BADideas. Vol. IV

TABLE OF CONTENTS

Leader Of Men, Builder Of Boys Smilin’ Through Pain The Mission

Life Lessons

Leader of Men, Builder of Boys

Meet Derrick McBride (a.k.a Coach Mac.) After 11 years of coaching, this year proved to be a unique one. Due to COVID shutting down his prior organization, Coach Mac is now the Head Coach of the Jets 8U team.

Plot twist; the team has ONLY four 8 yearolds.

How do you handle that pressure on top of coaching?

It's no pressure. I call myself a leader of men, a builder of boys. A real Alpha male.

How do you handle parental objections to your methods?

How long have you been coaching?

I

’ve been coaching little league for 11 years. Four years of high school JV and freshman before that.

This is the way I coach. My coaching style isn't for every parent or every kid. I refer those parents to other teams who have coaches that care what a parent thinks.

How did you come into this position?

What is your favorite aspect of coaching?

This position is the Jets 8u HC: I came here because my organization shut down for covid. The Southfield Falcons where I was the 8u HC as well.

Winning !!! Taking some team that's not known for a winner and kicking a**.

How do you separate yourself between coach and parent when coaching your son?

Describe your coaching style.

Aggressive. I'm not a nice coach. I coach my players like they are in an army. They love it.

I don't know why but the kids love being pushed to perfection.

From a player’s perspective, a coach normally serves as a leader/father figure.

Coach Mac

Daddy doesn't exist until after the game or practice. My kid calls me coach in the field. I treat him worse than the other kids because I don't have to worry about his parents getting mad.

What is the most difficult aspect of coaching?

What advice would you give someone interested in coaching?

The daily grind. Coaching takes up the prime time of the day. M-F 6-8. Which is really 530-9. Coaching in itself is easy and fun.

Describe your proudest moment so far.

This year is probably my best work. My 8U team has four 8 year-olds and only two of those kids played tackle football. I'm basically coaching a 7U team and I'm undefeated this season. This team is a shadow of the team I had with the Falcons.

But when the Falcons shut down the 8 yearolds went to other teams. The 7-year-old parents trusted me and rolled with me.

What quality do you think every successful coach should?

What personal gain do you get out of coaching?

This is fun for me. I'm not a coach that says “I do this for the kids.” I do this for me.

Instead of partying, I coach for fun.

Throughout this entire process, what have you learned about yourself?

I've learned that I can be a huge asshole. I always knew I was one, but I’m horrible lol.

But this year I also learned I am a pretty damn good coach. That's something I have never said. Just thought I knew enough and was just smarter than other coaches.

In your opinion what’s the most important lesson you can teach your son?

What I stress every day is “Do everything to the best of your ability. If you gonna do it, be great at it.”

Most important lesson you’ve learned as a father?

Kids like your time over money. Work what's needed. You are your kids favorite toy.

The ability to learn and take criticism.

This sounds selfish but do it for yourself.

When you do it for yourself you seek perfection from yourself FIRST. Everything turns into your fault. Then everyone else will seek perfection in themselves.

How did your relationship with your father impact your relationship with your son?

Love my dad to death. He is one of my best friends. He just wasn't a good FATHER. He wasn't raised or taught to be one. He grew up with a different life, so I don't blame him.

My father, whose name I carry with pride, taught me so much; the streets, how to drive, how to ride a motorcycle, how to care for dogs. I learned all those things at a very very young age. All things I still do. I took my father stripped him of all the "bad parent". I added all the things I wanted in a father. That is me today responsible enough to raise a man but irresponsible enough to let my boy be a boy.

Online Poll

“Live

life with your kids, on their level, as much as possible. Rediscover and reshape your understanding of everything as you teach them.“ Justin D. 36| Father of 1

“At a certain point you have to let them go out on their own. They have to make their own mistakes so they can learn from it” Bobby H. 46 | Father of 8 “Patience. You don't have to become your parents.”

Randy R. 36 | Father of 2 “Do everything you can to not miss those important moments, memories is all...”

Jose T. 45 | Father Of 4 “Love to the fullest, be patient, put in the effort, take pictures, cherish every second.....the good, bad, and the ugly. You can't control everything. Be flexible and make the best of every situation. Also, don't forget to take care of yourself. Invest in your family.”

Patrick M. 29 | Father of 1

“You have to learn to love unconditionally. Be the person your kids could look up to.”

Jerome H. 33 | Father Of 3

What’s the most important lesson you’ve learned as a father?

3KJ Smilin’ Through Pain We all carry some form of trauma rather we like to admit it or not. No matter the cause we all need some form of therapeutic stress relief to alleviate the need for less productive measures. Meet 3KJ, who shares how he found his stress relief in music, his views on the younger generation, his musical journey, and more.

