April 2, 2008

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union Officers hear presentation on Central Campus plans, PAGE 4

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THE CHRONICLE

PHOTO ILLUSTRATION BY KEVIN HWANG/THE CHRONICLE

In two videogames developed at Duke, users can help fight crack addiction (left) and practice teamwork in health care provision (right).

Role-playing the way to health Duke researchers tackle real-world problems with video games by

Jessica Lighter THE CHRONICLE

A new set of video games will attract audiences beyond just the couch potato.

Duke researchers are collaborating with private companies in using virtual-reality simulators to teach health care providers and help drug abusers overcome addiction.

“As opposed to most games where people run around and shoot things, the goals of the games we are creating are to save lives and teach people to save lives,” said Jerry Heneghan, Fuqua ’O2, founder and chief executive officer of Virtual He-

roes, Inc. —a company that creates virtual simulation systems.

Zachary Rosenthal, an as-

sistant clinical professor of psy-

chiatry and behavioral sciences, has devised a video game to help crack addicts combat addiction.

As part ofthe treatment, therapists guide patients through a virtual world filled with drug-related stimuli.

“The way we created the virtual world was we went with [a Durham Police Department] unit and took pictures of crack neighborhoods and neighborhoods related to crack use,” Rosenthal said. “[We then] used that imagery with software artists and tried to create

DSG fails to

notify students of new deadline by

Jessica Lighter THE CHRONICLE

Following snafus with election software last week, Duke Student Government faces more complaints this week regarding its handling of senate elections.

Applications to run were officially due Sunday at 9 p.m., but DSG Attorney General Paul Zarian, a sophomore, said he decided to extend the deadline to Monday at 9 p.m. after some students asked to submit late applications.

But after Zarian granted the extension, DSG failed to notify the student body of the extension.

“We wanted to make sure that everyone had the opportunity SEE DSG ON PAGE 6

a virtual world that looks a lot like Durham.”

Although patients initially experience high cravings in response to the virtual world, the cravings decline within a few minutes when no crack is smoked. Once the cravings subside, researchers play a series of unique sounds. Patients then learn to associate the sounds with the absence of the drug. .

The patients are then given cell phones that are connected to an automated server that calls them three times a day and plays the unique tone. They can also SEE VIDEO GAMES ON PAGE 5

Residence Life and Housing Services officials confirmed Tuesday that they will be able to accommodate on West Campus 39 freshman women of the 55 who were left without housing Sunday.

Officials said Monday that 19 freshman women would be assigned housing on Central Campus. That leaves 16 students who will be forced offWest.

Four freshman men are relocating at the request of RLHS to provide more bed space for females, and RLHS is still negotiating with two other men.

‘We’re continuing to work the situation,” said Eddie Hull, dean of residence life and executive director of housing services. “[But] we have a number of things in the air right now, and it’s a veryfluid situation.”

In order to create more bed space, RLHS will convert 16

room

selected male rooms to female living sections, Hull said Monday, noting that an unassigned triple room in a female section will provide three more beds.

RLHS sent an e-mail Tuesday to unhoused female freshmen explaining the new process of room assignment.

Pairs and blocks of women will be contacted in lottery number order with a list of availEddie Hull rooms, able and they will respond with their room preferences. The process is expected to take several days, officials said.

Students affected by the housing SEE ROOM FIX ON PAGE 6

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55 freshman women did not receive housing assignments Sunday.

RLHS managed to secure 39 extra bedspaces as of Tuesday, leaving 16 female students still without housing.

RLHS has asked six male students—three roommate pairs—to relocate. Two pairs have agreed to move, with one pair still negotiating.

As an incentive, RLHS is offering females who do not receive West Campus housing and males who are relocated the possibility*of rooms in the newly renovated Few Quadrangle in Spring 2009.

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THE CHRONICLE

2 I WEDNESDAY, APRIL 2,2008

U.S.NEWS Oil companies: Prices not our fault WASHINGTON Don't blame us, oil industry chiefs told a skeptical Congress. Top executives of the country's five biggest oil companies said Tuesday they know record fuel prices are hurting people, but they argued it's not their fault and their huge profits are in line with other industries.

Appearing before a House committee, the executives were pressed to explain why they should continue to get billions of dollars in tax breaks when they made $123 billion last year and motorists are paying record gasoline prices at the pump.

Cities see fewer high school grads WASHINGTON Seventeen of the nation's 50 largest cities had high school graduation rates lower than 50 percent, with the lowest graduation rates reported in Detroit, Indianapolis and Cleveland, according to an America's Promise Alliance report released Tuesday.

The report found that about half of the students served by public school systems in the nation's largest cities receive diplomas.

SCIENCE/TECH WORLD NEWS Ukraine and Georgia to join NATO CPR as effective as defibrillators BUCHAREST, Romania Unflinching from a fight, President George W. Bush said Tuesday he fully supports proposals to put ex-Soviet states Ukraine and Georgia on the road toward joining NATO despite French and German qualms it would upset relations with Moscow.

Bush's declaration laid the groundwork for an uncomfortable showdown when leaders of the 26-member military alliance gather in Bucharest for a summit Wednesday to Friday. France refused to back down under U.S. pressure.

CHICAGO Having a defibrillator at home can help a heart attack survivor live through a second crisis, but so can CPR and at a much lower cost. That's the bottom line from the first test of using these heart-shocking devices in the home.

The devices worked. But so few people in the study were stricken at home, and CPR by spouses in the comparison group was so good, that the 7,000-person study wound up being be too small to prove that a defibrillator can improve survival.

Dems unsure how to end Iraq war

ENTERTAINMENT

WASHINGTON Democratic leaders returned from their spring break this week to declare that Iraq is in turmoiland that they will continue to try to force President George W. Bush to end the war. But facing another uphill battle, party members are undecided on whether to try to cut off money or take a softer approach that is more likely to succeed.

They will have to decide soon. Congress has approved only $86.7 billion ofthe Bush administration's $196.4-billion request for war spending began Oct. 1.

live togetherin Iraq historic change in policy, scores of husband-andve and sleep together in te—a move aimed at preiages, boosting morale mg re-enlistment rates at ten the military is strugill its ranks five years into ting. makes a lot of things easiid Staff Sgt Marvin Frazier, lly adds a lot of stress, beseparated. Now you can sit o-face and try to work out and comfort each other."

Ebert to continue writing reviews CHICAGO Roger Ebert will resume writing reviews later this month, but wilt not rejoin his syndicated TV show because he's still unable to speak.

In a letter published in Tuesday's Chicago Sun-Times, the Pulitzer Prize-winning film critic and co-host ofTV's "Ebert & Roeper"said surgery in January ended in complications,and his ability to speak was not restored. He said the return of speech would require another surgery.

