17 Ways to Do the Brewfest Right

art entertainment food drink music nightlife Thursday, August 25, 2016

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17 WAYS TO DO THE BREWFEST RIGHT 54 craft breweries descend on Buckley Park on Saturday. Plus: Durango breweries share the one beer you absolutely have to try, and loving and hating beer festivals

Also: Caitlin Cannon on girl bands and The Cannondolls EP release, Carver’s chef’s musthave items for every kitchen, DIY denim, and robot waiters

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What’s inside Volume 1 Number 43

August 25, 2016

Chief Executive Officer

10 How to: Chic,

do-it-yourself denim

Douglas Bennett V.P. of Finance and Operations

This fall’s current embellished-denim trends lend a fabulous opportunity to expand your jeans style in a creative, personal way. Get inspired and stay on-trend on-the-cheap by modifying denim items already in your closet with scissors, patches, fabric ephemera and markers.

Bob Ganley V.P. of Advertising David Habrat V.P. of Marketing Kricket Lewis Founding Editors Amy Maestas David Holub Editor/ designer/ art director David Holub dholub@bcimedia.com

4

Love it or Hate it

5

Sound

Downtown Lowdown

Album Review 7 9

16 Movies 17 Pages 18 Weed

Courtesy of Studio &

Anya Jaremko-Greenwold

»» Studio & is opening a new show this weekend. “A World

anya@bcimedia.com

Apart: New Paintings from Elizabeth Kinahan.” See page 21

375-4546

5

Contributors Katie Cahill

Caitlin Cannon fires off Quirky, badass all-girl Americana band The Cannondolls will be releasing their eclectic “Crumbs EP” with a release celebration taking place Saturday at The Rochester Courtyard and Animas City Theatre.

Roger Cottingham Taylor Ferraro Christopher Gallagher Bryant Liggett Jon E. Lynch Heather Narwid Cooper Stapleton

15 The virtual waiter will

be taking care of you?

Admit it, we have all been to an Olive Garden, Applebee’s or even Chili’s and ordered a generic appetizer from the third-generation tablet on the table. And now we wonder: Will computers one day take over my current job ... and the world?

21 Happening 23 Horoscope/ puzzles/ Bizarro

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Netflix and chill ‑ 420 edition 19

20 Savage Love

Robert Alan Wendeborn 247-3504

Seeing Through 18 the Smoke

Review 19

Cyle Talley Advertising

Beer

11 From the Editor

375-4551 Staff writer

6

Get Smart about a lifetime in business A iconic storefront since before anyone can remember, clothing store Stuart’s of Durango has closed its doors for the last time. Let owners Dennis and Anna Johnson tell you about their life and times in business.

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ON THE COVER The 2014 San Juan Brewfest tasting glass got dusted off this week.

David Holub/DGO

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@dg

dg

[ love it or hate it ]

[eat]

Beer festivals

Carver’s chef Dave: Must-haves for every kitchen

Love it Of all the festivals – music, craft, mushroom, art, wine, dandelion, pie, macaroni and cheese – beer festivals are my favorite.

I love paying a flat fee and having nothing but four hours of beer in front of me.

I love how beer festivals are always kind of music festivals too, with always-good bands to have something on hand on the small chance four-ounces-at-a-time isn’t enough.

I love the rock-solid excuse for day-drinking.

I love being able to talk with the people who produce and/or have insiders’ knowledge of the beer you’re drinking. Even the folks associated with beers like Colorado Native, which, once you realize they’re brewed by some puppet named AC Golden Brewing Co., which is actually a subsidiary of MillerCoors, you can turn your nose up to it like the beer snobs we all imagine ourselves.

I love the hundreds of different kinds of beer, the good stuff, the weird stuff that breweries are salivating to bring to true beer lovers – coconut stouts, pineapple IPAs, nitro vanilla porters, pepper saisons, farm house ales, apple sours, pear ciders, goosy goses, whathaveyou, then getting to vote on my favorite and arguing with friends about why my vote was the clearly the best.

I love the people-watching, the guy with the beer festival T-shirt going back 15 years, the twisted faces at the two-hour mark, the long lines at the two breweries still pouring by the end, the guy with the crazy beard who apparently came for the beer(d) festival.

Really, it’s everything I love packed into four hours.

– David Holub

Hate it I’m not really one for festivals. I respect the general spirit of them all (music, booze, renaissance, whatever), but I hate the crowds. It reminds me of living in New York City, pressed against other people’s sweaty bodies in Times Square or shoved into someone’s armpit on the subway. I can handle only so much humanity in one day, and crowds force you to absorb the maximum reality of other human beings in a very short amount of time. It’s exhausting. I’m also impatient and don’t like waiting in line. Festival attendees are rowdy and loud and usually don’t make ideal line buddies.

I do quite enjoy beer. But a festival during which you sample beer after beer seems tricky. First, drinking beer makes you pee a lot, and I don’t relish the prospect of visiting porta potties. They’re rarely clean and often run out of toilet paper or hand sanitizer. And although the samples you receive at beer fests are small, beer is still incredibly filling. You need to eat if you’re drinking, but I’m not sure how much food AND beer I can physically stomach.

We chatted with Dave Cuntz, executive chef/owner at Durango staple Carver Brewing Co., about the most versatile tools and ingredients everyone should keep in their kitchen.

What instruments would you recommend? »»A good blender. Vitamix is my favorite, but Cuisinart can do the job. »»Good pots and pans; heavy, solid base, copper-lined is the ultimate. Wooden spoons, spatulas, strainers.

Durango Coffee Company has lots of fun kitchen gadgets – anything on that wall is something you can use. Ace Hardware also has great blenders, kitchen aids and knives.

»» Carver Brewing’s executive chef/owner Dave Cuntz

»»Good set of knives. You need a French knife, 8 to 10 inch. Just make sure you’re able to sharpen them. There’s usually a gentleman at the Farmer’s Market who can help you keep knives sharpened over time.

What are the most useful ingredients to have on hand? »»Salt and pepper, for bringing flavors out of everything. »»Corn starch to make slurries to help thicken sauces and soups. »»It’s always nice to have fresh herbs; basil, oregano, rosemary, thyme, the mothers herbs of cooking. Throw some oregano in Mexican or Italian dishes ... they work in pretty much any ethnic or American food. Cayenne is always good to brighten things up, put a little heat in there. »»As far as the refrigerator is concerned, I always have carrots, onion, celery, lettuces and tomatoes. Things that you can bring together to finish a lot of different dishes out.

I know it hurts to hear this one, but beer is also among the most caloric intoxicating beverages available. Don’t get me wrong, it’s delicious. But I eat enough carbs (pasta, pizza, sandwiches – OK, now I’m getting hungry) in my daily life, so I usually try to stick with spirits. Despite what I might think, beer is still the world’s most widely consumed alcoholic drink, apparently third most popular after water and tea. Our human priorities are clear: 1) Drink water to stay alive 2) Get wasted.

What are some quick, simple meals you enjoy?

—— – Anya Jaremko-Greenwold

»»Spaghetti and meatballs. Ground

beef, make your homemade meatballs, and roast those in the oven. And while that’s happening, get your pot of water going. For sauce, there’s nothing wrong with pouring out a little Prego if you don’t have a lot of time. »»Tacos are really fast and easy.

Roast a chicken or buy a roasted chicken, pull it off the bone, add cumin, red chili, coriander, a little oregano, make a broth, and put that in soft shell/hard shell tacos.

Any other tips?

Think about what you make from scratch and what you need. You want to buy things fresh – and when they’re on sale, buy a lot and freeze it. There’s nothing wrong with freezing and pulling as needed. I always break up my frozen packages into smaller packages in Ziploc bags, so I don’t have to pull out a big thing. I’ll save broccoli stems and the carcasses of chicken stock. After you’ve eaten a rotisserie chicken, you can make a good chicken noodle soup with the carcasses – they really enrich it and add flavor.

—— Anya Jaremko-Greenwold

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[sound]

Caitlin Cannon, on girl bands, songwriting and an EP release Badass all-girl Americana band The Cannondolls are local favorites. This Saturday, the quirky musical group will be releasing their eclectic first studio collaboration “Crumbs EP.” (The title track “Crumbs” is available on iTunes now) Produced by Andy Rok (founding member of Flobots), the five-song EP is alt-country with hints of power-ballad pop, doo-wop, ragtime and folk. Two tracks have been described as intended “soulful murder ballads” that emerged as “power anthems emanating struggle and remorse.” The EP mixes misery with optimism and energetic melodies. your art, whatever that is. For me, it meant taking a step back on paper, going and getting my cosmetology license so I could live comfortably and have time to be able to write, instead of playing four-hour shows in bars every night and touring around and feeling burned out.

The Cannondolls are Caitlin Cannon, Kate Willyard, Alissa Wolf and Amanda Fresh. Cannon considers this EP a follow-up to her 2011 album “Caitlin Cannon and the Artillery,” when Cannon was opening for The Reverend Horton Heat and sharing stages with Lydia Loveless and Shooter Jennings.

“Crumbs” marks Cannon’s debut songwriting collaboration with Willyard.

Tell me about the “Crumbs EP” release.

A special EP release celebration is taking place Saturday, Aug. 27, at The Rochester Courtyard and The Animas City Theatre, with support by Daphne Willis, Hailey Steele, Farmington Hill and Andy Rok and The Real Deal.

(Note: The Rochester show is now sold out, though the ACT performance still has tickets available). We chatted with Cannon about her evolution as a songwriter and misconceptions about female-fronted groups.

What assumptions do people make about an all-female band?

I think they assume we all get our periods at the same time, like nuns.

Which is true. They assume there’s a lot of hair-braiding and pillow fighting and sleepovers. We’re actually focused on trying to write songs and do something with those songs. People think a girl band is helpless. We lug around all our own gear. We can lift 50-pound speakers. If someone offers to help, we usually let them; but that’s not because we’re girls, that’s because we’re not stupid.

How have you changed or grown as a songwriter since your last record?

Some things are better, some things are worse. In 2010, I knew like four chords.

