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I Never Met Emily by Deck Cheatham
I
never met Emily Brown Kocis, but I know her. I know
those who go on. But we never just go on, for the life that
her as God allows me to know His truth, and in its light,
loves and touches also resurrects. We are changed because
her light, God’s light through her, I am changed. All who
this life was lived and was loved and did love. And through
knew her are changed. Emily was diagnosed with peritoneal
this resurrection, the eternal bond can never be broken. Love
mesothelioma, a rare cancer. She was a daughter, a sister,
has yet to know death.
a wife, a mother and more. She was 28. She parted this life January 7, 2017. Light emanates from her soul and spirit. Emily’s spirit touched me. I spent time reading her posts on Caring Bridge, and through her words, I began to understand a person’s life by its devotion to more than self. By its love and faith and courage in the face of human certainty, life is a prayer. Her life, more than self, prayed for us all. Emily walked her path with a sublime clarity, not with any sense of giving up, but with a confident determination to fight, to win, and to live. Her journey, which began with “just another hot Tuesday in July…that day that changed everything,” would forever alter the lives she touched.
Anne Lamott, in her book Traveling Mercies says, “They
Emily’s life, death, and words reveal God to me. She
seem always to be walking. As with all nomads, if you
said, “There is something about the illusion of a limitless
don’t keep walking, you die—so you figure out how to
horizon that makes you squander your time a little more
keep walking.” This is how I will think of Emily. Though
carelessly. And there is something about accepting the fact
here but for a while, she is still walking, leaving in her path
that the cancer may win that alters your field of vision. Time
grace, dignity, and hope, walking in the minds and hearts
becomes something to savor. Again, the fight is not over.”
of family and friends and the lives she touched, even people
I prayed for Emily so many times with so many others in so many solitudes. I asked God to heal her and give her strength and courage. As I read her words, I found she
like me who never met her. “Cast your cares on the Lord and he will sustain you; he will never let the righteous be shaken” (Psalm 55:22).
possessed these gifts before the first prayer was uttered.
For more information on peritoneal mesothelioma,
I asked for nothing less than what was in God’s power
contact the Mesothelioma Applied Research Foundation at
to grant. I asked for her light, God’s light through her, to
www.curemeso.org.
Our earthly bonds are but for a while, and though severed by death, the broken bond seeks an equilibrium for
36 // August 2022
About The Author
remain in our presence. Deck Cheatham has been a golf professional for some 40 years. He lives with his family in Dalton. He is a guest columnist for the Rome News Tribune, The Daily Citizen, and the Calhoun Times. Email him at pgadeacon@gmail.com.