ODDSAND ENDS 3rd gradersplan to attack teacher WAYCROSS, Ga. A group of third-graders plotted to attack their teacher, bringing a broken steak knife, handcuffs, duct tape and other items for the job and assigning children tasks including covering the windows and cleaning up afterward, police said Tuesday.

The plot by as many as nine boys and girls at Center Elementary School in south Georgia was a serious threat, Waycross Police ChiefTony Tanner said.

The children,ages Sand 9, were apparently mad at the teacher because she had scolded one of them for standing on a chair, Tanner said. A prosecutor said they are too young to be charged with a crime under Georgia law.

but rainy Friday. Have a wonderfulWednesday!

Calendar

Today Duke Royale DorisDuke Center, Sarah P. Duke Mingle with classmates and faculty beer, wine and hors d'oeuvreswb in a sleek and classy atmosphei Fresh and Sweet Main West Quad, 11:30 a.m.

Celebrate Farmworker Awaren> tgk fresh, pesticide-free produce grower Lyon Farms and organic chocolate bars. Points/FLEX/cash/check accepted.

DeItAIDS Movie Screening McClendon 2,8:30 p.m.

A student-run philanthropic organization dedicated to the fight against AIDS will screen an AIDS-related movie for anti-AIDS week.

News briefs compiled from wire reports

"In the book of life, the answers aren't in the back."

Charlie Brown

WEDNESDAY, APRIL 2,2008 | 3

THE CHRONICLE

DPD: No truth to

2 indicted in Carson case

...

Monday

gang rumor by

An Orange County grand jury indicted Demario Atwater and Laurence Lovette Monday on charges of first-degree murder in the March 5 killing of Eve Carson, a senior and student body president at the University of North Carolina at Chapel Hill.

Atwater will return to court May 1 to discuss his violations further. A hearing in May will determine if the state will pursue the death penalty against him.

Lovette, at 17 years old, is too young to face the death penalty.

Earlier Monday, Atwater attended a 10-minute procedural hearing for violating his probation on the same charges that brought him to court March 3, two days before Carson’s murder.

That hearing was postponed because of a scheduling error, and the N.C. Department of Correction has launched an investigation into the handling of Atwater’s probation. It will release its

Ally Helmers THE CHRONICLE

Although many students received listserv e-mails Monday evening warning of a dangerous initiation practice by the gang Mara Salvatrucha, Durham Police Department officials said the emails are unsubstantiated.

The e-mails state that members of the gang, also known as MS-13, rear-end cars and then shoot drivers who get out to inspect the damage.

Representatives from DPD said police phone lines across the state have received calls from concerned residents about the message and added that the e-mails have made their way across the country.

For now, DPD is dismissing the warning—which began to spread via text messaging and e-mail March 26—as an urban legend, said Capt. Ron Evans, operations bureau executive officer.

“There’s nothing to it,” he said. “We don’t act upon urban legends and false rumors.”

Sophomore Danielle Carver was one of the students who received a cautionary e-mail from the Kappa Alpha Theta sorority’s listserv.

“I have a car here and definitely drive around a lot at night; I’m not SEE MS-13 GANG ON PAGE 4

SARA GUERRERO/THE CHRONICLE

Apple Vice President JohnBrandon speaks to the Economics Student Union and others Tuesday afternoon.

Apple VP narrates his path to career success by

Anne Llewellyn THE CHRONICLE

A school that claims the Bill and Melinda Gates Foundation as one of its biggest benefactors might be considered hostile territory to the folks at Apple, but one of Steve Jobs’ top dogs came anyway to share his career experiences and offer advice.

John Brandon, Apple’s vice president of the Americas and Asia Pacific, spoke to a crowd of approximately 75 undergraduates Tuesday afternoon in the La Barre Auditorium in the Social Sciences

Building. The Economics Student Union hosted the event.

After an April Fool’s prank suggesting one lucky audience member would find an iPod touch taped to the bottom of his or her chair, Brandon began by briefly narrating how he went from being a European history student hoping to attend graduate school to working for a tomato paste factory and through several sales and management positions until finally achieving a high position in one of America’s most

findings early today.

Atwater was placed on probation in 2005 on charges of breaking and entering. Lovette was put on probation for the same charge January 16, two days before the murder of Duke graduate student Abhijit Mahato, for which Lovette was indicted by a grand jury March 17.

—from staff reports

SEE APPLE VP ON PAGE 5

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The African Presence and Persistence in Mexico: Memory and Modernity

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Padre Glyn Jemmott April 4, 2008 4:oopm

Fried! Building Room 225 East Campus (Formerly Old Art Museum) Padre Glyn Jemmott Nelson is a native of Trinidad and Tobago and has worked in the Costa Chica region of Southwestern Mexico for nearly a quarter of a century helping his parishioners recover their African memory and identity. In 1997, he was involved in launching the First Meeting of Afrodescendant Communities (Encuentro de Pueblos Negros) of the coastal region of Guerrero and Oaxaca, Mexico, and in recognizing March as Mexico's Black History Month, Padre Glyn has worked with other regional residents, to open and maintain a library and a secondary school.

He is also a founding member of the grassroots organization Mexico Negro A.C. For more information, contact Talia Weltman twlO@duke.edu

PRING NING-PLAY RANK KIND T E D

STORER IS FACULTY

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www.tickets.duke.edu

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‘it us pm citizens

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THE CHRONICLE

DUKE UNIVERSITY UNION

Nowicki presents Central plans by

Tina Mao

THE CHRONICLE

Where can Duke students go at 11:30 p.m. on a Tuesday if they need a break from studying?

Dean of Undergraduate Education Steve Nowicki posed this scenario to members of the Duke University Union at their weekly administrative meeting Tuesday night.

He said he hoped to see the creation of a DUU taskforce to convey student input for upcoming Central Campus plans—changes to the campus that will integrate rather than separate.

“I want the Union to think about how to design aspects of these spaces, especially as they relate to social entertainment spaces and street life,” Nowicki said.

In addition to presenting the current layout of Duke’s campuses—the two isolated islands of West and East campuses—he showed tentative plans for the development and expansion of residential, academic and student spaces along Campus Drive.

The plans, which were approved by the Board of Trustees March 1, shift the location of Central down Anderson Street toward Campus Drive and stretch residential housing out from Edens Quadrangle toward the Sarah P. Duke Gardens and the Nasher Museum ofArt. The proposal highlighted a continuous band of residential and student life down Campus Drive and included five different regions. Ideally, this strip of activity would promote what he called a “street scene” at Duke, Nowicki said.

“We’re alluding to creating life outside of residences that is animated... not justby special

MS-13 GANG from page 3 usually concerned,” she said. “I’ve heard rumors that the gang is targeting Duke and [University of North Carolina at Chapel Hill] students, so students with stickers on the back of their cars should be careful.”