I was in a dark place when I started rapping, it was affecting my relationship with my kids. I drank my life away and rapping offered a healthier outlet and pulled me out of depression, so I could be a better father figure. I feel my kids deserve the world and music can provide that if I just stay consistent.

How long have you been recording music?

Despite expressing your pain and trauma you expressed a lot of swagger and wittylyricism. Where does your sound come from?

I

started recording in the 9th grade, it was me and a couple of my homies. He had a setup in his dining room.

When did you decide to start taking it seriously?

When I got out the military, I used to chill with the homies, we would drink and freestyle. One of them told me I should go record something and see what it'll do. So I found a studio and made it happen. When I posted a snippet of the song on IG, FB, and Twitter it got a lot of buzz, it was even posted on SayCheeseTV. So thats when I really decided to keep going. Plus it was a good outlet for the things I was going through at the time.

3KJ, those are my kids' initials; King, Kayden, Kylen and Jayce. That’s who I do this for.

How has fatherhood inspired you to pursue your music career?

What is your favorite record from “Trauma’s Son?” Why? I would say False Smiles, cause even though I experienced a lot of trauma in my childhood I had some good times too, and I didn’t realize everything I went through had an affect on me until I became an adult.

Throughout my childhood my head was just in the clouds.

Describe the recording process.

Why 3KJ?

I can't really say. When I first started rapping I want to be like Meek. I took that and put my own style into it.

It's simple for me; to record a song I take usually around 15 to 20 minutes because I practice so much before I even go to the studio.

You opened up a lot about your past on “Trauma’s Son.” You saw a lot at an early age. How did that affect you as an

adolescent? What motivated you to stay on track?

What can we expect in 2021?

In a way it messed my head up I didn't react to certain situations as others would because of it. At the same time, it made me want to be different and not become a product of my environment.

In 2021, I definitely going way harder; dropping more videos, doing more shows and just applying pressure all year around.

2021 is looking good. [I’m] Working on a new album as we speak.

What does music mean to you?

In your opinion, what’s the most important lesson you can teach your children?

In so many words its therapeutic “RNS” gave me lecture vibes. How important is it to make sure we educate the younger generation?

Me being a father, I think it's very important, considering we are the black sheep of America. We are already targeted.

It's up to us to guide the youth in the right direction so we can succeed as a whole.

What’s your biggest song so far?

My biggest song to date is Switch Up. On “N2Deep” you made it clear you would NOT sign. What makes you want to take the independent route?

Just doing my research, a lot of these record labels are playing artists and they control your entire career. I can't have that. I don't need anybody regulating when I can drop music or what’s good enough to be put out.

And I’m for sure not trying to be in debt to. anyone because when you sign that's basically a loan.

The most important lesson to teach my kids for me would be, how to be resilient. Cause in life your going to go through trials and tribulations. But they need to know that they can always bounce back and it’s not the end of the world. If you feel like you you’ve hit rock bottom, the only way you can go from there is is up.

Trauma’s Son is the perfect body of work to enjoy during solo late night car rides or just sitting back vining and friends. 3KJ takes us through a glimpse of the trauma he’s endured growing up in Detroit, over heavy yet melodic beats. Despite the trials and tribulations he’s suffered he still manages to smile through the pain for the sake of his little ones and their bright future ahead.

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PERSONAL FAVORITES TRAUMA’S SO WHERE I’M FRO JUNGL FALSE SMILE RN NEXT TO BLO

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CHECK OUT “Traumas Son” ON APPLE MUSIC

SSG MARK MEDLOCK THE MISSION

M

y role is to command the tank and all of its crew members. That means working to train and lead their crew into a cohesive team effectively and efficiently. I command every aspect of the tank’s operation. It means ensuring their tank is in peak performance, so it functions properly when needed. I operate in the Commanders station of the tank to complete tasks such as designating targets, firing the main gun weapon systems and secondary weapon systems (machine guns, etc.), and taking over some operations if other crew members are injured/killed. Nobody does anything without me on that Tank.

What do you love about your job?

The main thing I love about my job is the chemistry between myself and my crews.

You create a bond like never before in the military because you go through serious shit together. I am grateful for the people that I have formed life long relationships with.

How does it feel being thousands of miles away from you family for a long period of time? How do you cope?

When I am away from my family, I am okay.

When you deploy you are in a different zone, mentally and physically. My body and

mind were in peak performance when I was In Korea. I missed the hell out of my family but I knew what I was doing benefitted all of us.

What has been the biggest success of your career?

The biggest success of my career was holding my family together throughout the past 5 years. All of this military shit will be finished one day, my wife and kid will be here forever. I have an obligation to them to be the best husband and father I can be. I take pride in that over anything in the military so that is my biggest success.

What has been the biggest failure?

My biggest failure was living in Texas and being broke as hell when I first got married.

