DGO: Surviving Snowdown

art entertainment food drink music nightlife

DGO

FREE! Jan 30-Feb 12, 2020

G N I V I N V R SU WDOW O N S dgomag.com

TO W O KN IVAL O T ED ST E E F N ER OU T Y N G I N HI ’S W T O Y G R EVE DURAN K ROC

FIND YOUR NEXT GREAT EMPLOYEE Thursday, March 12th, from 12pm to 3pm at La Plata County Fairgrounds Exhibit Hall

BOOK YOUR BOOTH TODAY! FIND YOUR PERFECT JOB CANDIDATE AT THIS EVENT Meet and interview job seekers looking for full-time, part-time and seasonal employment.

Contact Us TODAY ABBY FELDMAN 970-375-4599 afeldman@bcimedia.com

SHARON HERMES 970-375-4511 Sharon@durangoherald.com

*Limited space and sponsorships available*

m o r e i n f o r m at i o n at

The Durango Regional Job fair is presented by

FourCornersExpos.com/durango-regional-job-fair

What’s inside

DGO Magazine

STAFF

Volume 5 Number 3 Thursday, January 30, 2020

Editor

It’s the most wonderful, drunken time of the year!

Angelica Leicht aleicht@bcimedia.com 375-4551 Staff writer

It’s Snowdown time in Durango! Thank the rock gods for providing us with such messy, glorious manna from heaven.

You can find all your Snowdown events inside, starting on page 4.

Nick Gonzales ngonzales@bcimedia.com Sales Chandler Sommerfeldt csommerfeldt@bcimedia.com 375-4553 Contributors Erin Brandt Megan Bianco Design/layout Tracie Louck

4 Snowdown events

Guide 4, 10, 16, 18, 19, 23

5

Eat & Drink

Union Social House 5

Mi Ranchito

7 Sound

11 Get Outta Town 16 Weed

Chief Executive Officer Douglas Bennett

8 So long, Snowdown ... hello, concerts!

5 Hanging at Union Social House

V.P. of Advertising Jamie Opalenik

It’s February – it’s cold, and it’s dark, and everyone is hungover from Snowdown. Might as well try and catch some shows around the region.

The Union Social House space itself, at 3602 Main Ave., is bigger than you’d expect. The somewhat-muted, steel-and-concrete-heavy interior would feel spartan if it weren’t for the comfortable couches, wooden furniture and decor inside. There’s even a fireplace.

Tell us what you think!

1.75L

29

SALE

99

El Circo Garnacha

750ml reg $10.98

$

6

SALE

98

Get Outta Town

19

20 Classifieds 22 Sex & love 23 Puzzles/horoscopes

DG O

/dgomag

@dgo_mag

Jan FRE 30-F eb 12 E! , 20 20

ON THE COVER dgo

Got something on your mind? Have a joke or a story idea or just something that the world needs to know?

Send everything to editor@dgomag.com

BUBBLES’ Tito’s BARGAINS Vodka

$

art en drin tertai nm km usic ent fo nigh od tlife

With over a dozen restaurants such within city limits, Durango isn’t exactly hurting for Mexican cuisine. Then again, the more the merrier.

DGO Magazine is published

by Ballantine Communications Inc., P.O. Drawer A, Durango, CO 81302

Reviews 16-17

/dgomag

6 Mole at Mi Ranchito? Yes, por favor!

DGO is a free biweekly publication distributed by Ballantine Communications Inc., and is available for one copy per person. Taking more than five copies of an edition from a distribution location is illegal and is punishable by law according to Colorado Revised Statute 18-9-314.

7

19 Travel

Jerry McBride/Ballantine Media

375-4570

J. Calvin

Concerts 8-9

Reader Services

6

ma

g.c o

m

SURV V ING SNOWID OWN

EVERYT ROCK HING YOU NE DURANG ED O’S WIN TO KNOW TO TER FE STIVAL

Color by no-number... do what you want with it, friends.

Tracie Louck for DGO

Oskar Blues Brewing Canundrum Mix

15pk cans

$

16

SALE

69

970-247-2258 1485 Florida Rd., Bld C, Ste. 100 HOURS: MON - SAT: 9-10 SUNDAY: 10-7

������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������ Thursday, January 30, 2020 | 3

@dg

dg

[snowdown 2020]

Here’s your Snowdown 2020 schedule Hydrate, rest, and then party your proverbial ass off at these Snowdown events SUNDAY JAN. 26 12:30 - 2 PM SNOWDOWN OPENING CEREMONY AT PURGATORY

submitting it). Check the walls of Oscar’s, Olde Tymer’s

bong the world has ever seen! We encourage you to

of races riding tricycles around a special track for prizes

or go to www.SNOWDOWN.org if you wonder what

use anything and everything possible to build a unique

and gift cards. Awards at 6 PM. Must be 18+.

themes have already been used.

one of a kind bong, the sky is the limit! Your bong-tas-

SNOWDOWN SEARCH FOR THE SILVER

On The Beach – Purgatory Resort Hosted by Purgatory Resort. Rev up for SNOW-

BULLET

tic creations can be dropped of at Prohibition Herb Wednesday Jan 29 through Saturday Feb 1. Prohibition Herb makes us want to sing, “where the grass is green

3:30 PM MAKING YOUR OWN MUSICAL INSTRUMENT - FAMILY STYLE Powerhouse Science Center - 1333 Camino Del Rio

Hosted by Coors Light & Four Corners Broadcasting

and the girls are pretty”! Entries will be judged by our

Ceremony! Start the fun with DJ Cody at 12:30 PM

Now in its 22nd year! This event challenges all

esteemed panel of judges, and winners will be picked

ages as you are invited to make your own rockin’ musi-

followed by a Ski Parade down the “Hill” to pass the

explorers, adventurers and the very clever to find

on Sunday Feb 2 at 4:20 PM. Please ensure your bong

cal instrument with our Science Center and MakerLab

SNOWDOWN torch from 2019 to NOW. Come ski in

the “Silver Bullet!” Somewhere out there among the

is free of cannabis residue! Dirty bongs will not be

experts. All ages welcome!

costume and you can join the parade! Meet at the 6

cliffs and canyons, mountains and meadows of La

pack lift at 1 PM for the ride up and ski down to follow

Plata County, the Silver Bullet will be hidden! Find the

the torch. The torch will light the opening flame and the

Silver Bullet before anyone else and win $250 in cash,

2021 THEME WINNER will be announced!

glory and other wonderful prizes! How it works; each

DOWN 2020 at the First Annual pre-party Opening

day starting Monday Jan 27, clues will be released on THESE EVENTS ARE HAPPENING ALL WEEK:

RADIO 101.3 & KRSJ 100.5 radio stations that will help you in your search. You must be creative and smart in

SNOWDOWN THEME CONTEST

your solution of these clues to find the Silver Bullet

A making, tinkering and experimenting event for all

accepted. Must be 21+.

4 PM HOT WING EATING CONTEST TWISTED SYSTEM Conundrum Escape Rooms - 736 Main Ste 100 Prove that you are Durango’s smartest by solving an

Animas City Theatre - 128 E College Dr (Next to Cuckoo’s) Hosted by Cuckoo’s Chicken House. Can you handle

almost inconceivable enigma of exceptionally difficult

the heat? Drop by Cuckoo’s for a full set of rules and to

proportions. Time is limited, and you must work alone,

sign up as early as Jan 22. Limited to first 20 entries.

but be the fastest to conquer this perplexing challenge

Must be 18+.

and you will gain the coveted title of Durango’s Top

Magpies’s Newsstand Cafe – 707 Main

and claim your veritable plethora of prizes. Remember

Puzzler! Stop by Conundrum Escape Rooms any day of

4 PM ROCKIN’ ROLLIN’ OYSTER SLURPIN’

This theme contest is for 2022 because themes

there is no second place in this contest…there is only

SNOWDOWN between 11 AM and 7 PM to try your

CONTEST

are chosen 2 years in advance. The winner will be

one Silver Bullet! Registration is not required but you

hand at solving the TWISTED SYSTEM! Ages 8 - 100+.

announced during the Purgatory event. Let your imag-

must be 21+.

ination run wild!! Submit your entries at Magpie’s no later than NOON Sunday Feb 2. *Note: no obscene (ie,

BUILD - A - BONG CONTEST

nasty) or redundant (this means we already did it and

Prohibition Herb – 1185 Camino Del Rio

won’t be doing that same theme again so don’t bother

Use your imagination to build the most rockin’

DURANGO’S LARGEST PREMIUM CANNABIS DISPENSARY

THURSDAY

oyster eating? In 2005, he ate 233 oysters in just three

LIPS ON JAGGER CHALLENGE

minutes! How many oysters can you slurp down in 1

ReLove, Consign & Design - 110 E 5th St Rock N’ Roll your way to the Radio 101 Warming 2020 SNOWDOWN Follies Tickets! Test your skills at ‘Pin the Lips on Jagger’ – after a quick spin wearing a blindfold, try your best to hit the mark and pin the lips on Mic Jagger. The top 3 placements will be awarded prizes, with first place winning a pair of 2020 SNOWDOWN Follies tickets! It can get mighty chilly rocking

970-375-BUDS 742½ Main Ave. Durango (IN THE ALLEY)

from event to event, so come on in and warm up with a

Hey Snowdown, check out our ROCKIN’ DEALS!

specialty drink and try your luck. Must be 21+.

1 PM CHIKIN FLICKIN’ BUCKET BONANZA

Ask about our new REWARDS PROGRAM!

minute? Men’s and Women’s categories.

4 PM NAME THAT TUNE 8th Avenue Tavern - 509 E 8th Ave (College Plaza) Contestants will listen to short (3-20 second) clips of songs before the music stops. Contestants are asked to write down the title of the song, the artist of the song and periodically the year the song came out. The song title, name of artist and year of release are each worth one point. The highest score at the end of the event wins! Teams are permitted. No cheating please.

That includes looking at other contestants’ answers and most definitely the use of smart phones, tablets and

Bird’s - 2957 Main

laptops. Let the good tunes roll! Must be 21+.

Join us for a hilarious outdoor game of throwing

4 PM BOOZIN’ BEACONS

rubber chickens at a chicken bucket target. Teams of four will compete to have the lowest score at the end of

• Best selection • Best THC%’s • Educated budtenders

Did you know, a man named Colin Shirlow, aka The Oyster King, holds the Guinness World Record for

10:30 AM - 1 PM WARMING HUT & PIN THE

Hut for a morning treat and a chance to win a pair of

WWW.SANTECOLORADO.COM

Highway 3 Roadhouse - 955 Hwy 3

our Chickin Flickin’ course. Must be 18+ 1 PM FAMILY FEUD Seasons Rotisserie & Grill - 764 Main This game is similar to the TV classic, but with a SNOWDOWN 2020 flair! Four 4-person teams will compete for the top prize! Must be 21+.

Eolus - 919 Main (rooftop) Hosted by Friends of the San Juans. This is a rollicking collision of libations and life-saving skills incorporating teamwork, knowledge of the downtown bar scene and skills with Avalanche Beacons. Teams are sent out across Durango. Games begin at Eolus where all teams are to return by 7 PM. Proceeds benefit Friends of the San Juans and SNOWDOWN. Limited to 10 teams of 3-4 people. BYO Beacon and camera

2 PM BIG WHEEL DERBY The Balcony - 600 Main Ste 205 Each contestant does a timed lap around the balcony on a Big Wheel! Hopefully, the required helmet won’t mess up your costume! Must be 18+.

