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Cash gIveaWays eveRy WeeK P7


the Independent voIce of ut austIn

sept 28, 2011

vol. 3 Issue 6

Photo: eli Watson

sePteMBeR 28, 2011


Bro food


ut Men’s soccer Club


Big Bite


Ifwould snookie jumped off a cliff you follow her?


uWeekly sits down

how to eat like a man on campus and a budget

first rule of soccer club, don’t talk about soccer club

the good, the bad and the ugly

with este vato

Photo: eli Watson

what the imPlicationS of

The New big 12

meanS foR the futuRe of bevo. before I even begIn, I feel it’s important to establish one thing first and foremost before any further explanation is required: Texas wins. After weeks, even months in some cases, of media spin that depicted Bevo as the big bully who ruined the party for everyone in the Big 12, Texas still found a way to come out on top even at the height of its unpopularity. But hindsight is always so important in examining the details of a story and in sports, it’s invaluable given the insufferably hot-and-cold mentality of most fans. Now that the dust is beginning to settle, however, it’s about time to do that. The truth is, no one’s hands are totally clean, but there are definitely some that are cleaner than others. While the perception of Texas acting as the schoolyard bully who won’t let other kids play with their shiny new toy (which either comes in the form of $100 million in annual revenue or the Longhorn Network, so pick your poison really), you could certainly make the argument that Texas was the first to begin the Big 12’s impending collapse after other schools became bitter about the Big 12’s uneven revenue split. It’s easy to make that person holding all the money look like the bad guy, but as far as “bad guys” go, Texas was simply looking for a deal that was best for it’s institution, and it certainly got one in the form of a 20 year/$300 million network. Is there really any other


September 28, 2011 |

institution who could argue that they wouldn’t do the same many in the Big 12 was that they chose to leave merely a year thing if they were in a position similar to Texas? I doubt it. after signing on to stay with the Big 12 for another five years, Texas had to have known it was pissing people off in the even though they already knew the deal that was in place. process. You don’t become the largest collegiate The real kicker now, though, is that the Aggies athletic brand in the country by having are talking like they’ve planned this all along, everyone like you. But all Texas cared and whether that’s just characteristic “it’S been cleaR about, and rightfully so, was making Aggie bravado, or whether there’s veRy eaRly on that a good deal for The University of actually any substance to that Texas, not The University of the notion, it’s a mistake that could the SooneRS weRe PRobably Big 12. Texas may have started likely cost them millions during the bleeding, but it was the litigation. That would be the last combination of Nebraska thing A&M needs, especially and Colorado, who are both after they pay their $30 million becauSe they felt that theiR own admittedly not huge fans Big 12 exit fee, which is certainly of Texas, leaving the Big 12 far worse than a mere slap on PRoGRam Should caRRy enouGh that eventually drove the the hand for a football program weiGht to do SomethinG SimilaR, conference to the brink. that typically generates revenue Now, after a full year and a in the $45 million per year range. but that haS juSt SimPly half or so of frantic wheeling and Which now leaves us with our not been the caSe.” dealing by the remaining Big 12 beloved neighbors to the north, institutions to keep the conference alive, Oklahoma, who you could very well argue A&M announces that they want out and they came out the worst for wear at the end of this want it now. Granted, they have their own list of deal. It’s been clear very early on that the Sooners ContInued on Page 11 reasons as to why they wanted out, but the bottom line for were probably the most unhappy with

The mosT uNhaPPy wiTh The loNghorN NeTwork

DeeP-FrieD love a few Issues ago, UWeekly ran a feature about shopping organic on a college budget, which is ostensibly quite important to a large portion of our readers. We aren’t doing that this week. In fact, we’re doing the exact opposite. Falafel chips and mediumfirm tofu do have their place, but we can’t leave discount mozzarella-stick sandwiches out. This is UWeekly’s guide to the sloppiest, greasiest, headache-relieving Sunday afternoon bro-chow around campus, on a college budget of course. For the faint of heart, use this page as a hummus bowl, we don’t mind.

biG bite

415 W 24th

For the reckless bro We have to start with Big Bite. I mean, the place is rightfully a legend. Honestly, can you think of another store that will sell you a sandwich filled with mozzarella sticks, french fries, chicken wings, Canadian bacon, eggs, AND torn up hamburger with a straight face? Is that even legal? Our neighborhood Big Bite stays open till 4 a.m. (there is debate if it actually exists during the day), and generally you wind up there after a particularly bleary Friday night. Because frankly, eating a phat sandwich only makes sense after a healthy number of Jägerbombs. Big Bite is the crown jewel of bro-food, but it should only be

restricted to the professionals among us. The profound disregard of health displayed in the menu could destroy the unprepared. It may be hard to maintain faith in humanity when inside its walls, but that’s kinda the point.

hai ky cafÉ

2000 Guadalupe

For the chic bro

Let’s say you’re trying to make a good impression. You’re out with someone who might actually look down on the slobbering over an unholy amalgamation of deep-fried evil, but you still want to make your stomach gasp for air. If that’s the case, go Asian; specifically, go Hai Ky. It’s probably the sole oriental destination on the drag that also caters to primal bro-ness. A modern, nonstuffy environment with hefty portions and a crisp staff, this is the place to go to diversify from your flock of fraternity brothers. If you really want to impress, order the Tofuey. It’s 100% vegetarian and also completely delicious, which means you’ll look pretty fashionable when it arrives at your table.

the day ameRica’S faStfood jointS came uP with the idea to Sell

Two Tacos For 99 ceNTs miGht veRy well be the Pivotal moment of modeRn bRo-volution.

kiSmet cafÉ

uweekly’S Guide to maximizinG your aDveNTures iN bro-cuisiNe

411 W 24th

For the adventurous bro Navigating the Kismet is tricky. Not only is it one of the least aesthetically pleasing restaurants around campus, it’s also home to a very dangerous menu. At any given time, you’re about one wrong syllable away from ordering a smelly, awkwardly-colored platter that looks like it fell out of a camel’s ass. Not that a platter that looks like it fell out of a camel’s ass tastes bad, it’s just an acquired flavor that white kids from the hills of Texas can’t handle. Because Kismat is right next to the aforementioned Big Bite, most of us rather opt for the traditional, obesity-causing American glop than trying something new. But next time, consider the store’s wrap/drink/fries $6 combo. You may not be able to pronounce ‘gyro’ correctly, but you can’t argue with delicious budgeting. Chances are, your more oafish friends don’t even know they love Mediterranean fast food yet. Convert them with a felafel pita, and maybe you’ll wake up the next morning feeling slightly better about your cultured self.

jimmy john’S



For the pantsless bro Jimmy John’s has some truly devious online marketing. Let’s say you want a sandwich, and you decide to order your sandwich with the assistance of Jimmy John’s’ website. After a bewildered, bearded fellow brings your food to your doorstep and a few hours pass by, you may be hungry for another sandwich. Well, you’re in luck, because Jimmy John’s has developed a system that literally gives you a “Repeat Last Order” button. If that isn’t sinister enough, they save your credit card information too, so

you’re continually one click away from having a sandwich. This has created a system where you can be playing Madden in your underwear for a full 24 hours, equipped with a constant supply of delicious sandwiches, which is in equal parts horrifying and amazing. Sure it fuels a slobby antisocial disposition, but it certainly is a delicious slobby antisocial disposition.

99¢ faSt food tacoS Every-fucking-where

For the bro’s bro The day America’s fast-food joints came up with the idea to sell two tacos for 99 cents might very well be the pivotal moment of modern bro-volution. Finally, a way to feed everyone in the car for less than ten bucks and

guarantee everyone’s bathroom breaks will be a little more interesting throughout the night. Fastfood tacos are the pinnacle of cheap, faceless bro-food, but only if it’s after midnight. Eating fast-food tacos while the sun is out has been confirmed to be a primary cause of depression, psychological breakdowns, college dropouts, and perpetual singlehood. But unbreakable bonds have been formed over a curbside meal of an irresponsible number of tacos after a classless evening.

luKe WInKIe | September 28, 2011


Perry Faces Tougher Race After Debate, Florida Poll Gov. Rick Perry’s meteoric rise to the top of the Republican field last month led many observers to conclude that the Texas governor would waltz to his party’s presidential nomination. It’s looking more like a grind dance now. What’s clear after Orlando — an awful debate performance and a humbling loss in the Florida Straw Poll — is that Perry needs to get some rest, step up his game in nationally televised debates and give better and more substantive answers on issues his base cares about deeply. “He needs to regroup,” said University of Virginia political analyst Larry Sabato. “He’s so uneven. He’s done well sometimes, poorly others. It’s unusual that you have a candidate who does show such a disparity in performance. I think part of that is exhaustion.” Sources close to the governor have said privately that Perry is still suffering from the effects of his summer back surgery, making it difficult for him to stand for hours on end. Reporters have tweeted pictures of Perry wearing sturdy, comfortable shoes — as opposed to his traditional cowboy boots — while he debates. The governor’s tendency to run out of gas toward the end of the televised debates has now become such an ingrained notion that Saturday Night Live poked fun at it in its debut this weekend. “This is normally when you get tired and confused,” the mock moderator says. The official line from Team Perry: There are no health issues. Perry is “doing some light running and walking a lot,” said spokesman Robert Black. “His back is fine.” Perry’s top consultant,


September 28, 2011 |

Dave Carney, also gave assurances to The Washington Post that the Texas governor is not taking any pain medication. Despite the brave public face, advisers admit Perry’s troubles mounted after the Florida debate, and they acknowledge he needs more debate prep and a travel schedule that gives him a little more down time. To say that Perry had a bad week, as one of his advisers put it, would be “charitable.” The conservative punditry has turned on the Texas governor, and his shaky debate performance in Florida has sparked real concern among supporters and potential donors that he could suffer a collapse that is just spectacular as his rise. “You could hear checkbooks slamming shut all over America at about 9:30 Thursday night,” said one lobbyist who still supports Perry but believes he wounded himself badly in the Fox News/Google debate. Sabato and other analysts say it’s way too early to call Perry toast. For one thing, conservatives who dominate the GOP electorate still have doubts about Mitt Romney, Perry’s main competition. A CNN poll released Monday shows slippage, but Perry still leads Romney by 7 points. The governor has also held a series of high-profile fundraisers, so unless the money dries up, he should have millions to wage battle at least until the Iowa caucuses begin narrowing the field early next year. “This is going to be a long battle. It’s going to be a roller coaster,” Sabato said. “Just because Perry had a really tough week, and he

did, it doesn’t mean that he can’t come back.” Most of Perry’s troubles have been selfinflicted. In the second televised debate, he gave a monumentally bad answer about his controversial push to vaccinate young girls against sexually transmitted HPV, suggesting that he was “offended” at the idea that a relatively tiny $5,000 political donation could get his attention on the subject. Then in the third debate, he outraged many would-be supporters by suggesting that were heartless for not joining him in supporting Texas legislation that provides in-state tuition to young illegal immigrants who graduate from Texas high schools. Perry was on the verge of walking away with the Florida Straw Poll until that line. Activists opposed to Perry’s in-state tuition position are now discussing plans to picket the governor’s events in Iowa and South Carolina, early primary states where Perry is making a big push — and where illegal immigration is a big issue, said William Gheen, president of the hardliner Americans for Legal Immigration PAC, or ALIPAC.

