Self-Confidence & Etiquette
Pet Etiquette
Etiquette Q & A
The art of a perfect “thank you” note
Spring & Legendary Recipes
Gluten-Free Recipes
Favorite Things!
Spring Planting & Care
Susan Vernick, founding editor etiquettechics@gmail.com
"You're only here for a short visit. Don't hurry. Don't worry. And be sure to smell the flowers along the way.“
Walter C. Hagen
Spring has sprung again; each year, it seems sweeter and sweeter. I love the cozy, cold winter days with a warm beverage and snuggling on a sofa, but not forever! And by March, I am itching (like so many of you) to get outside in the warm spring air (sometimes it is still cold in Upstate NY), get planting and spring cleaning, and embrace the birds chirping and everything coming alive again. We are thankful that our friends at Proven Winner have ten tips and advice to get the most out of the beginning of the gardening season for those of us in certain regions. Such helpful advice as we get our hands dirty again!
Pet Etiquette is also on our minds as we all venture outdoors more. So, park etiquette is relevant and helpful, but also topics like pets and your home with visitors and neighborhood etiquette. It makes for an article of practical advice that underscores our shared responsibility towards our pets and community.
And we love the regular features of our “Favorite Things” and Etiquette Q & A. You will also find our regular section of Legendary Recipes, with a 1960s version of coconut coffee pie and advice on cooking the perfect ham and a gluten-free olive oil cake. Lastly, we have a new approach to “thank you” note inspiration and some tips on self-confidence and etiquette. Who among us cannot use a little self-confidence boost here and there? It's a shared journey we're on. So, enjoy the beauty of spring with everything coming alive again after a long winter, say hello to spring, and savor every moment. Because as we know about spring. “You're only here for a short visit. Don't hurry. Don't worry. And be sure to smell the flowers along the way. “
Walter C. Hagen~Susan
2 Address hardscaping issues.
6 Get a sharp pair of pruners.
1 Take time for a spring inspection
3 Test your garden soil.
7 Put out any necessary supports like trellises and stakes.
9 Plant spring containers and borders.
4 Do a thorough spring cleaning.
8 Divide perennials and shrubs.
10 Be ready to cover plants if freezing temperatures are due.
5 Feed your soil.
Spring is fast approaching, and the dark days of winter will soon turn into the dog days of summer. Most of us will enjoy the outdoors more: at the park, walking in our neighborhoods, and enjoying the outdoors with our ever-loyal K-9 pet. Although we briefly touched on a few indoor etiquette points in our January column, we thought this would be a great time to introduce outdoor etiquette to avoid a pet faux pas or, should we say, a faux paw!
• Obedient Class. Teach your pup manners through a good-quality obedience class. This will make life much easier as you venture outdoors or welcome guests into your home. Basic commands not only cause your friends and family to “ooo and aww” but more than that, they keep your furry friend safe and away from potential harm with commands like “stay” “come” and “sit.” It will also allow for socializing skills to be formed that will help Fido get along with other K-9 kiddos!
• “Scoop the Poop.” When I walk my Scottish terrier, Lucy, sometimes there is a doggie doo-doo that a pet owner neglected to pick up. May I say, always, and without exception, pick up after your pup…scoop the poop!
• Barking. Please properly handle incessant barking to allow us all to keep our sanity. Aside from Chinese drip torture, this may be one that could break almost anyone!
• Jumping. Help your overly excited canine friend learn to be happy-go-lucky without jumping on your house guests and friends. The best way to achieve this is not to allow them to jump on you, their owner.
• Postal workers, Delivery Staff, Repairmen/women. Realizing that allowing your dog to rush at these individuals is dangerous shows poor pooch petiquette
• “Thou shall have your pup properly vaccinated at all times.” Or you risk being struck dead by lightning. Okay, maybe I am exaggerating. But this is a serious issue; many dog vaccinations keep your dog and those around them safe.
• Aggressive dogs need to be correctly identified and handled. Please keep Cujo, umm, I mean Fido, adequately contained, especially away from children and older people.
• Know the color-coding of ribbons on collars and/or dog collars. Even though everyone may not yet be familiar with these, They are:
• Red: Caution-I need space
• Yellow: I like people, not dogs
• Green: Friendly-I like meeting new friends
• Ask before you touch. Kindly ask, “Is your dog friendly, and is it okay to pet your dog?” That keeps all involved safe and at ease.
• Keep on a Leash. Last but never least, keep your dog on a leash where it is designated. Yes, our pups love to run free, and there are areas for that. But, having an unleashed dog approaches a leashed dog and their owner is always somewhat alarming. Please abide by this rule at our parks and other public places. This is the “golden rule” of pet ownership.
As the birds begin chirping and tulips start sprouting, may we enjoy every glorious walk and moment!
Self-confidence, when properly nurtured, should never be confused with arrogance. Selfconfidence is preparedness and discipline and never something that feels uppity or superior in any way. How can we kick-start our confidence levels, especially when we venture into something new and challenging?
1) Speak well: Use proper grammar and keep these words to a minimum: "like," "uhm," "you know," and other fillers.
2) Dress well and for the occasion.
3) Always have good posture
4) Be an expert in social situations (manners, manners, manners.)
5) Be an expert conversationalist by having topics to discuss.
6) Push Yourself! Confidence is built by trying and achieving new things.