I really didn’t know what I was doing. I had been pursuing an acting career in New York and was feeling kind of empty about it. I didn’t have the passion for it anymore. I got more interested in what I wanted to say and how I would say it, as opposed to saying all these other

Courtesy of The Cannondolls

»» (From left) Amanda Fresh, Alissa Wolf, Caitlin Cannon and Kate Willyard

The Cannondolls EP Release Mini-Fest Daphne Willis, Hailey Steele, The Cannondolls Unplugged When: 4 - 7 p.m. Saturday Where: The Rochester Courtyard

Farmington Hill, The Cannondolls, Andy Rok & the Real Deal When: 9 p.m. - 12 a.m. Saturday

scripted lines. I started writing songs, and the thing about those early songs is that I wasn’t worried about how to communicate a lyric universally. Now, if a line is filler, I wouldn’t let it sit there in the song. I would never record the song unless the lyrics are perfect. If I think something is too cliché, I won’t let it be in there. So there’s something sweet about that first record – I wanted the songs to be good, but I only had the

Where: Animas City Theatre »»All Day Mini-Fest Passes (tickets for both shows) $18 pre-sale or $20 at the door. »»Tickets for individual shows $10 pre-sale and $12 at the door. »»Pre-sale tickets available at Southwest Sound or contact cannondolls@gmail.com. For the ACT event, tickets also available at www.animascitytheatre.com

skills in songwriting and the understanding that I had at that point.

How do you feel about your songwriting now?

I just wanna write one good song before I die. And I still don’t think I’ve written that song. Maybe the one I’m working on now. But I always think the one I’m working on now is The One. You gotta make it so that you can do

When you try to release a record the way a label would do it for you, there’s a lot involved. All the fine print that goes on, getting everything registered with SoundExchange, anyone who might give you your union stuff, your ASCAP and all that. Anyone who might possibly pay you any money, including Spotify – even though it’s only like $.0001. Then the record had to be recorded, all the songs produced and fleshed out. The record had to be mixed and mastered ... Once we had our physical product, we were able to start doing pre-promo ... And you can start going after American Songwriter, Spin, Rolling Stone ... our dream press.

I sent Rolling Stone a snarky cover letter.

It was just short of like, ‘F you, you’ll never read this. You don’t know what you’re missing, you a-holes.’ I sent that and didn’t hear back ... I guess reverse psychology doesn’t work, not even on Rolling Stone. Then you do all of your licensing; before your songs are released, you’re more attractive to licensors, who are looking to plug songs into TV shows or films or video games. I think if you’re calling Chase Bank and you’re on hold, you’ll hear one of my old songs. I get a check for that. In the Chase Banking world, I’m getting very good exposure.

And this whole time, you’re planning your EP release. There is going to be a show on August 27 – like a big celebration for everybody.

—— Anya Jaremko-Greenwold and David Holub This interview has been lightly edited for space.

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[sound]

Downtown Lowdown | Bryant Liggett

New Orleans Suspects are the embodiment of the Big Easy

T

heir résumé reads like a history book of American funk and the music of New Orleans. Jeff Watkins is a saxophone player who spent 15 years with James Brown. Jake Eckert played guitar with the Dirty Dozen Brass Band, and drummer Willie Green has spent over 30 years with The Neville Brothers. Classically-trained keyboard player C.R. Gruver has been around New Orleans, and in Denver jam-band Polytoxic for years, and bass player Charlie Wooten has been playing the music of New Orleans all his life.

That’s the current lineup of The New Orleans Suspects, performing Friday (Aug. 26) at the Durango V.F.W. They began as a loose collection of friends meeting to play, with no intent on regular gigs, recording or even rehearsing; The Maple Leaf Bar, a venue in the Carrolton neighborhood of New Orleans and within walking distance of the bandmembers’ homes, was the petri dish that gave the band life.

“It started as almost a jam session at the Maple Leaf, which is a mainstay here in town. At the time we were all in different bands. Occasionally, we would all be in town at the same time, but it was never really something that was planned,” said Eckert in a recent interview. “The owner of the club would call me up and say, ‘Hey Jake, can you put a band together, we have a slot we have to fill.’ So I’d call the guys from the neighborhood. That happened once; we had a great time. Then a few other times it happened. Eventually, I’d get called and he’d say, ‘Can you get the ‘usual suspects’ together?’ That was 2009, 2010. Then we played a month of Wednesday nights. By 2011, we added saxophone, were approached by management and booking, and asked to take this on the road.” Ditch the word “usual” and add “New Orleans” and you have a band and a brand.

There are very few cities that have an identifiable style of music recognized by name. Mention music of New Orleans to anyone and it’s likely the first sound heard in your head is a style of horn-driven funk born from jazz and blues.

20704 US-160 Durango, CO.

www.nissanofdurango.com

970.259.3940

Bryant’s best Friday: Rock and country with The Lawn Chair Kings, 5:30 p.m. No cover. The Balcony, 600 Main Ave. upstairs. Information: 422-8008.

Friday: Funk with New Orleans Suspects, 7:30. $28. Durango V.F.W. 1550 Main Ave. Information: durangoacousticmusic.org “There’s a lot of America in New Orleans.

Because of the location, being one of the southern-most port cities,” said Eckert. “You have this Cuban influence, you have Delta blues. Dixieland, second-line brass-band music, and the Buddy Bolden era of jazz; Professor Longhair, Allen Toussaint.

It’s all coming together. A lot of that sound has to do with the geography.”

The band is touring in support of its new record “Kaleidoscoped,” a textbook of an album of New

Orleans funk, loaded with guitar and driving horns over beds of funk and zydeco.

“New Orleans” music is as American as the folk, country and string-band music of early Appalachia; music found in the vast public-domain songbook that is chock-full of centuries-old numbers that have been recorded as much by musicians tied to New Orleans as they have on country and bluegrass records. That’s something Eckert learned after leaving the mountain areas of North Carolina for the Big Easy.

“Doc Watson would play ‘Jesus on the Mainline’ and ‘I’ll Fly Away.’ These traditional gospel tunes.

When I joined Dirty Dozen, we were playing the same music,” said Eckert. “I realized this is American music. The difference is the New Orleans rhythm, based on the second-line beat.”

Bryant Liggett is a freelance writer and KDUR station

Bottom Line Summer Service Specials

Bottom SUMMER SERVICE SPECIALS

Courtesy of The New Orleans Suspects; photo by Jay Skolnick

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[sound]

[best of twitter]

New at Southwest Sound Aug. 26

Itself” is anything to go on, the addition of some world elements will only add more depth to their sound.

1. De La Soul,“And The Anonymous Nobody” Sure to be a glorious return to form after four years of absence, “And The Anonymous Nobody” sees the hip-hop trio on the top of its game. This album includes collaborations with some certified legends, including Damon Albarn (better known as the genius behind Gorillaz) and David Byrne of the Talking Heads.

4. Album Leaf,“Between Waves”

2. Prophets of Rage,“Party’s Over” Can the rage be palpable after all the years? Can the old folks still rage with the best of them? Tom Morello, Chuck D and B Real are poised to prove that they can. (I’m sorry I called B Real and Chuck D old, don’t hurt me.)

3. Glass Animals,“How To Be A Human Being” “Zaba,” the previous album from the Oxford indie outfit, rocked the music world with their seamless blend of psychedelia, synths and a dash of R & B. The new album promises to be all that and more, and if the single “Life

This San Diego-based ambient/ post rock group has been releasing masterpieces on the periphery for almost 20 years. Imagine if Massive Attack and Explosions in the Sky had a baby, that’s the Album Leaf. This will be the best album to wind down the summer with. Approach with an open mind and be ready to experience an aural equivalent of the sun shining through the crack in your sunglasses as you drive up to Andrews Lake for one last summer hurrah.

5. Inquisition,“Bloodshed Across The Empyrean Altar Beyond The Celestial Zenith”

FOUNDER OF HOGWARTS: okay, so we all know there are four types of kid. brave, smart, evil and miscellaneous.

SCHOOL BOARD: yes, continue.

Carl Kinsella @TVsCarlKinsella

It is perfectly acceptable to stare at any species through binoculars except my own.

Ted Travelstead @trumpetcake

Don’t get in a relationship w/ someone before knowing what voices they use around babies & pets.

Dr. Dalia @daliamalek

Wimps and poseurs need not apply here. Inquisition makes the blackest of black metal, conjured up from the bowels of the anticosmic reaches of the human spirit. And yes, that is the actual album title.

I only work out so I’m strong enough to hold every breed of dog like a baby.

—— Cooper Stapleton

Mike Primavera @primawesome

What’s new The Devil Makes Three,“Redemption and Ruin” Available: Aug. 26 via New West Records as a digital download, CD and vinyl LP The Santa Cruz, California-based trio of guitarist Pete Bernhard, upright bassist Lucia Turino and guitarist/tenor banjo player Cooper McBean have deviated just a bit on their fifth full-length album. Not so much stylistically, considering their unique hodgepodge blend of country, old-time jazz, rockabilly and all other touch points on the Americana spectrum. Rather, the band has enlisted a slew of like-minded musician friends (Emmylou Harris, Jerry Douglas, Darrell Scott, among others) to pay tribute on a record comprised solely of covers.

This will come as little surprise to fans of their live show, where covers have been included for some time. Kris Kristofferson, Ralph Stanley and Doc Watson have all been covered in the past, and are now being included on “Redemption and Ruin.” The homage doesn’t stop there, with other canonized artists getting their due: Townes Van Zandt, Hank Williams, Robert Johnson.

Per the bands website, there are two distinct sides to the record: “It’s half gos-

pel songs with a proclivity towards the darker end of the spectrum of religious music (Redemption) and half songs of vice (Ruin). In a very strict sense, the band-members were looking for songs which fully and wholeheartedly fit in one of those two categories. There could be no in between; it was all or nothing.”

Recommended if you like cover albums, Americana and artists such as Shovels & Rope, The Defibulators, A.Tom Collins or Old Crow Medicine Show.

