Lane County MOM | April / May 2023

COVER MOM

JENNA TILLEY

SO YOU WANT TO WRITE A BOOK… LUNCH BOX BLUES? IDEAS TO GET YOU TO SUMMER

Heart of the Valley Home and Garden Show

April 28-30

Linn County Expo Center

Friday, 11-7

Saturday, 10-6

Sunday, 10-3

meet the experts

more than pregnancy care

CARE—CONTRACEPTION WOMEN LACTATION SERVICES PROBLEM

Health

Smile

Healthy MOM with Kanya DelPozzo, MSN, CNM, page 6

KANYA DELPOZZO, MSN, CNM, IBCLC EMILY DOWNING-MOORE, MSN, CNM

ANNE ZIEMBA, MSN, CNM

Beyond the Bin with WasteWise Lane County in collaboration with Realtor Carolyn Stepp, page 7

Something to Smile About with Dr. Erin Estep, page 10

Kanya Delpozzo, Dana Cummings, MSN, CNM

Emily Downing-Moore, MSN, CNM

ANNIE SNYDER, DNP, CNM

DANA CUMMINGS, MSN, CNM

Support

Support for Families with Audrey Benson, page 18

Pets

Pets are Family with Dr. Emily Kalenius, page 8

Say Cheese

Say Cheese with Dr. Brad Chvatal, page 30

Vacation

Vacation MOM with Donnita Bassinger, CTC, MCC, page 20

Focus

Focus on MOM with Dr. David Hackett, page 9

[They know what they’re talking about]

Published by GO Creative, LLC

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Albany, OR 97322

Editor-in-Chief

Managing Director

Audrey Meier DeKam audrey@mommag.com

Mid-Valley & Lane County

Business Development Manager

Linda Blair linda@mommag.com

541-231-7250

Salem Advertising

Representative

Kim Leighty kim.leighty@mommag.com

503-510-9036

Designer

Sean Carver

s.carver@oregonwebpress.com

Because I said so!

MOM Magazine is sustainably delivered throughout the community thanks to pedalersexpress.com

MOM MagazineTM is produced by GO Creative, LLC. © 2023

All rights reserved. Any reproduction, in whole or part, without written permission of the publisher, is prohibited. Information in the magazine is provided for general information purposes only with the understanding that none of the content constitutes professional advice.

Opinions expressed by the writers or advertisers are not necessarily the opinions of the magazine or the publisher. Inclusion in the magazine does not constitute endorsement of information, products or services.

For decades in my writing career, the phrase “grow a thicker skin” has been bandied about as the only way to protect yourself from the soul-crushing rejections of a tough industry. One must go through these rites of initiation, I was told time and again, to become a real writer. Take your licks. Get knocked about by the industry until you’re as hardened as an armadillo.

In my 20s and 30s, I drank the Kool-aid of this maxim, constantly berating myself to toughen up, not take it so personally, let all of it roll off my back… But there’s a big fat flaw inherent in this that didn’t gel in my mind until my mid-40s, and it came up while working on this issue’s article, “So you want to write a book.” The ideology of “it was rough for me, so it should be rough for you too” has unpleasant notes of damaging, bro-built culture. It all smacks of hazing.

And it’s rampant in many many industries, not just creative ones. For decades in physician training, working 100+ hour weeks was the gauntlet new doctors had to run, all while maintaining an unemotional mask. This was terrible for patients, workers and basically everyone. No one wants an exhausted robot doctor.

I’ve been called sensitive all my life and made to feel less than for it. But here’s the thing: it’s my super power. My thin skin is exactly what allows me to understand the motivation of a person or character. Why should I feel less when my very business as a writer is to feel and then translate those feelings into words and stories? It’s the very essence of authenticity. In fact, that authenticity is good for all occupations, if you ask me. It’s called humanity.

The ones who buy into the tear-you-down first, then build-yourself-upagain mentality? Hurt people hurt people. Teach your kids to reject it. Even Elsa gave up on the conceal-don’t-feel bit.

If you’re like me, you do not need a thicker skin. What we do need is to stop feeding the outdated, harmful psychology of that phrase. Keep your thin skin. It’s perfect.

Audrey Meier DeKam Editor-in-Chief

You don’t need a thicker skin

Tips for partners when preparing for childbirth

Childbirth is a huge, life-changing event for families. Preparation often focuses on preparing the birthing parent for labor and birth. This can leave partners wondering about what their role will look like. How can they be supportive and an effective birth partner?

Labor can be intense; it’s called labor for a reason! For a partner, it can also be hard to see your loved one in physical pain, and it can be even scarier if you weren’t expecting it. Taking childbirth education classes can help partners gain insight on what to expect, what’s normal and how they can help. For instance, the Bradley method is

designed with partners in mind and focuses on using teamwork to get through labor.

Having a doula is also a great step in preparing partners for childbirth. A good doula has seen it all before and can guide both the laboring person and the partner through the process.

Midwives also practice informed choice and explain what is happening throughout labor so both the laboring person and their partner feel respected and heard.

In the postpartum period, the birthing person will most likely be busy feeding the baby. Sometimes this task can get divided up amongst the family, but in

Offering more than pregnancy care

CNM

Lactation

the case of exclusive breastfeeding, a lot of the work falls on the chestfeeding parent. When this is the case, partners have the opportunity to get really good at cleaning the kitchen or helping around the house in ways they may not be used to.

Much of the work of bringing a new life into this world falls on the laboring person, but behind every laboring person there should be a team of support people. Partners play a key role in the process and can prepare by knowing what to expect, managing house chores, sharing baby responsibilities and gathering a team of other support people.

Paint does wonders for your home

Painting can be one of the easiest ways to fall in love with your home again. Simple enhancements such as painting a front door, outdated vanity or kitchen cabinets can transform your space and mood.

However, the next time you decide to paint, consider its potential environmental effects. Paint can introduce toxic waste into landfills and release air pollutants that cause harm to humans and ecosystems. Fortunately, there are options to reduce these environmental impacts.

