Kids

Kids Kk

What the Science Tells Us

KOALA

Kids are not little adults – they see the world differently. They don’t have all of the experience and knowledge that we have as adults, so things that are boring or uninteresting to a grown up can be new and fascinating for them, and things that we take for granted they might not know or understand.

Kids are also smaller, so the way they encounter and experience the world is different. For instance, a bug on the sidewalk is much closer and bigger to them than it is to us. We can get down on the ground with our toddler to see the world through their eyes from time to time, to see what they see, and experience what they experience. We can try to capture some of their wonder at the world, even if it’s just for a moment. We might feel silly, but we won’t seem that way to our child. Children don’t judge, they just want our time and attention. They want us to talk to them, to listen to them, and to meet them where they are at.

It may seem disheartening that our grown child will have no recollection of the love, attention, conversations, experiences and care we have given them in the early weeks, months and years of their life. Yet these are what contribute to our child’s lifelong mental, emotional, and physical health, their language learning and their social well-being. Children with a secure start to life are able to explore and learn throughout life. This is why we want to talk to our kid, listen to them and meet them where they are at. In this way we are giving them the best possible start to life.

What You Can Do

From the moment they are born, kids are great teachers who will change your world.

If you are able to recognize that all family members learn from each other you will be more likely to enjoy your family relationships, and everyone will learn more.

If you are able to accept that your child is unique and does not benefit from being compared with others you will build a strong bond with them that allows them and your relationship to flourish.

Be willing to: 

# Embrace your inner child and let things be fun and silly from time to time # Laugh with your child and play your child’s way.  Kids learn more when they are having fun # Accept that kids are messy, indoors and out, and that this can be good for their brain development, which is good for their language learning.  (You can still ask them to tidy up when playtime is over!) # Recognize when your child has interests that are different from yours, and give them the vocabulary to talk about them

Your child looks to you to know how to respond in a situation. When they are toddlers and inevitably fall down, it is usually not serious. If you say in your everyday voice, “Uh-oh, you fell down. You’re Ok. Up you get” your child will know this is nothing to worry about and might soon simply say “uh-oh” when they fall down. If you look frightened and make a big fuss, chances are they

will cry. Of course if the injury is serious you will want to comfort and provide first aid for your child, doing this with a reassuring voice.

One of the biggest challenges for parents is to know what to do in every situation. You want to encourage your child to develop their skills. For this they need to explore, indoors and out. Most kids know what they can do safely, but not all! And not when they are infants or toddlers. Because you know your child you will know how to guide them and what to say to them. When it comes to potential dangers, like electrical outlets, or bath time, YOU need to make the decisions for their safety and explain with words they can understand:

• Child: “Mama, doorbell” • Parent: “Yes, that is the doorbell.  Someone is at the door, but you are in the bath so they will just have to wait.  I never leave you alone in the bath.”

The best thing you can do is give your child a happy childhood. This is not about an excess of material things. This is about:

# Listening and responding to your child # Keeping your child nourished and safe # Giving your child simple routines that help them feel secure # Creating reasonable boundaries your child can understand and follow # Providing the opportunity for your child to play indoors and out

When kids get what they need early in life, they have the best opportunity to learn and thrive. This includes learning language. Your child deserves the love, attention, and respect you can give them. These put your child on the path to becoming a respectful, healthy, happy and functional citizen.