Women and Comedy

art entertainment food drink music nightlife Thursday, August 11, 2016

DGO With comedian Paula Poundstone coming, we explore humor and the fairer sex

WOMEN AND COMEDY

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Also: Get Smart about tattooing, pairing shots & beers, the waitress workout, the virtues of natural fabrics, Cheech & Chong, and insider info from an actress

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STAFF

What’s inside Volume 1 Number 41

August 11, 2016

Chief Executive Officer

10 Inside the actress studio

Douglas Bennett V.P. of Finance and Operations

Karina Wolfe returns to her hometown to star in a Mona Wood-Patterson-directed Merely Players production of “Collected Stories.” We spoke to her about how brutal the acting industry is and her advice for young actor hopefuls.

Bob Ganley V.P. of Advertising David Habrat V.P. of Marketing Kricket Lewis Founding Editors

4

From the Editor

4

Love it or Hate it

6

Sound

Downtown Lowdown

8

Beer

David Holub

9

Serving

Editor/ designer/ art director

16 Movies

Amy Maestas

11 The virtues of natural

fabrics when it’s rainy

David Holub dholub@bcimedia.com 375-4551 Staff writer Anya Jaremko-Greenwold anya@bcimedia.com 375-4546 Contributors Katie Cahill Taylor Ferraro Christopher Gallagher

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Get Smart about tattooing They’re not just for pirates, sailors and unsavories. Hell, your mom probably has at least three. But if you, like our intrepid writer, don’t have any, let Bob Lackner of Your Flesh Tattoo tell you all about getting inked.

Bryant Liggett The Real Jon E. Lynch Heather Narwid Cooper Stapleton Cyle Talley Shelley Walchak Robert Alan Wendeborn Advertising

Deal with the monsoon torrents of our wet, hot Colorado August being stylish and comfortable with tips from Style Fetish on a few amazing natural fabrics to wear during this damp part of summer.

19 Strain review returns Sponsored by Colorado Grow, which reviews Ghost Train Haze.

Reader Services 375-4570

DGO is a free weekly publication distributed by Ballantine Communications Inc., and is available for one copy per person. Taking more than five copies of an edition from a distribution location is illegal and is punishable by law according to Colorado Revised Statute 18-9-314.

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17 Pages 18 Weed

Seeing Through the Smoke 18

Review 19

Netflix and chill ‑ 420 edition 19

20 “Savage” Love 21 Happening 23 Horoscope/ puzzles/ Bizarro

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Album Review 7

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The waitress workout I’ve always been a sucker for killing two birds with one stone. What I really appreciate about being a waitress is the fact that I get in a six-hour, low-impact workout while making money.

Tell us what you think!

Got something on your mind? Have a joke or a story idea or just something that the world needs to know?

Send everything to editor@dgomag.com

ON THE COVER Emily Roos takes a moment out of her workday to sport some hilariously wacky Groucho glasses.

Photo illustration by Jerry McBride/BCI Media and David Holub/DGO

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[ love it or hate it ]

David Holub |DGO editor

Are there more funny men?

Yes, says science. Here’s why

Y

ou might be likened to a caveman if you actually think women aren’t funny. Or that women aren’t as funny as men.

However, there is scientifically-backed reasoning for the perception that there are more funny men than funny women, which might account for why, historically at least, there are more male stand-ups than female. It all has to do with social constructs that incentivize men to be funny (or at least try to be) and for women, well, to not be funny. My theory is that it comes down to one underlying reality: intelligence and male insecurity.

Let me explain.

The first time I remember being rewarded for being funny was in first grade, when the teacher allowed me to stand in front of the class and “talk like a Texan.” With two Texans-turned-Colorado-transplants as parents, apparently I had been working on my Southern accent from a young age.

From my hazy 6-year-old memory, my impression consisted mainly of me saying things like, “Hah, Ah’m from Taxas,” to the giggling delight of the class and the doting eyes of my dreamy early 20s teacher.

A comedian was born. And from then on, humor was my way into people’s hearts, the way I got people to like me. But more than anything, humor was my most reliable strategy for winning the attention and affection of the ladies.

My experience is not unique, but rather consistent species-wide. As showcased in a compelling article in “The Atlantic,” a 2011 study published in the journal “Intelligence” found that “a good sense of humor is sexually attractive, perhaps because it reveals intelligence, creativity, and other ‘good genes’ or ‘good parent’ traits.” The study indicated that general and verbal intelligence predicted humor production (meaning more attempts at humor, regardless of how funny these attempts were) and that men showed more adeptness at humor production (again, not funnier humor per se, but more attempts at being funny).

So, as dudes, we learn that being funny is sexy and so we make more jokes. However, the “Intelligence” study didn’t say that humor is attractive only to women,

but both men and women. So why do guys try to be funny more than women? It may have to do with how each gender appreciates humor in potential mates.

A 2006 study found that while both men and women appreciate a sense of humor in their partner, women tend to like men who are equally receptive to the woman’s humor AND who are adept at being funny themselves. Guys? They essentially want a partner who laughs at their jokes.

So how does intelligence fit in to all this? And why are men more likely to be incentivized to be funny more than women? Like in many areas, our actions are culturally and biologically defined by the pressure to find a mate and reproduce.

And one thing that is more attractive to women and less attractive to men in male-female interaction is intelligence.

A 2015 study found that, in theory or when presented with a hypothetical situation, men show greater attraction toward women they perceive to be smarter than themselves. However, in practice, say, on a date or any other concrete, interpersonal interaction, men are less attracted to women they think are smarter. Essentially, men say they like smart women, but when put to the test, they retreat to their oversized pickup trucks, their chests inflated, leaving that sexy-smart brain-vixen in the dust.

But back to the “Intelligence” study, which concluded that “the human sense of humor evolved at least partly through sexual selection as an intelligence-indicator.” If humor is a demonstration of intelligence and men are threatened by women’s intelligence AND are simultaneously rewarded romantically by being funny while women are all but penalized for doing the same, it stands to reason why there “are more funny men.”

My conclusion? This has everything to do with antiquated notions of masculinity, where many men feel the need to be the provider, the decision-maker, the smarter and stronger of the two. Anything else is emasculating and indicates weakness.

To those guys, keep clinging to your insecurities, keep passing up all these smart, funny women. Real men who are single and worth a damn will thank you.

Jay Leno Love it Jay Leno began hosting the “Tonight Show” in 1992, just as I entered high school. With limited access to stand-up on television then, Leno was one of the few comics I could see on a regular basis and, with his disarming charm and skewer-and-slay-with-a-smile wit, became a huge influence on my sense of humor and made him one of the best, in my young opinion.

But forget me, take it from the greatest, most transformative comedian ever: Jerry Seinfeld. On his web series “Comedians in Cars Getting Coffee,” Seinfeld says, simply, “Jay is one of the greatest stand-up comedians I have ever seen.”

When you host a network show for almost 20 years you have to be likable, palatable and adhere to certain broadcast standards. This might give the air of bland or safe comedy, which has always dogged Leno. But it shows how Leno worked within confines and was still funny night after night. It also indicates just how durable Jay Leno was as a comedian, generating comedy and performing in front of millions who kept coming back for decades. He had to be doing something right, ending his “Tonight Show” stint as the No. 1 late-night talk show. Leno was also widely known inside and out as a nice, generous average guy, despite his celebrity. Doesn’t the world need more of those?

But back to Seinfeld, who said, “I always tell people that I learned comedy from Jay.” That’s argument enough for me.

— David Holub

Hate it I’ve heard Jay Leno used to be good, back before he took over the “Tonight Show.” I can’t vouch for that – I was either unborn or too young. I do know Leno stole “Tonight” from David Letterman (a vastly more talented host) in the ’90s and later refused to retire when NBC wanted to replace him with Conan O’Brien (another more likable comedian).

None of that drama would influence my admiration, though, if only Leno was funny. But he’s not. He’s vanilla. His jokes are safe. His interviews are insincere. He sucks up to guests instead of challenging them.

He’s not hip and silly like Fallon, nerdy and lovable like Conan, suavely amiable like Craig Ferguson, or sassy like Letterman. He doesn’t even pull off funny bits like Kimmel’s “Celebrities Read Mean Tweets” (for the record, I don’t think Kimmel is a funny host, either).

Sure, Fallon ass-kisses, but at least he seems genuinely delighted by pop culture trends. And before you accuse me of ageism: Letterman was an old fart too, and he was my favorite. He admitted to being out of touch. He mocked young, sexy celebrities to their faces. (Like when he discovered Justin Bieber didn’t know what the Sistine Chapel is.) He never tried to seem cool, as Leno so feebly does.

Leno wants to appeal to everybody. But when you stand for nothing, you fall for anything. You’re a coward. He has whined endlessly about how the late-night game screwed him – and he’s made a fair few enemies. When that many people in your industry dislike you, it’s a bad sign. “He totally sold out,” Kimmel has said. “He was a master chef who opened a Burger King.”

— Anya Jaremko-Greenwold

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[Expert Advice on Trivial Affairs]

Get Smart | Cyle Talley To see examples of Bob Lackner’s tattoo work, go to dgomag.com

Tattooing

They’re not just for pirates, sailors and unsavories. Hell, your mom probably has at least three. But if you, like our intrepid writer, don’t have any, let Bob Lackner of Your Flesh Tattoo tell you all about getting inked.

How long have you been tattooing?

Is all that time charged?

Absolutely not. That’s what people don’t think about. They get intimidated by our hourly wage and think, “Oh my god! That’s so much money!” But I could put 20 hours into a drawing, and I don’t get paid for that. That’s all part of the hourly wage. I’m happy to redraw and redraw and redraw. I want you to be absolutely, 100 percent sure that’s what you want.

Eighteen years. It was blowing up when I was gettin’ into it, but it’s a completely different industry now because of the TV shows and whatnot. All of a sudden, housewives are in the shop, and not just the unsavory characters.

Have the places where people want tattoos changed?

What are your pet peeves?