At SmartLiving Real Estate, our go-to is MetroPaint, a 100% recycled latex paint available at BRING, a local store, for only $13 a gallon. Purchasing MetroPaint saves landfill space, conserves water and energy, and supports a local nonprofit doing good for our planet by turning waste into paint.

It’s always wise to choose paint with low volatile organic compounds (VOC) to reduce air pollutants. You can purchase various low- and zero-VOC paints at home improvement stores.

When working on a project, it’s best to use all the paint you buy to keep it from going into landfills. If you have leftovers, combine the same types of paint to extend its useful life.

So, what colors will rule in 2023? Trend forecasters predict earthy rainbow colors like forest green, eggplant purple, and deep ocean blue — a return to more dramatic shades. Happy sustainable painting!

pets are family

Spring clean your pet items

Keep your pet safe and healthy by cleaning their bowls, toys, accessories and other supplies. Get rid of old, expired medications. After medications expire, they are no longer as effective. They could also do more harm than good to your beloved family pet.

Inspect toys for damage. If there’s a squeaker part that you can see, it is a hazard to your pet. Any visible rips or shredded fabric can end up down the stomach of your pet; prevent this by actively getting rid of toys that are beyond repair.

Most fabric toys can be machine washed and dried. The same often goes for collars, harnesses and leashes. Don’t forget to wipe down the toy bin, and hand wash hard rubber and plastic items like Kongs.

Clean food and water bowls. Pet owners know that clear slippery funk that seems to accumulate on pets’ bowls. Clean with warm soapy water until the film is gone, and be sure to rinse thoroughly. We prefer stainless steel over plastic or ceramic bowls, as steel is more durable and less likely to cause “kitty acne” (yes, that is a real thing). If you feel comfortable doing so, run your pets’ bowls through your dishwasher.

Ditch bedding that is ripped or stained . A distressed pet with a penchant for fabric is not a good candidate for a super fluffy bed. Stained bedding can be confusing if your pet suffers from any type of incontinence.

Brushes and combs need a good cleaning, too. Remove all visible fur, and soak in warm water with a dash of liquid soap. Rinse, shake off excess water and let air dry.

Brought to you by: Emily Kalenius, DVM

WILVET IS NOW OPEN IN SPRINGFIELD!

Put me in, coach!

SPORTS VISION TRAINING CAN BE A GAME-CHANGER FOR ATHLETES

Athletes need to make split-second decisions, have quick responses and see the game better than their opponent. This is where sport vision training can be useful, for help with:

Eye tracking and focusing: moving the eyes precisely, clearing the target

Eye teaming: right and left eyes performing equally and together

Anticipation timing: using vision to decide how and when to enact our muscles

Visual attention: process what is important and tune out the rest

Depth perception: understanding exactly where the ball is in 3-D space

Dynamic visual acuity: seeing moving targets clearly

Eye-hand coordination: (or eye-foot coordination) matching our body to the game, and the world around us

Peripheral awareness: field awareness, capturing the scene without looking directly at each detail

Visual reaction time: the time between seeing and deciding what action to take

To learn more, visit the International Sports Vision Association’s website at sportsvision. pro. And be sure your athlete has a comprehensive eye exam. Note that contact lenses are preferred for athletes and can be fit at any age, typically starting around age 12.

Why kids need dental visits every six months

Regular dental checkups every six months are important for children because they help to prevent dental problems from developing or worsening. Here’s why:

Early detection: Regular dental checkups help detect problems early, such as cavities, gum disease, and other oral health issues. When caught early, dental issues are generally easier and less expensive to treat.

Preventive care: Routine dental cleanings and fluoride treatments can help prevent tooth decay and cavities. A dentist can also provide advice on good oral hygiene practices to help maintain healthy teeth and gums.

Monitoring growth and development: As children grow, their teeth and jaws develop, and regular dental checkups allow the dentist to monitor this growth and development. Early detection of any potential issues can help prevent more serious problems from developing later on.

Establishing good habits: Regular dental checkups can help children establish good habits, such as brushing and flossing regularly, and avoiding sugary or acidic foods and drinks that can harm their teeth.

This is why we recommend children visit the dentist twice a year, or more frequently based on their individual needs. We want those smiles to last a lifetime.

Brought to you by:

Dr. Erin Estep is a board-certified pediatric dentist who owns Treehouse Kids Dentist in Springfield. She and her staff are committed to making sure your child has an amazing, safe, memorable dental experience.

treehousekidsdental.com

1611 J street Springfield, OR 541-515-6631

office@treehousekidsdental.com

Lane County’s premier birth center offering pregnancy, labor and delivery, postpartum, lactation, newborn, gynecology and wellness care. Certified Nurse Midwives provide a personalized evidence-based experience in a boutique setting.

oregonbirthandwellness.org

541-515-6556

890 Beltline Road in Springfield

Note

Crystal Massey, CNM, MSN

Co-Directors collectively have 30 years of experience caring for birthing families

Kelly Rickman, CNM, DNP

Jenna Tilley

PROFESSION: Volunteer assistant farm manager, board secretary and instructor at Parker Learning Gardens; seamstress and farm-sitter

COMMUNITY: Coburg/North Eugene

PARTNER: Nathan Tilley, farm manager, director and instructor at Parker Learning Gardens

CHILDREN: Stepdaughter Maya, age 13, and son Ronan, age 1

PHOTOS BY: FREMOUW PHOTOGRAPHY

Family comes first.

All families are unique. Tell us about yours. My husband and I worked at Agrarian Ales, a family-friendly farmhouse brewery, for six years together, which is where we met. After we both ended our previous relationships, we realized we had already had the experience of working on physically and mentally difficult tasks with one another at the brewery, and that we could get through some of life’s hardest times with one another while still enjoying each other’s company along the way. Thus began our amazing partnership.