Perry also flubbed a response on a key international issue in the third debate. Asked how he would respond to a 3 a.m. phone call saying Pakistani nukes had fallen into the hands of the Taliban, Perry began talking about the importance of the U.S. relationship with India and, at one point, Taiwan. Cal Jillson, a Southern Methodist University political scientist who has watched Perry for years, said the Texas governor is “absolutely at sea” when asked about complicated international issues. “I think the idea that Rick Perry was going to go wire to wire — jump in, go straight to the top of the polls and automatically be the nominee — was a fantasy,” Jillson said. “To jump from Texas to the national level is very substantial, and he’s not yet made that jump.” Texas Tribune reporter Reeve Hamilton and Assistant Managing Editor Emily Ramshaw contributed to this story. This article originally appeared in The Texas Tribune

Jay Root

It’s not every day that a game of pong results in saving the life of an unfortunate animal. Pong for Pups, a philanthropy event presented by the Zeta Psi Fraternity and Texas Spirits, had its first ever event on Sept. 22, and due to its positive response, the two groups hope to do it every year now. “The event was just a great time for Zeta Psi, the Spirits and the UT community,” said Zeta Psi president Benjamin Sherman. “We raised $200 and everybody that stopped by had the opportunity to enter in a raffle for an iPod Nano, hang out with one of the dogs Austin Dog Rescue brought and play pongthemed games.” One game consisted of three cups, where participants had three chances to make it in one of the cups. Those who made it were rewarded with a raffle ticket and a drink to fight off the Austin heat.

Austin Dog Rescue, a home-based foster program, has assisted almost 1000 homeless dogs since its inception. The program also promotes dog-friendly events such as Dogtoberfest. Happening Saturday, Oct. 22, Dogtoberfest features canine costume contests, photo booths and many other activities. Along with Pong for Pups, Dogtoberfest’s main goal is to shelter dogs that are not owned or do not have a place to live. “It’s cool because we’re helping save a dog’s life,” said fellow Zeta Psi member Matt Davis. “We’re raising money to make sure they have shelter, and anything else they need. Pong for Pups was a success.” Pong, pups and p eople coming together to make an impact on the Austin community is a great thing, and hopefully these events will continue to accomplish one other goal: keeping Austin awesome.

how to helP


Photo: eli Watson

PonG foR PuPS

elI Watson


aManda ChaPPel

events on oR aRound CaMPus

Publisher Michael Huereque

GluG, GluG


“Vodka Lemon”—the movie, not the drink—will be showing as part of the Slavic and Eurasian Studies Department’s efforts to get you to care about all things Slavic and Eurasian. Winner of the Venice Film Festival, this post-Soviet tale of Armenian life cannot and should not be missed. Nostrovia!

Reign in that spending! Learn how to budget, save and plan for your financial future with lessons from this friendly cow.

September 28 Painter Hall (PAI) 4.42, 7-9 PM

October 3 Waggener Hall (WAG) 101, 3-4 PM “KoNtroll” yourselF

yoGA CluB Must be flexible to join. Every week, stretchers, meditators and even chanters gather together to stretch, meditate and maybe even chant. Bring your mats and your chi.

September 28 Texas Union Building (UNB) Eastwoods Room, 5-6:30 PM

Do the words Hungarian, comedy and thriller go together? Not really, but in this film they do. “Kontroll” takes you through the dark and twisted underworld of the Budapest subway system.

October 5 Painter Hall (PAI) 4.42, 7-9 PM

Art FiGhts iN the street

M swimming & Diving

Orange-White meet , Austin, Texas, 3:00 PM

FRIdAy, SEP. 30


St. Mary’s, Austin, Texas, 6:30 PM

W soccer Kansas, Lawrence, Kan., 5:00 PM

M & W track

Circulation Jeremey Tooker

W rowing

M tennis

Head of the Oklahoma, Oklahoma City, Okla., TBA

ITA All-American Championship, Tulsa, Okla., All Day

M tennis ITA All-American Championship, Tulsa, Okla., All Day

SUNdAy, oCT. 2

W Golf Windy City Classic, Highland Park, Ill., All Day

W soccer

M Golf

Missouri, Columbia, Mo., 1:00 PM

Jerry Pate Intercollegiate, Birmingham, Ala., All Day

W Volleyball

TUESdAy, oCT. 4

Iowa State, Ames, Iowa, 12:00 PM

W tennis

M tennis

ITA All-American Championship, Los Angeles, Calif., All Day

ITA All-American Championship, Tulsa, Okla., All Day

Grass Routes Grand Prix, Austin, Texas, 8:15 PM

W tennis

SATURdAy, oCT. 1

ITA All-American Championship, Los Angeles, Calif., All Day

Iowa State, Ames, Iowa, 6:00 PM

MoNdAy, oCT. 3


Photographer Elijah Watson Shannon Grant

Entertainment Writers William Bass Devon Tincknell Sarah Vasquez Karissa Rodriguez

youR guIde to all thIngs BuRnt oRange.


Editor–in–Chief Sarah Neve

Sports Writers Ryan Betori Brian Bogart

The scheDule Oklahoma, Norman, Okla., 7:00 PM

Ad designer Terry Kennedy

Campus Writers John Jarzemsky Amanda Chappel Luke Winkie

September 29 Doty Fine Arts Building (DFA) 2.204, 6-10 PM

WEdNESdAy, SEP. 28

Art director Jessica Caraway

Copy Editor Daniel J. Frimpter

Kind of like knife fights but with paint brushes, and not so much fighting as celebrating. Either way, join the Fine Arts Library as local street artists show their stuff. A screening of “Exit Through the Gift Shop” will be included.

W Volleyball

Account Executives John Martin

M tennis ITA All-American Championship, Tulsa, Okla., All Day

M Golf Jerry Pate Intercollegiate, Birmingham, Ala., All Day

W tennis

W tennis

W Golf

ITA All-American Championship, Los Angeles, Calif., All Day

ITA All-American Championship, Los Angeles, Calif., All Day

Windy City Classic, Highland Park, Ill., All Day

Intern Arryn Zech CoNTACT 2608 East Sixth Street, Unit 3 Austin, TX 78749 O: 512–358–4149 PUBLISHER Highbrow LLC ABoUT UWeekly Austin

UWeekly Austin is an independent publication and is not affiliated with the University of Texas at Austin. One free copy per person. Additional copies may be picked up at our office for .50 each. Opinions expressed are those of the writers/authors and do not necessarily reflect the opinions of the staff or publishers of UWeekly. Not liable for omissions, misprints, or typographical errors. No part of this publication may be reproduced without the written consent of the publisher. © Copyright 2011 Highbrow, LLC


That’s what she said.

Photos and Interviews by Brian Bogart

“What’s your favorite class this semester?”

“US history, because my teacher is wild. yesterday he got up on the table and impersonated elvis.”


“My favorite class this semester would be Physical Anthropology with Dr. Kirk. His energetic way of teaching, relevant examples and almost falling off the stage everyday due to his excitement makes the class that much more interesting.”


“I would have to say my favorite class is human Sexuality with professor Daley because there is never a dull moment when you have college students talking about sex.”


“My favorite class this semester is my Forensic Anthropology class. We basically spend an hour and a half studying the different stages of decomposition.”


“Legal environment of business because the instructor is passionate about teaching and it’s a very logical class.”


“Auditioning and Monologues with because I am getting my ass kicked.”


Air it out Dear Barton Springs Road, Why are you always so fucking crowded? I know this weekend was Austin City Limits, and I know that festival pumps all sorts of money into our fair city’s economy, but Jesus man, I feel like you are out to get me or something. Since I moved down South, the only way to get to my work is to take Lamar past you every single morning, and you know what? You always fuck my shit up. Either some high school kid is cruising along at 15mph thinking she’s really awesome for cutting first period and because she has a “SUPER SEXY SENIOR 2012!!!!!” soap circle caked over her windshield, or some asshole is blocking the intersection by insisting on nudging his car into a left turn on a yellow light. I don’t mean to pick on you, Barton Springs, but it feels like you are trying my patience on purpose. My commute to work is about 25 minutes. I’d say more than 50% of that is spent traveling between my parking space and your intersection with Lamar, which is less than 5 blocks.

An Air It Out FAQ How to get us to actually print what you write. 1. Everything Anonymous – Not only are we giving you an opportunity to publicly air your grievances, we’re allowing you to hide behind the cowardly mask of anonymity to do it. So we don’t want your name. But we’re also extending that same courtesy to whomever you’re complaining about. If a wasted girl spilled food on you at Kerbey Lane, then call her “a girl.” We don’t need her name, date of birth, or UTEID. 2. Be Brief – Sorry would–be Unabombers, we’re not going to publish your entire manifesto. Short and not–so–sweet is key. If you can’t say what you need in less than 250 words, than you’re rambling, not ranting. 3. Stay Specific – There’s a lot to be annoyed about on campus. We know. But please pick one issue, not seven, and avoid digressing. An open letter to whoever keeps shaving their pubes in the communal sink is good; a list of things you don’t like about living in the dorms is less so.

ACL, of course, made things even worse. Friday had to be a day that I listened to my iPod instead of the radio, otherwise I might have caught a reminder that the second biggest Austin clusterfuck (the first being SXSW) had already descended full force onto my neck of the woods. You know what’s worse than having to start the first half of your morning commute over when you’re already late for work? Lots of things. Polio, for one. But long story short, you’ve been annoying me lately, and I think I might have to start using the backstreets more often.


