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Community Remembering Gloria Kaylie A”H

2-3 Chanukah Lights Up the Town

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WE REMEMBER GLORIA KAYLIE David Mandel, CEO, Ohel Gloria Kaylie passed away. Her physical body and soul have departed, but her dynamic spirit lives on. The Kaylie family name is synonymous with excellence. They lent their name to world-renowned organizations and institutions in Israel and the US, including Shem VeNer Our 6 Million Shoah candle project, Adi Negev, The Hampton Synagogue Tolerance, Yeshiva University, United Hatzolah, numerous yeshivas and hospitals, and Ohel's Camp Kaylie.

Equal to her philanthropic legacy, Gloria herself made an impact. She had an easy-going personality and a warm, ready smile. Her convictions were strong and steady, based on her observing people. This is how she described her perception of a person's values. And values were paramount to Gloria.

Gloria invested in children.

While it is a common refrain to say children are our future, to Gloria there was a deep meaning.

When children learn good values, which come in many forms, they can ultimately create a better world, one of respect and tolerance.

Her math was thereby simple. Good values equal good people. That is an investment one can't purchase in any market or exchange.

Gloria and her husband, Harvey A"H, were different in so many ways, yet shared a bond of goodness stronger than a Kevlar rope. Their financial contribution came with an expectation of a lifetime warranty from the recipient. You, in return, had to demonstrate that their investment was worthwhile. A shared partnership in values, creating a better world for children.

We at Ohel Camp Kaylie were fortunate to have entered the special world of Harvey and Gloria Kaylie. Thousands of children have benefitted from their largesse at Camp Kaylie, learning a unique life lesson: appreciation for how children with special needs contribute to our community. We can only hope that from this beauty there comes forth another Harvey and Gloria.

The mysticism of reincarnation is not easily understood by man. God has plans and we don't understand all, but surely Gloria and Harvey's legacy will breathe life into others with their values, which Gloria would happily observe.

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Dear Readers,

A

fter every yom tov, we try to take a snippet and a scent from the holiday with us as we embark on the next phase of our lives. Each yom tov brings with it an elixir for the next few months, something to imbue our coming days with added spirituality and connectivity.

After Chanukah, we set out on our journeys into the winter, when the days are darker and the nights are longer. But Chanukah gives us the keys to how to navigate this dimmer season.

When we think of Chanukah, many of us will think of the parties and the doughnuts, the get-togethers and the presents.

But truthfully, Chanukah is not about that. The power of Chanukah is in the quiet strength that the Jews had so many years ago. It was about perseverance and determination. It was about moving forward toward a goal that seemed elusive and yet was so very valuable and vital.

And then, when the Jews firmly fought for their morals, resolutely stuck to their standards and fought for what was right, they openly saw the Hand of G-d moving the pieces in their favor.

Nowadays, the traits that the Jews displayed millennia ago can be seen in the flickering flames each night of Chanukah.

These are small flames, but they’re deter-

mined to spread their light. Each day they grow as we add another candle, until the last night is an aura of sanctity, a crescendo of radiance.

Part of the beauty of Chanukah is gazing upon those lights each night, spending time with them as we kindle their flames, sing their songs, relive their lessons. It’s about being present in their presence, connecting with their message, reveling in their significance.

As the days grow darker and the nights become longer, Chanukah reminds us that there is value and importance in gathering indoors, connecting with our families, and strengthening our bond with the One Above. There’s less focus on the outdoors, more time spent with our families gathered round. There’s more time available for introspection and reflection, more moments of connection with our deeper, truer selves. Chanukah reminds us that growth is slow but steady – it’s about quiet, gentle movements towards your goals.

As winter will soon fade away, we hope that Hashem will show us His Hand as openly as He did so many centuries ago, may it come soon in our days.

Wishing you a wonderful week, Shoshana

Yitzy Halpern, PUBLISHER

publisher@fivetownsjewishhome.com

Yosef Feinerman, MANAGING EDITOR ads@fivetownsjewishhome.com

Shoshana Soroka, EDITOR

editor@fivetownsjewishhome.com

Nate Davis Editorial Assistant Nechama Wein Copy Editor Rachel Bergida Shana Brecher Lani White Design & Production Gabe Solomon Distribution & Logistics P.O. BOX 266 Lawrence, NY 11559 Phone | 516-734-0858 Fax | 516-734-0857 Classified Deadline: Monday 5:00PM classifieds@fivetownsjewishhome.com text 443-929-4003 PAYMENT VIA CREDIT CARD MUST BE SUBMITTED ALONG WITH CLASSIFIED ADS The Jewish Home is an independent weekly magazine.

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Weekly Weather | December 26 – January 1

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Candle Lighting: 4:16 pm Shabbos Ends: 5:21 pm Rabbeinu Tam: 5:47 pm

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Contents LETTERS TO THE EDITOR

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COMMUNITY Readers’ Poll

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Community Happenings

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Voice Notes: To Tell the Truth, Snowflakes Are Falling

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NEWS

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Global

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National

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That’s Odd

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ISRAEL Israel News

The Traveling Siddur by Barbara Deutsch

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JEWISH THOUGHT Torah Sparks

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Rabbi Wein on the Parsha

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Protect the Candle by Rav Moshe Weinberger

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Your Creation Story by Rabbi Shmuel Reichman

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Delving into the Daf by Rabbi Avrohom Sebrow

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Headlines and Halacha by Rabbi Yair Hoffman

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PEOPLE Mitchell Silk: A Chassid in the Cabinet

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Inspiration Nation

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Military Year in Review by Avi Heiligman

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HEALTH & FITNESS The Dangerous Power of Assumptions by Michal Goldman, LCSW

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The Side Effects We Never Name in Psychiatry

by Rivka Kramer, PMHNP-BC

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Weight Loss Surgery and Nutrition by Aliza Beer, RD

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The Fast and the Female by Sara Weissman

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FOOD & LEISURE Food for Thought

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The Aussie Gourmet: Smores Mug Cake

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LIFESTYLES

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Dating Dialogue, Moderated

by Jennifer Mann, LCSW

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School of Thought

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Parenting Pearls

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Dear Editor, Every few months, we see articles from teachers and others stressing the need for hakaras hatov from parents and students.

I cannot agree more. Hakaras hatov is so important. As a nation, our foundation is built on hakaras hatov. Parents should make sure to reach out to teachers and let them know how much they appreciate all the hard work that they put in.

One thing is a bit off-putting, though.

Some of these articles are written by teachers. And they are written by teachers with a lot of criticism and disapproval: we’re not appreciated enough, we work so hard, we put in so many hours after we leave school, we think of your kids ALL THE TIME. These articles come across as very demanding. They make these teachers sound very dissatisfied with their profession. They make it seem as if they’re begrudgingly holding up the whole world by being in the classroom.

I am sure it’s just a select few who have this view. And I’m sure that there are so many teachers out there who spend their days in the classroom joyfully, connecting to students, loving their students, appreciating that they are involved in klei kodesh and chinuch every day.

But for those teachers who feel burdened by the profession, I ask you: would you want your child to be in your classroom? If chinuch is not for you and you can barely manage the weight and you’re only doing it because you want to be on the same schedule as your children or it’s convenient or you need a tuition break, why are you there? You’re doing us a disservice. You’re doing our children a disservice. And you’re doing yourself a disservice by staying in the classroom.

In a recent interview I saw with an educator, he said that the most important thing about choosing the right teacher is discerning that he or she loves children

and wants to connect with them. The rest (curriculum, classroom management, etc.) can be taught. But a love of children and a desire to reach them and teach them is key.

If you are a teacher who feels burns out and unappreciated, perhaps it’s time to take a step back.

If you are a teacher who is energized by your days in the classroom – we applaud you and laud you! Thank you for being there for our children each day! Thank you for uplifting their lives! Thank you for keeping Yiddishkeit vibrant and radiant!

Thank you for all you do! May Hashem continue to bring you strength and insight to connect with all your students!

A Reader Dear Editor, I appreciate Sara Rayvych’s weekly articles in TJH. Her article on “Gelt Gains” was a wonderful read. I cannot emphasize enough how important it is for parents to speak with kids about finances. Tell them about what credits cards are and what a mortgage is. Explain to them about paying bills timely at the end of the month.

Show them how you compare prices when you’re shopping. (This bag of flour is $2.99; this larger bag is $3.99 – which is a better price?)

Some schools offer classes to students to help them with budgeting and other financial terms. As a community, we owe it to our children to teach them! Our young couples get married without any financial literacy. They barely know what an interest rate is. How can we let them start a new life together without these vital skills?

I urge schools that don’t yet offer these programs to give at least a series of classes to their eleventh and twelfth gradContinued on page 12

The Woe of a Weekly Article

by Rivki D. Rosenwald Esq., CLC, SDS 126 HUMOR Centerfold

Shmooze and Muse

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POLITICAL CROSSFIRE Notable Quotes

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The Outlines of a Sustainable Ukraine Peace Deal by David Ignatius

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The Conservative Big Tent Won’t Exclude Antisemites by Jonathan S. Tobin 118 Worried About the AI Spending Boom? by George Will

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CLASSIFIEDS

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Would you quit your job if you won the lottery?

69 31 %

No

Yes

%

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Continued from page 10

ers. They will be a lifeline for the next generation.

Avital Klein Dear Editor, Your dating column is by far the best column you have. I always turn to it first.

The question is always interesting and the answers (I won’t say whose I read first!) are generally insightful.

But sometimes I wonder if these questions are made up. I, mean, please, a 26-year-old girl who is dating a guy and is worried that they don’t have the same hobbies?

You are different people. You are different genders. You have different minds and likes and dislikes and interests. The key to marriage is understanding that you are different people who connect and will build a life together. Did you ask every other person you dated if they liked shopping and drinking coffee on Sunday morning?

I really hope this young lady has figured out how to appreciate that her date likes to play golf while she sips her latte on Sunday morning. If not, she has a lot to learn about relationships.

Yocheved Rosegarten

Dear Editor, There is a pandemic plaguing today’s generation: depression and a lack of purpose. These two phenomena are interlinked, for if you don’t know your purpose, your self-esteem takes a blow.

There is really no way to leave a state of depression unless one has the courage and boldness to dedicate their energies to developing and honing their talents.

There is a famous speaker, Rabbi Pinto, who has fans such as LeBron James and Kanye West. He is a true lover of people, with an overpowering love for all Jews. He addresses this exact point, focusing on the need for people to develop their talents and contribute through their individual skills. Otherwise, he sees people wandering without purpose.

Parshas Vayigash and Vayechei speak to these themes. Yehudah becomes the roaring lion, putting everything on the line to bring Binyamin back, and Yosef fills the role of the empathetic yet fiery baal bitachon—one with complete belief in G-d. Eventually, all the tribes receive individual blessings from Yaakov that define their purpose. This gives them the self-confidence to make their mark on the world and weaves personal purpose into the tapestry of society.

Steven Genack

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The Week In News

Danish Postal Service Ends

After delivering mail for more than 400 years, the Danish postal service will close its doors on December 30.

Announcing the decision earlier this year to stop delivering letters, PostNord, formed in 2009 in a merger of the Swedish and Danish postal services, said it would cut 1,500 jobs in Denmark and remove 1,500 red postboxes amid the “increasing digitalization” of Danish society.

Describing Denmark as “one of the

most digitalized countries in the world,” the company noted that the demand for letters had “fallen drastically” while online shopping continued to increase, prompting the decision to instead focus on parcels.

One thousand of the postboxes were bought on sale this month in just a mere three hours for around $300 each. Two hundred others will be auctioned off in January.

PostNord, which will continue to deliver letters in Sweden, has said it will refund unused Danish stamps for a limited time.

So how do you send your grandchild’s birthday card to him in Denmark? Danes will still be able to send letters using the delivery company Dao, which already delivers letters in Denmark but will expand its services from January 1 from about 30 million letters in 2025 to 8 million next year. Customers will have to go to a Dao shop to post their letters – or pay extra to have it collected from home – and pay for postage either online or via an app.

The Danish postal service began delivering mail in the country in 1624. Letter-sending saw a sharp decline over the past 25 years, falling more than 90%.

According to Danish law, the option to send a letter must exist. This means that if Dao were to stop delivering letters, the

government would be obliged to appoint another company to carry out the task.

Sinkhole Traps Boats

This week, a massive sinkhole developed in a canal in the English county of Shropshire. Two boats subsequently became trapped in deep mud. Another boat leaned over the sinkhole’s slope. The sinkhole measured around 164 square feet.

Canal boats are long vessels designed to navigate Britain’s system of narrow canals. Historically, the boats were used to transport cargo but have since evolved into floating homes and are also used for recreational purposes.

Rescue teams responded to a “significant breach” of the Shropshire Union Canal in Whitchurch, a historic market town near the Welsh border, Shropshire

Fire and Rescue Service said on Monday.

A “major incident” was declared at 5:17 a.m., but the situation was later declared “stable,” said Scott Hurford, Area Manager at the service.

Rescue crews had been working in challenging conditions due to unstable ground and “rapidly moving water” but managed to bring more than 10 members of the public to safety.

The Canal and River Trust, the largest canal charity in the United Kingdom, said, “Our teams are on site and have dammed off the affected section of (the) canal. The priority is the safety of boaters and those in the immediate area.”

Stealing from the French Palace

Three men will be on trial next year after a silver steward employed at the official

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to ban “Globalize the intifada” chants, amid a crackdown on “hateful” rhetoric and slogans in the wake of Sunday’s devastating terror attack at a Bondi Beach Chanukah celebration.

New South Wales is home to Sydney and its iconic Bondi Beach, where 15 people were slaughtered and dozens others were wounded by two Muslim gunmen who opened fire on a crowd celebrating the Jewish holiday.

residence of the French president was arrested this week in the theft of items of silverware and table service worth thousands of euros, the Paris prosecutor’s office said.

It is estimated that the loss amounts to around 15,000 to 40,000 euros.

The Élysée Palace’s head steward reported the disappearance. The Sèvres Manufactory — which supplied most of the furnishings — identified several of the missing items on online auction websites.

Questioning of Élysée staff led investigators

to suspect one of the silver stewards, whose inventory records gave the impression he was planning future thefts, authorities said.

Around 100 objects were found in the silver steward’s personal locker, his vehicle and his home. Among the items recovered were copper saucepans, Sèvres porcelain, a René Lalique statuette and Baccarat champagne coupes.

The steward and his partner were arrested on Tuesday. Investigators also identified a single receiver of the sto-

len goods. The recovered items were returned to the Élysée Palace. The trial will take place in February.

Aus. State to Ban “Globalize the Intifada” According to a BBC report, the Australian state of New South Wales is planning

The elder gunman, 50-year-old Sajid Akram, was shot and killed by police.

His 24-year-old son, Naveed, survived and remains in the hospital under police guard, facing charges including terrorism and 15 murders.

The mass shooting was Australia’s worst in nearly 30 years and is being investigated as an act of terrorism targeting Jews. Authorities have ramped up patrols and policing across the country to prevent further antisemitic violence.

Since the attack, New South Wales Premier Chris Minns has said he plans to convene the state’s parliament and pass stricter hate speech and incitement laws.

According to the BBC, Minns is looking to classify the “Globalize the intifada” chant, popular among anti-Israel and antisemitic activists, as illegal hate speech, and aims to encourage a “summer of calm,” without mass anti-Israel demonstrations.

Many in Australia’s Jewish community say the government, and Prime Minister Anthony Albanese in particular, “abandoned“ them amid mass demonstrations against Israel and Jews, arguing that clear warning signs were ignored in the lead-up to the Bondi massacre.

Since Hamas attacked Israel on October 7, sparking the Gaza war and setting off a tidal wave of antisemitism across the globe, Australia’s 120,000-strong Jewish community has been among the hardest hit, with successive marches and protests, synagogues, schools and homes firebombed, two nurses threatening to kill Jewish patients at their hospital, and the discovery of a trailer filled with explosives said to have been intended to cause a mass-casualty event at a Sydney synagogue.

“We can’t be in a position where we

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see a repeat of Sunday. We need to do everything within our power to make that change,” Minns told reporters.

Russian General Killed by Car Bomb

Lt. Gen. Fanil Sarvarov was killed when a bomb stuck to the side of his vehicle exploded early Monday. Sarvarov headed Russia’s General Staff’s army operational training directorate. He had just begun heading to work at 7 a.m. when the bomb went off.

Sarvarov, 56, was a highly decorated officer who graduated from a tank command school in the waning years of the Soviet Union and served in the conflicts fueled by its collapse. He fought in Chechnya and in a brief war in North Ossetia in the 1990s and later took part in Russia’s military intervention in Syria.

Kremlin spokesman Dmitry Peskov described the incident as “a terrifying murder” and said Russia’s security services were working to identify the perpetrators.

Sarvarov’s killing is the latest in a series of apparent assassinations of members of Russia’s military command since the start of Russia’s war in Ukraine.

In December of last year, Ukraine’s SBU security service claimed responsibility for an attack that killed Lt. Gen. Igor Kirillov, the commander of a Russian unit designed to protect troops from chemical, radiological and biological attack. Kirillov was killed when a scooter blew up beside him on the snowy streets of Moscow.

Ukraine is also suspected of being behind the assassinations of a top Russian missile scientist, a pro-Moscow former Ukrainian lawmaker and a prominent nationalist war blogger. In 2022, U.S. intelligence agencies concluded that Kyiv was responsible for the killing of Daria Dugina, the daughter of a prominent far-right Russian ideologue.

Shooting at S. African Tavern At least nine people were killed early Sunday when a mob of assailants opened

fire with pistols and an assault rifle at a South African tavern.

At least 12 people were involved in the attack that took place around 1 a.m. at KWA Noxolo tavern in Bekkersdal township, which is west of Johannesburg.

They exited from two vehicles – a white van and a silver sedan – then stormed into the bar and opened fire on patrons inside.

Three people were fatally shot inside the tavern, Fred Kekana, the police commissioner of the Gauteng province, said. The group then continued shooting outside the tavern, where six other people were killed. At least ten others were injured.

After the killings, the perpetrators searched through the bodies of the dead and injured to steal valuables, including cellphones.

The tavern operated as an a shebeen, a type of informal licensed bar that is popular in townships.

Australian Gun Buyback

Australian Prime Minister Anthony Albanese announced on Friday an upcoming major gun buyback program, framing the program as a response to the Bondi Beach shooting, which killed at least 15 people at a Chanukah celebration.

The buyback, which will allow gun owners to surrender their excess firearms, will require states and territories to collect and the federal government to destroy hundreds of thousands of weapons. The initiative, which is expected to coincide with other gun control laws, will cost the federal and state governments a significant amount of money.

In the national cabinet, state governments are working to tighten gun laws

to close loopholes, making gun licenses exclusive to Australian citizens, requiring better background checks, creating a national firearms register by 2027 or later, and more.

The state of New South Wales said it would set its gun limit of four for most recreational shooters, while primary producers and sports shooters would be allowed 10 at most. The state parliament is scheduled to debate the reforms next week, including a system that permits gun owners to appeal police decisions to suspend or revoke their firearms license.

Albanese declared on Sunday a national day of reflection for the 15 victims of the terror attack and confirmed that the shooters used a regular online video game feed from the Islamic State terrorist organization while implementing their terror.

NSW Premier Chris Minns has also set his sights on completely banning weapons that use belt-fed magazines and reclassifying fast-shooting weapons to a more restrictive license category.

Critics have criticized the move as politically motivated and ineffective.

“From what we are learning, the focus should be on information sharing, risk identification and enforcement of existing powers, not on arbitrary limits that penalize people who have done nothing wrong,” Dan Repacholi, an Olympic shooter and Labor backbencher, posted on social media. “NSW police already have significant powers to suspend or cancel licenses where someone is not fit and proper.”

Opposition leader Sussan Ley, on Friday, suggested that new gun proposals are necessary but noted that they shouldn’t detract from the issue of combating antisemitism.

“It is … disingenuous and not right to deflect the conversation to that because what we have to deal with here is a rising tide of festering antisemitism,” she said.

Graham Park, the Shooters Union Australia president, called the move a “pure political stunt” and claimed that Albanese’s inaction led to the Bondi Beach shooting.

Fifteen people were killed in the terror attack on Bondi Beach last week. Another 42 were wounded.

Mass shootings are rare in Australia, which has historically strict gun laws dating back to 1996, when a gunman killed 35 people in an attack in Tasmania. The April 28 mass shooting came to be known as the Port Arthur massacre, and almost immediately the bloodshed prompted Australia’s political leaders to unite behind an effort to tighten the country’s gun laws.

Japan to Reopen Biggest Nuclear Plant

On Monday, a regional vote determined that Japan should reopen Kashiwazaki-Kariwa, the biggest nuclear plant in the world, which was shuttered along with 53 other reactors following a 2011 earthquake and tsunami that hit the Fukushima Daiichi plant, causing the Fukushima disaster, which was the worst of its kind since Chernobyl.

Japan has since reopened 14 of the 33 operable plants in an effort to reduce its dependence on imported fossil fuels.

Kashiwazaki-Kariwa will be controlled

by Tokyo Electric Power Co (TEPCO), the company that managed the Fukushima plant. Public broadcaster NHK reported that TEPCO is considering reactivating the first of seven plants on January 20.

The Niigata prefecture’s assembly, on Monday, passed a vote of confidence on Niigata Governor Hideyo Hanazumi, who supported the plant’s reopening.

Many oppose the government’s decision to restart the nuclear plant. A survey showed that around 70% of residents were uneasy about TEPCO taking control of the plant, while 60% thought it was too early to reopen it.

Prime Minister Sanae Takaichi, who was sworn in around two months ago, has supported nuclear restarts. Last year, Japan imported $68 billion worth of imported liquefied natural gas and coal, which is a tenth of its total import costs. Those imported fossil fuels are responsible for 60% to 70% of Japanese electricity generation.

Japan has also remained committed to lowering its carbon footprint.

Germany’s Missile System with Israel Germany is poised to finalize a $3.5 billion expansion of its Arrow 3 long-range

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Arrow 3 is designed to intercept and destroy ballistic missiles while they are still outside the Earth’s atmosphere. Together with the earlier Arrow 2 system, it has successfully intercepted hundreds of ballistic missiles launched at Israel by Iran and the Iran-backed Houthi terrorist group in Yemen, achieving an interception rate of 86 percent during the 12-day conflict with Iran in June.

The sale is a key component of the German-led European Sky Shield Initiative, which aims to strengthen Europe’s air and missile defenses in response to Russia’s invasion of Ukraine.

Both Israel and Germany have described the agreement as a reflection of their deepening defense partnership, which has also included joint military exercises and Germany’s purchase of Israel’s TROPHY active protection system for its Leopard 2 tanks.

Lebanon: Close to Shutting Hezbollah

missile defense agreement with Israel after the Bundestag approved the contract on Wednesday.

Earlier this month, Israel delivered the first Arrow 3 battery to Germany under an initial deal worth roughly $4.7 billion that was signed two years ago.

The newly approved expansion is part of a broader $60 billion defense spending package covering more than 30 procurement contracts, driven largely by heightened security concerns stemming from

Russia’s aggression.

According to procurement documents cited by Bloomberg, the $3.5 billion expansion includes additional interceptor missiles for the Arrow 3 system. Israel’s Defense Ministry said the deal would “significantly increase the production rate of Arrow 3 interceptors and launchers to be supplied to Germany, substantially enhancing its air and missile defense capabilities.”

With the expansion, the total value of the Arrow agreements between Israel and

Germany will reach approximately $8 billion, making it the largest defense export deal in Israel’s history.

The delivery of the first Arrow 3 battery in early December marked a milestone for the Israeli-developed system, representing its first deployment outside Israel and the United States and the first time it has been independently operated by another country. The system has been stationed at Holzdorf Air Base in eastern Germany.

According to Lebanese Prime Minister Nawaf Salam, Lebanon is close to completing the disarmament of Hezbollah south of the Litani River, as the country races to fulfill a key demand of its ceasefire with Israel before a year-end deadline.

The U.S.-backed ceasefire was agreed to in November 2024. It ended more than a year of fighting between Israel and Hezbollah and required the disarmament of the Iran-aligned terror group, starting in areas south of the river adjacent to Israel.

Lebanese authorities, led by Salam and President Joseph Aoun, tasked the U.S.-backed Lebanese army on August 5 with devising a plan to establish a state monopoly on arms by the end of the year.

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“Prime Minister Salam affirmed that the first phase of the weapons consolidation plan related to the area south of the Litani River is only days away from completion,” a statement from his office said. “The state is ready to move on to the second phase — namely [confiscating weapons] north of the Litani River — based on the plan prepared by the Lebanese army pursuant to a mandate from the government.”

The statement came after Salam held talks with Simon Karam, Lebanon’s top civilian negotiator on a committee overseeing the Hezbollah-Israel truce.

Israel has brought up concerns about the effectiveness of the Lebanese military.

Hezbollah itself has repeatedly rejected calls to surrender its arms.

Amid those concerns, the head of Lebanon’s army agreed earlier this week to document progress in disarming Hezbollah during talks Thursday with international envoys in Paris, the French foreign ministry said, as Beirut seeks to avert expanded Israeli strikes.

Hezbollah, a Shiite Muslim terror group, has tried to resist the pressure — from its mainly Christian and Sunni Muslim opponents in Lebanon as well as from the U.S. and Saudi Arabia — to disarm.

The U.S.-brokered ceasefire with Hez-

bollah came after two months of open conflict in Lebanon late last year, including an IDF ground operation in the country’s south, in a bid to enable the safe return of some 60,000 residents of northern Israel who had been displaced by the terror group’s near-daily attacks. The rocket attacks began on October 8, 2023, a day after fellow Iran-backed terror group Hamas invaded southern Israel and slaughtered 1,200 innocent people in Israel.

The ceasefire required both Israel and Hezbollah to vacate southern Lebanon, to be replaced by the Lebanese armed forces. Israel has withdrawn from all but five strategic posts along the border.

Since the ceasefire, the IDF said it has killed over 380 Hezbollah operatives and members of allied terror groups in strikes, hit hundreds of Hezbollah sites, and conducted over 1,200 raids and other small operations in southern Lebanon.

443 Die in Car Accidents in 2025 Thus far, fatal traffic-related incidents have killed 443 people in Israel this year, exceeding last year’s death toll of 438, according to the National Road

Safety Authority. It’s Israel’s highest fatal traffic-related incident death toll since 2005, when 460 people were killed on the road. In 2023, 361 people died, while 351 deaths took place in 2022.

Just last week, six people were killed on the road. Last Wednesday, a pedestrian in her 60s was killed after getting hit by a bus. On Monday, a young man from Beit Shemesh died after stopping his car on the side of the highway to deal with a tire puncture.

On Sunday, four people died, including a three-year-old Bedouin girl, who was struck by a car; a Hatzalah paramedic, Chemi Erlanger, who was riding a motorcycle; an 18-year-old girl from Tiberias named Gefen Cohen; and Raja Zoabi, a former soccer player who died near Afula in a motorcycle accident.

This year, 118 pedestrians were killed, 142 were drivers operating a private vehicle, 95 were riding motorcycles or motor scooters, 15 rode electric scooters or e-bikes, 13 were in trucks, 13 on tractors, nine on bikes, and eight on buses. It is unclear how the other 30 died.

The NRSA’s plan to deal with road accidents has been severely delayed, and the agency has drastically lost funding.

Army Radio to Shut Down

In a unanimous vote, the cabinet approved Defense Minister Israel Katz’s decision to shutter Army Radio, a station that has been run by the IDF since 1950.

Unless the move is stopped, the station will be forced to shut down on March 1, 2026, Katz’s office stated.

At the meeting, Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu noted how odd it is for a democratic nation to have an army-run

broadcaster, adding that “a military station broadcasting under the authority of the army…exists in North Korea and maybe a few other countries, and we certainly do not want to be counted among them.”

He added that he believes in competition.

Katz framed the decision as a correction to a democratic “anomaly.”

“A situation in which a radio station intended for all citizens of the State of Israel is operated by the military is an anomaly that does not exist in democratic countries,” Katz told the cabinet, asserting that the station’s content, including its politics and news segment, “creates a fundamental difficulty for the IDF, stemming from the IDF’s involuntary involvement in political discourse,” and “harms the Israel Defense Forces, its soldiers and its unity.”

Katz added that “after October 7, these difficulties became even more acute.”

After the vote, Katz ordered station operations to start winding down, to stop hiring, and to begin transferring soldiers employed by the station to other units.

Army Radio’s closure should be finalized

by February 15, according to Katz.

Attorney General Gali Baharav-Miara challenged the move’s legality, claiming that the cabinet does not have the authority to shut down Army Radio. Opposition leaders, including Yair Lapid, also criticized the decision, charging that the move was “part of the government’s move to abolish freedom of expression in Israel in an election year.”

3 Hezbollah Terrorists Killed

This week, the IDF said that a drone strike targeting a car near Sidon, Lebanon, killed three Hezbollah terrorists.

One of the three terrorists, Ali Abdullah, served in the Lebanese army’s intelligence unit.

Israel and Lebanon signed a ceasefire agreement in November. As part of that agreement, Lebanon is supposed to be disarming Hezbollah. Israel has questioned the Lebanese military’s effectiveness and has accused Hezbollah of rearming, while the group itself has rejected calls to surrender its weapons.

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“The IDF emphasizes that it is acting against terrorists from the Hezbollah terror organization, who are working to restore terror infrastructure, in serious violation of the understandings between Israel and Lebanon,” the army said.

One of the other two operatives was involved in Hezbollah’s air defenses in Sidon.

The Lebanese state-run National News Agency said the strike was carried out by an Israeli drone around 10 kilometers (six miles) from Sidon.

Israel has continued to strike Lebanon, targeting Hezbollah infrastructure or operatives as it seems fit. It has also kept troops in five south Lebanon locations that it deems strategic.

Under the international pressure, and in light of fears of expanded Israeli strikes, Lebanon has committed to disarming Hezbollah and plans to do so south of the Litani River, about 30 kilometers from the border with Israel, by year’s end.

The latest strikes came after Lebanese and Israeli civilian representatives on Friday took part in a meeting of the ceasefire monitoring committee for a second time, having held their first direct talks in decades earlier this month, also under the committee’s auspices.

The committee comprises representatives from Lebanon, Israel, the United States, France, and the United Nations Interim Force in Lebanon (UNIFIL).

On Saturday, Prime Minister Nawaf Salam said the first phase of the plan to restrict weapons to the state south of the Litani River was “days away from completion,” according to a statement from his office.

“The state is ready to move to the second phase, north of the Litani River, based on the plan prepared by the Lebanese army,” he added.

The U.S.-brokered ceasefire with Hezbollah came after two months of open conflict in Lebanon, including an IDF ground operation in the country’s south, in a bid to enable the safe return of some 60,000 residents of northern Israel displaced by the terror group’s near-daily attacks. The rocket attacks began on October 8, 2023, a day after terrorists entered Israel and slaughtered 1,200 innocent people in Israel.

Brown U. Suspect is Dead

tional news agency Lusa that “the investigation is far from over.”

In the wake of the killings, the Trump administration ordered the suspension of the green card lottery program that Neves Valente had used to enter the U.S. in 2000. “This heinous individual should never have been allowed in our country,” the U.S. homeland security secretary, Kristi Noem, said on X.

Blackout in San Fran

Claudio Manuel Neves Valente was the perpetrator responsible for the mass shooting at Brown University last week and the killing of a MIT professor in Massachusetts. The 48-year-old Portuguese national had been living in the United States and killed himself on December 16. He was found dead in a storage locker two days later.

On December 13, Neves Valente behind the shooting in Rhode Island that claimed the lives of two students, Ella Cook and Mukhammad Aziz Umurzokov, and injured nine others in Brown university’s Barus & Holley engineering building. On December 16, MIT nuclear physics professor Nuno Loureiro died at a hospital in Massachusetts after Neves Valente shot him.

A homeless former Brown student name “John” helped authorities identify Neves Valente as a person of interest.

“That person led us to the car, which led us to the name, which led us to the photographs, which matched the clothing,” said Rhode Island’s attorney general, Peter Neronha. “He was found dead with a satchel with two firearms and evidence in the car that matches exactly what we see at the scene here in Providence.”

Neves Valente had been a doctoral student at Brown and previously studied with Loureiro and attended the same academic program between 1995 and 2000 at Instituto Superior Técnico, Portugal’s premier engineering university.

A motive for the killings has not been formally established by authorities.

Portugal’s foreign minister, Paulo Rangel, said on Friday that his government was taken aback by revelations that a Portuguese man was the suspect in the mass shooting at Brown and the killing of Loureiro, according to the Associated Press. He said Portugal has provided “very broad cooperation” and told the na-

On Saturday, a widespread blackout plunged nearly a third of San Francisco into darkness, disrupting daily life and public transportation and forcing Waymo to suspend its autonomous taxi service as the autonomous cars stalled at intersections across the city, creating havoc on the city streets.

The blackout impacted about 130,000 Pacific Gas & Electric (PG&E) customers. It began early Saturday morning and lasted into the evening. It struck during one of the busiest weekends before the holidays, forcing shops and restaurants to close.

The outage also disrupted public transit, including the Bay Area Rapid Transit (BART) system and San Francisco’s Muni network, leaving many residents stranded and unable to get home.

A Waymo spokesperson said that it had “temporarily” suspended its autonomous taxi service after vehicles were stalling at intersections as traffic signals were out, causing traffic jams and blocking emergency vehicles.

Fire officials confirmed that parts of the outage were caused by a fire at a PG&E substation near 8th and Mission Streets, which was stabilized at around 4 p.m.

Pearl Harbor Vet Dies at 105 World War II Navy veteran Ira “Ike” Schab, one of the survivors of the 1941 Japanese bombing of Pearl Harbor, died over the weekend at the age of 105.

With his passing, there remains only

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about a dozen survivors of the surprise attack, which killed just over 2,400 troops and propelled the United States into the war.

Jail for Bosnian Prison Guard

Kemal Mrndzic is a naturalized U.S. citizen who has been living in Massachusetts. But the 52-year-old has a secret life that he failed to mention when applying to come to the United States. Last week, he was sentenced to five years in prison for falsely claiming to be a Bosnian War refugee, when in fact he persecuted ethnic Serbs at a notorious prison camp.

A federal jury convicted him in October of scheming to conceal his involvement three decades ago in the persecution of Serb prisoners at the Celebici prison camp in Bosnia. Mrndzic also made false statements to federal agents about his role at the camp, possessed a fraudulently obtained naturalization certificate and Social Security Card, and used a fraudulently obtained passport, the jury found.

U.S. Attorney Leah B. Foley said it was all part of a plot to evade accountability for his participation in the torture of “countless victims” at the camp.

“By holding him accountable for his lies and fraudulent conduct, this sentence reinforces our resolve to ensure that those responsible for war crimes and human rights abuses are identified, exposed and prosecuted,” Foley said. “This case underscores that we will not allow our nation to be a refuge for those who seek to escape justice.”

Mrndzic was sentenced to a total of 65 months in prison followed by three years of supervised release. The government will be working to revoke his fraudulently obtained citizenship.

Mrndzic served as a supervisor of the guards at Celebici during the war in the 1990s, federal prosecutors said. Twentyone former detainees described him as

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Schab was a sailor of just 21 years old at the time of the attack, and for decades, he rarely spoke about the experience.

But in recent years, aware that the group of survivors was dwindling, the centenarian made a point of traveling from his home in Beaverton, Oregon, to the annual observance at the Hawaii military base.

“To pay honor to the guys that didn’t make it,” Schab said in 2023.

He was not well enough to attend this year’s ceremony.