Word of the e-mail also spread to students like freshman John Chang who did not directly receive it.

Although many students felt uneasy after reading the message, they did not necessarily take precautions, he said.

“I heard about [the message] from a friend of a friend,” he said. “I have friends who have cars here, but it was no major concern.”

KEVIN HWANG/THE CHRONICLE

Dean of Undergraduate Education Steve Nowicki makes a presentation about Central Campus plans to DUU Tuesday. events, but also by predictable, common every-

day things to do thatyou would find in interesting places to live,” Nowicki said. He mentioned a pub, a theater, eateries and the creation of a visitor’s center as possible options.

He stressed that the proposals are still highly flexible and that he felt the Union, given its status as a programming body, would be particularly helpful in creating social areas for students. He also expressed a desire to keep seniors on campus so they could continue to interact with other undergraduates.

President Chamindra Goonewardene, who officially succeeded senior Katelyn Donnelly Friday, said he was pleased Nowicki sought DUU’s input and hoped the Union could become a conduit for student opinion, “It’s good that we’re thinking five to 10 years ahead, and I’m glad [Nowicki] is consuiting us because I think students should really have some say,” said Goonewardene, a junior. “The fact that these discussions could be student-driven is a neat idea.”

Representatives from the Duke University Police Department said they received a call from DPD claiming the warning is false.

According to a related U.S. News and World Report article printed in December 2004, the presence of the MS-13 gang in Durham County has been steadily increasing alongside its Hispanic population.

Evans said, however, the urban legend has been circulating nationwide and is not the first of its kind.

“About six or eight months ago, people were told not to go to Walmart [in Durham] because of gang initiations,” he said. “People were also warned not to flash their headlights when meeting a car at night that wasn’t using its own.”

As of this time, Durham police said they are unaware of who initiated the rumor or where it originated.

“Even though this is not true, one should always maintain caution,” Evans said. “If they are bumped and they feel unsafe in stopping, it is my advice to go to a safe area and call the police.”

Available Courses in

African and African American Studies jM

Fall 2008

\

AAAS 495.01: After Slavery: The Problem of Freedom MW: 10:05-11:20 AM

Instructor: Thavolia Glymph

AAAS 495.02: Africans in the Americas W 4:25-5:40 PM

Instructor: Bayo Holsey

AAAS 106A.0I: Introduction to African and African American Studies WF 8:30-9:45AM

Instructor: Michaeline Crichlow

AAAS 122.08: Culture and Politics In Africa TUTH 11:40AM-12:55 PM

Instructor; Bayo Holsey

AAAS 192H.07: The African Diaspora TUTH: 2:50-4:05 PM

Instructor: Bayo Holsey

AAAS 199.03; Special Topics: “Youth in Africa in the 21st Century” TUTH: 10:05-11:20 AM Instructor; Stephen Smith AAAS 1995.01: Special Topics: “Plggin Out TUTH: 2:50-4:05 PM

-

The Cultural Politics of Food” Instructor; Michaeline Crichlow

AAAS 1995.02: Special Topics: “Black Independent Film 1970-2005” MW: 11:40 AM-12:55 PM

Instructor:

Jennifer Brody

AAAS 1995.04; Special Topics: “Black Love” W 4:25-5:40 PM Instructor: Chanequa Walker-Barnes

AAAS 299.15; Special Topics: “Demography and Democracy in Africa” TUTH

:

1:15-2:30 PM

AAAS 2995.01; Special Topics: “Beyond Slavery Freedom in the Americas” W: 6:15-8:30 PM

Instructor: Stephen Smith -

The Problem of Instructor: Thavolia Glymph

AAAS 2995.04; Special Topics: “African American Novel and the Law” W 6:00-8:30 PM

Instructor: Karla Holloway

s**s:

90% of Chronicle readers DO NOT subscribe to either the News & Observer or Herald-Sun. Source; Newton Marketing

&

Research, 2005

THE CHRONICLE

VIDEO GAMES from page 1 request to hear this tone whenever they desire. Therefore, when,the patients experience high cravings, they can listen to this sound and their cravings will go back down.

Virtual simulators can also serve educational purposes.

Faculty at the Duke University Medical Center, working in conjunction with Virtual Heroes, designed SDiTeams—an interactive virtual trainer that helps users optimize teamwork and communication in the medical setting.

“If you went through any hospital and suffered any injury, there is up to a 70-percent chance it had to do with [failures in] teamworkand communication,” said Dr. Jeffrey Taekman, an assistant professor of anesthesiology and director of human simulation and patient safety.

SDiTeams is based on a health care team coordination curriculum called TeamSTEPPS, which was created by the Defense Department and the Agency for Healthcare Research and Quality.

Users are able to participate in a shared virtual medical environment, and they receive extensive feedback after each session. It also employs three-dimensional graphics in realistic settings, such as battlefields in Iraq and the emergency room at Duke University Hospital.

In addition, the program permits instructors to constantly alter a virtual patient’s vital signs during the simulation. The program was revealed at an American Society of Anesthesiologists conference, and is used to train anesthesiologists, residents, nurses and medical school students.

“When I was using the program I was an observer,” said Chief Anesthesiology Resident Tameta Clark. “[SDiTeams] helped me learn how to manage younger residents, which is ultimately what we want to do when we get out of resi-

dency.”

Heneghan is also working with Tim Lenoir, Kimberly J. Jenkins chair in new technologies and society and director

of graduate studies in information science and information studies, on a project called “Virtual Conflict Resolution: Turning Swords to Ploughshares,” to produce a video game geared toward international relations and public policy students. Emphasizing leadership, cultural awareness and problem solving, the game will focus on training students to properly direct humanitarian aid during natural disasters.

APPLE VP from page 3 successful companies.

“It’s been a wild ride,” he said. “And it usually won’t be a straight line in your own careers. It’s a series of choices and opportunities, and it’s up to you to make the most of them.”

Although many in the audience were economics majors considering futures in the corporate world, others—like freshman Amy Zhang, who is considering a career in medicine—found Brandon’s advice applicable to other careers.

“I thought it was a really unique opportunity,” she said.

“And I liked hearing that his route wasn’t as straightforward as you might have thought.”

Brandon also provided a list of the top 10 tips for students preparing for their first post-graduation jobs. The first five were practical maxims for making the most of the experience.

In Brandon’s second point, he advised students to avoid start-up companies when seeking their first jobs in favor ofestablished corporations, in order to learn the essential skills from the best.

“Capture the good DNA as quickly as you can,” he said The last five concerned more private matters, such as personal ethics and balancing work and family. With his wife and his youngest daughter Jenni Brandon—a Duke freshman—in attendance, Brandon cautioned students, particularly those considering a future in investment banking, against neglecting families for time spent on the job.