2 PM GROADIE TRICYCLE RACE 11th Street Station - 1101 Main Competitors will compete in a tournament-style set

phone. Must be 21+.

4:30 PM SNOWDOWN KIDS FOLLIES - SECOND PERFORMANCE Durango Arts Center Theater - 802 E 2nd Ave 5 PM SNOWDOWN TYE DOWN “FLY TYING CONTEST”

Continued on Page 10

4 | Thursday, January 30, 2020 ••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

[drink]

Checking out the Union Social Houses’ featured cocktails

»» Bar on north Main Avenue opened

in December in Durango The Union Social House — a bar, gallery, and food truck-based eatery — opened in late December on north Main Avenue in Durango.

According to The Durango Herald, longtime Durango events planner Carol Clark created it as a “vintage game house,” providing a space for parents to have a casual drink, while their children play games.

I’m a casual drinker who plays games, so I decided to check it out.

The space itself, at 3602 Main Ave., is bigger than you’d expect. The somewhat muted steel-and-concreteheavy interior would feel spartan if it weren’t for the comfortable couches, wooden furniture, and decor inside.

There’s even a fireplace. (Gas, albeit – but hey, it emits heat!)

In the very back, past the bar, there’s a window opening up into the Backcountry Gourmet food truck, which has sliders, fries, and the like.

On the day I went, the food truck was open until just before the bar closed.

There are two pinball machines in the back – The Simpsons and The Munsters, for you pinball aficionados.

The bar had six beers on tap: Ska

Brewing Co.’s Euphoria, Eddyline Brewery’s Raspberry Wheat, Telluride Brewing Co.’s RedFISH and Ski-in-Ski-Stout, Bell’s Brewery’s Two Hearted Ale, and Coors. There were also a number of other beers and wine available.

What caught my eye, though, were the four featured cocktails, all of which seem to be based on songs (or, at the very least, lyrics): Around The World; Can’t Stop, Won’t Stop; Halfway There; and Walk This Way. They were based in gin, tequila, whiskey, and vodka respectively.

I let my affinity for all things tequila make my first choice – Can’t Stop, Won’t Stop – which also contained pamplemousse and grapefruit juice.

In case you don’t parlez français, pamplemousse is also grapefruit – in this case, a liqueur. So between the double grapefruit (a bold fruit if there ever was one) and the tequila you’d think this cocktail would be overpowering, right? Not really. The result was a light pink drink that was neither too fruity nor heavy on the tequila.

I assume the drink was named after the Young Gunz track from 2003,

Jerry McBride/BCI Media

»» The Union Social House opened on north Main Avenue in late December. maybe because “the girls, the girls, they love us, cause we stay fresh to death; we the best, nothing less.”

Whatever the case, I let my musical taste pick the next drink.

Around The World, which I mentally associated with the Daft Punk song, is gin, lime juice, and Aperol. That last ingredient is an Italian apéritif made with gentian, cinchona, and rhubarb, like a milder, sweeter Campari. It tastes a bit like rhubarb, bitter herbs,

and burnt orange. Add to that the already herbal flavor of gin, and you’ve got a drink with a very herbal, sort of fruity, complex flavor profile. Like a Daft Punk song.

I didn’t try the other two cocktails – I’m saving them for some night when I’m feeling classic rock. Will we back?

Definitely. Union seems like a good place to be social.

—— Nick Gonzales

Happy Snowdown!

When in doubt, turn the music up.

GREAT STRAIN SELECTION • HASH & CONCENTRATE • EDIBLES • SEEDS • CLONES PIPES • SMOKING ACCESSORIES • APPAREL • MJ LITERATURE & CONSULTING • ATM ON-SITE

»» The Can’t Stop, Won’t Stop cocktail is tequila-based and not as grapefruity as you would expect based on its ingredients.

Nick Gonzales/DGO photos

»» The Around the World is a very herbal, sort of fruity cocktail based in gin.

Grandview Location (Durango) RECREATIONAL ONLY 9am - 8pm 37 County Road 232 (970) 426-4381

Bodo Park Location (Durango) MED 9am - 6:45pm REC 9am - 8pm 72 Suttle St. Units F & G (970) 259-3674

Cortez Location MED & REC 9am - 8:30pm 1104 E. Main Street Cortez, CO 81321 (970) 565-6500

The Alternative Resource

������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������ Thursday, January 30, 2020 | 5

[eat]

Mi Ranchito offers something different in amid Durango’s Mexican food scene » Restaurant’s bright red mole a tangy surprise

pleasant kick, and I think it deserves your consideration as a brunch drink alongside mimosas.

With over a dozen restaurants or so within city limits, Durango isn’t exactly hurting for Mexican cuisine.

Then again, the more the merrier.

Almost all of them have a different take on the fare of our neighbors to the south, weaving different flavors into the tapestry that makes up our food scene.

Mi Ranchito Family Restaurant, located on the west 100 block of College Drive, where BREW Pub & Kitchen used to be, isn’t new in the strictest sense. Its owner, Jaime Lariz, was also responsible for San Marcos Mexican Restaurant out west on U.S. Highway 160 and No Way Jose’s further up Main Avenue downtown. Nevertheless, we decided to drop in for lunch one day and check it out.

You can often judge the quality of a Mexican restaurant by the salsa that arrives at your table the moment you

Nick Gonzales/DGO

»» Mi Ranchito’s tangy red mole sauce set its enchiladas apart from the same dish you might get at other Durango restaurants. The Regular Margarita at Mi Ranchito ought to be a brunch drink. After all, it contains orange juice.

sit down. Mi Ranchito’s seemed like a pretty basic red, but it easily passed the test, with some chiles in there packing some noticeable heat.

My dining companion chose to abstain – it was still pretty early in the

Celebrate Snowdown with us!

day – while I ordered a margarita. As a concession to the rather arbitrary position of the sun in the sky, I got the regular margarita, which unlike the house margarita, also contains orange juice. The extra flavor adds a

NEW YEAR, NEW CAREER!

15% OFF! Total Purchase

*Excludes PAX and Volcano.

Valid Jan. 26 - Feb. 2 Snowdown 2020

72 Suttle St. Unit B, Bodo Park Durango

SO YOU CAN GET MATCHED TO YOUR DREAM JOB.

EVERETT STREET

OFFICE DEPOT

LIGHT

(BODO PARK)

Tinctures Edibles Lotions Concentrates

info@swvapor.com

4CORNERSJOBS.COM LET’S YOU EXPLORE JOBS ANONYMOUSLY

SUTTLE STREET

~Your Source for CBD Products~ 970-247-1261

72 SHUTTLE STREET UNIT B

Premium e-liquids, e-cigs, local glass, water pipes, dab rigs & accessories

FRONTAGE ROAD

The area’s best selection of vaping products

HWY 550 (CAMINO DEL RIO)

SOUTHWEST VAPOR

DON’T JUST SEARCH FOR ANY JOB. FIND ONE THAT’S RIGHT FOR YOU!

Try Real-Time Job Matching™ & get hired FAST. 4CornersJobs.com

As for our meals, my assistant got the Mi Ranchito Burrito – a flour tortilla filled with skirt steak, grilled green chile, and refried beans and topped with green sauce. He found the green chile mild but flavorful and said the peppers added a lot to the tangy green sauce. The steak was a thinner cut than a typical carne asada, very tender and lightly spiced.

I think he enjoyed it.

Meanwhile, I got the lunch special of the day, mole enchiladas.

Mole is easily one of my favorite elements of Mexican cuisine and it’s fascinating to see different cooks churn out different variations of it. The term mole refers loosely to a number of different sauces, not just the chocolaty mole poblano your average gabacho is familiar with. Even just within Durango, some restaurants have a very sweet mole while others have a sauce that leans hard into smoky ancho chiles.

Mi Ranchito’s mole was bright red, tangy, and acidic in a very citrusy sort of way. It was a wonderful surprise – the worry is always that a place will default to the stereotype. The chicken enchiladas themselves were an excellent delivery vehicle for the sauce, and I’d definitely keep any eye out for the sandwich board advertising this special again.

If you’re interested in checking the place out, you’re about to have a wider timespan to do so. When the restaurant first opened, Lariz said he’d start keeping it open late, and it sounds like he’s going to keep that promise. The restaurant will be open until 3 a.m.

Friday and Saturday during Snowdown and then every Friday and Saturday going forward.

For more information, check out Mi Ranchito on Facebook or call (970) 4228514.

—— Nick Gonzales

6 | Thursday, January 30, 2020 ••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

[sound]

Durango groove band J-Calvin releases first conceptual music video

BREAK OUT OF THE WINTER BLUES WORK DOWNTOWN IN A FUN AND CREATIVE ENVIRONMENT

»» Funky musicians collaborate with Seattle

artist Chris Mighton

FIRST DAY FREE! • Daily Drop-in • 5-punch Passes • Monthly Membership • Dedicated Desk • Meeting Rooms The video’s visuals depict Mighton creating seven different pieces, with varying levels of abstractness.

In January, the band released its first conceptual music video – their first in which the visuals are not just the band playing, that is. Titled “Don’t Stop Me,” the video pairs one of several singles J-Calvin recorded last summer with shots of seven works being created

by Seattle-based artist Chris Mighton (who also edited the video together).

The result is a smooth, jazz-laced mixture of subtle spontaneity and haunting vocals.

“A lot of people feel like things are holding them back in life,” said Jesse Ogle, who wrote the song. “The idea of the song is that really it’s us holding us back. ... To move forward, I have to basically make that possible from within.”

Ogle is the leader of the band and its bassist. He says the song is notable

from a vocal standpoint, as it represents the transition between the band’s former vocalist, Sarah Pumpian, and its new one, Gracie Jessop, who carries the background vocals in the song.

Loyalty Program & Daily Specials!

Fans of J-Calvin will be happy to know that the band has started a Patreon and will release exclusive music to subscribers.

As independent artists touring Arizona, New Mexico, and Colorado, J-Calvin’s mission is not to just build fans bases around the Southwest but also build relationships with other independent artists, Ogle said. The goal is to create a community that will result in artists coming to Durango, and Durango artists being brought to other towns.

When the band isn’t playing or one the road, all five members are instructors at Durango’s iAM Music Institute, teaching kids and adults their various instruments.

For more information, videos, and live tour dates for J-Calvin, visit jcalvinmusic.com.

rspacedurango.com

R E C R E AT I O N A L D I S P E N S A R Y

DA I LY Specials

House bud strains for

7

$

a gram

GRANDVIEW AREA MAP WIlson Gulch Drive

Durango Pet Resort

Kinfolk Farms

East Owen Road

On New Year’s Eve 2017, soul/ funk/groove band J-Calvin band came together and played their first live show for a Durango audience. Since then, the band has released an album, headlined the iAM Music Fest, played a showcase set at the Telluride Jazz Fest, and played more than 150 shows while touring the Western United States.

970-422-1285

Three Springs Blvd

Courtesy of J-Calvin

»» For its latest music video, J-Calvin collaborated with Seattle-based artist Chris Mighton.

AJ’s Geenhouse Nursery

Southwest Appliance

160

Davidson Creek Road

160

Oh-Hi 4 Pack for

25

$

Now offering online order for pickup on

Weed love to help you!

