond with “What can I do?”. As our community and communities around the globe respond to the COVID-19 pandemic, here are some practical ways that you can participate in the healing work and mission before us all with Rochester General Hospital. • RRH COVID-19 Support Fund: One of the best and quickest ways that you can help right now is to give to the RRH COVID-19 Support 238

Fund. Monetary donations to the COVID-19 Support Fund give our hospital leadership the flexibility to allocate help where it is needed most. Visit: Give.RochesterRegional.org • Restaurant gift cards - Hospital leadership teams can order meals before and after long shifts for front

line care providers to take home. If you are interested in donating food to RRH to support the clinical teams, please email Julie.hamil@rochesterregional. org. *Please note: Food must be prepared in a commercial-grade kitchen and packaged in individual servings • Send encouraging messages to patients – Using social media, you

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can post videos and photos with #RRHspreadjoy, and we’ll share them with patients and caregivers who could use a smile. You can also send your messages to rrhfoundation@ rochesterregional.org. • Send encouraging messages to caregivers/staff: Health care teams can also use your support! Send messages to rrhfoundation@ rochesterregional. org Mr. Fred Rogers once said, “When I was a boy and I would see scary things in the news, my mother would say to me, “Look for the helpers. You will always find people who are helping.” How fortunate that Rochester is a community where you don’t have to look very far. If you are interested in becoming a part of the Rochester General Hospital volunteer community, please visit RochesterRegional.org/ makeadifference.


{ VISIONARY MINDS }

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{ HER EDGE }

ZOOM BY ROBIN DEWIND

I was taking my puppy Ted for a walk in the neighborhood and I passed by a mom hula-hooping with her young daughter. It made me stop and smile. I wondered if we were not in the middle of a global pandemic if that woman would have ever been in her driveway at two o’clock in the afternoon trying to recreate what I’m sure she was highly skilled at when she was seven years old.

questions about how our “quaran-teens” were adapting to ‘home school’. It quickly turned into questions about bras and their necessity, and how often we were washing our hair and had anyone watched “Tiger King”. The content moved to goofy online videos, polls about how often we showered, inspirational quotes and pictures of wine. One friend was deciding if a pandemic was

I was doing things I would never normally do as well. I went on YouTube to see how to make homemade hand sanitizer. I cut my own bangs, wore the same sweat pants for two straight days before noticing and I went to a convenience store to overpay for toilet paper because I was actually out, not to stock up. Wine is officially a crutch and all attempts to be structured and disciplined about my eating choices are out the window.

The group text message started with general

We talked about having college aged kids home and why they stay up until all hours of the night. We vented about having to cook all of the time, our dread when it came to grocery shopping. We admitted that although we were not going into work or set the alarm, we still could not sleep; that’s when the real conversations began. We were all trying to cope with this “new normal” that had been forced upon us in a matter of days. “TogetherAlone” is a hash tag I’ve seen so many times since we started living socially isolated. This was the first time I understood what it meant.

Like all of us, I was growing increasingly anxious and impatient. In the middle of week two of, “How much longer is this going to go on for”, a group text from my basketball moms popped up on my phone. Our daughters all played together since elementary school and as a result, and over the years we all became friends. Sitting for hours in the bleachers, weekend tournaments, car pools, and fundraisers is how we got to know each other. Divorce, career changes, illness and loss was how we became friends.

makeup, and roots showing.

a good time to get a puppy.

We all felt out of control. As women we run ourselves, the house, and our kids. Now we are disconnected from the outside world and deeply anxious about all of the unknowns. We are worried about our health, finances, our parents, our kids. No matter what kept each of us up at night, it was a relief to know we all felt the same uneasiness.

One mom, (who is a teacher) took the initiative to turn our sophomoric conversations into a “Zoom” meeting; she gathered our emails, and sent the code and at six o’clock on a Wednesday, she created our virtual happy hour.

We may have been self-isolating, but we were not alone.

There we all were, cocktails in hand squeezed into little square boxes; sweatpants on, no

One by one, and on their own, they started to find us.

Just as we were all talked out, a second date was set and we attempted to log off, our daughters showed up.


{ HER EDGE } “she gathered our emails, and sent the code and at six o’clock on a Wednesday, she created our virtual happy hour.”

I guess they were done being isolated too. They all said hello and we all had a good laugh about the whole crazy situation. We took a picture that looks a lot like the Brady Bunch intro to save for a time when we can all look back. We wanted this behind us, but it was our daughters who had united us once again by helping us adults appreciate the moment at hand. My thoughts on how to cope with this whole situation changed that night. Every experience in life is relevant and this one we are all sharing should rank as one of the most. I’m in a home I’ve built with the people I love most. I am healthy and lucky to be alive and grateful for this pause in time to sleep, breathe, walk and read. I used to constantly complain to anyone who would listen that all I wanted was a night in, to relax, have a glass of wine by myself and watch my Netflix! I was always annoyed about having no time. I was just too exhausted to get the “really important things” done. Well, I got my wish. The hallway closet is organized, laundry is done and I’m all caught up on my TV shows. At a time when I’m supposed to be staying away, I’m going to move closer. My hulahooping days are over, but I have a yard and my daughter’s out there in it, so I think I’m going to join her. Be well, stay patient, take in the moment. fundraisers is how we got to know each other. Divorce, career changes, illness and loss was how we became friends. The group text message started with general questions about how our “quaran-teens” were adapting to ‘home school’. It quickly turned into questions about bras and their necessity, and how often we were washing 246

our hair and had anyone watched “Tiger King”. The content moved to goofy online videos, polls about how often we showered, inspirational quotes and pictures of wine. One friend was deciding if a pandemic was a good time to get a puppy.

Just as we were all talked out, a second date was set and we attempted to log off, our daughters showed up.

One mom, (who is a teacher) took the initiative to turn our sophomoric conversations into a “Zoom” meeting; she gathered our emails, and sent the code and at six o’clock on a Wednesday, she created our virtual happy hour.

I guess they were done being isolated too. They all said hello and we all had a good laugh about the whole crazy situation. We took a picture that looks a lot like the Brady Bunch intro to save for a time when we can all look back. We wanted this behind us, but it was our daughters who had united us once again by helping us adults appreciate the moment at hand.

There we all were, cocktails in hand squeezed into little square boxes; sweatpants on, no makeup, and roots showing. We talked about having college aged kids home and why they stay up until all hours of the night. We vented about having to cook all of the time, our dread when it came to grocery shopping. We admitted that although we were not going into work or set the alarm, we still could not sleep; that’s when the real conversations began. We were all trying to cope with this “new normal” that had been forced upon us in a matter of days. “TogetherAlone” is a hash tag I’ve seen so many times since we started living socially isolated. This was the first time I understood what it meant. We all felt out of control. As women we run ourselves, the house, and our kids. Now we are disconnected from the outside world and deeply anxious about all of the unknowns. We are worried about our health, finances, our parents, our kids. No matter what kept each of us up at night, it was a relief to know we all felt the same uneasiness. We may have been self-isolating, but we were not alone.

ROCHESTER WOMAN ONLINE :: EMPOWERMENT EDITION 2020

One by one, and on their own, they started to find us.

