DGO Magazine June 2023

D GO

Editor Angelica Leicht aleicht@bcimedia.com

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Design/layout

Ryan Brown rbrown@bcimedia.com

Contributors

Megan Bianco

Amanda Push

Reader Services

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Chief Executive Officer

Carrie Cass V.P. of Advertising

Jamie Opalenik

4 The perfect pairing

Know what goes together just right? Well, let us tell you: it’s recreation and cannabis. And we aren’t talking about biking while stoned, either. Never, ever do that. Trust us. From a graffiti tour that lets you blaze and graze to sushi rolling while stoned, here’s what Colorado’s weed tourism industry has to offer you this summer.

7 Crimes against anatomy

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The head bone is connected to the neck bone, unless you’re a cadaver in Arizona — and in that case, things can get wild. Real, real wild. But we’ll stop there; we don’t want to ruin the surprise.

Tell us what you think!

Got something on your mind? Have a joke or a story idea or just something that the world needs to know? Send everything to editor@dgomag.com

12 Get weed-ucated

With the cannabis industry becoming more complex by the day, it’s important that those going into the field be fully knowledgeable of its full breadth. Thankfully, there are some institutions of higher learning that are getting in real deep on the business of bud. Like, so deep. So very deep.

4-6 Canna-tourism to check out this summer

7-9 Crimes against anatomy

10-11 Bud and breakfasts in Colorado

12-13 Go to weed school, nerd!

14-17 Cover story

18-19 Weed reviews

20 Rolling sushi and weed in Denver

21-25 Ask a couple of potheads

27 Dispensary listings

Let’s get weird(er than normal)

Cover

Getting ganja-y on cannabis-friendly tours

What goes together like peanut butter and jelly? Like white on rice? Like Doritos and Mountain Dew?

OK, we’re mostly kidding about the whole Doritos and Mountain Dew thing — we’ve never tried it, but as seasoned smokers, there is a good chance we will in the near future. And while we’re not super into the idea of Mountain Dew, we do love a little bit of junk food in our lives from time to time.

Anyway, back to what we were saying. What goes together like the pairings listed above?

Not sure? Well, let us tell you: it’s recreation and cannabis.

Now, we aren’t talking about hopping on a mountain bike while stoned. That doesn’t sound like a great idea. We’re talking about some more laidback activities. The kind you don’t really have to expend much energy (or break any bones) to do. You know… like stoned dinners and stuff. Those kinds of activities.

We aren’t just talking any old stoned dinners, though. We’re talking about the types of activities that someone else plans and executes for us. The ones where we just have to show up and have fun.

Those 420-friendly options exist in abundance across Colorado, and while they typically cater to out-of-towners or weed novices, there is absolutely no reason why we can’t all hop aboard the stoner activities train. It’s open to everybody, so choo-choo! Hop aboard!

You know you want to. After all, we could all use a break from our brains right now, and weed tends to provide that for us. And, now that summer tourist season has wound down in Colorado, it’s a great

time for us to become weed tourists in our own state.

But what are the best options to do that, you ask? Well, you know we have answers. If you’re looking for a way to pass the time while stoned, here are some of the best cannabis-friendly tour options and activities in Colorado.

The Blaze and Graze Graffiti Tour

Location: RiNo in Denver, CO

Price: $29

Walking distance: 2.5 miles

Do you love street art, food, and weed?

Hell yeah, us too — and, since that’s the case, this Blaze and Graze Graffiti tour is the right one for you (and us!). Con-

sidered one of Denver’s dopest walking tours, this 2.5-hour jaunt through the RiNo art district in Denver gives you a stoned crash course on the district’s bright graffiti murals outside in the open air. No stuffy bus for you!

This particular weed-filled adventure typically starts at a private lounge, where you’re given a rundown on the local dispensary deals and specialties to get you up to speed on what you should consume. From there, you take a little shopping trip to get your goods and then head back to the private lounge to indulge.

Once your head is in the clouds, you step out into the streets and alleyways of RiNo to find the art that’s hidden in plain sight. But you aren’t just gazing at the spray painted goods; you’re also learning the stories behind them from your tour

guides, which elevates this experience to levels you can’t find elsewhere.

Before you head out, though, you should know that this tour spans about 2.5 miles total, so you will need to be ready to get your steps in. (Yeah, we said it.) But don’t feel like you have to be in excellent shape to join in. This tour is mellow as heck, taking a snail’s (or stoner’s) pace as you walk past the 10 or so murals on the list.

In other words, you’re walking, but you’ll have plenty of time to take in the sights with your glazy stoner eyes and learn about one of the coolest districts in the state.

Cultivating Spirits’ 3-Course Cannabis Pairing Dinner

Location: Varies/Denver area

Price: $135 to $249 per person party size ranging from 4-24

Food and weed go together like, well, food and weed. We don’t know! All we know is that we love to stuff our faces with food — all food, from fancy fine dinners to cheap ol’ frozen pizza — when we’re blazed. And if you’re a cannabis connoisseur, so do you.

Well, you don’t have to do that from your couch anymore. You can join the rest of the world (or four or more of your closest stoner friends) with the Cultivating Spirits’ 3-Course Cannabis Pairing Dinner, the finest and stoniest dinner in the West.

The goal of this danky dinner party is to teach you the importance of becoming a cannabis connoisseur — all while enjoying the most excellent food and conversation as you blaze your bud. That’s right; no infusion here! You smoke your goods while eating.

» From a graffiti tour that lets you blaze and graze to sushi rolling while stoned, here’s what Colorado’s weed tourism industry has to offer you this summer

What makes this food tour especially awesome is that you aren’t just eating any food, though. You’re eating food prepared for you by amazing executive chefs, which is prepared to pair with the night’s greenery selections. And, you’ll get your own cannabis sommelier to do so.

Wait, wait. Don’t start booking your experience just yet, though. There’s more to tell you!

Not only will you be eating food and smoking weed that is hand-selected to pair well together, but you’ll be able to do so at your own abode or rental property. That’s right; the party literally comes to you. You’ll get your cannabis sommelier, your executive chef, and your serving staff all delivered to your casa. Good lord, you’re fancy.

During your dinner party, your crew will pair three different strains of cannabis with three different dishes, which are selected to harmonize and enhance one another.

And, this dinner party is great for newbies and veteran smokers alike, as it’s completely up to you how much you consume while the cannabis sommelier guides you through the tasting notes of the flower and the food — and just like a wine sommelier, elaborates on how the weed and food will enhance each other. They’ll even advise you on how to identify the type of high you’ll have before you smoke by teaching you how to recognize certain aspects of cannabis. It’s like a crash course in the very best things in life.

The cannabis dinner includes:

- A cannabis dejur inspired 3-course gourmet meal utilizing local, fresh and organic ingredients when possible

- A private executive chef

- A private cannabis sommelier

- A cannabis pairing educational demo on the importance of becoming a Cannabis Aficionado. = - Learn how to consciously consume Cannabis

- Culinary demonstration for each course

- The cannabis table setting

- A gift for everyone

- Setup and cleanup

- An exclusive dispensary experience (but due to state laws, Cultivating Spirits can not provide any cannabis. You will be responsible for picking up the cannabis

that they will pre-arrange for you).

Cannabis Massage Therapy

Location: Metro area of Denver, CO

Price for in-studio massage:

60 min: $115 Per Person

75 min: $145 Per Person

90 min: $165 Per Person

Price for in-room massage:

60 min: $130 Per Person

75 min: $160 Per Person

90 min: $190 Per Person

Free your body and your mind. No, seriously. You can free your body and your mind from all of the stress you’re carrying around by booking some cannabis massage therapy, which truly is a thing.

If you’re into massages and getting stoned, this is the combo you’ve been looking for. And, you can indulge in it at the massage studio or in the comfort of your own home or hotel room, so it’s even better than you expected.

Whatever location you choose, a trained massage therapist will help you unwind using a variety of all natural cannabis-infused lotions — which means you’ll get that good, good pain relief and relaxation from just the topical application alone. No ingesting necessary — so it’s great for you newer imbibers and cannabis-wary folks (though you may be sold on the beauty of cannabis after this one, so prepare yourself for stoner territory).

