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GEM Holiday Issue 2013

MAGAZINE For The Long IsLand Woman

long island’s morning voice

inside Healthy Holiday Beauty Trends Holiday Travel

dana didonato plus long island’s health & wellness beauty | fashion | fitness | business finance | nutrition | inspiration | dining family life | home decor | and more!



FROM THE PUBLISHER Recently, I was honored to be named as an Arthritis Foundation, Long Island Chapter, Women on the Move honoree for my efforts to help this worthy cause. I was touched by this recognition and by the support of my family, friends and colleagues at the award dinner held at the beautiful Carlyle on the Green at Bethpage State Park. I publish each issue of GEM Magazine LI, with a MISSION, a PASSION and a GOAL: to EMPOWER, INSPIRE AND MOTIVATE LONG ISLAND WOMAN and all women within my reach.

Arthritis Foundation, LI Chapter Women on the Move 2013 Honorees (L-R) Tanya Lee, Judy Lynch, Dr. Joan Faro, LTC Jennifer Minus and Emily Franch

I grew up with a VERY inspiring, empowering mother who THANKFULLY taught me TO NEVER GIVE UP! Dedicated to my AMAZING mother, Gem Magazine LI provides women with the BEST information regarding HEALTH, WELLNESS, FITNESS, FAMILY, BUSINESS, Inspiration and motivation.., ENCOURAGING women to be the BEST THEY CAN BE, in all aspects of their life with a “YOU CAN DO IT” ATTITUDE! I often say “We Nurture the JEWEL in EVERY woman!” Since women are know multitaskers….I seek out articles that help women take care of themselves FIRST, so they can take care of everyone else around them. Gem Magazine LI is PROUD to spotlight women making a difference on Long Island; Women Business Owners and Strong Island Women who don’t get the publicity they deserve. It is truly my pleasure to expose such AMAZING, DETERMINED individuals with such OUTSTANDING PERSEVERANCE. I HONESTLY LOVE what I DO, and am grateful for all the WONDERFUL people that I meet each day, and for the support I receive which enables me to make it happen. I am astonished by the ACCOMPLISHMENTS of others….this INSPIRES me. My favorite quote is “Every great dream begins with a DREAMER. Always remember you have within you the strength, the patience and the PASSION to reach for the stars AND CHANGE THE WORLD.” Please don’t ever lose sight of your dreams.

tany a

This holiday season and every season, remember to Inspire or Be Inspired! Happy Holidays!




Holiday 2013

The installation of 2013-2014 SCWBEC Officers and Board of Directors was held on September 12, 2013 at the H. Lee Dennison Building in Hauppauge, f e a t presided ures over by a representative from the Suffolk County Executive’s Office. SCWBEC was established 3 0 C O VinE1990 R S by TORY a group of visionary women who recognized need D A N A Dthe IDO N A TtoO establish procurement relationships in private & public sectors. The organization was supported by Suffolk County Office of Affirmative Action which later departments became the Office of Minority Affairs.

PUBLISHER Ta n y a L e e

CONTRIBUTORS Cathy Berger Carol Burke Evelyn Chin Grazia Monda Cooney Bonnie Hamer Leah Jantzen Today, SCWBEC has the same mission. 2 AsF the R O only M THE PUBLISHER Rosemarie Kluepfel organization of its kind on Long Island, a not-for-profit Laney Liner 4 B EBusiness AUTY in which women ownership is at least 51%, and whose 501C3, we continue to ensure that, Women Michele Martin day to day operations are run by women. Members Enterprises are knowledgeable of the 1 6purchasing FITNESS CarolCounty Nucci or reside must operate their business in Suffolk opportunities. Dedicated to helping break the barriers Frances McGarry in Suffolk County. Nassau WBE’s who meet the same 2 0 H E A L T H for women business owners and level the playing Alyse Parise criteria may join as Associate Members. SCWBEC field, SCWBEC continues to host monthly meetings, 2 4 NUTRITION Paula Kleeto Parish Membership is free, relying on sponsors cover the workshops and networking opportunities to help Barbara Quitoni administrative costs. For information on membership, women professionals expand their businesses. 2 9 MAKING A DIFFERENCE Tami Racaniello sponsorship opportunities, workshops and meeting Mary Rosenvinge 3 6 F A M I LY & R E L Adetails, T I O N Svisit H I S Over the years, SCWBEC has grown into a highly Rachel Seedorf -Rosemarie Kluepfel, SCWBEC Director of Public utilized resource for Women Business 3 8Owners I N S Pand I R AT I O N Leslie Tayne Relations, Ph: 631-468-7050 professionals alike. Members consist of businesses Adriana Vater 4 4 HOME & GARDEN Colleen White 5 6 BUSINESS & FINANCE Event Coordinator Michelle Young 6 0 CAR CARE An Event For All Times












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All artwork, design & layout by Gem Magazine LI, is sole property of the publisher and may not be reproduced in whole or part. The publisher will not be responsible for errors in advertising beyond the cost of the space occupied b y t h e e r r o r, a n d s u c h r e s p o n s i b i l i t y, i s a n y, s h a l l b e l i m i t e d o n l y t o t h e f i r s t u s e of advertising in the case of repeated use. The publisher reserves the right to edit or reject any advertising at its sole discretion. The advertiser shall represent that all artwork and copy provided by the advertiser is owned by the advertiser and it has the right to utilize such in this publication.©2013 Gem Magazine LI.



Shimmer Glimmer By Bonnie Hamer

Sparkle All The Way

The Holidays are here and we have an added excuse to “glam up” and add accents to our eyes, cheeks, and even lips. You won’t have to search far to find cosmetics to change your everyday look to a dramatic and enchanted one for all the parties and festivities. Even quiet romantic evenings can use an extra bit of dazzle to add to the afterglow. Whether you are searching for a glimmer of luster or an eye catching flash of sparkle, don’t be afraid to experiment. Accenting the EYES can create a whole new look. Begin with an eye primer for a rich color payoff and crease resistant wear.