My thoughts on how to cope with this whole situation changed that night. Every experience in life is relevant and this one we are all sharing should rank as one of the most. I’m in a home I’ve built with the people I love most. I am healthy and lucky to be alive and grateful for this pause in time to sleep, breathe, walk and read. I used to constantly complain to anyone who would listen that all I wanted was a night in, to relax, have a glass of wine by myself and watch my Netflix! I was always annoyed about having no time. I was just too exhausted to get the “really important things” done. Well, I got my wish. The hallway closet is organized, laundry is done and I’m all caught up on my TV shows. At a time when I’m supposed to be staying away, I’m going to move closer. My hulahooping days are over, but I have a yard and my daughter’s out there in it, so I think I’m going to join her. Be well, stay patient, take in the moment.


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CONTACT ROBIN DE WIND TODAY! I ROBINDEWIND@GMAIL.COM


{ WOMEN WHO INSPIRE }

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{ THE FITNESS DIVA }

SELF CONFIDENCE BY LAY’LAH

“Being proud of the woman you see in the mirror every morning is something we all want. It all starts with self-confidence” It can be tough to build confidence whithin yourself especially if you’ve been feeling stressed, overwhelmed, or been through situations where you’ve been judged. Getting physically active can be an huge benefit for your confidence! Every time you make a

choice to improve your health, increase your strength or focus your mind, you empower yourself. You are building a stronger body and mind, and most importantly creating a better you! And when you feel those changes and see yourself improving, it can encourage you to keep pushing. Feeling proud of yourself is imortant and just one of many benefits of confidence. It’s time to throw away any insecurities

or fears and Live your best life! Put on that sexy top, that favorite pair of heels you feel great in, or wear that dress you feel awesome in even if it’s just to go to the grocery store. When you look good, you feel good! One of the many ways a feeling good about yourself is making sure you do what’s best for you, and what makes you feel happy!

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{ TRACY TALKS }

DON’T BE SCARED. BE PREPARED. BY TRACY SIMONE

So here we are, just a few weeks into the new year and the entire world is on pause. Things that just a few short weeks ago would have seemed impossible have happened and life as we knew it has come to a screeching halt. Well, we’re all in this together and while that takes a little of the sting out of it, it still doesn’t change the fact that somehow, here we are.

Regardless of what we have heard or seen about it, we must consider all options so that we can be prepared for the future. We have local, state and federal government officials disagreeing on how to handle it. We have some cities that are completely locked down and others with curfews as if a virus clocks out at 8:00 pm and reports back to work in the morning.

Although these are uncertain times, some of the basic ‘rules’ still apply. My father always told us not to believe everything that we see or hear… This is still very good advice. Love they neighbor. Yet another thing that we need to be mindful of during these times. Everyone has had a change to their daily lives and some friends and family will have a more difficult time dealing with it than others. Keep an eye out for each other. We are bombarded daily by conflicting messages that are confusing, questionable, and even scary. This, however, is not a time for fear. This is a time for action! Who would have thought that we could go to the store……EVERY STORE, and find empty shelves? Again, some of the basic rules apply here too. Always be grateful for what we have. While this new, and hopefully temporary, way of life has cost many people jobs, money, and unexpected extended time at home, it is a time to reflect. So many people had so much less than us even before this Corona guy showed up. 256

could find the time to do before. Reach out to those you have been meaning to call. Maybe you can finally clean out that closet that has been calling your name. What if the web went down, the power went out, or the water was off for some reason? Plan for what you would do in those events. Virus aside, the global economy is looking pretty sick these days. If you can grab some takeout from a restaurant, that would help the local economy a bit and give you a break from cooking. Sure, you must stay current on what is going on with this virus, but do not stay glued to the tv. That is never a good idea. There are all kinds of information and misinformation out there. So yes, pay attention, but take it with a grain of salt. Let’s look at the big picture and find things that we actually can do right now.

No matter how outrageous some of the stories and responses so far may seem, here we are. We can only work on the things that we ourselves can control. What we need to do is recognize the opportunity that is presenting itself. Out of every crisis or challenging situation in life is a chance to find something positive and to take action. This may be the chance to tackle some of those things you never

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This is a great time to tap into our creative sides. Time to read, write, build, and create. Make sure, if possible, to get outside and get some fresh air too, even if it is just from a balcony. Enjoy the new time with your family. Also, be compassionate. Weddings and graduations have been cancelled. My daughter’s college roommate from the UK has parents who had to get permission from the police to leave their home so they could pick her up at the airport when she had to abruptly move out of her dorm. Some international students are still not able to return home. Through all of this, we need to recognize


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{ TRACY TALKS } “Remember that change is a constant. It is always darkest before the dawn. This too shall pass.�

that there is divinity and beauty present still. We were given an opportunity (possibly a second chance) to rethink how we were living. Should we really destroy the forests and dump trash into the oceans? Should we be wearing and using things when, in reality, a child on the other side of the world was the 260

one who had to make them? Since the restrictions have been put in place, the pollution level has been lowered. By the way, the grocery stores are generally still carrying the food that is good for you. A lot of the packaged GMO food is flying off the shelves, but the stuff your body really needs for good health is still

ROCHESTER WOMAN ONLINE :: EMPOWERMENT EDITION 2020

available in most places. Make some healthy choices where you can. Remember that change is a constant. It is always darkest before the dawn. This too shall pass.


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{ PARTNERS IN A JOURNEY }

MUSIC, MUSIC THERAPY AND DEMENTIA BY OLGA MONACELL

I met Kim Best, a board-certified music therapist, in early March, at the Dr. Lemuel and Gloria Rogers Health Symposium-an Alzheimer’s Association event held annually in Rochester, New York. Kim is a classically trained flutist who is also proficient in voice, guitar, and piano. After earning a bachelor’s degree in music therapy at Nazareth College, she received additional training at the Metropolitan Jewish Health System, a large hospice agency servicing the boroughs of New York City.

someone an outside stimulus to grasp onto while it is matched with the person’s energy level, heart rate and respiration. Over time, the music therapist slows down the tempo, volume, and energy of the music to reduce the presence of difficult symptoms associated with dementia. A person may be in pain or may be shouting out but music brings them to a safe, calm, and pain-free place. Q At home, family members sometimes like to listen to the radio while singing

Q. Studies have shown that music may improve behavioral issues of individuals living with dementia. Research also shows that music provides a way to connect with a loved one after verbal communication becomes difficult. Can you share with us your experience working with families impacted by dementia? A. Time and time again, I have seen a family caregiver burst into tears when their loved one sings a favorite song after months of being unable to form a coherent sentence. Often, individuals with dementia can sing entire songs without thinking about the words. Lyrics come out effortlessly, as do family’s tears after witnessing such an event. An individual “comes alive” by tapping their toes or humming along with the song. Sometimes, it is a spontaneous dance to the music. And sometimes, it is just a smile on the individual’s face. What a beautiful thing to witness! Similarly, music therapy helps reduce agitation and other heightened symptoms of dementia. Music therapists play live music and observe how the individual’s body responds. The live music gives 264

accrue continuing education credits and renew our certification every five years. Music therapists provide layers of protection for the people they serve. We utilize evidence-based measures and adhere to a treatment plan. Music therapists are trained to observe responses such as a person’s respiration, heart rate, distress, and mood. Because we are professional musicians playing live music, we are able to manipulate the music to change in accordance with the client’s response. For instance, I sing “Edelweiss” in a slow waltz pace and my client sings along. But if they are singing faster than I am playing, I can easily speed up my tempo to match the client’s voice. I’m giving individuals with dementia control of the music at a time when everything else around them is out of their control. Q How does music therapy benefit those who care for their loved ones with dementia?

