Stormtrooper About Town

art entertainment food drink music nightlife Thursday, August 18, 2016

DGO

FREE!

STORMTROOPER

ABOUT TOWN

Durango photographer Hank Blum acquired the costume through a bet. Now you can find him in the most unexpected places.

INSIDE!

»» Schedule/map »» Jesse Ogle’s rundown of performers

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DGO Magazine

STAFF

What’s inside Volume 1 Number 42

August 18, 2016

Chief Executive Officer

10 The Stormtrooper speaks

Douglas Bennett V.P. of Finance and Operations

You might have seen a rogue Stormtrooper wandering around Durango. That’s Hank Blum (above), self-taught photographer and “Star Wars” enthusiast, who regularly photographs himself in the costume exploring the La Plata Mountains.

Bob Ganley V.P. of Advertising David Habrat V.P. of Marketing Kricket Lewis Founding Editors Amy Maestas David Holub Editor/ designer/ art director

14 iAM MUSIC fest takes

Durango by storm

dholub@bcimedia.com 375-4551 Staff writer anya@bcimedia.com 375-4546

Courtesy of Hank Blum

6

Jim Lauderdale: A treasure for musicians, music-lovers Grammy winner Jim Lauderdale, who plays tonight (Thursday) solo at the Animas City Theatre, is a musician who aspiring songwriters and band leaders of any genre should look to.

The guy exudes cool and grace and is so adept at writing and performing.

Contributors Katie Cahill Taylor Ferraro Christopher Gallagher Bryant Liggett Jon E. Lynch Heather Narwid Cooper Stapleton Cyle Talley Robert Alan Wendeborn Advertising 247-3504 Reader Services 375-4570

DGO is a free weekly publication distributed by Ballantine Communications Inc., and is available for one copy per person. Taking more than five copies of an edition from a distribution location is illegal and is punishable by law according to Colorado Revised Statute 18-9-314.

From the Editor

4

Love it or Hate it

6

Sound

Downtown Lowdown

6

Album Review 7 8

Beer

16 Movies 17 Ornate Feelings

David Holub

Anya Jaremko-Greenwold

4

9

18 Weed

The second annual iAM MUSIC Fest isn’t about securing world-famous big name acts like Pearl Jam (who headlined Ride in Telluride last month). Organizer and iAM MUSIC co-founder Jesse Ogle, who gives a rundown of each performer in the fest, compares it to an indie film festival with low-budget, high-quality passion projects.

Review 19

Tell us what you think!

Got something on your mind? Have a joke or a story idea or just something that the world needs to know?

Send everything to editor@dgomag.com

Netflix and chill ‑ 420 edition 19

20 Savage Love 21 Happening 23 Horoscope/ puzzles/ Bizarro 23 Pages

A day in the life of a chef, a restaurant’s unsung hero If restaurants were a play, chefs and line cooks and should be considered the real stars of the dinner production. Server Taylor Ferraro outlines what a day in the shoes of a chef looks like.

Seeing Through the Smoke 18

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@dgo_mag

ON THE COVER Hank Blum hangs out as a Stormtrooper in the bathroom at El Moro Sprits & Tavern as part of a DGO video shoot.

David Holub/DGO

DGO Magazine is published by Ballantine Communications Inc., P.O. Drawer A, Durango, CO 81302

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[ love it or hate it ]

David Holub |DGO editor

Whales Love it

If you love music, this festival deserves your ardent support

O

K, Durango, here is our chance. When cool things get plopped into our laps, it’s up to us to support them, to devour and savor them.

Ashley Edwards and Jesse Ogle, two of the most dynamic, energetic, giving, hard-working and positive artists in Durango (along with their numerous volunteers, supporters and sponsors), have put together something remarkable. The second-annual iAM MUSIC Fest is back, and it is not to be missed. All we have to do is pony up a relatively slim sliver of cash and listen.

But why? For one, there’s nothing like it around here. Yes, there’s the Bluegrass Meltdown and Music in the Mountains, for two, both great music festivals but quite genre-specific.

The iAM fest is also DIY at its finest. It doesn’t have to exist and only does out of a labor of love. Organizing is not easy, especially with as many moving parts that go into pulling off a music festival, which includes herding more than 30 bands, musicians or acts across seven venues. It’s a testament to Ashley and Jesse, two incredibly vibrant people, who put so much of their energy into an event that enriches the community and makes this a better place to live. “(We want) to give music to the community that’s different than what you normally hear and provide something that’s real and authentic,” Jesse said. “... and trying to bring all these people together for a really affordable price.”

He’s right about that affordable price. The all-access three-day pass is $30 ($15 for Friday only, $20 for Saturday only) for up to 16 hours(!) of stellar live music is a steal. I paid $30 to hear Robert Earl Kean in Durango.

Great show, but it will certainly pale in comparison.

You don’t have to support the festival out of charity but because it’ll be a great experience. I mean, a sample of

*

For more on the iAM MUSIC Festival, see pages 12-15

the genres represented alone should do it for you: ambient cello pop, hiphop, jazz, experimental, groove, freak pop, disco, funk, Americana, reggae, Afrocuban, North Indian, avantpop, folk, roots, blues, gospel, soul, elctro-sensual rock ’n’ roll, metaphysical rock. This doesn’t even include the always-amazing Imaginario Circus, the various workshops and lectures, or Jacque the Mime miming about.

“At some point, you’re going to hear something you’ve never heard before,” Jesse said. “Would you seek that out or would you want that to come to you?”

And it’s not just about providing something amazing for Durango, but for the musicians themselves. Durango has its fair share of talented, fun bands and musicians. Not all of them are at the festival, but many are.

Two-thirds of the bands are regional and national, and the festival provides them valuable networking opportunities, something Ashley and Jesse have made sure of through the artist panel brunch and the living artist garden.

“There’s these people that we think need to be heard. It’s up to us to try to help them,” Jesse said.

If you can’t go, or if ambient cello pop, hip-hop, jazz, experimental, groove, freak pop, disco, funk, Americana, reggae, Afrocuban, North Indian, avant-pop, folk, roots, blues, gospel, soul, electro-sensual rock ’n’ roll or metaphysical rock is not your thing, do what you can to ensure folks like Ashley and Jesse can continue to spread their love and awesomeness around Durango. Write iAM a check or buy a friend a ticket to the festival. Volunteer at future iAM events.

Something.

But whatever it is, do what you can to make sure the iAM MUSIC fest and other special, unique and totally Durango events like it keep happening.

As a kid, I had a Golden Book that showed pictures of objects in scale to one another: The Eiffel Tower compared with the Statue of Liberty or the space shuttle next to an elephant or brontosaurus. But my favorite comparison was anything next to a blue whale. My young brain could not grasp a living creature so large, and my old brain still can’t. Whales ignite my imagination and intrigue unlike any other living thing.

Blue whales are as long as six elephants, three school buses or a jumbo jet. Their hearts stand as tall as a full-grown dude. I could sit around and ponder the immensity of whales for days. And there are other fascinating physical whale wonders, like the narwhal’s unicorn horn or whales’ ability to produce symphonic songs full of harmony, meter and melody.

But the thing that gets me most is their intelligence. We know they’re dauntingly intelligent, but because they’re intelligent in different ways than humans and other primates – because they can’t speak English or make and use tools with hands – their intelligence isn’t as easy to grasp.

But, whoa, is it mind-blow(hole)ing! Scientists are beginning to understand that whales can send “visual” images through sound, the equivalent of a human projecting a hologram to another human. And the part of a whale’s brain responsible for emotions and memories is more complex than ours. Whales have the ability to learn as individuals but can also pass along things they learn to other whales, something quite uncommon in the animal world.

That’s it: I’m seriously voting “whale” for president.

— David Holub

Hate it Long before I was forced to read “Moby Dick” in high school or watch Shamu perform his antics, I’ve harbored an extreme loathing for these sea mammals.

They’ve had starring roles in the Bible and “Star Trek,” but I’m still not swayed by their enormity that others proclaim as breathtaking. Whales are large, blubbery creatures with no respect for fellow sea-goers. They have no desire to share the ocean with boaters, paddle boarders or kayakers. Instead, they breach for seemingly no reason, trust-falling onto the surface of sea vessels with great spectacle.

Their showy “look at me” style screams narcissist. Many call these displays exhilarating; others call them playful and intelligent. I see dead eyes skulking below the water’s surface waiting to swallow me whole.