Buds & Beers: An Elevated Brewery Tour

Location: Denver, CO

Price: $89 per person

Who doesn’t love beer? Not I, said the cat. And who doesn’t love bud? Not us, said the DGO staff. We love both beer and weed, and when you combine the two? Well, friends. It’s absolute perfection.

And that’s precisely what Bud & Beers: An Elevated Brewery Tour does. It combines the best of both worlds: the hoppy beers of the Front Range with the skunky stench of our favorite flower.

If you’re a fan of Colorado brews — and who wouldn’t be, as this state is known for its craft beer — you can indulge to your heart’s content as the tour ferries you from one brewery to the

next while you’re ever-so-slightly blazed from your smoky ride aboard the luxury 420-friendly party bus that shuttles you.

And, there’s more. You aren’t just hopping aboard a bus to guide yourself. You’ll get an expert tour guide to give you the inside info on your route as you spark up from your seat in the back. Heck. Yessss.

The first stop on this tour is Spangalang, where you’ll take a quick tour and learn how this brewery’s delicious brews are, well, brewed.

From there, you’ll head to Whole Meds dispensary, which is a favorite with locals in the RiNo District of Downtown Denver. You may even snag a few deals while you’re there.

Next stop is The Green Solution, where you’ll get to view the grow operation and snap a few photos of your favorite plants — and maybe even snag a few more deals on some sweet, sweet cannabis, too.

And, the last stop on your tour is Epic Brewing, located in the historic Five Points district of Denver, where you’ll indulge in a few more beers. From there, you’re free to head back to the tour’s starting point or bar- and restaurant-hop in Five Points until you’ve reached your tipping point.

What you do post-tour is your business. What we’ll be doing, though, is napping off all of the food, brews, and weed and then counting the days until we can do it all again.

Puff, Pass, and Paint

Location: Denver, CO

Price: Varies

Want to channel your inner artiste? Yes, we meant artiste, not artist. We’re fancy here and you know it.

Anywho, if you want to channel your inner fancy French artiste, you need to indulge at Puff, Pass, and Paint. This class is — you guessed it — a stoner art class, but you don’t need to focus on your lack of art skillz. It ain’t even about that.

It’s about kicking back, relaxing, and freeing your mind with a paintbrush, a palette, and some freaking weed. Hell yeah.

That right there is a recipe for the perfect masterpiece, and when you add in the best artsy guide on the planet, you have complete and total magic.

And we really do mean the very best artsy guide. After all, owner and teacher Heidi Keyes knows her way around some art.

She is an established landscape painter whose work has an emphasis on vibrant color and texture — and she can help you channel your inner Picasso (or maybe not Picasso; you probably like your ears where they are) with ease...and with a little bit o’ cannabis.

Heidi earned her degree in studio art from Carthage College, and she is an internationally exhibited and collected artist. She’s known for being, well, spontaneous — and she knows just how to help you do the same with your masterpiece (and maybe your damn life; we don’t know).

Don’t let that intimidate you, though. You don’t need to be a trained painter — or even a regular cannabis user — to take this class. Painters and cannabis-users of all levels are welcome to join in on this class, which is held in an intimate setting so you won’t get overwhelmed.

You won’t even need to shell out for new paint brushes to attend. All of your materials are included in the cost. Plus, cannabis consumption is encouraged on site and a freaking rad time is guaranteed, so you really cannot ask for more.

Custom Sushi & Joint Rolling Class

Location: Denver, CO

Price: $550 per group of 3

Ooh, how about some sticky icky sushi and sativa? Or indica? Or a hybrid? Whatever you wanna smoke is cool with the folks at this sushi and joint rolling class, which teaches you how to roll the perfect sushi and the perfect joint in one class! Who knew!

Seriously. That’s what this class is: a crash course in expert rolling, and we’ve actually taken this class before and can highly recommend it. It was awesome (though we learned that we really freaking suck with a knife).

What’s great about this class is that it’s small and focused, but there is no judgment. The chef and stoner who guides you through the rolling course is well-trained and hilarious, and your classmates are almost certainly going to be just as awful at sushi rolling as you are,

so there is no pressure to be awesome.

All you need to take with you is your weed. And, you’ll get the hookup on that before you ever head out.

Prior to your class, you’ll be instructed on how to pick up two grams of cannabis from the partner dispensary that this class works with — and it’ll only cost you about $2.00 total, which is a heck of a deal.

Once you’ve got your goods, your class will be held at the location of your choosing (i.e. your own abode, rental, or whatever), where you will be guided through the process of rolling the perfect cone, which is a lot harder than you’d think. Trust us. We suck at it.

After nailing (and sparking up) your hand-rolled joint, you’ll tackle the task of rolling sushi. You’ll be handed a stack of sticky rice, your nori, and some sushi fillings — which includes vegetarian options — which you’ll take on with the help of your excellent chef-slash-guide, who actually knows how the heck to roll a sushi roll.

And, since you’ll almost certainly have the dang munchies after all of that work (and all of that weed!), you’ll get to shovel that delicious, albeit wonky, sushi down your gullet if you so choose. We certainly did, and it was worth every finger we lifted.

These are skills that can come in handy well after your class is over, so this class is truly a great way to nail down a fun night of stoner antics and joint- and sushi-rolling skills. We can’t recommend it more.

The Original Colorado Cannabis Tour

Location: Denver, CO

Price: Starts at $49

Ready to party with the OG of cannabis tours? Well, that’s the Original Cannabis Tour, which is the original gangster of these stoner-tour shenanigans.

There’s a reason tourists (and locals) love this option. You’ll get to hang out in a smoky tour bus with an entertaining guide while you make pit stops at all of the awesome weed-related hotspots in Denver.

Not sure what that means? Well, it includes a state of the art double-decker

grow facility, a couple of dispensaries, and the badass glass art studio known as Illuzion Glass Gallery.

That’s right; there’s glassblowing! And you’ll get to see it live! Lucky ass you.

Whatever you do, though, just don’t try to convince your glassblowing experts that you can outdo them at their own craft. It may be tempting to try and jump in on the fun, but it isn’t even close to as easy as it looks. Trust us. We know.

City Sessions Tour

Location: Denver, CO

Price (half-day):

$500 for one half-day

$650 for two half-day

$800 for three half-days + $150 per additional after the 3rd

Price (full day):

$1000 for one full day

$1200 for two full days + $200 per additional after the 2nd

Looking to get into the canna-business? Or are you interested in investing in cannabis? Well, friends, do we have the best, most awesome, and most unique tour for you.

Say hello to the Cannabis Industry Insider Tour, which is a crash course in the Colorado cannabis industry from the insiders who run it.

You’ll learn everything about Colorado’s weed industry, from how it started to where it’s at today — all courtesy of the experts.

On this tour, you’ll get to visit some of the highest quality cultivation facilities, extraction labs, and dispensaries in the state. You’ll learn about the business models and find out why they have achieved a longstanding place in the Colorado market — which is no easy feat, given the competition.

Oh, and there’s more. You won’t just hear about the business components of cannabis. You’ll also learn everything you need to know about the changing regulations in the industry, which is increasingly important given our state’s evolving cannabis laws.

And, you’ll also hear about what’s been proven to be successful and unsuccessful business models, how the best branding works, and more.

In other words, this tour is ideal for cannabis investors and soon-to-be cannabis insiders alike.

Want to learn about cultivation? Well, you can!

If you opt for the multi-day tour, you’ll be taken to the cultivation facilities and given a crash course in that part of the industry. But, you will have to make a time commitment to the cause, because you can’t tour multiple grows in one day. You’ll have to spread it out over a few days to prevent cross-contamination or pollination, which is extremely important to growers.

But you’ll learn all about that — and everything else related to cannabis — on this tour.

Itinerary:

- Pick up from Denver-based lodging location* OR from the City Sessions’ Office

- Cannabis business overview in the City Sessions’ Lounge

- Walkthrough a commercial grow facility to see and learn the process of cultivating cannabis from clone to cure (or its full lifecycle)

- Walkthrough a butane extraction facility to see and learn the process of making butane extracted concentrates (wax, budder, live resin)

- Stop at a dispensary to review the business model and product line

- Second dispensary stop to review the business model (if time permits)

- Return to lodging location

Second day itinerary (or extended day):

- Walkthrough a different commercial cultivation facility

- Dispensary stops to review business models and product lines

- Walkthrough a state-of-the-art edible production facility

Loopr’s Movie Nights

Location: Denver, CO

Price: $35

What’s one of the favorite stoner community pastimes? You guessed it — getting blazed and watching a bunch of hilarious (and sometimes hilariously bad) movies.