Oh, absolutely. It used to be a first tattoo would be smaller and in very easy areas – arms, legs. Nowadays, 18-year-old kids are coming in wanting huge, painful rib area tattoos, just goin’ big.

What are the most painful places to get a tattoo?

General rule of thumb is anytime you’ve got bones involved, you’re gonna feel it. The ribs are unique, ’cause it vibrates your innards.

When bones are involved, you’re gonna earn it. But then there’re those areas you don’t even think of – back of the knee, armpit- those tucked away areas that aren’t exposed to the elements as much. That’s tender skin.

Ever been freaked out by somebody’s body? [groans and shudders] – Is that an answer? It’s like being a doctor. There’s a job you have to do, and there’s somebody who’s putting their confidence in you. You want to make them feel comfortable and, no matter where you’re tattooing, it’s just skin. The private areas are the most difficult to work on and you’re more focused on getting a good, clean tattoo and you don’t even think about what you’re looking at.

David Holub/DGO

»» Your Flesh tattoo artist Bob Lackner.

Any tattoos you’ve given that you regret being tied to?

There’s definitely certain tattoos that aren’t the most artistic, but at the end of the day, you’ve gotta remember that part of being a tattooer is providing a service for people. You might not think it’s the coolest tattoo, but it’s what that person wants and is going to be stoked to wear, so you do it to the best of your ability and make a nice, clean tattoo. You give them a good experience. How do you regret that?

If I’m going in tomorrow, what do I expect?

It’s important to know that it’s a process. You’re not going to walk in, and walk out tattooed. You’ll schedule a consultation with an artist and then it’ll take time to develop the artwork – sometimes up to a month. I like to get my clients in and work back and forth with them on the art, to make sure we’re on the same page. Once I have the green light, I go into greater detail, and then check in again. If there’re changes, we make changes. Then, when we get exactly what we want, we schedule your sitting and get you tattooed.

I really enjoy working with clients, but there are etiquettes that need to be talked about.

There are certain ways to conduct yourself in a shop – one of which being when people bring an entourage of people. I get it. It’s helpful to be distracted, but having seven or eight friends in a shop is – OK, it’s distracting you from the pain, but it’s also very distracting to the artist who’s trying to concentrate on your tattoo.

How would you like it if I came to your job with a bunch of my friends and hovered around your desk as you were trying to finish your TPS reports? How productive would you be?

My advice is bring one person and let the rest of your friends see it when it’s done. Haggling over price is not kosher. This is not something you want to haggle over! I’ll ask during the consultation if you have a budget. I can draw the design and add more or less detail to make it suit your budget. Just tell me, and we’ll make it work. But if I draw up a tattoo that’s going to cost $600 and you say, “Well, I can do $400,” you’re haggling for something that’s going to be on your body forever. Bad idea.

Any recent jobs that are satisfying?

That’s a daily basis thing. There’re so many good clients in Durango that come through and work with you, and let you do fun projects. I’m very fortunate in that most of the clients who come in are willing to let me run with their ideas, put my creative spin on it, let me have fun with it. That’s super satisfying. I couldn’t ask for much more.

Cyle Talley would like to get a tattoo, but knows he’s too much of a commitophobe. Know thyself, right? If there’s something you’d like to Get Smart about, email him at: cyle@cyletalley.com

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[sound]

Downtown Lowdown | Bryant Liggett

Anniversary lets Warsaw Poland Bros. relive ska’s old days

C

hris Poland has made a living out of playing party music. The now-California-based musician led ska band Warsaw Poland Bros. for years, and more recently the California Celts and Kalifornia Krauts.

They are all bands that manage to evoke a good-time vibe, provide an atmosphere of general revelry, pack a dance floor and perhaps drain a venue of its beer supply.

But it all started with Warsaw Poland Bros., the ska band started by Chris and his brother Aaron 25 years ago in Northern Arizona. They quickly started playing shows around Flagstaff, and soon after made friends and fans in towns around the Southwest, including Durango.

Warsaw Poland Bros. will perform tonight (Thursday) at the Animas City Theatre, with local ska band Busters Ghost and DJ I-Gene, celebrating 25 years of making and playing ska music.

There was a time when they were in Durango on a quarterly basis.

They’d play old venues like the Summit, or the San Juan Room, or The Iron Horse, or there would be impromptu shows in the tasting room at the old Ska Brewery when it was located on Turner Drive in Bodo Park.

They were practically locals, becoming part of Ska Brewing’s “League of Justice.” In the brewery’s early days, it was friends and musicians who helped build the business. The League of Justice was a list of people who would help with beer production, or ska bands that would come through town, acknowledged in the beer’s packaging.

Courtesy of Warsaw Poland Bros.

»» Warsaw Poland Bros. will perform tonight (Thursday) at the Animas City Theatre with local ska band Busters Ghost and DJ I-Gene, celebrating 25 years of making and playing ska music.

Bryant’s best Thursday: Warsaw, Buster’s Ghost, DJ I-Gene, 9 p.m. $12. Animas City Theatre, 128 E. College Drive.

Information: 799-2281.

Monday: Missy and the Bluetones host an open blues jam, 7 p.m., no cover. Moe’s, 937 Main Ave. Information: 259-9018.

“We were very lucky, we were one of the first bands to be mentioned on the bottom of their six-packs,” said Chris Poland in a recent interview.

“When you looked on the bottom on the cardboard it thanked bands, and we were one of several bands listed there. They were very generous.”

They were road-dogs, playing up to 300 dates a year and going from coast

to coast and sometimes Hawaii, which eventually took its toll. Chris relocated to California and took up residency playing music with The California Celts, a steady gig of shows closer to home without the rigors of non-stop touring. But as their 25th Anniversary approaches, there was a calling to bring in some past members and book a tour, with more short tours to come.

“Ska is coming back, and we’ll hit while the iron is hot,” said Chris.

“My brother Aaron said ‘Chris, we have more fans in Colorado than anywhere else.’ We’d spend three to five weeks a year, several times a year in Colorado. Winter and summer, we’d live there on tour. This 25-year anniversary only happens once. I didn’t know how much interest there would be, but I managed to book a week-

long tour in 40 minutes. There was demand there.”

For this tour, Warsaw will have both Poland brothers, and original members Chris Woodward and Cameron Tuttle. Members of the California Celts will round out the band.

“Recently at practice was the first day that it sounded like Warsaw,” Chris said. “It did bring me back to the old days, and hearing why that music was special to us and others back then, it wasn’t just a passing trend. I got that feeling off the song ‘Rude Girl,’ which my brother wrote.

We’re starting to sound like the old days, so we’re just about there.”

Bryant Liggett is a freelance writer and KDUR station manager. liggett_b@fortlewis.edu.

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Downtown 11th & Main

[sound] What’s new

Fresh &

Available: Now, via Joyful Noise Recordings as a digital download, compact disc, cassette tape, on standard black vinyl LP and while supplies last, a limited-edition gold vinyl LP. Sorry friends: The hyper-limited 300 hand-numbered, clear-vinylwith-gold-rays LP sold out some time ago.

Local

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Big Business,“Command Your Weather”

HELP WANTED-FULL TIME DRIVER

Durango has a ridiculous number of Melvins fans. Whenever the band plays New Mexico, no matter if it is Santa Fe or Albuquerque, there is a strong traveling contingent from our small mountain town. It’s impressive, I suppose. I see nearly every fan of heavier-leaning rock music I know at these shows down South. I think it’s great. I mean, I’m there as well, right? An early show I was allowed to see without parental supervision as a young teen was The Melvins opening for Primus. I’d even suggest that The Melvins were better that night in the fall of ’93.

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HOWEVER. I’m just going to get this out of the way now. Especially considering the inexplicably rabid, sometimes-not-always-mind-you narrow-minded fan base that would kill in the name of Buzzo: I prefer Big Business to The Melvins.

This makes little sense to me, but rock music doesn’t always have to make sense.

Big Business is the project of the Melvins rhythm section of Jared Warren (bass/lead vocals) and Coady Willis (drums/ backing vocals) that has been slowing things down since 2005. The music is still heavy, the riffage is still tight, and they even bring in guest guitarists to round out tours and records both. Most, if not all, Melvins fans are already well aware of Big Business. Now the rest of you can enjoy the pummeling.

If it’s any consolation, I prefer Willis’ recently-resurrected Murder City Devils to both Big Business AND The Melvins. So, you know ... yeah.

HOME OF THE COOLEST MARGARITAS IN TOWN HAPPY HOUR

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For fans of sludge rock, stoner metal, The Melvins, Queens of the Stone Age, Mastodon, Baroness or Red Fang — Jon E. Lynch KDUR_PD@fortlewis.edu

New at Southwest Sound Aug. 12 1. Atmosphere,“Fishing Blues” Slug and Ant always bring something fresh to the table of hip-hop, and while the title of their newest album may lead one to think they are content to rest on their laurels, do not be concerned. If the single “Pure Evil” is any indicator, the album will be a slow burn that coalesces into something magical.

2. Rae Sremmurd,“Sremmlife 2” Swae Lee and Slim Jimmi return with another album full of enough bangers to break your neck. “Sremmlife 1” debuted at No. 5 on Billboard, so this new one is sure to heat up the charts as well.

3. Young The Giant,“Home of the Strange” The third record from this indiepop outfit, “Home of the Strange” brings in

an interesting blend of electronics and subdued guitars and drums into the fold.

Finding a nice balance of the mellow tracks of their self-titled album and the energetic nature of “Mind Over Matter,” “Home of the Strange” is poised to bring the group some new fans.

4. Of Montreal,“Innocence Reaches” If you want weird, you got it. If you want atmosphere, you got it. If you want pop music to confuse you, then by god grab up this record.

5. Thee Oh Sees,“Weird Exits” You never really know what to expect when it comes to Thee Oh Sees. You can expect it to sound like it was recorded in a smoky garage, and to be drenched in reverb. But beyond that, if you like lo-fi, and you like garage rock, then you should take the plunge with them, and expect nothing but dreams.