Born on Independence Day in 1920 in Chicago, Schab was the eldest of three brothers. He joined the Navy at 18, following in the footsteps of his father.

On what began as a peaceful Sunday, December 7, 1941, Schab, who played the tuba in the USS Dobbin’s band, was expecting a visit from his brother, a fellow service member assigned to a nearby naval radio station. Schab had just showered and donned a clean uniform when he heard a call for fire rescue.

He went topside and saw another ship, the USS Utah, capsizing. Japanese planes roared through the air.

“We were pretty startled. Startled and scared to death,” Schab recalled in 2023.

“We didn’t know what to expect, and we knew that if anything happened to us, that would be it.”

He scurried back below deck to grab boxes of ammunition and joined a daisy chain of sailors feeding shells to an antiaircraft gun above.

His ship lost three sailors, according to Navy records. One was killed in action, and two died later of fragment wounds from a bomb that struck the stern. All had been manning an antiaircraft gun.

Schab spent most of the war with the Navy in the Pacific, going to the New Hebrides, now known as Vanuatu, and then the Mariana Islands and Okinawa, Japan.

After the war he studied aerospace engineering and worked on the Apollo spaceflight program as an electrical engineer for General Dynamics, helping send astronauts to the moon.

Schab’s son also joined the Navy and

is a retired commander.

Speaking at a 2022 ceremony, Schab asked people to honor those who served at Pearl Harbor. “Remember what they’re here for. Remember and honor those that are left. They did a [heck] of a job,” he said. “Those who are still here, dead or alive.”

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one of the “most notable guards at the camp, who was widely known for his particularly vicious treatment of prisoners,” prosecutors said.

Prosecutors said Mrndzic schemed to leave Bosnia by crossing the border into Croatia and applying as a refugee to the U.S. with a false story. He lied on a refugee application that he fled his home after being captured and abused by Serb forces and could not safely return home, prosecutors said.

He became a naturalized U.S. citizen in 2009.

Blakeman for NY Governor

On Friday, Republican Rep. Elise Stefanik dropped out of the New York governor’s race, clearing the way for Nassau

County Executive Bruce Blakeman to clinch the GOP nomination.

“While we would have overwhelmingly won this primary, it is not an effective use of our time or your generous resources to spend the first half of next year in an unnecessary and protracted Republican primary, especially in a challenging state like New York,” Stefanik said in a statement.

She added that she is not considering running for re-election for Congress. Stefanik, considered a rising MAGA leader, was initially set to leave Congress after President Trump picked her in November 2024 for U.S. ambassador to the United Nations. Her nomination was eventually pulled by the administration in March over concerns about a narrowing Republican majority in the House.

Trump said that Stefanik was a “fantastic person and Congresswoman from New York State” and described her as “a tremendous talent.” He said she would have “great success” in whatever she chooses next and signaled his continued support.

Under New York GOP rules, candidates must secure at least 25% of the weighted vote at the state party’s February convention to qualify for the June primary ballot, or otherwise submit nom-

inating petitions.

While Stefanik was believed to have early support representing well above that threshold — possibly more than 75% of the weighted vote due to early endorsements from local party officials — Blakeman’s entry into the race would have risked a prolonged intraparty fight.

Whoever wins the GOP primary will race off against incumbent Democratic Gov. Kathy Hochul. New York hasn’t elected a Republican governor since 2002, though Hochul won her 2022 race by a single-digit margin of 6.4 percentage points.

When asked about the race earlier last week, Trump told reporters at the White House, “First of all, he’s a friend. She’s a friend,” he said, referring to Blakeman and Stefanik. “These are two great people running. In a way, I hate to see them running against each other. I hope they’re not going to be damaging each other.”

He added, “Elise is fantastic, and Bruce is. They’re two fantastic people, and I always hate it when two very good friends of mine are running.”

Stefanik, a member of House Republican leadership and one of Trump’s closest allies in Congress, had been viewed by New York Republicans as a formidable contender given her national profile and fundraising strength — over $12 million raised.

Park Ranger Dies at 104

She was 104 years old and brought inspiration to so many. Betty Reid Soskin, who served as the nation’s oldest park ranger, died on Sunday at her home in Richmond, California.

“She led a fully packed life and was ready to leave,” her family said in a statement on social media.

Soskin, who joined the National Park Service at 85 and retired when she turned 100, used her role as the nation’s oldest park ranger to share the untold stories of Black women, including herself, who served on the homefront during World War II. During the war, Soskin worked as a file clerk at Boilermakers Local Auxiliary

36, a segregated union for Black workers, at the sprawling Kaiser Shipyards, where thousands of women helped construct some 700 Liberty and Victory ships.

Ms. Soskin was born Betty Charbonnet in Detroit on Sept. 22, 1921, and grew up in a Cajun-Creole, African American family in New Orleans. In 1927, after a devastating flood hit the city, her family relocated to Oakland, California.

In 1945, Soskin and her husband at the time, Mel Reid, opened one of the country’s first Black-owned music stores, Reid’s Records, which operated until 2019. She became involved in politics at one point. When working as a field representative for a California assemblyman, she met with Park Service planners to discuss the development of an urban park paying tribute to World War II homefront workers. In 2003, she left her state job to become a consultant to the Rosie the Riveter WWII Home Front National Historical Park and four years later, at the age of 85, became a park ranger.

In a statement , the park paid tribute to Soskin’s time as a ranger: “She was a powerful voice for sharing her personal experiences, highlighting untold stories, and honoring the contributions of women from diverse backgrounds who worked on the World War II Home Front.”

Special Envoy to Greenland

President Donald Trump recently appointed Louisiana Governor Jeff Landry as the U.S.’s special envoy to Greenland.

The appointment ruffled some feathers, leading to Foreign Minister of Denmark Lars Lokke Rasmussen to summon the U.S. ambassador.

Rasmussen said in a statement that Landry’s appointment showed that the White House’s interest in the Greenland, which is rich in natural resources and strategically located, had not gone away.

Denmark, a NATO ally of the United States, has repeatedly said Greenland is not for sale.

Greenland is controlled by Denmark, though the territory has its own local government. Greenland prime minister Jens-Frederik Nielsen, in a separate

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statement, said the island would decide its own future.

“We insist that everyone, including the U.S., must show respect for the territorial integrity of the Kingdom of Denmark,” Rasmussen said.

A day earlier, Trump wrote in a post on his social media website Truth Social that “Jeff understands how essential Greenland is to our National Security and will strongly advance our Country’s Interests for the Safety, Security, and Survival of our Allies, and indeed, the World.”

The U.S. and Denmark have been at tense ties because of the U.S.’s alleged interest in Greenland. Earlier in December, Denmark’s intelligence services for the first time described the United States as a potential threat to its national security because of the Trump administration’s apparent willingness to use economic and military coercion and pressure “to enforce its will,” even against allies.

Landry has been Louisiana’s governor since January 2024. His term ends in 2028.

“It’s an honor to serve you in this volunteer position to make Greenland part of the U.S.,” Landry wrote in a post on X in which he thanked Trump for the role.

“This in no way affects my position as Governor of Louisiana!” he added.

Landry is a former police officer and was Louisiana’s attorney general before being elected governor.

Greenland is around three times the size of Texas, with a population of about 57,000 people.

Greenland’s economy relies heavily on fishing and subsidies from Denmark.

Greenland sits along the shortest route between Europe and North America, a key location for a U.S. ballistic missile defense system.

MAGA Rift

At the first Turning Point USA event since founder Charlie Kirk was assassinated, Republican figures criticized each other during their speeches, highlighting a growing rift in the Make America Great Again movement.

During his speech, Ben Shapiro condemned Tucker Carlson, a former Fox News host and prominent political commentator, for uncritically interviewing Nick Fuentes, a racist and self-described white nationalist. Shapiro called Carlson’s decision to interview Fuentes, “a Hitler apologist, Nazi-loving, anti-American piece of refuse,” an “act of moral imbecility,” adding that Kirk “despised” Fuentes.

“He knew that Nick Fuentes is an evil troll and that building him up is an act of moral imbecility and that is precisely what Tucker Carlson did,” Shapiro said, criticizing other Republican commentators, including Megyn Kelly, for failing to condemn Candace Owens and other antisemitic, conspiracy theory-spreading individuals.

“The conservative movement is also in danger from charlatans who claim to speak in the name of principle but actually traffic in conspiracism and dishonesty,” Shapiro said. “Those of us with a microphone have a moral obligation to call that out by name.”

Owens has baselessly charged Israel with being involved in Kirk’s murder.

A day later, in response to Shapiro’s speech, Owens posted on X, “Every time Ben speaks I feel more certain Israel is involved in [Kirk’s killing],” adding that “Ben only cares about Israel’s interests.

So Israel is involved.”

During Carlson’s speech a few hours later, he claimed Shapiro’s critiques amounted to calls for censorship.

“Deplatforming and denouncing people at a Charlie Kirk event. I’m like, what? It’s hilarious,” Carlson said, rejecting charges of antisemitism and claiming that racism against white men is far worse than Jew-hatred.

Carlson argued that there is no civil war in MAGA, blaming tensions on a group of Republicans who oppose Vice President JD Vance’s 2028 candidacy.

Vance has yet to confirm whether he’s running, but he was endorsed on Thursday by Kirk’s widow, Erika.

“We are going to get my husband’s friend JD Vance elected for 48 in the most resounding way possible,” she said to applause.

“Trump created this amazing coalition, bringing in people who had never voted Republican before … and that coalition took over the most powerful government in the history of the world,” Carlson told crowds on Thursday.

“So there’s a lot of blood at stake here, as the question becomes, who gets to run it after, who gets the machinery when the president exits the scene,” he added.

“There are a lot of people in Washington,

maybe even in this room, who aren’t quite sure what they want, but they know they don’t want — JD Vance.”

Steve Bannon, who advised President Donald Trump during his 2016 campaign, also spoke at the event and was applauded by thousands when he said Ben Shapiro is like a spreading “cancer” who puts Israel before the United States.

Free Child Care in New Mexico

On Saturday, New Mexico became the first state in the U.S. to make free child care available for all residents. Officials hope the move will help the state’s economy and boost its low education and child welfare levels.

In New Mexico, all families, no matter how wealthy, are entitled to receive public and private child care fee vouchers.

New York City mayor-elect Zohran Mamdani has made similar proposals. The policy is an increasingly popular one in Democratic areas, including Connecticut, which made child care free for those with an income of less than $100,000.

The New Mexican government has said the program’s success rests on the state’s ability to create around 14,000 additional child care slots and hire 5,000 teachers. New Mexico is boosting entry-level staff’s minimum wage from $12 to $18 per hour. “[Child care] is the backbone of creating a system of support for families that allows them to work, to go to college, to do all the things they need to do to continue to lift New Mexico out of poverty,” said Governor Michelle Lujan Grisham.

The state’s universal child care program is expected to cost $600 million annually. New Mexico has around 2.1 million residents. The state plans to pay for the program with interest from its Early Childhood Education and Care Fund, which has raised about $10 billion since 2020 from oil and gas taxes.

Norway and Belgium have free universal child care for children younger than three, while Bulgaria offers free education for all kids until they start elementary school. New Mexico’s free child care program will apply to children until age

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13.

New Mexico’s reading levels are lower than the national average, and around 18% of residents live in poverty. Officials hope cheaper child care will help address those issues.

Rep. Rebecca Dow, a Republican New Mexico congresswoman, criticized the move, proposing that families should be allowed to choose between free child care and a monthly $1,200 state tax credit that would help a parent stay home with their children. She added that research demonstrates that young children develop best when they spend time in a good home.

Trump Drug Pricing Deals

In an effort to lower drug prices, President Donald Trump, on Friday, announced “Most Favored Nation” pricing at the White House with nine drugmakers: Amgen, Boehringer Ingelheim, Bristol Myers Squibb, Genentech, Gilead, GSK, Merck, Novartis, and Sanofi.

Additionally, Trump said he would soon meet with health insurers to convince them to lower premiums.

Before the voluntary agreements went through on Friday, Trump unveiled a “TrumpRx” direct-to-consumer website with discounted drug prices and made deals with five other pharmaceutical companies, including Pfizer.

As part of the deal, the pharmaceutical companies have agreed to sell their drugs to Medicaid at “Most Favored Nation” prices and to lower prices for new medications. Bristol Myers Squibb announced that it would be selling Eliquis, its popular blood thinner, to Medicaid for free. Meanwhile, Merck will lower the price for its Januvia diabetes medication on TrumpRx from $330 to $100; Gilead will decrease the price of its Hepatitis C drug, Epclusa, from $24,920 to $2,425; and GSK will price its asthma inhaler Advair Diskus 500/50 at $89 instead of $265.

The nine companies that Trump met with on Friday also agreed to collectively invest over $150 billion in research and development and new manufacturing projects, in exchange for which they’ll get a break on select pharmaceutical import tariffs. A number of companies have also said they would donate active pharmaceutical ingredients (APIs) for the national emergency stockpile that Trump started in his first term.

Most drugs are not covered by the agreements, and how the deal will impact the public is unclear. If anything, the agreements will likely bring down prices for popular GLP-1 drugs, including Wegovy and Zepbound.

5 Wind Projects Suspended On Monday, the Trump administration suspended the leases of five major offshore wind projects — Massachusetts’ Vineyard Wind; Revolution Wind in Connecticut and Rhode Island; Coastal Virginia Offshore Wind, as well as Sunrise Wind and Empire Wind, two New York projects — citing national security risks.

“The prime duty of the United States

government is to protect the American people,” Interior Secretary Doug Burgum, whose department oversees offshore wind, stated. “Today’s action addresses emerging national security risks, including the rapid evolution of the relevant adversary technologies, and the vulnerabilities created by large-scale offshore wind projects with proximity near our east coast population centers.”

According to the Trump administration, the Defense Department and Interior Department are working on ways to prevent security issues, though they did not specify any of the risks. Until then, the projects have been paused indefinitely.

President Donald Trump has long sought to crack down on wind energy production. Two weeks before his administration’s move on Monday, a federal judge, Judge Patti Saris of the U.S. District Court for the District of Massachusetts, ruled against a Trump executive order that blocked wind energy projects.

The move was condemned by wind proponents, questioning the pause’s legality.

According to the Interior Department, unclassified findings indicate that massive turbine blades’ movement and the highly reflective towers can create a type of radar interference known as “clutter,” thus leaving the United States susceptible to attacks.

Kirk Lippold, a national security expert and former USS Cole commander, and Sen. Sheldon Whitehouse, a Democrat of Rhode Island, argued that the projects’ safety had been previously verified by the federal government.

A Wheelchair in Space

Blue Origin, Amazon founder Jeff Bezos’ space company, made history on

Saturday, launching the first-ever flight to space with a wheelchair user.

Michaela Benthaus, an aerospace engineer from Germany, became the first wheelchair user to go to space. In 2018, Benthaus suffered a spinal cord injury in a mountain biking accident.

During her ten-minute journey to space, Benthaus was joined by Joey Hyde, a physicist-investor; Neal Milch, an entrepreneur; Jason Stansell, an adventurer; and Adonis Pouroulis, a South African entrepreneur and mining engineer. Also accompanying her was Hans Koenigsmann, a former SpaceX manager and German engineer who is a naturalized U.S. citizen, who helped arrange the trip and trained Benthaus.

The trip, which was delayed for two days due to last-minute technical problems, launched from the company’s West Texas launch pad on Saturday at 9:15 a.m. EST, firing into mostly clear skies over 65 miles high, where the crew was able to experience weightlessness and look at Earth.

The flight’s price was unclear, though estimates suggest it might have cost $500,000 per person.

The flight marks the New Shepard rocket’s 16th trip, having brought 92 people to space.

Plane Crash Kills NASCAR Driver

A Cessna C550 business jet crashed in western North Carolina last Thursday at 10:15 a.m. local time while landing at Iredell County’s Statesville Regional Airport, killing all seven people on board, including retired NASCAR legend Greg Biffle, his wife Cristina, his children, 5-year-old Ryder and 14-year-old Emma, as well as Craig Wadsworth, Dennis Dutton, and Dutton’s son Jack.

The Federal Aviation Administration and the National Transportation Safety Board (NTSB) are investigating the incident.

According to flight path tracker FlightAware, Biffle’s plane was headed for Florida but, due to severe weather, wound up turning around and attempting to go back

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to Statesville soon after takeoff.

“Heavy drizzle and a cloud ceiling near 1,200 feet were reported at 10:15 a.m.,” Dan DePodwin, the forecasting operations vice president of AccuWeather, said. “The cloud ceiling had reportedly lowered to around 400 feet, with heavy rain reducing visibility to less than 2 miles at 10:30 a.m. Weather conditions are often a critical factor that investigators carefully review after a plane crash.

It may take months to a year or longer for investigators to determine if the weather conditions contributed to the crash.”

Biffle, a nominee for induction into the NASCAR Hall of Fame, was days away from his 56th birthday. His NASCAR career started in 1989 when he competed in the NASCAR Northwest Series. He debuted in the NASCAR Cup Series in 2002.

For 14 years, from 2003 to 2016, he was a full-time Cup Series driver; he won 19 times and secured 92 top-five finishes and 175 top 10s. His first Cup win was at the Daytona International Speedway, NASCAR’s most well-known track, on July 5, 2004.

Biffle won several awards, including the 2024 National Motorsports Press Association Myers Brothers Award. In 2023, NASCAR named him one of its 75 greatest drivers. As of 2025, he was still competing in races part-time.

“He was a beloved member of the NASCAR community, a fierce competitor, and a friend to so many,” NASCAR said.

“His passion for racing, his integrity, and his commitment to fans and fellow competitors alike made a lasting impact on the sport.”

“Beyond his racing career, he gave of himself for the betterment of our community,” NASCAR added, noting that Biffle, a licensed pilot, piloted relief flights for people impacted by Hurricane Helene.

The crash is the latest fatal aviation incident of 2025. This year has seen over 1,300 aviation incidents, 252 of which were deadly.

November 26 Lotto drawing, earning a prize of £1,000,000 – the equivalent of $1,337,925 in the United States.

The couple said their prize was the result of four consecutive Lotto drawings that brought them luck.

“When you match two numbers in the Lotto draw, you automatically win a Lucky Dip for the next game. That’s what’s happened to us,” Richard explained. “We matched two numbers and won a free Lucky Dip for the draw on [November 15]. That put us into the next draw and so on, until the winning draw on Wednesday, 26 of November.”

The duo previously collected the same prize amount from a EuroMillions Millionaire Maker in June 2018.

“We knew the odds of it happening again were outrageous, but we’re proof that if you believe, anything is possible,” Faye said.

How to spend all that cash is a great question for the two of them.

“The first time around, we gifted people cars, we donated a minibus to the local rugby team and did our best to help friends and family,” Richard said. “It was all new and it was amazing to be able to make a difference. This time, who knows?

We’ll take our time and enjoy the moment.”

It’s good they have that second time to think about it…

A Pretty Penny

Double Draws Richard Davies and his wife Faye Stevenson-Davies are lucky people. They won the EuroMillions Millionaire Maker lottery seven years ago.

But luck does strike twice.

Three weeks ago, the British couple scored a prize worth $1,337,925 from the UK’s National Lottery. They matched the five numbers and Bonus Ball in the

When is a penny worth more than just a cent? When collectors are buying Last Thursday, the U.S. Mint sold 232 three-cent sets for a whopping sum of $16.76 million at an auction hosted by Stack’s Bowers Galleries.

The 232nd set — containing the last three pennies ever made — sold for

$800,000. That bidder also got the three dies that struck those Lincoln cents.

John Kraljevich, director of numismatic Americana at Stack’s Bowers, said it was the kind of auction where you don’t know the items’ market value until people make their bids.

“I’ve been going to coin auctions for 40 years, and I can tell you, I’ve never seen anything like this, because there’s never been anything like this,” Kraljevich said.

Stack’s Bowers President Brian Kendrella noted, “They captured the public imagination like few rare coins we’ve ever handled.”

Each set comprised 2025 pennies struck at the Philadelphia Mint, the Denver Mint and a 24-karat gold penny to cap off the end of an era. Each cent also bore a unique Omega symbol.

There were 232 grouplets to reflect each year the coin had been embedded in American culture.

“American culture has incorporated the penny into our lexicon, into our pop culture, into all of this stuff,” Kraljevich said. “And I think for a lot of people, the ending of production of cents for circulation is an item of nostalgia.”

Makes a lot of sense.

Dark Days

The Swedish are used to dark winter days. But this year, December was particularly bleak in Stockholm, the capital, with just a half-hour of sunlight recorded in the first half of December.

If trends continue, this may just be the darkest December since 1934 for the city.

Meteorologist Viktor Bergman at the Swedish Meteorological and Hydrological Institute (SMHI) noted, “We’ve had unstable low pressure systems with mild and humid weather, and that brings lots of clouds. There hasn’t been a chance for the skies to clear. The sun has also been weak, and its rays have not been able to clear away the clouds,” he said.

The average amount of sunlight in Stockholm for the full month of December is around 33 hours, according to data compiled from 1991 to 2020.

The darkest December ever recorded

in the Swedish capital was in 1934, when the amount of sunlight was so minimal it was “rounded down to zero hours,” Bergman said.

Other parts of Sweden have fared better this December, with the southeastern town of Karlskrona registering the most sunlight in the country so far, at 12 hours.

Stockholm has also had no real snowfall this winter, contributing to the sense of darkness as the reflection from snow on the ground helps brighten surroundings.

Can someone please turn on the lights?

Root Beer Cologne

Love root beer? Want to smell like it all the time?

You’re just in luck. MUG Root Beer is releasing its first-ever limited edition cologne.

The frothy beverage-type scent is adorned with a bulldog’s image inside the box that resembles a MUG can, which represents the brand’s mascot named “Dog.” “(The cologne is) an irresistible root beer coded aroma of cedar, sandalwood, vanilla, and caramel,” a MUG press release reads. “It’s the kind of scent that whispers ‘come to papa’ to dogs and dawgs alike.”

The 1.7 fl. oz. cologne comes with a ten-pack of MUG Root Beer mini cans for a charming $15. A limited run of 200 bottles will exclusively feature MUG’s mascot, Dog, on the cap.

“Fragrance culture is notoriously serious and heavily aspirational. For us, that meant thinking about what scent would make Dog and our fans come running,” said Michael Smith, Vice President, Mug Root Beer, in a release. “Daddy’s Home

by Mug Root Beer is for our die-hard MUG fans who believe root beer rules every sense, not just taste.”

Just in case you’re wondering, this product is not intended for dogs. Just humans who love the smell of old root beer all over their clothes.

Un-beer-able.

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DECEMBER 25, 2025 | The Jewish Home

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Community Chabad of the Five Towns Lights Up Chanukah

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his Chanukah, the Five Towns community showed up in a powerful way. Streets throughout the neighborhood were filled with Jewish pride as Chabad of the Five Towns hosted over 20 Chanukah events, welcoming nearly 5,000 community members.

Across the Five Towns, 12 Grand Meno-

rahs shone brightly outdoors, including the largest menorah in Cedarhurst Park, which was lit every night and became a central gathering place for the community.

Highlights included Hebrew School Jewish Pride on Ice, the Grand Gelt Drop, Glow Night, the Car Menorah Parade

with over 50 decorated cars, and a soldout drive-in concert with Joey Newcomb, featuring 400 cars and thousands celebrating together. The week also included a moving Solidarity Evening at the Menorah, joined by community leaders and attended by hundreds.

In addition to large public celebra-

tions, Chabad’s dancing dreidels visited dozens of homes, bringing Chanukah joy to individuals and families throughout the community. Together, these moments reflected the true spirit of Chanukah: public pride, shared celebration, and light reaching every corner of the Five Towns.

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DECEMBER 25, 2025 | The Jewish Home

The Jewish Home | DECEMBER 25, 2025

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Around the Community

Friendship Circle Chanukah Recap

Pesach Osina at the FDNY Ner Tamid Menorah Lighting

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n the fourth night of Chanukah, the Friendship Circle held its annual Chanukah Bowl at Woodmere Lanes. The party, which was co-hosted by Shulamith High School, was an unforgettable experience. Participants and volunteers had a blast bowling and enjoyed exciting arts and crafts and delicious doughnuts. Smiles were seen all around.

The special event was capped off by a beautiful menorah lighting. The alley’s bowling pin menorah was lit by Isaac Koffski, who was accompanied by one of our wonderful participants’ fathers, Mr. Yudi Simon, on the drums. It was an exciting, memorable, and meaningful experience.

The Friendship Circle has more fun in store this winter! Next week, we’re

hosting two exciting day trips. We’re heading to the Jewish Children’s Museum and Launch Trampoline Park for two days of non-stop fun! If you’re interested in registering your child or learning more, please contact Batsheva@chabad5towns.com.

We’re looking forward to another season of smiles and memories!

The Friendship Circle, a project of Chabad of the Five Towns, is an organization dedicated to bringing joy and friendship to the lives of individuals with disabilities. With help from our teen volunteers, we offer a wide range of exciting weekly and monthly programs.

If you are interested in volunteering, donating, or joining the Friendship Circle family, please visit fc5towns.com for more information.

A Fun-Filled Chanukah Experience at Gan Chamesh

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an Chamesh celebrated Chanukah with an amazing Chanukah Experience. Parents and children joined together to engage in Chanukah activities, ranging from decorating doughnuts to constructing the Bais

Hamikdash out of individually decorated bricks, to marveling at the wonders of a Chanukah light museum and much more. The fun-filled day helped the children internalize the beauty and lessons of Chanukah.

Jam-Packed Chanukah at YCQ

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CQ’s Chanukah celebrations were truly jam-packed, or should we say jelly-filled?

After a day off on Monday, the festivities kicked off on Tuesday with the uplifting sounds of Hallel echoing throughout the halls. Students dove into a variety of exciting activities, including a mesmerizing Bubble Show for the Early Childhood and Chanukah-themed Bingo for Grades 1 and 2. Meanwhile, students in Grades 1 through 8 put their knowledge to the test during a high-energy competition with Game-On Trivia.

A major highlight of the day was the privilege for Grades 5 through 8 to hear from two remarkable guest speakers.

The boys were moved by Jennie Landsman’s story of resilience and her tireless fight for treatment for her two sons’ rare disease. Simultaneously, the girls heard from Estee Ackerman, a table-tennis star who gave up her Olympic dreams by refusing to play on Shabbat. Both speakers left the students in awe of their courage, commitment, and strength of character.

On Wednesday, the Junior High School dedicated their day to chesed, visiting local nursing homes and performing acts of kindness throughout Queens.

Their efforts brought light and joy to the community, beautifully embodying the

spirit of the holiday. Back on campus, students in Grades N through 2 enjoyed an interactive Small Wonder Puppet Show that brought the Chanukah story to life, while Grades 1 through 5 had a delicious time decorating donuts.

The energy stayed high through Thursday as students across all grades enjoyed a “Silent DJ” experience. Guided by DJ Eli Arshadnia, students donned headphones to dance and celebrate the miracles of Chanukah. The sight of everyone showing off their moves in a silent room brought laughter and fun to all. The Junior High also got in on the sweetness with their own donut-decorating session.

The staff joined in the celebrations as well, enjoying a festive Faculty Luncheon hosted by the administration. A special thank you goes to the YCQ PTO and the families who contributed to the thoughtful hakarat hatov gifts for the faculty.

Friday’s shortened schedule featured a JHS brunch, special Early Childhood activities, and competitive dreidel tournaments for Grades 1 through 8. The festivities officially wrapped up on Monday as Early Childhood students dazzled their families with delightful performances in their Chanukah plays led by Morah Tali Brody.

A heartfelt thank you to everyone who made Chanukah so memorable!

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DECEMBER 25, 2025 | The Jewish Home

Around the Community

The Jewish Home | DECEMBER 25, 2025

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Hempstead Town Supervisor John Ferretti joined Rabbi Mendel Gordon at the Chabad of Hewlett Neck and Old Woodmere menorah lighting this week

Hempstead Town Supervisor John Ferretti, Lawrence Village Mayor Shlomo Nahmias, Trustee Aroni Parnes, Deputy Mayor Aaron Felder, Trustee Tammy Roz and Rabbi Yechezkel Freundlich of Congregation Beth Sholom at the lighting of the menorah at Lawrence Village Hall this week

Chanukah at YHT: A Week Full of Light, Laughter, and Lots of Fun

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eshiva Har Torah was buzzing with excitement all week long, with so many fun activities happening across both campuses—the Early Learning Center (ELC) and the Grand Central Campus (GCP). Students and staff celebrated Chanukah in true YHT style, filling the halls with music, movement, and school spirit.

From festive dress-up days to glow-inthe-dark dance parties, the energy was nonstop. Students showed off their creativity during spirited lip-sync battles, cheered loudly at teacher-versus-student sports games, and enjoyed a jam-packed

Chanukah carnival. Learning came to life through hands-on experiences like making their own oil, searching high and low during candle scavenger hunts, and exploring the meaning of the holiday in fun and meaningful ways.

Singing and dancing could be heard

throughout both campuses all week long, with special inter-grade activities that brought students together to learn and celebrate side by side. One of the highlights was the “Make Your Own Menorah” contest, where students proudly shared their creativity and enthusiasm.

Throughout the week, both the ELC and GCP were filled with joyful moments, shared experiences, and plenty of Chanukah spirit—making it a celebration enjoyed by students, teachers, and staff across the YHT community.

Touro University Researchers Discover that a Hormone Can Access the Brain by Hitchhiking

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esearchers at Touro University Nevada have discovered that tiny particles in the blood, called extracellular vesicles (EVs), are a major player in how a group of hormones are shuttled through the body. Physical exercise can stimulate this process. The findings, published in the journal Proceedings of the National Academy of Sciences (PNAS), open the door to deeper understanding of hormone circulation and access to the brain, how exercise may trigger changes in energy balance, mental health, and immune function, and circulation of certain drugs.

Blood and other body fluids are teeming with EVs—tiny particles that exist outside of cells. EVs transmit signals from cell-to-cell within tissues and long distance across organ systems by delivering biological cargo such as proteins, lipids, and nucleic acids into cells. They also remove cell waste.

Scientists have known that EVs play

key roles, from the immune response to cancer progression, but much less is known about how they might interact with hormones.

The researchers focused on a hormone precursor called proopiomelanocortin (POMC), which transforms into a range of hormones including endorphins (responsible for the runner’s high) and adrenocorticotropic hormone (ACTH), which manages the body’s stress response. Because exercise has been previously associated with these hormones, the researchers used exercise to provoke changes to shed light on interactions between POMC and EVs. The study found that vigorous exercise causes four times more POMC to hitch a ride on the EVs. “This study doesn’t just show an ‘exercise effect’ but it reveals a new biological mechanism where stress from exercise makes EVs temporarily act as hormone transport shuttles in the bloodstream,”

explains the study’s first author Mark Santos, Ph.D., assistant professor at Touro.

The study also found that in the lab, EV-bound POMC can cross human blood vessel barriers, including the blood-brain barrier, more efficiently than POMC alone.

Since POMC must be processed into so-called “mature” hormones to initiate a response in the notoriously difficult-to-ac-

cess brain, more work is required to understand how the exercise-induced rise in POMC affects the brain.

“The observation that EVs can carry POMC has so many potential directions,” says Aurelio Lorico, MD, PhD, professor of pathology at Touro and co-senior author on the study. “It may have wide-ranging implications, for pain management, metabolism and obesity, inflammation, and the stress response,” he says.

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DECEMBER 25, 2025 | The Jewish Home

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A Special Birthday at TAG

The Jewish Home | DECEMBER 25, 2025

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The BACH Jewish Center partnered with the Long Beach Police Department to deliver holiday toys and care packages to hospital-bound children at Mount Sinai South Nassau in Oceanside. The BACH’s Rabbi Benny Berlin, Police Department Commissioner Richard DePalma, and members of his department hand-delivered the toys and care packages to the hospital on December 22.

Bikur Cholim Uplifts Chanukah

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hile many people celebrate birthdays with big parties and lavish gifts, the Cinamon family came up with a most meaningful and beautiful tribute to their wife and mother, Mrs. Barbara Cinamon. For this special birthday, her family dedicated her office in Machon Sarah TAG High School.

As part of the TAG family for close to forty years, Mrs. Cinamon was a beloved English teacher, Department Head, College Guidance Counselor and later took on the mantle as Assistant Principal.

Some of the teachers, both past and present, joined in the celebration, in-

cluding Mrs. Hannah Bayarin, Mrs. Devora Stern, Mrs. Judith Wernick and Mrs. Sharon Senderowicz. Her family proudly joined this special occasion and heard words of praise from Mr. Howard Cinamon who spoke so beautifully about his wife. Rabbi Meyer Weitman, current Dean of TAG, also spoke warm words of appreciation about her many accomplishments during her long tenure at TAG. It was a fitting gesture from the Cinamon family to make this special gift, in addition to sharing the gift of Mrs. Cinamon with TAG for so many years. .

Fire Safety at YOSS: A Chanukah Lesson to Remember

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ikur Cholim of Far Rockaway + Five Towns, a leading force of chessed in our community, brought warmth, connection, and Chanukah cheer to those who needed it most throughout the yom tov. Through visits, candle lightings, gift distributions, and uplifting programs at local facilities in-

cluding The Premier and The Nautilus, Bikur Cholim helped ensure that residents felt remembered and cared for during Chanukah. These efforts were strengthened through partnerships with community schools, youth groups, and Chasdei Devorah.

n honor of Chanukah, the second graders at Yeshiva of South Shore enjoyed a special and important visit focused on fire safety. Mr. Sebag, a local firefighter from the Hewlett Fire Department and proud YOSS parent, came to speak with Mrs. Sebag’s class as well as the entire second grade about how to stay safe around fire.

Mr. Sebag showed the boys the special equipment he uses every day to fight fires and explained how each tool helps keep people safe. He also reviewed important fire safety rules, such as “stop, drop, and roll” helping the students learn what to do in case of an emergency; especially during Chanukah, when candles and fire play a bigger role in our homes.

The boys were excited to see the firefighter gear up close and were fully engaged throughout the presentation. By the end of the visit, they walked away with a strong understanding of the basics of fire safety and a greater appreciation for the work firefighters do. As a special

treat, the boys were given firefighter badges to take home!

We always love welcoming community helpers into Yeshiva of South Shore, and it is especially meaningful when they are part of our own YOSS family. Thanks to Mr. Sebag’s engaging presentation, our second graders were extra safe and informed this Chanukah!

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DECEMBER 25, 2025 | The Jewish Home

The Jewish Home | DECEMBER 25, 2025

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Around the Community

Chessed on the Move at TAG Chanukah at Siach Yitzchok included a mesiba, magic show, the iconic Dreidel Drop, and a special learning seder

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t Torah Academy for Girls, our junior high eighth grade talmidos not only learn about the importance of chessed, they go out to find it. On Thanksgiving, the girls volunteered their time at The Special Children’s Center where they were warmly welcomed and where they made new friends. The trip was coordinated by Mrs. Tovah Ackerman, who serves as the principal in General Studies in the High School.

Likewise, with Chanukah coming, the eighth grade talmidos went to the JCCRP’S Holocaust Survivors Chanukah party. The girls loved connecting with these brave survivors and added cheer to

the festivities. Pictured here are Allison Deal, the director of the JCCRP, along with our assemblywoman, Stacey Pfeffer Amato, with one of the survivors and the TAG talmidos.