I have been deeply involved in my stepdaughter’s life since she was five years old. I moved in with Nate and Maya when she was nine years old and started helping her with learning to read and write, to catch up so she could attend school for the first time since preschool. I came from a blended family myself and immediately fell so in love with this girl that she became a daughter to me. I believe it is amazing to have so many people who love, care about and support you no matter what.

Maya loves reading books and has a high reading level. She’s a talented artist, especially painting, and is doing very well in public school. Maya enjoys hiking and camping, road trips and visiting new places. She is a fantastic helper and loves to bake in the kitchen and assist us in the Children’s Garden Club at Parker Learning Gardens. It has been an honor to watch her grow into the young woman she is now at age 13. I’m so proud of her and excited to continue to support her in her dreams as she gets older.

Nate and I married Nov. 1, 2020, and decided to grow our family soon after. Ronan was born in August 2021 and has filled our lives with so much joy and laughter, awe and sleepless nights. Ronan is crazy about his big sister and enjoys giving her snuggles in the mornings and goodnight kisses. He misses her when she is gone, yelling her name up the stairs when breakfast is ready.

Ronan loves his new daycare, where he is learning Spanish a few days a week, and making new friends while we get some work done. He is a mama’s boy who loves being outside, enjoys animals, reading books,

climbing and eating good food. He also enjoys helping us with farm chores, especially with the chickens and pigs. Ronan especially likes the Wonder Gardening for Tots class at Parker Learning Gardens that we teach together with him.

We love to involve our children in everything we do, to provide them a well-rounded and balanced life with physical activity, healthy organic food, a passion for nature and the health of our planet, and a high quality education with the opportunity to learn multiple languages. It is our goal to provide stability, reliability, love and support for our children and teach them how to incorporate these things into their own lives.

Every family has its own traditions, rituals or inside jokes. What are some of yours?

One time I was talking to my husband about a grain mill that we could use for some Painted Mountains Heirloom Corn we grew into cornmeal. I had thoroughly explained the entirety of the electric mill that our neighbor has that I wanted to borrow for this project. He looked up at me from what he was working on, and said “So, it’s a hand-crank?” and my daughter and I started laughing so hard. I couldn’t even respond, it was so far off from the specific description of the electric grain mill I had just given him. Now when someone is clearly not listening, my daughter and I say, “So, it’s a hand-crank?”

When did you know you wanted to be a mom?

My whole life and growing up in a blended family, I was open to and familiar with that not necessarily meaning I birthed the child. Although I’m pretty sure it takes longer than four years to prepare mentally and emotionally for having a teenager! But are you ever really ready for a teenager?

Tell us about one of your proudest mom moments. When my daughter played her electric guitar for everyone at our baby shower and she, my mom and I all sang a song together. This took a lot of guts and I was so proud of her to have learned the song and overcome her stage fright enough to play it. After years of guitar lessons, this was such a special way to celebrate her new baby brother.

BETWEEN FARMING, RUNNING A NON-PROFIT AND A COUPLE OF SIDE HUSTLES, LIFE FOR THIS MOM OF TWO IS HOPPING. THE KEY: NOT USING UP YOUR SPOONS ALL IN ONE DAY.

MOM's Favorite...

Tell us about your favorite…

…words to live by: Some of the best days of our lives haven’t happened yet.

…place to find some peace & quiet: The woods

…binge-worthy TV or podcast: Call the Midwife

…way to get out of making dinner: Planning dinner at a friend or family’s house.

…time-saving app or digital tool: Meta Business Suite

Now tell us about one of your most humbling mom moments. Potty training a 17-monthold is no joke. The moments you find yourself stripping poop- and pee-covered clothes off trying to avoid contaminating your face and the rest of the house, while also not getting upset so that the toddler doesn’t think they’re in trouble for going potty…nothing could be more humbling.

We’re all moms so we know that no one is perfect all of the time, or even some of the time. Tell us about your most recent “Mother of the Year” moment. You know, like forgetting to pick the kids up from school. On one of my most sleep-deprived weeks of my life, I left the sleeping baby in the car, completely forgetting about him because my daughter and I were having so much fun chatting on our way to have lunch with some of our friends. My husband had loaded him in the car seat for me, and he was completely silent in the back seat the whole ride. My daughter had just started riding in the front seat like the week before this, which was also new and distracting. I ran out during our lunch realizing I had left him, and I cried and called my husband after sending our friends on their way with Maya to the bookstore, telling them I would meet them there. My husband was so supportive, and I was reassured that my baby was completely okay and very happy to have me rescue him. I remember Nate saying, “Well, you won’t do it again because you won’t forget this.” That has been true to this day. Still felt like the worst mom in the world, and will likely never let go of that guilt.

What is something you swore you would never do before kids that you now do? Disposable diapers, after one whole year of cloth. In what way are your children like you? How are they different? Maya takes after her dad and is more of a quiet person until you get to know her. When she’s comfortable with someone, she tends to be silly and light-hearted. I’ve always been outgoing, and I struggle to take a step back and allow her the space and time to adjust to things at her own pace. It’s a good balance of strong encouragement (you know to ask where a bathroom is located, or order your own food) and patience, patience, patience.

Ronan is much more like me so far: loud, independent, stubborn, goofy…he’s even showing signs of my personality coming through. The other morning he adjusted the corner of the bathroom rug that had flipped over — he’s only one!

You know you’re a mom when you hear yourself say, “______________.” If you heard me, then please respond.

No one works harder than mom.

We know that being a mom is a full-time job. How do you balance (or not) motherhood, activities, work, volunteering, household responsibilities, and life in general? What sometimes falls through the cracks? I have two calendars and a planner. My husband and I sit down once a week and transfer anything on the calendars onto the next week and the next one. We talk about the dinner calendar (okay, so that’s three calendars), and if our daily schedules for the week need to be adjusted accordingly for an appointment or errands.

We have daily schedules that divide the day into two halves, whomever is on morning duty gets up when the alarm goes off, makes breakfast, makes Maya’s lunch, takes Maya to school and Ronan to daycare, and makes lunch for the two of us at home (where we work). The other person picks the kids up, does errands as needed, and makes dinner. We each have an even number of days we do each shift during the week, making our availability more flexible for work. Our schedule also includes optional time for self-care such as exercise, bathing or rest as needed.