—— Cooper Stapleton

237203

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[beer]

First Draughts | Robert Alan Wendeborn

Shot and a beer: When you’re behind on your drinking and need to catch up

O

ne of my favorite scenes in all of cinema is when in “Dumb and Dumber,” Lloyd Christmas and Harry Dunne order four boilermakers for a crew of rural ruffians, then proceeded to skip out on the check. When I first watched the movie at the ripe age of 13, I laughed at the rouse of the whole thing: Those dumb farmers are getting tricked by even dumber people from the city! And every time I watch “Dumb and Dumber,” to this day, I laugh about some other crazy detail in the scene: Are these laid back country folk drinking hard booze in a diner? Is it even noon? What kind of grown man goes by the name “Seabass”? What kind of beer are they serving at this tiny little diner? And what kind of whiskey? And will that beer/whiskey combo pair well with the soup du jour?

The term “boilermaker” doesn’t really get used a lot, but it is frequently ordered, whether you know it or not. It’s a shot of whiskey and pint of beer. An Irish Car Bomb or shot of Jameson and pint of Guinness is a boilermaker. A pint of PBR and a shot of Fireball? Boilermaker. Maker’s Mark and a Budweiser? Boilermaker. Bacardi Limon and Citradelic Tangerine IPA? Uh, maybe?

I’m inclined to call it all the same thing, because the effect is the same: You’re behind on your drinking and need to catch up. You may not be able to officially call it a boilermaker, but it’s going to get the job done. Either way you order a shot and a beer, you got to pick your poison well and there’s a few ways to do that.

The most common way is to go by price, and price is going to vary by region. When I lived in Portland, Rainier Beer was the cheapest tall boy in town and Old Crow the cheapest whiskey. In Chicago, it’ll probably be Old Style, and in New York, I had really cheap Old German Boy. There’s really cheap Tito’s Vodka across the South and Southwest and really cheap beer in general across the Midwest. Basically, you’re looking for the cheapest

liquor and the cheapest beer and that is your boilermaker and there is nothing to be ashamed of about that.

The other way to go is to pair your regional boozes. In Durango, that’s definitely a Ska and a Peach Street.

Two out of the three owners of Ska are also owners of Peach Street Distillery in Palisade. Some of the combos would be crazy, but I think an Apricot Shandy and a Modus Hoperandi would go perfectly together. You might also try the Soiled Dove by Durango Craft Spirits if you’re out at one of the local pubs. And if you’re on the front range, pick any of your awesome breweries, and order a Stranahan’s.

The last, and my favorite way to pair my poisons, is to go all matchy-matchy. Like a 4-year-old picking out their own clothes, you’re going to pair the grain or flavor of your booze with the grain or flavor of your beer. Want a nice tropical pairing? Try Liliko’i Kepolo and Malibu. Liliko’i is a passion fruit witbier from Avery that has a strong acidic bite that would pair perfectly with the coconut sweetness of the Malibu (this would also be a good matchy-matchy pairing with Death

by Coconut by Oskar Blues). If you’re looking for something that’s more of typical boilermaker, try Bulleit Rye with Red Ryeot by La Cumbre Brewing (this actually sounds like the best possible combo so far).

In all honestly, if you’re drinking shots and beers in rounds, chances are it won’t matter what anything tastes like after the second round, but hopefully you’re nice and caught up by then. If not, and you’re still trying to catch up to that bad case of liver failure, then just switch to Long Islands and get it all over with.

Illustration by David Holub/DGO

Robert Alan Wendeborn is a former cellar operator at Ska Brewing and current lead cellar operator at Tin Roof Brewing in Baton Rouge, Louisiana.

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[Serving] Confessions of a 20-something waitress Taylor Ferraro

Five-plus miles per shift: Here’s how serving is a workout

I

’ve always been a sucker for killing two birds with one stone. I do calf-raises while I brush my teeth, listen to audiobooks while cleaning the house and watch “Orange is the New Black” (or my latest Netflix indulgence) while I’m on the elliptical. It would only make sense that my job supports this habit.

What I really appreciate about being a waitress is the fact that I get in a six-hour, low-impact workout while making money.

When I first started serving I didn’t understand why I was so tired. Sure I was working hard, but I didn’t take into account the actual mileage I was putting in every night at the restaurant. Out of curiosity I started wearing a pedometer to work and was surprised by the outcome. In six shifts, approximately 33 restaurant hours, I had walked just over 27 miles, which averages out to about 5.4 miles a day!

Already having somewhat of an interest in fitness, I decided to figure out how many calories I was burning an hour, a shift, a week, etc. An average person weighing 150 pounds burns about 100 calories per mile. This works out to burning about 600 calories a shift and 3,600 calories per week, from the walking alone. Of course the weekly mileage will vary depending on how busy the server is, how big the restaurant is and how many times you forget to bring a side of (fill in the blank) to your customer (guilty).

Now it’s time to incorporate the lifting, the tray holding and the cleaning that is done on a nightly basis. The set up includes refilling butter containers, stocking to-go boxes, wiping down booths and chairs, polishing silver, folding napkins and putting dishes away. These simple tasks take about 45 minutes to complete, and in my mind are considered the “warm up” of the workout. My muscles have been gently woken and are gearing up for what’s to come.

The next four hours consist of introductions, cutting bread, ringing in food, dropping off food, SMILING, refilling beverages, clearing dirty dishes, getting a side of ranch, getting a side of ranch and getting another side of ranch. I like to think of this as the bulk of the workout. And if I’m really busy, or when it’s nearly 100 degrees outside and the air-conditioning unit is broken, I even break

Illustration by David Holub/DGO

a lady-like sweat, liquid proof that my body is at work.

By 9 o’clock things begin to wind down. This is when the kitchen, waitstaff, dishwashers, busers and bartenders all put in the extra effort that they didn’t think they had. CLOSING TIME, aka the “cool down.” At this point in the night, I will make sure my section of the restaurant is clear and that tables have been wiped and reset. The final feat is disassembling the “best salad bar” in Durango.

The first step is removing all 33 containers from the salad bar so they can be refrigerated. Next, the kale is removed, and finally the ice.

After dumping the ice in the garbage, the salad bar gets a quick wash and wipe down and that does it. Again, not a difficult task, but it incorporates walking, squatting and lifting. I’ll consider it strength training ... hopefully Jillian Michaels would approve.

Still think this is crazy? I get it, waiting tables is no Ironman Triathlon. But it is a job that allows me the satisfaction of feeling exhausted and ready for a dark beer and some REM cycles when I get home. At the end of the night I can lie in bed, think about my day and safely say that though I didn’t get my normal cardio/ weight training workout in at the Rec Center, I still exercised. Cheers to doing it all over again tomorrow.

Taylor Ferraro provides five-star service and entertainment at the Red Snapper.

She is also a massage therapist and KDUR DJ. Contact her at tferr8@hotmail.com.

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[performing]

‘You have to find your identity outside of acting

IN ORDER TO SURVIVE’ »» A conversation with Durango native, LA-based actress Karina Wolfe Acting is one of the most competitive, belittling, exhausting lines of work you can possibly pursue. Karina Wolfe, who grew up in Durango but now lives in Los Angeles, knows the struggle better than most of us. Wolfe has returned to her hometown to star in a Mona Wood-Patterson-directed Merely Players production opening Aug. 12: Donald Marguiles’ play “Collected Stories,” about the complicated relationship between a writer and her student. It will be performed at the Durango Public Library and features only two characters (Wolfe and local actress and artist Maureen May) talking over a six-year period.

We spoke to Wolfe about how brutal the industry is and her advice for young actor hopefuls.

GO! What: “Collected Stories” presented by The Merely Players When: 6:30 p.m. Aug. 12, 13 (sold out), 17, 18, 19, 20; 1 p.m. Saturday, Aug. 20 Where: Durango Public Library Cost: $22 Tickets and more information: http:// merelyplayers.us/

Courtesy of Karina Wolfe

»» Actress Karina Wolfe as Lance Corporal Gentry in the film “Soul Stealer.”

How did you become interested in acting?

I was in ballet starting at 3 years old. When I was 9 or 10, my ballet teacher was like, ‘You’re more interested in playing the characters than learning the choreography. You should be an actor.’ Pretty much by middle school, I was obsessed. I love sinking in and discovering the truth that the writer left behind. Getting to touch an audience. You do the preparation, then wait for the mystery and the magic in the moment.

How does stage acting compare to film?

They’re both great in different ways. With theater, you get the chance to really live in it for an extended period of time. You get a lot more rehearsal, and dive a lot deeper with someone directing you. With film, they tell you where to stand and at what angles, but you have to do a lot of the work yourself. Then it’s nice, because you get to do it several times. You usually do it in little chunks.

What’s something people wouldn’t expect goes on behind the scenes of a film?

Just how many people are standing next to you, watching. There’s usually way more crew than cast. So even if it feels really intimate, there’s anywhere from six to 25 people in the room, staring at you. That’s something I had to get used to.

How is acting in LA different from acting in Durango?

There’s a lot more opportunity in LA, but it’s also harder to get those opportunities. There’s so many people fighting for even the non-paying student film

Courtesy of Karina Wolfe

»» Actress Karina Wolfe as Samantha in the film “Wichita.” with one line. So much of it becomes about selling yourself, playing the game, trying to get an agent, going to casting director workshops. But then you’re like, ‘Wait, I haven’t actually acted or fulfilled my artist’s soul in a while.’ If you live in a smaller community, a lot of the time you get to work more. In San Francisco I was working all the time, going from play to play. After a while I didn’t even really have to audition, people just know when you’re a strong actor and invite you to do shows.

There are a lot of people in LA seeking the fame and celebrity, not necessarily valuing the work or training.

And then it’s like, ‘Oh, everyone’s an actor, I have to think of something else to say.’ You have to find your identity outside of acting in order to survive.

Any advice for young people who want to get into the industry?

Take the time to find love in your life – whether it’s

with friends or family or a romantic partner. Surrounding yourself with people that make you happy, and getting some hobbies that make you happy, too, so you’re not putting all your eggs in one basket.