and dancing. Is this considered music therapy? A. While music can be inherently therapeutic, there are added benefits to working with a music therapist. Music therapists are professional musicians who have additional training in psychology and medicine. In addition to a four-year degree in music therapy, board-certified music therapists are required to complete a six-month internship and over 1,200 hours of supervised clinical work. After taking the certification exam, we must

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When individuals with dementia sing, it releases dopamine, the “feel good” neurotransmitter. It is safe to say they will likely be more motivated to eat, engage in interactive experiences, and do things that might otherwise be uncomfortable. How helpful that is for a caregiver! On the other hand, music therapy can be provided solely to caregivers. I have worked with caregivers to reduce anxiety and improve mood. Taking someone through a song that has depth and meaning can be a great opportunity for them to voice feelings that are difficult to communicate. Letting someone close their eyes and transport to a different place with a


{ PARTNERS IN A JOURNEY }

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{ PARTNERS IN A JOURNEY } “Unless someone responds poorly or appears to be more agitated by a specific song playing, I believe music is always a good idea. You can play music during meals and bathing.”

contemplative piece of music can bring much-needed relaxation into their day. Q. What can family caregivers do with music during these uncertain and challenging times? A. Unless someone responds poorly or appears to be more agitated by a specific song playing, I believe music is always a good idea. You can play music during meals and bathing. Another idea is to use your own voice and sing. It does not need to sound like you 266

are ready to perform on stage, but using your voice to produce a real human sound impacts the way someone hears music. The music is no longer a separate entity coming through speakers, it is a relationship, a connection. Give singing a try, especially in times that may be extra tough. If you can’t think of any other song, why not try “You Are My Sunshine” or “Somewhere Over the Rainbow”? One other thought is to try moving with music. Hold your loved one’s hand and move it gently with the music, tap a soft beat to

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the song on the individual’s forearm and, if the moment is right, get up and dance! To learn more about music therapy, visit KimBestMusicTherapy.com/blog. For musical inspiration, listen to Music Moments, a collection of new recordings and unreleased tracks by award-winning artists honoring the emotional connection between music and life’s most important moments that we would never want to lose to dementia. For additional information about Music Moments, visit: alz.org/musicmoments.


If you are caring for a loved one with memory loss or dementia, call the 24/7 Helpline to learn about care options, receive around-the-clock crisis assistance, and get connected to support services in your area:

1-800-272-3900 This program is funded, in part, by a grant from the New York State Department of Health


{ TIME TO FLY LADIES }

#FWI: FLYING WHILE ISOLATED BY DEVON MCLOED

Ladies, I know you feel me when I say this is one CRAY-CRAY TIME. I’m writing this in the last full week in March, about two weeks since it was made abundantly clear that COVID-19 was coming for New York City and the rest of the state like a tsunami. My colleagues and I at the New York City Ballet started working from home last Monday and I’ve only left my house to take a walk or to drop off/pick up laundry. A whole lot has been thrown into light these days (feels like it’s been months already). The unbelievable sacrifice of the essential workers, those stocking shelves, keeping public transit running, scrubbing down surfaces. I see from afar, my friends and their colleagues that work in hospitals, with nowhere near the support in equipment and resources that they need to do their jobs and still doing them anyway. Icons. Legends. Stars. I wish I could send more than just good energy and loving thoughts to these incredible people. They are truly heroes. I’m sure I’m not the only one who has been fighting (or maybe embracing!) the voice in the brain that’s chanting “MUST. BE. PRODUCTIVE.” during this time of social distancing. I know that ever since I graduated NYU I’ve had to basically bully myself into relaxing, as up until 2017 there was never a time I wasn’t procrastinating if I was watching TV or reading for pleasure. Now that I am working from home, which is a 268

blessing by itself, I have found that voice has found a megaphone and a tambourine for maximum effect. Not to mention the articles and posts and Instagram stories that are showing me the hundreds of things I could be doing to be productive. “Write a novel, Devon! Do 100 push-ups, Devon! Bake a perfect loaf of bread, Devon!!!!” While I am so inspired by the creativity I was seeing coming up on my social media feeds, all that pressure can be

STRESSFUL, HENNIES! After the first few days of social distancing, I realized what I absolutely needed to focus on was reaching out to my people. I made sure to stay connected with my coworkers as we got through our first week of remote work, spent time with my savior of a roommate, and talked to my family everyday. Having these connections was key to starting this indefinite period of self-isolation off with a strong foundation. I would suggest if you are feeling alone, try

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to find even one person, a co-worker, a parent, a college friend, to reach out to and have a conversation with once a day. I literally set reminders for myself so I don’t go too long without connecting with my people! These little chats have been like life jackets for me and hopefully if you haven’t already, you find integrating these check ins to be beneficial. Ladies, I’m not going to share a long list of “ways to be productive” that include things like “make check lists!” and “create a chore wheel!” because I know there are many other people who have made plenty of those lists that would likely be more useful than mine. Instead, I’m going to share a short list of things I’ve done during this period of self-isolation that have made me feel accomplished. Maybe you’ll be inspired, and if not I hope you at least get a giggle out of it. Stay strong, ladies. We’ll make it through this if we band together by staying apart. And please, don’t feel like a failure if you take this time to do just that: to simply take some time. You deserve a rest. Now let’s fly (and stay inside)! Things Devon Considers Productive During Quarantine: -Binge watch the entire Daniel Craig James Bond franchise with your roommate. You won’t regret it.


{ TIME TO FLY LADIES }

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{{ TIME TIME TO TO FLY FLY LADIES LADIES } } “Stay strong, ladies. We’ll make it through this if we band together by staying apart.”

-Do a hair mask. Hydration during isolation! -Home décor! Have a piece of art or some pictures that’s been sitting on your floor for months? Now’s the perfect time to put it up, who wants to stare at blank walls all day? -Take a nap. If you’re anything like me, 270

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you have a lot of sleep to catch up on. -If you’re lucky enough to still have them, call your grandparents and your parents. Even 5 minutes of connection can change the course of their day and yours! -Get into a new genre of movie/TV. I have NEVER liked horror of any kind and I just finished American Horror

Story Coven. Best decision. -Put on a new outfit every weekday. If you don’t consider this productive, you haven’t changed from sweat pants to yoga pants for the first time in days and felt like a new woman. To contact Devon email : devon@nyide.com


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{ GOT A MINUTE? }

GOT A MINUTE? BY KIERSTYN ZAYKOSKI

Got a minute? I’m certain you have had more minutes than you are used to having in this current unprecedented time. Social distancing, quarantining, the constant information from the media, all these things have an ability to mentally and emotionally tax even the most level headed people. So how have you dealt with the change? Let me share a bit about how I have spent the increased time. First, moving. I am a professional dancer, so you might say, of course, that isn’t a problem for you! This is true. However, the increase in our online clients through the New York institute of Dance & Education during this time has meant I have been moving more in our daily schedule than I’ve spent in meetings recently. Moreover, when I say moving, I also mean not getting held up in one space in my house. Working in a home office, it makes it easy to feel stagnant, to feel alone, trapped. So I have taken an hour or so each day, and worked from a different place in my house, or even outside if the weather is nice. Just a simple change in perspective lifts my mood, my heart, and increases my productivity. Just the other day I spent most of my time out on my sun porch. I shifted all of my tutoring materials, projects, and technology to the porch and found it completely refreshing. Seems simple, but I hadn’t done that. Also, I get dressed up and have a virtual party - just cuz! Now, I am definitely not opposed to a jammies and sweats day. Even during my normal schedule, on my days off I will relish the sweats. However, I’m getting creative. My sister and I are currently

in the works of helping my mother and Grandmother download Zoom so we can still have Family Easter while we are all separated by distance - and that includes us each still making lasagna so we can have our traditional family meal. I’ve also relished this time to talk with people I seemingly never have enough time to fit into my dawn to midnight schedule. I’ve picked up the phone and called my family, video chatted with friends, and

even downloaded a new app to stay in touch. Since everyone is home right now, we all have more time, so I’m truly using it to re-establish that connection like we haven’t in years. My best friend introduced me to an app called “Marco Polo” which is a video chat app that allows you to either send live video if you are both on, or leave video messages to check back in when you are available. This has allowed me to stay in touch with her, and her baby girl even when our schedules might not be perfectly aligned.

