Lane County MOM | Feb / Mar 2023

• 15 years experience in the dental field

• birth to 16 years old

• accepting all insurances

• offering sedation dentistry

• awesome monthly prize drawings

• all new state-of-the-art dental equipment

• lobby treehouse with slide

• coffee bar

• fun, fun, fun

Treehouse Kids Dentist’s provides the highest quality pediatric dentistry in an incredibly warm, friendly, and fun environment. We are committed to giving you and your child the very best care in a welcoming and playful manner.

Dr. Erin Estep

meet the experts

Health

Healthy MOM with Megan Lewis, CNM, page 6

Say Cheese

Say Cheese with Dr. Brad Chvatal, page 7

Focus

Focus on MOM with Dr. David Hackett, page 10

Vacation

Vacation MOM with Donnita Bassinger, CTC, MCC, page 20

Beyond the Bin

Beyond the Bin with WasteWise Lane County in collaboration with Beyond Toxics, page 8

Smile

Something to Smile About with Dr. Erin Estep, page 11

Support

Support for Families with Audrey Benson, page 30

Pets

Pets are Family with Dr. Emily Kalenius, page 9

They know what they’re talking about]

Because I said so!

Published by GO Creative, LLC

263 29th Avenue SW

Albany, OR 97322

Editor-in-Chief

Managing Director

Audrey Meier DeKam audrey@mommag.com

Mid-Valley & Lane County

Business Development Manager

Linda Blair linda@mommag.com

541-231-7250

Salem Advertising

Representative

Kim Leighty kim.leighty@mommag.com

503-510-9036

Designer

Sean Carver

s.carver@oregonwebpress.com

Here’s your reminder

If you’re like me, you flip the calendar to March and are seized by a cold sweat of having kids off school for spring break. I should have planned something by now, I think to myself. I’ll definitely need more food, too, as my children and their friends consume every last calorie in the house. Not even uncooked taco shells are safe from being raided.

If you had your act together long ago and already booked something, please teach me how. The rest of us will likely be scrambling, depending on the ages of our kids and what kind of budget we have.

MOM Magazine is sustainably delivered throughout the community thanks to pedalersexpress.com

MOM MagazineTM is produced by GO Creative, LLC. © 2023

All rights reserved. Any reproduction, in whole or part, without written permission of the publisher, is prohibited. Information in the magazine is provided for general information purposes only with the understanding that none of the content constitutes professional advice.

Opinions expressed by the writers or advertisers are not necessarily the opinions of the magazine or the publisher. Inclusion in the magazine does not constitute endorsement of information, products or services.

If you have the funds, try looking for flights out of the Eugene Airport through airlines like Avelo. You can find direct flights to Burbank, which puts you right into all kinds of LA-based fun. For something closer, Portland’s Oaks Amusement Park gets shockingly overlooked by valley residents when it’s practically in our backyard. I took a pack of boys there last spring break (yes, it was last minute) and we had a blast. It has a great selection of rides and activities for all ages. Don’t do what we did, though, in typical post-winter Oregonian fashion: we forgot sunscreen and paid the price.

If keeping it low-key and local is more your vibe, try your local library. I am continually amazed at the breadth of services they offer. Did you know you can check out cake pans? Wild…and super handy.

Whatever you do for your upcoming break, consider this your reminder to plan it now. That goes for myself, too.

Audrey Meier DeKam Editor-in-Chief

If you need an induction of labor

As induction of labor has become increasingly common in the U.S, midwives tend to promote spontaneous labor and physiologic birth. Many of our patients desire to avoid an induction of labor, which is part of the reason they choose midwifery care.

At McKenzie Midwives, we educate our patients about ways to help your body prepare for labor. While more research is needed, some evidence shows that natural approaches like evening primrose oil, eating dates,

drinking raspberry leaf tea, and trying acupuncture can help your cervix ripen, meaning prepare, for labor.

However, as much as we may hope for spontaneous labor, there are times when the risks of remaining pregnant become too high and an induction is medically necessary. While this may require an adjustment of your expectations or birth plan, an induction does not have to be a negative experience! There are a lot of “horror stories” on the internet and social media about inductions, and it is impor-

tant to remember that there is still a very high likelihood of a vaginal delivery. A recent study even found that elective induction of labor decreased the risk of C-section. There are two main phases of an induction: cervical ripening and labor. Cervical ripening is when your cervix softens, thins out or effaces, and begins to dilate. Contractions with an unripe cervix are unlikely to be effective, which is why ripening is so important and improves your chances of a vaginal birth. However, it is usually the slowest part of an induction and is part of the reason it can feel like such a long process. The two primary tools for ripening are a cervical balloon, which puts mechanical pressure on the cervix to help it dilate, and a medication called misoprostol or Cytotec, which helps soften and efface the cervix.