Celebrating Chanukah at HALB and Lev Chana

Shulamith Brings Chanukah Joy to Premier Nursing Home

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uring the busy and exciting days of Chanukah, a group of Shulamith School for Girls’ eighth grade students chose to dedicate their own time to bring light and simcha to others. The girls visited the Woodmere Premier Nursing Home and Rehabilitation Center to celebrate Chanukah with the residents in a truly meaningful way.

This special program was entirely student-initiated. The girls themselves approached the school and requested to organize a Chanukah visit, specifically asking to schedule it during Chanukah so they could share the true spirit of Chanukah with others. Their thoughtfulness and enthusiasm were evident throughout the evening. During the visit, the students lit Chanukah candles, sang Chanukah songs, colored festive Chanukah pictures alongside the residents, and ran a lively Chanukah trivia game that brought smiles, laughter, and meaningful interaction to everyone involved. The impact of the visit extended well beyond the walls of the nursing home. Parents later

shared with the school that, out of all the nights of Chanukah, this experience was the highlight of their daughters’ Chanukah—a powerful testament to how meaningful acts of chesed can be for both the giver and the recipient.

Shulamith is incredibly proud of its 8th grade girls for their initiative, compassion, and commitment to helping others. Their actions reflect the school’s emphasis on chesed and the importance of living Torah values in real and lasting ways. By choosing to bring light to others, these students truly embodied the message of Chanukah.

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hanukah week was amazing at HALB! Our staff were treated to a delicious lunch at Lev Chana and HALB. It was a wonderful opportunity for the teachers and staff to spend time together and enjoy themselves during the

workday. Lev Chana and HALB both had doughnut making with their teachers, and the Chagigas were incredible!

Congratulations to the Menorah Contest winners! Everyone did a great job!

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DECEMBER 25, 2025 | The Jewish Home

The Jewish Home | DECEMBER 25, 2025

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Around the Community

“Time for TAG” Marks 10 Years of Transforming Girls’ Education

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his year, the TAG Resource Center is celebrating a remarkable milestone: 10 years of its “Time for TAG” campaign. For a full decade, the campaign has united the community in support of an initiative that has become essential to the success of many TAG students, providing individualized guidance, resources, and encouragement to help every girl reach her full potential.

TAG has been a cornerstone of Torah education for more than 60 years, nurturing generations of young women with a strong foundation in learning, values, and confidence. One of the highlights of our mission is the TAG Resource Center, one of the school’s most significant accomplishments. From preschool through 12th grade, more than 300 students benefit from instruction tailored to their individual learning styles—at no extra cost to their families. Through this personalized approach, countless talmidos have gained clarity, confidence, and the skills

they need to excel academically.

The Resource Center is about more than learning. It’s about giving every girl the tools and self-assurance to succeed in high school, seminary, career, and life.

Our educators guide each student with warmth, patience, and creativity, and the results are transformative.”

As “Time for TAG” celebrates its 10th anniversary, the campaign carries even deeper meaning. It’s a testament to the power of community support and the difference that collective dedication can make in the lives of students. This year’s fundraising goal is $500,000, which will ensure the Resource Center can continue to provide its vital services and maintain the high level of support that students have come to rely on.

The success of the Resource Center is driven by its remarkable educators.

These dedicated teachers do more than deliver lessons—they mentor, encourage, and guide each girl to reach her full po-

tential. They ensure that every student is seen, understood, and supported in her educational journey.

Community support has been the backbone of “Time for TAG” since its inception. For 10 years, donors have stepped forward to ensure that every student receives the guidance and resources she needs. This ongoing partnership between families, alumnae, and community members has transformed the Resource Center into a nurturing environment where girls can thrive academically and personally.

Rabbi Baruch Lovett emphasizes the importance of continued support: “Your contribution isn’t just a donation—it’s an investment in the future of our students.

Every gift helps ensure that the Resource Center can keep providing the individualized instruction and encouragement that makes such a difference in these girls’ lives.”

As “Time for TAG” enters its second

decade, the campaign is both a celebration and a call to action. Community members are invited to participate and make a tangible impact on the lives of students who rely on the Resource Center to thrive. Every donation strengthens the foundation of Torah education and helps maintain a program that has proven its value for generations.

“We’re incredibly grateful for 10 years of ‘Time for TAG’ and for the community’s unwavering belief in the power of Torah education for our girls,” Rabbi Lovett says. “This anniversary is a chance to reflect on what we’ve accomplished together and to invest in the future of our talmidos.”

Time for TAG is a celebration of what can happen when a community comes together. 10 years of support, 10 years of partnership, and 10 years of transforming lives—this is a milestone worth recognizing and a mission worth supporting.

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DECEMBER 25, 2025 | The Jewish Home

The Jewish Home | DECEMBER 25, 2025

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Around the Community

Chanukah at MTA

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hanukah at MTA was filled with meaningful moments that brought together Torah, tefillah, and powerful yeshiva achdus. Over the course of the week, talmidim experienced Chanukah not just as a celebration, but as a lived experience of connection and growth.

The week opened with an uplifting musical Hallel during Shacharis, led

by Rabbi Yaakov Fuchs, setting a joyful and inspiring tone. Later that morning, talmidim reconnected with last year’s rebbeim for special shiurim, creating a sense of continuity and appreciation for the relationships that shape their learning journey. The day wrapped up with an energetic grade versus grade dodgeball tournament that brought out excitement, teamwork, and classic MTA ruach.

The highlight of the week was the Chanukah Chagigah, featuring special guest Mendy Worch from Thank You Hashem.

With dancing, singing and a kumzitz, the chagigah captured the heart of Chanukah at MTA. The energy in the room was electric as talmidim and rebbeim came together in a moment of pure joy and inspiration. A Chanukah fried food buffet and a lively Chinese auction drawing added to the excitement and made the Chagigah even more memorable.

Chanukah ruach extended well beyond the walls of the yeshiva with a special dorm Chanukah program. Talmidim brought the simcha into the streets of Washington Heights with singing and dancing, proudly spreading the light of Chanukah throughout the neighborhood.

The program also featured a special shiur from Rav Meir Goldvicht, giving talmidim a meaningful opportunity to connect to deep Torah inspiration during the Yom Tov. Midweek, talmidim spent the day visiting their rebbeim in their homes, an

opportunity that deepened relationships and offered meaningful time beyond the walls of the yeshiva. These personal moments reflected the warmth and care that define the MTA rebbe and talmid relationship.

The Chanukah program concluded with creativity and fun through “Escape the Yeshiva,” followed by latkes for talmidim and a faculty luncheon in appreci-

ation of the dedicated faculty and staff who make MTA the great yeshiva that it is.

Chanukah at MTA was a celebration of light in every sense. Through Torah, music, relationships, and shared moments, the yeshiva shone brightly, reminding us that the greatest light is created when a community comes together.

delight of their proud teachers.

The children also made gifts for their families, including pot holders, drip mats, and Chanukah decorated trivets.

The children thoroughly enjoyed playing interactive Chanukah Bingo games and perfected their dreidel spinning skills.

Throughout the week, all of their learning revolved around Chanukah mitzvot and traditions.

As you walked through the halls of the Early Childhood wing, you could hear delightful voices singing songs and practicing dances for their upcoming Chanukah Interactive Programs that they shared with their parents and special guests.

Morah Kayli, the EC music teacher, was busy working with each class to prepare them for the upcoming festive performances. On the day of each class’s Chanukah party, the children wore their Chanukah crowns and hand created shields of dreidels and candles.

The children sang, danced and then visited various centers with their parents. The centers

included: decorating doughnuts, creating an edible menorah with a graham cracker base, veggie strips for candles and chocolate chips as flames, matching games, a Chanukah decoration center and a sensory table with shaving cream.

The Kindergarten classes made a beautiful presentation all in Hebrew, including songs and dances that they had learned from Morah Kayli and their teachers. After a sparkling performance which brought so much nachat to their families and their teachers, the parents joined their children to dance and enjoy the Chanukah experience together. “In light of the tragic events in Australia,” remarked Rabbi Ouriel Hazan, Head of Nursery through Eighth grades, “seeing the children sing Hatikva is a testament to our resilience and faith in a better future for our people.” Morah Trudy Rubinstein, Director of HANC Early Childhood Center, stated, “What a great week for our youngest yeladim!”

HANC ECC Celebrates Chanukah

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he young children in HANC’s Early Childhood Division in the Reinstein Family Campus in West Hempstead had an exciting week of Chanukah celebrations. As they explored the holiday, they have been developing and practicing a myriad of skills and had so much fun learning as the Chanukah week progressed. After examining different types of Chanukiot, each class designed and created their own style of interactive counting menorah using an assortment of materials. The children also created their own Chanukiot to display, but not

light, which adorned their windowsills at home. Some menorahs were created with tiles, and others replicated the style of the Israeli artist Agam. Incorporating their counting and patterning skills, they prepared their creative masterpieces to the

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DECEMBER 25, 2025 | The Jewish Home

The Jewish Home | DECEMBER 25, 2025

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Around the Community

Niggun Chabura Ignites Chanukah: Three Transformative Musical Events

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iggun Chabura experienced a vibrant Chanukah this year, producing three distinct events across the community, each uniting a diverse array of musical artists around a common mission: integrating Torah and music to inspire deeper fire in Torah, tefillah, and avodas Hashem.

The first event, a pre-Chanukah “Bring the Light” program, was held at Yeshivas Heichal HaTorah in Teaneck for the high school talmidim. The evening featured an impressive lineup including Avi Wisniki, Dovid Pearlman, Dovid Rotberg, Yosef Kugler, and Shlomo Zomick, whose powerful voices with a mix of new songs plus classic Chanukah niggunim uplifted the boys and by the end had them dancing.

They were accompanied by Tani Frisch on guitar, Yitzchak Koyfman on keyboard, and Shmuel Zeigler on drums, creating a professional and energetic soundscape.

Between the sets, Reb Yirmi delivered a timely and penetrating message. He described how the Yevanim once broke

into the Heichal of the Beis HaMikdash to defile the pure oil of the Menorah, and how those same forces still present themselves today—seeking entry into a different heichal: the yeshiva they were currently sitting in, Heichal HaTorah to defile the pure oil, the minds and hearts of the talmidim. Drawing on the idea that ha’shemen shares a root with neshama, he taught that each student is like a precious flask of oil that must be protected.

Torah learning, he emphasized, must remain connected to Hashem through heartfelt, personal tefillah; once Torah becomes “just another subject,” it becomes precisely what the ancient Greeks intended. The students listened deeply, sang along passionately, and concluded the evening with spirited dancing together with the musicians.

On Monday night, Aish Kodesh hosted the second event: “Reveal the Light,” a full-scale concert featuring a colorful cast of talent—Binyamin Apsan, Wernatty, Akiva David, Eli Dachs, and, for

the first time, Gelf. Tani Frisch on guitar, Mordy Dachs on percussion, and David Schwartzman on violin provided rich musical accompaniment. Reb Yirmi used the evening to explore the concept of the ohr haganuz, the primordial light Hashem concealed at the dawn of Creation. He explained that this light is hidden within every Jew and can be revealed through understanding one’s oil, one’s wick, and one’s fire—mesiras nefesh, tefillah, and true emunah in Hashem. The crowd responded with enthusiasm, and the room pulsated with music, energy, and shared inspiration.

The series concluded Tuesday night at The Barn in West Hempstead, where Niggun Chabura collaborated with LAIVY for an intimate session of authentic, spiritually charged music. Reb Yirmi highlighted themes woven throughout LAIVY’s work connecting it to the third night of Chanukah associated with Yaakov Avinu and his middah of emes, the spirit of hoda’ah that defines the holiday, and the importance

of healthy alone time—hisbodedus—as a pathway to inner authenticity and connection with Hashem.

Across all three nights, Niggun Chabura succeeded to create spaces where Torah, music, and heartfelt inspiration merged, leaving communities uplifted and illuminated long after the candles burned down.

Stay tuned for the next Niggun Chabura—where the soul listens, and the heart learns to sing.

Max Levine. Boards 1 and 5 through 8 were more evenly contested, finishing 1-1, with Captain Yosef Gerstley leading board 1, Drake Spodek and Sammy Mayer performing on board 5, Ethan Muller and Jared Pollack on board 6, and Josef Fayzibayev alongside Jacob Hersko, substituting for Nussen Nagel, on board 7. This balanced performance ensured that HAFTR was not swept on any board, highlighting the depth and resilience of the team.

Following the chess match, HAFTR

extended a warm welcome to the visiting Ezra Academy students by inviting them on a tour of the school. The tour concluded in the Scott Satran Arena, where both teams participated in a friendly 3-on-3 pickup basketball game, further fostering school spirit. With this strong and encouraging result, HAFTR’s Chess Team can approach their upcoming matches with confidence, maintaining momentum and focus as they continue what is shaping up to be a highly promising season.

The Niggun Chabura was founded in 2023 by Reb Yirmi Ginsberg, a mashpia in Kehillas Aish Kodesh of Woodmere.

With a vision to fuse Torah and music, Reb Yirmi created a space where soulful niggunim and deep Torah insights come together to inspire and uplift. Follow for the latest shiurim and concerts: on WhatsApp www.tinyurl.com/niggunchat and on Instagram at @theniggunchabura.

Checkmate: HAFTR Chess

By Jakey Aron

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he HAFTR Chess Team, led by Mr. Levy, has been building momentum throughout this year, working on sharpening strategies, strengthening team cohesiveness, and preparing for high-pressure matches. On the morning of Tuesday, December 10, HAFTR’s Chess Team hosted Ezra Academy for a match that would have a significant impact on playoff seeding. After a disappointing previous performance against NSHA, where the team fell short

of expectations, HAFTR entered this match determined to demonstrate its full potential. The team rose to the occasion, ultimately securing a 10-4 victory over Ezra Academy.

Particularly impressive were the performances on boards 2 through 4, each of which went undefeated with 2-0 records. Board 2 was led by the skilled duo of Charlie Mayer and Corey Kwitkin, board 3 saw outstanding play from Ezra Goldstein and Jakey Aron, and board 4 was carried by A.J. Kryksman and

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DECEMBER 25, 2025 | The Jewish Home

The Jewish Home | DECEMBER 25, 2025

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Around the Community

HALB Spelling Bee

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he HALB Middle School Spelling Bee was intense. After the qualifying rounds in each grade, our top spellers in sixth, seventh, and eight grade went up against each other in the ultimate spelling bee for Middle School.

Congratulations to our winners: 1st place - Chaim Doman, 2nd place - Shira Grossman, and 3rd place - Elana Hersh.

North Shore Hebrew Academy Students Honored for Leadership in Building Healthy Jewish Communities

Shabbos is always celebrated in the Ganger Early Childhood Division of TAG. The Pink Kindergarten girls just finished their amazing Shabbos booklets and are looking forward to bringing them home

Hands-On Chanukah at Mercaz Academy

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By Olivia Marcus

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our North Shore Hebrew Academy (NSHA) high school students were recently honored for their leadership after completing a national program focused on fostering healthy relationships and addressing domestic abuse within the Jewish community.

Sofia Asher, Molly Feldschreiber, Eve Gelberg, and Hili Zubli participated in the Purple Fellowship, a new offering from the Shalom Task Force (STF), an organization dedicated to preventing domestic violence and promoting safe, healthy relationships and families. Open to high school juniors and seniors, the fellowship draws participants from Jewish schools across the country. At NSHA, interest in the program grew following the involvement of last year’s seniors.

After a competitive application process, Sofia, Molly, Eve, and Hili — all members of the class of 2026 — were selected to join the nine-week program, which met weekly and was led by STF

staff and guest lecturers. They joined peers in coursework that covered a range of topics, from healthy relationships to red flags, boundaries, supporting friends, stigma, barriers to coming forward, local resources, and event planning.

Upon completion of the program, the students put their newfound leadership skills into action. Working with Ms. Lisa Septimus, NSHA Director of Student Life, they organized “Go Purple Day” to raise awareness among teens about domestic violence and healthy relationships.

For their efforts and demonstrated commitment to Jewish communal work, Sofia, Molly, Eve, and Hili were honored with STF’s Young Leadership Award on Sunday, Dec. 7, at a special brunch hosted by STF at The Sephardic Temple in Cedarhurst, NY. Rabbi Dr. Jeffrey Kobrin, NSHA Head of School/Rosh Yeshiva, and Rabbi Avi Miller, Director of Integrated Judaic studies, were in attendance to show their support.

t Mercaz Academy, students experienced Chanukah this year through doing: creating, moving, tasting, and building their way through the ultimate story of Jewish resilience and pride. The holiday came alive through hands-on, immersive experiences that invited every student to personally participate in the traditions and lessons of Chanukah.

Chanukah Through the Hands: In the Mercaz Menorah Contest, students of every age designed original kosher chanukiyot from everyday materials, echoing the rebuilding of the menorah in the Beit HaMikdash, with an imaginative and personal twist. In a special inter-grade lesson, third graders partnered with kindergarteners to press olives into fresh, pure olive oil, experiencing firsthand the effort behind the miracle at the heart of the Chanukah story.

Chanukah Through the Body: Movement played a central role in the week.

Students used their whole bodies to spin a giant savivon, following Hebrew instructions that had them hopping, skipping, and laughing together. Mixed-grade dreidel games for real gelt brought energy and teamwork. And a lively game of Chanukah Hedbandz sparked collaboration, laughter, and quick thinking as students had to guess the phrases on their headband using only clues from classmates.

Chanukah Through the Senses: Chanukah was also something students could taste – from scratch. Older students har-

vested potatoes from our GrowTorah garden which they turned into home-grown latkes in Farm-to-Table. And on Friday, every student got a delicious chance to fill and decorate their own sufganiya– and learned it’s harder than it looks!

Chanukah Through the Heart: A schoolwide toy drive challenged each class to collect toys for a local charity, giving students a concrete way to practice tzedakah and chesed. The results were overwhelming as our classrooms filled with gifts! And at the PTA Chanukah Chagiga, families gathered to celebrate community with candle lighting, lots of music and dancing, Chanukah treats, and a fundraising raffle.

By engaging students through action, creativity, and community, Chanukah at Mercaz this year was not just learned but lived.

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Around the Community

Morah Ester Davidov’s Pre-1A students writing CVC words with quills and ink, like presidents from years ago did, while learning the letter P

Shulamith ECC hosted a fun-filled Mommy and Me Chanukah Workshop

Shalsheles Learning at YOSS

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head of Chanukah, fathers and grandfathers of talmidim in Rabbi Oberlander’s seventh grade shiur joined together for a morning of Torah learning and inspiration at the third annual Shalsheles Learning Program!

After davening together and enjoying a

deluxe breakfast, they came to the beis medrash and began to learn b’chavrusa. This year, the theme was Chanukah, and Rabbi Oberlander created a kuntres of maareh mekomos on various sugyas.

The kol Torah filled the beis medrash, as three generations learned through the

sugya.

At the end of the program, individual talmidim were given a chance to present their answers and to ask POW questions on the sugya. Rabbi Mordechai Kamenetzky, Rosh Yeshiva, answered their question sand was impressed by the

depth of the questions. It was a morning of true nachas, and all three generations walked away with the type of chizuk that only comes from connecting to Toras Hashem!

Two Times Three is Six: Two Twins Fulfilling Three Mitzvos

By Rabbi Yair Hoffman

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flicker of light through a window.

That was all it took.

This past Shabbos in Sutton Park, two fifteen- or sixteen-year-old twin boys were walking—perhaps to shul, perhaps returning home from shul. As they passed a house once occupied by friends who had since moved away, something caught their attention. Through the glass, an eerie, unnatural glow. They stopped.

They looked closer.

The dining room table was engulfed in flames. Something had fallen onto the Chanukah Menorah.

Inside that home was a young family—parents, small children—utterly unaware that their Shabbos was moments away from becoming a tragedy.

The twins didn’t hesitate. They pound-

ed on the door. No answer. They pounded again, harder. Still nothing. The family, perhaps resting, perhaps singing zemiros in another room, had no idea death was spreading across their table.

Then one brother turned to the other: “I wonder if they kept the same door code.”

They punched in the numbers. The lock clicked open.

Within moments, the boys were inside. Within moments, the fire was out.

Within moments, a family was saved.

In that single act of heroism, each of these young men fulfilled not one, not two, but three mitzvos.

The first is Hashavas Aveidah—the mitzvah of returning a lost object, found in Parshas Ki Seitzei (Devarim 22:2): “Vahashaivoso lo—and you shall return it to him.” The Gemara in Sanhedrin (73a), however, reveals a deeper dimension to

these words. The obligation extends beyond returning lost property; it includes returning “his very life to him.” If a person sees another threatened—whether by drowning, by attackers, or by fire—there is a Torah obligation to intervene. This is the mitzvah referenced by the Shulchan Aruch in Orach Chaim 325.

The second is Lo Sa’amod Al Dam Re’echa—the prohibition against standing idly by while your brother’s blood is shed. This negative commandment, cited in Shulchan Aruch (Choshen Mishpat 426:1) and in the Rambam, transforms passivity in the face of danger into a sin.

The third is Lo Suchal L’hisalaym, “You cannot shut your eyes to it” (Devarim 22:3). This negative commandment, which immediately follows the mitzvah of Hashavas Aveidah, forbids a person from turning away, from pretending not to see. The Netziv in Ha’Emek

She’eilah discusses this mitzvah as well.

Two boys. Three mitzvos each. Six mitzvos in a single Shabbos moment.

But beyond the mitzvos, these young men demonstrated something perhaps even rarer: achrayus—a profound sense of responsibility for others. They didn’t walk past. They didn’t assume someone else would handle it. They didn’t worry about whether it was their place to act.

They saw danger. They moved.

Their parents should beam with pride.

Their yeshiva should hold them up as examples. And somewhere in Shamayim, a remarkable talmid chochom—their grandfather—is surely beaming as well.

He was Rabbi Ralph Pelcovitz, zt”l, one of the foremost pulpit rabbis this country has ever known.

The apples, it seems, have not fallen far from the tree.

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Around the Community

Reflections from the White House Chanukah Party

By Rebbetzin Sara Hopkovitz

“M

aoz Tzor” rang in unison throughout the East Room of the White House, following the lighting of the menorah.

Jews from all walks of life stood proudly celebrating the third night of Chanukah together with Donald J. Trump, President of the United States of America. It felt surreal to be there, but undoubtedly, it was a special occasion to attend.

My husband presented me with an email invite a few weeks ago right before Shabbos. My skeptic mind assumed it was a scam when he showed me the 2025 White House Chanukah Party invitation.

But it was genuine. A good friend of ours with close political ties graciously gifted us with this invite. Shock, excitement, and panic (what will I wear?!) soon followed. There were many details to be arranged for this trip.

The night before the Chanukah party, we stayed at a hotel in D.C. close to the White House, and the next day, we arrived early at the event to go through check-in and security. There were Marines and Secret Service personnel stationed all over, to ensure a safe and smooth program.

Walking through the doors of the White House, we were greeted by a striking foyer with the official “Seal of the President” gracing the entryway. Guests were given access to some additional rooms for viewing, as well. As a museum enthusiast, I especially enjoyed walking around and seeing all the sights. Portraits of former presidents adorned the walls; beautiful artwork and elegant furniture also decorated the venue. I was a very happy tourist and did not hesitate to take pictures. I wasn’t the only one. There were many camera-happy participants taking pictures and videos, like politicians, social media influencers, and other public figures. There were many Jews present from diverse backgrounds and religious affiliations, but overall, there was a unified camaraderie despite our obvious dif-

ferences. We were all Jews. Proud Jews.

Following an impressive buffet, the guests were directed into the East Room for the next portion of the program. A klezmer band entertained the crowd with Jewish classics, including “Shein Vi Di Levone” and, of course, “Havana Negilah.” Shulem Lemmer beautifully belted “G-d Bless America.” There was a Jewish U.S. WWII veteran in attendance, as well as a 102-year-old Holocaust survivor.

Their presence was duly acknowledged and given the upmost respect.

President Trump confidently walked in among a roaring applause. He commenced his speech conveying sympathy for the Australia tragedy and reiterated his commitment and endeavors to eradicate antisemitism from our midst; antisemitism has no place in America. He spoke about the Chanukah story and the mighty Maccabees that fought for the survival of the Jewish nation and were victorious because G-d was on their side.

Throughout history, we have been people of grit and determination. He continued to elaborate on his great friendship to Israel and the Jewish community. Among many things, he recognized Jerusalem as Israel’s capital, and he successfully returned the hostages from the October 7th massacre. An Israeli family had contacted him, pleading for help to get their son back. Aware that the son was no longer alive, he told the parents that he couldn’t guarantee anything with the initial negotiations. The parents were insistent that their son be returned, and President Trump’s response was: There’s some-

thing about your religion that doesn’t allow you to give up on anybody, dead or alive. How true.

Before and during this Chanukah party, I kept on asking myself: Why was I invited? More specifically, Why did Hashem bring me here? I don’t consider myself an affluent and famous person making big waves in the political arena, nor was I delusional to expect a private audience with the President to advocate for any causes. I was even doubtful that I would have an opportunity to mumble a few words in greeting, express the honor of meeting him, and thank him for all the good he does for the Jewish people. And was this scenario similar to the Purim story of the Jews going to Achashveirosh’s party, that was strongly frowned upon or more likely sinful? Perhaps I’m rationalizing to myself and to others, but in my humble opinion, one distinction from the Purim story is that Achashveirosh’s party was to celebrate his miscalculated timeline of the downfall of the Jewish commonwealth – in contrast to this event that primarily displayed appreciation for the Jewish community and its contributions to American society. America overall has been very good to the Jews and should continue to do so for many years to come.

Some additional thoughts of why we were in attendance: my husband and I strongly felt we represented our community and bnei Torah and hope we made a favorable impression. We were proudly religious. It was a highlight for me to see him join a Mincha-Maariv minyan right in the East Room. It was also exception-

al that we had an opportunity to make a rare bracha that is said on meeting a king or a head of state with significant power, “Baruch atah Hashem Elokeinu Melech ha’olam, shenatan mi’k’vodo l’basar v’dam” (Blessed are You, L-rd our G-d, King of the Universe, Who gives from His honor to flesh and blood).

I admit, I felt very patriotic there. I am a proud American. I am a third generation American from all my grandparents, and both my grandfathers served in the United States army during World War II. We are very fortunate to have a president who is a good friend to the Jews – but ultimately, we have to bear in mind what is says in Mishlei (21:1), “A king’s heart is like rivulets of water in Hashem’s hand; whichever way He wishes He will turn it,” or as more commonly paraphrased, “Lev melachim v’sarim b’yad Hashem,” the heart of kings and powerful administrators is in the hand of Hashem. As people of faith, we believe that Hashem controls the world and determines the outcome of world politics and policy. We put in our effort to elect the right people, advocate for the Jewish community, and hope for the best, but then the rest is in Hashem’s hands.

We should continue to strengthen our faith in Hashem, and pray for peace and safety –h and may we merit to seeing the arrival of Moshiach very soon in our days.

Rebbetzin Sara Hopkovitz is the rebbetzin of the Young Israel of Hewlett.

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HAFTR Celebrates Chanukah

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AFTR was filled with light, joy, and spirited celebration as our community came together for a meaningful and memorable Chanukah across every division of the school.

Our Early Childhood Chanukah parties were a true delight, brimming with creativity and warmth. Families joined their children in hands-on projects such as menorah-making and decorating latke plates, while singing beloved Chanukah melodies together. The celebrations were highlighted by a glowing Pre-K performance that radiated musical cheer and filled the room with pride and simcha.

Throughout the Lower School, stu-

dents in Grades 1 through 5 brought Chanukah to life through engaging chagigot and festive activities. Kindergarten students charmed audiences with sing-alongs and reenactments, while Drum Tales performances and a spirited divisional Hallel energized the halls. Members of the Choir Club shared the joy of Chanukah beyond our walls by performing for senior citizens at the Levi Yitzchak Library.

Middle School students embraced the spirit of the chag through a week of themed celebrations, culminating in an exciting Color War—one of the highlights of the year. In a special expression of community, students also celebrated

Chanukah in the homes of their rabbeim, morot, and teachers, spreading the warmth of the holiday throughout the HAFTR family. Our eighth grade boys further extended this spirit through their Chanukah visit to Kulanu.

The High School marked Chanukah with a series of engaging activities, including a latke cook-off, a Chanukah trivia contest, and meaningful Chanukah gatherings with their rebbeim and morot, creating moments of connection that will last a lifetime.

Enhancing the joy across divisions were school-wide Chanukah concerts featuring Mendy Worch, generously

sponsored by the PTA, which brought students together in song, dance, and shared celebration. Our youngest learners enjoyed a special concert of their own with Rabbi Ben, filling their classrooms with music, ruach, and simcha.

One of the most moving moments of the season was HAFTR’s annual schoolwide Menorah lighting ceremony. As the candles were lit, their glow united our entire community in a powerful and meaningful expression of shared identity, faith, and light.

Chanukah at HAFTR was a reflection of the warmth, unity, and spirit that define our school community.

Students also showcased their creativity in the much-anticipated Menorah Palooza competition. Each child designed a unique menorah using a wide variety of materials. The imaginative chanukiot included creations made from recycled beverage bottles and food containers, round tzedakah boxes, mini gumball machines, and even themed menorahs inspired by movies and shows. All of the menorahs were displayed in the school atrium, and students voted for their favorites at the end of the week.

The weekly Shabbat Assembly was transformed into a dazzling “Light Up the Night Chagiga.” Held in a darkened room decorated with glow-in-the-dark décor, the celebration featured lively singing

and dancing set to music provided by HANC’s very own seventh-grade DJ, Leo Cohn. Wearing glow stick necklaces and bracelets, the children truly lit up the room as they joyfully welcomed the Shabbat of Chanukah.

The festivities concluded with a special visit from Digital Dov, who entertained students with Chanukah-themed challenges, trivia, and Minute-to-Win-It games. By week’s end, it was clear that Chanukah at HANC had been a vibrant, meaningful, and thoroughly enjoyable experience for all.

HANC extends its heartfelt thanks to the PTA for their generous support in making the Chanukah programs such a tremendous success.

Chanukah at HANC

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t was an action-packed and joy-filled week at HANC’s Reinstein Family Campus in West Hempstead, as students took part in a wide array of activities that brought energy, meaning, and excitement to their Chanukah celebrations.

Even before Chanukah officially began, HANC’s third graders embraced the spirit of giving by decorating lively dreidels. These creations were laminated and donated to the Five Towns Premiere Nursing and Rehabilitation Center, helping spread the joy and light of Chanukah to residents who were unable to celebrate the holiday at home with their families.

As Chanukah week got underway, each grade level enjoyed thoughtfully planned activities coordinated by HANC’s indefatigable Special Activities Coordinator, Mrs. Daniella Hirt. On Tuesday, the Elementary Division traveled to SanDee Lanes in Malverne, where students enjoyed bowling with their friends while building camaraderie and school spirit.

Throughout the week, classrooms were filled with Chanukah-themed learning experiences that deepened students’ understanding of the holiday.

On Wednesday, the school’s B’not

Sherut, Renana and Maayan, designed and led an engaging Chanukah Escape Room, challenging students to work collaboratively and think critically as they used their Chanukah knowledge to solve clues and “escape” the room. That same day, HANC’s Kindergarten students delighted parents and grandparents with a magnificent Chanukah play. Wearing Chanukah crowns and glittering flame and dreidel shields, the children sang and danced with enthusiasm, bringing great nachat to their families and teachers alike.

The celebration continued on Thursday with delicious sufganiyot, generously donated by the HANC PTA. Students had a wonderful time decorating their doughnuts with icing, candy, sprinkles, and mini marshmallows, adding extra sweetness to an already joyous week.

Adding a musical dimension to the festivities, each day of Chanukah featured a vote for the Greatest Chanukah Song of All Time. Classes watched the daily Maccabee Madness videos and cast their votes. By the final day, the competition was narrowed to two songs, and students proudly selected “Miracle of Light” by 8th Day as the overall winner.

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The Inner Calm Project Introduces Somatic Wellness Program for Girls

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magine an eight-week journey where girls drum together, feeling the beat in their hands and bodies, stretch and move through yoga with giggles and sighs of relief, and slow their breathing until shoulders drop and faces soften.

Some days burst with color as art spills onto paper, scissors snip, glue sticks, and vision boards take shape, filled with dreams, courage, and a growing sense of possibility. Other days end in a sound bath, where gentle tones ripple through the room and everything settles into quiet. Throughout every gathering, conscious connecting is woven in, creating moments of shared laughter, presence, and calm. This is the heart of The Inner Calm Project.

The Inner Calm Project is an eightweek, female-led somatic wellness program for girls that brings together body-based practices designed to make emotional regulation feel accessible, engaging, and real.

Each week introduces a different offering, including breathwork, yoga and creative movement, art expression, rhythm and drumming, sound healing, and mindset and vision board work. Together, these experiences form a grounding, playful rhythm

that helps girls discover what brings them calm, confidence, and connection.

Behind the experience is neuroscience.

The program is grounded in nervous system education, recognizing that emotional regulation is learned not only through words, but through the body. When the nervous system feels safe, emotions become more manageable, focus improves, and confidence grows. Inner Calm translates this science into experiences girls can feel and carry with them beyond the sessions.

The Inner Calm Project welcomes girls exactly where they are. Designed for every girl, the program honors a wide range of temperaments and personalities. Some girls arrive full of energy, others quieter and more reflective. There is no pressure to perform, share, or change. Participation is invitational, allowing each girl to engage in ways that feel authentic and comfortable.

The program was founded and is clinically directed by Jennifer Mann, LCSW, a licensed clinical social worker who works at Bnos Malka Academy and maintains a private practice in Cedarhurst. She is joined by an experienced, all-female facilitation team selected for both professional expertise and warmth.

The Inner Calm Facilitation Team

The Inner Calm Project is led by a multidisciplinary team whose work blends clinical insight with creativity, play, and presence.

Chava Rabinowitz guides gentle, body-based breathwork practices that support nervous system regulation and a sense of inner safety.

Rachel Frei brings over 20 years of experience as a certified yoga instructor and somatic-informed movement educator, guiding yoga and creative movement that invite strength, ease, and embodiment.

Arielle Chava Taitz, ATR-BC, LCAT, a board-certified clinical art therapist with more than 18 years of experience, facilitates art expression through drawing, painting, collage, and mixed media to support emotional expression and regulation.

Bitya Bella, a massage therapist and Internal Family Systems practitioner, leads rhythm-based drum circles and movement experiences that foster grounding, joy, and connection through shared rhythm.

Chasi Nitekman, a certified Lev Emunah facilitator and mindset coach, leads vision board and mindset workshops that help girls imagine possibilities, identify strengths, and gently challenge limiting beliefs.

Rita Thomas offers sound baths using crystal singing bowls and soothing tones, creating opportunities for deep rest and nervous system regulation.

Girls also receive Inner Calm keepsakes and program goodies, including a personalized yoga mat, so the sense of care and calm extends beyond each session and into daily life.

The Inner Calm Project is not therapy, but a preventative, skill-building wellness offering. Groups are age-based and intentionally small to support safety, connection, and meaningful relationships.

Meet the Facilitators Parents are invited to a Zoom Open House on Tuesday, December 30 at 9:00 PM, where they will meet the Inner Calm facilitation team, experience brief mini-sessions, and learn more about the program. To receive the Zoom link, please email jennifermannlcsw@gmail.com.

Additional information is available through the program’s information link and on Instagram at @the_innercalmproject. Due to overwhelming interest, a women’s Inner Calm group is currently forming, and Inner Calm for boys is coming soon. We can’t wait to welcome you to the Inner Calm community.

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Rav Simcha Kook

By Gedalia Guttentag

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teachable moment took place in the Negev Desert which showed how Rav Simcha stood for principles of basic emunah, even in uncomfortable situations.