Always late 4. Powerful Language – At UWeekly, we write our own rules. We’re down to say a naughty word now and again. But there is a huge difference between the rare, well–placed profanity and a barely literate Youtube comment. Your critiques should be at least a little bit more cutting than “blah blah blah is a *@#&!!!” 5. To Whom It May Concern – Air It Out is publishing your open letters, so don’t forget to address them as such. Did some douche lose his lunch the last time you rode the E–Bus? Then open with “Dear Dude Who Barfed on the Bus.” And just because we’re not giving out your name doesn’t mean you can’t let him know who it’s from. Just sign it, “Sincerely, Everyone Else on the Bus.” Please send all Air It Out submissions to AirItOut@ UWeekly reserves the right to edit submissions for content, anonymity, and space. | September 28, 2011


the hiGhliGht reel If you thInk Iowa state is just another name on the Texas schedule, think again. With Texas facing the Cyclones coming off a bye week, this game could prove to be an important statement against a team they lost to last year. That kind of confidence could prove to be pivotal heading into the toughest stretch of the Horns’ schedule, which starts with OU the following weekend. Don’t sleep on Iowa State, either; they’re a 3-0 team themselves, and even if their aggregate margin of victory in three games is eight points, they do a lot of things well and are coming off a bye week of their own. This Saturday’s game just might prove to be more exciting than many think.

let’s Just be honest here, LSU is flat-out salty. They’ve looked like an NFL team so far and their suffocating defense has helped them comfortably pave their way to a 4-0 record. I doubt they’ll win every game, however, given that the SEC is so strong this year that everyone may very well cannibalize each other, but in my mind they are currently the number one team in college football just based on their resumé alone.

how about them Cowboys? No, not the Dallas Cowboys, I’m talking about the Oklahoma State Cowboys who, on the road, roared back after being down 20-3 at the half against Texas A&M to ultimately win 30-29. Not only was the win as impressive for OSU as it was crushing for the Aggies, but some cheeky gits from the visiting section of Kyle Field even did a mock chant of “Big Twelve” in light of A&M’s choice to bolt for the SEC. The irony is not lost, however, when you consider that Oklahoma State appeared to have been straddling the line between the PAC 12 and the Big 12 themselves just a week ago. But what the hell, for now it’s damn good to be an Oklahoma State Cowboy and people in Stillwater are finally starting to feel some mojo.

I was goIng to dedIcate another full section of this week’s Highlight Reel to go in-depth on the true severity of A&M’s collapse against OSU, but I like to think I’m above that. Who am I kidding? No I’m not. Besides being outscored 27-9 (two of those nine points coming from an intentional safety from Justin Blackmon on the last play of the game, who was just running out the clock with the Cowboys up by three), the Aggies also turned the ball over in three consecutive possessions to continuously leave the Cowboys in great field position. Not to mention the fact that this collapse happened in front of the fourth largest crowd in Kyle Field history during the first match-up between two Top 10 teams in that stadium since 1975. To say this was a blown opportunity by the Aggies to show the nation they were ready for the SEC would be an understatement, but hey, at least they got what they wanted.

three weeks Into the football season and the best teams so far are the Packers, Lions, and Bills? Believe it. They’re all undefeated, they’ve all racked up big wins against good opponents, and they’ve all shown a lot of moxie along the way. For Buffalo to finally beat New England after enduring 15 straight losses to their rivals was season-altering, and as far as the Packers and Lions go, all I can say it’s going to be one hell of a race for the NFC North.

BRIan BogaRt

Photo: Justin verlander, credit: leadfoot

ContInued fRoM get along Page 4

the Longhorn Network because they felt that their own program should carry enough weight to do something similar, but that has just simply not been the case. When OU reluctantly signed its deal to keep the Big 12 floating, it saw the Aggies leaving as its justification to apply for membership in the PAC 12, a move that would effectively end the Big 12, even with Texas still in the conference.

texaS will almoSt ceRtainly make Some conceSSionS,

sTarTiNg wiTh The FiriNg oF big 12 commissioNer DaN beebe, but they’Re moStly aeSthetic chanGeS foR the Sake of Photo: eli Watson

oklahoma beinG able to Save face. Dan Beebe, but they’re mostly aesthetic changes for the sake of Oklahoma being able to save face. So where does that leave the Burnt Orange and White now? While it’s clear that there’s very little life left in the Big 12, schools in the conference are already looking at what their next options might be 3-5 years down the


What happened instead was the PAC 12 essentially telling OU “Thanks, but no thanks as long as Texas isn’t coming with you,” and the Sooners walked out of negotiations with a healthy dose of egg on their face. Now just in the interest of not looking like a total dick, Texas will almost certainly make some concessions, starting with the firing of Big 12 commissioner

road, and for Texas, it could very well prove fruitful to eventually join the PAC 12 and create the nation’s first “Superconference” to compete with the likes of the SEC. At that point the Longhorn Network will already be well established and it would effectively end A&M’s competitive advantage of being able

to tell recruits that they get to play in college football’s best conference. But then again, what do I know? I’m just a sports writer, not DeLoss Dodds, and given the way everything has been comin’ up Texas lately, I’m not about to argue with whatever it is he’s got planned.

BRIan BogaRt

Photo: Ryan Betori

Longhorns lace up their cleats UT men’s soccer club blends high-stakes intensity and fun When I think of the word “club,” images are conjured of boys hiding away from girls in tree houses, or of middle-aged women sipping wine in white living rooms and discussing the merits of Jodi Picoult. In other words, a club seems to be people prodding something out of nothing, and although the results may be entertaining, oftentimes they are also goofy and not wholly warranted. But if it’s just about laughs anyway, team was in a fairly heated debate over the appropriation who really cares? of gas money). But in the eyes of MPA grad student Grant Well, the University of Texas’ men’s soccer club is no such Olszewski, who’s been with the program for five years, that farce. And although there are many to be had, the club is also means more fun. about a lot more than laughs. “It’s competitive but it’s not the same,” said Olszewski when Freshman Joshua Kim summed up the club’s sentiment when comparing the club to a D-1 team. “It’s more fun and laid back. asked why he decided to join. With a face as stone-cold as a There’s not the pressure of a scholarship.” sheet of ice, he replied, “I want to win a national championship.” In addition to the more genial atmosphere, the team also hosts No laughing there. The terse intensity of that statement mixers and team dinners. What inevitably ensues is a group of was reflected by the practice witnessed last Wednesday 50 or so guys who are pretty damn close. It’s a fraternity of sorts. (evidently the softest of the three weekly practices). To put A fraternity that’s really, really good at soccer. it simply, the team was going at it. The intensity of All of this is a big reason Olszewski was drawn the practice was several notches above that of to the club. It satisfies the competitive urge for a top high school program. Two players even high-level soccer, but it also fulfills the more went down with injuries. I was surprised. immediately collegiate need for friendship Soccer club? I suppose I was still thinking and good times. Despite the team’s It’s a fraternity of living rooms and secret handshakes, but focus at practice, what I also saw was sorts. A fraternity the first five minutes of practice erased kids enjoying themselves. One player those notions. cracked a joke about a house that had a that’s really, really A decisively focused tone is the reason port-a-potty in its backyard. Everyone, for the club’s Texas-sized success. The team including head coach Matt Prewett, has won three national championships laughed. Something tells me Mack Brown since its inception in 1964. Last year, the doesn’t allow himself to chuckle at port-ateam advanced to the national semi-finals and potty jokes in the middle of practice. the expectations are similar for this season. The “I have an open and friendly enough relationship success isn’t shocking considering the team’s work ethic and so the kids are having fun,” said Prewett. the caliber of player it accepts. Don’t waste your time coming That doesn’t mean he’s a buddy. At practice, Prewett was out for the club if you’re trying to learn more about the game. hobbling on a crutch and a broken foot, but when he barked The club is for those that know what they’re doing, players who instructions, the team did not hesitate to follow. were the best guys at their high school, many of whom could “He’s an authority figure,” said Olszewski. “You can joke have (or even have) played Division 1 soccer. with your boss, but at the end of the day he’s still your boss.” That’s the kicker: Despite the success and passion the It’s a good way to look at Prewett. Although he is the head program demands, it’s not a D-1 program. That means no coach, and a very qualified one at that (he’s been coaching UT for scholarships, less notoriety, and few perks (after practice the eight years and will soon have his “A” license, the highest possible coaching certification), Prewett is still somewhat of a facilitator.

good at soccer.


September 28, 2011 |

He’s a real-estate broker by day, and although he receives some very minimal compensation, the club is for him what it is for the students: a fun way to stay involved with soccer. “It’s supposed to be run by the students for the students,” said Prewett. What that involves is annual dues amounting to roughly $400. It also means the club has its own student president and three student vice presidents (finances, logistics, and communications). Students find their own way to games. They also have to put school first (practice can be occasionally missed for tests or labs). And, for the most part, they’re in charge of rallying support. The soccer club fandom is spotty, consisting mostly of girlfriends, friends, and parents, so players do all they can to spread the word. Last year, the players created a Facebook group to get 1800 students to the A&M game, a record attendance for a home game, all of which are held at the IM fields. In the end, all the effort on and off the field is worth it, even if it’s largely unnoticed and unappreciated. At nationals last season, an injured senior was put in during overtime where he kicked the winning goal to advance the team to the semi-finals. “It was the most intense experience of my college career,” said Olszewski. The students in the UT men’s soccer club are not only doing something they love and have fun doing, but they’re also learning how to be good students and team players. “It the most fulfilling thing,” said Prewett, “to see dopeyhaired freshman who don’t know shit from Cheyenne turn into mature gentleman who are ready to take on the world.”

Ryan Betori

To see the club’s schedule or how to join visit:

Stafford’s interesting journey Once you leave collegiate baseball, the professional game can be as cruel off the field as it is on it. Everyone that knows the game has seen the potential Sam Stafford possesses on the mound. Whether it was the 3.0 innings of no-hit baseball against Rice, the eight strikeouts in 3.0 innings against Oral Roberts, the seven strikeouts in 4.1 innings against Prairie View A&M, or the lowest batting average against for any UT pitcher with over 20.0 innings of work, it was clear that Stafford showed flashes of greatness on the mound as a sophomore. All the left-hander needed was a chance to be more consistent on the mound. As a junior, he got that chance. In his second outing as a junior, Stafford racked up a career high 10 strikeouts in 5.1 innings. He was just getting started. It was a magical junior campaign that included 7.0 innings of no-hit baseball on the road against Texas A&M-Corpus Christi, just one earned run in 10.2 innings during regional play, a strong start in game three of a Super Regional, and 3.0 dominant innings in Omaha against North Carolina. The potential was turning into dominance. In 81.1 innings last season, the left-hander had the highest strikeouts per nine innings (10.1), held batters to a .189 batting average, and posted a 1.77 ERA. The Yankees saw enough from Stafford to use a second-round pick on the UT lefty. Then, just when it looked like Stafford was all set to become a professional player, baseball turned into business. He had an entire season that he’ll never forget about because just when he thought he had it figured out, things changed. The good news for Texas Longhorn fans is that Stafford is back. UT might have lost out on a few big-time prospects that signed right at the MLB deadline, but it got back a lefty that should be one of the best pitchers in college baseball. After all, you can never have too much pitching, right? That saying is especially true for 6-4 left-handers that can throw 94 MPH, which is one of the main

