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Southeastern Virginia | Vol. 58 No. 3 | 29 Tishrei 5780 | October 28, 2019

27 Christopher Noxon Monday, November 4

Jaffe Family Jewish Book Festival

14 Community Campaign Kickoff 2020

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Four congressmen call out Twitter for allowing Hamas and Hezbollah on the platform

F

our Congress members have called out Twitter for allowing Hamas and Hezbollah to maintain a presence on the social media platform. Reps. Josh Gottheimer, D-N.J.; Tom Reed, R-N.Y.; Max Rose, D-N.Y.; and Brian Fitzpatrick, R-Pa., wrote in a letter to Twitter CEO Jack Dorsey that they were alarmed to learn that Twitter “draws a distinction between the political and military factions of these organizations,” quoting from Twitter’s initial response to their concerns. The congressmen said in their letter that the distinction “is not meaningful nor is it widely shared,” noting that Hezbollah and Hamas are designated as terrorist organizations by the U.S. government. At a news conference, Rose, Reed and Gottheimer said they are pushing the company to take down the Hezbollah and Hamas content by Nov. 1. A Twitter official had written to the lawmakers last month. “There is no place on Twitter for terrorist organizations, violent extremist groups, or individuals who affiliate with and promote their illicit activities,” Carlos Monje Jr., the director of public policy and philanthropy for the United States and Canada, said in a letter. “We assess organizations and individuals under our violent extremist group criteria and are additionally informed by national and international terrorism designations,” said Monie. “If you believe that Twitter is better at determining violent extremist content than the United States Government’s interagency process,” the congressmen wrote, “then we urge you to come testify before Congress to explain your own process and how it differs from that of the State and Treasury Departments.” The lawmakers noted that other social media companies including Facebook and Google “have taken proactive measures to address the presence of FTO (Foreign Terrorist Organizations) and affiliated accounts and content on their platforms.” (JTA)

Benny Gantz to get chance to form government

Published 21 times a year by United Jewish Federation of Tidewater.

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JERUSALEM (JTA)—Israeli President Reuven Rivlin officially asked Benny Gantz to form a government, with a third election in less than a year looming. It will mark the first time in more than a decade that someone other than Benjamin Netanyahu will attempt to form a government. The prime minister returned the mandate to Rivlin, saying he was unable to form a majority government coalition. Rivlin gave the mandate to Gantz, head of the Blue and White faction, on Wednesday, Oct. 23 at the president’s office in Jerusalem. Gantz will have 28 days to try to form a government coalition. If he fails, Knesset members have 21 days to advise Rivlin of their support for another lawmaker to form a government, and Rivlin could task a third person with the mandate. If that fails, Israel will go to another national election, in March. Netanyahu could not form a government after voting in April, leading to a new election in September and the latest effort to make a coalition. Netanyahu and Gantz failed in their attempts to form a unity government. Along with the mandate, Gantz will receive a security detail from the state.

Reba and Sam Sandler Family Campus of the Tidewater Jewish Community 5000 Corporate Woods Drive, Suite 200 Virginia Beach, Virginia 23462-4370 voice 757-965-6100 • fax 757-965-6102 email news@ujft.org Terri Denison, Editor Germaine Clair, Art Director Lisa Richmon, Staff Writer Sandy Goldberg, Account Executive Ronnie Jacobs Cohen, Account Executive Marilyn Cerase, Subscription Manager Reba Karp, Editor Emeritus United Jewish Federation of Tidewater Amy Levy, President Alvin Wall, Treasurer Stephanie Calliott, Secretary Betty Ann Levin, Executive Vice-President jewishVA.org The appearance of advertising in the Jewish News does not constitute a kashrut, political, product or service endorsement. The articles and letters appearing herein are not necessarily the opinion of this newspaper. © 2019 Jewish News. All rights reserved. Subscription: $18 per year

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Candle Lighting

Quotable

Contents

Friday, November 1/3 Cheshvan Light candles at 5:50 pm

Upfront. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 3

Special Section: Mazel Tov. . . . . . . . . . . 15

Briefs. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 4

Christopher Noxon at Jaffe Jewish Book Festival . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 27

“Having young community

Lee & Bernard Jaffe Family Jewish Book Festival . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 28

members involved in the efforts

Anti-Semitism is a problem in U.S.. . . . . 8 Sheryl Sandberg pledges $2.5 mil to ADL. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 9 Saying Goodbye. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 10 JFS food drive delivers. . . . . . . . . . . . . . 12 OST’s newest students get goofy . . . . . . 12

What’s Happening . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 32 Calendar. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 35

Obituaries . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 36

Friday, November 8/10 Cheshvan Light candles at 4:43 pm

of Super Sunday will help insure

Friday, November 15/17 Cheshvan Light candles at 4:38 pm

our community’s future is bright!”

Friday, November 22/24 Cheshvan Light candles at 4:34 pm

—page 35

Friday, November 29/1 Kislev Light candles at 4:31 pm

Ambassador kicks off Community Campaign: 2020 Vision . . . . . . . . . . . 14

jewishnewsva.org | October 28, 2019 | Jewish News | 3


BRIEFS Israel: Largest delegation ever to 2020 Olympic Games Israel will send its largest delegation ever for the 2020 Olympic Games in Tokyo. Team Israel will include about 85 athletes in 18 sports for the quadrennial event in July, NoCamels first reported. Israeli athletes will compete for the first time in equestrian show jumping and surfing. Other sports include rhythmic and artistic gymnastics, cycling, sailing and shooting. “This is a crazy number by Israeli standards,” Vered Buskila, vice president of the Olympic Committee of Israel, told NoCamels. “That’s something that we never thought could happen in the near future.” Two dozen of the participants make up the national baseball team, which last month became the second of six teams to qualify. Israel has won nine Olympic medals since it first began competing in 1952, starting with Yael Arad’s silver in judo in 1992. (JTA) Pennsylvania gov. orders flags half-staff for synagogue attack anniversary Pennsylvania Gov. Tom Wolf signed a proclamation calling for a day of remembrance and ordering state flags to half-staff to mark the one-year anniversary of the attack on the Tree of Life synagogue building that left 11 worshippers dead. The proclamation extends the City of Pittsburgh’s resolution declaring the day “Remember Repair Together Day” statewide to include the whole state. It also orders the state flag on all commonwealth facilities, public buildings and grounds to half-staff from sunrise until sunset on Oct. 27, 2019, the one-year anniversary of the attack. The United States flag will remain at full-staff. “A year has passed, but I continue to carry sorrow for the victims and their families of this heinous attack,” Wolf said when he signed the proclamation. “We must honor them by remembering, and through our thoughts, prayers and actions. I ask all Pennsylvanians to spend Oct. 27 doing the same in their honor.” Wolf honored the 11 victims of the attack last month while on a visit to

Auschwitz, including writing their names in the memorial site’s guestbook. “My visits to Holocaust sites reaffirmed my belief that we need to work every day to stop anti-Semitism and hate from growing in Pennsylvania,” Wolf also said. “By reaching out to cultivate bonds of friendship and understanding, we observe the one-year mark of the attack at Tree of Life with action that helps strengthen our commonwealth and prevent hate from growing.” (JTA)

Zubin Mehta conducts Israel Philharmonic Orchestra for final time as music director Conductor Zubin Mehta conducted the Israel Philharmonic Orchestra for the final time as its musical director. Mehta, 83, performed with the Orchestra this month in Tel Aviv and was honored with an extended standing ovation. Members of the orchestra threw flowers on the conductor and his wife at the end of the concert. The final performance included Liszt’s Piano Concerto No. 2 and Mahler’s Symphony No. 2. He will be succeeded by Lahav Shani, 30. Shani and pianist Yefim Bronfman appeared on-stage and performed a duet. Mehta, who announced in 2016 that he would retire at the end of this season, was named the orchestra’s musical director emeritus. He was named the orchestra’s music advisor in 1969 and its music director in 1977. He became its music director for life in 1981. He also served as music director of the Los Angeles Philharmonic from 1962 to 1978 and was music director of the New York Philharmonic from 1978 to 1991. Mehta was born in Bombay, India. His father, Mehli Mehta, was the founder of the Bombay Symphony. (JTA) Anti-Semitic hate crimes nearly doubled in England in 2018 The number of religion-based hate crimes against Jews in England and Wales nearly doubled last year, according to a government report. The data from a Home Office report lists 1,326 anti-Semitic incidents in 2018, or 18 percent of the overall number of

4 | Jewish News | October 28, 2019 | jewishnewsva.org

hate crimes—almost twice as many as the 672 anti-Semitic incidents recorded in the previous year. The overall number of religion-oriented hate crimes rose by 31 percent, to 7,446 from 5,680, the Hate Crime, England and Wales, 2018–19 report shows. The proportion of anti-Semitic attacks also climbed 12 percent from 2017. Muslims were the most targeted group in both years: The overall number of anti-Muslim attacks rose to 3,530 from 2,965, though the proportion dropped to 47 percent from 52 percent. After Muslims, Jews were the most-often targeted group in both years. The Home Office classifies hate crimes against Muslims and Jews as being based on their religion rather than ethnicity. Muslims account for about 5 percent of the population in the United Kingdom, according to the Office for National Statistics, while Jews constitute about half a percent. In both years, the combined number of attacks on Christians, Sikhs and Hindus was smaller than the tally of anti-Semitic attacks. The report includes other forms of hate crimes, including those based on race and sexual orientation. The total number of all hate crimes recorded in 2018 was 103,379, a 17 percent rise over 2017. (JTA)

World’s oldest leftovers found in cave in Israel That chicken still in the fridge from a few days ago not so appealing? Try these leftovers: They may go back 420,000 years! Researchers have found deer bone remnants inside an Israeli cave about seven miles from Tel Aviv that are being called the world’s oldest leftovers. Humans would save the bones to eat the marrow inside, according to the researchers, who are affiliated with universities in Israel, Spain and Switzerland. The remnants in Qesem Cave are “the earliest evidence for storage and delayed consumption of bone marrow,” according to the researchers. An article published earlier this month in Science Advances details the findings, which are from about 200,000–420,000

years ago. The marrow could be stored for nine weeks with only a low rate of degradation, according to the findings. (JTA)

Who by fire: 38,000 pounds of bagels burnt in truck days before Yom Kippur Midwest Jews needed to find something else to eat when Yom Kippur ended—tons of their bagels turned to toast. Some 38,000 pounds of frozen bagels met an unhappy fate just a couple of days ahead of the Jewish Day of Atonement, when they were burnt to a crisp in a truck fire. An Indiana state trooper noticed that a semi heading north on I-65, about 90 miles southeast of Chicago, was smoking heavily from the rear axle, according to a news release from the Indiana State Police. The trooper pulled over the truck, but it was too late: The fire was spreading to the trailer, and the rear tires exploded, burning the break-fast staple. The driver, a Floridian, was unharmed. A Chicagoarea company owned the truck. The news release did not say where the bagels were from or where they were going, but it’s safe to say that as the holiest day of the Jewish year approached, some of them became dust and ashes. (JTA) Snoop Dogg will promote Israeli cannabis tech startup Snoop Dogg, an outspoken advocate of marijuana use, is the new brand representative for an Israeli cannabis tech startup. Seedo, based in Yokneam in northern Israel, sells an automatic hydroponic growing machine for herbs and vegetables that is used for growing cannabis. Snoop Dogg has joined Seedo “to educate consumers on the environmental benefits and social opportunity of Seedo’s home and commercial grow technology,” the company said. The American rapper will contribute to a social responsibility program that will share Seedo’s growing practices and provide donated Seedo products for local communities, neighborhood organizations and influencers. The initiative will start in his hometown of Long Beach, California, according to the company. ( JTA)


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SAN FRANCISCO (J. The Jewish News of Northern California via JTA)—Typically, Jews gather after Rosh Hashanah services to recite a brief prayer and then symbolically cast away their sins by tossing breadcrumbs into a body of water. The ritual, called tashlich, isn’t mandated by Jewish law—it’s just a popular folk ritual. But its simplicity and symbolism have kept it popular for centuries. Now Stanford students have created an otherworldly twist on the act: they call it Tashlich in Space—and it’s pretty self-explanatory. That’s right, this year you can (belatedly) send your sins up into the Earth’s atmosphere on an honest-to-God rocket, thanks to the ingenuity of Hillel at Stanford and Stanford’s Student Space Initiative. Technically, admits Stanford junior Daniel Shorr, it’s not really space. Space begins at the Kármán line 62 miles up. Your sins are only destined for about 4,000 feet. At that altitude, you still get birds. So not even close to space. But they will definitely ascend in a rocket, which is still pretty cool. The program’s website puts it succinctly: “Reflect. Renew. Blastoff.” The Student Space Initiative is a Stanford University club that allows students with an interest in space to get together and work on practical projects. “We do experiments in low-Earth orbit or compete with other universities. You don’t need any background to join,” Shorr says. Hillel assistant director Jeremy Ragent approached Shorr about collaborating as part of a series of projects mixing Stanford expertise with Jewish content. “We did a project with cameras on top of a bike helmet and reading Talmud about protecting your body. Stuff like that,” Ragent says.

He and Shorr talked about ways Hillel and the Student Space Initiative could collaborate. “Certainly, tashlich in space is something new for us,” Ragent adds, “and hopefully will open the door to all kinds of cool collaboration.” Here’s how it works: Go to the project’s online form, submit your sins (securely— no one will read them), and they’ll be put on a small SD storage card along with some breadcrumbs in a 5-foot rocket built by Shorr. In a normal tashlich, your sins go away. In this case, they’ll come back down in the recoverable section of the rocket. “We don’t know what state they’ll be in or whether we’ll find it, but it will likely come back,” Shorr says. “It’s a heightened version of the embodied practice we do down on Earth,” says Ragent. “We hope there’s a cathartic release in seeing this blastoff happening. You can only throw bread so far.” Shorr has always been interested in space, but his connection with Judaism is more recent. Though his family is Jewish, he grew up in China with very little Jewish content in his life. It wasn’t until he got involved with Hillel at Stanford that he became actively Jewish. He feels a tension between Jewish observance and his non-Jewish interests. “This was a way to have that crossover happen in a way that felt organic and genuine,” he says. “I want something to ground me when I think about going out there as far from the ground as possible.” The launch will occur sometime in November, depending on a variety of factors. In the future, Shorr wants to follow up with a rocket that will go to 30,000 feet. “We’re also working on a space shot, to about 350,000 feet, actual space,” he says. “And we’re looking forward to maybe a Hillel payload on that one as well.” Add your confession to this year’s launch here.