No one could tell me shit about money because I thought I had it all. I put my family in financial turmoil and I had to drag us all out of it while maintaining my composure. It was rough.

What’s your favorite place you’ve been deployed?

I’ve only deployed to Korea. It was fire for the culture, but bad for my wife. She was pregnant the entire time I was deployed and I couldn’t be there to watch Isaiah being born. Other than

As Tank Commander what is your official role?

that, Korea was a needed experience. My outlook on life changed while I was deployed and returned home a better husband and an excited father.

What made you join the military?

I literally joined the military because I bullshitted my way through high school and shit at home was rough so I left and didn’t tell anyone. I remember saying to myself “I want to leave my parents' house before they tell me to get out” and I did. When I got in the military, I was really good at it. I made the most money I ever made in the first 6 months of my career and now I’m just using the government how they use my black ass lmao.

What motivates you to keep going?

The future keeps me motivated. I am working towards my Bachelor's Degree in Cybersecurity, my wife is working towards her degree, and Isaiah is working towards whatever he wants to do lmao. I know my future is bright because of the way I set myself up. All I have to endure is this last contract in the military and then I can leave and be comfortable.

In your opinion what is the most important lesson you can teach your son?

The main thing I want to teach Isaiah is how to be susceptive and understanding.

His world will be completely different from mine and I want him to realize how important it is accept people for who they are and who they want to be. He will never judge someone based on religion, orientation, gender, etc. because he will never see me do that. I don’t worry about the rest because he has great parents and he will be successful.

What’s the most important lesson you’ve learned as a father?

The most important lesson I’ve learned as a father was to always put Isaiah first. I was never a selfish person before becoming a father, but I looked out for me and only me.

Now that Isaiah is growing and gaining knowledge, I’ve basically gotten into the habit of putting him first.

How did your relationship with your father impact your relationship with your son?

My parents were weird. They spent a lot of time dealing with my sister’s misfortunes so I kinda was one my own for a while and became very distant. My pops was there physically, but mentally/emotionally, he was lacking. I learned a lot of things based on how I was treated coming up and I promised myself I would never treat Isaiah like this.

What is the most important lesson you can teach your children?

Online Poll

“Other people opinions don’t matter “ -Donald F. 34 | Father Of 2 “For them to be themselves and to be a leader and not a follower. Also, to do what makes them happy in life.”

-Joshua B. 32 | Father Of 2 “Life is what you make it, don’t won’t for a savior! Learn something new whenever you can and keep progressing.”

-Jeffon R. 24 | Father Of 2 “Never let anyone or anything control a position in your life that impacts your life decisions outside of yourself.”

-Demetrius T. 31 | Father Of 2 “Honestly i would say no matter what or who comes in to your life always stay true to yourself and in what you believe in . But its so many more lessons that need to be instilled” -Arron C. 26 | Father Of 1

“The important lesson I teach is self-respect because at the end of the day everyone wants to be respected. If you can’t respect yourself you can believe your going to receive respect or you don’t know how to give respect as well. I know my kids are young but when I’m teaching them I make them give eye contact. I always tell them to always make eye contact with the person you speaking to it show’s character in a person and it shows a sign of respect it also show no fear. I tell my kids if they show fear it gives ppl open windows to disrespect your character as a human being and most likely other ppl will see and they feel its ok to disrespect that person and thats when bullying and all that other shit comes in to play. There's a lot of lessons I teach my sons but that is one that sticks out to me the most because they won't have fear of failure or even make big decisions in life and be on a path of success. Self respect can be use for deeper conversation that can go different ways its a lot bro. That’s the most important lesson to me” -Reshard D. 32 | Father Of 2

Wade Sr. Life Lessons As I journey into fatherhood I find myself reaching out to father more and more to explain life ‘man to man’ now opposed to ‘man to boy.’ “I didn’t get to 51 being stupid,” my dad’s way of saying “put some respeck on my age.”

day I learned to never say “what,” to my dad ever again. In any form!

What’s the most important lesson you learned from your father?

“Lil boy you gon’ let that money burn a hole in your pocket,” in other words; just because you got some money, don’t be in such a hurry to spend it. “Lil boy you ain’t happy unless your balls in a vice,” in other words; when things are going good don’t try to fuck it up by getting in trouble. “Lil boy you need a handle on that thing?” In other words; stop pissing on the toilet and floor.

A

lways have a side hustle. And always keep a $100 bill in your wallet.

What’s your favorite memory of your father?

My dad always spoiled me. One day we went to pick up a moped. I was so happy. It cost $439.75. While my dad was peeling off the $439, I quickly dug into my 13 year-old pockets to slam 3 quarters on the counter.

The look my dad gave me was priceless.

