Ink Magazine; Vol. 1.2 by VCU Student Media Center

0: WHAT IS THE WHITE STUff IN BIRD POOP? A: THAT IS BIRD POOP TOO. While this is one of my favorite Kurt Vonnegut jokes, it has absolutely nothing to do with the topic at hand. With this second issue of Ink, our staff ran into a problem: How do you duplicate perfection? As we all know, our first issue has gone down in the annals of history as the best publication to ever come out of the United States (and if I may be so presumptuous, the world).

With that came all sorts of fanfare, parades, presidential commendation and much more that I shall not bore our reader with. Let's just

say that the hookers and blow were

amazing (shout out to my man Tranil). Listen: Think of all the greats that had one amazing work then retreated, who bowed under the weight of their legacy. Harper Lee and "To Kill a Mockingbird." J.D. Salinger and "Catcher In The Rye." Alien Ant Farm and "Smooth Criminal." Ink's second issue is meaner and stronger than the first. But enough self-pleasuring. Welcome to the best second issue Ink has ever put out. Po-tee-weet and so it goes ...

RICH GRISEr Executive Editor

Q: WHAT IS THf WHITf STUFF IN BIRD POOP? A: THAT IS BIRD POOP TOO. hile this is one of my :avorite Kurt Vonnegut okes, it has absolutely othing to do with the topic 3t hand. With this second Issue of Ink, our staff ran into a problem: How do you tluplicate perfection? As we all know, our first issue has gone down in the annals of history as the best publication to ever come out of the United States (and if I may be so presumptuous, the world). With that came all sorts of

amazing (shout out to my man Trani!). Listen: Think of all the greats that had one amazing work then retreated, who bowed under the weight of their legacy. Harper Lee and "To Kill a Mockingbird." J.D. Salinger and "Catcher In The Rye." Alien Ant Farm and "Smooth Criminal." Ink's second issue is meaner and stronger than the first. But enough self-pleasuring. Welcome to the best second issue Ink has ever put out. Po-tee-weet and so it goes ...

RICH GRISH Executive Editor

The Student Media Center. part of the Student Affai rs and Enrollment Services division at Virginia Commonwealth University is a resource center for recognized independent student media at VCU. Current recognized student media include POlctesme; Amendment. another literary journal; The Commonwealth Times newspaper; Ink. a quarterly magazine; and VVVCW radio.

For more information. contact VCU Student Media Center 817 W. Broad St. Richmond. VA 23284--2010. (804) 828-1058. Greg Weatherford. Director of Student Media

Q: How do I avoid the plague that

is JuicyCampus.com? A: Don't avoid it! Embace it. Use it to your advantage. Treat is as a missed connections page, but only write about yourself. Describe very specific situations in which an "admirer" (you) sees you (you, also) and lusts for your body. Everyone who reads it will think you're the hottest person on campus with all of these people crushin' on you in online posts. Q: My best friend's boyfriend just broke up with her because he thinks he might be gay. She's so upset and never saw it coming. How do I make sure the same thing doesn't happen to me? How can I make sure my boyfriend will never leave me for a skinny pants boy?

A: 12 ways to tell if your boyfriend's gay: based on real life experience .. 1 sort through 'em ... so you don't have to. 12.He calls you at night to plan coordinating (fuschia) outfits for the next day. 11. He picked out your prom dress. 10.He has told you to "just be gentle." 9. He is quick to point out that your top is "salmon," not pink. 8. He vows never to drink alcohol like all those other guys who play beer pong at parties. He's not drinking until he can afford Cristal. 7. He doesn't pay for your dinner when you go on dates so he can afford to buy himself more accessories at the mall later.

6. Your friends keep asking you, why he is so "pretty." 5. He has borrowed your clothes before. 4. He's helping you redecorate your dorm room. 3. He uses Hilary Duff lyrics to explain his feelings towards you. 2. He has a picture of Stephen from MTV's Laguna Beach as his desktop background. And the number one way to tell if your boyfriend is gay is if he ...

1. He only kisses you when you're in front of his parents. Q: I want to be smarter. Being around campus I feel like all these people are all up on what's going on the world and stuff, and I'm totally left out of intelligent group discussions. What should I do!?

A: You should probably just subscribe to a whole bunch of magazines like Newsweek, Time and Forbes and carry them under your arm so you look smart. I got my subscription to Newsweek from some possibly sketch Internet deal for like two bucks for the whole year. If you do that, you should probably just use your parents' credit card or borrow a friend's and tell them you'll pay them back; just in case it does turn out to be a scam, they won't be able to steal your identity or something crazy like that. Q: Rumor has it that "Ask Christina" is actually written by a bitter gay man. Do you have any comments on these alilgations?

A: No comment.

Need advice? Submit your questions for Christina at Ink.askchristina(a;gmail.com

VCU's Budget Crunch

-------------------MfGHAN SPfll MAN

Contributing Writer As of Fall 2009, students within the College of Humanities and Sciences at VCU will see fewer electives offered such as Minorities in Mass Media, fewer adjuncts teaching, less catered events, and possibly, higher tuition and fees, according to VCU's Director of Mass Communications Judy Turk. "The Board of Visitors, along with President Eugene P. Trani, are making day to day decisions as to what money gets cut," Turk said.

" Nearly 40 percent of our operating budget is being cut, more so in the academic areas than the nonacademic areas."

This sudden scramble to pinch pennies is a result of Gov. Tim Kaine's announcement in August to make budget cuts within the university. Having over-estimated the state budget by $234 million, Kaine decreed that all Virginia universities are required to cut costs by 5 percent, 10 percent or 15 percent within their budgets by June 2009 in any way the university deems appropriate. More budget cuts are anticipated for 2009-2010. Turk

SCANDALS, FROM P. 7 Story broke: May 2008 After taking only six credits at VCU, then Richmond Police Chief Rodney Monroe was improperly awarded a bachelor's degree in the spring of 2007. Transfer students are required to earn 30 credits from VCU. The rest of Monroe's credits were transferred from the University of Phoenix and the FBI Academy.

has more pressure on her to cut the university's budget next year more so than this year.

•••

AAA

vcu must cut costs by 5 percent, or 10.1 million dollars, by June 2009. This means administrators must find ways to reduce spending. So far, some electives and classes not needed in order to graduate have been eliminated.

The Board of Visitors is considering increasing tuition more now than ever because of the country's current economic recession. Turk said the possible tuition increase is not a direct result of the proposed budget cuts. " The Board of Visitors looks at the tuition every year," Turk said. "They

to publication, with the possibility to withhold information indefinitely. At a town hall meeting on July 16, Francis L. Macrina, vice president of research at VCU, said the secrecy that VCU had allowed with Philip Morris was a mi stake. Macrina was quoted by the Richmond Times-Dispatch as saying "It won 't happen again. We will not enter into any agreements that support secrecy." The 2006 research agreement with VCU had two parts: one to research early signs of pulmonary disease, and another to collect data on phosph orus and nitrogen runoff from Philip Morris' Park 500 water treatment plant in Chesterfield County. According to Philip Morris' Web site, there was concern in the nearby Bermuda Hundred area about the phosphorus and nitrogen ru noff. "We learned that some had concerns about the potential impact to their groundwater because they use well water and currently do not have access to Chesterfield County's public water system," the Web site stated.

In a Sept. 5, 2008 report to the Southern Association of Colleges and Schools, VCU stated that it had found 37 exceptions to protocol when it granted Monroe a bachelor's degree. Also in the report were the resignations of two deans, S. Jon Steingass and Robert D. Holsworth. Steingass was the only administrator to sign off on Monroe's application for the degree. Customarily, it takes three approvals to get a degree application through .