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with the political, social, and humanitarian consequences of ultimately leading Israel into another devastating and unpopular war, similar to the 2006 Lebanon War. What the reader will find fascinating is the weaving of Israel’s history into the story. It discusses the 1981 bombing of the Osiris Nuclear Facility in Iraq. It discusses the ever relevant political alliance with the United States, and how the personal relationship between Prime Minister Ehud Olmert and then U.S. President George W. Bush helped the final outcome. It discusses in detail about the continuous confrontation between Syria and Israel, and how in 2007 that played into Olmert’s decision making and Assad’s eventual response. And finally, it discusses how that decision has made such an impact to the safety and security of Israel today. Ultimately, it will give the reader the background and understanding of Israel’s recent actions in Syria that are at the heart of the defense of Israel and insider understanding of the decisions that need to be made in the coming years about Iran and North Korea’s nuclear program.

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S

Facebook’s Sheryl Sandberg pledges $2.5 million to ADL

heryl Sandberg, the chief operating officer at Facebook, has pledged $2.5 million to the Anti-Defamation League to support anti-hate programs in Europe and the United States. Sandberg announced the gift on Wednesday in a post on Facebook—where else?—though she did not specify the amount. An ADL statement released minutes later said it would be $2.5 million. In her post, Sandberg said she was making the contribution in honor of her parents’ 75th birthday and had been inspired to support the ADL specifically following the shooting outside a synagogue in Germany. “A week ago, on Yom Kippur—the holiest day of the Jewish year—I was sitting in synagogue, thinking about how, earlier that day, a gunman showed up at a synagogue in Germany, hoping to kill as many Jews as he could,” Sandberg wrote. “He knew the temple would be full because of the holiday. In the end, a locked door kept him out, but he still managed to kill two people outside. Sitting in temple that day, I knew what my parents’ birthday present should be.” The ADL’s national director, Jonathan Greenblatt, said the gift comes at a “critical juncture in the fight against bigotry.” Sandberg’s post also mentioned her parents’ “horror” at rising anti-Semitism in the United States and elsewhere, including at the Tree of Life synagogue in Pittsburgh. She also noted a recent family trip to Yad Vashem, the Holocaust remembrance center in Jerusalem, as a “powerful reminder of where this hate can lead.” (JTA)

Prominent Washington synagogue vandalized

A

synagogue in Washington DC was vandalized with what is described by local Jewish agencies as “anti-Israel and hatefilled messages.” Graffiti on the Washington Hebrew Congregation was discovered earlier this month. Congregants were informed of the vandalism in an email later in the day. The Jewish Community Relations Council of Greater Washington and The Jewish Federation of Greater Washington issued a joint statement about the graffiti, which was posted on Facebook. The statement said the agencies “have been informed that at the present time there is no immediate or direct threat to our community as a result of this disturbing incident,” and that the Washington Metropolitan Police Dept. will conduct a full investigation. “As we enter Shabbat and the final days of our Fall holidays, let us remember that although we cannot outlaw hate, we must and will continue to send a strong message to the community that these hateful expressions will not be tolerated. We must continue to come together as a community to reject hate in all of its forms,” the statement also said. The prominent DC congregation was founded in 1852 and is one of the largest Reform congregations in the United States. (JTA)

8 | Jewish News | October 28, 2019 | jewishnewsva.org

Study: Most media coverage of anti-Semitism focuses on the left

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he majority of news coverage of anti-Semitism during the past year has spotlighted left-wing rhetoric as opposed to right-wing actions, according to a survey by Media Matters. The study found that 56 percent of news coverage of anti-Semitism in the 11 months following the October 2018 Pittsburgh synagogue shooting focused on anti-Semitism coming from the political left compared to 44 percent coming from the political right. Media Matters, a watchdog that largely monitors right-wing media, released the study this month. Its study also found that most media coverage of anti-Semitism focused on anti-Semitic rhetoric rather than anti-Semitic actions. According to the study, the media focused more on perceived anti-Semitic statements by Democratic Reps. Ilhan Omar and Rashida Tlaib than on the synagogue shootings in Pittsburgh and Poway, California, in April. “Media not only referenced perceived anti-Semitism on the left more often than anti-Semitism on the right, they specifically mentioned rhetoric from the left, such as comments from freshmen Reps. Ilhan Omar (D-MN) and Rashida Tlaib (D-MI) that were characterized as anti-Semitic, more often than they did anti-Semitic acts of violence and other actions from the right, such as the shootings at the Pittsburgh and Poway synagogues,” the study said. The study also found that “References to ‘anti-Semitic’ comments from Rep. Ilhan Omar (D-MN) outnumbered references to ‘anti-Semitic’ comments from President Donald Trump.” (JTA)

At least 12 white supremacists have been arrested for real threats to Jewish community since Pittsburgh attack, ADL reports

A

t least 12 white supremacists have been arrested for allegedly attacking, planning attacks against or threatening the Jewish community in the year since the attack on the Tree of Life synagogue building in Pittsburgh, the Anti-Defamation League said in a new report. Since Oct. 27, 2018, white supremacists have targeted Jewish institutions’ property on at least 50 occasions, the report said. Many apparently were inspired by previous attacks. “From the Poway synagogue attack to a religious service interrupted by shouts of ‘Heil Hitler,’ white supremacists have presented very real threats to Jews across the country,” according to the report, citing the ADL Center on Extremism research. In addition, there have been at least 30 incidents in which individuals of unknown ideology committed arson, vandalism or distributed propaganda against Jewish institutions that was anti-Semitic or generally hateful, but not explicitly white supremacist in nature, the report said. (JTA)


anti-semitism Nearly 9 in 10 American Jews say anti-Semitism is a problem in U.S. Ron Kampeas

WASHINGTON (JTA)—More than eight in 10 American Jews say that anti-Semitism has spiked in recent years and even more believe it is a problem in the United States, according to an American Jewish Committee survey. Nearly three-quarters of respondents strongly disapprove of how President Donald Trump is handling anti-Semitism and significantly more see the extreme political right as more of a serious threat to them than the extreme political left. The telephone survey of 1,283 Jewish adults conducted from Sept. 11 to Oct. 6 found that 88 percent of respondents believe that anti-Semitism was a problem: 50 percent as “somewhat of a problem” and 38 percent as a “very serious” problem. Asked if anti-Semitism had increased over the past five years, 84 percent said it had: 43 percent said a lot and 41 said somewhat. Just 2 percent of respondents said they had been victims of a physical anti-Semitic attack over the same time frame, but 23 percent said they had been the target of an anti-Semitic remark in person, by mail or over the phone, and 20 percent said they had been targeted through social media. “American Jews could not be clearer about the reality of antisemitism in the U.S.,” the American Jewish Committee’s CEO, David Harris, said in a news release Wednesday. “Our survey provides, for the first time, an in-depth assessment of American Jewish perceptions of, and experiences with, antisemitism in their own country. This hatred is real, comes from multiple sources, and is growing. It needs to be taken seriously and dealt with in a sustained, multi-pronged response.” Asked if they approve or disapprove of Trump’s handling of anti-Semitism, 72 percent said they disapprove—62 percent strongly— and 24 percent approve. Trump has spoken out forcefully at times against anti-Semitism, but also has equivocated at times, notably after the deadly neo-Nazi march in Charlottesville,

Virginia, in August 2017. He also has downplayed the threat of violent white nationalism. The president’s overall ratings saw similar numbers: 76 percent unfavorable and 22 percent favorable. The respondents mostly identified as liberal, at 56 percent, and Democrats, 53 percent. Among the others, 21 percent each identified as “middle of the road” and conservative. Fourteen percent said they were Republicans and 23 percent Independents. They were likelier to perceive a threat from the far right and radical Muslims than they did from the left. The extreme right posed a threat for 89 percent of respondents, including 49 percent who said it was very serious and 29 percent calling it moderately serious. Asked about “extremism in the name of Islam,” 85 percent said it posed a threat: 27 percent each said it was very serious and moderately serious, and 31 percent calling it slight. Asked about extremism from the extreme left, 64 percent identified a threat, with a total of 36 percent calling it very serious or moderately serious and 28 percent saying the threat is slight. The respondents seemed likelier to see the threat emerging from the far right, with 49 percent calling it very serious as opposed to 15 percent from the far left. Asked about the political parties and their responsibility for the current level of anti-Semitism, the respondents rated Republicans at 6.2 on a scale with 10 as the highest, while Democrats came in at 3.6. Nearly two-thirds of respondents were familiar or somewhat familiar with the Boycott, Divestment and Sanctions movement targeting Israel. Twenty-four percent said they were not at all familiar with BDS. Of the 1,013 respondents who had at least some familiarity with the movement, 35 percent characterized it as “mostly anti-Semitic,” 47 percent said it had “some anti-Semitic supporters” and 14 percent said it was not anti-Semitic. Asked to characterize the statement “Israel has no right to exist,” 84 percent

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of PD-adC-3 respondents said News-Ira it wasSteingold-111617.indd anti-Semitic. eighths V-Jewish They also were asked about two other statements: “The U.S. government only supports Israel because of Jewish money” and “American Jews are more loyal to Israel than to America.” The former was seen as anti-Semitic by 80 percent and the latter by 73 percent. Asked if they “avoid certain places, events, or situations out of concern for your safety or comfort as a Jew,” 25 percent of respondents said they did, while 31 percent said they avoided “Publicly wearing, carrying, or displaying things that might help people identify you as a Jew.”

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The survey did not break11/16/17 down3:40 those PM numbers to assess whether the core issue was safety or comfort, nor did it place the question in a time frame. There are factors not having to do with anti-Semitism that inhibit Jewish participation in certain things—many Orthodox Jews, for instance, will not enter a church because of religious prohibitions. Notably, just 5 percent avoided “Visiting Jewish institutions or participating in Jewish events because you would not feel safe there.” The AJC said the survey, conducted by SSRS, had a margin of error of 4.2 percentage points.

jewishnewsva.org | October 28, 2019 | Jewish News | 9


first person

Saying Good-bye Lisa Bertini

We buried my dad in March. I didn’t know that we buried a piece of Mom too. Sylva was always elegant—in that Grace Kelly way. Not sexy like Sophia Loren…but always coiffed, polite, and ironed. All things her three daughters rebelled against, but loved about her. I remember all 20 of those summers at our deli in Ocean City, New Jersey—how she looked completely non-pulsed making hoagies and answering questions on how long to boil the meat filled versus the cheese filled tortellini or how many olives you actually get in a pint of olive salad. She smiled softly as she tilted her head and spoke in her lilting Italian laced accent. Not Philadelphia American Italian either, not my mom…real Northern Italian musical gorgeousness. It so annoyed me that

these Stepford wife customers talked to her like she was a little Italian doll. My mom was a beast. I knew at nine that here was a CEO somewhere buried in there and yet, she pandered to the customer’s every need. To this day, when I ask to have my turkey sliced thinly, I gristle when I get attitude from the deli clerk. “The customer is always right,” she repeated that like a mantra…with that delightful musical voice and a wink from her intense hazel eyes. She had come to America as a 15-yearold refugee of war, with her parents and younger brother by her side. Her father, Tony, with $100 to his name, moved them from Ellis Island to the chicken farms of Vineland, N.J. My mom worked in a factory and got her GED. Her dream was to be a teacher, but instead she married my dad when she was 21 and had three girls too quickly. I knew even at four years old

how frustrated she was staying home with us and running the deli out of our duplex where we lived with her non Englishspeaking parents. She was so smart and had wanted a college education more than anything. So, she took night classes before I was even five years old, but never graduated. That was as far as she would get, but she still was so proud of her As. She would read me her essays on Tess of the D’Urbervilles and I ached with pride at her perfect grammar and well-placed participles. Sylva was beautiful but could be so sad at times. I know now she suffered from depression, but back then we would just leave her alone occasionally for hours in her room after dinner while my dad helped with homework. I didn’t know why she cried. I just know I wanted her to be a teacher so she could be happier. And she just wanted us to grow up and be smart and go to the best universities.