There’s a lot of rejection. Though you don’t have to look at it as rejection – just going out and finding the audition process part of the fun of acting and not having expectations. Which is hard. And knowing yourself, being confident; if you don’t get a part, it doesn’t mean you’re not an actor. Some of the best conversations I’ve had with people I respect and would love to work with someday happened through my restaurant, where I get to wait on a lot of celebrities. Some of the strongest connections have been made talking about politics, brewing kombucha or cooking. People want to talk to you as a person, not just as an actor trying to make an opportunity. So have other interests!

Do you have a dream role you’d like to play?

I love to play dark, emotionally-wounded characters.

Innocent, but damaged. Drug addicts and things like that. I’m not sure why; I think it’s because I feel pretty grounded in my life.

What’s something you don’t like about the industry?

It’s cruel. Especially in my range, like a white girl who looks in her 20s, it’s so saturated in LA. A lot of the times the part goes to the hot chick or someone who knows someone. It’s hard to get to the next step. It’s hard to get an agent without legit credits. You could be acting your whole life, but if you don’t have “CSI” or any recognizable movie credits, it’s hard to get an agent. Yet it’s also hard to get the auditions for those parts without representation! So it’s a catch-22 if you’re not well-connected, don’t have a famous family member, if you’re not extraordinarily beautiful or really rich. But it’s an exciting challenge. It’s definitely possible, it just takes a lot of work and time.

—— Anya Jaremko-Greenwold

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[Sartorial over-enthusiasm with Heather of Sideshow]

Style Fetish | Heather Narwid

When it’s damp outside, your fabrics should be natural

D

eal with the monsoon torrents of our wet, hot Colorado August being stylish and comfortable with tips from Style Fetish on a few amazing natural fabrics to wear during this damp part of summer.

Natural fabrics are far superior to synthetic, so-called “technical” fabrics.

My opinion is that “tech” fabrics are all basically overpriced, over processed, petroleum-based, plastic bags masquerading as fabric. Yuck! Humans deserve to have better next to our active skins, having had the miracle-fabric thing already figured out for ourselves for millennia, thank you very much.

Our intrepid nature has driven us to explore dramatic climates for thousands of years and we have done so with incredible success while wearing miraculous natural fabrics such as linen, wool and silk. Cellulose (plant) and protein (animal) fiber fabrics are sustainable, natural and take less chemical processing to manufacture than polyesters and other synthetics.

Here are some of Style Fetish’s favorites.

ture-regulating when worn in a shirtweight woven or knitted fabric. When damp, it does have a slight odor, but it’s a comforting smell like the inside of an Irish barn full of gentle, useful animals.

Wool dries fast, but more importantly, it will still retain a person’s body heat when wet. It is anti-microbial and won’t trap body-odor-stink like synthetic tech fabrics. I can’t get enough of ultra-thin wool and silk knit camisoles and tanks alone in summer or as layering pieces year round. Not all wool is itchy, either – Australian merino wool is incredibly soft as are wool-cashmere blends.

The only bummer about wool is its delicious taste to hole-chewing clothesmoths! Cloves, eucalyptus, rosemary and lavender as well as red cedar heartwood can be used as natural repellents to the common clothes-moth. I have found that vintage woolens treated with old-school, super-funky mothballs (aka naphtha) will repel moths but will forever reek of that icky, elderly haunted-house closet smell, which won’t come out via airing, soaking, dry-cleaning or yelling at it. So avoid secondhand wool garments that already smell weird.

Linen

Silk

Linen is the best fabric to be wet in.

Its made from the flax plant, one of humanity’s oldest cultivated plants. Firm, absorptive, natural fibers dry almost immediately but still feel good while wet against the skin (unlike clammy, plastic-y polyester tech fabrics). I love this ancient fabric mostly for the qualities of its “hand,” but also for the fact that we humans have been wearing it for millennia. Linen is the best fabric to wear on river trips, too. It is super-sturdy and tough, stretches when wet and dries perfectly broken-in. Don’t believe the hype about having to iron linen – hang it up right out of the dryer and let it have its signature, charmingly rumpled look.

Silk is another ancient fabric worn by people for millennia. Don’t get hung up on its dubious origins (worms) – silk is a comfy, classy, surprisingly-durable and versatile fiber that blends well with other fibers. Silk fabric in a raw or natural state does actually smell way weird when wet, but it’s a small price to pay. Thinly-woven silk is absorptive and temperature-regulating like wool and dries almost as quick.

So choose humanity’s tried-and-true natural fabrics over synthetics when you head outside. They honor our textile history and the sustainable critter friends who help us obtain these amazingly useful and comfortable fabrics.

Wool

Heather Narwid owns Sideshow, a vintage and modern clothing store for men and women located at 208 County Road 250 in Durango.

Wool has the reputation for being warm but it is actually more tempera-

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Comedian Paula Poundstone in Durango:

‘Most people who type

‘LOL’ ARE LYING’

By Anya Jaremko-Greenwold

P

DGO STAFF WRITER

aula Poundstone doesn’t look like anybody else.

She’s usually garbed in bright suspenders, wacky ties, fitted suits, snazzy shoes. A self-proclaimed asexual, her comedy doesn’t deal much with “being a woman” - she exists on a more androgynous playing field, joking chiefly about being a single mother (she became a foster parent in the ’90s, fostering eight kids and eventually adopting three). Her topics are benign and relatable: Her teenage son filling out a job application without knowing his own work experience, or how pressured she feels to eat both Pop Tarts in a pack to keep the second one from going stale. She told me she doesn’t talk about sex or romance because she’s simply not having any.

Poundstone put in the grunt work playing small clubs and theaters in the ’80s, rising to fame in the ’90s when she started appearing on “The Tonight with Jay Leno.” She went on to have a 13-year stint on NPR’s weekly news quiz show “Wait, Wait, Don’t Tell Me...” where she’s still a regular.

Female stand-ups are getting more (figurative) play than ever in 2016. Amy Schumer, Sarah Silverman and Chelsea Lately are just a few of the gals attempting to fill the hole left behind by deliciously-nasty Joan Rivers. Poundstone keeps on plugging too, performing year-round without posting controversial Instagrams or attending the comedy shows of her peers. In a way, she’s in her own world now: Removed from media kerfuffles. She seems serious, rarely smiley or flirtatious onstage. Poundstone plays it straight-laced and dignified. She’s got swagger – but she also (famously) owns 14 cats.

We spoke to Poundstone about how the Internet has changed comedy, whether gender impacts her job and why a live comedy show is much better than Pokémon Go.

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Tell me about being a woman in the comedy scene. Did you ever feel like it was a boy’s club?

I don’t know, because I haven’t been a male in the comedy scene! So it’s tough to say. I can tell you that when I started in Boston in ’79, there was a fairly misogynistic feel to the material a lot of people were doing. But people ask me all the time, ‘Is it harder to be a woman?’ I have no idea. I’m sure there were advantages sometimes, because in a group of performers that were all male made me unique. You’d have to isolate the variables and live life again, and I’m not sure I want to do that. My guess is, it’s a genderless job. It may have been more difficult being a woman before my time, like for Joan Rivers. There’s not a ton of early women standups. People say, ‘There’s so many more now,’ but I say there’s so many more comics now than before! My guess is, percentage-wise, we’re in exactly the same spot. You can’t swing a dead cat without hitting a stand-up comic these days.

What about balancing a successful career with being a family woman? You have lots of kids and you’re a single mother.

It’s challenging for anybody – when you’re doing one thing, you feel like you’re shortchanging the other. It’s a constant balancing act, and probably one that no one does successfully.

You always have a feeling that you’re somehow doing it wrong, but I think that’s just the human condition. Now my kids are older, so it’s not the same dynamic as before. But what I tried to do when they were younger was go out two to

GO! What: Paula Poundstone When: 7:30 p.m., Aug. 19, Where: Community Concert Hall at Fort Lewis College, 1000 Rim Drive, Durango Cost: $25-$34 For tickets: http://durangoconcerts.tix. com/Event.aspx?EventCode=864010

three nights a week, and then the rest of the time I was here to take them to school and help with homework. In some ways, if I had been a 9 to 5er, I would’ve missed a lot of the time too. But especially years ago, when the women stayed home and the men went to work, I have answered, without a doubt, which is harder: And the answer is, staying at home. Taking care of kids and the house is at least 50 times harder than being a stand-up, which is very satisfying, the most fun job in the world. From a brain-science point of view, it’s uplifting to be in a room full of people laughing for the night.

How has the industry changed since you’ve been in it?

Obviously the internet has changed things to some degree. In the old days, when there were three television channels, if a comic did “The Tonight Show,” the next day they were a star.

That has stopped. As there became more channels, and the pond wasn’t small anymore, it was hard to be a big fish. You didn’t have one place picking who the people went out to see. “The Tonight Show” hasn’t been for many years the kingmakers they once were. I haven’t worked

clubs in years, thank goodness, so I don’t know much about that anymore. I work theaters, generally speaking, and by myself. I don’t have other acts on with me. So when people ask, ‘How has comedy changed?’ I say I don’t know, because I don’t go see it. When you come home from being on the road, you don’t go ‘Guess what, mom’s going out to a club tonight to watch some comedy.’ It doesn’t go over very well. I did an awards show a couple months ago and I presented, and Kathy Griffin was hosting and I’d never seen her before – wouldn’t have known her if I tripped over her – but she was really funny, I thought she was great. That’s the only way I see anybody anymore.

You’re active on social media.

Have you seen it affect the way comedy is done or how comedians sell themselves?

I’d like to bag all that entirely. I think it’s so bad for us as a society. It’s snarky, it’s a bad way to communicate politics. It’s bad enough that people like sound bite stuff, but trying to put opinions into 140 characters… there’s a dangerous quality about it. People aren’t the brilliant writers they think themselves to be, so things tend to come out… it leads to name-calling and childish interaction, as opposed to well thought-out ideas that take more time to express. So yes, I’m a participant. Originally I thought it would be fun just to write jokes.