Once your cervix is ripe enough, Pitocin is usually started through an IV to cause labor contractions. It is started at a low dose and is titrated until contractions are strong enough to dilate the cervix. There is great variation in how someone’s body responds to Pitocin; some need only a low dose to go into labor, and others need higher doses.

If you need or choose an induction, it may be helpful to revisit your birth plan to think through your priorities: for example, will your goals for labor coping change? What preferences are most important for you to communicate with your care team? Remember that it is impossible to control or predict birth, and just as with spontaneous labor, flexibility and surrendering to the process is key.

(541) 683-8490 • EugeneBraces.com

1400 Valley River Drive, 240, Eugene

1130 E. Main Street, Cottage Grove

2215 Willamette Street, Ste. B, Eugene

Paying for orthodontic care

Orthodontic care, such as braces or Invisalign, can be a significant expense for many. However, several options are available to help cover the cost of treatment.

First, check with your dental insurance provider to see if orthodontic care is covered under your plan. Many insurance plans offer coverage for orthodontic treatment, so this is a great place to start. Your orthodontic office can often help navigate this process.

Another option is to inquire with your orthodontist about financing or payment plans. Most orthodontists offer in-house financing options, which can make it easier to afford treatment. Additionally, you may consider using a health care credit card, which is specifically designed for health care expenses and can help you pay for treatment over time.

Ultimately, it’s important to talk to your orthodontist and insurance provider, and explore all available options to find the best way to pay for your treatment. By being proactive and informed, you can ensure that you receive the orthodontic care you need while minimizing financial stress.

NOW ALSO AT 2215 WILLAMETTE STREET!

Making the switch to eco-friendly cleaners

By Paige Hopkins of Beyond Toxics

The increasing popularity of a sustainable lifestyle movement has caused people to look at their own consumption and buying habits.

Following warnings from scientists, the public is catching on to the fact that many chemicals in everyday household products can harm the environment and one’s health. The challenge to interested consumers, however, can be the cost and accessibility of green products. Cheaper products are often imported from countries with few restrictions on chemicals known to cause cancer. Products posing significant health risks are more likely to be marketed to young adults, low-income families and people of color.

There is also a nexus between toxic cleaning products and climate change. The chemical industry uses fossil fuels to make many of its products and is the third-largest producer of greenhouse gasses contributing to climate change. This industry is highly energy intensive and is not always accountable to people’s health and the environment.

After doing their own research, many realize they can switch to eco-friendly cleaning products. Visit the Beyond Toxics Green Home Cleaning Campaign to learn about the risks of cleaners, as well as for information on do-it-yourself cleaning products that protect your health, planet and wallet.

In partnership with

To learn more about Beyond Toxics and the Green Home Cleaning Campaign, visit beyondtoxics.org.

pets are family

For canine patients, there’s no one-size-fits-all timing that works for all. For female and male dogs expected to be smaller than 45 pounds when full grown, surgery is recommended at 5 to 6 months of age. The goal is to spay female dogs prior to the first estrus to decrease the risk of mammary neoplasia.

For larger breed dogs, the timing is more nuanced. Because of possible orthopedic concerns, certain cancers in some breeds, males expected to be larger than 45 pounds should be sterilized when growth is complete, usually between 12 to 15 months. In female dogs expected to be larger than 45 pounds, veterinarians must weigh postponing the spay to potentially reduce risks of orthopedic disease, incontinence and some cancers associated with early sterilization, against the risk of mammary neoplasia, unwanted litters and possible other cancers if sterilized later.

Spaying and neutering remains an important tool in your pet’s health and against pet overpopulation. Veterinarians and pet parents want to make the best decision for pets, so start the conversation early at your pet’s first exam.

WILVET IS NOW OPEN IN SPRINGFIELD!

Brought to you by: Emily Kalenius, DVM

Join the Parenting Young Children Project

Paying attention to your own wellbeing is crucial to being the parent you want to be. We believe that parents are resilient and can thrive in their caregiving role when given adequate support.

Our program is designed to support parents:

• with past or current substance use;

• who are parenting a child aged 18 months to 5 years old;

• in a validating, nonjudgmental, and strengths-based way.

All parents will complete surveys and use an app designed to support healthy coping and provide parenting tips for early childhood.

Some parents will also receive free, private, one-on-one support from a parenting coach over the phone or Zoom.

Parents will be asked to complete 4 surveys over the course of a year and will receive $75 per completed survey (up to $425; more details on website).