FIND YOUR NEXT ADVENTURE SECRET HIDEOUTS · KILLER WEEKENDS · GEAR & HOW TOS

www.adventurepro.us

—— Jon E. Lynch KDUR_PD@fortlewis.edu

������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������ Thursday, August 25, 2016 | 7

[Expert Advice on Trivial Affairs]

Get Smart | Cyle Talley

On a lifetime in business A iconic storefront since before anyone can remember, clothing store Stuart’s of Durango has closed its doors for the last time. Let owners Dennis and Anna Johnson tell you about their life and times in business, and what it’s meant to be a part of the fabric (pun intended) of Durango.

Tell us how you came to own Stuart’s.

tell us, “You’ve done good by us.”

Anna: Dennis was here when his dad opened the store, and then left for New York City. He was an actor.

That’s where he met me, an actress. That would’ve been in 1969. Time went on – walks in the park, going to the zoo – and he said, “Do you wanna be a cowgirl?” He said he’d like to go back to Durango, that his dad had a store. I said, “Do I have to wear cowboy boots?”

We moved and bought the store a few years later when his dad was ready to retire. We started the Durango Reparatory Theatre and we – we were very busy. We volunteered for a lot of things, because that’s what you should do. The community needs your talents somewhere.

What will you miss most?

Stuart’s storefront is a Durango icon ...

Dennis: She has unlimited imagination. So often, some kind of change or shift comes into play, and so, to have someone who can handle that with aplomb is nice.

Anna: The day-to-day.

You get up in the morning, and there’s the list. And then you’re on the phone talking to a customer or a vendor, and you’re crossing things off of the list and then something goes wrong – and it’s not frustrating, it’s just part of the list.

But, we’re at an age where, I think [laughs] we can learn not to miss it too much. We won’t have that structure, so we’ll have to create a different structure.

What did you admire most about each other in business through the years?

Jerry McBride/BCI Media

Anna: Oh, the storefront! »» Dennis and Anna Johnson at Stuart’s in June.

Isn’t that wonderful? Nate Stein, who came out from New because they knew they were getting a value for what York, he moved to Rico to start they were spending, we made it through. More and more, a mercantile there. This building is from the late 1880s people are not so interested in going to shops. They’re and he had traveled, so he was moving his Rico mercaninterested in going online. We certainly understand that. tile into Durango and came in and redid the store. He did But you can’t sustain a store with people coming in, trythe front – the Bauhaus tradition, very German – with ing things on, and then going online to see if they can find that wonderful curve and the curved windows and all of it cheaper. Of course, styles change. Business is adapting the insets. Dennis and his dad built the fitting stations – not only to fashion but to clientele. It would be much and rear of the store. But the front, that’s Nate. He had more difficult to start a new store these days. They have wonderful taste – he also liked to gamble. He’d come in on Saturday nights as we closed, and he’d ask to cash to compete with the Internet. It’s just the way people a check. He had a poker game he went to on Saturday shop now. It might not always be that way. Maybe one nights, but he never thought in advance to go to the bank, day people will say, “You know, I really want to go into a so we became it. The check was always good, though. shop and have someone fit me for a suit. I want to have [laughs] someone who knows what they’re doing.”

You’ve seen some big changes in business, haven’t you?

Dennis: We have a history at Stuart’s. We’ve served families’ second and even third generations.

Anna: Oh yes. We endured 2008. But because we had a history with people, because we were dependable,

Anna: We’re theater people. We like applause. Our applause are the people who come in again and again who

Anna: There’s a lot of things I admire, but insofar as business, I admire his taste level. It’s unbelievable. There are people who seek him out at trade shows. He understands the quality, the style, the needs, the purpose. It’s an incredible taste level. It taught me a lot. When I see him talking to vendors and people who say, “Dennis, tell me what you think about this.” He’s very honest, very straightforward, and he’s not afraid to tell that, “Well, it’s a piece of ... you know.” Or he might say, “Well, this is nice.

Look at the stitching here, this detail.” He taught me a lot.

At the very beginning when I was buying, I’d call him in and ask him what he thought. Sometimes it’d become a seminar where I’d be watching my watch, but [laughs].

Cyle Talley remembers when Woolworth’s was where Eolus now is. As David Bowie says, “Ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-chchanges!” If there’s something you’d like to Get Smart about, email him at: cyle@cyletalley.com

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[beer]

First Draughts | Robert Alan Wendeborn

The rest of the world is catching on with IPAs

M

uch like action films, Starbucks and fast food hamburgers, America has created a trend with the IPA, and it is currently spreading across the globe. Breweries from Asia to Europe, New Zealand to New York are brewing the hop-heavy brew and with a ton of variety and innovation (and a lot of similarities, to be honest). And because of this trend, walking down the import aisle at the local liquor store is starting to look like the craft isle. To see if the imported craft beer holds its own against the American craft, I tasted a few imported IPAs. The first brew I tried was from a Japanese brewery that, because of the label and language barriers, I couldn’t tell you what the name of the brewery was, but with some googling and beer detective work, I figured it out: It’s by Kiuchi Brewery, which started in 1823 as a sake brewer, but began brewing craft beer in 1996 under the name Hitachino Nest. The specific beer I purchased was Dai Dai Ale, an orange IPA. There was some writing on the side of the bottle and the numbers 99 percent and 6.2 percent, so I’m assuming the 6.2 percent was the ABV and the 99 percent was for how awesome the beer is. With soda-like carbonation, a thick, hazy appearance, Dai Dai was cool and refreshing up front, with lots of strong floral notes and a strong flavor of orange bitters in the finish. It also had some very enjoyable organic earthy notes that didn’t seem hoppy or malty, but a yeast or production/storage character that really set it apart from a typical IPA, especially the typical fruit IPA. In the same geographic vicinity, The Yeastie Boys from New Zealand makes an IPA with Earl Grey Tea called

Gunnamatta. This IPA was on another level, with every aspect of the beer being highlighted. It had a beautiful rusted gold color and very floral-based aromas. The flavor was a powerful and aroma-driven Fruit Loop cereal combination with a great herbaceous bitterness in the end balancing the re-

sidual sugars. Even with all this going on, it was still a smooth ride all the way to the end.

Before this tour de IPA, I had never had a Danish beer, but Amager Bryghus is gaining an international reputation. They’ve done numerous collaborations with other craft breweries, such as Jester King and Mikkeller.

The beer I tasted, Orange Crush Session IPA, is a collaboration with Cigar City based in Tampa, Florida. Orange Crush is a bit of a contradiction: it’s clean and dirty; it’s refreshing and challenging; it’s bold and subtle. The 750 mL-bottle was poured into three glasses and each got more and more hazy and even had heavy particles and sludge in the third glass. The first glass was smooth and clean and refreshing with a really heavy pop of orange soda and a strong orange rind bitterness. Tons of little floral notes in the aroma that only come in if you’re pushing through the orange. The sessionable qualities were obvious. The second glass with heavy haze and a few particles was more earthy, herbal, with a stronger roasted character coming out.

This was a totally different beer. And the third glass was literally undrinkable as it was half sludge.

It’s really awesome to see the IPA being taken in different directions both geographically and artistically. As a style in the States, it’s still evolving (I think the Beer Judge Certification Program keeps adding a new style of IPA every year) and as the style gets more diverse overseas, that will keep adding to the diversity in the already-packed IPA section of the beer shelf.

Robert Alan Wendeborn is a former cellar operator at Ska Brewing and current lead cellar operator at Tin Roof Brewing in Baton Rouge, Louisiana.

������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������ Thursday, August 25, 2016 | 9

[Sartorial over-enthusiasm with Heather of Sideshow]

Style Fetish | Heather Narwid

How to: Chic, do-it-yourself denim This fall’s current embellished-denim trends lend a fabulous opportunity to expand your jeans style in a creative, personal way. Get inspired and stay on-trend on-the-cheap by modifying denim items already in your closet with scissors, patches, fabric ephemera and markers.

Hemlines:

Graffiti-4-Eva

The “mullet” hem

Sharpie makes markers that are just for fabrics, and they are so fun. Geek-out with a repetitive pattern of dots, dashes, chevrons or stars. Make your jeans or jacket ’80s-outspoken with words, phrases and band names. One could, if detail-oriented and stoned enough, draw a print of their choosing over the entirety of the garment and it would look amazing. Draw on a meta, trompe l’oeil faux-patch complete with fake stitching or your lover’s initials in a heart.

Cut the front to a cropped length that’s shorter than the back, either curved or at a right-angle. Leave the edge raw to fray out, or use a pinking shear with zigzag blades to slow fraying.

The cropped flare A great transitional season piece with a fresh silhouette. Looks great with flat sandals, an ankle boot or heels. Take your old bell-bottoms or flares and cut anywhere from just-above-ankle length to a few inches below the knee. Not flared enough? Cut slits up the side seams for another few inches.

Other types of fabric paint pens and markers are available for shiny, dimensional, metallic or glitter effects, too.

Deconstruct

Frayed-fringe hems

The hem-cutting and frayed hem ideas can be used on a skirt, dress or jacket, as well. Cut-fringe hem a frumpy denim dress into a cuter mini, chop the arms off a jacket to make a vest, then crop the length to wear with dresses. Or try an oddball short-sleeved jacket, just to be weird. Remove the back pockets from jeans to reveal the dark shadows for an interesting effect.

For self-fringe, cut deep, thin strips into the denim, straight up the leg from the ankle for about six inches.

After washing and drying, the cuts will fray out into a textural, deconstructed fringe. Looks cool on skinnies or flares, or try this technique on the cropped flare.

If you’d like a neater look, attach pre-made rayon or leather fringe around the hem of your cropped jeans or the hem of a cropped denim vest or jacket.

How the hell?

Patches, please

»»Some of these ideas use patches that are iron-on.

Cotton denim can withstand a high heat, so melt those suckers on anywhere. Check the fabric content of the garment and adjust the iron’s heat accordingly.

Add patches Denim designers from Gucci to Levis are making patched and embroidered jeans, and they are pricey!

Do it yourself for cheap and collect funky and figurative new and vintage embroidered patches and iron or sew onto jeans or a denim jacket. Long, thin patches looks great on the back of a jacket sleeve and tiny ones fit well on a collar. Have fun with the pre-existing design, panels and seams to create a pleasing and proportionate patch configuration. Recycled scraps like ribbon, screen-prints, squares of fabric or interesting details cut from worn-out garments or other textiles can be upcycled as patches and appliqués, too.

