davidsonian.com
Racist and antisemitic vandalism found in outdoor classroom
Volume 121,
Issue 19
Baseball sees better scores following a rocky start to the season
A peep behind the scenes of Rico Nasty’s Frolics performance
2 4 6 8
Hazing is a prevalent issue on college campuses across the country, and Davidson’s campus is no exception. In recent weeks, allegations of hazing have been raised against the Sigma Phi Epsilon fraternity (SPE). While further information and sanctions have not been formally announced, the accusations have raised questions about how Patterson Court Council (PCC), the Student Activities office, and the Dean of Students office confront and deal with hazing.
North Carolina General Statute 14-35 prohibits hazing, and hazing practices are also forbidden by the Code of Responsibility
As Shakaya Walcott, the Assistant Director of Student Activities for Fraternities and Sororities, explained, “we don’t tolerate [hazing] at all here at Davidson and definitely not within our PCC organizations.”
Hazing can take several forms, but, according to the Washington Post, all hazing rituals can harm students. The Davidson Public Safety office defines hazing as “any action taken or situation created intentionally whether on or off campus, to produce mental, emotional, or physical discomfort, embarrassment, harassment, or ridicule.”
These practices may contribute to serious injury or death. The Washington Post reported that a San Diego State student was left with deteriorating health, depression, and posttraumatic stress disorder after severe hazing rituals. He attempted to return to school but had to drop out due to cognitive impairment. Hazing jeopardizes students’ physical and mental health, and in doing so, it negatively impacts campus communities.
Several Davidson organizations have strategies to control hazing, including the Student Activities office.
“I personally meet with all of my organizations and provide them a hazing prevention workshop and tell them plenty of times during the workshop that we will not tolerate any form of hazing no matter how subtle or harsh the incident,” Walcott explained.
Similarly, Assistant Director of Student Activities Mike Goode believes that preventing hazing is an important part of his work.
“Student activities folks have the
responsibility of working with student organizations to try to help them be the best that they can be. We are very clear that hazing is not a part of that or at least should not be a part of that,” Goode said.
The PCC executive board also wants to discourage hazing.
“Hazing is not a part of the culture [that PCC works] hard to cultivate and support on campus,” PCC president Sadie Murphy ‘23 explained. “In fact, all PCC organizations
unfortunate but common aspect of higher education.”
If hazing occurs, students can submit reports through an anonymous reporting form on the Dean of Students website. Once these reports are filed, the Dean of Students office investigates the information, determines responsibility, and considers reasonable sanctions.
According to Mak Tompkins, Director of Student Rights and Responsibilities, the
program or faculty-led trip because of their social probation status.”
At maximum, individuals accused of hazing may be permanently suspended from Davidson. Organizations that haze students may have their privileges suspended for an academic year, or suspended indefinitely.
“We aim to be highly educational and restorative in nature when it comes to identifying sanctions for any case (not just hazing),” Tompkins said. “The process [of deciding sanctions] is pretty individualizedthere is not a one size fits all model when it comes to sanctions and outcomes.”
The Student Activities Office makes it clear that there are several ways for organizations to bond without physically or emotionally harming students.
“[The Student Activities office is] always happy to talk to student organizations about how they can build community within their organization in ways that are not based on power dynamics and taking advantage of people who are looking to join an organization,” Goode said. “We understand fully the idea of belonging and building a sense of connection, and we’re really clear that there are great ways to do that that do not involve hazing.”
Rather than forcing pledges to impress older fraternity members, Goode suggests fraternities could focus on building balanced relationships within their organizations.
Similarly, Walcott wants Davidson to “be the difference” among colleges by ending hazing practices.
must submit a Hazing Compliance Form to the Student Activities office, which represents their commitment to not hazing their members.”
While organizations around campus try to prevent hazing, the possibility still exists.
Michael Callahan ‘24, the Interfraternity Council representative on the PCC executive board and a member of SPE hopes “that hazing is not a part of Davidson’s overall culture.” However, he acknowledges that “hazing will occur where power imbalances exist.”
According to the Washington Post, hazing exploits pledges’ hopes to impress older fraternity brothers and make friends. The practice does so to a toxic extent and can drive dangerous behavior.
Likewise, Walcott sees hazing as “an
college “[uses] a ‘clear and convincing’ evidence standard” to investigate the legitimacy of allegations. This standard is used in colleges across the country, and as Tompkins explained, it “means the evidence must be highly and substantially more likely to be true than untrue.”
Hazing sanctions can vary. According to Davidson’s Public Safety office, the typical minimum punishment for individuals who engage in hazing practices is disciplinary probation for an academic year. This probation is social rather than academic, but according to Vice President of Student Life Byron McCrae, “an academic program may inquire about a student’s disciplinary status and it could be the case a student may not be permitted to participate in a study abroad
“I hope that Davidson students and the students I work with in PCC understand the true values of brotherhood and sisterhood,” Walcott said. “In no way, shape, or form should harm in any way be a part of that culture.”
While Davidson’s stance on hazing is clear, there is still uncertainty surrounding the allegations raised against SPE. Investigations are ongoing, and in the meantime, the fraternity is on social probation and thier formal was canceled.
Regardless of the outcome of the hazing allegations, Callahan still sees an opportunity for change.
“Organizations can work on bettering themselves through mindful changes to tradition,” he said. He hopes that these shifts will help make “new members feel welcome and wholly accepted from the day bids are signed.”
Every student at Davidson is expected to both sign and abide by the honor code— an ironclad document that prohibits academic dishonesty. In a similar vein, the code of responsibility serves to hold students accountable for their actions outside of the classroom. However, these codes can only go so far to ensure that students understand and recognize the minority, especially disabled, populations on campus.
In her honors thesis for the communication studies department, Gabby Morreale ‘23, a member of the Davidson Disability Alliance
(DDA), researched how discussions of disability in Davidson’s campus sculptures are largely neglected, and what kinds of implications this practice has on student, faculty, and staff understandings of Davidson’s values of academic and moral integrity.
“Within this thesis, I realized that disability does not academically or morally contribute to the enactment of the honor code. So, some of the values that we think about such as cocreating community or carrying out social responsibilities— accessibility and disability are not part of it.”
Over the past few weeks, members of the DDA have seen an increase in the mistreatment of tools for the disabled community.
Handicapped parking spots have been used by non-disabled students, and handicap push buttons around campus have stopped working, hindering access to buildings for students who need it most.
Sarah Todd Hammer ‘24, the president of the DDA, reported the damage to the Davidson Physical Plant. She stated that “the main reason the door buttons break is that students are kicking them, smacking them, smashing them— so much so that the internal parts are broken.”
Following this, the Student Government Association (SGA) and DDA hosted a joint event for students to make signs for doors around campus to emphasize the importance
of treating the door buttons with care.