All Items Include Tax · 8am-8pm, Seven Days A Week (970)759-8683 · 83 Davidson Creek Road Durango, CO

—— Nick Gonzales

������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������ Thursday, January 30, 2020 | 7

[sound]

February brings cover bands to Durango, The New Pornographers and Ani DiFranco to Santa Fe It’s February – it’s cold, and it’s dark, and everyone is hungover from Snowdown. Might as well try and catch some shows around the region.

The Animas City Theatre is hopping this month, with acts such as The Lil Smokies and Tnertle ... in addition to both Back Sabbath and Led Zepplin covers. Meanwhile, down in Santa Fe, you might have a chance to see The New Pornographers or Ani DiFranco – though, at this point, you’ll probably need to buy the tickets off someone else.

Don’t stay at home and sulk as we wait for spring to return. Hit the road (or stay in Durango) and rock out.

Durango International Guitar Night, Community Concert Hall, 7:30 p.m., $29+

p.m., $37+

February 13

Zoso, Animas City Theatre, 8:30 p.m., $22-$25

KBong, Animas City Theatre, 8 p.m., $18-$20 February 14 Andy Thorn, Animas City Theatre, 8 p.m., $15-$20 February 15 » Ani DiFranco

February 6-7 The Lil Smokies, Animas City The-

February 6

KDUR Black Sabbath Cover Night, Animas City Theatre, 8 p.m., $20

atre, 8:30 p.m., $20-$25 February 8

February 26

February 27 The Expendables, Animas City Theatre, 9 p.m., $29.95-$35 Albuquerque February 1

The High Kings, Community Concert Hall, 7:30 p.m., $29+

Sam Riggs, Dirty Bourbon, 7 p.m., $10+

Tnertle, Animas City Theatre, 8:30 p.m., $10-$12

The Sandstoners, Tractor Brewing Co., 8 p.m.

February 22

Los Tigres del Norte, Isleta Resort & Casino, 8 p.m., $55

Magic Beans, Animas City Theatre, 8:30 p.m., $15-$20 February 6 San Juan Symphony – Beethoven@250, Community Concert Hall, 3

February 4 Jennifer Westwood and the Handsome Devils, Steel Bender Brewyard, 6 p.m.

Spend an evening with Two Hearts Sunday, March 1, 2020 4 p.m. to 7 p.m.

Doubletree Hotel in Durango, Colorado

Saying Yes was just the beginning Now accepting participating businesses and sponsors please contact: Abby 970-375-4599 afeldman@bcimedia.com Sharon 970-375-4511 sharon@durangoherald.com More information at FourCornersExpos.com

8 | Thursday, January 30, 2020 ••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

» The New Pornographers

feb

6+7

lil smokes

feb

kdur cover night black sabbath

feb

kbong

feb

14

sticks-n-thorn

feb

tnertle

feb

magic beans

8

13

Periphery, Sunshine Theater, 8 p.m., $22 February 6 Shake the Baby Till the Love Comes Out, Sister Bar, 7 p.m., $5 February 8 Tracy Lawrence, Isleta Resort & Casino, 8 p.m., $20+ February 13 Black Tiger Sex Machine, Historic El Rey Theater, 8 p.m., $29.99-34.99 February 19 Blunts & Blondes, Historic El Rey Theater, 9 p.m., $17.99-$79 Poppy, Sunshine Theater, 8 p.m., $22 February 21

Pepper, Sunshine Theater, 8 p.m., $20 Santa Fe

February 14

February 1

Red Light Cameras, Meow Wolf, 8 p.m., $16

EOTO, Meow Wolf, 8 p.m., $18 February 3 Surf Curse, Meow Wolf, 7 p.m., $16 February 6 The New Pornographers, Meow Wolf, 7 p.m., $45 February 7 Wolf Parade, Meow Wolf, 8 p.m., $25 February 8 BAYNK, Meow Wolf, 9 p.m., $15 February 10 GARZA, Meow Wolf, 7 p.m., $29.50

The Used, Sunshine Theater, 8 p.m., $32

February 11

February 22

Murder by Death, Meow Wolf, 7 p.m., $23

Hirie, Historic El Rey Theater, 8 p.m., $20

Ani DiFranco, Meow Wolf, 7 p.m., $38

February 12

February 15 Hot BOi Showcase, Meow Wolf, 8 p.m., $19.50 February 18 Pinegrove, Meow Wolf, 7 p.m., $20 February 22 Autograf, Meow Wolf, 9 p.m., $16.50 February 25 Magic City Hippies, Meow Wolf, 7 p.m., $17.50

February 26 Rome & Duddy, Sister Bar, 8 p.m., $29.95-$35 PUP the Band, Sunshine Theater, 8 p.m., $20 February 27 Kottonmouth Kings, Hed PE, and Whitney Peyton, Sunshine Theater, 8 p.m., $22 February 28 The Commodores, Isleta Resort & Casino, 8 p.m., $30+

22

February 27 Minnesota, Meow Wolf, 9 p.m., $20

feb

February 28 Joseph, Meow Wolf, 8 p.m., $33.50 February 29 Big Freedia, Meow Wolf, 9 p.m., $25

February 23 Ezra Furman, Sister Bar, 7 p.m., $12

15

G Y R F A F MS U L F ebruary 13th and Friday, February 14 F , y a d s th.

T hu r Half hour visitation with choice of puppy, adult dog or kitten.

$100 includes a box of RMCF chocolate, rose, card and we will email a picture as well! (while supplies last)

Limited space available, contact our Foster Coordinator at foster@lpchumanesociety.org or 970-903-6873

La Plata County Humane Society

1111 S Camino Del Rio | Durango, CO 81303 · www.lpchumanesociety.org

zozo

the ultimate 26 led zeppelin experience

For Tickets visit:

Animas City Theatre or Animas Trading Co

WEEKLY EVENTS Tuesdays @ 6:30 Trivia Factory Wednesdays @ 8:30 Open Mic Night

All events FREE w/ great prizes & drink specials! www.AnimasCityTheatre.com

������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������ Thursday, January 30, 2020 | 9

[snowdown 2020] From Page 4

for a low key kayak pool slalom for everyone to enjoy.

Playboat paddlers are encouraged to come join the

The San Juan Angler - 600 Main Ste 202 Fly Tying Contest. Most creative flies in 3 categories (SM, MD, LG) with materials provided. Fly tying knowledge not required. All ages welcome!

5:30 PM MOCK AND ROLL Starting at the Strater Hotel - 699 Main

fun. Several slalom race kayaks will be available for loan.

7 PM ROCK AND ROLL PINBALL SNOWDOWN SHOWDOWN J Bo’s Pizza and Ribs - 1301 Florida Rd Did you know an Elvis pinball machine still resides

Durango Arts Center Theater - 802 E 2nd Ave 8 PM SNOWDOWN BEARD GROWING COMPETITION

FRIDAY ALL DAY SNOWDOWN T-SHIRT DAY Take advantage of the day and don a favorite

Carver Brewing Company - 1022 Main

SNOWDOWN apparel item - the one, the only, the

Welcome to the 10th Annual Beard Growing

super cool 2020 (Deep Purple!) SNOWDOWN T-shirt!

Competition! Contestants entering the “Beard Race”

Long-sleeved, for winter warmth! Get yours today at

showed up clean shaven at Carver’s in November to

Magpie’s Newsstand and other fine local establish-

have their mug shot as proof they didn’t get a head

ments. Wear it with style and show your support of SNOWDOWN!

in Graceland? Well, Rock and Roll Pinball SNOW-

start. These substantially furrier lads will present their

coholic pub crawl celebrating local Mocktail menus.

DOWN Showdown is a fun and exciting pinball tour-

faces Thursday to a panel of judges. We will award

10 AM SNOWDOWN SCAVENGER HUNT -

Begin at The Strater Hotel Pullman Room to get your

nament for rock stars to display their Pinball Wizard

prizes to the winner then continue with other fun

JUDGING

passport. You’ll have three hours to make 5 stops in

skills here in beautiful Durango, our own personal

beard challenges! Lots of prizes and lots of fun will be

downtown Durango. Return to the Strater Hotel for

“Graceland”. This is a 3 strike tournament. You will be

had by all! Must be 21+.

prizes and a dance party. Must be 18+.

matched up in groups of 4. The top 2 winners from

Hosted by Young People in Recovery. A non-al-

5:30 PM ROCKIN’ FAMILY DANCE PARTY Durango Dance - 3416 Main Ste 101 Dance the cold away! Families are welcome to this upbeat, positive, boogie woogie dance party! Led by

each group will earn no strikes per round, whilst the

8 PM DRAG RACE AND FASHION SHOW

that the lyrics still live, even a deaf, dumb, and blind kid

Hosted by El Rancho Tavern & The Spaah Shop.

sure plays a mean pinball!!!! A night of free pinball play

Come strut your stuff and dress in your best Queen or

with $5 entry into the tournament. Must be 18+.

shoes with a Frisbee but all we know is that it’s FUN!

King of the Drag! Dance Party to follow! Must be 21+.

Two people per team must be 18+.

7 PM TALKIN S***-”AN AMATEUR COME-

8 PM ARM WRESTLING TOURNAMENT

1 PM SNOWDOWN SENIOR BINGO

DY COMPETITION” Down the Rabbit Hole - 640 Main

Hosted by Ignacio Youth Services. This all-pure-nat-

Hosted by Comic Uprising. A “Voice”- Style Com-

naturally and raises money for awesome after-school, outdoor adventure positive youth development programs in Ignacio, staffed by real Rock Stars! The youth are the referees, so treat ‘em with respect. Each team consists of 6 members, including at least 2 women.

Must be 16+. Spectators of all ages welcome!

6 PM BEER PONG 6 PM 3-ON-3 SPORTS CHAIR BASKETBALL TOURNAMENT

petition. But with comedy! Limited to 10 contestants minutes of material. Three comics will take on the role

Animas River Lounge at the DoubleTree - 501

Dahhling! It’s like the beer pong but with a much better beverage! Only one wins in the round robin

1st Annual 3-on-3 Sports chair tournament open

dance off for our odd number elimination rounds. We award for costumes too! The entry fee is $10.00 per

Adaptive Organization, a non-profit created by Duran-

person and will include a pair of balls and plenty of

go local Noah Blue Elk Hotchkiss whose mission is to

bubbles for your plastic glassware. Must be 21+.

8 PM SNOWDOWN FOLLIES GALA PREMIER PERFORMANCE Henry Strater Theatre - 699 Main

tournament!

The grand gala of the SNOWDOWN Follies – A no-

Starlight Lounge - 937 Main Race to the finish on your magic carpet. Must be

8:30 PM FLIPPY CUP

opposite sides of the board, down a cup of beer, then use the launchers to to to flip the cup upisde down before moving on to drink the next one!f

torioulsy irreverent show performed by an all-volunteer cast and crew. To purchase tickets for this event, you must place your name on the official gala wait list created on April 1st 1997 (almost a quarter century

fun afternoon of Bingo. Did you know the Senior Center has great lunches with a salad bar? Did you know they have Zumba, line dancing, computers, a library and even a thrift store and transportation too? Check it out! Must be over 60 to play. Costumes welcome!