Here is a list of some of my favorite go to holiday products: Glitter Pots – pure sparkle for added drama. Be sure to use a glitter adhesive to keep glitter in place Sparkle Pots – add high shimmer and can be worn wet or dry. Achieve a great look using these as an eye liner alone or on top of a base liner. Gem Dust – a loose glitter powder used to add a twinkle or shine. For LIPS, create a “just kissed look of sugarplum”. Start with a creamy long lasting lip crayon. Apply a moisturizing mineral lipstick in a “rose berry”, “rosewood”, or “magenta”. Top it with a shimmering lip shine. Dust your CHEEKS with an iridescent glow such as “pretty in pink” or “bossy bronze” to bring definition to your cheekbones and warmth to a cold winter night. Now…….. your sleigh is waiting. You are ready to glimmer, shimmer, and sparkle all the way through the season. Stay beautiful and Happy Holidays!!!!! Affirming your elegance… because it matters!



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Dazzling During the Holidays! By Rachel Seedorf The holiday season has begun, and we all know it is the busiest (and most wonderful) time of the year. Your calendar is likely full of holiday parties, fancy dinners and fun gettogethers with friends, shopping trips, and tons of photo opportunities! Here are some tips to keep your makeup looking great throughout the entire holiday season! First, prepare your skin properly before you apply makeup. If you have oily skin, apply an oil-free moisturizer onto freshly-cleansed skin. Once your skin has absorbed the moisturizer, use an oil-free makeup primer. This will prevent shine and prolong your coverage. If you have dry skin, use a serum or hydrating moisturizer first, apply your makeup and then finish with a hydrating setting spray to keep skin looking dewy instead of flaky. Second, choose to wear either stand-out eye makeup or a bold lip color-wearing both will make you look like a clown. For eyes, try a mauve smoky eye or a bold, glimmering metallic eye shadow for a fun, festive look. Finish the look with eyeliner and two coats of clump-free mascara (or falsies!). If choosing to focus on your pout, try a deep berry stain or the classic red lip for winter. Top it off with a sheer, shimmery gold lip gloss to add dimension and shine. When choosing to focus on lips, keep the rest of your makeup minimal so you don’t appear overdone. Lastly, add some glow to your complexion! Not all lighting is flattering, so apply a highlighter strategically to rid shadows on your face and give skin a healthy, angelic glow. Sweep a flesh-toned highlighter on the center of your forehead, down the bridge of your nose, on top of cheekbones, and just above the center of your upper lip. For more mature skin, try a cream-based highlighter instead of powder. The only other accessory you need to complete your holiday makeup look is a gorgeous smile! Happy Holidays!




2013 FASHIoN TRENDS By Adriana Vater

Party With


The time is upon us. . .Holiday Party Season! With so many parties to attend this year, how many fun hairstyles do you have in your beauty arsenal? If you’re not sure whether to go with the same, safe up-do from last year, or learn how to create jaw-dropping waves, here are some tips on simple can-do hairstyles to keep you looking gorgeous and fresh throughout the season.


Braids still reign supreme. There is nothing more practical and easy-to-do than all kinds of braided hairstyles. Be creative and add your own details and hair accessories. Opt for the simple braided hairstyle or go for twin braids with parting in the middle. Milkmaid braids, waterfall and side-swept braided hairstyles are also trending this holiday season. Ballerina buns are the way to go for a romantic, feminine look. If you are a fan of Old Hollywood then opt for a deep-side swept, high bun style. Whether big or small, messy or sleek, a bun is the perfect style for work and play.

Try something out of the box, instead of immediately reaching for your trusty LBD (Little Black Dress), indulge with this season’s obsession: Red! That’s right: the LRD! It gives off a holidayappropriate vibe that bodes well for mixing with dark opaque tights. So, if you have a little money left in your shopping budget, splurge on the perfect LRD. The holidays aren’t only a festive time to break out pretty party dresses and bold red lipstick. It’s

Espiral am/pm cut wrap dress.

Now that you have mastered your hair, what’s the easiest way to keep your holiday styling stress-free? Stick to the necessities. When you think “festive fashion”, chances are you conjure up images of metallic party dresses and sequined tops. It’s not exactly budget-friendly to splurge on an entirely new wardrobe just for the holiday party circuit stint. You’ve already got the basics — denim, a great black dress, a chunky cardigan — so punch these up with a sophisticated lace top or a bejeweled satin clutch.

also the time of the year to think about that perfect gift for your loved ones. There are all sorts of wonderful things people can give to each other, but nothing is as personal or special as giving them a gift that evokes an experience and creates a long-lasting memory. Forget those reindeer sweaters, clunky toys and stocking stuffers. Shop practical! If you know somebody goes to a specific spa

for a professional treatment, why not give them something they can use all year long. Gift cards in any denomination make the perfect gift. It gives your loved one an opportunity to unwind and totally relax on their time. Go ahead and pamper your loved one with the gift of spa. Hair color, hair-cut, facial or Aveda Stress-Fix™ massage treatment; gift cards allow them to choose how they want to spend their gift and day.



Curls Go By Grazia Monda Cooney & Colleen White

Do you suffer from curly hair that’s dry, damaged, frizzy and just uncontrollable? First, I highly recommend looking at your shampoo. Try using a sulfate shampoo, it’s not only for keratin treated hair anymore, it’s gentle on curly hair too. Use conditioners that moisturize, as your hair needs it more than any other hair type. Then rinse with cool water. After rinsing, use a rack comb and add some “leave in” conditioner to give it some extra moisture, the extra conditioner won’t hurt. Use a style product for those uncontrollable curls, either a gel or mouse will work. Never think that just conditioner will help to tame those curls. Once again, use your rack comb so that it’s evenly combed through. Then twist your curls around your finger. Repeat this step all over so that your hair will set with a soft bouncy curl after and will help to control the fizz. When you are done, re-wrap your hair with a towel for about 15 minutes so that it will give your hair time to set to the curl and absorb the wetness. Afterwards, unwrap and diffuse your hair, but only dry it 50% so allow additional time to air dry. The results will be curls that are more controlled. This is always the best solution to tame curly hair. Then just scrunch hair with your hands, never put a comb or brush to dry curly hair. When it comes to curls, I always recommend a keratin treatment to help you avoid those crazy hair days. Happy holidays from our family to yours!