Whales claim to be vegetarian, opening their mouths like yawning cats to filter millions of helpless plankton for their meal, but I’m not buying it. Baleen looks more like a bunch of tiny swords crucial to spearing surfers who are in the wrong place at the wrong time. Eerie whale songs? No thanks! Ambergris?

WTF! Blowholes? More like snot holes!

My true hatred is reserved for killer whales (technically not a whale, but let’s not quibble). They don’t need to be in the ocean to be reviled! Beaching themselves to snack on a moist seal, these guys just get off on playing with their food before flopping back into the ocean. I freely admit to my pants-wetting cetaphobia, but I also believe these mammals are one of the biggest jerks in the ocean. I’m skeptical of our need to save them.

— Stephanie Gall

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COMING SEPTEMBER 10 FUN & FOOD WITH A KICK

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[sound]

Downtown Lowdown | Bryant Liggett

Jim Lauderdale: A treasure for musicians AND music-lovers

I

n 2014, singer/songwriter Jim Lauderdale released his 26th record, titled “I’m a Song.” It’s an honest admission, although he should have owned up to being many “songs.”

Productive is an understatement, as the Nashville-based songwriter has, up to this point, written thousands of tunes. He’s well known for songwriting collaborations with Robert Hunter and Buddy Miller, Ralph Stanley and Nick Lowe, yet even without those fertile partnerships, Lauderdale still ranks as one of the more prolific songwriters and performers in roots music.

He’s released 27 records since 1991, including last year’s double LP “Soul Searching.” He may have taken a year off from releasing an album here or there, but made up time by putting out multiple records in the span of 12 months.

In 2013, he released three. File it all under “roots,” as Lauderdale does country and bluegrass, folk, Memphis and blue-eyed soul with equal ease. Lauderdale will perform tonight (Thursday) solo at the Animas City Theatre. Opening the show is local country musician Tyller Gummersall.

While big record labels tend to continue to pump money into the same song and dance, people like Lauderdale keep working quietly, writing song after song while gaining the admiration of colleagues, contemporaries and fans who choose to side with someone who won’t be the flavor of the week.

He’s a musician who has had one foot firmly planted in the mainstream, a sought after songwriter whose words have led to hits for major league musicians. The other foot has been on the ground in independent music, allowing him freedom to play bluegrass or rock while writing with musicians known in new-wave or hippie realms.

“I had that mixture of things for a long time, since as a teenager trying to get record deals, and through and

Courtesy of The Press House

»» Jim Lauderdale

If you go Thursday: Americana with Grammy winner Jim Lauderdale, and Tyller Gummersall. 7:45 p.m. Animas City Theatre, 128 E. College Drive. $15. Information: 799-2281.

after college. I really love to do so many different kinds of music. I had a few mainstream country deals ,but I was always a little bit out of sync. I was a little bit too country or whatever and so it didn’t take off for me,” said Lauderdale. “But luckily, different people – George Straight, especially – started recording my songs, and that allowed me to do whatever I wanted to do musically.”

He’s a musician who aspiring songwriters and band leaders of any genre should look to. The guy exudes cool and grace; from the Nudie Suits to the bluegrass, soul and cosmic country, he’s so adept at writing and performing. As influential as he is, he’s still a diehard fan, taken with music now as much as he was when he first heard The Beatles. He writes with Robert Hunter, but before that, Hunter’s songs on Grateful Dead records were a soundtrack to his life.

He wrote a record with Nick Lowe, but that came long after being a fan of the man who penned “(What’s So Funny) about Peace, Love and Understanding.” His air and excitement about music, whether he’s

talking songwriting, collaborations with other musicians or elaborating on Grateful Dead albums released between 1970 and 1973, is infectious.

He’ll make you want to sit down and listen to a bunch of records all night.

“We all have spent hours enthralled, listening to music, and it’s so important to our lives,” said Lauderdale. “We all have our individual experiences with it, and feelings it evokes, and our favorites. So I’m just a big fan of so many people, and so many influential people in my life.”

Bryant Liggett is a freelance writer and KDUR station manager. liggett_b@fortlewis.edu.

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[sound]

Nicole Sorensen, Durango’s BEST!

What’s new

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Various Artists,“Start Your Own F***ing Show Space: Live at DBA” Available: Now via Famous Class on standard black vinyl 3xLP and while supplies last in a limited edition 3xLP clear with opaque blue and red vinyl. A deluxe version of the triple LP is also available for preorder and includes a live set from Ty Segall. All vinyl versions include a digital download.

Death by Audio was many things to many people, it would appear. To me, it was a venue I outwardly recognized when perusing bands’ tour stops and itineraries. I knew that it was located in Brooklyn, New York. I also knew it was “started” by A Place to Bury Strangers guitarist/vocalist Oliver Ackermann as a (their?) recording studio and his effects pedal workshop. I use “started” cautiously, as these sorts of collectives take many, many dedicated people to see through to its birth, life, and in this case, eventual death.

During its 12-year span from 2002 to 2014, Death by Audio played host to 1,800-plus shows that ran the gamut stylistically within the indie realm. This compilation – presented in chronological order no less – documents the

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Coldwell Banker Heritage House Realtors 785 Main Ave, Durango, CO 81301 staggeringly awesome final month run of live shows leading up to the close. Many of the bands that came back through could’ve easily booked substantially larger venues (and, in turn, could’ve made more money), but chose to send off the space in grand fashion.

Protomartyr, JEFF The Brotherhood, Dan Deacon, Future Islands, Natural Child and Parquet Courts just skim the surface of bands that made appearances. The audio quality is fantastic, and the records are well worth the purchase.

For fans of making something out of nothing, the DIY ethic, and the music that accompanies it including but not limited to Ted Leo, Ty Segall, Screaming Females, Lightning Bolt or Deerhoof.

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New at Southwest Sound Aug. 19 1. Lindsey Stirling,“Brave Enough” The internet superstar returns with her new album featuring collaborations with Rivers Cuomo, Robert DeLong and ZZ Ward. Her eclectic blend of contemporary dance and beautiful string melodies immediately caught the attention of the world on her first record, and this new one is sure to do the same.

2. French Montana,“MC4” One of the premiere artists off Rick Ross’ “Maybach Music,” French Montana was a slow burner on the scene, allegedly being shut out by the media after a beef in the early 2000s. That is no longer the case, however. After surviving multiple shootings, he has risen to the top, and “MC4” will probably be blowing out the windows at Moe’s sometime soon.

3. Lydia Loveless,“Real” This new one is loud. Louder than you

expect. Lydia has come into her own, and is no longer content to be called a combination of this and that. Imagine Iggy Pop singing songs in a dusty country bar, and you are on your way to imagining her sound.

4. Tobacco,“Sweatbox Dynasty” The wizard of weird returns. His tape loops will dazzle. The bass may frighten and arouse. Psychedelic doesn’t even do a dent to describe the man’s madness. Witness it and be in awe.

5. AJJ,“Bible” Formerly known as Andrew Jackson Jihad, AJJ makes a style of music commonly referred to as “folk punk.”

If you like the type of music the crust punk kids on the downtown corners play, this album is your style.

Celebrate the downfall of capitalism in style.

—— Cooper Stapleton 237203

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[beer]

First Draughts | Robert Alan Wendeborn

The Four Corners are full of weird alcohol laws

L

ast Monday, I was at a Mexican restaurant and and ordered a two-for-one frozen margarita. I drank the first one there and the second was poured into a styrofoam cup, and I walked out sipping my ice-cold alcoholic beverage.

No, this Mexican restaurant was not in heaven and no I was not breaking the law. I was in Louisiana, where it is perfectly legal to get your booze to go (as long as the dispenser of the booze does not put the straw in the cup for me). It’s called a go-cup, and it’s awesome.

There are all kinds of weird differences in laws from state to state about alcohol because, since prohibition has ended, it’s been entirely left up to states to control the sale, production and distribution of alcohol inside their borders; all the feds do is regulate that alcohol if it crosses a state’s border (and a tiny and free little permit to export alcohol if your booze is leaving the country).