reasons why Stafford was selected in the secondround by the Yankees. Just when it looked like Stafford was set to begin a new chapter in his life, a chapter for which he was ready, the Yankees threw Stafford a nasty, 12-6 curveball that rivals anything he could throw off the mound. “I got drafted 88th overall by the Yankees,” Stafford said after a fall practice session at UFCU Disch-Falk Field. “I was excited to be selected by such a great organization [with] a lot of tradition and a lot of history. I was excited to have an opportunity to be part of that. My goal, just like pretty much everyone’s goal, is to come here, play for three or four years, give all you can to the university and then get your professional career started. That’s kind of the way I was looking at it. It wasn’t really about the money. It was about me feeling ready, and confident in my baseball skills to start my professional play. Unfortunately, that didn’t work out.” Make no mistake about it. Stafford is glad to be back, and is glad to get to chase a national championship one more time. But there was definitely a moment when it looked like the next step to fulfilling his dream of being a major leaguer would come true, and that he’d start to author that next chapter of his life. He felt he was ready. There was a moment when wearing the prestigious pinstripes was a reality, but Stafford then found out the hard way how cruel draft negotiations can be. “Yeah, there was definitely a moment when I thought it was going to work out,” stated the senior, who posted a 1.77 ERA last year in 81.1 innings. “Then, it started dragging out. Communication was a big thing that kind of surprises you. You really don’t talk that much, or at least I didn’t in my situation, with the team. They kind of go in spurts. I went to Florida. I did my physicals and all that. There was a point when I thought I would sign and I would get everything

started. But I believe everything happens for a reason, and I believe that I’m back in Austin with great things to come. Like I said, the Yankees and I had some disagreements, didn’t come to term on things, and that’s why I’m back here. I’m really excited for this season. I think we’ve got a good team. Fall practices just started, so we’re going to get to really see some character in some guys, and how they compete out there. I think things will start to piece themselves together, and we’ll start to really find out who will really be our big contributors this year.” Now, Stafford is back in Austin, back wearing the burnt orange, and finds himself in a unique situation. Not only is he expected to be one of the best pitchers in the country, but he returns as one of the veteran leaders of the Texas baseball team one season after really bursting onto the scene as one of the premier pitchers in the country. “I’m trying to lead more by example than anything,” said the left-hander. “I’m not a big ‘ra ra’

Speaking of this team, it was about this time last year when Garrido said he started to see the championship quality of last year’s team. Garrido said at Omaha that he could see the championship potential and the “it” of last year’s group during fall practice. That’s one of the reasons that no matter how bad it looked at times, and it certainly looked bad at times, he still felt he had a championship-type of team. He was right. It sounds like Stafford sees some of those same qualities in this year’s group as well. “Absolutely. I think every team that comes out at the University of Texas has a little championship in them,” responded Stafford when asked if he felt this team had championship qualities. “It’s about putting the right puzzle pieces together. To get here, obviously, you have to be a great baseball player. It’s about staying in the moment and really turning it on when those lights come on [with] people in the stands. It’s about really focusing on what you need to do

“I think things will start to piece themselves together, and we’ll start to really find out who will really be our big contributors this year.” guy. I’m trying to work harder than anyone else, be early to practice; just doing all the little things on the baseball field and showing guys you’re not dreading practice. You’re here to get better and have fun doing it. The freshmen see that. You know, it doesn’t have to come from me. It could come from any player. Like coach (Augie) Garrido says, ‘attitude is contagious whether that’s a good attitude or a bad attitude,’ and right now this team has a pretty awesome attitude.”


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rather than worrying about if that girl thinks I’m looking cute out here on the baseball field, or if I’m impressing the coaches or not. You just have to take care of business. This year’s team really has that mentality - putting our nose to the grindstone and getting after it and at the same time having some fun.” For Stafford, the opportunity to sign with the Yankees as a second-round pick didn’t work out. However, that Continued on Page 14


99.95 annually | September 28, 2011


Fantasy football

Capitalizing on hump day How to manage your fantasy roster for Week 4 But one receiver’s downfall is another’s opportunity, so Nate Washington wiped away that tear and went to work. Let’s face it. Aside from the thrill of a new UWeekly issue, hump days are never very fun, especially in sports. Last weekend’s glories are a fading memory and we’re still several days away from the action of another delightful Sunday. Wednesdays are a dislocated, forsaken day of the week for sports fans. But what may be trash for the sporting calendar is an opportunity for fantasy football gold. Champions are made on the waiver wire, so get out the laptop and start clicking.

Pickup/Play: Nate Washington (Titans WR): When Titans leading wide receiver (and best overall player) Kenny Britt went down with a season-ending knee injury on Sunday, the whole state of Tennessee shed an embittered tear. But one receiver’s downfall is another’s opportunity, so Nate Washington wiped away that tear and went to work. Against the Broncos Sunday, Washington compiled eight catches, 92 yards, and 1 TD. With Matt Hasselbeck on fire, the Titans are passhappy. With Britt gone, Washington will now be the chief benefactor of that enthusiasm. Torrey Smith (Ravens WR): Two words: Breakout game. Actually, that would be an

Continued from orangebloods Page 13

certainly doesn’t mean that he can’t come back to Texas, get better, and leave the program as an even higher draft pick. With his athletic 6-4 frame and stuff, there is even a possibility that the former Klein Collins High School standout could end up being a first-round pick. After really blossoming in his first season as a heavy contributor, he’s already targeted the areas he wants to improve on. “Consistency and command are the things that I’m focused on the most,” said the senior. “And when I say that, [it] means with all four pitches. If one day guys are hitting my curveball, that’s means being able to go to my cutter. If they’re


September 28, 2011 |


understatement. The rookie from Maryland, who hadn’t caught a pass all season, exploded against the Rams for five catches, 152 yards, and 3 TDs. Last week, he was the highest point-scorer of any fantasy player. That’s a coming out party that would make Diddy drool. Smith got the nod after Lee Evans got injured. Smith will be a regular from here on out. But the question is, will he be a one-hit wonder? Pick him up but don’t fall in love too quickly. Ryan Mathews (Chargers RB): At the 2010 NFL draft, Mathews was the 12th overall pick after displaying dazzling talent at Fresno State. So a lot of owners took a gamble on the rookie with the belief he had a chance at a huge season. And what happened? An ankle injury and a measly 678 yards and seven TDs. Heading into the 2011 season, the belief in Mathews as a big-time back was about as low as his 40-yard dash time. For the first two weeks, Mathews didn’t exactly prove haters wrong, although he was solid (over 200 all-purpose yards). But last week, Mathews finally broke through with 98 rushing yards, 51 receiving yards, and 2 TDs. Expect Mathews to build on the performance and keep excelling. Next week he’s got the Dolphins, who’ve given up over 100 rushing yards per game. Not a bad place to start.

Michael Vick (Eagles QB): I know, Vick’s your guy. He’s the man who you were in a frenzy over on draft day, falling irretrievably for his athleticism and blatant “wow” factor. The pick, in short, that your fantasy season hinges on. Well, cut your losses. The very things that make Vick such a thrill to watch (speed, arm strength, big play magnet) are the same attributes that make Vick a risky fantasy proposition. This season, that risk has not paid off. First it was the concussion, now it’s the hand. Vick has looked more like a rag doll than a star quarterback. If Andy Reid has any sense (or sympathy), he’ll bench Vick this week so he can get healthy. Even if Reid decides to play him, you shouldn’t. Michael’s a hot mess right now. Antonio Gates (Chargers TE): If only life was a video game and one could turn off the “injury” button in the NFL. It seems this year more than ever talent is being wasted away on the sidelines. Gates isn’t quite this bad as he’ll be a contributor this season. However, with a lingering foot injury that doesn’t seem to want to get better, Gates is risky as your

hitting my cutter, it means being able to go to my changeup. It’s just being able to adapt to my environment, the situation, and being able to do what I need to do to help my team win.” Even though the Longhorns went 0-2 during last year’s College World Series, the experience has to help, especially for the young players that got to live moment. For the Longhorns, it’s something they should be able to build upon. “I think it’s huge, and even for the guys that didn’t get to play in Omaha, they were there,” Stafford said about the impact participating in last year’s College World Series can have on this year’s team. “They got to see the stage that everyone in college baseball wants to play on.

It’s not about the Tuesday games or the Friday night games. Where you want to be is in Omaha. Unfortunately, we went two and out. It was great to have that experience, but we left with a bad taste in our mouths. We’re going to come out even more focused this year with a little chip on our shoulder. And just getting out there and competing and having fun with the guys here is [another thing] I’m focused on. Last year, and the three previous years I’ve been here, I think that’s something that we’ve done. We’ve had a lot of fun with it. We’ve had some great team chemistry, and I can already tell this team is going to be another story like that. We’ve already set the bar. Like we do every year winning a national cham-

No. 1 TE. When he’s completely healthy, he’s one of the best in the game. The problem is that he is not completely healthy. Currently listed as a game-time decision, even if Gates does manage to play against the Dolphins this weekend, his production is likely to be stymied and his minutes limited. Reggie Bush (Dolphins RB): Ever since Bush got into the NFL he’s been a headache: overpaid, under-producing, and constantly talking. It’s time to pop a couple of aspirins and get rid of the guy. Need evidence? Try 27 carries for 69 yards and 0 TDs. Daniel Thomas, the team’s rookie back, has taken advantage of Bush’s slump and established himself as the go-to guy. With the Dolphins struggling, Bush will get even less love. Get rid of him while you can.

Ryan Betori

pionship is our goal, and that’s our team goal again this year. And everyone is on the same page. I’m looking see how that evolves and how everyone grows. It’s early in the fall, and it’s hard to tell. But we already have some great team chemistry right now. It’s going to be a fun ride.” Longhorn fans are hoping, as they do every year, that the fun ride ends with another national championship at the College World Series. Fortunately for Texas fans, one of the nation’s best pitchers is back to help navigate that ride. If that ride ends where Stafford thinks it will, there will be some happy Longhorns.