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The Gift of Health

Yep, it’s that time of the year again and I am sure you are looking for some great gift ideas. Well, look no further.... why not give the gift of health this year? What better way to let someone know you care about them? It is a gift not only from the heart, but for the heart too! Believe it or not, there is something for everyone in the health category and from every price point.

By Carol Burke

Just about everybody wants to become fit and healthy. Most people talk about doing something to improve their health, but only a small minority actually take action. So why not this holiday turn someone’s fitness fantasy into a reality? Give them a holiday nudge, help them help themselves in taking the first step. Here are some great health and fitness gift ideas:

HEALTHblog blog FITNESS 1. Pedometer: this tracks the amount of steps you take in a day. My favorite is the Fitbit. There are many types in the markets place from simple manual monitors, to ones that sync with your computer and smart phone. These more sophisticated versions also can track calories, miles, food and much, much more. They are reasonably priced and fun to have. This is a fitness gift that could benefit just about anyone who can walk. Did you know that you should take at least 10,000 steps each day? 2. A personal trainer: not an inexpensive gift, but if you know someone who is anxious to workout, but has no idea where to start, or has past injuries, this may be a great gift for them. You can purchase from a variety of training packages. My favorite gym for personal training: Power of One in Northport. 3. Nutrition magazine: for someone who needs to update their nutrition knowledge. I highly recommend Nutrition Action Magazine. Inexpensive and chock full of information and get this, NO ads! Just straight info! 4. Zumba or Yoga classes: Do you know someone who loves to dance? Then Zumba might be just for them. You can burn between 350 and 600 calories in these fun, fast moving classes. Or is there someone on your list a little more Zen in nature? They might prefer yoga classes to help them become more balanced and limber. 5. Golf: What woman/man wouldn’t want a round or two of golf? If you live on Long Island, you know that there is no shortage of beautiful golf courses. Being outside, moving around, what better way to spend a day?? Oh and skip the golf cart for a real calorie burn. 6. Hiking Date: This one doesn’t have to cost much at all. What better gift to give then your time and company. Find a local hiking spot and go for it! Long Island is beautiful, so why not go out and explore it. You can even pack a heart healthy lunch to eat while enjoying the view. 7. Rock Wall Climbing: For the more adventurous and fit, try this indoors, so weather is not an obstacle. This may indeed be something new and exciting for someone on your holiday list. They will need a partner, so you can maybe kill two birds with one stone with this one or offer yourself up! As you can see, the list can go on and on and you can be as creative as you would like. The idea is to hopefully get someone motivated and moving. You can give from the most basic exercise form to the most challenging, but there is something out there for everyone. So why not try to give the gift of health to someone you care about this holiday season!

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Preventive Screenings Saves Lives By Marilyn Martinucci

Some may think that preventative screenings for cancers like thyroid cancer, referred to as a “kinder cancer”, are not necessary, and may be over treated. However, it is hard to ignore a diagnosis of cancer regardless if it is considered a “kinder” cancer or not. It is through our vast experience and our life saving testimonials, that we now know how critically important preventative screenings are, and there is no doubt Early Detection Saves Lives. The conventional method of diagnosing thyroid cancer begins when a person has a symptom or feels a lump or nodule, which generally means the disease. In most cases of suspicious nodules we find in our screening, the individuals have no symptoms and are unaware they have a nodule. Our preventative screening program has been able to detect cancerous thyroid nodules 4-7 years before an individual has a symptom, because we are identifying nodules that most do not know they have. The early follow up received, helps identify cancerous cell changes in the nodule before it becomes advanced. Detecting cancer in its early stages can have advantages for the individual’s course of treatment, and the cost. As a result, many of the individuals we screened did not have to go through aggressive treatments like chemo and radiation. Thyroid cancer has been recognized in the medical community as the fastest increasing

cancer in the US, particularly for women. We began implementing a simple sonogram of the Thyroid during our screenings and the findings were significant. Over 500 people had nodules over 1 centimeter in size, which warranted diagnostic scrutiny. This is not something you ignore until you have symptom years later. Women get mammograms each year to identify early cancer, and while removal of benign polyps during colonoscopy is controversial, it is routinely done, so why is it different to pre-screen for thyroid nodules that potentially could be cancerous, especially when the prescreen is non-invasive, requires no prep or harmful radiation, and the screen takes less than 60 seconds. To date, we have had many lifesaving testimonials from people in their thirties, forties and fifties, who had no prior family history of thyroid cancer and who otherwise were healthy. After identifying a nodule, on a follow up visit, we found small tumors. In several of our cases this “kinder cancer” had already spread to the lymph nodes and into the diaphragm. The medical cost of thyroid cancer will reach 20 billion dollars over the next 10 years in the United States alone, along with “hidden” costs like loss time at work due to time off for treatment. Identifying “kinder cancers” early through preventative screening is important to the future health of the individual and the country.

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Comfort Foods By Tami Racaniello

The weather is colder, there are less hours of daylight, and being inside seems way more appealing than bundling up to go outside. As we snuggle under our blanket, in front of a roaring fireplace or wishing we were; our thoughts may turn to food. Something really hearty, filling and comforting would be great, wouldn’t it? When the mind wanders to foods that remind us of our childhood, foods that make us feel cozy and safe, we’re in comfort food mode. Often, we reach for these foods when we are stressed, depressed, unhappy, or when we just want to have that warm fuzzy feeling.