Every year, the high school would take the students camping and hiking in the desert’s famous craters — trips that the Rosh Yeshivah naturally led.

One time, the group was met by a secular tour guide from the nearby Sde Boker field school. The man began to explain to the teens about the unique topographical formations in the area and referred to the world as being millions of years old.

R’ Simcha wasn’t deterred: He respectfully yet emphatically informed the guide about the Torah’s definitive view on the age of the universe. The man took it all in and then smiled, indicating that he wasn’t ruffled by the exchange.

But the Rosh Yeshivah didn’t leave things there. The next day after Shacharis, while still wearing his tallis and tefillin, he had an announcement for his students:

“The world sees a contradiction between the Torah and the scientific theories about the age of the world,” he said. “There is no contradiction — and a few approaches to reconcile the two have been propounded by gedolei Yisrael throughout the ages. Each morning after Shacharis I’m going to share one approach.”

For the next three days, the mountain vistas of the Negev witnessed a surreal scene: The entire student body sat in the sand wearing their tefillin after Shacharis and listened to the Rosh Yeshivah expound with passion about the Torah’s truth.

Looking around at the Negev’s vast emptiness, he said, “Who knows how long these hills have waited since the last time they heard Torah?”

At the end of the trip, with the lessons about unapologetic Jewish belief firmly instilled in his boys, R’ Simcha turned to the secular guide and expressed his gratitude: “We have to thank you — you taught us to love the desert and its wild beauty, and we taught ourselves to see the splendor of Creation with perfect faith.”

If R’ Simcha had a love for the rolling

landscapes and holiness of the whole of Eretz Yisrael, that feeling was magnified when it came to the city of his birth. His emotional attachment to Yerushalayim left a deep impression on his young charges.

Every year, in the days before Yom Kippur, the students would go for a pre-dawn trip for Selichos at the Kosel. Bleary-eyed, they would load benches from the yeshivah onto a truck. R’ Simcha would oversee the preparations. Overhearing one student talking about the imminent “tiyul to Yerushalayim” he corrected him. This was no mere outing, the Rosh Yeshivah said, but a veritable “aliyah l’regel” to pour out one’s heart amid longing for the Beis HaMikdash.

When the group came to Shaar HaAshpos, a few hundred meters from the Kosel, they would gather around the Rosh Yeshivah, and he would speak about the Beis HaMikdash and about the holy city in which he grew up. He would conjure up before their eyes a vision of the vanished city of his youth, of his grandfather and pious Jews like him who had toiled to build the modern city. He would tell of the tzaddikim he saw in his youth, and end with a cry: “Let’s ascend to Tzion, to the House of Hashem!”

Fired up, the boys would daven Selichos and Shacharis, and end by dancing in circles to the tune of “V’sechezenah eineinu b’shuvcha l’Tzion b’rachamim.”

On Rosh Hashanah and Yom Kippur, those lessons took center stage at the yeshivah as R’ Simcha conveyed longing for the Beis HaMikdash through teaching, and when davening at the amud.

On Yom Kippur night, he would describe in detail the Service of the Kohen Gadol on that holy day and go through the piyutim that would be recited the next day.

R’ Simcha himself led most of the tefillos. A powerful baal tefillah, his effect lay in the fact that he was transported by the words to another realm. As many were to comment throughout his life, R’ Simcha seemed to spend Yom Kippur in the Beis HaMikdash, performing the Avodah. “It felt like we were being led by the Kohen Gadol himself,” remembers Yaakov Wissotzky.

Near the yeshivah was Moshav Nordia, a secular agricultural village whose fields the beis midrash overlooked. One Shabbos morning in the middle of Shacharis, the pastoral quiet was disturbed by an unwelcome noise: the sound of a tractor as a farmer tilled the soil.

A few students went out to remonstrate

and explain that he was disturbing the sanctity of the Shabbos next door, but he refused to stop. Then R’ Simcha himself got involved.

Majestic in his tallis and flanked by a group of boys in their Shabbos finery, he headed out and greeted the farmer. With great emotion he spoke about the importance of Shabbos and its role in safeguarding Eretz Yisrael. Lo and behold, the man agreed to stop.

After Shabbos, R’ Simcha sent a letter to the neighboring moshav urging that the residents uphold the holiness of Shabbos, and the moshav secretary hung it on the communal notice board, where it remained for a long time.

But the story didn’t end there. Yaakov Wissotzky, who witnessed the exchange, followed up with the farmer. The man told him that he’d almost become a baal teshuvah as a result of the encounter in the fields.

“I was operating the tractor when I saw an unusual sight,” the farmer recalled. “The tall, imposing rabbi came out and started to speak to me about the holiness of the day.

His appearance and the way he talked about the elevation of Shabbat overcame me, and so I stopped working.”

For a while, R’ Simcha and the farmer stayed in touch and discussed Judaism, but the connection petered out.

“I cut off the connection,” the farmer said, “because I felt that if it would continue then I would be unable to withstand the force of the Rav’s truths and I would have to change my whole lifestyle — something that I felt unable to do.”

Reprinted from Rav Simcha Kook by Gedalia Guttentag, with permission from the copyright holder, ArtScroll Mesorah Publications.

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1. *

TJH

Centerfold

The Person You Become When You Buy a Lottery Ticket The Statistician — Says, “The odds are terrible,” then buys

The Minimalist — Says, “Money won’t change me,” then

a ticket anyway.

spends two days looking at mansions on Zillow.

The Optimist — Sincerely believes that he is going to win.

The Googler — Says, “I’ll deal with it if it happens,” then

Dude…check out the odds!

googles “stay anonymous after winning lottery.”

The Responsible Adult — Says, “I’ll invest most

The Skeptic — Says, “I never win.” So

of it,” then mentally spends all of it.

why don’t you give away the ticket?

The Secret Keeper — Says, “I won’t tell anyone”

The Storyteller — Says, “I wouldn’t

and is all proud of his discipline. Ugh…you

make a big deal,” then rehearses the

didn’t win yet!

story in preparation for his 16 podcast appearances.

The Quitter — Says, “I’d keep working,” then spends the next 48 hours thinking about

The Panicker — Knows that as soon as he

how he is going to quit.

wins, he is going to think that he is having a heart attack.

The Philanthropist — Already has lists of organizations that he is going to help. (Now add another 547 that will

The Philosopher — Says, “Money doesn’t buy happiness”

come knocking at your door.)

but is willing to be the guinea pig.

You Gotta Be Kidding Me! John: I always wanted to win the lottery, like my father.

Bob: Your father won the lottery?!

John: No, but he wanted to.

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1. What are the odds of winning the Powerball jackpot? a. 1 in 88 million b. 1 in 292.2 million c. 1 in 500 million d. 1 in 760 million 2. In 2011, how much did 20 coworkers at Costco of Melville, NY, win in the Powerball lotto? a. $11 million b. $41 million c. $87 million d. $202 million 3. Edwin Castro of L.A. won the biggest lotto ever in 2022. How much did he win? a. $489 million b. $1.2 billion c. $2.2 billion d. $6 billion 4. According to a study by Time Magazine, what percentage of lottery winners experience serious financial trouble within a few years? a. 7% b. 30% c. 60% d. 82% 5. According to the National Endowment for Financial Education, what is the most common mistake financial experts say lottery winners make? a. Quitting their job b. Buying luxury items too quickly c. Telling too many people d. Taking the lump sum

6. Jack Whittaker won a $315 million Powerball in 2007. What did he say shortly before he died? a. “I wish I’d torn that ticket up.” b. “I had blessings before the lotto.

I just saw it more after.” c. “The best money spent was on charity.” d. “That was a good ride… That was a good ride.”

7. In 2005, a record 110 players won $500,000 and $100,000 prizes in the Powerball drawing, even though statistically there should have only been 4-5 winners. What happened? a. A psychic went on local TV and said what the numbers would be, and a lot of people listened to her. b. A fortune cookie that was mass produced had the winning numbers c. The group of 110 people always purchased the same numbers and finally hit. d. The number was accidentally released 30 seconds early, and people who were watching TV quickly purchased that number.

Answer Key: 1) B: That means that your odds are about the same to win the lotto as they are to get a green light when you approach Rockaway Turnpike on Central Ave. 2) D: CENTERFOLD HACK: I do my returns at the Costco in Melville because many of the winners worked

at the returns desk and many kept their jobs. No joke — if you go there, you will see for yourself that they seem to be a very happy, laidback and easygoing group. They never question why I’m returning a halfeaten cantaloupe. That’s a joke, I don’t do that, but they generally are really cool.

(Very busy Costco, though … ac t ually the busiest in the country.

Pretty crazy that once I start talking about Costco, I can go on forever. I do love the new 9AM thing…. it’s great! OK, back to real life…)

3) C: Supposedly this L.A. dude had the ticket for weeks before realizing that he won. Dude, where’s my car?

4) B: That’s less than I would expect.

5) C: I didn’t tell anyone when I won.

6) A: This poor guy ended up with an alcohol problem, he got divorced, his house burnt down, he lost a grandchild to an overdose, and he ended up broke.

7) B: Respect the fortune cookie!

Way to go Cho-Sen Island!

Wisdom Key: 5-7 correct: You know a lot about the lotto. Don’t quit your job yet, though.

2-4 correct: You are mediocre, like a boring $67 million lotto….Yeah, I said it…six…seven!

0-1 correct: You are too smart to play the lotto. Instead, you live with no dreams!

DECEMBER 25, 2025 | The Jewish Home

Lotto Trivia

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The Jewish Home | DECEMBER 25, 2025

Voice N

tes

To Tell the Truth, Snowflakes Are Falling

By Rabbi Yehuda Deutsch

PHoT o cR EdIT

MI RI AM PA Sc AL

coHE N

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he imagery of a snowflake is evocative. Each one is unique and special, and noticing that uniqueness takes time and patience. The reward, though, is exquisite. Lacy and delicate, their beauty is subtle.

Still, when we use the term snowflakes to describe people, we’re not paying anyone a compliment. The phrase took off around 2015 as millennials entered the workforce. It described a group that couldn’t handle feedback or criticism without melting.

Fast-forward ten years, and the forecast is looking worse. Snowflakes seem to be falling even heavier.

Parents have embraced the same mindset, showing a growing unwillingness to hear or accept feedback about their children. And lately there’s been another shift as the snowflake storm grows stronger—this time, the snowflakes are falling literally.

A friend of mine, a fellow educator, recently reached out. His son learns in a local yeshiva, and he contacted the rebbe to discuss the boy’s progress. He knew his child was struggling and wanted to help. The rebbe told him the child was doing beautifully. When my friend pushed back and said that his son didn’t seem to know the material well when they reviewed homework together, the rebbe repeated, “No, he’s doing wonderfully.” My friend asked me: Is the rebbe lying to me, or does he not know what’s going on with my child? Neither answer is acceptable.

A local principal told me recently that “PTA is only for sharing nachas.” But if report cards are only for nachas, and PTA conferences are only for nachas, when is a parent supposed to hear how their child is actually doing? The truth may be that some parents don’t want to hear it. They want to be happy. They want to feel good.

They want to hear what they want to hear.

Looking ahead, as AI intersects with

social media, there are predictions that people’s feeds will be curated entirely to their liking. The ability to hear anything uncomfortable is shrinking to a worrying degree. Yes, previous generations had plenty to improve on.

In those days, a child might get a big red F—and just to drive the point home, it might be circled in red so no one could miss it. Thankfully, we’ve moved away

dress an issue in his kehilla, and it wasn’t pleasant. He feared that giving the mussar might cost him his job. Rav Shach told him gently that everything can be said; it’s just a matter of how it’s said.

If that’s true, and I believe it is, then not saying something at all is its own kind of failure.

We are doing children a serious disservice when we promote them year after

We are doing children a serious disservice when we promote them year after year without addressing their weaknesses.

from that. But the pendulum isn’t slowing down. It’s now swinging too far the other way.

A young rabbi once approached Rav Shach with a dilemma. He needed to ad-

year without addressing their weaknesses. Even when a school provides services and support internally, if the parents aren’t made aware of the struggle, it’s irresponsible and undermines the digni-

ty of education. At the same time, parents and children need to be willing to receive feedback. Many educators today feel the field is no longer worth entering because of how quickly some parents defend behavior and push back against any concern.

If a rebbe, morah, or teacher tells a parent that their child is struggling, be it academically, socially, or behaviorally, and the parent responds by blaming the school, the teacher, or anyone else, it’s easy for an educator to think, Why bother? Nothing will come of this anyway. And I understand that. Both sides need a path forward. Parents need to be ready to hear and address concerns, and teachers need to share feedback calmly, clearly, and with empathy and with positivity, an eye to a brighter future and a better tomorrow for the child and his or her educational journey.

Still, I believe the responsibility to report remains with the school.

Even a picky eater deserves to be offered food. Whether they eat is up to them, but offering it should be non-negotiable. You can lead a horse to water, but we still have to lead it.

Today’s chinuch world has seen a genuine renaissance. The dedication, training, and talent of our educators surpass much of the classroom experience from previous generations. But that makes it even more important to say what needs to be said. Whether parents agree, push back, or disregard it doesn’t absolve us of our responsibility. If we shrink from this duty, we become part of the problem.

The snowflakes will keep falling—until, eventually, they pile into an avalanche we won’t be able to manage.

Having previously been a rebbi and principal, Rabbi Yehuda Deutsch, M.Ed., is currently the Assistant Dean at Torah Academy for Girls in Far Rockaway.

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The Jewish Home | DECEMBER 25, 2025

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Torah Thought

DECEMBER 25, 2025 | The Jewish Home

Parshas Vayigash

By Rabbi Berel Wein z”l

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here is no fight as bitter as a family fight. The bitterness and scars remain long after the incident that may have originally sparked it is long since gone and sometimes even forgotten. Many times, the bitterness and hard feelings remain even in generations of descendants of the original antagonists, as though somehow genetically transmitted.

Yosef and his brothers reconcile in this week’s parsha. But the divisions within the Jewish people then and now are apparently never really healed and forgotten. The commentators point out that the rebellions against Moshe in the desert, that of Korach of the tribe of Levi and Zimri of the tribe of Shimon, and Datan and Aviram of the tribe of Reuven are all part of the residue – of the fallout of the tragedy of the disagreement of Yosef and his brothers.

So, too, is the tragedy of the splitting of the Jewish people living in the Land of Israel into two disparate and even warring kingdoms after the death of King Shlomo. In fact, the later com-

mentators opine that all later controversies in Jewish life are but an echo of this original controversy between Yosef and his brothers.

The fact that Yaakov in his final words to Shimon and Levi recalls this dispute and its consequences to them only serves to continue the pain and bad feelings that were papered over

Such is unfortunately the way in family disputes. That is why one must go to all lengths to prevent such disputes, no matter what or how large the seeming cause may be.

Part of the problem, in my opinion, is that in the dispute with Yosef and the brothers, one side, Yosef, was eventually right and the other side – the broth-

All later controversies in Jewish life are but an echo of this original controversy between Yosef and his brothers.

when Yaakov came down to Egypt. But now that he is gone, the brothers and Yosef remain wary of each other, with the memories of their dispute irrevocably burned into their psyches.

ers – seemingly wrong and guilty. This feeling of guilt and being proven wrong only provokes a greater defensive attitude and a determination not to abandon the blind self-justification that led

originally to the divisive incident itself.

Contrast this with the disagreements of Beit Shammai and Beit Hillel, numerous and contentious (312 of them) as they were, that never led to any sort of breakup within the society of Israel. There, both sides were right, even though as a practical matter, the opinions of Beit Hillel were in the main followed in halachic practice. The Talmud proclaimed that the opinions of both groups were “the words of the living G-d.” By avoiding unnecessary condemnation of Beit Shammai, even though its opinions were not to be adopted and practically implemented, the Talmud guaranteed the harmony of the rabbis and of Jewish society.

Within the framework of halacha and tradition, there are many varying opinions. Not all of them can be given equal weight and followed, but none of them should be the basis of personal dispute and vilification. The lessons of Yosef and his brothers and their controversy should remain for us as a guide in our times and difficulties as well.

Shabbat shalom.

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The Jewish Home | DECEMBER 25, 2025

From the Fire Parshas Vayigash

Protect the Candle, Then Light a Bonfire

By Rav Moshe Weinberger Adapted for publication by Binyomin Wolf

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hazal (Yalkut Shimoni 150) connect the confrontation between Yehuda and Yosef at the beginning of the parsha to a pasuk in Tehillim (48:25) we read every Monday morning in the Song of the Day: “Hashem is great and very much praised in the city of our G-d, the mountain of His holiness. A beautiful view, joy of the entire world, the mountain of Zion…for behold the kings have assembled; they have passed together.”

When Dovid Hamelech said, “The kings have assembled,” the Midrash says that this refers to none other than Yehuda and Yosef. Yehuda was the king of the brothers, and Yosef was the king of Egypt. Why does the Midrash connect this encounter with Dovid Hamelech’s description of

the beauty of Yerushalayim, the Temple Mount, and the Beis Hamikdash?

We see from the Mishna in Pirkei Avos (2:1) that there are two types of tzaddikim, two ways of serving Hashem.

The Mishna says, “Rebbi says, ‘Which is the straight path which a person should choose? Any one which gives glory to the one who does it and glory from other people.’” In other words, there are two paths, both of which appear good and straight, so it is difficult to choose between them.

But Rebbi advises that one should choose the path that not only gives himself glory but also causes others to give him glory.

One type of tzaddik serves Hashem to perfect himself and get closer to Hashem, but he does not involve himself in teach-

ing or attempting to influence others. This type of tzaddik includes the thirty-six hidden tzaddikim. Such a tzaddik follows the path which “gives glory to the one who does it.” While service of G-d in this way certainly affects the world through its influence on the higher worlds, a tzaddik who follows this path secludes himself and does not attempt to influence others.

This is the way of private, secluded service of G-d.

But there is another type of tzaddik, one who follows a path that “gives glory to the one who does it and glory from other people.” Tzaddikim who serve Hashem in this way work to bring G-d’s glory not only into their own lives but also into the lives of everyone around them. This is

the way of public service of G-d. Both of these types of tzaddikim have their place.

The pasuk (Tehillilm 96:11) says, “The Heavens will rejoice, and the earth will delight.” In other words, “the Heavens will rejoice” as a result of those tzaddikim who seclude themselves to serve G-d in a state of total purity. And “the earth will delight” through the service of those tzaddikim who serve G-d by teaching and influencing their brothers and sisters here on earth. Both paths are precious before Hashem. Both have their proper time and place.

Yaakov Avinu himself struggled to find his place between these two paths.

He dreamed (Bereishis 28:12) of a “ladder set up on the ground and its top reached

fulfilled the mitzvah to light the menorah “outside.” But today, the outside world is now inside. Every type of distraction and impurity rides into our homes through the same devices found in the outside world. Because the world out there is now in our homes, we fulfill the mitzvah to light the menorah outside by lighting it in our houses. And by doing so, we daven to Hashem that He illuminate our houses with the light of His Torah so that our homes will have the sanctity and wholesomeness that does not exist outside.

What was the nature of this meeting between the two kings? How does it relate to these two ways of serving G-d, and how does it connect to the beauty of the Temple Mount and Yerushalayim?

Their debate was about their brother Binyomin. And we know that the Beis Hamikdash and the Holy of Holies were

severe that were it possible for it to fall on Shabbos, we would still fast. On the 8th of Teves, Talmai Hamelech decreed that the sages translate the Torah into Greek. This was considered a horrible degradation of the Torah. While it is true that this would theoretically a good thing because “the beauty of G-d goes to Yefes [the father of Greece] and it shall dwell in the tents [houses of study] of Shem [the father of the Jewish people]” (Bereishis 9:27), it could not have come at a worse time. The walls of the Jewish community were down, and many Jewish people were becoming mesmerized with Greek culture. Translating the Torah meant strengthening Hellenists’ penchant for viewing the holy Torah as merely another topic for intellectual study.

The 9th of Teves is the yahrtzeit of Ezra Hasofer, who caused the Assyrian

We must light the menorah in our homes in exile before we can light it outside with the redemption.

situated on both Binyomin and Yehuda’s portions of Eretz Yisroel (Zevachim 53b-54a). In other words, their debate was about the soul of the Jewish nation, the Beis Hamikdash. Which of their paths in the service of G-d represent the pinnacle of man’s service?

Yehuda’s way of redemption, of public teaching and influence, or Yosef’s way of exile, of secluding one’s self from the world to serve G-d in purity? Yehuda’s path of “a beautiful view, joy of the entire world” and “the earth will delight?” Or Yosef’s path of “let the Heavens rejoice”?

Yehuda argued that, just like in the time of the redemption, “Yerushalayim will be settled like unwalled towns” (Zecharia 2:8). When we live in the proper way, we will no longer need the high walls of Yerushalayim to keep the outside world out. Instead, the light of Yerushalayim will be open, illuminating the entire world. What is the appropriate time for each of these approaches?

Next week is the fast day of Asara B’Teves. According to Shulchan Aruch (Orach Chaim 580 and Magen Avraham there), Asara B’Teves is one of the most terrible fast days because it was instituted after tragedies which befell our people on the 8th, 9th, and 10th of Teves. It is so

script we find in sifrei Torah to be used for seforim accessible to the general public. He brought the depth and richness of the Torah’s writing, in which the shape of every letter has significance and every crown on every letter teaches scores of halachos and secrets of Torah, to the Jewish world. Losing Ezra was a tragedy of untold proportions because he introduced a new depth of understanding to the Jewish people’s understanding of the inner, deeper part of Torah.

On Asara B’Teves, the 10th of Teves, the king of Bavel began the siege on Yerushalayim at the time of the first Beis Hamikdash.

These three things share one common denominator. All of them demonstrate how important the walls of holiness are to increasing the depth and purity of our connection to an understanding of the Torah.

The ultimate goal, the way of redemption and Eretz Yisroel, is to break down the walls and spread Torah to the whole world. That is the way of Yehuda, the father of Dovid Hamelech and Moshiach.

But that is only possible after we first protect the sanctity of our people and ourselves by sanctifying Hashem’s name in private, where no one in the world can see

us. That is the way of Yosef Hatzaddik, the father of Moshiach ben Yosef, who prepares the way for Moshiach ben Dovid.

We must light the menorah in our homes in exile before we can light it outside with the redemption.

It is told that Rav Chatzkel Shinover, the author of the Divrei Yechezkel, once had to travel with his gabbai on a very cold and windy night. The two of them were suffering tremendously from the cold so Rav Chatzkel asked his gabbai to make a fire for them. The gabbai took some flint stones and tried mightily, but he was unsuccessful. So the rebbe asked if he could try, and when he did so, a fire started immediately.

Rav Chatzkel then told his gabbai, “I know when we get back, you’re going to tell all of the chassidim that the rebbe did a miracle. But you should know that it isn’t true. But Rav Hirsch Riminover… he could do wonders. Once, on Shabbos, there was a large storm outside the beis midrash, and one of the windows shattered. The wind was howling through the window, and the chassidim wanted to go find a non-Jew to put something over the window, lest the wind blow out the candles in the beis midrash. But Rav Mendel looked out of the window this way and that way, and told them that the candles would be fine. Just then, the wind stopped blowing through the window. So you see, Rav Hirsch Riminover could do wonders, but I cannot. All I know how to do is to cup my hands over the spark to allow the flame to grow.”

The tzaddikim of the earlier generations miraculously protected us from the winds of the outside world. But today, our job is to cup our hands around the fire of our Yiddishkeit and not to let it go out. We must protect the holiness of our minds, our eyes, and our ears from the impurity of the outside world. And we must fill them with Torah, tefillah, mitzvos, and words and acts of kindness. If we first protect the candle, we can use it to light a bonfire.

With G-d’s help, may we protect the holiness within us so that the Heavens will rejoice and the path will be prepared for the way of Yehuda and Moshiach ben Dovid, who will bring about the time when “the earth will delight,” may it come soon in our days.

Rav Moshe Weinberger, shlita, is the founding Morah d’Asrah of Congreagation Aish Kodesh in Woodmere, NY, and serves as leader of the new mechina Emek HaMelech.

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to Heaven.” On one hand, his grandfather Avraham Avinu was devoted to the path “which gives glory to the one who does it and glory from other people.” Avraham went out into the world to bring all of mankind to belief in and service of G-d.

And his father Yitzchak separated himself from the world, devoted to a path in which he did not travel to teach others about G-d but stayed in Eretz Yisroel and worked to perfect himself. Yaakov Avinu felt drawn to both paths and attempted to find a middle ground.

We see which path Yosef and Yehuda chose based on the Gemara (Sota 36b), which says, “Yosef sanctified the name of Heaven in private, so one letter of Hashem’s name was added to his name.

Yehuda, who sanctified the name of Heaven in public, has all the letters of Hashem’s name in his name.” Yosef sanctified Hashem’s name in private by refusing to be with the wife of Potifar when no one was there to see. But Yehuda sanctified G-d’s name publicly by proclaiming, in front of everyone, “She is more righteous than me” about Tamar. Similarly, the pasuk which refers to the greatness of those tzaddikim who give glory to Heaven and increase G-d’s glory on earth also contains Hashem’s four letter name: “Yismichu ha’shamayim v’sagel ha’eretz, The Heavens will rejoice and the earth will delight.”

Rav Kook explains in Ein Aya (on Shabbos 21b) a deeper way of understanding the Gemara’s teaching: “It is a mitzvah to light the Chanukah candle by the door of the house on the outside… But at a time of danger, one may place it on his table, and that is sufficient.” Rav Kook explains that at one time, when we had a Beis Hamikdash and had experienced the redemption of Chanukah, we placed the menorah on the outside of the house to illuminate the outside world with the light of Torah and holiness. That is the way of Yehuda. But in a time of exile, when the dangers of the outside world’s influences press on our homes, attempting to come inside, we lock our doors, close our shades, and concentrate on keeping the pure light of holiness burning inside. We do not attempt to influence the outside world in exile because we have a difficult enough time keeping the influences of the non-Jewish world out. That is the way of serving G-d in exile. That is the way of Yosef Hatzaddik.

The Sfas Emes uses this Gemara to illustrate a very similar teaching. In the old days, there was a separation between the nations of the world and the protected holiness of a Jewish home. Then, we

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Think. Feel.Grow.

Your Creation Story The Journey of Self-Discovery

By Rabbi Shmuel Reichman

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ichelangelo was once asked, “How is it that you create such wondrous sculptures and works of art? How can something so innovative and ingenious emanate from mere mortal hands?”

Without skipping a beat, Michelangelo responded, “Before I even begin my work, the sculpture is already complete within the marble block. My job is simply to discover it and then chisel away the superfluous material.”

The dormant potential already exists beneath the surface; the job of the artist is simply to discover that which is hidden within and then transform the concealed into the revealed.

Your Creation Story Like Adam, each of us has our own unique creation story. The Gemara discusses the enigmatic events surrounding our formation, the initial stage of our own creation story (Niddah 30b).

The Gemara explains that when you

were just a fetus, you were in a perfect and transcendent state of being; a malach taught you kol haTorah kulah, and you experienced the entirety of reality with a crystal-clear lens. However, the Gemara continues with an anti-climactic punch (literally): just before you were born, this malach struck you on the mouth, causing you to forget everything you learned.

Two obvious questions arise: • Why does the malach make you forget what you’ve learned?

• And more importantly, if the malach is going to cause you to forget it, why even teach it to you in the first place?

The Vilna Gaon answers as follows: When the Gemara describes the fetus learning kol haTorah kulah, it isn’t referring to basic “Chumash with Rashi.”

Rather, this refers to the deepest realms of Torah — to a transcendent level of Torah that lies far beyond this world. This Torah is the very root of reality, and you were granted complete understanding

of its every detail. Not only were you shown this level of Torah, but you also learned your specific share of Torah; you were shown your unique purpose in the world and how your unique role fits into the larger scheme of the human story as a whole. You were given a taste of your own perfection, of what you could, should, and hopefully will become.

Most importantly, though, when the malach struck you, you didn’t lose this Torah; rather, you lost access to it.

Instead of disappearing, this knowledge and clarity became buried deep within your subconscious. The reason is as follows: What you received in the womb wasn’t real, it was merely a gift — something unearned and undeserved.

The goal of life is to come into this world and rebuild all that you experienced and understood while in the womb. However, this time, it will be real, because you will have to build it yourself. In essence, your job in this world is not to create yourself, but rather to recreate your-

self — to re-attain your original state of perfection, as you were shown by the malach. This time, however, it must be done through free will, by choosing to become great. Only by overcoming challenge and difficulty, only by asserting your willpower, can you fulfill your true potential. In essence, our entire life is a story of teshuvah, returning to our original, higher true self.

Learning or Expressing?

Perhaps this explains why we often feel a sense of recognition when we hear a deep thought or profound insight. Instead of feeling as though we are learning it for the first time, everything just “clicks,” almost as if we already knew the idea. This is because we do already know it. We’re not learning; we’re rediscovering what we already learned in the womb, what’s ingrained within us. The Torah is already there at a subconscious level; now we must invest the effort to build and express it in this world.

Understanding Our Yearnings This fundamental truth expresses itself within the concept of human desire.

As humans, we all have cravings and yearnings. However, these cravings tend to be limited to that which we have already experienced. For example, many people crave pizza, ice cream, steak, and other delicious foods. But this is only because we have tasted them before. I don’t know anyone who craves kosher bugs such as locust, even though in certain Asian countries, bugs are served as delicacies. This is because we only yearn for foods that we have tasted before. Think about this: do you crave any-

thing that you haven’t tasted before? Do you crave the remarkable cuisine called “yabagaloola”? Of course not, because it doesn’t exist, and we can only crave something that we have previously tasted. If so, why do we crave wisdom, greatness, significance, and perfection?

Because we have tasted it before — in the womb! We were all once in this perfect state, we tasted it, and now we crave to experience it once again.

Human Growth With this principle in mind, let us explore the process of human growth.

Many people grow from the outside in.

They look around at their friends, their family, and society, and then shape

our unique purpose, our unique tree to grow. Our job in this life is to take our seed and harness our potential. True happiness is when you are becoming you — when you are on the journey to becoming your true self, spending each day bringing out more and more of what you are meant to become.

True growth requires us to grow from the inside out. We need to go into a room, by ourselves, and ask the real questions: Who am I? What drives me?

What makes me unique? What are my talents? What are my passions? What can I contribute to the Jewish people and the world as a whole?

Instead of becoming a mirror, which reflects everything outside itself, we can

We can build something majestic and beautiful within ourselves and then express that outward into the world.

themselves to fit their surroundings.

The clothes they wear, the things they talk about, and their values and goals become a reflection of their external environment. In other words, many people feel like they are a slab of clay and mold themselves to fit into their environment, i.e., into the molds that society creates for them.

What if we realized that, much like Michelangelo’s sculptures, we, too, are already uniquely and perfectly formed beneath the surface. Our job in life isn’t to take a slab of stone and sculpt something beautiful; our job is to discover who we truly are, who we already are, and to then “chisel away the superfluous material” and express our inner self. Growth isn’t about becoming great, it’s about becoming you; learning isn’t about discovery, it’s about self-discovery. You are a masterpiece covered with stone; your job in this world is to uncover and express yourself, your true self.

This is why the Torah compares man to a tree (Devarim 20:19). An apple seed already contains all of its potential within it. It then spends its life expressing the potential that is latent within it.

You never hear an apple seed looking around and saying, “I want to be a pear tree!” As human beings, we, too, are created with all our potential invested within us. As a fetus, we were each given

become projectors. We can build something majestic and beautiful within ourselves and then express that outward into the world.

Living with Purpose After developing oneself, the next step toward greatness is contributing that uniqueness toward something greater than oneself — finding your “self” within a greater whole. This is why the greatest thinkers and talmidei chachamim are both fully loyal to the mesorah while simultaneously expressing their uniqueness and working to develop the mesorah further. This is the very essence of Torah She’baal Peh, the ability for human beings to express their unique Torah into the world, while still remaining faithful to the objective body of Torah She’bichsav. Torah She’bichsav doesn’t change from its original form as given by Hashem. Torah She’baal Peh, however, is in continuous development and is the medium in which human beings can become part of Torah.

Chazal tell us that when you leave this world, you will meet three malachim. One angel will ask you: “Where are your mitzvos?” The second angel will ask you: “Where are your aveiros?” The last angel will ask you: “Where is your Torah?” Although the first two questions make sense, the third one is puzzling.

After all, learning Torah is a mitzvah and should therefore be included within the first angel’s question. Why then is it a separate, unique question? The Vilna Gaon adds a chilling detail to this story: When you see this third malach, you will recognize him; he is the same malach who taught you kol haTorah kulah in the womb, who showed you your potential in this world. Now, he is here to greet you as you leave this world and to ask: “Where is your Torah? I gave it to you in the womb for free, but did you build it yourself? Did you make it your own? Did you fulfill your purpose in this world?”

When Avraham is instructed to leave his home and embark on his journey toward greatness, Hashem tells him two unforgettable words: “lech lecha — go for yourself.” Lecha can also be read as go “to yourself.” Avraham was commanded to embark on a journey to “himself” because the genuine journey of life is the journey to the self.

Let us each be inspired to bring our own Torah into the world and express our unique purpose.

Rabbi Shmuel Reichman is an international speaker, bestselling author, business coach, the CEO of SMA, and a TED Talk Speaker.

His online content reaches millions of people every month, and he lectures internationally on topics of Torah thought, psychology, leadership, and business – uniquely blending many areas of Torah and wisdom together. His bestselling book, The Journey to Your Ultimate Self, serves as an inspiring gateway into deeper Torah thought. After receiving his BA from Yeshiva University and Semicha from Yeshiva University’s RIETS, Rabbi Reichman received a Masters degree in Philosophy and Religion from the University of Chicago. As part of his Masters Degree at the University of Chicago, Rabbi Reichman received an Ivy Plus Scholarship to Harvard where he spent a year studying Religious Philosophy and Literature as an Ivy Scholar. Additionally, he received a Masters degree in Educational Psychology from Azrieli Graduate School and a Masters degree in Jewish Thought from Yeshiva University’s Bernard Revel Graduate School. As a business and leadership coach, Rabbi Reichman provides a unique 1-on-1 coaching program where he helps high-achievers, coaches, and business owners achieve their financial and personal goals. To learn more or to get in contact with Rabbi Reichman, visit his website: ShmuelReichman.com

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This explains an interesting Gemara (Megillah 6b), which says that if someone claims that he exerted himself in learning but has failed to acquire understanding, you should not believe him. Likewise, if he claims to have put no effort into his learning but has succeeded regardless, you should similarly not believe him. Only someone who says that he exerted himself in his learning and succeeded should be believed.

The Vilna Gaon raises a fascinating question: The wording of the Gemara is “yagati u’matzati,” understood to mean “I exerted myself and succeeded.” However, the word metziah doesn’t mean succeed, it means find! Shouldn’t the Gemara have used a word such as asisi, paalti, or hitzlachti, which refer to accomplishment or achievement? The Vilna Gaon explains this according to the aforementioned idea. Genuine learning isn’t about achieving something new, it’s about finding that which already exists within your subconscious, that which you learned while in the womb.

This same idea lies at the heart of the classic conceptual debate between the worldviews of Plato and John Locke.

Locke claimed that the human mind begins as a blank slate and that a human being is then imprinted upon and molded through everything he or she encounters and experiences throughout life. Plato, however, quoting Socrates, believed that everyone is born with the knowledge of everything embedded deep within. Therefore, the job of a teacher is not to impart novel information but to help the student come to understand on his own what he already knows deep within himself. The word “educate” comes from the Latin word which means to “take out” or “draw forth,” because teaching is the act of drawing out the dormant potential from within each student.