One personal reminder is, I had to remember to allow myself to know that my emotions are valid in this time. Hell, all the time. It is ok to cry or feel afraid, if only for a few seconds. I have felt waves of strong emotion that I haven’t felt that strong in years. However, there are positives in all of this. While it has been physically distancing, I have been more socially connected because I have chosen to be. And I’ve learned, I ultimately had made the decision I was too busy before, or allowed those I love to tell me that. Well, no more. This is something I will not allow to change when other things start to resume. I have danced with our international family multiple times a week because we are all free at the same time, I have talked with loved ones on the west coast almost daily. I have attended my favorite church services from Upstate from the comfort of my own house, which I normally only get home to do once a year or so. I am reading more, cooking more, and believe it or not, actually saving MONEY because I am not frequenting Wegmans daily! There are so many things. So I am choosing to look on the enlightened side. Things do happen to you in life, and this is not going away tomorrow, but your pain, anxiety, and anger can. If we have to do this, let’s do it well, and let’s be well! Until next time, be sure to ask yourself, “Got A Minute”? (Okay okay, we all know the answer) To contact Kierstyn Email: kierstyn@nyide.com

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{ A WOMAN’S PERSPECTIVE }

THEN IT HAPPENS. BY GIOVANNA WALTON

This is not the topic I originally wrote about! I found a better one. The original was regarding the virus and the myths around. It also talked about what people should have been doing all along as far as sneezing, coughing and washing their hands. Boring and who cares, we’ve heard enough about this thing. I found another topic even more interesting and something that is important enough to address. It is a very touchy subject for some because it deals with rape. A subject that creates all kinds of feelings and emotions to ALL people in some way, shape or form. Please read this with an open mind. After reading this, my goal and intention is to enlighten others of the red flags and to also make better decisions. It started in a group post I belong in. The woman was having an argument with her boyfriend about something that happened when she was a teen. She was asking the opinion of the group. When she was a teenager, (she doesn’t say her age), she willingly skipped school to hang with a boy that she liked, from school. She told him before she even left that they were NOT going to have any type of sex and for him not to expect it. He was alone at his house. (Do you see where this is going?). Mind you, she’s NEVER been alone with him nor has she ever been to his house. She takes a bus to get there. She arrives and they have small talk. They talked about school and other random things. He started kissing her. It didn’t alarm her because they’ve kissed before. She already told him no sex so she felt she was safe, until he pulled her pants down. She asked what he was doing and she reminded again about not having sex. He tells her he knows and that its ok and continues 274

to feel her above the waist and tells her that’s all he’s doing. She thinks nothing of it because she said she technically never said he couldn’t do that. Harmless right? Then it happens. The panties come down. She tells him no and tries pulling them back up. He continues, holding her arms down while he accomplishes what he intended to do. She tells him to stop again. In her mind she’s thinking maybe he’s thinking she’s playing hard to get. Then it gets real. She starts to cry because he’s not stopping. She tries pushing him off and he tells her shhhhh, it’s ok. When he’s done, he apologizes and she’s upset. Then reality hits. She said, ‘I feel like it’s my fault because i skipped school and was going there knowing he was alone. Or was it really his fault? Should I have been more firm in the beginning? Was it just a stupid misunderstanding because it’s not worth reporting and ruining someone’s life over it!? She couldn’t go to that same school after it happened. Later she noticed the physical affects that happened every time his name was mentioned. Years later she recognizes him. She was at work and he happened to be in a semi at a stop sign in front of her work. What she thought was dormant and healed came back like a hurricane. She tried to act normal but couldn’t. She started shaking and feeling sick only this time she freaks out. She’s crying uncontrollably while her co-workers try to figure out what’s happening. She relives it all over again. When she posted this, she asked, ‘What would you call this? Was it rape? A misunderstanding because I did go there knowing what would happen? So I answered her. It’s RAPE and PTSD. She never dealt with it. She carried guilt with her

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because deep inside she knew what it might lead to and she went anyway (her last question). When a person says NO, it’s NO, PERIOD!!!!! My thought? She put herself in harms way. Although this happened years ago, she left herself vulnerable by doing something, like skipping school. It could have turned out worse for her! She knew she shouldn’t be doing that just to go hang out with a boy she liked and didn’t really know that well, ALONE!!! She isn’t responsible for the rape, however she IS responsible for the choices she made. Had she been in school, this wouldn’t have happened. Oh, forgot to mention, this happened to her twice in that same year with a different boy. Her words, not mine. Even as grown women, we still put ourselves in situations like this. Going to bars and dressing like we work the streets. Is that reason to be raped or violated? NO!!! Absolutely not! You just never know what sick person will see that as an invitation and create something delusional in their mind. People don’t think the same way we do! Most of us know what no means! We need to be teaching our youth about situations like this. We need to teach them that THEIR bad choices and or decisions have consequences attached. Some may be undone and some will last a lifetime. When that boy saw that she was willing to skip school to be with him ALONE, HE was probably thinking she’s just saying that she doesn’t want sex but I know she wants it. Look at what she’s doing for me! She’s even taking the bus! He didn’t take her seriously. What’s the moral or the point of all of this!? When we do something we KNOW we aren’t suppose to do, we leave ourselves open to consequences. (What I said in another paragraph). Some may have a lifelong effect and some may teach us a lesson. As a Christian, when we choose


{ A WOMAN’S PERSPECTIVE } “ I found another topic even more interesting and something that is important enough to address. It is a very touchy subject for some because it deals with rape.”

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{ A WOMAN’S PERSPECTIVE } “Before you do anything, THINK first of all the possibilities that could happen. Don’t make yourself crazy doing it either. You know this world is getting more and more selfish and sicker.”

to do our own free will, we leave ourselves open to someone else’s bad intentions. Before you do anything, THINK first of all the possibilities that could happen. Don’t make yourself crazy doing it either. You know this world is getting more and more selfish and sicker. Teach your daughters 276

about things like this and also your sons. Teach them to respect a woman because if they don’t, they could end up with their life ruined because of one selfish moment. I pray this helps someone. Please take care of yourselves during this time. Don’t forget all the positives that came out of

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this! Yes, there are negative things too, too many to list I’m sure. Wouldn’t you rather think of the good?


