Connect Journal: Spring 2015

SPRING 2015 Spring 2015 • $8.95

Journal of Children, Youth & Family Ministry

the

FUNNY

ISSUE

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Master of Divinity

|

Master of arts

Taylor Wilson, M.Div. CYF student

Earn your degree in Children, Youth and Family Ministry at Luther Seminary!

At Luther Seminary, we’re looking at children, youth and family ministry through a different lens. What does it mean to think theologically when considering how to minister to children, youth and their families?

Upcoming classes led by Andrew Root, Kenda Creasy Dean and Tim Coltvet address these new questions.

GC1040-14

“A ministry that turns to the theological seeks to share in the concrete and lived experience of young people as the very place to share in act and being of God. The goal of a ‘theology turn’ in children, youth and family ministry is not to get people to know information, but to seek to minister to the concrete humanity of young people, seeking for God’s action in and through their experience.” —Andrew Root, the Carrie Olson Baalson Chair of Youth and Family Ministry

luthersem.edu/admissions | 1-800-LUtHer3

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UpCoMing C L a sses

Think theologically family, Childhood and the Church: Exploration in Family Ministry | Tim Coltvet

A theological framework for home and congregation ministry will be developed in this course, followed by practical ministry to provide effective ministries across the generations.

Dietrich Bonhoeffer: Youth Worker | Andy Root

Through Bonhoeffer’s writing and history students are given an example of a theological thinker in children’s and youth ministry to emulate.

Collaboratory: turning Hair-Brained ideas into sustainable Ministries | andy root with Kenda Creasy Dean

This course addresses millenials’ concern for sustainability in ministry—social, spiritual and especially financial.

SPRING 2015

PUBLICATION INFORMATION Published by:

ELCA Youth Ministry Network www.elcaymnet.org

Subscription Information:

call 866-ELCANET (352-2638)

or visit: www.elcaymnet.org connect@elcaymnet.org

Design and Layout:

Michael Sladek

Impression Media Group www.impressionmediagroup.com

Managing Editor:

Erin Gibbons

Connect Editorial Board:

Todd Buegler, Tim Coltvet,

Nate Frambach, Sue Mendenhall,

Dawn Rundman, Clint Schnekloth,

Michael Sladek

Cover design & photo ©2015 Michael Sladek www.msladekphoto.com

CONTENTS Welcome!

Todd Buegler

4

The Laughter Recipe

Wes Halula

5

A Funny Thing Happened On the Way To...

Shawna Berg, Kim Suhr, Per Nestingen, Jason Fisher

8

There Was This One Time When...

Dave Berg, Brad Lindberg, Meg Sander

10

Lost in Translation...

Mary Kettl, Constance Mithelman, Ariel Williams, Amy Santoriello

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To Be (Funny) or Not To Be (Funny)

George Baum

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Calendar of Events 17

UPCOMING CONNECT ISSUE THEMES:

The Link Between Youth Ministry and College (Fall ‘15) Human Sexuality (Winter ‘16) Mental Health (Fall ‘16)

ELCA YOUTH MINISTRY NETWORK BOARD Becky Cole: Board Member

Tom Schwolert: Board Member

Rev. Regina Goodrich: Board Member

Valerie Taylor Samuel: Board Member

Sue Megrund: Board Member

Erik Ullestad: Board Chairperson

Dr. Jeremy Myers, AIM: Board Member

Rev. Todd Buegler: Executive Director

The ELCA Youth Ministry Network exists to strengthen and empower adult youth ministry leaders in service to Christ as a part of God’s mission.

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WELCOME!

NEWS BITS

Dear friends,

WE WELCOME REV. JANELLE ROZEK HOOPER into her new role

Whenever people who work with children or youth get together, you can count on it happening.

working in the ELCA churchwide offices

At some point, someone will start telling a story of something they experienced in their ministry.

as the Program Director for Ministry with

And there will be laughter. And then someone else will tell their story—more laughter—and

Children.

then the next, and the next.

Whenever I walk away from these conversations, I feel better. I think there are several reasons

1.

It reminds me that I’m not alone in my work. Others have had similar experiences as I

have had.

REGISTRATION FOR EXTRAVAGANZA 2016, IN ANAHEIM, CALIFORNIA, WILL OPEN ON JULY 1. You can get more

2.

I’ve had the chance to be in a “safe” place to talk and share.

information by going to www.ext16.org

3.

Laughter, especially about things that didn’t go exactly as I’d planned, reminds me not to

ever take myself too seriously.

4.

Laughter fosters friendships, and I can use all of the friends that I can get.

5.

There is something about laughter that heals my soul.

behind this:

So I love hanging out with other people who share in this ministry. It’s fun. And, it’s funny.

THE NETWORK’S 3-YEAR STRATEGIC PLAN COMES TO A CLOSE AT THE END OF 2015.

Your Board of Directors has begun work

The editorial team of the “Connect Journal” wanted to do something completely different with

on its next strategic plan to continue to

this issue. We wanted to hear your stories about ministry experiences that caused laughter.

grow our network of support. Watch for

So we invited contributions of stories. We received many more than we’d hoped for. And we

more information, coming soon!

selected to share those here that caused us to laugh.