“Tve seen so many people exchange their marriage for market share,” he said. “And if you’re thinking about investment banking, you have to know the banks are going to own you. So you need to go in with eyes wide open.”

Brandon advised students to maintain a high standard ofbusiness ethics and stressed honesty and cooperation.

“Look out for each other—sharing information is a good thing,” he said. “Don’t become one of those people who sees colleagues as the competition. They end up becoming a cancer in the organization.”

Freshman Ben Klitus said he enjoyed Brandon’s presentation and, as someone considering a future in business, likes hearing other people reflect on their career paths.

“It was also refreshing to hear someone talk about business ethics and issues that often aren’t really addressed,” he said.

WEDNESDAY, APRIL 2,2008 | 5

THE CHRONICLE

6 I WEDNESDAY, APRIL 2,2008

DSG from page 1 get election packets in,” said junior Jordan Giordano, DSG’s executive vice president and president-elect. “Especially with the elections pushed back a day, it gave people more time.”

Zarian said students were supposed to have been informed about the extension via a blast e-mail, but no message was sent.

“From what 1 heard from Sunny [Kantha, vice president for athletics and campus services], there was supposed to be a blast e-mail, but that obviously didn’t happen,” Zarian said. “Still though I don’t think it was a big deal to get [the application] in on Sunday since this has been on the DSG Web site for the past one and a halfmonths.”

Neither Zarian nor Giordano would say who had failed to send the blast e-mail.

Some members of the executive board said a lack of transparency may have unfairly advantaged those with connections to DSG. “[Some argue that] if someone wants to get involved in DSG, they are going to have to put effort into applying,” said freshman Mike Lefevre, a senator and next year’s vice president for athletics and campus services. “But I don’t really believe that We should spend money advertising the electionand we should encourage people to vote.... I don’t think they spend a single dollar on having people apply and gettingpeople to vote.”

Kantha, a junior and the executive vice president-elect, confirmed that the application was posted on the Web site, but noted that the deadline extension was not.

Since the extension was not well publicized, to

Senator Andrew Brown, a freshman, said he informed students on the Project Child and Project BUILD listservs as well as associated members of his fraternity of the change and encouraged them to apply. Brown is an associated member of the fraternity and has participated in projects Child BUILD. Freshman Patrick Rutter said he only heard of the extension through members or associated members of the fraternity.

“It helps knowing people who are involved rather than trying to figure this out on your own,” he said. “[The extension] wasn’t on the Web site or anything.

Sunny and Lefevre had to tell me.”

Kantha said he approves of people encouraging their friends to run for DSG but said he was upset that no e-mail was sent.

“Anyone can tell any of their friends to run for anything —that’s freedom of speech,” Kantha said. “We encourage people to get involved in DSG. My only concern is that there wasn’t a blast e-mail sent. It gives a little bit of an advantage to people who receive a [personal] e-mail.”

He said DSG should postpone the deadline for senator applications after sending out a blast e-mail to give students an equal opportunity to apply to run.

DSG President Paul Slattery, a senior, said it is difficult to take a completely unbiased approach to recruiting candidates.

“If the objective is to always and at all times have a 100-percent neutral advertising strategy, it’s unlikely that anyone will find out about anything,” he said. “The difficulty with any sort of initiative or in fact election is finding enough motivated and interested people to participate.”

ROOM FIX from page 1 situation said they were frustrated because they thought RLHS should have anticipated the shortage of rooms on West and acted on it earlier.

“I just feel like they don’t know what they are doing,” said freshman Nina Rodriguez, who is currently without a room assignment.

Rodriguez said she is unwilling to live on Central, and RLHS told her mother Sunday that sophomores would not be relocated to Central from West.

The decision to allow rising sophomores to live on Central was not made until the following day, Hull explained.

RLHS officials noted that rising sophomores will not be forced to live on Central.

Jesus loves Lauren Jones

SPECIAL TO THE CHRONICLE

A screenshotfrom the OfficeofStudent ActivitiesandFadlities'West CampusPlaza webcamshows a figurinein reality only several inches tall—ofJesus advertising Duke University Improv.And eternal salvation.

Although University policy states that all undergradustudents are required to live on campus for three years, Hull said the policy depends on the availability of space

ate

“I just feel like they don’tknow what they are doing.”

Nina Rodriguez,

freshman

and can change when something extraordinary happens, like the renovation of Few Quadrangle.

E-mails asking the male students to relocate offered the possible incentive of being able to live in the newly renovat-

ed Few Quad in Spring 2009. The same offer is guaranteed to any female sophomores living on Central, Hull said.

“I guess this is their idea of trying to make up for [making us move],” said freshman Pat Lang, one of the male students asked to surrender his assignment on West. “It’s just a feeling of powerlessness [because] there’s nothing we can do. We have to abide by it, no matter how unfair it seems.”

Lang said RLHS forced him and his roommate to choose between selecting another room on West, living on Central and entering a summer re-assignment process. He noted that he and his roommate decided to relocate to a room in Crowell Quadrangle.

Freshman Paul Tran, another student who was asked to relocate, said he and his roommate are opting to live on Central, though they are not happy about being separated from their block.

THE CHRONICLE

WEDNESDAY, APRIL 2,2008 I 7

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april 2,2008

CREW AND CRIMSON

..

Marquette head coach Tom Crean took the same position at Indiana Tuesday. He assumes the job from Kelvin Sampson, who resigned in February.

m

MEN'S BASKETBALL

Thomas, Henderson have healthy surgeries Sophomores Gerald Henderson and Lance Thomas underwent successful hand surgeries Tuesday at the Duke Ambulatory Surgery Center for injuries sustained over the course of Duke’s season.

Henderson went under the knife a reconstructive procedure that repaired a tom ligament in his right wrist The 6-foot-4 forward initially injured his shooting hand Feb. 6 against North Carolina and played with a brace for the rest of the season.

He hyperextended it March 15 in the ACC Tournament against Gerald Clemson while going Henderson up for a rebound late in the second half. Xrays performed on site at Bobcats Arena were Henderson, who av-

eraged 12.7 points per game, is expected to be

OPINION

Its great to be

..

a, Davidson Wildcat There’s been a lot of discussion about the future of Duke Basketball since the team’s loss to West Virginia March 22.

To make matters worse for everyone, it appears as if the dreaded foe down the road is about to power its way to its second national championship in the last four years, forcing hideous, Carolina-blue, argyle bookends on my four years in the Triangle area.

So what’s a spoiled, entitled, whiny Duke fan supposed to do?

Well, I’ve got an interesting solution to those of my ilk.

Take a brief vacation.

Transfer to Davidson.

Think about it for a second. In VCllSiTlon times of political turmoil, people threaten to move to our less-populated neighbor, Canada. Well this year, in times of socalled basketball turmoil, Davidson is the new Canada.