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Delving into the Daf

A Forced Tumah

By Rabbi Avrohom Sebrow

T

he Gemara (Zevachim 100a; see also Moed Katan 23a) and its commentators discuss various details of the following account, and some aspects are subject to interpretation. What follows is one possible dramatized reconstruction of the events.

The rabbi was softly reciting Tehillim at a well-attended funeral. The wife of a great sage had passed away, a tragedy made all the more painful by the young children she left behind. Yet there was something strikingly unusual about this levaya.

The nifteres lay beneath a small tent, surrounded by only a handful of people.

Everyone else stood at a distance. Was it possible that the thousands in attendance were all kohanim? Of course not. That day was the fourteenth of Nissan. All those present were obligated to offer the Korban Pesach that very afternoon and therefore could not become tamei. Only the members of the Chevra Kadisha had no choice but to incur tumah; they would bring their Korban Pesach a month later, on Pesach Sheini.

Still, there was something profoundly auspicious about the timing. Hashem had decreed that her funeral take place on that very day, allowing throngs of Jews, who had made the pilgrimage to Yerushalayim to bring the Korban Pesach, to attend and pay their respects, even if only from afar.

Suddenly, a commotion broke out.

Who would dare disrupt the levaya of such a revered rebbetzin? A group of men were pushing a screaming individual forward.

“No!” he pleaded. “I am a kohen! I am not permitted to go under the tent!”

They ignored him.

“Please,” he begged, “I must bring the Korban Pesach today!”

His cries were to no avail. They continued pushing him forward.

Then the crowd caught sight of the man and gasped. The men pushed him beneath the ohel, and one of them said, “Show some respect to your wife!”

The root of the disturbance had begun hours earlier.

The great scholar Yosef HaKohen sat

with his friends, crushed by grief. His wife had just passed away, and he was now an onen, one whose close relative has died and who is therefore prohibited from certain religious acts.

“With a broken heart,” he said quietly, “I will not be able to enter the ohel with my wife at the levaya. I am a kohen. The Chevra Kadisha will attend to the burial.”

His friends looked at him in astonishment.

“Yosef,” one of them said, “didn’t Chazal teach that burying one’s wife is comparable to burying a meis mitzvah, a person who has no one else to care for them? A meis mitzvah obligates everyone, even a Kohen Gadol. You are permitted, indeed obligated, to become tamei and attend to her burial.”

Yosef HaKohen shook his head.

“That statement, that a wife is like a meis mitzvah, was not meant literally,” he replied.

Another friend pressed him.

“Even if you are not obligated, surely you are at least permitted to stand beneath the same tent as the nifteres and attend the funeral properly. She is at the very least a close relative.”

“No,” Yosef answered firmly. “Today is the fourteenth of Nissan. I am obligated to bring the Korban Pesach this afternoon, as every Jew in Klal Yisrael is. I may not become tamei.”

One of them countered, “But you cannot bring the Korban Pesach. It is still morning, and you are an onen for the entire day. An onen is prohibited from offering any korbanos. Had your wife passed away after midday, your obligation in the Korban Pesach would already have taken effect before the prohibitions of aninus. But now, since you became an onen in the morning, you may not bring any korbanos today.”

Yosef replied without hesitation.

“I do not accept that ruling. I maintain that an onen is permitted to bring the Korban Pesach.”

His friends stepped aside and spoke among themselves in hushed tones.

“Yosef HaKohen is a towering gadol,” one of them said. “If he acts on this view, many will assume the halacha follows him.”

“But it does not,” another insisted. “The halacha is clear: an onen may not bring the Korban Pesach or any other korban.”

“So what do we do?” a third asked.

“How can we prevent him from bringing it?”

After a moment, one of them said quietly, “We must make him tamei.”

They hesitated.

“Are we even permitted to do such a thing?”

“Yes,” came the reply. “Rabbi Akiva recently taught that whenever a Kohen is permitted to become tamei in order to attend the levaya of a close relative, it is a mitzvah for him to do so. Tosafos explains that this extends so far that, where necessary, we may even compel him to fulfill that mitzvah.”

The decision was made.

And so, at the levaya of his own wife, Yosef HaKohen was forcibly brought beneath the ohel, against his will. Tumah was imposed upon him, and with it the certainty that he would bring the Korban Pesach not that day, but a month later, on Pesach Sheini.

At the Beis HaChaim, Yosef HaKohen encountered his wife’s sister. Seeing the young children left bereft of their mother and fearing for their future, he spoke to her with urgency and compassion. For the sake of the orphans, he asked that she agree

to marry him and take responsibility for them. She consented immediately.

The Gemara in Moed Katan (23a) relates that although this proposal took place on that very day, while Yosef HaKohen was still an onen, he acted with complete propriety. The Rishonim explain that the arrangement was made solely to ensure the children’s welfare; the actual chuppah was delayed until the appropriate time, after the periods of aninus and aveilus had passed. In this way, Yosef HaKohen demonstrated profound compassion, for even in the moment of his most significant personal loss, his thoughts were directed toward his children’s needs.

In this episode, Chazal reveal the true measure of greatness. Every step Yosef HaKohen took, whether resisted or compelled, was governed by an uncompromising loyalty to the will of Hashem. And yet, that same fidelity to halacha did not dull his sensitivity; it sharpened it. The very Torah that instilled ritual restraint also motivated him to show compassion and act quickly for his orphaned children, illustrating that genuine reverence for Hashem is intrinsically linked with empathy.

Rabbi Avrohom Sebrow is a rebbe at Yeshiva Ateres Shimon in Far Rockaway. In addition, Rabbi Sebrow leads a daf yomi chaburah at Eitz Chayim of Dogwood Park in West Hempstead, NY. He can be contacted at ASebrow@gmail.com.

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Headlines

Halacha

Kaddish for Krystina

By Rabbi Yair Hoffman

H

er code name was Christine Granville. The British called her “Churchill’s favorite spy.”

Vera Atkins of the SOE described her as “very brave, very attractive but a loner and a law unto herself.” Historian Alistair Horne called her “the bravest of the brave.”

But her real name was Maria Krystyna Janina Skarbek, born in Warsaw in 1908, to Count Jerzy Skarbek, a Roman Catholic nobleman, and, nebach, Countess Stefania, née Goldfeder—the daughter of a wealthy, assimilated Jewish banking family.

Stefania was the daughter of Adolf Goldfeder, a successful Warsaw banker who had transformed a modest bookkeeping firm into one of the city’s most prestigious financial institutions, reportedly using winnings from a lottery ticket as initial capital. The Goldfeders were part of a prosperous, highly assimilated Jewish elite that had largely severed itself from Torah observance. Stefania herself was raised without meaningful Jewish education or practice.

In 1898, under significant family pressure and financial inducement, Stefania married Count Skarbek. The marriage required her formal conversion to Roman Catholicism, a condition quietly facilitated through ecclesiastical channels after a substantial “donation” secured clerical approval. The wedding itself took place discreetly, in a secluded chapel reserved for the nobility—far from public scrutiny.

From a halachic standpoint, of course, such a conversion carried no validity. Stefania Goldfeder remained Jewish, and therefore so did her children.

She was raised entirely as a Catholic, educated in Catholic institutions, and lived her entire life seemingly unaware of her Jewish lineage. Her moth-

er, though wealthy and socially elevated, was deeply unhappy in her marriage and sought solace in European high society, particularly in Paris. Her father’s repeated absences further fractured the home.

Krystyna grew up in privilege but without stability—surrounded by status yet lacking rooted identity. She absorbed the values of courage, independence, and defiance from her environment but never had the opportunity to encounter Torah, mitzvos, or even the knowledge that she belonged to Klal Yisrael.

In halachic terms, she was the clearest possible example of a tinokes shenishba, a Jewish soul captured by circumstance, never given the chance to know who she truly was.

Which means, of course, that halachically, Krystyna Skarbek was Jewish.

She never knew it mattered. She was raised as a Roman Catholic, attended church, and lived her entire life unaware that, according to Torah law, she possessed a neshama that traced back to Har Sinai. She died on the evening of June 15, 1952—the 23rd of Sivan, 5712— stabbed to death in London by an obsessed suitor and is buried in St. Mary’s Catholic Cemetery in Kensal Green.

And so, we must ask ourselves a question that carries profound implications: Should someone be saying Kaddish for her neshama?

The Remarkable Life of a Jewish Heroine Before we address the halachic question, we must appreciate what this woman accomplished.

Krystyna Skarbek became the first female British agent to serve in the field during World War II and the longest-serving of all Britain’s wartime women agents. Perhaps her pintele Yid within her inspired her to make mul-

tiple dangerous crossings through the snow-covered Tatra Mountains into Nazi-occupied Poland. She smuggled microfilm containing intelligence about German troop buildups that reached Winston Churchill himself. She organized networks of couriers bringing vital intelligence from Warsaw to Budapest.

When she and a person working with her were arrested by the Gestapo in Budapest in January 1941, she saved them both through sheer cleverness— biting her tongue until it bled to fake symptoms of tuberculosis, convincing doctors she was terminally ill, leading to their release.

But her most famous exploit came in August 1944. SOE agents Francis Cammaerts and Xan Fielding had been captured by the Gestapo in Digne, France.

They were hours away from execution.

Skarbek, at tremendous personal risk, walked into the lion’s den. She met with the Gestapo commander, told him she was a British agent, and through a combination of threats, lies, and a twomillion-franc bribe, secured the release of all three prisoners. Only after the escape did the reality hit her: “What have I done! They could have shot me as well.”

She subverted Polish conscripts in the German army, convincing them to desert and destroy their own fortress.

She helped organize the French Resistance. She saved lives, countless lives.

And she was a Jew.

The Status Of Tinokes Shenishba The Rambam (Hilchos Mamrim 3:3) introduces a remarkable concept that has profound relevance to our discussion. He writes about the children of the Karaites, Jews who rejected the Oral Torah: “But their children and grandchildren, who were misled by their parents...

and were raised among the Karaites according to their views, such a person is like a child who was captured [tinokes shenishba] and raised among them. He is not eager to grasp the ways of mitzvos, for he is like one who was coerced.”

The Rambam continues: “Even if he later hears that he is Jewish and sees Jews and their Torah, he is still considered as one who was coerced, for he was raised in their mistaken ways.”

The concept derives from the Gemara in Shabbos (68b), which discusses a person who was captured as a child and raised among non-Jews, never knowing they were Jewish.

Krystyna Skarbek fits this category precisely. She was raised by an assimilated Jewish mother who had completely abandoned Jewish practice, in a home that practiced Roman Catholicism. She never had the opportunity to learn about her Jewish heritage or the obligations that came with it.

Can One Say Kaddish?

Kaddish serves multiple functions.

The Zohar (Parshas Vayakhel 196b) explains that a son’s kaddish elevates the soul of the departed parent. The Sefer HaPardes (attributed to Rashi) and the Ohr Zarua both discuss the power of kaddish to rescue souls from Gehinnom.

But what about a Jew who never practiced Judaism? What about someone who, through no fault of their own, was

The Zechus of Saving Lives There is another dimension to consider. The Gemara in Sanhedrin (37a) famously teaches: “Whoever saves a single

life, it is as if he saved an entire world.”

Krystyna Skarbek saved multiple lives. She rescued Allied soldiers from certain execution. She organized resistance networks that protected countless others. She risked her own life repeatedly for the sake of others.

The Chofetz Chaim (Ahavas Chesed, Part II, Chapter 2) writes that acts of chesed create tremendous zechus for a person’s neshama. The Vilna Gaon (Even Shleimah 1:7) emphasizes that middos tovos—good character traits—are the foundation upon which everything else rests.

Krystyna Skarbek exemplified mesiras nefesh at the highest level. She was fearless in the face of evil. She stood up against the Nazi regime that sought to destroy her own people, even though she didn’t know they were her people.

Is there not something deeply significant, even providential, in the fact that this woman—halachically Jewish, a descendant of Avraham, Yitzchak, and Yaakov—devoted her life to fighting the very enemy that was systematically murdering her fellow Jews in the Holocaust?

The Practical Question Rav Moshe Feinstein (Igros Moshe, Yoreh Deah I:162) discusses whether one

can say kaddish for someone who is not one’s own relative. He rules that anyone can say kaddish for any deceased Jew, though ideally it should be a relative.

The question, then, is straightforward: Should someone, anyone, be saying Kaddish for the neshama of Krystyna Skarbek?

Her yahrzeit is the 23rd of Sivan. This author believes that there is significant merit in doing so. Consider the following: She was halachically Jewish, as her mother was born Jewish. She was a tinokes shenishba in the most classic sense—she never had the opportunity to learn about her Jewish identity. She performed acts of tremendous chesed and mesiras nefesh, saving multiple lives. She fought against the Nazi regime during the darkest period of Jewish history. Her neshama may have no one advocating for it in Shamayim through the traditional channels of kaddish.

The Maharam Schick (Yoreh Deah 170) writes that saying kaddish benefits both the deceased and the one who says it. By saying kaddish for a Jew who has no one else to do so, we fulfill the mitzvah of chesed shel emes, true kindness, that has no expectation of reciprocity.

A Call To Action Krystyna Skarbek lived a life of extraordinary courage. She was, in the words of those who knew her, “the bravest of the brave.” She fought evil. She saved lives. She exemplified the highest ideals of human courage and self-sacrifice.

And she was one of us—a Jewish neshama, sent into this world through a Jewish mother, carrying within her the spark of kedushah that has passed through our people since Sinai.

She didn’t know it. But we do.

Perhaps there is a Jew somewhere who will take upon himself or herself to say Kaddish on the 23rd of Sivan each year. Perhaps a shul will remember her on that day, when we recite Kel Malei Rachamim.

She saved lives during the darkness of the Holocaust. Can we not do this small act of chesed for her neshama?

The “bravest of the brave” deserves no less.

This article should be viewed as a halachic discussion and not practical advice. The author can be reached at yairhoffman2@ gmail.com.

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completely disconnected from Torah?

The Gesher HaChaim (Vol. 1, Chapter 30) deals extensively with this question.

He notes that kaddish is said for all Jews, regardless of their level of observance during their lifetime. The Pischei Teshuvah (Yoreh Deah 376) cites authorities who maintain that we say kaddish even for sinners.

But Krystyna Skarbek was not a sinner in the traditional sense. She was a tinokes shenishba, someone who cannot be held accountable for what she did not know.

The Chazon Ish (Yoreh Deah 2:16) expanded the concept of tinokes shenishba dramatically. He wrote that in our era, even Jews who reject Torah are often in the category of tinokes shenishba because they were never properly exposed to authentic Torah and mitzvos. They cannot be held to the same standard as someone who knew the truth and rejected it.

How much more so does this apply to Krystyna Skarbek, who literally had no idea she was halachically Jewish!

The Jewish Home | DECEMBER 25, 2025

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School of

Thought

The Traveling Siddur

By Barbara Deutsch

D

espite all of our running around during our post-aliyah year, Bob and I were mostly homebodies with neither of us having the wanderlust that so many of our friends enjoyed. We both worked hard at our demanding jobs and were kept busy with the needs of our growing family.

We were also blessed to have both sets of parents (Bob was an only child) with us for long into their old age; as they got older, we felt that we needed to be more available.

As teachers, we had summers off, but as teachers, we did not earn the big bucks necessary to travel with a family. During our vacation, we would supplement our incomes by going to camp as staff. I loved my Morasha summers.

Once we made aliyah, travel became a priority on our bucket list. Life happened, and things did not go exactly as planned.

In December, when I was invited to join a trip to Paris with two of my granddaughters, Danielle and two of her girls, I knew it would be that once-in-a-lifetime experience that it was!

After a jam-packed two days filled with activities, shopping (no buying) and food delights, the trials and tribulations of getting home to Israel made me wonder why people would ever leave the comfort of home to travel anywhere.

Herewith is a summary of our all-day going-home experience.

We got up at the crack of dawn for our 11:00 a.m. flight. The faraway from anything kosher coffee shop where we wanted to buy breakfast first would not, then did, let us in to get food; there is no kosher food at De Gaulle Airport.

Danielle’s boarding pass did not print so we had to go to security. One of the guards was really nasty; he took our passports, checked them microscopically and then handed them back with a couple of the boarding passes missing. When we questioned their whereabouts, this guard’s response was to yell at us with a threat to withhold processing our check-in.

When we finally passed inspection and approached the check-in desk, we were told that our small plane could not accommodate any hand luggage. We brokered a

compromise wherein the agent allowed us to take one carryon bag on board.

We thought that we had budgeted sufficient time to shop for last-minute affordable gifts in the airport duty-free. We were wrong. Because Danielle’s one bag got flagged during the last security checkpoint, we lost precious time; the agent methodically searched through every item in her bag looking for a half bottle of facial cleanser and a forgotten Limoncello, gifted to Danielle when the restaurant owners recognized her.

The agent then took a victory lap and threw out anything deemed slightly suspicious. Our small party of six then raced to passport control for boarding.

There was one agent processing hundreds of people.

As we got to the front of the line, the justifiably overwhelmed agent stomped out of his booth and had a temper tantrum.

“Move back, or I shut down!”

We quickly headed to the wrong gate – my bad – and were last to board. A smiling stewardess demanded our last carryon bag; there was no more room on the plane. This bag was to be the last one off the plane.

On the plane, we were welcomed by a scowling stewardess who demanded that we squeeze our food-filled bags from the bakery under the seats; it was the only edible food we had for the whole crazy day.

An obsequious stewardess offered sandwich options that tempted no one. When we

asked her if there was anything else available, her response was simple and dripping in sugar, “You should have ordered.”

A kind stewardess brought wine (for me) and cold bottles of water.

Upon arrival in Israel, we were one of the last to leave the terminal. We waited for our carryon.

A Siddur Takes a Trip An ArtScroll siddur filled with Deutsch family memories made its way from Florida to Israel. Here’s how.

When Bob’s parents moved to Florida, their building, the Mimosa, had a shul in the basement. To even have a shul is a big deal because there are all kinds of permits that have to be filed to accommodate the laws and the needs of an elderly and often compromised population.

My father-in-law loved that shul; it was just a short elevator ride away and all of his card-playing cronies would be there for daily shmoozing. My mother-in-law had not been a big shul-goer in the past but she did love to dress up; hands down, Anyu was the most elegant woman you ever met, and going to shul was the best place to show off her fancy New York finery.

Both Anyu and Apu are now gone, and along with them, all of their worldly possessions.

In Florida, lifelong friends of ours, Abe and Helen, live next door to the Mimosa.

Abe davens in their minyan. He likes to

putter among the seforim and make sure they have order. One day, while searching for a siddur, he happened upon an ArtScroll one that included an inscription written in Bob’s chicken-scratch handwriting.

From the words written on the inside cover page, Abe was able to determine that it had once belonged to Anyu and should be returned to us. This past Friday, Abe and Helen’s granddaughter Ayumi, studying this year in Israel, knocked on my door and presented it to me in Israel.

As a Holocaust survivor struggling in Auschwitz, Anyu did not have much opportunity for schooling or to learn how to daven. In Florida, when she started going to shul on a regular basis, as is her nature, she wanted to know what she was reading in the siddur.

An ArtScroll one with all of its amenities was a perfect Mother’s Day gift.

The return of Anyu’s traveling siddur flooded me with memories both beautiful and difficult. It reminded me of how much I had lost, but more significantly, it showed me the value of shared values, friendship, and travel.

Sometimes, for the greater gain of the opportunity to enjoy Hashem’s miraculous world, you need to get out of your comfort zone and deal with difficult people and situations. Given a second chance at life, Anyu and Apu took every opportunity to live it to its fullest.

Abe and Helen love to travel, and they embrace every opportunity to go where interest and curiosity leads them. Because they travel, we got back Anyu’s siddur and, with it, memories of her special self.

The tale of the traveling siddur reminded me that I am blessed with loving family and friends who will go to any lengths to support me on this journey.

Barbara Deutsch is the former associate principal at HANC, middle school principal at Kushner, and Dean of Students at Yeshiva of Flatbush. A not-retired educator, she is trying to figure out life in Israel through reflections on navigating the dream of aliyah as a wife, mother, grandmother, great-grandmother and friend.

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A Chassid in the Cabinet Mitchell Silk Shares His Journey from Hong Kong to the White House

by Eliyahu Rosenberg In the hall of the Main Treasury Building talking with then Minister of Finance of Jamaica Nigel Clark and the Prime Minister Andrew Holness, along with then Jamaica Ambassador to the US Audrey Marks

very day, he’d walk into the U.S. Treasury building wearing the same uniform. A long-sleeved white shirt. Black suit.

Tie. And a black hat.

Every day, Mitchell (Moyshe) Silk would step into a world with little resemblance to his own. He was the Assistant Secretary of the Treasury for International Markets under Secretary Steven Mnuchin during President Trump’s first term in office. That was his official job title, anyway. But when Silk stood in the White House amongst government officials or met with foreign dignitaries over dinner, he was acutely aware of another role he was playing. He was a Jew — a frum Jew whose beard and attire made his religious identity apparent to all. He was the first — and to date, the only — chassidic Jew to serve in a Senate-confirmed position in government. So, in his senior position, he wasn’t only serving his country. He was representing his people.

“Because of my uniform, I felt that, every second, all eyes were on me,” Silk shares. “And whether it was the nod that I gave the janitor or one of the secretaries, or something that I said in meetings with the Secretary or other secretaries, it was the difference between a kiddush Hashem and a chillul Hashem.”

As assistant secretary, Silk ran the functional offices within the Treasury’s International Affairs Department. He spearheaded

work on the CARES Act, which saved airlines during the pandemic. He represented the U.S. before the Financial Stability Board, a major international standard-setting body. Among his many accomplishments, he is most proud of his work on the U.S.-China trade agreement and his global infrastructure financeinitiative, which positioned Washington globally as a counterweight to Beijing by helping developing countries gain stability through private market energy and infrastructure finance.

During Silk’s four years at the Treasury, he also worked with American allies and partners in the Western Hemisphere, Asia, the Middle East and Europe to help those countries achieve growth and stability by assisting them in identifying good value propositions in energy and infrastructure, something of which Silk had immense experience and knowledge to ensure. By the end of his tenure, the U.S. had 20 formal bilateral agreements signed and other engagements with around 30 other countries.

Silk notes that a lot of his success came from forming and strengthening relationships with other officials in these countries.

“The most effective channel that I found to succeed was to establish a personal connection with my counterparts.

“Very frequently, I would invite people over for dinner,” Silk recalls.

While living in Washington, D.C., Silk bought a townhouse in

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Meeting with Singapore officials, including Seth Tan, former head of Infrastructure Asia, established by the Monetary Authority of Singapore

the diplomatic district so he could entertain his guests. He would shop and prepare and cook the dishes himself.

“I used to serve them very nice kosher meals. I’d spice it up depending on who was coming. For example, for the Panamanian delegation, I cooked them a Mexican dish called Chicken Molé, prepared, of course, kosher. Holy Molé, as it were!”

Around Rosh Hashana time, Silk would bring more than 20 honey cakes baked by his wife to distribute to people in the Treasury building and in the White House. Getting them through security took logistics and convincing, but they were always a winner.

When Chairman Nguyen Van Binh, chair of the Central Economic Commission of the Communist Party of Vietnam, came to the United States on an official business trip, Silk organized a dinner at his home in Boro Park in which to introduce the Vietnamese official about Jewish culture. During the dinner, herring, liver, and p’tcha were on the menu, along with business discussions from three frum businessmen who Silk invited to the dinner to speak about the community and their charity efforts.

Through food and humor (he always knew what to say to make his colleagues and counterparts chuckle), Silk built connections and defused tense situations.

Once, Silk was in a major meeting during which U.S. and Chinese officials were set to negotiate a trade agreement. The meeting was set in an opulent, majestic room in Beijing’s Diaoyutai State Guest House. All the meeting’s details had been planned out before then, including the number of seats each side was allowed to have.

“Everybody sat down, but one guy [a man from the U.S. delegation] didn’t have a chair. He had to leave the room because he didn’t have a chair,” Silk recounts.

An hour and a half into the meeting, during a break, Silk left the room and found the U.S.’s Deputy Chief of Mission embroiled in a heated argument with the Chinese Ministry of Foreign Affairs protocol head. Apparently, the Chinese felt that their vice premier had been snubbed during a trip to the U.S. a couple of weeks prior.

And so, in retaliation, they weren’t willing to give the Americans another chair at the meeting.

The needless drama was threatening to derail the talks. So, I Silk jumped in.

“I tried to intercede by speaking Mandarin. But I didn’t get very far. I tried every which way: nice, firm. And I was about to give up, but then I saw the Governor of the People’s Bank of China walk by. I knew him very well,” Silk recalls.

“Governor Yi, we’ve got a little issue,” Silk informed his old friend, briefing him about the situation. “Can you help us out?”

At his Senate confirmation hearing.

In the background are his wife, son and father-in-law

For ten minutes, the governor tried to mediate the chair conflict. But to no avail.

“So I finally decided enough is enough. You know, we have a saying that I mention in my book: ‘Never get into a brawl with an imbecile, because they’ll drag you down to their level and then beat you on experience.’ So I decided to walk away,” he shares. “But before I did that, I said within earshot of Mr. Protocol — I said to Governor Yi, ‘Mr. Governor, I would like to invite you to my house for a scrumptious dinner next time you’re in Washington. I will

“The most effective channel that I found to succeed was to establish a personal connection with my counterparts.” serve you all the finest delicacies, some very, very nice wine. And you know what? You can have as many seats at the table as you’d like.’ And then I walked away.

“And guess what? We got our chair.”

M

itchell Silk grew up just outside of Chicago in your run-of-the-mill, middle-class, traditional Jewish family. Shortly before his bar mitzvah, he and his family moved to Florida. Then, after he turned 13, his life, in his words, “kind of took a sharp right.”

“My parents got divorced,” Silk shares. “Life became…not so easy. I felt when I was in high school that I needed to help my mother. She was raising three kids, mainly on her own, working double shifts as a nurse.

And I also kind of figured out that if I wanted to get a car and go to college, I was going to have to pay for it, because I couldn’t see how my mother could afford it.”

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Meeting with Nguyen Van Binh, one of Vietnam’s most senior political officials, who serves as Head of the Party Central Committee’s Economic Commission

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Swearing in as Assistant Secretary during COVID

After his Senate confirmation hearing with four of his eight children

So, in an effort to help his mother and achieve his own independence, teenage Mitchell got a job at a restaurant owned by his Chinese friend’s family. The cooks and his coworkers spoke Chinese.

“I was interested in being able to communicate with them.

When I progressed to becoming a waiter, the desire to learn Chinese became more of an imperative work-wise, because I recognized that if I wanted to get my food out of the kitchen quickly and therefore optimize my earnings potential through better tips, then I needed to learn Chinese,” he explains. “So, over a period of a couple of years, driving my friends crazy, I picked up Chinese.

But I didn’t realize until four years into it that the Chinese I was learning was a dialect that was spoken by over 90% of the Chinese in America, but less than 5% of the Chinese in China. It was Cantonese.”

Still, after learning Cantonese, he was hooked, and he felt compelled to learn Mandarin — the main dialect in China — as well. So, after finishing high school, Silk enrolled in a nine-week intensive summer program in Vermont’s Middlebury College and learned Mandarin.

“And then the director of the program suggested that if I wanted to continue my studies, I should go to Taiwan and study there, which I did,” he adds. “I went to Taiwan. I basically came back fluent in Mandarin, and I started my college career at Georgetown School of Foreign Service. My Chinese was at such a good level that there were actually no undergrad courses for me to take. So, I took one graduate course, and then I taught Chinese for my remaining three semesters there. I taught first- and third-year Chinese.”

Most people are shocked to hear that Silk lived in Hong Kong for over a decade. But what’s more shocking is how much he enjoyed being an Orthodox Jew in the Chinese administrative region.

“From a Jewish standpoint, I felt, both personally and communally, that the 15 years I spent in Hong Kong were the most rewarding times of my life,” he declares. He moved there to work for the law firm Chadbourne & Parke, and then Allen & Overy.

His years of experience in Hong Kong, working as a lawyer specializing in energy and infrastructure finance, and his fluency in Chinese would later make him a uniquely qualified candidate for Trump’s administration.

Aside from understanding Mandarin and Cantonese, Silk was also able to pick up on the nuances of the Chinese culture as he traveled through more than 20 provinces during the course of his work around China.

“It’s just plain, old sensitivity and empathy, like being emotionally aware of one’s surroundings,” he explains. “There are some very fundamental common traditions that run through all of Chi-

At his desk in his first office in Treasury

nese culture, some of which can be seen as false politeness. There are three or four things that you never want to get wrong. But still, there are regional variations that flow through that behavior. For example, in the northeast of China, it’s very cold there, and they eat very spicy food there, garlic, scallions, onions. This may explain why many people there tend to be sharper and may have shorter tempers, although you can’t overgeneralize. In contrast, Jiangsu province is home to many of China’s dynastic poets. In a province where people sat in their beautiful pagodas and drank their rice wine and wrote poetry, you tend to get more refined folks.”

“Everybody in our community should have a seat at the table and be more actively involved.”

Hong Kong and China are nothing like Boro Park, where Silk and his family live now, but it didn’t have to be, Silk says.

“We had three shuls and three restaurants,” he says about living in Hong Kong. “By the time I left, there were five shuls and five restaurants and virtually every kosher product you could need. My older kids, when they were growing up, had a great school that was run by the Sefardi community. There were a lot of travelers from abroad when I lived there; during some Shabbosim in shul, we would have 200 people. We constantly had people at our Shabbos table from all over the world.

“I ran the Chevra Kadisha. I had a shiur every day. I started my work on the Kedushas Levi, which I published a few years ago, when I was in Hong Kong. And so, I felt like I wasn’t lacking.

And to the contrary, I had a really, really rewarding and fulfilling Jewish life.”

He recalled one Sukkos in Hong Kong when he constructed a sukkah in a parking garage, only to have neighbors complain about the shaky structure. By the time the complaint was fully lodged, Sukkos was already over. Another year, Silk’s holy but flimsy structure survived strong winds and storms that slammed through his neighborhood, standing strong against the gusts.

T I

n A Seat at the Table, a book recently written and published by Silk, the author provides readers with an inside look at the economic revolution that took place nationally and globally during President Trump’s first term. According to Silk, his book’s title has three dimensions.

“My editor and I spent a lot of time thinking about what we wanted to call the book,” Silk recalls. “We had a bunch of options, but ultimately, we felt that ‘A Seat at the Table’ best represented the multiple dimensions I was trying to convey in the book. At the highest level, I wanted to convey to the audience that the President has given the United States and its people a seat at the table globally by pursuing firm policies that put the interests of the United States first – not to the exclusion of other countries, but first.”

Secondly, Silk wanted to show readers — each and every one of us — that we can and should have our own seats at the table — that we all could have a voice and a say on the issues that impact our community.

“Thankfully, we have great organizations like the Agudas Yisroel and OU that are lobbying and actively engaging with all levels of government. But the reality is that, as I’ve seen in my work of almost now three decades, there are never enough resources to go around,” he adds.

Silk is the Chairman Emeritus of the Pro Bono Legal Services program at Agudath Israel of America.

“Whether it’s pro bono lawyers, people who can lobby, go to meetings, write op-eds — whatever is required. I have long felt that we are grossly underrepresented, underrepresented at every level of government. And I feel that everybody in our community should have a seat at the table and be more actively involved. The reality is that there’s a place for everybody. There’s a place for everybody in every single issue.”

After all, as Silk notes, Rav Moshe Feinstein, zt”l, says in one of his teshuvos that we’re not only supposed to give money to tzedakah — we also need to donate our time in order to better our community.

And finally — the book’s third dimension — is the seat that G-d

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hrough his journey, Mr. Silk has had four guiding principles — or what he calls the “Four P’s”: Perseverance, Progress over perfection, Providence, and Personal touch.

Perseverance, he explains, is about “putting one’s head down and working very hard.” Being a hard worker. Being goal-oriented. Silk has exemplified this trait throughout his life in everything he does, starting with waiting tables at a Chinese restaurant to traveling the world while representing Trump’s global economic vision.

Progress over perfection is the philosophy that perfection is the enemy of the good — first focus on progress and then aim for perfection.

Providence is about seeing G-d’s hand in your life; to understand that what happens to you is not random. Rather, everything is decided by G-d. In fact, the first chapter in Silk’s recently published book is called “The Good L-rd Sent Me to a Chinese Restaurant” and begins with a quote from the Baal Shem Tov: “The movement of a single blade of grass in the depths of a forest, on a stately mountain or in a deep valley where man has never passed…is determined according to Divine providence.” The trick, though, is to recognize G-d’s omniscient presence and hand in all daily occurrences.

And personal touch is, as Silk puts it, about understanding “where there are commonalities with the people across the table and how to develop personal relationships.” Think herring, honey cake, and Yiddishe humor.

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At his book launch in Taiwan

blessed Mitchell Silk with…at the table of the U.S. government.

How did a humble Jewish boy from Chicago grow up to be the first chassidic Jew to hold a Senate-confirmed position in a presidential administration? How did he end up becoming a lawyer, finding chassidus, and emerging as a legal and trade expert living in Hong Kong for over a decade? Why did young Mitchell, while working at a

“For the Panamanian delegation, I cooked them a Mexican dish called Chicken Molé, prepared, of course, kosher. Holy Molé, as it were!”

Chinese restaurant, feel so passionate about learning Chinese, and how did he find the discipline to master the language?

“I can’t explain it. I mean, I would love to tell you that I had my whole life planned out and that I knew that when I was in my 50s, I was going to get a senior position at the Treasury Department because of my expertise in China and infrastructure finance — but that’s actually everything but the case,” Silk admits.

“If I look at every turn: from teenager to go to work at the Chinese restaurant to learning Cantonese, then having to stop and learn Mandarin, and then the Mandarin taking me to a certain program at Georgetown, and then that program at Georgetown sending me to a certain program at the University of Maryland Law School. And then that leading to my working on Wall Street in Chinese law, and then that leading to me getting hired by a firm that was opening up in Hong Kong to pursue infrastructure finance opportunities in the China market that had just happened. And then all of that leading to me building up skills over two decades in infrastructure finance, and that being attractive to the President when he was elected in 2017…

“It’s just hashgacha after hashgacha after hashgacha.”

nspiration Nation

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R’ Moshe Tuvia Lieff When a Jew Feels Good About Himself, He’s Invincible

By Eliyahu RosEnBERg

O

ne of the hardest parts of being a rav, according to the Rav Moshe Tuvia Lieff, is helping the community deal with its tzaaros.

“Every time there’s a tzarah, it rips out of a piece of your heart,” Rabbi Lieff admits.

“You take it to heart. And the challenge is to listen without having a broken heart.”

It’s unbelievable — the challenges that people go through, spiritually, physically, emotionally, financially, and otherwise.

Shalom bayis, parnassa, issues with having and raising children, shidduch struggles — anything you could imagine. And when you’re a community leader, people rely on you for guidance. They turn to you for a listening ear.

Sometimes, to help someone who’s struggling, the only thing you can do is cry with them. But more often than not, the best thing to do is raise their spirits, to transform their tears into smiles. And that’s the biggest challenge.

“The challenge is to be upbeat. To be positive,” Rav Lieff declares. “You have to try to be a positive role model, but you can only do that if you’re positive yourself. The saddest thing is a clown that’s crying on the inside.”