Then my manager and agent were like, ‘Well you need to tell people where you’re going to be!’ I loathe self-promotion. So there’s this horrible constant need to go, ‘I’m going to be Continued on Page 14

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[comedy] From Page 13

at the blah-blah-blah!’ You can be a brilliant comic, but if people don’t come to see you, it doesn’t do anybody any good. I have to help fill seats, that’s part of my job.

The other thing that’s interesting is, if you talk to a promoter, their job is to know that marketplace and how to advertise to get an audience. In the old days, people knew exactly what radio stations to go to, exactly what print sources, and they had a handle on how to fill a room. And now, whenever I ask promoters what their technique is, they always answer the same: They have no idea. With social media, it’s really hard to tell how people are actually getting the word. I’m not positive that all the tweeting and Facebooking does anything at all.

But now you just sort of throw everything up against the wall and see what sticks. It’s a funny time-suck, too. Like everybody else, I like to see how many people respond to a joke I put up.

And I’m not sure it’s the best use of everyone’s time.

You tweet a lot about politics and Donald Trump...

I think people are communicating ideas and opinions as if they were flipping off someone from their car. Everybody barks at one another. I realize both sides do stuff they shouldn’t do, but Trump is definitely responsible for the name-calling. That’s him. And also for stirring up a certain amount of fear. He didn’t design the system that allowed that to be very powerful, but in an odd serendipity that’s not a happy one, there’s the collision with this social media thing and so many disenfranchised people, and this guy coming along.

Even as you’re being sold to one theater or another, part of what they say is, ‘She has this many followers.’ It’s not enough to be really good at your job. I’m sure there’s brilliant musicians that we’ve never heard of. Having said that, one of the great joys of my job is being with crowds of people that have come to laugh for the night. Obviously there’s tons of diversions and YouTube stuff people can look at on their little machines all the time, but there is a qualitative difference in being with a group that’s laughing. It really is contagious.

Most people who type ‘LOL’ are lying. It’s a lovely expression, but I don’t think it’s true for a moment. Who laughs aloud at something you look at on a screen when you’re by yourself?

Probably not many people. I’m a huge Three Stooges fan, I’ve seen all those shorts easily 50 times a piece, and a few years back I took my kids to the Three Stooges Film Festival. When I watch them on TV or a DVD or something, I don’t know that I’ve ever laughed aloud. I’ve always acknowledged in my head that I thought it was funny. Whereas when I go to that film festival, they’re up on the huge screen, and I’m in this theater with other Three Stooges fans,

and it was HYSTERICALLY funny.

I think that’s been psychologically proven, that comedies are funnier in groups.

Isn’t that neat? We really do need one another. I realize we all get sick of each other, and trust me, if they were colonizing the moon I would blow someone to get my name on the list. But I do know that it’s a basic truth that we need one another.

Nature programmed us that way, and we respond better to comedy in a group than we do alone. It’s good for people to go out and see SOMETHING. And not [bleeping] stupid-ass Pokémon Go or whatever the hell that is. That’s not the same. That’s tantamount to not going out. The idea that anyone thinks it’s so exciting their children go out because of Pokémon Go is a testament to how far downhill we’ve gone.

When a female comedian like Ellen DeGeneres does stand-up that is very gender-neutral, then someone like Amy Schumer does standup that’s all about being a woman and her sexuality, it seems people are more critical of the latter. Have you purposefully tried to make your comedy applicable to anybody?

My act is very autobiographical.

I am who I am, and the truth is, if I had sex I’d talk about it on stage all the time. I just don’t. It’s not a focus in my life, so it doesn’t come up much. But it wasn’t by design. On stage I talk about what happened that day, I talk about me, me, me.

My kids, my car, my experience.

And I guess my experience is fairly gender-neutral. It doesn’t feel like being a woman has a lot to do with it one way or the other.

But I think it’s great when other comedians do that! I don’t think there should be any subjects that can’t be touched.

So nothing is off limits in comedy?

I don’t think so. Funny things are funny. It doesn’t mean that everything someone says on every subject is funny. But it’s also totally a matter of opinion.

There are no rules.

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[Command-Z]

Anya Jaremko-Greenwold | DGO

For a closer inspection of female stand-up comedians (are they ACTUALLY funny?) and the varied setbacks they face, check out our video on dgomag.com. Starring Joan Rivers, Sarah Silverman, Amy Schumer, Chelsea Handler, and more.

Are there double standards for funny females?

T

»» Amy Schumer Associated Press file

here are three basic breeds of female stand-ups. First: The women whose routines are benign, inoffensive and gender-neutral (e.g. Ellen DeGeneres, Tig Notaro, Paula Poundstone). Although they’ve all made bold statements at some point – Ellen revealing she’s gay, Paula confessing she’s asexual, Tig going topless on stage – they rarely piss anybody off. Second type: The sexual, bawdy, graphic jokers (e.g. Amy Schumer, Sarah Silverman, Kathy Griffin), who definitely ruffle a few feathers but mostly keep the heat on themselves. And lastly: The smart, acerbic and assumedly mean-spirited (e.g. Chelsea Handler, Joan Rivers), who lampoon anybody and everybody they can and never apologize. In addition to stand-ups, there are funny actresses who appear on film/TV (the “Broad City” girls, Lena Dunham, Mindy Kaling, the SNL crew) and witty political gals like Samantha Bee and Jessica Williams, formerly of “The Daily Show.” There’s overlap between categories, but that’s generally where comedic styles reside.

Comedy is more dependent on personality than on jokes. Stand-up is basically just good storytelling; there are some quick quips, but mostly punchlines work because of bantery, casual build-up. The success of Louis CK’s yarns owe much to the man himself: We’ve all got something in common with a middle-aged redhead who struggles to eat healthy and please women. Louis speaks about stuff you’re not supposed to talk about, like how shitty and boring raising children can be. Woody Allen’s jokes about Freud, death and Jewishness wouldn’t quite work from the mouth of some non-Jewish, neurotic, bespeckled fellow.

Even Jim Gaffigan’s tales of scarfing junk food and hating photos of himself are amusing because of his sheepish delivery.

So success in comedy relies on audiences liking your disposition. Problem is, it’s notably tougher for female comedians to be thought “likable.” Louis CK notes the melancholy of his aging penis or his divorce

to riotous applause; but when Amy Schumer describes her sex life, she’s accused of only scaring up laughs by citing her vagina. Chris Rock has a strong personality (acerbic, certainly) but he’s admired for his willingness to diss people across racial and gender boundary lines, while someone like Chelsea Handler does the same thing and gets labeled a bitch. Indeed, strong-minded women are regularly “bitches” – but as mentioned in a Weekend Update SNL sketch starring Tiny Fey and Amy Poehler, “Bitches get stuff done.” Just look at Hillary Clinton. She won’t be winning any charm awards, but she just might win the presidency.

Female comedians (and Hillary) can seem intimidating and abrasive. Many have spoken about not wanting kids (Chelsea, Sarah, Ellen) and Americans prefer their women to be nurturers. “When you’re a woman and you’re forthright, people are like, ‘Oh, she’s a bitch,’” Handler said in an interview with the Daily Beast. “Well then, I’m a bitch, you know? But everybody is a bunch of different things. You can be a bitch and be wonderful.”

The way a funny person looks shouldn’t really matter.

How many people are both gorgeous AND fiendishly witty?

Still, there’s endless discourse about Amy Schumer’s round face, Joan Rivers’ plastic surgery or Sarah Silverman’s relative hotness (“for a comedian”). Mentions of Louis CK’s gut, Mitch Hedberg’s hippie hair or Aziz Ansari’s small head are few and far between. Age is another insult, as women comics over 40 are teased for still kicking, but dudes like George Carlin kept on trucking into their golden years. Joan Rivers was 83 when she died (and still gainfully employed) but half the time she was painted as some sequined, ghoulish harpy by the media. After participating in Comedy Central’s James Franco Roast, Sarah Silverman expressed surprise at how hard her age was hammered home by colleagues. “I wasn’t even the oldest person on the dais!” she laughed in an interview with Bill Maher, ever the good sport.

Comedy necessitates humility, and audiences like entertainers to talk about being wrong, broken or floundering, just as we enjoy hot messes getting drunk and screwing up their lives on reality TV. You might think it takes guts to get on stage, but most comedians wouldn’t describe themselves as confident – humor masks insecurity. Making people laugh is a defense mechanism. It’s surprisingly common for comedians to reveal tendencies toward depression, childhood trauma or desperation for other people’s approval. (People were surprised at how sad Robin Williams turned out to be).

When women are self-deprecating, though, it veers into “pathetic” territory. Remember Renée Zellweger as Bridget Jones? She liked to eat ice cream and longed for a boyfriend. But there’s a reason that character didn’t become a sex symbol. No one dresses up as Bridget for Halloween.

She was funny and clever but too much of a sad sack. If you’re a guy without his shit together, you’re a work in progress. If you’re a girl in the same boat, you’re cause for concern.

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[movies] Sausage Party

Florence Foster Jenkins

Playing at Stadium 9

Playing at the Gaslight

Rating: R

Rating:

Genre:

PG-13

Animation, comedy

Directed by: Stephen

Directed by: Conrad

Frears Written by: Nicholas

Vernon, Greg Tiernan

Martin Runtime:

Written

1 hr. 50 min.

by: Kyle Hunter, Ariel Shaffir, Seth Rogen, Evan Goldberg

Rotten Tomatoes Tomatometer:

92%

Runtime: 1 hr. 29 min.

Rotten Tomatoes Tomatometer: 90% Synopsis: A misplaced sausage

and his savory friends embark on an existential adventure through the aisles of a massive supermarket in this raunchy animated comedy. As the store’s annual Fourth of July sale draws near, the perishable pals must return to their rightful places on the shelves before the customers come flooding in to fill their carts.

Life, Animated Playing At Animas City Theatre Rating: PG Genre:

Documentary Directed by: Roger

Ross Williams Runtime: 1 hr. 29 in.