Like,”yeah thanks son.” Bonus memory; my dad had a habit of calling me to him to tell me what he wanted. If I’m downstairs, he would make me come upstairs to tell me to bring him a glass of water. One day I got tired of it. This time when he called me(he was upstairs) I said “WHAT!!” All of a sudden it got quiet. We had carpet in the house, so I didn’t hear him coming. I was looking through the glass of our front door. When I turned around my dad was standing there. He said no words. He punched me in my chest real hard and walked away. That

What are a few sayings you learned from your father growing up? How do you apply them to your everyday life?

You lost your dad early into your journey into fatherhood. How did this impact you as a young husband and father?

It made me want to live longer. Made me take my health more seriously. Incorporate more vitamins, less drinking. Fitness.

When you first become a father what was the biggest change had to make?

The biggest change I had to make was I had to stop bullshitting. Work, hustle and make money. I used to look at my first born and couldn’t believe she depended on ME. I knew I had to provide for her, by any means necessary. Before her, it was an option. After her, it was a must. So I worked and sold drugs with no remorse. But I knew I could never totally commit to drug game because I needed to be around to raise my kids. I was always my own boss when I sold drugs.

Throughout my life, you’ve always said “The older I get, the smarter my father gets.”

Explain that statement.

My dad always talked to me one on one.

Some of the things he was telling me I didn’t understand or didn’t know how to apply them. As I’ve aged I can now apply them because they fit the life of a grown man and not the 13-year-old he was telling it to. It’s like he was giving me a pair of pants that I couldn’t fit at the time. The older I got, the better those pants fit. They’re real tight now!

Nut huggers *lol*. I get everything he was saying now. Sometimes you not ready for some things. But as a parent you still plant the seed. And one day it blossoms.(if your lucky) the “burn a hole in your pocket” is a classic example. I get that one now.

How did you use your past experiences to help guide your children?

The word “no.” I didn’t hear it enough as a kid. So I used that to great effect raising my kids. I was never afraid to say “no,” no matter what. No matter who didn’t like it, no matter if everybody in the house was mad at me. I denied my kids going places that they wanted to go, things they wanted to do

because I didn’t hear it enough. I was a spoiled brat. I spoiled my kids but I never hesitated to say “hell no!” Being the bad guy in the family is not fun, but it’s necessary. I don’t regret it.

In your opinion what’s the biggest difference between raising a daughter and raising a son?

With girls you have to be gentle, but firm.

They have strong emotions that have to be dealt with very carefully. They WILL hate you at some point for one reason or another.

Especially in their teens, because you have to say “no” a lot and they don’t like that.

However, they will never challenge you physically. They fear getting a whooping from daddy, or fear daddy’s loud angry voice. With a boy, you can have more fun; twinning outfits, sports, fishing, girl talk etc, etc. Now at some point, your son WILL challenge you physically. And that is probably the hardest thing in the world to deal with.

Teenage testosterone in a son is dangerous

and in some cases deadly. It’s all about emotions with the girls and testosterone with the boys. Those two things are the cornerstone of dealing with boys and girls in my opinion.

You were famous for giving a long lecture during punishment. Why was it so important for you to make sure we had a clear explanation as to why we were being punished?

My kids never got punished for the same thing twice. I always felt like my explanations were worse than the belt. I wanted to shame them and make them feel stupid if they ever did the same shit again.

The whooping will hurt and stop hurting.

The explanation will last long after the incident.

Looking back, what was your biggest mistake as a father?

Beating up on myself for so long for my short comings and mistakes. I tried to appear as this perfect dad but I’m human. I wasted a lot of years beating myself up when I did the best job I could. I never left my kids — ever. Not too many people can say they were with their kids from the time they were born ‘til they moved out for good. I didn’t give myself enough credit for being the good father I

was. I was an example of what a good father should be to a lot of my friends. My biggest mistake was not accepting that I’m not perfect. When my kids realized I wasn’t perfect, I hung my head, instead of explaining that their super dad is just a man. But my love is bond.

What’s the most important lesson you’ve learned as a father?

The time, love, and conversations you have with your kids is more important than any gift or anything that comes out of your pocket. I used to talk my kids head off and I’m glad I did because none of them are stupid. You can’t run no bullshit by my kids.

They will recognize it because I prepared them. One of my dads most infamous sayings was,”I’m immune to bullshit,” so I made sure my kids are immune to it too.

The most important lesson I learned from my father.

Time spent is worth more than any amount of money. The memories I cherish the most are the times of us just riding in the caddy watching Training Day or shooting jumpers in the backyard. My father wasn’t perfect and he made a thousand mistakes, and honestly I appreciate him making those mistakes so I DON’T have to go through them. Good or bad my father was always there, dedicating his life to molding us into respectable human beings. The most important lesson I learned from my father is to always be present, good or bad, be present to set the example.