That’s precisely what you can do on

Loopr’s Movie Nights: get stoned and watch movies. This is a great way to relax while smoking a few blunts with your buddies — and it’s an especially intriguing option for out-of-towners, who aren’t able to legally consume in public or most hotels in the state.

And that’s where this Loopr Movie Night has you covered.

First conceived as a way to address the “where to smoke” question that many tourists have, this movie night is offered on a hop-on-hop-off party bus that visits dispensaries and other 420-friendly businesses along the way.

And it does so as you laugh your literal ass off watching films like “Harold and Kumar Go to White Castle” and “The Big Lebowski” — which sounds like an epic night to us.

Half-Baked Tour by Fly Fishing the Rocky Mountains

Location: Varies

Price: Starting at $400 per person

Want to fly fish while blazed in nature? Normally we’d tell you to get your healthy nature-loving rear end out of our lazy stoner way, but not today, friends! Not today.

You can do exactly that with Fly Fishing the Rocky Mountains, a tour company that doesn’t do cookie cutter things. While the main theme of this tour company is fishing, it offers the “Half Baked Tour” for weed lovers, led by the colorful Bob “Doc” Young.

On this four-hour tour (not a threehour tour; there is no Gilligan to strand you here!), Doc will take you from Estes Park to the amazing mountains and picturesque streams and lakes to fly fish while stoned.

But don’t worry; you don’t need to be a seasoned fly fisherman to join in. On the private tour, you’ll learn to fly fish while indulging in some of Colorado’s best cannabis. It really is the trip of a lifetime, whether you’re a Colorado native or a tourist looking to get a little wild.

DGO Staff

Crimes against anatomy

» The head bone is connected to the neck bone (unless you’re a cadaver in Arizona)

“Death. It doesn’t have to be boring,” Mary Roach wrote in her book, “Stiff: The Curious Lives of Human Cadavers.” The New York Times bestselling author wasn’t off in her assessment. These days, you don’t have to just be buried or cremated. You can go the tree burial route, be shot into space via rocket, freeze your body until modern medicine can revive you, be turned into fertilizer, or have your ashes crafted into a diamond.

Far less romantic, you can donate your body to be used for

scientific or medical research. You might not become one with mother nature or shoot through space like a lifeless Superman but your body can assist in making some pretty incredible medical or scientific progress. Not just known for palm trees and being the birthplace of Stevie Nicks, Arizona, in particular, has become a thriving market in the body-selling industry.

“At least four body donation companies are operating in Arizona, in addition to a non-profit cryonics company that freezes

people after they die with the intent of one day bringing them back to life.”

“Approximately 4,000 people — about 7 percent of the people who die in Arizona each year — are whole body donors, which is roughly five times the national average based on 39 reporting states, the Illinois-based Cremation Association of North America says.

The American Association of Tissue Banks has accredited seven non-transplant human tissue banks in the United States, and

four of them, including Research for Life, are headquartered in Arizona.

In addition to the body donation businesses, the state has two medical school programs that accept donated bodies. A research group operated by Banner Health in Sun City has a 32-year-old program that accepts brain and whole bodydonations as part of its scientific work looking at diseases of aging.

In Scottsdale, a nonprofit called Alcor Life Extension Foundation

has been operating its cryonics facility since 1994.”

“Arizona has probably one of the largest donor bases for human tissue for medical education and research than probably any other place in the country,”

ing nonetheless.

Yet, when it comes to modern cadaverselling practices, there are still grisly stories to this day.

Garland Shreves,

CEO of Research for Life in Phoenix, told Arizona Central in June 2019.

The dark side of donations

As noble as body donations are in the name of science they are not without their scandals. In fact, there’s a long history of grave robbing and murder associated with the practice. Though, these were not willing donations. The problem got so bad that wealthier families would build iron coffins or safes over the graves of loved ones. Eventually, legislation made it easier for medical students and professionals to have access to bodies to practice on, but the stories are still chill-

In 2014, Biological Resource Center, a for-profit body donation company in Phoenix, was raided by the FBI as part of a federal investigation involving the organization’s clients, Arthur Rathburn, a Detroit body broker. The company accepted body donations of bodies and provided the families of the deceased free transportation services to pick up the body as well as a free cremation.

During the raid of BRC, according to a civil lawsuit against BRC, agents made gruesome discoveries including a small head sewn onto a large body in a “‘Frankenstein’ manner,” a cooler filled with male genitalia, and buckets of limbs.

Unsettling images from the raid show agents in hazmats suits encasing their flesh as they dragged out large red garbage bags, their contents left to the imagination.

According to a 2017 article by Reuters,

10 tons of frozen human remains were found by investigators. In total, there were 1,755 total body parts including 281 heads, 241 shoulders, 337 legs, and 97 spines. Of the 142 body bags hauled away during the raid, one contained body parts from 36 different people.

According to Arizona Central, the state of Arizona runs fast and loose as far as regulation goes for the cadaver-selling industry. In 2017, in response to the BRC raid, the state passed legislation stating that body donation companies were no longer allowed to run without a state license. Alas, it is not a law that has been enforced.

As unsettling as it is to read graphic descriptions the betrayal was visceral to the family members who believed their loved ones’ bodies were going toward a worthy cause.

Troy Harp is one of more than 30 plaintiffs suing BRC. He donated the bodies of his mother and grandmother, believing their remains would serve a scientific purpose for the greater good. Instead, he was shocked to find that they were, most

likely, mere body parts strewn about like rubbish.

“This is a horror story. It’s just unbelievable. This story is unbelievable,” he said, according to KKTV 11. “Cancer, and leukemia and whatever else, using sample cells, that’s what I was told.”

“I was devastated,” Gwendolyn Aloia, another plaintiff who donated her husband’s body to BRC, told TIME. “I’ve been violated. He’s been violated.”

Lawyers for the plaintiffs did some digging into Gore’s past and found that his highest level of education was high school, according to Arizona Central, and that he had no licenses or certifications related to body donation industry.

Even more telling, after going through donor files from May 3, 2011 through January 20, 2014, Reuters found that most of those supplying cadavers to BRC were impoverished. Many of these donors came from neighborhoods where the median household income fell below the state average and four out of five donors didn’t graduate from college.

The raid occurred in 2014 but the case gained a new wave of outrage after details in a lawsuit against BRC were released. The civil lawsuit is expected to go to trial Oct. 21.

Court documents even go as far as providing chilling details like a 2013 price list for body parts:

Whole body with no shoulders or head: $2,900

Torso with head: $2,400

Whole spine: $950

Whole leg: $1,100

Whole foot: $450

Knee: $375

Pelvis: $400

In a letter to the judge, Stephen Gore, the owner of BRC, complained that he was working in an industry that lacked formal regulation, according to Arizona Central.

“I could have been more open about the process of donation on the brochure we put in public view,” he wrote. “When deciding which donors could be eligible

to donate, I should have hired a medical director rather than relying on medical knowledge from books or the internet.”

The bright side of death

Not all is dark and demented when it comes to the for-profit cadaver industry, however.

At Research for Life, another Phoenix body donation company, consent is king.

“I think that the mystique surrounding it is part of the problem, because people don’t understand what it is that we do or why we do it,” Shreves told Arizona Central. “There isn’t anything that we do that isn’t under consent.”

In fact, the company goes as far to offer tours of its facility to offer more transparency into the industry and that they’re not “back-alley grave robbers,” Shreves said.

A representative for Southwest Institute for Bio-Advancement, a for-profit body donation business in Tucson, also emphasized their business’s consent practice.

“Our consent is extremely clear. It quite extensively says tissue will be removed. You are 100 percent aware of what you agreeing to in our consent,” said Allison Howell, medical client and community relations manager.

Donating your body to be disassembled and sent to various places to be used isn’t exactly the most dignified way to dispose of your flesh, but it’s very likely the donation will help further medical and scientific research. In fact, during one tour of Research for Life, Shreves pointed out a group of surgeons working on a donated shoulder.

“We owe donors for a variety of therapies that have been invented that add quality of life to people who are living with very serious diseases,” he told the tour. “They have longer life expectancy because of donors.”