So grab a cup of coffee, sit back and enjoy the experiences of your friends and colleagues.

But be careful, because if you read the journal in a public place and find yourself laughing out loud, people might look at you funny.

IT’S STILL POSSIBLE TO REGISTER TO PARTICIPATE IN THE LUTHER500 FESTIVAL, being organized and led by our friends, Lost and

Networked in Christ,

Found. Network members receive a discount for registering. For more information, please go to www.luther500.org

Todd Buegler Executive Director – ELCA Youth Ministry Network Pastor – Trinity Lutheran Church; Owatonna, Minnesota Todd@elcaymnet.org

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SPRING 2015

THE LAUGHTER RECIPE

by Wes Halula As you already know, a sermon and/or article in a Lutheran ministry magazine must start with one of two things: 1) a weighty quote from a vaunted historical figure that all but validates your presuppositions or 2) a funny, pithy quip that breaks down the defenses of your audience and says, “Sure, we’re going to learn something. But we can have fun too.”

Now, if you happen to be writing a serious article on humor, it would be a major coup to somehow accomplish both.

“A joke is a very serious thing.” –Winston Churchill

speech, in the clouds, everywhere. If we don’t find patterns, we get confused, annoyed and detached. But, hilariously, once we find those patterns, our brains all but dismiss them. We instantly start searching for variations. If we don’t find new ways of seeing things, we get bored. First, we seek out stability, then we seek out change, then normalcy, then novelty.

It’s an endless cycle. And it’s how we learn.

I’m not sure I could do much better than quoting Churchill. As demonstrated in this quote, the guy was hilarious and totally serious. I know, he’s a bit of a controversial curmudgeon, but I believe he nailed it on this one. A joke is, in fact, a very serious thing. Let’s discuss.

WHAT’S SO FUNNY? According to Dr. Chaya Ostrower, laughter is the physiological experience resulting from humor. See what happens when scientists and researchers start thinking about humor? They suck every ounce of the fun out it. This is why we can’t have nice things. But seriously, have you ever thought about the physical act of laughing? It’s kind of bizarre. The convulsing, the wailing, the tears…these are the same effects you get from mustard gas. Some people snort. Some whinny. Some can’t catch their breath. You would think we would avoid this activity at all costs. But, for some reason, we love laughing. Most of us do, anyway. Why do we do it? And why do we crave it?

Dr. Ostrower tells us that it’s because of the cognitive experience—wit. To understand wit, we need to understand how we naturally take in the world around us. Our brains are wired to search out patterns. We’re constantly scanning for them—in the carpet, in our

If you laughed at that joke, do not despair.

There is hope for you yet. If, however, you didn’t even get the joke, you have brought shame upon your family.

COMEDY COMES IN THREES. Wit is the expression of establishing a pattern, slamming into novelty and finally landing on a new, unexpected pattern. Hilarious, right?

JOKE TIME. Boom.

blah, he sleeps on the floor. An hour later, a third knock on the door…all of the barn animals want in the house.

OK, I’m going to tell a joke now. But let me preface it by saying I never think jokes are funny. I always see the punch line from a mile away. And since some people perceive me to be a “professional” and a “comedian,” I’m often subjected to well-meaning people who somehow feel obligated to tell me a joke. I try to stop them by saying something like, “FYI, I’m not going to laugh at this joke. It’s not personal. And I think you’re a nice person. I hope I am a nice person. I just don’t laugh at jokes.”

I’m only telling you this because I don’t think the joke you’re about to read is funny either, but I want to show you how jokes work. It’ll help you understand humor, and, if you’re lucky, you’ll never laugh at another joke again.

You’re welcome. OK, here goes…

Three traveling salesmen were out in the country peddling, oh, I don’t know…Luther’s Large Catechism or something…it doesn’t matter. Anyway, their car broke down late at night, miles from the nearest town. They walked to the only farm around and asked the farmer if they could sleep there for the night. The farmer had recently seen a PSA on “stranger danger” so he offered them the barn. They took it. In the middle of the night, the first salesman knocks on the door and says, “I’m sorry, but it’s just too pungent out there.” The farmer says, “Fine. Sleep on the couch.” An hour later, another knock on the door, the second salesman says, “Seriously, dude…the smell.” Blah, blah, 5

That might be a phrase you’ve heard before.

People say it all the time. And it’s true, kind of.

But not exactly. The punch line shows up last in a pattern of three. That’s because three is the shortest path to blowing up our expectations. Let me explain. In the traditional route to a laugh, you have to: 1. Set something up. The first salesman can’t sleep in the barn because it smells out there! Alas!

2. Establish that it’s a pattern. The second salesman can’t sleep in the barn, either?! Things are undoubtedly afoot!

3. Destroy what we think is the pattern. Hark!

Yonder knocks the third salesman! Those must be some stinky barn animals—WHAT?! It is the ANIMALS who are at the door? But why? EUREKA! It is not the animals that doth waft a mighty stench powerful enough to disrupt slumber! Nay, it is the THIRD SALESMAN! Hilarious.