Morreale attributes this lack of care about tools for the disabled community to how “people don’t consider a particular practice or instance as an act of accessibility.”
“I used to have an accommodation of clear masks during the pandemic so that I could read people’s lips easier,” Morreale said. “And without it, conversations were muffled, and I couldn’t get it. And so clear masks were enacted in one of my classes, and, you know, we had the masks, we had as many as we needed and if people ran out, we would give them more. Unfortunately, that practice lasted
Ablackboard in an outdoor classroom was found covered with racist and antisemitic graffiti this past weekend. Drawings of a swastika and monkeys were scrawled across the board, along with a message referencing the death of Jews and Black people.
An image of the blackboard began circulating on the social media app YikYak
bigotry exist in our society, it is still shocking and distressing when they show up on campus in such a bold and aggressive way and with messages of violence,” the email stated. “This violation wounds people we love and value. We all need to recognize and respect their pain.”
Elaiya Een ‘26 is a member of the Jewish Student Union and found out about the graffiti from other students in the organization.
“I looked at it, and I was like, ‘Oh, my God, we have been hate crimed’. It was deeply, deeply disturbing too because it wasn’t a
be taken regarding the graffiti.
“I wish that there was more transparency about what they were doing to find out, and how they were going to be responding once they knew,” Een said.
Maia Ferreyra ‘26 found out about the graffiti from the campus-wide email, and like Een, was concerned about what she viewed as a lack of transparency.
“The administration didn’t really do a good job of explaining what happened,” Ferreya said. “They kind of just said there were some hateful symbols written on the blackboard and
Diversity and Inclusion’s website states that “while the center engages all students, faculty and staff in diversity, inclusion and equity efforts on campus” specific support is offered to students of color, students of diverse genders and sexualties, first-generation students and undocumented students.
While frustrated with the administration’s response, both Een and Ferreya acknowledged recent steps they have taken to recognize Davidson’s racist and antisemitic history.
“I think that it’s important that this administration is putting in an effort to make
on Sunday, however, most students remained unaware of the incident until Monday morning when a campus-wide email was sent out on behalf of President Dough Hicks, along with the Dean of Faculty Shelly Rigger and the Dean of Students Byron McCrae.
“We are aware of racist and antisemitic graffiti found on a blackboard in an outdoor classroom that also appeared on social media,” the email began. “This act is threatening and an affront to the sense of community that binds us.”
The administration went on to emphasize the importance of cultivating a feeling of safety on campus and supporting “those who feel targeted.”
“Even though we know that racism and
microaggression which I feel like wouldn’t be rare on this campus, but something so blatantly disgusting. [It is] egregious,” Een said.
Een highlighted what she saw as an absence of student responses.
“I think that this campus is a very inclusive place, but obviously, it is a predominantly white Christian institution,” Een said. “I think that it does a decent job supporting its students, the thing that I think lacks here the most comes less from an administrative level.
It is more of the lack of activism on campus in general that is jarring to me, coming from a very progressive high school where activism took up a large percentage of my extracurriculars.”
Een also pointed to a lack of clarity from the administration on what specific action would
that they’re trying to find who did it. It just seemed very censored, like they were scared to admit what was on it.”
Isabelle Polgar ‘25 also felt as though the communication from the administration was very general, and a missed opportunity to reach out to the students who were directly targeted by the racist and antisemitic messaging.
“The email didn’t feel like it was targeting students who actually are Jewish,” Polgar said. “For example, they were like, ‘if you need help, you can go to the Center for Diversity and Inclusion’. The Center for Diversity and Inclusion will not help Jewish students specifically.”
The email referred students to the Center for Diversity and Inclusion, the Chaplain’s Office, and the Counseling Center. The Center for
the sculpture for example, and reckon with the history of the school,” Een said. “I think that it’s kind of concerning that they hadn’t done it beforehand, obviously that was under a different administration.”
Ferreya highlighted the need for greater awareness among the student body, and the responsibility of the college to take accountability for their past.
“I think that they’re doing kind of a better job, from what I can tell, and are exposing Davidson’s past,” Ferreya said. “I still think that there’s a lot that the majority of the student body doesn’t really know about Davidson’s racist past, or current issues with racism.”
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about two weeks in the class, and then people stopped wearing them, and just went back to their regular masks.”
Rui Rui Bleifus ‘26, the vice president of DDA believes that “it is partly on students to educate themselves on the topic of disability, and then once educating themselves holding each other accountable. However, it is also on Davidson, as an institution, to prioritize and value disability.”
The primary administrative outlet for the DDA is the Office for Academic Access and Disability Resources (AADR). However, their work is not geared specifically towards students with disabilities.
“[The AADR is] seen as our office, which they are, but they’re also for any student who wants or needs help with academics,” Hammer said. “So, they are for us, but they’re not just for us. And it’s a very medicalized view of disability to have that be our sole place.”
To remedy this, the DDA sought to be included in the Center for Student Diversity and Inclusion (CDI).
“The Center for Student Diversity and Inclusion does not claim disability as a diverse identity on this campus, and I think that is extremely harmful,” Bleifuss said “Not only is it sending the message to students that being disabled is not a marginalized identity, but then it is also extremely unaffirming to the students who identify under the identities they do claim. As an Asian student, they accept me, but as a disabled one, they don’t. How can I, and other students, truly be supported if they don’t see my intersectional identities?”
According to Yolanda Gilliam, the Interim Director for the CDI, the Center offers specific support to students of
color, the LGBTQ+ community, first-generation students, and undocumented students— but their engagement and support ranges beyond those four groups as well.
“We try to amplify [the DDA’s] activism and their programming, and we are here to support DDA, just as we do with any organization,” Gilliam said. “For example, I don’t believe in recreating the wheel, so if there’s something that they’re doing, we can help amplify that and get it out across campus— we often will take on that role.”
Additionally, the CDI looks for opportunities to collaborate with campus organizations.
“Recently, I asked a student staff member who serves as a liaison between us and DDA, to get insight on the opportunity to bring a disabled dance troupe to campus to help educate about disability. It seemed like a great way to collaborate with the DDA,” Gilliam said. “We are having some further conversations about bringing that troop to campus.”
Both the DDA and CDI agree that the student body needs to be more cognizant of the disabled community.
“Folks need to understand what the consequences are to their actions, meaning, for example, their classmates and schoolmates literally can’t get into spaces if the door mechanisms are broken,” Gilliam said.
Hammer highlights how “most people without disabilities don’t even realize the importance of access devices. It’s more of a convenience thing for them. So when [these devices] break it’s merely an inconvenience for them, but for us, it’s our independence on the line.”
The DDA continues to host events, bring in speakers, and use social media to educate the community about disability. However, without official recognition, their messages of activism and advocacy are met with ignorance.