A sticky business

Death is a sticky and profitable business, it seems. As with any industry, there’s good with the bad. But perhaps with the for-profit body donation in-

dustry it’s time for more oversight and transparency.

“Allowing the donor to be used in parts makes certain that the donor can benefit a variety of medical education and research projects. ... We fill a need that I think is personally more important than university programs because of the nature of what we do with donors and the way donors are used,” Shreves said.

As for the money-making aspect of it all?

“You can’t do what we do without generating revenue,” Shreves said. “(The vendors) have to pay us, and there is nothing disgusting or wrong about it. There are people in our society who find it distressing that we get paid to recover human tissue. There’s no law against the buying or selling of human tissue. I do find it distasteful to call it that, but it’s semantics.”

Wake and bake in these CO bud and breakfasts

» Because who doesn’t love getting stoned on vacation? We all do!

One of the best parts of taking a trip somewhere is the chance to relax and get away from the hustle and bustle of routine. As good citizens of the green state of Colorado, I think, or at least HOPE, we can all agree that one of the best ways to relax is by smoking doobies. That’s right, we’re taking a hard stance.

However, one of the bummers of staying somewhere other than your humble abode is that a lot of businesses don’t

want you toking up in their establishments. Well friends, fear no more. The following are a few 420 friendly places to stay in southern and western Colorado should you find yourself needing respite from not only being on the road, but not being stoned.

Please, please, please remember to always ask about the property owner’s policy on smoking and vaping before lighting up.

Wilderness Bud and Breakfast

Location: Pagosa Springs, CO

If you’re a stoner on the road but you’re more about that camping out life than staying at a hotel, it’s time to find your way to Wilderness Bud and Breakfast. With some breathtaking mountain

views, Wilderness Bud and Breakfast offers teepee and tent sites along the banks of the Rio Blanco. During your stay, you can enjoy amenities such as a continental breakfast, a 420 happy hour, and a campfire area you share with fellow campers. Cannabis use is permitted in the teepees and throughout the campground. The camping season for Wilderness Bud and Breakfast starts in mid-May and goes through September.

Ouray Main Street Inn

Location: Ouray, CO

If you’ve never ventured to the mountain haven that is Ouray, stop what you’re doing and immediately start driving there. Not only is this beautiful mountain town full of breweries, shops, and outdoor activities, but it has a 420 friendly inn! There are eight rooms, each with mountain views you’re looking for here in Colorado, and the inn is just one block from downtown Ouray. Find yourself in the Outlaw Room, Miner’s Cabin, Box Canyon Suite, or one of the other

many rooms. Our only complaint is that the Mustang Room does not come with a mustang, neither in the horse or sports car variety. Pot smoking is allowed inside with a Smoke Buddy or a different air filter approved by inn staff. You can either bring your own Smoke Buddy, or you can purchase/borrow one from the inn.

Amazon Acres on the River

Location: Durango, CO

This two-bedroom cottage exists on a 10-acre farm outside of Durango. Not

only do the owners grow cannabis, but they raise friggin’ kunekune pigs (if you don’t know what those are, please Google immediately.). The property is also equipped with a private backyard and access to a five-acre riverfront park. The owners of this bud and breakfast ask that you please only smoke or vape outside the house and to not feed their animals, no matter how cute they may be.

Celestial Rose Bed + Breakfast

Location: Grand Junction

Celestial Rose in Grand Junction is all about making sure your 420 friendly accomodations are top-notch and isn’t afraid to let you know. We gotta say - this might be one of the prettiest houses we’ve laid eyes on, 420 friendly or otherwise. This gorgeous historic property is a far cry from what comes to mind when you think of 420 friendly accommodations. Classy and dreamy, the property is a mere 10-20 minute drive to a few local dispensaries. Guests can choose between two rooms, the Luna or the Apollo room. Not to worry though, both are equipped with breathtaking views.

DGO Staff

Get educated about ganja with these weedy higher education options

» Who needs physics when you can study the science of weed instead?

With the cannabis industry expanding and becoming more complex by the day, it’s important that those going into the field be fully knowledgeable of its full breadth. After all, it is the fastest growing industry in the U.S., according to Markets Insider.

Thankfully, there are some institutions of higher learning that are getting in real deep on the business of bud. Like, so deep. So very deep.

And, given that so many of us are rethinking how we work, live, and play, this could be a great time to carve out a new career path in good old cannabis. Here are two options for expanding your mind and learning more about cannabis.

Conquer the field of cannabis control with a graduate certificate program from Excelsior

College

Excelsior College, a regionally accredited, not-for-profit online college, offers a virtual graduate certificate program in cannabis control—which you can enroll in to further your career or just learn a heck of a lot more about cannabis. (Or maybe even become a weed professor. Is that a thing? If so, we want in.)

What is a cannabis control program, you ask? Glad you asked! This threecourse, nine-credit certificate offers an educational opportunity to people currently working or looking to work in the cannabis industry.

Excelsior’s certificate program educates students on the “opportunities, challenges, and complexities of the cannabis industry and its accompanying regulations.” Students will learn the impact of cannabis legalization on a local, state, and national level.

Instructors hope to prepare students to eventually dialogue and work with policymakers, industry leaders, proprietors, etc as far as the cannabis market is considered.

Before jumping in, here are a few things you should know about the program:

The program is 100% online.

The three courses include:

— Implications of Legalization of Cannabis: Policy and Compliance

— Interstate/International Commerce: Policy and Regulatory Environment

— Risk Assessment in Cannabis Control

Admission to Excelsior’s cannabis control certificate program requires students to have a bachelor’s degree.

This graduate-level certificate program takes an interdisciplinary approach and can be taken alone for college credit and career advancement or applied toward four of Excelsior College’s master’s degree programs.

“The more we talk to experts and leaders in the industry, the more we are hearing about the need for education and training in this dynamic and rapidlyevolving regulatory space. Despite projections of continued growth, regionally-accredited universities and colleges have been relatively slow to respond with educational offerings,” Scott Dolan, dean of graduate studies at Excelsior College, told Benzinga. “For us, this program is naturally aligned with our disciplinary expertise in business, public health, criminal justice, and public administration.”

Get yo’ weed degree on with the Cannabis Training University

For those of you still teetering on the fence of what you’d like to do with your life, if going back to school is an option for you, well, now there’s weed university. Well...to be more exact there’s Cannabis Training University.

According to Westword, the school’s training is now offered at two and four-year universities across the United States. The expansion of the program is due to the quickly growing cannabis industry.

“We saw there was going to be a need in education in colleges where the cannabis-industry education can also be included,” CTU CEO Jeff Zorn said to Westword. “Students sign up because

they usually want to be involved in the industry after college, whether it’s to be an assistant grower or start their own business in areas like CBD or edibles.”

If you do find yourself signing up for CTU classes, you can take six classes all geared toward the green (that’s cannabis for those of you who didn’t get it). You’ll learn about the industry from a holistic standpoint, from opening a dispensary to growing your own plants. Once you pass, you will be officially certified in various parts of the industry.

Zorn started CTU ten years ago after he suffered a traumatic brain injury. He began using medical marijuana to help him cope and decided he wanted to be part of the education aspect of the cannabis industry. CTU has enrolled 30,000 students, Zorn told Westword.

“We have a lot of people interested, whether it’s students wanting to be in the industry, people interested for their own personal reasons, or health-care professionals looking for further knowledge,” Zorn said. “Our job is to just put everything together for students and have colleges offer it for them.”

Amanda Push

Uncovering the Aztec UFO incident

Was what happened in 1948 flying saucer incident a cover-up? A hoax? Or something else entirely?

Push

The site of the 1948 UFO crash just north of Aztec, New Mexico is not an easy place to find. It’s hidden inside a desert, barren landscape with nothing but rugged dirt roads, eerie rock formations, and arid shrub life along County Road 2770.

The Aztec UFO incident is a story we’d never even heard tale of until the last couple of months. In March 1948, a 100-foot saucer is believed to have crashed just north of Aztec. Unlike the Roswell crash, which took place only eight months previously, the Aztec UFO is believed to have landed mostly intact with its occupants killed by the impact. The government is believed to have descended upon the isolated site and swept its contents up into a black hole of red-taped secrecy.