2 PM SERVICE INDUSTRY SCRAMBLE Steamworks Brewing Co - 801 E 2nd Ave (in the

8:30 PM GUINNESS GAMES - ANTS IN THE PANTS

alley) Traditionally one of SNOWDOWN’S wildest

The Irish Embassy Pub - 900 Main

events! Coed teams of your favorite local servers

We’re changing it up this year! YOU will wear the

from area restaurants compete in a fun and frequently

pants and your partner will try to fling the ants into

messy obstacle course incorporating waiting skills

them! Arrive early to sign up and play. Must be 18+.

with a bit of a SNOWDOWN twist! Teams must be

9 PM PICK UP LINE CONTEST

the sports chairs. This will be a fun and competitive

6:30 PM MAGIC CARPET RIDE

your local La Plata County Senior Center and stay for a

A good ole flippy cup race where players stand on

Camino del Rio

Bring your friends for Bingo at the La Plata County

Registration fees go toward prize money. Must be 18+.

That’s a lot of funny! Must be 21+.

7 PM CHAMPAGNE PONG

La Plata County Senior Center - 2424 N Main

Senior Center! This is a great opportunity to check out

Starlight Lounge - 937 Main

to people of all abilities. This is a fundraiser for Tribal

skills clinic prior to the event to get experience with

Single elimination bracket tournament with 6

What began as “garbage can frisbee” in the 1980’s, later turned into KanJam! Some call it playing horse-

weight categories in both men’s and women’s divisions.

of judges/mentors with 5 additional comic performers.

competition but we also have our “not so famous”

of Native Americans. All participants can attend a free

Wild Horse Saloon - 601 E 2nd Ave

who should come prepared with a minimum of 2

FLC Life Center Basketball Courts - 1000 Rim Dr

use sports as a tool to improve the health and wellness

Balcony Bar & Grill - 600 Main Ste 205

El Rancho Tavern - 975 Main

Durango Recreation Center - 2700 Main

ural adrenaline event also increases dopamine levels

1 PM KANJAM

players in 3rd and 4th will earn strikes. Come prove

Durango Dance professional teachers.

5:30 PM DODGEBALL

Billy Goat Saloon - 39848 HWY 160 (Gem Village)

Animas City Theater - 128 E College Dr (next to Cuckoo’s) Got a good one liner or two you think will increase your chances of getting lucky? Test your best pickup lines before a live audience! A panel of knowledgeable judges will determine if you’ve got what it takes to seal the deal. Must be 21+.

comprised of 2 male and 2 female members of local restaurant wait staff over the age of 21. All teams are required to show their ID and sign a waiver before competing. See you there!

3 PM SUPER SEXY ROCK N ROLL CAR WASH 11th Street Station - 1101 Main “And we all shine on.” Be the bravest babe or bro out there by donning your sexy super rock n roll gear,

21+.

ago!) To get on the list, email SNOWDOWNfollies@

6:30 PM ROCK N’ SCIENCE TRIVIA

gmail.com.

Starlight Lounge - 937 Main

a classic car for up to one minute. Judged by a panel of

7:30 PM BATTLE OF THE HAIR BANDS

Winner of MC/DJ battle from Wednesday plays!

three very qualified judges. Must be 21+.

The Powerhouse - 1333 Camino del Rio Get ready for a rockin’ trivia night at The Powerhouse! Our trivia consists of four rounds, there is always one scientific round and one picture round.

Assemble a team of five or come solo and join one! All ages welcome.

6:30 PM KAYAK POOL SLALOM Durango Community Recreation Center - 2700 Main Hosted by Durango Whitewater and Durango Parks & Rec. Join paddlers from Durango Whitewater

Animas City Theatre - 128 E College Dr Battle of the hAir Bands - Have you always envisioned yourself on stage with Poison or Dokken rockin the house? Well, now is your chance! The Animas City Theatre welcomes all true hair band fans to show us what you got! In order to enter you must have a full “air” band, no instruments allowed, with at least two song ideas from that band.

10 PM SNOWDOWN THURSDAY PLURSDAY

Live music and dancing! Must be 21+.

10 PM KARAOKE CONTEST 8th Avenue Tavern - 509 E 8th Ave (College Plaza) Contestants will choose and sing a song. They will be judged by their technical skills, vocals and overall presentation(showmanship). This event will take place Thursday, Friday and Saturday night with 1st, 2nd, 3rd place awarded every night. If you take first place you

7:30 PM SNOWDOWN TEEN FOLLIES -

cannot compete again. This is a solo event. Please no

SECOND PERFORMANCE

crowd help. Bring on the singing! Must be 21+.

getting all soapy and wet (snow or shine!) and washing

4 PM BED RACES 100 Club - Between 7th & 8th on Main On a dark desert highway, cool wind in my hair…I must be riding in the Bed Races again! Participate in Durango’s craziest and most fun event in what is sure to be an action-packed spectacle. Compete head-tohead against other teams for the Bed Race Trophy.

4 PM 2020 ROTARY RED BALL EXPRESS

Continued on Page 16

10 | Thursday, January 30, 2020 ••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

[travel]

GET OUTTA TOWN:

Check out the ruins of mountainous military facility Camp Hale

»» Site was used to train Americans in 1940s,

Tibetans in ’60s It’s December 1939 and Finland is under attack.

Joseph Stalin has sent 400,000 troops of the world’s largest infantry force, the Red Army, into the Scandinavian nation.

Unchallenged by a country lacking the proper ammunition, a thousand Soviet tanks roll through across the snowy land, seizing large tracts of the Karelian Isthmus.

ROCKY MOUNTAIN HIGH Durango's Canna Castle

Snowdown Snowdown

Bomber Bowling Bowling @T he Canna Castle

Courtesy of brent flanders/Flickr

»» Now ruins north of Leadville, Camp Hale was once used to train the 10th Mountain Diviision during World War II and, covertly, Tibetan guerrillas in the 1960s.

Suddenly, white-clad figures swoop in like ghosts between the trees. They approach the tanks, close enough to pry bits and pieces off in some cases, and toss Molotov cocktails and bombs into unguarded exhaust ports – a design flaw of the tanks uncovered by Finnish engineers. The tanks explode from the inside slowing the advance of Stalin’s army and giving Finland a chance to win the Winter War by mid-March 1940, losing fewer than 50,000 soldiers compared to the Soviet Union’s 200,000 deaths. The Finnish military’s secret, primitive weapon? Skis.

Half a world away, Charles Dole, president of the then-new National Ski Patrol, used the success of the Finnish in fighting away their invaders to petition the United States Army to develop a similar ski-mounted fighting force.

And it worked. In October 1941, Army Chief of Staff Gen. George Marshall ordered the formation of a mountain-based battalion. Just in time, too – on Dec. 7 of that year, Japan attacked Pearl Harbor, bringing the U.S. into World War II. A valley between Leadville and Vail was chosen as the site for Camp Hale, the new home of what became the 10th Light Division (Alpine) and then the 10th Mountain Division. Construction of a barracks, hospitals for both people and animals, ammunition bunkers and recreation facilities began in 1942. Soldiers trained there and at the nearby Cooper Hill with skis, winter camouflage and vehicles designed

to for use on snow. The base was also used to hold German prisoners of war.

In 1945, troops from the camp were finally deployed to Italy, and the division was disbanded at the war’s end. Some of the soldiers returned to Colorado and helped establish ski resorts in places like Vail and Aspen.

Meanwhile, during the early ’60s, the CIA took over the camp for clandestine purposes. To keep people away, the agency circulated stories that atomic tests were being conducted. But really, it had become a training cite for Tibetan guerrillas.

Nicknamed “Dhumra,” or “The Garden,” by the Tibetans, the site was selected for its resemblance to the Himalayan Mountains. By the time the camp was dismantled and given to the Forest Service in 1965, nearly 260 Tibetans were trained at the site to resist the Chinese and keep Tibet autonomous. That effort, evidently, didn’t go as well as it could have.

Today you can visit the ruins of Camp Hale about 17 miles north of Leadville on U.S. Highway 24. The skeletons of several barracks and bunkers remain. If you see something that looks like something that might blow up, though, don’t pick it up, poke at it, or throw rocks at it. The Army Corps of Engineers began an effort in 2003 to clear the area of unexploded ordnance, but you never know.

—— Nick Gonzales

Bowl a teammate down a snow covered lane. Earn points by hitting pins with your skiing, human bowling ball.

02/ 01/ 2020 @ 10:30AM -21+ -Free Sign Up at Rocky Mountain High

T he only shop in town with 710 Labs!

Come check out our growing selection and exclusive deals on solventless concentrates.

PAX Era

LIVE RESIN PODS 2 for $70+tax | 4 for $99+tax

FRESH

Colorado's Connoisseur Grade Premium Flower Line

RockyMountainHighDurango 120E.36thStDurango,CO. Open7Days|8am-10pm| (970)259-4093

���������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������� Thursday, January 30, 2020 | 11

»» Get

ready to roll in this year’s Rockin’ Snowdown

By Nick Gonzales HERALD STAFF WRITER

S

nowdown is here, and if you’re like us, you’re ready – you’re ready for this. You’ve been hanging on the edge of your seat. Down to Main Avenue you’re going to zip, as the light parade rolls down the street.

Durango’s original “cabin fever reliever” is back for the 42nd year and “live in costume.” This year’s theme is “A Rockin’ Snowdown,” so break out whatever duds you’ve got that celebrate the 70-year-old musical genre.

SNOWDOWN SURVIVAL GUIDE »» Teams battle it out during the 2019 Snowdown Quaffing Tournament on Saturday at 11th Street Station. One team member slides a mug of beer down the table to another teammate who has to catch it as it slides off the table and then has to drink it.

But take it easy, too. Don’t let the sound of downtown revelry drive you crazy.

“We see a lot of one-event wonders out there who go and put it all on the line for that one event,” says Snowdown spokesman Dave Imming. “And then they don’t experience any of the other 161 events.”

Anyone who says Snowdown isn’t a drinking festival is being at least a bit disingenuous. Even when they aren’t specifically based around alcohol consumption, several dozen events take are centered around Durango’s bar scene.

Then again, Snowdown has certainly mellowed out over the past four decades – past events may have had revelers jumping into pools of beer in various states of undress. These days it includes a plethora of family friendly events denoted by the “Healthy Event Seal of Approval” in the official schedule. There are also events that subvert the drinking theme, such as this year’s Mock and Roll event. The non-alcoholic pub crawl sponsored by Young People in Recovery begins at the Strater Hotel at 5:30 p.m. Thursday and takes participants to various venues featuring mocktail menus.

Even this year’s Snowdown beer was crafted with relative sobriety in mind.

Ska Brewing Co.’s Tutti Frutti Oh Rudie is a fruited India pale ale based in SKA’s Rudie Session IPA. The difference between the ale and its forebear, the “tutti frutti,” comes from hints of mango and passionfruit.

The beer also has a notably low ABV for an IPA at 5%.

“It’s a really nice IPA and at 5%, it’s not too overpowering, especially for Snowdown, when you tend to drink more than one beer in a row,” said Kristen Muraro, Ska’s Sales and Marketing Director.

The beer can be found at Ska’s Headquarters in Bodo Park as well as liquor stores around Durango.

The company plans to run out of the brew by or during Snowdown – if you see it anywhere, know that there is a finite supply.

Jerry McBride/BCI Media file

12 | Thursday, January 30, 2020 ••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

���������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������� Thursday, January 30, 2020 | 13

I Want It All According to Imming, the most essential tool for maximizing your Snowdown experience is the official schedule.

“Get it, mark it with the things you want to do, keep it in your pocket,” he advises.

Muraro agrees.