And that’s how every single joke works.

You set up the audience with what they will naturally conclude is the pattern, then on the third go-round, you show them that there is a pattern, but it’s not the one they thought it was—the “old switcheroo.”

Once you see the joke matrix, you can’t un-see it. And jokes become annoying. Now, I’ve been railing on traditional jokes, the kind you get in fourth-grade joke books, but I’m not a comedy elitist. Just ask my wife what it’s like to be in the room with me when “America’s Funniest Home Videos” is on. It’s humiliating—for her. I have no shame. Babies and puppies are

hilarious.

I love humor. I love laughing. I love making other people laugh. And, heck yeah, this pattern of threes can be spectacularly funny. Stand-up comedians use it. Sitcoms use it. RomComs use it. The whole world uses it. It’s great for getting a laugh. This is a very powerful tool.

HUMOR MAKES US THINK. Obviously not all humor makes us think. But the good humor does. You know—the funny humor. Let’s face it, though, humor is subjective. What makes you laugh is, in your humble opinion, what’s empirically funny, forever and ever, amen. Anything more “highbrow” than your taste is elitist puffery. Anything more base than your taste is mind-numbing pabulum. I get it. It’s like how we all think that people who drive faster than us are dangerous maniacs and those who drive slower than us are brittle old ninnies who should have their driving privileges revoked.

But no matter where we land on the “taste spectrum,” there is a common element to

what we find funny: surprise. When you laugh, it’s usually because something, in some way, surprises you. And that surprise makes you pause and re-evaluate your presuppositions.

We’ve settled comfortably into a pattern and then something (a puppy) or someone (a baby) comes along and disrupts it. Sometimes that makes us angry. Sometimes that makes us laugh. Sometimes both. It’s why the court jesters often lost their heads.

he’s greeted by a robot dressed like former UN Secretary General Boutros Boutros-Ghali? Robo-Boutros throws glitter on the farmer and skips away giggling. Well, heck. You didn’t see that coming, did’ya? Of course not because it’s completely obtuse. While I personally find this “joke” funnier than the original, I must concede that it is technically not funny. In fact, it’s only funny in the “Wow, that’s a stupid joke!” sense. That’s not a sustainable lifestyle, friends. Don’t go chasing waterfalls.

AND NOW FOR SOMETHING COMPLETELY DIFFERENT. Like any good rabble-rouser, teacher, philosopher, parent, theologian or preacher, a good comedian has a way of exposing our assumptions, even if we didn’t know we had them.

Yes, the comedian does this by showing us something else, but—Mission Critical—that “something else” has to make sense. There still has to be a pattern! Throwing a curve ball is not the same thing as throwing a wild pitch.

Let’s go back to our sample joke. What if the farmer goes to the door on the third knock, expecting to find the last salesman and instead,

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IT’S FUNNY BECAUSE IT’S TRUE. AND BECAUSE IT’S FUNNY. What is funny is having our pattern disrupted and then realizing that there is another, far more compelling, more grounded, more honest pattern staring us right in the face…and we missed it. The humor comes from realizing that we were wrong—that the truth was there, in plain sight, and we drew the wrong conclusions.

What separates the funny from the angerinducing is a little thing called “mirth.” Laughter

SPRING 2015

is the physiological experience of humor. But laughter can be caused by other things. Like getting tickled. Or being a “nervous Nelly.”

And wit is the cognitive experience of humor.

Something can be witty without being humorous—it can be just plain mean. But mirth, my friends, brings it all home. Mirth is the delight.

I think God’s fingerprints are all over mirth.

First of all, God made both puppies and babies.

Secondly, God created “America’s Funniest Home Videos.” Thirdly, and I should have mentioned this earlier, God created kitties.

I hope this doesn’t make the biblical scholars cringe, but I think Jesus had to be good at making people laugh. No doubt, there were some laughs when he called the Pharisees “white-washed tombs.” In fact, I’d bet there were some Pharisees who thought it was funny. He might have gotten a few “yucks” with any of his parables. Old wine in new wineskins? Not so funny to us, depending on how much wine we’ve had, but probably a laughriot to people who were making wine.

Jesus regularly pointed out the flaws in people’s thinking, in their embedded patterns of living, by showing them something else.

Like the “rabble-rouser-teacher-philosopherparent-theologian-preacher-comedian” that he was, Jesus offended a lot of people. But I don’t doubt for a second that he also made people laugh. Of course he did. They were being shown a radical new pattern, seeing what was set up from the beginning of time, right in front of them and experiencing what had to be the biggest shovelful of mirth the world has ever seen. According to Dr. Ostrower, that’s a recipe for a laugh.

So…go ahead. Take humor for a test drive. Try it out on your unsuspecting youth group or congregation or family. If you’re desperate for material, start with the joke about the barn animals. You can have it. Just, please don’t give me credit for it.

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Wes Halula is a writer, director, speaker and comedian. Wes wrote and directed the ”Mobile Experience” for Compassion International, has written several award winning feature films and, most recently, was a staff writer on Dreamwork’s Emmy-nominated show “VeggieTales: In The House.” Wes lives in LA with his super-smart wife and two adorable children.