Dustin McComas Staff

Photo: Bellator

this week in face punchin’

Jones Continues Dominance over Light Heavyweights Jon Jones became the first person to defend the UFC light heavyweight title since Lyoto Machida defended the title in 2009, as the 24-year-old continued his dominance over the 205-pound division with a fourth round submission victory over former champion Quinton “Rampage” Jackson in the headliner at UFC 135 on Saturday. The event, which took place in Denver, was the organization’s first in the Mile High State since UFC 1 in 1993. In the night’s co-headliner, late replacement Josh Koscheck returned to action for the first time since a lopsided championship loss to Georges St-Pierre in December, and he had to make yet another comeback in his fight as Matt Hughes dominated his fellow welterweight until Koscheck landed a knockout punch with just one second left in the first round. Koscheck has hinted that he will now move up to the middleweight division, while the loss for Hughes – his second knockout loss in a row – could signal the end of his Hall of Fame career. Other main card winners at UFC 135 were heavyweights Mark Hunt and Travis Browne and lightweight Nate Diaz, who submitted Takanori Gomi with an arm bar in the first round of their bout. End-of-night bonuses of $75,000 went to Koscheck (knockout of the night), Diaz (submission of the night) and Jon Jones and Quinton Jackson (fight of the night). Bellator 51 was held in Canton, Ohio on Saturday night, and four fighters earned their way into the semifinals of the season five bantamweight tournament with victories at the event. Most notable was Olympic wrestling bronze medalist Alexis Vila, who stunned Bellator featherweight champion Joe Warren – who had entered the bantamweight tournament looking to become a two-division champion – with a smashing knockout just 64 seconds into their headline bout. Vila will face Marcos Galvao in the semifinals; Galvao earned a split

decision over former WEC bantamweight champion Chase Beebe earlier in the night. Top bantamweight prospect Eduardo Dantas also earned his semifinal spot with a knockout, as he landed a flying knee on Wilson Reis that left the veteran Brazilian seeing stars. Dantas’ semifinal opponent will be former tournament finalist Ed West, who earned a unanimous decision over another top prospect in Luis Nogueira. Highly touted light heavyweight prospect Lorenz Larkin faced the toughest test of his career at Strikeforce Challengers 19 on Friday night, as the undefeated fighter was taken to a decision by a very game 30-fight veteran in Nick Rossborough. Rossborough was a late replacement in the bout, but he showed up to fight and stayed standing despite shot after shot from Larkin. Randy Couture’s son Ryan bounced back from the first professional loss

Highly touted light heavyweight prospect Lorenz Larkin faced the toughest

test of his career at Strikeforce Challengers 19 on Friday night...

of his career, as he defeated Maka Watson via unanimous decision in the co-feature. Former LSU fullback Shawn Jordan submitted top

heavyweight prospect Lavar Johnson with a keylock in the second round of their fight, and Jason High extended his winning streak to six with a unanimous decision over Todd Moore. Dream returned with Dream.17 in Japan on Saturday, and Shinya Aoki extended his winning streak to six while also defending his Dream lightweight title with a victory over UFC veteran Rob McCullough. Other notable winners were top Tatsuya Kawajiri (submission over Joachim Hansen), undefeated welterweight Yan Cabral (submission over Kazushi Sakuraba), and UFC veteran Gerald Harris (split decision over Kazuhiro Nakamura). The quarterfinals of the Dream bantamweight grand prix also took place, and advancing in the tournament were Rodolfo Marques, Masakazu Imanari, Bibiano Fernandes, and Antonio Banuelos. Titan Fighting Championships returned to HDNet on Friday, and the event featured former WEC veteran Jamie Varner in the headliner. Fast-rising prospect Dakota Cochrane earned a unanimous decision over

Varner, who has now won just one of his last six bouts. Heavyweight UFC veteran Eddie Sanchez earned a split decision over Brett Rogers, who has now lost four of his last five bouts. Anthony Gutierrez moved his record to 4-0, and WEC and Bellator veteran James Krause was also victorious. “The Ultimate Fighter” returned with its fourteenth season last week, and the first season to featured bantamweight (135 pounds) and featherweight (145 pounds) is loaded with top unsigned talent from across the country. UFC president Dana White and coaches Michael Bisping and Jason “Mayhem” Miller were impressed with the small guys, who produced finishes in 13 of 16 qualifying bouts. The cast for the show is now set after each fighter fought his way into the house:

Bantamweights: John Albert, Johnny Bedford, Roland Delorme, T.J. Dillashaw, John Dodson, Josh Ferguson, Louis Gaudinot, Dustin Pague

Featherweights: Stephen Bass, Dennis Bermudez, Diego Brandao, Marcus Brimage, Bryan Caraway, Akira Corassani, Dustin Neace, Steven Siler

David McKinney | September 28, 2011


Photo: sarah vasquez

notable muSic venue celebRateS anniveRSaRy of hoStinG live muSic, faShion ShowS and even weddinGS brIng out the bIrthday cake because Mohawk is turning five years old. The venue, located on the corner of 10th Street and Red River, has brought live music since 2006 and they will celebrate with four nights of music on Sept. 29 through Oct. 2. The motto at the Mohawk is “All are Welcome.” Whether people are into hip-hop, indie rock, country or metal, the venue hosts a diverse range of genres on any given night. Some bands have played some of their earliest shows on the inside stage and have grown to become common names in the music community. “Most of my favorite moments are on the inside stage just because that’s where a lot of the really raw shit happens. I mean we try to develop bands on the inside stage and if they grow big enough, they go to the outside stage,” said Mohawk owner James Moody. “The Decemberists played inside on that stage.” At first, Moody was unsure about the location after its high turnover rate previous to the

Mohawk. But to Moody, the place had potential. “The corner in particular wasn’t all that desirable because its history and because it was the last stop on Red River. But the actual space was desirable because it provided a lot of nooks and crannies for inside drinking, outside lounging, inside music, outside music, little nooks upstairs,” said Moody. “You can get lost in there pretty easily. So for the overall size of the property and the types of music I wanted to book, it was perfect.” Music fans can watch any show on the outside stage at one of the three levels at the Mohawk. Whether it’s on the ground floor or on one of the two upper levels, people can enjoy the band from any direction. “There is a cool vibe..., especially outside: the deck, the trees, multiple angles to see a band,” said The Loyalty Firm owner Ryan Cano. “It takes a degree of skill to play to everyone in the audience there. But the bands that do can really enrapture you to the exact

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reason you see live shows: to escape and get those goosebumps on your arm and a little ringin’ in your ears perhaps.” Lisa Pulsifer has attended shows at Mohawk since it opened. She remembers an early The Decemberists show on the inside stage. “(The band) played through a full set there and walked through the crowd and went outside and did an acoustic set in the middle of the outdoor plaza there. It was really sweet,” said Pulsifer. Mohawk is also where Pulsifer met her husband Eric Pulsifer. During South by Southwest Music Festival (SXSW) in 2008, they both found themselves waiting in line for tacos at a day show, which included a line-up consisting of British Sea Power, Clipse, Cut Copy and No Age. “We bumped into each other there,” said Eric. “We joked as we were dating, it’ll be really cool to get married there. We ended up getting engaged there.”

On Sept. 4, Eric and Lisa Pulsifer were married at the same music venue they met at that SXSW. Weddings are not an everyday occurrence at Mohawk. However, it’s not surprising to catch an event other than music there: motorcycles lined up inside during happy hour, local wrestlers fighting in a wrestling ring or most recently, people eating their weight in queso. “The idea was to try to bring something that complimented an already strong scene and we wanted something more,” said Moody. Notable celebrities, such as Bill Murray, GZA and Owen Wilson, have made appearances at the Mohawk. Green Day stopped by after a show to hang out in the green room. Moody said that weird shit happens there all the time. However, no one should expect Moody and company to roll out the red carpet. “We don’t even own a red carpet,” said Moody. “If we did, it would have cigarette burns in it and duct tape on it.”

saRah vasQueZ

Photo: Mark Zuckerberg; guillaume Paumier / Wikimedia Commons, CC-by-3.0.

heaDliNes with john jaRzemSky

facebook chanGeS, millioNs make iDle ThreaTs The social networking gurus over at Facebook have once again tinkered with the site’s design and functionality, predictably raising the ire of people who are on Facebook way too much. The most recent developments implemented a feed within a feed that is admittedly head-scratch worthy, but the way people are reacting, you’d think Mark Zuckerberg personally changed everyone’s profile picture to bestiality porn. A few priceless moments: seeing my Facebook feed blow up with tons of people complaining about the new changes to Facebook, friends who work for Facebook obliviously gushing about how awesome the new Facebook is, and a few disgruntled net-junkies loudly proclaiming that they are switching to Google+ (remember that?), all on their Facebook status.

Rick PeRRy waS gay This whole Time Anybody who has been following the 2012 Roberto Arango (shameful sexting scandals Presidential Race, and Austin/Texas politics aren’t only bipartisan, they’re also pansexual!), in general, knows that Rick Perry has been we can look forward to Perry sweating under lauded by many as the frontrunner for the hot lights in the next few months. GOP nomination. I surrender my bleeding heart liberal Texan credentials to no one, but even I’m a little suspect of the (seemingly) recent whisperings about Perry’s sexuality. The Austin Chronicle is running an ad offering compensation to anyone, male or female, who is willing to go public with their story of a After a number of changes had Netflix sexual encounter with the governor. It seems users ready to dump their subscriptions, that once Perry got ahead in the polls, the company’s CEO Reed Hastings everybody with a 512 area code decided the best PR move was to began casually making send everyone a really weird references to how long i SuRRendeR my e-mail that was formatted Perry has been in bleeDiNg hearT to look like a message the closet. Is it the liberal TeXaN from a psycho ex. “I really hair? And who else cRedentialS to no messed up,” Hasitngs but Republicans one, but even i’m a begins, before going on would care about to plead for a chance this issue anyway? little SuSPect of the to explain the changes It seems like this (SeeminGly) Recent to Netflix’s streaming one will blow over, whiSPeRinGS about and home-delivery DVD but if current trends PeRRy’S Sexuality. services. I appreciate the continue in the vein sentiment (I guess), but I feel of Anthony Weiner or

like there were better ways to go about this. If Hastings had stood outside my window with a boom box over his head blasting Peter Gabriel, then we could talk.

netflix ceo SendS tuRnS out einStein craZy eX-gF/bF leTTer wasN’T ThaT smarT To subscribers Physics experts at the City College of New York announced on Thursday that they had clocked a certain type of subatomic particle at velocities exceeding the speed of light. If proven true, this finding would challenge Albert Einstein’s theory of relativity, something researchers from all parts of the globe have been attempting for decades. Upon hearing that a beam of fired neutrinos was clocked at approximately 60 nanoseconds faster than the speed of light, aging science fiction nerds everywhere gleefully cackled at the thought of Earth coming one step closer to a the age of hyperdrive engines and teleportation, while every person in America under the age of 20 asked “Albert Who?” before checking their status update totally blasting Mark Zuckerberg for more comments.