It takes us two trips to Aztec to search for the crash site and even then we are unsuccessful. During our first drive, we arrogantly don’t think to look up the directions ahead of time and get so confused that, in fear of popping a tire or getting stuck, we return

home, defeated.

Our second trip we plan more carefully, printing out a map and paying more attention to the roads we pass. We are at least successful in finding the parking area and take a scraggy mountain bike trail through the shrubbery. The rocky trail is hard to pinpoint at some instances during our walk toward what we hope is the direction of the crash site. We keep an eye out for a plaque commemorating the site; alas, we are unsuccessful and the sun is quickly disappearing behind the mesa. We head back to the car, disappointed.

We agree while driving down the windy, dirt roads and passing a rock structure that could pass as a sphinx in the quickly oncoming darkness, that of all the places we’ve traveled in the Four Corners region, if we were going to encounter a UFO, it’d be here.

A meeting of the minds

The 1948 Aztec UFO crash incident is a controversial topic amongst those who discuss the extra-terrestrial. There are all kinds of theories and talk of coverups and hoaxes.

However, perhaps none are more qualified to talk about this specific incident than Scott and Suzanne Ramsey and Frank Thayer - co-researchers and authors of their book, “The Aztec UFO Incident.”

The Ramseys, who now live in North Carolina, have spent more than 30 years and $500,000 researching this event and it’s hard to imagine finding anyone more dedicated to the Aztec UFO crash. In fact, Scott and Suzanne even met through their interest in the event.

Suzanne was a child living in South Dakota when she first heard of Aztec ten years after Variety magazine columnist Frank Scully published his 1950 book, “Behind the Flying Saucers,” on the crash.

“My parents moved to Aztec, New Mexico. ... My mom actually wanted to move there because of the incident and was grossly disappointed when she got there that nobody talked about it.”

Eventually, Scott guested on her local news talk radio show, For Your Information. The rest, as they say, is history.

The trio was drawn to the Aztec story because of the level of documented proof in favor of the incident occurring.

“I guess I was intrigued because I thought, ‘How did something spectacular happen, and all the spotlight was put on Roswell, and this is much more documented,’” Scott said.

“I’ll speak for all of us, but none of us picked it. We did not pick it. It picked us,’ Suzanne said. “It isn’t like we sought out to prove it. Like I said, we’re doing it because it’s something we want to document or prove one way or the other. It’s almost addictive. You talk about 30 years of research and none of us picked it. There’s a hook there.”

Decades of research

The Ramseys and Thayer, who is a

professor emeritus at New Mexico State University, will sometimes spend years dissecting sources to ensure their credibility. They’re painstakingly scientific in their approach and are not amused by those who look to sensationalize the Aztec story. Indeed, it even takes us a phone call and a couple emails back and forth to convince them we were not interested in turning their research into a tabloid cover.

“When we get a lead, it sometimes takes us two years to document that one lead. That’s why it takes so long,” Suzanne said. “For one thing, life goes on, you have to work around that. But also, you can’t just take someone’s word for it. There’s all types of documentation. … This is not a passing thing and certainly, we do not just pull it up on the internet because, you

know as well as we do, that anybody can put anything on the internet and they can falsify it and they don’t even have to use their real names. So that’s never something that we do. It’s always archival.”

For example, they were trying to identify the group of scientists where Scully got his information from. Scully, who never revealed their identitied, refers to them collectively as Dr. G.

The Ramseys and Thayer spent two or three years researching who these scientists could have been based on Scully’s descriptions.

Eventually, they ended up at the University of Minnesota in their archives and, with the help of the university’s archivist, unsealed boxes on a doctor. The boxes had been sealed when the doctor died in 1950 and had never

been opened.

“And in there was an amazing collection of stories about how he had been in the southwest of the United States in March of 1948 and he hated flying and he drove their station wagon out there because something horrific happened that he needed to get there,” Scott said. “And that’s the kind of thing we do.”

The research team is currently chasing down a lead from a man who claims that while at Wright-Patterson Air Force Base in Dayton, Ohio, he was privy to information on the Aztec crash in the 50s, early 60s.

“And to verify his story, we go and pull the tax records. We pull the school records,” Scott said. “Anybody can tell you anything. But when you have a copy that they paid the real estate tax in the dates that he claimed he was living there, well, that’s kind of moves you on to the next step. So we do a very, very exhausting background check on everybody that tells a story.”

A hoax or a cover-up?

The journey of the Aztec UFO crash incident has not been an easy one.

In 1949, the account was published by Scully in his Variety columns. A year later, he published the book “Behind the Flying Saucers.” However, after the book was published, two of the story’s witnesses, Silas Newton and Leo Gebauer, were accused of concocting their accounts so they could sell fake alien technology in a money-making scheme. The public’s faith in the story fell apart after that.

The Ramseys and Thayer, however,

‘How did something spectacular happen, and all the spotlight was put on Roswell, and this is much more documented,’”

through their research, believe that it may have gone down a different way.

“Gotta remember that from 1952 until about 1986, no one would touch the Aztec incident,” Thayer said. “It was poisoned. No UFO researchers would touch it because it was considered to be a hoax hoisted off on the public by conmen. This was taken apart in our book. We realized the government engineered that story to sink Aztec and they were willing to ruin the lives of two, three people, to make sure it got covered up. … You cannot refute the evidence that we have put in this book.”

Documentation from government sources such as the March 22, 1950, Hottel memo, which is the most viewed

document in the FBI Vault, have also bolstered belief in UFO stories.

The memo, written by Guy Hottel, the head of the FBI field office in Washington, D.C., reads as follows:

“An investigator for the Air Force stated that three so-called flying saucers had been recovered in New Mexico. They were described as being circular in shape with raised centers, approximately 50-feet in diameter. Each one was occupied by three bodies of human shape but were 3 feet tall, dressed in metallic cloth of very fine texture. Each body was bandaged in a manner similar to the blackout suite of speed flyers and test pilots.

According to Mr. --------- informant, the saucers were found in New Mexico due to the fact that the Government has a very high-powered radar set-up in that area and it is believed the radar interferes with the controlling mechanics of the saucers.

No further evaluation was attempted by SA --------- concerning the above.”

The memo was addressed to FBI Director J. Edgar Hoover and indexed in FBI records. While many people originally believed the memo was referring to Roswell, some believe the document was actually in reference to Aztec.

“That is one of many, many, many interesting documents. The only critique

it’s had over the years - it doesn’t mention Aztec,” Scott said. “And we have many documents that specifically mention Aztec.”

One such government documentation they’ve found is of a sting operation that occurred in downtown Denver between the FBI and the Army Counterintelligence Division. The agencies set up the sting to buy photos from a man peddling photos to an alleged reporter for $2,500.

“Just as the buy was about to go down, the FBI and Army CID - that’s Counter Intelligence Division - stepped in. And they specifically in that FBI report say the gentlemen was trying to sell pictures of the Aztec flying saucer.”

“The bottom line on that one is the government took the Aztec saucer very seriously,” Thayer said. “If there was no Aztec saucer they would not be been willing to pony up a bunch of money to buy some photos whether they existed or not.”

Handle the truth

Throughout our talk with the Aztec crash researchers, there’s much discussion of government secrecy and coverups. A question comes to mind.

“Why do you think the government

goes so far and works so hard to keep these incidents as secretive as possible? Do they think that’s helpful in the long run? Do you think that people can even handle the idea that there is other life out there?”

Considering the tense climate at the time, making extraterrestrials a secret at the beginning of the Cold War was important, Thayer said. “And they just never let up.”

“I honestly think in 1948, this is right after World War II. We’re only three years after World War II. The Cold War

was going on,” Scott said. “I think our government was absolutely smart in not letting our enemies know that we had recovered one, two, three, maybe four flying saucers. Why would we let the Russians know that that kind of technology was there? We were better off to make it look like a hoax, ridicule the people that saw it. You know, we had to make them the town drunk. We do that and move on. Take the technology and try to figure it out because if we’ve got it, God bless, it’s a lot better than if they have it.”

Suzanne believes that because the government has had to cover up stories like Aztec for so long, it would be a mess once they admitted what was really going on.

“Now this is my personal opinion, if they were to come out now and say, ‘Yep, we lied all along,’ well that would kind of give an opportunity for people to say, ‘Well if you lied about that what else are you learning about?’”