A FUNNY THING HAPPENED ON THE WAY TO...

One of my first years in youth ministry, I took a group to the ELCA Youth Gathering in New Orleans. I carefully planned our route and decided, along with some of our advisors, that we wanted to have one night on our trip where we stayed in a hotel and ate at restaurant that wasn’t fast food. I made reservations at a hotel in St. Louis, but I chose not to make a dinner reservation, as I didn’t really think it would be that difficult for us to find a place.

I have had kids leave many things behind after being at camp, but this was a first. After an overnight confirmation retreat, I received a call from a father of one of the boys—we’ll call him Timmy.

I was wrong.

“Hey Kim, I’m just calling because Timmy forgot something at camp,” the dad said.

“What is it? Maybe I can track it down,” I responded.

Our hotel was in the business district in St. Louis, and pretty much everything in the area closed at 5 p.m. A couple of leaders and I wandered around the area, looking for a restaurant.

We stumbled upon a place that had the menu posted outside the door. It seemed as if the prices were reasonable, so we went in and asked if they could accommodate a group of 40 for dinner. They assured us that they could.

We gathered up the youth and went to dinner. Everything was going well when one of the high school boys went to the bathroom. When he came back, he looked a little…frazzled.

I noticed a buzz begin to go around the table. Suddenly, several more boys had to go the bathroom.

I was new to youth ministry, but I wasn’t dumb. Everyone knows boys generally don’t go to bathrooms in groups.

I told all the kids to stay seated at the table and headed toward the restrooms. As I rounded the corner, my jaw dropped to the floor. We were smack dab in the middle of a strip club.

There were naked women dancing on poles—naked women! EVERYWHERE! The blood drained from my face as I realized…I had taken my youth group to a strip joint.

As I walked back to the tables, I began to write my letter of resignation in my head. All the youth were eating, and there were no other restaurants open, so I calmly informed the group that no one else was to leave the table. I whispered what was happening to the other adult leaders and went outside to make the call I was dreading… the call to my Senior Pastor.

“Umm… Hi,” I stammered. “So…we are here in St. Louis, and umm, everyone is safe, but, umm...I accidently took the kids to a strip club. Only one kid saw anything, and they are all finishing their dinner, and then we are going to leave. So, I’m really sorry. I just wanted you to hear it from me before you heard it from someone else. ” I held my breath. Silence. Then laughter.

Breathing a huge sigh of relief, I sent up a quick prayer of thanks to God for blessing my senior pastor with a good sense of humor. Amen.

Shawna Berg Director of Confirmation and Stepping Stones Ministry Incarnation Lutheran Church, Shoreview, Minnesota sberg@incarnationmn.org facebook.com/shawna.h.berg

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“Oh, his glass eye,” he said.

My mouth dropped open, but no words came out.

“It’s okay, it happens all the time,” the dad continued.

We burst out laughing. But as I searched for the eye, all I could think was, “I didn’t even notice he didn’t have his eye in!”

Kim Suhr Diaconal Minister for Community, Youth & Family Ezekiel Lutheran Church, River Falls, Wisconsin ezekiellutheran.org Former Christian Ed Coordinator at Our Saviour’s Lutheran Church in Chippewa Falls, Wisconsin

SPRING 2015

How Youth Ministry led me to clean the floor of a coach bus with wet wipes…

Packed into a 15-passenger van, my youth and I were riding high, after an amazing weekend retreat. After an hour or so, boredom set in. “Let’s play Van Twister,” one youth said, and the group agreed. There was a short debate, and then the rules were set.

On our mission trip last summer, 50 youth and I rode in a bus from Minnesota to Pennsylvania, about a 22-hour trip. On the return trek, one of our young women came and sat next to me in the front seat.

“Hey,” I said, “What brings you up here?” It was then that I noticed that six other young women had taken extra seats in the front few rows as well. I was thinking they had all come up to be near me and to maybe share in their ponderings about one of our Bible study texts. Alas, I was wrong. “The smell,” the youth said, “it REEKS back there! It smells like urine!”

Blue-window Green-floor Yellow-person Red-roof The youth sitting shotgun was in charge of the spinner, and pretty soon, there were arms and legs stuck all over the inside of the van.

I had divided the bus into men and women. As I stood up to look at the state of the seating, all the boys were in their seats, yet the first two rows of women were vacated. They were either lying on the floor of the bus, sitting on other laps, or finding any way to be as far from the boys as possible. So, I went to the back of the bus to see what on earth the young men had done to cause such a stench.

After everyone was properly limbered up, the youth decided to evangelize to our highway companions. They whipped up a “Honk if you love Jesus!” sign and boldly smacked it against window for every car to see. Honks from passing cars and semi-trucks filled the air. After awhile, a Ford Explorer pulled up next to us and tried to get our attention. I figured they had made a sign about loving Jesus, too, so I began to blare the horn.

When I got back there, some of the upper classmen were counting (29! 30! 31! 32!) just as the bathroom door burst open and a freshman tumbled out gasping for air. “Oh come on,” the youth shouted, “you only lasted 32 seconds!”