Rotten Tomatoes Tomatometer: 93% Synopsis: The inspirational story

of Owen Suskind, a young man who was unable to speak as a child until he and his family discovered a unique way to communicate by immersing themselves in the world of classic Disney animated films. This emotional comingof-age story follows Owen as he graduates to adulthood and takes his first steps toward independence.

Synopsis: In 1940s New York, Courtesy of Rotten Tomatoes

»» “Captain Fantastic” stars Viggo Mortensen as a father who is raisng his kids off the grid.

Off the grid with ‘Captain’

By Ann Hor naday © 2016, THE WASHINGTON POST

Ben and his wife, Leslie, have been rusticating in the dripping woods with six kids since the birth of their now-teenage son Bodevan.

With Leslie in the hospital, George now oversees a free-range brood of bright, curious, physically brave kids who are as comfortable with a boning knife as they are reading Middlemarch while wearing a gas mask.

That last touch is a nod to Ben’s mistrust of an outside world that, by his lights, is fatally commercialized, hypocritical and lazy.

Written and directed by Matt Ross – familiar to most viewers as an actor in such TV shows as “Silicon Valley” and “American Horror Story” – “Captain Fantastic” vividly captures Ben’s overpowering influence on his children, who can’t help but come under his implacably demanding spell: When one of his daughters describes Lolita as “interesting,” he lights into her, accusing her of using a “non-word” and insisting that she provide a more nuanced, sophisticated literary analysis.

Later, during the family’s annual celebration of Noam Chomsky Day, he gives his 6-year-old son a

Captain Fantastic Playing at Animas City Theatre Rating: R Genre: Drama

Florence Foster Jenkins (Meryl Streep), a New York heiress and socialite, obsessively pursued her dream of becoming a great singer. The voice she heard in her head was beautiful, but to everyone else it was hilariously awful.

Her “husband” and manager, St. Clair Bayfield (Hugh Grant), an aristocratic English actor, was determined to protect his beloved Florence from the truth. But when Florence decided to give a public concert at Carnegie Hall, St. Clair knew he faced his greatest challenge.

Directed by: Matt Ross Written by: Matt Ross Runtime: 1 hr. 59 min.

Rotten Tomatoes Tomatometer: 78%

copy of The Joy of Sex. It goes without saying that, for all his efforts to instill self-reliance and fearlessness into his kids, Ben can be a sanctimonious pain and – more dangerously – prone to overlook the risk his survivalist lessons entail.

That dualism lies at the heart of “Captain Fantastic,” wherein Bodevan and his brother Rellian begin to chafe against their father’s didacticism, and a family crisis sends the whole clan on an antic bus trip to New Mexico.

It’s during that journey – punctuated by visits to Ben’s sister and brother-in-law and a stay with his wife’s parents – that Ben and the children realize just how alienated they’ve become while living in Walden, and the rest of the world has gone Walmart.

Pete’s Dragon Playing at Stadium 9 (Also available in 3-D with surcharge) Rating: PG Genre: An-

imation, kids & family Directed by: David

Lowery Written by: David Lowery, Toby Hal-

brooks, Malcolm Marmorstein Runtime: 1 hr. 30 min.

Rotten Tomatoes Tomatometer: 84% Synopsis: A reimagining of Disney’s

family film, “Pete’s Dragon” is the adventure of an orphaned boy named Pete and his best friend Elliott, who just so happens to be a dragon.

16 | Thursday, August 11, 2016 • • •••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

[pages] Check this out “Before the Fall,” by Noah Hawley Review by Shelley Walchak It’s not very often that you find a perfect match between a character study and a suspense novel, but Noah Hawley has succeeded in accomplishing this in his new book “Before the Fall.” The novel centers on Scott Burroughs, an eccentric, wannabe artist. Burroughs attracts the attention of Maggie, a wealthy down-to-earth woman who offers him a ride on her family’s private plane out of Nantucket to New York, where he is hoping to sell some of his “disaster-scene” paintings. His fortune turns into catastrophe when the plane crashes into the ocean shortly after takeoff killing everyone on board except Scott and JJ, Maggie’s son.

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Scott survives a harrowing 10-hour swim to shore through shark-infested waters and humongous waves with a dislocated shoulder and little JJ on his back.

It’s too amazing to be true – and that’s exactly the problem. No one can understand how he could have could have survived and why the others on the plane, including some of the most influential businessmen in the country, did not.

Hawley leads the reader along a whodunit pathway devoting a chapter to analyzing each of the victims involved as well as a few extra, like an anchor of a Foxlike news station. The reader is pulled into a detective role trying to figure out the cause of the crash through the flashbacks of each of the characters. The outcome is surprising and somewhat of a fizzle, but getting there is an absorbing journey.

Shelley Walchak is director of the Pine River Library in Bayfield and author of “52 Rivers: A Woman’s Fly-Fishing Journey.”

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[ weed ] Seeing Through the Smoke Christopher Gallagher

Cheech and Chong: The original kings of (cannabis) comedy “I been smokin’ since I was born, man. I can smoke anything, man.”

T

his week’s edition of Canna-Bosses pays homage to the godfathers of weed culture in the media, two guys that every Snoop Dogg, Wiz Khalifa, Rihanna, Seth Rogan, James Franco, Doug Benson, Miley Cyrus, B-Real, Matthew McConaughey, Sarah Silverman, Woody Harrelson ... well, basically every celebrity weed icon not named Marley or Willie Nelson should bless every time they light up in public: Richard Anthony “Cheech” Marin and Thomas B. Kin Chong.

A couple things you might not have known about the ultimate marijuanistas, Cheech and Chong: »» Cheech Marin’s father was an LAPD officer. (Shines a whole new light on the whole “Nash Bridges” thing, huh?) »» Tommy Chong is Canadian. (He became a naturalized U.S. citizen in the late ’80s.) He’s also the father of actress Rae Dawn Chong, of “Commando” and “Quest for Fire” ... ummmm ... fame.

The duo met in the late ’60s in Vancouver, British Columbia, Canada, where Marin had gone to avoid being drafted during the Vietnam War; Chong was providing entertainment at his father’s burlesque club as a member of a small-time musical group with Marin as the emcee for shows. When that fell by the wayside, the duo moved on to improv comedy, starting to perform in 1971 as “Cheech and Chong,” a pairing that would last into the middle of the following decade.

Illustration by David Holub/DGO

The ’70s and ’80s were good to the comic masterminds as they starred in seven movies and made nine albums, including two that reached as high as No. 2 on the comedy charts and one, the 1973 “Los Cochinos,” for which they snagged a Grammy.

I remember the pair’s movies being in the general background of my childhood as I went from place to place with my nine aunts and uncles, but it was the studio voice-work that really hit me square in the funny bone as a newly-minted ninth-grade stoner coming and going from freshman basketball games listening to cassette tapes (remember those?) on my friend EJ’s boom box (remember those?) in the back of the school bus. We weren’t high while listening (EJ never even smoked until after high school), but we would laugh til we cried listening to those skits with Sergeant Stedenko,

Sister Mary Elephant and the infamous cheeba-tinted rehash of “Who’s On First?” entitled “Dave’s Not Here.”

By that time, winter 1986-87, the pair had broken up, with Marin jettisoning his stoner persona in favor of more conventional acting roles. Chong’s career saw him remaining true to form as a pothead in the majority of his acting gigs, including the role as loveable hippie, Leo Chingkwake, on “That ’70s Show” from 1999 to 2006.

It was during his tenure as a foil to those crazy Wisco kids that Chong found himself in serious hot water with the United States federal government as a target of a sting operation dealing with online vendors of drug paraphernalia, a saga, detailed wonderfully in the film “a/k/a Tommy Chong,” that culminated in his detention in federal prison for nine months during 2003 and 2004. Chong has since

raised the level of his cannabis activism, becoming an Advisory Board member of NORML (National Organization for the Reform of Marijuana Laws). He has also been vocal about his cannabis use during two cancer battles.

The past decade has seen a second flourishing of the iconic pair together as comic activists alongside dozens of stars they inspired with their most famous works. The word godfathers has rarely been so appropriately used.

Do yourself a solid this week – grab “Up in Smoke” or “Nice Dreams,” rip four or five bong hits, and laugh yourself silly with the kings of cannabis comedy.

Christopher Gallagher lives with his wife and their four dogs and two horses. Life is pretty darn good. Contact him at chrstphrgallagher@gmail.com

214017

18 | Thursday, August 11, 2016 • • •••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

[Netflix and chill — 420 edition] [SPONSORED REVIEW]

‘Ghost World’

Ghost Train Haze

It’s female comedy week here at DGO, and this is a very funny film about funny women (well, one funny woman in particular). “Ghost World” is based on an underground comic book of the same name by Daniel Clowes, who co-wrote the screenplay with director Terry Zwigoff.

Thora Birch (“American Beauty”) stars as Enid and Scarlett Johansson plays her best friend Rebecca; these two are sarcastic, mopey and more pissed off than Holden Caulfield.

They detest all the phonies in their town and high school, though luckily they’ve just graduated – albeit without any college or otherwise impending plans.

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lett Johansson).

One day, Enid and Rebecca decide to play a prank, the sort that seems flawlessly clever when you’re stoned but kind of mean once you’ve sobered up. After perusing the personal ad section in a local paper, they contact a guy searching for a blonde stranger he met at the airport (“Am I crazy, or did we have a moment?”) They string him along, pretending to be the blonde he seeks.

Rebecca is unaffected, content to mock and sully the life of an innocent bystander; but Enid ends up liking Seymour (Steve Buscemi), who is middle-aged, kindly and collects old records. His interests are as weird as hers. The girls grow apart while Enid and Seymour grow closer.

With cropped back hair and ironic punk outfits, Enid speaks for all misfits. She might not be a technical stoner, but she’s listless and jobless; hanging out at a faux-’50s diner, listening to records, watching old Bollywood films and cartooning in her spare time.

She’s a fervid anti-conformist, while Rebecca is a simpleton who suspects life might be easier if she tried go with the flow.

Enid’s interests are too specific, retro and unique. Guys her own age don’t like her (they like Rebecca – I mean, it’s Scar-

“Ghost World” holds a lesson about loneliness, and the kind of people who revel in it.