Tell us about your work or volunteerism outside of the home. I volunteer my time as assistant farm manager, instructor and board secretary for Parker Learning Gardens. I also run a side business doing sewing alterations and repairs. It is my goal to have a paid position through Parker Learning Gardens this year, but nobody ever said it was easy to start a non-profit from the ground up. We’re passionate about teaching children and families in our community to be as sustainable as possible, to care about well-rounded

MOMs Love Local

We love locally owned businesses, restaurants, places and organizations. Share your favorite…

…shop to pick up a gift for a friend: Market of Choice… honestly, I’m already there anyway!

…coffee spot: Southpine Bakery

…spot to get a good workout: Coburg Fit Club

…place to treat yourself to a mani/pedi other personal service: Luxe Nails & Spa

…restaurant to take the kids: North Fork Public House, Mezza Luna Pizzeria

…restaurants for a date night: B2 Wine Bar, Bao Bao House, Tacovore, Izakaya Meiji, Marche, Planktown (Springfield), George & Violets Steakhouse (Springfield)

…take-out, food truck or quick bite: Sammitch, Taco El Paisa (Coburg), Taqueria Mi Pueblo

…boutique to find a new shirt or home décor item: St.Vincent de Paul on Chad Dr.

…event in your community: County Line Flowers summer benefit concerts (Harrisburg)

…any other local places you love: Vitality Bowls, The Human Bean, Parker Learning Gardens, Camas Swale Farm, Lane County Farmers Market

organic nutrition and to be good environmental stewards. It’s worth every volunteer hour to see the awe and wonder in a student’s eyes throughout every single class or workshop I teach.

What have you learned professionally that has helped you as a mom? To give myself some grace. I have an extremely high standard for professionalism and sometimes it’s actually better to set reasonable expectations and be okay with the outcome knowing I did my best. Tell us about a recent achievement you’re proud of, or a personal passion or talent. I overcame postpartum depression recently, and it was the hardest thing I have ever gone through. It took a lot of work, self-love, self-care, transparency with friends and family, admitting to myself that I cannot do everything I used to and accepting that, lots of therapy, remembering to utilize all of the mental health tools I have gained up to this point in life, and asking for help…a lot of help. I learned about the concept of having so many spoons when you wake up in the morning, and with each hard thing you do, you have to give up a spoon. I was running out of spoons by 7 to 9 a.m. most days of the week. After blood tests to check my hormones and for any nutrient deficiencies, doctors visits, midwife visits, classes, hangouts with friends, and way more TV than I’d like to admit, I’m feeling like I have overcome maybe one of the most difficult things I will ever have to endure.

If mom’s not happy, nobody’s happy.

Tell us about your upbringing. How did it shape the mother you are today? My mother made sure I knew how to run a business and be as professional as possible. This made me a hireable leader who can make decisions quickly. This also made me efficient, able to prioritize and very organized. My father instilled a passion for nature, survival skills, sustainability and having fun. Both of my parents were always the best at what they chose to do. This carries over to me as well, but I have observed how these skill sets and ways of being have positively and negatively affected both of my parents over

time, and I have adapted my own set of stubborn rules for life from the examples they gave me. I’m currently re-assessing my set of rules, hoping to enable myself to have a little more wiggle room. I’m human and not perfect. I’m often sleep-deprived and overstimulated, and I am my own worst critic. I’m learning to make some adjustments and lighten up on myself so that my kids can watch and learn from my example someday too. I want to be a good role model for them on how to live a healthy lifestyle and the importance of finding your own balance.

When was the last time you did something for the first time? I birthed a child and breastfed him. Makes me think I need to go bungee jumping or something!

Which good habit do you wish you started earlier? Exercising regularly.

What is one thing you never had that you want for your kids? Only organic food.

If you could instantly have one new skill (i.e. foreign language, musical talent, eyes in the back of your head, etc.), what would it be?

I would be an incredible banjo player, not just a mediocre one.

What’s your superpower? I actually would be a super villain… like one of those cheesy super villains who are just filling other villains’ spaceships with silly string, or replacing the lava in volcanoes with caramel. My super villain name is Veronimous Shrug. I’ve always wanted to draw/write comic books.

Name one thing that is part of your daily routine that you just can’t live without. Fresh organic eggs in the morning.

Tell us something about you that would surprise your kids (or your partner). I secretly love Arby’s Beef N’ Cheddar sandwiches.

What keeps you sane? Making time for exercising with friends.

What is your least/most favorite household chore? Least favorite: dishes. Favorite: washing the laundry…not folding it, though.

What’s your guilty pleasure? (dark chocolate hidden in the pantry, TJ Maxx, daily latte habit?) Dark chocolate cocoa with oat milk

What is your greatest extravagance? Brand new books

Who is your favorite fictional hero? Captain Planet

Outside of your family members, who/what inspires you to be better? My hard-working farm-mom friends.

What is something you think everyone should do at least once in their lives? Go skinny dipping or bathe in a river/stream/creek.

They say that everyone has a book in them. What’s the title of your book? The Chaos Coordinator

Listen to mom.

Is motherhood what you expected? What surprised you the most? No, it’s much harder. I didn’t realize I’d lose so much sleep and be worried so much.

What’s the best advice you’ve received from another mom? You have to be okay to be able to take care of others.

What advice would you give your younger mom self? What do you wish you knew then that you know now? Don’t be so dead set on everything going the way you have planned; it’s likely it won’t.

What message would you like to share with other moms? Remember to tell it like it is. When you say, “I don’t have time for….” try replacing it with “I am choosing not to prioritize….” and see how it resonates with you. If you feel guilty, then you’re likely not choosing the best choice for you or your family.