Photo: Miss Missy

Do more ThaN jusT DaNce the GaGaRazzi buRleSQue and vaRiety Show benefitS eQuality texaS


the hIghball wIll be overrun by lots of Little Monsters and Bad Kids for the first ever Gagarazzi, a burlesque and variety show benefiting Equality Texas. Haylan Teel and Dena Greenwalt have spent a year organizing and promoting the event, which includes a raffle for Lady Gaga-themed prizes, three costume contests, live music and what Teel described as “a gigantic dance party” to close out the evening. On September 22, 2010, Tyler Clementi discovered he had been the subject of a sex video that was live-streamed by his roommate onto the Internet. Clementi, devastated by the discovery, left his dorm room and jumped off the George Washington Bridge to his death. His body was discovered and identified a week later, two miles north of the bridge. Clementi’s death was one of six suicides by gay individuals in September 2010. Teel and Greenwalt hope Gagarazzi will inspire others to organize similar events and strengthen the equality movement. “Austin can be an oasis as far as equality and tolerance is concerned,” said Teel. “But the more people become educated and comfortable with it, the more it spreads. So there will be fewer kids killing themselves and fewer laws binding people from being equal to each other.” Teel and Greenwalt work together in the Austin-based B-movie cooperative Homespun Horror, the sole purpose of which, Teel said, is to have fun while creating B-movies. Homespun Horror has been working tirelessly to create Lady Gaga-themed videos that will be screened throughout the night at The Highball. Gagarazzi gives the two friends a chance to work together on something that Teel said is “bigger than ourselves.” “If you can’t stand up and do something for what you believe in, you can’t expect anything

to change,” said Teel. “No one else is going to do it for you.” Gagarazzi will feature different burlesque troops from all around Austin and Texas including the Austinbased troop The Jigglewatts. Coco Lectric started the Jigglewatts in 2006 with her longtime friend and dancing partner Ruby Joule. The Jigglewatts are composed entirely of full-time burlesque dancers, and while their time is in high demand, they decided to take part in Gagarazzi

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September 28, 2011 |

because of their belief in the equality movement. Lectric said she also saw an opportunity to battle the misconception that burlesque is simply stripping. “We’re choosing to look like grown women and be comfortable in our skin no matter how incongruous our body type may be to mainstream media,” said Lectric. “Ninety-nine percent of us look different from what’s in the pages of Vogue or the airbrushed pages of Playboy. It not only empowers other women who look like us to feel better and be stronger, but even their partners can look at us and say, ‘Oh, that’s real. I’ve been misinformed.’” Lectric was a ballerina and gymnast when she was younger and began modeling for fitness magazines as her modeling and dancing career began taking off. She said the message of burlesque, that every one

is acceptable no matter what their body type, has helped her not feel she needs to maintain the “manufactured idea” pushed by mainstream media. “That ideal is a myth,” said Lectric. “Even in the gay and lesbian community, women of color, men of color, and little people and big people, it doesn’t matter because we’re all on the same page.” Lady Gaga has been an outspoken advocate for gay rights and equality for as long as she has been in the public spotlight. Gaga donates $20,000 from every tour stop to a charity that helps teens who have been kicked out of their homes after revealing their sexual identities to their parents. In 2010, that worked out to $4 million. Her charity inspired the event’s Gaga-centric events and costume contest. “If anyone is pushing that issue it’s her,” said Greenwalt. “People need to accept human beings for who they are. We’re all the same red meat inside.”

BRett thoRne


big biTe battle I NEVER FEEL oKAy ABoUT MySELF WHEN I walk out of Big Bite; there’s always regret. But then I fall asleep and when I wake up I forget about it, and all of a sudden I end up at Big Bite again. It has a memory-erasing effect. Well, actually, that’s probably the alcohol. I can honestly say that I have never seen anyone make a positive decision or look like they feel good about themselves when they come in contact with that fucking restaurant. It’s like an opium den. This issue’s edition of Versus is a little different. As you can see,

we’re switching up the layout, but most importantly, the question for this week was a little more direct. We took to the streets to ask UT students their thoughts on one of the most infamously contentious diners around campus, the proudly unhealthy Big Bite. Complete with an irresponsibly huge menu that spans everything from pizza delivery to eggplant Parmesan, and a reputation for staying open till 4 a.m. on weeknights, chances are you’ve ended up in its deep-fried clutches once or twice. As you’ll read, it’s a pretty easy place to develop polarized feelings for.


iS it Safe to bRinG a baby into biG bite? • Bringing a baby to Big Bite would scar it for life, I mean, if it even survives it in there. • Oh my god, no, you’d probably lose it in that place. Someone might try to eat it! • With the density of drunk people in there, it’s just really no place for a baby, unless you want your baby to become an alcoholic.

• I mean, technically, if you fed a baby nothing but phat sandwiches for the first few months of its life and it survived, you probably would’ve made that baby a lot stronger. • Oh come on, the people in the Big Bite are harmless. I wouldn’t let them hold my baby, but they’re harmless. • I’ve seen a baby in there before, he was quite popular.

if you weRe a PhaT saNDwich, what would you be? • I wouldn’t want to be a phat sandwich, I’d rather be a regular old burger.

• I’d be a phat awesome.

• I don’t want to be a phat anything, especially anything starting with a ‘P-H.’ Well, besides a PhD

• I’d be a phat blunt, oh wait, is that too cliché?

• I’d be a phat oh-god-why-am-I-here.

• (gesturing towards her Jewish friend) You’d be a phat dreidel!

when you walk out of biG bite, do you feel PosiTive eNergy? • I feel ready for the night, but definitely not ready for the day. Being ready for the day and ready for the night are two very different things. • There’s a chance I might poo my pants at 4 a.m.

• I don’t think I’ll be feeling full for long. I don’t mean that in an alcohol way. Or maybe I do? • Big Bite makes my dreams come true.

doeS biG bite eXisT DuriNg The Day? • Come to think of it, I have no feasible proof that Big Bite actually exists during the day. For all I know, it might just evaporate as soon as the sun comes out. • Shit, is it even open during the day? • I mean, the average time I end up at Big Bite is, like, three in the morning, so that says something.

• During the day Big Bite is just a store, it’s actually kinda quaint. I prefer my Big Bite experience with less debauchery. • You’re a lot less likely to step in poop during the day, that’s for sure.

if you ate biG bite beFore your TesT, how do you think youR PeRfoRmance would be affected? • Big Bite would make me doubt my major.

• I don’t know, I think eating at Big Bite before a test would make me realize how little I really do care about non-sciencemajor Astronomy.

• I once did eat Big Bite before a test, I’m pretty sure I ended up Q-dropping that class.

• Seeing what life might be like stuck working in a fucking Big Bite kinda motivates me to do even better on my test.

• I don’t think I could make it to class after eating a bunch of Big Bite. | September 28, 2011


Organic electricity Wave Hands Like Clouds explore the intersection of technology, nature, and reality When people think ABOUT music in Austin, they’re probably thinking rock music. The effigy of Stevie Ray Vaughan and the Gibson art guitars peppered throughout the city attest to this. However, some Austin musicians choose to bypass those tired strings and worn-out snare drums, exploring the textures and possibilities that samplers, computers, and keyboards can yield. Austin’s own Wave Hands Like Clouds are doing just this. The group mixes hip-hop and electronic sensibilities with a penchant for psychedelic exploration. Producers like Flying Lotus, Four Tet, and Boards of Canada are solid grounding points. One of the pleasures of Waves Hands’ sound is the organic quality of their music; the pinging of rocks, the crackling of leaves, and samples of brooks all exist comfortably and interact with the more electronic elements. “I think that technology is nature,” said Wave Hands member Tyler Norton. “I try to use technology, musically speaking, to be more aligned with natural patterns and behaviors.” Likewise, the group’s belief that the natural world is not that far distant from the one made up of circuits and electricity is quite apparent in their sound. “We both see technology as a very natural thing, so I think that perspective greatly affects the overall sound we produce,” said Wave Hands member Aaron Oberlin. “Sometimes certain natural sounds are sampled and put in certain places for cinematic effect or

“I try to use technology, musically speaking,

to be more aligned

emotive response, but I think more often our end result just ends up with organic overtones.” Unlike rock ’n’ roll, electronic music, for the most part, has never lacked in its spiritual convictions. From the rave to the disorientation of dance music, electronic music typically has a much better tendency to alter consciousness than rock music. Wave Hands definitely try and induce this sense of an “altered zone” in their listeners and themselves. “Wave Hands is, to me, about sonic alchemy,” said Norton. “I try to take a simple group of sounds and rapidly evolve them to a collection of vibrations that allows me to feel energetically balanced while simultaneously propelled

with natural patterns and behaviors.”


September 28, 2011 |

towards new sounds, ideas, art, etc.” Indeed, Wave Hands’ metaphysical inclinations have never been more apparent than on their new EP. Sampled voices regarding god sync up with their time-rattling beats and other looping instruments. “We had both been having a lot of very existential discussions about the nature of reality and about the ramifications of expanding consciousness,” said Oberlin. “I think those discussions were eventually just taken over to the world of song creation.”

William Bass

Check out the new Wave Hands Like Clouds EP at www.wavehandslikeclouds.

ARRYN ZECH Netflix, Qwikster, and YOU Everyone knows that Netflix has divided itself into two different companies. If you don’t, you either live under a rock or you don’t have Netflix. The deal is, now that it’s separated into two companies, Netflix will still stream movies and TV shows through your PC or console while Qwikster is the place where you have your favorite movies and TV shows shipped to your house. Two companies, two websites, two bills. It’s a bummer, but it’s worth the extra ten bucks a month to get unlimited shows every month. The redeeming factor: Qwkister also offers unlimited video games by mail. So instead of a Netflix, Qwikster, and GameFly account, now all you need is a Netflix and a Qwikster account. Two is always better than three. Right?

Gamers are good at science Through a microscope, an enzyme would only look like a big mess of tangled spaghetti, but because of a group of fantastic nerds, the science world has had a major break through. The enzymes called retroviral proteases play a critical role in how the AIDS virus matures and proliferates. The only problem was, scientists didn’t know what the enzyme actually looked like. To help solve this problem, a group of nerds were employed. “We wanted to see if human intuition could succeed where automated methods had failed,” said Dr. Firas Khatib of the University of Washington Department of Biochemistry. The gamers successfully solved the structure of the enzyme

with the help of a program called Foldit in just three weeks. The structure of this enzyme had baffled scientists for a decade. Figuring out the structure of an enzyme is vital. It gives scientists a better understanding of the possible causes of many diseases, as well as give clues for drugs to counteract it. There you have it: Gamers save science. Again.