"To address the questions raised by the neighbors," the Web site continued, "we have arranged (for Bermuda Hundred) to extend access to Chesterfi eld County's water system at PM USA's expense."

Steingass has accepted a position in another state, and Holsworth was removed from his position of dean of the College of Humanities and Sciences. Holsworth still holds onto his title of being a special assistant to the provost.

Based on the inquiries about the agreement, VCU began to hold town hall meetings in order to discuss how the university should handle corporate sponsored research.

Linda L. Spinelli, then coordinator of the program for interdisciplinary studies, refused to sign off on the degree because Monroe had not fulfilled the proper requirements. Spinelli, who has since retired, says she was pressured to sign the degree, but refuses to say who pressured her.

While VCU only received $286,000 in research grants from Philip Morri s last year, the university received $87 million in " philanthropic " funds from Philip Morris' parent company Altria Group, Inc.

In a letter, Holsworth criticized the investigation of the degree, and said the investigator used intimidation in questioning Robyn D. Lacks, an assistant professor of criminal justice at VCU. The investigator supposedly told Lacks the board and the chairman of the academic affairs committee knew that she was up for tenure, and that her cooperation in the investigation would play into her tenure review. Rodney Monroe is currently the chief of police of the Charlotte-Mecklenburg Police Department.

Story broke: Jan. 28, 2009 VCU Police Chief William "Willie" B. Fuller was arrested Jan. 28 for a chat room conversation with an undercover cop who was posing as a 14-year-old girl. Fuller, 50, allegedly used the screen name "Hotcop2006," and tried to solicit pictures of the 14-year-old's genitalia. He is facing four felony charges. Fuller really was chatting with Chesterfield County police Detective Keith Vincent. The investigation began Jan. 10.

Story broke: May 22, 2008 On May 22, 2008 the New York Times wrote in a front page story that VCU was involved in a highly restrictive research agreement with the nation's largest tobacco company Philip Morris USA. In this agreement, Philip Morris retained all rights to review and approve all research conducted for them by VCU prior

Fuller's arraignment was Jan. 29 at Chesterfield Juvenile and Domestic Relations District Court, and Fuller appeared via closed-circuit television from his jail cell. VCU officials have put Fuller on administrative leave without pay, and have named Capt. Carlton Edwards as acting police chief. Fuller was released Jan. 30 on a $10,000 bail under the condition not to use the Internet. Fuller 's preliminary hearing will be held April 2.

make cha ng es to it every six o r

seven years."

VCU has t he lowest stud ent tuiti on in Virginia- full-t ime, in-st ate stud ents livi ng o n campus with d ining plans pay approx imatel y $14,693. VCU's 32,OOO-student po pul ation is t he

- - ---

largest population of any university in Virg inia, yet unive rsity officia ls say the in co me f ro m tuiti o n and fees aren't enough. Would st udents be o pposed to a tuit io n increase if thi s were o ne way ch osen to dea l w ith the stat ew ide ordered budget cut s? Junior crimina l justice major Krist en Palmer rolls her eyes at t he thought of in creas ing tuitio n. " Increas ing the sc hoo l's t uit ion is o nly g o ing to make it hard er for

people t o get int o co llege because most people already need loa ns," Palmer sa id. " If mo re peo pl e st art asking fo r loa ns, that need is g o ing to make it harder to get loans period. Then w hat w ill stud ents and families do?"

Mawye r be lieves t he st ate's need t o imp leme nt budget cuts w ithin t he uni versities refl ects a natio nal t rend . "Unl ess t here's a remarkab le change in o ur current econo mic situ atio n, these cuts w ill remain in p lace," Mawyer sa id.

" Fo r every dollar we cut th is year, we have t o cut three d o llars next yea r," Turk sa id. "Thi s yea r was difficult beca use o ur fisca l yea r st art ed in July, and we alread y had a number of co mmitments by October, the time o ur department was t o ld by th e universit y to make cutbacks." " Higher educatio n has t aken a big hit (d uring t his period of economic crisis)," sa id Ca ro l Mawyer, ass ist ant direct o r of th e School o f Mass Com municatio ns.

Anyone who has gone away to school knows that the tours and information packets don't tell nearly enough. Each school is unique in their traditions, from what you can see on ESPN to the underground groups that not even everyone on campus knows about. In response to this, a list was composed to enlighten members of this society.

You know you're a CU student when The upperclassmen dorms are always full; not that you know anyone who'd want to live there, anyway. You r RA does liquor runs for the entire floor. You've had a fire drill at night, more than once in a day, on move-in day, in the pouring rain, during f inals week or all of the above. There are art classes above the parking deck and a boo kstore below the parking deck. You don't question either. A half-naked girl doing lines in the bathroom doesn't deserve a second look. Som eone breaks something on the busted sidewalks and nobody says anything. Your class schedule says that you need to go to B0 7W F and no one has any idea what that is or where that is, including the professor. So meone gets hit by a car, and nobody says anyt hing.

Officials w ithin th e School of Mass Communi catio ns are cutting bac k as mu ch as they ca n in every area they ca n. " We're simply having t o resort t o fewe r peopl e d oing mo re things," Mawyer sa id. "That 's all there is t o it." Accord ing to Turk, t he university is do ing all it ca n t o ensure that it remains financiall y sou nd.

other people. You had more than 100 meals left on your dining plan at the end of the semester. Godfrey's is the only thing to really do on Wednesday night, even if you're straight. You know there's clubs in Richmond, you just don't know where they are.

You know that Johnson Hall made the High Times list of places to score pot. The roads are iced over, nobody can get into the city, everything off-campus is closed, but you STILL have to walk half a mile to class because it's not canceled. The hobos know your name and bug you for specific amounts of money. You've seen either hobo make-out sessions or hobo fist fights. You've participated in debates over which 40 oz. is the best. The Commons is a great place to nap or cram for a test, but not a whole lot else. Even if VCU had a football team, you wouldn't go to the games because they'd be so far away.

You've been invited to an 80s party at least once a week since you were a freshman. You know Belle Isle is closed at night, but it's never stopped you. You've bribed someone to drop a class you needed, because it was full. Half of your kitchen came from our $18 million dining facility (built to decrease theft). The school doesn't care if you screw your professors. Believe me. You can distinguish ambulance, police and fire truck sirens, and tell how far away they are. You went out to party the night Richmond made the top five most dangerous cities in the United States. MCV is a strange hospital and should be avoided. You know the location offive or more 7-11's.

$400 a month gets you a room in a house with holes in the walls, broken windows and no heat or

7-11 is closed ... because of a hold up.

AC.

You don't carry cash.

The Worst of 2008 lACK BUD8YK + FRIC KOlJCHf8AVY Coiurnn lst + Il lustrator

In light of the fact that I'm a bleeding-heart liberal (and also that I found "Indiana Jones 4" hugely entertaining), you might not think that this past year has gIVen me a lat to camplain abaut. To which I say, dear reader who. asked yau? Yes, 2008 hit plenty af high notes, but it had its share af crap that it tracked in tao. And if theres one thing that appeals to me as much as excessive negativity, its putting that negativity into. neat little lists, With that In mind, despite yaur rudeness in assuming the year was awesame for me, I give yau .. the ten most despicable human beings of 2008

10. Ben Stein

partners in the war against terrorism." OK.

Between this guy and the outing of Jeffrey "Principal Rooney" Jones as a fan of kiddie porn, it's apparent that everyone involved in the production of "Ferris Bueller's Day Off" has serious problems, and I expect an announcement that Matthew Broderick is a cannibal any day now.

Inspirational quote: "I knew the politics of fraud and deceit led to frustration and violence. I was therefore determined to guide the nation from the dead-end of kleptocracy, masquerading as democracy, to the promise of participatory democracy and good governance."