In Colorado there is the funny little grocery store thing, but most states allow it. Of the states in the Southwest, Colorado is certainly the weird one, but like the go-cup, this is an awesome law that makes Colorado even more awesome. However, most weirdnesses involving alcohol laws make a state horrible. Take Utah for instance: In most restaurants that serve alcohol, there must be barrier between the person preparing or pouring an alcoholic beverage and the rest of the restaurant. This is to prevent people who don’t want to drink from seeing the alcohol. They’re called Zion Curtains, and they’re an effing joke. It’s almost like they believe in secondhand alcohol consumption or something.

(Pregnant women and Mormons are apparently allergic to alcohol.) This is just one of the many many ridiculous reasons you shouldn’t live in Utah.

In New Mexico, there were epic levels of DWI fatalities in the ’80s and ’90s (Up to 68 percent of traffic fatalities were alcohol-related.), and there were sweeping changes to the way alcohol was sold, and thus, consumed. In addition to doing really smart things like extended jail time for repeat offenders

and requiring interlock ignitions on DUI offenders, the state of New Mexico also did some really dumb things. They locked in the number of liquor licences for on-site consumption and pegged that number to the population. The logic kinda makes sense: Fewer places to drink means fewer people drink. But the result? The fewer places to drink, the farther people have to drive to drink. (In a very rural state like New Mexico, you have to drive.) The worst part though, because it is a finite resource, is the liquor license becomes a piece of property, a very, very valuable piece of property. Liquor licenses go for six or seven figures in New Mexico. That’s just the license and that’s just when someone wants to sell theirs.

So if you wanted to open a bar in New Mexico, you need a million dollars, just to get permission to put the booze in the glass. One of the other many, many dumb things about this law is that it pegs economic growth to population growth, not the actual growth of the economy, or anything that makes sense. The dumbest part though, is probably that it hasn’t proved to be a factor in the reduction in the incidents of DWIs. So New Mexico has a terrible relationship with alcohol consumption, Utah is terrified of the substance and Colorado has that wonky little grocery store thing (which is slowly phasing out over the next 20 years, so we’ll be normal eventually). But what about Arizona? Arizona is probably the most progressive state of the Four Corners as far as alcohol goes. There are no restrictions of time or day of sales, no strange laws about where or who can sell it or make it. It’s genuinely a normal state as far as alcohol goes. Which is crazy because I dislike Arizona more than any other state in the entire country (mostly because I hate Sheriff Arpaio, and I think Phoenix is just a really big, really hot suburb of Los Angeles). So maybe I’ve got to give some of Arizona’s beer a try?

Illustration by David Holub/DGO

Robert Alan Wendeborn is a former cellar operator at Ska Brewing and current lead cellar operator at Tin Roof Brewing in Baton Rouge, Louisiana.

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[Serving] Confessions of a 20-something waitress Taylor Ferraro

A day in the life of a chef, a restaurant’s unsung hero

I

f each restaurant were a play, the servers would fill the lead roles, memorize the lines, put on all the makeup and wear the shiny clothes, giving off the impression that they are the stars of the show. This is far from the truth. Servers may be the ones to dazzle you and cater to your needs but behind every good server is an even better cook. Remember the people in plays who wear all black and do all of the heavy lifting and behind-the-scenes work when the lights are low? The people who don’t have any lines and don’t get much credit? In the restaurant world these people are the chefs and line cooks and should be considered the real stars of the dinner production. Check out what a day in the shoes of a chef looks like:

9 a.m.

The morning cook opens up the restaurant around 9 a.m., makes a fresh pot of coffee and gets straight to work. The list of things to do is long: Make cheesecake, prepare crab stuffed mushrooms, fillet the fish, cook the prime rib, weigh and portion the crab legs, make a raspberry sauce for the cheesecake, throw together a soup of the day, make sure there will be enough food for dinner service, etc. And often all of these tasks are being done while cooking food for lunch service. Multitasking at its finest.

2:30 p.m.

By mid-afternoon the restaurant is closed for lunch. At this time, the server on a double (working lunch and dinner) will have the cook prepare them something to eat and go on their merry way to enjoy their break. The cook, however, gets to stay inside the restaurant, on his or her feet, and continue to prepare for dinner service. The worst part is that after preparing the ongoing list of food, the cook probably isn’t even hungry. Imagine that, a cook who doesn’t eat. Its not uncommon.

Dinner service When 4 p.m. rolls around, most of the food for the day has been prepared and the cooks begin to gear up for happy hour. For six hours the ticket machine does not stop. The rush begins when the famished 9-to-5’ers stroll in for cocktails and half-priced appetizers. Once the

bar is full, the overflow travels into the dining room to enjoy dinner, drinks and good service.

A full restaurant is great!

But for a two-man kitchen there is barely time to breathe. Pans are sizzling, all eight burners are going, food is being plated, dishes are clashing and the grill is searing hot. If you’re the one cooking, you better expect to be burned at least once a night.

And you better be a master at managing your pain because there is no time to apply burn cream in the middle of a dinner rush.

As mentioned before, all cooks on the line have to be good at multitasking and, of course, listening. I can’t tell you how many times I (the server) have run up to the kitchen and said “Woopsie, forgot to tell you that plate needs to be split,” “No blue cheese on that fillet mignon,” “Can you please sauté spinach for the veg on this dish?” “Can I have a side of sour cream, please?” “There cannot be butter on any of this dish,” and those are just a few requests/orders from one server. Multiply this by five, and then we’re talking. Ah, the life of a cook.

At the end of the night I think of the endless requests I put in to the kitchen, and I am always amazed that everything is taken care of kindly and in a timely manner – and they aren’t even working for a tip. Now that is five-star service.

Illustration by David Holub/DGO

Closing time Finally, the clock strikes 10 p.m. and it is time to lock the doors. A sigh of relief leaves the kitchen as the cooks step outside to get their nicotine fix before disassembling the line. After six hours of constant work, it is finally time for the kitchen crew to clock out, drink a beer, go to bed and get ready to do it all again the next day.

Whether you work in the service industry or you are dining out, let this be a reminder to thank the unsung heroes of the restaurant for their long hours, quick delivery and delicious food.

Taylor Ferraro provides five-star service and entertainment at the Red Snapper.

She is also a massage therapist and KDUR DJ. Contact her at tferr8@hotmail.com.

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[visual]

The Stormtrooper speaks »» A chat with Hank Blum, the man behind the ‘Star Wars’ mask you may have seen around town You might have seen a rogue Stormtrooper wandering around Durango. That’s Hank Blum, self-taught photographer and “Star Wars” enthusiast, who regularly photographs himself in the costume exploring the La Plata Mountains. On special occasions like Halloween or May the 4th (unofficial “Star Wars” day), Blum graces our downtown with this $2,000 fashion statement, custom fit to his dimensions.

We chatted with Blum about the weird and wonderful hobby.

How did you acquire the suit?

For the video “Durango Stormtrooper About Town,“ starring Hank Blum, go to dgomag.com

I won a bet through a bookie.

He didn’t pay me on time, and so as a favor, he said he’d hook me up with someone who does these costumes.

Why did you start taking photos while wearing it out in nature?

brother up there, who is from Dallas, and he thought the picture looked like it was painted. So I had the idea to take a paintbrush and pretend to paint the mountains.

We had to hike probably about a mile. It doesn’t seem far, but carrying that backpack (my wife carrying the camera gear), with a storm coming on, made it really fun. We got hailed on.

I’ve had people ask this often; they want to know if I was stoned or under the influence of alcohol when I came up with the idea. But I literally just had the costume sitting in my room, and I have always wanted to be a landscape photographer, but that’s so saturated in this town. I wanted to do something that would set me apart. It has clearly done that.

What does your wife think about all this?

How do you carry it up/down mountains?

That’s the most challenging part. I have an inflatable »» Hank Blum as Stormtrooper, at Hair Fusion in Durango. paddleboard backpack, it’s huge and I stuff everything in a certain way so it all fits.

It weighs about 38 pounds.

I lug it up. It’s not very comfortable, but it gets the job done. And then I spend 10 minutes actually putting the costume on.

Can you eat or drink inside it?

The first shot we ever did with me in the suit was on a paddle board. My wife thought it was really crazy.

It was in winter, and I was David Holub/DGO petrified when I got on the board because I couldn’t see through my mask. With the cold air and warm air coming out of my mouth, I was literally paddling blind. So she’s got Search and Rescue on speed dial to call at all times.

But I think she’s gotten into it, as it picked up some steam.

What do you like about wearing the suit?

Only without the helmet. Unless I run a straw up underneath.

