A direct, face-to-face confrontation with fear and doubt. In essence, all fears arise from ignorance of the Self.
Kuṇḍaliṇī
of bonded existence is clearly apparent. That fear of transmigration, fueled by the insidious doubt of misperception, plays an important role in stimulating reflective awareness which is in itself the prelude to the recognition of the Oneself (
The spiritual quest is the confrontation with the unconscious part of the psyche. It can at once be unpleasant and terrifying, yet also a necessary preliminary for real spiritual growth.
The heroism of the vīra lies in the conquest of the fear one is compelled to face in the outer realm and in the deepest recesses of one’s identity. Such confrontation endows the vīra with a steadfast conviction that becomes a heroic and personhood-defining feature. This leads the Hero(ine) significantly further, to the ultimate knowledge of the Self.
Śaiva Tantra found a new way to challenge one of the most powerful emotional dynamics: fear and its consort, doubt. In this light, they can be a powerful stimulus for undertaking sādhanā, which is the means to reduce the contraction of consciousness that is the cause of bondage consequently leading to the expansion of consciousness and liberation.
This is a bravery that involves overcoming habitual tendencies of the unconscious latent impressions (saṃskāras), which are accumulated in the storehouse of past actions (karma), residing there in potential form as the seeds of transmigration (saṃsāra).
It is ultimately the fear of losing one’s identity that is the most ephemeral, yet the utmost powerfully veiling cloak that must be incinerated in the fire of intent. All other fears derive from that all-powerful debilitating perception.
To be afraid of saṃsāra is to be blessed by Consciousness ( itself.
The “awakening” derived from conviction and strength is connected with the discovery of power in the subtle body. Abhinavagupta provides us with a detailed analysis of this process in his commentary on the Parātrīśikā Tantra, when he speaks of the vital energy abiding in the middle canal of suṣumnā that becomes diffused as a vitalizing factor in the form of aliveness to all parts of the layered bodies of the individual. (Oh, that would be kuṇḍaliṇī!)
The emergent features that constitute heroic personhood.
The profile of the is that of a person of Heart, endowed with unwavering intent, a fearless attitude, firm conviction, and spiritual potency; one who always finds the courage to combat the powers of doubt — the contraction and bondage by which they are beset.
SGG || Verse 182||
I venerate the Maṇḍala of the Guru that is accompanied by the king of mantras (mantrarāja), which removes great fear and destroys the vicissitudes and suffering of reincarnation and becoming, and the poverty of consciousness. It’s the mantra of the enlightened being. . . venerated by sages and Gods. This mantrarāja is the only one that can extract you from the ocean of saṃsāra.
Imagine that the Goddess Kuṇḍalinī stands before you. In front of Her is a fire, its flames rising in jeweled colors. Imagine yourself before Her. Imagine your negative tendencies/misunderstandings as a cloak that covers your body/mind/awareness causing you to act from a limited place. Peel away the cloak, and throw it into the fire. Watch it dissolve in the flames, ash rising and sweeping over you, leaving a residue of insight and understanding.
From that residue of insight and understanding look deeper to see an even more thinly-veiled cloak, which even further obscures your knowing your true Self. Peel away the cloak, and throw it into the fire. Watch it dissolve in the flames, ash rising and sweeping over you, leaving a more luminous residue of insight and understanding. Now surrender that insight and understanding and see the profoundly subtle veiled cloak, the willfulness arising from fear and doubt. Peel away the cloak, and throw it into the fire of awareness. Watch it dissolve in the flames, ash rising & sweeping over you, leaving a direct experience of your highest essence: The experience of fullness and conviction, where no fear exists.
Fear & Doubt Become Conviction &Trust
After doing the meditation of change, tune in to the felt-sense & living essence of Conviction/Trust
Make a note describing the resonance of the experience. Wordsmith it to make sure it is a clear and concise articulation of the moment.
Create a flash card to remind you to find, enter into, and establish yourself there, moment by moment.
(You might even make a copy and post it on your refrigerator door!)