“During my thesis, someone told me ‘disabled people have historically been active in a lot of different movements in US history.’ But they have been overlooked. We have this whole history being in those movements, for so many groups that are on Davidson’s campus, the civil rights movements, or reproductive movements,” Morreale said. “These groups that are protected by the CDI, included us, but then to not include disability would be a disservice to those people, right? Davidson prides itself on being like an inclusive institution, so again, to not include disability, in the CDI or the social responsibility of the honor code, that is not true inclusion.”
The Supreme Court voted for a full stay in FDA v. Alliance for Hippocratic Medicine last Friday. This lawsuit will determine whether mifepristone, a Food and Drug Administration (FDA) approved drug used in the majority of abortions across the US, will remain available for use. The stay — a temporary stop in legal proceedings issued by the court — prevented a nationwide ban on the drug during continued litigation in lower courts, but it does not reflect the case’s merit. Currently, mifepristone remains available while the case is litigated in the US Court of Appeals in the Fifth Circuit. This announcement is the latest development in the battle to determine mifepristone’s legality. In November 2022, anti-abortion doctors and medical associations sued the FDA, claiming that mifepristone harmed patients and that the FDA did not have sufficient scientific evidence to support the drug’s approval in 2000. On Apr. 7, Trump-
appointed US District Court Judge Mattew Kacsmaryk in Texas suspended the pill’s use. That same day, a Washington US District Court Judge ruled in a separate case that current FDA regulations allowing the pill should remain in place. Further complicating the pills’ status, the 5th Circuit Court of Appeals partially blocked Kacsmaryk’s suspension, maintaining a ban on mifepristone sent to patients through the mail.
After the Apr. 21 stay was decided, only Supreme Court Justices Samuel Alito and Clarence Thomas publicized their dissenting opinions. Alito argued that Danco Laboratories, mifeprestone’s manufacturer, has “not shown that they are likely to suffer irreparable harm in the interim.” Because the company is not expected to lose money, he believes Danco Laboratories is able to wait until a ruling is announced. The Court has not yet disclosed the actual number of votes for the decision.
Abortion activists point out that the statute of limitations in overturning an FDA approval is six years, but mifepristone was approved 23 years ago. In an opinion piece for Politico,
Aziz Huq, law professor at the University of Chicago, criticized the Supreme Court, explaining that these recent rulings aligned with the Republican Party’s agenda. The stay, he claims, “may help bolster the court’s increasingly tenuous public credibility.” The Biden Administration also reaffirmed its support for the drug’s approval. In a statement on Friday, Biden pledged to “defend FDA’s independent, expert authority to review, approve, and regulate a wide range of prescription drugs.”
The Biden Administration and pro-choice groups across the country continue to fight to ensure abortion access. After the Supreme Court’s ruling in Dobbs v. Jackson Women’s Health Organization determined that the right to an abortion is not protected by the US Constitution and should be determined by state legislatures, the FDA allowed pharmacies to carry mifepristone by prescription. As a result, telehealth-prescribed medication abortions increased from 5% of abortions to 9%, according to the Society of Family Planning.
The Guttmacher Institute found that 53% of facility-based abortions in the US are
medication abortions. Mifepristone is a pill that is usually used in combination with misoprostol, another commonly used abortion medication. According to Emily Bazelon from the New York Times, if mifepristone is ultimately banned in the US, “people can take only misoprostol in higher doses, but this method is 88 percent effective…and is also more likely to cause side effects.” Abortion providers note that misoprostol can be used on its own in the absence of mifepristone, but medication abortions without mifepristone are more likely to result in complications.
FDA approval of mifepristone has not yet been overturned, but the 5th Circuit Court of Appeals will hear oral arguments in May. The losing side could then eventually appeal to the Supreme Court. Should FDA approval be challenged by the courts, many other medications could be victims of political — rather than medical — scrutiny. Conservative attacks on medication abortions are likely just the beginning of a long battle to maintain access to reproductive healthcare.
Davidson offers 74 majors, minors and interdisciplinary programs to students. However, there remain fields of study that have yet to be formally established, or gained their own department. Some of these programs include journalism, finance and accounting, business, and engineering. However, this has not deterred students from pursuing many of these fields of interest.
Emily Drew ‘04 is an Emmy Award-winning journalist and producer. She’s worked with VICE News and MSNBC, among other news outlets. At Davidson, she double-majored in English and Political Science.
“[Taking classes in both subjects] applied well to the kind of storytelling [i’ve] done as a journalist, Drew said. “I think literary analysis is one of the most important skills any person can have in this country right now.”
Reflecting further upon her Davidson career, Drew shared how the resources provided to her by the College aided her direct entry into the field of journalism. She received two separate grants from Davidson, one through the Lilly Foundation and the other through the Dean Rusk Foundation, which allowed
her the opportunity to study journalism internationally. Drew utilized these grants to spend a year in Taiwan post-grad to “practice journalism and study Mandarin Chinese.”
During her time in Taiwan, she was also hired to write for an English language newspaper. Following her time in Taiwan, Drew moved to New York and recieved a fully-funded grant to study journalism in Europe under the Erasmus Mundus Program, which then led into her early broadcasting career.
Another aspect of Drew’s time at Davidson that had a significant impact on her career was the nature of the community.
“Davidson [gives] young people practice in living in a small community where your reputation has consequences for your daily life,” Drew said. “And the fact is, once you get out into the world and you start working in [any field], you’ll find that the world is very small.”
She noted that this rings true especially in the field of journalism given the increased distrust in many news outlets. Drew tied Davidson’s social practices and journalistic attitudes together,explaining that “once you’ve lost [public] trust as a storyteller, it’s hard to maintain an audience; [...] readers and viewers expect some level of integrity, [...] and
if you can maintain that and have that in your personal life, it will come through in your work.”
James K. Batten Professor of Public Policy
Ike Bailey ‘95 is a decorated journalist. He was named South Carolina’s top columnist and has participated in the Nieman Fellowship at Harvard University, the most prestigious journalism fellowship in the country. At Davidson, he majored in psychology.
“[My psychology classes] built up [my] research and organizational skills, on a practicalevel, forced [me] to examine complex studies and phenomena through multiple lenses, professional and personal, which helped hone [my] ability to dispassionately deal with any issue.”
Bailey decided that he wanted to pursue journalism in his junior year.
“[I] noticed that almost all the voices in the Davidsonian discussing a potential incident of discrimination involving a black staff member at a nearby grocery store were largely alike and came to a similar conclusion.”
Bailey used his anger and passion about this issue to develop his journalistic career.
When thinking about the ways in which students can pursue fields like journalism at Davidson, where they are not offered as a
major, Bailey had advice to share.