Please contact us…We look forward to hearing from you!

Website: www.parentingyoungchildren.org

Phone: 971-219-2025

Recent research has changed some of the recommendations we make in when to spay and neuter dogs and cats. For feline patients, we continue to recommend spaying or neutering prior to sexual maturity, which is by 5 to 6 months of age.

David

A. Hackett, OD, FCOVD

Lifetime Eye Care a division of Sterling Vision 1011 Valley River Way Suite 110, Eugene 541-342-2201 or 866-4EYELUV

sterlingvision.com

Winter dryness gets in your eyes

Winter cold, dryness indoors from heaters and wood stoves, and plenty of screen time can cause discomfort for your eyes. A few ways to help:

• We blink less when using a computer screen, so use the 20/20/20 rule: take a break every 20 minutes, to look 20 feet away for 20 seconds. This helps our focusing and eye-pointing muscles avoid too much time in one posture.

• Use artificial tears such as Systane Ultra, Blink, Refresh Tears, etc. Avoid gel types during daytime, as they can be too thick to provide a clear image.

• Bruder Masks are reusable, microwaveable warm eye compresses that feel like a spa treatment. They help by getting oil glands functioning better, which improves tear film. We keep these in stock, so stop by our office to pick one up.

• Remove contact lenses nightly and replace them on schedule to reduce the risk for bacterial infection. Keeping the lens surface as smooth as possible makes vision clearer.

• It’s hard to make tears if you are dehydrated, so drink plenty of water and avoid diuretics like caffeine and alcohol.

• Consider washing your eyelids with warm water and non-irritating soap such as baby shampoo.

Keeping your eyes in good health goes a long way in feeling refreshed and ready to take on the day. Stay up-to-date with your regular eye exams, and let your eye doctor know if you’ve started or stopped any medications, as certain types can be drying.

Lane County’s premier birth center offering pregnancy, labor and delivery, postpartum, lactation, newborn, gynecology and wellness care. Certified Nurse Midwives provide a personalized evidence-based experience in a boutique setting. oregonbirthandwellness.org

Co-Directors collectively have 30 years of experience caring for birthing families

Crystal Massey, CNM, MSN

Kelly Rickman, CNM, DNP

Brought to you by:

Dr. Erin Estep is a board-certified pediatric dentist who owns Treehouse Kids Dentist in Springfield. She and her staff are committed to making sure your child has an amazing, safe, memorable dental experience.

Teething tips

Plus, what not to do

As teeth come in, babies may have sore or tender gums. To help your baby feel better, you can:

• Gently rub your baby’s gums with clean, wet gauze, or your finger, or a small, cool spoon.

• Give them a clean, chilled (not frozen) teething ring — but don’t dip it in anything sweet or in other foods.

• If your baby is still cranky and uncomfortable, talk to their dentist or pediatrician.

DO NOT use benzocaine-containing over-the-counter teething products such as Anbesol, Hurricane, Orajel, Baby Orajel and Orabase and some prescription products to soothe sore gums in young children. These products can cause serious reactions in children. Details are available on the U.S. Food and Drug Administration website at fda.gov.

treehousekidsdental.com 1611 J street Springfield, OR 541-515-6631

office@treehousekidsdental.com

Ophelia's

Amanda Dellinger

PROFESSION: Community Relations Director at SquareOne Villages

COMMUNITY: Lorane

PARTNER: Mariah Drogitis, caretaker and property manager

CHILDREN: Juniper Rose, age 3

PHOTOS BY: FREMOUW PHOTOGRAPHY

FROM HER WORK WITH SQUAREONE VILLAGES TO BUILDING HER OWN TINY HOUSE, HOME IS AT THE CENTER OF EVERYTHING FOR THIS MOM.

Family comes first.

All families are unique. Tell us about yours. My family is the best. My wife is the most wonderful, warm and generous person I’ve ever met and I love our love. Our daughter, Juniper, is kind, gentle, affectionate and filled with light and wonder. I love getting to take part in her life and witness her brilliance every day throughout the years. We also have a cat, Merlin. He is all black with little white tufts coming out of his ears.

We live in a 100-year-old farmhouse on a little 2.2 acre farm in Lorane that we purchased in 2020. Our dream for the last 10 years has been to have our own little homestead in the country. One stepping stone to this dream was to build and live in the tiny house on wheels that we built together back in 2016, my wife’s design. I like to brag that she taught me how to build as we were building it.

When did you know you wanted to be a mom?

I’ve known I wanted to be a mom since I was very little. The main toys I played with were dolls, I loved caring for them. I’ve always loved children and connect well with them. It was so hard to wait until I was 33 to have a first child. But I’m glad we did, we accomplished so much before having a little human to raise. I don’t think I would have been as present as a mother if I was still dealing with the health crises I was navigating for a very long time.