Published in 1961
INGREDIENTS
½ C all-purpose flour
½ C sugar
1/8 t salt
1 C strongly brewed coffee
1 C evaporated milk
3 egg yolks, lightly beaten
2 t butter
1 t vanilla
1 1/2 shredded coconut
Coffee Coconut Pie shell (recipe below)
Whipped Cream
Coconut coffee pie shell 114 oz can shredded coconut strong hot coffee and two tablespoons butter or margarine. Start the oven at 350°F. Empty the can of coconut into a bowl. Add enough strong hot coffee to cover barely. But stand for 5 minutes, then drain. Pack coconut dry between layers of paper towels. Rub butter or margarine on both the bottom and sides of a nine-inch pie pan. Press the coconut into the buttered pan thickly to make a pie shell and bake for 10 minutes. Let cool. Used for coffee coconut pie.
DIRECTIONS
Combine flour, sugar, and salt in the upper part of a double boiler over hot water. Add coffee and evaporated milk, continually stirring a little of the hot mixture into the beaten yolks, then stir the yolks into a double boiler. Cook for 2 minutes, stirring constantly. Remove from the heat. Add butter or margarine, vanilla, and 1 cup of coconut mix. Black coal. Pour into pie shell. Garnish with whipped cream, and the remaining half cup of coconut; make 6 servings
•2 teaspoons room temperature coconut oil, for the pan
•½ cup (105 g) extra-virgin olive oil
•½ cup + ¼ cup granulated sugar (divided use)
•finely grated zest of 1 medium lemon
•¼ cup strained fresh lemon juice
•4 large egg yolks
•2 cups blanched almond flour
•¼ cup tapioca flour
•1 teaspoon baking powder
•½ teaspoon salt
•4 large egg whites
•½ teaspoon cream of tartar
1.Position a rack in the lower third of your oven and preheat to 325ºF. Rub the coconut oil with the bottom and sides of a 9-inch springform pan or cake pan. Line the bottom of the pan with a round of parchment paper and rub the parchment with coconut oil. If using a springform pan, place on a rimmed baking sheet to catch any batter overflowing.
2.Combine the olive oil, ½ cup sugar, lemon zest and juice, and egg yolks in a large bowl. Sift in the almond and tapioca flour, baking powder, and salt. Stir to combine.
3.Place the egg whites and cream of tartar in the clean bowl of a stand mixer fitted with the whip attachment (or use a large bowl and electric beater). Whip on mediumhigh speed until foamy, 30-60 seconds. With the mixer running, gradually sprinkle the remaining ¼ cup sugar, 20-30 seconds. Whip until the egg whites are shiny and hold firm peaks when you lift the whip out and hold it upside-down for 2-4 minutes.
4.Mix a large flexible silicone spatula to combine one-third of the whipped egg whites into the batter until combined. Fold in the remaining egg whites until combined and no streaks remain. Scrape the batter into the prepared pan and smooth the top.
5.Bake the cake until deep golden on top, beginning to pull away from the sides of the pan, and the top springs back when pressed lightly, 40-45 minutes. If the cake darkens too quickly, tent the top with aluminum foil. Let the cake cool slightly, then loosen the edges with a small, offset spatula and release the sides if using a springform pan. Invert the cake onto the wire rack and peel away the parchment, then turn the right side up and let it cool completely.
6. Dust with powdered sugar if using, cut into wedges, and serve with cream and berries if you like. The cake keeps well airtight at cool room temperature for 1 day or refrigerated for up to 4 days.
SMOKED HAM (cook-before-eating)
Whole, Bone-In 10-14lbs 18-20 min/lb.
Half, Bone-In 5-7 lbs. 22-25min/lb.
Shank, bone in 3-4 lbs. 35-40 min/lb.
Arm Picnic Shoulder 5-8lbs. 30-35 min/lb.
Shoulder Roll (butt) 2-4lbs. 35-40min/lb.
SMOKED HAM (cooked)
Whole-Bone-In
15- 18-min/lb.
Half, Bone-Ine 5-7lbs. 18-24 min/lb.
Arm Picnic Shoulder 5-8lbs. 25-30 min/lb.
Spiral Cut 7-9lbs. 10-18 min/lb.
BAKE AT 325 DEGREES (160C) AND INTERNAL TEMP OF 145 DEGREES (63C)
Learning etiquette can be acquired by not overwhelming oneself with information, rather one point at a time.”
Etiquette Chics
Are "Thank You" notes outdated and even necessary? Are they old-fashioned? In the fastpaced world of texting, snapping, and even emails, not to mention social media, have they become outdated and unnecessary? I would argue they are not oldfashioned, but fashion-forward!
Why? Here are six simple, inspiring reasons.
It is considerate.
It puts you (as the sender) in a positive light.
It conveys gratitude.
It is considered proper etiquette.
It prevents confusion (did they receive it)?
It prevents hurt feelings based on “Was my gift or gesture (i.e., hosting, etc) even appreciated?
So, be inspired and enjoy the gratification of offering a proper thank you.
By: EH&L Magazine Staff Member
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Questions for our next publication?
Email: etiquettechics@gmail.com
How do I best prepare for overnight guests?
Emily Post suggests that the host spends 24 hours in the guest room. Sleep there, get up, get ready, and spend time throughout the day and evening. See how the bed linens and pillow feel and have a read on the mattress comfort (see if a topper is needed). Assess the sunlight and darkness (is it too bright or too dark) and whether a night light is needed. Be mindful of temperature settings, reading lights, and other conveniences such as books, magazines, bottled water/snacks, towels, and toiletries. Spending time in the guest bedroom and bathroom gives you first-hand knowledge of what works and what does not.
How do I address a friend who interrupts often?
The first way is to start by saying, “Could you allow me to finish?” Then, begin a conversation with them outside of those moments where the interruption occurs. You could have a conversation where you share sentiments like, “I appreciate that you are engaged in our conversations, but sometimes I don't feel like I have a chance to express my feelings when you interrupt me.” See if these gentle reminders help. They usually do so if shared calmly and in a kind manner.
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