“Write. And write some more,” he said. “And branch out in your writing. If you can land an internship, do that. If you can get “clips” [examples of published work], do that. Clips from the Davidsonian and local news outlets off campus are great. Hone your interviewing skills by practicing interviewing strangers on and off campus. Be nosey. Be curious. And write.” Further, he shared how many classes in the Communications Department lend themselves to building these skills, specifically in “research, critical thinking, and public speaking.”
Both Bailey and Drew agreed that the lack of a journalism major at Davidson never hindered them or discouraged them from pursuing it.
“I didn’t feel hampered by the lack of a journalism major.” Bailey shared. “I am a firm believer that a liberal arts foundation is a strong one for just about any industry.”
Irecently had the opportunity to attend a student journalism conference that brought together college papers from across the country. This two-day event was a classic liberal arts school affair, filled with essential career networking and insightful discussions. What I experienced during those 48 hours went beyond my expectations, and taught me so much about the field of journalism, particularly student journalism.
Hosted by the Niemann Foundation and their fellows, I was captivated by the stories I heard. Armed with pen and paper, I eagerly scribbled down notes as I chatted with both fellows and student-run college papers.
From covering school shootings at Michigan State to rapid reporting on Columbia University’s new president, the incredible work being done by these young journalists across campuses is truly impressive. The level of professionalism and commitment displayed by my peers was honestly inspiring.
I also stumbled upon an incredibly surprising and envyinducing fact: many student journalists are actually paid for their work. Paid! It’s astonishing to think about the Editor’s in Chief of the Davidsonian, laboring over layouts late into the night, and it pains me to realize that other students elsewhere are doing the same, and getting compensated for their efforts.
Although I am aware that the Davidsonian does not boast the Harvard Crimson’s impressive 300 person staff, with our core dedicated team assigning stories, editing, laying out, getting photos, following tips deserve some kind of compensation for their work. Some student journalists may not get paid with a check in hand at the end of the month but instead their schools reward them with a stipend. Some papers make the distinction between editorial staff getting paid with writers not, providing greater incentive to stay on at the paper and work their way up
Below are some perspectives about the Deliberative Citizenship Initiative (DCI) from several students who currently serve as DCI fellows and facilitators. These students wish to respond to the viewpoint provided by the anonymous article writer on March 29, 2023, and in general value feedback about the work of the DCI.
Clyde Dwyer
I invite the author to genuinely advise on how to improve the DCI. The article deflects by simply stating that “the issue is foundational,” and that nothing can be done to change this. Davidson College and the United States of America were both built on foundations of slavery and oppression––yet every day, many people strive to build a greater and more promising future for these institutions. What point is there in attending Davidson, or being an American, if not to strive for progress and improvement?
Progress and improvement are necessary goals but not universally agreed upon––which is where the value of deliberation and disagreement comes in. The DCI strives to create a productive and welcoming space for these disagreements to occur. At times we could have done better–– like last semester, when the DCI invited a speaker who I believe held transphobic views. While it is necessary to engage with people we disagree with, we must do this in a way where everyone’s voice is heard and their identity is respected. We welcome suggestions on how to do this, as a safe and dynamic space for deliberation is necessary. Without it, people will only feel comfortable strongly disagreeing through anonymous articles or yik yaks, which is an unproductive way to engage with one another.
LJ Phillips
Being a DCI Fellow has been truly a blessing for me this year. It has given me the opportunity to talk to others that I might not have talked to in any other circumstance about issues that intrigue me. The DCI has helped me become a better leader and communicator. I believe the DCI brings
through the ranks.
I understand the Davidsonian may not have the impressive 300-person staff of the Harvard Crimson, our dedicated team of core members who assign stories, edit, layout, gather photos, and follow tips truly deserve some form of compensation for their hard work. Some student journalists may receive a stipend reward from their school instead of the classic paycheck at the end of the month. In fact, some papers differentiate between editorial staff who receive payment and writers who do not, which serves as a greater incentive for them to remain committed to the paper and strive to advance through the ranks.
So, with this newfound knowledge in mind, I am pleading the case that student journalists at Davidson College should get paid.
Student journalism presents a unique opportunity to engage in debates, discussions, and shine a spotlight on important stories for the campus community. It serves as a means to raise awareness about pertinent information or draw attention to significant historical events and changes that may have a profound impact on the campus community. However, while I do not have the statistical evidence to support this claim, from what I overhear individuals would rather rely on the anonymous and unverified sources on Yik Yak for information, instead of credible and fact-checked articles from the Davidsonian.
I know there is also the argument that Yik Yak is highly entertaining, but what if, the paper was paid more and then we had a specific reporter whose beat was to live blast tweets, news taglines, or notifications straight to your phone. But that requires a lot of work. Writing a Davidsonian article, if done right, should and is a lot of work. You have to interview, fact check, do background research, find a photo, write, and then lay it out. What’s more you only have a week to do it. Interviews need to be slotted in around classes and jobs. Working for our campus paper, at least for me, became a labor of love.
value on campus because it gathers people of differing views together to deliberate in a beneficial way that helps improve political and social discourse on campus. I would like those who have read the previous article and perspectives piece to truly evaluate what they have read. The DCI’s main goal is to improve our campus for the betterment of everyone at Davidson.
Toffy Chen
The mission of the DCI includes encouraging diversity in the group, and we welcome more students to join and build upon the organization. Diversity in the DCI is also represented by the diverse interests that each Fellow has. The DCI Fellows implement individual projects during the spring semester, and I am excited that each of us is pursuing varying topics, including experiences of international students (cosponsored by ISP), Davidson culture and values, reproductive welfare, and more. We hope to advocate deliberation and the necessity to hear from different perspectives. As a facilitator, the biggest responsibility is listening to the participant’s perspectives and responses to create mutual understanding. We are not here to define what is right or wrong but to provide a platform for open discussion. And just as any organization on campus, we are learning from past experiences and want to do better. In the future, we will strive for a wide range of partnerships. We welcome advice and assistance and hope that our efforts are seen.
Peyton CarterThe opportunity to be a DCI Fellow this year has been an amazing experience for me. I didn’t know much about the organization before joining, but once I was in it, there was an immediate sense of gratitude to be a part of something like the DCI. I have learned how to communicate, facilitate, and lead in situations many would shy away from. The DCI works hard to create these spaces for everyone to join in and deliberate respectfully regardless of their beliefs, which is so important in today’s society.
Brody BassettBeing a DCI Fellow has been a great experience for me this year! Trying to facilitate
I understand that Yik Yak can be entertaining, but imagine if the Davidsonian had the resources to pay reporters more and assign a dedicated beat for live-tweeting, news updates, and notifications straight to your phone. It would require a significant amount of effort and time but if they were paid they should have the time to focus on their job rather than co-curricular hobby.