Large-scale Square and rectangle-patched jeans create a simpler, tonal graphic look. Use a large suede or leather piece to appliqué a rectangle from mid-thigh to below the knee. Use different shades of denim blue or wilder contrasting fabrics like lace and plaid in large pieces alone or cubist-layered. Any stitching used to attach the patch that is visible or contrasting is OK; it adds to the crafted feel.

»»Parts of sleeves and legs can’t be accessed by a sewing machine, so you may need to hand-sew or use iron-on fusing material.

David Holub/DGO

»» TOP: Heather Narwid models a frayed-fringe “mullet” hem. BOTTOM: Narwid models a ’90s zip denim jacket with vintage and new iron-on patches.

Patch but preserve Patches look awesome when placed among or underneath frays, holes and other distressed areas. I like the contrast of a fresh and different fabric with the denim’s authentic worn-by-time character. Preserve the look of these distressed bits by patching under the holey area, letting the patch peek through the frays, creating a collage of textures.

»»Visible hand-stitching is charming and simple, use obvious colors and play with using yarn, thread or embroidery floss to attach. »»Professional seamstresses have embroidery machines. Get your garment custom-embroidered or hire them to attach the patches in your design’s layout. »»Have a DIY denim-update get-together with friends to share ideas, skills, tools and materials. »»Pinterest is a great online resource for ideas and inspiration.

For more DIY clothing tips and tricks, visit Heather’s clothing store Sideshow at 208 County Road 250 in Durango, Tuesdays through Saturdays 10 a.m. to 6 p.m.

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[CTRL-A]

David Holub |DGO editor

“

It’s not about the beer anymore, it’s about the alcohol.

Benny

”

Deep into my first craft beer festival, I played peacemaker What follows is an account of the first beer festival I ever attended, the Brass City Brew Fest in Waterbury, Connecticut, in 2008, with a friend I’ll call “Benny.” Oh how far we’ve come.

I

waited four minutes in Benny’s driveway before he emerged to his front porch and down the stairs to the driveway. His hair was wet and he lacked the decency of shoes or socks.

We were on our way to a beer festival, surprising since Benny was a recovering alcoholic and I’d never had more than three beers in public.

“There’s no way he’s getting in my car without shoes,” I muttered, recognizing the fact that anyone’s bare feet were not welcome in my car before a beer festival, much less after one. He veered toward his car, popped the trunk and retrieved a pair of retro running sneakers.

Benny was six years older but we’d somehow arrived at the same place in our lives: both married (he’s still going strong; I’m not) and in our respective careers for roughly the same amounts of time. While the five preceding years had been similar for us, the first 25 were not. At 22, I’d been married for two years and drove a four-door sedan. Benny had tested brass knuckles on people’s jaws. I’d taken the easy, safe, predictable path. Benny was lucky to be alive.

At the festival, 15 minutes before the scheduled start, we joined a line 60 deep, and when the gates opened, event staffers checked IDs and provided us with a red wristband.

Once inside the festival, hundreds of craft brew taps were dripping with nervous perspiring tension.

Before I could put away my first four ounces, I noticed not one but two men standing alone already staring blankly at the grass a few yards ahead of them (except when a woman – any woman – passed, and then their eyes would shift vaguely in that general direction).

Being set free in this mess of unpredictability made me uneasy. But if I could have picked anyone to be standing by, to have my back if things got nuts, it was Benny. Below the surface of normalcy, Benny was a crazy bastard, his hooligan’s mentality looming beneath a steady teaching job and homeownership.

He was the kind of guy who concealed a tactical knife behind his belt “just in case,” and through his martial arts training knew how to inflict injury so that even the burliest opponent would weep in submission.

Not far into our beer sampling, I began to notice the space around us shrinking. Eighteen-foot swaths of grass were now cut in half. The volume of the conversations around us started to compete with the blasting live music. Like a crowded bar, everyone was shouting because everyone was shouting.

Getting a closer look at the beer festival crowd, I couldn’t help but dwell on the disappointing

classlessness of our beer-drinking brethren. I had expected a bunch of Rocky Mountain-minded, upper-middle class ski-bums-turned-businessmen-butstill-somewhat-subversive wearing fleece vests and Chacos, which, in my mind, was what a craft beer connoisseur looked like. Perhaps my first mistake was that the festival would be full of craft beer connoisseurs. Instead, it was a lot of dudes three years on the wrong side of dropping out of college.

Benny drained his glass then said, “Let’s do this.”

We returned to the tents and each chose the same, a toasted lager. I took a sip of mine then squinted into the distance trying to pick apart its flavor.

“It almost has a nuttiness to it.”

“Are you [bleeping] kidding me? It almost has a nuttiness to it. Shit, this guy,” Benny complained to no one in particular.

I pleaded my case. “Can you not taste the nuttiness?”

Benny whipped the remaining drops of his nutty toasted lager onto the ground and headed back inside the tent before I could discuss the beer’s qualities any further.

By 3 p.m., normal people who arrived in groups were now standing by themselves, blankly eyeing passers-by, regardless of gender. And more and more people began to use their friends to brace themselves as they walked from tent to tent.

Around 4 p.m., still an hour from the scheduled end, I noticed the activity of two bros who had staked out a patch of grass about 15 feet away. The dudes, both in their mid-20s, began pushing and jostling one another in what appeared to be bubbling alcohol-induced aggression.

If sober, they would be participating in the most macho of courtship dances, each jab, each push, each point of connection a step closer to climax, to closing the suppressed homoerotic distance between them. Bored with their aggressive flirtation, they decided to start pushing one another into innocent festival-goers to see what happened. Most people simply said “Oh, sorry” or “My bad.” What these two were hoping for, of course, was for someone to not understand, to take exception to being bumped.

If I were a different kind of person, I would have casually made my way over to the two gentlemen, winked at the cop stationed a few yards away and told them simply to knock it off. And if need be, I would have been willing to bust some heads before someone else had to. But of course, I stood by innocently, safely avoiding eye contact with anyone for fear that my look might be taken as challenging. Seeing these two looking for a fight and assuming they were not alone, I dried my beer glass with my shirt and put it in my breast pocket. Taps were open for another hour, but I

sensed I might need to be the sanity at some point.

By 4:15, I met up with Benny. His eyes had dropped a bit. He looked tired and sluggish but moody, not unlike most of the people still milling about. My goal became getting Benny out of the festival without incident. Some of those passing appeared to be in advanced shambles, having found ever new ways to contort their faces, their lips curling halfway around their faces to create permanent snarls. The few vendors still serving had lines out the tent.

Noticing this, Benny said, “It’s not about the beer anymore, it’s about the alcohol.”

We made one more trip into the tent. As we pushed through a crowded tent, Benny crossed paths with the rowdy guys I’d witnessed before and was suddenly nose to nose and shouting with one of them.

“Seriously? Seriously?” Benny yelled in his face.

“You seriously want to do this?”

In theory, there was nothing I’d have liked to see more at that moment than for Benny and the guy to “do this,” thinking back to Benny’s brass-knucklethemed tales and his brawls-at-the park stories.

Because of whatever reasons – smallness and insecurity – the guy and his buddy needed to turn a peaceful day in the park into something that made better sense to them. Because of that, Benny was ready to turn this guy’s face into abstract expressionism, and I couldn’t wait to watch. For all the times I’d stood by and done the safe, non-confrontational thing, I wanted Benny to push this guy’s face into the beer-soaked grass until he trembled in panic for lack of oxygen.

And then something in me took over. “All rright.

OK, we’re all friends here. We’re all just having fun,” I said calmly but firmly, grabbing Benny by the shoulder and pushing him along.

“I should’ve smacked that bitch in the head,” Benny said, half smiling. “I could have just grabbed that guy’s ear and twisted it. Just twisted it.”

Benny stopped at the port-o-can before we left . On the way to the car, we hit a nearly-empty pizza joint. As we sipped waters and nibbled pizza, Benny mentioned how during his final trip to the port-o-can, following his dust up, he found himself standing next to the guy he’d been nose to nose with minutes earlier. This time, Benny didn’t have a friend to push him along and the other guy didn’t have anyone to get his back.

“I said, ‘How do you feel about being over here just me and you? What with you being a little [bleep] er and all ...?’” Benny said.

“And what did he do?” I asked.

“Nothing.”

Safe inside an empty restaurant, protected by the water in our glasses, I said, “Man, I wish you would have twisted that guy’s ear. Just twisted it.”

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[beer]

17SAN JUAN BREWFEST tips and tricks for surviving the

Here are all the ways to do the brewfest right, with some help from Steamworks’ Sean Moriarty: 1. Talk to the brewers You’ll have access to the guys or gals who actually designed the beer you’re drinking. So if you like something, ask more about it! This is their livelihood, and learning more about the product will only make you a better-rounded drinker.

2. Limit your beer intake Slow your roll and don’t overdo it or you’ll be embarrassed/dehydrated/hungover the next day.

Drink equal parts water and beer, and bring a water bottle with you. There will also be a free water station at the event.

3. Eat a big breakfast

Load up on carbs and proteins, and hit up the food vendors once you’ve been at the fest a few hours. Food is the ideal buffer between you and the alcohol coursing nimbly through your bloodstream. Eating slows down your body’s brew absorption.

4. Start off with lighter-flavored beers Says Sean Moriarty: “Once you’ve overwhelmed your palate with so many big IPAs and stouts, the lighter stuff you could’ve enjoyed earlier in the day is probably not going to taste like much at all.”

5. Try not to spend time

drinking beers you’ve had before This is your opportunity to blaze new territory. We love our local breweries, but there are so many outof-towners in attendance! Try beer you can’t easily sample next time you’re out for the night.

6. Make sure you have a designated driver or safe way of getting home Durango has Uber now, but keep in mind there aren’t an endless supply of drivers and you might have to wait awhile, especially on a weekend.