People’s reactions. Other than that, there’s not much to like. It’s not comfortable at all. You can imagine walking around like the Tin Man, very rigid and stiff. Anytime you want to sit down, it’ll pinch you in spots you’d prefer not to be pinched.

You were contacted by “The Ellen Show”?

I got an email inquiring about the suit and the story from “The Ellen Show.”

Haven’t heard anything back yet.

What’s the coolest place you’ve hiked to with the costume?

Up Hurricane Pass in Silverton. That’s where I got my somewhat-famous shot of me painting Red Mountain. I took my

For more of Blum’s work, find him at hankblum.com or on Instagram @hankblumphotography Courtesy of Hank Blum

»» Hank Blum as Stormtrooper

— Anya Jaremko-Greenwold

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[visual]

Courtesy of Hank Blum

Courtesy of Hank Blum

David Holub/DGO Courtesy of Hank Blum

»» Hank Blum as Stormtrooper, at El Moro Spirits & Tavern in Durango.

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[iAM MUSIC Festival]

Grass-roots indie music fest takes Durango by storm »» Everything you need to know about the iAM MUSIC Festival 2016 The second annual iAM MUSIC Fest isn’t about securing world-famous big name acts like Pearl Jam (who headlined Ride in Telluride last month). Organizer and iAM MUSIC co-founder Jesse Ogle compares it to an indie film festival with low-budget, high-quality passion projects. The three-day grass-roots music festival will run from Thursday, Aug. 18 to Saturday, Aug. 20, exposing Durangoans to authentic musicians. “There’s no agenda, there’s no management company telling them what to do,” said Ogle. “They’re making all these decisions.” The 20+ participating bands, visual artists and performing artists can collaborate and network with each other, furthering their burgeoning careers.

So why pay money to see musicians you’ve never heard of? “Why go travel?” Ogle countered. “Why not just stay in Durango? Do you want to seek something new out, have an experience you haven’t had before?” If you’d prefer to check out some of the bands ahead of time, there’s a SoundCloud page on iAM MUSIC’s website.

There is a space and event for everyone, depending on your festival style. “If you like sitting on a lawn and throwing down a blanket, Saturday is your day,” said Ogle. “There’s more music on Saturday than any other day. The stage at Buckley and at the Smiley, it’s set up to walk back and forth really easily. It’s meant to keep you moving a little bit. If you like having an experience that’s really intimate, Friday is your night

David Holub/DGO

»» Jesse Ogle at the iAM MUSIC Institute. at Animas Trading Co., the iAM MUSIC stage and Craft Spirits outdoor stage. The Rochester is where we kick off, that’s a nice vibe if you like to sit down and just listen to things. Same with the ACT. And if you’re someone who likes to get down and dance, the late night stages are good for you. Some people are featured twice in the festival, so you can choose when you want to see them.”

The festival is affordable and boasts a ton of local

sponsors (including DGO), indicating an immense community effort. “We really don’t have a music festival here,” Ogle said. “We have one-off shows and the Bluegrass Meltdown, but that’s genre-specific. So we’re offering an experience Durango doesn’t have.” Here, Ogle shares some details about the musical stylings of these festival bands. For venues and showtimes, visit www.iammusicfest. com.

A RUNDOWN OF THE PERFORMERS HELLO, DOLLFACE (DURANGO) Genre: Neo soul + experimental R&B Performing: Thurs./Sat. IMAGINARIO CIRCUS (DURANGO) Genre: Circus & variety troupe, aerial, dance, burlesque Jesse says: “Durango’s only theatrical show. Anything from a mime to silks to lyra to play-like stuff. They’ll be collaborating with Hello, Dollface on a few songs.”

Performing: Sat. CAPTAIN SQUEEGEE (PHOENIX) Genre: Metaphysical rock Jesse says: “An eight-piece prog rock, holy-shit-oh-my-god type of band. Very theatrical. Frank Zappa-ish.”

Performing: Fri. ROSSONIAN (DENVER) Genre: Electro-sensual rock & roll Jesse says: “They finished No. 8 in the Tiny Desk concert series for NPR. They’re

super hip, indie rock with great vocals that are very soulful. Almost Stevie Wonder-esque, but with a rock-driven thing.

They’re really our biggest featured rock act at the fest.”

Performing: Sat. CHIMNEY CHOIR (DENVER) Genre: Avant pop & Americana Jesse says: “A very unique folk-electronic act.”

Performing: Fri.

FRESH NOISE (DENVER) Genre: Future R&B Jesse says: “A band featuring Mikey Smith and Joseph Lamar, two pretty well-known Denver acts. Prince-like. Soul, groove.”

Performing: Fri./Sat. MILLER & THE OTHER SINNERS (ROCHESTER, NY) Genre: Blues/gospel Jesse says: “They are gospel and soul. The guy David Miller has an album

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[iAM MUSIC Festival] out right now; it’s in the top of the blues charts even though they’re more gospel.”

Performing: Sat. VE (LOS ANGELES) Genre: Hip-hop Jesse says: “A hip-hop artist and author and lyricist.”

Performing: Fri./Sat. KATIE HAVERLY & THE AVIARY (TUCSON, AZ) Genre: Jazz folk Jesse says: “A songwriter, folk soul Americana. Joined by Ben Nisbet, first chair violinist of the Tucson Symphony.

Katie is really getting a lot of headway in Tucson, she’s one of the top female artists down there. The band is kind of Joni Mitchell in some respects, then will go really funky. She’s always doing eclectic projects.”

Performing: Fri./Sat. ELDERGROWN (DURANGO) Genre: Funk roots rock Jesse says: “One of our local, famous bands. Three brothers who formed a group. Funk and disco and jam.”

Performing: Sat. ANDRE RODRIGUEZ (PHOENIX) Genre: Songwriter, soul, reggae Jesse says: “A soul and reggae musician out of Phoenix. Phenomenal vocalist.

I’m surprised he’s not famous.”

Performing: Fri./Sat. AT PLAY (BOULDER) Genre: Experimental electronic Jesse says: “An electronic dance group. They do two-piece drums and play trumpet. It’s really cool.”

Performing: Fri. HOUSE OF STAIRS (PHOENIX) Genre: Future soul jazz Jesse says: “They’re a female-led band, pretty dynamic. They fit into this R&B jazz realm but they do a lot of cool rearrangements of ’90s songs, and they’re pretty eclectic in their original stuff.”

Performing: Thurs./Fri/Sat. LET THEM ROAR (CARBONDALE) Genre: Mountain folk Jesse says: “A phenomenal band.

They’re like folk, pop, jazz, Americana.

They blend a lot of different stuff, with a

lot of good vocal harmonies.”

Performing: Sat. DELANEY DAVIS (RUIDOSO, NM) Genre: Acoustic, folk, soul Jesse says: “She’s a songwriter touring with her second album. She does looping and some vocal harmonizing stuff.”

Performing: Fri./Sat. BRANDON MCINTOSH AND JOSH HUMPHREY (SEATTLE) Genre: Hindustani & North Indian Jesse says: “These are two of our featured musicians that are very eclectic. Brandon runs the Seattle Raga Institute. I’ve never heard of a North Indian group coming to town since I’ve lived here!”

Performing: Fri./Sat. AFROBEATNIKS (DURANGO) Genre: AfroCuban + Latin Jesse says: “They do Afrobeat music.

Almost all original compositions. Really great full horn section.”

Performing: Fri.

SANS PAGAIE (PHOENIX) Genre: Jazz, experimental groove Jesse says: “A straight-up, heavy-hitting jazz quintet.”

Performing: Fri./Sat. JILLIAN & THE GIANTS (TUCSON, AZ) Genre: Folk, Americana, pop Performing: Fri./Sat. LISA BYRNE (DURANGO) Genre: Sound healing + didgeridoo Performing: Sat. BEN SHARF (EUGENE, OR) Genre: Songwriter, folk, soul, jazz Jesse says: “He’s a soul pop keyboardist.”

Performing: Fri. J POP (TUCSON, AZ) Genre: Instrumental, hip-hop Jesse says: “A solo drum project with electronics.”

Performing: Fri. RUSSICK SMITH (BRECKENRIDGE)

Genre: Indie rock, funk Jesse says: “They’re like reggae, funk, soul.”

Performing: Sat.