“There’s so many things going on, you can’t possibly remember them all,” she says.

She also advises having a warm costume change on hand.

“I remember some years when, at the parade, it was like 10 degrees, freezing.”

Speaking of costumes, if you slacked off and didn’t prepare one in advance, there are a number of places around town to find something spandex or animal print to rock. A good starting place would be Animas Trading Co., which always stocks Snowdown costume accessories.

Wondering which events to check out? Out of all the events, there are four that stand out every year – the Four Horsemen of the Snowdowncalypse if you will: The Follies, Fashion Do’s and Don’ts, the Outlaw Josie Pete Golf Tournament, and the Light Parade.

By the time you read this, if you don’t have tickets to the Follies or Fashion Do’s and Don’ts, it’s probably a lost cause. Both began selling long before Snowdown started and at this point you’ll need to sell your soul to get into the Follies. If you’re dead set on seeing them, you can catch a live videocast of it at the Animas City Theatre.

The golf tournament begins at noon on Saturday and has holes all over

town. Entry is $75 for a team of four people, and you supply your own putters and golf balls. If you don’t want to go through the hassle of actually competing, you can spectate from any of the holes.

There’s only so much that can be said about the light parade on Friday at dusk (think 6 p.m.-ish). It’s easily the largest parade in Durango, if not the best-attended single event in Durango, and the only parade held at night. Durangoans pour their creativity into the floats and it is truly spectacular.

If you’re planning on going (and if you’re not, what’s wrong with you?), don’t drive if at all possible. City buses, including the Trolley, will be free all day long on every route. The last ones leave the Transit Center at 8:30 p.m.

From 3 to 9 p.m., there will be two special shuttles ferrying people to and from the Transit Center, the La Plata County Fairgrounds, and Three Springs and Mercy Hospital. The Fairgrounds shuttle will leave once every 20 minutes; the Three Springs one, once every 45 minutes.

(Keep in mind that in addition to alleviating the parking nightmare that is Downtown Durango, these buses can deliver weary day-drinkers home, assuming you live in town and don’t plan to stay out very late. If you’re going to rock a low-level buzz all day Friday, please take the bus.)

Outside of the big four, there are a number of perennial favorite events returning this year.

Thursday features the Hot Wing Eating Contest at Animas City Theatre, the Rockin’ Rollin’ Oyster Slurpin’ Contest at Highway 3 Roadhouse, the Rocky Mountain Oyster Eat

Jerry McBride/BCI Media file

»» Dillon Lindborg dips his beard in beer then squeezes it into another bowl as part of the absorbancy contest at the 2019 Snowdown Beard Growing Competition at Carver Brewing Co.

Jerry McBride/BCI Media file

Jerry McBride/BCI Media file

»» 02-01-2019- Durango- Samba Galactica in the Snowdown Light Parade on Friday on Main Avenue.

»» Evan Vitale, of Team Caped Crusaders, plays a hole at the Palace Restaurant during the 2019 Snowdown Outlaw Josie Pete’s Golf Tournament.

14 | Thursday, January 30, 2020 ••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

Off at Derailed Pour House, and the results of the Beard Growing Competition at Carver Brewing Co. (which in addition to length, often features a Nickelodeon Double Dare-style absorbency challenge – people have been known to drink the beer squeezed out of beards, says Carver’s Head Brewer Patrick Jose).

Friday has the Service Industry Scramble (which is a fantastic spectator sport even if you don’t compete) in the alley behind Steamworks Brewing Co. and the Bed Races between 7th and 8th streets on Main Avenue.

Saturday brings the Chili Cook-Off and Bloody Mary Contest at the Fairgrounds, the Canine fashion Show at McDonald’s, Outhouse Stuffing at Gazpacho Restaurant, and the Quaffing Competition at 11th Street Station.

When it comes to the events added this year, Imming recommends Rock Stop and Roll on Wednesday at Durango High School. The DHS Orchestra will play a rockin’ concert followed by a dinner and children’s costume contest.

We’re also interested in the Drink Up Relay on Friday at Fired Up Pizzeria.

Break on Through (to the Other Side) If, despite our warnings, you wake up with that telltale headache, nausea, and light sensitivity after hitting Durango a bit too hard, Jose has a whole regimen for “slaying the hangover beast,” but wants everyone to remember he’s a brewer, not a doctor: “Take a variety of vitamins alongside 400 to 600 mg of ibuprofen. Chase that with a liter of alkaline water, followed by a deluxe bloody and breakfast at Carver’s.

Nick Gonzales/DGO

»» This year’s Snowdown beer from Ska Brewing Co. is Tutti Frutti Oh Rudie. It’s a low-ABV fruited IPA.

You can always add a touch of edibles or flower to this prescription for a smooth exit from the fog.”

(We’d like to add that there are also dozens of other breakfast spots to help ease your hangover woes. They’ll all, including Craver’s be full of people, but they’re there.)

Muraro adds that staying hydrated and possibly sleeping between events may help you last until the end of the weekend.

When it comes to surviving the festival in a literal sense, there are a number of things you can do to make sure this Snowdown isn’t your last.

Members of Durango’s medical com-

Jerry McBride/BCI Media file

»» Josh Hickens feel the pain of the extra hot wings during the 2018 Snowdown “Hot Wing Eating Contest” at Cuckoo’s Chicken House.

munity wouldn’t speak to us on the record – they’re reluctant to publicly associate themselves with events in which participants have a penchant for overindulging – but they sent over some tips.

They want to encourage a “sober-curious” festival and encourage people to tryout the aforementioned mocktails, especially if they’re in recovery. The medical community also wanted us to remind you that binge drinking – having 5 drinks for men or 4 drinks for women within a two-hour period – can result in alcohol poisoning, injuries, pregnancy, sexually transmitted diseases, heart disease, cancer, brain damage and death. Young People In Recovery and the Animas Alano Club are resources for people who need support in preventing high-risk behaviors. Alcohol can also interact with medications such as antidepressants, anti-anxiety pills and mood-stabilizers.

If you or someone else is in crisis, the 24/7 Axis Care Connect Line is (970) 247-5245.

San Juan Basin Public Health also expressed that it’d be a good idea to get your flu shots at least a couple weeks before Snowdown. Hopefully you did that.

La Plata County Search and Rescue hosts a pancake breakfast and silent auction from 7 a.m. to noon on Sunday.

Outside of sleeping in, we can’t think of a better way to end Snowdown – especially if you’re a sports fan and heading straight into a Super Bowl watch party.

���������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������� Thursday, January 30, 2020 | 15

[weed]

Lazercat Live Rosin Lava will free your mind And the hunger pangs will follow We need to discuss something serious, you guys: cartoons. Have you ever gotten stoned and watched “Over the Garden Wall,” that cartoon miniseries that ran on Cartoon Network in 2014? Yes, that is a very specific question, but I feel it’s important nonetheless.

Why do I fee it’s important, you ask? Well, because I got stoned and watched “Over the Garden While” with the help of some Lazercat Live Rosin Lava — the Turbo Amethyst strain, to be exact — and in that moment I I didn’t care though. This stuff tasted great, despite knew I was living my best life. I just want you guys to do making my throat seize up and go numb with one hit. the same.

I continued to indulge until I could feel that old familiar tingling run down my arms and into my head. And, If you aren’t into cartoons, well, go away cause this review ain’t for you. (Kidding. I’m kidding. You can stay.) once I was blissfully high, I flipped on “Over the Garden Wall” and let that weird ass cartoon take me away.

If you are into cartoons, you should go get yourself some Lazercat Turbo Amethyst lava, cause it will make I don’t know if y’all are familiar with that miniseries, all your cartoon experiences that much better. but it’s basically the strangest, best thing I’ve ever watched. It was even better while stoned on Turbo I picked up a gram of this fancy extract from ProhiAmethyst, though, because that indica-driven high bition Herb, which is currently carrying four different convinced me that I totally understood the journey of strains of the stuff. I chose the indica-dominant Turbo these two lost kids who do a bunch of weird crap and Amethyst for the name, obviously, and it was a pretty carry around a frog. I was one with the cartoon. badass choice, if I do say so myself. I popped the lid off the tiny jar and was impressed with how crystal clear After spending a bunch of time in nirvana with Wirt the pale yellow concentrate was. It sat in the bottom of and Greg, my cartoon heroes, I realized was also freakthe jar like a thin layer of yellow jelly, and I was almost ing starving. Luckily I had prepared for this epic journey too mesmerized by its looks to ruin it with the dab pen. with a ton of chocolate-covered gummy bears, which I’d ALMOST. Once I stuck my nose in it and caught a

call on my part, because I was entirely too couchlocked and mesmerized to get up for snacks. In fact, I’m pretty sure I’d convinced myself at that point that I was part of the cartoon and was talking to a girl-turnedbluebird alongside my animated pals.

whiff of the pungent pine forest within I couldn’t help myself: I had to try it out. One hit in and I knew this was something special. And by that I mean I choked like I had never choked before, to the point where my housemate came to make sure I was still alive. Once they confirmed that it was just the weed and not some weird bout of undiagnosed asthma, they proceeded to laugh at me — to my face ­— for entirely too long.

Details

Where to find LazerI must have passed out cat Live Rosin Lava: Prohibition Herb, 1185 Cami- at some point because no del Rio, prohibitionherb.

I woke up a few hours com later in a puddle of drool with an empty bag beside me, but I didn’t care. I felt refreshed from my weird cartoon journey. No ragrets?

So, if you haven’t watched “Over the Garden Wall,” I highly recommend you remedy that issue. And if you haven’t smoked any of the Lazercat rosin, I recommend you do so while watching said miniseries. Let your mind be free, your dab pen be full of fancy rosin, and let your belly be full of gummy bears. It’s the only way to live.

stashed next to my bed prior to smoking. It was a good

—— DGO Pufnstuf

[snowdown 2020] From Page 10

Live at both: Henry Strater Theater - 699 Main and Durango Arts Center Theater - 802 E 2nd

Rotary Clubs & Alpine Bank - 1099 Main Rolling of giant red exercise balls down from 2nd

The SNOWDOWN Follies return for the 37th year of entertainment with your favorite showbiz personal-

Avenue and 10th Street to win $5000, $2000, and

ities and local commentary! This notorious irreverent

$1000 while supporting local non-profits.

review performs in two different theaters simultane-

6 PM (DUSK) SNOWDOWN LIGHT PARADE Main from College Dr to 12th St Hosted by Purgatory Resort, Durango’s only nighttime parade, where Rock and Roll light up floats create

ously, Really! Cash bar!

7:30 PM SNOWDOWN FOLLIES VIDEOCAST Animas City Theatre - 128 E College Dr If you missed getting tickets for the Snowdown Fol-

a dazzling delight. Floats compete for trophies in 10

lies, watch the show on the big screen at the Animas

divisions with special emphasis on lights and theme.

City Theatre! It’s almost as good as the real thing-at

7 PM 2ND ANNUAL SNOWDOWN COSTUME

half the price! Must be 21+.

BALL, POST PARADE AWARDS & BALLOON DROP! Durango Balloon Company - 835 Main (Main Mall) Back for its 2nd year, the Durango Balloon SNOWDOWN Costume Ball, Balloon Drop, and Post Parade Awards Ceremony is not to be missed!

7:30 PM SKI SCHOOL VS. SKI PATROL SNOWDOWN SOFTBALL GAME FLC Softball Complex - Fort Lewis College A SNOWDOWN tradition! Purgatory Mountain Patrol and the Ski/Snowboard School, continue their 42nd year rivalry in Ski Softball- Softball played on skis and boards!