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Seems like we’re on an indica kick these days, you guys. But to be honest, if all indicas are like San Fernando Valley OG, aka SFV OG, from our friends over at Prohibition Her, which the subject of today’s strain review, you can just keep ‘em coming.

Known as SFV OG, San Fernando Valley OG is an interesting strain. It’s a member of the OG Kush family, and hails from –you guessed it – San Fernando Valley in California. The smell of this strain isn’t super heavy – it’s a bit like smelling damp, sour, lemon-y earth – and neither are the effects. Twas a good ride indeed. Here’s what happened.

As is par for the course these days, I grabbed the SFV OG on a Monday night and lit up a small-ish bowl. And by small I mean very large. (Don’t judge me. It’s already been a long month.) The buds are small, dense, and super green, with tiny red hairs throughout. Given its overall unassuming nature, I was surprised at how bitter the smoke from the tiny buds was. I suppose I just wasn’t expecting such a harsh hit after the relatively pleasant smell of the strain, but there it was. A mouth full of bitterness.

Worry not, though, friends. The taste of SFV OG wasn’t overwhelming or super unpleasant. It’s just noticeable pretty quickly in, especially when you’re comparing it to some of the other strains we’ve reviewed recently.

The effects, though, are anything but bitter. Unlike some of the other indicas and indica-heavy hybrid strains, San Fernando Valley OG doesn’t leave you with a heavy couch-lock feeling. Even if you smoke a massive bowl. Or two massive bowls. Or… you get the idea.

My arms worked, my legs worked, and even my brain worked (well, it worked about as well as it does these days). It wasn’t super easy to creep on social

media – my attention span is regularly that of a gnat, but it is especially after this strain – but I didn’t feel super out of it or useless. In fact, in a weird way, I felt awake. I’d started out this review process while super dragging ass – again, it’s been a long month – but by the time the bowl was cashed, I was high, but in a very calm, aware manner. I had half-expected to be sleepy and done with life after that bowl, but I wasn’t. I was just… well… chill.

The high from SFV OG stayed chill the entire time, too. It vacillated from a head high to a body high, rocking back and forth in calm waves, but at no point did it feel harsh or overwhelming. Things were good. Life was good. This month… still sucked, but not as much.

This strain would be perfect for a daytime indica buzz, especially on a stressful or overwhelming day. You won’t be hyper-alert and focused a’la some sativas, but you won’t be glued to your seat, either.

I’m pretty sure this would be a solid strain to help with the ol’ anxiety issues. I ended up feeling like I was a cloud – shit wasn’t heavy, and I didn’t have a care in the world. Well, other than the fact that I’d exhausted my cookie stash. That was a worry when the munchies kicked in, but if you make sure your snack supply is replenished before you light up, you should be right solid.

DGO Pufnstuf

SFV OG is the real original gangster of chill

» Just make sure your snack supply is replenished before you light up, OK?

Weed stole our soul

I’m pretty sure I coughed out part of my soul last week. How did I do that, you ask? Well, let me tell you. It was Glueball’s fault. All freaking Glueball.

Not sure what Glueball is? Neither was I prior to smoking it. I picked this strain up from The Green House in Durango for review, and while I surmised that this strain was at least somewhat related to good old Gorilla Glue (or whatever it’s been renamed to post-lawsuit), I didn’t know exactly how.

Turns out I was correct, though it took me a while to confirm. This strain, an indica hybrid, is the product of Original Glue and Snowball, hence the name Glueball. I didn’t know what the hell Original Glue was until I googled it, though. Turns out that THAT is one of Gorilla Glue’s new monikers. (Damn the man! I’m using that name anyway!) It just took me some time to figure that out.

Once I’d confirmed that this strain had lineage in GG4, or Gorilla Glue, or Original Glue, I was pretty darn stoked to try it. I love that strain, and I knew there was a chance I’d love any strain that came from it.

What I wasn’t so sure about, however,

was Snowball. I don’t think I’ve reviewed that strain — at least not any time in the recent past — and didn’t know anything about it.

That said, weed is weed, and I had a job to do. Yolo or something.

Despite not knowing anything about Snowball, I knew that this was a solid strain from the moment I popped the lid off of the gram of Glueball I picked up from the dispensary. There were just two nugs in the container, but when I dumped them out, I was impressed with their size. They were massive fluffballs of light green flower, and believe me when I tell you they reeked. Bad.

Not in a bad way, though. When I say they reeked, what I mean is that these two little nugs had some serious pungency to them. They smelled like gasoline, pine, and oranges, a strange combination, but it worked.

Those fluffy nugs tasted just like they smelled, too. The initial hit off the dry herb vape I was using tasted bright and green, with just a hint of diesel behind it. It was completely pleasant to taste.

What wasn’t so pleasant, however, was the choking that came along with it. Oh.

» Glueball was a heck of a strain, friends

Sushi, the Mile High City, and a lot of weed

» Rolling with the sushi at Denver’s

Back in 2019, some of the DGO Mag staff hit the road for a short trip to Denver, where we had loaded our weekend with all things cannabisrelated. We’d been looking for a hot minute to find a business that offered cannabisrelated activities that were interesting enough to write on, and had stumbled upon the Kush & Canvases website one quiet Tuesday afternoon. And that, friends, is how we ended up on the front steps of Sarah Woodson’s Denver home.

Kush & Canvases is a small business started by Woodson, where clients can take classes in which they may paint and ingest marijuana or take sushi and joint rolling classes (it’s a bring-your-own-weed policy). We were there for the sushi. We could tell right off the bat this night was gonna get interesting. We had smoked just before we’d arrived (don’t worry, we took a Lyft) and couldn’t stop laughing long enough to show everyone that we were indeed very serious journalists.

We had also never rolled sushi before, and the idea of learning in front of another group of people was daunting. Luckily, it was just us and a couple who were visiting from Colorado Springs while another group sat in the back painting and laughing so much we were a little jealous we couldn’t join them. Nice, intimate, and not intimidating whatsoever.

Woodson’s story of how she came to be the entrepreneur of her own cannabis cooking and art classes is unique. Not long ago, Woodson was a paralegal who had built up her legal career for a decade before it lost its allure, according to a profile Ebony published on her.

“What I could think of, what I could do to get out of the legal career?” Woodson told Ebony. “If I smoked weed, what is something I would love to do? Weed and paint!”

Ebony reported that Woodson is probably one of very few African Americans working in Colorado’s social cannabis consumption industry. She told Ebony she hopes to rally more Black people and people of color to work in the cannabis field.

That, friends, is how this scenario came to be. We were making three rolls that evening – tuna, mushroom, and imitation crab – with chef Harold Sims, who we later learned has the superpower of infinite levels of patience.

After what I thought was carefully cutting the tuna meat and rolls as Sims had demonstrated, it was apparent that my inability to follow directions had followed me into this sushi class. Our entire table spent the evening cry-laughing at my sorry attempts to make sushi, which was not fit for even a dog to eat. At one point, the way I cut my sushi roll caused it to completely fall apart, and the chef took my knife away and sliced it himself so I had at least one decent roll to show off to the world on my Instagram feed.

My attempt to follow his instructions on how to roll a joint did not go well either. Eventually, I gave up and handed over my roll to Sims so that he could fix it into something smokable.

If you’re looking for a night of a helluva lot of fun, weed consumption, and laughter, and you’re intimidated by the idea of being around a big group of people you don’t know, Kush & Canvases might be the class for you. There’s nothing intimidating about stepping into Woodson’s home. The instantaneous warm welcome will easily fool you into forgetting you’re not rolling sushi and joints in your own home. At Kush & Canvases, you’re among friends, even with strangers.

DGO Staff

Kush & Canvases is some of the most fun we’ve ever had

Ask a couple of potheads

Why does cottonmouth happen and what the heck should you listen to when stoned? Don’t worry. We have the answers.

Hello out there! This is Blaze and Puf, your two friendly neighborhood potheads. We’re here to be your safe place for answers on all things pot. While we don’t necessarily love getting texts at 2 a.m. asking if it’s possible to overdose on weed (ahem, mom, ahem), we do like being the idiots who answer your deepest, darkest questions on things like, “How much THC is too much THC?” or “What is this that I’m vaping?” So, in order to get you guys to stop texting us photos of some blurry lump of bright yellow wax at ungodly hours, we’re offering up this Q&A instead. You can ask us ANYTHING YOU WANT TO in here. There are no rules. You can even email us at 4 a.m. on a Tuesday if you want to. The world is your freaking pothead oyster!