Genre: Ambient cello pop Jesse says: “He’s very eclectic, plays with loops and backing tracks and also plays a lot of other instruments like squeezebox and bass.”

Performing: Fri./Sat.

WAKE UP LAUGHING (MANCOS)

IAM MUSIC STUDENTS (DURANGO)

Genre: Reggae rock Jesse says: “Local band out of Cortez and Mancos. Funk, reggae, rock.”

Performing: Fri.

Songwriters & band Styles Jesse says: “A band from a workshop from the summer. They do everything from Led Zeppelin to Bob Marley to John Legend.”

Performing: Sat.

CHAVA PEOPLE (DURANGO)

DISCO ORGANICA (EUGENE, OR) Genre: Disco, jazz, funk Jesse says: “I’m going to be playing bass with them, and Ashley [Edwards] will be sitting in as well. They’re a disco funk project.”

Performing: Thurs./Fri./Sat. SETH EVANS (DENVER) Genre: Freak pop, songwriter Jesse says: “Soul and pop and indie.”

Performing: Fri. CANNONDOLLS (DURANGO) Genre: Country, Americana Jesse says: “Our local girl heroes.”

Performing: Fri.

NON-MUSIC EVENTS SOUNDHEALING AND YOGA About: Bring a mat and relax stageside.

Music with Lisa Byrne and yoga led by Michelle Lawrence.

Jesse says: “Lisa runs Epic Magazine and she also plays didgeridoo. It’s kicking the day off up at the Smiley courtyard in the grass.”

When: Sat. LIVING ARTIST GARDEN About: Garden open to all creators, all mediums, or bring your existing work to sell. Easels available. Bring your supplies or use supplies on hand. Paint must be

water-soluble.

When: Sat. EXPERIMENTAL STORYTELLING WITH DAVID HOLUB About: In his make-you-laugh-or-makeyou-cry style, Holub tells the irreverently hilarious truish story, “Dispatches from My Maiden Visit to Washington, D.C. (and The Indian Food That Almost Killed Me).” David is a writer, performer and the Editor and Creative Director at DGO magazine.

When: Fri./Sat.

CREATIVE WORKSHOPS AT IAM MUSIC INSTITUTE VOCAL TOOLBOX, A VOCAL WORKSHOP About: Foundational vocal performance workshop.

Presenter: Ashley Edwards of Hello, Dollface, founder of iAM MUSIC When: Sat. HIP HOP ENTREPRENEUR, “ARTISTPRENEURSHIP” About: South Central Los Angeles native Ve gives insights on how to work the music industry from multiple angles.

Presenter: Rodve Lewis, author and performer Ve When: Sat. WHY STORYTELLING MATTERS, WRITING AND PERFORMING About: Discussing the ingredients of a good story, why storytelling is valuable as an art form and how it connects us through the human experience.

Presenter: David Holub, writer, performer and DGO magazine When: Sat. HINDUSTANI, NORTH INDIAN ETHNIC MUSIC About: Learn the basic principles of Hindustani Music of India. The concepts of raag (melody) and taal (rhythm) will be introduced, with examples and demonstrations of the stringed instrument sarod and the tabla drums.

Presenters: Brandon Mcintosh and Josh Humphrey of Seattle Raga Institute When: Sat.

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[movies] Cafe Society Playing at Animas City Theatre Rating: PG-13 Genre: Drama,

romance Directed by:

Woody Allen Written by: Woody Allen Runtime: 1 hr. 25 min.

Rotten Tomatoes Tomatometer: 70% Synopsis: Set in the 1930s, Bronx-

born Bobby Dorfman goes to Hollywood and back to New York, where he is swept up in the world of high society nightclub life.

Ben-Hur Playing at Stadium 9 (Also available in 3-D with surcharge) Rating: PG-13 Genre: Classics,

drama Directed by: Timur Bekmambetov Written by: John Ridley, Keith R.

Clarke Runtime: 2 hr. 4 min.

Rotten Tomatoes Tomatometer: 33% Synopsis: The story of Judah Ben-Hur,

a prince falsely accused of treason by his adopted brother, an officer in the Roman army.

Kubo and the Two Strings Playing at Stadium 9 (Also available in 3-D) Rating: PG Genre: Action &

adventure, animation Directed by: Travis Knight Written by: Marc Haimes, Chris

Butler Runtime: 1 hr. 41 min.

Rotten Tomatoes Tomatometer: 91% Synopsis: An action-adventure set in

a fantastical Japan.

Warner Bros. Pictures via AP

»» Miles Teller, center, and Jonah Hill star in “War Dogs.”

‘War Dogs’ lacks bite

By Ann Hor naday © 2016, THE WASHINGTON POST

Efraim Diveroli (Jonah Hill), the ungainly, socially awkward miscreant at the center of “War Dogs,” surrounds himself with paraphernalia from the movie “Scarface.” A still of Tony Montana and his “little friend” hangs on the wall of Efraim’s Miami office, a cut-rate military contractor called AEY; when Efraim gives his partner and best friend, David Packouz (Miles Teller), a gift, it’s a gold-plated hand grenade, inscribed with a quote from the film: “The World Is Yours.”

The poster for “War Dogs” is even reminiscent of the one for “Scarface,” which offers the first clue to why the new movie doesn’t work. Co-writer and director Todd Phillips – best known for the “Hangover” comedies – doesn’t seem sure if he’s celebrating Efraim and David’s dubious occupation or scolding it.

For a movie about the gonzo, giddy world of gunrunning, ripping off the Pentagon and doing bong hits while living large in South Beach, “War Dogs” has a weird lack of energy and bite. Based on a Rolling Stone article about the real-life Diveroli and Packouz’s career as gray-market arms dealers, “War Dogs” stays at arm’s length from the subjects, afraid to implicate us in the pleasures and prosperity of their rise, thus making their fall seem

War Dogs Playing at Stadium 9 Rating: R Genre: Comedy, drama Directed by: Todd Phillips Written by: Stephen Chin, Todd

Phillips, Jason Smilovic Runtime: 1 hr. 44 min.

Rotten Tomatoes Tomatometer: 61%

distant, puny and unaffecting.

Haphazardly written and fitfully paced, “War Dogs” admittedly contains more than a few infectiously funny moments – usually courtesy of Hill, who plays Efraim with enormous girth, slicked-back hair and a fluttery, high-pitched laugh – and an irresistibly catchy soundtrack, including what may be the most crass use of “Fortunate Son” ever committed to film. (That’s the real-life Packouz in an early scene singing an acoustic version of “Don’t Fear the Reaper” in a nursing home.) One memorable scene, of the stoned-out protagonists pitching some Pentagon procurement officials in an Illinois business office, is staged for maximum Coen-esque absurdity.

But for every hit there are as many or more misses, whether in the form of sluggish pacing or Teller’s lackluster, drearily written voice-over, in which he describes everything as “X

but Y.” A Vegas trade show the two attend to make high-dollar contacts is “Comic-Con, but with grenades.”

A government website they scour for potential arms deals is “eBay, but for war.”

OK, then: “War Dogs” is “Goodfellas,” but with none of that film’s pulse, anthropological detail or seductive immediacy: It’s “Whoa, dude-fellas.”

Nominally the story of how Packouz reunited with his best friend from junior high to make millions in gaming the contracting system during the Bush-Cheney years, “War Dogs” often feels like little more than a couple of guys bro’ing down in exotic locales, repeating the common trope of real-life conflicts serving as backdrops for American derring-do and, finally, self-realization. Efraim and David’s sordid pastime will eventually take them to Fallujah and the nastier precincts of Albania, where high jinks ensue with the same inevitability as the boys’ eventual comeuppance.

All those DePalma nods and Scorsese freeze frames should telegraph loud and clear where this story is headed: The reckoning, when it comes, leaves the audience feeling deflated and depressed, and far more cynical than when they walked in. That’s not necessarily inappropriate, but the pessimism feels unearned in a film that never firmly decides where its sympathies lie.

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[ weed ] Seeing Through the Smoke Christopher Gallagher

Inside the DEA’s decision not to reschedule cannabis

S

o, last Thursday, the Drug Enforcement Agency refused to reschedule cannabis. It has been classified since 1970 as a Schedule I chemical, defined by the DEA as “drugs with no currently accepted medical use and a high potential for abuse” alongside heroin, Quaaludes, GHB, bath salts and most hallucinogens.