Has the pandemic changed the way you parent, beyond just the practical and logistical parts? If so, how? The pandemic has changed the way I do most things, parenting included. There was and continues to be so much loss and tragedy during this pandemic. Thankfully there have also been some blessings for us.

Being able to buy a house in July 2020 and have a home office has had a profound

impact on my life. Luckily, I can do a lot of my job from home and will go into town for work one to three times a week depending on what’s going on. I’m grateful to work in a workplace that allows this kind of arrangement in perpetuity for my position in the nonprofit.

I think the last three years have changed so many things for the better in daily life. I’m able to have lunch with my family and be available for simple little things, all during my workday. So I think it’s changed the way I parent, mostly by allowing me to just be there. There’s an emotional bond that develops, which is like nothing else. I am eternally grateful and in awe of the life I’ve built with my wife, very intentionally, for our family. It also changed the way I parent by helping me remember that everything we love can just be taken in an instant. So we have to be present and available to the ones we love.

Tell us about one of your proudest mom moments. When Juniper was about 10 months old, I was trying to get her to say “mapa” when referring to me and she said “mapop!” Now I am forever her mapop. Also, when a kid falls at Bounce gymnastics, she will go over to them and pet their head to make sure they’re okay.

What is something you swore you would never do before kids that you now do? (skip showers, go to a drive through coffee in your pjs, etc.)?

Screen time

In what way is your child like you? Juniper loves tools, large equipment (like excavators and tractors), choppin’ wood, and getting dirty, just like me. She’s kind, (mostly) gentle and bighearted.

Your biggest wish for your kid is… To find whatever it is they care deeply about and that she always remains safe, happy, and healthy.

MOM's Favorite...

Tell us about your favorite…

…binge-worthy podcast: We

Can Do Hard Things

…way to get out of making dinner: My wife usually cooks but when I do, it’s a pleasure and nothing to get out of.

…inspirational quote: It’s never too late and you’re never too old.

…parenting book or philosophy: Attachment Parenting. People generally think this is when you never put your kid down, but that isn’t accurate. Attachment parenting is about forming a secure, trusting attachment to parents during childhood and forms the basis for secure relationships and independence as adults. When my wife and I were first dating, we would often go to Barnes & Noble and find attachment parenting books to read to each other. Now we’ve expanded into gentle parenting and simplicity parenting.

No one works harder than mom.

We know that being a mom is a full-time job. How do you balance (or not) motherhood, activities, work, volunteering, household responsibilities, and life in general? What sometimes falls through the cracks? Being very selective of what I commit myself to. It can be helpful to engage Juniper in some of our household chores, but also sometimes more stressful. Something that’s really helped our family is giving each other alone time. Especially when things are starting to feel overwhelming.

Tell us about your work or volunteerism outside of the home. I’m the Community Relations Director for SquareOne Villages. I lead our fundraising efforts, production and management of events, PR and marketing. We are a 501c3 nonprofit low-income housing developer that also builds shelters for people who are unhoused.

I take a lot of pride in what I do professionally. I love connecting with our incredible donor base and sharing our mission to create democratic communities with homes that are permanently affordable

and environmentally sustainable. I love setting big goals and working at a place where we can blow our stretch goals out of the water. Not just for the sake of it, but for the sake of making a big difference in people’s lives who are unhoused or housing vulnerable.

I love working with brilliant people who think beyond any box you can possibly imagine and then helping bring the money in to make it happen. The relationships with foundations and donors that I’ve formed are one of my absolute favorite things about my role. There’s so much opportunity in this work.

When was the last time you failed? What did you learn? When I was installing beautiful cedar on the ceiling of the tiny house and nicked my right pointer finger on the table saw, shredding my finger and taking off some of the bone. I learned that no matter how confident I am, to use all the safety precautions.

Do you have a goal you’d like to accomplish within the next five years? Build a family home with my wife.

Tell us about your upbringing. How did it shape the mother you are today? I’m grateful that I got to witness my mother and grandmother caring for their families. I’m grateful for their stories and deep love. Everything wasn’t “perfect,” if that’s even possible, but I had so much love, care, privilege and opportunity. They helped me learn how to be the kind of mother I want to be.

What is special about where you grew up? I grew up in the suburbs of Denver, on a cul-de-sac with tons of neighbors with kids. We would often get together and play kick-the-can, kickball, capture the flag, basketball, midnight ghost in the graveyard, or just ride bikes together. It was very special.