She shooed me away after dinner and said not to clean the dishes. Why waste my time when I could be studying?” You will be so important and make a difference.” I believed her. I graduated second in my class and went to Georgetown. She was delighted in her understated way. “Of course, you will go to the best school. You are my daughter. “ I sent her my essays for her editorial comments throughout my four years as an English major there. After I left for college, my mom became a teller at the local savings and loan, and within a decade she became a corporate officer there. All the clientele loved her. Naturally. Everything about her to her customers was so poised and delightful. She was in her element dealing with the rich of our hometown and making them feel so spoiled with her attention. And that accent! And her gorgeous skin! Oh

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first person how they went on about my mom. I knew my mom was marvelous from the get-go. I just was bewitched by her skill set. She could unobtrusively insert herself in high level decisions and not be seen. She would get her agenda approved, but resisted the need for attention. As a result and ironically, she raised three loud and unafraid daughters. She was with the bank the rest of her career and ended up taking a place on the Board of Directors. On her 75th birthday I took her to Rome. Just the two of us. We would celebrate her birthday and hang out in a city she never really got to enjoy. She is from the city of Fiume, now Rijeka after the war. But we would conquer Rome together for a week, walking, shop, talking. What a delight to have my mom all to myself for the first time in my life! It was no surprise that once again shop keepers, bar tenders, and pedestrians were spellbound by her wherever we walked…I would wait to watch as she started magical conversations in her native tongue and could still flirt with a man her junior with her bewitching charm. I will never forget Rome. I will never forget her head tossed back as we toasted her 75th birthday at an amazing café in the Ghetto di Roma and she giggled as she confessed, she was actually 74 not 75, but still wanted this gift. Once again, she stuns me on this evening in June with the light framing her skin! Her eyes! Today I drive back from my visit to the nursing home she lives in now that my dad is gone. It is a memory center. I try to see her every four weeks or so, but the drive is terrible and the stay is just so hard. My sister bears the brunt of the everyday visits as she lives down the street. I have to play One Republic in the car because there is a song with lots of violins and that is what I need to cry. I can’t coax tears these days. I can only dry heave in the car. I feel empty now that my mom has no memories in her head. I guess I wonder if

she is just a pretty wrapped package that has nothing inside that corresponds to any of us. Does that mean she cannot be my mom anymore? I think I have lost her but I hold on. This last visit, she sits in a patchwork of clothes, she would never have worn in the past, with her false teeth once again lost or thrown out, as I collect little pieces of torn photos at her feet. She takes the photos of her grandchildren from the frames and tears them up. When I ask her why she does this, she looks at me and says, in her native tongue, “I don’t know those people.” So the only photos left in her well-appointed room are of her parents, my dad, and the three of us, her daughters. She asks if I regret never having married or having children. I remind her I have both a husband and girls who love her so very much. In fact, her granddaughter was just to visit her last weekend from NYC. But she scolds me quietly as if to say, don’t humor me, dear. So I choose not to. She wants to hear of my home in Florence and my life there. I don’t have one unfortunately. But I speak with great love of Florence and of friends I have never met just to pass the time. We have all stopped reminding her that her parents are dead and her husband isn’t upstairs. There is no upstairs. I want to believe all these dead folks are here when I leave after my visit and they drink espresso with her in her chair by the window overlooking whatever town she happens to be in that day. I want to believe when she talks to her friend Sergio, who passed in the 1980s, he answers her. Apparently, he is still quite reckless with his money. As I say goodbye again to the woman who like vapor is hard to hold onto, she holds my hand softly and shakes her head. “Oh Lisa, please be careful on your drive back to college. And study so hard.” I promise I will. I get in the car. I drive on empty. I put on the violin CD. But I don’t cry yet.

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Beth El. In addition to the collection of food during the High Holidays, JFS also distributed 140 grocery store gift cards for families to purchase perishable items, as well as 100 bags of challah, apples, and honey to Jewish Home Health clients and nursing home and senior apartment residents. “This is truly a community effort, for which we are very grateful,” says Kelly Burroughs, JFS CEO. “As with all our social services programs, we rely on the support of our community, our volunteers, and generous donors to make sure that vulnerable people and families in need have most basic of human need— food to stave off hunger—which is often taken for granted by most of us.” In addition to the food pantries, JFS serves thousands of kosher meals each year to isolated people throughout Hampton Roads, which are delivered by JFS’ Meals on Wheels Volunteers.

Ohef Sholom Temple’s Consecration Class gets goofy

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eptember is Hunger Action Month, so Jewish Family Service launched a food drive with the goal to collect 500 non-perishable food items by the end of the month. Started by JFS’ Appreciation, Recreation and Moral Committee, JFS staff, volunteers, and board of directors mobilized to exceed the target goal, collecting more than 650 non-perishable food items. Additional support came from the collection box at the entrance of the Sandler Family Campus. “We were in dire need of help to restock our shelves,” says Jody Laibstain, who coordinates JFS’ food pantry distribution. “For whatever reason,” she says, “even the Foodbank is low on food.” Large contributions of food also came from four area synagogues who held food drives during the High Holidays: Kehillat Bet Hamidrash, Temple Israel, Ohef Sholom Temple, and Congregation

A

fter the formal photographs were taken, Ohef Sholom Temple’s Religious School’s newest students had a good time getting goofy with Rabbi Roz Mandleberg and Cantor Jen Rueben on Sunday, October 20. Surrounded by an unscrolled Torah, parents, Religious School students and friends, the new students received mini-Torahs and certificates of Consecration. A picnic-style lunch followed for all. Mazel Tov!


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jewishnewsva.org | October 28, 2019 | Jewish News | 13


it’s a Wrap Voicing vision—Ambassador kicks off Community Campaign: 2020 Vision Lisa Richmon

A

packed house people gathered at the Reba and Sam Sandler Family Campus on Thursday, September 26, in anticipation of a powerful IGNITE! 2020 Campaign kickoff with featured speaker Ambassador Alfred Moses. During a fast-paced one-hour program, the audience viewed two videos—one about the Campaign and another about the Simon Family JCC’s Arts + Ideas program; heard from four community members representing people and programs supported by the Campaign; from Amy Levy, UJFT president and Betty Ann Levin, UJFT executive vice president/ CEO; and from Ambassador Moses. Before introducing Ambassador Moses, campaign chair Jodi Klebanoff thanked everyone for making the event a priority and spoke about the power of community. Playing to a full house, a conversation between Art Sandler and Ambassador Moses delighted the audience as the event centerpiece. Moses is the author of Bucharest Diaries: From Darkness to Light. While in Romania, Moses encountered Jews in need who asked three questions, thus changing the arc of his life: • ‘Are you American?’ • ‘Are you Jewish?’ • ‘We’re blamed for everything. Will you help us?’ Moses said yes to all three questions and kept his promise by devoting 18 years helping thousands of Jews get out of Romania. Then. again as Ambassador,

Art Sandler and Ambassador Alfred Moses.

getting Romania into NATO. “Ignite: 2020 was more than the kickoff to our community’s 2020 Campaign,” says Amy Levy, UJFT president. “It was about coming together and celebrating the impact our community dollars are having within our community and Jewish communities throughout the world. While we only heard stories from four of our recipients, these stories illustrated the power of the Annual Campaign in impacting lives.” “Ignite: 2020 is the perfect description for our UJFT Campaign,” says Karen Lombart. “It started with the presence of a visionary, Ambassador Alfred Moses. At 90 years old, he is still a giant, as we learned from his informal conversation with Art Sandler.

“Remembered for his unrelenting determination and skills to obtain visas for trapped Jews in communistic Romania, he helped them make Aliyah to Israel in the 1970s. In the 1990s, as the country’s U.S. Ambassador, he again proved to be insightful in his guidance in taking Romania from “its dark ages” into NATO,” says Lombart. “Still writing, traveling and speaking, our community experienced a distinguished global figure who changed history while always being authentic to his personal identity.” says Lombart. Mark Sisisky, JDC vice president, and his wife, Susan, drove from Richmond to hear Ambassador Moses. “Ambassador Moses’ story was specific to him, but

points in his story were universal, with some nice shout outs to JDC, he says. You guys have a wonderful JDC community and I look forward to coming again. Because of Laura Miller, and Annie and Art, your community knows more about JDC than most.” “It was a privilege to hear firsthand Ambassador Moses’ story,” says Bern Glasser. “A veteran attorney, statesman, and passionate advocate of the Romanian Jewish population attempting to flee dark times. The Times of Israel deemed him a modern-day Moses. I was most impressed by his passion for protecting people and the rule of law.” “I hope that the 2020 Campaign will kindle a desire in every member of our Jewish community to PARTICIPATE… and by that, I mean not only make a gift to the Campaign, but also to get involved within our Jewish community, whether through their synagogue, one of our many Jewish day schools, the Simon Jewish Community Center, BBYO, or another opportunity. Together, we will strengthen our community—Jewish Tidewater,” says Levy.

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14 | Jewish News | October 28, 2019 | jewishnewsva.org

Jillian Reynolds Sachs, Jennifer Groves, Alfred Moses, Matt Kantro, and Danny Rubin.

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! v o T l e z a M Supplement to Jewish News October 28, 2019 jewishnewsva.org | October 28, 2019 | Mazel Tov | Jewish News | 15


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C E L E B R AT E YO U R

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Priceless work

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tacy Apelt, jeweler at Either Ore Jewelers at Strawbridge—is well known to many of the local Jewish community. Many years ago, Apelt took over Sydney Ash’s business in the old Golden Triangle Hotel. Apelt has done repair work for other jewelry businesses on tasks their jewelers couldn’t do. He has worked for ambassadors, Super Bowl winners, John Denver, The Harlem Globetrotters, and made the gift for Queen Elizabeth II on her visit to Jamestown on its 400 anniversaries on 2007. He is often asked to do complicated tasks repairing antiques made in the ways of days past and by the type of craftsmen that don’t exist today. In 2013, he was asked to restore all of the alter pieces for Temple Israel. Some of these silver pieces were 100 years old. They were almost all handmade by old school silversmiths. There were breastplates, torah crowns, rimonim, yads, and menorot. These exquisite pieces were far above the class of most modern Judaica. The Torah Crowns and Rimonim were the most complex repairs. Made with hundreds of pieces, many of which were missing, they were assembled with handmade nuts and bolts. It’s not possible to go to ‘Rimonims-R-Us’ and get spare parts for these items. Besides re-creating these missing pieces, the work had to be done with kosher supplies—yes, there is such a thing as kosher metal polish and other polishing and cleaning supplies! Kosher baking soda, kosher rouge, and lots of kosher elbow grease (supplied by kosher elbows) are required. All work started with a prayer of “b’ezrat Hashem.” To begin the project, dozens of close up photos were taken so re-assembly could be done correctly. Then, the task of disassembling the rimonim one piece at a

time began, laying them out in a circle on the living room carpet. The largest torah case crown had 170 pieces. Everything was photographed again for positioning, the broken parts were repaired, new parts made to match, replacement bells ordered and created, and many missing sterling silver nuts and bolts made one at a time. The creatures that surround the crown look like dragons, but are actually called fantastic beats, or fantastic creatures. You might consider them to be the guard dogs for the seraphim. The breastplates were severely dented, missing parts, and very tarnished and dirty. These were taken apart and new doors made for the mezuzah on the breastplates. The new doors were hand engraved with the proper characters and artwork. The dent repair work was done with hammers of varying hardness, ending with a felt hammer for the final smoothing blows. In reassembly, the photos were very important. All this work was done on a time schedule to have everything finished in time for Rosh Hashanah. The pieces were rededicated for the congregation to start the new year. Cost was never discussed, and when asked what the bill was, Apelt said, “It was a lot of work, I have to charge you a whole shekel.” One of the congregation leaders laughed, and said, “OK, now, let’s be serious.” Apelt replied, “I am always serious when it comes to money.” The rabbi later paid Apelt with one very old silver shekel. Why do all this work for a shekel… because it is a mitzvah, and performing a mitzvah is its own reward. Apelt can be found behind his workbench in Either Ore Jewelwrs at Strawbridge Marketplace, still doing repairs on family heirlooms, making new jewelry, and occasionally repairing really unusual pieces.

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Mazel Tov

Carol Roth and Allan Brum at the renewal of their wedding vows.

Love, uninterrupted: Carol Roth and Allan Brum Lisa Richmon

A

s high school students in the late 60s, Carol Roth and Allan Brum went from good friends to dating. Things really heated up in college and Carol was sure that Allan was ‘the one.’ Unfortunately, Carol’s parents weren’t feeling it, and their unease with the relationship led to an almost-forever split. “They made it very difficult for us to see each other,” says Allan. “The family issues just wore us down and we broke up.” “We both married other people and had families,” says Carol, “But, I never stopped thinking about him.” The internet intervened 27 years later, in 2002, when Carol received an e-mail from Classmates.com: ‘Hey Carol, have you reached out to any of your friends from Oceanside?’ “I looked for Allan’s name,” says Carol. “Lo and behold, there it was.” Prior to filling out the contact form, Carol had already planned to separate from her husband with whom she had one daughter, Jessica. Carol was also a loving stepmother to Melissa, her husband’s daughter from a previous marriage. “Despite these powerful connections,” says Carol, “I knew something had to change.”

Allan immediately responded to the email with a request for her number and called three days later. During that call Carol broke down and shared what was in her heart. When she finally got around to asking about him, she learned that he had recently separated from his wife. Calling from a hotel where he was working as a television sports producer, he told her he had just left an apartment ‘full of boxes’ in Los Angeles. “I was the love of his life, as he was mine,” says Carol. But concerns about how their respective daughters would handle things was one reason they both moved cautiously. They started with a long-distance phone relationship. “He was finishing my sentences by the third conversation. After all that time, he was able to jump into my brain and surprise me with how quickly he knew what I was thinking.” When the time came to take the leap, and see each other in person, the spark was immediate. “We felt the connection right away,” Carol says. When Carol was recovering from surgery in the summer of ‘02, Allan flew to New Jersey to visit. He saw her 10-yearold gold Acura Legend in the driveway and told her, “I just left the same exact car in Los Angeles.” Of the many new discoveries made, driving the same Acura


Mazel Tov Legend was the least expected. Carol and Allan celebrated 10 years of marriage on September 10, 2019 and renewed their vows surrounded by family and friends, standing under the chuppah at Ohef Sholom Temple. The wedding ceremony began with Cantor Jen Reuben singing, Etta James’ At Last. Today, the couple does everything toget her— cook, walk the dog, and travel. They had their first fight on a flight coming home from Athens in 2004. “I was absolutely devastated. I just looked at him, crying, and said, ‘You’re the love of my life, I don’t want to fight with you.’ Allan laughed. His response was, “did you think we were never going to have a fight?” “We may argue, but after so many years without contact, we don’t want to spend time being angry, so we make up easily. When I lament over the time we spent apart, Allan comforts me with his perspective on the matter,” says Carol. ‘G-d and fate intervened with those plans. Now is the time we’re meant to spend together.’” Carol’s daughter Jessica moved to Virginia Beach with her husband Matt, one reason why Carol and Alan decided to make Virginia their new home. Carol and Allan don’t have children together, but they do share a family and a home, which they recently built in Norfolk’s East Beach section. Jessica calls Allan her ‘bonus’ dad. Her children and her friends’ kids cherish their time with him. Carol grew close to Allan’s daughter Jenny when she moved to Los Angeles in

2006. Allan has relatives in France who escaped Poland and survived the Holocaust. The “second chancers” as they call themselves, enjoy traveling; their favorite destinations so far include Australia, Hawaii, Venice, Paris, and Aixen Provence, France. France has a special place in their hearts, which is why they chose to celebrate Jenny’s 16th birthday with family and friends in Paris.