This is, on one hand, a disappointment because it had seemed, based on the path of history and public support, that this long-awaited decision from Washington might come down on the side of reason and the ever-growing weight of science.

But, this is the DEA, the DEA of Aslinger and the origin of cannabis prohibition and “Reefer Madness,” the DEA of Colombian sex scandals, asset forfeiture, Bitcoin extortion and illegal wiretapping; looking to them for support might be akin to a group of chickens looking to a fox for support or sheep looking to wolves for support (I could continue ad infinitum with these nature metaphors). An article in The Atlantic from April 2015 demonstrates what the DEA has been up to over the past few years. It’s not pretty.

Here is the current state of cannabis as medicine in these United States. Twenty-five (yes, half) states and the District of Columbia operate legal medical marijuana programs. An additional 16 states run CBD-only programs aimed primarily at providing medicine for seizure disorders. That’s 41 states total; by comparison, Sonic drive-in burger restaurants are located in 38 states.

This current decision is the end result of three separate petitions filed with the aim of removing

cannabis from the list of this country’s most strictly-monitored chemicals, one filed in 2009 by Bryan Krumm of New Mexico, a psychiatric nurse practitioner who has been using it to treat PTSD, and two filed in 2011 by the former governors of Washington state and Rhode Island, Chris Gregoire and Lincoln Chaffe (both petitions have been supported by the current governors, Jay Inslee in Washington and Gina Raimondo in Rhode Island). Three previous petitions have been filed in attempts to reschedule cannabis, going back to the 1972 filing by the National Organization for the Reform of Marijuana Laws (NORML); each of these Illustration by David Holub/DGO was also denied, including a 1988 denial that came in spite of the proclamation by their own Chief Administrative Law Judge Francis L. Young that natural cannabis is “one of the safest therapeutically active substances known to man. (T)he provisions of the (Controlled Substances) Act permit and require the transfer of marijuana from Schedule I to Schedule II.” There is also the exception made in 1985-86 by the DEA for the rescheduling from I to II of delta-9 tetrahydrocannabinol or THC, the main psychoactive ingredient in cannabis, after it was isolated and converted to a pill form known as Marinol.

That might be the direction we are headed. The DEA did not come to the decision to not reschedule cannabis solely by its own wits; the Food and Drug Administration was the primary background de-

cision maker; it is the FDA that is responsible for making government policy when it comes to drugs.

The reason Marinol is Schedule II (drugs with high potential for abuse, currently accepted medical use in the United States, the abuse of which may lead to severe psychological or physical dependence, like most opiates and amphetamines, like Adderall and Ritalin) is because, unlike raw cannabis or wholeplant extracts, it is one single, isolated compound.

That chemistry-based isolation is the arena of the FDA and the pharmaceutical companies with whom it works closely.

The single “concession” made by the DEA in announcing its decision last week was the proclamation that it would expand the list of approved manufacturers (cannabis growers) beyond the current monopoly at the University of Mississippi in order to provide more and more appropriate strains of cannabis for study by sanctioned researchers.

I’m personally torn over whether this latest decision by the DEA is a good thing or a bad thing. On the plus side, the status quo since California created the first state-run medical marijuana program in 1996 has seen nearly unbelievable growth and expansion through Democrat and Republican administrations, with the current levels of oversight. The current Democrat presidential platform even calls for a “reasoned pathway to future legalization,” and Hillary Clinton said last week that she would reschedule if she is elected in November. On the negative side, the threat of DEA raids and the asset forfeitures that spur them still exist, patients in several states have no access to one of the only medicines that effectively helps their conditions and legitimate businesses are denied access to banking and tax exemptions as a result of Nixon’s willful decision in 1970 to ignore science. And here we sit, on the front lines of history, waiting for what might come next.

Christopher Gallagher lives with his wife and their four dogs and two horses. Life is pretty darn good. Contact him at chrstphrgallagher@gmail.com

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[SPONSORED REVIEW]

[Netflix and chill — 420 edition]

‘Frances Ha’ earnest but sort of clumsy and bumbling, a talented physical actress with whom it’s easy to identify. Her loneliness and struggles to sustain an expensive New York City lifestyle is relatable if you’ve ever felt unwelcomed by a bustling city, sent out hundreds of cover letters with no response or lost your best friend to changing circumstances. In one of the film’s saddest scenes, Frances go to Paris all by herself (using a credit card she got in the mail) and has a shitty time.

This is one of those movies that almost hurts to watch because of how true it is. It’s about millennial melancholy, not having any money and not having career prospects because your degree is in the arts. Frances Halladay (Greta Gerwig) is a 27-year-old living in Brooklyn with a background in dance and choreography. The film’s central conflict begins when Sophie, her best friend and roommate, announces that she’s moving out.

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“Frances Ha” was directed by Noah Baumbach (“The Squid and the Whale”) and jointly written by Baumbach and leading lady Gerwig (who are a couple in real life). It’s shot in classic black-and-white, mimicking the masterpiece cinematography of Woody Allen’s “Manhattan.” Truth be told, New York looks best in black-and-white, all the grime and garbage fading away into contrast leaving behind only shapely silhouettes.

The era of the ‘bromance’ arrived in full force years ago with “The Hangover,” “Superbad” and “Knocked Up,” illustrating the powerful bonds men share. But with the recent, rising popularity of shows like “Girls,” “Broad City” and “Orange is the New Black,” friendships between women have taken center stage. These feminine attachments are volatile, complex, competitive and important. “Frances Ha” captures the platonic romance between 20-something girlfriends with charming accuracy.

After Sophie moves out and gets serious with her boyfriend, the friends begin to sadly drift apart. Gerwig is pretty and

This is a 420 Netflix pick because stoned, you’ll be amused rather than bothered by all those terrible New York moments (trying to catch the subway when it’s not running or looking everywhere for an ATM). You might even chuckle at the pervasive sorrow (the movie was billed as a comedy, but it’s more funny in the ‘laugh-so-you-don’t-cry’ way). Much of the dialogue is awkward and stilted, like when Frances attends an uncomfortable grown-up dinner party that rivals Michael and Jan’s dinner party on “The Office.” “I’m so embarrassed, I’m not a real person yet,” Frances apologizes to a friend at one point. Doesn’t everyone in their 20s feel like that?

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���������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������� Thursday, August 18, 2016 | 19

[love and sex]

Savage Love | Dan Savage

Another Dan Savage: LTRs aren’t the end of great sex DEAR READERS: I’m on vacation for three weeks – but you won’t be reading old columns in my absence, and you won’t be reading columns by anyone who isn’t Dan Savage. You’ll be reading new columns, all of them written by Dan Savage, none of them written by me.

Our second guest Dan Savage is 32 years old, single, and living in London. Dan Savage got his professional start working in promotions at the legendary London nightclub G-A-Y. He’s now 10 years into a career in theater arts marketing and currently works for some of the West End’s biggest hit musicals. Dan has never written a sex-advice column before, but he occasionally gets angry tweets that were meant for me.

A quick word about qualifications: Advice is defined as “an opinion about what could or should be done.”

We’re all entitled to our opinions – but only Dan Savage, theatrical marketing exec, is entitled to share his opinions in my column this week. Take it away, Dan! I’m an early-30s bi woman. As I have more relationships, I have started to see a pattern in that I find sex much hotter when there is some degree of confusion or forbidden-ness. So relationship sex can get boring quickly. I know there’s not necessarily a good answer for why, but any suggestions on what to do about this? I want to have great sex with a partner for life! Maybe my expectations about good sex in a long-term relationship are unrealistic? I know it’s not always going to be crazy passion, but how can I sustain amazing sex in a relationship?

Passion Fades From This A problem you and I share! The fun is in the chase, the excitement of someone new, and that first time. You may return for a second or maybe a third time – but then what or who is next? Often regardless of whatever feelings may have started to develop.

For those who don’t understand, just imagine we’re talking about food. You like food. You like lots of different types of food. Right now, your favorite food is hot dogs. But you don’t want to eat that every day. Occasionally, you might want an all-you-can-eat sushi buffet.

I believe the secret to a good relationship – besides love and passion – is keeping it downright dirty! It’s about keeping that spark alive. If the fun starts to fade, spice it up with toys, games, risky locations, additional people, rubber dog masks – you

can’t know what will excite you both until you give it a try! But that’s the key, that you both like it.