Stein shouldn't have been that surprising since he started out as a Nixon adviser, but his ass hat quotient has been recently raised to astonishing heights. This is due in large part to his Christian right-pandering "documentary" titled "Expelled: No Intelligence Allowed," in which he tries to prove, using a grab bag of straw men, baseless claims, and deliberately slanted information, that there is a witch hunt against educators who question the theory of evolution.

8. Jim Bob and Michellf Duggar

As many a critic pointed out, Stein apparently misses the irony of making a documentary about views being silenced and presenting it in the most misleading, one-sided manner possible. Inspirational quote: "Scientists were the people in Germany telling Hitler that it was a good idea to kill all the Jews. Scientists were telling Stalin it was a good idea to wipe out the middle-class peasants. Scientists were telling Mao Tse-tung it was fine to kill 50 million people in order to further the revolution."

9. Pervez Musharraf The Pakistani president's resignation just became official in August, and in the meantime he proved to be the kind of petty demi-fascist who wants to be George Bush when he grows up. After his coup in 1999, he has suspended the constitution under a writ of "Cuz I Said So" twice, and literally altered it to remove his term limits. Opposition leader Benazir Bhutto's opposition to his perceived abuses of power was halted by her assassination in December 2007, which he almost certainly had a connection to. And there was his administration's wiring of $100,000 to lead 9/11 hijacker Mohammed Atta. What do you think, Condoleezza Rice? Oh, he's "one of the world's most committed

It's difficult to discern whether the 'picturesquely named Jim Bob and his Stepford wife have less regard for women or children, but they exploit both to grotesque effect. They follow the so-called " Quiverfull" ideology, a.k.a. " be nutty as fruitcakes and multiply," which promotes having insane amounts of children so more fundamentalist yahoos will walk the earth, a feat they have achieved 17 times . Some 'wad at TLC gave them a reality show, and the result is something like a more heartwarming Firefly family. "That's great," you say, "but I still don't think I hate them enough." Well, they also gave ALL their kids the first initial J. "Ah, that's the ticket." Inspirational quote: (from their official Web site) "We want to be quick to say, we are still learning by God's grace & we do not consider ourselves 'Professional Parents.' " Then, um, stop having kids, guys. Seriously.

7. Rep. Michele Bachmann Minnesota Congresswoman Bachmann is that rare Republican politician too stupid to try to conceal her fascist agenda; she recently gained nationwide notoriety for telling Chris Matthews, "I wish the American media would take a great look at the views of the people in Congress and find out, are they pro-America or anti-American." Bachmann reacted with shock - SHOCK - I tell you when media figures implied that her endorsement of McCarthyist tactics was an endorsement of McCarthyist tactics.

"And I, Michele Bachmann will make sure that all dinosaurs in science class will be referred to as 'Jesus Horses.' "

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Needless to say, she's also a huge proponent of teaching creationism in public schoo ls; although her level of intelligence makes her a great way to f igure out exactly what we SHOULDN'T teach kids. Insp irational quote: A picture's worth a thousand words:

http://ericblackink.minnpost.com/wp-content/ uploads/oct._07/ bac hmann_and_bush_kiss.jpg

6. Michael Savage This San Francisco-based right-wing frother is for people who like the inane, reactio nary opinions of Rush Limbaugh and Sean Hannity, but think t he sentences they put them in are overly coherent. Savage, nee Wiener, puts his reprehensible bigotry in words in a manner normally reserved for schizophrenic winos. This past year, he spit his venom on groups as diverse as homosexuals, blacks and autistic kids ("a fraud, a racket") . Every time Savage makes a particu larly hateful remark, he loses a few more advertisers, but both he and his fans are far too rabid for him to die. Insp irationa l quote: "I'll tell you why I detested (deceased U.S. Rep.) Tom Lantos. The man survived the Holocaust of World War II and used it as a weapon the rest of his life." Plea se note: Michael Savage has compared the firing of Don Imus to the Holoca ust.

5. Rod Blagojevich Already scandal-ridden before his home state's senator was elected president, former governor of Illinois Blagojevich was recently implicated in an attempt to sell an appointment to Obama's now-vacant Senate seat. Judging by the ease with which Patrick Fitzgerald is finding t he evidence against him, he's also so sloppy at disposing of evidence he makes Nixon look like The Wolf from " Pulp Fiction."

"Say, Zack," you say. "Did you hear they caught VCU Chief of Police Willie Fuller in an online predator sting recently?" "No," I reply, in my best David Hyde-Pierce voice. "You see, I have spent the last month in a cave, on Mars, with my eyes shut and my fingers in my ears." Then, just to show how much contempt I have for your assumption that I'm out of touch, I would sit down and write something like the following, sung to the tune of "Gee, Officer Krupke" from "West Side Story" Deeeeear kindly Mr. Fuller, You gotta help us out; We ain't heard nothing crueler Than what this is about. They say you hit on ladies, Except this one's a kid, Please, oh, please, just tell us if you did! Oh, Officer Fuller, just give us a clue; We'd hate to have to hang an awful label on you. Although you might seem like one deviant dude, Deep down inside you, you're a prude. (He's a prude!) He's a prude, he's a prude, he's a prude prude prude; In his heart the chief, he is a prude. Dear undercover copper, He got you on the horn; He made like Dennis Hopper And dealt out verbal porn. He thought you were a minor, But you had took the piss, Goodness gracious, what the hell is this? Oh, Officer Fuller, she said she's fourteen; You need to take your brain out and apply Mr. Clean; You must now be wond'ring, what are you to do? Gee, Officer Fuller, V-C you!

" Disaster Movie." Taking the reins from the occasionally entertaining "Scary Movie" franchise, they decided that making references to more popular movies was clever on its own, never mind making a joke out of it. There are three jokes in any movie by these losers:

Much like a certain person further down this list, Blagojevich united members of both major parties in shaking their heads and saying, "What a dumbass."

-Character from other movie shows up. I know, right? I totally recognize them!

Inspirational quote: " They're not willing to give me anything except appreciation. Fuck them."

-Nutshot.

4. Jason Friedberg and Aaron Seltzer These two are the guys behind not one, but two of the runniest cinematic pieces of crap of the past year: " Meet the Spartans" and

-Gay joke.

And do you know why these movies keep getting made? Because the same morons that wouldn 't go to undeserved failures like "Walk Hard" and "Grind house" flock to this crap's opening weekend on their way to scalp Dane Cook tickets. Inspirational quote: (character from " Disaster Movie") "I AM MclOVER!"

............................................................................................ BUDRYK, SEE P.13

BUDRYK, FROM P.ll Because, see, it's like Mclovin', from that movie people actually liked, o nly ... screw it. Just ... go away. [Weeps]

3. Joe "The Plumber" Wurzelbacher Eve rything this guy has done has only proved how full of crap he is. Amateur plumber and The Thing look-alike Wurzelbacher first came t o prominence when, during then Sen. Barack Obama's visit to his hometown, he interrogated him about his tax plan, which would raise Wurzelbacher's taxes (but not really) once he started a small business (that he wasn't actually planning on starting). Like his contemporary Rush Limbaugh, Joe also spoke out against welfare now that he was no lo nger benefiting from it.

Unfortunately for him and fortunately for us, McCain ran his campaign so crappily he couldn't have beat Lyndon B. Johnson in a re-election bid, and also created a Frankenstein monster of a running mate who soon made the base forget he was even on the ticket. Also, his habit of peppering his sentences with "my friends" just gave us disturbing visions of President Sweeney Todd. Inspirational quote: " It was an energy bill on the floor of the Senate loaded down with goodies, billions for the oil companies, and it was sponsored by Bush and Cheney. You know who voted for it? You might never know. (Pointing to Barack Obama) That one."