The Main Avenue Trolley will also run the length

of Main Avenue from the Iron Horse Inn to the Transit Center Downtown with multiple stops, free on the day of Brewfest. (Trolley runs from 7 a.m. to 10 p.m. every 20 minutes). The following cab companies are also providing rides to/from the event: Buckhorn Limousine (769-0933), Durango Cab (259-4818), Animas Transportation (259-1315)

7. Don’t just go hunting for the highest alcohol beers Says Moriarty: “Session beers are so popular Continued on Page 14

San Juan Brewfest: What you need to know Ah, beer festivals. The perfect setting for day drinking and debauchery. Sampling and swilling beer is less snobby than slurping down wine, and beer is definitely the favored form of booze in Durango. Whether you’re a serious beer connoisseur or just looking to get drunk (hey, no shame in that), here is everything you need to know about this Saturday’s San Juan Brewfest in Buckley Park.

About the fest There will be 54 craft breweries and distilleries in attendance, and each will bring at least two different beers. You can sample as many beers as you want from your souvenir 5 oz. tasting glass. There will also be live music and food vendors. No dogs and no one under 21 admitted.

The new brewery participants this year are Barrel Brewing Co. (Bend, OR), Ballast Point Brewing and Spirits (San Diego), Big Sky Brewing Co. (Missoula, MT), Crazy Mountain Brewing Co. (Edwards), Eddyline Brewing (Buena Vista), Full Sail Brewing Co.(Hood River, OR), Golden Block Brewery (Silverton), Goose Island Beer Co. (Chicago), Melvin Brewing Co. (Alpine, WY) and Renegade Brewing Co. (Denver).

Ticket Prices »»The Fest sold out the past two years, so get your tickets ASAP at www.SanJuanBrewfest.com/tickets »»General admission ticket $30 (there might be a few left to sell at the gate)

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GO! What: San Juan Brewfest 2016 When: 1 to 5 p.m. Saturday Aug. 27 Where: Buckley Park, 12th Street and Main Ave. »»Upgraded general admission ticket $45 (you get in ½ hour early at 12:30 p.m. and receive an event t-shirt) »»Designated driver ticket $15 (DDs must be at least 21 years old) Live music »»Hog MaGundy (Fort Collins) JamGrass/ Americana/Bluegrass »»Liver Down the River (Durango) An eclectic mix of psychedelic bluegrass and funk »»Sweetwater String Band (Mammoth Lakes, CA) Cello-driven high Sierra soulgrass Full schedule 1 p.m.: Gates open for general admission ticket holders and day-of ticket purchases 1 p.m.: Hog Magundy 2:15 p.m.: Liver Down the River 4 p.m.: Sweetwater String Band; food services ends in VIP Lounge 4:30 p.m.: People’s Choice Award Presentation 4:50 p.m.: Last call 5 p.m.: Brewfest ends

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[beer] From Page 13

these days and they’re so delicious, you can actually enjoy those without having a bad time by the end of the festival. You don’t have to go and only look for the big IPAs or imperial stouts.”

8. Wear your T-shirt from a previous year’s beer festival People think you’re super cool. Or just any beer-themed shirt (the more esoteric, the better), to show your commitment to the craft.

9. Bring cash

Beer fest beer recs

»» Participating Durango

breweries share the one beer/ spirit you absolutely have to try Steamworks Brewing Co.

Always useful for festivals.

10. Do not drink any pre-fest booze

Slam Dunkel

11. Bring either a pencil and notepad or a fully-charged phone

“We just brought that back on tap, we won a gold medal for it in 2013 at the Great American Beer Festival. It’s a style I feel like a lot of breweries don’t make; a dark wheat beer that has a lot of banana notes and brown sugar and spice.”

You might want to write down the beers you really love. Don’t assume you’ll remember them later. You might hopefully leave with a few new favorites.

Animas Brewing Co.

One pint is equal to three or four delicious festival samples. Save room.

Gose

12. Wear dark colors You will probably get tipsy and spill beer or foodstuffs down yourself at some point, but dark clothes will hide those humiliating stains.

13. Be prepared for weather We’re in monsoon season, so wear shoes that are good for slipping on wet grass, bring an umbrella or a waterproof jacket, and wear waterproof mascara. And if it’s sunny – put on sunscreen.

“It’s a cross between German-style unfiltered wheat and a sour. So it’s a tart, wheat beer.”

BREW Pub and Kitchen Zen “It’s a simple session ale that has cucumbers, Thai basil and lemons.”

14. Prepare for porta-potties

Ska Brewery

You’ll probably be peeing a lot, so bring some pocket hand sanitizer or tissues. Who knows what the porta-potty situation will be like (sometimes they run out of TP)?

There are no true public restrooms around, but if you need a “break” from the beer fest, there’s some delicious sandwiches at nearby Jimmy John’s and great pick-me-up coffee right down 12th at Durango Joe’s. ;)

Motis Mandarina

15. Bring a cup-holder

Mayday Moonshine Lemonade

You’ll want something to hold your serving glass if you go to the bathroom or if your hands get tied up. You only get one cup! Wear a purse, a man purse (murse), a fanny pack or pants with roomy pockets.

“Incredibly smooth, full of flavor and makes a great variety of cocktails.”

16. Get crafty and make your own pretzel necklace (a beer fest staple).

You’ll just need string and some pretzels. It’s not a stylish accessory, but it is practical – the adult version of candy necklaces. Pretzels are the perfect complement to beer and the necklace is a built-in, hands-free reminder to eat as much as you drink throughout the day.

17. Stand in line strategically Says Sean: “For the breweries with a really strong following in Colorado, especially Crooked Stave (Denver) and Melvin’s (Alpine, Wyoming), you want to try and get to those as early as you can. By the middle of the fest, the lines get really long and they run out of beer. So find the ones you’re really a fan of, and go there first.”

“A twist on Modus Hoperandi, a citrus IPA with Mandarina Bavaria hops and sweet orange peels.”

Durango Craft Spirits

Carver Brewing Co. Twin Beard Double Red Ale “In honor of red-bearded brewers Cody and Patrick, justtapped Twin Beard Double Red Ale. Rich, high alcohol American-style double red ale, hop forward with toffee and caramel flavors. Also very limited amount of first batch of nitrogenated, cold-pressed Desert Sun coffee. Single-origin Guatemalan bean from the Quiche region. Look for varying cold-pressed roasts available on nitro tap at Carvers beginning this week.”

—— Anya Jaremko-Greenwold

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[Serving] Confessions of a 20-something waitress Taylor Ferraro

The virtual waiter will be taking care of you ... right?

Taylor Ferraro provides five-star service and entertainment at the Red Snapper.

She is also a massage therapist and KDUR DJ. Contact her at tferr8@hotmail.com.

R M E D C

t t Ou Nigh ial Spec 10% Save from m 9:45p 7:45-

TAKING YOU HIGHER THAN THE CLOUDS!

10% OFF

E. SEcond AvE. SteamworkS

N

AllEy GraSSburGer DuranGo Coffee Co.

MAin AvE.

E. 7th St.

Why sit somewhere strange with a computer and a bowl of pasta when you could order the meal to-go and enjoy it on a familiar couch at home?

This tech trend hit multiple Applebee’s restaurants in 2014. To put it into perspective, more than 100,000 of these robot waiters were installed. In a press release, Mike Archer, Applebee’s president said, “Let’s face it, everyone who has ever been to a restaurant has been frustrated by waiting for their check.” So basically, these computers were installed because of Americans’ expanding stomachs, shortened attention spans and impatient wallets?

Tablet service is starting to sound like a gateway to unemployment for industry workers and a future of uneventful dining experiences.

So the question remains: Do these computers work efficiently enough to replace waiter and waitress positions?

In my opinion, the answer is a firm “no.” No matter how easy and efficient the computer makes the dining experience, a real-live person will always trump tablet service. Remember when Siri was first introduced to the Apple world and was talked up to be this helpful robot? Well, we can have technology complete these tasks for us but there will always be a glitch.

How many times have you asked this helpful robot to “call Mom” only to get “I’m sorry, can you repeat that” as your answer?

Cutting out the middleman will not alleviate errors. It may even make things more hectic. Computers glitch and people make mistakes. But people can learn from their mistakes, computers, not so much. Don’t allow a rechargeable device to stand in for your human. Keep in mind that nothing will ever be perfect, and it is important to keep human interaction alive in all workplaces.

E. 8th St.

A

dmit it, we have all been to an Olive Garden, Applebee’s or even Chili’s and ordered a generic appetizer from the third-generation tablet on the table. My first encounter with the virtual waiter at Olive Garden left me thinking that it was a futuristic, smart way to make table service more efficient. After selecting “classic calamari” and then pressing the all-too-familiar “order” button, it hit me: These tablets were slowly taking over my career. My feelings? First shocked (that I had used the enemy). Second, frightened.

Will computers one day take over my current job ... and the world?

This uncontrollable downward spiral of thoughts kept my mind occupied while I ate what must have been my fifth bowl of Olive Garden salad ... also uncontrollable. When my portabella mushroom raviolis came out from the kitchen, hand-delivered by a PERSON, I was quickly soothed.

Part of me was expecting the food to rise from the center of the table on a conveyer belt. Maybe all of that worry was because I had low blood sugar, but still, computers are starting to freak me out.

However, I don’t think tablet service will ever replace your waiter or waitress, at least in small-town Durango. Here’s why: I understand why it makes sense to take out the middleman (server) in the restaurant world. It would dissolve the tipping system, which means at least a 15 to 20 percent discount on every meal and it would leave little room for error. It would essentially make every sit-in restaurant a glorified Sonic.

You could order, eat, play games, pay and leave whenever you wanted to, all without any human interaction.

Ah, wouldn’t that be nice? Hopefully, you said no. The whole point of eating out is to have the full dining experience, human service intact. Taking the human out of this position would essentially make dining out pointless.

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[movies] Don’t Breathe Playing at Stadium 9 Rating: R Genre: Horror,

mystery & suspense Directed by:

Fede Alvarez

Why film studios like movie remakes

By Jacob Bogage © 2016, THE WASHINGTON POST

Written by:

Fede Alvarez, Rodo Sayagues Runtime: 1 hr. 28 min.