So come one, come all with your silly, embarrassing, or just plain weird questions about weed, weed-related issues, and whatever else you can dream up. We’ll do our best to answer them in the best way possible. And here we go.

Every time I get stoned, I get what people refer to as cottonmouth. Why does this happen and what can I do to stop the madness??

Blaze: For those who aren’t aware or who haven’t experienced this annoying side effect of getting stoned, it’s exactly how it sounds. The inside of your mouth feels like you’ve just shoved a dozen cotton balls inside of it and tried to swallow. It’s as dry as the Sahara Desert. It doesn’t matter if you smoke it or pop a weed gummy. IT’S ALWAYS THERE.

This is because THC, the chemical component in marijuana that gets you high, can block the glands in your body that are supposed to produce saliva. Hence, the sand-mouthed dryness.

While definitely a little uncomfortable, it’s nothing to get too bothered over. Grab a drink, sit back, and let the freaking stoned ride begin.

Puf: Before I answer, please allow me to put on my nerdy-but-necessary scientist glasses so I can see better. One second. There we go. All good now.

When it comes to cottonmouth, Blaze hit the nail on the head. Not sure how, but it happened. Guess there’s a first time for everything, eh? So, call it what you want: dry mouth, cottonmouth, or some other slang term. The reality is that cottonmouth SUCKS. I hate it. And it happens to me all the dang time. Especially when I smoke flower and am not stoned off of some other type of cannabis product, like an edible (gross) or a vape.

The funny thing about cottonmouth is that until recently, we really didn’t understand much about how exactly weed causes your mouth to dry up like Spongebob did when visiting his good old buddy, Sandy Cheeks. We all knew from experience that it’s a thing that happens when you smoke weed: your mouth starts to pucker, you feel like your tongue is made of grains of sand, and swallowing becomes an Olympic sport. But what caused it?

Well, we finally have a freaking ANSWERRRRRRRRR. That’s my excitement coming through in all-caps format.

What the new-ish research shows is that THC is now believed to be the cause. It starts with the saliva production in our mouths, which is controlled by our autonomic nervous system. To stimulate saliva production, the brain sends nerve impulses toward the salivary glands. This happens automatically, as you know. We aren’t all sitting around telling our brains to signal our nervous system to produce spit. That would be weird.

Now, when it comes to cottonmouth from THC, scientists believe that the issue happens when the THC you ingest binds to the receptors in the submandibular glands, which stops the glands in your mouth from receiving messages from the nervous system. In turn, they stop producing spit, and your mouth becomes super dry and full of invisible cotton.

Gross but also SO COOL.

That was probably more than you wanted to know, but I don’t care. Can’t stop the nerding out when I have my nerd glasses on. Just try it!

The good news is that you don’t really have to deal with cottonmouth. You aren’t Spongebob. There are special cottonmouth candies you can buy to help temper the issue, or you can just drink some damn water like the rest of us. It’s pretty simple.

Whatever you do, though, don’t think you have to tough out cottonmouth. Ain’t nobody need to deal with that torture.

There are easy solutions, like the faucet and a cup. So next time it happens, get some water and call it a day.

Thanks for coming to my weed Ted Talk.

Do you guys have any good suggestions for music to listen to when I’m stoned?

Blaze: I’m slightly embarrassed to admit that one of my favorite pastimes when I’m stoned is to scream-sing as obnoxiously as possible. I’m sure my neighbors love it.

I’m a poor singer in the best of circumstances but when I’ve had an edible (or two) and I’ve been smoking a bowl or something, the truth is it’s all over for people’s eardrums.

As a result, most recently, I’ve been on a kick listening to really gut-busting singers, so it’s just that much more annoying to listen to me. This includes bands like The Rolling Stones, Pearl Jam, and Black

Sabbath. Sorry, Ozzy. You deserve better. Don’t get me wrong, I love listening to the stoney classics, like Jimi Hendrix, Led Zeppelin, and Tom Petty, but, man I love my scream-sing songs. Sorry for oversharing, everyone!

Puf: Wow. Let me put on my nerd glasses for a second time.

Just kidding. I don’t need them for this because before I got a job writing about weed, I wrote about music so I am a gosh darned expert in stoned music-listening. Consider this your freshman year class on the subject.

So, when it comes to stoned music, I say go with your gut. Every time I smoke I’m in a different music mood. Some days I love blaring awful 1980s hair band music, because there ain’t nothing better than some Night Ranger when you’re on one.

Or, some days I feel like vibing out to something more mellow, so I go with a lit-

tle Marley or stream a reggae station or some junk. Cliche, I know, but it is what it is. I did not shoot the sheriff either, but I sure as heck will listen to Marley wail about it all night long.

And, other times it’s a mix of like Dirty South rap and god knows what else. To me, those are the best nights — the ones where you hit shuffle in your music library and just let the universe pick the soundtrack. You never know what’s going to pop up next. You could go from Rise Against to Halsey to Journey and it’s fine. It feels seamless, despite being anything but.

So, if I had to give you one recommendation, it would be to take that route. Download a bunch of random music (may I suggest Apple Music for this?) and let the iTunes gods take the wheel. Don’t you worry. They know exactly how to steer.

Is using cannabis a

good method to control one’s anxiety? I want to test it out but sometimes weed makes me paranoid.

Blaze: I really think this answer is different for everyone. A couple of years ago, I probably would have said, “no.” Like you, marijuana made me really paranoid to the point where I couldn’t function. All I wanted to do was go to bed so the trip would be over.

These days, however, I’m much more familiar with what I like and how much I can handle in one sitting. As a result, it’s been a really effective way for me to manage my anxiety.

That said, marijuana is obviously not a magic wand that can make your anxiety go away. It may be a good idea for you to consult your doctor or look into getting your medical marijuana card if that’s a route you’re able to take.

Puf: OK, I am really not the person to answer this question at the moment. Let me tell you what happened to me recently. I went to a bar with some friends. I had a couple of drinks. I live close to said bar, so I had everyone follow me home like lost puppies so we could hang out after said drinks.

And, while they were at my home, I whipped out my trusty bong to pass around because it is always time to pass the dutchie to the left hand side in my casa. But what happened? No one else wanted to smoke!

So I did what any good pothead would do: I cashed the bowl myself.

This was a bad, bad, bad, bad, bad idea. The weed I was smoking, which shall not be named, as it is not at fault for my stupidity, caused my anxiety to skyrocket because I wasn’t just smoking out of a bong — I was smoking weed with 32% THC out of a bong.

Shortly after, the world felt like it was

spinning and I felt like I was going to puke. My anxiety was at like thermometer-busting levels, and all I wanted to do was lay down and convince myself I was not going to die.

So,

that’s what I did.

I say all of this because the reality is that if you’re going to smoke weed, there is a good chance that at some point, some product you ingest or flower that you smoke is going to make you anxious and paranoid. It happens.

You can temper the issue, though. As we’ve said in many other columns, CBD can help cut down on the anxiety levels you experience when you’re stoned. You can keep some on hand, or you can choose a strain that has higher levels of CBD in it. Either one might help.

It’s also trial and error. If one strain makes you anxious, try a different one. I stay away from straight sativas for the most part because they ratchet my

anxiety up to uncontrollable levels. But, I survived… and so will you.

Go into it with the right mindset and don’t expect to get anxious. If you do, ride it out and try something new next time. It’s the only way, young Padawan. The only way.

Why am I seeing fewer and fewer medical dispensaries around Colorado?

Blaze: DGO Mag actually covered this story a few years ago. It’s a pretty interesting dilemma because as the rest of the country is starting to become more open to medical marijuana, Colorado seems to be moving in the opposite direction.

Part of the problem is that it’s expensive to license a dispensary, and a lot of business owners don’t want to pay the

expense of having both a medical and recreational side of their business. (Both need their own license.) This also doesn’t include all the regulations dispensary owners have to follow as a medical marijuana business.

This definitely sucks for medical marijuana patients, as medical marijuana cards give them access to highly potent products for cheaper than you’d find in a recreational dispensary, and the taxes are a lot cheaper, too.