We also may want to eat more, but no need to stock up because hibernation is not a “human body” function, though it may feel like it. What is affecting us is our internal clock or circadian rhythm. We are very attuned to light and dark, and since the sunset is so much earlier, we may not feel as energetic, and want to turn to food more often. People that have rotating work shifts or go through a time change when traveling, also have to adjust their body clocks. To help with the change of season, keep as active as possible, stay in natural light as often as possible, and make sure to drink plenty of water to stay hydrated. Sunlight, not coffee, is the best wake up call you can give yourself. So open up that window and enjoy that natural Vitamin D. On one of those gray days, throw some lights on, put on your favorite music, and dance. Comfort music is just as good as comfort food…with no calories. Eating foods in season will help boost the immune system, and since these are naturally hearty, they give us that comfort food feeling. Veggies such as parsnips, carrots, onions, turnips, garlic, potatoes, sweet potatoes, beets and squashes are fab! Also use more warming spices such as cinnamon, cardamom, ginger, cloves, and turmeric in recipes.

Roasted Winter Salad

Roast beets and kale, and add them into a salad with arugula and chopped onion. Mix in some fig balsamic vinegar and the best extra virgin olive oil you can find. Add in some goat cheese if you like. Roast the beets and kale at the same time to save energy, but make sure to check the kale frequently, as it will cook quickly.

Sunny Split Pea Soup 8 cups organic vegetable broth 2 cups yellow split peas 2 parsnips, sliced 3 carrots, sliced 2-3 cloves of garlic 1 onion, chopped 1 Tbsp coconut oil

Sea salt, pepper and other spices of choice (curry seasoning, or rosemary, bay leaf) Heat coconut oil in a large pot over medium heat. Add the parsnips, carrots, and garlic. Cook for 5-10 minutes, until it just starts to get fragrant. Add the split peas, vegetable broth and seasonings except the salt and pepper, which are best added at the end. Bring to a boil and turn the heat down to low. Simmer, partially covered, stirring occasionally for 1 1/2 to 2 hours, or until split peas are tender. Serve with some freshly grated turmeric, and a sprinkle of nutritional yeast or experiment.


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WOMENMAKING A DIFFERENCE The installation of 2013-2014 SCWBEC Officers and Board of Directors was held on September 12, 2013 at the H. Lee Dennison Building in Hauppauge, presided over by a representative from the Suffolk County Executive’s Office. SCWBEC was established in 1990 by a group of visionary women who recognized the need to establish procurement relationships in private & public sectors. The organization was supported by Suffolk County Office of Affirmative Action which later became the Office of Minority Affairs. Today, SCWBEC, a not-for-profit 501C3, has the same mission. As the organization of its kind on Long Island, we continue to ensure that, Women Business Enterprises are knowledgeable of the purchasing opportunities. Dedicated to helping break the barriers for women business owners and level the playing field, SCWBEC continues to host monthly meetings, workshops and networking opportunities to help women professionals expand their businesses. Over the years, SCWBEC has grown into a highly utilized resource for Women Business Owners and professionals alike. Members consist of businesses

in which women ownership is at least 51%, and whose day to day operations are run by women. Members must operate their business in Suffolk County or reside in Suffolk County. Nassau WBE’s who meet the same criteria may join as Associate Members. SCWBEC Membership is free, relying on sponsors to cover the administrative costs. For information on membership, sponsorship opportunities, workshops and meeting details, visit -Rosemarie Kluepfel, SCWBEC Director of Public Relations, Ph: 631-468-7050


Dana DiDonato’s love of music and radio led her to pursue a degree in Broadcast Journalism at Virginia Tech. She began her career in Virginia at Roanoke’s WXLK with Danny and Zack’s Mornin’ Thang. Dana later moved to Greensboro, North Carolina as part of The Wicker Show on WSMW. While in Greensboro, Dana was also on camera as a correspondent for WFMY, a CBS affiliate as their Entertainment Reporter.


For the last 8 years, Dana has been hosting the morning show on WBLI Radio, Long Island. While hosting, Dana received 2 Gracie Allen Awards for Outstanding Comedy Program in 2006 and Individual Achievement as a Host in 2007. Currently the host of the Dana and Jeffrey Morning Show, Dana looks for the humor and challenges in every day life. Here are the questions I asked Dana, and her candid answers: 1. Why Radio? In an era where people have access to hundreds of cable channels and the popularity of YouTube continues to grow, do you feel radio’s popularity will ever diminish? To me, it doesn’t get better than radio. Despite the fact that now more than ever people have unlimited sources of entertainment at their fingertips, radio’s edge over the competition is that we’re live and we’re local. We’re part of the community that we serve. You’ll see BLI at local schools supporting fundraisers, parades in various towns, and we are a reliable voice committed to giving information when our community faces crisis. I am so proud that BLI was able to pass along vital information to our listeners during Hurricane Sandy and Irene. With so many Long Islanders without power, TVs were useless and of course internet access wasn’t an option. We were able to be there to interview local and state politicians, LIPA, The Red Cross, and of course we handed the airwaves over to our listeners so they were able to encourage each other and meet one another’s needs. On a personal level, the reason I love radio and passionately pursued a career in this industry is because the goal in morning

radio is to entertain by “being yourself”. I get to have real conversations and build a special bond with our audience because we’re sharing our lives and our amazing listeners are sharing theirs’. On the radio I’m not playing a character, there are no

scripts, there are no teleprompters . . . just live air waiting for something to happen- and ANYTHING can happen! As the host of the morning show, my goal is to always offer a unique perspective on relevant,


DANA compelling content that Long Islanders can’t get in other places. Oh yeah, and radio’s free! Are you sold on radio yet?! 2. To date what has been your greatest personal victory and your greatest professional accomplishment, and why? As far as professional victories, my greatest hands-down, has been hosting the morning show on BLI for the last 8 years. I’m honored to be one of the few female leads of a morning show in an industry that has always had a reputation for being a “boys club”. I only know 3 other female hosts in Top 40 morning radio! While women often play a role on morning shows, they are almost never in the lead role. I was thankful for the amazing opportunity when I was asked to take over BLI’s morning show. It’s been my biggest professional challenge and success. As far as a personal victory (I am not joking when I tell you) . . . I feel like the Rocky Theme Song should start loudly playing EVERY NIGHT when I have successfully put two little girls to bed, with baths, clean PJs, brushed teeth, bedtime stories, with full bellies. Some nights it feels like an epic marathon! The combo-victory is being a wife and mom who works a full time job with a crazy schedule. Waking up at 3:30AM presents some unique

challenges. The good news is, after 10 years, my husband hasn’t left me!