Rotten Tomatoes Tomatometer: 90% Synopsis: Rocky (Jane Levy), Alex

and Money are three Detroit thieves who get their kicks by breaking into the houses of wealthy people. Money gets word about a blind veteran who won a major cash settlement after the death of his only child.

Figuring he’s an easy target, the trio invades the man’s secluded home in an abandoned neighborhood.

Finding themselves trapped inside, the young intruders must fight for their lives after making a shocking discovery about their supposedly helpless victim.

Mechanic: Resurrection Playing at Stadium 9 Rating: R Genre: Action

& adventure, mystery & suspense Directed by:

Dennis Gansel Written by: Philip Shelby, Tony

Mosher Runtime: 1 hr. 50 min.

Rotten Tomatoes Tomatometer: Not available Synopsis: Arthur Bishop (Jason

Statham) returns as the Mechanic in the sequel to the 2011 action thriller. When the deceitful actions of a cunning but beautiful woman (Jessica Alba) force him to return to the life he left behind, Bishop’s life is once again in danger as he has to complete an impossible list of assassinations of the most dangerous men in the world.

After 11 Academy Awards, the 1959 swords and sandals epic “Ben-Hur” may have seemed a sure bet as a remake. But this weekend, American audiences did not respond kindly to it.

The remake starring Jack Huston and Morgan Freeman grossed $11.4 million in domestic ticket sales its opening weekend, or $4 million less than it cost to produce the film 57 years ago.

It’s another of countless movie remakes that have flopped at the box office, but studios will keep pushing them into theaters, film industry analysts say.

Other summer remakes such as “Independence Day: Resurgence,” “Ghostbusters” and “The Legend of Tarzan” have all yet to break even based on domestic ticket sales, but foreign sales should goose their earnings enough to keep producers from shying away from future remakes.

“We’re playing a global box office game now, and North America alone isn’t the say-all-end-all in the total global picture of box office sales,” said Daniel Loria, editorial director of Boxoffice Media. “Many times what will decide if a sequel happens if a film flops in North America is how strong it does overseas.”

The North American market makes up only about a third of global box office revenue, according to industry estimates. It’s still the world’s largest film market, but by no means the ultimate arbiter of ticket sales success.

“Independence Day: Resurgence,” for example, did $383 million in worldwide sales. More than $280 million of those sales came in foreign markets, $75 million of which came from China and another $6 million from Russia.

The 1996 version of the film was not screened in those countries.

Less than 20 percent of “Ghostbusters’” revenue came from foreign viewers in 1984. More than 40 percent of the 2016 version’s ticket sales have been foreign and $6 million of those sales came from Russia. Neither version of the film was screened in China.

Philippe Antonello/Paramount Pictures via AP

»» Jack Huston as Judah Ben-Hur, left, and Toby Kebbell as Messala Severus in a scene from “Ben-Hur.” Hollywood’s blockbuster machine has frequently stalled and sputtered this summer, leaving behind a steady trail of misbegotten reboots, ill-conceived sequels and questionable remakes. Last weekend’s dismal opening of the big-budget “Ben-Hur” may have cost Paramount $100 million and could signal an end to the resurrection of the Bible epic.

Remakes that might seem stale in North America are fresh to audiences in other countries that haven’t seen the original.

Domestically, remakes are known entities. They have inborn marketing advantages, and what’s more, they’re relatively cheap, analysts say. You don’t have to pay a team of writers to start from scratch if you’re working on yet another version of “Spider-Man.” “There is a reference point. There is a concept already built in,” said Paul Dergarabedian, senior media analyst at market research firm comScore.

“There is a way to describe the movie very quickly, and that is the easy allure of a remake. That’s why a lot of sequels get greenlit as well. On paper at least, you’re kinda ahead of the game theoretically.”

But that doesn’t mean they always work. Studios pick remakes because the original movie brands are popular.

What if a new version feels phony to dedicated followers? There’s a lot of room to screw up films some people consider iconic.

Studios walk a fine line, analysts say, between enticing viewers with

something they haven’t seen before and ruining the nostalgia that keeps certain film franchises alive.

The perfect example: “Jurassic World,” though film aficionados often go to the mat over whether the film is truly a remake.

The 2015 thriller did $1.67 billion in ticket sales and spawned a new hype for toys, T-shirts and Chris Pratt action figures. It did so well, Universal Pictures has a sequel planned for summer 2018. And if that does well, analysts say, there could be a third movie.

Think about it this way: A second and third film based on a remake of a 20-year-old movie property exist based on the success of an existing brand.

They’ll all do well at the box office because of that brand and will displace other movies that may have been made because of that brand.

Film studios look at that formula, and make up their minds pretty quickly that remakes are smart business, said Bruce Nash, founder and publisher of The Numbers, a box office tracking and film industry analysis website.

16 | Thursday, August 25, 18, 2016 2016 • • •••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

[pages] Check this out The Drifter, by Nicholas Petrie If you’re a big Jack Reacher fan, and have read all of Lee Childs’ catalog, I have a new hero for you to discover.

Downtown 11th & Main

Peter Ash, like Reacher, has a military background, a veteran of the Iran and Afghanistan wars. In Peter’s case, the PTSD volume is ratcheted way up. Peter has severe claustrophobia and can’t handle being indoors for even a short period of time.

Fresh &

This book is definitely a page-turner. I recommend not starting it before bed, as the story could end up carrying you through into the wee hours of the morning.

Nicholas Petrie has done a fine job with this debut novel, and I’ll look forward to more Peter Ash thrillers to come.

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The opening sequence of Nicholas Petrie’s “The Drifter” makes it difficult to resist reading further. Peter is about to begin repairing a dilapidated porch for the widow of his Marine buddy, who apparently committed suicide. But first, he has to deal with what’s under the porch – the biggest, meanest and smelliest dog he has ever seen. And an old suitcase full of cash. The discovery of these, and their removal from under the porch, sets the tone for the rest of the book. Criminals and terrorists abound, along with well-intentioned Samaritans.

Many of Petrie’s cleverly-complex characters could most likely hold the plot of a book on their own, but play second fiddle to the intricacies of Peter Ash.

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[ weed ] Seeing Through the Smoke Christopher Gallagher

Here’s why right now, today, is a Golden Age of cannabis

W

e spend moments inside our heads marking time. We think, reflect, organize, remember, prepare. Stargazers tilted back their heads en masse and looked toward the heavens to see the Perseid meteor shower earlier this month. Football fans who have marked the days since the Broncs hoisted the Lombardi Trophy can ramp up again as the heroes of fall return to Dove Valley for training camp. Lovers of the Canada Goose know that their honking return will arrive as September rolls around. And anybody who has given their heart to Mary Jane knows that this time, right now, today, is a Golden Age for us.

We can look to November 5, 1996, the day of the passage of California’s Proposition 215, the referendum that created the United States’ first medical marijuana program. Alaska, Oregon and Washington followed suit in 1998, Maine in ’99, and Colorado and Nevada joined the ranks as the millennium turned. In October 2003, the United States Department of Health and Human Services was granted patent No. 6,630,507 for “cannabinoids as antioxidants and neuroprotectants.”

Now we’re getting somewhere, huh? The expansion of medical marijuana programs has now grown to include 25 states with full programs and an additional 16 with CBD-specific programs.

Several (at least three and possibly up to five) states will vote in this fall’s election to decide on medical programs.

The 2010s might rightly be called the Era of Recreational Legalization – Washington and Colorado in 2012, Alaska and Oregon in 2014, and this November, Arizona, California, Maine, Massachusetts and Nevada residents will vote on ballot initiatives to enact recreational programs.

Washington, D.C., also (kinda sorta) allows for

legal recreational use (but we don’t have time to get into that right now).

But it’s not all good news all the time.

The DEA denied three petitions to reschedule cannabis from Schedule I (no accepted medical use/high potential for abuse) just last week, but even that bad news is not all bad news.

The public reaction has been – let’s call it – less than favorable. In this age of rapidly-transmitted information and widely-ranging sources, the usual cannabis advocates have had a field day pointing out the wide margin by which that decision diverges from the perception of today’s American public and the mounting scientific evidence that says otherwise.

But it hasn’t only been stereotypical marijuana supporters who have recognized the ridiculous position taken by the feds.

News anchor Shepard Smith took a potshot at the DEA from in front of the Fox News cameras, of all places, pointing out the absurdity of classifying “LSD, MDMA and a plant that grows in the yard – all one thing.”

More good news: on Aug. 16, the 9th

U.S. Circuit Court of Appeals ruled that, in light of a 2014 Congressional decision to defund Department of Justice prosecutions involving defendants who have not broken the laws of their state’s medical marijuana programs, the cases of 10 individuals from California and Washington will be sent back to lower courts to be reviewed and possibly dismissed. Big things are afoot.

There’s not much to overthink here; the porridge is in the pot and the pot will get you high, high, hiiiiiiigh. My advice: run down to the Weede Shoppe and grab an eighth of your favorite, light it up, pause for a moment, breathe in deeply, breathe it all in – this time, this place, this rising culture; exhale, repeat.

Christopher Gallagher lives with his wife and their four dogs and two horses. Life is pretty darn good. Contact him at chrstphrgallagher@gmail.com Illustration by David Holub/DGO; image via Assoaciated Press

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18 | Thursday, August 25, 2016 • • •••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

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Judd Apatow movies Judd Apatow likes to make movies about smokin’ herb, and I respect that. But his films are problematic gender-wise, and sexism surfaces in the unexpected activity of cannabis consumption.

Take “Knocked Up,” for example: Ben (Seth Rogen) is a slacker stoner who lives with a bunch of dudes in a messy house, while Alison (Katharine Heigl) is a responsible, presentable entertainment journalist. Ben and his buds get high and watch movies all day (they’re unemployed, but starting a website called Flesh of the Stars citing the time stamps of celebrity movie nudity), but Alison and her sister Debbie (Leslie Mann) are sullen, judgmental and disapproving of Ben’s lifestyle, weed use and general identity.

Debbie’s husband Pete (Paul Rudd) is laid back like Ben, and clearly his children prefer him to mom.