We could both

A parental blessing of their relationship may have been an issue in 1972, but it’s not one now. “I gave birth to one child, but have three daughters,” says Carol referring to her deep bonds with Jenny, Melissa, and Jessica. “Jenny talks to Carol about things she’s not as comfortable telling her father,” says Allan. “If I’m not privy to something, I ask Carol. Carol is by far the person with the biggest heart of anyone I’ve met. She’s also the most honest.” “Even at 50, I wanted my mother’s approval,” says Carol. “When my sister told our mother that Allan and I were back together she cried and said ‘we thought we were doing the right thing.’ Before my father died from complications from Parkinson’s in 2004, the four of us had dinner together in Florida. We could both tell how pleased they were about our reunion, and that I was happy.” Allan says, “we finally had a chance to make up.” Carol adds, “We both now take comfort that all four parents are watching, with approval, from above.”

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Mazel Tov

The other patient, birthday twins and Double Chai Lisa Richmon

O

n June 25, Carly Glikman went to Sentara Leigh Hospital for a scheduled C-Section to deliver her second child. Glikman is United Jewish Federation of Tidewater’s outreach manager. When the nurse started to prep Glikman for the procedure, she was told to stop and was pulled away. “I was told, ‘another patient is progressing quicker than we expected. We will have to deliver her son first and you’ll have to wait,’” says Glikman. Due to the ‘other patient’s quick delivery, Glikman’s daughter was delivered about an hour later. That night, Glikman saw a friend’s new baby post on Facebook. “I saw that Allena had her son 36 minutes before me,” says Glikman. Glikman and Allena Anglen became friends after meeting at a Young Adult Division Happy Hour. Anglen teaches elementary school students at Norfolk Public Schools. She created the Toddlin’ Around Tidewater blog.

“I texted Allena from my hospital bed, ‘where are you?” Glikman says. “Which doctor delivered your baby?” After texts back and forth, Glikman and Anglen discovered they did in fact have the same doctor, and their babies were born 36 minutes apart. Anglen recalls hearing the staff talk about a C-section being pushed back because her labor was so fast. Now they both knew. Their friend was the ‘other’ patient. “My labor was in the blink of an eye,” says Anglen, “I heard the doctors talking about the other patient who would have to wait. I had no idea it was Carly. When you think of all that happened so quickly, it’s amazing what they can do in 36 minutes.” “Chai is life. 36 is Double Chai,” says Glikman. “This isn’t a big city. It’s pretty amazing to me that we are friends, both Jewish, in the same hospital and had our babies 36 minutes apart. What a great story to tell at their wedding!”

Carly Glikman and Allena Anglen with their newborns.

Shalom Baby: Moms bond with babies and heritage B

ond is exactly what Alicia PahlCornelius did when she started listening to the CD of Jewish songs that came in her personally delivered Shalom Baby basket. Pahl-Cornelius says she loved her basket so much, she referred a friend who was days away from giving birth because she wanted her friend to have a special Shalom Baby experience of her own. Shalom Baby is a complimentary care package filled with mom and baby gifts, and information on Jewish Tidewater that serves as an invitation for community engagement. The program is designed for first-time moms, those with multiple children, and birth and adoptive mothers. Delivery is scheduled three to six weeks after birth. Shalom Baby is a partner program with Strelitz International Academy and PJ Library.

20 | Jewish News | Mazel Tov | October 28, 2019 | jewishnewsva.org

Alicia Pahl-Cornelius and Roma, born June 15, 2019.

Register for a special delivery by contacting Carly Glikman, United Jewish Federation of Tidewater outreach manager, at 757-965-6127 or cglikman@ujft.org.


Mazel Tov Congregation Beth Chaverim and Tidewater Chavurah held Joint High Holiday Services

Betsy Blank

W

onderful, warm, and meaningful High Holiday services were held with Tidewater Chavurah and Congregation Beth Chaverim in the Parrish Hall at Old Donation Episcopal Church in Virginia Beach. Combing the best of both Reform congregations resulted in inspiring services to welcome 5780. Holding the services together was a large commitment for both congregations and took place due to the efforts of the congregations’ presidents, Bill Feldman of Tidewater Chavurah and Chad Bornstein of Congregation Beth Chaverim, as well as many others. Rabbi Ellen Jaffe-Gill and Jim Hibberd, soloist and guitarist, and the joint choir planned and led the services. Many congregants and leaders sang, chanted, and “schlepped” the necessary items to transform a multipurpose room into a sacred worship space. A pot luck luncheon organized by Tidewater Chavurah and with contributions of both congregations followed Rosh Hashanah services. At the conclusion of Yom Kippur, a Break-the-Fast prepared by Congregation Beth Chaverim, was an awesome conclusion to the “Days of Awe.”

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jewishnewsva.org | October 28, 2019 | Mazel Tov | Jewish News | 21


Mazel Tov

Saluting Israel’s heroes: the Benson family G lenn Benson of Bethesda, Maryland, grew up in an ardently Zionist home, the son of South African immigrants who cared deeply for Israel. In high school he attended Jewish day school, participated in a B’nai B’rith Youth Organization summer trip to Israel, visited close relatives who’d emigrated from South Africa to Israel, and, as an adult working as a mortgage lender, supported his local Jewish Federation. About eight years ago, Benson, 39, discovered a new passion—an exciting, different way he could devote himself to helping Israel. Benson was attending a charity golf event with Bobby Cohen of Potomac, Maryland. Cohen, today the National President of Friends of the Israel Defense Forces (FIDF), a not-for-profit started by Holocaust survivors in 1981 to provide educational, cultural, recreational, and

social programs for the men and women of the IDF, mentioned that FIDF’s MidAtlantic Region was launching a new chapter in Washington D.C. “Something just clicked for me. It connected right away,” Benson says. For Benson, FIDF represented a way he could directly support the very people who were defending the Jewish homeland. “This idea, that if you can help people who are fighting for Israel’s security and freedom—I viewed it as not just Israel’s freedom, but Jews’ freedom everywhere,” he says. In fact, Benson felt so strongly that he began talking about FIDF with friends, and in 2017 they decided the best way to spread the word was by sharing the story of FIDF over latkes and vodka with their contemporaries. The initial idea was not to just hold a one-off fundraiser, Benson adds, but to

generate “brand awareness” among perhaps 30 peers. He figured if he and his friends somehow gathered 100 others “it would be a big win.” Instead, some 200 attended, and afterward many told him they were so excited they thought he should seek contributions for FIDF. Last year, Benson and his friends organized an event and attracted more than 30 families to join one of FIDF’s signature programs, the Adopt-a-Unit initiative, in which people directly support the humanitarian needs of the soldiers of a specific IDF brigade or battalion. Those types of FIDF programs, which tie supporters to the men and women of the IDF, “make the connection extremely tangible,” Benson says. For Benson’s father, Nathan, 66, of Virginia Beach, that’s also one of FIDF’s big differentiators. FIDF allows supporters to help the IDF’s men and women directly through educational programs like post-army IMPACT! Scholarships for combat veterans; Fallen and Wounded Programs such as STRIDES, which provides athletic prosthetics, and LEGACY for the widows, children, siblings, and other family members of fallen soldiers; and assistance for Lone Soldiers—those who join the IDF without having an immediate family in Israel. “You can pick where you think you can have an impact, so FIDF’s different than a lot of other organizations,” Nathan Benson says. “It could be an IMPACT! student or it could be taking care of a Lone Soldier. FIDF is something through which you can have a direct impact and you can see the benefit.” When FIDF decided to launch a Virginia Chapter as well, Nathan Benson

did not hesitate to follow in his son’s footsteps. It was FIDF’s overall credo about the men and women of the IDF—“their job is to look after Israel. Our job is to look after them” —that deeply resonated with Nathan Benson. “Without a strong IDF, Jews around the world won’t be as strong,” Nathan Benson says. For both men, FIDF is inextricably linked to their Zionist ideals of supporting Israel, a link that connects and unites every Jew, and spans cultural, political, or religious lines. “Israel ties us together. If there’s no Israel, what does that mean for Jews around the world?” Nathan Benson asks. Benson is co-chair of the FIDF Next Group in Washington D.C. Nathan Benson and his wife, Ilana, are chairing the Second Annual Virginia Gala that will take place on December 5, at the Hilton Norfolk, the Main. The gala begins at 5:30 pm with a VIP reception, followed by a dinner reception and cocktails at 6:15 pm. The funds raised at this event will go toward FIDF well-being and educational programs for IDF soldiers.

Without a

strong IDF,

Jews around

S I M O N FA M I LY PA S S P O R T T O I S R A E L

Are you a Jewish teen who wants to go to Israel?

Apply at foundation.jewishva.org from October 1 – November 15. Tidewater Jewish Foundation can help fund the trip through the Simon Family Passport to Israel Fund! - Grants are available for students age 13 to 18, traveling to Israel on an organized and staffed peer trip. - Trips will be funded up to 50% of the eligible expenses.

For more information, contact Ann Swindell aswindell@ujft.org | (757) 965-6106

22 | Jewish News | Mazel Tov | October 28, 2019 | jewishnewsva.org

the world won’t be

as strong.

For more information or to support FIDF, visit https://www.fidf.org/events/second-annual-virginia-gala, or contact Alex Pomerantz, FIDF director of Virginia, at Alex.Pomerantz@fidf.org, 757-472-9054.


Mazel Tov JFS welcomes three new board of directors

J

ewish Family Service of Tidewater recently gained three new board members. Mazel Tov to the new directors and to JFS for adding these women to the board, as each brings different expertise.

Rebecca Tall Fun fact—I have triplets (19-yearsold, two boys and a girl). And, I lived in Japan. Why?—I feel that Rebecca Tall JFS serves such an important purpose in our community and has helped so many people through all of its amazing programs. I feel that my time and energy can be put to good use on the JFS board. In addition, it closely aligns with my job at the Sentara Center for Healthcare Ethics and what we do there.

Florida, Israel, and New York. I have a degree in opera and sang professionally for 10 years before becoming a cantor. I am an extremely messy Cantor Jennifer cook, but I love to Rueben do it. Why?—I joined the JFS board because this organization embodies the “why” of Jewish practice and engagement. We study and we pray to teach us to welcome the stranger, to care for the needy, and to comfort the sick, which is what JFS is all about. I look forward to finding ways to strengthen the partnership between JFS and our area synagogues.

Now Open for Lunch* 11:00–2:00 | 7 Days a Week

*Little Neck Location Only 3333 Virginia Beach Blvd Virginia Beach 23452

757-412-0203 • www.ilgiardino.com

Jody Greason Fun fact—I recently completed a master’s program in clinical nutrition, and am beginning a second career as an integrative nutritionist. Also, I am an identical twin.

Jody Greason

Why?—My why is simply I was asked. I accepted because I have always admired the work and mission of JFS, and have always wanted to help, but not really known how, in a meaningful way. Being Jewish, to me, is all about family, so this organization that helps families, as well as individuals without families, seemed like a natural fit.

Cantor Jennifer Rueben Fun fact—I am the cantor at Ohef Sholom Temple. I’m originally from Virginia and I am so happy to be back home, by way of Maine, Minnesota, Massachusetts,

Celebrate Ohef Sholom Temple’s 175th Anniversary Saturday, November 16, 2019, 6:30 pm 530 Raleigh Avenue, Norfolk, Virginia Dinner Dancing to J & the Band

Open Bar Piano Bar

Come as a Famous or Favorite Jewish Person or Dressy! $75 per person or $1,000 per reserved table of 10 RSVP online at ohefsholom.org or call 757-625-4295 by November 4

jewishnewsva.org | October 28, 2019 | Mazel Tov | Jewish News | 23


Mazel Tov

Your kid’s first bar/bat mitzvah invite: Everything you need to know Jennifer Modlinger

I

t happens around sixth grade—your child receives his or her first invitation to a bar or bat mitzvah. It arrives in your email inbox or by regular mail, and you immediately think, “How is [insert child’s name here] old enough to be attending bar and bat mitzvahs?” This thought is immediately followed by, “How am I old enough to have a kid old enough to attend bar and bat mitzvahs?” Next comes the question, “What on earth should he/she wear?” And, finally, some version of, “Crap, how do I prepare him or her for this experience?” Take a deep breath, grab a glass of…

whatever (we don’t judge!) and settle in. We’ll get you through this. Here’s everything you need to know.

Before you go Ask your child if he or she is friends with the child celebrating this milestone. Your child does not have to attend every bar or bat mitzvah to which he or she is invited. Much like those birthday party invitations that “disappeared” before your child ever knew they existed, attendance is not required. But since your kid is no longer five, be sure he or she wants to attend this event. (Note: There is some nuance here. Every kid deserves to be supported by friends and classmates during this momentous milestone. However, you also don’t want to force your

child to attend an event where he or she will be miserable.)

RSVP For the love of God, RSVP. As soon as you can. The family needs a headcount for planning purposes. Don’t make them chase you down. I say this out of guilt from being on both sides—the person who has RSVP’d late and the host who’s had to chase down guests. Put it on your family calendar. And notify the hosts if plans change. We all double book and flake sometimes, and unfortunately timed stomach bugs happen. But it sucks when guests RSVP and don’t attend, and then…crickets. The people who did that at my son’s bar mitzvah are dead to me. Dead, I tell you.

