Discerning God’s
Will
by Pam Farrel
Training Your Heart to
Praise
A RHYTHM FOR SUMMER AGING BEAUTIFULLY
by Katie Davis Majors
FREED FROM THE SHAME OF PORN THE REWARDS OF RELINQUISHMENT
summer 2023 | F I N D M O R E A T J U S T B E T W E E N U S . O R G
welcome from the editor SHELLY ESSER
We’re so grateful you’ve invited us into your homes and hearts to spend the summer together. I wish I could look at each of you in the eyes and tell you in person just how precious you are to God and to this sisterhood of faith. We consider it a joy—our word for the year—to prayerfully select articles with you in mind each quarter. We desire for you to feel less alone and to offer you hope as you navigate these ever-changing times in the world around you. One thing you can count on no matter what happens is you have a God who loves you and is never going to take His eyes off you. You are His beloved daughter and He is for you and working in every detail of your life whether you feel it or not. As you quiet your soul and grab a few minutes just for yourself, we’re trusting that God meets you on every page. We know He has something specific in mind for you in this issue. May you find inspiration, refreshment, biblical truth, and encouragement to lift your heart as you live out your faith in your everyday life.
And finally, in keeping with your requests for us to address the tough topics women face and struggle with in today’s culture, we hope you will find help and hope for yourself or someone you know who is struggling with pornography. Yes, women struggle in this area, too! Allow our brave author, Jessica Harris, to enlighten and encourage you as she shares her very personal and vulnerable sex addiction story of redemption on page 28. Battling this sexual challenge can create immense shame, and that is not God’s desire. Let Him carry you into the light and bring healing that is possible for every woman struggling with pornography. And a Happy Mother’s Day to all you moms, grandmoms, and spiritual moms! We hope you can put your feet up out on the patio with your favorite iced latte and be pampered in the way you desire. You deserve it and we celebrate all you do for all the people in your life. You are amazing and world-changers! May this summer bring you the gifts of rest, relaxation, and fun—and may God refresh the deepest parts of your soul as you slide into the new rhythm that summer brings. With joy,
summer2023 2023 betweenus ȷust ȷustbetween us summer
Here are some of the exciting articles you’ll find in this issue. Katie Davis Majors, mom of 15, shares an excerpt from her newest book, Safe All Along: Trading our Fears and Anxieties for God’s Unshakeable Peace (Multnomah 2023) on page 14. If ever there was a need for encouragement for all of life’s anxieties and God’s peace, it’s today. We pray you will enjoy this peek into Katie’s heart as she shares about her move across the Atlantic to transition back to the States from Uganda after 15 years. We know her contagious faith will leave you hungering for more. Check out her book on Amazon.
Get your heart ready for summer with Cynthia Stuckey’s insightful and freeing article, “A Rhythm for Summer” on page 16. She provides a summer manifesto that reminds us that rest is good and a needed gift from God.
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Contents
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on the cover
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Discover four important principles to consider when figuring out what God wants you to do. by Pam Farrel
Learning to rejoice and train your heart to praise God for His goodness no matter what is going on in your life. by Katie Davis Majors
A summer manifesto that reminds us that rest is a good and needed gift from God. by Cynthia M. Stuckey
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By letting God’s standard of beauty define you, you’ll be able to age well. by Jen Allee
How women struggling with pornography and shame can find grace and freedom. by Jessica Harris
Discover the blessings in the daily act of surrender. by Nancy Sessions
Wisdom to Discern God’s Will
Worship Along the Way
ȷustbetweenus summer 2023
When Beauty Diminishes
4
Quenched
A Rhythm for Summer
Relinquished
About Our Ministry: Just Between Us is a vibrant and expanding not-for-profit ministry that continues to transform the lives of women around the world. Our heart-focused and biblically-based content in the print magazine, on the website, in the weekly digital mini magazine, on social media, and other products—all help women find hope and encouragement while growing their faith and deepening their love for Jesus.
Find Us in All Kinds of Ways:
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features
in every issue
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3 Welcome from the Editor 6 Meet Our Team 7 Between Us 8 Happy Home
Unspeakable Joy
Lessons we can learn about finding joy even in our deepest pain. by Lisa Elliott
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Words That Work
Running into God’s presence in worship is the key to being used in everything you say. by Jill Briscoe
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Inviting Others In
One woman’s inspiring story of how beautiful friendships can be born out of service. by Sarah Rooker
9 Encouraging WORDS 10 Transparent Moments columns
36 My Story
faith chats
Strengthening 38 Your Soul
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Minutes 39 15in the Word 40 Intentional Faith 42 Living Well
Faith Chats That Inspire
Annie Downs, Katherine Wolf, and Sharon Garlough Brown’s words are just as relevant today as they were years ago when we first interviewed them. compiled by Shelly Esser
Outside Your 43 Front Door veryday E Transformation
44 45 Faith at Work 46 Between Friends
CREDITS Founder/Executive Editor Jill Briscoe
Circulation Manager Suzan Braun
Editor Shelly Esser
Advertising & Accounts Manager Sharon Vaught
General Manager Mary Perso
Renewals Manager & Software Support Rebecca Loesche
Assistant Editor Suzan Braun
Renewal Assistants Wayne + Sally Schlittenhart
Director Digital Media Mary Ann Prasser
Marketing Julie Santiago
Editorial Assistants Ann Cook Constance B. Fink Gayle Gengler Cherry Hoffner Melinda Papador Danae Templeton
Director of Mission Advancement/ Social Media Ashley Schmidt Subscriptions Phil Perso Mary Richards Jan Schuldt Lin Sebena
Creative Director Julie Krinke Advisory Board Anita Carman Pam Farrel Judy Briscoe Golz Nancy Grisham Pam MacRae Elizabeth Murphy Jackie Oesch Stephanie Seefeldt
Prayer Sharon Stonecipher Intern Hailey Pitcher Photography Wayde Peronto Babboni Photography babbonis.com
ADVERTISING Ellie Dunn For more information call (856) 582-0690 ext. 2# or email ellie@carldunn.com. SUBSCRIPTIONS Subscription price: $19.95 per year for 4 issues. Outside US, add $11 per year prepaid US currency. Gift Your Ministries: Group subscriptions are now available at reduced rates. Encourage and inspire the women who make ministry happen at your church or other places of outreach or service to others. Energize their relationships, refresh their faith, and become equipped as a team for facing ministry challenges through Just Between Us. For more information, call 800-260-3342 today! Just Between Us (ISSN 1069-3459) is published quarterly by Just Between Us, 777 South Barker Road, Brookfield, WI 53045-3701. Make all checks and money orders payable to: Just Between Us, Subscription Orders 777 S. Barker Road, Brookfield, WI 53045 To order by phone, or for more information: call 800-260-3342. From Canada call (262) 786-6478. Email: jbu@justbetweenus.org Website: www.justbetweenus.org Periodical Postage Paid at Brookfield, WI and additional mailing offices. POSTMASTER: Send address changes to: Just Between Us, 777 S. Barker Road, Brookfield, WI 53045. Just Between Us is a member publication of the Evangelical Press Association. Copyright ©2023 by Just Between Us. All rights reserved. Printed in USA.