I laughed. My youth laughed. The people in the Ford Explorer laughed. Encouraged, I beeped the horn with more enthusiasm. I laughed more. So did my youth. And so did the people in the Ford Explorer.

A putrid and nearly tangible stench of urine attacked my nostrils.

I peered into the bathroom to see that the toilet had overflown (inspired by our newfound excitement over Jesus’ calling on our lives) and urine had spilled out all over the bathroom floor and the last few rows of the bus.

“Jason,” I heard the youth next to me say between chuckles, “Read the sign.”

Wiping tears of laughter from my eyes, I glanced at the sign in the vehicle next to us, only to see, “Honk if you love weed!” scrawled across white paper.

“Per,” the boys screamed, “Josh lasted 52 seconds in the bathroom with the door closed. Can you beat him? Try it! TRY IT!”

What can I say? We were all riding high…just not that kind of high.

There comes a time in your ministry when you realize that it is a make-or-break moment. We had 12 hours left on the now-rancid bus. I had two choices: Get upset and perhaps have the most miserable trip in memory, or embrace it and fondly tell of the time the toilet was given a little more than it could handle. I lasted 53 seconds.

Jason Fisher Director of Youth & Family Ministry Good Shepherd Lutheran Church, Champaign, Illinois jason@gslc-cu.org gslc-cu.org

Per Nestingen Director of Youth & Family Ministry Farmington Lutheran Church, Farmington, Minnesota Former youth worker at Light of Christ Lutheran Church in Delano, Minnesota @PersPersona Per@farmingtonlutheran.com

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THERE WAS THIS ONE TIME WHEN...

The scene: The ELCA Youth Gathering in New Orleans, 2012.

Without missing a beat, the improv was on. I answered very matter-offactly, “At this point…I mean…now it’s really not so much the itching, as the burning.”

New Orleans is a city with an unparalleled soundscape—from the intoxicating sound of Jazz music on parade to intoxicated revelers stumbling down Bourbon Street. Layer on approximately 35,000 screaming, hormone-enslaved adolescent Lutherans from around the country, and the blare of an already bustling city instantly reaches a decibel of a Spinal Tap concert at level 11.

—Ding— The doors open. Some people get off the elevator. The doors shut. The conversation continues.

Where does one go for silence?

He pressed, “Do you want to borrow some of my ointment?”

Your hotel room? Rookie mistake.

I deadpanned, “Does it help with pus and discharge?”

The bathroom? In a city where the staple is Cajun red beans and rice?

Please.

He answered, “No, but it will address the infection.”

—Ding—

Clearly the only place one finds silence at the National Youth Gathering is on an elevator. On a normal day, in a normal setting, elevators demonstrate a convergence of societal norms and awkward personal space issues. At the National Youth Gathering? The elevator is a hot, humid petri dish, crowded beyond capacity and infinitely more awkward than your normal everyday lift. Also, for the record, it smells a lot like teen spirit.

The doors open. More get off the elevator. The doors shut.

(As a side note, about three of my other youth were on this crowded elevator with us, and at this point, they could barely contain their laughter. They fidgeted and stared straight down at their shoes.)

I continued, “Cool. I’ll give it a try.”

Nevertheless—it. Is. Quiet.

We let the awkwardness settle in for our elevator companions for another stop before we reached our floor and quietly exited the elevator.

When the doors shut behind us, there was a burst of hysterical laughter by everyone in our group.

That is, until I boarded our hotel elevator with one of my youth, a guy named Malcolm.

It was the usual scene. We waited our turn to ride the elevator at the end of the evening. Everyone was soaked from the torrential rains of the first evening of the gathering. We were overheated, filthy, and the collective level of exhaustion had put everyone in the manic “overtired” state.

An adult from another group on our floor shushed us.

So I feverishly scratched the back of my neck and went to bed.

Dave Berg, Pastor Gloria Dei Lutheran in Rochester, Minnesota Berg@Gloria-Dei.com @DavaBerg

We crowded on to the elevator and as if on cue, the sound falls to nothing.

Awkward silence.

With elevator muzak playing quietly in the background and the mirrored finish of the elevator doors cruelly making us all examine how truly awful we looked, Malcolm asked in a tone loud enough to be heard by all, but quiet enough to sound like a personal conversation, “Hey Dave, how’s your rash?”

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SPRING 2015

The year was 1995, and there are two things you should know: 1) It was my first year as a youth director, and 2) The Batman ride was introduced to Six Flags over Magic Mountain.

Hide and Seek?

About 30 years ago, before cell phones, when my body was far more flexible than it is now, I had a little incident, the story of which is still shared today.

Our group was attending Six Flags. I was new and wanted the youth to know I could relate to them (AKA think I was cool), so I decided to suspend my “no going upside-down” rule at amusement parks. After a few warm-up rides, we decided to ride Batman. As we waited…and waited…and waited, I became increasingly confident this was where my life would end. When we finally reached the front of the line, I was assigned a seat in the first row.

It was time for our annual Christmas babysitting fundraiser. Each year, the high school youth babysat kids, while parents shopped for Christmas gifts. This particular year, we hosted the event at my friend Angie’s house.