Writing a Davidsonian article – when done right – is a laborintensive process. It involves interviewing, fact-checking, researching, finding visuals, writing, and laying out the article, all within a week’s deadline. Interviews have to be squeezed in between classes and jobs, and working for our campus paper, at least in my experience, became a labor of love.
If we were compensated for our work, there’s no doubt that our articles would improve. Personally, I would gladly drop one of my four jobs to work for our campus paper if I were paid. It would allow me to dedicate more time to crafting compelling stories, generating ideas, and pursuing time-sensitive stories.
With financial incentive, writers would be more inclined to stay on the staff, enabling us to expand the number of sections and stories we cover. It could also attract more submissions from fellow students who may be more motivated to contribute knowing they could be paid for their work.
Who knows, if we were paid, we might even be able to make our campus paper rank among the likes of The Maroon at Loyola University in New Orleans. And why shouldn’t we aim for that level of recognition? Maybe the Davidsonian needs to start taking ads out in its papers again, or maybe it just needs a little help from its administrators. Either way, I think we should follow in the footsteps of other student newspapers and compensate our journalists.
politically contentious conversations on campus has been a rewarding challenge.
I’ve found joy throughout the semester as students on campus and the surrounding community share ideas and perspectives.
Daniel LeeAt its core, the DCI seeks to reintroduce a sense of genuine happiness that one feels after having a productive and engaging conversation with others. We seek to overcome preconceived narratives and approach deliberations with intellectual humility and an eagerness to learn. And while some of our deliberations focus on fun and lighter topics, we find it equally necessary to provide a space to converse about controversial yet fundamentally salient topics of our day. How we go about creating that space at Davidson is a question that the DCI has talked extensively about as an organization consisting of a plurality of voices. And yes, there are areas for improvement–that is why I ask those of the Davidson community who find value in providing space for growth to join us and contribute your voice as we strive to create a stronger and more connected citizenry.
Anthony
ToumazatosA range of voices exist on campus, and it is
inevitable that certain feedback loopholes will be created: we tend to spend time with those who think similar to us. Having discussion in the open with those from various perspectives means that certain views we deem repugnant won’t fester under the surface and emerge as something far worse. It is valuable to grapple with these complex issues in an environment where one can deepen their own perspective while listening to the perspectives of others. To me, the goal of the DCI is to foster understanding in a politically polarized climate, and that does not equate to upholding one perspective over another at all.
Mae CorleyI joined the DCI to engage with people outside of my immediate group of friends and in hopes of encouraging a campus culture of learning and listening. I worry that, if Davidson students cannot find an outlet in the community to speak about important issues, separation of ideas and values will only create a greater divide on our campus. I hope other students can see the importance of reaching outside of our individual silos, and I believe that DCI creates a structured, productive environment to do so.
As the calendar turned to April, Davidson baseball began its slate of conference games after a 14-12 start to the season. The team’s middling record to that point was more likely a product of a lack of manpower than anything else, as the injury bug stretched their depth thin early on. Star catcher Michael Carico ‘24, a finalist for last season’s Buster Posey National Collegiate Catcher of the Year Award, went down with a broken wrist against Coastal Carolina at the beginning of March. Pitchers Ryan Kutz ‘23 (elbow) and Isaac Fix ‘25 (jaw) have both missed significant time as well. The list goes on, with everyday lineup fixtures and bullpen contributors alike suffering from various ailments at an alarming rate. Run-scoring has not been an issue; the ‘Cats are scoring 7.9 a game, a mark that ranks in the top fifth of Division I baseball. The only issue— they are allowing 7.8, a bottom-fourth figure that has often prevented them from putting opponents away
after building early leads. Every one of Davidson’s eight qualifying hitters has reached base at a .335 clip or better, and 3 are slugging better than .500. Ryan Wilson ‘24 has led the charge offensively, with 15 home runs, 12 doubles, and an OPS (on-base plus slugging) of 1.316, the 12th-best mark in all of Division I. He’s drawn 19 walks and been hit by 22 pitches while striking out only 16 times. Jack Cotrone ‘25 has blasted ten home runs, and Michael O’Shaughnessy ‘26 has contributed seven of his own as well.
Will Schomberg ‘23 has spearheaded the pitching staff, carrying a 3.48 earned-run average in ten starts. He’s averaging 5⅓ innings per start, giving the ‘Cats some much-needed length. Ryan Feczko ‘25, Bennett Flynn ‘23, Jacob Peaden ‘23, Brycen Champey ‘26, and Miles Jamieson ‘24 have all started games with increased workloads in the wake of the aforementioned injuries and largely risen to the occasion.
Schomberg ‘23 believes that since “the end of nonconference play the team has really started to click,” and that, “we dealt with some unfortunate injuries early in the year that
we struggled to overcome. As some of those guys have come back from injury and others have stepped up in their absence the team’s confidence and performance has returned to our preseason expectations.”
The ‘Cats won each of their first four series against Atlantic-10 foes, taking 2 of 3 from each of, UMass, Dayton, and Rhode Island while sweeping Fordham. Their 9-3 record has them positioned in second place heading into a clash with 6-6 George Washington this coming weekend. Their toughest assignments are ahead of them, though, as defending conference runner-up VCU, current first-place squad Saint Louis, and third-place Richmond all await. There is reason for optimism as the ‘Cats have rounded into form at precisely the right time, but they have their work cut out for them if they intend to advance further in the A-10 playoffs than they did a season ago.
Davidson Men’s Tennis is headed to Orlando this weekend to compete in the A-10 Men’s Tennis Championships, held at the USTA National Tennis Center in Lake Nona. After a successful season that saw the Wildcats finish 4-1 in conference play and 8-10 overall, the team received the 4 seed from the A-10 and are slated to face the number five seed, George Mason at 4:30 ET Thursday, with the winner taking on the regular season champions VCU. It has been a successful year for the squad, as their record is the best it has been since the pre-COVID era. The team went 4-1 in conference play, only dropping a 4-1 decision to
Richmond on the road. Non-conference was also a brighter spot than usual for the ‘Cats, with a 4-3 defeat to rival UNC Charlotte that was one of the closest matches between the two in years. If not for a spirited comeback from the 49ers, it would have been the team’s first victory over them in 12 years. LIU and the Citadel were other notable scalps in out of conference play, both on the road.
Much of this success has had to do with the emergence of upperclassmen William Clark ‘23 and Jerry Wang ‘24, who have become instrumental parts of the teams lineup. Clark, who has battled injuries throughout his team at Davidson, has stayed healthy the entire year and spent the majority of the time at #2 singles, where he has accumulated a 6-4 record. Wang posted the same record at #6 singles, playing more matches
this year than his first two combined and has been a key part of the end of the lineup. Every singles match counts the same in tennis, and Wang’s wins against conference opponents like Dayton and Fordham have been huge.
