Resources to support anxious children

Tips and resources to help children who may be worried about Covid 19 (the corona virus) As a safe adult/ carer/ parent figure, you are the centre of your child’s world. They will take all their reference points from you, so first of all …You need to feel in control of your own worries.

Informing yourself from reliable sources can help you scale risks and add perspective. Here are some fact checking sources for adults and risk minimisation advice…. https://www.nhs.uk/conditions/coronavirus-covid-19/ …Check here before anywhere else as current guidance is changing rapidly. http://fullfact.org/health/wuhan-coronavirus/ …separate myths from facts. www.ourworldindata.org/coronavirus … has detailed statistics and research.

Keeping to usual routines as far as possible will give all aged children the message that adults are still in control, the current situation is only “for now”, and we will all get through this. Reassure children and emphasise what helps us stay safe.

If you are at home with school age children, find some things that they can have choices over. When choice is taken away, it can be helpful to give some of that back, even if it needs to be artificially created. For example, try setting up a ‘tuck shop’ where the child can ‘purchase’ snacks throughout the day. If you set healthy food as cheaper and give a daily spending limit, children can learn about money and making healthy choices too.

Regular family meetings if you are in isolation this forum can help you feel connected and give a chance to check in with each other. Come up with some simple Family Rules…e.g. Unless unwell….1) Be dressed by 9am 2) Do some exercise 3) Limit screen time 4) Have a goal for the day 5) Do something fun together 6) Don’t kill each other…try and talk it through!

Do monitor and limit screen time when indoors lots. Most phones/ tables have ‘downtime’ and ‘app limits’ that can be set via the settings section. Having a ‘phones downstairs at night time’ rule means that your child will also have bed time away from the often heightened environment of social media, and covid 19 worries are not being placed directly into their safe space.

Don’t stop cuddles or limit touch. All children who you live with, (but especially young ones), will need your physical touch and presence. There are some great Theraplay games that allow children to feel connected and allow you both to share some fun E.g. https://st-marks.wilts.sch.uk/wpcontent/uploads/2018/05/Examples-of-theraplay-games.pdf ... different games listed here, and there are also some great Youtube videos showing these games e.g. https://youtu.be/u5kT_DNGcmI Deep pressure touch (proprioceptive) generally has a calming effect on our body. If a child is feeling anxious then touch and closeness is likely to help. Find fun ways to offer this by laying your child face down and making them into pizza... (add imaginary tomato sauce and toppings before pretending to taste how yummy they are!)…or have the child sit in front of you and draw messages or shapes on their back for them to guess. Clean everyone’s hands before you play, (you can make it into a waving game?!) and try more ideas below…

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(taken from the Theraplay Institutes ‘Activities for Anxious Children, www.theraplay.com)

Use touch based connections games such as Theraplay, Sensory and rhythmic activities (e.g. https://www.learning4kids.net/list-of-sensory-play-ideas/ and Proprioceptive games to help calm

Examples of deep pressure (proprioceptive) calming activities…

1. Bear hugs – Wrap your arms around your chest or knees and give yourself a firm hug.

2. Squeezing putty or play dough. Do this alone or together to see what silly shapes are made.

3. Yoga Poses (especially ones with two people balancing with each other) 4. Push me Pull me - carer sits on cushion holding a scarf, and child pulls (or pushes) them across the room. Vary with child pushing carer over with their hands or feet and giving a helping hand back up again.

5. Commando crawling through tunnels, under a blanket.

6. Wall Push Ups: Put both hands on the wall with the feet a little farther than arm’s length back from the wall. Lean your body towards the wall and back out or push both hands against the wall for 5-10 seconds with arms extended.

Chair push ups are similar, sitting with upright posture in a chair, the child put his/her hands on the side of the seat. The child lifts and holds his/her bottom up off the seat for 3-5 seconds and then slowly lowers back down into the chair.

7. Carry heavy things: Give the child a job to organize heavy books, or play passing games with weighted stuffed animals toys 8. Butterfly taps – cross your arms in front of your chest and tap hands alternately near collar bone, slowly as you start to feel calmer 9. Rolling the child in a blanket across the room as a ‘Sausage Roll’, or squishing between two big cushions like a burger!

10. Head squash –place interlaced fingers on top of head, downward pressure feels calming

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Explain to children about Covid 19 and that they are in a low risk group can be helpful. This leaflet is explicitly about Covid 19 for primary school aged children; http://www.mindheart.co/descargables and has the leaflet in many different languages. https://nursedottybooks.com/dave-the-dog-is-worried-about-coronavirus-2/ great for younger children Respond with child-friendly words and open questions to children’s worries, checking what the child knows and understands from what they’ve heard. Avoiding talking can give a child the message that it’s too scary to talk about, which in turn makes them worry more. Take your cues from your child and match to their emotional age. Let them know that all their feelings are OK. Stay playful and be creative if the child needs to talk about worries. E.g. Make a 'worry box'.