Audrey Benson Behavior Supervisor

922 NW Circle Blvd, Ste 160-112 Corvallis, OR 97330

kidsnw.org | 1.888.360.0360

Sitter Success

Training a new babysitter can be nerve-wracking, especially if you’re leaving your little ones in someone else’s care for the first time. But you deserve a night (or more) off, where you can eat dinner before it goes cold and no one uses you as a human napkin.

A little planning goes a long way to ease everyone’s minds when it comes to a new babysitter. A few tips... Clearly communicate your expectations, specific instructions and rules you have for your children, including bedtime routines, screen time preferences, household safety, etc. Providing a written list of instructions can be helpful, as it ensures that nothing is missed. Take some time to familiarize the babysitter with your home and any off-limits areas. I always take this opportunity to show the babysitter where the only-after-the-kidsgo-to-bed snacks are located.

Provide your sitter with your contact information and where you’ll be going. I always leave the basics: my number, the neighbor’s number and emergency contact information. And mom, remember to fully charge your phone and check it periodically, especially if it’s going to be a late night out.

Finally, consider the first time you’re working with a new babysitter as a trial run. I do this a few times to gauge their skills, trustworthiness and character. If it’s not a good fit, don’t hesitate to find a better care provider for your family. It’s important to trust your instincts and choose someone you feel comfortable with and confident in.

Training a new babysitter takes a bit of preparation and communication, but it’s worth it for the occasional childfree date night.

If you’re needing additional training assistance with a care provider, leave all the heavy lifting to our Direct Support Career Academy. We offer courses on a wide variety of support skills, specializing in positive, personcentered approaches to meet the needs of people with intellectual and/or developmental disabilities.

Brought to you by:

EASY FLIGHTS FROM EUGENE TO SAN DIEGO

Alaska Airlines begins daily non-stop flights to San Diego from Eugene starting June 15. Allegiant Airlines will fly between Eugene and San Diego on Sundays and Thursdays June 8 to Aug. 13.

Southwest Airlines has added once-a-week flights on Saturdays through September 2. If those new flights are well received, Allegiant and Southwest may extend the new flights year-round. You can also take daily connecting flights with United, Delta and American Airlines.

SAN DIEGO

Escaping Oregon to get to sunshine and beaches just got a lot easier, with non-stop flights from the Eugene Airport. In just over two hours you can be in this world-class destination.

I’ve always loved San Diego and make it a point to visit as often as possible. Even if you have been before, there’s always a new area to explore including Coronado Island, Carlsbad, Mission Bay, Downtown, the Waterfront and La Jolla.

SUNSHINE & BEACHES

San Diego has an average year-round daily temperature of 70 degrees and 300 days of sunshine a year. There are 70 miles of beaches to enjoy every type of water activity including surfing, boating, standup paddle boarding and kayaking. Be sure to allow time for your kids to dig in the sand and play on the beach. Renting bikes, skateboards or electric scooters to ride along the beach are fun activities.

BIG NAME ATTRACTIONS

SeaWorld in Mission Bay is always a favorite, with plenty of new features and seasonal events to keep everyone entertained. The newly opened Sesame Place is great fun for younger kids with lots of water activities too.

THE PERFECT FAMILY VACATION

BY DONNITA CAGLE BASSINGER, CTC, MCC

If you love animals, San Diego is the place for you. The San Diego Zoo in Balboa Park is home to over 3,700 animals on 100 acres. The San Diego Safari Park (formerly called Wild Animal Park) is 35 miles north of San Diego. It is a wildlife sanctuary on 1800 acres with over 2600 animals. Both are wonderful places to learn about animals in natural surroundings. One of my all-time favorite experiences was taking a behind-the-scenes tour with a knowledgeable guide at the San Diego Zoo. This two-hour experience can be reserved for $90 per person (in addition to regular admission).

The additions at LEGOLAND have made it worthy of a two- to three-day visit. LEGOLAND is located in Carlsbad, about 30 miles north of San Diego. The parks are perfect for kids ages 2 to 13 and are well-planned and interactive, for both kids and adults. They also have the Sea Life Aquarium and a waterpark open from March to October. Check the website as the days that each park is open vary throughout the year. The best value is to get a multi-day ticket for all three parks.

And for almost everything in San Diego, you will need a rental car with navigation as things are spread out. Be aware that parking can be expensive as some theme parks charge $30 per day.

SeaWorld San Diego and Sesame Place are both Certified Autism Centers. All park employees have been trained and certified to support visitors on the autism spectrum.

TORREY PINES STATE BEACH

EDUCATION & ENTERTAINMENT

One of the best things about visiting San Diego is you can learn so much while having fun. I suggest you spend at least one day at beautiful Balboa Park where you can choose from 16 museums to visit as well as numerous trails, gardens, playgrounds and sport venues. They offer passes if you want to get the most out of your visit. A Limited Explorer Pass allows you to visit up to four museums in one day for $56 for adults and $35 for ages 3 to 12. The Parkwide Pass offers admission to all of the Balboa Park museums over seven consecutive days for $67 for adults and $43 for ages 3 to 12.

The downtown waterfront area is a fun place to spend the day. You can start with the USS Midway Museum which is a giant aircraft carrier

with over 25 restored aircraft onboard. If you want to learn more, the Maritime Museum is made up of two submarines, the Star of India sailing ship and six other vessels. You can take various boat rides and enjoy the street performers and vendors as you stroll down to Seaport Village which offers live music, shopping and lovely views. The Old Town Trolley is a hop-on, hop-off tour of San Diego with narration that brings history alive.

Whether you can only get away for a long weekend or if you have a whole week to spend, there’s something for everyone in San Diego. Contact your favorite travel agent to start planning today.

MEET VACATION MOM TM

AIRLINES SERVING THE EUGENE AIRPORT

Alaska Airlines: AlaskaAir.com

Allegiant: Allegiantair.com

American Airlines: AA.com

Avelo Airlines: Aveloair.com

Delta: Delta.com

Southwest: Southwest.com United: United.com

Vacation MOM is brought to you in partnership with Eugene Airport

Donnita Bassinger has been a travel agent for three decades and she enjoys sending families on vacations around the world. She is a mom to three boys and has taken her family to San Diego numerous times. She is the owner of VIP Vacations, Inc. and she is happy to chat with you about your travel plans.