What do you think is the most important life skill or value your parents taught you? They always taught me to pursue what I care about. That what I want matters. That I have something to say and something to contribute. It wasn’t until more recently that I under-

stood what a gift this was. It hasn’t been that long since women and girls weren’t allowed to pursue their own interests in the United States. In some countries, it is still that way.

What is something you will NEVER do again? Go to a cove beach. A sneaker wave took all three of us on December 13, 2021 and we could have lost our lives if several of our friends weren’t there to help us out of the water.

Which good habit do you wish you started earlier? Taking alone time.

What are three words your best friend would use to describe you? Loving, sensitive and curious (I asked).

What is the quality you like most about yourself? I like that I am kind and that I care deeply. If you could instantly have one new skill (i.e. foreign language, musical talent, eyes in the back of your head, etc.), what would it be? I would learn how to weld.

What’s your superpower? Feeling other people’s emotions. Sometimes it’s helpful and a blessing, sometimes it’s a curse.

MOMs Love Local

We love locally owned businesses, restaurants, places and organizations. Share your favorite…

…shop to pick up a gift for friend: Down to Earth Home, Garden and Gift

…coffee spots: Meraki Coffee, Community Cup Coffee

…view or scenic lookout: Sweet Creek Falls

…restaurant to take the kid: Evergreen Indian

…restaurants for a date night: King Estate

…take-out, food truck or quick bite: Royal India, Chaio Thai Food Truck

…any other local places you love: Eugene Library, Alton Baker Park, Owen Rose Garden

If mom’s not happy, nobody’s happy.

It’s Saturday afternoon and you suddenly find yourself at home alone for a few hours (we know, it never happens). What do you do? Just hang out by myself and enjoy the silence.

What keeps you up at night? Knowing how many unhoused people are living unsheltered every night, in all weather.

What is your least/most favorite household chore? I don’t have a favorite or least favorite, they all just gotta get done! My wife and I do a good job of sharing household tasks. It makes my wife happy when I do dishes so I enjoy doing them.

What’s your guilty pleasure? (dark chocolate hidden in the pantry, TJ Maxx, daily latte habit?) Dark chocolate with almonds and sea salt from the freezer.

They say that everyone has a book in them. What’s the title of your book? Finding True North

Listen to mom.

Is motherhood what you expected? What surprised you the most? I didn’t expect how hard it would be to make friends (both for Juniper and us). No longer being able to do whatever I want whenever I want. Like sleeping in or staying out late, going out on dates with my wife or randomly deciding to do something and just doing it.

Who and what has influenced the mother you are today? My wife, friends who are parents, my mother and grandmother.

What’s the best advice you’ve received from another mom? Actively work on letting go of guilt.

What advice would you give your younger mom self? What do you wish you knew then that you know now? My advice to myself Nov. 1, 2019: You are doing great, this is just hard and will take time to adjust. You and your wife are strong and capable.

What message would you like to share with other moms? Remember to tell it like it is. You’re doing better than you think.

WHY YOU NEED TRAVEL INSURANCE

BY DONNITA CAGLE BASSINGER, CTC, MCC

As the travel industry starts to return to “normal” after a difficult few years, the costs of vacations are up and disruptions seem to have escalated. Most of the world is still understaffed and problems such as weather delays, construction issues and mechanical difficulties can interfere with travel plans.

The flight cancellations caused by weather issues over this past holiday season forced many travelers to delay travel for up to a week as they missed prepaid vacations, cruises and tours. The airlines do not reimburse customers for non-airline travel costs. They may cover the cost of a few meals or an airport hotel but that is only in unusual cases.

Vacation packages can range from a few thousand to tens of thousand dollars, and all of that can be lost if you can’t make it to your destination. When hotels and cruise lines say “non-refundable,” they mean exactly that and do not budge.

There are different types of coverage to consider when looking at travel insurance policies, but these are the most important:

TRIP CANCELLATION OR INTERRUPTION

This is usually the most important component of coverage, and prices are based on the total trip cost, length of stay and age of guests. Most travel arrangements carry hefty fees or are completely non-refundable in the case of cancellation. Trip cancellation coverage can reimburse for non-refundable fees if you cancel for specific covered reasons. Some policies allow you to cancel for any reason and receive a refund or a credit for future travel.

Trip interruption coverage applies when you are forced to return home before your scheduled return

date due to certain circumstances. If you change plans for covered reasons, you may get reimbursed for the unused portion of your trip and the additional costs incurred to travel home.

MEDICAL COVERAGES

When traveling out of the U.S., most health insurance policies do not provide any coverage. It is imperative to make sure that you are covered for any medical issues that may arise during your vacation. The amount of coverage can range from $10,000 to $100,000 per person depending on the policy you choose.