{ SHIFT+CONTROL }

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{ MANIFESTING YOUR TRUE PURPOSE }

CREATIVITY DURING QUARANTINE: BY LISA WAGNER

The Arts During Times Like These Can Ease Your Mind Historic and challenging times, these are. As I type this, I think about all of you reading this, hoping that you are safe and well. Watching the news is daunting and can overwhelm even the calmest amongst us. I have had to limit the amount of time that I intake of statistics, updates and the like. One of the things that has kept me grounded and accepting of what is has been creativity. There is a beautiful and serendipitous energy when we find creative solutions. For me, I find that time no longer moves. It luxuriates in your moment to listen and just be. That mindfulness can range from simple things to finding ways to make money or being of service during a time when it seems nearly impossible. Cooking for my family during this crisis has been such a godsend. It allows me to be creative with flavors and new ingredients that I’ve had in my pantry for what seems like a lifetime and cook up something new and exciting. (Although there’s been a few clunkers that probably won’t be making a return appearance.) When you have to stretch your mind and come up with something palatable and comforting, it can help you forget about what you just saw on the news or social media. You can’t do both at once effectively. Thank goodness for that! I can’t imagine those clunkers being worse. It has also been a way for our family to spend quality time together as we bond over the meal and what it took to get it on the table. There’s also a deeper gratitude for each precious ingredient and those seated around you. Are you feeling helpless right now? Who amongst us isn’t? When I feel like I am sapped of all my energy from the mental 278

dialogue in my head or from the news anchors, I will break out a piece of paper or my sketch pad and doodle. Just by drawing circles or those 3-D boxes, you can start to feel a powerful but quiet shift in your energy. Your heartrate will slow, as will your breathing. It allows you space to just “be.” These beautiful gaps are created for you to rest in. Dr. Wayne Dyer wrote a book, “Getting in the Gap” that showed how this technique can bring about peace. He has you picture the Lord’s prayer and the gap

in between each word. Once you are resting in that space, you say the word, “Ahhhh.” The reason behind this is that sound is the only one that you can do without any manipulation. Hence why this is the sound in most religious deity names. (Ex: God, Allah, Buddha, Brahma, etc.) This allows us to have a long string of consciousness with the Divine. That’s how it feels for me when I am “in the creative zone.” It’s like you’re connected to something far greater than yourself that wishes you peace and

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oneness. As a kid, do you remember sitting around on a rainy day and coloring in your coloring books? That having that 64-count box of Crayola Crayons was like Christmas in a box. I could do that or even paint-by-numbers until the cows came home. You got lost in the imagination of it. There was one summer as a kid that it rained almost every day in August. By the end of that month, I had not only colored every page of my Road Runner & Wile E. Coyote coloring book, but I then had to go through and outline all of the pages characters with my black crayon. That poor guy was a nub by the 31st. It helped me forget my boredom and I actually looked forward to breaking that book out everyday at the kitchen table to add to the work I had already accomplished. There was a fulfillment to it that I couldn’t have achieved with another day of playing Marco Polo in the pool while my mom yelled at us to stop screaming that danged name anymore. I think she secretly loved how quiet that activity kept us. Doing puzzles can also help ease our minds and help us sharpen our critical thinking and problem-solving skills. My daughter and I, since this quarantine began, have already done about five 1000+ piece puzzles while singing to our favorite music. Not only has it helped our minds to be distracted but it also created a time for us to work together towards a common goal. There might be a little competition involved there, too. I have also become aware that my eye for color gradients has vastly improved. It is so much easier for me to spot areas on my paintings that need a touch more color saturation and where shadows and values change. I never would have imagined that a puzzle would help me do that! I wonder nowadays how many of you are fellow journal keepers? The practice of


{ TRAVELING WITH ROCHESTER WOMAN }

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{ MANIFESTING YOUR TRUE PURPOSE } “Creativity is a healing force like no other. It helps us to get back up when we mentally think it to be nearly impossible.”

noting the day’s events and how you are feeling not only helps you to later recall what happened to you during a given time. It is also a creative way to chronicle your feelings, whether they be frustrations, joys or pain. Recently, I had a close family member in the ICU for a week and in the hospital for another eight days. The first few days were touch and go. I didn’t know how to digest what was happening. It was overwhelming and just plain scary. My go-to in hard times is my trusty journal. I pray that someone is kind enough to burn them after I die without actually reading them. When I go back and read the entries that I made during that first week, I am shocked by what my mind has purposely hidden from me to protect me. It helps me to realize that I am stronger than I know and that I can survive just about anything. I have had times where, as I write, I solve the dilemma at hand not even knowing how I got there. The answer is just sitting on the page. Many times, it is written in a way I don’t recognize and is not in my own handwriting. It’s as if my hand was gently being guided to gift me words of healing. Journaling after a deep meditation can also yield beautiful words of affirmation and 280

loving guidance. In my journal, I also like to draw out my feelings or ideas for future pieces, plans or shows. Sometimes, it’s just a scribble. Other times, it’s quite descriptive and detailed. This spring, I hope to show students during

my Rochester Brainery “De-Stress This Mess: Creating Community Through Art” workshop how to take their own creativity to make a practice for themselves that allows healing through art while on a Zoom call. Students can chat with one another to form a sense of community over being quarantined and scared about

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current events. When we come together during difficult times, we can cultivate a sense of oneness. We can support and love one another in a way that no other medium seems to do. Creativity is a healing force, especially when it is done as a group. It can also lead to your best ideas. Creativity is a healing force like no other. It helps us to get back up when we mentally think it to be nearly impossible. Creating as a community, family or with our closest friends can help us to understand that we are all one; gorgeously connected by a brilliant thread of our own humanity. The best solutions come from a place of ingenuity and a willingness to be vulnerable. When we open ourselves up to what Brené Brown terms as “getting into the arena,” it allows in new and imaginative ideas. It’s where the beauty lies. Use this time of staying hunkered down and safe to explore what getting into that creative arena looks like for you. It might even lead you closer to your greatest calling that has been longing for you to find it. There are ways that you can be of service even in the most challenging times that honors you and all you touch. Wishing the best to you and your loved ones and praying for a creative solution.


{ THRIVING THERAPY }

DEPRESSION PART 2 BY JENNIFER FRARY

MIXING IN ALCOHOL

April is Alcohol Awareness Month so I want to share with you about the relationship between women, depression, and alcohol. Let’s begin with some basics: An alcoholic is addicted to alcohol and addiction is a disease. The appropriate clinical term for “alcoholism” is Alcohol Use Disorder. Not every person who misuses alcohol meets Criteria for a Disorder. Not everyone with Depression who drinks is even a problem drinker. But, there is additional risk for both parties for struggling with the other (i.e.; Depression can lead to problem alcohol use, and vice versa). Alcohol is the most commonly used substance in the United States. According to niaaa. nih.gov “Studies show that women start to have alcohol-related problems sooner and at lower drinking levels than men and for multiple reasons. On average, women weigh less than men. Also, alcohol resides predominantly in body water, and pound for pound, women have less water in their bodies than men. This means that after a woman and a man of the same weight drink the same amount of alcohol, the woman’s blood alcohol concentration (BAC, the amount of alcohol in the blood) will tend to be higher, putting her at greater risk for harm. Other biological differences may contribute as well.” Individuals with depressive symptoms may choose to self-medicate with alcohol. To numb the feelings, escape the hopelessness and helplessness, to stop the voices; there are many reasons given to self-medicate. Repeated self-medication can and often does result in the development of co-occurring Depression and Alcohol Use Disorder. Alcohol is a central nervous system depressant. Right there we can see a relationship between alcohol and depression in our bodies. Alcohol

can cloud memory and increase emotional depression. But it also numbs emotional pain and decreases anxiety. Hazelden, a leader in treatment and research in the field, states that alcohol “provides a chemical cushion to ward off the emotional impact of everyday events.” So what happens when women choose alcohol as a remedy for their day-to-day stressors and emotions, or for managing their depressive symptoms? First, the root of their distress is not addressed. A glass (or bottle) of wine doesn’t make parenting, work, relationships, or household upkeep more manageable in the long-run. Margaritas on the weekends with our girlfriends won’t make Monday-Friday challenges less challenging. Instead, these issues may become more distressing and we feel more helpless, or in need of more alcohol. Alcohol is a short-term gratification with a long-term cost, especially for women with depression. A band-aid, so to speak. Second, physical and cognitive health are negatively impacted. According to womenshealth.gov: Women who misuse alcohol are more at risk of: • Alcoholic liver disease. Women are more likely than men to develop liver inflammation (alcoholic hepatitis) and to die from cirrhosis (chronic liver disease).