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ȷustbetweenus summer 2023
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meet our team
Our Just Between Us team is made up of incredible women with hearts to see you flourish in every area of your life, especially in your life of faith. They bring their collective gifts to make sure you don’t feel alone and that you are continually encouraged, so you can grow closer to Jesus and make an impact on His world.
JILL BRISCOE
SHELLY ESSER
MARY PERSO
SUZAN BRAUN
MARY ANN PRASSER Director Digital Media
ASHLEY SCHMIDT
Director of Mission Advancement/Social Media
REBECCA LOESCHE
SHARON VAUGHT
JULIE KRINKE
Founder
Circulation Manager & Assistant Editor
Renewals Manager & Software Support
ȷustbetweenus summer 2023
General Manager
Advertising & Accounts Manager
Creative Director
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Our donors make the future of JBU possible, and many of you have asked how to set up a recurring donation.
generation and for future generations.
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for many years to come—for this
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Editor
It’s our heart’s desire that women
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BETWEEN US
Crate Training… and Other Good Boundaries
M
om, we think you need a puppy.”
Lysa TerKeurst
Before my grown kids, who no longer live at home, got to the second syllable of the word puppy, I said no. I felt like this whole conversation was code for “they wanted all the fun of a puppy without the daily responsibilities of said puppy.” So, of course, I wound up getting a puppy. And it worked out exactly like I thought it would. But what I hadn’t counted on was completely falling in love with this little apricot colored fur ball of pure joy. Except every time I put Givey in his crate, he cried and cried until I couldn’t take it any longer and let him out. One day, my friend Shae came over to work on some projects and Givey was in rare form. I said, “I know I should put him in his crate for some time out, but I just can’t stand to hear him cry.” Shae replied, “You know, my mom had a really wise statement when we were crate training our dog, Rosie. My mom would say, “Well, I’m not happy 100 percent of the time in my life either. She’ll be just fine.” Eventually, Givey not only got used to spending appropriate amounts of time in his crate but wound up liking it. And it certainly brought relief to my puppy mom life. If he wants to chew something of his in his crate, great. But in the rest of my home, chewing up my stuff isn’t acceptable. Defining what is and is not acceptable is even more important with human relationships. If people are constantly annoying us, exhausting us, or running all over us, chances are we either don’t have the right kind of people in our life or we don’t have the right kind of boundaries.
This is where I’ve gotten boundaries wrong in the past. Boundaries don’t prevent me from being the best version of myself. Boundaries allow me to be the best version of myself. If I want to be a woman of compassion, good boundaries will help me be more compassionate. If I want to be a woman of grace, good boundaries will help me be more gracious. If I want to be a woman of forgiveness, good boundaries will help me be more forgiving. Good boundaries help us keep the best of who we are intact. Keeping this in mind, we can prayerfully consider where necessary boundaries may be needed in some of the relationships in our life without the added guilt or worry of what this person may think of us. Just like Givey has learned to thrive within the parameters of his crate, I believe we can learn to thrive in healthy, life-giving relationships, protected by sound, biblical boundaries.
Lysa TerKeurst is the president of Proverbs 31 Ministries
and a #1 New York Times’ bestselling author. Her newest books are Good Boundaries and Goodbyes: Loving Others Without Losing the Best of Who You Are and a new devotional called You’re Going to Make It. She writes from her gray farm table and lives with her family in North Carolina. Connect with her at www.LysaTerKeurst.com or on social media @LysaTerKeurst.
LysaTerKeurst.com LysaTerKeurst Lysa TerKeurst
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You might be thinking, “Boundaries don’t bring relief. They can make the other person angry or disappointed enough in me to say hurtful things about me. I just want to keep the peace, so I’ll go along with their attitudes and behavior so that I don’t have to deal with the fallout of addressing all of this.”
I’ve been that woman. Sometimes losing my temper because I’d let things go so long, I just couldn’t hold back my frustration any longer. Or, sometimes biting my tongue so long that I lost the desire to stay in that relationship. Ephesians 4:31-32 says, “Get rid of all bitterness, rage and anger, brawling and slander, along with every form of malice. Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you.” I’ve read those verses so many times and never made the connection that implementing healthy boundaries in my life could actually help me be this kind of woman.
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