If you hate the whole world, what’s the point of living in it?

To girls like Enid and Rebecca, life seems inhospitable. Their casual cruelty to Seymour (and most others who cross their path) doesn’t make them feel good. Enid comes to realize that relating to someone is actually a lot more interesting.

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SILVERTON

[love and sex]

Savage Love | Dan Savage

Advice from Dan Savage ... but not THAT Dan Savage DEAR READERS: I’m on vacation for the next three weeks – but you won’t be reading old columns while I’m away. You’ll be getting a new column every week, all of them written by Dan Savage, none of them written by me.

Dan Savage is a sports writer and the assistant director of digital content for OrlandoMagic.com, and he will be answering your questions this week. Dan has covered six NBA finals and 10 NBA All-Star Games; he’s appeared on CBS, ESPN, NBA TV and First Take; and his writing has been published at ESPN.com, CBS. com, NBA.com, and OrlandoMagic.com. This is Dan’s first time giving sex-and-relationship advice.

“Other sports writers often tell me they enjoyed reading my latest column,” Dan Savage told me in an email, “but when they show me the article, it’s one of your sex-advice columns. The joke is going to be on them this time around when it’s actually my advice!”

I’m a straight guy in my 40s, and I’ve been with my wife for more than 20 years. I’m incredibly attracted to my wife. Recently, I’ve been a bit frustrated with us not having sex as frequently as I’d like. So I broached the subject with her. I tried to be easygoing about it, but maybe I [bleeped]ed that up. Basically, I told her that I fantasize about her daily and would like to have sex more often. I cited two examples of frustration. Two weeks ago, I came on to her and tried to initiate, but we had a dinner party to go to and she didn’t want to be late. One week ago, I was flirting with her but was rebuffed because we were going out to dinner and ... she wanted to go to dinner more than [bleep], I guess. I made my wife cry by bringing this up. End result is that she doesn’t want to [bleep] more than we already do, there’s nothing I can do to make sex more appealing for her and it hurt her for me to bring the subject up at all. I dropped it, apologized, and moved on. I don’t want to coerce her into anything (I want her to want me), so here we are. How can I communicate better in the future?

Using My Words Communication in any relationship is key. On the basketball court, one of the first things young players are taught is to communicate effectively with their teammates. They’re required to call out plays, offensive assignments and defensive rotations in order to prevent breakdowns and keep the system working smoothly.

In relationships, the same principles hold true. You

have to be able to effectively communicate with your partner in order to keep both parties happy. And just like everything else in life, timing is everything.

First, I’d make sure you communicate your needs at a time other than when you’ve just been rebuffed. You’re then likely to be less emotional, think more rationally and more effectively explain your needs without applying added pressure.

Second, I’d try making your next move when other plans are not on the table. In both the examples you mention, UMW, the timing of your request appears to have been an issue for her.

Schedule some time for an intimate dinner at home or cap off an exciting evening out on the town with romantic advances. If she does not respond to your improved efforts, then she’s not being a good teammate. A successful relationship is when both members’ needs are met, not just one.

I’m a 36-year-old bisexual female. I’ve been dating my nice Midwestern boyfriend for about four and a half years. Within the first few dates, I brought up nonmonogamy. I was pretty sure from past experiences that long-term monogamy wasn’t going to be for me. I get bored, I like attention, and I love the chase. He was against it. I thought, OK, we have a lot of other positive stuff going for us and maybe he would reconsider in the future. I feel like I’ve lost a part of my sexual self – no adventures, no three-ways, I miss girls, etc. I feel that what I want – newness, some kink he isn’t trained in, being with a girl, etc. – he can’t give me. So I brought up opening up the relationship again. My thought is I could get what I need/want and get my engine revving again, and hopefully bring that excitement and spark back to our relationship. He listens to your podcasts now, but he doesn’t think he could handle the idea of me with someone else. I don’t think I can handle the relationship as it is now, though, and this was my suggestion to try to make it stronger. I feel like I’ve already ended the relationship just by bringing this up. Are we doomed?

A Girl Has Needs I appreciate you having your boyfriend listen to my podcasts – oh wait, that was probably meant for the other Dan Savage. Never mind. My podcasts probably wouldn’t have helped with this issue.

Your question reminds me of a topic that’s currently top of mind in my profession: NBA free

agency. In the basketball world, it’s the time of year when teams can go after the best available prospects not under contract and offer them a deal to join their team. Organizations heavily vet these players, talking to their former teammates, coaches, and others to make sure that their values match up.

There’s nothing worse than being locked into a fiveyear guaranteed contract with a guy who doesn’t fit with your franchise. Actually, on second thought, there is – getting married to a guy who doesn’t share the same relationship goals and values.

If your boyfriend is someone who has no interest in open relationships – and from all indications, he’s doesn’t – odds are he’s never going to be happy in that type of situation. And if you’re never going to be happy with monogamy, then you need to find someone whose values match your own. Unfortunately, some people are destined to play man-to-(wo)man, while others are more satisfied in a 2-3 zone.

I’ve been hooking up with a good friend for about a year. We’re both single, and he lives in another state but comes to town for work every month or two, and we usually hang out and have really great sex when he’s here. One of the things I’ve always admired about him is his eco-conscious lifestyle ... which includes showering only about once a week to save water.

His BO is pretty inoffensive (it’s actually a nice scent), but I find that most times we hook up, I get a raging UTI within a day or two. It’s happened enough times that I’m wondering if his infrequent washing could be allowing bacteria to live on his junk, causing my infections. Is that possible? Do I need to have a talk with him about washing more frequently/thoroughly?

Hurts To Pee The simple answer is yes, HTP. It’s great to have an eco-conscious lifestyle, but not at the expense of your urinary tract. If he cares about you as much as he does about the environment, then with a quick chat, he’ll probably focus a little more on his personal hygiene. Especially if you explain to him that the overuse of antibiotics contributes to creating antibiotic-resistant bacteria, which can cause issues for the entire planet.

Follow Dan Savage, assistant director of digital content for OrlandoMagic.com, on Twitter @Dan_Savage.

20 | Thursday, August 11, 2016 • • •••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

[happening] Pop over to Studio &’s pop-up show Studio & is opening a pop-up show on Friday night with a little live music.

“And Let Sounds Contribute Toward Me: An Evening of Texture and Sound Inspired by the Poems of Walt Whitman” will kick off with a reception from 5 to 9 p.m. at the gallery, 1027 Main Ave. At the reception, check out live music from Minnesota soprano Janet Grove and her accompanist Teri Larson, also from Minnesota. They’ll perform twice during the evening, at 6 and 8.

The featured textile artists are: Anita Jain, Laurie Jacobi, Leena Mela Reiker, Chiaki O’Brien, Patty Sano Downs, Karen Gubitz, Mary Alice Hearn and Minna Jain. It’s curated by Common Strands International Fiber Art Exchange of Minneapolis, and highlights the work of artists and composers as well as Grove, all of whom have created pieces of art in response to Walt Whitman’s “Leaves of Grass.”

Along with the live music element, there will be pieces on display that are meant to be touched and handled. Additionally, Studio & will provide translations of their accompanying Walt Whitman poems in Braille, making this event accessible to people with low-vision and blindness.

While you’re there, you can also make your own piece of poetry and textile art under the direction of Common Strands’ artistic director and educator, Anita Jain.

Because it’s a pop-up show, the exhibit will close Sunday. Studio & is the first stop on an international tour for the show.

Thursday

Friday

Live Acoustic Lunchtime, 11:30 a.m., Smiley Cafe, 1309 East Third Ave.

The Assortment, 6-9 p.m., Foxfire Farms,

Ska-BQ with the Outskirts, 5 p.m., Ska

Opening Reception, “Work time: Indigo Textiles” by Rowland Ricketts, 5-7 p.m., Durango Arts Center, 802

Brewing Co., 225 Girard St., www.skabrewing. com.

Kirk James, 5:30-7:30 p.m., Kennebec Cafe,

4 County Road 124, Hesperus, 247-5674.

Ragtime Piano, 5:30 p.m., Diamond Belle

Saloon, 699 Main Ave., 375-7150.

Trivia, 6:30 p.m., Powerhouse Science Cen-

ter, 1333 Camino del Rio.

5513 County Road 321, Ignacio.

East Second Ave., http://durangoarts.org/ work-time.

Ragtime Piano, 5:30 p.m., Diamond Belle

Saloon, 699 Main Ave., 375-7150.

Jeff Salon Jazz Duo, 6-9 p.m., Macho’s, 1485 Florida Road, 422-8540.

Ethereal Fest Pre-Party, 9 p.m., Balcony Backstage, 600 Main Ave., Suite 205, https://www.facebook.com/ events/275572226146315.

802 East Second Ave., http://durangoarts.org/ event/featured-rental-raven-narratives.

Saturday

Durango Blues Train, 7-10:30 p.m., Durango & Silverton Narrow Gauge Railroad, 479 Main Ave., www.durangobluestrain.com.

Work time: Indigo Textiles by Rowland Ricketts, 10 a.m.-5 p.m., Durango Arts

The Durango Western Music and Vaudeville Show, 7 p.m., Henry Strater

Center, 802 East Second Ave., http://durangoarts.org/work-time.

Blossoms Galore Art Show - Veryl Nadya Rosenbaum, all day, The Farm

Bistro, 34 West Main Street, Cortez.

Theatre, 699 Main Ave., 375-7160.

Merely Players present “Collected Stories,” 6:30-9 p.m., Durango Public

Library, 1900 East Third Ave., www.merelyplayers.us.

Merely Players present “Collected Stories,” 6:30-9 p.m., Durango Public Library,

Henry Stoy, piano, 10 a.m.-1 p.m., Jean-

1900 East Third Ave., www.merelyplayers.us.

Theatre, 699 Main Ave., 375-7160.

Joanie Leeds Children’s Concert, 2 p.m., Durango Arts Center, 802 East Second Ave., http://durangoarts.tix.com/Event.aspx?EventCode=883387.

