VSA Unpaid Carers Taking Time for Me Toolkit

TAKING TIME FOR ME CARERS TOOLKIT

“Too busy caring to take care of me” Sound familiar? Carers frequently neglect

their own health and wellbeing; prioritising the needs of the person they care for whilst feeling selfish for taking time to relax and have fun. With some carers even cancelling their own essential Doctor or Hospital appointments and even operations in some cases!

However, carers experience higher levels of stress, poorer physical and mental health than people who are not caring. This can lead to carer breakdown and the inability to continue in their caring role on top of long term physical and mental health issues. The evidence makes it clear that practicing self-care must become a priority for those with a caring role.

The aim of this toolkit is to help you look at how this might be possible for you. It provides you with information about helpful ways to reduce stress and improve your physical and mental health and some ideas of how you might be able to make some changes that help you to take better care of you.

You can also get in touch if you would like further support from a Carer Advisor who can provide additional information and advice

What is life like at the moment?

Take a moment to think about your typical daily/weekly routine; maybe write this down under two headings. On one side activities that help you relax and feel good and on the other side activities that are stressful, tiring, or boring. You may find some activities sit somewhere in the middle and can sometimes be enjoyable or sometimes cause stress.

Do you feel there is a healthy balance? If your list of relaxing/enjoyable activities is very small can you think of ways this could be increased? If the stressful/tiring/boring list is very large are there ways these activities could be reduced?

It might be useful to complete an Adult Carer Support Plan designed to look at the issues you are currently experiencing in your caring role and help you develop a plan to improve your situation. Please get in touch and our Carer Advisors can support you to access and develop a plan

Helpful ways to manage stress and improve wellbeing:

1. Recharge - Take the time to relax and be kind to yourself

2. Exercise- Take regular gentle exercise such as walking, dancing, or jogging

3. Learn new skills- boost your self confidence and raise your self esteem. Why not try cooking, o doing a new DIY project or try a new hobbies

4. Connect with others- Reach out to family and friends and focus on what makes you happy

5. Pay attention to the present- practice mindfulness. Mindfulness can help you enjoy your life more andunderstand yourself better

https://www.nhsinform.scot/healthy-living/mental-wellbeing/five-steps-to-mental-wellbeing

Physical Health

Self-care isn’t always about relaxation, pampering and enjoyable activities but is about looking after your physical health too. Many carers neglect even basic health needs with some delaying or cancelling medical procedures and operations and might be something you have done yourself. To highlight the importance of looking after your own health needs think about the safety announcement the cabin crew gives on a flight. They explain that in an emergency where oxygen is required and masks drop from above ALWAYS secure your own mask first before helping others. In the same way, you simply can’t continue to care for others if our own health is overlooked. It’s vitally important that you do what you can to look after your physical health. Letting your GP know you are a carer can be helpful and your surgery might provide additional support for you; for example, providing your annual flu jab.

Sleep

Many carers report sleep problems as a result of their caring role. Perhaps the cared-for person is wakeful during the night or needs supervision. For many carers, the stress and anxiety brought on by their caring situation affects their sleep. Not getting enough good quality sleep makes coping with the ups and downs of your caring role much harder and in the long term, can significantly impact both physical and mental health. You may want to discuss sleep issues with your GP as well as looking at some of the links for further information about improving sleep here are some basic tips to get you started.

1. Try to set a regular sleep pattern going to bed and getting up at the same time each day

2. Take time to “wind down” and “switch off” at least an hour before bed (some of the mindfulness and relaxation information might be useful)

3. Try to avoid using your mobile phone or going on social media at bedtime

4. Avoid drinks with caffeine in them at least an hour before bed

Sleep link: https://www.nhsinform.scot/illnesses-and-conditions/mental-health/mental-health-self-help-guides/ sleep-problems-and-insomnia-self-help-guide

Diet

A common issue for carers is maintaining a healthy, nutritional diet. Often meals need to be fitted in between all the other caring tasks and have to be eaten quickly at random times of day or night. This often leads to reliance on convenience foods and snacking and can have a negative impact on health and wellbeing. You may go to great lengths to ensure the person you are caring for is eating well but neglect your own dietary needs. As a carer, it’s important to remember that food is your fuel. You wouldn’t expect your mobile phone to continue to work if you didn’t recharge the battery!