The End of Deathwing World of Warcraft lovers, the time has come for the last patch of Cataclysm to arrive. Soon, patch 4.3 of Cataclysm will be out in the world and it will be up to you and your guild to lead the World of Warcraft to victory in destroying the giant dragon, Deathwing. One of the new things to expect with this new patch are transmogrification, where you have the opportunity to change and customize the look of the gear that you have equipped into old gear in your storage. With that in mind, you’ll now be able to hold more items, including your cool new tricked-out armor, in a special long-term storage unit called the Void Storage. What is a good patch without a good Faire? Patch 4.3 brings you the new and improved Darkmoon Faire, complete with it’s own entrance archway sporting the Eye of Sauron. You’d better enjoy your time there, or shit in Mordor is going down. The finale of this expansion doesn’t end anti-climactically with just your average WoW boss battle. Game Director Tom

Time Carousel Outside of time and space, the Carousel Lounge operates on its own terms The things that are strange, anachronistic, or that time has simply forgotten are increasingly difficult to seek out in Austin. Development and the economy usually have a hard time preserving those things that don’t follow either the rules or fads. Luckily, there is a place that has managed to stay alive amidst these two forces of change: the Carousel Lounge. Located just east of the highway on 52nd St, the Carousel Lounge is a world unto itself. Carousels, giant pink elephants, and phone booths stalk the patrons like ghosts from a haunted past. In addition to its disconcerting decor, Carousel is one of the last set-up bars in Austin, meaning you can bring your own liquor! Moreover, while most bars around town are still getting their sea legs, Carousel has seen its fair share of Austin’s colorful history since opening in 1963. At the same time, the place has been carving out its own weird narrative of eccentric regulars, scantily

dressed Christian bartenders, and legendary blind piano players. “There has been a lot of local history here; it has been a place where a lot of bands around town have played their first gigs,” said bartender Chris Douthitt. One of the main appeals of this storied venue is its timelessness. Upon crossing the threshold of Carousel, all notions of time seem to be immediately obliterated by the insular nature of the place. If it weren’t for the TVs on the wall, the fact that it is 2011 would seem unbelievable. “When you’re here you don’t know if it’s1963 outside or if

Chilton spoke with, and according to him, “Deathwing doesn’t just kind of sit around. He doesn’t have a throne to chill on, just waiting for people to show up and throw down the gauntlet.” So, expect a pretty intense ending with this patch. The biggest addition in this patch are the three new fiveman instances to run through with friends, as well as the final battle with Deathwing. That battle will involve players hopping not only all around Azeroth itself, but into its past (again) as well as its future, “ultimately climaxing on the dragon’s back.” (Doesn’t it just sound like you’re having an epic sex party on the back of a dragon? How cool would that be?)

Arryn Zech

it’s 2011,” said Douthitt. “I think that sense of being in a time trap is what really appeals to people.” Likewise, the Carousel has been operating on its own terms since opening. Fashions, taste, trends and all notions of history seem to fall by the wayside as its circus-themed decor isn’t trying to impress anyone or prove anything. “We’re definitely not chasing any trends or trying to draw a certain crowd,” said owner Nicki Mebane. “It is sort of a no-frills place.” Carousel Lounge is located on 1110 E. 52nd St. Visit for more information.

William Bass Looking for a place for your band to play? The Carousel’s liberal booking policy is always open to new acts, young and old. Contact Nicki at for more information on how to get a show there

Don’t be a creep Or a weirdo either, for that matter When it comes to dating advice, “don’t be creepy” is a pretty good place to start. Yet for many men and women, the social rules that come naturally to “normal” people are as confusing and frustrating as Calculus is to non-math majors. When the socially awkward try to pursue someone romantically, their good intentions and persistence run afoul of social etiquette, and instead of appearing sweet or thoughtful, they come off as creeps. Big fucking creeps. Graham Mitchell, a computer science teacher at Leander High School, used to be a creep. But now he’s overcome it and moved on, and he uses his personal experience with the creep mindset to help others avoid the blunders and misunderstandings that create creepiness by giving talks like the upcoming “How Not to Be Creepy: Ways to Raise Your Social Status” (see sidebar for details). “I was a late bloomer socially, I guess is the most charitable way you could put it,” said Mitchell. Though he had female friends in high school and college, it wasn’t until his until his mid-twenties that he grasped the unwritten rules of human interaction that had previously been stifling his dating life. “I didn’t used to know the social norms, the

“Another thing for maybe creeps specifically, as opposed to just nerds or the socially awkward, is the belief that if someone doesn’t like me, I can win them over they way I do in the movies.” 22

September 28, 2011 |

social rules,” said Mitchell. “I now know them and I know them in a way that normal people don’t because normal people pick them up as they grow up naturally, natively. I didn’t. I learned them like you learn Spanish.” Though he said creeps exist throughout the population, Mitchell, who received his bachelor’s in computer science from UT in 1997, admits that the socially awkward tend to congregate in certain disciplines. “Computer science and engineering is more about what works, and less about what we would like it to be,” said Mitchell. “I think that people who are socially awkward, they maybe don’t succeed in advertising because they have to deal with human variables, where as when you have to deal with something more mechanical like physics or mathematics, you’re able to thrive in that environment.” Since the public education system often discourages women from pursuing math and science, fields like engineering and computer science tend to feature a heavily skewed malefemale ratio. But that’s been changing in recent years and students like Paul, a civil engineering major working on his PhD, said that associating creeps with engineering is flawed. “I think it’s a misconception that they’re only majoring in engineering and math,” said Paul. “But at the same time, people who lack social skills have a tendency to get into engineering because they might prefer to focus on studying over socializing.” Despite majoring in a field with a disproportionately sized male population, where you might find the occasional creep, Paul said it hasn’t really affected his dating life because social mixing isn’t limited by majors. “Just because our classes were mainly male didn’t prevent us from meeting females,” said Paul. “[At UT] we have a tailgating group of civil engineering grad students, but they bring friends and so you get to meet people.” When talking to college audiences however, Mitchell’s talks go over more than just not creeping out girls. Even in highly technical fields, interacting with coworkers and management, without making them feel uneasy, is a crucial skill. “Their core flaw is undervaluing politeness,” said Mitchell. Mitchell continued, saying that the problem creeps tend to have with

socializing is failing to understand that just because something is true, doesn’t mean it won’t have emotional consequences for the person hearing. “Another thing for maybe creeps specifically, as opposed to just nerds or the socially awkward, is the belief that if someone doesn’t like me, I can win them over they way I do in the movies,” said Mitchell. Romantic gestures only work when the other person is interested. If someone likes you back, sending them flowers is sweet. If the object of your af fection doesn’t even know your name, showing up at their house at 2 a.m. with a boombox

Lloyd Dobbler-style isn’t cute, it ’s creepy. Super fucking creepy.

Devon Tincknell

“How Not to Be Creepy: Ways to Raise Your Social Status” location: UT - Welch 2.246 time: 6:00pm sponsored by Yelp and WICS Wednesday, September 28, 2011

Can you spot an abusive relationship? It’s hard to watch TV today without being bombarded by emotionally, verbally and sometimes physically abusive relationships. Whether it’s watching the catty, backstabbing banter between frenemies on shows like “The Real Housewives of Whereverthehell” or watching Ron and Sammie tear each others’ rooms apart on “Jersey Shore,” one thing is certain: dysfunctional relationships make for good ratings. While there are ups and downs in any relationship, the line between abusive and healthy is distinct. Here are a few warning signs to watch out for so you can tell the difference between a healthy relationship and an abusive one:

Do shows like “Jersey Shore” and “The Real World” promote abusive relationships?

“A healthy relationship is one where there’s a mutual happiness.”

Emotional Abuse: Isolation:


It’s normal to want to bask in the glow of your adoring boyfriend or girlfriend 24/7, but make sure to balance it out with some time with friends and some time to yourself. If your significant other somehow convinces you to give the majority of your free time to them and only them, you’re walking the isolation tight rope. Remember, you had a life before you met them, so you should continue it within the context of the relationship.

It’s nice to be fussed over, but when you can’t seem to do anything right, that’s a problem. Their problem. Your partner obviously can’t accept you for how you are if they are nitpicking at every turn. It’s possible to love someone and not like them for who they are. If your partner is constantly correcting your speech or behavior, it’s possible that they may love you but not like you. Learn the difference.

Keeping Score/Making a Case: When a partner starts bringing up past “sacrifices” on their part to get you to do something you don’t want to do, it’s manipulation. They don’t have to do anything they are uncomfortable with and neither do you. When your partner starts to make a case as to why you should or shouldn’t do something, make sure you check your gut first.

Come Here, Go Away: The back and forth of a love relationship can be tricky, but when it starts to become a powerplay (however subconscious), it’s damaging. In order to protect their vulnerabilities, some people draw their loved ones close then push them away. This creates confusion on the part of the subject, then ignites within them a desire to win the beloved’s affections for good. Don’t be fooled; the heart they are protecting isn’t worth it.

Verbal Abuse:

Physical Abuse: Mock Fighting: Common in heterosexual relationships, this is typically when men “play fight” with their girlfriends usually in front of friends or family. This allows the dominant partner to aggressively assert their superiority while masking it in a playful manner. This can be very damaging to the receiving partner’s sense of esteem or equality within the partnership. This includes pinching, punching, wrestling or slapping (we’ll let nuggies slide on this one).

Breaking Dishes: An MTV favorite. It seems that in most reality shows, broken dishes are part of the gig, but make no mistake about it: If ANYTHING is thrown, broken or shattered, this is physical abuse. You should always feel physically safe in your relationship, especially when arguing.

F*ck You, Bitch:

How to Assert Your Boundaries:

This is one of the more obvious signs of abuse. If either you or your partner uses foul language, calls names or uses belittling language, it needs to stop. Adults have the cognitive capacity to express their anger or dissatisfaction in respectful ways, so you should too.

Journalism junior Marisa Vasquez thinks that “a healthy relationship is one where there’s a mutual happiness.” She also adds that “it’s still abuse if it’s emotionally damaging.” While it’s perfectly normal to have your heart maimed while pursuing love, there is a line between love and war.

Stop It Before It Starts: Put your foot down from the beginning and be 100% willing to walk away from anyone who doesn’t treat you with the respect that you deserve. This will show them that you respect yourself and are not willing to tolerate their BS. More than likely, they will find this kind of personal power even more attractive and fall for you all the more!

Start Small: If you’ve found yourself in a damaging relationship, but want to try to work it out, start small but be clear. Pick one concrete thing to focus on and address it. Within time, you and your partner can have an open dialogue and understanding of the expectations and needs of your relationship. Don’t forget, you could always take a class on assertiveness.

Amanda Chappel

Poll Do you think Ron and Sam from “the Jersey Shore” Have an Abusive Relationship?