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The clothes Depending on your kid, this may or may not be a struggle. If your kid loves dressing up in twirly dresses or likes to look dapper in a suit and tie, congratulations! My boys equated ties and belts with suffocation, torture and death, so, alas, our path was not an easy one. While attire varies by synagogue and sometimes even by region, a good rule of thumb is to dress somewhat conservatively. For girls, this means a dress that is long enough not to shock your grandma and covers the shoulders. She doesn’t have to dress like a nun, but this isn’t the occasion to wear that backless bandage dress that she received as a hand-me-down. Sleeveless dresses and pants are acceptable in some synagogues, but I always find it better to err on the side of coverage on these occasions. Cardigans are always helpful here. Clothing for boys generally means, at the very least, some sort of button-down shirt tucked into khakis or dress pants. Depending on your kid and the occasion you can add a tie, a blazer or even spring for a full-on suit. However, this does not need to bankrupt you! While jeans are a no-no, you can get perfectly respectable outfits at places like Target and Walmart—and this isn’t a bad idea since your kid is going to outgrow whatever you buy before you blink. A word about shoes. Leave basketball sneakers and track shoes at home. Cute slip-on sneakers can be OK, especially if your child doesn’t have any other occasion to wear dress shoes. And make sure your kid can walk in the shoes. If I had a nickel for every girl I’ve seen tottering around in platforms, I would be able to buy myself a fancy, overpriced latte—or 10! My final word of advice here: When in doubt, ask another parent. This is what group texts are made for. How to behave in synagogue If you’ve never been to synagogue, you may want to read up a bit, just so you are familiar enough to coach your child. In


Mazel Tov very broad strokes, here is what you need to know.

Arrive on time(ish) Check the invitation for the time services begin. Depending on the branch of Judaism, you can add 30 to 45 minutes or so—services can be long and kids get squirmy, but you also don’t want to miss the parts led by the bar or bat mitzvah child. Cover your head Synagogue policies vary, but generally speaking, Jewish males cover their heads with kippahs and many women do as well. Most of the time, there will be special kippah provided by the hosts for the occasion—which is helpful if you don’t have one on hand, but you can also absolutely BYO. Explain to your child that wearing this is a sign of respect and that stuffing it in their pocket is the opposite of that. The same goes for playing frisbee with it (depending on the shape of the kippah, they can catch air quite nicely). Devices Regardless of the level of observance of the family, phones and other handheld devices don’t belong in a synagogue service. You may want to suggest that your child leave his or her device at home. If this is not an option, stress that it should not be used in the synagogue. At all, unless someone needs to dial 911 and your child is the only person on the premises with a phone—unlikely. There should be no texting, playing games, surfing the web, emailing, answering phone calls or taking pictures. Oh, and turn off the ringer—or maybe even the entire phone. Be present Synagogue services can drag on, even for the most devout and seasoned attendees. But your child is there to support his or her friend, and should, therefore, be present in the service. Bathroom breaks are acceptable, if kept to a minimum (like one), and you should return promptly. Any sort of en masse exodus is frowned upon—it is distracting and very noticeable.

Shhhh… Everyone is guilty of talking in synagogue. Everyone. But when you have a pew full of kids, the whispers, comments, giggles and greetings can all add up to a cacophony. Explain to your child that talking should be kept to a minimum. Actually, tell them that there is no talking allowed. They’re going to talk anyway. But it is good to set expectations. The Party What to wear Bar/bat mitzvah parties come in all shapes and sizes these days, from casual, kids-only parties at sports complexes to swanky cocktail-attire shindigs in nightclubs. The invitation will usually give you some sense of the expected attire. Shorts, a T-shirt and sneakers are fine for an event held at a Ninja gym or trampoline park. Otherwise, some dressing up is required. Attire for boys is similar to synagogue, and girls can wear something dressier and worry less about skin coverage.

and he didn’t know any of the grownups there and therefore didn’t ask for help. He called us, but there was not much I could do initially because he was 45 minutes away. This is even more important if your child has a life-threatening food allergy or other medical condition.

And some general etiquette Gifts If your child is the only one attending, a modest gift is all that is required. Perhaps a bit more if the guest of honor is a very good friend. There is no need to go beyond your means. Practices surrounding gifts vary widely in different communities, so this is another excellent occasion to call upon your mom squad for advice. Congratulating and thanking These are both important. Instruct your child to congratulate the bar/bat mitzvah and tell him or her they did a great job.

(You ALWAYS say they did a great job, whether they have the voice of an angel or are completely tone deaf!) Before leaving, instruct your child to go up to the parents of the bar/bat mitzvah, wish them a mazel tov and say thank you. It is the menschy thing to do. Even if your son or daughter is painfully shy, thanking your hosts is always appropriate. It is also a good time to practice these interactions—you are supposed to be awkward at this age—better now than at your first company holiday party. Attending bar or bat mitzvahs is often the first step in the whirlwind socializing that comes with adolescence. Before you blink there will be quinceaneras, Sweet Sixteens and requests for the car keys. Take lots of pictures, buckle in and enjoy the ride! This article originally appeared on Kveller.

Some pro tips Most of the same rules from synagogue apply for the party. While phone usage is not strictly verboten, it isn’t cool to spend the entire party playing Minecraft. A few additional words of advice regarding parties: Make sure your kid has a snack first—sixth- and seventh-graders don’t always have the most mature palates and may balk at the more sophisticated fare. The last thing you need at the end of the evening is an overtired AND hungry kid. You should also not feel compelled to adhere to the pickup time suggested by the party hosts. If a party goes until 11 p.m. or midnight and you know that your kid will be a disaster the following morning, it is OK to pick up a bit early. You won’t be the only one. No matter how mean your kid says you are. In case of emergency One additional word to the wise, and I learned this lesson the hard way: Discuss what your child will do if he or she needs help during the party. Many times the adults present will not know all the children in attendance. My son fell and sprained his ankle at a bat mitzvah party, jewishnewsva.org | October 28, 2019 | Mazel Tov | Jewish News | 25


26 | Jewish News | Mazel Tov | October 28, 2019 | jewishnewsva.org


Lisa Richmon

O

n Monday before Election Day, the Hampton Roads community is invited for a FREE triple shot of Vitamin A when activist, author, and artist Christopher Noxon stirs up ‘good trouble’ for civically minded and modern-day activists. In a reception-style talk, and first-ever gallery exhibition of his work, Noxon will share the ‘why’ behind his latest book addressing the civil rights movement in an unconventional journaling style. “This is an unusual art form,” says Noxon, author of Good Trouble Lessons from the Civil Rights Playbook. “I’m a journalist, not a trained visual artist. This form is intimate like a journal, but it’s not about me. It’s about lessons learned from the civil rights struggle, filtered through my sensibilities. Nothing about the book is political or me trying to convince anyone to do anything. It’s all about embracing change, inspiring hope and human values. I’m not profiting from these lessons. All proceeds go to Center for Popular Democracy. They do the kind of work that was inspired by the Civil Rights movement.” In preparation for his visit to Hampton Roads, Noxon invested time learning about Virginia’s civil rights history. He spent hours talking to locals such as fellow activists Lois and Barry Einhorn. He learned about Operation Understanding, which was inspired by Lois Einhorn’s meeting with activist Julian Bonds. “This project is sadly defunct,” says Noxon. “But I hope to bring some attention back to it and spark new interest. The St. Paul’s Area Revitalization project is also fascinating to me. It helps to understand where Civil Rights issues are today, and what’s urgent and pressing. Incarceration and housing, not sit-ins and back of the bus.” Though his book is published, Noxon is still learning. “I didn’t know that the first slave ship arrived on your shores, and the history of America started in

Virginia,” says Noxon. “All of this was new to me.” Among other surprises, was the grit and glory of champions like Barbara Johns and Irene Morgan who might have sparked forever heroes like Rosa Parks and Reverend Martin Luther King, Jr. These discoveries resulted in five of the pieces he created for this event. Noxon’s use of vivid watercolors and intimate text illustrate the importance of joy, faith, and confrontation as an antidote to outrage and despair “I just hope the book’s message comes through and leaves people feeling more hopeful,” says Noxon. “All I need, to fix that state of inertia or hopelessness, is to spend a little time talking to someone who is interested in learning about history, to snap them into a different headspace.” After spending much time in Alabama, Noxon says he is honored and excited to visit Virginia. “Creating larger pieces for the exhibit was so much fun,” he says. “I’ve never done anything this big. This event gave me my first chance to paint an oak tree.” (the Emancipation Oak Tree at Hampton University.) “This tree was the classroom for newly freed slaves to gather and learn. The first reading of the Emancipation Proclamation took place here.” Noxon’s painting of Barbara Johns (with Greta Thurnberg, for a modern beat) is also part of the exhibition hanging in the gallery. “One could make a case that without these student strikers, we wouldn’t have Brown V. Board of Education.” In hindsight, Noxon sees that the ‘men’ with the biggest shoulders were often students and female. “King and legendary male ministers were playing catch up with teenagers and church ladies leading the charge.” “Whatever you do can be your avenue of protest,” says Noxon. “It can be marching, cooking, stitching, canvassing, organizing carpools or bagging lunches for the homeless. You have to band together. It’s not a solitary activity. If

you want to make a change meaningfully, you can’t do it just posting memes on social media.” Book signing will follow the reception. All book proceeds go to Center for Popular Democracy. Proceeds from the sale of art go to Simon Family JCC’s Arts + Ideas Department and Center for Popular Democracy. For more information, see page 28.

*of blessed memory

Monday, November 4, 6 pm, Sandler Family Campus

Proud supplier for the Lee & Bernard Jaffe* Family Jewish Book Festival at the Simon Family JCC

Drawing Virginia into his Civil Rights Playbook

109 E. Main Street • Downtown Norfolk • 757-622-9223

Journaling Journalist:

Prince Books

book festival

Historical Fiction Crime Thriller The Royal Gold Crowns of a brutal ancient people reemerge in present day Virginia fulfilling their legend to reunite these people to take over the world by first smuggling heroin to the coast of Virginia Beach and the OBX. Two retired SEAL TEAM 6 members have been working as undercover agents for any law enforcement agency that needs them. They are tasked with finding out who is behind this new menace and take them out.

Abbot Lee Granoff, MD More information from: abbotgranoff.com Contact the author: scythian1@cox.net Available from: website local bookstores Amazon Barnes & Noble

jewishnewsva.org | October 28, 2019 | Jewish News | 27


LEE & BERNARD JAFFE FAMILY

S I M O N F A M I LY J C C

2019–2020

Stirring up Good Trouble. The Science of Snacking. Israeli Innovation. Groundbreaking Genetics and Profit Meets Purpose

T

he annual celebration of Jewish writers, books, and ideas, Simon Family JCC’s Lee & Bernard Jaffe Family Jewish Book Festival provides opportunities to engage with talented authors about their latest books and projects. The Simon Family JCC is a member of the Jewish Book Council, a group that supports more than 120 organizations across North America, including JCC’s, synagogues, Hillels, Jewish Federations, and cultural centers. Books by prominent and emerging authors will be featured in a pop-up bookstore in the Simon Family JCC’s Copeland Cardo. Emmy Award-winning writers, New York Times bestselling authors, visual artists, and popular journalists are all part of the Festival’s 2019–2020 line-up.

Good Trouble

Chutzpah

Hacking Darwin

Lessons from the Civil Rights Playbook Christopher Noxon Monday, November 4, 6 pm

Why Israel is a Hub of Innovation and Entrepreneurship Inbal Arieli Wednesday, November 6, 7:30 pm

Genetic Engineering and the Future of Humanity Jamie Metzl Tuesday, November 12, 7:30 pm

A

A

In conjunction with the Community Relations Council of the United Jewish Federation of Tidewater, including UJFT’s Society of Professionals. Learn more about Israel Today at JewishVA.org/

In partnership with United Jewish Federation of Tidewater’s Society of Professionals.

C

hristopher Noxon’s vivid pen and watercolor drawings provide a moral imagination map for activists and communities seeking inspiration and guidance. Expect some pre-election day thoughts when Noxon speaks about the importance of confrontation, joy, and faith. This event marks Noxon’s first gallery-style exhibition where he will display illustrations from Good Trouble, as well as feature art created expressly to reflect Tidewater’s and Virginia’s Civil Rights history. A journalist, illustrator and civil rights champion, Christopher Noxon’s work appears in the New Yorker, the Atlantic, Salon and the New York Times.

Book proceeds are donated to the Center for Popular Democracy, a nonprofit advocacy group devoted to racial justice, health care, and poverty issues. Proceeds from the sale of art will benefit Simon Family JCC’s Arts + Ideas Department and Center for Popular Democracy.

28 | Jewish News | October 28, 2019 | jewishnewsva.org

former officer in the Israeli defense forces Elite Intelligence Unit 8200, Inbal Arieli is the keeper and teller of secrets about Israel’s rise to dominance. A tiny country with the highest concentration of start-ups per capita worldwide, Israel boasts a significant number of entrepreneurs. Her message to aspiring entrepreneurs is compelling, counter-intuitive, and points to reframing the concept of rule-breaking chutzpah.

leading geopolitical expert and technology futurist, Jamie Metzl shares a groundbreaking exploration of the many ways genetic engineering is shaking the core foundations of our lives–sex, war, love, and death. Open to discussion (and up for debate) is that slippery slope between breathtaking advances in human well-being and the descent into a potentially deadly genetic arms race and Dystopian society.

Israel Today.

The United Jewish Federation of Tidewater and the Simon Family JCC’s Lee and Bernard Jaffe Family Jewish Book Festival is held in coordination with the Jewish Book Council, a national organization whose sole purpose the promotion of Jewish books.


Tidewater Reads! Local Authors Present

Sunday, November 17, 1:00 pm

A Field Guide to the Jewish People

Dave Barry Adam Mansbach Alan Zweibel Wednesday, December 4, 2019, 7:30 pm Susan S. Goode Fine and Performing Arts Center Virginia Wesleyan University 5817 Wesleyan Drive, Virginia Beach $18 admission; $40 admission and book. Special bundle of admission and signed book closes November 27. Limited seating. Advance tickets strongly suggested. JewishVA.org/bookfest

Here All Along Finding Meaning, Spirituality, and a Deeper Connection to Life—In Judaism (After Finally Choosing to Look There) Sarah Hurwitz Sunday, December 8, 10:00 am Temple Emanuel with Congregation Beth Chaverim

M

ichelle Obama’s former speechwriter, Sarah Hurwitz, was born Jewish, but wasn’t sold on Judaism’s place in her life until recently. It took a bad break up to create the opening for exploration that lead to a profound spiritual journey. Stepping outside the synagogue, Hurwitz rediscovers her long-lost connection to Judaism in the place where Jewish law co-exists with everyday questions like how to feed your animals or start a business. Hurwitz encourages us to experience our own rediscovery as she helps us answer the essential question: Why Does Judaism Matter?