Many hospitals abroad require prepayment of the estimated costs before they will admit you if you cannot provide proof of coverage. Emergency evacuation coverage can also be included, with coverages varying from $150,000 to $1,000,000. This is important to have when traveling by cruise ship as a medical emergency at sea could require evacuation via helicopter to the nearest hospital. It can also be needed to transport you from a remote location to a high-quality hospital, or from overseas back to your home.

Travel insurance policies may also include coverage for baggage loss or delay, concierge travel services and other features. It is usually better to purchase a comprehensive policy that covers your entire trip as opposed to multiple policies that cover only flights or only a cruise.

A professional travel agent has access to different policies and can help you choose the best option for your needs. A quality insurance company has trained staff available 24 hours a day that can assist you in an emergency. They can help you rebook flights and hotels, contact an English speaking doctor or attorney, find a qualified hospital and arrange for emergency evacuation flights.

Having the right travel insurance can ease your mind and let you relax and enjoy your well-deserved vacation.

Vacation MOM is brought to you in partnership with Eugene Airport MEET

TM

Donnita Bassinger has been a travel agent for three decades, and she enjoys sending families on vacations around the world. She is mom to three boys and lives in Eugene with her husband. Tropical vacations are her specialty and she would love to help you plan a great vacation. Contact Donnita at 541-913-5272 @VacationMOMpage

When hotels and cruise lines say ‘non-refundable,’ they mean exactly that.

“ “

Being the change

reading lists for anti-RACISM and social justice

What does it mean to “do the work,” when it comes to antiracism? At its core, it’s education, which can come from reading that expands our worlds, and in turn, ourselves.

By guest contributor April Spisak, Head of Youth Services, Albany Public Library

Hey You: An Empowering Celebration of Growing Up Black

by Dapo Adeola,

2021

Joyful and lush, this picture book is a double treat with a collaboration of Black artists whose individual illustrations are seamlessly combined with inspiring text to make a creative and thoughtful whole.

Teens

The Power Book: What is it, Who has it, and Why?

Stamped (for Kids): Racism, Antiracism, and You

Who Are Your People?

by Baraki Sellers, Illustrator

Kid Activists: True Tales of Childhood from Champions of Change

An Indigenous Peoples’ History of the United States for Young People

By Roxanne Dunbar-Ortiz, Adapted by Jean Mendoza and Debbie Reese, 2019

In this impeccable, awardwinning adaptation, the groundwork of history serves as a base upon which teens can begin to build their own concepts for who they want to be in the world, with tools to put those dreams into action.

by

Claire Saunders, with Georgia Amson-Bradshaw, Minna Salami, et al., 2019

In order to manage and use your own power effectively, kids must first understand what gives them their power, whether from privilege or hardfought activism (or both), and then turn all of that into ways to make the world better.

This Book Is Anti-Racist: 20 Lessons on How to Wake Up, Take Action, and Do The Work

By Tiffany Jewell, Illustrator

Aurelia Durand, 2020

From the vivid cover to the abundance of actionable advice throughout, this gem of a guidebook is intended to spark introspection that can then be a catalyst for change; diarists will appreciate the partner journal with 50 prompts to reinforce the core text.

by

Jason Reynolds and Ibram X. Kendi, Adapted by Sonja Cherry-Paul, 2021

Although this has been adapted for a younger audience, the text retains the sharpness and fearlessness of the original: kids can work to understand and stamp out their own racist thoughts and gain tools to impact those around them.

Reggie Brown, 2022

This extraordinary and affirming picture book helps children understand how their ancestral roots — the people and places they come from — are threads woven into the tapestry of who they are in the world.

How I Resist: Activism and Hope for a New Generation

by Maureen Johnson (Editor), 2018

This collection of essays, stories, poems and comics can be read in any order — teens are directly encouraged to find that which inspires them, helping them to create their own aspirational goals while acknowledging where the world stands now.

The Black Friend: On Being a Better White Person

Better than We Found It: Conversations to Help Save the World by Frederick Joseph, 2020, 2022

Frederick Joseph is an electric author whose writing is suffused with energy, passion and a resounding belief that teens can absolutely change the world

by

Robin Stevenson, Illustrator Allison Steinfeld, 2019

Part of the fantastic Kid Legends series, this book celebrates activists as children, adding humanity, vulnerability and personal details that make exalted historical individuals far more accessible to a young audience.

Our Stories, Our Voices: 21 YA Authors Get Real About Injustice, Empowerment, and Growing Up Female in America

by Amy Reed, with Julie Murphy, Sandhya Menon, et.al., 2020

In this elegant and engrossing collection of essays, authors explore race, ethnicity, religion and gender in personal ways, creating points of accessibility for teens likely living through similar experiences.