1. Gov. Sarah Palin Speculation went that John McCain's running mate would be a former competitor like Mike Huckabee or Mitt Romney, or a colleague like Sen. Joe Lieberman or Sen. Lindsay Graham. Instead, he plucked freshman Alaska governor Sarah "Bible Spice" Palin from obscurity (and her supporting role on TV's "The Sopranos" as Dr. Jennifer Melfi). It soon became apparent that Palin was a combination of a bone thrown to people who thought McCain was insufficiently bigoted and a misogynistic, condescending assumption that former Clinton supporters would vote for anything with breasts. From there, I'm not sure what was more astonishing: that even with Palin's short career in politics, she still had a history of disgraceful policies (perhaps the worst of which was making raped women cover the costs of their medical examinations after being sexually assaulted), or that she immediately began adding to her resume of suck with such now- infamous moments as her claim that living within close proximity to Russia gave her

No, this is not Joe the Plummer winning a Pulitzer, this is him winning the Michael Chiklis look-alike contest. Name-dropping him in the final presidential debate, Sen. John McCain decided the unlicensed plumber was a perfect political tool, to d emonstrate how committed he was to the average American workingman, provided said workingman is a tax cheat. Revoltin' Joe also demonstrated his good old blue-collar racism with an offhand reference to Obama as Sammy Davis Jr. Li ke Gov. Sarah Palin and pretty much everyone else on the McCain ca mpaign that isn't John McCain, Joe refuses to just GO AWAY, announcing his work on a book (presumably with lots of pictures) and a country album (for people who think Merle Haggard's " Fightin' Side of Me" is too intellectually overbearing). Inspirational quote: "I'm not sorry that we're in Iraq ... We've liberated another country. I mean, you know, freedom ... I don't know if you g uys are Chrtstians or not, but it's like someone coming to Jesus and becoming saved."

2. Sen. John McCain The man who could have been our next president somehow had the gall to run on the very accomplishments he had already renounced in service of more votes. The reason McCain has ever been known as a maverick was his defiance of the religious right, whose clenched sp hincters he jumped headlong into when he realized they might happily go third party on his ass. Oh, and there was his brave, principled o pposition to torture of detainees, as illustrated by his vote against a resolution banning waterboarding in military rules of engagement.

Yes, this meeting of John McCain, Sarah Palin and Joe Lieberman post-election IS as awkward as it seems. foreign policy experience, and her claim that the vice-president is "in charge of the Senate." Toward the end she became the campaign's attack dog, drawing hateful, death-threat-happy crowds of supporters, and delivering an artful shiv to McCain's hunched shoulders via her grandstanding. Her teenage daughter's unplanned pregnancy, while politically irrelevant, is nonetheless hilarious. If you didn't have a reason not to vote for McCain, just remember he put this woman in a position to push "The Button." Inspirational quote: (In response to a question about the use of "Under God" in the Pledge of Allegiance). "Not on your life. If it was good enough for the founding fathers, its good enough for me and I'll fight in defense of our Pledge of Allegiance."

HOW TO Bf AKINOfRGARTfN HO PIPPA CURRAN On a recent consumerlstic venture to Baby Gap, a tragedy in and of Itself, I was horrified to discover what clothing society deems appropriate for little girls. I was sent on a mission to acquire new underwear for my five-year-old niece, only to discover that panties are extinct. They had a wall full of boy briefs, bikinis and thong underwear, but no regular, full coverage brlefs. Bear in mind that this is Baby Gap - for children under

6. Disgusted, I stomped over to the disturbingly perky sales clerk In the hopes that I was simply missing them. With vacant eyes and a bright smile, this vapid young woman Informed me that the briefs had been discontinued. I went off on a rant of biblical proportions. The clerk smiled and said she thought they were all cute and she liked the bikini briefs the best. Dear Gaia, she was not very bright. Stunned into silence, I sulked back to the dressing room and watched my niece try on clothes. I wondered what kind of a world she has to look forward to. Why Is it necessary to put little girls In very adult underwear? What purpose does It serve? As an adult woman, I don't feel the need to have my ass flossed ••. at least not on a dally basis anyway. I can't Imagine a five year old feeling so compelled. If you have spent any am nt of time with children, you will realize that they pull and pluck at themselves Incessantly. Thong and bikini underwear only adds to the problem. Also neither are overly comfortable, and any woman who says otherwise Is lying. Chaffing is always a matter of concern. Women wear bikini and thong underwear for one purpose: sex. We wear it when we think we are going to have sex, or to feel sexy - for those who wear underwear that Is. There Is zero practicality In It. So why do we feel the need to have little girls wear them? The problem most certainly does not end with

undergarments. The clothing that is available for little girls is just as distressing. Low cut tops, mini skirts, sparkles, and sequins. There are even heels for girls as young as three. Heels! I can only imagine how many little girls have broken an ankle on the monkey bars while wearing heels. What happened to Mary Janes and Keds? There has even been an expansion of make-up for little girls. They have complete lines geared towards children. Beauty pageants, replete with swimsuit competitions. are the most painful example of what Is wrong. They treat little girls as women. They are tUCked, eoifed, and slathered In make-up that puts Tammy Faye to shame. More frightening yet, do we, as a society, truly find that attractive? What message does this send to our little girls? You are not good enough, not beautiful enough unless you paint your face, starve and mutilate your body and dress like a whore. More Importantly, you will never get a man unless you fit SOCiety's definition of beautiful ... so conform. Children are not stupid. They pull cues from their environment and absorb everything. It does not take long for little girls to put two and two together. They then Internalize this and It becomes the basis of their self-worth, Identity, expression and ultimately their sexuality. It's no wonder that America has the highest Incidence of eating disorders and nearly twice the number of teenage pregnancies of any other Industrialized nations. We are teaching our little girls to be Kindergarten hoes!

I'm certain you are wondering who Is to blame. I bet you expect me to say men, don't you. Wrong. In essence, we are all to blame. Each and every one of us contributes to this nonsensical bullshlt In one way or another. However, my contention remains that It is women who are more to blame for the current whorificatlon of our daughters. Women are typically responsible for dressing children, especially little girls. It Is not men who buy these

clothes. In fact, It Is women who constitute the bulk of the American buying power. If women would stop buying seductive clothes and stripper heels for their toddlers, they would no longer make them. The collective conscious Is a powerful thing and has the capacity to affect Immense social change. Women, you have a strong voice ••• USEIT! As I bring this bitter diatribe to a close, I do not want to be perceived as a prude. I'm the farthest thing from It. I love sex. A lot! I just don't think we should be sexualizing little girls. Children should be

allowed to be children, little girls. Women have to contend with as they I want little girls to healthy childhood. A clnlldhoCld'lIi from the anxiety and an adult life. They to worry about being ........'-',thin, not pretty enough, enough and certainly not enough. They will have time and opportunity for that In life. There Is a very smaH In a woman's life where she free from all of that. Let's not that away.

Staff W, Iter Miles Quillen and long "OJ Long Jawns" Phung are no strangers on how to throw a rager. The two entertainers rock dance floors so hard

they cave in, sometimes literally. As a promoter, Quillen, an interior design graduate, works on the business and planning side of things. DJ Long Jawns gets behind the decks and spins all the hits. Here are some of their tips on how to rage appropriatley. 1. Make sure your building is structurally sound: Did you hear about the balcony collapse on West Cary Street in November? Guess who the oblivious architects of that disaster were? "That's his fault, man," Quillen says, pointing to Long.