Lisa Barr, Outsmart your Pain Alan Bartel, Family, Faith and Love: Beyond Immigration Abbot Grandoff, Crowns of Gold Michael Weissman, Therapy According to God

The Cast: A Novel

Amy Blumenfeld Monday, November 18, 7:30 pm

A

lmost nothing is off limits when an original Saturday Night Live writer, author of New York Times bestseller, Go the F**K to Sleep, and the inspiration for Dave’s World, take one stage. Sarcasm, self-deprecation, paranoia, wisdom, and culture have never clashed so delectably. Alan Zweibel, Adam Mansbach, and Dave Barry will rekindle your love of Jewish culture and fill your cup with new things to worry about.

Presented by the Milton “Mickey” Kramer Scholar-in-Residence Fund’s Tidewater Together series.

Shadow Strike Inside Israel’s Secret Mission to Eliminate Syrian Nuclear Power Yaakov Katz Monday, December 9, 7:30 pm

Presented by the Milton “Mickey” Kramer Scholar-in-Residence Fund’s Tidewater Together series.

A

my Blumenfeld brings to life alternating perspectives of five characters, with an eye on authenticity and the role that the passing of time plays in shaping our friendships and ourselves in The Cast. Blumenfeld is an award-winning writer and national reporter whose work is published in the New York Times, O, the Oprah Magazine, Hadassah and People, among others. She is also a recipient of the James A. Wechsler Award for National Reporting. Register your Book Club for a special meet and greet with author, reserved seats, and more. Contact Patty Shelanski at pshelanski@ujft.org. In partnership with United Jewish Federation of Tidewater’s Women’s Cabinet and Young Adult Division.

LEE & BERNARD JAFFE FAMILY

S I M O N F A M I LY J C C

All events, unless otherwise noted, are free and open to the community with RSVP required, and will take place at the Reba and Sam Sandler Family Campus of the Tidewater Jewish Community. 5000 Corporate Woods Drive Virginia Beach For more information about the Festival, to sponsor, or volunteer contact Patty Shelanski at 757-452-3184 or pshelanski@ujft.org.

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hadow Strike tells, for the first time, the story of the espionage, political courage, military might and psychological warfare behind Israel’s daring operation to stop one of the greatest known acts of nuclear proliferation. Before he took on the role of editor-in-chief of the Jerusalem Post, Yaakov Katz spent two years as a senior policy adviser to Israel’s Minister of Economy and Minister of Diaspora Affairs. In conjunction with the Community Relations Council of the United Jewish Federation of Tidewater, and community partners’ Israel Today series. Learn more about Israel Today at JewishVa.org/IsraelToday.

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UNITED JEWISH FEDERATION OF TIDEWATER & TIDEWATER JEWISH FOUNDATION, ALONG WITH PJ LIBRARY & ONE HAPPY CAMPER FOUNDATION PRESENT

LatkePalooza — Sunday, December 15 Goodnight Bubbala A Joyful Jewish Not-so-Quiet Parody of Goodnight Moon Sheryl Haft 11:30 am

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heryl Haft pours her infectious affection for Yiddish and Jewish culture into her new picture book Goodnight Bubbala. This zesty parody is full of love, kvelling, and of course, noshing. Treat yourself and your kids to this festive mix of music, puppets, storytelling and latkes.

The Face Tells the Secret

Jane Bernstein Monday, December 16, 12:00 pm Beth Sholom Village, 6401 Auburn Dr., Virginia Beach

Gina from Siberia

Jane Bernstein 1:30 pm

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ane Bernstein is an award-winning author and professor at Carnegie Mellon University. She co-wrote Gina from Siberia with her daughter Charlotte Glynn. Based on the true story of Jewish immigrants, determined not to leave their beloved dog behind, Victor becomes a ‘rescue’ dog who finds Gina the terrier, and gives her a new leash on life. Gina from Siberia is a timely story about immigration, acceptance and upheaval, the value of connection, and the process of finding a home in a very different place.

Unlocking Greatness

Charlie Harary Wednesday, January 8, 2020, 7:30 pm

$12 lunch/$21 lunch and book. Bundled registration for lunch and signed book closes December 9.

Gittel’s Journey An Ellis Island Story Lesléa Newman 2:00 pm

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esléa Newman is the author of the groundbreaking story Heather Has Two Mommies. Gittel’s Journey: An Ellis Island Story is based on a pivotal time in her life. Gittel’s Journey is about a small girl, a big ship and a huge country, and a nine-year-old starting life over in a strange place, completely alone.

What to Eat When A Strategic Plan to Improve Your Health & Life Through Food Michael Roizen Thursday, January 16, 2020, 12:00 pm $12 lunch/$31 lunch and book. Bundled registration for lunch and a signed book closes by January 9.

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avigating challenging relationships is at the heart of The Face Tells The Secret. How does compassion for others co-exist with self-love? Love comes at a high price for Roxanne, a single 40-year-old product designer who lives in Pittsburgh and is estranged from her family in Tel Aviv. The cost of a meaningful relationship that has long eluded her means facing her past, and acknowledging ways she’s been shaped by it. Jane Bernstein is also an essayist, a lapsed screenwriter, and a member of the Creative Writing program at Carnegie Mellon University.

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uthor, attorney, and CEO, Charlie Harary presents a unique combination of science, self, emotion, spirituality, and practical tools to manifest greatness. Harary doesn’t believe that MIT grads working in Silicon Valley or entrepreneurs are the only people born to innovate. ‘Everyday innovator’ reflects Harary’s belief that anyone can innovate—they just need a few tools and tips. Harary is a best-selling author and is regarded internationally for his charismatic and forwardthinking lectures, seminars, and keynotes. Presented by the Milton “Mickey” Kramer Scholar-in-Residence Fund’s Tidewater Together series in partnership with the United Jewish Federation of Tidewater’s Society of Professionals.

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ichael Roizen will empower you, A NEW VERSION OF YOU, to make food the best weapon to live better, longer. Whether its eating meals that help you look and feel younger, or snacks that prevent disease, there’s a science governing the wisdom behind these choices. Dr. Michael Roizen is the chief wellness officer at the Cleveland Clinic. He is the co-author of five New York Times bestsellers, including You: The Owners Manual. In partnership with Simon Family JCC’s JFit, United Jewish Federation of Tidewater’s Society of Professionals, and Jewish Family Service of Tidewater.


Witness Lessons from Elie Wiesel’s Classroom Ariel Burger Monday, January 27, 2020 7:30 pm Congregation Beth El

Live! Unorthodox Podcast

The Newish Jewish Encyclopedia

Alana Newshouse, Stephanie Butnick, Liel Leibovitz, Mark Oppenheimer Thursday, March 19, 7:30 pm Zeiders American Dream Theater 4509 Commerce Street, Virginia Beach

Dare to Matter Your Path to Making a Difference Jordan Kassalow Jennifer Krause Thursday, May 14, 2020, 7:30 pm Ohef Sholom Temple

$18 Admission/$50 Admission and both books. Special bundle of admission and both signed books ends March 12. Limited seating. Advance tickets strongly suggested. JewishVa.org/bookfest

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lie Wiesel was a master of thought, words, and deeds in equal measure. His powerful presence inspired lifelong student, rabbi, and artist Ariel Burger to apply those teachings to urgent questions of the day.

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Presented by the Milton “Mickey” Kramer Scholar-in-Residence Fund’s Tidewater Together series in partnership with the United Jewish Federation of Tidewater’s Holocaust Commission, in honor of international Holocaust Remembrance Day.

Renegade Women in Film and TV

Elizabeth Weitzman Thursday, February 6, 2020 12:00 pm Includes free lunch with RSVP.

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oin a live taping of Tablet magazine’s leading international podcast, Unorthodox. Dishing on all-things-Jewish with equal parts profundities, profanities, snarkiness and sincerity, podcaster hosts-turned-authors put their collective stamp on contemporary Judaism in The Newish Jewish Encyclopedia, offering every reader their own starting point of connection with the culture, the tradition, and the religion.

The 100 Most Jewish Foods

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n Renegade Women in Film and TV, Elizabeth Weitzman does more than honor remarkable women in film and television. With charming illustrations and a storytelling twist, she brings icons and overlooked pioneers to life, and shows what it really means to be a renegade in the business. The book features recognizable faces and names such as Amy Poehler, Oprah, Ellen, Shonda Rhimes and Nora Ephron, among others. Expect Weitzman to surprise and enlighten you with truths about a brilliant cast of women who chose to rock their industry with bold moves, both in front of the camera and behind the scenes. Illustrations on exhibit in the Simon family JCC’s Leon Family Gallery throughout January and February, leading up to the 27th annual Virginia Festival of Jewish Film, which begins on February 20, 2020.

A Highly Delectable List Alana Newhouse, Editor-in-Chief Tablet magazine

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he 100 Most Jewish Foods gives context to and celebrates the one thing everyone can relate to in Jewish life: food.

t’s not every day a female rabbi gets a chance to collaborate on a ‘big idea’ book project with her optometrist. VisionSpring Founder and “NY’s Hippest Rabbi” bring their complementary ideas and perspectives to a modern template for living in service to others and making a real difference, without losing sight of personal, family, and financial commitments. In the book’s Forward, Warby Parker, co-CEO and co-founder Neil Blumenthal, refers to Kassalow as his boss, mentor, and friend, and writes about the many ways his work has been inspired by Kassalow. Presented by the Milton “Mickey” Kramer Scholar-in-Residence Fund’s Tidewater Together series in partnership with United Jewish Federation of Tidewater’s Society of Professionals.

Blood, Sweat and my Rock ’n’ Roll Years

Steve Katz Thursday, June 4, 2020, 7:30 pm Simon Family JCC Pool LIVE Concert with music icon, Steve Katz $18 or Free with gift to United Jewish Federation of Tidewater’s 2019-2020 Annual Campaign.

Ever wonder how it feels to be a Jewish rock star?

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JFT’s Year End Event and concert with Music Icon Steve Katz! The founding member of Blood, Sweat and Tears, and music producer who worked with rock renegade Lou Reed, Katz writes openly about being a Jewish ‘rock star’ and the 60s and 70s music scene. jewishnewsva.org | October 28, 2019 | Jewish News | 31


what’s happening Shabbat Project 2019 Friday, November 15—Saturday, November 16

Temple Israel’s unique hour-long Second Saturday programs are excellent and uplifting experiences

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global, grassroots movement that brings Jews from across the world together around the shared heritage of Shabbat, The Shabbat Project was introduced in South Africa in 2013 to astonishing effect. In the days that followed, the Jewish world heard, and was inspired by how the majority of the community kept Shabbat, and how Jews were brought together in unprecedented ways. The concept is simple: Jews from all walks of life, from across the spectrum— religious, secular, and traditional, young and old, from all corners of the world—unite to experience one full Shabbat together. For the past five years, the Tidewater community has joined this global movement. Last year, 200 people came together

Temple Israel’s Second Saturdays engage and entertain

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for a beautiful and inspiring Friday night dinner in the Ghent neighborhood. The Tidewater Shabbat Project hopes to expand and bring together the entire community. To attend this year’s Friday night Shabbat meal, visit https://www.tidewatershabbatproject.com/ and make a reservation.

Security & Beauty

or nearly seven years, synagogue past president and former local TV interviewer Joel Rubin has led a once a month interactive conversation on a Jewish related topic. Often it features a community person well-versed in the subject. “I cannot tell you how rewarding it is to see and hear our members talk, learn, and share,” says Rabbi Michael Panitz. “We all look forward to each Shabbat Sheini.” Come as early as 9:30 am for the traditional service or just at 11 am for Musaf, the Second Saturday program, some final prayers, and of course, TI’s outstanding Shabbat kiddush lunch. Here’s what’s ahead:

Joel Rubin

November 9, 11 am—Wooden Ships on the Water According to the Torah, Noah’s Ark, which is read in Genesis each fall, was 510 feet long, 85 feet wide, 51 feet high with three decks. Of course it was made of wood, a subject retired Marine Corps officer Tom Brandl of Virginia Beach knows well. A 1979 US Naval Academy grad, Brandl started and runs the Tidewater Wooden Boat Workshop in Norfolk, which teaches valuable skills to low-income youth. Meet him and learn about constructing watertight boats, like arks. December 14, 11 am—Ma’oz Tzur It is eight centuries old, but is still sung every night of Hanukkah, which begins the following weekend. Did you know the song has five stanzas, with the first letter of each forming an acrostic of the author’s first name, Mordechai? Did you know it talks about all ancient enemies up until that time from Pharaoh to Haman? Examine the history of this holiday staple, sing all five stanzas, and hear the premier of a new and updated sixth verse, written by Bobbie Fisher. January 11, 2020, 11 am—Prophets Among Us As the New Year begins, everyone would like to know what 2020 holds. Isaiah, Jeremiah, Ezekiel, and others were prophets, and certainly there are many people today who fancy themselves to know what’s coming in politics, culture, technology, and the state of the planet. On this Shabbat Sheini, the conversation will be about the future, and among the guests will be someone who is paid to predict, a local TV weather forecaster. February 8, 2020, 11 am—Let Freedom Ring Fort Monroe has a stirring story about how three fleeing slaves turned that federal post into Freedom’s Fortress. After the morning’s portion about the Children of Israel’s escape across the Sea of Reeds, learn about the horrors of slavery in the U.S. from the National Park Service’s Superintendent at Fort Monroe, Terry Brown, a chronicler of the official beginning and end of slavery, both of which occurred at Old Point Comfort in Hampton.