Adults

White Fragility: Why It’s so Hard for White People to Talk about Racism

by Robin Diangelo, 2018

This thoughtful book begins with examining white defensive responses to race and racism before moving into action: ways that white people can work to engage in more meaningful, constructive conversations about race.

White Women: Everything You Already Know about Your Racism and How to Do Better

by Regina Jackson and Saira Rao, 2022

This fearless guidebook first analyzes nine aspects of traditional white woman behavior before challenging the reader to consider where their own actions fit within those structures, and how to leave tradition behind.

How to be an Antiracist

by Ibram X. Kendi, 2019 Kendi uses history, science, personal experiences and his impeccable writing skill to present a treatise on moving from racist to actively anti-racist, and how this work can transform a person and, ultimately, society.

So You Want to Talk About Race

by Ijeoma Oluo, 2019

Want practical advice about how to talk to a coworker or family member about racism? Oluo offers both an actionable guide to initiating conversations along with an intricate history of this country’s racist heritage.

Me and White Supremacy: Combat Racism, Change the World, and Become a Good Ancestor

by Layla F. Saad, 2020

This visionary, inspiring workbook will help readers understand their own biases and begin to dismantle them, all within a structured weekly series of readings, thought exercises and potential discussions.

Cummings, MSN, CNM

Downing-Moore, MSN, CNM

HOT TAKES ON

NON-BIRTHDAY CAKES

Just when you thought your offspring couldn’t be more surprising, they’ll spring something wild on you, such as this: they do not like cake. You may ask yourself: How? Why? Where did I go so wrong?

All jokes aside, we know there are people who do not want their cake and eat it, too. It can be for a variety of reasons, ranging from the texture to food allergies, or maybe just wanting something different.

Try these easy DIY takes on non-birthday cakes to make for festive celebrations.

NO CAKE FORM? NO PROBLEM. TRY YOUR LOCAL LIBRARY!

Through what’s called a “library of things” you can check out fun cake pans from your local library. It’s a great way to try them, without the expense or clutter of keeping them in your home.

The Eugene Library offers a selection, with finds like a Backyard Bugs Muffin Pan. The Salem Public Library also has a wealth of offerings, from a crown to a castle, or characters such as Lightning McQueen and Elmo. At the Corvallis Library, round spring form pans are available to try your hand at a cheesecake.

RICE CRISPY TREAT CAKES

No baking needed, but you’ll still have to dirty some dishes. Using simple cake forms makes these a cinch.

A tiny drop of food coloring goes a long way, too. Use shades of green to make a Minecraft version, or go wild with a rainbow of colors.

DRESSED UP DONUTS

Kids under about age 10 are usually easily delighted by something as silly as googly eyes on their favorite filled donuts.

An easy way to make donuts festive is to arrange them in a tower formation. Pick up a few dozen from your local bakery, then arrange in a stack-and stagger method. Using a cake stand helps elevate (literally) the look.

A BOX OF BROWNIES GOES A LONG WAY

Bake, cool and cut into squares. Arrange as a tower, and ta da! Put them in the

back of a lined dump truck toy, sprinkle with powdered sugar and you’ll have one happy toddler.

CANDY CAKE

Eyes will pop wide open at the sight of a colorful candy cake. Cardboard scraps or boxes can be used to create the forms, and a hot glue gun or double-sided tape works for adhering the wrapped candy. Fill in empty areas with colorful shredded paper, and add ribbons for flourish. Bonus on this one: it can be made well in advance…as long as you keep it in a good hiding spot.

LET THEM EAT…PIE

This is a popular birthday request in our house. It has a tangy flavor from the rhubarb that my husband and kids agree isn’t overboard in sweetness.

— AMD

Grandma DeKam’s Rhubarb Custard Pie

3 eggs, slightly beaten

2 ⅔ Tablespoon milk

1 ¾ - 2 cups sugar

4 Tablespoons flour

¾ teaspoon nutmeg

4 cups chopped rhubarb

2 9-inch pie crusts

In a large bowl, add the milk to the slightly beaten eggs.

In a separate bowl, stir together sugar, flour and nutmeg. Then add this dry mixture to the milk and eggs.

Add in the rhubarb and let the mixture sit for about 10 minutes to dissolve the sugar.

Pour into a 9-inch pie crust then cover with the additional pie crust; get as fancy as you wish with the top.

Bake at 400 degrees for 40 minutes, then cover the edges with foil. Bake for 10 to 20 minutes more until set.