There are millions of people all over the world in long-term relationships that on the face of it maintain a fun and healthy sex life – can it really be that hard? Or maybe long-term relationships aren’t for you, PFFT! I am a 65-year-old male new to gay relationships. I placed a listing on SilverDaddies and have had a LOT of responses from great young guys. I have met only one guy so far. He is 23 and says he has had only a few girlfriends and has not had any gay experiences. He is so passionate.

Very oral. Long kissing sessions, and he puts his tongue EVERYWHERE. Very submissive and insatiable. Of course I use condoms. I asked him what he gets out of this. He said he gets an intensity he can’t explain over pleasing an older man that he doesn’t get from sex with a female. Being a sub makes him rock hard, and with a woman, he has to be the performer. He considers himself straight, since he is attracted only to older men and is only a bottom. In any case, he will be back at grad school soon, and I will no doubt have another partner. I have never had an STD. I don’t want to get one now. I talked to a clinic over the phone about getting the HPV vaccine, and they thought it was funny and would not do it. I will be seeing young guys who are sexually active, so I think I should be able to get this vaccine. I do not want cold sores or warts or whatever at my age.

This Old Pop I think it’s great – if you don’t mind me saying – that in your advanced years you are able to embark on this new sexual adventure and experimentation, TOP! And you have a hot 23-year-old visiting you for regular sex – something a lot of people much younger than you would kill for!

As long as you are safe and wear a condom, you shouldn’t put too much stress on yourself regarding STIs. Maybe just don’t go around picking up boys off street corners who look like they need a good wash.

My personal opinion is this guy may not be being as honest with you as you’d have hoped. A 23-yearold straight guy, in his first homosexual encounter, being “very oral” and “only a bottom” and putting

“his tongue everywhere” – that sounds to me like someone who knows what they’re doing. My experience of first times is generally a quick fumble and an even quicker ejaculation.

Regardless, he is soon to leave, TOP, and you will find a new sexual partner. Advice from a YoungTOP to an OldTOP: Go with the flow and be safe, but most of all enjoy it! (And to older gay gentlemen who think you can’t get any: TOP is! You can!)

I am 39 years old and my husband is 51; we have been together nine years and married four. This morning, he was jacking off on my arse during foreplay and watching porn on his phone, which is not unusual. The problem is when I looked to see what he was watching (we often watch porn together), he got a little mad. I let it go, but when he got in the shower, I looked at his phone and saw that he was watching gay porn. MEN. I don’t think I have a problem with that, but it kind of threw me. Should I be worried that he is secretly on the down low? Or does he just like to look at gay porn occasionally? When I’m giving him a blowjob, he also enjoys me licking his arse.

I don’t know how to confront him with what I have seen on his phone?

Perspiring Over Relationship Now People look at all sorts of things online and are turned on by others. Man-on-man porn clearly does it for your man, or maybe this was the first time that he’d looked. Either way, the fact that he was doing this secretly while humped over your naked body and jacking off onto your arse is wrong. And he knows that: He hid the phone!

Rather than confronting him and creating a massive issue, why not suggest that you watch gay porn together. See what happens? If he is hiding the fact he’s gay or bi, I’d be surprised that he’d blatantly flaunt it like this ... perhaps he wanted you to catch him? He wants you to know what else he’s into but doesn’t know how to tell you?

Although it’s rarely spoken about, a lot of straight men like the odd finger or tongue in the bum. It’s not a sign of homosexuality! Maybe this could be taken further? You could go all out and strap one on and dominate him like a bitch!

Follow Dan Savage, Londoner and marketing exec, on Twitter @DanSavage83.

20 | Thursday, August 18, 2016 • • •••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

[happening] Looking for sax this weekend?

Thursday Railfest, 8 a.m.-7 p.m., Durango & Silverton Nar-

row Gauge Railroad, 479 Main Ave., www.durangotrain.com/events/railfest, 888-872-4607.

If it’s sax you’re looking for, then Zobomazé has a date for you.

The Denver-based, sax-fronted heavy rock (sometimes referred to as sax-metal) band will be playing at the Balcony on Friday night.

Formed in 2008, Zobomazé, made up of Doug Litvak on guitar; Zach Simms on saxophone and keys; Sean Dandurand on the bass and Michael Paff on drums, have played with George Clinton and P-Funk, The Motet, Papadosio, Boombox, EOTO and Garage A Trois.

The show starts at 9:30. For more information, call (970) 422-8008.

The Jeff Solon Jazz Duo, 5:30-7:30 p.m., Kennebec Cafe, 4 County Road 124, Hesperus, 247-5674. iAM MUSIC Fest, 5 p.m.-1 a.m., multiple stag-

es, downtown Durango, www.iammusicfest.com.

Burger & Band Night w/ La La Bones,

5 p.m., James Ranch Terraces, 33846 US 550, http://jamesranch.net/events.

Live music with Dave Mensch, 6 p.m., Irish Embassy Pub, 900 Main Ave., 403-1200, theirishembassypub.com.

Laugh Therapy, 8 p.m., Irish Embassy Pub,

900 Main Ave., 403-1200, theirishembassypub. com.

Jim Lauderdale (solo), 7 p.m., Animas City Theater, 128 College Drive. https://holdmyticket.com/tickets/248940.

Karaoke with DJ Crazy Charlie, 9 p.m.,

Wild Horse Saloon, 601 East Second Ave., 3752568.

Karaoke, 9 p.m., 8th Avenue Tavern, 509

East Eighth Ave., 259-8801.

The Durango Western Music and Vaudeville Show, 7 p.m., Henry Strater

Theatre, 699 Main Ave., 375-7160.

Blossoms galore watercolor art show, lunch and dinner, featuring Veryl

Courtesy of Zobomazé

Nadya Rosenbaum, The Farm Bistro, 34 West Main St., Cortez, 565-3834.

Friday Railfest, 8 a.m.-6 p.m., Durango & Silverton Narrow Gauge Railroad, 479 Main Ave., www. durangotrain.com/events/railfest, 888-8724607. iAM MUSIC Fest, 11:30 a.m.-1 a.m., multiple stages and locations, downtown Durango, www.iammusicfest.com.

The High Rollers – Silverton Summer Concert Series, 5 p.m., free, Silverton Memo-

rial Park, www.facebook.com/EventsinSilverton.

Paula Poundstone, 7:30 p.m., $34/$28,

Community Concert Hall at Fort Lewis College, 247-7657, www.durangoconcerts.com.

Open mic, 7-11 p.m., Steaming Bean, located

downstairs at the Irish Embassy Pub, 900 Main Ave., 403-1200, theirishembassypub.com.

Karaoke, 8 p.m., 8th Avenue Tavern, 509

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East Eighth Ave., 259-8801.

The Durango Western Music and Vaudeville Show, 7 p.m., Henry Strater

Theatre, 699 Main Ave., 375-7160.

Zobomazé, 9:30 p.m., Balcony Backstage, 600 Main Ave., Suite 205.

Blossoms galore watercolor art show, lunch and dinner, featuring Veryl

Nadya Rosenbaum, The Farm Bistro, 34 West Main Street, Cortez, 565-3834.

Saturday 10th Annual Tour de Farms, 7:30 a.m., Ska Brewing Co., 225 Girard St., www.thegardenprojectswcolorado.org/tourdefarms2016.

Railfest: Railroadiana, 9 a.m. to 7 p.m.,

Continued on Page 22

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Lunch Specials Everyday: 11:30-3:30

ALEHOUSE & KITCHEN

Dustin Burley playing live on Friday 8/26 - 6-10pm

~Monday & Thursday $2 Draws~ ~Monday - Local’s Day - 25% Off Appetizers~ ~Tuesday - Bingo Night~ ~Wednesday - Game Day - $3 Wells & $2 off Local Wine~ ~Celebrate First Tap Friday - New Beer Release & Live Music~ ~Happy Hour 3:00pm-6:00pm $3 Wells, $1 off Beers & Select Appetizers 25% off~

[happening] There’s gonna be a comedy throwdown It’s the moment a bunch of local, budding improv comedians have been working and waiting for the past month: The Durango DOT Comedy Slamfest.

Comedic supremacy is on the line as the newbies are split into two teams and compete in front of a panel of judges as they vie for the coveted – and completely awesome – champion mask.

Doors open at 7:30 p.m. and the show starts at 8 Saturday at the Durango Arts Center, 802 East Second Ave. Admission is $10, with $2 Ska drafts available.