As Rav Lieff notes, the Maharsha highlights the unbreakable bond between G-d and His people. When Jews are in pain, Hashem feels the pain with them. When a Yid’s arm hurts, Hashem declares, so to speak, that His arm also hurts. When a Jew suffers from a headache, G-d too feels that pain. And when a Jew is depressed, Heaven forbid, Hashem is equally sad. “So, when you cheer up another Yid,” Rabbi Lieff shares, “you’re cheering up, k’viyachol, Hashem.”

And that’s one of the heaviest responsibilities of being a rav, according to Rabbi Lieff: to lift people up, to inspire, to teach positivity through example. To elevate the downtrodden.

“The challenge that people have today in Yiddishkeit is to make it exciting, to make it real, to daven, to understand what they’re saying, to mean what they’re saying, and saying what they mean,” Rabbi Lieff adds. “Reb Moshe, zt”l, used to say, ‘The worst thing you can say is that it’s hard to be a Jew.’ You have to say it’s geshmak, it’s exciting. And we have to do that more.” * * * Rav Moshe Tuvia Lieff, the Morah

In His Words…

When a yid feels good about himself, he’s invincible. and when we cause other people to feel good about themselves, the sky’s the limit as to what we can accomplish. a monumental person could do insignificant things and create greatness. Meanwhile, an insignificant person could do monumental things, and it’s meaningless. We all have to realize that we are monumental people, and we can build people.

Reb Moshe, zt”l, used to say, ‘The worst thing you can say is that it’s hard to be a Jew.’ you have to say it’s geshmak, it’s exciting. and we have to do that more.

D’Asra of Agudas Yisroel Bais Binyamin in Brooklyn, New York, was born and raised in Brooklyn. One of his greatest mentors was Rav Shmuel Berenbaum, zt”l, his rebbi and father-figure, whose unparalleled compassion and intellect inspired Rav Lieff’s own approach to leading communities. Indeed, Rav Berenbaum sparked within Rav Lieff a lifelong passion for spreading Torah.

“I learned harbatzas Torah from Rav Shmuel Berenbaum. He would give a shiur to anyone and everyone,” Rav Lieff recalls.

“Learning and teaching Torah is the mitzvah that resonates with me the most.”

Though he’s been back in Brooklyn for many years now, Rav Lieff, for nearly twenty years, served as the rav of K’hal Bais Yisroel in Minneapolis. As the out-of-town community’s leader, Rav Lieff transformed Minneapolis into a thriving center of Yiddishkeit and Talmud Torah.

From his mentors, Rav Lieff learned that rebbeim have the power to change their talmidim’s lives. Being a rebbi comes with great responsibility: a rebbi could, chas v’shalom, hurt a talmid. But by the same token, a rebbi (and a teacher and leader in general) could positively transform a student’s life forever. Very often, it’s the little things — the seemingly insignificant remarks or actions — that make the greatest impact: a smile, a word of encouragement, or a small compliment could have everlasting effects.

“There are so many ways that a person could impact others, and they don’t have to be a rav, a rosh yeshiva, a rebbi, or a morah. Just a kind word,” Rav Lieff remarks. “The legendary figures, Shifra and Puah, seemingly have simple names.

But they were the mother and sister

of Moshe Rabbeinu; they saved his life.

Yocheved saved the nation, but she has a simple name. She went to Paroah, and she combed the hair of the child.

“Because a monumental person could do insignificant things and create greatness. Meanwhile, an insignificant person could do monumental things and it’s meaningless. We all have to realize that we are monumental people, and we can build people. That’s what our dor needs more than anything else: just a little validation, a pat on the back,” the rav adds.

“As Rav Levenstein, zt”l, would say, ‘Everybody needs a teaspoon of kavod, of honor, of glory, for breakfast. You need to feel good about yourself.”

According to Rav Lieff, when we feel good about ourselves, it’s much easier to be good. The best way to resist sin is not through guilt or shame — it’s not by threatening yourself, being terrified of retribution, or fearing a spiritual fall.

Rather, the best way to reject our yetzer haras is by believing that we’re too dignified — too holy — to stoop to such a level; to believe that sinning is simply below us.

The greatest tzaddikim are the ones who love themselves; they live their best lives because they believe that they deserve kedusha and closeness with Hashem.

Meanwhile, the most troubled individuals — those who make unfortunate choices and live destructive lives — are the ones who are unhappy with themselves; who don’t think they’re worthy of happiness or self-improvement. If you love yourself, you’ll give yourself a chance.

“When a Yid feels good about himself, he’s invincible,” Rav Lieff declares. “And when we cause other people to feel good about themselves, the sky’s the limit as to what we can accomplish.”

This article is based on a podcast, “Inspiration For the Nation,” hosted by Yaakov Langer. To catch more of this conversation, you can watch it on LivingLchaim.com or YouTube.com/LivingLchaim or listen wherever you listen to podcasts (just search for “Inspiration For The Nation”) or call our free hotline: 605-477-2100

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Dating Dialogue

What Would You Do If… Moderated by Jennifer Mann, LCSW of The Navidaters

Dear Navidaters,

Dear Navidaters, I’m 23, working as a caterer in a local kollel, and the girl I’m dating is 26 and works as an algebra-1 teacher for tenth graders.

Things are going very well. She is a kind, thoughtful and bubbly person. Recently, I noticed she is very into “soft parenting.” This is a form of “discipline” in which children are punished in a lighter, more gentle way, rather than with harsh talks. For example, her nephew (aged 6-7) bit another kid in the park, and instead of sternly disciplining him, she started to ask her nephew about how he was feeling, and even offered some “alone time” rather than apologizing to the other child. Later that day, he acted out again, this time almost swallowing a quarter that I dropped, while I was trying to put it in the parking meter. Instead of reprimanding him, she praised his early entrepreneurship and infatuation with money.

My question to you is as follows. Should I be more open-minded to newer or different parenting styles that I one day may want to implement with my spouse, or is this a serious red flag that I cannot get around?

Looking forward to your insight, Yakov*

Disclaimer: This column is not intended to diagnose or otherwise conclude resolutions to any questions. Our intention is not to offer any definitive conclusions to any particular question, rather offer areas of exploration for the author and reader. Due to the nature of the column receiving only a short snapshot of an issue, without the benefit of an actual discussion, the panel’s role is to offer a range of possibilities. We hope to open up meaningful dialogue and individual exploration.

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Dear Readers, We want to offer YOU an opportunity to be part of the discussion!

Please email us at MichelleMondShadchan@gmail.com, subject line “reader’s response,” if you would like to participate in the new “A Reader’s Response” columnist spot. We will send you a question and publish your answer in an upcoming Navidaters edition.

If you have a question you would like the Navidaters to answer, please reach out to this email as well.

Looking forward!

Michelle, the “Shadchan”

The Rebbetzin Rebbetzin Faigie Horowitz, M.S.

Y

akov, you are lucky that this came up. It’s an opportunity to see how the young woman handles differences with a potential partner, how flexible is she about considering other points of view.

Ask yourself how the discussion about discipline went. Is she open to considering other styles of parenting? Did you discuss the current style of taking parenting courses? Why yeshivas and day schools sometimes make it conditional upon enrollment? What does she think her role is with her nephew? What do you think her role is when she is with her nephew?

Did she have insightful remarks to share about kids? Does she consider herself an expert on kids? Whose parenting does she admire? Why is she into this kind of parenting? Where did this come from in her life at her age?

Both of you should explore this issue further and other areas of difference.

That will give you more insight into her attitudes and whether she is open to hearing from others and negotiating differences with understanding.

ing/discipline styles. However, I would like to share something that you might not realize.

A single girl without any children taking care of her nephew is very different than a mother taking care of her own child. There is a certain strength and bina that comes with having your own child vs. taking care of someone else’s. I remember when I was taking care of my “chessed children” during my years in Israel. The things I let those kids get away with would make my kids today so jealous of that version of me! (I hope they’re not reading this!) While it is true that the way the girl you’re dating reacted in both of your examples was lenient, maybe even irresponsible, you also have to understand that she is not a mother yet. Right now, the girl you are dating is acting like a doting aunt to her nephew, not a mother.

If you would like to understand more about her future vision surrounding parenting styles you must talk to her about it, not assume based on her interactions with her nephew.

You should also understand that what you talk about now together “in theory” will likely change when you have your own children, based on the nature of your kids and what each one individually needs.

Keep this all in mind and in perspective when moving forward. Hatzlacha!

The Shadchan The Zaidy Michelle Mond

I

understand your concern and you are smart for bringing it up. This is definitely grounds for a DMC (deep, meaningful conversation) with her regarding parent-

Dr. Jeffrey Galler

I

just finished reading Hostage, by Eli Sharabi. It was a very emotional read. It

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reminded me of Eli Wisel’s Night-DawnDay. I cried like a baby.

And it made me realize something important. Many Navidater questions can be answered in the following manner: If you feel a mutual attraction to someone who shares your goals, values, and aspirations, allow yourself to fall in love. Get married. Have many children. Raise them strong and raise them proud.

If you do share the same goals, values, and aspirations, you should be able to agree to take care of each other and bring out the best in each other. If so, almost all other considerations, such as differing parenting styles, are either trivial or easily negotiable. These mat-

ters tend to work themselves out as you live together, grow together, and mature together.

Am Yisrael chai.

The Reader’s Response A Single’s Perspective Aliza Sklar Life Coach

H

i Yakov, When I read your question, my mind went in several directions. My

first thought was to check the research on gentle parenting as that was the crux of the question as you wrote it.

So I had AI pull some studies for me :). From what I’ve found, there is a need for greater research into the efficacy of “gentle parenting,” as there is not much data currently out and no long-term data at all.

But the deeper question I have for you is: can you discuss this with the woman you’re dating? While your thoughts on gentle parenting may be raising a flag, the bigger flag will be waving if you don’t feel comfortable bringing up the question with her.

In general, how do you feel discussing bigger topics and raising important, yet potentially controversial, ideas with her?

On your next date, see if you can tactfully bring up the question (using

Compatibility isn’t about agreeing on everything.

one or both of the examples) and watch how she responds. Does the way she interacts with the conversation bring you closer to her or push you farther apart?

It’s also possible you are uncomfortable bringing up this issue with her directly. If that is the case, I would advise working on the skill independently of this young lady, as being able to have tough conversations is a valuable tool, essential across many areas of life.

Hatzlacha rabba.

Pulling It All Together The Navidaters Dating and Relationship Coaches and Therapists

D

ear Yakov, This is a good question. And it’s good that you’re asking it.

You’re not nitpicking. You’re noticing something that lands in your body and you’re wondering whether to trust that feeling or override it in the name of being “open-minded.”

Let me say this clearly right up front: noticing this doesn’t make you old-fashioned, rigid, or closed. It makes you observant.

What you’re responding to isn’t really a parenting trend. It’s a values moment.

Parenting styles are just the surface language we use for deeper beliefs about limits, responsibility, accountability, and how people learn to live in the world.

And those beliefs matter a lot when two people are imagining a future together.

When you watched a child bite another child and not be guided toward repair, or saw a potentially dangerous moment reframed as praise, it makes sense that something in you paused.

Not because you’re judging her.

But because your system is asking, Who holds the line here?

That’s an important question.

Now, here’s the part where I don’t want you to jump too fast.

This is not automatically a red flag.

She’s not a parent yet. You’re not a parent yet. Many people have strong ideas in theory that soften, sharpen, or completely change once they’re actually responsible for a real child, day in and day out.

At the same time, it would be a mis-

take to tell yourself this is irrelevant.

Because this isn’t really about her nephew. It’s about how the two of you imagine handling moments when something goes wrong.

Do we start with empathy and stop there?

Do we pair empathy with accountability?

How do limits get set?

How do kids learn responsibility?

Those are not small questions.

Instead of debating labels or trends, I’d suggest talking about real situations.

Not to win, and not to correct her, but to understand how she thinks.

You might ask: “What do you think kids need most when they cross a line?”

“How do you see children learning accountability?”

“What does discipline mean to you?”

“Where do limits fit in for you?”

Then listen.

If she’s thoughtful, reflective, and open to nuance, that’s a good sign. If she’s rigid, dismissive of limits, or uncomfortable even exploring the question, that’s information worth taking seriously.

Compatibility isn’t about agreeing on everything. It’s about whether you can build something together.

So no, you don’t need to decide today whether this is a dealbreaker.

But yes, you should trust yourself enough not to brush it off.

Parenting philosophies shape children.

They shape marriages.

And they shape daily life.

Stay curious. Stay honest. And don’t talk yourself out of what you’re noticing.

Sincerely, Jennifer

Jennifer Mann, LCSW is a licensed psychotherapist and certified trauma healing life coach, as well as a dating and relationship coach working with individuals, couples, and families in private practice at 123 Maple Avenue in Cedarhurst, NY. To set up a consultation or to ask questions, please call 718-908-0512. Visit www.thenavidaters.com for more information. If you would like to submit a dating or relationship question to the panel anonymously, please email JenniferMannLCSW@gmail.com. You can follow The Navidaters on FB and Instagram for dating and relationship advice.

Wired for Connecti

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By Michal Goldman, LCSW

I

n the world of relationships, few things cause more rapid damage than unchecked assumptions. This plays out in all areas of life but happens most often in long-term relationships, when you already know your partner well and expect them to react in a specific way.

Consider Maya and Ben, cleaning up after dinner. Ben, intending to suggest a smoother routine, comments, “Next time, maybe we can plan ahead so it’s not so hectic.”

For Ben, this was a simple observation. But for Maya, the message was instantly translated through an old, painful filter. Ben often criticized Maya for her housework, and they’ve been married long enough for her to expect that to be the case. She didn’t pause to ask for clarity; instead, she jumped to a painful conclusion: “So you’re saying I didn’t plan well enough?” She heard an attack, not an invitation to collaborate.

This common dynamic, where one partner speaks with good intention and the other reacts through an old lens, is what we try to help couples understand and change in couples therapy.

In Emotionally Focused Therapy, a type of couples therapy with years of evidence backing it, we call these moments “cycles.” A cycle is a predictable, negative pattern of interaction that takes over when both partners stop responding to the present moment and start responding to old fears.

When Maya immediately assumes a critical meaning in Ben’s tone or words, her nervous system remembers past pain—perhaps a time she felt judged or not good enough—and prepares to defend. She folds her arms and cuts him off: “Oh, I know what you meant.” Ben, who in this moment was trying to be collaborative and was not thinking critically of his wife, is now feeling misunderstood and attacked and believes he’s never willing to be heard.

What began as a simple comment about dinner clean-up grew into a story each was telling themselves: She told herself he thought she was careless. He told himself she was never willing to hear him. The key here is that he may think that she is careless at times, and she may have a hard time hearing him at times. However, when couples expect that to always be the case because it has been true at times, it creates a lot of extra unnecessary tension in the house.

The pattern that Ben and Maya are in makes perfect sense in light of old emotional experiences, yet it also prevents them from seeing what is truly happening now. Assumptions fill the blanks with fear, expectation, or perceived threat, and without clarity, both partners end up responding to their own internal fears rather than to each other.

Ben and Maya’s work in couples therapy is to create a conscious shift in this automatic reaction. The goal is to choose to slow down and check in instead of jumping to a conclusion.

Imagine the simple change a check-in could have made for Maya and Ben. If Ben had noticed Maya’s defensiveness, he could have slowed the cycle down: “I can imagine how based on past experiences you could see that as a criti-

cism. I’m sorry we’ve had those experiences in the past, and here, I didn’t mean to criticize – I was hoping to work as a team because we are both stuck here.”

If Maya had been able to notice the hurt first, she could have gently checked her assumption: “That comment felt hurtful to me, and I’m taking it like you’re blaming me. Is that how you meant it?”

The real game-changer happens when a partner shares the raw emotion beneath the assumption. If Maya could just say, “I’m worried you’re disappointed in me,” the whole conversation would instantly shift. Instead of fighting over who was right or wrong, they move straight into genuine connection, using the misunderstanding as a bridge. This kind of bond forms when both people commit to dropping their guard and truly listening. It takes practice and work from both partners, but when both partners commit to the practice, it gets easier and more powerful, leading to better understanding, a much stronger connection, and finally breaking those negative habits.

Try This at Home 1. Notice the Story Forming in Your Mind.

When a conversation begins to feel

tense or uncomfortable, take a breath.

Ask yourself: What meaning am I giving to my partner’s words right now? What story am I creating? Awareness brings you back to the present moment, out of the old loop.

2. Check What You Heard.

Simple, clarifying questions are your best tool against assumptions. Try saying: “I want to make sure I understood.

Is this what you meant?” Or, “I heard you say [X], but I felt [Y]. Can you tell me more about what you intended?” This small act of checking stops a spiral before it begins.

3. Speak From Your Heart, Not Your Defense.

If you notice defensiveness, hurt, or fear, share the raw emotion gently. Avoid accusation and use “I” statements. Say something like, “I felt nervous when I heard that,” or “I worry that you might be upset with me.” Honest vulnerability invites connection and care from your partner.

When partners learn to pause and ask instead of assume, the entire tone of their communication changes. It becomes less about defending and more about mutual understanding. Each moment of checking in becomes a small, deliberate act of care, transforming what could have been another argument into an opportunity to feel close again.

Michal Goldman is a licensed clinical social worker in Queens specializing in helping individuals and couples navigate relationship challenges. She can be reached through her website at www.michalgoldmanlcsw.org, via email at michalgoldmanlcsw@gmail. com, or by phone at 917-590-0258. If you have questions that you would like answered here, you can submit them to the email provided. This content is for educational and informational purposes only and is not a replacement for therapy.

DECEMBER 25, 2025 | The Jewish Home

The Dangerous Power of Assumptions

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Health & F tness

The Side Effects We Never Name in Psychiatry

By Rivka Kramer, PMHNP-BC

H

ere is a truth that psychiatry understands well but rarely states plainly enough. Every choice in mental health care has side effects, including the choice not to treat. Yet the public conversation almost exclusively focuses on the risks of medication, while the consequences of untreated psychiatric illness remain largely invisible, unnamed, and oddly normalized.

In psychiatry, there is no such thing as a neutral decision. There is only intervention that is acknowledged and intervention that quietly happens on its own.

We are very good at discussing medication side effects. They are printed clearly.

They are taught in training programs. They are discussed in careful, serious tones during informed consent conversations.

Weight changes. Sedation. Emotional flattening. Gastrointestinal discomfort. Rare but serious risks that must always be mentioned, even if unlikely. This transparency matters. Patients deserve to know what they are putting into their bodies and how it might affect them.

But psychiatry is not only about what medications do. It is also about what symptoms do when they are left to run their course.

And that part of the conversation is often missing.

The Illusion of the Neutral Baseline Many people approach psychiatric medication with the belief that declining it preserves some original, untouched version of themselves. As if not medicating keeps the mind in a natural state, while medication introduces something artificial and disruptive.

This belief is deeply ingrained and culturally reinforced. Medication is framed as an add-on, an alteration, a deviation from the real self. Meanwhile, anxiety, depression, mood instability, compulsions, and attentional impairment are framed as personal struggles to manage rather than

moral failure. Anxiety becomes weakness.

Mood swings become personality defects.

This internalization is one of the most damaging side effects of not treating psychiatric illness. It erodes self-trust and self-compassion. Patients often arrive in psychiatric care not only suffering from symptoms but carrying years of shame layered on top of them.

Ironically, when medication is finally introduced and symptoms improve, many people grieve the years they spent believing they were simply not trying hard enough.

Fear of Medication Versus Fear of Illness biological processes unfolding in real time.

But the brain does not wait for permission.

Psychiatric symptoms are not static traits. They are active processes involving neurotransmitters, neural circuits, stress hormones, sleep architecture, and emotional regulation systems. When untreated, these systems continue to fire, reinforce, and entrench themselves. Patterns deepen. Thresholds lower. Episodes become easier to trigger and harder to recover from.

From a psychiatric perspective, untreated illness is not the absence of intervention. It is the continuation of pathology.

What Untreated Illness Actually Does Over Time One of the challenges in psychiatry is that untreated symptoms often do not look dramatic in the short term. They look manageable. Livable. Familiar. People adapt.

They develop coping strategies. They reorganize their lives around their symptoms without realizing they are doing so.

An anxious person avoids certain situations and calls it preference. A depressed person withdraws socially and calls it introversion. Someone with ADHD underperforms academically or professionally

and calls it lack of discipline. A person with bipolar disorder normalizes periods of instability because they have never known sustained equilibrium.

Over time, these adaptations accumulate consequences.

In psychiatric practice, untreated illness often presents indirectly. It shows up as relationship conflict rather than anxiety.

As career stagnation rather than attention impairment. As chronic fatigue rather than mood disorder. As irritability, shame, self criticism, or burnout rather than a diagnosable condition that could have been addressed earlier.

These are side effects. They simply do not come with warning labels.

The Psychological Cost of Untreated Symptoms Psychiatry is not only concerned with symptom reduction. It is deeply concerned with identity, self-concept, and meaning. Untreated psychiatric illness has a powerful effect on how people understand themselves.

When symptoms persist without explanation or relief, people tend to internalize them. Difficulty concentrating becomes laziness. Emotional reactivity becomes a character flaw. Low motivation becomes

In psychiatry, fear of medication is common and understandable. The brain feels personal in a way no other organ does.

Anything that alters mood, perception, or cognition can feel like a threat to identity itself.

Patients often say they are afraid of losing their personality, their creativity, their emotional depth, or their sense of self.

These fears should never be dismissed. Psychiatry, at its best, takes them seriously and responds with careful dosing, thoughtful selection, and ongoing dialogue.

But what often goes unexamined is the fear of the illness itself.

Untreated psychiatric conditions also alter personality, creativity, relationships, and emotional range. Chronic anxiety narrows life. Depression flattens joy. Mood instability strains trust. Obsessive thinking hijacks attention. Trauma reshapes perception and threat response.

From a psychiatric standpoint, the question is not whether the brain will be altered. It already is. The question is whether treatment can alter it in a direction that reduces suffering rather than perpetuates it.

The Time Factor in Psychiatric Illness Psychiatry is uniquely sensitive to time. Many conditions have a longitudinal

sleep, immune function, cardiovascular health, and overall longevity. The mind and body are not separate systems.

When patients are only told about medication risks without discussing the risks of ongoing illness, the conversation is incomplete. It unintentionally reinforces the idea that doing nothing is safer, when in reality it is simply less examined.

The Goal Of Living Fully The ultimate goal of psychiatry is not symptom elimination at all costs. It is quality of life. It is helping people live

Untreated psychiatric illness has a powerful effect on how people understand themselves.

may already be damaged. Careers may already be limited. Self esteem may already be deeply wounded.

Time, in psychiatry, is not passive. It is an active variable.

What Informed Consent Should Really Include

with greater flexibility, agency, and emotional range.

Medication, when appropriately prescribed, does not aim to flatten experience.

It aims to reduce the noise enough for life to be lived more freely. For many patients, it creates space for therapy to work, for relationships to heal, for insight to deepen, and for growth to occur.

This does not mean medication is the right choice for everyone. But it does mean that refusing to discuss the consequences of not treating psychiatric illness does a disservice to those who are struggling quietly.

Psychiatry must continue to move toward more honest, nuanced conversations.

Ones that acknowledge fear without amplifying stigma. Ones that respect autonomy without romanticizing suffering.

The question should never be framed as medication versus strength. It should be framed as which set of risks is more acceptable for this person, at this time, in this body, with this life.

Because untreated psychiatric illness is not benign. It shapes trajectories, identities, and relationships in ways that are profound and lasting.

Medication has side effects. That is true.

But so does not medicating.

True informed consent in psychiatry should include both sides of the equation.

Not only what might happen if a medication is started, but what is likely to happen if symptoms remain untreated.

This includes emotional consequences, relational consequences, occupational consequences, and physical health consequences. Chronic psychiatric stress affects

Rivka Kramer is a Board Certified Psychiatric Nurse Practitioner. She has a psychiatric private practice based in Cedarhurst, NY. She serves as a member of the board of JANPPA, the Jewish American Nurse Practitioner Psychiatric Association. She can be reached at 516-945-9443.

Medication as One Tool, Not an Identity One of the most persistent misconceptions in psychiatry is that starting medication defines a person. As if taking psychiatric medication means accepting a permanent label or conceding something fundamental about oneself.

In reality, medication is a tool. It is one component of care that may be temporary or long-term depending on the individual, the diagnosis, and the phase of life.

Some people use medication briefly during acute episodes. Others benefit from longer stabilization. Many adjust doses over time. Some eventually taper off.

Others remain on maintenance treatment to prevent relapse.

Psychiatry does not view medication as a moral statement. It views it as a risk benefit calculation made in the context of a person’s lived experience.

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course. Episodes recur. Neural pathways strengthen through repetition. The longer symptoms go untreated, the more ingrained they can become.

This does not mean medication must always be immediate or lifelong. But it does mean that prolonged avoidance of treatment out of fear can carry its own risks.

In clinical practice, it is common to see patients who functioned just well enough for years, only to reach a breaking point later in life. At that point, treatment becomes more complex, recovery slower, and consequences harder to reverse. Relationships

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Health & F tness

Weight Loss Surgery and Nutrition What You Need to Know

By Aliza Beer MS, RD, CDN

B

ariatric surgery is one of the most effective clinical interventions for the treatment of severe obesity.

These procedures are not intended for cosmetic weight loss but rather for individuals whose obesity poses significant health risks and who have not achieved sustained weight loss through lifestyle and medical interventions alone. Standard eligibility criteria for bariatric surgery typically include a body mass index (BMI) of ≥40, or a BMI of ≥35 in the presence of at least one obesity-related comorbidity (type 2 diabetes, hypertension, dyslipidemia, and obstructive sleep apnea). In some cases, individuals with a BMI of 30-35 and poorly controlled metabolic disease may also be considered, depending on clinical guidelines and individual risk assessment.

Personally, I have seen how powerful these procedures can be and how challenging long-term success can be without continued lifestyle change. Many patients initially feel a sense of relief after surgery, believing the operation alone will permanently solve their weight struggles. However, as time passes and appetite gradually returns, the real work begins.

Surgery can provide the potential and encouragement for weight loss, however, it is not guaranteed. Long-term outcomes depend on what patients do after the procedure, not just the procedure itself.

How Bariatric Surgery Works Bariatric surgeries promote weight loss through two primary mechanisms: restriction and malabsorption. Restrictive procedures reduce the size of the stomach, limiting the amount of food that can be consumed at one time and promoting early satiety. Malabsorptive procedures alter the digestive tract to reduce the absorption of nutrients by bypassing portions of the small intestine.

Some surgeries combine both restrictive

tein and micronutrient intake. For these reasons, ongoing nutritional monitoring and professional support are important.

Without proper dietary guidance, even this less malabsorptive procedure can lead to nutrient deficiencies and gradual weight regain.

Adjustable Gastric Banding

and malabsorptive components. These differences influence the degree of weight loss achieved, the risk of nutritional deficiencies, and the level of long-term dietary management required.

The most commonly performed bariatric procedures include Roux-en-Y gastric bypass, sleeve gastrectomy, and adjustable gastric banding, each with distinct benefits, limitations, and nutritional considerations.

min B12, folate, calcium, vitamin D, and fat-soluble vitamins. If unmanaged, these deficiencies can lead to anemia, bone disease, and neurological complications.

For this reason, ongoing guidance from a registered dietitian and other healthcare professionals is essential to ensure nutritional adequacy, appropriate supplementation, and long-term safety following surgery.

Roux-en-Y Gastric Bypass (RYGB)

Sleeve gastrectomy is a procedure which involves removing approximately 70-80% of the stomach, leaving a narrow gastric “sleeve.” Unlike gastric bypass, sleeve gastrectomy does not reroute the intestines and is therefore considered primarily restrictive rather than malabsorptive. Patients often experience significant early weight loss and reduced hunger due to decreased production of ghrelin, a hormone associated with appetite.

Despite the absence of intestinal bypass, sleeve gastrectomy is still associated with nutritional deficiencies. Reduced stomach capacity and decreased acid production can impair absorption of iron, vitamin B12, calcium, and vitamin D, and early satiety may limit adequate pro-

Roux-en-Y gastric bypass is a widely accepted bariatric procedure that has been performed for several decades in the management of severe obesity. The procedure creates a small gastric pouch and bypasses a portion of the small intestine, producing both restrictive and malabsorptive effects. Patients typically experience significant early weight loss and rapid improvements in metabolic conditions such as type 2 diabetes due to hormonal changes that suppress appetite and improve insulin sensitivity.

The malabsorptive nature of RYGB places patients at high risk for micronutrient deficiencies, particularly iron, vita-

Sleeve Gastrectomy

Adjustable gastric banding is a good option since it is reversible and does not involve cutting or bypassing the stomach or intestines. The procedure involves placing an inflatable band around the upper portion of the stomach to slow food intake and promote early satiety.

While nutritional deficiencies are less common with this procedure, patients who undergo adjustable gastric banding generally experience less weight loss and higher rates of weight regain compared to gastric bypass and sleeve gastrectomy.

While the surgical risks are lower compared to other procedures, it is important to consider mechanical complications, such as band slippage or erosion, are common and often require reoperation.

Weight Regain After Bariatric Surgery Although bariatric surgery leads to significant short-term weight loss, maintaining that weight loss over time can be difficult. Long-term research shows that some degree of weight regain is common several years after surgery. A systematic review by King et al. (2020) examined weight regain after Roux-en-Y gastric bypass and sleeve gastrectomy and found that many patients gradually regain a portion of the weight they initially lost. In a large reference group of gastric bypass patients, the median amount of weight regained increased from about 8% of the maximum weight lost at three years after surgery to nearly 24% by six years post-surgery. Weight regain seems to be

trition education, behavior modification, and consistent follow-up rather than another procedure.

The Registered Dietitian’s Role In the short term, dietitians guide patients through postoperative diet stages, ensuring adequate hydration, protein intake, and tolerance to foods. They provide

to prevent weight regain while ensuring nutritional adequacy. It is important to emphasize that bariatric surgery is not an easy or effortless solution to obesity.

These procedures provide a physiological advantage by restricting stomach capacity and, in some cases, reducing nutrient absorption, which can help patients lose weight. However, they do not eliminate

Long-term success depends on continued adherence to a balanced, nutrient-rich diet, portion control, and mindful eating.

structured support as patients transition from liquids to purees and then to solid foods, helping to prevent complications such as dehydration, protein malnutrition, and gastrointestinal intolerance.

In the long term, dietitians help patients adapt as appetite returns, weight loss slows, and behavioral challenges emerge. They offer education, individualized strategies, and ongoing monitoring

the need to follow a healthy lifestyle.

Surgery is best understood as a tool that facilitates weight loss, but long-term success depends on continued adherence to a balanced, nutrient-rich diet, portion control, and mindful eating. Without these habits, even patients who initially lose large amounts of weight can experience gradual regain.

Evidence consistently shows that pa-

tients who maintain regular follow-up with dietitians achieve better weight maintenance, fewer deficiencies, and improved quality of life. Dietitian-led interventions are particularly critical as patients move further from surgery and the physiological effects diminish. By providing ongoing guidance, individualized nutrition plans, and behavioral support, dietitians play a central role in helping patients maximize the benefits of surgery while preventing complications and sustaining long-term health.

Bariatric surgery has the potential to be life-changing and extremely beneficial but only when paired with healthy habits such as eating healthily and engaging in physical activity. When patients make these changes with the proper guidance, surgery can serve as a powerful foundation for long-term health rather than a temporary solution.

Aliza Beer is a registered dietitian with a master’s degree in nutrition. She has a private practice in Cedarhurst, NY. Patients’ success has been featured on the Dr. Oz show. Aliza can be reached at alizabeer@gmail.com, and you can follow her on Instagram at @alizabeer

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more pronounced after sleeve gastrectomy compared to gastric bypass.

Supporting these findings, a 10-year follow-up study by Felsenreich et al.

(2016) examined outcomes in 53 patients who underwent sleeve gastrectomy. While patients achieved substantial weight loss within the first year after surgery, more than half (59%) regained at least 10 kg from their lowest postoperative weight over the 10-year period. Additionally, over one-third of patients require conversion to another bariatric procedure, most commonly Roux-en-Y gastric bypass, due to significant weight regain or severe reflux.

Beyond the data, weight regain is something I routinely see when working with patients who are multiple years post-surgery. Many post-bariatric patients describe slowly falling back into bad old habits—frequent snacking, grazing throughout the day, reliance on high-calorie liquids, or eating in response to stress rather than hunger. Over time, stomach capacity increases, hunger cues return, and without intentional behavior change, weight regain can feel inevitable.

At this stage, some patients hope for another surgery to “fix” the problem, when in reality the missing piece is often nu-

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Health & F tness

The Fast and the Female Lessons from the Long-Overlooked Gender

By Sara Weissman

W

ith wilting toenails, sleep-deprivation-induced hallucinations, and a malfunctioning digestive system, Ann Trason made history in the 1985 American River 50 Miler, finishing ahead of every male competitor. Throughout her career, she dominated extreme distances and inspired a new generation of female ultrarunners. While elite men are about 10-12% faster than elite women in the marathon, the gap at distances over 50 kilometers (31 miles) shrinks to the point that women frequently win extreme distance races. Male or female, rich or poor, none of that seems to matter in ultrarunning, which has been called “the most democratic of sports.” The only true qualifier is physical and mental grit, as Ann Trason’s punishing experience is actually quite typical in ultrarunning.

“Fragile” is the last word that fits these women. Ironically, “fragile” was the generalization used to gatekeep women from running in the 20th century. My late grandmother insisted that running would reduce my fertility. What I thought was made up was actually the common medical consensus when she was young.

The 1924 issue of American Physical Education Review declared: “National or international competition is a menace to womanhood.”

These “old wives’ tales” controlled major policy decisions in women’s sports.

While women are now regularly running 300+ mile races, women were largely excluded until recently from running even a mile. In 1928, the longest distance a woman could compete in was 800 meters (about half a mile). In the following year’s Olympics, a false rumor spread that a woman collapsed. With the fragility of females falsely reaffirmed, women could no longer race distances greater than 200 meters in the Olympics until 1960.

“Women are not physiologically capable of running a marathon” was the response to Bobbi Gibb’s application to the 1966 Boston Marathon. Shrugging off the rejection, she ran without a bib and used

Runners trying to rip Kathrine Switzer’s bib off her in the marathon

a hoodie to obscure her gender. Running sneakers for women were not introduced until the late 1970s, so she improvised with Red Cross nursing shoes. She became the first woman to complete the Boston Marathon. She finished in 3 hours, 21 minutes, and 40 seconds, faster than two-thirds of the participating men.

Gibb blended in well enough that her breakthrough feat largely went unnoticed.

The next year, another woman’s attempt stole headlines, albeit accidentally. Kathrine Switzer slipped through the cracks to become the first woman to race the Boston Marathon as an official registrant. In 1967, she signed up using her initials, “K.V. Switzer” and had a man pick up the bib.

Like Gibb, she planned on disguising herself with a hoodie. However, at mile three, her hood slipped, revealing her gender to a gasping crowd of spectators. The race director ran to the scene, grabbed her by the shoulders, and attempted to rip off her bib.

Another runner jumped in and knocked the race director to the ground, allowing her to escape and complete the rest of the race. Photos of the attack drew media attention and spotlighted the absurdity of banning women from marathons.

In 1972, women were finally allowed to participate in the Boston Marathon, and the 1984 Los Angeles Olympics were the first to feature a women’s marathon. Ann Trason’s landmark win in the ultramarathon came in 1985. Ever since, female par-

ticipation in running has skyrocketed. In the 2024 TCS NYC Marathon, about 45% of participants were women. Anecdotally, I think everyone can agree that wherever there are runners, there are women. The current medical consensus is that running is generally just as beneficial for women as it is for men.