Contact Donnita at 541-913-5272

@VacationMOMpage

BALBOA PARK USS MIDWAY MUSEUM

LEGGOLAND

You started out the school year thinking you’d do like those influencers with their adorable flower-shaped sandwiches and bento boxes…then real life set in.

Now as we near the end of the school year, your enthusiasm for packing school lunches has run as dry as that PB&J your kid keeps bringing home uneaten. Use these main course ideas to carry you to summer break. They can all be made the day before, are reasonably healthy and are easy on your budget.

Pinwheel wraps

Flour tortillas: try the sun-dried tomato basil ones for something different

Deli turkey

Cheese slices of your choosing

Lettuce

Hummus

Optional: pepper or other seasoning like Everything But the Bagel

Lay out a tortilla and spread with hummus. Layer the meat and cheese, then add lettuce. If your kid likes a little seasoning, shake it on.

Roll up the tortilla snug, then cut into 2-inch circles. Lay each pinwheel flat in a lunch container.

Are you kidding?

No one does this.

At least, no one we know in real life. How would this even survive a backpack transport to school?

Kid-friendly quesadillas

8 large flour tortillas

2 - 3 cups shredded chedder cheese

2 cans of black beans, rinsed and drained

1 tsp basil

1 tsp oregano

½ tsp salt

Put black beans in a microwave-safe container, then stir in basil, oregano and salt. Cover and microwave on high for two minutes, stopping midway to stir. Set aside. Heat a pan on medium and coat with cooking spray. Place a tortilla in the pan, then immediately add ¼ cup black beans and about ⅓ cup shredded cheese to one side of the tortilla. Flip the tortilla closed and press with a spatula to make a seal as the cheese melts. Turn the quesadilla over to heat the other side. These cook quickly, and while it’s tempting to turn up the heat, don’t: it makes burn spots.

Repeat this process until all have been made. Use a pizza cutter to divide them into thirds, then refrigerate. If your child likes salsa, add a small side of it to their lunch box.

10 LITTLE TOES...

10 BIG REASONS TO HAVE YOUR BABY AT MCKENZIE-WILLAMETTE MEDICAL CENTER.

ALL IN ONE, LABOR, DELIVER & RECOVERY ROOMS (INCLUDING JACUZZI TUBS)

STATE-OF-THE-ART NEWBORN SAFETY SYSTEM

24/7 IN-HOUSE LABORISTS (OB)

24/7 ON-CALL CERTIFIED NURSE M IDWIVES

24/7 ON-CALL PEDIATRIC HOSPITALISTS

24/7 ON-CALL LACTATION SPECIALISTS

LEVEL II SPECIAL CARE NURSERY

MATERNITY CARE COORDINATOR

CHILDBIRTH EDUCATION/CLASSES

DIY lunchables

Cubed salami or summer sausage

Cheese sliced into squares

Whole-wheat crackers

Dried mango or pear slices

Pre-peeled clementine

Arrange each item into a divided container.

We like these...

10

Rubbermaid’s LunchBlox offer sturdy reusability. We like how they snap into their ice tray: no more jumbled up items that don’t get properly cooled.

10 big reasons to have your baby at McKenzie-Willamette Medical Center:

• All-in-one labor, delivery & recover rooms (including whirlpool tubs)

• Water birth available

• State-of-the-art newborn safety system

• 24/7 in-house laborists (OB)

COMING SOON NITROUS OXIDE OPTION DURING LABOR VISIT MCKWEB.COM, MATERNITY SERVICES FOR MORE INFORMATION

• 24/7 on-call certified nurse midwives and lactation services

• 24/7 on-call pediatric hospitalists

• Level II special care nursery

• Maternity Care Coordinator

• Childbirth education/classes

• Nitrous oxide option during

WHAT’S TRENDING IN/OUT

homedecor & more

TRENDING IN

Large dome pendant lights

Low divider sinks

Induction stoves

Lux laundry rooms

Arches

TRENDING OUT

Open kitchen shelving: too hard to keep tidy Sad washed out greiges

Farmhouse everything, including sliding barn doors

HAVING A MOMENT... .

Fluted wood accents on furniture and walls

Wall accents made with geometric trim

An echo of art deco

ALWAYS IN: SUSTAINABILITY

Plants to help your indoor air quality

Reclaimed and upcycled everything

Solar panels

We have questions

Built-in water and feeding station for pets. Fido needs his bowl rinsed before refilling it. Without a drain to dump the slime water, what’s the point?

So you want to write a book…

Ah yes, the dream of writing the great American novel. Few actually follow through with it and even fewer reach publication. But it didn’t stop these moms, and it shouldn’t stop you either, especially as self-publishing has busted through many barriers of old school publication.

But getting started and finding the time to write can be a challenge. You can’t let your toddler sit in a dirty pull-up while you pursue your big dreams. Still, there are ways to make it work. These local authors have advice for other moms who are just starting out.

I’ve always wanted to write a book. How do I start?

Dineen: As simple as it sounds, just sit down and write. Get your idea onto paper (or computer) without worrying about anything else.

Hart: Read Lisa Cron’s Story Genius: How to Use Brain Science to Go Beyond Outlining and Write a Riveting Novel. It’s a brilliant book that guides writers step-by-step to complete a manuscript. For memoir writers, pick up a copy of Regina Brooks’ excellent You Should Really Write a Book: How to Write, Sell and Market Your Memoir.

DeMocker: Start with an idea you’re passionate about. My book rattled around in my brain for three years until a coach suggested a format for ideas she’d heard me explore.

What if I don’t have the degree/training/ background to be a writer?

Dineen: So what? I didn’t get my degree in writing. I never thought I could be a writer, but one day the voices started talking and I let them. In fact, I did more than that, I took dictation. That was thirty-five books ago.