The ‘Cats should be favored in the contest against Mason, and if all goes well, they will face the arduous challenge of beating the Rams of VCU. They went 17-5 and undefeated in conference, and will be looking to punch their 6th ticket in a row to the NCAA tournament. However, if the ‘Cats can get some contributions across their lineup and ride the consistent play of Clark and Wang, they may be able to play spoiler this weekend.
Spring Frolics 2023 was a whirlwind of performance, activities, and weather!
On Friday night, students gathered along the Old Tennis Court Lawn for a much anticipated concert of Rico Nasty, preceded by opener Tone Stith. A professional stage had seamlessly arisen on the lawn, but it was no simple task to put on this production.
I had the opportunity to talk to Laura Bullock ‘23 (she/they) about their position as Union Board’s Concert Chair this year. The whole artist selection process is tainted with mystery, but that’s part of the appeal! They were able to give us some insight, though, into this secretive process.
Bullock explained to me a brief overview of how the process takes place. The first task is picking the actual date and venue of the concert for the upcoming year. In the past, the concert has been during Frolics weekend or another weekend in the spring, and it can take place inside or outside. The date selection needs to happen in August while they weigh the costs and weather risks. Artist selections happen in November, but the process of sending out offers and receiving confirmation lasted until February. The concert committee takes into account the student opinion survey on artists, and the committee puts together a list, which Bullock sends to the committee’s agent from Virginia Beach.
“It’s a lot more complicated than people would think,” Bullock said.
She explained that people think the committee can choose from anyone–or that they are personally emailing the artist–but the process involves a lot of back and forth between the committee’s agent and the artist’s agent.
The agent talk normally results in a list of a few artists within a certain price range and availability, and the committee then has the chance to look over that list.
Bullock pointed out that the committee “looks at a lot of live videos” because “this is not a who’s the most popular artist on Spotify contest, this is who is going to bring the best
live performance for people who don’t even listen to their music.”
Finally Bullock sits with the concert advisor and sends an offer to the final artist.
“I think I’ve gotten lucky this year with how that whole selection process worked out!”
The actual execution of the concert for Frolics weekend is bustling as well. As far as the setlist and production goes, Bullock noted, “It’s completely up to the artist,” and they will send tech information beforehand. Davidson then calls in an outside company to do staging and lighting for the show.
Once the concert gets underway, Laura remains on call.
“I do get to watch and dance for part of the show, but I have to be really aware and really ready to kick into gear if anything happens.”
They recalled a mid set rush of getting a hot drink for Rico’s voice.
“The tea that Rico drank in the middle of the concert, I had to run up to the Union and bring it back down in the golf cart!”
The pressure that comes with the responsibility of the concert committee is undercut by a feeling of achievement.
“I think there is a really big reward in just standing back, watching the audience, and seeing everyone go crazy because that was always my goal.”
Davidson students were not the only ones who enjoyed the night. Bullock ran into Rico and her makeup artist hanging out on the steps outside and relayed that “she was such a sweet person and speaking so highly of Davidson and the audience.” Rico “just felt like the audience made her feel really accepted and that it was okay that she had lost her voice.”
Laura keenly remarked, “I always think that
the artist is providing something to us and it’s cool to remember that we are also providing a special experience for that artist.”
Frolics weekend has come to a close, but students’ and artists’ memories are lasting.
Caroline Thomson ‘25 (she/her) spoke to this point.
“50 years from now, I picture taking my grandchildren on my knee and telling them bedtime stories about seeing ‘Smack a Bitch’ live. The concert was truly the highlight of Frolics. My shins are completely destroyed from being bashed against the metal barricade, and Rico blew me a kiss from onstage.”
It’s safe to say Rico Nasty left her mark on Davidson College at the Spring Concert 2023, and we have many people to thank for pulling the show together.
Cate Goodin/2026 (she/her) is an English major from McLean, VA. She can be reached for comment at cagoodin@davidson.edu
How has your art changed throughout the past four years? Have your childhood memories always been the main inspiration for your art?
This spring, the Davidson Art Galleries highlighted senior studio art majors through three individual exhibitions over the past month. The final talented artist on display was Meredith Iodice ‘23, her exhibit titled “Little One” on view April 1321. Iodice created a number of small-scale, mixed media pieces depicting little moments in time, linked by string all across the wall of the gallery. Her inspiration was her life-long love of travel. She looked at pictures taken abroad over the years to create a conversation between her present and younger self. Following is a short interview where Iodice describes her art and inspiration.
My art has changed tremendously over the past four years. My first year at Davidson was really rough for me, and I struggled to find my place. Because of this, my art was very affected too, and I had a tough time finding inspiration or motivation. COVID didn’t help either; it wasn’t really until junior year that I found my momentum in art again and painted a ton when I studied abroad in Rome. That momentum carried me into senior year, but my art-making was again turned on its head, and my professors pushed me to experiment with things I’d never even thought of before, which eventually brought me to string. Quite a range of feelings and processes in art in the
past four years! As for my inspiration, no, it really wasn’t based on my childhood until very recently. Junior year I realized that I loved creating things from reference photos, and that I had a whole stash of reference photos from my travels that I could use. I also gained access to my mom’s photos of our trips, which included younger me in them, and that’s how I bridged into exploring not only my travels but my childhood in travel as well.
What is your favorite medium to work with and why?
If you asked me my favorite medium at the beginning of the year, I would’ve said oil paint, so it’s weird that I’m finding myself with my answer now being string! But it definitely is. I can still do all of the things I enjoy doing with paint and drawing materials, but in a new and more unconventional way.
What was the process of creating an exhibit like? For example, how did you decide which pieces to include? Why did you decide to sequence them the way that you did?
The process was partly planned and partly improvised. I had drawn out some sketches of how I wanted to fill the space, and I knew that since I make such small-scale pieces I would need as many of them as possible to adequately fill the gallery. I knew I wanted two pieces of younger me and present me on either end of the wall, connected with string. Then, I just delved into connecting every piece with each other in almost a sculptural way.
What advice do you have for younger artists?
My advice for younger artists would be that you never really figure yourself out as an artist, at least I haven’t yet. There’s a lot of questioning, like “what am I doing,” “why am I doing what I’m doing,” etc. It can get pretty psychoanalytical. But find what you like to
make or a material you’re drawn to, and push yourself and your art to its breaking point. That’s when you make the most revelations and create the art that will feel the most “you” in the end.
Meredith Iodice’s artist statement and work can be viewed virtually on the Davidson Art Galleries website. In addition, the Senior Majors ‘23 Group Exhibition will be on view from April 26 through May 11 in the Visual Arts Center; stop by at any point to view the talent of our senior artists.