Even in our Orthodox Jewish community, where social change is often adopted slowly, a new wave of frum female runners is emerging. Beatie Deutsch, a frum mother of five, is a three-time Israeli National Marathon Champion with her sights on representing Israel in the Olympics. Seeing photos of her running in a skirt and tichel alongside elite Kenyan and Ethiopian runners seems almost comical. That is, until you realize, nothing’s holding back religious Jewish women from going pro.

Orthodox Jewish women face huge barriers to entry for most sports. School sports are limited, and local recreational leagues can play on Shabbos or have uniforms that conflict with a girl’s need for modesty. Things get even trickier if motherhood comes into the picture, with pregnancy, recovery, and time becoming obstacles. Instead of playing, we sit on the sidelines of competitive sports.

But running is different. You can become elite even if you run solo and wear modest sportswear. There are few obstacles in our way from getting serious about training.

Running is an inherently egalitarian sport. You don’t need expensive equipment, fancy fields, or clever coaches. Instead, some of the greatest runners grew up running barefoot in impoverished countries. As opposed to team-based sports, there is little danger in mixing participants of differing abilities. A world-class marathoner aiming to break two hours can race on the same course as a walker-runner just trying to go the distance. Perhaps this explains why the participation gap is shrinking so rapidly.

Fewer barriers to entry make the sport more inclusive.

The rapid progression of female running participation tells the larger story of why running is so special. Running has the power to connect people across age, gender, politics, race, culture, and religion. Any runner I cross paths with is instantly labeled a “friend” without a second thought. When I exchange a smile and a wave with another runner, the invisible wall between strangers immediately crumbles as we share a running micro-moment.

The pioneers of female running showed us that false ideas are barriers that can be overcome. Their pursuit for access has opened the roads to all of us and made the world a healthier, more inclusive place.

Changing the view on female running was a marathon, not a sprint, but women proved they had the endurance to go the distance and transform society along the way. Gibb and Switzer were just runners trying to get faster, but their aspirations inspired the world.

We all have it within us to go farther than we think.

Sara Weissman is a high school psychology teacher, biochemistry researcher, former adjunct professor of biology, and distance runner. Follow her running adventures on Strava @Sari Weissman. If you have feedback or suggestions for future articles, contact Sara at sara.lifshitz18@gmail.com.

School of

Thought

DECEMBER 25, 2025 | The Jewish Home

By Etti Siegel

Q:

Dear Etti, I need to vent about school projects – they’re getting completely out of hand! It seems like the parents are the ones doing the work, not the kids. Whether it’s the science fair, the Mishkan model, or even a simple book report, everything turns into a competition between mothers (and some fathers). You can tell right away which of the very few are “home-made” and which ones were “home-constructed.”

I don’t understand the point of assigning projects if the children aren’t actually doing them. What are teachers hoping to accomplish when half the class brings in picture-perfect displays that clearly came out of a parent’s late-night craft session? It’s discouraging for the kids who did their own work, and it sends a strange message about honesty, effort, and learning.

Can we please go back to projects that children can do themselves, without parents turning into glue-gun warriors?

Signed, - Glitter-adverse

A:

Dear Glitter-adverse, You are absolutely right! School projects have taken on a life of their own! The moment a science fair or book report is announced, glue guns warm up, cardboard castles appear, and suddenly, parents find themselves knee-deep in poster board, printouts, and panic. What began as a chance for children to explore and create has turned into a full-blown parental competition.

It’s easy to see how we got here. We all want our children to succeed. We want them to feel proud when they stand in front of their classmates and say, “This is my project.” But somewhere along the way, our pride and anxiety started eclipsing their learning. The beautifully laminated trifold boards might look impressive, but they often hide what’s missing underneath: authentic child effort.

When adults take over, we unintentionally rob children of the most valuable lessons projects were designed to teach: how to plan, organize, persevere through frustration, and solve problems creatively. A perfect model doesn’t build character; a wobbly volcano that erupts two minutes late does.

It’s not that parents shouldn’t care. It’s that caring shouldn’t mean controlling. Helping your child plan out the steps of a project, showing them how to research, or reminding them of due dates; those are great supports.

But hot-gluing the final draft or writing the captions for the display? That turns an opportunity for growth into a missed learning moment.

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we unintentionally send the message And research supports this. Keith that perfection matters more than Robinson, a sociology professor at When parents perseverance. the University of Texas at Austin, So yes, it’s time to retire the “parand Angel L. Harris, a sociology prohover too ent project.” Let’s replace it with fessor at Duke University, conducted closely, we authentic student learning: messy, the largest and most comprehensive uneven, but wonderfully real. The study ever on parental involvement unintentionally next time a science fair rolls around, and its impact on student achievelet’s proudly stand back and let our ment. After analyzing data from tens send the children shine, crooked volcanoes of thousands of families, they found message that and all. something surprising: most forms of intense parental involvement did not perfection improve academic performance, and Parent Guidelines: Helping matters in many cases, they actually made it Without Taking Over worse. When parents became too • Offer materials and encouragemore than hands-on with homework, projects, ment – but let your child design and perseverance. or assignments, students often lost build. motivation, confidence, and owner• Ask guiding questions instead ship of their learning. of giving answers. (“What could The takeaway is simple but powmake it stand up better?” “How erful: children learn best when they are supported, not might you test that?”) replaced. Our role as parents is to provide materials, en• Praise effort, not polish. couragement, and sometimes structure, but the thinking, • If it looks like an adult did it… it probably defeats writing, and designing should be theirs. It’s okay if the glue the purpose. is crooked, the paint smudged, or the handwriting uneven.

That’s how you know the child did it.

Teacher Tips: Designing Authentic Projects This conversation isn’t just for parents, though, it’s for • Whenever possible, complete projects in class or in schools, too. If teachers want authentic student work, they guided stages. may need to rethink how projects are assigned. Perhaps • Grade the process; research notes, drafts, reflections, more of them should be done in school, where teachers can not just the final product. guide the process and ensure that the child’s work reflects • Provide clear rubrics that emphasize creativity, indethe child’s abilities. Not every family has the time, tools, or pendence, and effort. skills to help equally, and at-home projects can widen gaps • Communicate expectations to parents: “This should between students. Completing projects in class levels the look like a child’s work!” playing field and allows teachers to assess real understandSo next time a “group project” seems to be taking over ing, not parental artistry. your dining room table and your life, take a deep breath Ultimately, a project’s value isn’t in the final display; and hand the reins back. You’re not depriving your child of it’s in the process. When children brainstorm, experiment, help; you’re giving them the gift of independence. and troubleshoot, they build skills that last far beyond a Warmly, single grade or subject. When parents hover too closely, - Etti

Mrs. Etti Siegel holds a MS in Teaching and Learning/Educational Leadership and brings sound teaching advice to her audiences culled from her over 35 years of teaching and administrative experience. Etti is an Adjunct at the College of Mount Saint Vincent/Sara Shenirer. She is a coach and educational consultant for Catapult Learning, FACTS Education Solutions, Brienza Academic Advantage, Yeled V’Yalda; is a sought-after mentor and workshop presenter around the country; and a popular presenter for Sayan (a teacher-mentoring program), Hidden Sparks, and the Consortium of Jewish Day Schools. She is a frequent contributor to Hamechanech magazine and The Journal for Jewish Day School Leaders and has a weekly column in The Jewish Home.

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The Jewish Home | DECEMBER 25, 2025

Parenting Pearls

Connecting with Older Children

By Sara Rayvych, MSEd

C

onnecting and bonding with our children is the foundation of parenting. While it won’t solve everything, so many problems can be avoided, and wounds healed, by a healthy parent-child bond.

This bonding starts from their earliest moments and continues into adulthood. In many ways, those early bonds are the foundation for parenting teenagers. It’s relatively easy to bond with an infant yet challenging to start with a teen. While an infant’s needs are constant, they are relatively simple and naturally connect us. Teens are harder to read and challenging to connect with. I can’t stress enough how having a healthy connection during the younger years will benefit parenting a teen.

Despite the crucial role of early bonding, we can’t stop there and assume all is well for life. Keeping a connection to our children needs to be constantly maintained and further developed as they grow. The bond deepens and changes as life does. Learning how

to continue this bond past the early years is an important part of parenting tweens and teens.

Physical Connection It’s a sad day for a parent when their child officially rejects hugs. The sweet toddler who threatened to choke us with their strangling grip around our necks now turns away. Those slobbery kisses become a thing of the past.

Children of all ages – teens included – need a physical connection with others. Ideally, parents would still show physical affection to their older children as they did when they were younger.

Sadly, that’s not always possible. We need to respect their boundaries for their bodies while still being mindful of keeping the connection strong.

Hugs and physical affection shouldn’t be forced on or guilted from a child, but parents still have options for hug-resistant kids. Pats on the back, arms around the shoulder and fistbumps are among the possible ways to

physically connect with a touch averse child. Gauging their comfort level and respecting their needs are good guidelines. It’s about the child’s needs and not those of the parent.

Communication, Communication, Communication It’s kind of like real estate because there is one main criteria that matters.

Older children can value communication even more than the younger crew. They have more advanced communication skills and will rely on verbal communication for most of their interpersonal relationships.

While some teens may not more than politely – or not so politely – grunt, that shouldn’t deter parents. Even grunters can appreciate being spoken to gently.

Older kids have busier lives and less time for their parents. They prioritize friends, school events and other outside activities, often leaving their parents feeling left out and no longer relevant. A parent’s role is no less important just be-

cause a child is busier outside their loving walls. We may even say that the kids who are at home with us less need time with us even more.

Building connection through communication doesn’t refer exclusively to long, emotional discussions. Often, most of our communication will be shorter, with seemingly meaningless phrases – but these add up. “I missed you.” “It’s great to see you.” “Have a great day in school.”

Doing this isn’t complicated, but it takes mindfulness. The time when children enter or leave our home is an important time to connect and reconnect with them.

We shouldn’t forget the role of non-verbal cues. Along with physical contact, we can smile, wave or find another way of showing how happy we are to see them. We can also use facial and body language to show sympathy or whatever emotion is appropriate.

We communicate non-verbally even when we don’t intend to, and it’s easy for children to misunderstand our intentions.

For example, we could be upset over some-

In all situations, we should think before speaking and be mindful of how our child will respond to our words.

I don’t consider digital communication a suitable replacement for in-person ones. While some people are OK “LOL”ing each other for hours, that’s not parenting.

We need eye contact and physical presence in their life. This doesn’t mean we

around themselves and look towards independence. The little one who used to hang onto our clothes starts to separate and become self-sufficient. It’s emotionally mixed for parents. Those late night feedings are over, but we feel as if we’re slowly losing our relevance in their life. It helps to remember that our role is no less important, even if it’s now different. We need to re-

A parent’s role is no less important just because a child is busier outside their loving walls.

can’t harness some of the benefits of the technology around us. While I’m a fan of paper notes strategically placed in bags or on desks, texting is also a great way to let our kids know we’re thinking of them. A quick note or text can let them know we care and love them even when they’re not standing next to us.

Building Walls As kids grow, they begin to build walls

spect their boundaries, but they still need us more than they can possibly recognize.

Learning how to navigate the rules behind this new relationship can be tricky.

We need to find a healthy balance between their need to develop and grow into their adult self, while maintaining our presence and guidance.

They will have their own way of wanting to do things and a different view from ours. We may like our way best, but when-

ever possible, we can let them try things on their own. Showing we trust them and respect their thoughts communicates how much we value them. This often comes up with hobbies, clothes and other forms of self-expression. This is referring to areas that are personal taste and not family standards. When it comes to family standards, the question is more tricky and beyond the scope of this article.

It may feel like we are being pushed away from our kids, but in many ways, we can deepen and develop the relationship as we begin to connect with them on a more adult level. As much as parenting is always changing, in many ways, it’s still the same. It’s a challenge to continuously adjust to meet our child’s developing needs, but it’s a pleasure to see our little one grow and become the person they’re meant to be.

Sara Rayvych, MSEd, holds a master’s degree in general and special education. She has been homeschooling for over 15 years. Sara provides personalized parent mentoring services, addressing a variety of general and specific parenting concerns. She can be contacted at Sara.Rayvych@gmail.com with comments, questions or for private consultations.

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thing that happened before they came home but misinterpret our frustration as being directed towards them.

It’s better to use open-ended questions when trying to build the bridges of communication. Open-ended questions are those which require more than a one word response. “Tell me about the trip.” “What are your plans for Shabbos afternoon?”

These questions encourage a real, meaningful response. If given the choice, many kids would answer every question with “yes,” “no,” “maybe,” or a shrug. “How was school?” “Fine.” How did your math test go?” “OK.” Even more frustrating is the famous “nothing.” That one word answer is virtually meaningless. It’s not that oneword response questions have no value, but at least some of our conversation openers should be open-ended.

Hard discussions come up. It’s healthy, normal, and something we’d welcome if it wasn’t so uncomfortable for us. We don’t have to have all the answers, nor do we have to feel comfortable throughout the discussion, but we can’t ignore their questions. At times, we may need to bring up topics that are difficult or confusing. Just knowing we’re available and willing to have these discussions is important for a growing child’s security.

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Shmooze & Muse

I Stomach New Jersey

By Mordechai Schmutter

I

f you’re thinking of moving out of New York right now for whatever reason, here’s a thought: Why not New Jersey?

OK, I can tell you why not New Jersey.

As someone who grew up in New York but moved out to New Jersey 21 years ago (I’m always ahead of the trends), I feel like I’m in a unique position to help guide you with your move. I’m not doing a whole Nefesh B’Nefesh thing here, helping people move to New Jersey, but I mean at least as far as telling you what to expect that might be different in New Jersey.

There aren’t as many differences as you’d think, because almost everyone in New Jersey is originally from New York.

First of all, you should know up front that it costs nothing to cross a bridge into New Jersey, but you have to pay to leave.

That’s why a lot of us are still here.

And not everything is different. For example, we have buses, some of which go straight to New York! Though you never know when or if the bus will come. We also have off-brand buses that go to exactly the same places for 50 cents less, and they can afford to charge less because they don’t have shocks.

We also have trees! Not as many trees as some other states, but I mean, ease yourselves in.

And speaking of easing yourselves in, New Jersey is said to be the most densely-populated state. Sure, New York City is also pretty densely populated. But as a state, it averages out. If you drive through New York State end to end, you’ll find that the six hours it takes you to drive through the rest of the state is significantly less dense than the six hours it takes you to drive through the city. Point is, New Jersey is a nice stepping-stone for people who would like to leave New York but still enjoy crowds.

If you live in New Jersey, you like that the city is right there, in case you ever need it, but you don’t want to go into the city for anything. In fact, once you move, you find that you don’t want to go anywhere where you know there’s going to be traffic. You’ll wait until sometime that there’s no traffic. So you spend a lot of time at home. Whereas in New York City, you spend a lot of time out of the home, waiting in lines. In New York, you can sit in traffic just circling the block to look for parking. And half the traffic is people backing into parking spaces. In New Jersey, you learn which highways are crowded in which direction at what times. I live pretty close to MetLife Stadium, and while we have a siyum there

every seven years, the non-Jews apparently have them way more often. Or maybe they’re just playing games there; I don’t know. So you have to keep on top of when there’s going to be stuff going on in the stadium, just so you can anticipate traffic of angry people sitting in line to be able to stand in line to sit in a crowd with all of those same people and then angrily sit in line with those same people again on the way out. But we like that we can see the city, so we can keep an eye on it in case anything happens.

We have cities, too! We have Newark, which is something most New Yorkers don’t know about. They think we’re just mispronouncing New York. No one really goes there, though, because that’s where we keep the traffic. And the airport. And most of the people who sell food at red lights.

New Jersey has more property crime than New York but less violent crime. So it depends what you’re into. And it depends what the crime is, probably, because some of the laws are different from state to state.

Especially the weird laws.

For example, it’s officially illegal to honk your horn in New York City unless someone’s life is in danger. (The reason people do it anyway is that if you’re slowing them down, your life is in danger.)

Also, according to some sources, it might be illegal in New York to walk around with ice cream in your pocket on Sundays. I actually think that’s a typo, and they meant to write “sunny days.” But if you wanted to do that, you would have had to move by this point anyway. The only situation that I can see myself doing that is if I take ice cream and I don’t want my kids to know, so I’m eating it in some corner of the house, and the kids suddenly walk in.

And then I have to take them somewhere and don’t have a chance to remove it.

Point is, if you move out of New York, you won’t have to deal with these laws anymore. But New Jersey has its own stuff.

For example, double parking is illegal in New Jersey.

Also, in New Jersey, it’s illegal for car dealerships to be open on Sundays. Not even for test drives. I think this might have something to do with the lack of a law prohibiting having ice cream in your pocket.

And actually, in Bergen County, it’s illegal to sell any “non-essential goods” on Sundays, such as furniture, major electronics, and clothing. So if nothing else, you might want to live somewhere where clothing is considered essential.

Also, in New Jersey, it is forbidden to pump your own gas. You need a profes-

on a closed course, usually on DMV property, and with no other cars around. The hardest part of the test is where you have to parallel park between two traffic cones, which I guess is essential because traffic cones are everywhere in New Jersey. This is unlike New York, where the tests take place on the busiest, narrowest, curviest

students about why they need to know each and every lesson individually when he can’t just shrug and say, “Regents.”

New Jersey is about the size of Eretz Yisroel. What other state is ever mentioned regularly in the same sentence as Eretz Yisroel? We even have our own Ir Hakodesh!

See, the problem with living somewhere where everyone is nice is that you have to be nice, too.

road that the DMV can find, during a marathon, and then you have to parallel park on the left side of the road between two food trucks in a space that is smaller than your car, and the instructor refuses to get out and help. Also, New Jersey driving-test proctors tend to live longer.

There are also no Regents exams in New Jersey, which means that every student’s education is entirely dependent on how much each teacher cares about his job and how long he is willing to argue with

People who don’t live in Jersey will say, “Oh, you live in Joisey?” and then look at you like they think that you must think they are really clever. Fun fact: I’ve been living in Jersey for 21 years and have never heard anyone who lives here say, “Joisey.” If anything, Joisey is how you would say it in an old-timey Brooklyn accent. They’re making fun of Brooklyn! They have some noive.

OK, so some of the things in this list are not specific to New Jersey. But if you

want to live in a place with basically the same weather as New York and decent bagels and where everyone is just as rude rushed, New Jersey is the place for you.

See, the problem with living somewhere where everyone is nice is that you have to be nice, too. Only you can know if you’re ready for that. So if you’re not looking to change, I would suggest not moving that far.

EXCEPTION: In New Jersey, if someone says, “Good Shabbos,” etiquette dictates that you say “Good Shabbos” back.

EVEN IF YOU DON’T KNOW THEM. It doesn’t mean that you agree with all their shittos or that you’d be meshadech with them. You just do it anyway. It’s annoying, especially when you’re in middle of whatever deep thoughts you’re thinking on the way to shul.

(If you don’t respond, I always assume you’re catching up on davening.)

But don’t like shmooze or anything. It’s not Baltimore.

Mordechai Schmutter is a freelance writer and a humor columnist for Hamodia and other magazines. He has also published eight books and does stand-up comedy. He can be contacted at mschmutter@gmail.com.

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sional who didn’t do well in grade school and who is also never in a rush. To be honest, I don’t even like pumping my own gas. I’m not going to go to New York so I can do it myself and also pay more to do so, by the way. This is not like apple picking. (“Hey, kids! Guess what we’re doing for Chol Hamoed!”) This law has been on the books since 1949, when I guess letting random Joes pump their own gas was considered dangerous, because back then, it wasn’t just like you push some squares on a screen. Pumping gas probably involved like a bike pump or something. My shaylah is that if you’re a gas station attendant and you go to another gas station, are you allowed to do it then? Is it a din in the gas station or on the attendant? What about at your own gas station? Is it OK then, or do you still have to get someone else to do it, like dental work?

On many roadways in New Jersey, you’re not allowed to turn left. You have to use a jughandle. Jughandles are how you turn left without turning left, by turning right and going around a loop while leaning, and then waiting for the light going the other way. And it only takes like four minutes!

The driving tests are considerably easier in New Jersey, where they take place

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F

d for Thought

Sheinkin

By Nati Burnside

T

he first thing you have to know when you walk into Sheinkin is that it’s a friends and family operation.

Avia Mazaki and his friend Shimon Marzel moved to America from Israel two years ago. Avia’s brother, Dvir, had been in America since 2017. The three of them decided to get together and start Sheinkin, a restaurant with a specific focus.

Named after Menachem Sheinkin, one of the founders of Tel Aviv, the restaurant would be a little different from other places.

“We wanted to bring the vibe of a Tel Aviv restaurant,” Avia said about their place. “A modern, clean design, great music, food that comes out of the kitchen quickly, everything fresh and prepared daily, and the best possible atmosphere.”

With Dvir running the kitchen as the chef he was always meant to be, the trio was ready to get their dream off the ground.

When I was invited to Sheinkin, the first thing I wanted to do was get some food on the table. I ordered the classics, and they did not disappoint in any way. For your own good, don’t sit down in Sheinkin without ordering the following trio: Falafel, Beef Moroccan Cigars, and Prime Ground Beef Hummus.

First, let’s address the falafel. These are some real top tier balls. Dark green on the inside from a great herb blend, super crispy on the outside for a nice crunch, without the outside layer being so thick as to overshadow the beautiful inside… these are perfect. They come with some tahini and amba, but you can certainly eat them on their own if you like.

Then there are the cigars. The duo I got was obviously crafted with care as they were expertly rolled in a very thin and crisp, almost tempura-like coating. The plate was rounded out with some pickled veggies and a little bit of tahini with harissa. Much like the falafel, you can utilize what’s on the plate or eat them on their own. Either way, the cigars are going to be a highlight of your meal.

But the real key here is the hummus.

Because while you certainly could eat the falafel and cigars on their own or with what comes on their respective plates, the much better option is to dip them in some of this fabulous hummus. Smooth and creamy with a delightful taste of Israel, the hummus at Sheinkin won’t let you down.

Topped with olive oil, pine nuts, and a little bit of green charif to go along with the obvious beef in the middle, you could probably just eat bowls of this (alongside the pita that comes with it) and be happy. There’s plenty of meat in the bowl for you to scoop up with your wonderful warm pita, and there will be enough hummus leftover to satisfy the needs of both the falafel and the cigars.

If you’ve listened to me so far, you’ve had an amazing start to your meal. But even though a large part of this type of food is the bread and the dip and everything that comes first, you can’t forget the main course.

Just before that, though, I want to make sure you try the Tel Avivian Ceviche. Think of this small raw fish course as almost a palate cleanser as the flavors are very different from our other selections. This salmon ceviche is made with a leche de tigre of coconut, lime, and mango. There’s some avocado mixed in there as a base and bits of cilantro as a garnish, but the standout flavor actually comes from the pairing of both black and regular sesame seeds. At this point, I’ve had plenty of types of ceviche and whatever fruit and acid you want to use to make it will probably taste good assuming you know what you are doing. But coming over the top of some strong flavors like mango with sesame? That takes some guts, and it pays off. The result is not only unique but also certainly draws you back to where the restaurant wants you to be.

For the first of my recommendations for a main course, I’ll offer up the Arayes. I know what you’re gonna say. Arayes aren’t a main course. And you might be right about that. But I also know that you can order this

as an appetizer if you want and split it with the rest of your party. The real advantage to calling it an entrée is that you get to keep them all for yourself. If that appeals to you, I rest my case. Anyway, these are your classic four-pack of pita quarters stuffed with a lamb/beef mixture and grilled until almost burnt. The advantage of it being a main course is that it comes with a side salad or fries (I’d recommend the fries).

But it also comes with a cup of tahini with some amba drizzled on top. If you dip the arayes into this cup and take a bite, your brain may just melt as the combination of crunchy pita, fattiness of the lamb, flavor of the beef, creaminess of the tahini, and kick of the amba hit your nervous system all at once. Like I said, you have the option of keeping all of this to yourself.

My last offering is one that almost no-

body asks to share, and that’s the Wagyu Burger. Anybody who reads this column knows that I’m really not a burger-innon-burger-place kinda guy. But I had so many people telling me to get this burger that I pulled the trigger and never regretted it for a second. What can I say? It was super juicy, flavorful, the house sauce was a nice creamy addition, the classic lettuce, tomato, and onion was accompanied by some Israeli pickle as a nice touch… it was a memorable burger.

Sheinkin is a memorable restaurant.

The Tel Avivian flavors and atmosphere are a nice change of pace from many of the other restaurants in the genre. If there’s one thing that you can say for sure, it’s that going there gives you a sense of Israel.

Whether it’s the food, the vibe, or just the way the partners foster a sense of family, it feels a little like home.

And home is something everybody needs.

Meat - Tel Avivian - Waiter Service

1415 Palisade Avenue, Teaneck, NJ 07666 551-237-4743 SheinkinKitchen.com RCBC (Rabbinical Council of Bergen County)

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In The K tchen

S’mores Mug Cake Pareve / Yields 1 serving

Ingredients

◦ 3½ Tablespoons flour

MI rI aM Pa SC al

Whip up a sweet treat in minutes with this easy mug cake recipe! Perfect for when you’re craving cake but don’t want the hassle of baking a whole one, this single-serve dessert comes together with simple ingredients and a microwave. Just mix, heat, and enjoy a warm, fluffy cake straight from the mug— no oven, no mess, and no waiting.

Cohe n

By Naomi Nachman

PhoT o Cr edIT

The Jewish Home | DECEMBER 25, 2025

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Preparation 1.

In a large, wide microwaveable mug, use a fork to combine flour, cocoa, sugar,

◦ 1½ Tablespoons cocoa

baking powder and salt.

◦ 2 Tablespoons sugar ◦ Pinch kosher salt

2. Stir in oil, milk, and vanilla; mix until smooth and no lumps remain.

3. Stir in graham crackers and marshmallows.

4. Microwave for 90-120 seconds, depending on the strength of your microwave.

◦ 2½ Tablespoons oil

Cool slightly; eat while still warm.

◦ ¼ teaspoon baking powder

◦ ¼ cup milk ◦ ¼ teaspoon vanilla extract ◦ 2 Tablespoons coarsely crushed graham crackers ◦ 1-2 Tablespoons mini marshmallows

Naomi Nachman, the owner of The Aussie Gourmet, caters weekly and Shabbat/ Yom Tov meals for families and individuals within The Five Towns and neighboring communities, with a specialty in Pesach catering. Naomi is a contributing editor to this paper and also produces and hosts her own weekly radio show on the Nachum Segal Network stream called “A Table for Two with Naomi Nachman.” Naomi gives cooking presentations for organizations and private groups throughout the New York/New Jersey Metropolitan area. In addition, Naomi has been a guest host on the QVC TV network and has been featured in cookbooks, magazines as well as other media covering topics related to cuisine preparation and personal chefs. To obtain additional recipes, join The Aussie Gourmet on Facebook or visit Naomi’s blog. Naomi can be reached through her website, www.theaussiegourmet.com or at (516) 295-9669.

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Notable Quotes “Say What?!”

If JD Vance runs for president, he’s going to be our nominee, and I’ll be one of the first people to support him.

- Sec. of State Marco Rubio in a recent interview

We cover it all the time on my show. All the time.

And I think that is to a large degree because we saw what happened with Biden. And while we covered it, we didn’t cover it — maybe we didn’t ask as many questions as we should have at the time. And I think it is a legitimate question for any president of any age, but particularly anybody who is like in the range of being an octogenarian, right?

– CNN’s Jake Tapper in the ultimate gaslight, claiming that the reason he talks so much about Trump’s age is because he failed to investigate Biden’s age issues (and actually publicly shamed those who questioned Biden’s abilities)

Put them [Hamas] on the clock. If they don’t disarm in a credible way, then unleash Israel on ‘em.

I refuse to allow U.S. cities to become Somalia 2.0. If Ilhan Omar and her colleagues love Somalia so much, we’ll buy you a one-way ticket.

- Senator Lindsey Graham (R-SC) talking to the Times of Israel that Hamas must disarm

– Sen. Tommy Tuberville (R-AL)

If Israel wanted to kill all the Palestinians, they could. Hamas wants to kill all the Israelis, they can’t. Hezbollah would kill everybody in Israel if they could. Nobody in Israel wants to kill everybody in Lebanon.

- ibid.

The minute you mention antisemitism, you lose the game. Because someone will rush to appoint a task force, the task force will invite philosophers, the philosophers will climb Mt. Olympus, and you’ve lost 10 years of philosophical discussion in which nothing is being done.

Antisemitism thus becomes a license for inaction — if not worse.

- Judea Pearl, professor of computer science at the University of California whose son, Wall Street Journal reporter Daniel Pearl, was kidnapped and murdered in Pakistan while reporting on religious extremist groups in the wake of the 9/11 attacks, in an interview with The Times of Israel

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That’s the third time he’s called me a clown.

Look, everyone that watches his interviews and sees how he tries to imitate Obama, they wonder why he’s got the nickname Dollar Store Obama.

-Rep. James Comer (R-KY) after Minority Leader Hakeem Jeffries called him a clown for investigating Somali fraud

Look, he’s a low-IQ individual who has to resort to name-calling; that’s what he criticizes Donald Trump over. I don’t care what he calls me. He can come to Kentucky and campaign against me. I’ll pay for his gas bill.

- ibid.

I’m going to be honest. I don’t feel good about being white every day for a lot of reasons, because it’s a point of privilege that I get to move through the world in a way that so many of my other colleagues and friends and family members in the community don’t get the privilege to do.

- Kentucky state senator Rep. Sarah Stalker at a state hearing on DEI

She’s a liar. She doesn’t feel bad about being white; she feels like a savior telling the black folks that she is not like them other white rubes and then she soaks in her own self-admiration.

She is just trying to build herself up by virtue signaling.

– Greg Gutfeld commenting on Stalker

TPUSA attendees are the heart of our movement — the tip of the GOP spear — representing our boots-on-the-ground activists, supporters, and MAGA foot soldiers. And 86.7% of them say Israel is an American ally — with 1 out of 3 saying it’s America’s greatest ally. That’s a landslide victory!

Only about one in 10 are anti-Israel. Which means, if this were REALLY a “MAGA civil war,” the anti-Israel side would be outnumbered by roughly 10 to one. That’s no civil war! It’d be like a nail declaring war on a hammer!

- Scott Pinsker, PJ Media

So what … is going on?! The answer, I suspect, is that Tucker Carlson has worked in media for a very long time. He’s been a writer, an on-air talent, and the owner of media companies. Which means, he’s a PR pro, too. And he’s a great one, because he fully understands his own profit model: He needs clicks, controversy — and above all else, attention — to maximize his revenue. Goading Ben Shapiro into responding the way he did will make Tucker a lot of money.

- ibid.

Have you ever noticed that fast food restaurants tend to choose locations near other fast food restaurants? I’ll bet you know streets in your city with a McDonald’s, Burger King, and even a (gasp!) Arby’s side-by-side. You know why they’re there? ‘Cause that’s where the money is! It’s the same deal in the podcast business: If Carlson discovered a schtick that works, others are gonna copy it. The same way Carlson copied the schtick of Nick Fuentes and Candace Owens. Never forget: “The answer to all your questions is money.”

- ibid.

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- Treasury Secretary Scott Bessent on Fox News responding to an incident in a restaurant in which a Code Pink protester got up and tried to shame him for being in the Trump administration

I wasn’t that sad to be interrupted because the food wasn’t very good at the restaurant, and it was also clear that the restaurant owner was in on it with her. It was a setup.

- ibid.

We are going to get my husband’s friend, J.D. Vance, elected for 48 in the most resounding way possible.

- Turning Point USA CEO Erika Kirk at AmericaFest 2025 endorsing J.D. Vance for the 2028 presidential race

There won’t be any operations if you treat us with respect, if you respect our interests just as we’ve always tried to respect yours.

- Russian Pres. Vladimir Putin addressing Europe in his end-of-the-year press conference

In America, you don’t have to apologize for being white anymore. And if you’re an Asian, you don’t have to talk around your skin color when you’re applying to college. Because we judge people based on who they are, not on ethnicity and things they can’t control.

- Vice Pres. J.D. Vance at Turning Point USA’s AmericaFest 2025

DECEMBER 25, 2025 | The Jewish Home

They were booing that deranged woman, who clearly, her dad didn’t pat her on the head enough when she was younger. So now, the rest of us have to live with this.

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Political Crossfire

The Outlines of a Sustainable Ukraine Peace Deal Inch Into View

By David Ignatius

H

ere’s a simple description of what peace should look like in Ukraine: a sovereign nation, its borders protected by international security guarantees, that is part of the European Union and rebuilding its economy with big investments from the United States and Europe.

For all President Donald Trump’s hardball negotiating tactics, and his inexplicable sympathy for the Russian aggressor, such a deal seems to be getting closer, according to what I’m hearing from American, Ukrainian and European officials.

Trump could still blow it by squeezing President Volodymyr Zelensky and his European supporters so hard they choose to fight on despite the awful cost.

That would be bad for everyone. This is a moment for Trump to reassure Ukraine and Europe, not try to bludgeon them into a settlement.

Trump’s tilt toward the Kremlin in the National Security Strategy released by the White House last week has complicated negotiations. He seems to want to stand equidistant between a democratic

Europe and an autocratic Russia, “to mitigate the risk of conflict between Russia and European states,” the document says.

That evenhandedness between friend and foe makes no sense, strategically or morally - and it genuinely worries Europe.

Despite this shaky foundation, the Trump peace effort has some promise.

U.S. negotiators Jared Kushner and Steve Witkoff are business tycoons, not diplomats. But they seem to recognize that the best protection for Ukraine is a combination of binding security guarantees and future economic prosperity. And they know the package will fail unless Zelensky can sell it to a brave but exhausted country.

The negotiating package involves three documents, a Ukrainian official told me: the peace plan, security guarantees and an economic recovery plan. The talks are far from over, with Ukraine and European supporters planning to release a joint set of amendments Wednesday. But here are some of the ideas being explored, as described to me this week by U.S. and Ukrainian officials: - Ukraine would join the European

Union as early as 2027. This rapid accession worries some E.U. powers. But the Trump administration thinks it can overcome opposition from Hungary, which has been Kyiv’s biggest E.U. opponent.

Membership would foster trade and investment. But perhaps most important, it would force Ukraine to control its pernicious culture of corruption in stateowned businesses.

At bottom, this war has been about whether Ukraine can become a European country. President Vladimir Putin detests that idea, with his mystical belief in the oneness of Russia and Ukraine. Quick E.U. membership for Kyiv looks to me like victory.

- The United States would provide what are described as “Article 5-like” security guarantees to protect Ukraine if Russia violates the pact. Ukraine wants the U.S. to sign such an agreement and have Congress ratify it; European nations would sign separate security guarantees.

A U.S.-Ukrainian working group is exploring how the details would work – and how fast Ukraine and its allies could respond to any Russian breach.

The reliability of the U.S. guarantees is arguably undermined by language in the National Security Strategy that seems to erode the NATO alliance, on which the guarantees are modeled. But the Trump team says it’s committed to continuing U.S. intelligence support for Ukraine, which is the sine qua non of security.

- Ukraine’s sovereignty would be protected from any Russian veto. But negotiators still seem to be struggling with delicate issues like limits on Ukraine’s army.