Hart: While it’s essential to have a solid knowledge of grammar and punctuation, you don’t need a master’s degree in creative writing to be a writer. You just need a great idea and a commitment to writing a book.

DeMocker: I’d planned to go for an MFA in writing once my kids were in school, but between the demands of parenting and the expense of an MFA, I instead designed my own slow, customized and affordable study. I signed up for conferences, retreats, local classes, contests and critique groups. I have no regrets — and no grad school debt.

How do you find time to write when you have small children?

Hart: If you write a page a day for 365 days, you’ve got yourself a novel. I’ve written in and outside of my daughter’s dance studio for a decade. I’ve written at playgrounds, early in the morning, late at night, during naptime…you can do so much work in 10 minutes.

Dineen: You write early in the morning, late at night, during naptime. The truth is you aren’t going to be as prolific when you’re taking care of young kids, but as they grow up and get into school, you’ll have more time. Everything in its season.

DeMocker: Sometimes I got more done with young kids than I did later with older kids, because I knew if I didn’t write in those small writing slots then I wouldn’t have another chance until the next babysitter, school day or solo weekend retreat. I wrote while kids were in childcare, at school and in the evenings after bedtime. I also signed up for writing retreats at Colonyhouse (in Rockaway Beach) which helped tremendously.

When I find a moment of time to write, my brain pulls me back to things I should be doing instead, like laundry. Help!

Hart: I feel two ways about housework and other mundane tasks. First, I do some of my best thinking about my writing when I’m scrubbing the toilet or cleaning the refrigerator, and I always keep a notebook nearby or dictate my thoughts into my phone. But if you’ve got a really limited time to write, allow the laundry to pile up a bit. Your creativity and mental health are vital, and what a wonderful gift to give your kids by showing them how you’re honoring your passion for storytelling! They’ll remember this passion long after they remember having to wear the same pair of socks two days in a row.

Dineen: I’m not one of those authors who enforces writing time. My goal is to hit three thousand words a day but if the muse isn’t cooperating I do something else. I find that when I’m in the groove, I couldn’t care less about the laundry.

DeMocker: Get out of the house! And get a deadline. Deadlines tend to scare laundry into submission. I wrote in bookstores and coffee shops, often with other writers who also had kids.

Okay, I wrote something but I need help making it better. How and where do I go for that?

Hart: There are a couple of different ways to get feedback on your writing. You can join a writing organization such as Willamette Writers, Wordcrafters in Eugene or the Society of Children’s Book Writers and Illustrators and ask for help finding a writing group; in this type of group, you’ll read and comment on other writers’ works, and they’ll read and comment on yours. Or you can hire a professional editor.

Dineen: Join critique groups. Facebook is full of groups for all genres of authors. These are great places to meet other people who are in the same boat as you.

DeMocker: Don’t overlook friends, family, and neighbors. I had an informal “team” of people who offered to read my drafts, and then consistently gave good feedback. It’s a gift when people take that kind of time.

I finished it! Now what?

DeMocker: If you have thumbs up from readers you trust, including yourself, look

Will anyone care about what I’ve written? What if I’m no good?

Hart: Someone’s always going to care about what you’ve written. At the very least, your kids will care. My mother was a journalist and an author, and I treasure her short stories and articles. Also, who gets to determine what’s “good?” Sometimes, I’ll try to read a bestselling novel, and I’ll give up because it doesn’t resonate with me. Everyone — readers, editors, literary agents — has vastly different tastes in storytelling. If you work hard and hone your craft, you’ll find an audience that appreciates your work.

Dineen: If you’re like me, you’re writing a book because you have a story to tell. Don’t censor yourself while you’re doing it. There will always be critics, but if you believe in your story, and are willing to take the necessary steps, you will find your audience.

DeMocker: People care about stories that move them in some way. Work on expressing yourself authentically. Work on the craft of scene writing and dialogue. Learn how to research. Read a lot of great writing. Writing is a life-long practice, and you will get better

for an agent or contest (but don’t pay for either). If your book is nonfiction, write a book proposal, not the whole book. If it’s a novel, memoir, or picture book, write the whole thing before pitching agents or editors.

Hart: You can opt to publish independently, you can find a literary agent who will work to sell your finished manuscript, or you can shop it around to the editors of small and mid-sized literary publishers by yourself. There are so many ways to publish your work these days. You can also opt to work with a hybrid publisher such as Eugene’s Luminare Press; they offer copy editing, assistance with format and book cover, marketing, etc.

Dineen: It’s time to hire an editor! Whether you’re looking for a traditional publishing house or you’re going to self-publish, readers want to read a book free of errors. Your book should be developmentally as well as grammatically sound.

by working at it. It’s key to truly listen when trusted readers give you the gift of their honest, thoughtful feedback.

I need an illustrator. How do I find one?

Hart: If you’re publishing traditionally, your team will match you with an illustrator. If you’re publishing independently, you might browse illustrator portfolios at a site like Upwork.com or Fiverr.com and hire someone from there. Word of mouth and social media inquiries work well, and if there’s an illustrator whose work you adore, you can always contact them and ask for recommendations.

DeMocker: Your publisher will usually find your illustrator, though people also collaborate with friends. I invited my niece to illustrate four pages of my book, and it was an enjoyable challenge for both of us.

“Don’t censor yourself while you’re writing. There will always be critics, but if you believe in your story...you will find your audience.”

I’m ready to publish! Uh, how do I do that, exactly?

Dineen: It depends if you want to self-publish or traditionally publish. Many people think that traditional publishing is the way to go and that you’ll make more money. That has not been my experience. Traditional publishers no longer give new authors big advertising budgets. In fact, they expect the author to do their own advertising. Additionally, advances are not what they used to be. Five thousand dollars tends to be standard for newbies and middle list authors alike. That money goes fast, especially as you have to wait months/years before your book is actually published and royalties roll in, if they roll in . By self-publishing, I control how quickly my books come out, on what channels they’re released and who I market them to. The bottom line is that 99% of the time there’s no money in one book. So for me, the faster I release, the bigger the payout.