3. Congratulations, I understand that you and your husband Kevin are expecting your third child. During your pregnancy with your daughter Joelle Grace, now age 4, and your second daughter, Alannah Hope, now 10 months, you spoke openly about your pregnancies on the airways. Do you feel any aspect of your family life should be confidential? My husband, Kevin has a rule. If it’s true, it’s fair game. He knows that if he screws up, the incident almost always becomes an automatic topic of discussion for the next morning’s show. Sometimes when he knows I’m really upset with him (which isn’t that often!) he tries to get out of it by saying “At least you have a morning show topic now!”

As far as my kids go, I actually had the second one because the first one wasn’t really giving me enough material. KIDDING! Honestly, I’m pretty open about all things in my life that relate to our audience. As my daughters get older, of course I would be considerate of their privacy but for now I feel everything’s fair game. Hopefully my daughter Joelle isn’t mad at me later in life over that bed-wetting incident I talked about weeks ago.

when to say “I’m doing my best but I need some assistance!” Career-wise, I would tell my daughters to figure out what they’re passionate about and pursue it. I would make sure that they understand that they need to work hard, have humble attitudes, and a lack of entitlement. 5. You have teamed up with Gem Magazine LI to support the Arthritis Foundation Long Island chapter, what other organizations or social issues are you passionate about? There are so many organizations about which I am passionate, it’s hard to choose which to highlight! My passion is for people to come through life-altering trials and find healing, wholeness, and restoration.

4. What advice would you give your daughters and the next generation of women entering the workforce trying to balance family and career? Do you feel they will have the same challenges as our generation and those past? As far as the family-career “balance” goes, I still don’t think I have it figured out! But like most families with 2 working parents, we have a unique child care situation and are making it work! When it comes to the next generation of women entering the workforce, I’ve found there are three things that make a great home life and allow you to do your best as a working mom. (1.) You need a spouse who is “for you” and whole-heartedly supportive of you pursuing your passion, otherwise I can’t imagine it working! (2.) The kids come first at all times! Moms know, when you have little ones, being selfish becomes a thing of the past. (3.) Having help is key! Whether it’s family, friends, a babysitter . . . you need to know

A favorite non-profit is Love 146, an organization committed to abolishing sex trafficking and aiding in the restoration process for victims. Right now they are also on the ground in the Philippines doing something in the chaos, making a difference. You can support their good work at www. A great local organization that I support is Long Island Youth Mentoring. Their passion is fatherless children. Their mission is to assist the Christian church on Long Island in the responsible evangelism of at risk youth and their families, providing them with hope through caring relationships and developmental opportunities for the whole person (spiritual, mental, physical, social). LIYouthMentoring. org. We Build New York, a local organization founded post-Hurricane Sandy committed to providing encouragement and hope to those affected by the storm by rebuilding homes at no cost to the home owner. Their organization is run by volunteers with hearts for Long Islanders in need. Their website

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Look years younger with our complimentArY Smile Why did you start this type ofmAkeover business? conSultAtion! I started by consigning items of value from people, and then would sell them on E-bay. Often, when I visit their homes I saw many places stuffed to the brim. This seemed to bother them. I started the business because helping these people was a good match for my personality and skills. I also noticed that ‘getting organized’ and ‘de-cluttering’ were always on magazine covers, so I knew there was a market. I would watch “organizing” shows for fun, and just knew that replicating that was my calling. What was your biggest obstacle? I felt confident in the first few jobs I did. It took a while to feel comfortable in a leadership role when that was needed. Friend us Friend us on on

What or who helped you achieve success? Success was a result of my experience, compassion, being non-judgmental,my efficiency, persistence and energy. What was your biggest achievement or accomplishment? It’s recurring: working with people who are thrilled to find things they’ve lost, and making their space neat and inviting again. Also, the donations to charity I’ve facilitated. Networking tips? Always carry your business cards, share your website and Facebook page whenever possible.

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Surviving The Holidays! By Leah Jantzen Holiday dinners are the times when everyone from your Great-Aunt Ida to Sneakers, the family cat, will bombard you in the kitchen. Whether someone is ordering you to add more nutmeg to your pumpkin pie recipe or Sneakers is meowing and begging for scraps, remember this is life. My first tip: nothing is personal. Strive to be present, not perfect. Someone will always criticize your cooking, hosting, or decorating, but instead of getting upset or letting it ruin your day, brush off criticism. Don’t dwell on what you didn’t do correctly but instead, focus on the positives of the day, not what is missing! Next, develop a strategy. If you know your cousin Suzie will ask why you aren’t married, but living with your boyfriend, be prepared with an answer that will placate her. You don’t want to engage in conversations and discussions that will make you (or your boyfriend) upset. It is best to have something prepared to say before changing the subject quickly. Make the focus on them, not you because most people love to talk about themselves. If you start asking questions, the focus will shift to them. Also, try to use the 80/20 rule: spend 80% of your time listening and 20% talking. Granted, if you are hosting the party, you can’t exactly ask guests to leave, but you can let them do most or all of the talking. Lastly, if a relative or friend pushes your buttons, take a moment to study his/ her behavior. Do you possess any similar behaviors? Usually we are triggered or annoyed by behaviors that reflect something we dislike about ourselves. In the moment, step back and get real with yourself. With the New Year approaching, the holidays offer the perfect time to think about our own actions. Instead of wondering how you will survive, ask yourself what you can learn from each interaction.