Durango Blues Train, 7-10:30 p.m., Du-

The Assortment, 5-9 p.m., Macho’s North,

rango & Silverton Narrow Gauge Railroad, 479 Main Ave., www.durangobluestrain.com.

1485 Florida Road.

Bistro, 34 West Main Street, Cortez.

Nina Sasaki & Dave Rust, 5-9 p.m., Ani-

nonprofit benefit, suggested donation $10, 19th Hole Concert Series at Pagosa Golf Club

mas River Cafe at the Doubletree Hotel.

Henry Stoy, piano, 10 a.m.-1 p.m., Jean-

Sundance Shorts Tour 2016, 7-9:30

p.m., Animas City Theater, 128 College Drive, https://somethingwildfilmfest.com.

Ragtime Piano, 5:30 p.m., Diamond Belle

Saloon, 699 Main Ave., 375-7150.

Karaoke with DJ Crazy Charlie, 9 p.m.,

Open mic, 7-11 p.m., Steaming Bean, locat-

Karaoke, 8 p.m., 8th Avenue Tavern, 509

Wild Horse Saloon, 601 East Second Ave., 3752568.

ed downstairs at the Irish Embassy Pub, 900 Main Ave., 403-1200, theirishembassypub. com.

East Eighth Ave., 259-8801.

The Black Velvet Trio, 5 p.m., Balcony Bar

Artist Talk: Rowland Ricketts, 5:30

& Grill, 600 Main Ave.

Karaoke, 9 p.m., 8th Avenue Tavern, 509

Movie and Popcorn: Pride, 7 p.m.,

p.m., Durango Arts Center, 802 East Second Ave., http://durangoarts.org/work-time.

Warsaw Poland Bros. 25th Anniversary Tour, also Busters Ghost & DJ I-Gene, 9 p.m., Animas City Theatre, 128 East

Unitarian Universalist Fellowship of Durango, 419 San Juan Drive, http://durangouu. org.

Jazz church (experienced musician drop-in session), 6 p.m., Derailed Pour

Jeff Salon Jazz Trio, 6-10 p.m., 7 Rivers Restaurant and Bar at Sky Ute Casino, 14324 Highway 172, Ignacio.

House, 725 Main Ave., 247-5440, www.derailedpourhouse.com.

Karaoke, 8 p.m., 8th Avenue Tavern, 509

College Drive.

East Eighth Ave., 259-8801.

Raven Narratives Live Storytelling Event, 7:30-10 p.m., Durango Arts Center,

The Durango Western Music and Vaudeville Show, 7 p.m., Henry Strater

Theatre, 699 Main Ave., 375-7160.

Ellis Miller for Old West Heritage Performances, 7 p.m., Cortez Cultural

Center, 25 North Market St., Cortez, www.cortezculturalcenter.org, 565-1151.

The Black Velvet Duo with Nina Sasaki & Larry Carver, 6:30-8:30 p.m.,

East Eighth Ave., 259-8801.

The Durango Western Music and Vaudeville Show, 7 p.m., Henry Strater

Pierre Bakery, 601 Main Ave., 385-0122.

Zolopht, 9 p.m., Balcony Backstage, 600 Main Ave., Suite 205, www.reverbnation.com/

zolopht.

Sunday Blossoms Galore Art Show - Veryl Nadya Rosenbaum, all day, The Farm

Pierre Bakery, 601 Main Ave., 385-0122.

Irish music jam session, 12:30 p.m.,

Irish Embassy Pub, 900 Main Ave., 403-1200, www.theirishembassypub.com.

The Durango Western Music and

Continued on Page 22

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Mancos Valley Summer Brewfest happening Saturday Head over to Mancos on Saturday for a day of live music, wine and, of course, beer at the second annual Mancos Valley Summer BrewFest. This year, gates will open at 10 a.m. at Cottonwood Park in Mancos.

Live music starts at 11 a.m., and includes performances by The Great Contention, The Lindells, Secondhand Strings, Afrobeatniks and Hello, Dollface.

Beer will be provided by Mancos Brewing Co. and Riff Raff Brewing from Pagosa Springs. Wine will be provided by Guy Drew Vineyards.

There’s also going to be an activity area for the kids, courtesy of Painted Turtle Studio.

Tickets are $15 in advance, $20 at the gate. There’s also new student pricing this year, with kids 13-18 getting in for 5 bucks. Kids 12 and younger are free. You can get your tickets in Mancos at Mancos Brewery, Zuma Natural Foods and LivWell; in Durango at Southwest Sound; in Cortez at Pie Maker Bakery and Kokopelli Bike & Board; and in Dolores at Dolores Food Market.

Proceeds from the brewfest will benefit Mancos Valley Resources, The Pay It Forward Fund and Mancos Food Share.

follow, like, tweet us... dgoma g /dgomag @dgo_mag

From Page 21

Wednesday

Vaudeville Show, 7 p.m., Henry Strater

Carute Roma / Project Merry Christmas, Community Concert in the Secret Gar-

Theatre, 699 Main Ave., 375-7160.

Karaoke, 8 p.m., 8th Avenue Tavern, 509

East Eighth Ave., 259-8801.

Four Corners Arts Forum, 9 a.m., KDUR

Bluegrass Jam, 6-9 p.m., Irish Embassy Pub, 900 Main Ave., 403-1200, theirishembassypub.com.

91.9/93.9 FM, www.kdur.org.

Geeks Who Drink trivia, 8:30 p.m., BREW

Blossoms Galore Art Show - Veryl Nadya Rosenbaum, all day, The Farm

Pub quiz, 6:30 p.m., Irish Embassy Pub, 900

Monday

We’ll have you smiling in no time!

Main Ave., 403-1200.

Happy Hour Yoga, 5:30-6:30 p.m., Ska

Pingpong and poker tournament, 8

Spoken Word, 7-9 p.m., Steaming Bean,

located downstairs at the Irish Embassy Pub, 900 Main Ave., 403-1200, theirishembassypub. com.

RECREATIONAL 9am-7:45pm • MEDICAL 9am-6:45pm • 72 SUTTLE ST. UNITS F & G 970.259.3674 • 7 DAYS A WEEK

durangoorganics.com

Tuesday Blossoms Galore Art Show - Veryl Nadya Rosenbaum, all day, The Farm

Bistro, 34 West Main Street, Cortez.

The Alternative Resource

Monday Night Blues Jam with Missy and the Bluetones, 7-10 p.m., Moe’s Star-

facebook.com/durangoorganics 237195

Pub & Kitchen, 117 W. College Drive, 259-5959.

Bistro, 34 West Main Street, Cortez.

Brewing Co., 225 Girard St., yoga and a pint of beer for $10, www.skabrewing.com.

GREAT STRAIN SELECTION • HASH & CONCENTRATE • EDIBLES • SEEDS • CLONES • PIPES SMOKING ACCESSORIES • APPAREL • MJ LITERATURE & CONSULTING • ATM ON SITE

den, 5-7 p.m., Rochester Hotel Secret Garden, 726 East Second Ave., www.swcommunityfoundation.org.

light Lounge, 937 Main Ave., 259-9018.

p.m., Moe’s, 937 Main Ave., 259-9018.

Karaoke with DJ Crazy Charlie, 9 p.m.,

Wild Horse Saloon, 601 East Second Ave., 3752568.

Submissions To submit listings for publication in DGO and dgomag.com, go to www.

swscene.com and click “Add Your Event,” fill out the form with all your event info and submit.

Listings at swscene.com will appear both at dgomag.com and in our weekly print edition.

Posting events at swscene.com is free and takes about one business day to process.

22 | Thursday, August 11, 2016 • • •••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

Horoscope ARIES (March 21 to April 19) For the next six weeks, you want to travel and explore! You also want to explore opportunities in publishing, the media, medicine, the law and higher education.

TAURUS (April 20 to May 20) Disputes about inheritances, debt and shared property might not be settled until October. Until then, be reasonable and patient because this will help you.

GEMINI (May 21 to June 20) While Mars is opposite your sign for the next six weeks, it’s easy to be impatient with others. (They seem to be so annoying!) After that, things return to normal.

CANCER (June 21 to July 22)

LEO (July 23 to Aug. 22) Competitive sports might be a strong focus for you in the next six weeks.

You intend to go after what you want in terms of social plans, vacations and romantic intentions.

VIRGO (Aug. 23 to Sept. 22) Be patient with chaos and increased activity at home, because by October, this insanity will be history. Just go forward one step at a time. Relax.

LIBRA (Sept. 23 to Oct. 22) Your communication skills are strong and forthright now, and they will stay that way until October. Use this to study, sell and write, but don’t overwhelm anyone.

SCORPIO (Oct. 23 to Nov. 21)

Your determination to boost your income is admirable. The trick is to reduce your spending. No matter how much you earn, if you spend more, you’re in debt.

SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22 to Dec. 21) You love the outdoors. Because Mars is in your sign until October, grab every chance you can to pursue physical sports and outdoor activities. You need this outlet!

CAPRICORN (Dec. 22 to Jan. 19) Secret love affairs, as well as behindthe-scenes activities, are your focus for the next six weeks. When in doubt, take the high road because secrets eventually come out.

AQUARIUS (Jan. 20 to Feb. 18) Competition with a friend or with a

group through physical sports will be strong in the next six weeks. This same energy makes you a group leader.

PISCES (Feb. 19 to March 20) Your ambition is aroused much more than usual until October. You can use this energy to accomplish something important. Be aware of this.

BORN THIS WEEK You have great communication skills.

You are confident and outgoing, and have strong humanitarian values. Initially, this year begins quietly, which is why you might not see major changes until next year; however, it will be a year of growth, construction and building. Do what you can to reduce your debt and strengthen your financial position, because you are building for your future! © 2016 King Features Syndicate Inc.

Bizarro

You’re keen to work hard on the job to show others what you can do. Be

careful you’re not too bossy; ultimately, this is anti-productive.

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FIND YOUR NEXT ADVENTURE SECRET HIDEOUTS · KILLER WEEKENDS · GEAR & HOW TOS

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