DeMocker: Take a class, attend a conference, hire a coach. For the traditional publishing route, most writers pitch an agent with either the first 50 pages of a novel/memoir or with a nonfiction book proposal. Some writers directly pitch editors at publishing houses. Others self-publish.

I did it! I published my book online and now the money will rain down upon me, right? When do I get an agent who gets me a Hollywood script deal?

DeMocker: This happens sometimes to hardworking, lucky authors with books that resonate with readers. Usually, though, selfpublished books are hard for audiences to find because there are so many of them. Most writers don’t earn money from books, so it’s important to enter into a book project with clarity about why you’re doing it. If you need money, you’ll find more efficient, reliable ways of earning (like getting a job). If, however, you’re in love with a story or passionate about an issue, and a book is the best way to share it with the world, it may be a wise choice — as long as you’re not relying on it for income.

Hart: It’s vital to start marketing your book six months to a year before it’s published. Think about your ideal audience and how best to reach them. Do they listen to podcasts? Read blogs? Attend regular events?

A year before my newest middle-grade novel Daisy Woodworm Changes the World came out, I put a media kit up on my website.

Because one of my main characters has Down syndrome, based on my brother, I reached out to hundreds of people connected with this particular demographic, from podcasters and magazine editors, to social media influencers and the directors of nonprofits. I’ve done numerous interviews and school and library visits related to the book because of all of my outreach well before it ever went to print.

Dineen: If you’re going into writing for insta-fame, your chances of that happening are akin to winning the lottery. Before publishing the book, I would recommend taking advertising courses online because no matter how you publish, you need to know how to find your audience. And you have to pay to do that through ads. Facebook, Amazon, and Instagram are where most of us find our readers. Join groups and build your tribe. Engage with bookstagrammers and booktockers. Start a website and consider blogging to help build your readership. Start a newsletter. I didn’t get movie studio interest until my fourth romantic comedy. Then I got a lot. And while that was very exciting, no movie has been made yet.

How do I go about promoting my book?

Hart: First, decide whether your story will educate people, inspire them, entertain them, or all three. Once you’ve identified how it will be of service to readers, this frees you up to start boldly promoting your work. Use social media. If you’re good with witty one-liners, use Twitter and Facebook. If you’re great on camera, use TikTok and Instagram stories. Ask if you can do

readings and workshops at your local library, nonprofits, bookstores, etc. Attend writing conferences, remote and in-person, and talk up your book and learn about other people’s books, as well. Write short articles and personal essays related to the themes/ topics in your book, and publish them in newspapers and magazines. I love helping authors to create and execute a marketing plan!

Dineen: Most people think their friends and family are going to be their biggest advocates, and all they have to do is write the book and everyone who knows them will buy it. Yes, there will be people excited for you, and yes they may order a book or two, but the long-term promotion is down to you. You need to learn how to place ads and be prepared to spend money to do so. It can be frustrating and there’s a lot of trial and error, but it’s the process. People can’t buy your book if they don’t know about it.

DeMocker: Six months before publication, start researching publications, media outlets and organizations that might appreciate your message or story. Make a clear marketing plan and reserve time weekly to follow through on it. The book’s audience will grow the more you engage your target audience with a great story or with solutions they need.

Any other advice?

Hart: Own your stories. Yes, the writer’s life can be difficult; there’s a lot of rejection, a lot of anxiety. But when you’re deep in the midst of creating fiction or nonfiction, none of that matters. Your story is important; it

deserves to be told. Find a support group in person or online — people who can relate to the complicated emotions that emerge when you set out to write, people who cheer you on and bring you cookies when you’ve experienced a setback. I love what the people at A Very Important Meeting are doing; you can sign up for an hour-long online session with other writers from around the world. It’s a wonderful way to meet people at all stages of their writing careers, from authors with several books to absolute beginners.

DeMocker: Be curious and playful in your writing. Hang out with other writers. Read voraciously.

Dineen: All of this may sound a bit overwhelming. It’s not my intention to dissuade you from your dreams by making publishing sound like an insurmountable task. But like anything, it’s a lot of hard work and a steep learning curve. Don’t expect to learn everything all at once. Day by day, step by step and you’ll eventually get there. The most important thing is to have fun with your writing. That’s the part of this whole thing that makes the tough stuff worth doing.

About the authors

Melissa Hart is the author of Avenging the Owl, Daisy Woodworm Changes the World, as well as Better with Books: 500 Diverse Books to Ignite Empathy and Encourage Self-Acceptance in Tweens and Teens. She lives in Eugene with her husband and teen daughter.

Mary DeMocker is the author of The Parents’ Guide to Climate Revolution: 100 Ways to Build a Fossil-Free Future, Raise Empowered Kids, and Still Get a Good Night’s Sleep. She lives in Eugene with her daughter and partner.

Whitney Dineen has published over 35 novels, the most recent as part of the Seven Brides for Seven Mothers series. She lives in Albany with her two daughters, husband and goldendoodle.

Where do lost retainers go?

PERHAPS THEY’RE WITH THE MISSING SOCKS

There must be a parallel universe that contains all of our children’s missing items. It’s a land beyond the school’s lost and found that contains floating earbuds, socks and many pairs of glasses.

Kids are prone to forgetting personal items (and hey, many of us adults are too; life is busy!), which is why we offer retainers for life. Our goal is to take away any worry for parents when it comes to retainers for their children or themselves. It’s important to keep wearing them: after you put in the effort with braces, you want to retain your progress, hence the name retainer. Teeth shift your whole life, so retainers are needed to keep them in place. With 3D scanning and printing, we are able to print models of your teeth and make in-house retainers which makes it more affordable. With a simple scan, we have a digital record forever. The program starts off with two sets of clear retainers for a low initial fee and a small copay thereafter. We also offer the program to patients who have had treatment elsewhere.

Our retainer for life program is good dental care, and a better plan than waiting until that universe with all of our missing stuff is discovered. Those lost retainers are likely under a giant pile of hoodies.

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