Unpaid labor

Chore wars

When cohabitating adults need to keep their household running, there is bound to be strife.

According to a long-term study funded through the National Science Foundation, husbands create an extra seven hours a week of housework for wives, while wives save husbands from about an hour of housework a week.

In same-sex households, chores are more equitable. A New York Times article found, “Dozens of studies of gay and lesbian couples have found that they divide unpaid labor in a more egalitarian way. They don’t have traditional gender roles to fall back on, and they tend to be more committed to equality.”

For male-female couples, though, there is room for growth. The good news is that things have improved since 1996. The bad news: a recent Gallup poll found that the division of labor in these households remains tethered to traditional stereotypes, with both men and women saying they each do more than their partner.

Problems

Change the language

“How can I help?”

If there’s a phrase that will detonate an explosive argument, it’s this one. When there’s an imbalance in who is doing the necessary work, the lesser contributing partner will say, How can I help? To the person doing the lion’s share of household labor, it grates because a fully grown adult should already see what needs to be done — and just take care of it.

Don’t ask for an award

And the Oscar goes to… ...Your partner who feels the need to announce every chore they just did in an attempt to garner praise for it. For a menial task, that simply needs to be done. When both of you live there. Give them a Lifetime Achievement Award for Doing a Thing, in the hopes you never hear about it again.

Solutions

Hire a pro

Many couples will tell you that a professional housekeeper is a marriage saver, and that the cost is well worth it. “I’ll collect cans to pay for it, if it comes to that,” says one super-clean parent we talked with, who happily pays for a twice-monthly home cleaning service. In fact, according to a 2019 survey by Yelp, 62% of couples who have outsourced chores say it helped their relationship.

What we fight over the most

1. Washing the dishes and cleaning the kitchen.

2. Doing laundry.

A game to make it equitable

The Fair Play Deck: A Couple’s Conversation Deck for Prioritizing What’s Important

Here’s one for date night: a card game aimed at examining who is doing what to keep the household in order. Created by author Eve Rodsky, the deck contains 100 household tasks to shed light on invisible chores, in the hopes of improving the balance of home labor.

3. Cleaning the bathroom.

4. Sweeping and vacuuming.

5. Cooking meals and grocery shopping.

Source: Modern Love and Household Responsibilities, Yelp Survey, 2019

Before kids, your house was likely remarkably cleaner. Enter a child, and everything gets messier, including which adult is responsible for what.

Audrey Benson Behavior Supervisor

922 NW Circle Blvd, Ste 160-112 Corvallis, OR 97330

kidsnw.org | 1.888.360.0360

THE BEAUTY OF NATURE FOR calming minds

Nature has been proven to positively impact mental health while promoting calmness and creativity. Spending some time outside with the kiddos helps everyone disconnect from the bustle of life, and reconnect with what’s important.

In the Willamette Valley, we’re fortunate to have stunning natural beauty all around us. No need to wait for a sunny day in Oregon — the clouds and winter mist bring their own special beauty. Bundle up and try this simple mindfulness exercise with your kids, that we call Nature Sit Spots:

1. Grab paper, pens or pencils and take your little ones outside to a quiet, safe spot to sit. “Nature” can be deep in the woods, your yard or a local park. Don’t overthink it!

2. If you have more than one child, ask that they sit far away from each other so as to not distract those around them.

3 . This is too easy: Whisper your directions to set the tone for this activity. Ask them to sit quietly with their pen and paper. They can draw what they see around them, journal, pick at the grass, etc. The only rule is they must be quiet and stay in their Sit Spot.

4 . Continue this activity for as long as your kiddo can remain quiet and focused. We may notice that our children find it difficult to sit in one spot for more than a few minutes. That’s okay! Help them focus by pointing out something in nature for them to draw, hold, smell, etc. If the struggle is too real, be flexible and end the activity. The next time you try, they’ll likely be able to engage longer.

5 . Watch the magic, take cleansing breaths and enjoy the moment for yourself, too.

Brought to you by:

KIDS NW connects families with compassionate caregivers, specially trained in serving individuals with disabilities.

“You should sit in nature for 20 minutes a day… unless you are busy, then you should sit for an hour.”

— Zen Proverb

KIDS NW has proudly served the Intellectual/Developmental Disabilities (I/DD) community in greater Oregon since 2019.

We specialize in providing high quality, reliable support to the families we serve. Our Caregivers receive professional level, advanced skills training, backed by our highly qualified behavioral support team.

To start services with KIDS NW, visit www.kidsnw.org/families

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ADVANCED CAREGIVERS

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1-888-360-0360 922 NW Circle Blvd., Ste. 160-112 Corvallis, Oregon 97330

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