Quillen and Phung were simply there to have a good time and were fortunate enough to have left moments before it happened. They can be partially blamed for packing the rotting dance floor thanks to slick text-messagi ng and Facebooking. 2. If you care about something, put it away: This includes sofas. Quillen and Phung say they've never had anything stolen from their own parties. Common protocol is to clean out the entire room, even the sofa, which will simply become another obstacle. 3. Imagine the worst possible scenario and prepare accordingly: "When we'd have a party, the upstairs would be completely closed off except to super-close, personal friends who knew who had the keys," Quillen said. Smaller things like turning off the sprinklers if there's smoking or covering windows if cops are expected seem minuscule, but are crucial for success. 4 . Word travels fast: " For house parties, I'll just tell one person to come," Phung says. "I'll just put the address up on my (Facebook) status or something or I'll just say, 'You gotta find it:" Remember: You're only a text message away from inviting mass pandemonium into your house on a Friday night. 5. All cops just wanna have fun: "You gotta know how to talk to cops ... The cops just want respect," Phung says. "Afterwards, you get to have another beer while they have to go back out on the street." "The last party we had in our place before the landlord cracked down on us, I counted 12 cop cars, a sheriff, two fire marshals and three paddy wagons," Quillen said. "I went downstairs to listen through the mail slot and heard three of them-exact words: 'Fuck it. Let's go to the next party: They're just trying to have fun too, I think."

Definition of a Stoplight Party:

A pa,ty whe,e guests

wear the the colors of the traffic signal to denote their relationship status: green means they're single, red means they're taken, and yellow means their relationship status is "complicated" - www.urbandictionary.com

Karen Seifert photos

ink 02·09

STRIPPING THROUGH

COLLEGE AMANDA PITTMAN Staff Wrltel In today's economy findi ng wo rk has become nearly imposs ible. In the beginning of the recession most students hardly noticed. We arri ved at school wit h cash in our pockets left over from ou r summer jobs. bu t when it was gone and ou r parents d idn't want to contr ib ute to ou r late night Chik-fil-a b inges. we had to find anot her sou rce of income. For t he lucky o nes that meant retail or fli pping burgers. Fo r the not so lucky it meant reso rt ing to w hatever they could. or simp ly hope that mommy and daddy would put them up for a whi le. For some students, late night entertainment seemed like a viable al ternat ive. For o ne student it was her only opt ion She wea rs a hoodie and jea ns like every other college student. She attends class and studies like every other co ll ege st udent. No o ne would ever guess that this English major spends her nights in a strip club wh il e everyone else is at a party in Oregon Hil l Tara (her stage nam e) is a sen io r at VCU who aspires to be a hig h schoo l Eng lish teacher. She came to Richmond last semeste r in the hopes o f atten d ing VCU on fi na ncial aid and scho la rsh ips , Due to a d rop in her GPA she lost some of her financia l aid and was in need of a job to make up t he diffe rence. Tara had come to VCU one cred it short of being a sopho m ore due to taking AP and d ual -enro llment c lasses in high sc hoo l Because her mother is a socia l worker, Tara knew that she would have to pu t hersel f through college. Still Jobless after the fi rst two mo nt hs of schoo l she looked to stripping as a last resort "When I real ized, 'Sh it! No one else is hiring VCU students!' it got pretty bad. " Tara sa id. "I moved in August and could not find a job, All of August. all of September, I tried but ma nagers kept telli ng me to come back, come back, come back. I was finally li ke, "I've been com ing back , w hen is your boss go ing to be here?' , Ti red of getting t he ru naround, Tara dec ided to do so methi ng d rastic. "I went down to Clu b Velvet. There are VCU teachers that work there- they' re not dancers, they're host esses," Tara said. After find ing out from Club Velvet that they weren't hiring, Tara decided to aud it ion at Richa rd's Rendevous

She got the job, and a new source o f reven ue Rol lo, t he DJ at Richard's is used to seei ng g irl s in Tara's situation. "I've been working here fo r t welve years and girls come and go all t he time," Rollo said. "Tara is pretty new, we see girls like her more in the summer. A lot of college girls will work here in t he summer," Tara is pleased with t he amount o f money she br ings home ' I'm maki ng so much more than m inimum wage." Tara said. "I'm work ing twelve to fifteen hours a week and mak ing t hree to four hundred dollars a week. When you break it down, it's a lot.'· St ripping sta rts out soundi ng like a p retty good break, b ut after payi ng t he "house" or club fee to dance, and tippi ng t he DJ. you don't always take home w hat you thought yo u wo uld. Everyt hing a dancer ea rns comes from t ips "You have a DJ fee and a ho use fee," Ta ra said. "The house fee is always ten do llars and you have to pay that every t ime you work and t he DJ fee is at least ten do llars , Basically it 's 10 percent of what yo u make. If yo u m ake less tha n a hund red dollars yo u st ill have to t ip him ten. I've heard of girls wa lking out w ith on ly t wo dollars, but sometimes you can make over two hundred in a shift (and) the shifts are o nly two and ha lf to t hree hours long." Even wi t h t he short hou rs and t ips, str ip ping does n't come wit hou t cost. On one of my visits a group of t hree me n came in and sat in front of Tara. After she casua ll y addressed them , as she does al l of t he patrons, they started saying crude thi ngs and pegging dollar bills at her. They may have t ho ug ht it was just ified - they were tipping her - but scrunching up t he bi ll s and t hrow ing them is prohibi ted . It on ly took a moment for the bou ncer to not ice and escort them out of the club. "Guys like t hat come in here a lot. I have to keep an extra eye on them," sa id Danie l, a bouncer who works

one depend ing o n w here yo u're sitting. "'They're us ing us and we're us ing them, but it's somethi ng that you have to be aware o f wa lki ng in there. I'm going to have to give him wha t he wants or he's not go ing to pay me "

construct ion d uring the day. "We have to take care o f o ur girls" Despite insta nces like this , Tara does n't find dancing degrading. 'It depends on where you wo rk," Tara said. "An estab lishment ca n m ake you or b reak you as a da nce r, It·s not d eg radi ng at all. It 's Just the opposite fo r me." Whe n t hinki ng about her profession, she li kes to compa re herself to a Japanese geis ha "Ge isha were mea nt to entertain men, especia ll y t he high c la ss o nes. They were t here to ta unt and tease, they were that exot ic fantasy that married me n just could n't have. They were a symbol of beau ty and prestige and power. It's manipulat ion and controL" Stripping is a symbiot ic rela tionship t hat can easily be interpreted as a parasit ic

Stripp ing is a p rofess ion easy to get t rapped in as many get used to the q ui ck cas h and fo rget their prev ious life plans "You can't do it just for the money, if you do you' ll end up jaded just li ke these women that have been doi ng it for years , You start to worry about pay ing bil ls and that comes t hrough when yo u dance. Peo ple can p ick it up in your body la ng uage and how you commun icate wit h them. You're not just there danc ing, you have to make eye contact" Tara hopes to one d ay write about her stripp ing experiences ''There are so many t hings that as a writer you see d ifferent ly about t he wo rld. Basica lly I want to dispel a lot of myths about it because a lot of people are like, 'Oh, you're a stripper, tha t 's shady,' you know a negative con notation, and it's not"

