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Surviving Breast Cancer
z It is prayers that will keep evil from them z It is prayers that helps them make the right choices when they are at crossroads z It is prayers that breaks every negative influence and pattern over their lives z It is prayers that ensures they don’t turn from the training we have given them z It is prayers that ultimately makes a difference in their lives
“The horse is prepared against the day of battle: but safety is of the Lord”. –Proverbs 21:31 (KJV).
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Many fathers say they have been transformed by what their religious beliefs teach about the role of a father. My walk with God is the foundation of my life, it is the core of everything that I do in life–be it in ministry, marriage, relationship with people and also in business.
I have learnt to raise my children with the KIDS approach. K–Knowledge I–Intimacy D–Discipline S–Sensitive
KNOWLEDGE: I always seek to know more, because the only thing constant in life is change. What are the new techniques in parenting? How can I connect better with my children? What is God saying over the lives of my children? All these drive me to seek more knowledge.
INTIMACY: We must be intentional in our closeness to our children. Although I must say that they are closer to their mother, however we work hand-in-hand to ensure we don’t fail in the assignment of parenting. To summarize this, our children don’t care how much we know, until they know how much we care.
DISCIPLINE: The Bible teaches about discipline and trust me when I say I am a good disciplinarian. I would not say more than this; you probably need to meet my children to understand this better. Above all, the Bible tell us in Proverbs 13:24 that–“Whoever spares the rod hates their children, but the one who loves their children is careful to discipline them.”
SENSITIVE: I try to be sensitive to what my children are saying and what they are not saying. I also try to meet their Emotional, Physical, Educational and Spiritual needs as the Lord helps me.
My last words to us as parents is this: the world is evolving, there is so much to learn out there on proper parenting. The children of today are a lot different from previous generations and some of them have perfected the act of deception. It is however my prayer that the Lord will continually keep all our children and they will be far greater than us in Jesus mighty name. gw
Lanre Abu
Lanre Abu is a UK trained Economics/International Relations graduate with a post-graduate degree in Marketing. He is the Chief Operations Officer at New Covenant House (Formerly, Jesus House Dallas). He resides in Dallas, Texas with his beautiful wife Bukky and their two sons. We caught up with Lanre to find out what fatherhood means to him.
Are boys harder to raise than girls?
My simple answer to this is No. Raising boys or girls both have their different challenges.
Even though I don’t have girls, I would go ahead and be a little controversial by saying Yes and No.
There is a distinct and clear difference in how men and women are designed. Every branch of science from neuroscience to anthropology now confirms something the Bible has laid out all along. Of course, we believe that those differences are good and are there for a reason: God has an intended framework for what a man should be and what a woman should be. And every part of our identities will be affected by how we live out that design.
From my own personal experience growing up with two sisters, girls have different interests than boys. For example, my sisters were never introduced to pink and frills by my parents; but as they grew, they
developed a natural interest in those things just like how I and my brother were more drawn to remote control cars and toy guns.
Of course some girls love some “boyish” things, but the majority of girls like things that are traditionally considered “girly” things. This is not a product of how they are raised but a product of who they are.
Because of how the society is structured, girls can sometimes be disadvantaged and so it is necessary to raise them just like we would raise our sons so that the society does not take advantage of them.
Having said that, there are some things we have to do with our daughters that we don’t need to worry about with sons. For example, daughters have to be raised so that once they start having hormonal fluctuations, they simply don’t just go with the flow but rather recognize what is happening and do their best not to use it as an excuse to disrespect those around them.
On the other hand, there are also some things we have to do with the boys that we do not necessarily need to worry about with our girls. Boys are socially trained to be in charge and so we as parents have a responsibility to raise them to respect women so that they do not take advantage of societal norms. A clear case study of this is evidenced by recent rape events of some young girls in Nigeria.
“Just wait until your father gets home!” is a phrase that we might have often heard growing up. Dad as a disciplinarian has defined most fathers throughout history. What is your own form of appropriate discipline?
I really believe that children are different and thus, each requires different measures of discipline. I’ll give you an example; I have two young sons (Ages 9 & 10). All you need to do to get my older son to conform is simply express how disappointed you are with him. His younger brother on the other hand needs a bit more tough love and I never hesitate to bring out the belt when necessary.
Many Fathers say they have been transformed by what their religious beliefs teach about the role of a father. How has your spirituality influenced the way you raise your children?
Whenever I think of raising children, the Bible passage, Proverbs 22:16 comes to mind: Train up a child in the way he should go, and when he is old he will not depart from it.
As much I love my children, I cannot love them more than God loves them. I believe that God gave me a huge responsibility by sending these kids my
way and it is my responsibility to use my time with them wisely.
Children are like sponges; from the day they are born, they start to learn from everything around them and so it is important to be good examples; not just by teaching them to love the Lord and pleasing Him but also living a life that pleases God. gw
Philip Emmanuel
Fondly addressed as Philstone, Phillip is a project/change management consultant, with a drive for sustainable excellence, dedicated to ‘initiating, effecting and sustaining change’ in individuals and organizations. He also serves as a spiritual leader/ preacher. He and his wife, Tomilayo, are blessed with three children. Philstone gives his personal thoughts as regards these questions.
Are boys or girls harder to raise? Is there any difference in the way a father should raise a son compared to a daughter? Share a bit of your own experience.
on the male figure than the female figure. Regardless of the fact that this is cultural in nature and seems to have been subconsciously engrained in the fabric of a family structure, it cannot be totally ignored.
Hypothetically speaking, and having been blessed with children of both genders, I want to believe that boys are slightly harder to raise than girls, due to a number of reasons. I also believe that the attention span of the boy child seems to be shorter than that of the girl child, making instilling discipline and values in the former a little more challenging.
It is common knowledge and obvious reasons in our society, and the world at large, there’s a huge expectation and sense of responsibility placed Another issue worthy of note is the loads of common vices and distractions that span through the trajectory of the growth of a male child, which seems to