As the safety bars came down, the attendant (I’m pretty sure she was 12) gave a half-hearted, one-finger tug on the bar to make sure I was safe, and then the floor dropped out from below us. “Where am I supposed to brace my legs as I crash to my death?” I wondered. But it was too late. The train had started to climb. Click…click…click...like a clock counting down to my imminent demise.

As the evening progressed, the kids really wanted to play Hide and Seek. The youth partnered with the younger kids, and we all set off to hide. I climbed upstairs to search for the perfect spot.

Opening the door to the linen closet, I crawled inside and squeezed myself into the space underneath the shelves. My competitive side swelled with pride. “They’ll never find me here,” I thought. Famous last words.

As I passed the summit, there was a brief pause when I got to look ahead to the very spot I would die, and then...whoosh! We were off at approximately 7 million miles per hour.

After awhile, my legs began to cramp. Then my arms. Then my neck.

I tried to wiggle around, and that’s when I discovered I was stuck.

“Hello?” I called out. No answer. “HELP!” I yelled. Nothing.

Just before we crashed into the ground, the train shot upward in a death-defying loop-de-loop, followed by a death spiral corkscrew.

With each loop-de-loop, I felt a pressure growing inside me, a pressure that needed release—I wanted to cuss.

Around 11 pm, I heard someone outside the door. Frantically, I banged my head against the door and began yelling for help. When the door opened, Angie stood there with a broom in hand and a perplexed look on her face. Apparently, she thought my frenzied banging and screaming was mice. “What are you doing in our linen closet?” she asked.

But, surrounded by impressionable youth (and their parents), I knew I had only one choice. Taking a deep breath, I screamed, “MOMMY! I WANT MY MOMMY!”

“Playing Hide-n-Seek,” I replied. We burst into hysterical laughter as she pried me from the closet.

So much for being cool.

Now I just stick to hiding in plain sight.

Brad Lindberg, Dad Peace Lutheran Church, Tomah, Wisconsin @1Cor9_24

Pastor Meg Sander Children, Youth, and Family Pastor First Lutheran Church, Kearney, Nebraska firstlutherankearney.org

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LOST IN TRANSLATION...

Plagues Are Part of the Story When I picked up my friend Siri at confirmation the other night, I was delighted to find out that middle schoolers at Custer Lutheran were learning about plagues.

I would like to say up front that I do not wish for anyone to be visited by boils, but I had been humiliated by Siri’s math textbook earlier in the week— to the point where Siri had looked at me with pity and then asked if I could make her some Ramen noodles —and now, at last, here was some homework I could help with.

The plagues, you may remember, were a series of unfortunate events that God dropped on Egypt after Pharaoh failed to respond to organized labor’s demand for better working conditions at the mud brick factory. None of the plagues lasted very long—like television shows featuring the Kardashians, each had a beginning, middle, and end—but each did considerable damage to the Egyptians, a people who already wore a camel-load of mascara and walked funny.

“I know the plagues!” I said, shouting a little in my enthusiasm. I started to list them: “There was death! And blood! And hail!” After seven years of Catholic school, I was well versed in Old Testament tribulations.

“There were flies and gnats and lice,” I continued, thinking this must have been a particularly unpleasant plague for a civilization where everyone, even men, wore mini-skirts, fake beards, and had hair like Marlo Thomas in “That Girl.”

“And frogs!” I added.

“And Lucas!” Siri said.

“Lucas who?” I asked. Maybe she was referring to some boy in her class who was a plague.

“Lucas. The bug that ate all their crops.”

I spent a few moments trying to clarify insect classification—all the while picturing large, hungry locusts wearing “Hello, my name is Lucas” stickers on their lapels—but then moved on to pointing out that LO-custs would have devastated the Egyptian crops. Way worse than anything Lucas could do.

Mary Kettl Teacher, writer, camp horse wrangler Grace University Lutheran Church, Minneapolis, Minnesota marykettl@hotmail.com marykettl.com

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Helping young people understand the trinity can be tricky. Luckily, Here We Stand uses a pretty helpful water analogy. We spent quite a bit of class time debating which form of God matches up with each form of water: ice, liquid, or steam. Out of the corner of my eye, I spotted a hand in the air. “Yes?” I asked, turning to one of my eighth graders.

“The trinity is kind of like the three-in-one stuff you use in the shower,” he said, “shampoo, conditioner, and body wash all in one!”

Apparently, our God is a God of efficiency.

Constance Mithelman Youth Ministry Leader Hope Lutheran Church, Temecula, California hopetemecula.org

SPRING 2015

The first summer I took my youth to confirmation camp was my first church camp experience ever. I had no intention of tackling the climbing wall or zip line, but my youth group harassed me into it. As I stood looking at the harness—which seemed to be a tangled up mess of random straps or some horrifying torture device (I’m still not sure that it isn’t both of those things)—I realized I needed help.

While working on an art project with a group of preschoolers, I asked Adam, age 4, about his picture. “This is when Jesus fled to the desert,” Adam said.

“Why did Jesus go to the desert?” I asked him.