In Apatow’s world, men are lethargic babies and women are ticked off adults who must help them grow up. Heigl famously told Vanity Fair “Knocked Up” was a bit sexist: “It paints the women as shrews, as humorless and uptight, and it paints the men as lovable, goofy, fun-loving guys ... I had a hard time with it. I’m playing such a bitch; why is she being such a killjoy?”

Heigl paid dearly for these comments later, as they contributed to her negative public image. The media labeled Heigl a “diva” and “difficult to work with.” You’re not supposed to bad mouth a film you’ve starred in, especially if it succeeded at the

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The majority of Apatow females are uptight, never natural comedians like the guys are (“40 Year Old Virgin,” “This is 40,” “Funny People.”) The director rectified this somewhat with “Trainwreck” (starring Amy Schumer) and “Bridesmaids” (he was a producer, though didn’t direct). Still, in “Bridesmaids,” Kristen Wiig takes drugs (someone else’s prescription pills) only because she’s afraid of flying, not to intentionally have a good time. There are few to zero scenes of women having reckless fun together away from men in any of these films. And that’s fine – Apatow is king of the bromance. Schumer at least drinks copiously and smokes weed in “Trainwreck,” but it’s more sad than silly. When she finally meets a nice man and settles down, she throws all her illicit substances away.

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This kind of gender assignment isn’t fair to either sex. Plenty of men are mature and responsible, and lots of women are sloppy and ill-equipped (or unwilling) to start a family. The plot of “Knocked Up” is particularly nutty – who decides to have a kid with a one-night stand?! The conceit is funny – don’t get me wrong – but no one should raise a baby with a stranger.

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SILVERTON

[love and sex]

Savage Love | Daniel Savage

He’s real nice, but nothing’s happening down there. Dump him?

DEAR READERS: This is the final week of my summer vacation – but you’ve been getting a new column every week I’ve been gone, all of them written by Dan Savage, none of them written by me.

Our final guest Dan Savage is an independent designer, illustrator, and animation director based in Brooklyn, New York. He created Yule Log 2.0 (watchyulelog.com), a collaborative art project where animators around the world reimagine the famous Yule log fireplace. He has worked with the New York Times, Herman Miller, and Google, he’s taught design and animation at NYU and SVA, and he’s won a bunch of design industry awards you probably haven’t heard of.

“I was excited to do this, even though I have no authority on the topic,” said Daniel Savage, award-winning independent designer. “But I surprisingly felt pretty confident in my answers, as ridiculous as they may be.”

I’m a 41-year-old straight woman who stayed a virgin way longer than I should have (thank you, church and cultural slut shaming). I wasn’t 100 percent “good,” i.e., I was one of those “not PIV = not really sex” girls, so I indulged in outercourse and other “cheats.” When I finally realized that “not until marriage” wasn’t working for me and did the real thing, I discovered I loved it. Go me, right? Unfortunately, I’m not good at dating, so I usually go a long time between relationships. The relationship I’m in now is the first one I’ve had in two years. “Guy” is nice to me – calls me beautiful, sticks up for me, comes to watch me play with a community orchestra (my own family and friends don’t even come to my shows). But we don’t have much in common (hobbies, political outlook, religious beliefs) and sometimes our conversations feel labored. But that’s OK, right? At least I’m getting my sexual needs met, right? Well, no. Every single time we’ve tried to have sex, Guy either can’t get hard or stays hard for only a few minutes. I’ve tried going down on him, using my hands, different positions – nothing works. He’s never had an orgasm with me. We don’t even kiss that much. I don’t say anything because I don’t want to hurt his feelings and because I’m really grateful to him for wanting to be with me and being nice to me. He says sorry and that he’s asked the doctor about it, but we don’t get anywhere. It feels lonelier than

when I was single. To be blunt, I don’t want to date him anymore. But I feel too guilty to break up with him. He really cares about me, and he didn’t do anything wrong. We’ve dated for four months, and I don’t know if I’m giving up too soon. Where would I be if previous boyfriends had ditched me for being inexperienced instead of showing me the ropes? Don’t I owe Guy the same thing?

Too Down To Be Witty First off, I think a long time between relationships is good. I also think not having things in common can be OK if you create new hobbies and experiences you can share. Having said that, TDTBW, four months is plenty of time to know if it’s working. He sounds super boring. The sooner you break it off with him the better. You don’t want to hurt him any more than you have to, especially if he’s really into you, and the longer you draw it out, the more it’s going to hurt. No amount of “training” is going to get this dude hard. The only rope being shown here is his flaccid ding-dong. It doesn’t seem like you even want to be his friend if you broke up.

I wouldn’t feel guilty at all about dumping him.

Sometimes you gotta think about number one.

My girl and I are both 26, and we opened up our marriage. Now I’ve got a girlfriend with whom I am getting to have some of the kinky fun that was lacking at home. Here is my question: Things are really casual between me and this new girl. I want to do some pegging, but I don’t know who should buy the strap-on? Me, because it’s my ass and my idea? Or her, because she would wear it and would also think it was super hot? Should I buy the dildo and she buys the harness? Going halfsies on the whole rig? What is the equitable way of doing this?

Purchasing Erotic Gear Good Etiquette, Dan? You’re 26 years old, PEGGED, buy the damn thing. How much could it possibly cost? I know if I were in your situation, I would want full control over what goes up my ass. If she owns it, would she use it while you weren’t around? With strangers?

No thanks. Plus if you split the cost, who gets to

keep it when you break up? Just buy it and enjoy.

If you struggle with picking it out, might I suggest starting small?

I’ve always enjoyed reading your column – maybe I just get turned on by other people’s sexual endeavors or maybe reading about other people’s sexual frustrations makes my situation seem better in comparison. So what am I writing about? Well, I suppose the question is this: When does one just become blatantly ungrateful? I’ve been in a two-year mixed relationship (she’s Native and 24, I’m white and 29), and we fight a lot. She cheated on me a couple times early in the relationship.

She says I pressured her into getting into a relationship when she wasn’t ready to “settle down,” which I suppose I could see. My problem is I have a handjob fetish and my girlfriend has a disinterest in it, to the point where she just won’t do it. But why am I bitching? I get laid every day for the most part, surprise blowjobs, 69ing, you name it. Should I accept this as fate? But just this morning, we went for round two, and I was having a hard time coming, and out of nowhere she pops up and jerks me off till climax. It really took me back. Would it be bad to fake having coming issues in hopes she does it again? Is that unfair?

Tugboat Captain It’s interesting that your problem isn’t the fact that she cheated on you, TG, or the relationship problems, or the constant fighting. No, it’s the lack of handjob enthusiasm. Honestly, man, it seems like you have much deeper issues here – but the handjob problem is the only concrete thing you point to?

The girlfriend you’ve got sounds super selfish, and finding a new girl – one who wouldn’t cheat on you and would be excited to jump into a relationship AND be down with a little tug – isn’t going to be that difficult of a task. I mean, your fetish seems like it’s an easy one to explore.

But to answer your actual question: I would go ahead and fake it. [Bleep] it, lie to her. It seems like she has no issues lying to you!

Follow Daniel Savage on Twitter at @somethingsavage and visit his website at somethingsavage.com.

20 | Thursday, August 25, 2016 • • •••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

[happening] New show is for the animals at Studio & Studio & is opening a new show this weekend. “A World Apart: New Paintings from Elizabeth Kinahan,” besides offering cool artwork, it’s helping animals as well.

In Kinahan’s newest work, she continues to explore local animals, primarily agricultural animals. She’ll be showing a year of new paintings, which includes portraits of donkeys, sheep, cattle and goats.

And the cool thing about this show is that the work will again serve as a way to support animal-rescue efforts, with a portion of all sales being donated to Peaceful Prairie Sanctuary in Deer Trail.

Courtesy of Studio & There will be an opening reception from 5 to 9 p.m. Friday at the gallery, 1027 Main Ave. The exhibit will run through Sept. 4.

Thursday Stillwater Performers, 11:30 a.m.-1 p.m.,

Thursday Acoustic Lunches series, Smiley Cafe, 1309 East Third Ave., 426-8340.

Blossoms galore watercolor art show, lunch and dinner, featuring Veryl

Nadya Rosenbaum, The Farm Bistro, 34 West Main St., Cortez, 565-3834.

Line dancing, 1:30-4 p.m., Durango/La

Karaoke, 9 p.m., 8th Avenue Tavern, 509

East Eighth Ave., 259-8801.

Nina Sasaki & Dave Rust, 7-10 p.m.,

Plate, 42 County Road 250, #400 (off Florida Road).

Friday Durango Nature Studies’ Summer’s End Music Festival, 5-8:30 p.m., Rotary

Plata Senior Center, 2424 Main Ave., 3826428.

Park, 1565 East 2nd Ave., 769-1800, www.durangonaturestudies.org.

Burger & Band Night w/Daphne Willis & Hailey Steele, 5-8 p.m., James Ranch

Lacey Black, 5 p.m., Serious Texas Bar-B-Q

Terraces, 33846 U.S. Highway 550, www.haileysteele.com.

Open mic, 7-11 p.m., Steaming Bean, locat-

The Lisa Blue Trio, 5:30-8:30 p.m., Animas

River Café at the DoubleTree Hotel.

South, 650 Camino del Rio. ed downstairs at the Irish Embassy Pub, 900 Main Ave., 403-1200, theirishembassypub. com.

Ska-BQ with Ruckus & the Rice Patties, 5-7 p.m., Ska Brewing Co., 225 Girard

The Kirk James Band, 7 p.m., Moe’s Star-

Street.

Fool for Love, 7:30 p.m., Durango Arts Cen-

Eric DiBardino & Friends, 5 - 9 p.m.,

ter, 802 East Second Ave., http://durangoarts. org/fool-for-love.

Balcony Bar & Grill, 600 Main Ave.

light Lounge, 937 Main Ave.

589 County Road 252, www.kirkjames.com.

CarverFest with Larry Carver, 8 p.m., free, Derailed Pour House, 725 Main Ave.