iM02·09

It's 1:50 on a Sunday afternoon. I just got out of ch urc h and am on my way to Studio X for open house strippercise. What have I gotten myself into? Somehow, the idea of taking a strippercise cla ss seemed better in theory. I've always had a problem sticking to workout regimes. I usually go to the gym for about two weeks and then stop. Alternative forms of exercising such as strippercise, as I like to call it, seem like they have a better chance of holding my attention opposed to the boring and monotonous gym. I've heard that pole dancing (I believe this is the technical term) ca n be a really good workout while maintaining the fun factor. The closer I get to the studio the more nervous I become. I had no idea what it's going to be like, who is going to be there and how much I would emba rrass myself. As soon as I arrive I'm greeted by the owner, Kate. To my surprise I was the only one th ere. I wasn't sure if that was a good thing or a bad thing. On one end, no one was around to laugh at me bust my ass on the pole, and on the other, the instructors would focus all their attention on me: scary! After a while a few more ladies began to trickle in. Finally it's time to start. In the open house the instructors demonstrate three classes : Live Sexy, Exotic Dance and Brass Class. Although it's nice t o get a demonstration of all three classes, I really just ca me for Brass Class. Desp ite my lack of interest for the first two cla sses the instructors made it enjoyable. Kate's exotic dance demonstration was hilarious and awkward all at the same time. Marvin Gaye's " Let 's Get It On" and LL Cool J's "Doin' It" filled the air as she danced around the floor. Hair whips, booty pops, caressing hands, humps and gyrations. Something tells me exotic dancing isn't quite for me. I mean, my name's Godsgrace,

there's only so much I can take. It's a little too erotic, but in a tasteful way. Brass Class, on the other hand, is more like an acrobatic tango with a pole. Kat, our skinny blonde instructor fully dressed in skimpy Studio X-wear and plastic red platform heels, glides around the pole with a demonstration that is sure to get a shitload of tips at any club. She climbs up the pole and flips herself upside down while stretching one leg out. Balancing on the other leg she slides down the pole and onto the floor where she continues to dance seductively, and all with impeccable grace. It's clear that she won't be teaching that in this session. The time has come to put the pole dancing workout to the test. The first thing I learned was the hook spin. With one hand on the pole I walk around it and grab it with my other hand. I hook one leg around the pole, lift the other leg up and spin all while maintaining a nice triangle form with my legs. Yes, I'm a natural (at least at the basics)! Upon returning for further research I get a little intimidated by the current class. But if 60-yearold Sue can climb the pole with the best of them, who am I to back down? Kat shows me a few more tricks and poses, but then things get a little more serious. She asks if I want to climb the pole! That seems a little advanced for me. Alii could think about was the liability waiver they had me sign. God, please don't let me fall off!!! Following Sue's advice (always listen to grandma), I oblige. Lifting one leg up onto the pole and holding the pole with both hands I lift myself up and cross the other leg around. I'm supposed to hold myself up and balance by holding the pole between my thighs. I did it! Well, at least for a minute after which I had to drop down. Somehow, I don't think I have quite the grace Kat does. She makes it look as simple as climbing a ladder. However, it requires upper arm

core abdominal strength that I do not yet possess. And then ... Ass in Brass. Simply put, Ass in Brass is where you put the pole between your ass cheeks. Let 's just say I'm not of a fan of brass, or anything else for that matter, in or around my ass. But I' ll let you make your own decision on that one. All in all, I had a good time pole dancing. It was fun way to workout, and you actually keep all of your clothes on. By the end I was pretty comfortable and ready to learn more, but this was just a demo and I have to buy classes to learn more. Despite being a broke college student in the middle of a recession, I was still tempted to enroll. Ladies if you're looking for a new, exciting way to workout pole dancing is the way to go. Maybe you could even convince your boyfriend to pay for th e classes. My verdict : A+ P.S. - Sorry guys. ladies only except for couples class and the rentable pnvate room

START!

Board game instructions For all that ca n be said about VCU, it would be hard to refute t hat our

wonderful univerl To celebrate all 01 Ink has devised a you ca n go from in a matter of

Freshman

You were towed by Seibert 5 Towing Move back foU! spac~s

Portfolio didn't go Wtlll go back to AFO.

(start)

START!

Board game instructions For all that can be said about VCU, it would be hard to refute that our

campus' quirks, rd game in which ,,,~r,m;.n to graduate The rules of the

how far around the board you go, then follow the words of the space you land on. Feel free to make additions to the rule (maybe every time you land on a worded space you take a shot).

Freshman

Matt Schmidt illustration

CI)

.t: I '

Board Game FINISH!

You were towed by Seibert sTowing Move back foU! spac~s

Portfolio didn't go w~1I go back to AFO.

(start)

a Crazy fundamentalists tell you you're going to hell. Punch one in the face and lose a turn.

Y~u got away with stealing glasses from

Shafer, move up three spaces.

You just miss the Campus Connector and have to walk back to MCV. Go back three spaces.

Senior

lacks character. camp us' quirks, game in which to graduate The rules of the a die to figure out

how far around the board you go, then follow the words of the space you land on. Feel free to make additions to the rule (maybe every time you land on a worded space you take a shot).

Matt Schmidt illustration

....

Board Game FINISH!

Junior

-A.r=t

CO"

'"d.m,m."," "II YO' yo,'"

going to hell. Punch one in the face and lose a turn.

got awaywith stealing glasses from Shafer, move up three spaces.

You just miss the Campus Connector and have to walk back to MCV. Go back three spaces.

Senior

RENTERS RIGHTS f8MCfS C088fA Senior Reporler Once freshman year is over and dorm life is far behind them, most students step into the world of off-campus living. Janet Portman, attorney and author of "Renters' Rights," says that one of the biggest problems students have as first-time tenants is "not understanding their rights and responsibilities," Portman says that students often don't understand that "they're in someone else's property where there are a whole new set of rules." The Virginia Residential Landlord and Tenant Act covers the most important rights and responsibilities of a tenant. Here are just a few rights that every tenant should know when living in an apartment. The Virginia Cooperative Extension provided this information.

'I' 11

1. You have the right to privacy. All information that your landlord has about you must be kept confidential, unless the information is: a. Public record. b. Your payment record , including the amount. c. A copy of a non-compliance notice that has been remedied. d. Requested in a civil case, using a subpoena. e. Requested by a law-enforcement or public safety agent or purchaser of the property (as long as the purchaser agrees to confidentiality). f. Is provided in case of emergency. 2. You have the right to be notified of any changes in ownership or management. Your landlord must provide six months notice if there is a plan of eviction because of any drastic changes or construction to the property. 3. You have the right to live in a decent and safe environment. Your apartment must meet at local building and health codes. In addition, your landlord must keep your apartment in livable condition. This includes: a. Making all necessary repairs. b. Keeping common areas shared by two or more apartments on the property safe and clean. c. Keeping all electrical, plumbing, sanitary, heating, ventilating and air-conditioning units in good and safe working conditions. d. Working to prevent the accumulation of moisture and the growth of mold. e. Maintaining and provide quality trashcans and trashcan pick-ups in common areas of the apartments. f. Supplying a reasonable amount of hot vyater, air-conditioning, heat and running water. 4. The amount of rent you pay cannot be changed until that lease expires. If you rent on a monthly basis, the landlord must provide 30-day

written notice of any changes in rent. 5. Your security deposit needs to be fair. Your landlord cannot require a security deposit in an amount more than two month's rent. You must receive your security deposit within 45 days of moving out. The landlord must provide an itemized list of any deductions. 6. You have the freedom of speech. Your landlord cannot take any action against you for making any complaints or joining any renter's organization. If they do, you can sue in small claims court. Joining a renter's organization is a good way to get your landlord to start listening. There is strength in numbers.