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March 7, 2020, 11 am—Zachor-Remember Purchase New York Times columnist Bari Weiss’ new book, How to Fight Anti-Semitism and be ready to chat about what is prompting today’s anti-Jewish bias. The conversation will focus on this troubling resurgence on the first, not second, Saturday in March because it is the Shabbat before Purim.


what’s happening A few words from Rishon: Emerging leaders, who are planning this year’s Super Sunday Sunday, November 17, 9:30 am, Sandler Family Campus

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new home.” stepping stone to “I will be greater things. forever grateful The committo this Jewish tee is comprised community and of natives to intend to give Tidewater, such back to the best as Harrell, and of my abilities,” those who came he says. here fleeing perSome, like Tal secution, such as Feldman, came Igor Vaserfirer. from Israel, and “I support 9 : 3 0 A M – 1: 0 0 P M have found a Tidewater’s N O V E M B E R 17, 2 019 home here. Jewish commuO U R V I S I O N I S C L E A R “Knowing nity because the S I G N U P AT J E W I S H V A . O R G / S U P E R S U N D AY that I can contact community supthe Jewish comported me,” he munity made me says. “When my feel very safe and more secure during my family escaped a poverty-stricken counfirst year here when I was still settling try after the fall of the USSR, Jewish down and getting to know the area and Family Service of Tidewater and a slew of getting used to the life here,” she says. other Jewish organizations huddled around It makes her want to give back. us with the guidance and resources that “Super Sunday is important for me allowed us to pull ourselves up by our because I get more exposure to the organibootstraps and, eventually, thrive in our zation that does amazing things around the world for Jews,” she says. It’s important to Hilary and Damian Gordon because the future of the Jewish community is important to them. “I was raised in a rural area with a small Sunday, November 24, 11 am, Ohef Sholom Temple concentration of Jewish people. Now, living in Hampton Roads, we love being a part of he smoke obscured his view briefly, following the flash, then combat units. a vibrant Jewish community and allowing his training kicked in. In addition to the usual medical school curriculum, they study our son the opportunity to experience a Looking across the field, he saw one IDF soldier down. military medicine, including mass casualties, bioterrorism, and totally different Jewish upbringing than I Running quickly, head down, he reached him and made a quick battlefield resuscitation of injured soldiers, learning on site and did,” Hilary says. medical assessment a young soldier, barely moving, moaning, rapid treatment of blood loss and prevention of shock and organ “I feel that this strong community is and large amount of dark red fluid all over his right leg. failure. helping our son establish a strong Jewish Ignoring the staccato of gunfire, he  quickly placed a tourDuring the third year, the very top students are sent abroad, foundation that he will hopefully pass niquet on the upper leg, deftly inserted an IV, life-saving fluid including to the U.S. to obtain additional trauma training expealong when he has a family of his own.” quickly entering this IDF soldier’s vein. rience, as well as experience with American Military Medicine. Damian agrees. Stabilizing his patient, fellow soldiers  quickly moved in to While the students have varied backgrounds, they all share “The community is family and supcarry him toward the helicopter. the same goal: to be a “combat doctor” upon graduation. They porting family is definitely a priority in my Suddenly, a sharp piercing noise, from the Captain’s whistle, know the IDF protects Israel and they help protect and save lives book,” he says. and the exercise was over. of both soldiers and civilians. Harrell has her children’s future in mind, This is Tzameret in action (“Tree top” in Hebrew), the Elite Several of these students will be in Tidewater area to speak at too. Military Medical Program, a collaboration between Hebrew the event at Ohef Sholom Temple. “Volunteering for Super Sunday is a University and the IDF, with the goal of not just training doctors little thing I can do today to help maintain to serve in the military but to train ‘combat doctors.’ To attend, and /or for more information, call 757-625-4295. a successful and thriving Jewish community The graduates of this seven-year medical program serve in for my children’s future,” she says.

sk anyone on this year’s Super Sunday planning committee why they became active in Jewish life in Tidewater and one word will be heard over and over: community. And that’s why they are all dedicated to strengthening the bonds in the community and securing its future. It fits right in with this year’s Super Sunday theme, which is all about seeing the United Jewish Federation of Tidewater’s mission clearly and showing everyone else what we see. “I believe in the values of our people and what we can accomplish if we unite behind a shared vision,” says Eitan Altshuler. “In areas like Hampton Roads, us Jews of the Diaspora have to make a point of being involved in our community so that we don’t have to stand alone here...being Jewish is not as much of an individual identity as it is of being part of a community.” The community includes the youngest Jews, celebrating when they first enter the world, to the oldest Jews, who are taken care of until their very last day of life. And

it’s everyone in between—those who go to camp every summer, those who bake Challah every Friday, those who daven every day of the week, and even those who only step inside a shul on the High Holidays. “I had the luxury of attending a UJFT mission trip to Israel in 2017. I saw firsthand how the money we raise on Super Sunday supports meaningful and critical programs,” says Amie Harrell, who is the leader of this year’s committee. “The families and organizations depend on our support. I feel fortunate and honored that my family plays a small part in their success,” she says. What was once called the Super Sunday Steering Committee is now Rishon: Emerging Leaders, which means “the first.” It’s not just for spreading the message of Super Sunday’s importance, but it’s developing the next generation of Jewish leaders in Tidewater. Past participants have made their mark through YAD and in the greater Tidewater community. It’s truly a

SUPER S U N D AY – SEE IT –

THROUGH 2O/2O VISION

Hebrew University and Israel Defense Forces: Israeli Elite Military Medical Program Tzarmeret

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what’s happening First Person

Author shares stories of challenges and chutzpah! Wednesday, November 6, 7:30 pm Sandler Family Campus

‘The Aussie Gourmet’ prepares for Jewish Norfolk

Naomi Nachman hosts the Vaad of Tidewater’s Chopped Competition Sunday, November 3, 5 pm, Sheraton Waterside Michelle London

Amy Zelenka, UJFT Campaign director

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n the precipice of Naomi Nachman’s visit to Norfolk, I had the opportunity to speak with her about her extensive travels, love of food, and what to expect at the Vaad of Tidwater’s Chopped Competition.

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first heard Inbal Arieli speak in January during the International Lion of Judah conference in Florida. She was one of an interesting group of panelists who shared their stories—all ground-breaking women in different ways. Arieli spoke about women on the cutting edge of the high-tech industries in Israel and about the challenges they face getting others to invest in them and their ideas. And, she spoke about the courage and fortitude that it takes to try…sometimes fail…possibly fail spectacularly…and then to get up and try again. Her professional life was a profile in that kind of courage. Arieli spoke about the unique Start Up Nation mentality which exists in Israel and about the challenges facing women trying to break into a network that has not been historically friendly to them. And while she was speaking, my mind was processing the irony of female intellectual exclusion. Her male high-tech start-up counterparts were failing at rates that were equal to—or in excess of—the women. These brilliant women scientists, engineers, and makers, were developing incredibly new products and ideas, while simultaneously raising families, taking care of aging parents, and making sure that Shabbat dinner was on the table each Friday night. And still, the venture capitalists who fuel the Start-Up Nation kept their sites primarily on male scientists and male entrepreneurs. Perhaps, Arieli suggested, it’s time for more female venture capitalists. Arieli talked about high-tech women

Inbal Arieli.

professionals from across industries coming together to network and share ideas for best practices, to empower one another, and to discuss ways to get in front of those who could capitalize their ideas. These women continue to be a source of strength and support for one another. The times… they are a ’changing.’ Or so it appears. Women are being identified earlier in their professional careers, in their high-tech IDF units, and some as early as in high school. And women like Inbal Arieli (and her fellow panelists at the International Lion of Judah Conference) are telling their stories, writing their books, and sharing their inspiration. Inbal Arieli will share her stories of Chutzpah with the Tidewater Jewish community, as she headlines the opening event of this year’s UJFT Israel Today series. While free and open to all members of the Jewish community, register on-line at: https://ujft.salsalabs.org/inbalarieli/index. html or contact Leigh Casson at 757-3212304 or lcasson@ujft.org.

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Michelle London: Shana Tova! I got my hands on a copy of your latest cookbook, Perfect Flavors. The onion brick roast was the favorite in my house over the holidays. Which dish was the highlight at your table? Naomi Nachman: I made these New York strip steaks that they went crazy over. Medium rare in the center. Spice it with salt and chili powder. It was really great and easy. ML: Though a native Australian transplanted to New York, your extensive travels around the globe, highlighted on your Instagram, The Aussie Gourmet, influence the recipes in Perfect Flavors. What does your food experience look like when you travel to a new locale? NN: Whenever I’m invited to go to a place, I’ll always come early and stay a day later because I want to experience the culture. I want to see how they prepare their food, where they prepare their food. I always like seeing the street food because that really reflects the local culture. In Bangkok, after talking to the vendors, seeing what goes in their food and watching them cook, I then went home and made it kosher for myself and that ended up the Thai Chicken Spring Rolls in the cookbook. ML: Our chefs for the Chopped Competition will need to be similarly creative with their mystery baskets. NN: Yes! Everybody gets 30 minutes to

Thai Spring Rolls.

prepare their dishes and will be judged on taste, creativity and presentation. Whoever cooks the best wins! ML: Any tips for our chefs? NN: Pace yourself. (Laughs) ML: What will a guest in the audience experience? NN: Fun, interactive evening. Lot of good laughs and excitement. ML: Successful catering business, radio show, cooking vlog, cookbook twice over, Instagram influencer, food demonstrations on traveling tours: what do you hope your fans and followers take away from ‘The Aussie Gourmet’? NN: Enjoy eating as much as I do. Bring food from around the world into the kitchen because we are one people. For tickets or sponsorship opportunities, email choppedva@gmail.com or call 757-572-2581.

Visit us on the web jewishnewsva.org


what’s happening Super Sunday 20/20—The Vision is Clear Sunday, November 17, 9:30 am–1 pm Sandler Family Campus

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matter what is happening in the world uper Sunday, as always, is being outside of the JCC, we stand in solidarity planned by a group of up and coming and with deep commitment to ensure the visionary leaders. future of our Jewish values.” Now called Rishon: Emerging Leaders, The emerging leaders’ VISION is the group has spent the last few months learning about the Jewish community and planning this special fundraising day supporting it. During the process, they’ve learned about United Jewish Federation of Tidewater’s Annual Community Campaign and the way those dollars impact locally and around the globe. They visited a few local agencies including Beth Sholom Village, Jewish Family Service, and Strelitz International Academy. They also had presentations from additional N O V E M B E R 17, 2 019 agencies they were unable to O U R V I S I O N I S C L E A R visit. “Super Sunday is the one S I G N U P AT J E W I S H V A . O R G / S U P E R S U N D AY day of year that our community rallies together for one clear. The United Jewish Federation of unified mission, to raise funds that supTidewater’s 2020 Vision is all about comport the Jewish agencies that matter to us, munity. Join the community and help says Amie Harrell, Super Sunday chair. “No make the calls that make a difference. This year, in addition to the Phone-A-Thon, Super Sunday School will take place at the Reba and Sam Sandler Family Campus. Seventh graders from the various Sunday Share your vision for the commuSchools will participate in a joint session nity on the Super Sunday 20/20 focusing on community and philanthropy. Facebook page and Sign up for “Having young community members one hour or two and make the involved in the efforts of Super Sunday calls that help bring the commuwill help insure our community’s future nity’s vision to life (Babysitting is bright!” says Jasmine Amitay, Young Leadership Campaign manager. available). “The funds we raise will help build on If it’s not possibe to attend the work that has been done for years to Super Sunday on November 17, ensure its continued growth and success. participate by answering the It is important that the entire community phone and making your gift to the supports the mission by volunteering to Community Campaign. make the calls and take the calls,” says Harrell. “Be a model for our younger genFor more information and to sign erations and show them how much this up to volunteer, visit: Jewishva.org/ community means to us.”

Calendar THROUGH OCTOBER A Century of Activity in Romania, an American Jewish Joint Distribution Committee exhibit in the Leon Family Gallery on the Reba and Sam Sandler Family Campus. NOVEMBER 3, SUNDAY Naomi Nachman, ‘The Aussie Gourmet’ will host the Vaad of Tidewater’s fall event for the Tidewater Chopped Champions at the Sheraton Waterside. For more information, choppedva@gmail.com or 757-572-2581. End-of-life ethics panel presented by Hadassah with Israeli physician and first female Orthodox rabbi as featured speakers at the Sandler Family Campus. Space may be limited, pre-registration encouraged. For more information, call Sharon Goretsky at hadassahNFKVB@ gmail.com or 757-535-9633. $18.

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NOVEMBER 4, MONDAY Author Christopher Noxon will speak about his book, Good Trouble—Lessons from the Civil Rights Playbook. For more information or to RSVP, pshelanski@ujft.org or 757-452-3184.

– SEE IT –

November 8, Friday Tidewater Chavurah’s Second Friday Shabbat Service. A “congregation without walls, ”events are held in members’ homes or at other locations. Rabbi Ellen Jaffe-Gill will lead the service, with prayers and joyful songs. An Oneg follows. For event information and location address, email carita@verizon.net or call 499-3660. Check out www.tidewaterchavurah.org or Tidewater Chavurah Facebook page for upcoming events.

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How to help on Super Sunday

November 10, Sunday Brith Sholom will hold its board meeting at 10 am followed by the general membership meeting at 11 am at the Beth Sholom Village in Virginia Beach. A memorial service will be led by Cantor Flax followed by a deluxe brunch. $3 per member ($5 at the door) or $10 per guest. Bring non-perishable food items or a cash donation for the JFS Food Pantry. Event deadline is Oct. 30 by noon. Contact LeeAnne Mallory at 757-461-1150 or Brith.Sholom1@ gmail.com for more information. November 16, Saturday Ohef Sholom Temple’s 175th Anniversary Gala at Ohef Sholom. Dinner, dancing, and more. 6:30 pm. $75 per person. For reservations or more information, 757-625-4295 or ohefsholom.org. November 17, Sunday Super Sunday. UJFT’s Young Adult Division’s annual phone-a-thon. Sandler Family Campus. 10 am–1 pm. For information or to volunteer, contact Jasmine Amitay at 757-965-6138 or jamitay@ujft.org. Brith Sholom will hold its Annual Thanksgiving Dinner at the Beth Sholom Village in Virginia Beach at 5:30pm. The menu will include salad, yeast rolls, roast turkey with gravy, dressing, mashed sweet potatoes with marshmallows, green bean almandine, cranberry sauce and apple slab pie with whipped topping for dessert. Entertainment will be a return engagement of singer Eddie Sal. Attire: Dressy. Event Deadline is Nov. 13 by noon. Contact LeeAnne Mallory at 757-461-1150 or Brith.Sholom1@gmail.com for more information. NOVEMBER 18, MONDAY Amy Blumenfeld, author of The Cast. Free, 7:30 pm, Simon Family JCC. For more information, pshelanski@ujft.org or 757-452-3184. DECEMBER 16, MONDAY Jane Bernstein, author of The Face Tells the Secret. For more information or to RSVP, pshelanski@ujft.org or 757-452-3184.