7:30 PM SNOWDOWN FOLLIES

9 PM ROCK AND ROLL LIVE MUSIC TRIVIA Derailed Pour House - 725 Main Play along with the rock and roll music of AOR live from Albuquerque! Guess the songs they rock out for you and win cash $$ prizes and a smarty pants music trophy!! Must be 21+.

9:30 PM NO PANTS SNOWPANTS DANCE Starlight Lounge - 937 Main It’s time we stop! Hey, what’s that sound…

Everybody look! What’s going down? Pants!!! Wear anything but pants dance...SNOWDOWN theme! Must be 21+.

Continued on Page 18

16 | Thursday, January 30, 2020 ••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

[weed]

Go smoke some Axilla and impress your friends with your smarts The other night I went on a prolonged rant about how credit scores are ridiculous and intriguing and frustrating and I am still a little embarrassed about it. I’m going to blame it on the Axilla I smoked, courtesy of The Green House in Durango.

I won’t replay the nerded out personal finance rant for you in this review, but I will tell you this: anything that tricks me into thinking that numbers are fun is the devil. The fun devil, but the devil nonetheless.

Here’s the deal. I suck at math. Numbers piss me off, they are not fun, so I don’t know WHERE the hell that rant came from, but it was inside me and Axilla unleashed it. I guess that should be expected from a strain that leans heavily toward the indica properties, but still.

Anyway, it all started when I lit up a bowl of Axilla’s dense little nugs.

The bowl smelled a bit like a sour pine forest, which makes no sense but let’s just roll with it. The buds did not taste like sour pine, though. They tasted like, well, weed.

The effects, on the other hand, were not like your typical weed strain at all.

They were as confusing and glorious as that sour pine smell. The first thing I felt was high. My arms started to feel like they were covered in tiny fun pin pricks that ran up and down my limbs at will. The second thing I felt was like I needed to cough, deeply and obnoxiously, and it lasted for entirely too long of a stint.

Shortly after I lost one of my lungs to the war that is Axilla I started to feel the high even more, which was about 10 times more evident than it had been before the coughing fit. Everything was funny, from the dog scratching itself to the random one-liners I’d catch from Quagmire and Family Guy, which was blaring in the background. Once that subsided, I felt like the smartest person on earth. So smart, in fact, that I felt it necessary to trap one of my housemates and tell them everything I knew about credit scores and why they are important.

Here’s the gist: I vaguely remember feeling like I wanted to talk about personal finance, probably because I’d

Details

Where to find Axilla: The Green House, 730 S. Camino del Rio, thegreenhousecolorado.com/ read a story on how the FICO scores are going to be changing again and feeling like it was total crap. I have an even foggier memory of subsequently telling them that it’s complete and utter bullshit and completely classist to change up the rules of the credit score game out of nowhere. So, take note, FICO overlords. I’m watching you, I guess.

I also remember them looking at me like I am insane, which I guess is fair considering I don’t normally care about the credit score rules, but I was VERY PASSIONATE about it this day. And then I remember nothing.

Well, nothing other than waking up and feeling like I’d slept for a thousand years. I must have, at some point, IN THE MIDDLE OF MY RANT, fallen asleep only to dream of nothing, credit scores included. I felt refreshed as hell, and like I’d slept for a thousand years.

So yeah. Axilla is one of a kind. It made me care about shit I wouldn’t normally care about and then pass out like I’d eaten 400 sleeping pills. In other words, it was awesome. You should get yourself some of this strain, smoke it, and then impress your friends by completely bullshitting information about personal finance. They’ll love you for it. And if they don’t, at least you won’t remember.

—— DGO Pufnstuf

���������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������� Thursday, January 30, 2020 | 17

[snowdown 2020] From Page 16 10 PM POLE DANCING CONTEST Wild Horse Saloon - 601 E 2nd Ave Always a crowd pleaser, men and women get the chance to grab a pole and show off their best moves.

Contestants and spectators should arrive early as this event fills up fast! Bar tabs will be awarded as prizes.

Live video on the big screen. Must be 21+.

10 PM SNOWDOWN FOLLIES - SECOND FRIDAY PERFORMANCE Live at both: Henry Strater Theater - 699 Main and Durango Arts Center Theater - 802 E 2nd Ave 10 PM SNOWDOWN FOLLIES VIDEOCAST

great entertainment! Must be 18+.

10 AM KIDS SNOW GAMES

SATURDAY 8 AM SNOWDOWN BALLOON RALLY & MASS ASCENSION HWY 550 N, N side of Hermosa Meadows Rd (Park at Animas Valley Elem. School) This spectacular event features a beautiful display of colorful hot air balloons ascending in the early morning frost.

Hosted by McDonald’s. Crazy fun games for your littlest ones! This super silly SNOWDOWN event is

Durango Community Recreation Center - 2700 Main Hosted by Durango Parks & Rec. Join in the

to the finish line. Ages 5-18.

to Durango, everyone is playing with the Hula Hoop!”

Come in between NOON & 7 PM and receive 4

Animas River Lounge at the Doubletree - 501

samples of white and red wine. Identify 3 of the 4 samples using our description menu and win a coupon for a FREE glass of wine! Correctly identify all 4 and win a FREE bottle of wine! Must be 21+.

Camino Del Rio Partner up to make your finest french toast - no hands allowed. Try your best to not give french toast a bad name. Must be 21+.

Spin it like a record, baby!

1 PM SNOWDOWN KIDS & TEEN FOLLIES BEST OF SHOW Durango Arts Center Theater - 802 E 2nd Ave 1:15 PM BROOMBALL TOURNAMENT Chapman Hill Ice Rink - 500 Florida Rd

12 NOON - 2 PM SNOWDOWN CHILI COOK-OFF La Plata County Fair Grounds Exhibition Hall 2500 Main

10:30 AM BOMBER BOWLING

“Hula Hoop! Hula Hoop! Anyone can play from 3,

Y(OUR) WINE?

party for kids from 3 years old, up to 5th graders!

RELAY

Gazpacho Restaurant - 431 E 2nd Ave

to 110! From Bayfield, to Purgatory, from Gem Village

Four Leaves Winery - 528 Main

10 AM MAKE YOUR OWN FRENCH TOAST

1 PM HULA HOOP CONTEST

NOON - 7 PM HOW WELL DO YOU KNOW

filled with something for every little rock star! This is a

Make sure you’re ready to chow down on some

If you come from the streets like me, put your brooms up!

If you rep your city like me, put your brooms up!

If you put in work like me, put your brooms up!

Rocky Mountain High - 120 E 36th St

delicious red and green chili, salsa and vegetarian chili.

Coed single-elimination 6-on-6 tournament! “Of-

In teams of 2-4 people, one person on snow

Brews and soft drinks will be available for those of you

ficial Broomball” equipment is required. Bring or ride

who have the burnin’ love of chili that hurts so good!

your own wood handled straw broom and protective

equipment will be jettisoned via team power towards bowling pins, traffic cones, on the other side of the RMH Parking lot. Teams will be given points according to how many pins are knocked down, with two top teams receiving prizes!

gear with non-abrasive shoe soles. Teams must provide 12 NOON - 2 PM SNOWDOWN BLOODY

their own helmets. Complete rosters are due when

MARY CONTEST

payment is made. NO ALCOHOL! Citations will be

LA Plata County Fairgrounds Exhibition Hall - 2500 Main

11 AM PBS KIDS SATURDAY MORNING CARTOONS La Plata County Fairgrounds Admin Building - 2500

9 AM 3-ON-3 BASKETBALL TOURNAMENT

under, crossed, or otherwise negotiated to get through

Folsum Park - 11 Folsum Place (off Florida Rd)

Animas City Theatre - 128 E College Dr (see FRIDAY 7:30 PM for details)

which participants riff obstacles to be climbed, crawled

Main Rocky Mountain PBS will host a screening of excit-

Those who lay claim they rock the best Bloody Mary’s like a hurricane…bring it on! The Bloody Mary Contest takes place during the SNOWDOWN Chili Cook-Off. Vodka, cups and ice, ice baby will be provided. Contestants bring the rest to prepare their Bloody

ing be-bop content from PBS Kids that children and

Mary’s and decorate their booth AND themselves.

given to violators. Awards ceremony following the tournament. Must be 18+.

1:30 PM LIMBO HOW LOW CAN YOU GO Gaspacho Restaurant - 431 E 2nd Ave Hosted by Lou’s Bed & Breakfast. Rock those Apple Bottom jeans, with the fur, don’t hit the floor and get low, low, low, low, low, low, low, low!

families can enjoy before the chili cook-off. Volunteers

Costumes are encouraged! Each team will receive ½

1:30 PM ROOTS TO RANCHES SCREENING

SNOWDOWN celebration by playing 3-on-3 basket-

will be involved to make this a fun and engaging, family

of a table to decorate, then prepare and serve Bloody

AND PANEL: “A CELEBRATION OF RANCH-

ball! This tournament is for kids in grades 3rd through

friendly event!

Mary’s from NOON until 2 PM. Rules and registration

ING, HUNTING, AND FORAGING IN OUR

can be found at www.SNOWDOWN.org.

REGIONAL FOOD CULTURE”

12th. 8 Divisions, maximum 4 players per team. Teams are guaranteed a minimum of 4 games and event

11 AM BRING YOUR PARTNER FOOSBALL

T-shirt with registration. Volunteer referees and

The Garage - 121 W 8th St

scorekeepers needed.

The smashing, crashing foosball competition

Event Coordinator: Jordan Rupe 375-7331 Entry Cost: $50 per team/early reg.; $75 per team/ late reg.

Event Deadline: Registration begins Wednesday Jan 29 Prizes: 1st & 2nd prizes awarded for girls and boys in each age division

returns again this year! Bring your own partner in

DOWN SHOWDOWN JR. The Garage - 121 W 8th St Did you know that Slash of Gun’s and Roses loves his collection of pinball machines? Rock and Roll

American Legion Post 28 - 878 E 2nd Ave Attention all Cornholers! The ever popular corn-

crime. 32 teams will compete in the bar room. Double

hole tournament returns! Try to totally eclipse bean

elimination until the final team can claim, WE ARE THE

bags through the holes in the wooden platform. ACA

CHAMPIONS! Must be 21+.

Rules will govern all scoring and outcomes. 32 teams in

11 AM 9 BALL BILLIARD TOURNAMENT The Garage - 121 W 8th St SNOWDOWNS Golden Oldie-Now in its 24th year!

Double elimination 64 player bracket. Swagalicious

10 AM ROCK AND ROLL PINBALL SNOW-

1 PM CORNHOLE TOURNAMENT

brackets - single elimination. Must be 21+.

1 PM CAT YOGA 1309 E 3rd Ave - Rm #15 Join some of the La Plata County Humane Society’s

T-shirts will be awarded to all participants. Must be

adoptable kitties for a special stray cat strut yoga

21+.

class! All ages and skill levels welcome.