Open Mic Night, 8 p.m., Balcony Back-

Karaoke, 8 p.m., 8th Avenue Tavern, 509

Kirk James, 6-8 p.m., Dalton Ranch Patio,

stage, 600 Main Ave., Suite 205.

East Eighth Ave., 259-8801.

Karaoke with DJ Crazy Charlie, 9 p.m.,

Outdoor Movie Night:“The Good Dinosaur,” 8:30-10:30 p.m., Three Springs, 125

Wild Horse Saloon, 601 East Second Ave., 3752568.

Mercado Street.

Saturday San Juan Brewfest, 1-5 p.m., Buckley Park,

1200 Main Ave., http://sanjuanbrewfest.com.

Henry Stoy, piano, 10 a.m.-1 p.m., Jean-

Pierre Bakery, 601 Main Ave., 385-0122.

Roller Derby, Durango Roller Girls vs. Fort

Collins, 6-9 p.m., Chapman Hill Ice Arena & Ski Area, 500 Florida Road, www.brownpapertickets.com/event/2589090.

The Black Velvet Duo, 5-9 p.m., Animas

Irish music jam session, 12:30 p.m.,

Irish Embassy Pub, 900 Main Ave., 403-1200, www.theirishembassypub.com.

Kirk James Band, 2 p.m., live blues at Vallecito Lake, Hideaway Grill, 18044 County Road 501, Bayfield.

Fool for Love, 2 p.m., Durango Arts Center, 802 East Second Ave., http://durangoarts.org/ fool-for-love.

Art & Affirmations Party, 3:30-5:30 p.m.,

River Café in the DoubleTree Hotel.

Peg McMahan’s Office, 777 Main Ave. #205, http://peggymcmahan.com.

Fool for Love, 7:30 p.m., Durango Arts Center, 802 East Second Ave., http://durangoarts. org/fool-for-love.

Jazz church (experienced musician drop-in session), 6 p.m., Derailed Pour

Karaoke, 8 p.m., 8th Avenue Tavern, 509

House, 725 Main Ave., 247-5440, www.derailedpourhouse.com.

East Eighth Ave., 259-8801.

Karaoke, 8 p.m., 8th Avenue Tavern, 509

The Cannondolls EP Release MiniFest w/ Daphne Willis & Hailey Steele,

East Eighth Ave., 259-8801.

4-7 p.m., Rochester Courtyard, 726 East Second Ave., www.cannondolls.com.

The Cannondolls EP Release MiniFest w/ Farmington Hill And Andy Rok & The Real Deal, 9 p.m.-midnight, An-

imas City Theatre, 128 E. College Drive, http:// www.animascitytheatre.com.

Sunday Henry Stoy, piano, 10 a.m.-1 p.m., Jean-

Pierre Bakery, 601 Main Ave., 385-0122.

Monday Four Corners Arts Forum, 9 a.m., KDUR

91.9/93.9 FM, www.kdur.org.

Happy Hour Yoga, 5:30-6:30 p.m., Ska

Brewing Co., 225 Girard St., yoga and a pint of beer for $10, www.skabrewing.com.

Spoken Word, 7-9 p.m., Steaming Bean, located downstairs at the Irish Embassy Pub, 900 Main Ave., 403-1200, theirishembassypub.com.

Continued on Page 22

���������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������� Thursday, August 25, 2016 | 21

[happening]

Where should we

DGO tonight?

Courtesy of Running Out of Road

»» Running Out of Road will be playing at Summer’s End Music Festival, a benefit for Durango Nature Studies.

Celebrate summer’s end with Durango Nature Studies The music doesn’t have to end just because summer’s winding down. Durango Nature Studies will be holding its Summer’s End Music Festival from 5:30 to 9 p.m. Friday at Rotary Park in Durango.

This is DNS’ seventh annual bluegrass fundraiser, featuring live music from The Assortment, The PG Band and Running Out of Road.

Cost is $7 per person in advance at Maria’s Bookshop or $10 at the event. Kids 6 and younger get in free.

Beer, root beer and brats will be available at the event to benefit Durango Nature Studies.

For more information, check out www.durangonaturestudies.org/ bluegrass.htm.

From Page 21

Your #1 source for what’s going on around Durango dgomag.com/calendar

Tuesday Open Mic Night, 8 p.m., Moe’s, 937 Main

Ave., 259-9018.

Pingpong and poker tournament, 8

p.m., Moe’s, 937 Main Ave., 259-9018.

Karaoke with DJ Crazy Charlie, 9 p.m.,

Wild Horse Saloon, 601 East Second Ave., 3752568.

Wine Tasting, 4:30-6 p.m., Mac’s Liquors., 3124 Main Ave., 247-0939.

Submissions

5-7:30 p.m., Rochester Hotel Secret Garden, 726 East Second Ave. Bluegrass Jam, 6-9 p.m., Irish Embassy Pub, 900 Main Ave., 403-1200, theirishembassypub.com.

Two-step and waltz dance lessons,

to the DGO calendar with

Pub quiz, 6:30 p.m., Irish Embassy Pub, 900 Main Ave., 403-1200.

Wednesday Community Concerts in the Secret Garden featuring Kirk James Blues,

+ Add an Event

259-5959.

6:30-7:30 p.m., $10, Wild Horse Saloon, 601 East Second Ave., 799-8832.

Geeks Who Drink trivia, 8:30 p.m.,

BREW Pub & Kitchen, 117 W. College Drive,

To submit listings for publication in DGO and dgomag.com, go to www.swscene. com and click “Add Your Event,” fill out the form with all your event info and submit.

Listings at swscene.com will appear both at dgomag.com and in our weekly print edition. Posting events at swscene.com is free and takes about one business day to process.

22 | Thursday, August 25, 2016 • • •••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

Horoscope ARIES (March 21 to April 19) Steer clear of controversial issues such as politics, religion and racial matters because there is too much confusion.

Even when it comes to travel plans, you might be indecisive.

TAURUS (April 20 to May 20) This is a poor week to make important decisions about inheritances and shared property. An element of confusion, even deceit, is present. Plus, you might not be strong enough to defend your own best interests.

GEMINI (May 21 to June 20) It’s hard to stand up to others, even to defend yourself. Fortunately, other people may have the same difficulty!

It’s definitely a wishy-washy week.

CANCER (June 21 to July 22)

Bizarro

Your efforts to get things done at work

will be challenged by confusion regarding travel, foreign countries and the timing of when things should be done.

Good luck!

LEO (July 23 to Aug. 22) Be careful with social plans or plans regarding vacations. Leave yourself a loophole in case you have to change things. Similarly, choose less-ambitious projects when dealing with children.

VIRGO (Aug. 23 to Sept. 22) Postpone important decisions about family or real estate situations because there is too much confusion. People are indecisive.

It’s hard to know what to do.

LIBRA (Sept. 23 to Oct. 22) This is one of those weeks where you’re not sure when or how to act. That’s why it might be best to just do nothing. Easy does it.

SCORPIO (Oct. 23 to Nov. 21)

Go slowly.

Be careful with financial arrangements and how you handle your money. Assume nothing. Take nothing for granted. Guard your possessions.

PISCES (Feb. 19 to March 20)

SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22 to Dec. 21) You might feel tired this week. This is not a good one to tax yourself or to push your energy too far. Just take care of smaller matters.

CAPRICORN (Dec. 22 to Jan. 19) Secrets might come out. Or perhaps you are involved with secret activities. Be careful and commit to nothing, to be on the safe side.

AQUARIUS (Jan. 20 to Feb. 18) Your efforts to lead others might be impeded by something. Don’t expect too much from anyone (including yourself).

Check things out, especially instructions from bosses and authority figures, before you act. It’s all too easy to go off in a wrong direction. If you are smart, you can save wasted effort and possible mistakes.

BORN THIS WEEK You have common sense. You are a loyal friend who is reliable. You have an intellectual mind and creative abilities. This year something you’ve been involved with for about nine years will end in order to make room for something new. Although this is a year of service to others, it is also a great year to travel. Get ready for a fresh, new cycle! © 2016 King Features Syndicate Inc.

[best of twitter] God *giggling*: They are gonna be so tiny. / Angel *writing*: ants... tiny... got it. / God *suddenly tearing up*: but omg so strong.

Spacegirl Incognito @iamspacegirl

Donald Trump asking about nuclear weapons is the biggest red flag since Voldemort asked about Horcruxes as a teenager at Hogwarts.

Jamie Woodham @jwoodham

My band is so indie we don’t even record together. You have to buy 4 separate cds and play them at the same time.

Mike Bianchi @mike_bianchi

the worst part about drums is that if you are angry at them you can’t hit them because that’s what they want.

Local Badboy @hippieswordfish ���������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������� Thursday, August 25, 2016 | 23

THREE DAYS, TONS OF FUN AND

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Y A B D I K R E GIVEAWAY O B A L 6 1 0 2

HARLEY-DAVIDSON ROAD KING

FRIDAY, SEPTEMBER 2

Earn entry tickets August 21 thru September 2, when you play the slots with your Bear Club Card. Earn Bonus entries when you play 777 on Tuesday, August 30, and the Motorcycle Revealer Kiosk game on Thursday, September 1.

Finalist drawings Friday, September 2, every hour from 5PM-9PM. Grand Prize drawing at 9:15PM. Runners up will each receive cash prizes ranging from $250 – $1,000.

SATURDAY, SEPTEMBER 3 Indian Scout

Harley-Davidson Road King

INDIAN SCOUT Earn entry tickets Friday, September 2 and Saturday, September 3 when you play the slots with your Bear Club Card.

Grand Prize drawing will be held at 9PM on Saturday, September 3.

INDIAN CHIEFTAN DARK HORSE Earn entry tickets Friday, September 2 thru Sunday, September 4, when you play the slots with your Bear Club Card. Grand Prize drawing will be held at 9PM on Sunday, September 4.

Owned & operated by the Southern Ute Indian Tribe

★

SKYUTECASINO.COM 888.842.4180 IGNACIO, COLORADO

SUNDAY, SEPTEMBER 4 Indian Chieftan Dark Horse

Actual motorcycles not shown. Rules apply. See Players’ Club for details.