Entertainment By Alyse Parise

If you want to get tons of attention in any field, and get paid really well, entertain! Even better be controversial, and publicity will swarm your way. “Be entertaining”, is what I gleaned after hearing a panel discussion from top Social Media Influencers. The hairs stood up at the back of my neck as I heard a “Howard Stern” type panelist, state emphatically that the jerk he is online, is not who he is in real life. If that’s the case, then why did he keep defending himself and saying that he’s really a nice guy? Entertaining is defined as holding attention or performing in an amusing way. We expect hard working actors to entertain us, by playing a role. Whether they play music, sing, dance or act in dramas or comedies, they get paid for using their talent. Yet I know that I’m not always entertaining – that’s simply not my style. So how do I attract crowds to my

business if I’m not inherently entertaining or willing to be controversial for the heck of it? There has to be a better way, a more authentic way to share (both on and offline), that honors who we are, and resonates with our readers. So what about you? How can you get your message across while embracing your style, gifts and talents? Are you inherently humorous or more serious? Is your style light or intense? Are you more outrageous or straightforward? Are you verbose or brief? Do you love playing devils advocate for the hell of it? Are you a closet entertainer who needs a friendly shove? Whether you’re any combination of funny, reflective, flowery, hard-edged, intense, dramatic, satirical or soft; be yourself with no excuses. We don’t all have to be entertaining. Now that would be boring!


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Become More Self Accepting? By Paula Klee Parish The answer is simple: Cultivating Compassion, Letting Go of Guilt, and Learning to Forgive and Accepting Ourselves Unconditionally. Unconditional love is acceptance without limitations. It endures despite unfavorable circumstances. This is the same type of love your canine best buddy would naturally bestow upon you, without hesitation. It is the type of love we should naturally feel for ourselves. The challenge comes when we look to break the habit of constantly judging and criticizing ourselves. Accepting Ourselves Unconditionally Accepting ourselves unconditionally – as you are this very minute with all of our deficiencies – would be automatic had we all grown up with June Cleaver (played by Barbara Billingsley in “Leave it to Beaver’) as our Moms. However, in reality parents do not have the advantage of a script to convey predominately positive messages to our kids. We make mistakes. Unfortunately those mistakes can lead to, at the least awkwardness, and at the worst narcissistic personalities – always blaming others and never accepting fault in any capacity. In order to create a generally supportive, nurturing environment within ourselves, we should surround ourselves with mentors and good people who have our best interest at heart.


Validating Our Ok-ness Letting go of guilt and learning to forgive oneself is essential to overcoming our habit of constantly judging ourselves. It has been said: “You enjoy as much happiness as you believe you’re worthy of.” It has further been said: “Your level of self-acceptance determines your level of happiness.” In my book, The Journey to Be Your Own Best Friend, I talk about how the quality of your thoughts determines the quality of your life. This relates to selftalk – what you say to yourself about yourself – who you are and what you do. Perhaps, more than anything else, cultivating self-acceptance requires developing more self-compassion. You can start by saying positive and productive things to yourself about yourself. Seeking to understand circumstances and learning to pardon ourselves for things that we assume must be our fault, is not a loving attitude toward ourselves. A more favorable way to look at situations is to view them as a spectator – look through the lens of compassion and recognize the conditions by-which choices were made at the time. The key here is to also recognize that we did the best we can with what we knew and believed at the time. What necessitates questionable behavior? Our actions have all been compelled by some combination of background (baggage), and biology – some physiological, emotional, spiritual, physical, or psychological state, which triggered our judgment. In going forward, we should take more

responsibility for the ways in which we have hurt or mistreated others. If we are to productively work on becoming more selfaccepting, we must also do so with compassion and forgiveness in our hearts. That is who you were then – not who you are now… Self-acceptance begins with adopting an attitude of “self-pardon” for our transgressions – actual or perceived… In the end, we may even come to realize that there’s nothing to forgive. The situation is always about doing the best we could, given (1) what was innate (instinctive – how we are hard-wired) in us, (2) how compelling our needs and feelings were at the time, and (3) what, back then, we believed about the situation and ourselves. Our behavior is our way of protecting ourselves from distress. When we only consider ourselves, we only have ourselves to blame when we create barriers to our selfacceptance and the fostering of relationships. Try putting love and compassion first, and see what happens…



AREA RUGS Yes! It’s All About The Size By Evelyn Chin SIZE OF THE COLOR It is about creating an illusion. The more intense the hue, the bigger the colors appear. Bright and bold colors expand, while light and soft hues recede. Area rugs are great instruments in pulling all of the colors together in the interior. They can complement and ground or create contrast and drama in a room. If drama is the intention, use explosive colors to create a focal point. On the other hand, if the intent is for it to blend in with the furnishings, a soft palette is the way to go. There will be times when an intensity of one color is all that is needed to pull everything together and ground the room. If that is the case, choose a hue from the existing color scheme in the space.


SIZE OF THE PATTERN Patterns include plaids, geometrics, stripes, polka dots, flowers, and scenes. Each gives a story. Your choice is about how big a story you want to tell in your space. If the desired look is balance and proportion, the scale of the pattern should not be larger than the shapes and designs on the fabrics in the space. Also, consider the density of the design. A dense and complicated pattern may give an illusion of expansiveness to the area rug. SIZE OF RUG An area rug adds warmth and depth to a room and its’ size divides or defines a space within an interior. Common sizes of area rugs are 4x6, 5x8, 6x9, 8x10, 9x12, and 12x14. Other sizes can be custom made. Area rugs should not serve as runners in the living spaces. Your choice of size will depend on the overall dimension of the furniture plan in your room. For a comfortable size in the living room where the sofa and loveseat meet the walls, the edges of the rug may end halfway under. In the dining room, the borders should extend about 24” to 26” beyond the table. One size does not fit all. Work with the dimensions, designs, and details in your room to create the perfect fit.











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Ability-to-Repay/Qualified Mortgage By Rosemarie Kluepfel In the years leading up to the financial crisis, some consumers were able to secure mortgages that they could not afford to pay back. As a result, some consumers ended up in delinquency and foreclosure. According to the Consumer Financial Protection Bureau, the Dodd-Frank Wall Street Reform and Consumer Protection Act requires lenders to take more into consideration when making mortgage loans. The Bureau’s Ability-to-Repay rule requires lenders to look at a consumer’s financial information to be sure that the consumer can afford to repay the loan.