11 AM SNOWDOWN CASTAWAY “FLY FISH-

1 PM CANINE FASHION SHOW

ING CASTING CONTEST” Schneider Park - 9th St and Roosa Ave

McDonald’s Parking Lot - 201 W College Dr Who let the dogs out? Who? Who? Who? We’re

Hosted by the San Juan Angler. Join us in this fun

HOWLING just thinking about this hilarious, family

pinball tournament for junior rock stars to rock their

flycasting contest, where it’s all about precision and

friendly event! Bring your best furry friend, borrow

Pinball Wizard skills!

distance. Whip that rod….whip it real good! Gear will

someone else’s or nothin’ but a hounddog and show off

be provided or you can bring your own. All skill levels

your creativity! Dress alike, theme related and silliest!

Pinball SNOWDOWN Showdown is a fun and exciting

10 AM STRONGMAN & STRONGWOMAN COMPETITION CrossFit Durango - 360 S Camino Del Rio This is a traditional Strongman event, open to all levels of ability. There may be stones, logs, yokes, axle

and spectators welcome.

11:30 AM ROCK THIS WAY Buckley Park - 1200 Main Hosted by Celebrating Healthy Communities

1PM HUMAN FOOSBALL Animas Brewing Co - 1560 E 2nd Ave Hosted by the Southwest Center for Independence.

La Plata County Fairgrounds Admin Building - 2500 Main Once your belly is full of chili and bloody’s, why not stay a while? On Saturday afternoon RMPBS will be hosting a premiere screening of Roots to Ranches, a new cooking show on PBS hosted by Southern-raised, Denver-based chef Elise Wiggens. Directly following the screening there will be a panel discussion celebrating the influences of ranching, hunting, and foraging in home cuisine and local food culture, including information from La Plata County extension and other community partners on how home cooks can turn their hobbies into cottage-food businesses in the Western Slope.

2 - 3 PM SNOWDOWN RC ROCK CRAWL “SCALE” RIGS COMPETITION Kroegers Ace Hardware - 8 Town Plaza 2 PM BATTLE OF THE HANDS TEXT OFF The Mac Ranch - 1063 Main TEXTING rock stars unite! The Mac Ranch is turning it up to 11 with the Battle of the HANDS Text Off where participants will put their texting skills to the test with various challenges including an epic Journey through an obstacle course, blindfolded on the Dark

Get your kicks (not on Route 66) with this hilarious

Side of the Moon, and more. Bring your whole Motley

bars, keg carries and much more that both athletes and

Coalition. Great fun and hilarity for kids, especially

game of Human Foosball! Teams of five swinging play-

Crüe down to The Mac Ranch, along with your smart-

spectators will find exciting. It’s fun, silly, heavy and

if there is snow or mud! A dirty deeds course over

ers 18 and over. This will be a tournament style event.

phones, and you’ll be judged on speed and accuracy, as

18 | Thursday, January 30, 2020 ••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

[snowdown 2020] well as your knowledge of text speak - such as TD2M

Jan 18 for 60 minutes, the remaining tickets will be

- ‘Talk Dirty To Me’ and URA* - ‘You Are a Star.’

available online at animascitytheatre.com until Sold

2 PM OUTHOUSE STUFFING Gazpacho Restaurant - 431 E 2nd Ave You say it’s urgent so urgent, just wait and see how much fun outhouse stuffing can be? How many of your fellow flexible friends can you stuff in an outhouse in 2 minutes! Don’t worry, the outhouse won’t take your breath away and has been specially cleaned for this one-of-a-kind event! Can you stay in there with

Out. Get them before they’re gone!

5 PM SEARCH FOR THE SILVER BULLET AWARD CEREMONY Joel’s Bar - 119 W 8th St 6 PM NINTENDO MARIO KART 64 Starlight Lounge - 937 Main Use those mad gaming skills that you have wasted

the door shut for 10 whole seconds? Amazing lung

hours over the years acquiring (and will never get

capacity will leave you on a high note. Beat the record

back) to drive a pretend go-cart. If you can’t drive 55

and get an atta-boy! Must be 21+.

and have a need for speed, you’re destined to be the survivor. Must be 21+

Have a drink on me and get ready to chug-a-lug!

6:30 PM CARDS AGAINST SNOWDOWN VFW - 1550 Main

Using Ernie’s custom bowling lane tables, enter your

A Cards Against Humanity tournament! Cards

4-person team in 2020’s après ski-style table sliding

Against Humanity is decribed at a party game for

beer extravaganza! See coordinator for rules. Must

horrible people. “It’s as despicable and awkward as

be 21+.

you and your friends.” (That right there makes us want

Event Coordinator: Carmen Drulis 749-7204 Entry Cost: $40 per team Prizes: 1st - $25 Ernie’s Gift card per team member & swag, 2nd - $20 Ernie’s Gift card per team member & swag, 3rd - $15 Ernie’s Gift card per team member & swag 3 - 5 PM SCOUTS ROCK! First Presbyterian Church of Durango - 1159 E

SEX EDUCATION Wednesday, Feb. 5 • 6 p.m.

Durango Public Library

1900 East Third Ave. Local voices. Local stories.

Welcome to Durango Diaries.

3 PM QUAFFING COMPETITION 11th Street Station - 1101 Main

Durango Diaries Season 5

Three sex experts will share stories about questions they encounter about sex: from the light-hearted to the more serious.

Storytellers include:

to be first at the door!) This is sure to be a laugh until your cheeks hurt event! See Coordinator for additional rules. Must be 18+.

7 PM COSTUME CONTEST & DANCE PARTY The Powerhouse - 1333 Camino del Rio Rock out as your favorite musician in this crazy fun costume contest! Boogie down to live music and dress up to win prizes in four categories.

Erin Brandt earned a graduate degree in forensic sexology, launching her positive sexuality education journey. She’s worked at Planned Parenthood, a sex shop, FemSexComm, co-hosted a radio show and is a columnist for DGO Magazine. She has worked with all ages, and brings an enthusiasm and openness to the topic.

3rd Ave Hosted by Scouts BSA Troop 501 - celebrating 82 years in Durango! This is your backstage pass to

7:30 PM SNOWDOWN FOLLIES Live at both: Henry Strater Theater - 699 Main and

FAMILY FUN for all of your groupies! Get the band

Durango Arts Center Theater - 802 E 2nd

together and head outside for a rockin’ winter adven-

7:30 PM SNOWDOWN FOLLIES VIDEO-

ture! The set list includes snow, sleds, skillz, and songs.

CAST

Parents must remain with their children during the event (sorry, no drop-offs). All ages welcome!

Event Coordinator: Kenn Bates 426-2057 Entry Cost: FREE

Animas City Theatre - 128 E College Dr 8 PM LIFE SIZED HUNGRY HIPPOS DoubleTree Ballroom - 501 Camino del Rio Welcome to the Jungle! Think of the game hungry hippos, but you are the hippo (you know you’ve always

4 PM JOSIE PETE’S GOLF TOURNAMENT -

wanted to be one!) Grab up to 99 balloons while your

AWARD PARTY

teammate sends you into the pile and pulls you back

Durango Elks Lodge - 901 E 2nd Ave 4 - 6 PM FAMILY SOCK HOP First Presbyterian Church 1159 E 3rd Ave Family friendly “Sock Hop”! A dance party for your

out on a scooter. Must be 21+.

8 PM GUINNESS GAMES - YAHTZEE!

Yahtzee - “The Fun Game That Makes Thinking Fun!” You need to roll the dice cause this is your one

no more! (Well, until 6 PM anyway) All ages welcome!

true sacrifice. It never gets old! Players compete

DON’TS VIDEOCAST

individually or on teams of 4 in case of a large turnout.

Fashion Luncheon? Do you work on Wednesday and always miss out on the fun? Come see the Fashion

8:30 PM BOOTY SHAKING CONTEST

TM

Presented By:

In Partnership with:

Wild Horse Saloon - 601 E 2nd Ave One on one shake, shake, shake your booty dance showdown. Bracket stye tournament where the best

ready seen it but as they say, our old news is your new

at moving their booty round, round like a record baby

news! As an added bonus, some of the runway models

takes it all

Animas City Theatre box office at NOON on Saturday

Diaries

Must be 21+.

Show Replay on the big screen! The rest of us have al-

may make an appearance! Tickets will go on sale at the

Durang

Be on time and be ready to play! No sign up required.

Animas City Theatre - 128 E College Dr Didn’t get tickets to SNOWDOWN’S Premier

Maia Bomar is a senior at Fort Lewis College majoring in public health and minoring in gender and sexuality studies. She is the president of the Feminist Voice Club on campus and the coordinator of Horny the Sex Box, FLC’s sex-positive, anonymous sex-education program.

The Irish Embassy Pub - 900 Main

whole family! Boogie woogie til you just can’t boogie

4 PM SNOWDOWN FASHION DO’S &

Liane Jollon joined San Juan Basin Public Health as a registered nurse in 2010 and was named the executive director of SJBPH in 2013. Having started her public health career in SJBPH’s sexual health clinic, she believes that sexual health is an integral component of overall health and wellness.

FREE. Kid-friendly. For more information visit durangoherald.com/durangodiaries

Continued on Page 23

���������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������� Thursday, January 30, 2020 | 19

20 20 J O I N

U S

F O R

T H E

AWA R D S C E R E M O N Y & M AG A Z I N E U N V E I L I N G

Thursday, March 12, 2020 5:30 to 8 p.m.

W O N E L A S N O S T TICKE 11.00 $

Powerhouse Science Center

An uplifting cocktail party with light fare, cash bar, and celebration of exceptional women in La Plata and Montezuma counties!

Event Sponsor

Tickets ordered over the phone are $ 11.00. Please call 970-403-1965

Help Wanted/Full Time

Customer Service Representative (Durango, CO): BCI is hiring a full-time Customer Service Representative!

Schedule: Tuesday - Saturday.

Requirements: Excellent customer services skills, and 1+ year(s) experience in an office setting. Please apply at: https:// ballantinecommunicationsinc. com/careers

Hiring Shift Supervisors & Crew Work at Wendy’s where you can get a portion of your pay the day after working. We offer flexible schedules, free meals, and many benefits, including college scholarships and partnerships and insurance benefits. Apply today by Texting WCS to 242424 or apply online at nowhiring. com/WCS

Help Wanted/Full Time

Outside Digital Sales Representative: BCI is hiring!

The likely candidate will have a solid understanding of all our digital-marketing products or services offered by the company and how these services meet the client’s needs. Responsibilities will be focused on outside sales approximately 90% of the time. If you are self-driven, able to work independently, and have proven ability to sell digital media products and services—we’re looking for someone like you to join the BCI team! Required: Bachelor’s degree in Business or related field, and 3+ years proven ability in digital sales. Apply at: https:// ballantinecommunicationsinc. com/careers

Sell it here - Find it here DGO Classifieds Call 970-247-3504 for more information

Furniture & HH Goods Durango Furniture Clearance Center Matt Sets Used $89; Rebuilt $169.

Chest Used $79; New $169.

Sofas Used $79; New $349 Dinette used $99.

Mon thru Sat, 10am-5pm, closed Sun. 1474 Main Ave 970-259-1135

Miscellaneous for Sale

Automobiles for Sale

GUARANTEED Credit Approval!

4x4 Auto Sales 970-385-7940 21698 Hwy 160 West

Rentals

Crossroads Bldg prof office 2 rooms, 338sf Main Ave & 11th St, #106. Wifi avail. AC/Heat, kitch, br w/ shower, copy rm, conf rm. 1 yr min $645mo, $500 dep. 970-769-7432, 760-625-9475.

New Year Special!