Yes: 30% (10) No: 3% (1) Maybe: 6% (2) Don’t watch the Show: 61% (20) | September 28, 2011




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Este Vato Fusing it all together Este Vato started as an idea in early 2008 by brothers Rocky and Oscar Reyna. With the recruitment of Ricardo Lara, Feliciano “Chano” Lopez, Rey Trevino, Rene Chavez and Frank “FAAR” Ramirez, the seven members blend everyone’s different musical influences and backgrounds to create the sound they define as “Latino-fusion.” There’s hip-hop. There’s reggae. There’s cumbia. Vocalist Lara and emcee Lopez incorporate English and Spanish in their lyrics. And people take notice. They released the self-titled EP in February 2010 and have performed at notable local music festivals such as Pecan Street Festival, Viva La Viva Fest and Pachanga Latino Music Festival attracting fans from all walks of life. Drummer Ramirez chatted with UWeekly about how the members make a seven-piece band work and their upcoming show with three-time Grammy-winning Molotov on Sept. 29 at the new Emo’s East. With seven members, how does scheduling work? Well it’s pretty difficult. Practice, we usually always have it on the same day, which is Wednesday so everybody knows to keep their schedule clear on that. Then when shows come up, we have to email, text, call everybody and wait for responses and all that kind of stuff to make sure we’re good to go.

because it just comes naturally somehow. Do you think there’s a common type of music that you’re drawn to? Because with all of your influences, this could have gone completely out of control with writing. We talk a lot, just about the music and about bands. “Have you heard this band?” We share music with each other and do

“I really feel like there’s something for everyone, something that everyone likes and they can find in our music.” How does writing work? I read that you all come from different influences and it shows in the music. How do you wrangle all those influences together to form Este Vato? To me, it’s very unusual that we’re able to do that, but usually when we’re writing in practice, someone will bring an idea and we usually start with that. Then everybody contributes from there, but that’s pretty much it. Like I’ve said, I’ve been in several bands and it’s not always that easy to do that. People can be egotistical sometimes, but not in this case

that kind of stuff. So I think in a way, we do all like our separate stuff but we do all listen to the similar bands together as a group too. So in a way, it does guide us and keep us from getting too far out there, I guess. You’re opening for Molotov at Emo’s East. Have you been there yet? I have not been there. I haven’t been there since I played there when it was called The Backroom. I’ve seen some photos. A friend of mine showed me some photos on his phone. I guess he’s

Photo: Esta Vato // Comandante Quito

working there. I’m really excited to be there, but no I haven’t been there yet. I read in the press release I received that you were selected to perform this show. Yeah, apparently we got a call to open the show. We didn’t effectively go out there and seek it. That was a great honor and surprise and everything for us. I feel like your name is starting to get out a lot more now with your EP and playing this year’s Pachanga Fest. Right. I think towards the very beginning when we started playing, we got a lot of shows really fast and then kind of a plateau for a little bit, but ever since Pachanga Fest, it’s been climbing up again. We’re trying to keep that momentum going. What do you think attracts people to your music? Obviously, for me as a Latina, it’s just the rock world that I grew up with and my parents’ traditional cumbias. But for someone who isn’t Latino or Latina, what do you think it is that attracts them? I think it’s like what we’re talking about before, it’s just the fact that we use some of the elements: rock, hip-hop, reggae, cumbia, English and Spanish lyrics. So I really feel like there’s something for everyone, something that everyone likes and they can find in our music. I think that’s one of our

biggest things that draw people to us. So with recording, you haven’t released anything since 2010. Is there anything in the works? Well we’re finishing up these tracks that we’re going to release at the Molotov show. We’ll have it available on CD, an unlimited edition, and we’ll have it available for download, for purchasing online. I think we are definitely looking to do a full album, so we haven’t really gotten the details worked out exactly for that. But that’s definitely, I think, coming up next. So you’re kind of using this show as a release for new songs? Right. The CD that we’re going to have coming out is going to have three songs on it, but they’re all newer songs that we haven’t recorded before. We’ve played them live definitely, but never been recorded in the studio. But yeah, it’ll be new music and we’re just trying to take advantage of the audience, the Molotov fans that will be there that probably wouldn’t have heard of us otherwise. So we’re going to have something for the people to take home with them if they like us.


ESTE VATO will be playing at Emo’s on Thursday, Sept. 29 with Molotov. Doors at 9pm, tickets $28 at | September 28, 2011



Bill Callahan & Mother Falcon @ Mohawk, 912 Red River

While most of us live rather comfortable lives in the bubble of our university existence, 1 in 5 Austinites are living in poverty. Well, it’s about time we put our city’s passions—drinking and live music—to work for a cause. Local songwriter Bill Callahan will team up with noted orchestral pop group Mother Falcon for a night of amazing music, drinking, and charity. All proceeds from the event will go towards


Les Savy Fav @ Mohawk, 912 Red River

Crazier than any metal band, catchier than any dance-punk band, and more outrageous than Lady Gaga’s dog. Those might seem far-fetched when describing an indie rock band, but not so in the case of Les Savy Fav. These guys have been at this stuff for over ten years now, and it shows in their outrageous live shows and their can’t-get-you-out-of-my-head songs. Tickets:

A Lady Gaga burlesque & variety show @ Highball, 1120 S Lamar

You are invited to put on your fancy pants and join the rest of the little monsters for Gagarazzi: A Lady Gaga-themed burlesque and variety show, benefiting Equality Texas. The Highball is hosting this fabulous evening of filthy pop as noted burlesque stars from Austin and San Antonio will shake and shimmy their things. After the performances the stage will open up to the dance floor that you have been dreaming about. Come dressed to impress. Austin will never go Gaga like this again.

►►Also Worthy

►►Also Worthy

►►Also Worthy


No Shame Sing Along

The Script

Rayon Beach



Lady’s Ride Night


Dixie Witch

Mau Mau Chaplains

A Comedy Mixtape

Bobby Jealousy

Free Improv!

Whiskey Shivers

Blasted Engines

Waterloo Records, 600 N Lamar Beerland, 711 Red River Fast Folk’s Cyclery, 1105 E 6th Flamingo Cantina, 515 E 6th ColdTowne Theatre, 4803 Airport

Will bass 28


Tickets: At the door


The top events & shows in Austin this week


September 21, 2011 |

Alamo Ritz, 320 E 6th

Stubb’s, 601 Red River Plush, 617 Red River The New Movement Theater, 1819 Rosewood Ave Beerland, 711 Red River

Stubb’s, 601 Red River Antone’s, 213 W 5th Red 7, 611 E 7th Beerland, 711 Red River Red Eyed Fly, 715 Red River




Chik Shtick @ Cap City Comedy Club, 8120 Research Blvd

Poor, trying to get your girlfriend to laugh, and have some extra canned goods to spare? Well, Mr. Cheapskatesoon-to-be-Charitable, you are in luck, as you can gain free entry to comedic bliss with only two canned goods!

►►Also Worthy

Texas Bass Drop: Run DMT @ Texas Music Theater, 120 E San Antonio (in San Marcos)

After receding from the trunks of cars into earbuds, it seems that bass is finally making a comeback. From indie bands embracing it to the ubiquitous wobble of dubstep, bass looks like it’s here to stay for a little while. Head down to San Marcos to get in touch with your inner bass as Run DMT, Crizzly, and Exceed put some bass in your face. Tickets: At the door

All Day Happy Hour: Free Play Sunday @ Kung Fu Saloon, 510 Rio Grande

What better way to work off that hang over than by playing video games and drinking more? The Kung Fu Saloon is nice enough to cure the thing that ails you with more cheap poison on Sunday. In addition, all of their vintage video games will be free. Drink, play Pac-Man, and be merry!

Rock N Roll Karaoke Beerland, 711 Red River

Lost Allegiance

Red Eyed Fly, 715 Red River

Gang Gang Dance tuesday Mohawk, 912 Red River

Austin Poetry Slam Open Mic

@ 29th Street Ballroom, 2906 Fruth St

►►Also Worthy

►►Also Worthy

Meat Puppets

Cosmic Bug Loaf

Cymbals Eat Guitars

My Education

Quin Galavis

Middle Class Rut

Mole People

Archie Powell

White Swan, 1906 E 12th

Continental Club, 1315 S Congress

Golden Boy

Capitalist Kids


Scoot Inn, 1308 E 4th Emo’s, 603 Red River

Beerland, 711 Red River Skinny’s Ballroom, 115 San Jacinto Hole in the Wall, 2538 Guadalupe

Red Eyed Fly, 715 Red River

Think you got the skills to pay the bills? Come over to the 29th Street Ballroom to embarrass yourself or prove your merit on the mic.

Mohawk, 912 Red River Emo’s, 603 Red River

Beerland, 711 Red River

►►Also Worthy

James McMurtry

Emo’s East, 2513 Riverside | September 21, 2011


Photo:shannon grant

► shaKesPeaRe’s PuB

► the lIBRaRy

314 e 6th

407 e 6th

$3 soco lime shots

$1 domestics/wells, $2 imported bottles

► PluCKeRs

► CaIn and aBel’s

2222 rio grande

2313 rio grande

mother plucker mugs

$8 32 oz. texas teas from 7pm-close

► PeCKeRheads

► MooseKnuCKle PuB

402 e 6th

406 e 6th

$3 Jager/hideous/tuaca

$2 anything

► daRWIn’s PuB

► BIKInI’s

223 e 6th

214 e 6th

$2 wells/domestics 12-9 pm

$12 beer buckets

► tRudy’s

► MotheR egan’s

409 w 30th

715 w 6th

$4.95 sangria-ritas

$3 wells til 10 pm

► MalaIa

► tInIest BaR In teXas

300 e 6th

817 w 5th

$2 domestic beers, $2 wells til 11 pm

$1 bud light/budweiser

► the gIngeR Man

► the loCal

shiNer’s salooN shIner’s on 5th is a happy little slice of “genuine Texas character” that has a little something within its walls for every Texan who walks through its doors. Even if you’re not Texan and just wish you were, that’s cool too, because Shiner’s doesn’t discriminate, as its weekly NFL ticket is open to every patron starting at 11 am with drink specials that range from $3 tall boys to $5 ritas on the rocks. And if you happen to be feeling particularly indulgent, Shiner’s kitchen is also open ‘til 2 am, with items that range from tasty mini sliders to “Western Eggrolls,” which includes grilled chicken and black beans. If it’s a honkey-tonkin’ good time you’re looking for, Shiner’s Saloon will be sure to satisfy.

BRIan BogaRt

► CuatRos

301 lavaca

2610 guadalupe

1004 w 24th

service Industry night

$2 tex-mex beers

$2 tecates and modelo esp., $5 deer and a beer

► CuBa lIBRe

► RooftoP BaR

► fRIends

409 colorado

2716 guadalupe

208 e 6th

$2 wells

$2 mimosas and $3 bloody marys

$2 vodka bombs

► KIss and fly

► BlInd PIg

► MaggIe Mae’s

404 colorado

317 e 6th

323 e 6th

$3 wells, $3 any beer

$2.50 wells/domestics

$2 wells

307B West 5th Street



2 1 ‘ R U O T PGA


S A T U R D A Y , O C T . 1 ST



Come out Saturday to the Venue on Guadalupe from 10am 5pm and take a tour of our prop erty while enjoying FREE FOOD and REFRESHMENTS!

roommate matching available - stainless steel appliances granite countertops - huge walkin closets - hardwood foors - fitness center - rooftop pool





Sign a lease this w and ge eeken t a FR d EE iPa a 42� Flat S creen d 2 or TV

T h e Ve n u e o n G u a d a l u p e . c o m

512 . 4 7 3 . 37 0 6

2 815 G u a d a l u p e S t .

September 28, 2011  
September 28, 2011  

UWeekly Austin September 28, 2011