Send submissions for calendar to news@ujft.org. Be sure to note “calendar” in the subject. Include date, event name, sponsor, address, time, cost and phone.

SuperSunday.

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Obituaries Myron Joseph “Mike” Cohen Virginia Beach—Myron Joseph “Mike” Cohen, 84, died on October 1, 2019 in Virginia Beach, Virginia. Mike was born May 14, 1935 to Benjamin H. and Bertha (“Boonkie” Glasser) Cohen in Cincinnati, Ohio, the third of their three children. He married Reva Lola (“Lolly”) Burg on December 6, 1959 in Akron, Ohio with whom he had three children. After Lolly passed away in 1994, Mike married Carol Willis on July 17, 1998 with whom he lived in Virginia Beach and Palm Beach Gardens, Florida. Mike graduated from Ohio State University with a degree in Business Administration. He was highly successful in real estate, construction supply, and home building in Norfolk and Virginia Beach, co-founding Kitchen Towne, Towne Distributors, Sir Galahad Construction Company, and Aspen Building Corporation. He served in the Air Force Reserves and Air National Guard, declining promotion above Private except for one training mission on which he says that he agreed to be a “simulated colonel” after arguing with his commanding officer that he could do it better. This was characteristic of many situations throughout his life in which he insisted that he knew better than anyone else. He liked to claim that he was never wrong except once when he thought he was wrong, but it turned out that he was right. Upon retiring, he decided to change from “Type A” to “Type B”, but he insisted that he would be “the best d@#n Type B that you ever saw.”

Mike was completely devoted to Lolly and then to Carol. For 35 years, Mike and Lolly built a family and engaged actively in Tidewater, with deep connections to his mother’s large, extended family, and in Captiva. For 21 years, Mike and Carol pursued their shared passions for community engagement, golf, travel, and building several homes together in Virginia Beach, Captiva, and Palm Beach. Mike was a skilled jazz musician at the piano, saxophone, clarinet, and vibraphone, leading the Mike Cohen Trio during and after college, and the Satin Jazz quintet in Captiva, Florida during retirement, and many impromptu performances. He is remembered by many for his stirring sounding of the shofar at High Holy Day services at Ohef Sholom Temple in Norfolk, Virginia, and by a privileged few who got to hear him warm up by playing Hello Dolly. He fondly recalled a visit to Israel during which Ohef Sholom Temple acquired the shofar that they used for many years, and that he first blew publicly at the top of Masada. Mike participated actively in religious, civic, and professional organizations, with particular passion for the state of Israel, which he visited 11 times, proudly noting that his Bar Mitzvah was the day after Israel declared its independence on May 14, 1948. Mike was preceded in death by his parents, his brothers Stanley Fivel Cohen and Lee David Cohen, and his wife Lolly. He is survived by his wife Carol, his three children, Andrew (Susan), James (Lisa), and Betsy (Marc), and five grandchildren. A memorial service and reception was held at Ohef Sholom Temple.

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Jeffrey Haverson Virginia Beach—Jeffrey Haverson passed away at the age of 77 on Sept. 29, 2019 in Virginia Beach, Va. He was the son of the late Roslynne and Arthur Haverson. He was a loved Husband, Dad, Pop Pop, Brother, Friend, and Professional. He practiced law since 1966, and served many people with great passion and purpose. He is survived by his wife, Amy Chen Haverson and her children Candi Wong; son, Tony Wong and his wife Ashley. Survivors by his first wife, Sybil Friedberg, who predeceased him; are three daughters, Marci Steiner and husband Adam; Jill Haverson; Rachel Perlman and husband Matthew; as well as his five grandchildren, Haley Haverson, Noa Steiner, Josh Steiner, Jake Perlman, and Jack Perlman. Other survivors include his sister, Sheryl Haverson and brother, Marc Haverson and his wife Marilyn. A Jewish memorial service took place at Temple Israel. Any condolences or inquiries may be directed to: jeff.haverson.condolences@gmail.com. Sandra Lynn Goldberg Lipton Charleston, S.C.—Sandra Lynn Goldberg Lipton, 85 of Charleston, SC, died peacefully at home, surrounded by her loving family on Tuesday, October 1, 2019. Sandra was born at Baker Hospital on February 5, 1934, to Lenora Dumas Goldberg and Nathan Goldberg. A lifelong Charlestonian, who grew up on Grove St., Sandra graduated from Rivers High School and attended University of South Carolina. She married Dr. Morey Lipton, who was the love of her life, on October 29, 1955. Together they raised three children, Rachel, Ellen, and Mark. Sandra and Morey were married for 59 years. Family and her Jewish faith were very important to Sandra and she dedicated her life to both. Her parents were founding members of Synagogue Emanu-El, and from their example Sandra learned the importance of participating in Jewish life. She was an active member of the Charleston Jewish Community and served as president of Haddasah, president of the Synagogue Emanu-El Sisterhood,

and president of the Charleston Jewish Federation, as well as its Woman’s Division chairwoman. Sandra also spent many hours tutoring English to Russian children who had immigrated here and were attending Addlestone Hebrew Academy. Sandra was also very proud of her involvement in Charleston’s cultural and arts’ scene. She served on the Spoleto Festival USA board of directors for eight years and was one of the festival’s first volunteers when it began 42 years ago. Sandra hosted many dinner parties at her home for traveling dignitaries and artists who were making their way through Charleston. One of those guests was Spoleto founder and composer Gian Carlo Menotti. At one of her parties he expressed how much he loved her brownies and every year after when he was here for Spoleto she made sure he had a big batch of them. A story in Vogue magazine featuring Menotti even mentions Sandra’s famous brownies. She became known across the city and beyond for her culinary skills, Southern hospitality, and her flair for fashion. Sandra is preceded in death by her parents and her husband, Morey Lipton. She is survived by her son Mark Lipton of Virginia Beach; two daughters Ellen Yampolsky (Mark) and Rachel Lipton (Phil Wagers) of Charleston, S.C. and six grandchildren, Goldie Solodar, Sam Solodar (Angie), Jana Yampolsky, Justin Yampolsky, Seth Lipton, and Maya Lipton; and her great grandchild Carter Lipton. She leaves behind a sister, Joan Goldberg Sarnoff of New York City. Her funeral service was held at Synagogue Emanu-El. Burial followed immediately at the Emanu-El Cemetery in Maryville. Arrangements by J. Henry Stuhr, Inc. Downtown Chapel. Contributions in memorial to Sandra should be made to the charitable organization of donor’s choice. Charles Markman North Carolina—Charles Markman, age 96, formally of Boca Raton Florida, passed away in North Carolina October 10, 2019. Loving father of Joseph (Roslyn) Markman, Barbara (Murray) Ezring and


Obituaries Deborah (Avi) Fine; Cherished grandfather of Aviva Ezring, Tamar (Adam) Rotchstein, Ron Ezring, Gil Ezring, Yael Fine-Chai (Ariel), Gilad Fine and Nathan Fine; Dear brother of Doris Gruskin. Graveside services were held at Eternal Light Memorial Gardens in Boynton Beach, Florida. Memorial contributions to a Charity of Choice. Grace Roth Moskowitz Norfolk—Grace Roth Moskowitz passed away on September 4, 2019. Altmeyer Funeral Home Southside Chapel assisted with the arrangements. Jacalyn Brenner Newberg NORFOLK—Jacalyn Brenner Newberg passed away on October 6, 2019 after a courageous battle with cancer. Jacie was born September 21, 1953 in Norfolk and graduated from Granby High School. She was predeceased by her parents Fred and Pearl Brenner and her two brothers Joseph and Michael. She is survived by her husband Steve, their daughter Stacie Hannah Remington (Michael) and by loving nephews, nieces and in-laws. Jacie fought her disease as fiercely as she lived her life, always giving her all, whether it was being a devoted wife and mother, caring for her own mother and then mother-in-law Rosalin Newberg in their final years, preparing signature sandwiches, sailing on one of her and Steve’s many boats, and rooting for her beloved Chicago Cubs. The opportunity to attend a game at Wrigley Field a few years back was a highlight of Jacie’s too short life. Among those grieving the most is a group of women who were Jacie’s fellow 1971 Granby High alumni. Jacie and those friends stayed close for some five decades, sharing life’s downs, but mostly ups, whether it was celebrating milestone birthdays or just hanging out in their hometown. Jacie’s good humor, distinct voice and loving embrace will be sorely missed. Steve and Stacie thank the doctors and nurses who comprise the oncology team at DePaul Hospital in Norfolk, as well as

the staff at Beth Sholom Village where Jacie spent her last few days on earth. Funeral services were graveside at Forest Lawn Cemetery with a meal of consolation to following at Temple Israel. Donations in Jacie Newberg’s memory can be made to Temple Israel, the Brenner family’s synagogue home for decades.

granddaughters, Morrigan Rapaport and Nataly and Baylynn Hitt. No words written here could ever capture the light, the courage or the love of our Mother. Graveside services will be held at Forest Lawn Cemetery in Norfolk. Online condolences may be made to the family at hdoliver.com.

Audrey Goldspinner Rapaport Portsmouth – On October 4, 2019 Audrey Goldspinner Rapaport gave up raging against the dying of the light and went gently into that good night. The youngest of four daughters of Louis and Nellie Goldspinner, Audrey was born March 25, 1929 in Portsmouth, Va. She was predeceased by her husband, Leon Rapaport. She is survived by her sons Jon Rapaport (Cheryl) and Bob Rapaport (Terrie), four grandchildren, Zachary Rapaport, Bryce Rapaport Hitt (Bryan), Leah Rapaport Kutil (Jared) and Amy Rapaport (Crystal), and three great

Norman Slone Norfolk—Norman Slone, 83, died Tuesday, October 1, 2019 in his residence. He was a native of Brooklyn, New York and was the son of the late David and Leah Aronson Slomowitz. Mr. Slone was the retired owner of International Spring Corporation and continued on page 38

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LE AR N WH Y A D O N O R ADVI S E D F U N D I S R I G HT FO R YO U AN D YO U R FAM I LY

M E ET TH E SCHRANZS Craig, a Navy veteran, and his wife Joanna are strong believers in tzedekah and volunteerism. They support many organizations including several synagogues, Jewish War Veterans, and the Food Bank. For them, it’s important to share these philanthropic experiences with their three children and pass on these cherished values. Together with the Tidewater Jewish Foundation (TJF), a team they know and trust, Craig and Joanna established a Donor Advised Fund (DAF), ensuring that their tradition of tzedakah lives on for generations.

Obituaries continued from page 37

USA Discounters. He was a member of B’Nai Israel Congregation. Survivors include his wife Dorothy Stern Slone of Norfolk; his daughter, Sherri Slone and her husband James Steele of Virginia Beach; his sons, Jordan E. Slone and his wife Laurie of Norfolk, and Adam E. Slone of Ft. Lauderdale, Fla. He is also survived by his sisters Edith Lubetski of Brooklyn, N.Y. and Harriett Ormianer of Passaic, N.J; and his brother, Arnold Slone of Norfolk and four grandchildren and seven great grandchildren. The funeral service took place in the Norfolk chapel of H.D. Oliver Funeral Apts with burial in Forest Lawn Cemetery. Rabbi Sender Haber officiated. Memorial donations may be made to B’Nai Israel Congregation. Manuel Wyron Portsmouth—Manuel Wyron, 96, passed away Wednesday, October 9, 2019. A graveside service was held at Gomley Chesed Cemetery. Memorial donations may be made to the Lions Medical Eye Bank of Eastern Virginia. www.SturtevantFuneralHome.com.

Morton Mandel, Jewish businessman and philanthropist

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38 | Jewish News | October 28, 2019 | jewishnewsva.org

Morton Mandel, a Cleveland businessman who donated tens of millions of dollars to Jewish causes, has died. Mandel died this month at his home in Florida, according to the Cleveland Jewish News. He was 98. His family left Poland for the United States in 1913. Mandel was born in Cleveland in 1921. In 1940, he and his two brothers, Jack and Joseph, founded Premier Industrial Corp., an auto parts distributor that built off their uncle’s small store. It became a worldwide company listed on the New

York Stock Exchange in 1964 and merged with United Kingdom-based Farnell Electronics in 1996 to form Premier Farnell. In 1953, the brothers founded the Jack, Joseph and Morton Mandel Foundation, which has contributed to a number of Jewish and non-Jewish causes. The foundation has supported institutions including the Mandel Center for Studies in Jewish Education at Brandeis University and the Mandel Center for Advanced Holocaust Studies at the U.S. Holocaust Memorial Museum in Washington, D.C. In 1990, the foundation launched a branch in Israel to support a range of programs there. “Mort Mandel was a leader among leaders. The impact that he made in nurturing and growing leadership has without a doubt left a lasting impression on our community and the world. The countless number of leaders impacted because of his vision will be his legacy,” said Jewish Federation of Cleveland President Erika B. Rudin-Luria. Mandel founded more than a dozen nonprofit organizations and served as president of United Way Services in Cleveland. He received a number of awards for his work, including the Presidential Award for Private Sector Initiatives presented by President Ronald Reagan. “He left a huge legacy as a lover of Israel, as a Jewish leader, as a philanthropist making change,” said Isaac Herzog, head of the Jewish Agency, which works to build ties between Israel and the Jewish Diaspora. “He will be remembered for his leadership, innovative thinking and his passion for Israel and the Jewish people.” Mandel was predeceased by his brothers: Jack died in 2011 at 99 and Joseph in 2016 at 102. He is survived by his wife, Barbara, their three children and seven grandchildren. (JTA)


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