Here’s what I’ve managed to figure out about Davidson and why it seems to be a good place for us Duke refugees, even if I only have five more weeks of college eligibility: 1. Now that Taylor King has decided to depart Duke, there is no longer a Blue Devil whose basketball game I can relate to—that is, there’s no longer someone who

sidelined for three to four months.

Thomas needed surgery to reconstruct a Lance tom tendon on his right Thomas pinkie finger.

The 6-foot-8 forward averaged 4.3 points and 3.3 rebounds per game for Duke. He is expected to be out for eight to 10 weeks.

Dr. David Ruch performed both surgeries.

Duke lost in the second round of the NCAA Tournament March 22. The Blue Devils finished the season 28-6.

—from staff reports

•

ZACHARY

TRACER/CHRONICLEFILE

PHOTO

Sophomore shooting guard Stephen Curry led Davidson to an appearance in the NCAA Tournament regional final, where theWildcats lost, 59-57, to Kansas Sunday.

SEE VAISMAN ON PAGE 10

KEVIN HWANG/CHRONICLE FILE PHOTO

Sophomores Gerald Henderson and Lance Thomas underwent successful hand surgeries Tuesday.

THE CHRONICLE

10 1 WEDNESDAY, APRIL 2,2008

VAISMANfrom page 9 shoots indiscriminately from any part of the court, Enter Stephen Curry, the only non-Ivy League basketball player lankier than me.

Even though Davidson was eliminated in the Midwest Regional final Sunday, Curry said he will stick around for at least another year, meaning that there is a strong possibility that Davidson will make another run in the Big Dance.

The skinny guy is the new No. 1 in my heart.

2. Davidson’s best-known perk: The school does students’ laundry for free.

Had I known about this earlier, I probably would have applied there my senior year of high school instead of trying to transfer there my senior year of college.

I can safely say that I currently live closer to a washer and dryer than I ever will (approximately 7.5 inches outside my bedroom door), but it takes me an average of two and a half days to get through one complete wash-and-dry cycle.

And that’s before I even get to the whites.

The prospect of having clean T-shirts and jeans that aren’t baked in Krzyzewskiville mud is breathtakingly awesome.

3. Students can see their school’s basketball team play in the Tournament’s regional semifinal and final...

4. ...in person! For free!

Forget about the Iron Dukes and their waitlist—you can’t top a free weekend in Detroit, paid in full for students by the college. If this deal of free transportation, lodging and tickets is in effect next year, hopefully some wealthier alumni can bribe the selection committee to send the Wildcats to a San Diego regional.

5. Davidson is still in North Carolina

This may sound like a basic and meaningless observation, but when you are addicted to Bojangles and Cook Out, it is not.

Continuing to go to school in a place that will provide me with access to threepiece dark-chicken dinners and spicychicken sandwich trays is imperative, and Davidson has both restaurants within a 10minute drive ofcampus. Ode to joy.

Also, I wouldn’t have to move my stuff very far.

6. My sources tell me that students who are not varsity athletes are known as “Non-ers” because, apparently, everyone at Davidson is an athlete. For those that find the term “GDI” to be blasphemous, consider this new label a welcome gift.

7. Davidson is 15 miles from the Lowe’s Motor Speedway.

8. Sort-of Duke alumnus: Richard Nixon. Sort-of Davidson alumnus: Woodrow Wilson. Watergate. Fourteen Points.

9. Davidson has three a cappella groups on campus. This means that there is one a cappella group per 566 students, lower than Duke’s average of one group per 800 students. I’m not sure why this is significant, but because I heard an a cappella statstic on every admissions tour I took, I thought I’d throw that number out there.

10. I’d still get to hate the University of North Carolina. This cannot be underestimated.

Because Davidson has an enrollment of just 1,700, there is only room for about a quarter of us there. The bus ride down will have to be selective.

While you make up your mind, please excuse me for a second.

I have to go take my clothes out of the dryer. They have been there since Duke’s season ended.

ZACHARY TRACER/CHRONICLE FILE PHOTO

Tenth-seeded Davidson advanced to the Elite Eight but lost to theBlue Devils, 79-73, Dec. 1 in Charlotte.

Department of Duke IMvcfsiiy Stored®

LOOKING FOR A NEW CAREER? There is a demand for

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For elementary licensure, contact Dr. Jan Riggsbee at 660-3077 or jrigg@duke.edu. For high school licensure, contact Dr. Susan Wynn at 660-2403 or swynn@duke.edu

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Applicant must be self-motivated, detail-oriented, and have excellent organizational and communication skills. He/she will be involved in development of overall recruiting strategies, will work closely with interventionists to see that study aims are met, and will be accountable for day-to-day administration of the study. Qualifications: B. A. or B. S. in Psychology, Pre-Med major, or related field. Previous research experience and knowledge of Access and Excel preferred. This position offers a great opportunity for gaining work experience before graduate or medical school. To apply, please email resume and cover letter to Mrs. Julie Johnson at julie.johnson@ duke.edu. 919-684-5487

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SUMMER INTERNS AT THE COAST The NC Coastal Federation has policy and education internships available for Duke students & enrollees. Earn $4,500 for 11 weeks while protecting the environment. jims@ nccoast.org or 252-393-8185

with interest in young children, and enthusiasm for science learning to lead parties for young children. HS graduate with background in education and/or science is preferred. Up to 10 hours per week, primarily on weekends. Position starts at $8.25/ hour. Send resume to leslie.fann@ ncmls.org

NEWSPAPER DELIVERY This Month At Duke is hiring a delivery person to distribute newspapers both on and off-campus. You must be available to work on the last Friday and Saturday of each month to deliver papers, putting them in racks and removing old copies. Another day mid-month will be spent replenishing the racks. Pay is generous.

Minimum amount of lifting required.

Must have car/ truck and must be reliable. To apply, please email a letter of interest, your resume and two references to camille.jackson@ duke.edu.

SUMMER RESEARCH EXPERIENCE Are you a student desiring SUMMER RESEARCH EXPERIENCE? Busy cognitive psychology lab looking for 2 responsible, interested undergraduates.

One position will consist predominantly coding memories recalled by participants. Great for someone thatloves to read! The second position will include tasks such as: coordinating and conducting behavioral experiments (from participant recruitment to data entry). Flexible schedule plus a fun working environment for 8-15 hours per week @ $B.OO/ hour, (work-study preferred).

Email memiab@psych.duke.edu or call Amanda at 660-5639 today.

FULL TIME PSYCHOLOGY LAB MGR Full-time Psychology Lab Manager Position Motivated individual needed for full-time Lab Manager position in memory research lab in psychology department at Duke University. The Rubin Lab conducts behavioral, functional neuroimaging, and physiological investigations of autobiographical memory in young and healthy older adults, and in patients with posttraumatic stress disorder. Duties include scheduling and testing human subjects, preparation of experimental materials, data imput and analysis, supervising undergraduate research assistants, and general lab management tasks. Successful applicants must work well independently. Prior research experience in psychology is encouraged but not necessary. Fluency with computers required. An excellent opportunity to gain research experience necessary for admission to grad school!