Qualified Mortgages cannot have the following loan features: • An “interest-only” period, when a consumer pays only the interest without paying down the principal. • “Negative amortization,” when the loan principal increases over time, even though the borrower is making payments. • “Balloon payments,” where as largerthan-usual payments are required at the end of the loan term. However, balloon payments are allowed in certain circumstances. • Loan terms that are longer than 30 years.

This rule applies to most mortgage loans. However, it excludes certain types of loans, like home equity lines of credit, timeshare plans, reverse mortgages, and temporary loans.This rule also creates a category of loans that have certain, more stable features. This category of loans is called Qualified Mortgages (QM). Lenders that make QMs are presumed to have met the Ability-to-Repay requirements.

QMs have limits on the amount of upfront points and fees that the consumer can be charged. The limits will depend upon the size of the loan. Many third-party charges, such as the cost of a credit report, are not included in the limit. QMs also have limits on discount points, which a consumer pays in return for a reduced interest rate.

Under the Ability-to-Repay/QM rule, before you get a mortgage loan, the lender will have to determine you will have the ability to repay the loan by using reliable documents, such as a W-2 or pay stub. A Qualified Mortgage cannot have certain risky features that harmed some consumers during the mortgage crisis.

The Ability-to-Repay/Qualified Mortgage rule is one of many rules that protect you when you get a mortgage. For more information visit: Rosemarie Kluepfel, NYS Licensed Mortgage Specialist NMLS #40311 ph.631-881-5110

This information is not intended to be an indication of loan qualification, loan approval or commitment to lend. Other limitations may apply. ©2013 Fairway Independent Mortgage Corporation NMLS ID#2289. Licensed Mortgage Banker N.Y.S. Banking Department, 1757 Veterans Highway, suite 12, Islandia NY 11749. Equal Opportunity Lender

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Kitchen Remodels AND RESAlE VAluE By Barbara Quitoni Is your kitchen outdated and in need of a remodel? Are you considering it, but wonder how it will affect the resale value of your home, if you should decide to sell in the near future? This is a frequently asked question, as return on investment and/or marketability may be important factors in your decision making. When remodeling your kitchen, a homeowner should choose something to their taste, but not go to any extremes. Do not choose something overly stylized or taste-specific as this can create a big problem when marketing the home, especially high ticket items like kitchens. When selecting cabinets, countertops and flooring stay away from items that may be trendy, as the look can come and go, and may not appeal to the masses when marketing the home for sale years from now. White wood cabinetry is often a good choice as it makes the kitchen appear larger and brighter to potential buyers. White wood cabinets also look clean and are easy to accessorize. Upper cabinets that reach the ceiling, take advantage of wasted space and dust-collecting areas above shorter cabinets, and make the room appear taller. The simple lines of shaker-style cabinets and squared-off edges on countertops are timeless and appealing. For those of you not looking, or unable to totally remodel your kitchen, consider paint and new hardware to add life to lackluster cabinets. Avoid glazing cabinets as that can be a bit too taste-specific and some may see it as looking “dirty”. When remodeling a kitchen, the determining factor may be how long you expect to be in the home. If the answer to that question is at least ten years, then you may want to choose a cabinet style that reflects your taste and style, and coincides with the total look of your house design. Homeowners should have a sense of pride and comfort when they are in their kitchen. “YOU SHOULD LOVE THE KITCHEN THAT YOU COOK IN!”


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Holiday shopping can be challenging when on a strict budget. When faced with a tight and minimal budget, fulfilling your family’s needs and wants over the holidays can be a daunting task. As a financial attorney and single mom of three, I have some valuable tips that can help ease your wallet and stress while holiday shopping.


Holiday Budget By Leslie Tayne

Tip #1: Don’t let Santa be the only one making that list. Get organized by making a list of your own that reflects all of the loved ones you are gifting this year, along with each gift’s price to determine your budget. Tip #2: Comparison shop: Use the internet to compare prices to get the best bang for your buck when making your gift purchases. You may even consider doing this in advance of the holiday season to take advantage of earlier sales. Sales run rampant during the holiday season, but it doesn’t always mean you are getting the best deal. Once you have your eyes on a certain gift, compare store circulars and online retailers to ensure you are getting the best deal. Bookmark a web site and visit it frequently to see if the item eventually goes on sale. Tip #3: Say no to credit: Avoid getting hit with credit card bills post-holiday season by paying with cash or your debit card as much as possible. Using cash also makes it easier to keep within budget. When shopping, bring an envelope containing a budgeted amount of money and leave your cards at home so you do not overspend.

Tip #4: Don’t impulse shop: As you make your way down your gift list, be sure to cross off each recipient. Do not be tempted to impulsively buy additional gifts you had not intended on purchasing originally. This will avoid you from going over budget and will ensure adequate funds are left for tending to all the recipients on your original list. Focus on the task at hand, and only buy items that you originally budgeted for. Tip #5: Sleep on it: Still unsure of what to buy that certain someone? Avoid roaming from store to store, which can lead to impulse buying. Allow yourself time to give some thought over what gift you would like to buy your loved one. Consider shopping online where you are less likely to get distracted and impulse buy while, searching for that perfect gift. Follow these tips so this year’s holiday shopping season will feel like a breeze compared to years’ past and is sure to bring good tidings to all, including your wallet.

