Quotes On Fatherhood

Femi Enigbokan

‘Femi ENIGBOKAN is a seasoned HR Consultant, Trainer, Investor, Teacher and Author. As Senior Pastor of RCCG The Rock Center, Atlanta, USA, he teaches the undiluted word of God, leading people to repentance and revival. He is happily married to Oluwatoyin and they are blessed with Godly children. Femi gives us detailed answers to some salient questions asked on fatherhood.

It is indeed a rare privilege to share some of my personal thoughts and practical insights on this Father’s day edition of the magazine. I strongly believe that the dearth of fathers in the world today is a cankerworm that is eating deep into the fabric of the society and world at large. The world today is full of males, but few MEN. It is high time that the real men stand up to their calling. The Man is the FOUNDATION of the home and the foundation is a position of responsibility and accountability, irrespective of what the world says.

Son Or Daughter: Who Is Harder To Raise?

Is there any difference in the way a father should raise a son compared to a daughter?

I must say that parenting in this generation is a lot harder. There are a lot of variables that have been included into the equation of parenting that was not there 25 years ago. So be it male or female, parenting takes a lot of time and effort. However, personally speaking, I believe it is almost impossible to raise two children the same way, irrespective of their similarity or differences in

gender. Maybe my vast experience in Human Resources has made me come to the understanding that there is no one-size-fits-all approach to handling things like this.

I believe it is the responsibility of every parent to look out for the best ways to reach each of their children and adopt these bespoke solutions accordingly. These techniques will differ from child to child in motivation, counselling, approach to discipline and even rewarding them. Fairness is also another key factor in parenting. As the Bible reminds us that women are more tender vessels and we should treat them as such, this applies to our daughters, wives, mothers and every woman out there.

“I employ a lot of discipline techniques and the most effective is the use of my eyes. Yes! My eyes speak and does wonders.”

So to answer your question plainly, I believe there should be a different approach to raising every child (irrespective of their gender). We should study our children and look for the best ways in line with the word of God to bring out the best in them.

What Is Your Own Form Of Appropriate Discipline?

“Just wait until your father gets home!” is a phrase most of us often heard growing up. Dad as a disciplinarian has defined most fathers throughout history.

I believe childhood is a process in life that gives birth to who an individual would eventually turn out to be. In other words, the quality of a man/ woman depends on certain factors that the boy/girl child is exposed to over a period of time.

I employ a lot of discipline techniques and the most effective is the use of my eyes. Yes! My eyes speak and does wonders. No matter where we are and how many people there are, I have trained my children so much that I don’t have to say a word; they get the message with my looks alone.

Between my wife and me, though I am the disciplinarian, the children know me as: z The more exciting and fun loving parent. z The spiritual authority of the home. z The one who will probably make out time to attend the school initiatives. z The one who would rather take them to a party or an outing. am the one that enforces the discipline in the house and my wife still uses that “Just wait until your Daddy gets home” cliché, I have also refined my responsibility to also involve loving and caring for them so that they don’t grow up to fear me and intentionally keep things from me when they are faced with life’s challenges.

Most importantly, I want to beseech all men out there to always pray for their children. Prayers go a long way to guiding them in places where you cannot go with them.