cancer by 5% before menopause and 9% after menopause. • Heart disease. Long-term, heavy drinking is a leading cause of heart disease. • Osteoporosis. Long-term, heavy drinking, especially during adolescence or young adulthood, greatly weakens bones, increasing the risk of a broken bone later in life. Depression is also linked to Heart Disease and Cancer. Women have access to a plethora of other coping strategies that are more effective and less risky than alcohol. Of course, men can do them but there is less stigma for women to seek out the following: 1. Therapy. There are therapists, like me, who specialize in working with depression and alcohol use recovery. Having someone to talk to about your stressors and emotions can reduce the reliance on alcohol one has developed over time. Reducing depressive symptoms often makes it easier to reduce alcohol use. 2. Spirituality. Whether this is organized through religious activity or a personal endeavor of meditation, prayer, body movement or energy healing, spiritual practices are short-term efforts with longterm gains. Spirituality also brings hope to the hopeless.

• Brain disease. Alcoholism can cause diseases of the brain, such as dementia and memory loss, by changing how your cells work or by damaging brain cells.

So, ladies, please consider putting down the glass and picking up the phone! Help is available for your depression and alcohol use.

• Cancer. Alcohol can cause several different types of cancer, including breast cancer. The more alcohol you drink, the higher your risk of a cancer caused by alcohol. Just one drink a day can increase your risk of breast

BIO: Jennifer Frary, LMSW is a private practice therapist in Bloomfield, NY. She specializes in helping clients manage anxiety, depression, and addictive behaviors. Learn more at www.thrivingtherapy.com.


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NATIONAL DAYS BY TAMMY VREELAND

National Days - what are they? A glance at your calendar and sometimes you will see an odd thing being acknowledged for the day but you pay it no mind. Seriously, do we need yet another Hallmark induced holiday? Or... are we missing a perfect opportunity for fun, fresh new ideas that not only help us grow as a person but a fun tidbit. Something we can use, to market our own product or simply use as a discussion over dinner or perhaps, even dinner itself? Exactly what is National Day? First of all, the United States only recognizes 10 National Days which are ones like Independence Day, Christmas etc. Then you have National Observance Days like Mother’s Day, Flag Day, etc - there are 44 of those. A presidential proclamation is usually a one day occurrence but the public may pick them up and use to sell a product. Which in turn coins the phrase to most, a Hallmark created holiday. But bear with me... what with work, school, just everyday living, we find ourselves too easily falling into a rut. Who has time to come up with cute and clever ideas to promote ourselves or even entertain the family at night during dinner? Just having dinner where the whole family is gathered for the night, at the same time, is a chore in itself! Asking the same questions on how their day was and talking about yours, is the main course and to be expected. But what to do when the lull comes? 284

That dreaded silence where you know everyone, including yourself, is wondering what is on social media right now! The rule of no phones at the table was a deal you all agreed to but still hard to get completely out of your head. I’m not saying that mentioning what National Day is, will solve the entire lull but it may take a few seconds away. Whatever the case may be, what can we do with National Days? I admit, I myself never gave National Days a passing thought. Sure, once in a while I may have heard someone say it was National something or other day and I’d chuckle but that was pretty much it. Then I was trying to come up with something cute and eye catching that I could put on my Facebook page. Which in turn, would work for my Instagram account. And then, even throw on my Slasher app. could that even be possible? It started out innocently enough, by seeing someone else post that it was National Puzzle Day. Instantly, I thought of a scary movie to coincide with the day and posted it as a suggestion. A cute way, to help with the “celebration” of the day. Being an author of books in the horror genre, it got me thinking that maybe there would be other National days I could use. You know, to help me with the chore of making my social media interesting, different, and hopefully stand out… less of a struggle! Let alone, an interesting conversation starter during dinner!

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On a quest, I went to search the ole reliable internet. Surprisingly enough, within seconds, I found calendars listing each National Day! Not only with one idea but actually each day had several choices, for me to pick and choose! Excited, I would see what National Day it was going to be and then go hunt for a movie (in my case a scary one) that may coincide with the day. I then would simply use it for all my social accounts, as a suggestion to help with the celebration. Granted, some days are harder than others to make fit but it became like a game to me - to make it fit no matter how bazaar or a stretch! It is my goal, it is my challenge and it is fun! Now, how could this possibly work for you? Think about it, a wealth of fresh new daily ideas for you to draw from, right at your own fingertips! Use and abuse them! It not only makes it easier on you but interesting for your audience, whether it be social or family. Think outside the box, in my case I used it for my horror based audience. In your case, the options are endless. You need only to apply it for your needs. As a wife/mom it can be a fresh idea for dinner. So many of National Days are food related, what better way to spice up dinner by using the excuse that it is National such and such day after all, what I fixed for dinner will be our celebration for it! Meanwhile, it just made your life a whole lot easier trying to come up with something different to eat!


{ TAMMY’S TIDBITS } “It started out innocently enough, by seeing someone else post that it was National Puzzle Day. Instantly, I thought of a scary movie to coincide with the day and posted it as a suggestion. A cute way, to help with the “celebration” of the day.”

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{ TAMMY’S TIDBITS } “On a quest, I went to search the ole reliable internet. Surprisingly enough, within seconds, I found calendars listing each National Day!”

As for promoting, have a product to sell? Tie it either to your product or something related to your product. In my case, scary movies were quick and easy to tie to my social accounts and audience. I would simply type in search for scary movies that are related to one of the things listed for that National Day. Think about how many other movie options you have for your own needs, anywhere from romance to comedies.

Did You Know... April 1st... Obviously is April fool’s day (I already have the scary April Fool’s movie in mind for me) but also this year it’s also Childhelp National day of Hope (a good thing to enlighten) another choice is, it is National Sourdough Bread Day (good compliment for dinner)

For the month of April I selected 5 random National Days to whet your appetite, along with some suggestions to get you creative juices flowing... careful, it can become addictive! 286

April 13th... National Scrabble Day, love that game! (Maybe take a picture of your product spelled out on a scrabble board?) National Peach Cobbler Day (ahh perfect excuse for dessert!) April 20th... National Look Alike Day (see, I really like this one because what better way to promote we all are the same?) National Cheddar Fries Day (seriously, serve this with dinner and everybody is celebrating!)