To apply, please email the following items to Amanda Miles at memlab@psych.duke.edu: cover letter including statement explaining interest in the position, expectations, long-term goals, and any unique skills or characteristics you feel would contribute to the lab; resume or CV; transcipt of undergraduate coursework; and contact information (email and phone number) for at least 3 references.

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Attend the events to get information and giveaways.

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B o^

2-

THE CHRONICLE

12 I WEDNESDAY, APRIL 2,2008

forcing opposing defenses into vulnerable positions. He then exploits them with one of his many options from his complex playbook.

“You never know when he’s going to run it, to pass it or to throw a trick play at you,”

CUTCLIFFE from page 9 wasn’t satisfied. Tennessee scored an impressive 27.8 points per game, yet it was short of his goal. Volunteer wideoutjosh Briscoe said Cutcliffe is a man who expects to meet his objectives.

“When he has goals and he doesn’t meet those goals, he takes it personally upon himself to figure out what went wrong and how he can make it better,” Briscoe said.

“He’s not going to except anything but 30 points a game, or more. He’ll do whatever he has to do as a coach, and that’s going to trickle down to the players.”

But it takes more than just smart playcalling and the occasional trick play to light up the scoreboard every week. Foster said Cutcliffe is successful because he gets the ball in his playmakers’ hands by

said Briscoe, who hauled in 56 catches for

557 yards last season. “It’s all about matchups.

Any time you can get a slot receiver matched

up with a linebacker or a safety, [Cutcliffe] has 20 ways that he can beat that guy. He’s going to give you whatever you need to compete and to beat that defender.”

As if that weren’t enough, Cutcliffe keeps defenses on its toes—or heels, as is the case usually—by executing a myriad of different formations and sharing touches all around. In addition to leading Tennessee in rushing last year, Foster also hauled in the fifth-most receiving yards because of Cutcliffe’s diverse and

ERTIFICATE

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machine for an offense. But he has also said Duke should be bowl-eligible next season, something it hasn’t been since 1994.

Sure, he is a man who says what he means and means what he says.

But should Duke believe him?

“Most definitely, without a doubt,” Foster said. “I would buy into everything that man has to say because he’s been there, he’s done that. He’s won national championships and SEC championships. He’s coached Pro Bowl quarterbacks and Super Bowl quarterbacks. He knows football.

“So if a man who knows football like that tells me we’re going to win, and he tell me something to do, I’m going to do it. I’m going to do everything he says, top to bottom.”

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being productive.”

So maybe Cutcliffe can deliver a scoring

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dously,” Foster said. “And once the game slows down, you play fast, and you end up

PROGRAM!

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balanced aerial approach.

The Blue Devils showed signs of this new look in a 100-play scrimmage last Saturday, when four receivers hauled in three catches or more. Boyette’s performance exemplified Cutcliffe’s creative playcalling. The running back registered four catches for 33 yards to complement his 65 yards on the ground.

Duke’s success will hinge on how well the Blue Devils adapt to Cutcliffe’s coaching style, Foster said. Namely, the veteran coach inundates his players with information about the offense as a whole, not stopping at each individual’s assignment.

The result? Everyone on the field knows what everyone else’s task is at all times.

“If you know what you’re doing, and why you’re doing it, and you know what someone else is doing and why they’re doing it, then the game slows down tremen-

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THE CHRONICLE

WEDNESDAY, APRIL 2,2008 I 13

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29 Element No. 86 30 A mean Amin 31 Scathing review 33 Economist John Maynard 37 Chat-room laughter letters 38 Hit the slopes 39 Apple choice 40 Kidnap victim 41 Plotted 42 Coming closer

(C)2008

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46 Outermost 47 Explanatory

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Student Advertising Coordinator: Account Assistants: Advertising Representatives:

Margaret Stoner Lianna Gao, Elizabeth Tramm Melissa Reyes Jack Taylor, Qinyun Wang Kevin O'Leary Marketing Assistant: National Advertising Coordinator: Cordelia Biddle, Charlie Wain Courier: Keith Cornelius Creative Services Coordinator: Alexandra Beilis Creative Services: Marcus Andrew, Rachel Bahman Sarah Jung, Maya Robinson Online Archivist: Roily Miller Business Assistants Rebecca Winebar, Percy Xu

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repeated in any column, row or box.)

1 6 7 9 8 9 7 8 1 9 8 6 3 9 4 8 7 1 9 4 1 6 7 5 9 4 6 7 www.sudoku.com

THE CHRONICLE

14 I WEDNESDAY, APRIL 2,2008

Demand answers from DPD

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Last

Wednesday, senior was the second name that Eric Halperin’s name needed to be cleared in as was officially cleared. manyyears no doubt seems to That day The Chronicle point to something suspicious, reported that all dmg-related and something that should be investigated charges more thoreditorial against the oughly in the senior had been dropped. The announceupcoming weeks ment came nearly one month But there are even some matters that are more certain after Durham Police Departin this case. First among these ment officials stormed into the Duke student’s off-campus is what definitely appears to house and arrested him on be an ongoing trend ofDPD’s charges of trafficking marimore-than-questionable tactics against Duke students—juana and possession of marisell. tactics for which both Duke with the intent to juana The reason for the Feb. and Durham have an obliga27 police invasion: Hal- tion to more fully hold the poperin—like current senior lice department accountable.

Given its draconian apRyan Packer a year before—had signed for a DHL packproach to thewould-be Februage that contained very large ary bust —in addition to its sordid history with Duke students amounts of marijuana.

The fact that Halperin’s in the past —it is unaccept-

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I would buy into everything that man has to say because he's been there, he's done that. He's won national championships and SEC championships. He's coached Pro Bowl quarterbacks and Super Bowl quarterbacks. He knows football.

Tennessee mnning back Arian Foster on new Duke head football coach David Cutcliffe. See story page 9.

LETTERS POLICY

purposes ofidentification, phone number and local address.

Letters should not exceed 325 words; contact the editorial department forinformation regarding guest columns.

The Chronicle will not publish anonymous or form letters or letters that are promotional in nature. The Chronicle reserves the right to edit letters and guest columns for length, clarity and style and the right to withhold letters based on die discretion of the editorial page editor.

Est. 1905

Direct submissions to

I

have this conflict ofinterest.

You see, I’m a member of the Senior Gift Committee who has not quite decided whether or not I will part with my $20.08 for the sake ofDuke or, more specifically, the Duke Annual Fund.

An annual tradition, the Senior Gift is a chancefor graduating Dukies to “give back to the University which has given you so much.”