“Jesus ran into the desert to Egypt because the king was trying to kill him. But when he got to Egypt, there were too many Hebrew slaves,” Adam said, “so Jesus started the Underground Railroad.”

One of my youth took pity on me and asked, “Hey Ariel, need some help?”

Exasperated, I held out the harness and said, “Just do me!”

I guess that’s what happens when Lent and Black History Month overlap!

As soon as the words came out of my mouth, I gasped, “Oh God! I just said…just do me! Oh SHIT! I just said, oh GOD!”

Amy Santoriello, Diaconal Minister Director of Faith Formation and Outreach Zion Lutheran Church Penn Hills, Pennsylvania amybethsantoriello@gmail.com

I flung the harness down next to my youth who was balled up laughing on the ground and begged him, “Please don’t share this at church!”

“Don’t worry,” he responded. “I like you too much, and I’m afraid they’d fire you.”

Ariel Williams Former Director of Youth & Family Ministries, Emanuel’s Lutheran Church, Seguin, Texas Current Student at The Lutheran Theological Seminary at Gettysburg vivajavaluia@gmail.com javaluia.wordpress.com facebook.com/sassyariel80 @sassyariel80

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TO BE (FUNNY), OR NOT TO BE (FUNNY) “I don’t get it,” said the young man. “Is y’all supposed to be musicians, or is y’all supposed to be comedians?”

You can imagine our surprise. It’s one thing to be asked, “Is y’all supposed to be cats or dogs?”

But musicians and comedians don’t seem entirely separate categories, to us at least. We wondered for a long time if we were missing something in his question. And we asked around, trying to figure out the, admittedly, foreign-to-us southern Evangelical culture in which we were swimming that weekend. It wasn’t just this one student who held this oneor-the-other understanding. The notion was infused in the air of the event. People wanted a clear distinction between their comedians, musicians, preachers, friends, hotel staff and so on. Everyone was to have a role and play it to the hilt. A preacher is not expected to pick up a piece of garbage off the beach, and a comedian should not talk about God. Upon leaving the crucible of that weekend, we have since found it’s just a matter of degree when it comes to the silos of faithful vocation.

Sometimes the organizers of a youth gathering will flat-out tell us that the reason they are having us is because they want the students to see that Christians can have fun. This, apparently, is a new teaching. (I guess they’ve never seen the Laughing Jesus painting, which is conclusive proof of, well, something.)

Which begs the question: Why would anyone assume that Christians can’t have fun? Or that a comedian can’t play an instrument? Or that an athlete can’t be a scholar? Or that anyone

can’t be anything God intends them to be?

How could it be that our default setting as the people of a creative and expansive God would lead us toward smaller, limited, smallminded categorization? I realize it’s a terribly rhetorical question, fraught with systematical landmines. Nonetheless, I can’t help asking it over, and over, and over.

All of which leads me to this simple point: Our band is called Lost And Found. We always capitalize the letter A in And, for two reasons.

First, it’s our middle name. You wouldn’t want to be called Mary louise Jones, right? I mean, especially if your name were Harold Thomas Smith. But you get the point. It’s part of the band’s name. But secondly, and perhaps more importantly, it’s the most crucial word in our band’s name. We are not once Lost and now Found. We are not some days Lost and some days Found. We are Lost And Found, at all times and in all places.

Simul iustus et peccator was another option for our band name, but that was obviously already taken by a thrash metal band out of a seminary in St. Catharines. And we found it was easier to arm wrestle over naming rights with people who make directory signs at the mall, conceding “You Are Here” to them for keeping Lost And Found for ourselves. Though we then cleverly wrote a song called “You Are Here” just to spite those same makers of mall signs.

See? You really can be more than one thing!

Lost And Found. We all are.

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By George Baum George Baum is one half of the band Lost And Found (speedwood.com), and is also a supply priest in the Episcopal Church, the father of two and the husband of one.

SPRING 2015

EXTRAVAGANZA 2016 Intensive Care Courses: February 4-5 Main Event: February 5-8 Hyatt Hotel – Anaheim, CA

Registration Opens July 1, 2015 at www.elcaymnet.org 15

THANK YOU FOR YOUR SUPPORT! THRIVENT CHOICE The Network is grateful to its individual donors and organizational partners for supporting its mission and vision for the future. The Network is funded in 3 ways:

The Network!

N AGA RAV EXT

Extravaganza fees cover approximately 2/3 of the cost of the event. The remaining 1/3 is covered by organizational and partnership gifts.

Thrivent Members Can Now Choose The ELCA Youth Ministry Network is now a recipient of Thrivent Choice

extravaganza

ION

operating expenses

Funding for developing our future vision comes from financial gifts from individuals, and organizations.

RAT

dollars can go to the Thrivent choice

IST

Network operational costs are covered by membership dues.

REG

ZA

dollars! Folks who have access to these

Connect Journal • Staff • Publicity • Etc...

page and designate the Network as the recipient of your dollars! It’s a great way to support the Network!