Exercise

Many carers have had to drastically reduce or give up hobbies and interests completely due to their caring role and this may include sports and exercise. With limited time, you may not see it as important or you might be physically and mentally drained by your caring role and have little motivation. However, research shows that regular exercise improves physical and mental health. You don’t have to train for a marathon to get exercise. You can do simple stretches while doing the hoovering, have a brisk walk around the block or dance to your favourite tunes in the kitchen. The important thing is to find an activity that you enjoy and fits in with your existing situation, rather than set yourself an impossible goal that becomes a source of stress. Please see the links for further ideas and tips.

https://www.nhs.uk/live-well/exercise/exercise-health-benefits/

Take a break

One of the common issues faced by carers is the lack of breaks from their caring role. Depending on your situation, you may not be able to access formal or informal time away from the person you are caring for. If this is an issue for you, please get in touch for information and advice about how you can possibly improve your ability to have a break from your caring role. Even when you are not physically with the person you care for it can be difficult to “switch off,” and you may constantly be worrying about them or what might happen while you are away. It might be helpful to develop some ways of coping better with switching off and feeling more relaxed. There are lots of different forms of relaxation and it’s important to find activities that are right for you. You might find using the visualisation exercise and the mindful breathing exercise in the clips useful and can use them anytime to help you feel more calm and relaxed. You might also want to use some of the smartphone apps such as CALM and Headspace (both have a small annual subscription) or one of the many others available and the links provide further information and ideas.

https://carers.org/taking-care-of-yourself/reducing-stress

https://www.moodjuice.scot.nhs.uk/relaxation.asp

Relaxation use clip of mountain meditation

For many carers, their situation can be filled with uncertainty, stress and worry. You can find it difficult to forget the past and the life you lived before having a caring role. Sometimes there aren’t easy solutions for the situation you are in and all these factors can have a huge impact on health and wellbeing. Mindfulness has been shown to have a significant impact on helping people to focus more on the “here and now” rather than constantly thinking about the past or worrying about the future. It helps you to feel more in control of thoughts and emotions and gives a chance to take a pause before reacting. Mindfulness is simply a way of paying attention and noticing in a non-judgemental way and a by-product of this can be feeling calmer. The clip explains mindfulness and gives a short breathing exercise.

Mindfulness do a new clip explain mindfulness

Although mindfulness can be meditation, any activity that allows you to focus and be in the present moment, not in your head, is being mindful. Jigsaw puzzles, creating art, yoga, reading, baking and even mundane tasks such as washing the dishes can be mindful if you are focusing on the experience rather than busy planning or ruminating in your head.

Stay Connected

When you have a caring role, it can often lead to a sense of loneliness and isolation, as it becomes harder to catch up with friends and family or get out and about. This can have a negative impact on your mental health and wellbeing and can easily turn into a vicious cycle, as you become less motivated to stay connected and start to lose touch with people. One very important form of connection for carers is with their peers; others, who have a similar caring role. Peer support can be extremely important in reducing the sense of loneliness and isolation so please get in touch if you would like to connect with other carers

at our groups and events.

Be Creative

Many caring tasks can be repetitive, frustrating and boring you can feel like you achieve very little and feel like it’s a thankless task, as opposed to paid work where at least there is a pay packet for the work that you do. You may have enjoyed hobbies, interests, or careers where you were able to gain a sense of achievement and be creative and that might have fallen by the wayside or become impossible now you are a carer. Evidence suggests, being creative can be beneficial to your health and wellbeing. For carers, creative activities can seem less important and you may feel selfish for “indulging” in these interests. However, it is important to remember the huge benefits from engaging in such activities. As well as being enjoyable, they can also be mindful as well as helping you relax, unwind and feel calmer. The links have information on creative ideas and activities

https://www.sharedcarescotland.org.uk/resources/short-breaks-for-strange-times/

How can you make some helpful changes?

Prioritise

Hopefully, you might have some useful information and ideas about what might help to improve your health and wellbeing. However, it might still feel impossible or very difficult to make time and space to do any of these things, given how busy and stressful your life already is. You might feel guilty and even selfish for taking time for yourself? Hopefully, you are now able to understand how important this is both for your own health and wellbeing and your ability to sustain your caring role and this will help you reduce your sense of guilt and to understand that self-care is never selfish. The tips and ideas should help you find a way of getting more of a balance and finding even small spaces in your day to take care of yourself.

Plan

You might find it useful when you are initially trying to make some changes to do some planning. Print out a weekly planner of self-care and commit regular time throughout the week for relaxation, exercise, mindful/creative activity, connecting with people, and remember to include mealtimes and your medical appointments. Although the plan may have to be fairly flexible, by writing it down, it’s a type of commitment to yourself. You are saying I am important too! You might want to display it somewhere prominent as a constant reminder to look after you. The link has a blank planner you can use to create your own unique plan.

MONDAY

TAKING TIME FOR ME

WEEKLY PLANNER

TUESDAY

WEDNESDAY

Other

https://carers.org/taking-care-of-yourself/reducing-stress

https://www.nhsinform.scot/healthy-living/mental-wellbeing/five-

https://llttf.com/

https://clearyourhead.scot/