From Page 21 free admission, Durango & Silverton Narrow Gauge Railroad, 479 Main Ave. (next to the Railroad Museum), www.durangotrain.com/ events/railfest, 888-872-4607.

Tuesday

UFC 202: Diaz vs. McGregor 2, 6 p.m.,

Irish Embassy Pub, 900 Main Ave., 403-1200, www.theirishembassypub.com.

Karaoke, 8 p.m., 8th Avenue Tavern, 509 The Black Velvet Duo, 5-9 p.m., Animas

tonight?

Blossoms galore watercolor art show, lunch and dinner, featuring Veryl

Wednesday

Live Music with Rob Webster, Irish

The Black Velvet Trio - Community Concerts in the Secret Garden, 5-7:30

Baconstein’s Monster with the Eyelid Kid, 9:30 p.m., Balcony Backstage, 600

Main Ave., Suite 205.

Sunday Yoga in the Park, 10 a.m., all-level class,

Buckley Park, 12th Street and Main Ave. Henry Stoy, piano, 10 a.m.-1 p.m., Jean-

Pierre Bakery, 601 Main Ave., 385-0122.

Irish music jam session, 12:30 p.m.,

p.m., Rochester Hotel Secret Garden, 726 East Second Ave.

Bluegrass Jam, 6-9 p.m., Irish Embassy Pub, 900 Main Ave., 403-1200, theirishembassypub.com.

Two-step dance lessons, 6:30-7:30 p.m., $10, Wild Horse Saloon, 601 East Second Ave., 799-8832.

Geeks Who Drink trivia, 8:30 p.m., BREW

Pub & Kitchen, 117 W. College Drive, 259-5959.

Pub quiz, 6:30 p.m., Irish Embassy Pub, 900

Main Ave., 403-1200.

Irish Embassy Pub, 900 Main Ave., 403-1200, www.theirishembassypub.com.

Pingpong and poker tournament, 8

Jazz church (experienced musician drop-in session), 6 p.m., Derailed Pour

Karaoke with DJ Crazy Charlie, 9 p.m.,

East Eighth Ave., 259-8801.

The Durango Western Music and Vaudeville Show, 7 p.m., Henry Strater

Theatre, 699 Main Ave., 375-7160.

Monday Four Corners Arts Forum, 9 a.m., KDUR

91.9/93.9 FM, www.kdur.org.

Happy Hour Yoga, 5:30-6:30 p.m., Ska

to the DGO calendar with

ery, 139 East Fifth Street.

The Durango Western Music and Vaudeville Show, 7 p.m., Henry Strater

Karaoke, 8 p.m., 8th Avenue Tavern, 509

+ Add an Event

Ave., 259-9018.

Lacey Black, 6-8:30 p.m., Fifth Street Eat-

Nadya Rosenbaum, The Farm Bistro, 34 West Main Street, Cortez, 565-3834.

House, 725 Main Ave., 247-5440, www.derailedpourhouse.com.

Your #1 source for what’s going on around Durango dgomag.com/calendar

Open Mic Night, 8 p.m., Moe’s, 937 Main

River Café in the Doubletree Hotel.

Embassy Pub, 900 Main Ave., 403-1200, www. theirishembassypub.com.

DGO

Blossoms galore watercolor art show, lunch and dinner, featuring Veryl

iAM MUSIC Fest, 11 a.m.-1 a.m., multiple stages and locations, downtown Durango, www.iammusicfest.com.

Theatre, 699 Main Ave., 375-7160.

Where should we

light Lounge, 937 Main Ave., 259-9018.

Nadya Rosenbaum, The Farm Bistro, 34 West Main Street, Cortez, 565-3834.

East Eighth Ave., 259-8801.

(970) 382-9664 • DOWNSTAIRS AT 640 MAIN AVENUE

Monday Night Blues Jam with Missy and the Bluetones, 7-10 p.m., Moe’s Star-

Henry Stoy, piano, 10 a.m.-1 p.m., Jean-

Pierre Bakery, 601 Main Ave., 385-0122.

Try Our Famous Lady Falcon Burger

Main Ave., 403-1200, theirishembassypub.com.

Brewing Co., 225 Girard St., yoga and a pint of beer for $10, www.skabrewing.com.

Spoken Word, 7-9 p.m., Steaming Bean, located downstairs at the Irish Embassy Pub, 900

p.m., Moe’s, 937 Main Ave., 259-9018.

Wild Horse Saloon, 601 East Second Ave., 3752568.

Blossoms galore watercolor art show, lunch and dinner, featuring Veryl

Nadya Rosenbaum, The Farm Bistro, 34 West Main Street, Cortez, 565-3834.

Submissions To submit listings for publication in DGO and dgomag.com, go to www.swscene.com and click “Add Your Event,” fill out the form with all your event info and submit. Listings at swscene.com will appear both at dgomag.com and in our weekly print edition.

Posting events at swscene.com is free and takes about one business day to process.

22 | Thursday, August 18, 2016 • • •••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

Horoscope ARIES (March 21 to April 19)

LEO (July 23 to Aug. 22)

The Full Moon could create problems with your kids, or your friends or even a romantic partner. Your best choice is to chill out.

The only Full Moon opposite your sign all year is taking place. This will create some emotional excitement or tension between you and partners and close friends. (But you still can enjoy this day!)

TAURUS (April 20 to May 20) You are caught between the demands of home and family versus the demands of your job and your career.

(You can’t ignore home and family.)

GEMINI (May 21 to June 20) Be careful because this is an accident-prone week for your sign since you or someone else might be distracted. Be calm and be aware.

CANCER (June 21 to July 22)

Bizarro

Disputes about finances, possessions, debt and inheritances might come to a head. It’s important to know what you really want before you agree to anything.

VIRGO (Aug. 23 to Sept. 22) Be patient with co-workers because the Full Moon’s energy makes everyone a bit antsy and easily annoyed.

Therefore, stay calm. Be a role model for others.

LIBRA (Sept. 23 to Oct. 22) Don’t try to persuade a friend to agree with you. Just agree to disagree. Likewise, your relationships with children might be challenging because of the Full Moon’s energy.

Go slowly.

SCORPIO (Oct. 23 to Nov. 21)

Like Taurus, you feel challenged by juggling the demands of home and family versus career and job. However, unlike Taurus, you cannot ignore your career, job and public reputation.

SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22 to Dec. 21) Avoid controversial subjects like politics, religion and racial issues because they quickly will lead to an argument. (Emotions run high during a Full Moon.)

CAPRICORN (Dec. 22 to Jan. 19) Try not to get carried away with disputes about shared property, inheritances and financial matters today because the Full Moon is a tough day for having important discussions. Easy does it.

AQUARIUS (Jan. 20 to Feb. 18) The only Full Moon in your sign all year is taking place. Naturally, this makes you more emotional, which can

rebound off close friends and partners.

Oh well.

PISCES (Feb. 19 to March 20) Issues at work and conversations with co-workers might be frustrating because of the Full Moon energy. However, who knows? Things might flow smoothly. Fingers crossed!

BORN THIS WEEK You are a confident, outgoing leader. Others admire your courage and charisma. You are knowledgeable and well-informed because you are curious about many things. It’s important to know that you will benefit from dealing with others this year. In other words, your success lies in interacting with other people. Make friends. Join clubs and organizations. Your social activities will be mutually beneficial. © 2016 King Features Syndicate Inc.

[pages]

weekly bestsellers Aug. 7 – Aug. 13 »»1. Harry Potter and the Cursed Child, by J.K. Rowling, John Tiffany, Jack Thorne (Hardcover) »»2. The Girl on the Train, by Paula Hawkins (Paperback) »»3. Sixty Meters to Anywhere, by Brendan Leonard (Paperback) »»4. Dark Matter, by Blake Crouch (Hardcover) »»5. A Man Called Ove, by Fredrik Backman (Paperback) »»6. Tribe, by Sebastian Junger (Hardcover) »»7. Mushrooms of the Rocky Mountain Region, by Vera Stucky Evenson (Paperback) »»8. The Underground Railroad,

by Colson Whitehead (Hardcover) »»9. After You, by Jojo Moyes (Paperback) »»10. A Child’s First Book of Trump, by Michael Ian Black (Hardcover)

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THREE DAYS, TONS OF FUN AND

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