Caroline Ewing ‘26 (she/her) is an intended Art History and English major from Princeton, NJ. She can be reached for comment at caewing@davidson.edu.
CATE GOODIN ‘26 (SHE/HER) STAFF WRITER String design of Iodice’s exhibit. Photo by Caroline Ewing ‘26. Rico Nasty performs at the Spring Concert 2023. Photo by Emily Patterson ‘26. CAROLINE EWING ‘26 (SHE/HER) STAFF WRITER Another element of Iodice’s exhibit. Photo by Caroline Ewing ‘26. Old Tennis Court Lawn on Friday night. Photo by Katherine Marshall ‘26.6 Before, up front
9 And wife (Latin abbr.)
14 “Who ___ the Dogs Out”
15 Overdone, quaintly
16 What a losing plaintiff may become
18 Clear
21 Canadian prov.
44 Assistant Director of International Student Programs Nobles
48 HBO political satirical comedy (20122019)
50 Paddock youngster 51 Pilot Earhart 53 Covert WWII org.
Down
1 HDTV choice
2 Yodeling spot
3 Mistranscription, perhaps
4 Genesis place
5 Car battery brand
6 ___ win (go all out)
7 Nevada city in “Folsom Prison Blues”
8 Dramatic accusation
9 Satellite of Jupiter
10 Expense account listing
11 Oust, as an incumbent
12 Old Nissan compact SUV
15 Honk
17 Dawson or Dykstra
20 Expired, as a subscription
23 69-Across setting
24 “Yeah, right!”
25 “___ de France”
26 Fireplace fleck
28 Bobby of the Bears
29 U.N. working-conditions agcy.
32 Be laid up, say
33 European tongue
35 Program guide abbr.
37 Tell a whopper
Hi queer people! With the end of the semester perilously close, it’s time for our last issue of the school year. Going into summer break is a Tilt-A-Whirl of emotions, so we have put together some people and places you can look to for a reminder that you are not alone.
In Ukraine, war has seen a downturn in traditional homophobia. Ivan Honzyk, an openly gay soldier at the front, describes experiencing less homophobia since he and other LGBTQ+ soldiers have been fighting alongside their countrymen. Queer activists staking it out in Ukraine’s conservative culture note that the Russian onslaught has created more empathy between Ukrainians across previously stricter social boundaries regarding sexual orientation.
While U.S. education largely erases queerness from historical narratives, the upcoming American biographical drama Rustin is anticipated to shine light on Bayard Rustin. The little-known gay civil rights activist worked closely with Martin Luther King Jr and worked behind-the-scenes on the 1963 March on Washington. Rustin has largely been omit-
ted from history lessons due to his sexuality, and this film hopes to celebrate the true scope of Rustin’s work. Rustin is expected to be released on Netflix sometime this year.
The LGBTQ+ community in Iran has become more visible as protests arise across the country. Throughout the movement, some queer and trans young people have rebelled against the Iranian regime’s ban on same-sex intimacy by removing their hijabs and kissing each other in public. Others have been seen in the streets with LGBTQ+ flags and signs, amplifying messages such as “Queer, Life, Freedom.”
During the next academic year, the Welsh government will publish guidance for schools on how to support transgender students. This project has come in reaction to more and more students exploring their gender identities, as well as a lack of resources for teachers to support their students.
Thanks for reading this year! Next year, we want to include more queer voices on campus, so reach out to anpatel@davidson.edu or dasowinski@davidson.edu if you have a story, some news, or anything queer you want to share.
Friends, family, classmates, professors, ATs, tutors, tour guides, faculty, chaplains, presidents, and distinguished members of the board, Thank you for the opportunity of a lifetime. My career as a food critic for the Davidsonian has reached the end of its premiere 2022-2023 season. Just about 1 year ago, a naive and uncultured high school senior sat in his room to munch on some Teddy Grahams and lazily researched Davidson College’s “niche” page. The fact that Davidson was graded a B- in the “campus food” category hardly phased him. Little did I know, I would wind up making a career out of this. The world-renowned NYC farmto-table pioneer Dan Barber once said “Imagine the garden of Eden: if you’ve got everything you could ever dream of, then why become a culture of great food. But, most of the greatest cuisines of the world came out of hardship,” call it overly-dramatic, call it hyperbole. But I believe this is what we have going for us here at Davidson. Our options aren’t great, we have 1 dining hall, and it is …what it is. But through that struggle, wildcats have consistently been forced to negotiate, to drive out to Alinos for a perfect slice or to hit up Chick-Fil-A only to realize it’s a Sunday as you approach the drive-through. Yesterday was
my first frolic ever, I saw peers online at taco trucks, I saw members of Alpha Phi Alpha cheffing it up on a charcoal grill, and I saw jr mixologists perfecting the culinary art of the borg. If Davidson was perfect and had 3 dining halls with omelet bars and gelato stations, the joy of something like commons-giving would be lost in the aromas of better food. I am grateful for what Davidson has, and I am grateful for what I am forced to seek out on my own. I am grateful for the crazy pig, for Alinos, for Brickhouse, for Milkbread, The Egg, the spice corner, Famous Toastery and yes, I’m even grateful for the humble Scoopie. For the rest of my days at Davidson I vow to continue the hunt, on your behalf; to strive, to seek, to find, and not to yield. Eat well wildcats, and come autumn, I hope to dine with you all once again.
yowl.com/OneLastRide The Final[s] Issue
Party City Releases Frolics NPC Costume Complete with Tank Top, Jorts, Your Ex-Boyfriend’s Overshirt, and Borg
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Curry Documentary Revealed as Ploy By Admissions Office to Get More Applicants
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April 26, 2023
Conspiracy Theory: Davidson Fire and Campo
Created Frolics as a Way to Increase Annual Quotas
Page It Doesn’t Not Work
Mirroring the NFL Draft occurring tomorrow, Patterson Court Council has officially unveiled a new plan to replace the eating house placement form with a draft. Each eating house will be allotted a pick in each round of the draft, currently expected to run close to 50 rounds. While the previous randomized form guaranteed that both eating houses and first years didn’t get to choose their house, now the power has gone to the appointed General Managers of each eating house. The PCC proposal includes draft night, where each house will announce their picks at a podium, with excited eating house prospects in attendance waiting for their name to be called to journey onstage and receive a White Claw that they will immediately have to shotgun.
The new restructuring will eliminate the current system of coffee chats and parties that have not changed theme in two decades. Instead, the First Annual Eating House Combine will give each eating house a chance to put prospect members through the paces, allowing current members to see who has what it takes to join the house. Connor will have a 100 question multiple choice test about breast cancer, narrowing down possible members to only people who truly care about their philanthropy. There will also be a page on the test for possible members to fill out their parent’s 2022 tax return information in order to figure out who has the most money (to donate to charity of course).