Your child can write each worry down and post it in the box out of sight. Small children will enjoy decorating the box too. They can leave the worries in there for, say, a week to see if they were worth worrying about (if not they can be torn up). Alternatively, if worry is feeling obsessive, you could designate a specific 'worry time' for around 10 minutes, once or twice a day (but not too close to bedtime, or when the child is in bed), so worries can be saved up for that time. This gives the message that they are in control of their worries and not vice versa. Sometimes writing down worries in the ‘worry time’ and then singing them out from the script lessens their impact.

Acknowledge that anxiety is a normal feeling, and Covid 19 IS worrying, but we can feel anxious feelings and they will pass. They don’t need to overwhelm us. Be curious about how your child experiences worry in their body. If a child or young person is becoming obsessively anxious, and panicky here’s a top ‘TIPP’ using distress tolerance skills…

Temperature: when we’re upset our bodies often feel hot. Cool down with a splash of cold water or sucking an ice cube or blow of fresh cool air.

Intense exercise: do intense exercise to match your intense emotion. Increased oxygen flow helps decrease stress levels.

Paced breathing: controlling your breath can drastically reduce panic symptoms. There’s lots of breathing techniques – 4/7/8 is a good one; breathe in for 4 counts, hold for 7 counts and out for 8 counts, Steady breathing reduces your body’s fight/flight response.

Paired muscle Relaxation: it not as complicated as it sounds! Just try tightening your fists hard, then relaxing them, and next your arms, and so on across your whole body. The muscle will become more relaxed than it was before it was tightened, requiring less oxygen and so slowing down your breathing and heart rate – magic!?!

Staying in the moment with a child who is feeling anxious is often helpful. This is often called ‘Mindfulness’ and there’s lots of activities that can be used, e.g. 5,4,3,2,1 …name 5 things you can see, 4 things you can hear, 3 things you can touch, 2 things you can smell, and 1 big deep slow breath. Offering a cold drink or something chewy and focussing on body sensations also has a calming and grounding effect. Youtube has some great breath meditations for kids, e.g.… https://youtu.be/CvF9AEe-ozc e.g https://youtu.be/rUQOG5MAEfM ...there’s guided meditations for bed time too!

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Other sources of information and help: Hints and tips from Liverpool CAMHS https://wakelet.com/wake/564d7bc8-4bc9-462f-a9e1-2deb03150c3f Seasame Street link for self-care resources for families and children https://www.sesamestreet.org/caring Information for carers re. school closures and Special Educational Needs (SEND) https://amazesussex.org.uk/faqsabout-the-coronavirus-for-parent-carers-of-children-with-send-brighton-hove/ Centre for Disease Control advice on managing stress related to C19 https://www.cdc.gov/coronavirus/2019ncov/prepare/managing-stress-anxiety.html Anna Freud Centre’s young people’s mental health website ‘On My Mind’ https://www.annafreud.org/on-my-mind/ Sheffield CAMHS young people’s mental health information https://epicfriends.co.uk/ Young Minds – talking to kids about C19 - https://youngminds.org.uk/blog/talking-to-your-child-about-coronavirus/ Child Mind Institutes guide for carers about talking to children about C19 https://childmind.org/article/talking-to-kidsabout-the-coronavirus/ Really clear video explaining to children about C19 https://vimeo.com/399311004 Free Mindfulness resources https://positivepsychology.com/mindfulness-for-children-kids-activities/ How to teach mindfulness to kids https://leftbrainbuddha.com/10-ways-teach-mindfulness-to-kids/ A range of resources from Educational Psychologist about C19 https://edpsy.org.uk/blog/2020/coronavirus-covid-19information-for-children-families-and-professionals/ Link to a useful social story for older young people https://carolgraysocialstories.com/wpcontent/uploads/2020/03/Pandemics-and-the-Coronavirus.pdf London Trauma centre guide for teenagers/ adults on managing anxiety related to C19 https://londontraumaspecialists.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/03/LTS-Coronavirus-Managing-Anxiety.pdf?fbclid=IwAR1JDZBrKWf0Y_YM71rzD8V6e-7t_xWshHRw5VBPSyxZVqG9TxNrVlPnhsQ

*STOP PRESS* Radio Sheffield are launching a special service called ‘Make A Difference’ about the help and support that’s available locally across South Yorkshire and North Derbyshire. Bulletins are planned at quarter past and quarter to every hour 6am-6pm and you can get up to date local information including cancellations and sources of additional help. Tune in or email radio.sheffield@bbc.co.uk Use their usual phone number (tel: 08001114949) if you can help others. Helping others is a known way to promote our own sense of well being and help us feel more in control…

…During these strange and changing times, let’s look after our children and each other; staying at home = working together to get rid of this virus!

Rotherham Therapeutic Team: 01709 822684 LAACSupportTeam@rotherham.gov.uk RMBC, 24.03.2020.

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