Puf: Because the world is unfair and it’s not cool.

So, as Blaze said, we did cover that story a few years ago, and the answer is still true today. The expenses that you’re expected to shell out for licensing both types of dispensaries and the hurdles dispensary owners have to jump through to get the licenses are epic, and it makes it tough to do.

Plus, while there are a lot of medical

patients who need access to higher potencies and fewer restrictions, Colorado isn’t exactly making it easy for medical patients to get what they need right now.

Throw in the fact that there are fewer and fewer doctors who can approve you for medical cannabis in certain areas (Durango being one of them), and you have a recipe for a perfect storm of nonsense for medical patients.

The state of Colorado really needs to make moves to resolve the issue before people are put in bad predicaments. There. I’ve said enough. Off my soapbox. But before I go, I do want to say it’s time to FIX THIS BROKEN SYSTEM.

All right. For real, I’m done.

Thanks for letting me vent.

DGO Pufnstuf Blaze Ridcully

My. Good. GOD. this stuff was no joke. First hit tasted smooth, but I choked, and choked, and choked some more after a couple of seconds of inhaling. At least one part of my soul leaked out while coughing at some point during this bowl. I just know it.

And, that trend continued with every hit I took. Nothing like choking like a noob after every hit. Even if I’d wanted to be discreet about smoking there is no way I could have been.

Luckily, I don’t give a shit about being discreet, but it’s something to keep in mind if you’re an undercover smoker. There is a VERY good chance this strain will make you choke like you’ve never smoked a bowl of weed before. So, buyer beware.

You also won’t be able to hide the fact that you’re stoned out of your gourd after you’ve smoked a bowl of this strain. I don’t know what the hell they did to make Glueball so potent, but whatever they did, it works. This strain ain’t no joke. It seriously took one or two hits for me to really feel the effects of this strain.

I was amused, high as hell, and starving. The only problem with that was that I was so stoned that it felt weird to walk. I

got up to satiate the hunger pangs caused by this strain and it felt like I was slogging through mud with every movement. So that was weird.

I texted my buddy (and your other DGO pothead) Blaze about it, in fact,

because it was such a weird effect to deal with. And, true to form, all I got back was, and I quote, the words: “We’re stoner twins BAHAHAHAHAHAHA.”

Apparently Blaze was ALSO smoking some Glue strain. I can’t remember which

one it was, but I guess we were on the same level from afar. Go freaking figure.

Even more interesting? The rest of this strain’s effects are creepers. It started off with a light head, heavy limbs, and serious hunger pangs, and ended with me laughing to myself before passing out in the same clothes I’d worn all day.

I vaguely remember having the strangest dreams I’d ever had, but what were they? I can’t tell you. I don’t remember. All I remember is waking up and being like, welp, that was weird.

Anyway, I really liked this strain, but good god, do not attempt it if you’re trying to be discreet or if you are trying to function. You can’t hide the fact that you’re smoking Glueball from others. You can’t. You won’t. You’ll be coughing way too hard, and laughing way too loud, to cover your tracks. But, in turn, you will be high and happy as hell, which — for me — is what smoking weed is all about.

DGO Pufnstuf

Dispensary

DURANGO

Border Buds, 1929 US-550, (970) 259-2639, borderbuds.com

Colorado Grow Co., 965 1/2 Main Ave., (970) 259-1647, coloradogrowcompany.com

Durango Organics, Bodo Park, 2 Suttle St., Suite F & G, (970) 259-3674, durangoorganics.com

Durango Organics, Grandview, 37 Co Rd. 232, (970) 426-4381, durangoorganics.com

Durango Rec Room, 145 E College Dr., (970) 764-4087, durangorecroom.com

The Greenery, 208 Parker Ave., Suite E, (970) 403-3710, durangogreenery.com

The Green House, 730 S Camino Del Rio, (970) 247-2420, thegreenhousecolorado.com

Kinfolk Farms, 83A Davidson Creek Rd., (970) 759-8683, kinfolk-farms.com

LOVA Canna Co –Durango, 1135 S Camino Del Rio, Suite 220, (970) 422-8029, lovaco.com

Mammoth Farms Dispensary, 927 CO-3, (970) 422-3282

Mountain Annie’s, 1644 CO Rd. 203, 970247-2190, mountainanniescannabis.com

Prohibition Herb, 1185 Camino Del Rio, (970) 385-8622, prohibitionherb.com

Rocky Mountain High, 120 E 36th St., (970) 259-4093, rockymountainhigh.co

Santé, 742 ½ Main Ave., (970) 375-2837, san-

tecolorado.com

Telluride Bud Company, 3473 Main Ave., (970) 422-8311, telluridebc.com

CORTEZ

Chronic Therapy, 1020 S. Broadway, (970) 529-2045, chronictherapy.com

Doobie Sisters, 695 N Broadway, (970) 5652345, doobiesistersco.com

Durango Organics, 1013 E Main St., (970) 565-6500, durangoorganics.com

The Herbal Alternative, 1531 Lebanon Rd., (970) 529-7007, theherbalalternative.net

LivWell Cortez, 1819 E Main St., (970) 5659577, livwell.com

Mountain Annie’s, 310 E Main St., (970) 5645181, mountainanniescannabis.com

MANCOS

The Cultured Cannabis, 385 N Willow St., (970) 533-9931, theculturedco.com

LivWell Mancos, 101 Railroad Ave., (970) 533-9848, livwell.com

PAGOSA SPRINGS

The Green House, 270 E Pagosa St., (970) 264-4420, thegreenhousecolorado.co

Pagosa Therapeutics, 235 Bastille Dr., (970) 731-4420, pagosatherapeutics.com

San Juan Strains, 356 E Pagosa St., Unit B, (970) 264-5323, sanjuanstrains.com

Smoke Rings, 266 E Pagosa St., (970) 2640942, smokeringsco.com

Pagosa Craft Dispensary, 127 Goldmine Dr., (970) 264-0833,.pagosacraftcannabis.com

High Grade Specialists, 600 Cloman Blvd. #1, (970) 731-3202, highgradespecialists.com

FARMINGTON

The Alchemist, 115 W Main St., (505) 2584180, thealchemistllc.com

Distinguished Dispensary, 4601 English Rd., (505) 278-8524, distinguisheddispensary.com

Dreamz Dispensary, 3501 E Main St., SUITE i-2, (505) 258-4680, dreamzcannabis.com

The Grass Station, 928 E Main St., (505) 2788825, tgs505.com

The Green House, 1901 East 20th St., (505) 258-4752, TheGreenHouseColorado.com

Oasis Cannabis Dispensary, 428 E Main St., (888) 505-3947, oasiscannabisnm.com

Purlife Farmington, 3024 E Main St., STE A, (505) 695-2360, purlifenm.com

The Reef Joint, 3000 E 20th St., Suite D2, (505) 278-8963, thereefjoint.com

Toke Dispensary, 4339 E Main St., Ste A, (505) 278-8823, ziatoke.com

Ultra Health Dispensary Farmington, 4251 E Main St., Suite D, (505) 258-4634, ultrahealth.com/new-mexico-dispensaries/farmington-2/

Farmco, 534 E. Broadway Ave., (833) 777-3276, farmcousa.com

AZTEC

Grady’s Cannabis, 111 N. Main Ave., (505) 333-7456, gradyscannabis.com

Burnin’ Barrels, 2210 W Aztec Blvd., (505) 333-7583

Desert Flower, 111 W Chaco St., (505) 8010833, desertfloweraztec.com

The Green House, 1405 W. Aztec Blvd., TheGreenHouseColorado.com

BLOOMFIELD

Treez, 816 W Broadway Ave., (505) 333-5608 KIRTLAND

Kind Life, 4354 US-64., (505) 716-8774, kindlifenm.com

listings

» Looking for some sweet, sweet weed in the Four Corners region? Look no further than these dispensaries

ASK a of COU�LE POTHEADS

IS HERE FOR YOU!

DGO’s Blaze and Puf answer your weed questions you are too embarrassed to ask anyone else.

Come one, come all with your silly, embarrassing, or just plain weird questions about weed, weed-related issues, and whatever else you can dream up. We’ll do our best to answer them in the best way possible And here we go.