And yet, movies are not the only thing to use. If you want to be creative, make a meme for the day. Or, simply acknowledge it in a post, when nothing else comes to mind. It’s such an easy source of information, to get you to interact with your audience. You can go in so many directions with it. Whether you want to take the high road and use it to enlighten people or the low road to entertain, it is your choice. After all its National Day and you are just doing your part to help acknowledge it. Even leave an open ended sentence suggesting additional thoughts, you’ll be surprised at the interaction you will get.

there is a production company named Palissades “Tartan” that produce scary movies like ‘A Tale of Two Sisters’... see, you can make it work. ;)

April 6th... National Student Athlete Day (a good one for teachers or moms with kids in sports) and yet it is also National Carmel Popcorn Day, not necessarily good for dinner but you can snack on it while watching my movie selection - now see this is where the stretch is... it is also National Tartan Day - I had no clue to what a tartan even was, so I looked it up (there’s your enlightenment, lol) it is a crisscross patterned cloth… uhm ok ...so no movies on that HOWEVER

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April 27th... National Devil Dog Day (ok this is going to be an easy stretch for my audience, lol) but you could do the little cake OR you could enlighten by telling how Devil Dogs was a term German Officers used to describe the ferocity Marines used to fight. As you can clearly see, the options are endless! More importantly, have fun with it! Everyone loves a celebration, even if you only use it for yourself. Treat yourself to National Day, for every day can be a celebration!


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YOUR HIP MUSCLES BY DR. LARRY PESHKIN

The typical American diet is high in foods that cause increased tissue acidity and have high levels of free radicals which may initiate and/or amplify pain and many other conditions, including cancer, heart disease, decreased immunity, diabetes and arthritis. The foods we eat have a dramatic impact on how we feel and our bodies will perform best with quality foods. THE SUGAR CYCLE: Routinely eating products that contain sugar leads to a vicious sugar-craving cycle. - Sugars are absorbed into our blood and travel to the brain. - Sugar in the brain releases a chemical called serotonin that produces a sense of happiness and well-being. - As our sugar blood levels fall due to insulin production and sugar absorption, we move from a hyperactive state to more of a tired, irritable and weak state. - Concentration levels fall, and our cells begin to become acidic. - Our brain then once again sends a message that we need more sugar, and the cycle begins again Decrease consumption of red meat & refined carbohydrates like sugar and white flour - These are easily converted to fat and the byproduct of this breakdown is arachidonic acid - Arachidonic acid and prostaglandins (formed when animal fats and proteins are broken down in the body) are highly pro-inflammatory and intensify pain and

initiate disease throughout the body. - When possible, substitute darker whole grains for refined white grains. Examples include: 100% whole grain bread made without hydrogenated oil, brown rice, whole grain pastas, couscous and others. - Red meat should be limited and may be replaced by fish, especially the cold-water fish such as salmon, mackerel, tuna or herring. These fish also contain a chemical called DHA, which has been shown to increase brain circulation and function. Choose “healthy” oils like avocado, olive, coconut, or canola - Choose your oils carefully. Omega 6 oils are bad- these include the “warm weather Southern oils” of corn, sunflower, peanut and most others. This would also include oils from red meat, dairy products, and shellfish. - Omega 3 oils or “cold weather Northern oils” are better. These would include flax, soy, wheat germ, canola and fish oils. - Olive oil is classified as an Omega 9 and has been shown to have anti-inflammatory properties. It has also been shown to have numerous other biological benefits including the reduction of harmful free radicals. - Avocado oil is primarily an Omega 9 oil and is an exceptional health choice with numerous health benefits including antiinflammatory properties and reduction of harmful free radicals. As a bonus, Avocado oil has higher smoke/flash points than olive oil - making it a better alternative for searing or frying.

- When possible, choose organic, extra virgin oils. “Organic” means that it was grown in pure soil without the use of pesticides, and extra virgin means that it was pressed without the use of heat or chemicals. INCREASE CONSUMPTION OF VEGETABLES AND FRUITS The average American diet contains one and-a-half servings of vegetables and one serving of fruit per day. The minimum recommended daily allowance is five servings of fruits and vegetables. Optimally, we should eat 9+ servings of fruits and vegetables. - High fiber intake improves gastrointestinal function and decreases our risk of colon cancer. - We should ingest 25-30 grams of fiber per day. Good sources of fiber include beans, lentils, fruits, vegetables, whole grains and nuts. - Fruits and vegetables neutralize acids. - Fruits and vegetables are also high in vitamins and minerals, which are necessary for good health. - Fresh fruits and vegetables contain phytonutrients, which are known as the “guardians of health.” - Phytonutrients have been shown to protect us from several chronic diseases including heart disease, cancer, diabetes, hypertension and arthritis.

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GENTLE & HEALING CHIROPRACTIC CARE

Achieve the healthy, active life that you have been missing


2164 HUDSON AVE., ROCHESTER, NY 14617 585-467-7070 I WWW.IRONDEQUOITCHIROPRACTIC.COM


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TAKING CARE OF YOUR SKIN DURING COVID-19 BY CHRISTINA MCDONALD

During this crazy time in which all Med Spa’s or Aesthetic locations have had to close down to try to contain the virus, there has been anxiety around keeping our skin in good health. When we can not rely on Botox, Dermal Fillers, microneedling, lash extensions, Phototherapy and all of our other facial tricks the estheticians and providers offer we need to rely on good nutrition, hydration, and at home skin regimes. I will start with nutrition as the main stay of keeping the largest organ of our bodies in good health. Studies have shown that a woman who consumed good levels of dietary protein, Vitamin A, C, D, and E has less wrinkled skin. Also, those that followed a Mediterranean diet with foods rich in fruits, vegetables, whole grains, beans, nuts, legumes, red wine, fish, and olive oil helps to reduce inflammation and keep skin looking bright. Daily Vitamin C is a natural antioxidant, this is a cancer fighting antioxidant. It has a large role in collagen production which keeps the skin looking young and healthy. This is also the main reason why it is the main ingredient in most antiaging products and serums. It is recommended that we not only ingest Vitamin C but also apply to our skin first thing in the morning in a serum or cream formulation. It also serves as a natural sunscreen to protect skin again UV rays. It decreases cellular damage and help to promote the healing process in wounds. Recommendation is for 1,000mg a day. Vitamin C can be found in citrus fruits, plant-based foods such as broccoli, spinach and strawberries. This also can be taken as a supplement. Vitamin D is mostly gained from sun

exposure. This is an oxymoron as we as aesthetic providers are constantly telling patients protect your skin from the sun. However, we need about 10-15 minutes of day of sun exposure. The sun exposure allows our body to manufacture Vitamin D. This can be achieved with applying the right sun block. This vitamin allows to protect against redness, excessive dryness, wrinkles and rough patches in our skin. Cholesterol on our body’s coverts to Vitamin D when sunlight is absorbed. It is transported to the rest of the body via the liver and the kidneys. This allows our bodies to create more healthy cells. Recommended daily amount is 600 IU. Vitamin E is also a powerful antioxidant. Vitamin E protects the skin from sun damage, by absorbing UV light before penetrating the skin. Minimizing effects of sun damage, thus preventing wrinkles and sun spots. Recommendation is for 15mg in diet daily. Vitamin E can be found in nuts, seeds, almonds, hazelnuts and sunflower seeds. Finally, Vitamin K is essential to the diet for the skin. This helps the body heal through the process of clotting. Vital in stretch marks, spider veins, scars, dark spots and circles under the eyes. Without enough dietary Vitamin K, all of the above processes can appear worse. Recommended daily consumption is 90-120 ug. Vitamin K can be found in foods like spinach, green beans, cabbage, and kale. Maintaining a healthy diet is crucial in having flawless skin. As they say “You are what you eat.” Along with a healthy diet, it is crucial that you are getting the hydration that is needed to fuel your body, to help maintain your metabolism, as well as to hydrate the skin so that it can look dewy and vibrant.