Even as an underclassman, whenever I saw one of these posters on a campus bus I found my eyes kelley akhiemokhali

involuntarily rolling.

Editorial Page Department The Chronicle Box 90858, Durham, NC 27708 Phone; (919) 684-2663

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able if not entirely out of line.

After the DPD’s conduct fell under such harsh scrutiny following the lacrosse case, it would only make sense that the police department should respond in some form to the Halperin case. But it did not.

Meanwhile, when the Duke University Police Department was contacted last week, its officials did not know that the Halperin charges had been dropped and said they had not been in contact with the DPD about the case of late. Indeed, The Chronicle found out charges had been dropped only when Halperin himself came forward to the paper.

In this case, as in the past, both DPD and DUPD demonstrated that they had not learned lessons from

the past and still suffer from shortcomings in communication. This should not—and cannot —be the case moving forward.

The Duke administration, on the other hand, reportedly supported Halperin and his housemates in a commendable way, and Halperin was not immediately suspended. This time, it seems, administrators were able to leant from their all-too-evident shortcomings in the lacrosse case.

The administration should take their support a step further at this point and, in light of DPD’s egregious missteps in the past and DUPD’s apparent lack of attention to the present case, ask some hard questions of both police departments —but especially of Durham’s so-called finest.

To give or not to give

ontherecord

The Chroniclewelcomessubmissions in the form of letters to the editor or guest columns. Submissions must include the author’s name, signature, department or class, and for

able that DPD gave no comment to The Chronicle when charges against Halperin were dropped March 24.

Halperin’s housemate described Durham police and State Bureau of Investigation agents as having knocked down the door to 1026 W. Trinity Ave. Feb. 27. They reportedly carried assault rifles, dragged roommates across the floor and asked at least one of them to strip naked before finding nothing in the house.

Officials then proceeded to arrest Halperin for signing for the package of marijuana, but only after doing hundreds of dollars in damage to the house, the roommate said.

Even if residents of the house had been found guilty of a drug-related crime, this conduct would be question-

Quite frankly, the

hyphenated view

“Duke has given you so many opportunities” argument is not an adequate one. Duke has given me a lot of opportunities. And I also gave (or will give) Duke upwards of $BB,OOO once financial aid is calculated. I sure hope I got some opportunities after spending money like that.

Do I feel entitled? It depends on how you look at it. One of my former professors once told our class that Duke was a business and we—the students—should never forget that. If I follow his line of thinking, I’m entitled in the sense that I paid for a particular service and, therefore, I’m expecting a certain product (namely, my amazing education with all ofits opportunities) in return.

I’m not asking for an unfair advantage. I’m just asking not to be guilt-tripped.

Naturally, one could argue that a person can’t put a price on their education because the intangibles are invaluable. I agree. But we do put a price on our education every year. And it’s only rising.

Now, am I being hypocritical? Absolutely. In my application to the Senior Gift Committee I wrote that I wanted to be one voice who could speak to (not for) the people who do not feel intense loyalty toward Duke. I wanted to speak to the people who find thatDuke-the-monolith did not support them, but a particular student group did.

Instead, I found myself sitting quietly during the occasional meeting, surprised that I was still having this internal debate concerning whether or not to give to Duke. Wasn’t I supposed to be gung-ho by now?

I asked Kelly Suber, assistant director of the

Annual Fund and Young Alumni Program, how a person should respond to these criticisms. Her response in an e-mail: “Gifts to the various Duke Annual Funds provide support where it is needed most each year. Full tuition and fees have never covered the entire cost of a Duke education, nor will they in the foreseeable future.”

She went on to say that money from the Senior Gift fund is used to “provide resources to meet budget, to support existing academic programs, library resources, improved student services, competitive faculty salaries, research support and more.”

Once again, I remained unmoved. There comes a point in time when my simple brain cannot fathom how the University needs more money when every time I walk into the Marketplace I swear there’re new (non-edible) additions. Not to mention the plaza, which leaves me playing a game of hopscotch whenever I do not want my suede Pumas to receive the cool, misting spray.

I remained unmoved until I thought about how my gift may help those who never asked something of me to begin with. How it can go toward the Chapel, a place I visited numerous times whenever I felt as if I was one step away from losing my mind.

The Chapel never blocked my entrance because of an outstanding bill. Nor did the gardens, or the library system for that matter.

ACES, on the other hand, let me know very quickly that my (lack of) action was unacceptable.

As I see it, I’ll give to the places that I now consider home on campus. Places where I can take an emotional breather when it is next to impossible for me to simply board a plane and rest in my own hometown.

Yet some of these groups are not covered.

My response? Give to them anyway. I say give to your home, wherever it may be. If it falls under the Annual Fund’s auspices, great. If not, your support system will still be grateful for an extra $20.08 in its coffers.

Maybe it’s the senioritis talking, but I say that if giving to Duke is not up your alley—if the 80 percent participation rate in ’OB is not of concern to you—despite all the potential arguments, then don’t give. Case solved.

Kelley Akhiemokhali is a Trinity senior. Her column runs every other Wednesday.

THE CHRONICLE

commentaries

WEDNESDAY, APRIL 2,2008

I 15

One small fix for DSG Two I

'

years ago, at the end of my first halting stint as a Chronicle columnist, I celebrated the passing of the Duke Student Government general election by suggesting some sweeping changes to the whole system —most notably decreasing the presidential term to one semester and allowing every student to present legislation and vote at DSG Senate .v.'.: meetings. My column was promptly not picked up for the next semester. So now, as an older and wiser columnist, I’m going to do the exact same thing.

Oliver sherouse First, though, I should you tell me explain where we are right now. Simply put, nobody cares aboutDSG. In last week’s elections, turnout was about 40 percent, but it should be remembered that over a third ofthat figure came after outgoing senior and DSG President Paul Slattery sent out a pleading e-mail with the subject line “VOTE FOR DSG EXEC AND I’LL SHAVE MY HEAD!!”

And as amusing as a shorn Slattery would have been, it doesn’t say much about the state of the electorate that such childish clowning is required to draw more than a quarter of voters to the polls.

Am I admonishing the 60 percent ofmy fellow studentwho couldn’t be bothered to pay attention to their own student government? Quite the contrary: I can’t think of a single reason whythey should. I can’t think of a single thing DSG has done for me in the last three years. I can’t think of a single thing I would trust them to do. Even the most basic task of any governing body—ensuring its continuity, in this case by elections—seems to be beyond the abilities of our purported leaders, who seem quite content to play a game of pass-the-buck instead.

This sorry state of affairs is, unfortunately, self-perpetuating. Since DSG doesn’tdo anything ofactual value to students, the students most motivated by something approaching civic interest shy away from DSG, while the resume-builders and networkers insulate themselves in a clique which just moves its members one position up the ladder every year.