1. Keep the lease. The lease is a binding contract to which you are held liable whether or not you keep it. Have it around as a reference if anything should come up. The terms of the lease can only be changed if both parties have written consent. 2. Exchange a record of all damages. Your landlord must give you a list with all damages in the apartment. After the list is exchanged, you have five days to make any changes, after which the list is considered binding. Any damages on the list after you move out are your responsibility. 3. You must allow your landlord to enter your apartment if he or she has good reason for doing so. Reasons include: a. Property inspection. b. Making repairs or decoration. c. Making improvements or alterations. d. Providing necessary services. e. Showing the apartment to tenants, workmen, contractors, prospective or actual purchasers and mortgagees. Your landlord can enter in an emergency situation without of your consent. The landlord can only enter during the daytime, except in

emergency situations. Other than emergencies, your landlord must tell you in advance if they plan to enter your apartment. 4. Keep your apartment in a good condition. This includes: a. Keeping the apartment as clean and safe as you can. b. Disposing of trash, ashes and waste into the appropriate containers. c. Providing written and dated notice of any needed repairs as soon as possible. d. Using all utilities in a responsible manner. e. Being responsible of the behavior of ALL persons in the apartment. f. Following all reasonable rules of the landlord.

Allow any of the property to be deliberately damaged or removed.

If you are a member of the military on full-time duty, you may terminate your lease early without being charged with termination fees or damages. Information for this article was culled from www.

exl.vt!pubs!family!354-066!354-066!htm#L2. This information does not substitute legal advice. For further advice concerning your rights and responsibilities as a tenant, try talking to offcampus student services or a lawyer. Off-campus services can provide guidance about how to make formal complaints and what to do if your not being heard.

For more information on your rights as a tenant, seek legal advice. Housing Opportunity Made Equal of Virginia, Inc.

(804) 354-0461 Virginia Legal Aid Justice Office

(804) 643-1086 info@justice4all.org

VCU's Van Gogh A professor stumbles upon a masterpiece Anderson GaUery. In 2000, Moorefield had the printing authenticated by the Van Gogh Museum in Amsterdam, Netherlands. The printing now is locked up in the Anderson GaUery. It was last on display in 2006.

RICH GRISEr Executive Editor In 1990, professor Cliff Edwards was waiting in the lobby of the VCU President's House when he spotted something on the wall that seemed out of place. Upon closer inspection, he knew what

According to Traci Horne Flores, the current Anderson Gallery coordinator, the original value of the printing when it was donated to gallery in 1974 was $20,000.

he was looking at-an authentic Vincent Van Gogh printing. Edwards asked the office staff about the piece, and they knew nothing about it. Positive the print was a Van Gogh, Edwards contacted VCU's Anderson Gallery, and they put it in their safe.

"Van Gogh's persona had become really fascinating to people, so his work is now valued very highly, and the price usually reflects that," Flores said.

The story of the Van Gogh print begins in 1890. After being hospitalized at Saint-Remy-de-Provence, France for what some scholars believe was bipolar disorder, Van Gogh went to stay with his good friend and physician Dr. PaulFerdinand Gachet.

When the printing was appraised in 2000, it's estimated worth was almost a half million dollars. Moorefield, who is currently the director of the Eleanor D. Wilson Museum at Hollins University, credits Edwa rds with addressing the initial concern about the print's safety.

"Dr. Gachet was a mentor and a helpmate to Van Gogh," said Amy Moorefield, the former Anderson Gallery assistant director and curator. "(Gachet) really tried to help him nourish his arts career." Gachet had Van Gogh over at his house one day when he asked Van Gogh to do an etching. What resulted was a portrait of Gachet, and the only known etching that Van Gogh ever did. At the time, Van Gogh was just six weeks away from committing suicide. Gachet used the etching to make 61 printings, many of which have been lost over the years. A printing made

"(Edwards) actually was the one who told the president of the university long ago that this is a Van Gogh and you need to get it into t he gallery," Moorefield said. its way to VCU through one of its former administrators. Henry Hibbs was the president of what eventually became VCU from 1917 to 1959. Accord ing to Moorefield, Hibbs acquired the printing during his travels overseas. In 1974, Hibbs donated the Van Gogh (and 751 other works) to the Anderson Gallery. Edwards, a philosophy and religious studies professor,

Edwards has written four books on Van Gogh, including one coming out in April 2009.

image. It's kind of dark, and that corner was a little darker," Edwards sa id. "I said to myself, 'That's one of the lost Van Gogh's.' Who else would make a print of that and hang it up? It's not something that knocks you over when you look at it, so it almost had to be the real thing if it was going to be hanging in a nice frame in a nice building."

"I looked up in a corner of the waU and I saw that

The printing was then moved back to the

spotted the printing in 1990 and recognized the masterpiece for what it was. "Probably no one looking at that would know it was a Van Gogh unless they had studied Van Gogh," Edwards said.

Sitting in his office surrounded by religious relics and pieces of art, Edwards wistfully reflects on his encounter as one high point in 33 years of teach ing at vcu. "What if I hadn't told?" Edwards said. "Then I'd be able to see it everyday. I cou ld just walk in and look ... now it's put away because it's worth so much. You don't want it to be stolen."

iM02·09

@SMC train for your future endeavors

. ...

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Confessions of a ShQpaholic

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02·09 ink

Whitney: Dress and bag from

Need Supply Co. Ryan: Graphic t-Shirt by Dank.

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Photography: Niki Cash & Brittany Kaufman Fashion Editor: Godsgrace Tetteyfio Fashion Assistants: Brittany Williams, Leilani Littlefield, Whitney Stevens & Alexandra Rosero Models: Ryan Kaufman, Sean Lam, Iris Santiago, Raven Starks & Whitney Stevens Make-up: Amanda Pittman Location: Williamsburg Street

10 simple rules to get that internship GODSG8~CF

IFIIFYFlO

Fashion Editor Summer usually summons thoughts of sun, the beach, fun trips and relaxation. For many, it has become the time to land the coveted summer internship. With students traveling to different states and sometimes different countries for their dream job, summer has become the most competitive season for internships. As spring semester commences, internship deadlines are drawing near and jobs for new graduates are being filled. Here are 10 rules for getting an internship.

1. Create a resume and cover letter. Put any relevant job experience and tailor both documents for the job you are applying for. Make sure to edit, edit, edit. Have other people such as parents, coworkers or career counselors look over your resume. Visit the University Career Center, and ask advisors and teachers for help. 2. Compile a list of places to send your resume and cover letter. Media Bistro, MonsterTRAK and Ed2010 are all good Web sites to use to find internships. 3. Familiarize yourself with the company. The less you know about the company, the less the interviewer will want to hire you. 4 . Make the company Web site your best friend . You can find useful information on the Web site usually in the tool bar at the bottom of the page. This will lead to pertinent company information that can help your search. For example, you may find a company directory that will help you find out whom to contact about an internship. 5. Call or e-mail to inquire about an internship. The company phone number and address may be listed on the website. Most companies use a generic e-mail format (i.e. firstname. lastname@company.com). Do not use an inappropriate e-mail address to contact the company (i.e. Bigbooty09@ yahoo.com). This tells an employer that you aren't serious and often gets overlooked. Also, make the subject of your

Blouse and Pants from Need Supply Co. Shoes from Que Bella.

INTERNSHIp, SEE P. 33 iM02·09

rotrash. Blouse from Need Supply Co. Purse from Que Bella.

Photographers: Kerry McDonnell & Shannon Crooks Fashi on Editor: Godsgrace Tetteyfio Fash ion Assistant/Stylists: Leilani Littlefield & Dena Spruill Models: Kat Stewart & Sean Lam

02·09 iM

Jacket from Shirtfresh. Sweater and Button-up Shirt from Need Supply Co.

