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OCTOBER 29, 2015 | The Jewish Home
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NOVEMBER 12, 2020 | The Jewish Home
Strength Beyond Her Years
Yehudis Heimlich, a”h by Shlomo Kacholsky
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his past Wednesday, on the 17th of MarCheshvan, the weather turned sunny and milder, a brief respite from the biting cold days of earlier in the week, as if a nod from Above to those gathered: please go do your holy work. Those who gathered were actually gathering in Far Rockaway to pay their kavod acharon to Yehudis Baila bas R’ Yeshaya Dovid, Heimlich, a”h. Her 23 years of life sadly and abruptly ended as if a rug had been pulled out from those gathered on it. The jolting reality of the beautiful Yehudis no longer being with her family and friends is as startling as it is sobering. The rabbanim who spoke about Yehudis, a”h, did so with a tangible reverence for “this tzaddeikes” calling her a “holy neshama” several times. Rabbi Eytan Feiner spoke about Yehudis, a”h, by reading a letter that his wife, Rebbetzin Feiner, who knew Yehudis, a”h, from her time at her seminary, penned. The warmth, the ever-contagious giggle, the uncanny ability to connect with new people and establish friendships quickly and meaningfully were but a few of the recollections that the Rebbetzin mentioned. Rabbi Shmuel Hiller spoke emotionally about his many years of personal interactions with Yehudis, a”h, at BBY. He tearfully recounted how immensely strong she was in general, but more specifically even during tough times and challenging days over her years. He recalled the numerous times that he, along with Rabbi and Mrs. Heimlich, worked behind the scenes to make her curriculum challenging enough, yet accommodating for her struggles. He fondly spoke of Yehudis’s successes, both academically as well as socially,
and her strength to persevere even with her difficult health challenges. Rabbi Yossi Heimlich, Yehudis’s oldest brother, yb”lch, noted the death of Sarah Imeinu and the commentary of the first Rashi in Parshas Chayei Sarah, which says that all her years were “good.” How could they be good with all the trials and tribulations that Sarah Imeinu went through? He quoted the meforshim that explain “good” is what is made of challenging times. We might not understand the Ways of Hashem, but believing and knowing that all He does is for the good helps us accept His Ways, much like this challenging loss of Yehudis, a”h. His reverence for his beloved sister and her strength to achieve amazing things was echoed by all his siblings. It was always Yehudis, a”h, who got all the extended family together. To her, family wasn’t something that was a side dish in life, rather it was the meat-and-potatoes. She cherished and loved her family like no other. Perhaps she knew that she would never be zocheh to have children of her own. More than anyone though, she had a unique mother-daughter relationship that transcended the norm. Inseparable, connected at the hip, right hand …all were descriptions used to describe the bond that was as strong as it was loving. Yehudis’s mother, yb”lch, Mrs. Faigie Heimlich, was maspid her “right hand” for those gathered in the bais olam. She recalled the countless times that Yehudis, a”h, needed medical attention, as recently as 4 months ago with her final diagnosis and battle. “She was always strong, unwavering, unquestioning of Hashem, and brave beyond her years. She was
5-going-on-20 when she underwent a bone marrow transplant.” During her recent illness, while hospitalized during COVID, she would not accept the medical staff’s directives that her father or mother couldn’t accompany her into a room or an exam. “If they don’t come, then I don’t go,” she told them with the conviction of a seasoned businesswomen throwing her weight around. Her physical strength may have been unremarkable, but her spiritual strength was truly of immense proportions. While she was an assistant playgroup morah for several years, she decided this summer to open her own playgroup. With all her challenges, with illness and more, she achieved what seasoned veterans probably couldn’t and indeed opened her very own playgroup. Her care and concern for her many nephews and nieces was astonishing. They all felt her love so tangibly, whether when she bought them things or took them places, she did so with such devotion and care. Mrs. Heimlich urged those looking at the freshly covered kever of their beloved Yehudis to go on with life, but momentarily questioned how she would. “I don’t know how, but we will,” she whispered as she choked back her tears. A true testament to the genuine feelings of her deeply painful loss. Yehudis’s father, yb”lch, Rabbi Shaya Heimlich, recalled the earliest days of her life after having learned of her diagnosis with a degree of confusion. His joy was immense with the birth, but yet he pondered to himself, This is what I’m thankful for? “I named her Yehudis to reflect ‘hapa’am odeh es Hashem’ the eternal statement uttered thousands of years ago by Leah Imeinu after con-
ceiving Yehuda. But truth be told,” he said in his hesped, “I didn’t feel all that grateful. She needed to have a surgery within 24 hours of her birth. She needed to have a bone narrow transplant by age 5. This is what I’m thankful for?” sobbed Rabbi Heimlich aloud to those gathered. But he continued, “It is only now, now that I have seen what she accomplished in her short 23 years on this world, now after I see how strong and full of emunah she was, now that she is gone from my life, can I truly be so thankful for the gift that I, and my family, were zocheh to.” Yehudis’s grandmother, yb”lch, Mrs. Heidy Heimlich, lamented her dearest grandchild and the loss she felt. She recalled the many times they spent together, how special she was and how much she would miss her. Even when playing a simple game of Rummikub, Yehudis, a”h, would “somehow” manage to always lose knowing how happy it made her grandmother feel to “win.” Her sensitivity, maturity, and interest to make others happy were something to cherish and, more importantly, be inspired from. Rabbi Heimlich’s concluding and heart-wrenching words of his hesped for his precious daughter were, “I want to take you home with me right now, Yehudis, but we are leaving you behind… We are leaving you behind, Yehudis.” Ultimately, it was said at the shivah house that she was not left behind at all, rather she left us behind. Her short journey to a better place, enjoying a lichtigeh Gan Eiden with her many ancestors who welcome and shelter her, adjacent to the Kisay Hakovod, is truly the Real Destination. Zichronah livrachah.