MEMBERSHIP DUES To make a donation, please go to: www.thrivent.com/thriventchoice . Log in,

These individuals have made a special gift during the current fiscal year to help further the mission of the Network. We are grateful for their support!

and from there you can search for the ELCA Youth Ministry Network in the listing of approved organizations, and make your designation! Thank you to all

Rachel Alley

who have chosen the Network for your

Wendy Black

donations so far!

Eric Carlson Paul Clark Patty Erickson Megan Floyd Kim Krummel Leann Kruse-Arcia Sue Tyler

These organizations have taken the extra step to become Network partners this year to provide support for the Network. We are grateful for their support!

Gold Partners: Augsburg College ELCA Youth Gathering GSB - Mike Ward Mission Investment Fund Luther Seminary Thrivent Financial Unify Church

Silver Partners: Augsburg Fortress Camp Frederick Flathead Lutheran Bible Camp Lutheran Retreats, Camps and Conferences LutheranColleges.org Lutherans Outdoors in South Dakota Luthercrest Bible Camp Lutheridge+Lutherock Nebraska Lutheran Outdoor Ministries Portico Benefit Services 16

Region 3 Camping Network Sky Ranch Lutheran Bible Camp Trinity Lutheran College Trinity Lutheran Seminary Upper Missouri Ministries Wartburg Seminary Wheatridge Foundation Youth Encounter Youthworks

SPRING 2015

CALENDAR OF EVENTS: www.elcaymnet.org/calendar Start Date

End Date

7/15/15 6:00 PM

Name

Location

Contact Person

Email

7/19/15 11:00 AM ELCA Youth Gathering

Detroit, Michigan

ELCA Gathering Office

gathering@elca.org

Sr High Youth, Adult Volunteers, Adult Professionals

8/2/15 6:00 PM

8/7/15 6:00 PM

Lutheran Summer Camp

Victory Bible Camp

Jane Hanson

Jhansonak@aol.com

Jr High Youth, Sr High Youth, Adult Volunteers, Adult Professionals

8/14/15 12:00 PM

8/15/15 2:30 PM

Do What Matters Workshop

Salem Lutheran - Peoria, IL

Jill Goldhammer

jgoldhammer@salemofpeoria.com

Adult Volunteers, Adult Professionals

8/23/15 5:00 PM

8/25/15 2:00 PM

Region 3 Practice Discipleship Retreat

Luther Crest Bible Camp, Alexandria, MN

Kristina Johnson

lyo@cord.edu

Adult Professionals

9/1/15 1:00 PM

9/1/15 2:00 PM

Story of Self and Other

Webinar

Catherine Anderson

catherine.anderson@nemnsynod.org

Adult Volunteers, Adult Professionals, Parents

9/19/15 12:00 PM

9/19/15 5:00 PM

Story of Service & Story of Faith Community

Ebenezer Lutheran Church Lake Stevens, WA

Bryant Williams

bryant.williams86@outlook.com

Adult Volunteers, Adult Professionals, Parents

10/6/15 1:00 PM

10/6/15 2:00 PM

Story of Service

Webinar

Catherine Anderson

catherine.anderson@nemnsynod. org

Adult Volunteers, Adult Professionals, Parents

11/3/15 1:00 PM

11/3/15 2:00 PM

Story of Faith Community

Webinar

Catherine Anderson

catherine.anderson@nemnsynod.org

Adult Volunteers, Adult Professionals, Parents

2/5/16 9:00 PM

2/8/16 2:00 PM

Extravaganza 2016

Hyatt Regency - Orange County, CA

Todd Buegler

todd@elcaymnet.org

11/3/15 1:00 PM

1/3/15 2:00 PM

Story of Faith Community

Webinar

Catherine Anderson

catherine.anderson@nemnsynod.org

Adult Volunteers, Adult Professionals, Parents

2/4/16 3:00 PM

2/5/15 6:00 PM

Intensive Care Courses 2016

Hyatt Regency - Orange County, CA

Todd Buegler

todd@elcaymnet.org

Adult Volunteers, A dult Professionals

2/5/16 9:00 PM

2/8/16 2:00 PM

Extravaganza 2016

Hyatt Regency - Orange County, CA

Todd Buegler

todd@elcaymnet.org

Adult Volunteers, Adult Professionals

17

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SPRING 2015

CALLING THE NEXT GENERATION OF LEADERS

AUGGIES

Angela Bonfiglio ’13 serves as the director of youth programs for Redeemer Lutheran Church in Minneapolis, and it’s ministry, Venture North Bike Walk and Coffee, where she organizes youth development, community engagement, and job training opportunities.

WE ARE CALLED

Youth and Family Ministry Set in the heart of Minneapolis, Augsburg College is a liberal arts institution guided by the faith and values of the Lutheran church.

•

Our interdisciplinary program weaves together bible, theology, sociology, psychology and ministry classes.

•

Our hands-on internship and practicum opportunities are offered in a variety of settings.

•

Our intentional diversity and urban location allows leaders to develop in a real-world setting.

If you know a student who should be exploring a call to ministry, introduce them to us at augsburg.edu/yfm.

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1-800-788-5678 admissions@augsburg.edu

ELCA Youth Ministry Network 150 Oakwood Lane Owatonna, Mn 55060

the

FUNNY

ISSUE

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