Sweater from Need S Shirt from Shirtfresh. upply Co. Bulton-up

Skirt Suit from Eurotrash. Blouse from Need Supply Co. Shoes from Que Bella.

ink 02'09

INTERNSHIp, FROM P. 30 e-mail clear in the subject line. 6. Follow up the e-mail or phone call by sending the correct contact your cover letter and resume. Make sure you provide contact information on both documents. 7. Be persistent! Just because they haven't called doesn't mean you they don't want to hire you. They may receive hundreds of e-mails a day. They could have missed your e-mail or not remembered to call back. Being persistent shows them that you are serious about the job, really want the job and also helps them get to know you. 8. Prepare for the interview. First impressions are important; this may be the only one you get. Dress appropriately for the interview. By knowing the company you may have an idea of their style. Use this knowledge to come up with the perfect interview outfit while showing off your style and appearing professional. Prepare questions to ask during the interview and don't forget to smile.

Sweater from Need Supply Co. Button-up Shirt from Shirtfresh.

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9. Follow up with a thank you note. Handwritten notes are always appreciated, but e-mails will do. If you really want to show your gratitude, send both. Thank them for taking the time to meet with you while briefly reiterating your interest in the position.

Skirt Suit from Eurotrash. Blouse from Need Supply Co. Shoes from Que Bella.

10. Again, be persistent! Remember these people are very busy. Not everyone is good with calling back or getting in contact with people. Give them a couple of days and if you haven't heard from them, call back or e-mail. This shows them how much want the job.

Sweater and Button-up Shirt from Shirtfresh. Jeans from Need Supply Co.

ink 02-09

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8. Prepare for the interview. First impressions are important; this may be the only one yo u get.·Dress appropriately for the interview. By knowing the company you may have an idea of their style. Use this knowledge to come up with the perfect interv iew outfit while showing off your style and appearing professional. Prepare quest ions to ask during the interview and don't forget to smile. 9. Fo llow up with a thank you note. Handwritten notes are always appreciated, but e-mai ls will do. If you really want to show your gratitude, send both. Thank them for ta ki ng the time to meet with you while briefly reiterating your interest in the Positi on. 10. Ag ain, be persistent! Remember these people are very busy. Not everyone is good w ith calling back or getting in contact with people. Give them a couple of days and if you haven't heard from them, call back or e-mail. This shows them how much want the job.

Sweater and Button-up Shirt from Shirtfresh. Jeans from Need Supply Co.

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INT[RNING IN TH[ FASHION INDUSTRY The pressure of Internships In the fashion 1I)d\lSlf)l ClIp be ynnW at;Jd often t imes, unjust, Over the last four years, the 'networking' term has been engraved Into my mind. Over the summer, from using these networking skills, I obtained two Internships In New York City the! lasted almost thrae 1'I\Onth$: All it took to obtain an Internship was to find someone. a friend or teacher, who had previous experience with a cCOII1Pl\I1Y and ask theIn to forward my resum4 with recComrnendatlons. No research, immoculate resum4, or other _mpts of mine were SUcCcessful In ocqulring an Intemshlp. I worked In the rnerl:hendlslng department at a lingerie company for the first half of the summer, and In fabric development for Marc by Marc Jacobs in the second half.

in \he extra tin¥t allowed lor not only more exposure, but also more opportunity to build relationships. GO beyond whefis asked of you and take the next step through using logical instItUtion. Let's face It, the fashion Industry Is filled with ali sorts of "InterestIng," perhaps illegitimate charecters hunting after a highend label Job, so It is important to represent one's self In a demanding, res~. demeanor.

Both Internships Invited me beck next summer and eBcCh wiD provide me with a letter of recCOmmendetlon as needed. The highlight of my unpaid summer work was the Invitation to the Marc by Mare Jacobs Fashion Week shows! This opportunity was my dream since I was a teen and the feeling of having an invitation to the Marc shows in my trembling hands was overwhelming. I high-tailed it to NYC via the ChinatowII Bus during the first week of September and pocked on the sophisticatedly safe block side. Entering the gates of t he show was a mob scene as paparllZzi wete at aU flashing angles, unfortunately not at me, and I was lust trying to keep up with the pack of Marc jaCObs employees. All employees stOocfrn the stadium and watchad the spectacle. The models were as skinny as the pfess eialms and the event had the perfect amount of pandemoniUrrf that OnlY exc:itrw. Following the show was the afterparty heidM Gr~ HQteI, where I locked my eyes on Kanye

A New York fashion Intemshlp is highly compe'tltive, coveted, usually unpaid, and does not guarantee a future Job otret. There are! sfl'ategles to overcoming this uncertainty. From~ theverylng work environments and faults of other interns I was able to set myself apart In a positive way. Dressing the part an4CO!'!(ideJtce, JIO,J~, are basic essentials to being flIcC09n1~•.§how ~ you Q)I do the asslgnedWork iIfIIcIentIY and prove yourself before you try to build any camaraderie widI others. Do not be an Introvert or scared to 1'~ J<e!lY ~anP Jay-Z, offer'help outside your~ and danced my heart away with becCause this an opportunity to learn, co-~ I O!)ly wish I had a better be noticed and figure outWhat earheta!rrllly Fashion WeiIf( was an area of fashion Interests you most. experiance of a life time that would '1!I\1Y interns,!;orl!eill two /)'f three not"have been IIChfeved witho\rt iM days a week for six hours a day. I contacts that helped me land those £hose to corne In ~ <lap a ~ internshiPS; for eight hours eBcCh day. Putting

Fashion with a cause Jones New York in the Classroom 8RIIIANYWilliAMS Staff Writer Founded in 2005, Jones New York in the Classroom is an organization designed to help improve the quality of education for America's children and inspire others to do the same. The organization was founded to help the following non-profit organizations: Teachers Count, Fund for Teachers and Adopt-A-Classroom. Jones New York has created a limited edition T-shirt in collaboration with their organization. All profits from the sale will be donated to Jones New York in the Classroom. With every

purchase of the limited edition T-shirt customers will receive a free support America's teachers magnet.

Viva Glam Lipsticks DfNA SPRUil Con t ribu ti ng Wrltel MAC Cosmetics fills the gap between makeup artistry and fashion photography. MAC has risen to meet the high demands of entertainment and beauty professionals, yet this company has not forgotten about giving back to the community. The company established the MAC AIDS Fund in 1994 as a global effort to support men, women and children affected by HIV and AIDS. In the same year they introduced VIVA GLAM lipstick which retails for $14. MAC AIDS Fund receives 100 percent of the proceeds from VIVA GLAM

products. Proceeds are used to help provide basic life-saving and life-sustaining need for victims. There are currently a total of six shades of VIVA GLAM lipstick and two shades of VIVA GLAM lip g loss sold worldwide. MAC has raised over $128 million for the MAC AIDS Fund.

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OMS

Shoes for Tomorrow "Inspired by a traditional Argentine shoe and challenged by continent's poverty and heath issues, I created TOMS with a singular mission: To make life more comfortable, ' says Blake Mycoskie (pictured with children

below) TOMS accomplishes

thl!;

through a unique shoe and Mycoskie's

commitrnf-'n t to match every pair purchased with a pair to a child in need you buy a pair of TOMS and TOMS gives a pair to a child on your behalf.

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GOOSG8ACf IfIIfYflO Fashion Editor For every pair of TOMS shoes purchased a pair is given to a child in need. Through the One for One movement TOMS has given over 10,000 pairs of shoes to children in Argentina and 50,000 pairs in South Africa since May 2006. Friends of TOMS is a non-profit organization dedicated to mobilizing, connecting and empowering individuals who want to give further aid to communities served by the TOMS Shoes One for One mission. TOMS does shoe drops year round and has opened the experience to anyone interested. TOMS plans to give 200,000 pairs of shoes to children in need around the world this year. To help promote their cause and provide another avenue to get involved TOMS has created a Vagabond tour and set up campus and headquarter internships. To find out more information on TOMS Shoes, the Vagabonds, internships and the shoe drop visit www.tomsshoes.com.