While we discussed that the sun is crucial to the production of Vitamin D, do not mistake that excessive sun exposure will age the skin rapidly. It is important that you are using a physical defense mineral sunscreen. There are so many on the market, what is most important that you have a sunscreen with Zinc oxide. Sunscreen should be applied every two hours to maintain its effectiveness. Elta MD makes a great broad-spectrum SPF that is chemical free and also contains Hyaluronic acid. I always remind my patients that while we may see your skin for an hour or less when you are in our offices, you are with your skin 24/7 and how you treat and manage your at home skin care regime will only enhance our procedures in the office. It is important to wash your face daily, recommended at least twice a day. It is important to exfoliate a few times a week. I recommend that at the very minimum you are applying a daily serum or cream that has Vitamin C, with your preferred physical defense SPF, and finally a moisturizer that will allow your skin to maintain the hydration that is necessary. Especially in our climate, where the winters cause the skin to be very dry. I want to finally remind you, that what worked when you were 25, likely will not work at 40 years old, or 60 years old. Our skin changes as we age, as our diet changes, as our hormones change, and all of these factors need to be taken into consideration in to our home regimes. During this time of change and stress, our skin takes the most beating. Focus on healthy diet and nutrition, along with a consistent home skin care regime. We at Vega MedSpa look forward to addressing all your skin care needs, in the meantime, stay home and stay safe.

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{ ELEVATE YOUR STYLE }

ELEVATE YOUR STYLE BY CASSIDY KNIGHT

E A S Y WAY S T O ELEVATE YOUR STYLE There’s no denying that fashion is one of the best ways we can share our personality and individuality. Unfortunately, the constant need to look one’s best might make you think that you need to buy the latest clothing items to stay in the style game. And while it’s nice to treat yourself to new shoes every now and then, fashion isn’t always defined by trends and expensive garments.

Breuer has previously discussed, budget-friendly clothes can still make you look exceptionally fashionable. The trick here is to pay attention to the fabric of your garments, as they can either make or break your outfits. Start by giving it a good feel. If the fabric’s too thin, that means

If you’re looking to elevate your style, here are some easy ways to do just that. PLAY WITH LAYERS Fashionistas know that there’s more to style than simply pairing two pieces together. Depending on the season, adding more layers will let you get more creative with your look — whether it’s a playful printed blazer from Topshop, or a rugged denim jacket. Of course, you don’t have to limit yourself to outerwear. According to the Huffington Post, you can try joining the new hot trend that is wearing skirts or dresses over pants. The best part is you can make something new with pieces you already own. DON’T JUDGE THE PRICE TAG It’s a common misconception that expensive equates to better clothes. However, as our guest writer Kelly 294

it is likely to break easily and leave you looking sloppy. Instead, opt for fabrics that are wrinkle-resistant, such as cashmere, polyester, and wool. Plus, they add an element of sophistication to your outfits.

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P L AY A RO U N D W I T H SILHOUETTES You’d be surprised how having properfitting garments can completely transform your look. From structured button-downs to wide-leg culottes, each piece has its own particular silhouette, and knowing which shapes work well with your body best can be a game-changer. For instance, the elegant collection of dresses on Woman Within have long and loose cuts, which are flattering on a range of body types. You can choose to accentuate their maxi dresses with a cinched belt, or just keep things simple and breezy. Don’t be shy to play around with forms, as finding the right ones will have you looking effortlessly stylish. INVEST IN STATEMENT ACCESSORIES Last but not least, don’t forget to complete your outfits with some eye-catching accessories to enhance your ensemble. For example, if you’re wearing jeans and a tee, putting on a pair of statement earrings such as these chic hoops from Back to You can help breathe new life into an otherwise plain look. Remember that statement accessories aren’t limited to just jewelry either. Sporting a silk scarf like Banana Republic’s leopard print one can do just the trick too, or even your mom’s beautiful embellished clutch.


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SPECIAL INSERT FEATURING:

RWO SIGNATURE MODELS INDIGO LUXE PHOTOGRAPHY BY CHARLENE MANN & JASON BREESE


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FASHION AT THE BOUTIQUE PHOTOS BY CHARLENE MANN FORD & JASON BREESE

Rochester Woman Online partnered with Indigo Luxe Collections and Valid Girls Boutique last month for a LIVE fashion photoshoot at the RWO’s Boutique Studios in Webster, NY featuring the incredible photography work of Charlene Mann Ford and Jason Breese.

Luxe is your fashion destination. Offering the latest fashion trends at affordable prices and outstanding quality.

VG is honored to have your support and appreciates you being apart of our VG family. VG is dedicated to providing each and every customer with an worldly experience, making one’s over all shopping very special,individual and divine. Valid Girls Fashion & Glam Boutique sells authentic women’s fashion and beauty products. Our business does not provide nor sell used or store modeled products and or services. Valid Girls Guarantee that ALL items are brand new with tags, and in honest and great condition.

INDIGO LUXE It all started with the idea of blending two styles. Indigo earthy, bohemian and free spirit. Luxe sumptuous, classic and sophisticated. We have a passion for helping women discover their unique beauty and innate sense of style. Everything in our collection is an irresistible temptation of boutique styles and artisan jewelry.

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“Fashion is a way of life, a daily ritual, an expressive art” - K’Nai M. Women’s source for high fashion and glam, the ultimate “one stop shop” for all of your lady needs.

Some amazing models got to get creative and show of new fashions for the upcoming season. We are excited to announce that we will be doing this once a month starting in the summer or fall showcasing designers from all over NYS! Feel free to contact me at networkrocqueen@ gmail.com to as me how you can join us.

With an affordable selection of contemporary styles, Indigo Luxe provides a breath of fresh air to your closet. Here, you’ll find no cookiecutter inventory, but rather a special collection of hand-selected items. With new styles added frequently, Indigo

VALID GIRLS FASHION & GLAM BOUTIQUE Luxuries fit for a Goddess.

642 Maris Run Webster, NY 14580 indigoluxecollections@gmail.com 585-764-1806 www.indigoluxecollections.com

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VG is forever expanding & growing and we greatly appreciate your feed back, however . https://validgirls.com/


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ESTATE & FINE JEWELRY

WE DON’T JUST SELL BEAUTIFUL ESTATE JEWELRY, WE COLLECT IT TOO! ESTATE & FINE JEWELRY BY HARRY KRIKORIAN 3025 MONROE AVENUE ROCHESTER, NEW YORK 14618 (585) 453-2860 WWW.KRIKORIANJEWELERS.COM


Profile for Rochester Woman Online

ROCHESTER WOMAN ONLINE April 2020 Empowering Women Edition  

Enjoy the latest edition of Rochester Woman Online featuring Kristin Bauer-Gross, a woman following her dream and empowering everyone to do...

ROCHESTER WOMAN ONLINE April 2020 Empowering Women Edition  

Enjoy the latest edition of Rochester Woman Online featuring Kristin Bauer-Gross, a woman following her dream and empowering everyone to do...

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