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2013 car care

Be sure to winterize your car for the cold weather to prepare for those tough road conditions, especially on long trips to visit family and friends this holiday season. Keep a few supplies on hand as you drive on long stretches of highway. Besides a spare tire and the tools to change a flat, it’s a good idea to keep some bottles of engine oil, washer fluid, coolant, and don’t forget the ice scraper since you won’t be going anywhere if frozen snow is blocking your view. Keep an emergency kit with a flashlight and flares, in case you’re stuck on the road late at night when visibility levels are low. Even if you’re wearing a coat, an extra pair of gloves, boots or a blanket can keep you warm if your heater stops working. Replace worn windshield wipers, check your wiper fluid, and always clear away any snow above and below your windshield wipers as the weight of the snow can damage the wiper mechanism and make winter driving dangerous. Windshields fog up in the winter because moisture from inside the car condenses on the glass. Defrosters solve this problem by blowing warm, dry air over the glass. If your defroster is functioning properly but there’s still a problem with too much fogging, check for air leaks around the doors and windows. Do not let your gas tank run low as cold temperatures can cause condensation to form on the walls of your gas tank. The water will drip down into the gas and eventually sink to the bottom, since water is heavier than gas. If the water finds its way into the fuel lines, it will freeze up, blocking any flow of gas, effectively halting your travel plans so keep your tank full. Drive safely this winter and enjoy the holidays!


The Weather Outside Is


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Yes, soon the snow will be falling and you’ll be shoveling but for an extended weekend you can snuggle by a roaring fire on a romantic getaway in Quebec, Canada. This friendly city offers a taste of France close to home. Yes, you will need a passport to cross the border to visit our Canadian neighbor but once you do, you’ll “feel a world away”. If you have the time, drive the 5oo miles but for a long weekend, I suggest flying. Quebec City, located on the St. Lawrence River, has many faces. Beautiful in any season, this city takes on a shimmering glow in the winter. There is modern Quebec and the Old City, divided into Lower Town (Basse-Ville) and Upper Town (Haute Ville). You can drive between them, ride in a glass funicular (for a small fee) or if you’re feeling up to it, climb one of the 27 staircases. Quebec is the only North American walled city north of Mexico and is a designated UNESCO World Heritage site. Its fort situated high above the river is of interest to history buffs, while the narrow cobbled streets create a European atmosphere. Start your trip with a city tour. This will allow you to become familiar with both modern day Quebec and

the Old Town and you will quickly see that Quebec is very “walkable”, no need for a car. Street performers will entertain you as you walk on the Terrasse Dufferin, a wide promenade, high on the cliff, overlooking the narrow St. Lawrence. Sit for a portrait as you stroll down the Artist’s Alley (Rue de Tresor). It makes for a great souvenir. Lodging and dining options vary. The modern city has numerous well known hotels brands, while the Old Town is home to B&Bs, Inns and the famed Chateau Frontenac. The Chateau is a splurge, but you can feel the splendor and history. If that’s not possible, take the tour of the castle led by costumed guides and have afternoon tea overlooking the promenade and river. It’s the “best seat in the town”! And you can’t leave the city until you’ve indulged in crepes or wonderful French pastries. Spend a morning just taking in the sights and sounds and then stop at a café to warm yourself with a bowl of French onion soup or hot chocolate. You can round out the day with an evening ride in a horse drawn carriage with bells ringing in the cold, crisp air. Even if you don’t parle Francais ------Bon Voyage!!!!!


Quebec City By Carol Nucci

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YOURhoroscope Aries Mars, your ruling planet opposes your sun. You may find yourself in situations that require you to extend yourself and to look at the important people in your life in a new way. FEBRUARY: It may be difficult to be in control this month or have your own way. Step back, observe and watch for the information to unfold. This information may be useful for your creativity.

Taurus Venus your ruling planet is retrograde until the end of January. Opportunities to expand your knowledge via cultures that you are not usually exposed to, may present themselves. FEBRUARY: Monitor your stress levels. Remember the problems you are dealing with, may not belong to you.

Gemini Finalize any financial transactions before the end of the month before Mercury goes retrograde on February 6th. FEBRUARY: Your feelings towards the people around you may not make you feel stable right now, but there will be excitement that is unpredictable.

Cancer Jupiter in Cancer brings opportunities for improving your health. You may need to take time to redo finances, make career changes and find out where possible power struggles are coming from. FEBRUARY: If it doesn’t feel right then avoid or delay business and financial matters. A partnership may present itself.

Leo Try not to over extend yourself. Mars may over stimulate your nervous system so you feel like there is too much to handle at this time. FEBRUARY: Avoid disputes at the workplace. Relationships here may become complicated. Remember it is temporary.

Virgo Asserting your own values when communicating may be an eye opener when it comes to children or a love interest from the past. FEBRUARY: You may take on responsibilities with relatives and siblings. Try not to sign contracts or commit to any partnership issues.

Libra It may not be a comfortable time with Mars in Libra, but it can bring in more balance and energy on a physical level. FEBRUARY: That feeling of heaviness will start to lift by midFebruary. Instead of putting your energies into family, shift to self-expression.

Scorpio Saturn in Scorpio shows obstacles that can be overcome by using persistence and increasing the energy towards your efforts. FEBRUARY: Siblings or neighbors may be the area that needs attending to. Careful handling is always best, especially when communication shows manipulation.

Sagittarius Rebuilding and transforming your sources of income are on your mind. Look to family and friends for ideas. FEBRUARY: Opportunities for learning new skills may present themselves. You may need to make a decision on a major purchase.

Capricorn Happy Birthday! Pluto is transiting Capricorn. Be ready to let go of the worn out habits in your life. This will lead to a rebirth. Uranus is squaring your Sun which may not be expected. Business opportunities may be presented to you or you may be called upon by another person with resources, try to wait till March to sign agreements.

Aquarius More clarity regarding relationships come into light by end of January. These relationships may give you a feeling of Karma. FEBRUARY: HAPPY BIRTHDAY! Details regarding money, bank balances and possessions may need your attention, but through it all remember to tap into your artistic expression.

Pisces You are looking for more meaningful relationships. Making new friends will heighten your social circles. Goals are re-evaluated. FEBRUARY: Watch for impulsive spending. Financial situations can include a reversal in income due to unexpected expenses.

Maryann Dellinger - Astrological, Metaphysical, & Psychic Insight

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Gem magazine long island holiday 2013  

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