8x12 starting at $1850 • 10x12 starting at $2400. All sheds built on site to fit your needs!! No tax or delivery fee. 970-317-4999 ironwoodoutbuildings.com Hurry and beat the snow!

CARRY DGO IN YOUR BUSINESS Call 375-4570 or email info@dgomag.com

Various offices/retail at various locations. 120 sf - 4700 sf from $325/ mo - $4400/mo. Ample parking. Call for more info 970-259-2034.

Various rentals available.

Action Property Management (970) 382-0134 durangorealestate rentals.com

follow, like, tweet us... dgoma g /dgomag @dgo_mag ���������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������� Thursday, January 30, 2020 | 21

[love and sex]

How to have naked sex outside when it’s freakin’ cold In an attempt to celebrate winter, as it is winter for the majority of my readers, I’m going to reprise one of my popular columns – a handy guide to sex in the great outdoors. Instead of naked frolicking in summer fields of wildflowers, I’ll be focusing on how to navigate sex when it’s cold outside. It is important to note that cold weather is not the same everywhere. A gentle reminder to folks that temperatures below freezing can harm your body (hypothermia and frostbite) so pay attention to the temperature. Losing a body part to frostbite might seem like the start of a kick ass story (not really) until that body part is connected to your genitals. Don’t be dumb; be smart and sexy!

Embracing cold weather means learning how to navigate through it comfortably – lots of warm layers, appropriate footwear, emergency supplies in your vehicle, and an appreciation for Mother Nature’s desire to wallop us with surprises. I know none of this sounds particularly sexy. Winter is often about survival while being surrounded by death or at least the hibernation of life. So how do we turn all those layers and that survival energy into a sexual romp in the snow?! With an open mind, some preparation, and a sense of sexy fun.

Be a (boy) scout Winter weather is serious business and the following is something you should be doing regardless of whether or not there will be sexy romping. Be prepared. Make sure you have warm blankets, a first aid kit, water, snacks, boots, a shovel, warm layers, toilet paper, flashlight, a good knife, rescue tool (it cuts through seatbelts and can break a car window), ice scraper, and emergency cash. For most of us, we would store these items in our vehicle and rotate food and water out every 6 months and update the first aid kit and batteries as needed.

If you are venturing outdoors in the winter, for example skiing at a resort or in the backcountry, you would be bringing smaller versions of some of those items in a backpack. A ski resort may not feel like you need to pack a serious safety kit but many resorts don’t have cell service and if you end up off trail and lost, you’ll be happy to have a way to take care of yourself. Also, best practice is to tell someone where you will be and for how long, then they’ll be able to call for help on your behalf.

The additional items you’ll need if your outdoor adventure is going to include sex are condoms and/or dental dams, a warm blanket or sleeping bag, a thermos with a warm drink, lube, body wipes for clean up, and that sense of sexy fun I mentioned earlier. You can stash the lube and body wipes in your car and they should be fine over time. Condoms and dental dams don’t do well in cold temperatures so don’t pack them until you know you will use them.

Reminder: Condoms and dentals dams help with clean up. They also protect from STIs. Yay! Think outside the hot tub Hot tub sex is fine. Even if it does tend to give vagina

all of your favorite foods.

Use all the layers you have on to do a tortuous strip tease – do it indoors after a day of adventuring or just coming home from work in a storm.

A make out session while ice skating might tick all the boxes – and it’s also ideal when it is way too cold to expose your genitals!

Brigitte Tohm/Pexels

Don’t forget . . .

owners yeast infections because the treated water messes with the vagina’s pH. Some tips for hot tub sex, if you are determined to have it:

. . .if you are naked outdoors the law will frown on that and you may face serious consequences – up to and including fines, jail time, and a sexual offender label.

1. A silicone based lube is your friend because it doesn’t wash away as quickly.

Be informed about your state, county, and city laws.

Take a moment to think about these consequences and then make a decision about finding a private space where being naked isn’t going to break the law. Finally, make sure that your lovers are consenting to the outdoor sex-capade and have all this information too.

2. If you are planning on penetrative sex, insert outside the water and then get in.

3. This is an opportunity for non-pump and thrust sex because pump and thrust will force water into the rectum or vagina.

4. Or try out some mutual masturbation or a good make out session, instead.

If you want to skip the hot tub, try some outdoor activities. Go snowshoeing and find a sturdy tree to have sex standing up! Do the same while skiing but unclip from your skis first. Yes, there is a story here: Once upon a time, a couple pulled over in the trees at a ski resort and proceeded to get their groove on. Unfortunately, they didn’t think it through and remained clipped into their skis. Their naked selves began sliding down the hill, out of the trees, in full view of strangers, and ended up crashing into another set of trees. Moral of the story: Don’t have sex with your skis on.

Other winter activities worth exploring for potential sexy fun: Polar bear plunge – some are done in the nude and can really get the blood pumping.

Visit a natural hot springs – Colorado is lousy with hot springs and sometimes you can book a private tub or visit one of the bathing suit optional springs.

Have a snowball fight, go sledding, make snow angels – letting go of your adult brain for a bit and just have fun.

Stay indoors – light a fire, and have a picnic with

Too cold?

I am a big fan of vacations during the winter months.

After the holiday rush in December, I look at booking a getaway to warmer climes anytime from January through March. Forget layers! Get into your bathing suit (or not) and dip into some bath-water-warm ocean water!

If you’ve been enjoying my columns, I encourage you to join me at a workshop. I spend more time on these important and fun topics and you will walk away with actionable steps you can take for your sex life.

Next Thursday, February 6th, I’ll be facilitating a workshop on self-pleasure – better known as masturbation!

In the workshop we’ll be focusing on why you should have a masturbation practice. Every workshop includes opportunities to ask questions anonymously on any topic. We set group guidelines before we start and I work to maintain a safe and supportive learning space. Visit my website for the link to purchase tickets and learn more about this and future workshops for adults!

Erin Brandt (she/her/hers) has been a sexologist for 15 years. When she’s not spreading sexual knowledge, Erin can be found learning from her child, hiking with her partner, cuddling with her pitbull, knitting with her cat, dancing with friends, and searching for the nearest hammock and ocean breeze. Want more? Visit www.positivesexed.com.

22 | Thursday, January 30, 2020 ••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

Horoscope ARIES (March 21 to April 19)

This is a tricky couple of weeks. You are empowered because the Moon is in your sign; nevertheless, it’s a poor time for important decisions or shopping. Be aware of this. Restrict your spending to food, gas, or entertainment.

TAURUS (April 20 to May 20)

You might appear indecisive to others, especially bosses. Ideally, agree to nothing important during this time and don’t volunteer for anything. It’s a bad time for financial decisions as well.

LEO (July 23 to Aug. 22) Even though you want to do something different today, keep it low-key. Restrict your spending to food, gas, and entertainment. Enjoy the company of someone “different.”

From Page 19 9 PM BEST CHEST IN THE WEST Starlight Lounges - 937 Main Guys and gals!! If you’re chest-worthy and want to ‘rack’ up some prizes, hit us with your best shot and show us what you’ve got! Must be 21+.

10 PM SNOWDOWN FOLLIES - SECOND SATURDAY PERFORMANCE Live at both: Henry Strater Theater - 699 Main and Durango Arts Center Theater - 802 E 2nd

restrict purchases to food, gas, and entertainment.

SCORPIO (Oct. 23 to Nov. 21)

PISCES (Feb. 19 to March 20)

This is a poor time to make decisions at work or related to your health. Just coast and keep things simple.

You are focused on money and perhaps even shopping right now. Not wise.

Restrict your spending to food, gas, and SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22 to Dec. 21) entertainment right now. This is a poor time to initiate new decisions or spend This is a highly creative time for you! money – definitely.

Write down your original ideas. Enjoy BORN DURING THESE TWO schmoozing with friends, but restrict spending to food, gas and entertainment. WEEKS You are multitalented, motivated and alert.

At times, you appear eccentric. You love the Home, family, and your private life are challenge of juggling several jobs. This year your priority right now. In fact, you will want to cocoon at home. But do not shop you’re wrapping up many things you began nine years ago by letting go of what is no for your home – only buy food and gas. longer relevant and moving on to someAQUARIUS (Jan. 20 to Feb. 18) thing new and different. You are lightening your load to get ready for new beginnings!

It’s easy for your mind to think outside the box right now. This is a great day for a short trip. However, if spending money, (c) 2019 King Features Syndicate, Inc. CAPRICORN (Dec. 22 to Jan. 19)

Bizarro

Relations with bosses and authority figures are great. However, this is a poor time to volunteer for anything or to try to make a great impression on your boss. Keep your VIRGO (Aug. 23 to Sept. 22) Be careful during this time because you head down and your powder dry. might be interested in financial matters, GEMINI (May 21 to June 20) debt, and shared property. However, This is an excellent time for a heart-tothis is a poor time for financial decisions.

Don’t even shop. heart discussion with a female friend because people are ready to let their hair LIBRA (Sept. 23 to Oct. 22) down and be honest. Nevertheless, don’t Don’t agree to anything important when agree to anything important. Just talk. talking to partners or close friends right CANCER (June 21 to July 22) now. When it comes to spending money,

confine your spending to gas, food, and entertainment.

10 PM SNOWDOWN FOLLIES VIDEOCAST Animas City Theatre - 128 E College Dr 10 PM KARAOKE CONTEST 8TH Avenue Tavern - 509 E 8TH Ave 11 PM ROCK AND ROLL COSTUME GALA Derailed Pour House - 725 Main If all you wanna do is dance…come show off your rockin’

Animas Valley Elem. School) 9 AM 3-ON-3 BASKETBALL TOURNAMENT Durango Recreation Center - 2700 Main 10 AM SNOWDOWN TRUCK PULL Illete Fitness - 659 Tech Center Dr Truck Yeah! Teams and Individuals will compete to pull a

costumes and your best dance moves! Best couple and best solo

truck, hand over hand, 100 feet! Prizes will be awarded for

categories.

fastest male, female and team. Must be 18+.

SUNDAY

11 AM 8 BALL BILLIARDS TOURNAMENT

7 AM - 12 NOON LA PLATA COUNTY SEARCH AND RESCUE PANCAKE BREAKFAST & SILENT AUCTION La Plata County Fairgrounds Exhibit Hall - 2500 Main Hosted by La Plata County Search and Rescue. Support Search & Rescue! All you can eat pancakes, ham, eggs, coffee and juice! Come to our breakfast and we’ll come to your rescue!

8 AM SNOWDOWN BALLOON RALLY & MASS ASCENSION HWY 550 N, N Side of Hermosa Meadows Rd (Park at

The Garage - 121 W 8th St Now in its 2th year! Double elimination tournament with up to 64 players. Pick your own music on our Jukebox and rock into the afternoon. Must be 21+.

12:30 PM TEXAS HOLD EM POKER TOURNAMENT Starlight Lounge - 937 Main Ave Every gambler knows Poker! “You got to know when to hold’em, know when to fold’em, Know when to walk away and know when to run.” Must be 21+.

���������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������� Thursday, January 30, 2020 | 23

Saturday, March 28

starring Mickey gilley & Johnny lee

GA $29 • Reserved $39 • VIP $49

Doors 7PM • Show 8PM

Purchase tickets online at SkyUteCasino.com, by calling 888.842.4180, at the Sky Ute Gift Shop or at the door. Must be 21 or better to enter casino.

Ignacio, CO 888.842.4180 SkyUteCasino.com

YOU’RE A STAR IN OUR SKY!