To be fair, students broke the mold two years ago by electing something of an outsider in senior Elliott Wolf, who immediately replaced the old greek clique with a new one consisting of himself, Slattery and recent candidate Kevin Troy, a junior.

And at the end of last week, that group was ousted by junior Jordan Giordano, who we’ve now elected three times to three offices, for no reason I can see other than that one candidate has to win.

Now, these are all nice enough guys in one way or another, and as a fellow columnist, I have great respect for Elliott in particular. But none of them has managed to build the faith of the student body in the process of student government.

So, considering all this, I’m going to reiterate my call for DSG Senate reform. I’ll give up the “elections every semester” idea because I don’t know that it would significantly affect the problems with the DSG government, and because otherwise the leaders of student groups who are forced to sit through interminable annual endorsement meetings would set me on fire. But it makes sense, if the executive is beyond reform, to take a look at how to improve the legislature.

The very idea that a population as small as the Duke student body needs representatives at all is rather suspect. The ancient city-state ofAthens was able to do without, and their government’s duties included building an empire and defeating Persia. So I think DSG would hardly fall apart if any student who bothered to show up to meetings was allowed to vote or offer legislation for consideration.

If the various vice presidents really need underlings to carry out whatever work they supposedly do, then we can elect permanent committees, either from the legislative meetings or at large. That way the resume-builders won’t be left out. But it just makes sense that anybody who is willing to come up with legislation ought to be able to offer it without having to jump through hoops or ingratiate themselves with a senator if they happen to know one. Itjust makes sense that if a student cares enough to show up for a vote, they should be able to do so.

This idea won’t solve all the problems with DSG, or even most of them, but it is a step in the right direction. At this point, I’ll take what I can get.

■

letterstotheeditor ‘Chomicle’ article crosses the line Tuesday’s satirical “Chomicle” article “China invades Duke; SAT scores rise” went beyond what would’ve been tasteful as an April Fool’s article.

As a Chinese-American student, I take great offense to the article that makes light of my grandparent’s sacrifice during China’s communist revolution and exploits false racial stereotypes for the purpose of humor. The systematic racial targeting ofAsians is a continual-problem in the United States and The Chronicle’s “joke” article only serves to perpetuate that behavior.

In addition to the racist statements in the article, its insinuation that all Chinese students are communists makes light of the struggles of many Chinese students’ parents and grandparents during the Chinese revolution. Jokes made at the expense ofAsians have long been a stalwart ofThe Chronicle’s humor columns, and although calls to change have occurred after every incident, they continue to emerge year after year. Just a few short weeks ago campus organizations came together in support of the International Day for the Elimination ofRacial Discrimination. It is disappointing to see that the school paper, “The Tower of Campus Thought and Action,” has so blatandy disregarded the lessons of that day under the pretense of comedy.

The Chronicle should look carefully at and consider the consequences of the articles that it prints, especially articles written as jokes with little journalistic merit.

Cristian Liu President, Asian Students Association Pratt ’OB ASA official decries ‘yellow journalism’ Comrades and Caucasians: As a high-standing official of Duke’s Asian Students Association, I was deeply disappointed to read the vicious lies as published by the radical left-wing “Chomicle” this April Fool’s. I can assure you that these claims are false and baseless, and any attempts to raise racial and ideological stereotypes on campus will be doomed to failure.

First let me strongly condemn the use of the word “invades” in the headline of such yellowjoumalism—absolutely no pun intended. Asians have as strong a claim to Duke that goes back 5,000 years—or at least as long as the not-so-ancient greeks. What’s that I see? A railroad between East (Campus) and West? But I digress....

We would like to thank Comrade Gu Ten Ta Ge for his unwavering support. And a word of advice for Chairman Dick: if you must rise, rise peacefully!

Sincerely, ASA’s Titillating Titular Head ofPolitical Affairs.

PS. On a more serious note, this hasn’t been the first time The Chronicle has engaged in unconstructive stereotyping of the Asian community at Duke. Although having an Asian fetish at Duke is not uncommon, and while ASA appreciates a goodApril Fool’sjoke, perhaps humor might be used more effectively to satirize some of the pertinent problems we face on campus, rather than retreading old jokes and stereotypes.

There were bats on Central for crying out loud.

Bats.

Maybe you should open your eyes a little—or are they open? We can’t tell.

Muyan Jin Trinity ’O9

RLHS mishandling of Room Pix unacceptable By now, most students have been made aware of Residence Life and Housing Services’ serious blunder regarding Room Pix ’OB. We call on RLHS to respond swiftly and responsibly to correct this situation. In order to ensure that those affected by this mistake enjoy an acceptable living arrangement next year, RLHS must: 1. Ensure that independents are not forced to live in selective living group sections. Independents should be afforded the same treatment as members of SLGs. Their right to be independent should be honored by respecting their choice not to live in a SLG section. 2.

Ensure that every person living in a block has consented to move, before relocating all or some of a block. For many students, blocking is a valued alternative to SLGs and splitting blocking communities would be irresponsible and unacceptable. 3. Ensure that ALL sophomores are given residence on West Campus as promised.

If RLHS is unable to meet these expectations, we call for new leadership in residence life that is capable of leading the department effectively. Likewise, we call on our peers in Campus Council to work with Vice President of Student Affairs Larry Moneta to identify more competent leadership who can honor Duke students’ threeyear living agreements with RLHS. Just as students cannot shirk their contractual obligation with RLHS, RLHS cannot shirk its contractual obligation with students.

Jordan Giordano President-elect, Duke Student Government Trinity ’O9 Sunny Kantha Executive vice president-elect, DSG Trinity ’O9 Lauren Maisel Vice president for student affairs-elect, DSG Trinity ’O9

A potential solution to the RLHS mishap I would like to express my disappointment and outrage to Residence Life and Housing Services for not foreseeing the issue concerning thelimited number offemale beds on West Campus. The problem was apparent to anyone who had seen the Room Fix numbers before room selection began. Why the issue was not addressed earlier—or at least explained to the students who might be affected—l am not sure.

I, however, would like to propose a solution. According to the numbers, about 7.5 percent of Duke females are considered “attractive” on the national scale approved by their peers. This means that 4.125 of the girls who have been left homeless are attractive. I will make it my personal mission to find these 4.125 people a place to sleep.

While I am sure that I can accommodate at least 2.125 per night by myself, I have no doubt that I will be able to find others willing to share their space with the other two. I am glad to do my part to alleviate this situation, and I hope that others with lower standards will do their part in order to make sure that no sophomore females are forced to sleep alone. On Central.

Christopher Carlon Trinity ’ll

Oliver Sherouse is a Trinity junior. His column runs every other Wednesday.

16 | WEDNESDAY, APRIL 2,2008

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