Scouts for each eating house are also hard at work looking for an advantage on next year’s draft, scouring footage of high school seniors at parties to determine the next diamond in the rough. Scouring grainy cell phone footage for a star future member, a scout for Turner told us they were looking for “not a gritty kind of player, but more of a glittery kind of performer” who would fit into their Ke$ha oriented roster. The Warner E-board informed us that key highlights from footage that caught their eyes were drinking seltzers (not beer) and wearing athleisure to parties.
To maintain a competitive balance (that was notably not present in the era of the placement form) in the eating houses, PCC has announced that there will also be a salary cap and a system for trades put in place next year. In the new system, current members of eating houses can be traded for future draft picks and salary relief. Sources tell us Rusk Eating house is having major budgeting problems, and appears to be in a major salary cap crunch. In order to get back under the allowed salary number, their best option is to go into the trade route. Sources tell us that they intend to trade away veterans to Warner for future draft picks. The current strategy is to trade well known Rusk contributors to draft younger and less expensive future members. Additional cost cutting measures can be seen by their decision to remove one of their letters, losing the K and the Cow outside of their house, we can see the salary situation internally is worse.
A house not worried about potentially having to work on a low payroll is Connor. Apparently aware of these changes in advance, their placement day theme of baseball points to their new Moneyball-like savvy approach to new members. Scouring the books of local soundcloud rappers who definitely aren’t selling drugs at all, they will look for potential targets of interest that can fit their current team. On the note of baseball, it has been announced that everyone who watched a League of Their Own will immediately be placed into Turner. The notoriously big money spending team of the group, Warner has upped their operations in preparation before the drafting. Even rebranding by buying a new name in advance, they have apparently added a “Hall” to the middle of their name. They apparently claim that this has been here all along, but “Warner House Hall” sounds too redundant to have originally been accepted as the real name. Sources say they are willing to pay the most for new signings, with the cash coming from their parents’ money and the untraced lost credit cards from last year that have yet to be frozen. Let the draft begin. Warner House is on the clock.
Quiz Time! Is This Your Lowest Low or Can You Go Lower?
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All In
Students Finally Get Needed Motivation to Pull Grade Up From D+ to C with Final that is 20% of Grade
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Davidson!: “Perhaps they’ll get a penny from me when I’m 82.”
If you happened to look at the Davidson instagram, you’ll see that it’s time for the annual donate to Davidson campaign! Of course, if you were at Davidson for any of the last three years, the school will be lucky to get a quarter from the student body. Let’s look at all the reasons to donate!!!
1. Fund Davidson’s overt attempts to shut down fun. Wouldn’t it be nice if Davidson had no opportunities to drink. Well if you have paid attention over the last few years, it’s abundantly clear that Davidson wants to shut down F, any parties, and any fun on this campus. Whether it’s through random police takeovers at F, removing the dumpsters, inexplicable, inconsistent rules for Wildcat Sync or just showing an overall contempt for those that want to party. It would be unacademic to socialize, and we need to move up to that number 6 on niche. When you go to Davidson, it should be 4 years of depression and miserable conditions. Give Davidson money so they can put on a song and dance when new recruits come, and then make sure nobody hears songs or dances when they get together.
2. Steph Curry went here! Did you know that Steph Curry went here? Yeah that’s
right the professional basketball player went there to Davidson college. He came to graduate this year! Fuck yeah man! Steph Curry! Are you not starstruck! Do you remember when he came to campus and gave a speech! Remember when you got that shirt to signify you’re an NPC! Yeah basketball! Remember the screening of the 2 hour documentary about how he went here, in case you happened to forget? Steph fucking Curry!
3. Fund that “art” in Davidson. Including another sculpture that looks like it was made by giant squirrels.
4. Donating to Davidson College helps the whole town! There’s no town as idyllic as main street, and your Davidson donation puts more money in those faux-progressive pockets that deliberately live in the most expensive part of Mecklenburg county. This one isn’t even a joke, it’s just actually true! Don’t you want to fund this society that wouldn’t last a second if they didn’t have ordinances that keep their restaurants from shutting down? Yeah that Soda Shoppe is a killer restaurant and it’s only open from noon to 3 pm for all students! Also donating to Davidson ensures that cops can continue to pull people over on the most ticketed road in NC.
Istarted out Frolics on Friday morning in my biology class, where we were dissecting pigs. Like any diligent student on Frolics Friday, I was drinking in class. About 30 minutes into class I still couldn’t feel anything, so I decided I’d make my drink stronger by adding some of the alcohol we were using to sterilize surfaces and such. It tasted like shit, but boy, I definitely started feeling something. So I’m drinking and about to start dissecting this pig when suddenly I hear squealing from the other side of the lab. For a second it reminded me of having sex with my ex boyfriend, but turns out someone’s pig wasn’t totally dead yet. It jumped off the table and went running through the lab, just like how I ran through the entire KSig fraternity my freshman year. The professor obviously started chasing this pig around. The vegan girl that sits next to me and drinks out of a mason jar started rejoicing this escape like the pig was the resurrected Jesus or something. Anyways, when the professor runs by me he notices that I’ve poured alcohol into my drink and he’s all concerned for some reason? I mean I thought he knew that we’d all be drinking on Frolics Friday, he’s worked here for 10 something years. Anyways, he starts yelling at me and saying how I’m “violating lab safety standards” for drinking chemicals? Little
“Our family tree is so large and extensive there’s a Google Doc—but it’s not even real.”
—Overheard during Frolics
does he know I drink Nyquil every night to sleep. And meanwhile this pig is squealing and running around and the vegan is trying to catch it and I’m starting to feel kind of dizzy. Then the girl that got rejected from Brown starts monologuing about the ethics of testing on animals and how she “just knew you southern yokels would do something like this”. The English major to my left starts talking to me about how this reminds him of Charlotte’s Web and Babe the gallant pig but I can’t even make out a word he’s saying at this point. The pig bursts through the door and runs out the hall and everyone bolts after the teacher bolting after it. I guess this means class let out early, so I just took myself a couple extra bottles of alcohol on the way out for my pregame later that night. On my way out I passed a biology lab testing the SAE pool water, where petri dishes were full of molecules of cocaine, keystone, semen, and golf course grass clippings. At this point, I couldn’t see anything at all and I looked down at the bottle in my hand, and it turned out it was 12 M hydrochloric acid. That’s the last I remember. I woke up on Sunday in the hospital, so I didn’t even get to Frolic. So the moral of the story is, if you’re going to drink chemicals in your lab, make sure it’s not hydrochloric acid. Stick with the rubbing alcohol.
Note: The Yowl is a satirical supplement to The Davidsonian Hence, nothing in it should be taken as truth.