There’s talk of raising an initial U.S. proposal for a 600,000-soldier army to 800,000, which is roughly what Ukraine would have anyway, postwar. But Kyiv refuses any formal constitutional cap, as Russia wants. Whatever the nominal size of the army, officials say there might be supplements like the national guard or other support forces.

- A demilitarized zone would be established along the entire ceasefire line, all the way from the Donetsk province in the northeast to the cities of Zaporizhzhia and Kherson in the south. Behind this DMZ would be a deeper zone in which heavy weapons would be excluded. This

ficials because it would provide an American tripwire against Russian aggression.

- The Trump administration would seek to foster investment and economic development in Ukraine. One source of funds would be the more than $200 bil-

struction would be U.S. investment.

U.S. officials are talking with Larry Fink, chief executive of the financial giant BlackRock, about reviving its plan for a Ukraine Development Fund that would attract $400 billion for reconstruction.

Trump negotiators should work with European allies to create a package of security guarantees and economic incentives that’s attractive enough that Ukrainians would be willing to swallow the bitter pill of giving up the slice of Donetsk that Russia has failed to conquer.

lion in Russian assets now frozen in Europe. Trump’s negotiators already proposed making $100 billion of that stash available to Ukraine for reparations. The amount might be increased.

A more durable engine for recon-

The World Bank would also be involved.

Trump, to be sure, wants similar investment and reconstruction initiatives for Russia. The premise for Kushner and Witkoff, both devout capitalists, is that countries that trade and prosper don’t

make war. The rise of Nazi Germany in the 1930s confounds that optimism, as does the growing menace of China today.

But it’s still a reasonable formula.

Rather than trying to squeeze Zelensky into a deal, the Trump negotiators should work with European allies to create a package of security guarantees and economic incentives that’s attractive enough that Ukrainians would be willing to swallow the bitter pill of giving up the slice of Donetsk that Russia has failed to conquer. Otherwise, Ukrainians will keep fighting.

The biggest mistake Trump can make is to insist that it’s now or never. Diplomacy doesn’t work that way, and good business doesn’t, either. As Trump observed several decades ago, “The worst thing you can possibly do in a deal is seem desperate to make it. That makes the other guy smell blood, and then you’re dead.”

Trump should make a reasonable deal that will last. Otherwise, he might end up with nothing, and this miserable conflict could enter an even more destructive phase. © 2025, Washington Post Writers Group

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line would be closely monitored, much like the DMZ that divides North and South Korea.

- “Land swaps” are an inescapable part of the deal, but Ukraine and the U.S. are still haggling over how the lines would be drawn. Russia demands Ukraine give up the roughly 25 percent of Donetsk it still holds; the Trump team argues that Ukraine is likely to lose much of that in battle over the next six months, in any event, and should make concessions now to spare casualties.

U.S. negotiators have tried various formulas to make this concession more palatable for Zelensky. One idea is that the withdrawal zone would be demilitarized. Zelensky insisted Monday that he has “no legal right” to cede territory to Russia. One way to finesse this issue is the Korea model – to this day, South Korea claims a legal right to the entire peninsula and North Korea asserts the same.

- The Zaporizhzhia nuclear power plant, the largest in Europe, would no longer be under Russian occupation. Negotiators are discussing the possibility that the United States might take over running the facility. Strange as it may sound, that appeals to some Ukrainian of-

The Jewish Home | DECEMBER 25, 2025

118

Political Crossfire

Like the Left, the Conservative Big Tent Won’t Exclude Antisemites

By Jonathan S. Tobin

P

erhaps at a different moment in time, the headlines about Vice President JD Vance’s concluding speech at the Turning Point USA AmericaFest conference last weekend in Phoenix, Ariz., would have centered on his avowal that “we have been, and by the grace of G-d, we always will be, a Christian nation.”

But that wasn’t the case.

Not even the most critical liberal outlets like The New York Times or The Washington Post, both of which could be expected to trash anything he said, led their coverage with reporting about that aspect of his remarks. Perhaps readers were outraged about him using the phrase “Christian nation”; still, however off-putting it may be for many Jews, I don’t feel that’s a threat to minority religious groups. Either way, the media outlets were right to highlight something else.

WrestleMania with Podcasters That’s because the truly significant aspect of the vice president’s address wasn’t about elements of its core, in which he spoke about his beliefs on conservative, religious and family values, and the flawed, amoral vision of the political left that he opposes. Important though that was, the headlines got it right. The most newsworthy aspect concerned his belief that the conservative coalition that he and President Donald Trump lead is one that should draw no lines in the sand about antisemitism or any other form of pathological extremism.

And that is something that should worry not just Jewish Republicans or conservatives, but everyone who cares about the future of America.

The context was crucial. Until

Vance’s remarks closed out the conference, the TPUSA event was, as columnist Jim Geraghty put it, “WrestleMania with podcasters.”

Rather than a fake show with cartoonish good guys and villains, it was a contest in which advocates, like commentator Ben Shapiro, for a conservative movement that set boundaries to exclude hate-mongers and Jew-baiters, were arrayed against their opponents. Shapiro was given his say in one session. But the following day, former Fox News host Tucker Carlson, who now articulates anti-Jewish tropes and platforms internet stars like the neo-Nazi “groyper” Nick Fuentes and other Holocaust deniers, was allowed to answer him.

Political commentator Megyn Kelly also had her time in the spotlight when she, too, criticized Shapiro. Kelly refused to go along with any approach that might set some limits or boundaries on discourse within mainstream conservatism,

such as those that might consign mad conspiracy theorists and antisemites like Candace Owens to the fever swamps of either the far right or far left. She seemed genuinely outraged by the notion that thought leaders should be judgmental about such voices, rather than treating them as having just as much validity as those of less insane people.

No Gatekeeping That opposition to “gatekeeping” under any circumstances was in no small measure a reaction to efforts of leftists to silence any opposition to radical ideas about race. That includes those in the Black Lives Matter movement, as well as the Biden administration’s effort to collude with Silicon Valley oligarchs to censor critics of its COVID-19 practices and other policies.

Nor are confrontations new at TPUSA. The assassination of its late founder, Charlie Kirk, in September cast a pall on

a conservative movement that often convened debates about the issues, including those concerning Israel.

But in the months since his death, Kirk’s belief in giving a hearing to divergent views and opposing censorship has been twisted into something else entirely. Largely because of the furor that followed Carlson’s hosting of Fuentes, the right is now expected to accept a new standard. Open racism, antisemitism and Holocaust denial, as well as even the most maniacal conspiracy theories about Kirk’s death, mixed in with traditional tropes of Jew-hatred, are now considered open for debate. The vilest ideas are being presented as something conservatives should agree to disagree about rather than reject out of hand.

If scoring was involved in this setto—as if it were a debate between serious persons—Shapiro won hands down. His evisceration of both Carlson and Kelly was masterly. He termed the former’s chummy interview of Fuentes as “an act of moral imbecility” and called out the latter’s hypocrisy and cynicism. Moreover, Carlson’s decision to not merely feebly answer Shapiro’s critique but to also harp on his belief that conservatives are too harsh on Islamists, like his pals in Qatar and other Muslim Brotherhood-based supporters of Hamas terrorists, went over like a lead balloon to the live audience, which responded with silence.

Yet any thought that Shapiro’s rational point of view might prevail at TPUSA were dispelled by Vance’s speech.

Vance Picks a Side Faced with a serious, growing breach within the coalition that elected Trump last year and which he hopes will enable him to succeed to the presidency in

A Deliberate Choice In Phoenix, he had a chance to distinguish his national conservative vision from the views of Fuentes and Carlson, who seem to have a lot more in common with left-wing antisemites and anti-Zionists like New York City mayor-elect

Zohran Mamdani than with Trump or other conservatives these days.

It wouldn’t have taken much to do so.

He could have easily added a throwaway line about opposing Jew-hatred in all forms without changing any other element in the address. In his list of the administration’s core agenda and accomplishments, he could have also merely mentioned the importance of the U.S.-Israel alliance to the president’s “America First” foreign policy, as he did in a speech last year, even if it was only in the context of boasting of its success in dealing a blow to Iran’s nuclear threat in June.

But he didn’t. And there’s no avoiding the conclusion that such language was deliberately omitted.

able with advocates of gender ideology that would allow biological males to use women’s bathrooms, compete against girls in sports, or permit the chemical castration or life-altering surgeries on children and teenagers. Nor would they cheerfully line up alongside supporters of abortion, open borders, or the policies of criminal-friendly prosecutors who have been elected with the help of leftist philanthropist George Soros.

Those are boundaries that they believe in. They just don’t think the same sort of lines should be drawn to exclude Jew-haters and people who support the elimination of the one Jewish state on the planet or the genocide of its people.

And that’s a Republican coalition in which no Jewish or non-Jewish conser-

The vilest ideas are being presented as something conservatives should agree to disagree about rather than reject out of hand.

That reflects a belief on his part about who should be inside the GOP’s big tent. It seems to include those on the far right who cheer Carlson’s cheerful platforming of anyone willing to bash or lie about Israel or deny the Holocaust, regard mad theories put forth by Owens as catnip to their conspiratorial appetites, or even regard Fuentes’s neo-Nazi bad boy act as mirroring their own insecurities and prejudices.

Such people may not reflect Vance’s own personal beliefs, which revolve around a vision of faith and identity that contains some serious truths about the need for America to reject the toxic vision of the political left. But by passing on a golden opportunity to draw a line in the sand between his ideas and those of right-wingers who share the left’s hatred for Jews, he’s telling us that he wants their votes.

They Don’t Welcome Everybody Let’s be clear that the braying of Carlson and Kelly about the evils of gatekeeping is patently insincere. Neither one of them—or Vance, for that matter—would welcome anyone into the conservative tent who supported the woke catechism of diversity, equity and inclusion. Nor would they be comfort-

vative who opposes antisemitism can ever truly feel at home.

The same cannot be said for his rhetoric about America as a “Christian nation.” As he explained in his TPUSA speech, acknowledging that America’s secular political tradition has its roots in the country’s religious faith does not exclude non-Christians. Western civilization is under assault from the political left, and defending it means standing up for the Judeo-Christian heritage that is its foundation.

Failing the Western Tradition While secular Jewish liberals feel threatened by any public expression of faith, they are wrong to see it as a danger to Jewish life. To the contrary, it is the left’s new secular woke religion—as we have seen in the two years since the Hamas-led terrorist attacks in southern Israel on Oct. 7, 2023—that is the primary contemporary engine of antisemitism.

But by not seeking to exclude those on the right that are mimicking the Jew-hatred of the left, Vance is failing not just the Jews but the cause of the West that is so dear to him.

Will there be political consequences for taking such a position?

One would think that a Republican Party that can’t appeal to the political

center, which abhors extremism, would be hard put to repeat Trump’s 2024 success in 2028. Conservatives thrived in the past when they came together behind a creed that was called “fusionism,” in which disparate factions that reflected diverse ideas about economics and foreign policy rallied behind whoever was, in William F. Buckley’s classic take, “the most electable conservative” available. But that approach clearly excluded extremists and antisemites—something that Buckley, the writer and publisher who more or less founded modern American conservatism, made sure of.

Don’t Underestimate Vance Clearly, Vance sees a greater danger to his ambitions if he were to distance himself from his friend Carlson or tell the groypers to go back into the holes from which they have emerged.

Nor should he be underestimated. As he showed in his Phoenix speech, he is someone who can combine Trump’s populist instincts with intellectual depth the president lacks, along with a polished orator’s skill in rallying the voters to his side. The process by which the GOP field will be cleared for him may have already begun, with U.S. Secretary of State Marco Rubio already indicating that he won’t oppose Vance and with Kirk’s widow, Erika Kirk, endorsing him.

But if Vance is prepared to proceed in the coming years as the leader of a conservative coalition that welcomes the groypers that sends a chilling signal to Jews and the majority of American voters who support Israel and oppose such bigotry. A similar message has already been sent to the country by the Democratic Party, whose intersectional base has embraced toxic left-wing ideas that promote hatred for Israel and grant a permission slip for antisemitism.

Given the Trump administration’s principled fight against antisemitism in American education and its historic support for Israel, many Jews were coming to see the GOP as their natural ally. But if Vance’s message, in which the administration sees no enemies on the right, truly reflects the future of the Republican Party—and it may well—that potentially leaves those who care about halting the post Oct. 7 surge in antisemitism and reaffirming the alliance with Jerusalem without a political home in 2028.

Jonathan S. Tobin is editor-in-chief of JNS (Jewish News Syndicate).

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2028, Vance picked a side. And it was the one that did not seek to establish any limits that might exclude those who have articulated antisemitism or, like Carlson, are at war with the idea of a Judeo-Christian heritage, which is the foundation of political conservatism.

Directly addressing the issue spoken about by Shapiro and Carlson, Vance made it clear that he stood on the side of the latter.

“I didn’t bring a list of conservatives to denounce or to deplatform, and I don’t really care if some people out there—I’m sure we’ll have the fake news media—denounce me after this speech,” he said.

“But let me just say, the best way to honor Charlie is that none of us here should be doing something after Charlie’s death that he himself refused to do in life. He invited all of us here. Charlie invited all of us here for a reason. Because he believed that each of us—all of us—had something worth saying, and he trusted all of you to make your own judgment.

And we have far more important work to do than canceling each other.”

Though he didn’t say so explicitly, his vision of a conservative big tent is obviously one that seems to include the “groypers” who follow Fuentes and think that his neo-Nazi beliefs are normative.

It seems to also include those who, like Carlson and Owens, are “just asking questions” when they spew blood libels and other lies about Israel and the Jews.

While he pre-emptively put down any criticism of this stand as the product of the “fake news media,” you don’t have to be a critic of Vance or Trump to see the problem here.

I’ve cheered Vance’s ability to articulate and push for a “national conservative” agenda that offered an alternative to both an out-of-touch GOP establishment and to the left, as I did when he was first tapped for the vice presidency. I did so again in February when he defended democratic values. In a controversial speech, he rightly took European nations to task for their efforts to shut down criticism of open-border immigration policies that are destroying the national identities of those nations and allowing Islamists to mainstream antisemitism there.

The Jewish Home | DECEMBER 25, 2025

120

Political Crossfire

Worried About the AI Spending Boom?

Here’s Some Historical Context.

By George F. Will

C

apital spending on AI currently accounts for about the same percentage of the economy as railroads did in the 1860s.

The year 1929 is a yellow caution light constantly flashing in the national memory. In his March 4 Inaugural Address, Herbert Hoover proclaimed: “In no nation are the fruits of accomplishment more secure… I have no fears for the future of our country.” Just 239 days later – Oct. 29, Black Tuesday – the stock market crashed, causing … it is unclear what.

New York Times financial columnist Andrew Ross Sorkin has kicked a hornets’ nest by writing “1929,” his lively retelling of what preceded the crash, and what the crash precipitated. It is about the consequences of the crash itself that the hornets are being heard from. A pugnacious cohort, they correctly argue that, but for misguided New Deal policies from 1933 through 1939, the decade-long economic Depression would have been much milder and shorter. So, books would not be written about 1929.

The deep (33 percent) stock market collapse of 1920 did not provoke government activism. The Roaring Twenties followed.

Read Sorkin for fascinating details about the 1920s stock-buying mania. And

for perspective on what today’s animal spirits are producing in artificial intelligence investments.

The 1920s brought, Sorkin says, “the birth of the modern consumer economy” – cars, radios, household appliances, etc. It was fueled by consumer credit. First, General Motors, then Sears, then many others began selling their products on credit. As did stock brokers.

Debt, as Sorkin says, “draws the wealth of tomorrow into the present.” A stock-picking astrologist became a national celebrity. As the stock market’s 1929 convulsions accelerated, a Manhattan lunch for financial high-flyers was disrupted by the household staff’s boisterous response to their stock ticker in the kitchen.

The New York Times did not rank the crash the top story of 1929 (Richard Byrd’s flight to the South Pole was). But a lost decade followed. Sorkin and the hornets can debate the causation. Now, about today.

The Wall Street Journal says business AI investments might have accounted for half of GDP growth, adjusted for inflation, in 2025’s first six months. JPMorgan Chase says this year rising AI stock prices boosted consumer spending almost 1 percent. And when the bubble bursts? 1929 and its aftermath again? Adrian Wooldridge, author

(with Alan Greenspan) of “Capitalism in America,” suggests the 19th century again.

In a Bloomberg column, he discerns similarities between America’s railroad and digital revolutions. Both had transformative impacts on the entire economy, enriching “a handful of titans.” Capital spending on AI currently accounts for about the same percentage of the economy as railroads did in the 1860s. In the 1880s, railroads accounted for about 60 percent of the stock market.

Then came the shakeout as some railroads went bust. “Building ahead of demand,” Wooldridge says, “all but guarantees booms and busts.” However: “Building rail lines in the middle of nowhere requires a big upfront investment. But once you have built the railway, civilization floods in and the value of the wilderness rises exponentially.”

In just four years (1868 through 1871), 33,000 miles of track were built. Fortunes were made – and lost. But when the financial dust settled, the nation was laced together by steel rails, connecting communities summoned into existence by trains.

Today, Wooldridge notes, “digital companies are investing heavily well before revenue streams come online.” Would-be titans gush about AI “in the same mystical

tones that the railway barons once talked about manifest destiny.” By shrinking time and space, the railway boom hugely benefited the public, especially future generations. Will today’s AI boom?

The Economist says, “If America’s stock market crashes, it will be one of the most predicted financial implosions in history.”

Stocks are 21 percent of households’ net worth, and AI-related assets “are responsible for nearly half the increase in Americans’ wealth over the past year.” And “a fall in stocks comparable to the [early 2000s] dotcom bust would reduce Americans households’ net worth by 8 percent. That could cause a big retrenchment in consumer spending.”

This will be messy. But bet on a net benefit from today’s AI investment mania, which now accounts for 1.5 percent of GDP. In 1969, one enormous, ubiquitous company – Sears – accounted for 1 percent of GDP. Seven years earlier, however, a 44-year-old Arkansas retailer borrowed audaciously and opened a store named for him, sort of. Sam Walton called it Wal-Mart Discount City. In 2018, Sears filed for bankruptcy. Then as now, a new day dawning meant the sunset for older ways. © 2025, Washington Post Writers Group

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DECEMBER 25, 2025 | The Jewish Home

Military Year in Review Part I

By Avi Heiligman

C

onflicts and military affairs saturated major news coverage in 2025. The headlines ranged from operations against Iranian nuclear sites, the Israeli war against terrorists, and conflicts being ended by President Trump.

Here are some of the stories from the military world over the past year.

Since October 7, 202,3 Israel has been fighting against radical terrorists on several fronts. These terrorists are proxies of Tehran. The tension between Israel and Iran had been building long before October 7.

On June 13, 2025, Israel launched a surprise attack to neutralize Iranian nuclear capabilities and erode its military leadership. Over the course of the twelve-day conflict, Israel launched over 1,000 precision airstrikes and used 200 aircraft. During Operation Rising Lion, IRGC head Hossein Salami and several key nuclear scientists were eliminated. Iran sent approximately 1,000 missiles and drones at Israel and targeted population centers. Israeli defense systems intercepted many of the incoming missiles and drones, but some made their way through, causing significant structural damage. The conflict resulted in 33 Israeli fatalities and thousands of injuries before the ceasefire on June 24.

On June 22, acting on orders from President Trump, American B-2 Spirit stealth bombers struck Iranian nuclear sites buried deep within the mountains. Called Operation Midnight Hammer, seven B-2 bombers of the 509th Bomb Wing took off from the Whiteman Air Force Base in Missouri for a 37-hour round trip flight. Over 100 other aircraft took part in the mission including aerial tankers and fighters like the F-22 and F-35 for escort. The stealth bombers dropped several 30,000-pound GBU-57A/B Massive Ordnance Penetrator (MOP) bunker busters on the sites at Fordow and Natanz. Simultaneously, 30

Tomahawk cruise missiles were launched from an American submarine and targeted the nuclear technology center at Isfahan.

American officials reported that the sites sustained extremely heavy damage, and no American casualties were reported.

A primary achievement of the first year of the second Trump administration is the ending or de-escalation of several wars and conflicts. In May, following intensive mediation by the U.S., India and Pakistan agreed to a truce to end the fighting that erupted the previous month. Trump negotiated the Israel and Iran ceasefire that took effect on June 24. Other successful diplomatic efforts of the Trump administration included a cooperation deal between the

tences. Israel pulled back to the Yellow Line while an international force was supposed to be created to keep the peace in Gaza.

Hamas has yet to disarm and still holds the remains of an Israeli hostage.

Israeli Prime Minister Bibi Netanyahu was staunch in his position to free all of the hostages and was involved in many of the IDF’s operations in the past year. The Trump administration has spent a lot of time and effort focusing on peace around

The Trump administration has spent a lot of time and effort focusing on peace around the world, and many were dismayed (although not surprised) when he was passed over for the Noble Peace Prize.

Congo and Rwanda, a truce between Cambodia and Thailand, a peace treaty between Armenia and Azerbaijan, and a diplomatic resolution between Serbia and Kosovo. The war between Russia and Ukraine remains ongoing; the administration continues to engage in active, extensive negotiations.

Negotiation efforts from the Trump administration led to the Israel and Hamas agreement in October. All hostages, both living and dead, were to be released in exchange for prisoners held in Israel jails including 250 who were serving life sen-

the world, and many were dismayed (although not surprised) when he was passed over for the Noble Peace Prize.

During the past year, Israel has launched strikes against several top terrorists and eliminated many who were involved in the October 7 attacks. Hamas military spokesman Abu Obaida was targeted and killed on August 30, and reportedly hundreds of thousands of dollars flew into the air after the missiles struck his location. He was heavily involved in the propaganda efforts after October 7 by

releasing videos taken by the terrorists.

His speeches and his prominence within the Hamas chain of command made him a primary target for Israel.

Mohammed Sinwar, brother of Yahya, was killed by an airstrike on May 13. He was involved in the planning of the October 7 attacks and was the leader of Hamas inside Gaza following the killing of his brother in 2024. Israel had tried several times to assassinate Mohammed, and he was finally killed while hiding in a bunker underneath a hospital. Muhammad Shabana, commander of the Rafah Brigade, was also eliminated in the strike.

Raed Saad was killed on December 13 and was the number two military commander for Hamas in Gaza at the time of his death. The IDF stated that he was one of the architects of the October 7 attacks and was the founder of the Nukhba terrorist force that led the savage attack on Israel. A precision strike from an Israeli drone killed him and his bodyguards while they were traveling in a vehicle in Gaza City.

These are just some of the military news stories from around the world in 2025. In the next article, we will focus on other military news topics from the past year like the Defense Department changing names to the War Department, Medal of Honor recipients, and new weapons systems.

Avi Heiligman is a weekly contributor to The Jewish Home. He welcomes your comments and suggestions for future columns and can be reached at aviheiligman@gmail.com.

The Jewish Home | DECEMBER 25, 2025

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5 TOWNS - OFFICES FOR LEASE 250SF to 500SF Offices in Inwood & Cedarhurst Utilities, Internet & Parking incl. with some Kosher kitchen - Minyan Next to LIRR - No broker fee Call/text/Whatsapp: 516-206-1100

HELP WANTED

Don’t Get Stuck With a Two Story House Ya Know, It’s One Story Before You Buy It But a Second Story After You Own It! Call Dov Herman For An Accurate Unbiased Home Inspection Infrared Termite Inspection Full Report All Included NYC 718-INSPECT Long Island 516-INSPECT www.nyinspect.com

DELIVERY PERSON NEEDED to deliver this Newspaper every Thursday morning to locations in Brooklyn. Must have Mini van or SUVand availability to work Consistently every week.

Good pay - Please email gabe@fivetownsjewishhome.com or call (917) 299-8082 REGENTS EXPERT Tutoring regents in Algebra and Geometry A Darchei Torah instructor. Guaranteed results Text 347-491-8045 WhatsApp 347-767-1755

LEAH SCHEININGER

Licensed Real Estate Salesperson Realty Connect USA 516-884-6530 (C) Lscheininger@realtyconnectusa.com @LeahScheininger_Realtor 24 Franklin Ave. Hewlett NY 11557

WOODMERE

Charming colonial w/ basement on picturesque street. Prime Woodmere SD 14 location. 3 beds, 1.5 baths. $989k

JUST SOLD

JUST SOLD

WOODMERE

WOODMERE

905 Greenfield Rd Last ask $2.175M

IN CONTRACT

OFF-MARKET! 901 Greenfield Rd Custom new construction

IN CONTRACT

SOLD OUT! WOODMERE - CAMPUS ESTATES

Campus Estates in the desirable Academy Area of Woodmere is officially sold out!!

Congrats to the developers and to all the buyers on their beautiful new homes.

Still looking for new construction? Call me for upcoming opportunities!

ZAREINU Is seeking a Co-teacher position for this year for a seventh and eigth grade girls class in a the 5 Towns M-TH 2:00-4:30 & Friday 8:15-12:45.

Great pay! Warm environment with administrative support!

Email resume: info@zareinu.org or call 718-406-8343 ext 229 JEWISH PRESCHOOL In Merrick seeks warm, loving, experienced toddler teacher for 2-year-olds.

Mon-Thu 9-3, Fri 9-2.

Email admissions@jewishelc.org or call 516-833-3057 ext 110.

In Great Neck, NY, is seeking general studies teachers for both the elementary and middle schools, for the upcoming academic year.

Mon-Thur afternoons. Competitive salary, warm and supportive environment. Send resume to m.kalati@kolyaakov.org SEEKING ELEMENTARY TEACHERS and assistants for General Studies for the ‘25-’26 year. Assistants should have skills to take over for teachers if needed. Far Rockaway area boys’ school, M-Th, PM hours, strong support. Excellent salary.

Send resume to teachersearch11@gmail.com.

DECEMBER 25, 2025 | The Jewish Home

classifieds@fivetownsjewishhome.com • text 443-929-4003

The Jewish Home | DECEMBER 25, 2025

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Classifieds

classifieds@fivetownsjewishhome.com • text 443-929-4003

HELP WANTED

HELP WANTED

HELP WANTED

MISC.

ORTHODOX SYNAGOGUE

MAKE A DIFFERENCE IN Someone special’s life!

Great com/hab opportunity available!

Excellent Pay! *Valley Stream: *Female to escort young lady in the community on Sundays.

Call: 718 -252-3365 ext:102 renay@specialcarefor.com

DEVELOPMENT ASSISTANT

HASHAVAS AVEIDA Apple airpods found on Wednesday morning on the way to the Woodmere dock.

To claim, 516-351-8105.

In Atlantic Beach seeks a warm, engaging youth leader for Shabbat & holiday groups.

Competitive pay & perks!

Send resumes/inquiries to youth@jcabshul.org MDS REGIONAL NURSE 5 Towns area Nursing Home management office seeking a Regional/Corporate level MDS Nurse to work in our office.

Must be an RN. Regional experience preferred. 2-3 years MDS experience with good computer skills required.

Position is Full Time but Part Time can be considered.

Great Shomer Shabbos environment with some remote options as well.

Email: officejob2019@gmail.com

BOOKKEEPER A Five Towns Real Estate Company is seeking a full-time Bookkeeper. The right candidate must be proficient with QuickBooks and Excel.

They must also be self-motivated, organized, detail oriented, reliable, and able to work independently or as a team player. Warm, frum office environment with excellent salary & benefits. Please email resume to HR@capsprop.com

A multi-tasker needed for general office work. The ideal candidate is someone who is detail-oriented, responsible, and can take ownership.

SHMIRAS HALASHON Text 516-303-3868 with a time slot of

Looking for someone who is eager

your choice to be careful on lashon

to learn, and expand his/her skill set

hara. Be a part of the 1,000

while possessing the ability to work independently and as part of a team.

Experience with Excel required. Five Towns location. In-office position only, not remote. Please send resume to 5tpart.timecareer@gmail.com

people for klal yisroel!

BEIS HAMEDRASH CONG. Chasdei Uvois Oshpitzin Talmidei chachomim are willing to learn mishnayos, say kaddish and be the shliach tzibbur to daven for the umid on the yartzeit yom hashanah of your parents or close relatives or loved ones To arrange please call Rabbi Miller 917-445-6220

TJH Classifieds Post your Real Estate, Help Wanted, Services, Miscellaneous Ads here.

Weekly Classifieds Up to 5 lines and/or 25 words 1 week ................$30 2 weeks .............. $50 4 weeks .............. $80 Email ads to: classifieds@fivetownsjewishhome.com Include valid credit card info and zip code

Deadline Monday 5:00pm

We put the “Pro“ in

Property!

Don Miller

Tamar Miller

Hollywood, Florida (954) 300-3142 MillerRealtySouth.com

CEDARHURST

WOODMERE

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2 family luxury townhouses on the beach, private balconies, access to private beach and dock.

Ayelet (516)993-9561 STARTING AT $1.15M

8 bedroom, 6.5 bath, Newly designed custom home, on a 6,000sqft lot Bryna (516)322-4831, Chana (516)449-9692 $2.99M

1br 1bth charming first floor co-op. in prestigious building.

Chana (516)449-9692 $359K

FAR ROCKAWAY

HEWLETT

LAWRENCE

DECEMBER 25, 2025 | The Jewish Home

27 Frost Lane Lawrence, NY 11559 (516) 374-4100 www.ftmr.com

FR- SALTMEADOW TOWNHOMES

Newly renovated, legal 2 Family, 5 bedrooms, 3 bath townhouse.

Ayelet (516)993-9561 $949K

Commercial office spaces 8 individual office spaces for lease.

Chana (516)449-9692 Starting At $600/M

Beautiful side-hall colonial 4 Bedrooms 2.5 Baths on a 20,909sqft lot.

Avigail (516)316-3452 $2.95M

CEDARHURST

FAR ROCKAWAY

NORTH WOODMERE

10 year old center-hall colonial, 8 bdrms, 7 bths, pool, with 6,400sf of living space, on a 9,700sf lot, premium amenities.

Don (347)992-6343,Tamar (917)902-0613 $3.2M

2br/2bth spacious condo with private porch, easy access to the shoreline.

Chava Rina (929)352-3858 $529K

Move right into this beautiful 4br home in heart of N. woodmere on an oversized lot.

Sarah (347)524-9147 $1.199M

NORTH WOODMERE

ATLANTIC BEACH

CEDARHURST

Brand-new construction, featuring 5 bedrms and 4 baths with an additional 2 bedrms and 1.5 baths in the basement.

Avigail (516)316-3452 $3.29M

Spacious Colonial home for rent featuring 5 bedrooms and 4 full baths on a 6,060 sq ft lot Moshe (516)455-5364 $6,000/M

Commercial Building: 2nd Floor for Lease, multiple office spaces with a common area.

Raizie (917) 903-1778 $3,600/M

HOLLYWOOD

HALLANDALE BEACH

DEERFIELD BEACH

Olympus Condo- 1 bdrms, 1 baths, 1,000sf Kayla (347) 729-9863 Chana (516)449-9692 $199K

Multi units: 2 bedrooms, 2 baths, 1000sf Kayla (347) 729-9863 Starting At $239K

Contract Pending

6 bdrms, 3.5 baths, 4,200sf, lot size 14,736sf Kayla (347) 729-9863 $1.995M

The Jewish Home | DECEMBER 25, 2025

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Life C ach

The Woe of a Weekly Article

By Rivki D. Rosenwald Esq., LMFT, CLC, SDS

Y

ou may think the one challenge of writing a weekly column is coming up with interesting material to put

in it.

However, that actually pales in comparison to the challenge of remembering to submit it by deadline once you do.

“Life gets busy. I do a million other things. No one reminds me—not even my assistant.”

I can go on and on with excuses, but honestly, no one suffers but me.

Well, I take that back. You, my devoted readers, suffer the most.

You miss out on my variety of topics that take you away from typical news that can be heavy and depleting.

You miss out on my brilliant perspectives that often help you pivot from one way of seeing things to a more expansive or inclusive vantage point.

But most of all, you miss out on my stellar humor that helps lighten up your week and allows you the needed chuckle that can provide both physical and mental health benefits.

And for this, I am truly sorry.

We all try to balance a lot: work, family, community, the expected, and the unexpected—and each comes with its own set of hurdles to surmount.

So the chance to get away from it, or find a new twist on it, or to simply veer to a different topic, is often welcome.

Most of all, I try to find the humor in our daily lives.

I try to point out the things we already know but fail to linger on from the comedic side—or to focus on the fact that everybody else is going through many of the same experiences, and therefore, we are not alone. Which helps.

For instance, the bathroom experience on a plane.

Whether you get the “coup” of an aisle seat or the unbothered comfort of the inside window seat, you will always face the bane of the bathroom experience.

Do you bother everyone to get out when you’re three seats in?

Can you wait?

Can you possibly be nimble enough to

climb from armrest to armrest?

And how about this scenario: even though you’re fortunate enough to be in the aisle seat—with the power to go as you please, aside from having your foot or elbow banged into again and again by the beverage cart—you are not independent.

Your seatmates often need to get out to use the facilities.

er or not you ever head to the facilities. The proximity is simply too close for it not to.

For instance, the dance of the armrest.

Who gets it, and which part of it do they get? Honestly, you’d think they could provide each person with their own armrest.

But then again, with seats of such miniature size, there would be no room for all your body parts if they did.

There are hidden thoughts—and often lighthearted humor—in so much of what we confront all the time.

Therefore, you repeatedly need to close your tray table, rebalance your computer, drop your phone, and get up again.

You are not a free spirit at all. You are being watched constantly from the moment you sit down. Your seatmates observe you like hawks, waiting for that one moment you stand so they can escape without bothering you.

There is a secret connection happening, even though you think you are all individual flyers. And it’s happening wheth-

So, no seat is truly perfect. Though I’m sure right now, those who get the middle seat are thinking, I’d take either of the other two easily!

Let’s look back on Chanukah for a moment. What are some shared experiences people often fail to discuss and commiserate over? Let’s bring them out in the light.

You are not alone.

The candle tension: Will I have enough candles for all the menorahs we’re lighting—and will they last all eight

days? After all, it’s not just eight candles per menorah. It’s incrementally one more every night, leading up to all eight. And then, on top of that, there’s that sneaky little shamash.

And what do I do about the shamash when I use oil candles? I can’t use that little glass cup of oil to light the other candles. So do I even need it in the center?

Do I light it just for the look? Or what do I do with the wax candle I’m using to light the others?

Have people asked these questions, or do most just go rogue?

There are hidden thoughts—and often lighthearted humor—in so much of what we confront all the time. Seeing things with that twist helps us laugh a little rather than feel upset or alone.

Like loud music at weddings. Half the room wants it louder, and the other half can’t stuff enough tissues, toilet paper, or earplugs into their ears to tolerate the atmosphere. Each side has its supporters!

Perhaps wedding mechitzas should no longer separate men and women but rather those who want to be near the speakers and those who want distance from them.

For much of what we’re going through, if we can just find support—or a drop of humor—we can get through it better.

Therefore, I reiterate: I’m sorry if I ever miss out on providing that for you. I could claim I couldn’t get out of my seat on the plane to access my computer, or that I was so busy doing the math on how many candles I needed for Chanukah that time got away from me. But that’s no excuse.

Though dealing with the ringing in my ears from the last few simchas might work…maybe?!

Keep trying to see the brighter side of things—and have a great week!

Rivki Rosenwald is a Licensed Marriage & Family Therapist working with both couples and individuals and is a certified relationship counselor. Rivki is a co-founder and creator of an effective Parent Management of Adolescent Years Program. She can be contacted at 917705-2004 or at rivkirosenwald@gmail.com.

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DECEMBER 25, 2025 | The Jewish Home

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